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by Sarcosuchas



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Action, Angst, Battle, Bonding, Consensual Sex, Consensual Underage Sex, Eventual Carl/OC, Eventual Romance, Fighting, Fights, Friendship, Grief/Mourning, Horror, Hurt/Comfort, Insanity, Killing, Loss of Control, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Multi, Mystery, Original Character Death(s), Original Character(s), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Trauma, Psychosis, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Suspense, Trauma, Trust, Underage Sex, Violence, War
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-05
Updated: 2017-02-24
Packaged: 2018-02-24 06:14:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 30
Words: 525,158
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2571128
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sarcosuchas/pseuds/Sarcosuchas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the fall of the prison Rick and Carl are forced onto the road. While Rick recovers from his injuries, Carl encounters a survivor only a few years older than himself. Despite his friendly nature, this young man hides some dark secrets. Is he a new threat, a new ally, or something else?<br/>Eventual Carl/OC<br/></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Time Lost

 

_Screaming. The unmistakeable high pitched cries of people in distress echoed around him. Below the piercing note of screams was the dull chorus of undead groans. The shambling undead corpses that were surrounding and biting into those screaming people. The smell of rotting flesh filled the air and assaulted the senses. One of the many tents had somehow caught fire, the smell of smoke taking to the air and a thick blanket of black smoke obscured their surroundings. Gunshots cracked through the horrific noise signalling some of the people’s last stands against the monsters that had invaded their camp. He heard it all as he ran, his heartbeat ringing in his ears almost as loudly as the terror unfolding behind him. His hand squeezed round the hand of his companion as he led them both to temporary safety._

_What seemed like hours that had passed had probably only been minutes but it didn’t matter to him. All he knew was that he couldn’t hear the screams or the groans or the gunshots anymore. He saw a building in his peripheral vision and guided his companion towards it. Pulling out a hatchet he ran up to the front door of what was previously a family’s home and kicked the door open. The inside of the house was dark. The moonlight couldn’t penetrate through the double layer of slate and tree branches above. He grabbed the dust-covered answering machine and tossed it into the room ahead of him, the noise of its landing deafening in the silence of the night. A single deathly moan came from the same room as one of the corpses revealed itself by stumbling towards the source of the noise. He moved forward swiftly and buried his hatchet in the back of the creature’s skull. The monster dropped to the floor with a thud and silence returned._

_The body was heavier than he expected it to be, causing him to groan in effort as he dragged it out of the house through the front door. He left it on the front porch, deciding it was better to move it in the morning light than in complete darkness. He walked back into the house and closed the door behind him. He wrapped his arms around a book case and groaned in effort as he moved it in front of the door as a makeshift barricade. He turned around and took in the sight before him. His companion was sitting in the middle of the room, cradling their knees in their arms as tears streamed from their eyes and rolled down their cheeks._

_He knelt down in front of them._

_“It’s okay, we’re safe for now.” He told them in an effort to calm them._

_His companion continued to cry however._

_“I’m sorry about the others but maybe some of them survived.” He suggested._

_“It’s not that.” Came the choked reply. “I was bit.”_

He awoke with a start, a sudden noise having roused him from his painful memories. He looked around him, taking his surroundings as his short term memory started to kick in. Wooden panels surrounded him, spider webs in the darker corners and a layer of dust covered most surfaces. He looked out the grime covered windows and saw tree branches and the hints of sunlight. That’s when it all came back. He was in a treehouse. He shifted and winced as the handle of the trapdoor beneath him dug into his back, forcing him to sit up-right.

He yawned and rubbed the sleep out of his blue eyes before pushing his messy brown hair back into place. Then the sound erupted again from the distance. It was the sound of an explosion. He listened closely and could make out the faint echo of gunfire. It sounded like a war. Grabbing his backpack, labelled “Jason”, he reached for a bottle of water and took a drink of it before stuffing it back in the bag. Reaching into the bag again, he took out a small book along with a pencil. Jason used the pencil to mark a new tally mark on one of the pages of the book before closing it and putting it back in his backpack. He lifted a brown leather jacket from the floor, put it over his black, long sleeved top and zipped it up. From the other side he picked up his holster and clipped the belt back round the waistband of his dark cargos before placing his handgun back into the holster. From the pockets of his leather jacket he withdrew a pair of black leather fingerless gloves and put them on. Getting down on one knee at a time he then tightened the laces of his black boots before slipping the strap of the backpack round his shoulder and opening the trapdoor of the treehouse.

Jason slowly climbed down the ladder that had been built into the tree-trunk and checked his surroundings. There was no sign of any undead which didn’t come as a surprise as they would all be drawn towards the sounds of battle in the distance. Despite the obvious danger and the stupidity of his decision, he allowed his curiosity to get the better of him and headed towards the battle.

By the time he had reached the source of the chaos the explosions and gunshots had come to an end. A thick cloud of dark smoke rose into the air as an equally thick chorus of undead groans echoed all-round the area. Jason kept himself hidden within some bushes and observed the area that all the corpses were marching to. It was the remains of a prison, the fences were now down, and fire was whipping out of holes in the walls and some of the windows. The courtyard was filled with bodies and the walking dead. Abandoned cars also littered the area and in the prison’s main yard there was a burning tank that was surrounded by undead trying to get to it. Most of the undead were marching through the courtyard up to the tank and into the ruins of the prison blocks. His eyes scanned the area for any signs of life and came across one figure walking through the grass of the courtyard. It looked like a woman and she was walking towards a body that was writhing on the ground. Jason watched her as she shot the head of the body before looking around herself as all the nearby corpses swarmed her and tore her apart. He averted his gaze as she went down and by doing so he spotted two figures heading into the foliage. They looked injured and vulnerable, their pace slow and broken by the limping of one of the figures. Usually Jason would walk the other way but it was clear that what had happened here was not from the undead but from people versus people. At the very least he could learn something from them and if they were hostile he could easily kill both of them given how weak they appeared. Checking his surroundings for corpses, he started walking in the same direction as the figures he had seen.

 

Carl marched down the leaf covered path with haste, his gaze focused ahead of him at all times. A few feet behind him, a beaten and blooded Rick followed him, limping from the gunshot wound to his thigh. The area was quiet and free of walkers but because of the severity of his injuries, Rick was starting to fall behind. His leg burned from the gunshot wound despite having applied a tourniquet using one of his shirt sleeves and the injuries to his face, left eye and forehead throbbed in agony. He grit his teeth from the sharp pain in his side, he guessed some of his ribs were broken.

“Carl.” He called out weakly. “Slow down.”

His adolescent son ignored his request and continued walking at a constant pace, far too fast for his broken body to keep up with.

“Carl, stop!” Rick bellowed, pain evident in the hoarse nature of his voice.

Carl finally stopped walking and stood still but continued looking at the road ahead.

“We need to stick together. We need to find a place.” Rick told him as he finally caught up. “Food, shelter, supplies.”

Carl refused to acknowledge his father, so Rick placed his bandaged hand on Carl’s shoulder.

“Hey, we’re gonna be…” Rick cut himself off as a result of the angry look his son gave him.

Carl looked ahead again and continued marching on with Rick limping in pain behind him.

 

The walker snarled at Jason as he made his approach through the dense vegetation. It started to approach him with stiff, unbalanced steps as it poorly navigated the maze of plants, roots, branches, and rocks. Jason marched towards it and took out a knife from a sheath on his belt. Once the walker was in striking distance he side-stepped the beast and stabbed the knife forcefully into its temple. Once he pulled the knife out the body dropped to the floor lifeless. He grabbed a large leaf from a tree and broke it at the stem. He folded the leaf over his knife and used it to clean the blade of walker blood before sheathing it again and discarding the leaf.

Jason burst out of the foliage onto an old path. He turned left and started walking down it, grateful for the total lack of undead or hostile living. As he made his way down the path he came across a patch of mud that contained recently made footprints. The footprints belonged to two people, one wearing flat shoes and the other wearing boots. He smiled and let out a sigh of relief, it looked like he hadn’t lost the trail of the two figures he saw back at the prison. Taking this as a sign he continued his journey with renewed vigour.

 

Carl and Rick had gathered some supplies and had now entered a small neighbourhood that appeared to be a ghost town. No signs of people or walkers though looks were always deceiving. With over a dozen houses any number of walkers could be hidden behind those walls.

The pains in Rick’s side, face and leg continued to throb and sting as constant reminders of the existence and extent of his injuries. The sun was getting low in the sky, a sign that in a couple hours it would be dark. They had to find shelter and the most obvious place would be one of the houses laid out before them.

“Hey.” Rick tried to get Carl’s attention. “Hey!”

Carl continued to ignore his injured father, however and kept walking. He was prepared to walk past another house when Rick spoke up again.

“Hey!”

Carl stopped and slowly turned around to look at his father as the man finally caught up with him. Rick nodded towards the house they were standing in front of.

“That one’s as good as any.” Rick declared with laboured breaths.

Silently agreeing, Carl took out his handgun from the holster on his thigh and walked towards the house, closely followed by Rick. When they reached the front door they discovered that it had previously been broken down, the lock splintered. They stood on opposite sides of the doorway as Rick put down their supplies and took out his revolver, wheezing as he did so.

“Quick and quiet.” He told Carl, staring at him. “We need to clear it before sundown.”

Rick shoulder barged the door as they both quickly stepped into the front room with their guns raised. The room was empty and silent, giving Rick time to close the door behind him as Carl began to venture off to one side of the house. The silence made him feel uneasy, even more so when he couldn’t hear his son.

“Carl.” He called out but unsurprisingly did not receive an answer.

Rick wheezed as he hauled himself towards the hallway and caught sight of his son who had his gun raised and was walking down the hallway slowly.

“Carl!” He called out again.

“I got it!” Carl finally responded. “All the doors down here are open.”

To Rick, that was several doorways that walkers could come out of at the same time and overwhelm him and his son. As injured and weak as he was, along with being a father, a fear of that very thing happening crept into Rick’s mind.

“Just stop!” Rick ordered him before Carl could take another step.

Carl lowered his gun and turned around, slamming his fist against the wall.

“Hey asshole!” The boy shouted, his face filled with rage. “Hey shitface!”

“Watch your mouth!” Rick shouted back angrily.

Carl gave him an incredulous look.

“Are you kidding me?” He glared at his father. “If there’s one of them down there, they would have come out.”

Rick stood in silence. He couldn’t think of anything to say as he was struggling to find the energy to stay in control of his son but also because he knew that what Carl had said was true. The house appeared to be free of any walkers. As Carl headed upstairs, Rick entered the kitchen, still with his gun raised as an act of caution but discovered it to be empty as well. He holstered his revolver and closed the fridge door. Carl was right. He searched the kitchen drawers for potential weapons and managed to find three knives.

Carl explored the rooms upstairs but every door that opened revealed an empty, abandoned room. By the looks of things this neighbourhood had been one of the first to evacuate, so only the essentials had been taken and everything else had been left behind. He walked into another room and was amazed at what he saw. The room had obviously belonged to a teenager, the walls painted a dark green but mostly covered in posters. Books, sports clothes and other items littered the floor with a skateboard next to the fireplace. Carl turned around and his eyes widened at the sight before him. A large HD television with an Xbox 360 hooked up to it, the headset balanced on the corner of the television and below it a stack of games cases with a controller. He marvelled at the sight of this artefact from the pre-apocalyptic world before catching sight of his own reflection in the TV screen. Reality came back to him in a flash forcing him to knock some of the games to the floor and take the power cables out of the console and television. They needed something to lock the front door with.

 

Jason sighed as he continued on his path. He had just crossed over some train tracks and was about to enter what looked like a small neighbourhood. The road was covered with dead leaves and there were no signs of any life. There weren’t many cars in view either. He figured most of the residents got out in the early days as the only cars he could see had obviously been involved in crashes, most likely during the initial panic. He remembered those days too vividly for his liking. His stomach growled, a reminder that he hadn’t consumed anything the entire day except for a few sips of water and the burning in his legs told him he needed to rest soon. He ran a hand through his hair and observed his surroundings. A ghost town full of undamaged houses.

“I’m spoiled for choice.” He muttered to himself and headed towards one of the homes.

Jason approached the front door and turned the handle but it didn’t open. The door had been locked by the original owners of the house during the start of the outbreak.

“Figures.” He sighed in irritation.

He looked around for any walkers or people. The street was empty. He turned his attention back to the door and kicked the lock with as much force as he could muster in his leg. The lock gave way and broke, the wood of the door splintering as it swung open and banged against the wall. He stepped in and closed the door over but delayed barricading it. There was no way of knowing if the door had been locked from the outside or the inside. The occupants could have all committed suicide and could now be lurking in one of the rooms.

Jason took out his knife from its sheath and held it tightly in his hand. He stepped into the house and started whistling a little tune while listening out for anything out of the ordinary. The house appeared to be completely vacant. Reaching the other side of the house he checked the backdoor but it too was locked. He ascended the staircase and took note to sniff the air but the smell of rotting flesh wasn’t present. He stopped at the top of the stairs to find all the bedroom doors open. He continued whistling but there wasn’t a sound apart from that. Smiling in success he returned to the front room and barricaded the door with the two couches that were there.

Jason sat back on one of the couches and closed his eyes for a moment, giving himself time to think about things. Here he was in some unknown neighbourhood on the trail of a couple of strangers who could be dangerous. He reminded himself he had nowhere else to be or anywhere planned to go to so he could afford to do this. His stomach growled again, interrupting his thoughts and forcing him to open his eyes. He opened his backpack and pulled a plastic container which contained fresh fruit that he had picked from trees on his way there. He decided to allow himself half of the contents for dinner with the other half for breakfast in the morning. He would need to go on a supply run in the morning too.

 

Carl used the power cables to tie the door handle to the curtain hook while Rick looked out the windows at the dark street to check for any potential threats.

“Find anything?” He asked his son who ignored him.

“Check the backdoor?” He asked but was ignored again.

Grinding his teeth in irritation he walked over to the far end of the couch and started pushing it towards the door, grunting in pain and effort as his leg and side couldn’t supply the strength required to move it.

“I tied the door shut.” Carl told him, turning around, annoyed at his father’s lack of faith.

Rick peered up at him from behind the couch.

“We don’t need to take any chances.” He retorted and attempted to push it again.

“You don’t think it will hold?” Carl asked.

“Carl…” Rick attempted a retort.

“It’s a strong knot. Clove hitch. Shane taught me.” Carl glared at his father. “Remember him?”

The mention of that name stabbed right through Rick’s heart. Shane had been his best friend, his brother since he was younger than Carl. A man he trusted with his life who ended up trying to steal his family from him and shoot him in the back. He had been forced to kill a man he considered his brother, a man he loved.

“Yeah I remember him. I remember him every day.” Rick answered before glaring angrily. “There something else you want to say to me?”

Carl lowered his head so that his hat covered most of his face. Despite his anger he still couldn’t find the courage to fully stand up to his father, the boy inside him still holding him back.

Rick continued to glare before growling at Carl. “Help me move the couch!”

Carl, defeated, did as he was told and together they moved the couch into place easily. Despite this, Rick was still wheezing from the effort, his damaged ribs making it difficult to breathe. As he started undoing the buckle on his holster he swapped places with Carl.

“This’ll have to do for the night.” He told him, his tone cold.

He put his holster on the floor in front of him and sat on the couch. As Carl was organising some things Rick offered him a packet of food.

“You gonna have some?” Carl asked him.

Rick nodded. “You should eat.”

“We should save it.” Carl quickly retorted.

Rick ignored him and tried to open the packet. He growled in frustration as he couldn’t find the strength to open it.  Suddenly Carl grabbed the packet out of his hands, opened with ease and threw it back into his father’s hands before continuing to set up his sleeping arrangements.

Rick took a bite of the food but winced in pain. The left side of his face was agony as soon as he attempted to chew it. He stood up and walked up behind his son.

“Hey.” He got the boy’s attention.

Carl spun round and glared at him. “I don’t want any.”

Rick snarled and threw the packet at him. “Eat it. Now.”

Rick walked past his son and headed for the bathroom. Once there he unbuttoned what was left of his shirt and struggled to take it off, wincing in pain at each movement. Once it was off he finally got a look at his badly beaten and blooded face. He cast his gaze down to his left side and wheezed as he took in the dark purple colouration of the skin. He had never broken his ribs before so he was unsure if this was a sign of that or of internal bleeding. Was there inner damage that he had no way to recover from? Was there a chance his injuries could kill him? If that happened he could reanimate during the night and kill Carl as the boy slept. Rick looked back at his reflection and for the first time since he woke up from his coma he felt true fear and vulnerability.

 

_The birds sang a cheerful chorus, a song that was a contradiction to the harsh reality of the new world. For the birds nothing had really changed but for the few people remaining life was now a nightmare filled with hungry monsters. The sky was a clear blue, not a single cloud could be seen for miles allowing the sun to shine over the whole area, illuminating the lush green of the vegetation and making the water of the lake sparkle with its warm rays._

_Jason threw a stone, skipping it across the surface of the water. This lake was isolated from any known roads and paths and had some of the clearest water he’d ever seen. Every time he would skip a stone across the surface the fish below would scatter and swim to the safety of deeper water. The birds in the tree branches above him continued to sing their afternoon song which to him always sounded happy no matter what was happening around them._

_He took a break from skipping the stones and cupped some of the water in his hands before throwing it over his head, wetting his hair and face in an attempt to cool down under the sun’s unrelenting blasts of heat. He lay back on the grass with the back of his head in his hands and stared up at the clear blue sky. Even though the dead had risen and started eating the living, there was nothing but peace at the lake._

_“Remember when we used to come here?” His companion beside him spoke. “I mean, before all of this.”_

_Jason continued to look at the sky but a smile did cross his face._

_“Yeah, I remember. We used to swim together all the time.” He grinned at the memory. “But we can’t do that right now. We can’t risk the noise.”_

_“Can’t risk the noise, or can’t risk it ending the way it always did?” Came the suggestive reply._

_Jason laughed lightly. “Both.”_

_“Kinda sucks, you know, how we can’t have that kind of fun.” His companion with disappointment lacing his tone._

_Jason turned his head to face them. “No. No it doesn’t suck.”_

_His gaze was returned by the person beside him, their blonde hair reflecting the sunlight. “Why not?”_

_Jason reached out and took one of their hands in his hand. “Because all around us people are dying, the dead have risen to eat the living and the world is over.” He explained, giving their hand a squeeze. “But we’re here. Together. Right now. That doesn’t suck.”_

_“But what if that changes?” They asked him, fear in their voice. “What if something happens?”_

_Jason squeezed their hand tighter. “Nothing will happen.”_

_“How can you be so sure?”_

_Jason kissed them softly. “Because I’ll always protect you and keep us safe. I promise.”_

Jason felt heat stinging his face and opened his eyes, squinting as soon as he did so as the sunlight that was streaming through the window attacked his eyes. He covered his face with an outstretched hand before sitting up and stretching with a yawn. He moved his sleeve and looked at his watch. Midday. He rubbed his eyes with his thumb and forefinger. He had slept in longer than he anticipated.

“Damn couch was too comfy.” He muttered to himself before reaching for his backpack.

Jason pulled out his bottle of water and took his morning drink before opening the plastic container with the fruit inside. As planned he had saved half of the contents as breakfast and wasted no time in consuming the fruit. At least he would have food in him for the rest of the day considering he needed the energy for his supply run. He ran a hand through his hair and attempted to fix it into a reasonable position before finally standing up and clipping on his holster. He sat back down and put his water bottle and now empty plastic container back inside his bag and withdrew the small book again. With his pencil he made another mark on the same page as before and put both items away.

Jason stood up again after tightening the laces on his boots and put his leather jack and gloves back on. He grabbed his backpack and put the strap over his shoulder before moving the two couches so he could open the front door again. As he looked out at the street he felt fortunate. This neighbourhood, for whatever reason, appeared to be almost free of the undead allowing him to relax just a little. He walked out onto the street and took a good look at his surroundings to confirm the impression that the area was deserted. Once he was sure he started walking up the rood, his feet crunching the carpet of leaves that covered the tarmac as he scanned the houses for any signs of life. Despite the silence of the neighbourhood, he never took his hands away from his knife and gun. The pair he had seen the previous day must have stayed here overnight and he hoped they were too injured to have just set off as soon as the sun came up.

As he walked down the street he took in the design of the houses. All of these houses would have fetched good prices back in the days before the apocalypse. Most would have been owned by families with children, with secure mortgages, decent incomes from good jobs, plenty of kids playing in the street with skateboards, bicycles and balls. Christmas time would have transformed the neighbourhood with festive lights and decorations. It would have been a wonderful place to live and grow up in. He felt a stab in his heart as he reminded himself that all of that was gone forever. Now these houses would remain for years to come, slowly falling apart and rotting much like the undead monsters that populated the land before they would collapse and disappear. With the disappearance of those buildings the memories and the people who lived in them would also disappear from history forever.

Two gunshots quickly brought him out of his thoughts. He looked around but couldn’t see anyone. A third shot rang out further down the street but was followed by silence. That could be good or bad. Jason took off running towards the source of the gunshots but with so many similar looking houses it was hard to pinpoint which house he needed to go to. After running for a couple minutes he stopped to catch his breath, his eyes quickly scanning the area, looking for any signs of life or death if it turned out that way. He grit his teeth in frustration, the familiar feeling of failure looming over him like a sinister shadow.

That’s when he heard it. The faint click and scratch of a window being opened. His eyes scanned the upper floors of the houses until they settled on the right window. He caught a glimpse of the arm of a living person quickly retreat back into the room. With no new gunshots he quickly assumed the person had run out of ammo. Without thinking twice he ran into the house through the front door that had been broken open and headed up the stairs, pulling out his gun as he went.

Jason made it to the top of the stairs just as he heard one of the bedroom doors slam shut. He aimed his gun at the direction of the noise and studied the sight before him. With their back against the door as they tried to catch their breath was a boy. He couldn’t be any older than sixteen. He had a gun holster on the right thigh of his jeans but no gun. His dirty top was blue and grey. His long dark hair whipped out from under the sheriff’s hat he wore but the most striking thing was that he only had one boot on. Before Jason could make any more observations the boy froze as he finally became aware of Jason’s presence. He didn’t say anything. His eyes darted to his gun that lay on the floor, too far away to reach quickly. He stared back at Jason with an intense look of fear in his blue eyes.

Sensing that the boy was afraid of him, Jason decided to attempt communication but kept his gun aimed at the boy.

“Hey, kid.” He said calmly. “You okay?”

The boy stared at him for a moment, his breath still uneven. “I’m not a kid.”

Jason smirked but didn’t lower his aim. “Yeah, well you aren’t a man yet either.”

The boy didn’t answer him, unsure of how to respond.

“What’s your name?” Jason asked him, trying to keep his tone friendly.

The boy appeared to hesitate for a moment before finally answering. “Carl.”

Carl lowered his gaze, hiding his face with his hat like he had done to his father the night before. After the horrible things he had said to his unconscious father that morning, he now wished that Rick could appear to protect him from this stranger who was aiming a gun at him.

“Alright then, Carl.” Jason spoke softly. “How old are you?”

Carl hesitated again, unable to predict where these questions were leading. “Fourteen.”

Jason nodded to acknowledge the answer while pondering his next question for the boy. He glanced at the door behind Carl, the nametag on the door read “Sam”.

“You look tired. What happened?” He asked the teen. “Did you and Sam have a fight?”

Carl looked confused at the mention of the name, the adrenaline still coursing through his veins blocking his memory of the nametag on the door. Noticing his confusion, Jason simplified the question.

“What’s behind the door?”

Carl glanced at the door but quickly brought his eyes back to Jason’s gun.

“A walker.” Was his answer.

Jason had never heard the term walker before but he understood what the boy meant. His eyes scanned the boy’s body before asking an important question.

“Were you bit?” His voice threatened to betray his calm appeareance.

Carl shook his head, looking down for a moment.

“No.” He answered. “But it got my shoe.”

Jason couldn’t stop a smile from creeping onto his face. Before he could lower his gun he reminded himself that he needed to know a couple more things.

“You don’t look like you’ve been on the road long.” He declared. “Have you got a camp with more people?”

Carl stared back at the young man before him. Though he tried to hide his grief, his eyes betrayed him and forced him to rub the hints of tears on his sleeve.

“No. It’s just me and my Dad now.” He answered, not looking up.

Jason thought for a moment. “And where’s your Dad now? Does he know you’re here?”

Carl considered lying to the man but if anything went wrong he would be found out quickly anyway. He remembered that Hershel taught him that honesty was often the best thing and reflected on who a person is.

“No. He’s injured.” Carl answered slowly. “We’re staying in one of the houses down the street.”

Jason could tell this was the truth so he finally lowered his gun. This teenager in front of him was one of the figures he had seen enter the woods at the prison. He holstered his gun and smiled, keeping his hands where Carl could see them so as to not arouse suspicion.

“Well, Carl. I’m Jason.” He told him, still smiling. “I’m not going to hurt you, I just needed to be sure you weren’t going to hurt me.”

Carl didn’t answer him. This didn’t make sense. Most people would have shot him or hurt him by now but this man seemed friendly. Almost too friendly. He watched Jason as he picked up Carl’s empty gun and handed it back to him. Carl took the gun back and holstered it.

Jason reached into one of the pockets of his cargos and withdrew a magazine. He handed it to Carl who hesitantly accepted it.

“I think those will fit your Beretta there.” Jason told him. “15 rounds, 9x19mm bullets.”

Carl nodded and ejected the empty magazine from the gun and reloaded it with the gift from Jason. He still couldn’t understand what this guy was doing. Did he really trust him enough to give him a loaded weapon?

Jason gently pushed the teen away from the door.

“Do me a favour and stand back.” He told him, reaching for the handle.

“What are you doing?” Carl asked him, confused.

“Getting your shoe.”

Jason took out his knife and opened the door. The walker came charging out at him forcing him to jump back. Once the walker’s lunge had finished, he kicked the corpse in the knee cap to bring it crashing to the floor. As soon as its head hit the floor he thrust his knife into the skull and killed it. He stood up straight and smiled at Carl before sheathing the knife and grabbing the boot that was lying in the middle of the room.

Carl accepted the return of his shoe with a smile and quickly put it back on his foot.

“Thanks.” He said, still feeling uneasy.

“No problem.” Jason answered with a smile before his expression changed. “Is your Dad safe where he is?”

Carl thought for a moment before answering. “If he doesn’t wake up he should be fine.”

Jason accepted this answer. “Then we should get you some food. You look a bit pale.”

Jason made his way down the stairs but Carl hadn’t moved. This caused Jason to stop half-way down the stairs and look up at the fourteen-year-old.

“What’s wrong?” He asked.

“Why are you helping me?” Carl asked. “What do you want?”

Jason sighed. The boy was stubborn. “Tell you what, you come down here with me and get something to eat. In exchange I’ll answer your questions.”

Carl considered the proposition before nodding. Just as Jason was about to continue down the stairs Carl spoke up.

“I found some chocolate pudding in the kitchen.” He told him. In a childish way he was trying to claim it as his.

Jason thought for a moment and glanced at one of the open bedroom doors. He pointed at one of them which had a window facing out onto the street.

“See that window through there?” He asked Carl, who took a look. “Climb out it onto the roof and wait for me there.”

“Why?” Carl asked, confused again.

“It’s easier to eat without the smell of a rotting corpse next to you.” Jason told him, gesturing to the dead walker. “And it lets us keep a lookout for danger or your Dad.”

Carl accepted this answer and walked into the bedroom and carefully climbed out the window. As he waited for Jason to join him, he kept his hand on his gun in case all of this was an elabourate trick to make him drop his guard.

However, Jason came out onto the roof a few minutes later with Carl’s bag of supplies in one hand and the can of pudding in the other. They both sat on the rooftop with their legs dangling over the side and looked out onto the abandoned street. Carl opened the can and started taking spoonfuls of pudding, his tastebuds jumping at the sweet taste. This was a taste he had almost forgotten.

Without being prompted, Jason decided to answer Carl’s questions.

“I’ve been alone for six months now.” He told the teen. “When it’s just you and the dead, you start to miss human contact.”

“What happened to the people you knew?” Carl asked him in between mouthfuls of pudding.

“They all died.” Jason answered simply, not wanting to give details just yet.

Carl didn’t push the question, having just lost everyone he cared about apart from his father, he knew how it felt and could only imagine how much harder it was being alone. As he studied Jason’s face, he realised that this man was a lot younger than he originally thought and couldn’t been any older than twenty.

“I know you were living at that prison.” Jason stated. “I heard the battle and saw you and your dad escaping into the woodland.”

Carl stayed silent as the dots started to connect.

“I saw that you were vulnerable and tried to catch up to you both.” He told the boy, looking away. “I didn’t want to be alone anymore.”

“But we could have been dangerous.” Carl told him, remembering how dangerous the Governor had turned out to be.

“That’s why I aimed this at you for a while.” Jason told him, pulling out his Springfield Armory TRP Operator handgun. “But you seem like a good guy so I didn’t shoot you.”

Carl watched as he holstered the gun again. “When my Dad wakes up, he’ll want to talk to you.” He told the young man. “Find out if you’re a threat.”

“I can handle that.” Jason told him before lying back to look up at the sky as Carl continued to eat. “But for now, let’s enjoy the peacefulness of the afternoon.”

Carl seemed to agree and continued eating the pudding before he stopped, looking at the half empty can.

“Do you want some?” He asked Jason, suddenly feeling quite selfish.

“What?” Jason asked, having been lost in his thoughts for a moment.

“Do you want some pudding?” Carl asked again.

“No thanks. You’ve been through a lot today.” Jason replied with a smile. “You have it.”

Carl resumed his eating as Jason continued to look up at the sky. It was a beautiful afternoon with a clear blue sky. Scanning the sky he couldn’t see a single cloud for miles.

_“I’ll always protect you and keep us safe. I promise.”_

 

**So this fanfic idea just came to me recently. I’ve been working on a different story but this was one idea that wouldn’t stop nagging my creative side. So I decided to start it and it has managed to write itself in 2 days. I originally planned to end this chapter at the ending of “After” but this point felt much more natural for some reason.**

**This story will follow the series closely but I will also go off in different tangents as the drama unfolds. I hope my character, Jason, is of interest to you all as readers.**

**Leave a review if you’ve read this far ^^**


	2. Hope Restored

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carl brings Jason back to the house where Rick lies unconscious. They grow closer, leading to conflict between Jason and Rick.

_The music was loud, echoing all around the dark room. Strobe lights of multiple colours illuminated the room as people danced in the centre of the room, some alone others together and others in groups. Off to the sides of the dance floor, people sat at tables enjoying drinks. Some were couples, others friends and a rare few were alone. The darkness of the club made it impossible to tell the time of day outside as it had no windows._

_Jason was sitting round the side from the bar. Behind the bar and the DJ’s box was a quieter sitting area that was illuminated by UV lights that in turn illuminated parts of clothing, jewellery and teeth. He sat alone with a drink of water. Despite the great variety of alcoholic drinks and soft drinks he refused to have any of them._

_He glanced over towards the dance hall to watch a couple dancing. He had come to the club with a friend as part of a night out in the town for some fun. However, his friend had caught sight of an attractive young woman and appeared to have forgotten about Jason’s existence as a consequence. He sighed in frustration, his shoulders falling with the release of air as he pushed one of his hair bangs out of his eye._

_“Why not go up and dance instead of sitting here sulking?” A voice asked him from behind._

_He whipped around to look at the owner. They looked a little younger than he was with stylish blonde hair that made them stand out in a crowd. Brown eyes gazing into Jason’s blue ones._

_“I’m not much of a dancer.” Jason replied with a smile. “Just been abandoned by a friend, that’s all.”_

_“Oh so you’re alone.” The blonde replied. “Perfect.”_

_“And why is that perfect?” Jason asked, confused. “Loneliness is never good.”_

_“Means I can sit here and no one will complain.” The blonde answered, sitting next to him. “And now you’re no longer alone.”_

_The blonde giggled at their own declaration, though there was also a nervousness in the giggle that Jason picked up on. To ease the tension and to allow himself the opportunity to forget about his treacherous friend, he laughed along with the blonde._

_“So don’t you have a girlfriend you could be with?” The blonde asked out of curiosity._

_Jason shook his head and chuckled. “Nope, I’m a single pringle.”_

_“A solo rolo.” The blonde interjected with a laugh of their own._

_Both individuals laughed at the silly nature of their statements. Jason had successfully forgotten about his friend and found his attention being fixated on the blonde beauty beside him._

_“So what’s your name?” The blonde asked him with a sweet smile._

_“Jason.” He answered with a matching smile. “What’s yours?”_

Jason’s eyes shot open at the sound of a loud thud. A body hitting the floor. He rolled out of the bed he was sleeping in and grabbed his gun from the holster, not bothering to put it on. He grunted as he moved the bed away from the door, having barricaded the bedroom door before letting himself fall asleep. It all came back to him as he moved the bed and opened the door. Carl had brought him back to the house they were in. He had seen his beaten father lying unconscious on the couch, presumably in some kind of coma induced from his injuries. There had been a thud. It was the middle of the night. Had the man died? Had he turned? Jason wasn’t sure he could trust Carl to put down his own father if it were the case and that would only be if the boy was even awake yet.

Listening carefully he could hear laboured rasps and sobbing. He recognised the high pitched spikes to the sobbing and identified it as Carl. The boy was crying. He heard rasps. The boy was crying. His father had turned. He hadn’t heard a gunshot. Jason flicked the safety off his gun and rushed out of the bedroom, thundering down the stairs and through into the front room before anything happened. The sight that greeted him was not what he expected.

Rick lay on his back on the floor, his arms and legs splayed out. He appeared to be unconscious yet again as his mouth hung open slightly and his eyes were closed. Carl was cradling his father’s head in his hands and was resting his own forehead on his father’s forehead.

“I’m scared.” Carl choked out weakly.

Carl had thought his father had turned but couldn’t find the strength to pull the trigger. Though it was fortunate that he hadn’t because Rick was still very much alive it had signalled the harsh reality to the boy. Despite the things he had said the day before, he wasn’t ready to live without his father. He didn’t have the strength to go it alone and he still didn’t trust the young man he had met enough to feel safe with him yet. Regardless of his poor physical condition his father’s words upon waking had been those of a concerned father. Don’t go outside. Something he had already done. Stay safe. Something he was trying to do now.

“Carl?” Jason’s voice broke the silence in the dark room.

Carl looked up, his eyes red with grief and his cheeks damp from his tears. Upon seeing Jason’s gun aimed at him for the second time that day he shifted so that his father’s head was behind him.

“He’s not dead.” Carl defended weakly.

Jason noted Rick’s chest rising and falling and flicked the safety back on his gun and stuffed it into the back of his belt. It felt strange having the gun there, having grown so accustomed to keeping it in his holster. He ignored the minor complaint and sat on the floor next to Carl. His eyes studied the grief and guilt stricken fourteen year old.

“Hey, you okay?” He asked. He knew the answer already but asked to give Carl the chance to decide what he told him.

“I…I said horrible things to him yesterday.” Carl admitted, the tears falling anew. “I blamed him for what happened and told him I didn’t need him.”

Jason nodded his head slowly. “But it wasn’t his fault, was it?”

Carl shook his head forcefully, some of his tears landing on Jason’s lap.

“And you do need him, don’t you?” Jason asked softly.

Carl nodded violently, crying more. “He’s all I have left…from before…”

Jason’s instincts took over and without thinking twice he wrapped an arm around the boy gently. Carl with his defences down and his body racked with grief, turned towards the young man and cuddled into his chest, his tears landing on Jason’s black shirt creating damp patches. Jason pulled the fourteen year old closer and stroked his messy brown hair gently, letting out soft, reassuring sounds of comfort as the boy continued to cry.

The ferocity of the boy’s tears told him everything he needed to know. These weren’t just tears of guilt for having been nasty to his injured father. These weren’t just tears of grief from believing his father to be dead a moment ago. These were the tears from everything. The accumulated grief from all the awful things he had been through, from the violence of the world, the constant nightmare he was forced to live and most importantly the pain and emptiness caused by the loss of loved ones. Jason didn’t know any names or numbers but if they had stayed at the prison then there must have been a lot of people which meant that Carl had lost a lot of people. Catching a glimpse of what life without his father would be had been enough to finally break the boy.

“He’s going to be fine. You won’t lose him.” Jason whispered to the boy who had just stopped crying. “I promise.”

He stroked the boys head and back softly, holding back his own grief because he knew he had to be strong for Carl. He couldn’t let his own pain show, not even for a moment.

“No matter what happens, I’ll keep you safe.” Jason told him. “I promise.”

When Carl didn’t answer and his body didn’t convulse from his sobbing, Jason peered down to see what was wrong. The calm expression on the boy’s face along with his closed eyes told Jason everything. Carl had cried himself to sleep but remained cuddled into his chest. Jason smiled softly and looked around the room. Some traces of moonlight were streaming in through the thin curtains. Rick was still breathing and so was Carl. It reminded him of a night he’d never want to have to repeat. Pushing the dark thoughts from his mind, Jason tilted his head back against the armchair and let himself fall asleep, his arms still wrapped around Carl’s smaller frame.

 

_There was an intense flash of lightning that illuminated the room before darkness reclaimed it. Moments later a loud crash of thunder sounded in the sky before the heavens opened and a torrent of rain came crashing down outside. The rain drops pelted the windows of the house and drummed against the rooftop loudly. The constant, rapid pounding of the rain was only interrupted by more loud echoes of thunder accompanied by the blinding flashes of lightning._

_Jason stared into his companion’s eyes, the blood draining from his face as his head began to feel light and his legs weak. The words that had just been said to him repeated themselves inside his head, echoing in his mind as if it was a large empty cave._

_“I was bit.”_

_The statement repeated itself, leaving Jason frozen with shock and confusion. He hadn’t seen it happen. It all happened so fast. He had got to them as fast as he could. It wasn’t fast enough. They were supposed to survive together. His companion was going to die. He promised to keep them safe. He had broken his promise._

_Jason felt his body shake and had to grab the coffee table for support, fearing he would lose his balance and collapse from the sudden weakness shooting through his core. This couldn’t be happening. He caught himself praying for it to be some twisted nightmare that he would wake up from at any moment. He had done everything in his power and the cruel reality was that it hadn’t been enough. Not only had he broken his promise to the person closest to him but that broken promise meant these were their final moments together._

_Jason collapsed to the floor, rolling on his back and grabbing his head in his hands as he cried out in agony. This agony was not physical but emotional. His heart was shattering to pieces in his chest as tears streamed out of his eyes, temporarily blinding him until he tilted his head and let them roll down his face. Rolling onto his side he punched the wooden floor repeatedly in frustration, anger and guilt. Blood stained the floor as the skin of his hand broke and split from the repeated trauma._

_He opened his eyes, not remembering when he had closed them as someone’s arms were lifting him off the floor and back into a sitting position. His companion pulled him in close so that his head was against their chest. He wrapped his arms around them tightly as they reciprocated the action. Another burst of lightning allowed him to see the bite in his companion’s side, just below their last rib. Jason cuddled in closer and sobbed into their chest, leaving damp patches on their shirt as his companion’s tears fell into his hair._

_“I’m so, so, so sorry.” Jason choked out between sobs. “Fuck I’m sorry, I fucked up. It should be me. Me. Not you.”_

_His companion held him tighter, pulling him closer and kissed the top of his head._

_“It’s not your fault.” His companion reassured him. “If it was you I’d die. I would lose any reason to go on. Then we’d both be dead.”_

_“But isn’t that what is going to happen anyway?” Jason sobbed, staring up at them._

_“No, I don’t want you to kill yourself.” Came the reply as they winced in pain._

_“So I’m supposed to be alone again?” Jason asked in painful confusion._

_“I’ll never leave you, baby.” Another kiss was placed to his forehead. “But I can’t lose anyone else to suicide, no matter what.”_

_Jason lowered his head and cuddled in closer again. “So what then?”_

_“You have to keep going. For me.” They replied between their own sobs. “Because your time to die is not now. You’re supposed to live.”_

_“How do you know that?” Jason asked, not accepting the idea of being left alone._

_“I don’t. But I believe it.” His companion answered. “Promise me you won’t give up.”_

_Jason cried harder, taking several moments before he could control his breathing enough to answer._

_“I promise.”_

_“There’s two more promises you need to make me.” They could feel the fever starting, the infection attacking their body._

_Jason could sense the distress but forced himself to stay calm enough to talk._

_“What else?” He asked weakly._

_“When the time comes I want you to shoot me.” The request shocked Jason. “I don’t want to be walking around without a soul.”_

_“But…but I don’t have a gun.” Jason admitted, regret striking him hard. He had lost it back at the camp._

_His companion produced a gun from the back of their belt, a Springfield Armory TRP Operator, and handed it to Jason as if it was a present._

_“Now you do.”_

_Jason held the gun in his hands for a moment. That’s when he noticed the blood stains on his sleeve from the bite wound in his companion’s side. He shut his eyes forcefully, scrunching up his face as more tears came bursting out. He holstered the gun, knowing that it would take all his strength and more to pull the trigger when the time came._

_“What’s…what’s the last…last promise?” Jason choked out, his breathing coming out as gasps._

_“Stay with me until time runs out.”_

_Jason’s tears came out faster and harder as he nodded his head violently. He felt a pair of hands cupping his face. He blinked the tears out of his vision and looked into his companion’s brown eyes. His companion brought them together so they could share a kiss. It was soft, delicate and loving. When they broke apart they held each other close._

_Outside, the rain continued to crash down violently, bouncing off the ground, hammering them roof of the house and pelting the glass windows like small stones. The lighting flashed again, casting the shadow of the couple’s embrace onto the wall before darkness covered it up. The thunder roared across the sky with ferocity._

_“I promise.” Jason whispered, pulling them as close together as possible._

Jason felt himself slowly fade back into consciousness. Discomfort in his neck struck him quickly, reminding him that he was in the front room and had fell asleep with Carl. He moved his arms, searching for the boy but couldn’t seem to find him. Perhaps he had woken before him. That would be normal and nothing to worry about. What wasn’t normal was the cold, circular sensation on his forehead. He furrowed his brow to try and remove the strange sensation but it didn’t go away. When he opened his eyes his breath got caught in his chest. A sudden sense of fear shot through him.

Rick was awake. Rick was standing over him. Rick did not look pleased to see him. The cold sensation on his forehead revealed itself to be the barrel of Rick’s Colt Python revolver. His eyes met Rick’s glare and only moved to locate Carl, who was standing beside the couch behind Rick. He looked worried.

“Who are you?” Rick asked him gruffly.

Jason raised his hands in defence and submission. “My name’s Jason.”

“Carl may have let you in here.” Rick told him, his voice still gruff. “But he doesn’t make the decisions. I do.”

“Well, in his defence you were in no position to make any decisions.” Jason replied, trying to keep his tone calm and non-threatening.

Rick pulled back the hammer on his revolver, making sure the weapon was ready to fire. This sent a cold panic up Jason’s spine.

“He’s fourteen. He can’t read people, can’t be sure if they’re lying.” Rick told him with an icy tone. “I was a police officer before all this. I _can_ read people. If you try anything. _Anything._ I will kill you.”

Jason hesitated to speak. There were things he wanted to say but despite how calm he may have looked on the outside, he was trembling within. He could tell Rick wasn’t lying. He had the conviction to just pull the trigger right now. What a pathetic way to die that would be.

“Dad, I’m not a kid anymore. He’s okay. He…” Carl tried to interrupt but was silenced by his father.

“Quiet Carl. We need to be sure he’s not a threat.” Rick told him, glaring at Jason. “ _I_ need to be sure.”

Jason glanced at Carl. The boy’s eyes showed respect, trust but also a hint of fear. The fear was not of his father but the fear that the young man he had at gun point might do something. If that happened, Carl could lose his father, who was still badly injured, or he could lose this young man who comforted him when he needed it the most.

“Look mister, if I was such a threat, would we really be in this situation?” Jason asked him, hoping his last spark of confidence would not antagonise Rick.

“What do you mean?” Rick growled.

“If I wanted to kill you both I could have done it last night while you slept.” Jason explained. “I could have shot your son when I first met him but I didn’t. I helped him.”

Rick snarled at him. “Or you could be manipulative.”

Jason let out a frustrated growl. “Not everyone left in the world is bad. I’m not bad.”

“Where’s your group?” Rick asked him after a few moments.

“I don’t have one.” Jason admitted. “I’m alone.”

“Why?” Rick asked with a rasp.

“Our camp got overrun. I made it out with one other.” Jason told him, his heart rising to his throat. “Now it’s just me.”

“How long have you been alone?” Rick continued his interrogation.

“Six months.” Jason answered, his voice deeper, a sadness present in his tone.

“Dad, at least put the gun down.” Carl pleaded, feeling uncomfortable with the situation.

Rick turned his head to look at Carl through his undamaged eye and then back at Jason. He took a moment to think before he holstered his revolver.

Jason lowered his hands as well, feeling a little more relaxed now that Rick’s gun wasn’t staring him in the face.

“If you’re going to stay with us like Carl has suggested.” Rick told the young man below him. “Then you need to answer three questions.”

Jason nodded and smiled softly. “Sure.”

Rick rubbed his face, unsure of how he felt about the young man in front of him.

“How many walkers have you killed?” He asked the first key question.

“Too many to count.” Jason answered truthfully.

Rick nodded, expecting such an answer.

“How many people have you killed?” Rick asked, glaring at him this time.

Jason was silent for a moment. That question surprised him but it did make sense. He went through the people he had met since the world ended and mentally counted the individuals he had killed.

“Five.” Jason answered slowly and carefully.

Rick’s eyes narrowed. Carl face wore an expression of surprise. The boy obviously hadn’t expected Jason to be capable of killing.

“Why?” Rick asked in a rasp, reaching for the handle of his revolver again.

Jason lowered his gaze in pain. These were stories he did not want to have to tell but he knew he would have to if he was going to stay there without Rick shooting him.

“The first two were my parents.” He explained, rubbing his eyes at the memory. “They wanted to die together after my father had been bit.”

Jason looked up at Rick’s expressionless face and Carl’s look of sympathy.

“So I offered to put them both down together. A final act of love.” He finished, tears lurking in his eyes.

“The next two were murdering thieves. The worst kind of people.” Jason continued his story. “It was either them or me. I chose me. The first time I have ever killed in cold blood.”

“But in self-defence, right?” Carl asked quickly from behind Rick.

Jason nodded slowly. “Yeah, they left me no choice.”

“And the last person?” Rick asked him, still glaring.

Jason thought for a moment. He wanted to tell him but his emotions betrayed him. He couldn’t bring himself to speak. To say their name let alone explain what happened. What he had done. He simply shook his head.

“I don’t want to talk about that one.” He told Rick, his voice low. “Sorry.”

Rick took a step closer. “I _need_ to know.”

Jason finally stood up for the first time that morning, an inch or two shorter than Rick himself.

“No. You _don’t_.” He growled at the man. “I’m _not_ a killer. And I’m _not_ a threat to you or _your son_.”

He stepped past Rick and refused to look at Carl before heading for the staircase. If this man was going to keep picking at that wound then he would have to leave. Carl was asleep when he promised to protect him so it wouldn’t matter if he walked away. He wasn’t breaking any promises. He stormed up the stairs and into the room where his supplies were.

Rick studied his son. The boy looked conflicted, unsure of what to say or do, as if he had split loyalties. Rick knew that Carl understood that the young man’s outburst, his aggression over the subject of this secret fifth killing was a problem. At the same time Rick questioned his own judgement. Back at the prison, on the phone, he wasn’t comfortable talking about Lori for a long time. Was this the same kind of thing?

He walked back to the couch and carefully sat on the floor with his back resting against the couch. He winced as pain continued to shoot through his side and leg, though not as bad as two days previous. Rick looked up at Carl, who looked prepared to follow the young man up the stairs.

“Sit down.” He told his son, who stared back silently. “Carl. Sit down.”

Carl hesitated before doing as he was told and sat down on the floor next to his father. He was close to tears again and he wasn’t really sure why. He just stared ahead of him, refusing to look at his father in case the man saw the weakness in his eyes.

“You shouldn’t have risked it.” Rick told him gruffly. “Going out there like that. It’s dangerous.”

Carl turned his head to look at his father. “I was careful.”

Rick nodded. His son obviously had been careful because he was clearly unharmed. He would have argued that fact if Carl had told him about his two near-death experiences but from a mix of embarrassment and pride he refused to mention that to his father.

Rick looked at the bag of supplies on the floor. “Well, it’s good that you found more food.”

“I found even more.” Carl admitted as though confessing to a sin. “But I ate it.”

Rick turned to him, slightly surprised.

“What was it?” He asked out of curiosity.

Carl smiled in embarrassment. “One hundred and twelve ounces of pudding.”

This earned a smile and a shake of the head from Rick. Now it made sense.

“And you didn’t share it with him?” Rick asked, referring to the young man upstairs.

Carl shook his head slowly. “No. I offered but he didn’t want any. Said I deserved it.”

Rick nodded his head in understanding. Perhaps he had been harsh on the young man but he still found it hard to trust any strangers, especially now that it was just him and his son. He glanced at his son, his expression suddenly serious along with his tone of voice.

“I know…we’ll never get things back to the way they used to be.” He admitted to his son.

“What?” Carl asked, unsure of where this was coming from all of a sudden.

“I only clung to that for you…and Judith.” Rick hesitated. “Now she’s…gone.”

Carl lowered his gaze to the floor, the pain of losing his baby sister still stabbing his heart with a molten blade.

“And you. You’re a man, Carl.” Rick told his son with a mix of pride and guilt. “You’re a man and I’m sorry.”

Carl saw the pain in his father’s eyes. He feared that while in his short coma, Rick had heard his outburst. He needed to put it right.

“You don’t need to be.” He told his father with sincerity.

They both smiled to one another before Rick to a much needed drink of water. Carl stood up, which made Rick cast his gaze up to his son.

“Does he get to stay?” Carl asked.

Rick thought for a moment. He could tell this meant a lot to Carl though he couldn’t fathom why. Instead of invading his son’s private thoughts he decided to trust his judgement and nodded. Carl smiled with relief and charged up the stairs to give Jason the good news.

When he reached the bedroom he noticed the door was closed over slightly. Carl approached slowly and knocked on the door before opening it. The door opened to reveal Jason sitting on the bed, now wearing his jacket, gloves and holster and wiping away tears from his eyes. He wrote another mark in his small book with his pencil before preparing to put them away.

“Hey.” Carl announced his presence.

Jason looked up at him and rubbed his eyes quickly to hide the tears. “Hey, Carl.”

“My Dad says you can stay with us.” Carl told him. “If you want to that is.”

Jason smiled at the boy. “Yeah, I’d like to.” He replied. “Your dad is a good man, Carl.”

Carl nodded before catching sight of the small book.

“What do you write in that?” Carl asked, not realising the rudeness of such an innocent question.

Jason put the book away in his backpack before zipping it up and putting it round his shoulder. He walked over to the window to look out onto the street.

“I don’t write anything in it.” He told Carl. “I mark a tally.”

“A tally? You mean to keep count?” Carl asked, confused.

“Yeah.” Jason answered simply.

“Keep count of what? Days?” Carl asked, trying to make sense of it.

“Yeah. Days since it happened.” Jason answered, his voice low.

“Since all this started?” Carl asked.

“No.” Jason replied softly, the familiar lump in his throat forming again.

Carl was about to ask what it was. He guessed it would be the fifth killing but he couldn’t assume that. He needed to ask. Just as he was about to, there was a knock on the door downstairs.

Jason and Carl looked at each other with anxiety before heading down the stairs together as quietly as possible. Both of them had their handguns drawn and were aiming at the door as they reached the ground floor. Rick already had his revolver in his hand and was looking through the eyehole. He turned around and sat back down, his back resting against the door as he grinned from ear to ear, a light chuckle sounding.

Carl looked at his father in confusion, wondering what could make his dad laugh at a time like this.

“What?” He whispered anxiously.

Rick grinned at his son.

“It’s for you.”

Carl looked very confused with Jason being even more confused. Rick continued grinning and called out loudly to the person on the other side of the door.

“Go round the back.” He called. “Carl will let you in.”

Jason watched their shadow disappear from the porch as they made their way round the back. Carl rushed round to the back door and moved the makeshift barricade. As he waited for the individual to arrive, Jason stood by the kitchen doorway and kept his gun in hand just in case. Once a shadow was cast over the dirty glass of the back door Carl reached for the handle and opened it.

Standing in the doorway, with her clothes blood stained and dirty, her dreadlocks hanging around her head and her trademark samurai sword on her back was Michonne. Carl’s face lit up as he dropped his gun to the floor and jumped towards the black woman, wrapping his arms around her in a tight hug.

“It’s good to see you too.” Michonne laughed in joy at the boy’s reaction.

Carl’s reaction was all Jason needed to holster his gun yet again. He took in the sight of the woman in the doorway in an attempt to gauge who she was and what kind of person she was. Her clothing was stylish at least. Boots, jeans, some kind of vest like top with a sleeveless leather jacket over it and fingerless gloves. Preventing her dreadlocks from falling in front of her eyes was a bandanna, wrapped around the top of her forehead. The handle of the sword instantly caught his attention. No surprise that she had survived attacks from walkers when she could slice them up into bits.

Carl eventually released Michonne and let her in so the door could be closed and barricaded again. By this time, Rick had hobbled through to the kitchen and stood in the doorway beside Jason. He was still smiling, as was Carl and Michonne. Rick’s expression soon turned serious.

“I’m sorry, Michonne.” He apologised, addressing the woman. “If we had known you were alive, we wouldn’t have left.”

Michonne held one of her hands up to him.

“No, you did the right thing.” She told the injured man. “The prison is the last place anyone would want to be right now.”

Rick nodded and invited her through to the front room to sit on the couch, floor or armchair. Wherever she preferred. She chose the couch and Carl happily sat next to her. Rick took the armchair and Jason reserved himself to stand in the doorway, leaving his backpack at his feet.

“What happened?” Rick asked her, his voice low as he knew he didn’t truly want to hear the answer.

“After you took off looking for Carl, I went looking for the others.” She explained, leaning forward. “I couldn’t find anyone and you had disappeared.”

“We’re sorry. We weren’t thinking.” Rick apologised again. “We…we lost Judith.”

Carl lowered his head at this, prompting Michonne to rub his back affectionately with one hand.

“I told you. You did the right thing.” She repeated. “I took off into the woods and found a treehouse to spend the night in.”

Jason smirked slightly. No doubt the same one he had been in as it wasn’t far from the prison.

“I went back to the prison the next morning. It was still overrun.” Michonne continued.

“Why’d you go back?” Carl asked her quickly, as it had sounded like suicide.

Michonne lowered her gaze. “Hershel.”

She didn’t need to say anything else. Rick and Carl instantly understood that she had put herself in danger, walking through a horde of walkers in search of Hershel’s reanimated head so she could put him down out of mercy.

A sombre silence fell into the room. All of them were still grieving, leaving Jason at a loss of what to do or say. He decided to stay silent, as he didn’t know any of the people they had lost and felt it would be inappropriate to try and comfort any of them over it. It wasn’t his place.

“It was my fault. I should have kept looking.” Michonne finally broke the silence, staring at the floor.

Carl raised his hand and placed it on her shoulder, causing the woman to turn to look at him.

“It was him. Just him.” He told her, referring to the Governor.

“He’s right.” Rick quickly supported Carl’s comment. The blame game wouldn’t help any of them at this point. The past was the past. They had to focus on survival.

Jason kept his eyes on the interaction between Carl and Michonne. There was a lot of affection between the two of them. He reminded himself that their history belonged to them and he shouldn’t stare so much.

Michonne noticed the head movement from Jason and turned her attention to him. She studied his appearance. Boots, cargos, stylish leather jacket, leather fingerless gloves, blue eyes and messy brown hair. She could tell he used to style his hair but the days of that are long gone. He looked young, only a few years older than Carl at most. She didn’t recognise him.

She nudged Carl with her shoulder and gestured to Jason. “Who’s the aviator?”

Carl looked confused, not understanding where the aviator came from but quickly realised who she was referring to. He hesitated, not sure how to explain to her who he was. Who really was he? Was he a friend yet?

Rick cut in, noticing Carl’s hesitation. “Carl’s new friend. Kept him safe while I was out cold.”

Michonne’s gaze moved from Rick back to Jason, studying the young man again.

Jason shifted his feet and looked at the floor.

“Hardly” he finally spoke up. “As if a tough guy like Carl needs any help from me.”

Carl wasn’t sure how to feel about his remark. It was true that he didn’t really help with any of the walkers except to get his shoe back. However, Carl had needed him the night before. He had been a source of comfort, a surprise one at that which had allowed Carl to feel safe enough to cry himself to sleep. He would have stayed there had Rick not woken up first and pulled him from the embrace.

Michonne smiled at his modesty. She was a good judge of character and she didn’t receive any bad vibes from the young man.

“So what’s your story?” Michonne asked him directly. “You must have done something for Rick to respect you so quickly.”

Jason shifted in place slightly, not enjoying being the centre of attention of three people who all knew each other intimately.

“I rescued Carl’s shoe.” Jason said with a laugh, which provoked an identical laugh from Carl. It wasn’t a lie.

He stopped laughing and stared back at Michonne, his hands in the pockets of his leather jacket.

“I lost everyone I knew six months ago.” He explained. “Been on my own until I met Carl the other day.”

Michonne nodded. Though Rick didn’t trust Jason completely yet, she could relate to him. Until she had met Andrea she too had been alone for months with just her pet walkers for company. Rick hadn’t trusted her either. She realised they appeared to have a lot in common, even a connection to Carl.

Rick let out a grunt of pain and held his hand up to the cuts on his face and forehead. Michonne observed the injuries before speaking up.

“You should get those cleaned.” She told him, earning a nod from the man. “Do we have anything that could be used to clean the wounds?”

Carl shrugged, looking in his supply bag. “Just water and some cloths.”

“That will have to do for now.” Michonne commented. “Until I go out on a run.”

Jason stepped forward and kneeled down in front of Rick, searching his backpack.

“Don’t bother.” He told them. “I have a few things that should help.”

They all watched him as he pulled out a small bottle of disinfectant alcohol and a couple cotton pads. He gently poured some alcohol onto one of the cotton pads and lifted it up to Rick’s face.

“I’m warning you now.” He told the man. “This is going to hurt like hell.”

Rick nodded and prepared himself for the pain he was about to endure.

Jason dabbed the cotton pad onto Rick’s face, cleaning each wound as carefully as he could. Rick grunted and winced in pain but for the most part held still. Jason cleaned each wound as slowly and carefully as possible, taking as much time as necessary. Rick’s reactions to the pain subsided with time as the pain of the alcohol began to fade. However, as soon as Jason dabbed a new cotton pad on the large gash on Rick’s forehead the man let out a gasp of pain and gripped the arm of the armchair so hard his knuckles turned white.

“Sorry.” Jason apologised quickly, dabbing it again and earning yet another sound of pain.

“It’s alright.” Rick muttered, still wincing.

When he was done, both cotton pads were soaked with a mix of blood and alcohol. Rick’s face looked much cleaner and the wounds appeared smaller as a result of the dried blood being washed off. The wounds continued to sting as the alcohol went to work but at least there was less chance of an infection.

Jason tossed the cotton pads into the bin that sat by the kitchen door and put the bottle of alcohol back in his backpack, zipping it up. He placed his bag back into the corner of the room and sat against the wall beside it.

Jason observed how close Carl sat to Michonne. How all three of them seemed happy together, almost like a family. It was clear that Michonne was a friend and not his mother but there was a clear bond. An emptiness crept up on him. He missed the embrace he had shared with the boy the night before, his first time being close to someone, anyone, for just over six months. Now it looked like he would have to wait another six months for anything like that to happen again. He tilted his head back and banged it against the wall, unintentionally getting everyone’s attention. Realising this, he spoke up.

“So…what’s the plan?” He asked as an open question to the room.

“I don’t know…” Rick admitted with a heavy breath.

“We could stay here for a while, right?” Carl asked, his gaze shifting between Michonne and his father.

“At least until your dad has fully recovered.” Michonne agreed with a smile and sat back on the couch.

“Then we should check the rest of these houses for supplies.” Jason told them, standing up. “Most look like they were evacuated in the early days, should still have some things.”

There was a unanimous agreement to the plan. The following day they would organise supply runs around the neighbourhood while Rick recuperated. Then they would set off and try to find some of their group from the prison, providing anyone else had even survived.

Jason sighed and stood up. He didn’t feel comfortable in the front room with the three of them. He felt like the odd one out and opted to stay that way for the time being. He grabbed his backpack and started heading for the staircase but Rick stood up and called out for him to stop. He stopped.

“Jason.” He said calmly. “Can we talk for a moment?”

Jason nodded and followed Rick through to one of the back rooms and closed the door behind them so Michonne and Carl couldn’t hear them.

Rick’s glare intensified as he looked into Jason’s eyes.

“What happened last night?” He asked coldly.

“What do you mean?” Jason asked, hoping to play it stupid.

“You know what I mean.” Rick retorted. “Why were you sleeping together?”

Jason had to quickly deflect the colloquial meaning of that phrase from his mind and focus on the literal meaning of Rick’s question. He realised it must have been strange for Rick to find Carl cuddled into the chest of a stranger.

“He thought you had turned. It was hard to tell in the darkness.” Jason explained, hesitating with every couple words. “He was scared and crying, so I put an arm around him for comfort.”

Rick glared at him, expecting a longer explanation.

“As soon as I did, he cuddled into my chest.” Jason explained, still hesitating. “So I embraced him and comforted him. It felt like the right thing to do.”

Rick took a step closer to the younger man, his glare and slightly taller build intimidating to Jason.

“You didn’t _touch_ him, did you?” Rick hissed.

“What?” Jason asked as a reflex before quickly correcting himself. “No! No, of course not! I’m not like that. I swear!”

Rick narrowed his eyes and nodded slowly. “Good. But if you’re lying. If you touch him. I’ll gut you. You got that?”

Jason swallowed nervously, Rick’s intimidating glare and threats had actually caused him to sweat from anxiety. He nodded furiously.

“Got it.” He confirmed, hands shaking. “But I swear I would _never_ do that. I promise.”

“Good.” Rick replied and backed off.

The injured man opened the door and hobbled back through to the front room where Michonne and Carl were waiting. Michonne sensed something had happened as it was rare for Rick to pull someone aside like that. Carl knew something had happened by the sweat on Jason’s brow that hadn’t been there before.

Jason headed straight up the stairs like he had attempted to before his chat with Rick. Carl’s eyes followed the young man before he disappeared from view and then landed on his father. Had his dad said something to hurt the young man? Had he changed his mind about him staying? A strange feeling of panic set in. He didn’t know Jason but he didn’t want to see him go either. He got up from the couch and followed the young man up the stairs, leaving Michonne and Rick alone.

When he reached the bedroom Jason had been using, there was no sign of him. His backpack was on the bed but Jason was nowhere to be seen.

“Jason?” Carl called out, looking around.

“Out here.” Jason answered. He was out on the roof.

Carl climbed through the open window and sat on the slate next to young man. He stared at Jason’s face, trying to read the emotions that were being expressed. Jason was staring out at the empty street.

“What’s up?” Jason asked the boy, finally turning to look at him.

As soon as Jason’s eyes fell on Carl the younger boy quickly averted his gaze to the street, trying not to be caught staring.

Carl shrugged at first, watching as the leaves blew down the street.

“What did my dad say to you?” He finally asked, unsure of his question. “You looked upset.”

“It was nothing.” Jason lied, looking away. “Don’t worry about it.”

“Jason.” Carl growled, making the young man look back at him. “I’m not a kid. Stop treating me like one.”

Jason sighed and scratched his head, patting his hair into position.

“You’re right, Carl. You’re not a kid.” He stated.

Jason hesitated.

“Your…your dad just doesn’t want me hurting you.” He admitted. “He got a scare this morning.”

This confused Carl. How was a hug supposed to hurt him?

“What do you mean?” He asked, his naivety showing.

Jason sighed. This wasn’t going to be an easy discussion.

“Carl…some people before the apocalypse...some adults would…hurt kids in a sexual way.” He explained with great hesitation. “Exploit them, abuse them, and manipulate them. They were predators.”

Carl thought for a moment, the very thought of such people making his stomach churn. No wonder his dad was worried, he guessed his dad had encountered such people at work before the apocalypse.

“But you’re not like that, right?” Carl asked bluntly, needing to know the truth, no matter what it was.

Jason reeled his head back in disgust. “God no! I’d never do something like that to anyone!”

“Good.” Carl answered, getting up and walking back to the window. “Because you give good hugs.”

With that said, Carl disappeared back into the house leaving Jason alone with his thoughts. Did he just hear that right? Carl accepted what he had done the night before. He had enjoyed the closeness. He let out a sigh of relief and smiled, lying back on the roof to stare up at the sky yet again.

 

**Well, there’s chapter 2 finished. This turned out longer and better than I had planned. Like I said, this story is writing itself. I hope I’m keeping everyone in character and giving a decent mix of positive and negative feelings.**

**Please leave a review if you have got this far down. I like lengthy reviews, let me know what you like, what you don’t like and what your predictions are. All of these things help me as a writer and galvanize me to get chapters written faster. ^^**

**A thank you goes out to Hunter Ark; *bruh intensifies* and the couple of guests who reviewed chapter 1. As a result, I wrote this one in a day.**


	3. Everlasting Nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carl and Jason have an argument before Jason goes on a supply run with Michonne. After a close-call, Michonne gives him some important advice.

_Screams echoed loudly around the neighbourhood. Sirens from emergency vehicles were blaring with the vehicles themselves casting blue and red light into the dark street. In the sky above, helicopters roared overheard. Smoke filled the sky as cars and houses had caught fire and were quickly burning to the ground. The emergency services were overwhelmed by the threat that faced them. A horde of undead corpses, dead people, were attacking the neighbourhood and appeared to be immortal. The police officers there fired their weapons with deadly accuracy, striking the heart, lungs, and kneecaps of these assailants but nothing seemed to slow them down. The time wasted shooting the bodies allowed the cannibalistic corpses to advance upon them and tear into them, ripping their chest cavities open and killing the officers._

_All around, people either stood their ground, with most of them quickly becoming overwhelmed by the monstrosities, or they ran as fast as they could. Many ran for safety, others tried to use their cars to escape but in the panic many of these cars crashed into one another, sending shards of glass spraying into the street and sounding the car horns. These horns acted like dinner bells for the doomed families inside._

_Further down the street, a shot fired loudly as one of the corpses fell to the ground. One of the few people who had decided to shot them in the head and discover the weakness. Jason pumped the chamber of the Benelli M4 shotgun in his hands, discharging the bullet case and kept the gun aimed in front of him. The man who he had saved quickly ran past him and back into the house. More of the undead monsters approached Jason, groaning hungrily for fresh meat but with a pull of the trigger Jason blasted their brains out onto the street. He stepped back inside the house and slammed the door behind him._

_“Dad, you okay?” He asked the man who he had saved, walking into the front room._

_He first caught sight of his mother, whose face was occupied with worry and appeared to be turning pale. His father, a taller man with grey hair turned to face his son and revealed the bite on his arm._

_“I’m sorry son.” He apologised, understanding what the bite meant. “I was careless.”_

_Jason dropped the shotgun to the floor and grabbed his father’s arm, examining the bite._

_“Maybe…maybe you won’t become one of those things.” He suggested, clinging to hope._

_His father shook his head. “Jason, you know that’s nonsense.”_

_Jason felt tears stinging his eyes which came bursting through when he saw the pain on his mother’s face. He tried to wipe his tears away for a moment._

_“So what do we do?” He asked, feeling like a helpless child._

_“Pack your things and then guard the house.” His father told him, not letting the gravity of the situation bring him down. “I’ll tell Kellin to do the same.”_

_Jason nodded, his tears falling from his face to the floor._

_“What are you going to do?” He asked, looking up at his father in desperation._

_“I’m going to take your mother upstairs.” His father told him. “When the time is right, I will call on you.”_

_Jason seemed confused but nodded and let them go upstairs. He started gathering supplies together and stuffing them in his backpack, keeping the shotgun close to him at all times. He also made sure to close the blinds so that none of the undead freaks outside noticed them and started pounding at the doors or windows. With all the screaming, sirens, gunshots and chaos outside, he doubted many of the creatures would be interested in his house anyway._

_A young man came down the stairs behind him, a couple years younger than Jason. His blonde hair still in place and a bag around his shoulder. He looked terrified and deeply worried._

_“What the hell is happening?” He asked, his voice quivering._

_“Some kind of virus, I guess.” Jason answered, drawing on his biology studies. “Those infected attack those who aren’t.”_

_The younger man sat down on the floor and held his knees in his arms, rocking himself back and forth. He couldn’t imagine the horror unfolding outside and the screams that echoed from the street tore at his heart. Those poor people._

_Jason knelt down in front of him, his hands on the younger man’s shoulders._

_“Kellin, hey.” He got their attention. “We’re going to get through this. I promise.”_

_Kellin nodded, trusting Jason’s optimism and determination._

_Suddenly Jason’s father shouted for him to come to the bedroom. He left Kellin in the front room and ascended the stairs. Once at the top, he knocked on his parents’ bedroom door before opening it slowly. Lying on their bed, hand in hand, were Jason’s parents and they were wearing their wedding clothes._

_“Son, I don’t want to become one of those freaks.” His father told him. “And your mother and I have decided we won’t live without the other.”_

_Jason’s tears began to flow from his eyes yet again. His voice shook as he questioned their decision._

_“What are you saying?” He asked them, fear and grief growing inside of him._

_“Look at the table beside you.” His father told him calmly._

_Jason turned his head and observed the small black table that sat next to the door. On top of it was a telephone which was always there but two new items had also been placed there. A set of car keys and a Beretta 92FS handgun._

_“Take the keys and take our car.” His father told him. “You need to get to safety.”_

_Jason grabbed the keys and pocketed them._

_“What about you two?” He asked, tears still flowing._

_“Jason, honey, we both love you more than you’ll ever know.” His mother spoke up. “But we can’t come with you. We want to die together.”_

_“How can you expect me to just leave you both here?” Jason asked, raising his voice. “To abandon you?”_

_“You won’t be abandoning us.” His father told him. “Take the gun too.”_

_Jason took the gun, his hand shaking from a combination of emotion and the weight of the weapon._

_“We’re going to take some pills.” His father told him. “We will slip away in our sleep.”_

_Jason nodded, forcing himself to keep standing even though he wanted to collapse and cry._

_“When that happens, shoot us both in the head.” His father gave his last request._

_“What? Why?” Jason spoke back, shocked._

_“I’ve been bitten, I don’t want to risk coming back.” His father retorted. “And I don’t want that to happen to your mother either.”_

_Jason dropped the gun to the floor and burst into tears. He walked over to his parents’ bedside and held his parents close. His mother kissed his forehead, whispering words of love and promising that he will always be her baby boy. His father shook his hand and declared not only his undying love for his son but also is extreme pride._

_With the heartfelt goodbyes said and done, they both swallowed their pills down with some wine and lay back in bed holding hands. Jason stood and waited, still crying but he had to honour their dying wishes. Once they had stopped breathing, he raised the Beretta in a shaky hand and fired two shots as promised._

_They were in a better place. Away from this everlasting nightmare._

Jason awoke and felt like just rolling over and going back to sleep. He was really enjoying getting to sleep in a bed again and also feel safe at the same time. He was with other people for the first time in six months. He didn’t always have to keep watch or sleep with one eye open. Jason felt a hand on his shoulder and opened his eyes, looking up to see Rick peering down at him.

“No gun to my head this time, Rick?” Jason joked, smiling up at the man. “I’m disappointed.”

“Dare go back to sleep and I’ll use it.” Rick joked back. “That’s a promise.”

Jason chuckled and rubbed his eyes before yawning and stretching his limbs. He wriggled his toes and remembered that he had also slept without his boots on for the first time in weeks. He lifted the covers off and swung his legs over the side of the bed. He slipped his feet inside his boots and bent over to tie the laces.

“I’m going down to set up breakfast and mark a supply route.” Rick told him. “Do me a favour and wake Carl.”

Jason continued tightening his shoes and didn’t look up. “Sure thing, Rick.”

Rick smiled gently and left the room, heading back down the stairs. He still had a limp and the pain in his side wasn’t going away any time soon. Outside it was sunny again and without any noticeable walkers. This truly was a peaceful, isolated little neighbourhood.

Jason lifted his notebook out of his bag and marked a new tally with his pencil. He sighed, counting the tallies in his head. One hundred and ninety. He put the book away and zipped his bag up. He slipped his fingerless gloves on and put on his jacket but he didn’t zip it up, leaving it open for a change. His holster clipped around his waist with a sharp click. Leaving his bag in the room, he left the bedroom and headed for the room Carl was sleeping in. As he passed by the doors, he noticed Michonne was already up. He guessed she was naturally an early riser.

Jason opened the door slowly, letting the morning light flood in and descend upon Carl’s sleeping form, curled up in the bed. He stood in the doorway and called out.

“Carl? Carl, time to get up!” He told the boy, who appeared to shift slightly in the bed.

He entered the room and placed a hand on the boy’s shoulder, just as Rick had done to him.

“Rise and shine, sleepy head.” Jason continued in his efforts to wake him.

Carl moved. He was awake but simply rolled over, ignoring the older boy at his bedside.

“5 more minutes.” He grumbled from under the covers.

“Sorry, no can do.” Jason answered. “Get up before I make you.”

Carl stayed as he was. Jason decided to make good on his threat and pulled the covers off the boy. His hands descended to the boy’s sides and started tickling him, earning him instant giggles from Carl along with waving arms and legs that acted in a weak defence. Carl couldn’t stop his giggling. No one but his parents knew he was this ticklish and as a result no one had ever tried. Now here was Jason, the stranger turned friend that he had met two days previous standing at his bedside tickling his sides with expert speed and pressure.

Carl gasped for breath between giggles. “Okay…okay…I’ll get up…stop!”

Jason ceased his attack and returned his hands to the pockets of his cargos. He smiled down at the boy who lay before him, his hair dishevelled and his face red from laughing.

“Can’t say I didn’t warn you.” Jason told him with a chuckle.

Carl glared up at him. “I’ll get you back for that.” He threatened.

Jason laughed, heading for the door. “You’ll try.”

Once Jason disappeared downstairs, Carl remained sat up in bed for a few moments, alone with his thoughts. No one had ever woken him up like that before in his life. He wasn’t complaining, he had enjoyed the playful interaction. In two days Jason had been more physically close to him than most people at the prison except for his parents and Beth on occasion. The prison. He felt his heart sank. Had anyone else survived? There must have been a few at least. He hoped. His breathing had returned to normal but his face was still warm and red. Carl took his time getting ready before going downstairs so the colour would fade from his cheeks.

By the time Carl had made it down to the kitchen, the other three were half way through breakfast. They didn’t seem to be talking much, each individual keeping to their thoughts. Jason’s face was the first to light up upon Carl’s entrance. Rick and Michonne quickly followed suit as Carl pulled the fourth and final chair out from under the table and poured some cereal into a bowl. He ate while the others began to plan the day.

“We should start with the closest houses.” Rick suggested. “So it’s not far if things go wrong.”

Michonne and Jason appeared to silently agree as Carl continued to eat.

“I’ll take Jason with me.” Rick declared which received a double take from Jason.

“Rick, you’re not strong enough.” Jason told him.

“Excuse me?” Rick challenged.

“I saw the colour of your side.” Jason explained. “You need to rest.”

Michonne nodded alongside Jason. “Rick, he’s right. Jason and I can handle it.”

Rick said nothing, his gaze switching back and forth from Michonne and Jason. He felt like a child. Weak and helpless. Useless. A burden. He wanted to argue that he was well enough to take down a couple walkers but experience told him they weren’t the only danger lurking in the world outside.

“You need to get better, Rick.” Jason told him, standing up. “Carl needs you. Don’t throw your life away.”

Jason zipped up his jacket and checked his gun, making sure it was clean and operational before holstering it and heading for the kitchen door.

“Where are you going?” Rick asked him, knowing that what the young man had said was true. He needed to stay around Carl. To protect him.

Jason looked at the three of them over his shoulder as he stood in the doorway of the kitchen.

“I’m going on a supply run.” Jason declared. “I’ll be back soon.”

“You’re not going out there alone.” Rick warned.

“I can handle myself. I managed for six months.” He retorted. “You all need to rest, especially you, Rick. For your boy.”

Before anyone else could respond Jason headed back up the stairs to grab his backpack from the bedroom. While there he checked its contents for spare ammo, a couple spare knives and other supplies. He took a drink of water from the bottle he always kept in the bag before zipping it all back up and turned back to leave. He stopped. Carl stood in the doorway, his sheriff hat firmly sitting on his head.

“You’re not going alone.” Carl told him, standing up the young man like he had done with his father before. “I’m coming with you.”

Jason walked up to Carl, attempting to walk past him but the fourteen year old wouldn’t move from where he stood. He stared down at the younger boy.

“No. You’re not.” He told Carl. “Your dad needs you. Can’t risk anything happening to you.”

“But we can risk something happening to you?” Carl spat back.

“Yes, you can. I survived alone. I’m the second youngest here.” Jason told him, frustration lacing his tone. “And I’m the new guy. At least if something happens to me it won’t be as bad.”

Carl felt that statement stab at his heart. Is that what Jason truly believed? That because he was the new guy in the group that his life wasn’t worth as much as the rest of them. His dad was forbidden from going on runs because Carl needed him. So why was Jason allowed to go? Carl couldn’t let him just walk out like that but he also knew he couldn’t really stop him.

Jason realised that he shouldn’t have said that last statement. He placed his hands on Carl’s shoulders softly. For a boy with so much pain even now he displayed such strength.

“Carl? You’re a good person. You care about people.” He told the boy. “That’s why you’re worried about me. But you don’t need to be.”

“If something happened, we’d never know.” Carl replied, looking down. “You’d just…never come back.”

A pang of guilt struck Jason. He hadn’t truly realised how attached Carl was getting to him. He originally thought it was only because Rick had been in a minor coma and Michonne was presumed dead. Both were alive and awake yet Carl hadn’t pushed him away. He was torturing the boy but insisting that he should risk his life alone.

“I’ll come back. I promise.” Jason told the teen.

“How can you be sure?” Carl asked him. No one could be sure of anything anymore.

“Because I’ll go with him.” Michonne’s voice called from the top of the stairs.

Jason looked up at the samurai. He sighed. This was one battle he wasn’t going to win. He let his tensed shoulders fall in defeat and nodded.

“Okay, we’ll go together.” He accepted.

With this declaration Carl let him past so he could head down the stairs. Once Jason had disappeared from view, Carl gazed over to Michonne from under his hat.

“Thanks.” He said softly before looking down again.

Michonne winked at him before following the young man down the stairs.

Carl walked back into the bedroom and stood by the window to watch them set off on their run. He hoped they would come back safe and sound. The neighbourhood was quiet and with any luck it would stay that way.

 

Jason and Michonne walked down the street. He led her past the houses that Carl had already raided and headed for the untouched buildings. He kept his hands on his gun and knife at all times in case anything happens. Michonne followed silently, confident in the knowledge that she could get to her sword in a second if she needed to. The sun blazed down from above, unrelenting in its assault as the cool breeze blew many of the leaves that decorated the street out of place. The only noise was that of the vegetation blowing in the wind and the birds that called it home. Michonne increased her pace so that she walked beside the young man.

“You shouldn’t be so reckless.” She warned him, referring to his desire to go alone.

“There’s a difference between being reckless and being confident.” He answered, not used to being told he couldn’t do things his way.

“And the similarity is that they both can get you killed.” She countered.

Jason didn’t answer her. They had reached the closest unchecked house and made their way up to the front porch. He pulled out his handgun and stood on the opposite side of the door from Michonne, who had pulled out her sword and held it at the ready. Jason didn’t say a word but counted down from three with his fingers.

At zero, he moved in front of the door and gave it a strong kick, splintering the lock and forcing the door to swing open, slamming against the wall behind it. He instantly aimed his gun into the front room of the house and stepped in, his eyes and aim scanning every corner for a potential threat. He could smell death. There was a walker in the house somewhere. He slammed his fist against the wall three times to try and draw it out but the walker never came. Jason glanced at Michonne, both of them wondering why it wasn’t stumbling out towards the noise. He walked through the front room, checking the floor but couldn’t see anything suspicious. The further into the house that they walked the louder the gasps and snarls of the walker became and the more repelling the smell became.

Rounding the corner they came to the kitchen. The sounds and smell of the walker grew ever stronger but there was still no visual sign of its existence. They followed the sounds it was making, Michonne with her katana in hand and Jason with his handgun guiding his movements. They came to the pantry door and saw it vibrate as something banged against it. The walker was inside.

Jason shook his head and turned to Michonne. “Typical. The one place we really need to look.”

“At least it’s just the one.” Michonne commented, raising her sword.

“Should be pretty weak too.” Jason added, reaching for the handle.

He turned to Michonne. “Ready?”

Michonne nodded quickly and Jason opened the pantry door, jumping back as he did so. The walker burst out of the pantry faster than expected. It was stronger and fresher than Jason had predicted. As he jumped back his leg caught against a chair, forcing him off balance and causing him to crash to the floor, his gun falling from his hand as his reflexes tried to prevent his fall. The walker charged towards him and dropped down on top of him. He shouted in panic and quickly grabbed the walker’s shoulders, holding it as high above him as he could. Despite his physical strength, the weight of the walker was making his arm muscles burn. If he didn’t act fast his arms would give way and the walker would give him a painful kiss of death. Before he could act, a long blade was shoved through the walker’s temple, killing it and causing the body to go limp. Jason rolled the body off him as the blade was retracted.

He stood up and grabbed his gun before looking at Michonne, splatters of blood dripping from the tip of her sword.

“Thanks.” He gasped out, getting his breath back.

Michonne sheathed her sword for the time being and walked into the pantry, covering his mouth and nose from the assault of the disgusting stench of rotting flesh that had built up inside. They were in luck, the pantry had plenty of canned foods, cereals and other miscellaneous supplies. Both she and Jason took what they could and placed them in their respective bags.

“This was more than I expected to find.” Jason commented.

“We can go back early if you want.” Michonne suggested. “This is more than enough.”

“I want to check upstairs first.” Jason answered, heading for the staircase without waiting for the samurai.

“Jason!” She called to him, stepping out of the pantry. “You need to be more careful.”

“Why? I do fine.” He replied. “I’m still alive, aren’t I?”

“You need to be careful for Carl.” She told him. She could read that boy better than his own father could most of the time. His concern for Jason had not gone unnoticed.

“He’s a strong kid.” Jason deflected the subject. “He doesn’t need me.”

Michonne jogged ahead of him and blocked his path up the stairs, standing a couple steps up so that she towered over him.

“That’s not why he needs you.” She hissed. “He needs you because he has lost too many people already.”

Jason didn’t answer. He remembered the state of the prison.

“As far as he’s concerned, as far as we’re concerned…” Michonne told him coldly. “He just lost over twenty people. Don’t make him go through anymore heartbreak than he already has.”

Jason’s eyes widened. He hadn’t expected it to be over twenty. At that point his own losses seemed pathetic in comparison. Hardly noteworthy. Carl held onto him because he was scared to lose someone else. It didn’t matter who. Carl cared, not because he was necessarily special or important but because he was still alive.

“I see the pain in your eyes.” Michonne told him, breaking him from his thoughts.

Jason stared back at her, looking right into her eyes. Despite how expressionless her face was at that moment he saw something in her eyes. A flicker that betrayed her stoic appearance.

“And I see the pain in yours.” Jason answered lowly.

Michonne stood aside slowly, allowing Jason to ascend up the staircase. The two of them in that moment had come to a new understanding. They had both lost something precious, someone precious. They didn’t need to say who. They weren’t at that stage yet. Respect had been gained.

Michonne followed Jason up the stairs. The first room they encountered had the door closed. Jason readied his gun and Michonne unsheathed her sword. Just like before, Jason swung the door open and stepped back, aiming into the room with his eyes rapidly scanning for any danger. The sight that met his eyes almost made him drop his gun.

Lying in the bed, tucked under the covers and with their hands still intertwined, were two corpses. They were a man and a woman, dressed in their wedding clothes by what could be made out under the dirt. Evidence of insects littered the bed from previous stages of decomposition. Just like his parents, this couple had chosen to end it together. Just like his parents, someone had shot them in the head to prevent reanimation, the dark, dried bloodstains had recolored the pillows their heads rested on. On the bed below their hands was a note. Slowly and carefully, he picked it up and brushed off the dirt and insect remains.

“Jim, with endless love we left you sleeping. Now we’re sleeping with you. Don’t wake up.”

Though these people had no connection to him whatsoever and that it was clear that their son, Jim, never did wake up to read their note, Jason felt tears falling from his eyes. He placed the note back where he found it and left the room, pushing Michonne out with him. He closed the door behind them and leaned back against it. His legs gave way and he slid down the door until he was sat on the floor, dropping his gun from his hand and onto the floor beside him.

Michonne crouched down next to him, studying his expression and his tear stained eyes. She didn’t say anything, she just waited for an explanation.

“I…I was with my parents when all this started.” Jason slowly explained, trying desperately to control his breathing. “One night, a herd of those…things…entered the town. The police and the residents didn’t stand a chance.”

Jason paused for a moment, his emotions threatening to get the better of him but he fought them off to continue his story.

“My father was a cop. He had worked out how to kill them.” He continued. “We were trying to secure our front gate so they wouldn’t get in. One came out of the darkness…”

Jason’s shoulders shuddered as the tears began to fall.

“He didn’t see it in time. It bit him in the arm, took a chunk right out of him before he shot it.” Jason continued, gasping between sobs. “We…we got back inside. We were safe.”

Jason lowered his gaze to the floor, the sounds, smells and sights from that awful night coming back to him.

“The poor families outside saved us from the worst of it. Their screams attracted them.” Jason continued, remembering it vividly. “God, the screams.”

Michonne placed a hand on his shoulder but he didn’t react, as if he couldn’t feel it.

“My parents made a decision. They would take some pills and die together.” Jason explained. “Their dying wish was that I shoot them in the head, so they wouldn’t come back.”

Jason broke down, the tears thundering from his eyes as he fought to hold them back but found that he no longer could.

“I shot my parents. I shot my own parents.” He gasped out. “I’m sorry you have to see this.”

Michonne rubbed his shoulder. “I’ve been there. Don’t ever be sorry.”

Jason nodded, accepting her words and tried to slow his breathing. It took him a few minutes but he eventually managed to calm himself down and dry his eyes. He holstered his gun and stood up again.

“You should let Rick and Carl know these things.” Michonne advised. “Especially Carl. Let him in.”

“I don’t think he’s too impressed with me right now.” Jason commented with a sad smile.

 “If you want to make this morning up to him, find him some comics.” She told him before she started tying up her bag.

Jason nodded and searched the rooms, hoping to find a young teen boy’s room in the house. He opened the final door and smiled. He was in luck.

 

Rick groaned in pain as he pulled off his torn and blooded shirt. It used to be green but now it was practically brown with patches of dark crimson. His side was still agony and even more so when performing complex tasks such as getting dressed or undressed. He dropped it to the floor, making a mental note to get it later as he searched the wardrobe of one of the bedrooms. Some clothes had fortunately been left behind and some of them were in his size. Rick grabbed a white shirt from the wardrobe and lamented its colouration. This shirt would not stay white for long. With a wheeze of pain he struggled to put the shirt on but with a bit of patience and careful manoeuvring he managed to do so. It was refreshing to not have to wear his ripped and blooded shirt from the prison anymore. He walked over to the window and looked out at the street which was as empty and quiet as ever.

“They’ve been gone a while.” Carl’s voice sounded from the doorway.

“I’m sure they’re fine.” Rick answered with a pained breath.

“But what if they’re not?” Carl asked with concern. “What do we do if they’re not?”

Rick turned to his son. He never used to worry this much back at the prison when Michonne went out on her own.

“Carl. Have you heard any shots?” Rick asked his son, who shook his head. “Then they’re fine.”

Rick hobbled over to his son and placed a hand on his shoulder. His thigh still ached from the bullet wound though he was fortunate that the bullet had gone straight through without shattering. He stared into his son’s eyes that were still etched with grief and worry.

“I’m…I’m sorry Carl.” Rick apologised out of the blue. “I didn’t stop him. I couldn’t save everyone. Couldn’t save…Judith.”

Carl’s eyes welled up from the tears that were gathering in his eyes and hugged his father, being careful not to put pressure on his injured side. Rick looked down at the boy and stroked his hair gently.

“I miss them all so much.” Carl sobbed into his father’s chest.

Rick felt the familiar lump of grief rising in his throat and held his son close to him.

“Me too, Carl. Me too.” He answered softly.

Carl managed to calm down slightly though he refused to release himself from the embrace. His voice was muffled against his father’s chest when he spoke next.

“Jason’s one of us. I know you don’t trust him.” Carl said into his father’s chest. “But he’s one of us. He has to be.”

Rick thought for a moment. It was true that he didn’t trust Jason much. He knew there were plenty of things that the young man refused to tell them and his willingness to go out alone as if he was expendable worried Rick. However, his son was the first to meet him and it was obvious that the boy cared for Jason. Carl had already lost so much that Rick couldn’t find it within himself to take anything else away from his son. He slowly nodded and rubbed Carl’s back.

“He’s one of us.” He said, repeating his son’s words. “He’s one of us.”

There were still questions that plagued Carl’s mind. He didn’t fully understand why he had become attached to the strange new member of their group so quickly. Thinking back to the morning he realised how little faith he had shown to Jason by assuming he wouldn’t survive a supply run on his own. Jason had been on his own for six months before meeting Carl and had no doubt done plenty of supply runs alone. He would know what to do. Know how to be careful. Carl’s lack of faith was the equivalent of spitting in his face. He suddenly felt very guilty. Had it been lack of faith or had it been genuine concern? After what happened at the prison he was so scared to lose anyone else that he cared about. Would he have been as opposed to Michonne going alone? He wasn’t sure. He needed someone to talk to. Someone who could explain his feelings and settle his confusion.

“Hey, dad, how do you…” Carl started to ask the question but then remembered what Jason had told him. Rick hadn’t trusted the embrace and had threatened him should he get physically close to Carl.

“How do I what?” Rick asked the boy, releasing them from the embrace to look into his son’s eyes.

Carl knew that Rick had only meant his threat applied should Jason be one of those sexual predators he had been told about. He knew Jason wasn’t one of them. He couldn’t be. Yet he couldn’t understand why he suddenly felt very uneasy with talking to his father about this. About his feelings. His father had just declared Jason to be one of the group, he didn’t want to put that back into any form of doubt in his dad’s mind.

“Never mind.” Carl surrendered. “It doesn’t matter.”

Rick knew that it did matter but for reasons unknown his son had decided not to confide in him. Though he was slightly hurt by this fact he reminded himself that Carl was a teenager now. There would be things he wouldn’t always feel comfortable talking about. He chose not to invade his son’s privacy and let the subject drop.

Rick turned to look back out of the window and was greeting with a pleasant sight. Jason and Michonne were now visible and were returning to the house. Michonne’s back appeared to be full as did Jason’s. Their run appeared to have been more than just successful and the time alone together had let them bond some more, evident by the smiles on their faces as they spoke. Rick turned back to his son.

“I told you they were fine.” He declared with a smile, earning an identical smile from Carl.

 

Carl closed the front door and tied it shut with the same clove hitch knot as he had done before. He was very glad to see that both Jason and Michonne had survived and made it back without any harm having come to them. The thing that surprised him and his father most was the sheer quantity of supplies they had returned with.

As they sat in the front room, Jason and Michonne revealed the fruits of their adventure. Over thirty cans of food that would last them for a couple of weeks at least and a great variety of different food to boost. They had also found some medical supplies in the bathroom of the house they raided, allowing Rick to finally apply a proper bandage to his thigh after going through the painful process of cleaning the wound again. To compensate, Jason had grabbed some painkillers for him, powerful ibuprofen tablets that would help keep the pain and swelling down. They also noted that no bullets had been wasted on the run either and had told the story of the walker in the pantry. Out of newly earned respect, Michonne omitted the detail of Jason nearly getting bitten by it so as not to alarm Carl over his safety.

Despite how happy he was to see them back, Carl was still upset with Jason’s previous comments earlier in the day and the guilt of his own comments were weighing down on his conscience. Jason hadn’t really spoken to him yet, focusing more on his father than anyone else. Was he mad? If he was he did a good job of hiding it as his face never revealed any ill feelings towards the boy. The only difference was that he hadn’t spoken to him apart from a few choice words. Through all their celebrations of the successful supply run they had only been checking the contents of Michonne’s bag and a couple from Jason’s. Carl noticed that Jason’s bag was still pretty full looking. If Jason wouldn’t say anything, then Carl would.

“What else is in your bag, Jason?” He asked, gesturing to the backpack that was bulging slightly. “It wasn’t like that before.”

Jason smiled and unzipped the bag. “I’m glad you asked.”

Carl gave a confused stare as he watched the young man search inside the backpack. What would he have that only Carl was interested in or could ask about?

Jason finally revealed the contents that had been distorting the shape of his backpack. He pulled out six comic books that were in perfect condition. They were thick comics too and each one would take Carl a couple hours to read through properly, that much was certain. He handed them to Carl with a smile, noticing the smile on Rick’s face in his peripheral vision.

Carl’s face lit up as he took the comics into his hands.

“Cool! Thanks a lot, Jason!” He exclaimed in delight. “How’d you know I liked comics?”

Jason tapped his own nose with a smile. “Trade secret.”

Carl’s eyes scanned over to Michonne who winked at him as she too sat with a grin on her face. It made sense to him now. Michonne used to always get him comics while she was out on a run so she must have told Jason about it. Though it took a slight touch of magic away from Jason’s gift, the young man had still went out his way to get them. Carl could imagine him killing a walker just to get to the comics. Just for him.

Rick glanced out the window. The sun was getting low in the sky. He looked down at his watch, thankful that it still worked after all this time and decided to bring the celebrations to a close.

“We should eat soon.” He told them. “Then decide who is keeping watch.”

“I’ll do it.” Michonne piped up quickly.

“You just got back from a run. You should rest.” Rick told her, concerned for his wellbeing.

Michonne stood up, placing a hand on his shoulder. “No. You need to rest. You’re still injured.”

Rick was about to retort but Jason interrupted him.

“Rick, I’d listen to the woman if I were you.” He warned the former officer. “She’s not one to be argued with.”

The four of them shared a laugh at this. The laughter was rich from the truth of the statement and because they had the opportunity to enjoy themselves. To relax and not have to worry about survival every moment of their lives. They were alive. They were together. There were still things worth laughing at in the world.

 

_Jason stared out at the water of the lake. The sun was bright in the sky and caused the surface of the water to sparkle. The ducks quacked to each other as they swam about without a care in the world. They didn’t care that he was close by, they were used to people by now. Jason turned to the blonde beauty beside him, the individual who had saved him from a boring evening at the club after his friend had happened him._

_“I come here whenever I want to think about things.” Jason told them._

_“What do you usually think about?” The blonde asked him, curious._

_“Life mainly. Whether I’ll ever be truly happy.” Jason said, feeling guilty at being negative. “That’s the biggest one. Happiness.”_

_Jason turned back to look at the water. He felt warmth on his hand, the feeling of another hand. He couldn’t remember when the blonde had moved but they were now sitting a lot closer to him on the grass than they had been before._

_“Aren’t you happy right now?” They asked him, slightly nervous. “Spending time with a new friend?”_

_Jason sighed, he hadn’t meant for it to sound like that. “Yeah, but there’s still that slight feeling of loneliness. I can’t explain it.”_

_He felt the hand move off his own and end up caressing the back of his neck. He turned to the blonde and found himself staring into their deep brown eyes, their face inches from his. They were close enough that they could feel the heat of their breath on their faces. Jason’s heart started pounding. He had suspected that they might have shared some kind of attraction. They did flirt on occasion. He had chosen not to say anything as he didn’t want to be rejected so many times before._

_His train of thought was quickly derailed as he felt warm lips capture his own. His eyes were closed though he couldn’t remember when he had closed them. He leaned into the kiss as the blonde rubbed his back before lifting a leg over him and gently pushing him onto his back so that they were on top of him. The surprise of the movement had caused Jason to let out a small gasp which the blonde took advantage of, gently sliding their tongue between his lips to tease his own._

_They lay there on the grass like that for most of the afternoon. Kissing and holding each other close under the afternoon sun. Nothing else mattered in the world. They had each other. Jason felt his heart swell in these moments. This was the start of something new and exciting and beautiful in his life._

“Jason?” Carl’s voice sounded from the bedroom door.

Jason had gone up to his room after they had eaten and now that Michonne was resting before taking watch and his dad was reading a book, Carl wanted some company. He also wanted to talk to Jason about a couple things. When he had ascended the stairs he had found the young man lying on the bed with his eyes closed, so he had called out as he wasn’t sure if Jason was asleep or not.

Jason opened his eyes and turned his head. When he saw that it was Carl he sat up and swung his legs round so he was sitting on the edge of the bed.

“Hey, Carl.” He greeted with a soft smile.

“I didn’t wake you, did I?” Carl asked, a pang of guilt rushing through him. Jason would be tired from the supply run.

Jason smiled. “No, no. I was awake.” He answered truthfully.

Carl felt relief wash over him. At least he hadn’t disturbed the young man’s sleep. He lowered his gaze to the floor, sliding one of his feet over the wooden floor.

“I…wanted to thank you. For the comics.” He explained. “I lost all the others at the prison.”

Jason nodded slowly, hoping the boy would look up so he could read the emotions in his eyes a bit better.

“Michonne told me.” He told the fourteen year old. “I grabbed as many as I could fit in my bag.”

Carl looked up at him again, a soft smile creeping on his face. “Thanks.”

“You don’t have to thank me.” Jason told him with a smile, gazing into the boy’s eyes.

“I do.” Carl countered. “You didn’t have to.”

“Didn’t have to.” Jason repeated. “But I chose to.”

Carl smiled and nodded, he couldn’t argue with that statement. Jason obviously did care enough to go out his way for the comics. Not because he felt like he had to or because Michonne told him to but because he wanted to, he chose to. The morning argument came back to Carl’s mind complete with the accompanying guilt.

“I’m sorry for not having faith in you this morning.” He apologised, looking down again.

“And I’m sorry for not taking your feelings into account.” Jason also apologised, grateful that Carl had given him the opportunity to say sorry.

Carl looked back up at the young man and at that moment his conversation with Rick came back to him.

“I’m trying to get my dad to trust you more.” He admitted. He knew it wasn’t easy to convince his father of some things and a lot of the work would have to be Jason’s responsibility.

“Your dad is a good man, Carl.” Jason told him. “You should feel very lucky to still have him.”

That statement struck a chord with Carl. It was something he had never asked before and realised he probably shouldn’t. He wanted to know more about Jason’s family. He knew his parents died together but that’s all he knew. Carl took a breath, hoping he wasn’t going to be rude with his curiosity.

“What were your parents like?” He asked. “I know you lost them but I’d like to know.”

Jason smiled with both sadness and understanding. He remembered Michonne’s advice to let Carl in and decided to give it a try.

“My father was a lot like yours. Caring, clever and strong.” Jason explained. “He used to be a cop too. He was older than your dad though.”

“That’s something we have in common.” Carl pointed out with a smile which quickly faded. “Except you don’t have your dad anymore.”

Jason reached out and grabbed Carl’s hand, giving it a squeeze.

“Hey, don’t you worry about that.” He told the boy. “My parents got to die on their own terms. You’ve lost much more than I have.”

“Do you still miss them?” Carl asked. He cursed himself mentally for asking such a stupid and insensitive question.

“Every single day.” Jason answered, revealing the pain in his eyes to the teen.

“It doesn’t get any better, does it?” Carl asked, his eyes turning red as his grief started to bubble to the surface.

Jason let out a breath and shook his head. “No, it doesn’t. You just get used to it.”

Carl’s tears began to slowly roll down his cheeks. “I don’t want to get used to it.”

Jason, with his hand still squeezing Carl’s, pulled the boy towards him. Carl immediately wrapped his arms around the young man’s neck as Jason wrapped his arms around the teen’s slim body.

“You just need to remember one important thing.” He whispered in the boy’s ear as he rubbed his back to comfort him. “They’re in a better place now. Far away from this everlasting nightmare.”

 

**Chapter 3 is finally done. I got side-tracked last night and was unable to finish it as quickly as I had hoped. However, I’m fairly sure that it was up to expectation.**

**A thank you to the reviewers of chapter 2; Hunter Ark, Madison188, rk0192, vmbaby & RainbowO. Also thanks for the follows/faves and kudos. ^^**

**Leave a review and let me know what you thought of this chapter. What you liked, didn’t like. What was good and what wasn’t so good. If you have predictions or things you would like to see, also let me know. I don’t have many solid plans for this story, just an outline. So reader responses can help shape the story.**

**Thanks for reading! ^^**


	4. Walking The Line

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rick and Michonne decide that they need to find out once and for all if Jason is trustworthy. Will he pass the test of trust?

_The kettle let out a loud click to signal that it had finished boiling the water inside it. Steam rose out of the top slowly. Jason lifted it off the base and poured the boiling water into two separate black mugs before placing it back where it was. Retrieving the milk from the fridge, he also added a portion of that to each cup before returning the milk to its place on the shelf on the fridge door. He stirred both mugs of coffee thoroughly before rinsing the teaspoon and taking the mugs through to the bedroom._

_Lying in the bed half asleep with the covers still over them was the same blonde beauty that had come into his life a couple months before. Jason smiled as he observed their sleeping form and remembered the night before fondly. It had been one of the best nights of his life and was hopefully one of many to come. He didn’t want to disturb them but he figured they had both slept in long enough._

_“Wakey, wakey, poppet.” He called, rousing them from the addictive clutches of sleep. “Coffee’s ready.”_

_“5 more minutes!” They grumbled from under the covers._

_“Don’t make me tickle you!” Jason warned the blonde, which made them sit up quickly._

_“If you do that again I’m not responsible for your injuries.” The blonde threatened with a giggle._

_Jason laughed with them and handed them the mug of coffee._

_The blonde’s collarbones were exposed as the covers retreated as they reached for their mug. Jason sat on his side of the bed with his own mug and waited for his coffee to cool down enough to it wouldn’t burn his tongue or mouth._

_“Sleep well?” He asked the blonde, placing a kiss on their cheek._

_The action earned him a smile from the blonde who nodded. “Best I’ve slept in a long time.”_

_Jason smiled back. “Same here.”_

_The blonde took a sip of their coffee, taking care not to burn themselves before looking out the window. Outside the birds were singing, the sun was shining and people were starting their day. The noise of car engines was a constant dull hum in the background of whatever they did._

_Jason checked his mobile phone that had sat by his bedside all night. It was ten in the morning. He had a missed call from the night before which he remembered as being a call he chose to ignore as he and his bedfellow were otherwise occupied. He put the phone back down. He would call them back when he was free._

_Jason drank some of his coffee, closing his eyes as the warm liquid made its way through him and the caffeine awakened his senses. He was still a little tired but it was a Sunday. It was a lazy day. He yawned at the thought of doing next to nothing all day and reflected on the last couple months. The kiss by the lake had been the start of a relationship and he hoped it was one that would last. It felt right. He felt like they were two halves that had come together, never to be separate ever again._

_He finished his coffee shortly after his blonde bedfellow finished theirs and took their hand in his own. They stared at each other for a few beats. Jason was just admiring them. He did this often and they were used to it._

_“You’re so gorgeous, even first thing in the morning.” He told them, earning him a kiss._

_“No, you are.” The blonde countered with a smile._

_Jason smiled at the compliment and laughed at their silly little argument. They did this all the time and there never was a clear victor._

_“There’s a reason I can’t take my eyes off you, baby.” Jason told them, rubbing their cheek with his hand. “You’re going to have to accept that one day.”_

_“Maybe.” The blonde countered, kissing Jason and wrapping their arms around him. “But not today.”_

_Jason giggled as the blonde pulled him closer and lay back, pulling him on top of them without breaking the kiss._

_“If only life could be like this all the time.” The blonde lamented in thought._

_Jason left a small kiss on the end of their nose. “It can be. If we choose to make it that way.”_

_“Do you think we can?” The blonde asked him with uncertainty._

_“I can’t think of anything that could ruin this for us.” Jason answered, kissing them again and initiating morning love._

Jason’s eyes shot open. A noise had woken him. As he remembered where he was he realised that it was probably nothing. Unfortunately six months alone on the road had made him a rather light sleeper and his brain would almost always waken him if there was a noise it didn’t expect nearby. This one had been footsteps passed the door and down the stairs. Jason glanced out the window. It was still the dead of night.

He pushed the bed covers off his body and swung gently out of the bed. He didn’t bother to put his boots on. That’s when he heard it. Talking. It was coming from the front room downstairs. Jason opened his door as quietly as possible and pressed his ear against Carl’s door. He could hear soft breathing. Carl was asleep. That meant the talking must be Michonne and Rick, providing no one has snuck in but he dismissed the idea. Michonne wouldn’t let that happen.

He carefully approached the staircase, making sure his feet landed quietly and softly enough to avoid provoking the floorboards to creak. He hid in the darkness of the landing so he wouldn’t be spotted from the front room. Rick and Michonne were indeed talking. He listened in.

“What do you think of him?” Rick asked the samurai, keeping his voice low.

“He’s reckless.” She answered. “But he seems to be sincere.”

“The Governor seemed sincere before…” Rick mused aloud to her.

Michonne narrowed her eyes at the mention of the one-eyed monster. “He was too sincere. It wasn’t normal. Not for the world now.”

Rick nodded slowly. “Well, I still don’t trust him.”

Michonne never moved her gaze from Rick. “Why not?”

“He has killed five people. He’ll only talk about four of them.” Rick explained. “He’s hiding something. I don’t like that.”

“You think it was in cold blood?” Michonne asked the bearded man.

Rick shrugged, cleaning his revolver. “I don’t know. But something happened.”

“Rick, he told me about his parents.” Michonne explained. “He broke down into tears. He’s not like the Governor. He has a conscience.”

“For now.” Rick suggested cynically.

“Until you get better, we don’t have much choice.” Michonne told him, attempting to be pragmatic. “He can help. We just need to keep an eye on him.”

Rick looked up from his revolver, looking around the room.

“I don’t like how close Carl is getting to him.” Rick admitted. “He’s still upset. Not thinking straight.”

“Or he’s desperate to have someone close to his own age.” Michonne suggested. The age gap was still about five or six years but it was better than fifteen. “Last young person he was close to was Patrick.”

Rick grimaced at the mention of Patrick’s name. The friendly and clever boy who was the first to get sick. They lost a lot of people after he turned. It had been chaos in the prison. Fate had been cruel. A new flu that claimed lives followed by the Governor’s assault when they were at their weakest.

“We don’t even know what age he is.” Rick commented. “Maybe eighteen?”

“Can’t be much older than that.” Michonne answered, thinking aloud.

“He’s getting too close to Carl.” Rick continued. “Something doesn’t feel right.”

“You should talk to him.” Michonne advised. “I can take Carl on a run to give you privacy.”

Rick nodded. It sounded like a good idea. Carl wouldn’t complain about being allowed to go on a run. Jason could keep watch the following night as an excuse to not go out on the run the following morning. That would also make him more likely to talk as tiredness can lower psychological defences. Rick had to make sure he could be trusted. He had to keep his son safe.

“Carl says he’s one of us.” Rick told Michonne after standing up. His tone was thick with uncertainty.

“Carl said the same thing about me, remember?” Michonne pointed out.

Rick nodded but didn’t speak. She had a point. Initially he hadn’t trusted Michonne at all and had no intention of doing so while the threat of the Governor loomed. Carl had made the call that she was one of their group and he hadn’t been wrong. Could he be right about Jason? Only time would tell. He made his way back to the stairs, forcing Jason to quickly retreat back to his room.

Jason closed the door silently before Rick reached the top of the stairs. He listened as the man quietly walked passed the door and headed to the other bedroom. Jason lay back on his bed and stared at the ceiling, the paint was peeling all over. They still didn’t trust him. It hurt. They had been acting more trusting and friendly for the sake of Carl. He could understand why but he had always preferred people to be honest. Jason sighed. He would have to prove himself to them and have that talk with Rick. He wasn’t looking forward to it.

 

 Carl awoke and rubbed his eyes to remove the sleep from them. He pushed the covers off himself and yawned before putting his shoes on and tying the laces. He listened out but couldn’t hear any talking. Looking out the window the sun was still pretty low in the sky so he assumed it was still rather early. Apart from Michonne, he must have been the first one to wake up. He recalled how Jason had woken him up by tickling him the previous day and decided he would make good on his threat by getting revenge. He smirked to himself. He would win this time.

Carl carefully opened his door and listened closely. He could hear his father’s soft snores, so at least he was still asleep. Jason’s door was still shut so chances are he was still asleep too. Carl carefully made his way to the room, opening and closing the door quietly behind. Just as he had predicted, Jason was lying on his back and appeared to be fast asleep. This was going to be good.

Carl removed the covers just as Jason had done to him and prepared to start his tickle assault but stopped himself. Jason wasn’t wearing his black long sleeved shirt like he usually did. He was topless. Carl stopped for a moment to study Jason’s exposed torso. Scars on his arms looked like the evidence of past self-harm and a scar on his abdomen looked like a knife may have been the cause. It made Carl more and more curious about the young man’s past. Why did he have these scars? Every scar told a story. His father had a bullet scar and so did he. What was Jason’s story?

The other thing that stood out to Carl about Jason’s body was that the young man was obviously in good shape. His shirt and jacket made him look slim like Carl but underneath it his arm muscles were defined along with his abs. They weren’t large and were far smaller and more subtle than he remembered Shane’s muscles being but they were there. Carl felt a slight twang of envy. His body wasn’t like that yet. His father had called him a man but his body was still that of a child. Checking that Jason was still asleep, Carl ghosted his hand over Jason’s abdominal muscles and the scar that joined them. The scar was thick and very obvious to touch. If he had been stabbed it had clearly been with a large blade.

Jason stirred in his sleep. There was an odd sensation on his stomach and slightly lower down. It was faint but he was still mostly unconscious. Scenarios went through his mind on what it could be as he remained still, trying to feel out more information. Perhaps it was a walker that had made it in and was ripping him open to eat him, in which case his sleepy mind decided it was best to just go back to sleep. The feeling continued but without any pain however. It was more of an irritation, like an insect crawling over him. Perhaps that’s what it was, a spider or fly that had landed on him and was exploring his skin. If it was venomous the last thing he should do is move. He didn’t want to be bitten. As Jason regained consciousness he realised it couldn’t be an insect, unless the insect didn’t have any legs. Jason opened his eyes.

His breath caught in his chest. For some unknown reason, Carl was not only standing by his bedside but he had removed the covers and was currently tentatively touching his abs and the scar from his stab wound. Jason started to wake up quickly, his mind firing into action to try and explain what the boy was doing. Part of him wanted to pretend he was still sleeping just so he could see what Carl would do next but he remembered Rick’s suspicions, threat and distrust and decided it best to alert Carl to the fact he was awake.

“See something you like?” Jason teased the boy, knowing this would get a reaction.

Carl jumped, instantly removing his hand from Jason’s torso as his cheeks flushed red with embarrassment. He stammered his reply.

“No…I…was just looking at your scar.” Carl defended. It wasn’t a lie.

Jason tried to keep his expression vague and unreadable, though he was enjoying Carl’s embarrassment a little too much.

“And what are you doing standing over me as I sleep?” He continued to be difficult.

Carl lowered his gaze to the floor in an attempt to hide his burning face from view.

“I came in to tickle you awake.” Carl confessed. “Like you did to me.”

“What stopped you?” Jason asked the boy, curious as to why Carl hadn’t just tickled him. It would have worked but he chose not to mention that.

“Your scars.” Carl said lowly. “I didn’t know you had any.”

“They were my own fault.” Jason answered, sitting up and slipping his top back on in case Rick was to appear from nowhere.

“My dad has scars.” Carl told him, trying to deflect attention from himself.

“How did he get them?” Jason asked, swinging his legs out of the bed.

“He got shot at work.” Carl explained. “Then he got stabbed a few months ago on a run.”

Jason had slipped his boots on and was tying the laces as he answered. “I’ve never been shot. Can’t imagine how painful it must be.”

Carl hesitated before speaking. “I’ve been shot before.”

Jason looked up in surprise. “Who’d want to shoot you?”

Jason quickly cursed himself for phrasing his question that way. If Rick had been listening he could have taken it the wrong way. He could have thought Jason was flirting with his son, which wasn’t the case. Carl just seemed so nice all the time it was hard to imagine someone shooting him. Unless they were a monster of a person.

Carl didn’t appear to have registered the possible meaning behind the phrasing of the question and answered anyway.

“It was an accident. A farmer was hunting a deer.” Carl explained. “He shot the deer but the bullet hit me too. He hadn’t seen me.”

“You’re one lucky boy.” Jason told him. “But how’d you survive?”

“The owner of the farm was a vet.” Carl explained. “He saved my life. I just wish I could have done the same.”

Carl went quiet. Jason could tell he was placing unnecessary blame for the death of the man on himself.

“What kind of man was he?” Jason asked him softly, curious.

“Hershel was great. He had an answer to everything.” Carl told him, his eyes lighting up with a mix of sadness and admiration. “He was like a grandfather to me.”

Jason smiled. He felt sorry for not having met such a wonderful man in this dark world.

“Carl? He doesn’t blame you for what happened.” Jason told him. “So don’t blame yourself, okay?”

Carl nodded. There were no tears this time. Jason guessed that Carl was starting to get over some of his grief and was starting to focus more on the here and now. This was a positive step forward. One that he struggled with every day.

“How’d you get those muscles on your stomach?” Carl asked out of the blue, looking down again. “Only person I ever saw with them was Daryl…”

“Just got to exercise when you can really.” Jason answered with a shrug. “I’m sure you’ll get them eventually.”

Carl nodded, still looking down.

“Besides, nowadays it should always be function over fashion.” Jason told him, standing up from the bed. “Better to _be_ strong than to just look strong.”

Carl didn’t look up. He was still embarrassed about having been caught and now openly admitted he took some form of interest in Jason’s body, even if it was one of envy.

“When you’re older you’re going to be stronger than your dad.” Jason told him with a smile. “I’m sure of it.”

Carl nodded but didn’t give a verbal response. Jason still needed to mark his tally for the day but didn’t want to do it in front of Carl and raise questions.

“Why don’t you head down and check on Michonne?” He suggested to the boy.

Carl nodded and opened the door, closing it over behind him as he headed for the stairs. Jason wasn’t sure why he had gone quiet all of a sudden. The boy was a mystery sometimes.

From the landing of the staircase, Carl watched Jason through the gap in the door as he pulled out his notebook from his bag and marked his daily tally. Once he had done that, he started getting ready for the day as Carl descended the stairs to the front room where Michonne was.

Michonne lay in the middle of the room on the floor as she performed her morning exercises. She had her legs in the air and her hands behind her head as she raised her body, performing complicated sit ups.

“Someone’s up early.” She commented as he entered the room.

“Yeah, I just woke up.” Carl admitted.

“You could go back to sleep if you like.” Michonne told him. “I don’t think your dad would mind.”

Carl shrugged. “I’m up now.”

Carl headed for the kitchen to pour himself some cereal. Michonne stopped her workout for a moment, she had tried to get him to go back to sleep so she or Rick could talk to Jason in private. So much for that plan.

When Jason descended the stairs she didn’t speak right away. Had Jason not heard her conversation with Rick he would have assumed she was just tired from keeping watch but he had heard and he had some idea of what she was thinking.

“Morning.” He greeted her all the same. “Thanks for keeping watch, I know how boring it can be.”

“Good.” Michonne replied. “Because it’s your turn tonight.”

Jason nodded and joined Carl in the kitchen. As he was pouring the cereal Michonne came through to join them. She was about to sit down but realised that Rick didn’t appear to be awake yet. They needed to make plans and he always insisted on being the one making them. He could rest through the day so she headed back out of the kitchen.

“Just going to wake your dad.” She told Carl after he gave a confused look.

Rick had just woken from his sleep as Michonne opened the door with a smile. Noticing that he was just waking up at that moment she decided to tease him a little.

“We were beginning to worry you were getting too old to get out of bed.” She teased.

Rick scratched his beard as he stood up. “I never need to worry when I know you’ll come up to help me.”

They both gave a light laugh. They had bonded much closer over the past few months and especially over the past few days. They had no idea if anyone else from the prison had made it out so keeping Michonne and Carl close was Rick’s priority.

“Is Carl up?” Rick asked as he tightened his shoes.

“He was the first to wake up.” Michonne told him.

“Guess he didn’t spend all night reading comic books then.” Rick chuckled. He remembered the nights at the prison when he would catch Carl using a flashlight to read comics because he couldn’t sleep.

Rick and Michonne made their way into the kitchen and sat at the table with Jason and Carl. Jason felt wary of Rick. He knew something would have to happen between them for trust to be fully earned or destroyed. He noticed that the cereal had ran out now that they all had their bowlfuls.

“Looks like we need more cereal.” Jason pointed out.

“We could go look for some.” Carl suggested, looking at Jason.

“No.” Rick interjected quickly.

“Seriously?” Carl retorted. “What? Am I a defenceless kid again?”

“Carl, your dad just doesn’t want anything to happen to you.” Michonne tried to prevent the brewing argument.

“You mean he doesn’t trust me. I managed fine on my own before.” Carl countered. “And this time Jason will be with me so I won’t be alone.”

Rick glared across the table at Carl. “You’re not going out there. Alone or with Jason.”

“What if Michonne comes with us?” Jason suggested, trying his best not to antagonise Rick.

“She’ll be tired from keeping watch.” Rick countered. “That’s not fair on her.”

“It’s just for some cereal, dad.” Carl spat. “Cereal.”

The two Grimes stared each other down. Rick wouldn’t back down because his love and need to protect his son wouldn’t allow him to do so. Carl wouldn’t back down because his confidence and need to prove himself to his father wouldn’t allow him to do so.

Jason stared across the table at Michonne. He stared her right in the eyes and lifted his eyebrows, trying to prompt her to say something.

“Rick, its fine.” She interrupted the staring contest. “It will be a short run. I’ll go with them.”

Rick sighed and nodded his head. He didn’t feel it was fair on Michonne but he realised this was the best way to keep the argument from exploding and ruining the day.

“Will you be alright on your own?” Jason asked Rick, trying to show concern when the opportunity presented itself.

“Yeah I’ll be fine.” Rick answered gruffly. “I’ll just sleep for a couple hours.”

 

Half an hour later and Carl, Michonne and Jason were walking through the quiet neighbourhood. The only sound apart from their footsteps was the occasional bird and the movement of the plants and trees under the force of the wind. One thing they could all agree on was that they had been very lucky with having found an area that had very few walkers. Jason knew from first-hand experience, however, that if a large herd was to pass through then they would all be killed. This was the main reason they had agreed that each night someone stayed up to keep watch. They would need all the time they could get to escape from a herd as that many walkers could tear all the houses down let alone the one they stayed in. People were another persistent threat that would present itself on occasion. Jason felt fortunate that he had only encountered two dangerous individuals in the last six months but a bad feeling in his gut told him that was about to change soon.

Behind him, Carl and Michonne chatted away like the zombie apocalypse wasn’t taking place.

“I don’t believe for a second that you didn’t do some kind of sport!” Carl exclaimed with an incredulous look at Michonne.

“I swear, sport wasn’t my thing.” She replied with a laugh. “I would go out jogging and go to the gym but sport was too competitive.”

“But sports can be so much fun!” Carl continued.

“What? You trying to say I’m not any fun?” Michonne teased, pretending to look hurt.

“No! But we could have much more fun if you knew some sports!” Carl countered.

“I don’t think so.” Michonne laughed. “I’m not the sporty type.”

“I’ll make you a deal.” Carl beamed, a cheeky smirk on his face.

“Oh yeah?” Michonne questioned, curious to hear his proposition.

“I’ll teach you some sports and in return you teach me how to use a sword.” Carl declared excitedly.

“You want to know how to use the sword?” Michonne asked, surprised that he would be interested.

“Yeah, it’s one of the most badass weapons I’ve seen anyone use!” Carl complimented.

“Oh, one of the most badass weapons?” Michonne noted his word usage. “What others are there?”

“I always wanted to try Daryl’s crossbow.” Carl admitted. “He promised to teach me but…”

Carl trailed off, the painful memories of the prison coming back with a vengeance. Michonne wrapped an arm around the boy, cocking her head to peer under his hat.

“I’m sure Daryl’s fine.” Michonne tried to reassure him. “He’s one of the toughest people we’ve known.”

Carl nodded. Michonne was probably right but it still hurt so badly. What hurt more wasn’t the possibility of them all being dead but the simple fact that they had no way of knowing. Even if they were alive there was a very slim chance they would ever see each other again.

Jason stopped walking and got their attention. He gestured to the house they had stopped in front of.

“We haven’t checked this one yet.” He said, focused. “So we can start here.”

They quickly made their way to the front door which was locked. They were used to that being the case so they were prepared. Jason took the right side of the door and Carl took the left. They both had their guns at the ready while Michonne stood a few feet back from the door, sword in hand.

“Okay. Quick and quiet, agreed?” Jason confirmed, earning nods from both Carl and Michonne.

“Okay, I’ll break the door down. Carl, we stay where we are.” Jason explained. “I’ll bang the door a couple times. If one comes out Michonne can slice its head off.”

Jason moved in front of the door and waited for a moment, looking at Carl.

“If there’s a few of them, we’ll cover Michonne.” He told the teen who nodded and made sure he was ready.

Jason barged the door open with his shoulder and stepped back to his original position at the side of the doorway. He tapped his gun against the door loudly, the sound of metal hitting wood being rather sharp and loud. A groan sounded from inside the house. Jason signalled for Michonne to wait a moment.

After a few more beats a walker revealed itself in the room. Michonne tightened her grip on her sword and stormed forward. The walker saw her and snarled, stumbling towards her only to receive the tip of the sword straight into its forehead. The walker stopped moving and collapsed to the floor once Michonne retracted her sword from its skull. From behind some of the furniture, three more walkers appeared as if out of thin air. Due to the hallway that she stood in, Michonne couldn’t swing her sword and could easily be overwhelmed.

Three shots sounded loudly from behind her as the walkers dropped to the floor. She turned round to see Jason and Carl side by side in the doorway, their guns aimed at where the walkers once stood. The formation that Jason had suggested, one which she had used with Daryl and Rick in the past, had worked perfectly. She was grateful that both of her companions had good aim. Jason was much more focused than last time. Was it because Carl was with them or because some of what she said the previous day had sank in?

Inside the house silence dominated. No more iconic groans or snarls of walkers could be heard. They didn’t need to speak, they all knew what they needed to do. They would search each room for the supplies inside and regroup in the front room. If they found a decent amount of cereal they wouldn’t need to go to another house or on another room. If they only found one box or so then they would need to go on another run the following day. They split up and began searching different rooms.

Michonne started with the master bedroom. She decided to grab some things that could serve multiple purposes, such as hair brushes and perfume. Perfume was flammable and could be used as a desperate weapon or to help fuel a fire. Hair brushes could help with cleaning as well as their traditional use. She also found some clothes that could replace her current outfit so she folded them up and placed them in her bag as well.

Jason was clearing the front room of supplies. The three walkers they had met upon entry had all formed a suicide pact and overdosed together. There were still plenty of pills and they could be used for a lot of different medical problems. He sealed the bottles and bagged them. On the floor lay a revolver. Jason picked it up by the barrel and discovered that the handle was broken. It was a mystery what happened to this gun for that to happen. He emptied the cylindrical chamber and pocketed the bullets, they looked like they would fit Rick’s Colt Python.

Carl was in the kitchen searching for canned food and most importantly cereal. He opened the various cabinets but couldn’t find any cereal. There were plenty of canned foods that he was able to take along with some knives from the cutlery drawer. The last place left to look was a large kitchen cupboard. He opened the door and jumped back in fear as a walker came charging out from behind the door. Carl tried to aim in time but the walker was upon him and grabbed his shoulders with a surprisingly vice-like grip. The weight of the walker pushed him back against the counter, the sharp pain causing him to drop his gun as he grabbed the walker by the arms and tried to fight his way out of the grip. The walker was bigger and heavier than Carl and continued to push him against the counter and the kitchen table as it relentlessly tried to bite the young teen.

Jason heard the commotion and ran for the kitchen, hearing Carl’s shouts of effort and fear as the walker threatened to overpower him. Michonne, still upstairs also heard the struggle and ran for the stairs, practically jumping down them to get to him in time. Jason burst into the kitchen and saw that the walker had Carl pinned against the wall and by the looks of things his arms were about to give way. He grabbed the first hard object he could find that lay on the counter, a stainless steel teapot, and slammed it into the walker’s head. The walker let go of Carl and dropped to the floor. Jason pinned it down and started to slam the teapot into its head repeatedly. Blood splattered over the floor and on the wall while the base of the teapot was now a dark crimson. Jason’s hands were covered and blood splats decorated his jacket.

He dropped the teapot to the floor, the metal clang resonating on the tiles and stood up. He looked at Carl who was had already retrieved his gun and was catching his breath.

“You okay?” He asked, trying to catch his own breath.

Carl nodded. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

Jason looked at the open door, when closed it looked like a kitchen cupboard but now that it was open it was revealed to be another walk-in pantry.

“What is it with fucking pantries?” Jason cursed, finding some dark humour to the situation now that he knew Carl was safe.

Michonne gave Carl an almost motherly back rub while she made sure he was as fine as he said he was. Once she was sure, she stepped forward and looked inside the pantry. There weren’t many cans of food but there were three boxes of cereal sitting on one of the shelves.

 

By the time they had returned Rick had woken up. They sat in the front room and went through the supplies they had gathered. It wasn’t much compared to previous trips but some more canned food, three boxes of cereal and several potential weapons or tools were useful.

Jason eyed Michonne’s sword, which sat in its scabbard on the armchair.

“You know, a friend’s grandfather once made me a samurai sword as a gift.” Jason explained. “It was a beautiful sword and he even engraved my name onto the blade.”

“What happened to it?” Michonne asked, as it was evident he didn’t have the sword.

“It got left behind in my parent’s house. I never did go back to get it.” Jason answered. “I couldn’t bring myself to do that.”

“Sometimes it’s for the best.” Rick commented.

“It’s a shame though.” Jason continued. “Carl could have had it after Michonne teaches him how to use it.”

Michonne smiled at Jason’s thoughtfulness on that point but immediately noticed that Carl was quieter than usual. He was obviously still shaken up from the walker attack. What she didn’t know was that it wasn’t the shock or fear, it was the guilty feeling of helplessness at having been saved again. That incident had proven his father’s fears to be well placed.

“I forgot to mention, I got myself a hat.” Michonne said, nudging Carl to get his attention.

From her bag, she pulled out a large fluffy pink hat with a feather on top of it. The pink hat combined with her dreadlocks and dark attire made her look positively ridiculous. This was enough to get a laugh out of Carl, which in turn brought a smile to Rick’s face and that of Jason.

Jason stood up and grabbed his bag.

“Since I’m taking watch tonight.” He told them. “I’m going to get a quick sleep beforehand. Wake me when it’s time.”

With that said and acknowledged, he headed up the stairs to the room he had been using and closed the door behind him. As soon as he had done so, he threw his bag against the far wall of the room and slumped down onto the bed.

 

_They had stepped out of the darkness as if they were a living shadow. A tall, heavy set man with a thick dark beard and long hair. He stood and blocked the path that Jason was travelling on. The sun had set behind the horizon an hour before and he had been looking for a place to spend the night. Jason quickly took out his gun and aimed it at the man. He didn’t speak but instead waiting for the man to identify the situation._

_“That’s a nice weapon.” The man taunted calmly. “What else you got?”_

_“A bag full of nothing.” Jason answered, keeping his gun aimed at the man’s head._

_“I haven’t seen a bag of nothing before!” The man continued in jest. “Mind if I take a look?”_

_“Mind getting out of my way before I put a bullet in you.” Jason warned, though he was unsure if he would have it in him._

_The man shook his head. Jason’s vision went blurry, his mind just registering a sound from behind him as he collapsed to the ground in a daze. His gun clattered to the ground in front of him before being kicked aside by the stranger. Another pair of boots came into view to reveal they were a pair. Jason groaned as he tried to get back up but a kick to the head sent him into another blurry daze. One of the men lifted him off the ground so the other could take his backpack off and place it on the hood of an abandoned car._

_Jason continued to try and get back to his feet but before he could get his bearings one of the two strangers lifted him onto his feet and dragged him to the other side of the car. They slammed his head against one of the windows before punching him twice in the side and gut. Jason let out a pained shout as the strikes connected, forcing his assailant to grab his neck, choking him._

_“If you want to live a little longer you’ll keep your fucking mouth shut!” The man threatened, conscious of any sounds that might attract the undead army to their location._

_For good measure, Jason received a strong backhand across the face that burst his lip open and caused his cheek to burn with pain. The man then grabbed him by the hair, pulling it hard enough to generate tears in Jason’s eyes before he slammed him face first into the car window again. Jason groaned in pain, trying desperately to regain his senses. Fortunately the hits to the head had nulled some of the pain from the more recent strikes and the adrenaline building in his system also acted like a painkiller._

_“Well, well, well, the kid has some wonderful gifts for us in here.” The first man called out to his partner in crime from the other side of the car. “You should thank him!”_

_Jason’s head was rammed against the glass again, the force of the impact causing it to crack slightly. He heard the sound of a belt buckle being undone and that’s when he realised what they meant by thanking him. This disgusting man behind him was planning on raping him. The apocalypse truly was the home of monsters. Jason had always been taught to respect the law, with a police officer for a father he didn’t have much choice. Laws didn’t exist anymore. Only the laws of nature remained. Survival of the fittest._

_The man behind him had lowered his jeans and now had one hand snake round to undo Jason’s while the other pinned his head against the car. Jason took the opportunity and flipped one of his legs up, firmly landing his foot on the man’s groin. The man let out a grunt of pain and dropped to his knees. Jason whipped round and grabbed the man’s head with both hands. Using all the strength he had he slammed the man’s face into the back bumper of the car, bursting his nose open in a sudden display of crimson._

_Spotting the knife the man had on his belt, Jason quickly reached down and grabbed it. Heart pumping full of adrenaline, fear and anger, he plunged the knife into the man’s throat. The man gargled out in shock and pain as blood sprayed out of the wound at high pressure, covering Jason’s front._

_Jason pulled out the knife and turned round, preparing to get the other man but instead he received a sudden punch to the face that knocked him off balance. He staggered as he felt the blood trickle down from his nose and past his lips. He tried to react but a sharp kick to his leg brought him down on one knee. Jason tried desperately to get back to his feet but another kick hit him straight in the chest, winding him and leaving him gasping for breath._

_As he struggled for air, the man loomed over him with the knife in hand and plunged it into his lower stomach. Jason let out a scream of pain as his chest rapidly rose and fell with each desperate pant of adrenaline and fear. He looked up at the bearded man who wore a look of pure hatred on his face._

_“I hope you enjoy pain asshole!” The man bellowed in his face. “Because I’m going to make this fucking slow!”_

_Jason’s eyes scanned down and noticed the man’s Glock handgun stuffed in the front of his belt. He quickly returned his eyes to the man’s face which was now inches from his own, bubbling with fury. Jason spat blood into the man’s face and reached for the gun. He pulled it out in one swift motion and quickly pulled the trigger, shooting the man in the gut. The bearded man doubled over onto his back from the shot, wailing in pain._

_Jason struggled to his feet, the knife still embedded in his torso. His breathing was laboured, his vision blurry and his face blooded. The man continued to shout in pain, trying to claw away from the advancing young man. Jason grimaced from the agony that shot through his body as his legs felt weak and his head felt light, the effects of blood-loss setting in. He aimed the Glock at the man’s chest and fire two more times._

_Suddenly his left leg buckled, bringing him down on one knee. The knife in his side was agony and the temptation to pull it out was phenomenal but the one rational part of his brain that was still working told him it was best not to. He growled in agony as he lifted himself back on two feet and used the car for support.  Jason grabbed his back from the hood, all the contents were fortunately still inside, then picked up his gun from the ground and opened the back door of the car. He forced himself inside and closed the door, he knew that plenty of undead freaks would be on their way because of the shots he had fired. He collapsed on the floor between the front and back seats and felt himself slip out of consciousness as everything went dark._

Jason fluttered his eyes open. His body clock had told him he didn’t have long to sleep. The room was fairly dark so it was obviously night time outside. A light source became obvious as his eyes adjusted to their surroundings. By the way the light shined on the wall next to him it was a flashlight in the room. He turned his head to look over at where he had left his bag and a mix of panic and rage set in.

Hunched over his bag, his precious notebook in hand, was none other than Rick Grimes. Not only was he looking at the tally marks on the pages but he had also found a photo that was hidden between them. He had no right to look at that. Jason didn’t care what justification Rick had. Lack of trust. Needing to protect his son. Being the intimidating leader. This was one thing Jason wouldn’t tolerate no matter who it was.

Jason gently placed his feet on the floor so as to not make any noise and stood up. His right hand rested on the top of his gun which sat in his leg holster. Rick still hadn’t noticed as he was too busy studying the book and the photo.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Jason hissed, causing the older man to spin round in surprise.

Rick’s eyes settled on Jason’s infuriated glare.

“I needed to know who you are.” Rick answered with an icy cold. “ _What_ you are.”

“You could have asked!” Jason hissed, taking a step forward.

“I _did_.” Rick spat back. “You didn’t answer.”

Jason glared, as if trying to kill Rick with his stare for invading his privacy in such a reckless and obtuse way. His hand tightened round the grip of his gun, feeling his self-control slipping.

Rick took a clip out of his pocket and held it up to the light. “You might need this.”

Jason growled. Rick had anticipated any violence and removed the ammo from his gun. The gun that was given to him six months ago.

Rick held up the picture that had been in the notebook. It depicted a laughing Jason with his arm around a young man with blonde hair who was also laughing. They were both roughly the same age, with the blonde looking slightly younger than Jason did.

“Was that who you killed?” Rick interrogated him. “Is that what you won’t talk about?”

Jason’s right eye twitched from a mixture of rage and pain. So many negative emotions were boiling inside him and were bubbling to the surface. There was no way to tell whether he was going to scream with rage or cry with grief.

“Why ask if you already know the damn answer!” Jason snarled, his eye still twitching.

Rick glared at him, tilting his head down in his classic look of intimidation. “Because I need to know that you’re not a threat to me, to Michonne or to _Carl_.”

Jason felt himself reach his breaking point. Tears of grief cascaded down his face that still bore the expression of his rage at the betrayal of his privacy.

“Have you ever made a mistake that you could never forgive yourself for?” Jason spat at the man. “A mistake that cost the life of someone truly precious to you?”

Jason’s tears continued to fall from his eyes like rain.

“A person so important that when they died, you died too.” Jason continued. “Forcing yourself to live with that pain inside you. Every minute of every day. Well, have you?!”

Rick froze on the spot in thought. _Lori_. When she had died he had lost his grip on sanity. He blamed himself, punished himself. He did it every day. He saw visions of her whenever important decisions needed to be made. He wished he could have taken it all back, done things differently and fixed things. The pain and rage that had shot through him when the Governor had spoken about her and Shane was powerful. He could still feel it. It had been _his_ fault she had died. Rick had made the choice not to kill the last hostile prison inmate and just left him for dead instead. The lunatic had come back and attacked the prison from the inside, releasing walkers everywhere. As a consequence, Lori went into labour in a dangerous, dark room inside the walker infested prison tombs. She had died as a consequence of his mistake. That’s why she had haunted him so much. Why she _still_ haunted him.

Rick came out of his thoughts and stared at the crying young man in front of him. Here was someone who had obviously made a similar mistake. Instead of going crazy and hallucinating, he simply counted days in a notebook. He remembered the person. Looked at them every day and focused on surviving. Now he was with them, helping them to survive instead of giving into his grief. His private grief.

Rick had the best intentions in mind when he sneaked into the bedroom. He needed to keep his son safe which was something that was getting harder and harder in an ever more brutal word. Instead of uncovering some dark secret that proved Jason was a threat, he had ended up standing in front of the young man and taunting him with the death of his loved one. Rick would kill someone who tried to do that to him with Lori or anyone else that had died as a result of his mistakes.

Rick swayed on the spot before nodded slowly. He stared the young man directly in the eyes instead of averting his gaze.

“Carl’s mother.” He confessed. “I made a mistake and she died for it.”

Jason was aware that Carl’s mother was dead simply from her absence and the lack of any mention of her. He hadn’t expected it to have been Rick’s fault, whether directly or indirectly, it wasn’t something he had expected to hear.

Jason looked down at the floor and wiped his tear stained eyes before looking back up at Rick.

“So now you know why I didn’t want to tell you before.” Jason told him, his voice low.

Rick nodded with understanding. It had been a complicated situation and neither decision had been the right one. There was no magic answer.

“So why are we fighting?” Jason asked the bearded man.

Rick stared back at the young man, glancing back to the notebook and picture along with his Colt Python that was holstered on his leg.

“Because I needed to make sure Carl was safe.” Rick finally answered. “I’ll do anything to keep him safe. Anything.”

“I heard you talk about me to Michonne last night.” Jason confessed.

“I’m sorry.” Rick apologised and was about to say more but Jason interrupted him.

“No, I’m sorry, Rick.” Jason replied. “This was my fault.”

“Carl’s safety is all that matters to me anymore.” Rick admitted to him. “I’ll die to keep him safe.”

Jason nodded. Rick was a true father through and through. However, they lived in a very brutal world that was never going to get any better, only worse.

“But he’s never going to be safe.” Jason countered. “None of us are safe.”

Rick nodded slowly in silent acceptance of the painful truth and the reality of the world. Nobody was safe no matter where they were. Safety was just a temporary illusion. He closed Jason’s notebook after returning the photo to its original place and placed the book back into the bag.

“None of us are safe.” Jason repeated. “But there is safety in numbers.”

 

**This chapter was a pretty heavy one to write actually. A lot of varied emotions and plot points that I needed to get done.**

**Carl is a hard one to keep in character when placed in situations unlike anything he has ever been in during the show, so I’ve been forced to use a bit of guess work. I hope it’s not too far off the mark.**

**One reviewer pointed out that Rick and Michonne seemed to accept Jason too quickly, so I feel I not only rectified that but gave it a far better pay-off at the end. I don’t see Rick’s actions at the end being out of character either. He’s a police officer with no restrictions. Snooping isn’t beneath him.**

**I hope the Carl/Michonne moments were satisfying as I can honestly admit they are a lot of fun to write.**

**Also, to the guest reviewer who insinuated that I was copying another author’s fanfiction: The core concept may be similar (Male OC bonding with Carl) but that’s where the similarities end. I’ll be going in a completely different direction. In any case, there are many fanfictions with the same premise for a multitude of characters.**

**Next chapter will focus more on the episode Claimed. I wasn’t sure how much time passes between After and Claimed, so I figured a couple days at most was enough.**

**I should also point out that I place Easter Eggs in my creative works all the time. A couple people pointed out the 28 Days Later reference in chapter 3 but there are many other different references in all the chapters. Cookies are awarded to those who find them.**

**Thanks go out to my reviewers: RainbowO; Madison188; isabelgastelum2000; rk0192; Lithophene and the various guests.**

**Constructive criticism is appreciated. Flames are used to cook waffles.**

 


	5. Accepted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carl and Michonne go out on a supply run. While they are gone, Jason and Rick end up trapped in the house with a group of well-armed, violent men. Can they escape without being detected or will a sacrifice have to be made?

The room was dark. The great consuming darkness of the night enveloped the room. Furniture became simple shadows amongst greater shadows. The clouds hid the moon from view making the night even darker than it usually was. There was complete silence in the house and outside. Not even insects appeared to be making any sounds. Jason sat in the room alone with only the silent darkness to keep him company. He observed a walker as it stumbled aimlessly down the street outside. From what he could see, it wore a police officer’s uniform, the gun was missing from the holster and the rotting flesh of the face showed that this walker turned many months before. The more Jason watched the walking corpse, the more he thought about it. Though it was just a monster now, a threat that he had to take care of daily, it was once a person. That man had been a police officer. A man who had a sense of duty and responsibility to protect others. He could have had a family, a wife and kids. He could have had many funny and interesting life stories and lessons to tell you. He could have been an amazing friend and lots of fun on a night out. Now he was dead. Gone. An empty shell that wandered from place to place in search of food. They had a lot in common.

A floorboard creaked off to his left. Jason whipped his head around, reaching for his knife as a reflex action. Standing at the bottom of the stairs, obscured by the darkness, was Carl. Carl quietly made his way over and sat beside the young man.

“Hey.” He greeted quietly.

“What’s up?” Jason responded with a soft but curious smile.

Carl rubbed his eyes. “Can’t sleep.”

Jason gestured to his side. “Sit for a while then.”

Carl smiled and did as he was told, sitting next to Jason. It was so dark in the room he could barely see Jason’s face even when the young man stared right at him. He didn’t mind the room being dark though. Jason had resumed his constant stare out the window, giving Carl time to observe him and think about some things.

“Did you ever have anyone special before or after… _this_?” Carl asked out of the blue.

“What do you mean by special?” Jason asked, turning to the boy with a smile. He knew exactly what Carl meant but he wanted the boy to be blunt.

Carl hesitated a little. “Well, my Dad had my Mum and Glen had Maggie…”

“You mean a girlfriend?” Jason asked the teen.

Carl nodded but due to the darkness decided to vocalise his response.

“Yeah.”

Jason smiled. It was such an innocent yet also personal question. He reminded himself that Carl was at that age now where he would start questioning these things. Despite the zombie apocalypse, he was still bound to have urges.

“Sort of.” Jason answered softly. It wasn’t a lie.

“What do you mean by _sort of_?” Carl asked him, somewhat confused.

Jason couldn’t help but smile. He had done the mathematics in his head and figured Carl had been twelve when everything changed. That would leave it open to reason that he probably had no concept of the variety of different relationships people could have. He probably didn’t know what homosexuality even meant, let alone bisexuality, pansexuality and all the other weird and wonderful labels that were applied to people.

Jason turned on the spot to face Carl. “How about we play a game?”

“What kind of game?” Carl asked in confusion. He wanted to know more about Jason, not play games in the middle of the night.

“It’s called Truths.” Jason answered. “We take turns asking each other questions and we have to answer.”

Carl’s face lit up in the darkness. This is one game he wanted to play. He nodded.

“Okay.” Carl accepted and took it upon himself to start. “So, what did you mean by _sort of_?”

Jason rubbed the back of his head and hoped Carl truly had no knowledge of these things and therefore no preinstalled bigotry.

“I had someone I was in love with but it wasn’t a girl.” He admitted cautiously, trying to read Carl’s reaction. “It was a guy, a couple years younger than me. He was the best thing that ever happened to me.”

Carl scrunched his face in confusion. “I didn’t know guys could love other guys like that.”

Jason let out a quiet laugh of relief.

“Well, they can. Back before the world ended we called guys like that homosexuals, or gay for short.” Jason explained. “But there were many different sexualities based on what people felt they were attracted to.”

Carl nodded, taking all this new information in. He had heard the term gay before but had never been told nor had he ever asked what it actually meant. Now he knew.

“So is that what you are?” Carl asked with slight hesitation, trying to use the word right. “Gay?”

Jason shook his head. “No, I’m what used to be called bisexual, or bi for short.” He explained. “I find both genders attractive for different reasons.”

Carl nodded in understanding. As he didn’t ask anything else right away, Jason took it upon himself to make it his turn.

“So, what about you?” Jason asked. “Ever have someone special like that?”

Carl shook his head, he felt his face heat up from embarrassment.

“No. Never.” Carl admitted. “There’s not many people my age.”

Jason nodded slowly but with a slight frown on his face. He felt sorry for Carl. The poor lad had dealt with all sorts of violence and fear but had never been allowed to enjoy the pleasure of romance.

“Well, you’ve still got plenty of time to meet someone special.” Jason answered with an optimistic tone.

“Are you sure?” Carl asked, not willing to believe such optimism in the brutal world filled with death that they called home.

“As my father used to say; what’s for you won’t go by you.” Jason quoted. “It means that if something is meant to happen to you then it will. No exceptions.”

Carl shrugged and accepted it. There could be truth to the statement and it wasn’t overly optimistic either. It could apply to bad things too.

“Was your boyfriend the fifth person you killed?” Carl asked, continuing the game and hoping his question wasn’t too difficult to answer.

Jason looked down at the floor. He remembered Michonne’s words that he should open up and decided to follow through with it.

“Yeah. He was.” Jason admitted painfully. “He got bit so I ended it for him.”

“I’m sorry.” Carl stated softly.

“Don’t be.” Jason answered with a soft smile. “It’s not like it was your fault.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t get to meet him.” Carl continued.

Jason felt tears sting his eyes. He hadn’t expected Carl to make such a declaration and it really touched him. Carl wasn’t asking to know what kind of killer Jason was, he was asking because he wanted to know. He cared.

“Me too.” Jason answered, sniffing away the tears that threatened to fall.

“It’s your turn.” Carl reminded him, as he still wanted to continue the game. He was getting to see the pain Jason carried and felt a responsibility to share it with him. He had seen so much pain in his short life which made him want to take some of it away for those around him whenever possible.

Jason decided he should ask Carl a personal question as well. He hoped it didn’t upset him too much.

“What happened to your mother?” Jason asked slowly and gently.

Carl’s face dropped. The wound was still fresh because of the loss of his little sister.

“You don’t have to answer that.” Jason quickly added, fearing he had crossed a line.

“We were attacked from inside the prison. One of the inmates. Maggie, my mum and I were in the tombs.” Carl explained slowly, not looking up. “There were walkers everywhere and she started to have the baby. It wouldn’t come out.”

Carl’s breathing became heavier, the memory emotionally taxing for him.

“Maggie had to cut the baby out. My sister was fine but…” Carl trailed off, sniffing in the darkness. “My mum died. I shot her so she wouldn’t come back.”

Jason instantly recognised the parallels that were starting to form between Carl and himself. The boy in front of him had to shoot his own mother after seeing her die in front of him, probably in agony. Yet from that agony and death, came the joy and life of his baby sister. However, the baby had obviously been lost during the destruction of the prison. Now Jason understood.

Jason placed a hand on the teen’s shoulder.

“She’s in a better place and I’m sure she’s proud of you.” Jason told him, earning some tears from Carl who tried to hide their existence. “I’m sorry I didn’t get to meet her.”

Carl took a moment to control his breathing before continuing the game. Jason couldn’t help but smile. The boy was like a dog with a bone.

“Why do you mark those tallies in your book?” Carl asked bluntly. He had asked this before and this time he wanted an answer. He felt that he deserved it.

“To remind myself that I’m still here and it happened.” Jason answered truthfully, though he was hiding his guilt. Carl didn’t need to know that.

“To remind yourself that he died?” Carl asked in continuation, careful of how he sounded when asking that question.

“Yeah but more that the relationship happened, you know?” Jason answered. “That he was real. I met him. I loved him. It wasn’t a dream.”

Carl accepted that. He wasn’t sure how he felt about Jason torturing himself with the memory of the death every morning. He could understand wanting to remember the good times and to hold on to the proof of them having happened.

“You’re a good shot, Carl.” Jason asked suddenly, remembering the boy’s aim when shooting walkers. “Who taught you?”

“My dad’s best friend, Shane.” Carl answered.

Jason didn’t push for more information. He already could tell the man was dead and something must have happened as he had never been mentioned up until now.

“Do you think you’ll ever love anyone else?” Carl asked abruptly. His speech had slowed as he was now lying back, slowly but surely falling asleep.

Jason shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe.” He answered, seriously considering the possibility. “It would have to be someone truly special though…and unique.”

He turned back to the fourteen year old to discover that he had finally fallen asleep. Jason couldn’t help a light chuckle erupt from his throat. It was cute. He couldn’t leave Carl lying on a hard floor so he got up and carefully slipped his arms under Carl’s legs and back. Jason grunted as he lifted the boy’s sleeping form. He was heavier than he looked. He carried the young teen up the stairs, his arms burning from the strain but he ignored it. When he reached the room Carl had been sleeping in, he lay him down on the bed and tucked him back in.

Before he turned to leave he studied the boy’s sleeping face. He was so peaceful when he slept. You could never tell that he had experienced any of the horrible things that he had been forced to endure. He turned and headed for the door, closing it gently behind him so as to not make any noise. When he turned to head back down the stairs, he caught sight of Rick standing in one of the bedroom doorways watching him. He smiled and gave Jason a silent nod before returning to bed. Jason smiled and headed back down to continue his watch.

 

_Jason could hear the chattering of a generator. He felt dizzy and his limbs felt like lead weights. His eyes fluttered open to reveal a tiled ceiling. He could feel the soft embrace of a bed beneath his weak and heavy body. Strange sensations began to filter through his senses. Needles and wires were hooked up to his body and a soft beep could be heard with each of his heartbeats. Jason’s eyes started scanning his surroundings. He was in a hospital ward. He was hooked up to a drip and a monitor. He slowly sat up, groaning in pain as he did so. He felt so disorientated. His memory started coming back to him violently. The two thieves. The fight. The stabbing. The walker herd. The car. An older man’s face. Shouting. Lights. Then nothing. He held his head and groaned, trying to make sense of it all._

_The door of the ward opened and an older man came in. His grey beard was clearly kept trimmed and his hair cut short. He wore the typical white coat of a doctor and carried a clipboard with him. He was the man from the car. Pain shot through Jason’s head like a wasp was stinging his brain. He couldn’t remember clearly._

_“So, our patient is finally awake.” The man stated. His voice was clear. His tone was friendly._

_“How are you feeling young man?” The doctor asked with a friendly smile._

_“My head is pounding.” Jason answered with a groan. “Where am I?”_

_The doctor handed him a glass of clear liquid. “Here, drink this. You’re dehydrated and your blood sugar level is low.”_

_Jason was in too much pain to argue. He took the glass and gulped some of it down, his face contorting slightly. His throat burned from the action of swallowing and his taste buds went crazy in reaction to the sweetness of the liquid._

_“What is this?” He grunted, examining the contents of the glass._

_“Sugar water.” The doctor answered, handing him a small white paracetamol tablet. “Take it with this, it’ll make you feel a bit better.”_

_Jason did as he was told before he realised the pain that shot through his side. He looked down to find it bandaged up, the white cloth wrapped all the way round his body._

_“What happened?” He asked, lying back as the pain shooting through him became too much._

_“We found you in a car, slowly bleeding to death.” The doctor answered, turning off the generator and monitor. “You had a knife in you and were pretty badly beaten. We took you in.”_

_The older man sat on the edge of the bed by Jason’s legs._

_“I’m a doctor. We managed to stitch you up and get some fluids in you.” The doctor explained, still smiling. “We also decided to give you a much needed shave and haircut.”_

_“Where’s my bag?!” Jason asked quickly, his memory starting to come back as the sugar in his system got to work._

_“On the chair beside you.” The doctor gestured to the bag. “We only took away your weapons to be safe.”_

_“Where are we?” Jason asked again, calming down._

_“In what is left of Harrison Memorial Hospital.” The older man answered. “You’re safe for now.”_

_Jason nodded and relaxed slightly. He had to admit that the bed was indeed comfortable. Better than hard ground any day._

_“We assumed your name to be Jason from your bag.” The man continued. “That is your name, isn’t it?”_

_Jason nodded slowly._

_“I’m Bill.” The man finally introduced himself. “Rest a little longer and come out when you feel strong enough. Your clothes are just underneath your bag.”_

_With that said along with a nod from Jason, Bill stood back up and left the ward, closing the door gently behind him._

It was morning and the sun shone through the windows of the house. The street outside was quiet yet again and the birds chirped happily up in the trees. Carl sat at the dining table of the house, his hat on the table next to him as he ate his morning breakfast of dry cereal. He had been surprised to wake up in his bed as he could only remember falling asleep on the front room floor next to Jason. Someone must have carried him into bed.

Michonne’s approach removed him from his thoughts. He turned his head and looked at her as she placed her own bowl down on the table. Carl instantly noticed that she had changed clothes as she now wore a slightly oversized white shirt. It was a striking contrast to her previous fashion sense. He couldn’t help but laugh as she placed a couple water bottles on the table. Michonne stood back and rolled up the sleeves of the shirt.

“Do you have something to say about my extremely comfortable and attractive shirt?” She asked the boy with a grin.

Carl couldn’t help but grin and laugh as he answered. “No, no, no, it…it looks great.”

He then pointed at her stomach. “Oh uh, you missed a…” He pointed out she had missed one of the buttons, his sentence trailing off as she did the button up.

Michonne sat down and filled her bowl with what was left of the cereal in the packet.

“Wish we had some soy milk.” She mused with a smile.

“Seriously?” Carl asked with an incredulous look.

“Yes, seriously!” Michonne retorted. “Have you ever tried it?”

“My best friend in third grade, he was allergic to dairy.” Carl told her with a smile. “And every day he would bring this soy stuff to lunch. I tried it.”

“And?” Michonne asked, curious.

“I threw up!” Carl declared with a cheeky smile.

Michonne couldn’t help but grin. “Yeah right!”

“Alright, alright, I almost threw up.” Carl confessed the truth. “But I was like…”

Carl made a noise and lurched forward, as if he was throwing up to emphasise his disgust for soy milk. This was enough to have Michonne laughing.

“It was so gross! Like literally!” Carl exclaimed. “I’d rather have powdered milk than to have to drink that stuff again!”

Michonne continued to laugh as she leaned forward to start eating.

“I’d rather have Judith’s formula!” Carl declared and froze. Heartbreak stabbing into him like a sword.

Michonne also froze. Her face cold with the pain of loss.

Carl got up and rushed away from the table, leaving Michonne alone at the table with her thoughts.

Jason came in from the backdoor after getting some fresh hair as he saw Carl approach.

“Morning.” He greeted with a smile.

Carl didn’t look or speak. He just zoomed past the young man. Jason didn’t take offence. He could tell something had upset Carl, so he walked through to the dining room and made eye contact with Michonne. Her face told him all that he needed to know. Heartbreak. Like Michonne, he decided to give Carl space.

Jason left Michonne where she was and headed upstairs to retrieve his bag and place a new tally mark in his notebook. Michonne finished eating and headed for the kitchen. Rick was there, making himself something to eat that wasn’t cereal. He was sick of cereal.

“Thank you.” He said to her with a soft smile. “I heard him laughing in there. Almost forgot what that sounded like.”

Michonne let her eyes wander around the room. Rick wasn’t aware that the laughter had almost ended in tears. Rick walked over to the table in the centre of the kitchen.

“I can’t be his father and his best friend. He needs you and Jason.” Rick told her. “I know that’s a lot to ask, so if you feel you need a break…”

Michonne snapped her head up. “I’m done taking breaks.”

Rick nodded in understanding.

“What was the argument about?” Michonne asked him. “Between you and Jason.”

Rick thought for a moment, trying to figure out how best to word his explanation.

“He caught me looking in his bag.” Rick confessed. “The fifth person he killed was his boyfriend. He feels guilty.”

“Why? Was it in cold blood or a mercy killing?” Michonne asked, stepping forward.

“Sounds like a mercy killing.” Rick answered. Pain flashed through his face. “It haunts him.”

“Just like Lori haunts you.” Michonne finished for him, sympathy in her eyes.

“Lori and everyone else at the prison.” Rick breathed out painfully in memory.

Michonne leaned back against the counter as Rick turned around. She knew better than to push the point and let the subject drop.

“So what’s the plan?” She asked. “Is this place home or just a stop along the way?”

Rick turned back around after thinking for a moment. “Let’s just stay here while we figure it out.”

Rick stared at Michonne, as if asking for her permission to stay at the house a little longer. Michonne nodded her head in acceptance and leaned forward off the counter.

“We should finish checking those houses.” She said, preparing to head to the door.

“I’ll come too.” Rick offered.

Michonne narrowed her eyes. “You were in agony yesterday.”

Rick shrugged. “I feel fine today.”

“We need you strong.” Michonne countered. “Just rest. Just one more day.”

She grabbed a bag from the counter and walked out of the kitchen to get her sword. When she returned to the front room, Carl was standing there. His hat was on his head and he had put on a dark blue and grey chequered shirt. He had been listening and was ready to go on the run.

Jason descended down the stairs as Michonne placed her sword on her back.

“If you’re going out on a run I’ll come too.” He offered, putting his bag on.

“No.” Michonne answered. “You were up all night. Stay with Rick and rest.”

Jason felt like protesting but he knew how stubborn Michonne could be in an argument and how intimidating she could be. He sighed and passed his bag to Carl.

“Here. Take my bag.” He told the teen. “Better to have both hands free as often as possible.”

Carl put the bag on his shoulders and nodded without saying a word. He and Michonne moved the couch and opened the front door, stepping out onto the porch.

Rick and Jason followed them out onto the porch.

“How long do you think you’ll be?” Rick asked, looking out at the street.

“Couple houses shouldn’t take long.” Michonne responded. “We’ll be back by noon.”

Rick nodded and checked the watch Carol had given him. “It’s eight-fifteen now.”

Rick handed his revolver to Carl. “Now you follow her lead, you understand?”

Carl nodded and stuffed the revolver into the back of his belt. He was being unusually quiet, prompting Rick to take notice.

“Everything okay?” He asked in concern.

Carl thought for a moment. The heartbreak of losing everyone at the prison was stabbing his heart. The loss of his baby sister was tearing his heart to pieces and he knew his father and Jason had a fight the night before. The idea of leaving them alone could be troubling. Everything was not okay. Everything was the furthest thing from okay.

“Yeah.” Carl lied. “I’m just hungry.”

Michonne narrowed her eyes. His lie was obvious to her but apparently not so obvious to Rick, who patted his son on the shoulder.

“Alright. I’ll see you in a couple of hours.” He told his son and let them turn to leave.

“Hey Carl!” Jason called, getting the teen to turn back round to look at him. “I’m going to want that bag brought back in one piece, okay?”

Carl knew Jason was trying to be friendly. Trying to be fun. His smile proved it. Carl wasn’t in the mood for any of it so he simply nodded and continued to walk with Michonne.

Jason turned to Rick once they were out of hearing range.

“Something’s bothering him.” He commented to the bearded man.

“Yeah, I know.” Rick rasped, turning back towards the door. “Just give him some space for now.”

Jason wasn’t so sure it was the best thing to do. He knew how much pain Carl had to carry but he wasn’t about to tell Rick how to be a father. Not if he wanted to keep his head on his shoulders. The two males closed the door behind them and barricaded it with the couch once again.

“I’m sorry for not telling you about my boyfriend sooner.” Jason apologised, standing in front of Rick. “I should have got over the pain and been honest and clear.”

Rick studied him for a moment, looking into his eyes. “It’s alright. We all have things we don’t like talking about. Things that we’ve had to do.”

Jason nodded in agreement. Both men had been forced to do horrendous and violent things just to stay alive. Most of these things would never be shared between them. It wouldn’t be necessary.

“But Rick, don’t go snooping in my bag again. You have no idea what kind of creatures live in there.” Jason joked to lighten the mood. “I’d hate for you to end up losing your hand.”

Rick smiled at this but also took in the polite request for future privacy. He would respect it. Jason was no longer considered a potential threat. They would still have a long way to go before he would be fully trusted but Rick was happy to have him stay.

“I’m going to head upstairs, read a book. Maybe sleep a while.” Rick told him. “Wake me if I’m asleep when they get back.”

Jason nodded. “Sure thing. I’ll be out on the roof or something.”

Rick nodded and headed up the stairs after grabbing a book from one of the shelves. Jason followed him up the stairs but instead of lying on one of the beds with a book, he climbed out one of the windows and lay on the roof to relax under the warmth of the sun.

 

Carl closed the door to the house he and Michonne had just finished raiding for supplies. Their bags were now half full. He didn’t feel comfortable having Jason’s bag on his back but he had worked out that it was probably to prevent his father’s prying eyes from getting to it again. He walked silently alongside Michonne, his gaze set ahead of him almost as if she wasn’t even next to him. Michonne didn’t feel at ease with such an uncomfortable silence from Carl and decided to try to get him talking.

“Find anything good?” She asked. “Candy bars? Comic books? Crazy cheese?”

Carl had ignored her up until crazy cheese. He had never heard of that before so he turned and gave her a confused look. The black samurai whipped out a tall can with a yellow aerosol top.

“Bam! Crazy cheese!” Michonne exclaimed with a grin. “Found it still sealed and everything. Now I’ll be nice and let you have the first pull.”

Carl lifted his hand though it was weighed down by one of the supply bags.

“No thanks.”

Michonne slowed her walk, surprised at his negative response.

“You sure?” She asked, hoping he’d change his mind.

Carl nodded before looking ahead again. “I’m fine.”

He started to march ahead as Michonne continued to slow down. She wasn’t prepared to put up with the negative attitude much longer. He wasn’t talking and wasn’t saying why so she let her patience dissolve and called him out on it.

“You don’t seem fine.” She declared, causing the boy to stop in his tracks.

Carl felt irritated by her statement. Of course he wasn’t actually fine. How could he be? All his friends were probably dead, or if they were alive they were probably too far away by now. They had lost their home and were now scavenging for supplies on a daily basis with no clear idea of what to do. It wasn’t a life. It was nothing compared to what the prison had been. Every time they felt like they could catch their breath something always happened to ruin it. People would die and they would be back on the road again. Jason’s actions had proven to Carl that the deep pain he felt was never going to go away. It was only going to get worse as more people around him died. Who would be next, his dad, Michonne or Jason? People had died in the past because he was too young or too weak to do anything to stop it. He hated it. He was sick of being the weakest link. He turned back to Michonne.

“I’m just tired.” He lied. Just like he had lied to his father earlier that morning.

Michonne relented her attempts to get him to talk and simply nodded. She increased her pace to catch up to him as the teen had marched off at a quicker pace than before.

As she caught up she reared her head back and sprayed some of the crazy cheese in her mouth, making raspy noises like a walker as she did so. Carl turned to watch her, she rasped at him with a mouthful of crazy cheese, the yellow strings covering her chin as well. Carl didn’t seem to react and turned his gaze ahead of them yet again. Michonne stood, feeling slightly rejected and swallowed the crazy cheese that was in her mouth before wiping the rest from her lips.

As they ascended the stairs to another house’s door she decided to apologise for bothering the boy so much. The aggressive approach hadn’t worked nor had the comical approach.

“I’m sorry. I’m not very good at making boys your age laugh.” She apologised as she looked through the dirty glass of the door, banging it to attract any walkers that might be inside.

Carl realised he was being a bit too cold. “I was laughing. Inside.”

Michonne continued banging on the door. “Toddlers find me funny, two, three year olds.”

Carl’s face scrunched up in confusion. “What do you mean _toddlers_?”

Michonne turned to face him, her face was calm as she reflected and opened up. If Carl wouldn’t open up then she would instead.

“I had a three year old son.” She smiled. “He happened to find me extremely funny.”

She stepped forward and opened the door with her hand clutching the handle of her sword should it be needed. She stepped into the front room as Carl followed behind her, closing the door and dropping a couple of the bags to the floor. He pulled out Rick’s revolver as Michonne placed her own bags on the couch.

“We need food, batteries and water in that order.” She told him, opening one of the cupboards and searching inside it.

Carl felt hurt at never having been told such important information about her past. He challenged her.

“Why didn’t you ever tell me you had a kid? What was his name?” Carl asked as Michonne continued to search, pain rising through her chest. “Did you have any others? Were you married?”

Michonne turned to him before walking past him to get some space, raising pointing finger at him.

“I’ll answer one question at a time, one room at a time and only after we’ve cleared it.” She told him.

Carl nodded as she disappeared into the next room. Another game to find out the truth. This was starting to become a habitual thing for him between Jason and Michonne.

 

Jason opened his eyes. He had been dozing on the roof but now he heard voices in the street outside. Male voices. He peered round the side of the building and saw a large group of men walking up to the front porch. He scrambled to get back inside just as he heard the front door rammed open, the couch screeching across the floor. Jason galloped into Rick’s room to wake the bearded man who was lying on the bed with an open copy of “Selected Short Stories” by Jack London on his chest. He quickly shook Rick awake. Rick gave him a confused look that faded into a serious one as a result of the tense expression on Jason’s face.

Jason didn’t need to say a word. He heard the male voices downstairs. Loud. Boisterous. Aggressive. Two were arguing. There was a thud. Then a scream of pain. They laughed. He heard them loudly ascending the stairs. Jason darted into the wardrobe while Rick grabbed his book, his water bottle and the watch before sliding under the bed.

One man was searching the rooms. Old, dirty jeans and dirty boots were all Rick could make out along with the assault rifle they carried in their hand. The man stepped into the room and stood at the foot of the bed. Rick practically held his breath, praying he wouldn’t be discovered. Jason did the same. Jason’s life depended on this man not needing new clothes. The man kicked a jacket that lay on the floor and opened the cupboard by the door. He slammed the cupboard shut and walked over to the wardrobe. Jason cursed inside his head and took a knife out of one of the pockets in his cargos. He held it at eye level and waited for the door to open. The man glanced back at the bed and instead of opening the wardrobe door he wandered back over to the bed. Rick was dripping with nervous sweat, his hands shaking as he watched the man’s steps. The man’s boots were covered in dry blood stains. The stranger then lay himself on the bed, the bottom of the bed rapidly lowering and hitting Rick on the back of the head. Rick silently cursed and prayed the man hadn’t noticed the resistance. Jason watched as the man closed his eyes and prepared to sleep as the others talked loudly downstairs.

 

Michonne observed one of the many paintings that hung on the walls of the house. They had all been painted by the previous owners of the house and were very artistic and beautiful. The painter could have been professional. Carl came up behind her, pocketing the last of the useful supplies.

“What was your son’s name?” He asked, resting his arm on the top of a wooden chair.

Michonne smiled. “I said after.”

“Well, these are actually two separate rooms and we already cleared that one.” Carl answered, gesturing to the front room.

Michonne smiled and turned round. “Andre. His name was Andre Anthony.”

Michonne headed for the hallway and pointed to one of the sets of drawers that hadn’t been checked. “Make sure there isn’t a box of cookies hiding in there.”

Carl walked over to the drawer. “Did you have any other kids?”

Michonne was now in the hallway, looking at the other paintings. “Rules of the game, my friend!”

Carl searched the drawer and found some candy. He pocketed them and entered the hallway behind Michonne.

“So, did you?” He asked.

Michonne smiled again. “You know you could be a spy or a _cop_.”

Carl folded his arms and leaned against a small table that sat in the hallway. Michonne turned back to him, averting her gaze from the paintings.

“No. One was enough for me.” She told him, smiling. “And Andre was a handful, like you.”

This earned a small chuckle from Carl. “Does this hallway count as a room?”

Michonne turned her attention to another painting. “If you can find something we can use.”

Carl turned and wandered down the hallway. He found a painting that was wrapped in a plastic sheet leaning against a door. He picked it up and brought it to Michonne.

“This is the only thing I could find.” He said to her, looking at the large object. “Does it count?”

Michonne took the painting from him, holding onto it so it didn’t fall flat on the floor. “So?”

Carl folded his arms and thought for a moment. This next question would probably hurt the most for his friend but he needed to know.

“How long has it been?” He finally asked.

Michonne’s face contorted with heartbreak as she thought about it. How long had it been? She never kept track of days. She wasn’t like Jason.

“It happened after…after everything happened.” She admitted, being unable to say a time.

Carl nodded in thought. “Does my dad know?”

Michonne stared at the wall in reflection. “I never told him. I never told anyone. Until just now.”

Carl thought for a moment. That was a big revelation. He was the first person she had ever opened up to since the world ended. He was the one person she trusted above everyone else. He smiled.

“Your secret is safe with me.” Carl declared with confidence.

Michonne considered his words for a moment. “It’s not really a secret.”

Carl continued to smile. “It’s still safe with me.”

This earned him a smile back from Michonne.

Carl considered something. He debated in his mind whether or not he should ask Michonne a question that had been nagging away at him all day. He let out a sight. It wouldn’t hurt to ask, especially after how open Michonne had been with him.

“How…how do you know if you…you know… _like_ someone?” He asked, hesitant. What would she think of him? She was perceptive so she would either figure out his reasons for asking right away or get the totally wrong idea.

Michonne couldn’t help but smile. The question had come out of nowhere but it also made sense for Carl to ask. She assumed he had probably never had any relationships because of the apocalypse. If he was asking this now then that meant he liked someone but the options were extremely limited. She and Rick couldn’t possibly be options, she prayed it wasn’t the case as that would be strange. That left Jason but he was a few years older than Carl and Carl didn’t appear to be gay. Not that it mattered in this world.

“Well, you enjoy their company. You find them attractive, catch yourself admiring their face or their body.” Michonne explained, not feeling the need to be subtle. “You can be protective of them. You want to spend time with them, to be close to them, touch them, kiss them and _other things_.”

Carl looked down, his hat obscuring his face from view as he thought about it. That did sound about right and would explain the things he saw in movies his mother used to watch. It also explained the actions and connection that Glenn and Maggie appeared to share. So that’s what liking someone was. He figured love would be an escalation of those feelings but he had to be sure.

“Is love just a stronger version of that?” He asked carefully.

Michonne looked serious as she answered. “Love is not a name given to something. Love is an action. It is something you act on.”

Carl nodded. That was a very profound idea. If you loved someone you had to act on it, you had to prove it with actions and not just words. The breakdown of his parents’ relationship began to make more and more sense now that he thought about love in that way.

“Did you meet someone when I wasn’t watching?” Michonne asked him with a teasing grin.

Carl’s face heated up, his cheeks flushing red at her statement. He hoped they were obscured by his hat so she couldn’t see the answer to her question covering his face.

“No…I was just wondering.” He answered. He needed to add something convincing. “Glenn once teased me, said he could tell I liked Beth.”

Michonne narrowed her eyes but continued to smile.

“And did you?” She asked. It hurt that past tense was used not because his feelings probably faded but that Beth was probably dead.

Carl shook his head. “No. She was like a big sister but I didn’t _like_ her.”

Michonne accepted the answer for the time being and allowed Carl to search one of the adjacent rooms, his father’s revolver raised at all times should a walker be lurking inside. She picked up the painting and pulled off the plastic to discover that the last painting was that of death. Of a walker. Suspicion shot through her and she stared at the door that Carl had retrieved the painting from.

Michonne put the painting down and headed slowly down the hall towards the door that the painting came from. She clutched the handle of her sword and opened the door. On the other side there was a sink with children’s toothbrushes and a couple stuffed animals alongside toothpaste and soap. The mirror was fogged up with condensation of some kind. Michonne opened the next door to reveal a children’s playroom which spiders had since taken over, evidenced by the number of webs that covered objects in the room.

The room was for toddlers, no older than her own son had been by the looks of things. It pulled at her heartstrings. These innocent children so full of life were gone. Probably dead. Born into a world that would become a brutal battle for survival. She really missed Andre but at the same time felt glad that he didn’t have to feel fear anymore. Michonne continued to the pink door at the end of the room and opened it. The room was a bedroom, decorated almost exclusively in pink. Michonne froze.

On the bed in the middle of the room were the corpses of a man and a woman, gunshots to their heads. On the bed on the right lay the corpses of two young girls, their teddy bears still in their arms. Michonne stood over them and couldn’t stop the tears from dripping from her eyes, quickly wiping them away. She turned to discover a third, slightly older child’s corpse sat on a chair. This whole family had died in the room together. As tragic as it was at least they were all together again in a much better place. At least she hoped so.

Michonne rushed for the door, unable to stand in that room any longer. It wasn’t a room. It was a graveyard. She slammed the door behind her and put her weight against it as Carl came in to find her. He saw the painful look on her face.

“Everything okay?” He asked her, concerned.

“Yeah it’s fine.” Michonne answered a little too quickly. She wouldn’t move from the door.

Carl took a step forward and studied the pink paint of the door. “There’s a baby in there.”

Michonne put on her best poker face as she corrected him. “A dog.”

Carl nodded and looked down at the floor, his hat obscuring his face from view again. He took a few moments to gather his thoughts. Michonne had opened up to him like never before and he had failed to tell her what had been bothering him this whole time. That had to change.

“My dad let me name her.” He said, thinking about his baby sister, Judith. “Maybe…maybe her and Andre are…together somewhere.”

He didn’t let the tears reach his eyes even though he knew they weren’t far away. He studied Michonne’s face as she let out a sad smile and nodded. It was a beautiful thing to suggest and it offered some strange form of comfort. Her boy wouldn’t be alone wherever he was now.

Michonne thought for a moment. This beautiful and open moment between them was the perfect time to rule in or rule out her suspicion over Carl’s earlier question.

“You said this was safe with you.” Michonne said, referring to the revelation of her son. “So I want to ask you something that can be safe with me.”

Carl thought for a moment before nodding. He owed her that much.

“Do you like Jason?” She asked. It was a blunt question and it was the only candidate she could think of.

Carl’s face flushed red at the question as he looked down at the floor yet again. Michonne couldn’t read him because his hat was in the way, something that was beginning to annoy her. She didn’t like it when she couldn’t read someone.

Carl had to really think about that. It wasn’t a question he had expected her to ask, probably because it was the very question he had been asking himself all day. Did he like Jason in that way? Was he bi or gay like Jason had explained the night before? He had no real way of knowing. He _did_ enjoy Jason’s company. He _did_ care about Jason. Was he attracted to him? Carl wasn’t sure. Even if he was, Jason probably thought too much about his dead boyfriend to consider a relationship with a “kid” like Carl.

“I…I don’t know yet.” Carl answered, finally having the courage to look Michonne right in the eye.

Michonne smiled. His uncertainty was more of a positive response than a negative one. It also meant that Carl now knew he could confide in her if his feelings did progress. She hoped he would do that as he deserved to experience something positive, something beautiful in this dark, violent world for a change.

She walked forward and placed a hand on his shoulder, guiding him towards the door.

“Come on.” She told him. “Your dad is going to start wondering where we are.”

 

Rick had waited until the man on the bed had fallen asleep as had Jason. Just as they were about to make a move another member of the group climbed the stairs and entered the room. His footsteps were enough to tell that he was heavier than the other man.

“Yo!” The new man called, banging the doorframe and waking the man on the bed. “Comfy?”

“You wakin’ me up to see if I’m comfortable?” The man on the bed snarled.

“I want to lie down.” The man at the door declared.

“Then use another bed you son of a bitch.” The man on the bed growled.

“Them’s kids beds. I want this one.” The man at the door approached the bed.

“It’s _claimed_.” The man on the bed growled.

“I didn’t hear it.” The other man retorted. “So you’re gonna have to lay claim somewhere else.”

The man on the bed stood up and swung a punch at the other man. The other man blocked the punch and started a heated scuffle as they each tried to wrestle the other to the ground. Rick began to panic beneath the bed as he could easily be discovered at this rate. He didn’t fancy his chances even with Jason in the wardrobe just a few feet away.

One of the men landed flat on his back on the floor in front of the bed with the man above attempted to bash his head against the floor. He struggled to fight back, trying to push the man’s hands and arms away so he could get back up but he was fighting a losing battle. The man above punched him, jolting his head to the side. His eyes met with Rick’s. He tried to call out but the man above wrapped an arm around his neck and began to strangle him. They continued to stare at each other as the man struggled to break free.

“Stop!” He gasped out in an effort to get the other man’s attention but to no avail.

“Hell naw!” The other man exclaimed and tightened his choke hold even more.

Before the man on the floor could attempt to voice his discovery again he passed out from lack of oxygen. The victor released him and lay on the bed.

“My bed now, jack-off!” He declared his victory and let his eyes close.

Rick was now in a difficult position. One man above him who he couldn’t check on and one man in front of him whom he prayed wouldn’t regain consciousness for a while. He would have to rely on Jason to confirm when the man on the bed was asleep.

 

After fifteen minutes or so Jason slowly and carefully opened the wardrobe door. He studied the man’s expression on the bed and it was clear he was fast asleep, his assault rifle lying next to him. Rick took the signal and slowly crawled his way out from under the bed.

“Hey! Get your asses down here!” One of the men called out as he walked up the stairs, bouncing a ball on the floor as he went, the ball making a loud bang with each bounce. Rick and Jason scrambled out of the room and headed for the bedroom with the Xbox in it.

“Yo! You hear me?” The man called out again.

Rick and Jason slithered into the Xbox room and hid on either side of the large shelves that sat at the back of the room. They held their breath as the bouncing of the ball got closer and closer.

The ball suddenly bounced on the window beside them and back into the man’s hand. He stood in between the shelves. One more step forward and he would discover Rick and Jason. Rick clenched his fist and prepared himself to fight while Jason held his knife at the ready. The ball bounced against the window again, the banging of the bounce almost deafening to their ears.

The man continued to bounce his ball on the floor and wandered off into one of the other rooms to wake the man sleeping on the bed. Taking the opportunity, Jason and Rick tried to open the windows of the room they were in but they were all locked shut.

Suddenly the men erupted into communication. It was unclear who was saying what and where they were in the house.

“Claim, claim, claim!”

“Shut the hell up! I’m trying to sleep!”

“There’s a woman shacking up in here!”

“Say what?!”

“Come on down!”

“Is she hot?!”

“Don’t grab your pecker just yet. She ain’t here!”

“What the hell are you hollering about?!”

As the men passed by the room Rick made a move over to the shelf and grabbed a trophy. It was better than nothing.

“Found her shirt. Must have washed it this morning! Smells good!”

“Oh! You found a shirt?! She could be miles away by now!”

All the men except the unconscious one in the bedroom had descended the stairs.

“Why’d she go to all the trouble of washing a shirt when she’s just gonna ditch it? She’ll be back!”

“I call first when she gets here!”

“Who knows who else she got with her?!”

“We need to be ready for anything!”

“Len, take the side room!”

Rick spotted the assault rifle that had been left on the bed and tried to go and grab it.

“Hold on, let me get a gun!”

The man named Len, who had been sleeping on the bed, thundered back up the stairs. This forced Jason to retreat into another bedroom and for Rick to retreat towards the bathroom.

“I’ll watch the front den, you’ve got the other side room!”

“Where the hell is Tony? Tony!”

“Get him the hell up!”

Rick closed the door to the bathroom and turned his head to the side. A claimer was in the room. Rick hit the man in the chest with the trophy, knocking him back and attempted to tackle him. He was still injured and didn’t have all his strength yet, allowing the man to push him over to the sink. Rick grabbed the man’s machine gun from the sink and got behind him, wrapping the strap around his neck in an attempt to strangle him. The man choked and forced Rick back against the wall but Rick refused to let go, using all his willpower to summon the strength to tighten the hold around the man’s neck. They stumbled forward as the man reached for the large pair of scissors sitting next to the sink but Rick pulled him back, knocking everything off the counter as they slammed against the door. The man forced them forward and reached for the scissors yet again, his fingers mere centimetres from grabbing them. Rick dropped them back to the floor, forcing the strap to dig into the man’s neck even more than before with the man’s own weight being his downfall. The man quickly stop struggling as he suffocated and died. Rick panted with effort and grabbed the machine gun, aiming at the door in case any of them barged in but fortunately none did allowing him to relax.

Once he got his breath back, Rick quietly opened the bathroom window and also left the door ajar. The man would turn and hopefully provide a distraction. He took the man’s machine gun and bomber jacket before stepping out the window and onto the roof. He put the strap of the machine gun round his body and wore the bomber jacket on top. As he did that, he heard the first snarls from inside the bathroom that signalled the man’s reanimation.

Rick peered over the ledge of the roof. No sign of walkers. No sign of the men. His heart sank, no sign of Jason either. He forced himself to forget about Jason for the time being. He hadn’t heard any commotion so he probably had already sneaked out. He lowered his body over the side, gripping the ledge before letting himself fall down onto the porch. He rushed down the stairs and kept his body flush with the wall. No sign of his detection.

He carefully sneaked his way round to the front porch. Carl and Michonne would be coming back soon. He had to warn them. The front door opened and the familiar sound of a ball bouncing filled the air. The older man with the ball, who appeared to be the leader, sat on the ledge of the porch with a can of fruit and stopped bouncing his ball. If Rick was going to escape he would need to get past him. Weighing his options he decided that if his walker distraction failed then he would have to shoot and run. He could afford to wait.

Rick looked further up the street and his face went pale. Carl and Michonne were almost back. He had to act. No more waiting. He took a breath and made his move but suddenly stopped as a walker could be heard snarling and shots were fired. The men started shouting at each other as even more shots echoed around the house. Someone was shooting at them. Rick let out a shaky breath. Jason must have been spotted. He had to make a decision. Save Jason or save his son. Going after Jason could result in them all dying, these men had better weapons and there were more of them. Saving his son just required him to run.

Rick sprung up from his hiding place and ran out onto the street towards Carl and Michonne, gesturing and mouthing for them to go in the opposite direction, to run. The three of them took off, leaving the gunshots behind them as they kept running and running. They didn’t think, didn’t ask any questions, they just ran.

 

It had been half an hour since they had ran away from the house. They were back to a walking pace and decided to stop next to the railway tracks to catch their breath.

“What happened?” Michonne asked, her face serious and looking for any injuries on Rick.

“Group of guys. Violent. Well-armed.” Rick answered with narrow eyes. They had been lucky to escape.

“Where’s Jason?” Carl asked, standing up to stare into his father’s eyes. If Jason was dead he needed to hear it.

Rick hesitated. Guilt surged through him. Not just for what he had done but for the pain he had inevitably chose to put his son through so he could live.

“Carl…” Rick started, looking at the ground.

“Where is he?” Carl repeated, louder and more aggressive.

Rick looked up and met his son’s glare. “I don’t know. We got separated. Those gunshots were probably his.”

“You mean you left him?” Carl snarled. “You left him to take them all on by himself?”

Rick tried to calm his son by saying his name, trying to get a word in but couldn’t.

“We should go back! We should go back and try to help him! Get revenge!” Carl shouted at his father angrily. “ _He_ wouldn’t have abandoned _us_! _He_ would have come back for _us_! But _you_ left him! _You left him_!”

“Carl, I had to do what kept you safe. That’s what matters.” Rick tried to tell his angry son. “We could have all been killed otherwise.”

“So you sacrificed him?!” Carl growled and walked away from them.

He stormed several feet away and dropped to the ground, crossing his legs and taking Jason’s bag off his back. Sofia, Dale, _Lori_ , T-Dog, Andrea, Merle, Hershel, Maggie, Beth, Glenn, Bob, Sasha, Tyreese, Daryl, Carol, _Judith_ and now Jason. All these people he had lost. All these people he could have saved. If only he had been faster, stronger, older, smarter, just better. If only he had done things differently. People kept dying around him and he seemed unable to do anything about it. Carl hugged Jason’s bag and let some tears find their way out.

“I’m sorry.” He said to the bag, as if it was a way for Jason to hear him. At least he was with his boyfriend now, along with Judith and Andre. They were in a better place.

Rick and Michonne approached the teen but he didn’t acknowledge them. He couldn’t believe his father had sacrificed his new friend, their new friend. He had ran away like a coward and had left Jason to die.

“We should count our supplies and make a plan.” Rick suggested though only Michonne paid him any attention.

Rick touched the teen on the shoulder. “Carl, we can’t stay here.”

Carl moved his shoulder, shrugging his father off.

There was a rustling in the bushes next to them. The sound of stumbling and laboured breathing. A walker. Rick reached for his revolver but realised Carl still had it. Michonne clutched her sword at the ready.

“Carl, if it’s more than one we need the gun.” Rick tried to get his son to listen. “Carl!”

Carl glared at his father before standing up and grabbing the revolver from the back of his belt. He aimed it towards the bushes with two hands, the gun heavy in his hands since he was used to his Beretta. The stumbling and breathing got louder until the figure burst out of the bushes onto the train track. Carl dropped the gun to the ground. He couldn’t believe it. Standing in front of them with a cut on his cheek but otherwise unharmed and more importantly, alive, was Jason.

Michonne lowered her sword and Rick smiled with relief. Carl collapsed to his knees from the shock of it. He couldn’t make sense of it. Jason was alive. He had taken on a group of armed men and somehow came out alive. Jason walked up to the boy and lowered himself down on one knee. Carl peered up at him from under his hat and openly accepted the hug Jason gave him. He could see the shock in the teen’s face and figured a hug was the best remedy.

He soon released Carl and stood back up before nodding to Rick, who was studying him with narrow eyes.

“What happened?” Rick asked him. He was just as surprised as Carl.

“Saw Carl and Michonne approaching. I couldn’t see you.” Jason explained. “So I opened fire and gave them a tour of the neighbourhood. The commotion attracted a group of walkers so I used them to escape.”

“What happened to your face?” Michonne asked, gesturing to the cut on his cheek that was still bleeding.

“Had to jump through a window to avoid their gunfire.” He explained. “Landed on some glass, that’s all.”

He turned back to Carl who had calmed down.

“Where’s my bag? Is it safe?” Jason asked the boy as if the bag itself was a living person.

Carl smiled and picked the bag up off the railway track and handed it back to Jason. Jason hugged it like Carl had earlier before putting it on his shoulders.

“Thank you.” He smiled to Carl.

Once the celebrations had died down and the dull reality of their situation settled back in, Jason decided to ask the all-important question.

“So what’s the plan?”

Rick thought for a moment, the three of them looking to him for answers.

“We follow the tracks for a while. Try find another house to spend the night in.” Rick explained. “We have another supplies to last a couple days.”

That seemed to satisfy them as they all started walking along the tracks. Carl stuck by Jason’s side which also happened to be the opposite side from his father. Even though Jason was alive and well it was still hard for Carl to accept that his father had actually abandoned the young man. He understood it was to keep him safe but it didn’t feel right. He didn’t agree with the decision. He let out a sigh. It didn’t matter now. They were all still together.

As they walked, Carl reached into his bag and pulled out the can of Crazy Cheese. He offered it to Michonne.

“Crazy Cheese?” He smiled.

Michonne grinned back and shook her head, declining the offer.

As Carl stuffed the can back into his bag something caught Rick’s attention. Pinned to the side of an abandoned train cart was a large sign. They all walked over for a closer look as a map was pinned just below the sign. They all read it. Rick and Michonne shared glances.

“What do you think?” Michonne asked him.

“Let’s go.” Rick stated, taking the bandage off his hand and tossing it to the ground. “Let’s go.”

Jason stood next to the sign and read it one last time.

TERMINUS. SANCTUARY FOR ALL. COMMUNITY FOR ALL. THOSE WHO ARRIVE SURVIVE.

“Hey Rick?” Jason called out, causing the trio to stop walking. Rick stared back at him.

“What’s the verdict?” Jason asked, his arms splayed out and hands open by his sides. “Do you trust me now? Am I allowed to come with you?”

Carl looked up at his father’s face. He didn’t think this was still an issue but it obviously was. They were out of the house. They were on the road. Rick had almost fully recovered. Jason wasn’t needed anymore. His heart rate increased. He wanted Jason to stay with them and was mentally preparing an argument should his father say no.

Rick smiled at the young man and nodded.

“You’re one of us.”

Carl grinned with delight. Those four words had just about redeemed his father for what happened at the house. Jason was also grinning and dashed to close the gap between them so they could all walk in a line. Michonne patted him on the back with a smile as they started the long trek towards Terminus. They didn’t know what to expect there but Jason honestly didn’t care. He had finally been accepted.

 

**Well there we go, chapter 5 is complete! This is by far the longest chapter so far and hopefully the best one so far. I kept it in line with the episode Claimed while trying to keep it as close to the episode as possible.**

**I had a lot of fun writing this one and now some of the best chapters are on the way. The trek to Terminus and Terminus itself.**

**Thanks to my chapter 4 reviewers: rk0192 and wolfbane18.**

**Also a thanks to everyone who has followed/subscribers/favourited/bookmarked or given kudos.**

**Let me know what you liked or didn’t like and why. I always want to tell the best story I can in the best way that I can. You as the reader can help me do that. Don’t be afraid to leave a review, despite my namesake I don’t usually bite. :P**

 

 


	6. Long Road Ahead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While on the way to Terminus Jason decides to teach Carl a useful skill. However, danger is never far away in this brutal world.

_It had been two days since he first woke up in the remains of the hospital. The doctor, Bill, had managed to show him around what was left of the building that they occupied. When they could they would bring people in to treat them in an attempt to increase their own numbers. Usually it was only people who were alone as whole groups could be dangerous. When he had been questioned on any alternative motivation for saving people, Bill had explained that as a doctor he had sworn to help people. It may have been the apocalypse but he still had a vow to keep. Jason had accepted that. Some people could never truly move on from the life they had before and accept the harsh reality of the apocalyptic world. Then again, it was probably for the best because if this man hadn’t had that attitude then Jason would be dead. Bled to death in the backseat floor of a car. Not a very heroic death._

_Bill had also explained that they had come to King County from the city after Atlanta simply became too dangerous to stay in. He had never specified whether or not walkers or people were to blame for that danger but Jason had assumed a mix of both. They had found the hospital abandoned though the damage to the walls, the corpses in the halls and outside, along with a cafeteria full of walkers was enough to give them an idea of what kind of atrocities had taken place. They had raided the nearby military camp for weapons and some supplies, like the electricity generators they used for the medical equipment._

_They kept themselves quiet but well-guarded. They had lookouts on the roof to spot walkers or approaching groups of people. Everyone had a job to do to try and keep the place safe and to keep people alive. It was a system and a good one. People could leave if they wanted to, they weren’t obligated to pay anything back. Bill had repeated his oath and had also felt it was not his place to control or judge anyone. Though he had noticed the scars on Jason’s arms he had never asked about them. It wasn’t necessary for him to know._

_Jason had taken into consideration the possibility of staying with them. They had food, shelter and medical supplies. They also needed able-bodied people who could go out on runs and also defend the hospital from people and walkers alike. He could find a place there. He could find purpose. The first purpose he had had in two months. His pain was still very fresh from having to put down his boyfriend. Jason remembered the promises he made. If he died defending these good people and the good work they were doing then it would be a worthy death. It wouldn’t be a cop-out or a sign of having given up. He would die doing the right thing. As morbid as he knew he sounded it was a choice that no one truly had anymore. How they would die. Death was around every corner, death was creeping up on everyone in every moment of every day. Jason wanted to be prepared for the day he faced death himself_

_One thing Jason couldn’t appreciate enough from the people there was their attitude to privacy. He had been spotted marking his tallies and crying on occasion but no one had ever asked him why. Though it is possible none of them cared, he knew that Bill did but out of respect decided not to pry. When Jason asked why he never asked personal questions he had justified it as an unwillingness to pour salt into old wounds. He had accepted that explanation given that is exactly what it would be for him._

_Jason sat on the roof of the hospital with a pair of binoculars, looking out at the ruins of the estate around them. The wind blew against his back, giving him a chill on the back of his neck that forced him to turn up the collar of his leather jacket. It was a quiet day with very few walkers to be seen. One of the newest arrivals to the place was also on the roof with him, holding a Remington 700 BDL sniper rifle. Jason didn’t like the man much, he was obnoxious, loud and loved to kill walkers a bit too much. He treated it like a game._

_Jason jumped as the man fired a shot, smashing him out of his thoughts as a walker in the street dropped dead. Jason took out his binoculars as another walker rounded the corner of the street. The sniper took another shot and put it down. Another two walkers stumbled round the corner._

_“Stop shooting!” Jason shouted. He didn’t like the idea of four walkers together._

_“Shut the fuck up, kid!” The man bellowed, firing at the two walkers. “I’m having fun here!”_

_Jason growled at the man and looked through the binoculars yet again. This time a large group of five or six walkers rounded the corner. Then another six, then another ten and then even more. Jason’s eyes widened and his hands shook. It was a herd. A big one. Even the sniper had stopped firing. Jason thought the man had finally taken the hint but had instead only stopped so he could reload. The herd was so large that the binoculars were no longer necessary. A sea of dead began to stumble towards the hospital. Jason rushed to the sniper._

_“If you keep firing you’re going to get us all killed!” He warned._

_The man snorted at him. “Killed? This is target practice! I’ve got the ammo! I’ve got the skill!”_

_“One thing you don’t have is brains.” Jason retorted and tried to grab the rifle._

_This was a big mistake as the man was older and larger than he was. He whipped the rifle out of his reach and brought the handle swinging back, striking Jason in the face, knocking him back and splitting his lower lip open. The man chortled as if enjoying the situation and started firing more and more shots at the herd. Though he was a good shot and he never missed, there were simply too many walkers for him to possibly gun down before they reached the building._

_Jason dashed for the stairwell and practically floated down it towards the man halls and wards. He had already started yelling for everybody to get out of the building. He hoped he could get the message out and get the place evacuated before the herd descended upon them and killed everyone there. Jason hadn’t counted but there had to be at least a hundred walkers in the herd if not more._

_Bill approached him, reloading an M16 assault rifle._

_“Bill, we need to leave now!” Jason ordered as he grabbed his bag._

_Bill shook his head. “I’m not leaving these patients to die here like this.”_

_“We can’t stay! The herd will tear the building down!” Jason bellowed._

_“I told you that I’m not leaving.” Bill bellowed back, his usual calm demeanour gone. “Now either stand like a man or run like a coward.”_

_“If you stay here then you’ll die and you won’t get to save anyone else!” Jason continued to plead with the older man. “We need you alive.”_

_“Those people in those wards need me. I’m not abandoning them!” Bill roared back. “If you don’t try to save one life then you’ll never save any!”_

_With that Bill rushed for the entrance to the hospital and aimed his weapon. By that point the herd were only a few feet away from the door. Several other members of the hospital group opened fire on the approaching sea of corpses, all of them with the same determination to protect their home and friends. Jason cursed and grabbed a gun from one of the boxes in the hallway. He ran to one of the ground floor windows and aimed the barrel of a Heckler & Koch PSG1 sniper rifle out the window. He started firing at the approaching wave of undead, the scope of the rifle making headshots very easy. At the same time Jason felt that the whole effort was pointless. They couldn’t kill the whole herd before it reached the doors. _

_Bill backed away from the doors to reload his M16 as the walkers finally reached the doors. A couple people who had been too caught up in shooting were overwhelmed and devoured by the advancing horde. Jason rushed from the windows as more walkers started to smash them and crawl in. The walkers dropped into the rooms from the windows and forced themselves through the doors, spilling into the hallways like a deadly liquid. The narrow nature of the hallways meant that only so many walkers could come through at a time which made it easier to shoot them but more of them just kept coming._

_Jason had discarded the empty rifle and had grabbed a police issue Remington 870 shotgun, firing it at the heads of the approaching corpses. Sweat rolled down his face as he continued firing with the other members of the hospital, his ears rang painfully from all the gunfire. Although it looked like he was standing to fight and protect the place, his mind was already trying to figure out a way to escape. All these guns and gunfire and they hadn’t even made a dent in the advancing herd. The smell was overpowering, assaulting the senses and making their eyes water as the loud chorus of undead groans and snarls filled the air. Jason couldn’t bring himself to remain in the hallway much longer. As he reloaded the shotgun, he noticed that Bill was still firing at the walkers, carefully shooting each one in the head with his M16._

_A loud crash got Jason’s attention as several more walkers had broken down various doors after entering through the ground floor windows. They were quickly filling in the entire building. Bill seemed unfazed as he continued to fire at the approaching monsters. Jason started backing up and only took shots at walkers that he felt were getting too close. Gunfire. Screams. Undead groans. The smell. It was just like that night. The night he lost his reason to live. The hospital was lost. There were too many walkers, too few people and not enough ammo. As Bill continued to shoot at the undead army Jason cursed himself and ran in the opposite direction. He owed Bill his life but Bill’s stubborn refusal to accept defeat was going to get everyone killed. Jason didn’t want to die. He wasn’t ready._

_He ran as fast as his legs could carry him, jumping over dead bodies and side stepping out of the way of the outstretched arms of hungry walkers. Any walkers that were directly in his path received a shotgun shell to the face. The shotgun was heavy in his arms as he ran but he knew he didn’t have many shells left. Jason was conservative with his shots as he ran through the hospital, he could still hear the sniper on the roof taking shots. He found a back door and shoulder barged it, expecting to slam it open but instead it refused to move and sent him crashing to the floor. He got up as fast as he could, the sounds of the undead only a few feet away from him as gunshots continued to echo through the building. Jason pulled the door open, realising the mistake he made and quickly dashed outside, slamming the door behind him to prevent any walkers from following him._

_Slamming the door was a mistake as the herd had found its way around that side of the building, the door slamming alerting the corpses to Jason’s presence. He took another two shots at the walkers, downing the two closest to him before the shotgun ran empty. As more walkers closed in on him, Jason used the handle of the gun to smack the walkers in the face and knock them to the ground. He kept swinging the shotgun, smacking every walker that got too close. Sweat dripped into his eyes, obscuring his vision, his legs shook from the adrenaline rushing through his veins and his arm muscles burned from the weight of the gun._

_As he broke free from the group of walkers that had surrounded him he realised that the only gunshots now sounding were those of the sniper. Jason spotted an abandoned bicycle and lifted it up onto its wheels. He discarded the shotgun and got on the bike before peddling as fast as he could away from the overrun hospital._

The air was starting to cool as autumn set in. The trees were beginning to turn brown as they shed their leaves which would fall onto the disused train tracks that Rick, Michonne, Carl and Jason now walked along. Rick took the lead, walking at the front of the group with his hands in the pockets of his bomber jacket and the machinegun he took from the house strapped round him, hanging by his side. Jason walked next to him, the width of the track separating them as he too kept his gloved hands inside the pockets of his leather jacket. A gentle breeze blew his hair into his eyes, forcing him to shake his head as he refused to remove his hands from his pockets. He didn’t speak as he was far too consumed in his thoughts. For the first time in months, it felt good to feel like he belonged somewhere. Jason had been on his own for far too long and though he suspected he would always feel empty and alone without his loved ones from before, he had no intention of abandoning the group he now found himself in.

A few feet behind Rick and Jason, Carl and Michonne walked side by side. There was plenty of talking and some laughs as they were currently playing eye spy. Though there was never a lot to play it with as their scenery didn’t often change it was still something to pass the time with.

“Eye spy with my little eye something beginning with T.” Michonne challenged the teen.

Carl looked around for a moment before quickly working it out. “Tracks! The train tracks.”

Michonne grinned and nodded. It was Carl’s turn.

“Eye spy something beginning with R.” Carl announced, grinning. He hoped it would be tricky.

Michonne looked around and thought for a moment. “Rick?”

Carl shook his head and let out a giggle. “Try again.”

Michonne narrowed her eyes and looked around more carefully. That’s when she saw it. The Colt Python holstered on Rick’s leg.

“Revolver!” Michonne answered, staring at Carl for confirmation.

Carl grinned and nodded.

Michonne hummed in thought as she looked around for a new object to keep Carl guessing with. Once her eyes settled on something, she turned back to Carl as they walked.

“Eye spy something beginning with H.” Michonne announced with a smile.

Carl looked around but couldn’t find anything that started with that letter. He knew Michonne wouldn’t trick him so he looked ahead of them into the distance and saw a street. Obscured by the leaves and branches of a large tree was the roof of a building, most likely a house.

“House!” Carl declared with a proud smile.

Upon the declaration of a house Jason decided to walk a little faster. He too had spotted the house and was considering whether it was worth diving in to check for supplies. He turned to Rick.

“What do you think?” He asked. “Should we give it a try?”

Rick looked over at the house, his eyes narrow from the low position of the sun that made it blast light into his face. He shrugged and started walking towards the house.

“It’s not like we’re in a rush.” Rick commented as he passed Jason, leading them all towards the building.

As the four of them walked up the deserted street three mutilated corpses came into view. Beside the half-eaten remains were bags and weapons. There was still a strong smell and plenty of fresh blood on the ground indicating that these survivors had died recently. They examined the bodies for a cause of death but couldn’t find one. Either the walkers had eaten the evidence or the walkers themselves were the cause of death.

Holding their breath to defend their senses from the stench of death, Rick and Jason raided the pockets and bags of the bodies. They picked up the guns but found them to be empty so they left them with the bodies. The supplies found on the bodies weren’t numerous but they were something. Some chocolate, a can of fruit, a couple knives, rope and some tape. They stuffed the supplies into their bags before walking past the remains towards the house.

The front porch of the house was painted with dried blood. Michonne readied her sword while Rick, Carl and Jason held their guns at the ready as Rick broke down the door and stormed inside. As they had expected, a group of four walkers were in the front rooms and began shuffling over to them. Rick flipped his gun round in his hand and used the handle to cave in the forehead of the closest walker. Michonne swung her sword with deadly accuracy and sliced the head of another walker in two. Jason had holstered his gun and took out his knife which he used to stab a walker in the forehead before Rick grabbed the final walker and slammed its head into the wall. They took a quick break to get their breath back and wiped the blood off their weapons.

There was a snarl and a loud repetitive crash as a walker came tumbling down the staircase, its bones snapping and breaking with each loud thud from its rotting body. It landed on the floor, reaching up at them with broken arms and wrists as it growled before Michonne stabbed it in the temple with her sword.

Rick and Michonne immediately started looking in cupboards and drawers for supplies. Carl leaned against the wall with his arms folded, his gun already holstered. Jason could tell something was bothering the boy so he decided to approach him before looking for supplies.

“Hey.” He greeted as he walked up to Carl.

Carl continued to stare at the floor as he answered. “Hey.”

“What’s bothering you?” Jason asked, lifting Carl’s hat to look him in the eye.

Carl glared before lowering his hat again, knocking his heel against the wall that he was leaning on.

“Nothing.” Carl answered. “It’s stupid.”

Jason let out a light laugh. “You think I care if it’s stupid or not?”

Carl looked up at him and thought for a moment. He sighed and decided to be honest.

“I just feel weak. All of you can kill walkers without a gun.” Carl explained. “But I need a gun.”

Jason cocked his head to the side like a dog would and smiled.

“Is that all?” He asked. “That’s easily fixed.”

Carl looked confused. How could his lack of physical size and strength be easily fixed?

Jason glanced outside onto the street and saw two walkers stumbling towards the house they were currently in. He smirked. They would be perfect. He turned to Carl and handed him a knife.

“Come with me.” He told him.

Carl was a little confused but he trusted Jason enough to follow him outside to the street where the walkers could see them. Their snarls were loud and hungry. Jason waved his hands and got their attention. He kicked one of the walkers onto its back and led the other one further out onto the street.

“Okay, Carl.” Jason called. “Watch this. Kick their knees to knock them down first.”

Jason did as he had just explained to Carl. He advanced on the walker and stepped to the side of it before kicking its knee as hard as he could. The brittle bone of the decomposing walker’s leg snapped and the corpse fell to the ground. Jason took his knife and quickly stabbed it in the head. He looked over to Carl to see if the young teen had seen it all. Carl nodded.

Jason put his knife away and took out his gun. He aimed it at the other walker which had finally stood up again.

“Okay Carl.” He called. “Your turn.”

Jason kept his aim firmly on the walker just in case something went wrong. Carl clutched the knife tightly and moved towards the shambling corpse. Just as Jason had shown him a moment before, he stepped to the side and kicked the walker’s knee. The walker collapsed to the floor allowing him to stab it in the back of the head with ease. He pulled the knife out of the skull and looked up at Jason with a smile.

Jason gave him a small applause after he holstered his gun again. He grinned. Carl learned fast.

“Very good. Now you can take them out easily without a gun.” Jason told the teen. “It’s also useful if you need to get away from them without actually killing them.”

At this point, Rick and Michonne came out and saw the two dead walkers along with Jason and Carl talking.

“What happened?” Rick asked them.

“Just showing Carl an easier way to deal with walkers.” Jason answered honestly, deciding it best not to lie to Rick under any circumstance.

Rick nodded. The lesson has obviously been a success as both walkers now lay on the street with holes in their skulls. He stared at his son.

“Be careful. It’s easy to forget how dangerous they are sometimes.” Rick told him.

Carl nodded to his father but couldn’t help but share a cheeky smirk with Jason. Although it was a fairly simple thing in the world they lived in, it had made Carl feel better and had also cheered him up a bit. It was appreciated.

“Find anything useful?” Jason asked Rick.

“Not much but it’s better than nothing.” Rick answered with a nod.

Upon seeing Michonne’s sword, Carl’s memory jogged itself back into action.

“You still gonna teach me how to use that?” Carl asked her, gesturing to the sword.

Michonne smiled and nodded. Carl smiled back excitedly. Rick remained serious however. Though he understood it was important for Carl to be able to defend himself he still felt it was a failure on his part as a parent for it to be necessary at all. Without speaking he led them back down the street to the tracks so they could continue the walk to Terminus.

 

A couple hours later and the sun had just about set for the day. The group had set up camp in some dense woodland just off from the railway line. They had used some string and rope to build a large rectangle around them between the trees with empty cans hanging on it. This would act as an alarm should any walkers find them during the night. They had just finished eating but kept the fire lit to give them light and some warmth. Before lighting the fire they had dug a small hole for it to sit in so it could burn bigger and brighter but still be hard to see. Jason lay on his back, using his bag as a pillow as he stared up at the night sky through the branches, observing the stars. The nights were getting colder. Rick wore his bomber jacket, Michonne wore a dark yellow jacket and Jason wore his signature leather aviator jacket. Carl shivered. He was the only one without something warmer to wrap up in.

Jason noticed Carl shiver out of the corner of his eye. Michonne was sharpening her sword and Rick was cleaning out the group’s guns. He sat up and unzipped his leather jacket, pulling it off before handing it to Carl. Carl looked back slightly confused.

“Won’t you get cold without it?” Carl asked but took the jacket as Jason continued to force it into his hands.

“I’ll be fine.” He answered. “We’ll find something for you in the morning.”

“Thanks.” Carl nodded and put the jacket on. It was too big for him but it was better that way as it covered more of his body and kept him warm.

Jason lay back like before and continued to look at the stars. He felt the cool air chill his skin through his black shirt but he did his best to ignore it. One thing he didn’t mind about a world without electricity lighting everything up was being able to see the stars without any kind of light pollution. He smiled.

“You seem happy for someone who has to sleep outside with walkers.” Michonne pointed out, tapping his foot with the sheath of her sword.

Jason’s smile grew. He continued to look up at the stars as he answered.

“Walkers are a minor issue.” He commented. “But I’ve always loved nature and looking at the stars.”

“Are you trying to say you prefer it?” Michonne asked him, half expecting him to say yes.

“No but I’ll enjoy the opportunity.” Jason answered. “I always would. Even before.”

“What did you do before all this?” Rick asked him, having finished cleaning the guns.

Jason sat up and crossed his legs. “I was a university student.”

“What were you studying?” Michonne asked him before Rick could, though they both had the same question.

“Biology. I wanted to save endangered animal.” Jason answered and let out a half-hearted chuckle. “Now human beings are going extinct. I guess the animals will be fine now.”

“There will be others.” Rick argued. “We’re not as close to extinction as you think.”

“We’ll see.” Jason answered cynically. “What about you, Rick? What were you?”

“Sheriff Deputy” Rick answered.

Jason let out a laugh. “And I have a criminal record.”

“For what?” Rick asked. The tone was light but he had to make sure it was nothing serious.

“Assault.” Jason replied honestly. “I got into fights now and again.”

“Why?” Carl asked. He didn’t see Jason as a particularly violent or antagonistic person.

“When people would bully my friends and words didn’t seem to work.” Jason answered with a sigh, remembering each fight. “I’d try to educate them with my fists.”

“Did it work?” Carl asked.

“Usually.” Jason replied with a chuckle. “Not that your dad would have approved at the time.”

Jason lay back again, looking up at the stars. “What about you Michonne?”

“It doesn’t matter what I was.” She answered, still protective of her past.

“Exactly, so you won’t be judged.” Jason retorted. “Tell us.”

Michonne sighed. “I was a lawyer.”

Jason laughed again. “Great, I’m with a policeman and a lawyer. I better not lie!”

Carl couldn’t help but laugh with him, quickly followed by Michonne and even Rick to a lesser extent. Though their laughter could attract walkers or people, moments of joy and happiness were essential. Life couldn’t always be about survival and death. Their laughter quickly faded and was replaced by silence as they tried to get what little sleep they could.

 

_Sirens blared loudly as emergency vehicles sped past the house. People were in a panic, some trying to evacuate, others gathering supplies and attempting to barricade and fortify their houses. The news reports were hard to believe, like something out of a horror movie. Jason couldn’t quite fathom what he was seeing and hearing. The news was reporting that the dead were returning to life and attacking the living. The dead were returning to life and attacking the living. It just didn’t sound real. Not even the imaginative minds of horror stories had ever came up with something like that. Monsters, werewolves, vampires and other creatures, sure but living dead? That was new. Jason pondered it in his head. What would that make them? Undead?_

_He glanced out the window and that’s when he saw one of them. One of these undead. They were a lot more obvious to spot than he would have expected. Torn clothes, grey skin and a shambolic walk. People were running from it as it tried to grab whoever came too close. One man decided to take it on. He was either brave or stupid. He shot it in the chest three times with his Smith & Wesson Model 629 Classic revolver and was shocked to see the magnum bullets had no effect on the advancing creature. The man aimed his gun again to try and shoot three more times but the monster had closed the gap between them and grabbed his arm before knocking him to the floor. Once on the ground it viciously sank its teeth into his jugular causing blood to spray everywhere as the man shrieked in pain and fear. _

_Sirens grew louder and drew closer before a police car pulled up in the street. An older officer got out of the vehicle and pulled out a Beretta 92FS which he used to shoot the cannibalistic monster in the head. That one shot had clearly killed the creature. Jason took note. These things could be killed with a headshot. Body shots did nothing. The police officer also shot the dead man in the head before rushing towards Jason’s house. Jason had recognised the officer as his father and rushed to unlock the door, letting the man in quickly before slamming it behind him._

_“Dad? What’s going on?” Jason asked his father who looked visibly shaken._

_“It’s worse than they’re telling you on the television.” His father answered. “If you have to fight one of those things attack the head and only the head. Do you understand?”_

_Jason nodded quickly. “Yeah, I saw you shoot that one outside.”_

_“Don’t get bitten.” His father continued. “Bites kill you and make you one of them.”_

_Jason looked utterly gobsmacked. “What?”_

_His father narrowed his eyes. “Dead people are walking and attacking us and their bite being infectious is difficult for you?”_

_Jason shook his head and averted his gaze for a moment to regain some of his composure._

_“Okay, okay, I’ve got it.” He answered. “Don’t get bitten.”_

_“Where’s your mother and Kellin? Still upstairs?” His father asked quickly._

_Jason nodded. “Yeah, they’re safe.”_

_His father shook his head. “No, they’re not. We need to make this place secure.”_

_“This news says we should go to Atlanta.” Jason told his father, his hand gesturing at the television._

_“Thousands of people going there will just be chaos.” His father told him. “We’re safer at home and away from people.”_

_“What if you’re wrong?” Jason questioned his father’s judgement._

_“Then one of my friends over in King County will let me know.” His father answered._

_“A friend?” Jason questioned, unsure of who is father was talking about._

_“Deputy Shane Walsh is heading to Atlanta.” His father told him. “You remember him, don’t you? Your old gun instructor.”_

_Jason did indeed remember Shane. Despite not being a member of the force, Shane had taught Jason how to use a gun because his father was a fellow officer. Whenever criminals passed between their counties they would often work together and had a good relationship as a result._

_“At least it’s someone we can trust.” Jason answered, nodding._

_“I’ll keep watch for a bit.” His father told him, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Feel free to go upstairs.”_

_Jason nodded and hugged his father who returned the hug. They knew that the world was falling apart outside but they were still a family. They were all still together and they had faith in each other._

_When they separated Jason made his way upstairs. When he opened the door he found his mother and boyfriend watching the news together. His mother got up and embraced him, holding him close._

_“Is your father alright? I heard shots.” She asked, worry etched on her face._

_Jason nodded. “He’s fine. He’s taking watch downstairs.”_

_“Oh thank God.” She let out a breath of relief and released her son._

_Jason held his boyfriend close. They had been together for two years and now it seemed like their perfect little world was coming apart around them. The dead were attacking the living and law and order had all but disappeared. He tightened the embrace. The world was falling apart but they weren’t. They were together. They always would be. Their feelings hadn’t changed and never would._

A cold shiver of cool air roused Jason from his slumber. His hands searched for his jacket but then he remembered he had given it to Carl the night before. His neck ached from the position he had slept in but apart from the ache and the cold he was fine. He was alive. Jason sat up and took his notebook out of his bag to mark a new tally according to his morning ritual.

That’s when he heard it. Hushed talking and the sounds of leaves crackling under foot. Jason turned to find Rick still asleep but there was no sign of Carl or Michonne. He continued to look around his surroundings until his eyes settled on the two of them. They stood in a small clearing with Michonne standing behind Carl. Carl had her sword in his hands and Michonne had his forearms in her hands. Jason smiled as he watched them. Michonne was teaching Carl how to use the sword. Jason made no noise and chose just to sit and watch. It was a peaceful morning and Rick deserved to sleep a little longer.

Michonne guided Carl’s hands and taught him how to move his arms so he could cut through things with the sword. What Carl hadn’t realised at first was how much skill, strength and stamina it took to use the sword effectively. You had to be in very good physical condition to keep it up for long. Michonne was noting, just as Jason had the day before, that Carl was a fast learner. He was getting the hang of the movements even if they did make his arms burn after a while. One thing that was obvious, even from where Jason sat in relation to where Carl and Michonne stood, was how much Carl enjoyed the opportunity to learn this skill. Jason made a vow to himself. He would find a sword for Carl.

The groan of a walker signalled its approach towards their camp. It was enough to wake Rick who jumped up and grabbed a knife and his revolver. The walker appeared to be one of the older members of the undead army as its nose had fallen away along with its ears. It stumbled slowly towards Carl and Michonne. Michonne took her sword from Carl and prepared to take it out but was stopped by a call from Jason.

“Wait!” Jason called. “Let Carl use it for practice.”

Michonne eyed the young man for a moment. It was a dangerous thing to try, especially with a katana but she quickly made up her mind and handed the sword to Carl. Carl clutched the handle and held the sword above his head, bending his arms as Michonne had taught him. When the walker closed the gap between them, he swung at its head, straightening his arms with one swift movement and brought the sword to the walker’s neck. The blade cut straight through and decapitated the walker, causing the body to collapse to the ground and the head to fall beside it and roll on the ground. The walker’s head continued to bite at Carl even though it could no longer move. Still clutching the sword with two hands, he inverted the sword and brought the blade down into the walker’s skull, stabbing its brain and killing it. Carl placed his boot on the walker’s face for purchase so he could successfully remove the sword.

Clapping sounded from behind him. He turned round to see not only Jason clapping but also Rick. Michonne was also smiling with pride. In just under two hours she had taught the teen how to cut up a zombie with her sword. It was a useful skill for him to have and all he needed was more practice and a sword of his own.

“You’ve got a great teacher.” Jason told Carl with a smile.

Carl grinned and looked at Michonne before turning back to Jason.

“Yeah. The best!” He agreed.

Michonne took her sword back, cleaning the blade of walker blood before sheathing it on her back again.

“He’s a good student.” She commented with a smile, patting Carl on the back.

“We’ll try to find him a sword.” Jason commented. “Perhaps look in a museum or something.”

“Swords aren’t easy to come by.” Rick mentioned, looking over at Jason. “It’s best if he sticks to his gun and knives.”

Jason smiled as did Carl. “We’ve got that covered already.”

Carl walked over to Jason and Rick, unzipping the leather jacket before handing it back to Jason. Jason accepted it and put it back on.

“So, find Carl something warmer to wear and then onward to Terminus, right?” Jason asked just so the plan for the day was confirmed.

“That’s right.” Rick answered. “Don’t want to be out here exposed any longer than we need to be.”

“Then we might as well pack up and go now.” Jason suggested, grabbing his bag and beginning to undo the string that had served as their alarm.

They still had a long road ahead of them.

 

As they continued along the tracks they found another housing estate. They reached the front porch of the first house they had chosen to search. Rick was prepared to go in but Jason offered for him and Carl to go in instead. It wouldn’t take long and it meant Michonne and Rick could keep watch. Rick had declined the suggestion but had accepted the idea that he and Michonne would search the kitchen for food while Jason and Carl searched upstairs for something for Carl to wear.

Jason and Carl ascended the stairs with their guns raised in case any walkers burst out of an open door or were lurking in the hallway. As this wasn’t the case they holstered their guns for the time being and kept their knives at the ready. Jason led Carl past some closed doors towards what looked like the door to a teenager’s bedroom. A bullet hole was framed in the middle of the door. Jason peered through the hole to see two walkers. One was about Carl’s height and the other about Rick’s height. An older and younger brother, he assumed.

“We take them out together?” Carl whispered.

Jason shook his head. “I’m not going to do anything. You kill them.”

Carl gave him an incredulous look. “Are you serious?”

“You need the practice, right?” Jason justified his stance. “I’ll make sure nothing goes wrong, I promise.”

Carl thought for a moment, swallowing nervously before nodding. Jason opened the door as the smaller walker came stumbling out towards Carl. Once it had walked out onto the hallway he slammed the door behind it to block the larger one which had started banging on the door, groaning with hunger.

The smaller walker snarled as it approached Carl. Using what Jason had taught him, he kicked the walker’s knee forcing it to collapse onto its front. Just like before, Carl stabbed it in the head. He looked up at Jason and nodded. Jason opened the door again.

The larger walker charged out hungrily towards the teen. Jason stood behind it with his knife at the ready. Carl kicked the walker’s kneecap but it only dropped onto that knee and didn’t collapse like Carl had expected.

Jason realising the situation barked out advice. “Kick its chest!”

Carl did as he was told, the walker trying to grab and bite his leg but was too slow to even get close. The force of the kick knocked the walker onto its back allowing Carl to jump forward and stab it in the head. Carl removed the knife from the head and sheathed it like before. His hands were shaking.

“You okay?” Jason asked him, sheathing his own knife.

“Yeah, it’s just adrenaline.” Carl answered with a smile.

Jason smiled and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Let’s see if they have anything your size.”

After searching the wardrobe Carl managed to find a dark blue jumper that also had a small hood on it. Jason held Carl’s hat as he put the jumper on and smiled when it fit snugly on him. Jason handed back his hat with a smile.

“That should keep you a fair bit warmer.” He commented.

Carl nodded with a smile before following Jason down the stairs to meet up with Rick and Michonne. They had dispatched a couple walkers of their own and had gathered a couple cans of food but nothing much else. It was better than nothing as they were still a couple days walk away from Terminus.

They headed back out onto the street and froze as soon as they did so. Coming down the street towards them, well aware of their presence, was a herd of walkers. It was hard to count but there had to be about three hundred walkers marching towards them. The stench was eye wateringly awful. Rick quickly ordered them all back inside and instantly started barricading the doors and windows of the ground floor. They all quickly worked to block up any potential entrances into the house.

Within a couple minutes the herd was upon them and were banging on the doors, walls and windows. It didn’t take long until the army of corpses had smashed the windows and were pushing at the barricades behind them. Rick continued to look for an opening in the herd but the house was surrounded. The stench was overpowering as was the never ending chorus of hungry groans and snarls. Some of the walkers were starting to crawl through the windows but were met with the sharp end of Michonne’s sword. The sound of glass smashing and wood creaking and groaning accompanied the chorus of groans and snarls. The house was not going to withstand much more of the walkers’ assault.

The front door of the house began to splinter apart as the wood gave way and the hinges came loose. Rick rushed up to the shelf he had placed in front of it to act as a barricade and pushed with all his weight to prevent it from collapsing. He shouted in effort and pain, his side and leg burned from the strain of the activity. Jason felt a horrendous feeling of claustrophobia set in. It was just like back at the hospital but this time there was no escape and he wasn’t going to abandon anyone this time.

“Rick!” He shouted, suddenly deciding to take charge. “We need to get on the roof!”

“We’ll be trapped up there!” Rick retorted, still pushing against the shelf as it leaned further into the house under the weight of the walkers behind it.

“We’re trapped in here as it is!” Jason shouted. “They won’t make it onto the roof so come on!”

Jason pushed Carl up the stairs, beckoning Michonne to follow which she did and they were all quickly followed by Rick. As soon as Rick moved the shelf collapsed and the walkers started pouring into the house. They all ran through the house as fast as their legs could carry them. Jason opened one of the bedroom windows and quickly forced Carl through it, telling him to wait on the other side. He let Michonne climb through next and then Rick. The door of the bedroom creaked and splintered as the walkers slammed themselves against it. Just as it broke down and the walkers came charging through into the bedroom Jason climbed through the window.

Jason pointed to the higher part of the roof and showed them all how to climb up onto it. Michonne and Rick managed it with ease but Carl struggled. Jason grabbed Carl’s hand and helped to pull him up onto the roof. They all sat on the roof and took a moment to get their breath back. Below them the house was completely surrounded by a repugnant sea of hungry corpses. They were safe from the immediate threat but unless the herd was stimulated by something else they would be trapped up here forever. The other houses were too far away for them to even attempt jumping from one roof to the other.

They were in luck as just half an hour later gunshots sounded a couple blocks away. The herd was stimulated by the shots, assisted by the fact that Rick and the others had stayed quiet on the roof to avoid attracting attention. Slowly but surely a few walkers began stumbling towards the source of the gunshots which in turn encouraged other walkers to follow. Slowly but surely the whole herd was on the move. Unfortunately they shuffled along so slowly that the group would need to wait an hour or two before they herd was at a safe distance.

 

An hour had passed and the majority of the walkers had moved away from the house. The herd was still too close for them to make much noise but they appeared to be out of harm’s way for the time being. Jason looked around them for a clear route to Terminus that didn’t cross paths with the herd again. The railway line appeared to veer in a different direction from the walker herd so there was hope that they wouldn’t encounter the herd again.

A drop of moisture interrupted his thoughts. He raised his hand to his nose and rubbed it off with a finger. Wet. He looked up at the clouded sky and felt more and more droplets of water. It had started raining.

“Great. Now things really couldn’t get any worse.” He commented with a sarcastic tone.

He dropped down off the top of the roof onto one of the lower sections. As parts of the building overhung it meant there was some shelter from the rain even on the roof of the house. They all made their way down to the sheltered part of the roof, all of them absorbed in their own thoughts.

Carl studied Jason as the young man continued to look out at the herd as it stumbled away from them. He couldn’t imagine being out in this world all alone for months like Jason had. Carl doubted if he would have had it in himself to continue on alone for that long.

“Jason?” Carl asked, getting the young man’s attention.

“Yeah?” Jason responded, turning to the boy.

“I’ve been meaning to ask.” Carl started. “What did you do all this time? Before you met us?”

“Searching.” Jason answered, looking down at his holstered gun. “I spent every single day looking.”

“Looking for what?” Carl asked, confused and curious.

“A good death.” Jason answered with a weak smile. “I wanted to be with him again. But he made me promise not to take my own life.”

Carl listened. He knew Jason meant his dead boyfriend. Jason’s eyes and the look on his face showed so much emotional agony. This was a death he was never going to move on from.

“I also wasn’t allowed to let myself die by being stupid.” Jason continued. “I had to find a death that had meaning, so I wouldn’t feel ashamed when I saw him again.”

“Are you still looking for a meaningful death?” Carl asked. He was hurt at the thought of losing their latest addition to the group and it pained him to believe Jason actually looked forward to it.

Jason stared at Carl for a few moments without speaking. He hadn’t given it much thought but now that Carl had put him on the spot he wasn’t sure. He had spent all this time earning Rick’s trust and looking out for Carl that he had stopped his search in some way. Jason questioned himself. Was this just part of the search? Die for Carl, Rick or Michonne so that his death would have meaning? He couldn’t stand to live without the love of his life by his side nor was he prepared to abandon this group.

Jason shrugged. “I…I don’t actually know anymore.”

Carl’s eyes stayed locked with his own. They both had blue eyes. Both pairs of eyes held pain inside them.

Jason smiled softly and placed a hand on Carl’s back. “But I don’t plan on leaving this group. I promise.”

 

**So that’s chapter 6 finally complete. Sorry for the delay but I was ill and my brain wasn’t working. So if there’s more mistakes than usual in the chapter then that will be why. I feel this was a weak chapter but I could just be harsh on myself. In any case, the next few chapters will be much better.**

**Chapter 7 will be up much quicker because I can’t wait to write Chapters 8 and 9.**

**Thank you for all the kudos/bookmarks/favourites/follows.**

**Also special thanks to the reviewers of chapter 5: rk0192, Madison188, Kokiriss, RainbowO, kingcarlgrimes, SaraP, RehCluf & Erebus_And_Nyx. **

**As usual, leave a review to let me know your thoughts, regardless of whether they are good or bad. Everything helps. Flames will be used to burn Terminus to the ground though, just saying. :P**

 


	7. Kellin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carl finally manages to coax the story of Jason's pain out of him.

 

The air was cool but fortunately there was no breeze or wind of any kind, this helped to keep the temperature from falling too low. The train tracks just seemed to stretch out for miles and miles without any stops. The group was now several hours away from the herd that had trapped them in the house and with any luck were also several miles away from it too. Rick and Jason walked side by side in the centre of the tracks, the leaves and gravel crackling under their feet with each step.

“Do you think this Terminus place is even still there?” Jason asked him as they walked. “Those signs didn’t look recent.”

Rick shrugged slightly as they walked. “Probably is. They would need to have fences, walls, weapons and people.”

Jason nodded to this but thought for a moment. “So did you. At the prison.”

Rick narrowed his eyes and threw Jason a glare but kept walking.

“Yes we did and it worked until someone drove through in a tank.” Rick answered, his tone of voice told Jason to watch his wording of things. These were still fresh wounds.

“Hopefully it’s still there.” Jason commented. “We need a break.”

Rick nodded, staring ahead. “We’ll get one.”

Rick checked his bag and looked at the various supplies contained inside it. Their water was running low meaning they would need to find a river or lake or ration the water until they reached Terminus. It was a tough call with the river being the better idea. Carl and Michonne hadn’t been heard speaking for a while so he decided to strike up conversation with them as well.

“I think we’ve got about a day’s worth of water left.” Rick told them as he walked. “We’re lucky that it’s cooled off a little bit but…”

Rick turned to look at them and was confused at the sight he was greeted with. Several feet away Carl and Michonne were carefully balancing on the rails of the track with their arms out and having to place one foot in front of the other. This was taking up all their concentration as they were struggling to keep their balance. No wonder they weren’t talking or answering.

“What are you doing?” He asked, confused.

“Winning a bet.” Carl answered with a smile.

“In your dreams!” Michonne challenged the teen.

Rick stood where he was and couldn’t help but smile. Jason had his arms folded and was also smiling with amusement.

“I’m still on!” Carl declared, trying to reach out and knock Michonne off but only succeeding in destabilising his own balance for a moment.

Michonne laughed. “Spoke too soon, wise guy!”

Rick walked up to them as Carl regained his footing and balance.

“This might go on a while.” He told them and then asked. “Think we can speed this up?”

“Yeah you’re right. We shouldn’t be fooling around.” Michonne answered, breathing heavily from concentration. “We should probably _go_!”

She yelled out the last word and threw her arm out to startle Carl but ended up losing her balance completely and fell off the rail. She side stepped to keep from falling over and glared at Carl who was grinning with the pride of victory.

Carl stepped off the rail. “I win.” He declared. “Pay up.”

He outstretched his right hand as Michonne went into her bag and pulled out two chocolate bars. A Cruncho which she held out in her fingers and a Big Cat which she kept in her hand. It was easy to tell which one was her favourite out of the two.

“Is that really the last Big Cat?” Carl questioned.

He looked down at the two chocolate bars and thought for a moment. His favourite was also the Big Cat and Michonne had set out that the winner would get to choose before they started their competition. Carl took the Big Cat.

“Oh come on!” Michonne pleaded in disappointment.

“Hey but you said winner’s choice.” Carl countered with a cheeky grin.

Michonne narrowed her eyes as she placed the Cruncho back into the bag. “Fine, take it. It’s yours. You won it. Fair and square.” Her tone was laced with disappointment.

Carl opened the wrapper and broke the bar in half, offering one half to Michonne who narrowed her eyes at him, expecting him to tease her over it as he had done in the past.

“Come on, we always share.” Carl told her, prompting her to take the half with a smile.

Rick and Jason were still smiling and laughing lightly from the entire display. To see a close friendship between two broken people was such a treat to see. This was especially important to Rick for Carl’s sake as they didn’t often get opportunities to smile and to laugh.

 

It had been several hours of tiring and almost painful walking since the bet Carl and Michonne had came to a conclusion. The sun had just about set behind the horizon and the group had yet again set up a box of string around them with empty cans tied to it. In the centre of their makeshift camp they had another fire which had been placed in a hole. All four of them sat around it, trying to stay warm in the cold night air.

Jason studied Rick for a moment. Something was bugging him about his name. Rick Grimes. He had heard the name before but he couldn’t remember where. Jason furrowed his brow in thought. He had to remember why the name was significant. He cast his mind back a few nights before.

_“You’re a good shot, Carl.” Jason asked suddenly, remembering the boy’s aim when shooting walkers. “Who taught you?”_

_“My dad’s best friend, Shane.” Carl answered._

_Jason didn’t push for more information. He already could tell the man was dead and something must have happened as he had never been mentioned up until now._

Then another memory flashed through him. A conversation with his father when the walkers had just started to appear.

_“This news says we should go to Atlanta.” Jason told his father, his hand gesturing at the television._

_“Thousands of people going there will just be chaos.” His father told him. “We’re safer at home and away from people.”_

_“What if you’re wrong?” Jason questioned his father’s judgement._

_“Then one of my friends over in King County will let me know.” His father answered._

_“A friend?” Jason questioned, unsure of who is father was talking about._

_“Deputy Shane Walsh is heading to Atlanta.” His father told him. “You remember him, don’t you? Your old gun instructor.”_

_Jason did indeed remember Shane. Despite not being a member of the force, Shane had taught Jason how to use a gun because his father was a fellow officer. Whenever criminals passed between their counties they would often work together and had a good relationship as a result._

_“At least it’s someone we can trust.” Jason answered, nodding._

_Were they the same person? It was indeed possible and Jason could swear the name “Officer Grimes” rang a bell in his memory banks. He wasn’t sure if it was wise to ask but for his father’s sake he felt he had to know the truth one way or another._

“Rick, I have a question.” Jason announced, slightly hesitant.

“What’s on your mind?” Rick asked him, staring at him from across the camp fire.

“Carl told me that your best friend taught him how to use a gun.” Jason explained carefully. “Was that Officer Shane Walsh?”

Rick glared from across the fire. Shane. The man who had protected his family, had been obsessed with his wife, the man who had been Judith’s father before she died, and the very same man who tried to kill Rick back at Hershel’s farm. How Jason knew who him was a mystery.

“Yes it was.” Rick answered. “You say that as if you knew him.”

“I did.” Jason answered. “He taught me how to shoot. My father was a cop.”

Rick narrowed his eyes and nodded. It made sense as Shane had been a gun instructor and Rick could vaguely remember the mentioning of teaching a friend’s son as a favour. Jason interrupted Rick from his thoughts.

“What happened to him?” Jason asked out of curiosity. He had no idea.

Rick struggled to answer. He wasn’t sure how to explain Shane’s death without shredding the respect and good memories Jason probably had of the man. It was Carl who spoke next.

“He lost it.” Carl answered. “Tried to kill my dad.”

Rick stared over at Carl who briefly stared back before turning his attention back to Jason.

“My dad did what he had to.” Carl finished.

Rick accepted the explanation. No personal details were shared and it didn’t destroy the memory of the good man Shane used to be before everything changed. Jason nodded and accepted the answer in silence.

“Jason?” Carl asked out of the blue. “What was his name?”

Jason was confused by the sudden question. What was whose name?

“Who?” He asked, shaking his head in confusion.

“Your boyfriend.” Carl continued. “What was his name? You never told me.”

“Does it matter?” Jason asked, feeling defensive. He didn’t want to go through the pain again.

“Talking helps.” Michonne interjected. “And we all know you miss him. We all miss people.”

Jason wasn’t sure how to answer. Was it really necessary to go into great detail over those they had lost?

“You know, I still wake up some mornings and expect to find Lori beside me.” Rick told them. He could relate to the painful separation that Jason felt every day.

“Talking about it just makes it hurt even more than it already does.” Jason answered, staring at the flames.

“Well can’t we share your pain?” Carl offered, staring right into Jason’s eyes when the young man looked up from the fire.

“You don’t have to.” Jason told the teen, not wanting to add to the pain they all carried already.

“But I choose to.” Carl retorted, echoing what Jason had said to him before.

Jason sighed and sat back, leaning against a tree trunk. He closed his eyes for a moment and finally decided to lower his defences. He told himself it was to better integrate into the group but he knew the truth. It was because _Carl_ asked.

“Kellin.” Jason finally told them. “His name was Kellin.”

“How did you meet him?” Carl asked, having gone into his interrogation mode, so to speak. Jason and Michonne knew the questions would keep coming.

Jason sighed and decided to go into detail.

“I had just turned sixteen and was out clubbing with a friend.” Jason explained before he started his story. “Kellin was just about to turn fifteen.”

_The music was loud, echoing all around the dark room. Strobe lights of multiple colours illuminated the room as people danced in the centre of the room, some alone others together and others in groups. Off to the sides of the dance floor, people sat at tables enjoying drinks. Some were couples, others friends and a rare few were alone. The darkness of the club made it impossible to tell the time of day outside as it had no windows._

_Jason was sitting round the side from the bar. Behind the bar and the DJ’s box was a quieter sitting area that was illuminated by UV lights that in turn illuminated parts of clothing, jewellery and teeth. He sat alone with a drink of water. Despite the great variety of alcoholic drinks and soft drinks he refused to have any of them._

_He glanced over towards the dance hall to watch a couple dancing. He had come to the club with a friend as part of a night out in the town for some fun. However, his friend had caught sight of an attractive young woman and appeared to have forgotten about Jason’s existence as a consequence. He sighed in frustration, his shoulders falling with the release of air as he pushed one of his hair bangs out of his eye._

_“Why not go up and dance instead of sitting here sulking?” A voice asked him from behind._

_He whipped around to look at the owner. The teenage boy looked a little younger than he was with stylish blonde hair that made him stand out in a crowd. Brown eyes gazing into Jason’s blue ones._

_“I’m not much of a dancer.” Jason replied with a smile. “Just been abandoned by a friend, that’s all.”_

_“Oh so you’re alone.” The blonde replied. “Perfect.”_

_“And why is that perfect?” Jason asked, confused. “Loneliness is never good.”_

_“Means I can sit here and no one will complain.” The blonde boy answered, sitting next to him. “And now you’re no longer alone.”_

_The blonde giggled at their own declaration, though there was also a nervousness in the giggle that Jason picked up on. To ease the tension and to allow himself the opportunity to forget about his treacherous friend, he laughed along with the blonde._

_“So don’t you have a girlfriend you could be with?” The blonde asked out of curiosity._

_Jason shook his head and chuckled. “Nope, I’m a single pringle.”_

_“A solo rolo.” The blonde interjected with a laugh of their own._

_Both individuals laughed at the silly nature of their statements. Jason had successfully forgotten about his friend and found his attention being fixated on the blonde beauty beside him._

_“So what’s your name?” The blonde asked him with a sweet smile._

_“Jason.” He answered with a matching smile. “What’s yours?”_

_“Kellin.” The blonde answered, still smiling._

_“I’ve never seen you here before.” Jason commented. “I’m pretty sure I’d remember you.”_

_“Tonight’s my first time.” Kellin answered with a shrug._

_“Enjoying it so far?” Jason asked. “More than me anyway?”_

_Kellin shook his head and giggled. “Nah, it’s shit.”_

_Jason furrowed his brow in thought. This couldn’t be tolerated. Here he had met a fun new person, someone who noticed him and had just about saved him from the loneliness caused by his friend who could only think with one head at a time. Yet this fun new blonde haired boy was not having fun in their current location._

_“The arcade is open still.” Jason told him. “Why don’t we go there and have a laugh?”_

_Kellin stood up before looking out at the dance floor. “What about your friend?”_

_“Who?” Jason asked with a cheeky smile and led them towards the exit._

Jason noticed just how much interest Rick, Michonne and especially Carl were taking in his story. He hadn’t expected them to be genuine in their requests to know more about him and he had to admit it did feel better getting to share these memories. Jason decided to continue his story for them.

“So that’s how it started. We were just friends at first.” He explained. “Nothing serious really happened until we were at a lake I knew of.”

He thought back to that day. The lake was secluded and few people really knew about it and even fewer ever went to it. It was the perfect place to escape to in the summer.

_Jason stared out at the water of the lake. The sun was bright in the sky and caused the surface of the water to sparkle. The ducks quacked to each other as they swam about without a care in the world. They didn’t care that he was close by, they were used to people by now. Jason turned to the blonde beauty beside him, the individual who had saved him from a boring evening at the club after his friend had abandoned him._

_“I come here whenever I want to think about things.” Jason told him._

_“What do you usually think about?” Kellin asked him, curious._

_“Life mainly. Whether I’ll ever be truly happy.” Jason said, feeling guilty at being negative. “That’s the biggest one. Happiness.”_

_Jason turned back to look at the water. He felt warmth on his hand, the feeling of another hand. He couldn’t remember when the blonde had moved but they were now sitting a lot closer to him on the grass than they had been before._

_“Aren’t you happy right now?” Kellin asked him, slightly nervous. “Spending time with a new friend?”_

_Jason sighed, he hadn’t meant for it to sound like that. “Yeah, but there’s still that slight feeling of loneliness. I can’t explain it.”_

_He felt the hand move off his own and end up caressing the back of his neck. He turned to the blonde and found himself staring into their deep brown eyes, their face inches from his. They were close enough that they could feel the heat of their breath on their faces. Jason’s heart started pounding. He had suspected that they might have shared some kind of attraction. They did flirt on occasion. He had chosen not to say anything as he didn’t want to be rejected like so many times before._

_His train of thought was quickly derailed as he felt warm lips capture his own. His eyes were closed though he couldn’t remember when he had closed them. He leaned into the kiss as Kellin rubbed his back before lifting a leg over him and gently pushing him onto his back so that he were on top of him. The surprise of the movement had caused Jason to let out a small gasp which the blonde took advantage of, gently sliding his tongue between his lips to tease his own._

_They lay there on the grass like that for most of the afternoon. Kissing and holding each other close under the afternoon sun. Nothing else mattered in the world. They had each other. Jason felt his heart swell in these moments. This was the start of something new and exciting and beautiful in his life. He knew people would disagree with it. People would hate them. Family might disapprove. Jason didn’t care about any of that. The empty feeling inside of him was gone. He wasn’t lonely anymore._

“I had been mostly wrong.” Jason told them, taking a break from the details of his story. “My parents were just happy that I had found someone who made me feel complete.”

Rick and Michonne knew how terrifying it was for teenagers to come out as being gay or bisexual in the world before. Carl fortunately had no knowledge of that and from what Jason could deduce, Rick wasn’t homophobic either. If he had been, he wasn’t anymore as the apocalypse changed a lot of those things and made them insignificant. It was about the living and the dead.

“When I was seventeen, I decided to do something special for Kellin’s sixteenth birthday.” Jason explained. “I took him out for the whole day, movies, arcade, and the lake, anywhere he wanted to go.”

Jason smiled warmly at the memory of that day. He had expected to be embarrassed about mentioning what happened next, especially with Carl and Carl’s father in front of him but it felt natural and acceptable to continue the explanation.

“My parents were out on a trip to see family, so we had the house to ourselves.” Jason explained. “So that night we made love for the first time.

Jason did feel heat spread to his cheeks a little but his pride and the warmth of the memory overpowered it. He could tell Carl was quite confused as he probably didn’t know how two males could do anything together. He figured he’d save the details for the day Carl had the courage to ask for them and preferably when Rick wasn’t staring at him.

_The kettle let out a loud click to signal that it had finished boiling the water inside it. Steam rose out of the top slowly. Jason lifted it off the base and poured the boiling water into two separate black mugs before placing it back where it was. Retrieving the milk from the fridge, he also added a portion of that to each cup before returning the milk to its place on the shelf on the fridge door. He stirred both mugs of coffee thoroughly before rinsing the teaspoon and taking the mugs through to the bedroom._

_Lying in the bed half asleep with the covers still over them was the same blonde beauty that had come into his life a couple months before. Jason smiled as he observed his sleeping form and remembered the night before fondly. It had been one of the best nights of his life and was hopefully one of many to come. He didn’t want to disturb him but he figured they had both slept in long enough._

_“Wakey, wakey, poppet.” He called, rousing him from the addictive clutches of sleep. “Coffee’s ready.”_

_“5 more minutes!” Kellin grumbled from under the covers._

_“Don’t make me tickle you!” Jason warned the blonde, which made him sit up quickly._

_“If you do that again I’m not responsible for your injuries.” Kellin threatened with a giggle._

_Jason laughed with him and handed him the mug of coffee._

_The blonde’s collarbones were exposed as the covers retreated as he reached for his mug. Jason sat on his side of the bed with his own mug and waited for his coffee to cool down enough to it wouldn’t burn his tongue or mouth._

_“Sleep well?” He asked Kellin, placing a kiss on their cheek._

_The action earned him a smile from Kellin who nodded. “Best I’ve slept in a long time.”_

_Jason smiled back. “Same here.”_

_Kellin took a sip of his coffee, taking care not to burn himself before looking out the window. Outside the birds were singing, the sun was shining and people were starting their day. The noise of car engines was a constant dull hum in the background of whatever they did._

_Jason checked his mobile phone that had sat by his bedside all night. It was ten in the morning. He had a missed call from the night before which he remembered as being a call he chose to ignore as he and his bedfellow were otherwise occupied. He put the phone back down. He would call them back when he was free._

_Jason drank some of his coffee, closing his eyes as the warm liquid made its way through him and the caffeine awakened his senses. He was still a little tired but it was a Sunday. It was a lazy day. He yawned at the thought of doing next to nothing all day and reflected on the last couple months. The kiss by the lake had been the start of a relationship and he hoped it was one that would last. It felt right. He felt like they were two halves that had come together, never to be separate ever again. The day before had been Kellin’s birthday and had been filled with so much fun and lots of affection. That night he had taken Kellin’s virginity as a final birthday gift which had turned out to be a night that would never be forgotten._

_He finished his coffee shortly after his boyfriend finished his and took Kellin’s hand in his own. They stared at each other for a few beats. Jason was just admiring him. He did this often and Kellin was used to it._

_“You’re so gorgeous, even first thing in the morning.” He told him, earning him a kiss._

_“No, you are.” Kellin countered with a smile._

_Jason smiled at the compliment and laughed at their silly little argument. They did this all the time and there never was a clear victor._

_“There’s a reason I can’t take my eyes off you, baby.” Jason told him, rubbing his cheek with his hand. “You’re going to have to accept that one day.”_

_“Maybe.” Kellin countered, kissing Jason and wrapping his arms around him. “But not today.”_

_Jason giggled as the blonde pulled him closer and lay back, pulling him on top of them without breaking the kiss._

_“If only life could be like this all the time.” Kellin lamented in thought._

_Jason left a small kiss on the end of his nose. “It can be. If we choose to make it that way.”_

_“Do you think we can?” He asked him with uncertainty._

_“I can’t think of anything that could ruin this for us.” Jason answered, kissing them again and initiating morning love._

Rick and Michonne stared at him with understanding smiles. They knew what it was like to share moments like that. Carl however could only look at him with fascination as he had never experienced anything close to that before. It was something he hoped he could experience one day.

Jason’s tone changed and became darker and more serious. He explained to them that he and Kellin had managed to survive with a group of other survivors from the area for the best part of a year. It had been difficult but they had worked through it. Kellin truly struggled with the changed world. It wasn’t where he belonged.

“His heart was too big for this world.” Jason told them, his lip shaking with emotion. “He was a big kid, a big cute, sweet kid.”

Jason closed his eyes and held his breath for a moment to regain his composure so he could continue his story. It was getting harder and harder to talk about it without breaking down but the three people in front of him were intensely focused on what he was telling them. Michonne placed a hand on his shoulder to give him reassurance.

“One day, we had all fought through a large crowd of walkers that had found the camp.” Jason explained. “We were all tired and I was told to go on watch duty.”

Jason’s eyes turned red and they stung with the threat of tears. He scrunched them closed and held the tears back.

“I was so tired. I fell asleep.” Jason confessed. “The walkers from the day had been part of a herd.”

_Jason awoke to an awful stench filling the air. Looking down the hill from where they camped a sea of undead corpses stumbled towards them. They were close. Too close to evacuate the camp and not draw attention. He was about to call out but a gunshot suddenly sounded. Someone in the camp had found a walker and shot it without realising the danger. What Jason only realised when he looked round was that the herd was already upon them with walkers wandering through the camp. Fear shot through him, firing up his adrenaline. Only one thing mattered to him. Kellin._

_He hopped down from the mobile home he had been perched on and grabbed a hatchet. The camp was infested with walkers. Members of the group were firing guns into the darkness at approaching walkers and even one of the tents had caught on fire, smoke filling the air. It was chaos. A walker came out of the smoke towards Jason and snarled as it reached out. Jason swung the hatchet and brought it down onto the monster’s forehead, ending its life with a swift blow._

_Jason pulled the hatchet out of the skull and moved quickly through the chaos. He walked quickly but didn’t run because of the density of the smoke and of walkers and armed people. The walkers just seemed to be everywhere. Two more walkers came close to him, forcing him to quickly swing the hatchet and decapitate both of them, letting the heads fly off onto the ground where they became lost in the desperate scramble. Jason marched on but found the path blocked by another small cluster of walkers. He growled in frustration and in desperation and pulled out his father’s Beretta. Holding the gun in one hand, Jason shot most of the walkers in the cluster in front of him before executing the last two with powerful strikes from the hatchet. Blood was splattered over his jacket and face but he didn’t care. He needed to find Kellin._

_Out of the chaos one of the group members rushed towards him, they were shaking with fear and rage and pointed their gun at Jason._

_“This was your fault!” They roared. “You were supposed to keep watch!”_

_“I have to find Kellin!” Jason bellowed back. “Move out my way!”_

_Before the man could retort a walker came up from behind and bit into his neck. Jason knew that the humane thing to do would be to shoot the man but he didn’t have time. He rushed past the man as his agonising shrieks joined the chorus of sounds. Screaming. Shouting. Snarling. Gunshots. Burning. It was chaos. Pure chaos._

_Another walked snarled at Jason before receiving the hatchet to its forehead like several before it. The hatchet became stuck in the walker’s skull and two more were stumbling towards Jason as he tried to pull the blade out. He grabbed a screwdriver that lay on the ground, dropped in the panic, and stabbed it straight through the eye of one of the walkers. The other one was almost on top of him so he kicked its kneecap which brought the creature crashing to the ground. Jason pulled his hatchet out of the dead walker’s skull and immediately brought it down into the back of the skull of the walker he had just tripped._

_Jason pulled the hatchet out of the skull and rushed towards the tent he and Kellin shared. It wasn’t far and he was glad. More and more walkers were pouring into the camp and he was getting tired. The only thing that was keeping him going was raw adrenaline and even that wouldn’t last forever. He ran towards the tent. Kellin wasn’t in it. He wasn’t there._

_“Kellin!” Jason shouted desperately. He had to find him. He had to. “Kellin!!”_

_The sound of objects from a table falling to the ground behind him caught his attention. Jason spun round and came face to face with a walker. Panic shot through him. He couldn’t react in time. A gunshot sounded and the walker’s temple exploded as it fell to the floor in front of him. Jason turned to his left and saw a disgruntled Kellin walk out of the smoke. His face was filled with pure terror._

_Behind Kellin two more walkers appeared but Jason was quick to use his father’s Beretta to gun them down. He had no ammo left. He rushed over to Jason and embraced him briefly._

_“We have to go!” Jason barked._

_“Go where?” Kellin asked him, confused and afraid._

_“Anywhere but here!” Jason answered and grabbed his hand._

_A walker was getting close to Kellin so Jason pulled him out of the way and spun them around. He aimed at the walker’s head but realised he was out of ammo. The walker tried to grab him but Jason side stepped. The walker’s cold hand slammed against his wrist and made him drop the gun. It didn’t matter. Jason pushed Kellin and got them running out of the camp as fast as their legs could carry them. Behind them only the sounds of screaming, gunshots and the undead filled the air. The mixed smell of fire and death assaulted the senses. They had known the people who were fighting for their lives behind them for a year. Jason didn’t care. His only priority was Kellin. He squeezed Kellin’s hand as they ran away from the terror unfolding behind them._

_What seemed like hours that had passed had probably only been minutes but it didn’t matter to him. All Jason knew was that he couldn’t hear the screams or the groans or the gunshots anymore. He saw a building in his peripheral vision and guided Kellin towards it. Pulling out his hatchet he ran up to the front door of what was previously a family’s home and kicked the door open. The inside of the house was dark. The moonlight couldn’t penetrate through the double layer of slate and tree branches above. He grabbed the dust-covered answering machine and tossed it into the room ahead of him, the noise of its landing deafening in the silence of the night. A single deathly moan came from the same room as one of the reanimated corpses revealed itself by stumbling towards the source of the noise. Jason moved forward swiftly and buried his hatchet in the back of the creature’s skull. The monster dropped to the floor with a thud and silence returned. Jason guided Kellin into the front room where it was safer. There didn’t seem to be any other walkers in the house._

_Jason kept the hatchet tucked in his belt as he grabbed the feet of the walker and dragged it towards the door. He didn’t want to sleep next to a rotting corpse. Not after the loss of the camp. The body was heavier than he expected it to be, causing him to groan in effort as he dragged it out of the house through the front door. He left it on the front porch, deciding it was better to move it in the morning light than in complete darkness. Jason walked back into the house and closed the door behind him. He wrapped his arms around a book case and groaned in effort as he moved it in front of the door as a makeshift barricade. He turned around and took in the sight before him. Kellin was sitting in the middle of the room, cradling his knees in his arms as tears streamed from his eyes and rolled down his cheeks._

_Jason knelt down in front of his boyfriend._

_“It’s okay, we’re safe for now.” He told him in an effort to calm him down._

_Kellin continued to cry however._

_“I’m sorry about the others but maybe some of them survived.” He suggested._

_“It’s not that.” Came the choked reply. “I was bit.”_

_There was an intense flash of lightning that illuminated the room before darkness reclaimed it. Moments later a loud crash of thunder sounded in the sky before the heavens opened and a torrent of rain came crashing down outside. The rain drops pelted the windows of the house and drummed against the rooftop loudly. The constant, rapid pounding of the rain was only interrupted by more loud echoes of thunder accompanied by the blinding flashes of lightning._

_Jason stared into Kellin’s eyes, the blood draining from his face as his head began to feel light and his legs weak. The words that had just been said to him repeated themselves inside his head, echoing in his mind as if it was a large empty cave._

_“I was bit.”_

_The statement repeated itself, leaving Jason frozen with shock and confusion. He hadn’t seen it happen. It all happened so fast. He had got to them as fast as he could. It wasn’t fast enough. They were supposed to survive together. Kellin was going to die. He promised to keep him safe. He had broken his promise._

_Jason felt his body shake and had to grab the coffee table for support, fearing he would lose his balance and collapse from the sudden weakness shooting through his core. This couldn’t be happening. He caught himself praying for it to be some twisted nightmare that he would wake up from at any moment. He had done everything in his power and the cruel reality was that it hadn’t been enough. Not only had he broken his promise to the person closest to him but that broken promise meant these were their final moments together._

_Jason collapsed to the floor, rolling on his back and grabbing his head in his hands as he cried out in agony. This agony was not physical but emotional. His heart was shattering to pieces in his chest as tears streamed out of his eyes, temporarily blinding him until he tilted his head and let them roll down his face. Rolling onto his side he punched the wooden floor repeatedly in frustration, anger and guilt. Blood stained the floor as the skin of his hand broke and split from the repeated trauma._

_He opened his eyes, not remembering when he had closed them as someone’s arms were lifting him off the floor and back into a sitting position. Kellin pulled him in close so that his head was against his chest. Jason wrapped his arms around him tightly as Kellin reciprocated the action. Another burst of lightning allowed him to see the bite in Kellin’s side, just below his last rib. Jason cuddled in closer and sobbed into his chest, leaving damp patches on his shirt as Kellin’s tears fell into his hair._

_“I’m so, so, so sorry.” Jason choked out between sobs. “Fuck I’m sorry, I fucked up. It should be me. Me. Not you.”_

_Kellin held him tighter, pulling him closer and kissed the top of his head._

_“It’s not your fault.” Kellin reassured him. “If it was you I’d die. I would lose any reason to go on. Then we’d both be dead.”_

_“But isn’t that what is going to happen anyway?” Jason sobbed, staring up at him._

_“No, I don’t want you to kill yourself.” Came the reply as he winced in pain._

_“So I’m supposed to be alone again?” Jason asked in painful confusion._

_“I’ll never leave you, baby.” Another kiss was placed to his forehead. “But I can’t lose anyone else to suicide, no matter what.”_

_Jason lowered his head and cuddled in closer again. “So what then?”_

_“You have to keep going. For me.” Kellin replied between their own sobs. “Because your time to die is not now. You’re supposed to live.”_

_“How do you know that?” Jason asked, not accepting the idea of being left alone._

_“I don’t. But I believe it.” Kellin answered. “Promise me you won’t give up.”_

_Jason cried harder, taking several moments before he could control his breathing enough to answer._

_“I promise.”_

_“There’s two more promises you need to make me.” He could feel the fever starting, the infection attacking his body._

_Jason could sense the distress but forced himself to stay calm enough to talk._

_“What else?” He asked weakly._

_“When the time comes I want you to shoot me.” The request shocked Jason. “I don’t want to be walking around without a soul.”_

_“But…but I don’t have a gun.” Jason admitted, regret striking him hard. He had lost it back at the camp._

_Kellin produced a gun from the back of his belt, a Springfield Armory TRP Operator, the same one he had used earlier, and handed it to Jason as if it was a present._

_“Now you do.”_

_Jason held the gun in his hands for a moment. That’s when he noticed the blood stains on his sleeve from the bite wound in Kellin’s side. He shut his eyes forcefully, scrunching up his face as more tears came bursting out. He holstered the gun, knowing that it would take all his strength and more to pull the trigger when the time came._

_“What’s…what’s the last…last promise?” Jason choked out, his breathing coming out as gasps._

_“Stay with me until time runs out.”_

_Jason’s tears came out faster and harder as he nodded his head violently. He felt a pair of hands cupping his face. He blinked the tears out of his vision and looked into his companion’s brown eyes. Kellin brought them together so they could share a kiss. It was soft, delicate and loving. When they broke apart they held each other close._

_Outside, the rain continued to crash down violently, bouncing off the ground, hammering the roof of the house and pelting the glass windows like small stones. The lighting flashed again, casting the shadow of the couple’s embrace onto the wall before darkness covered it up. The thunder roared across the sky with ferocity._

_“I promise.” Jason whispered, pulling them as close together as possible._

“We stayed like that and talked for a couple hours.” Jason continued to explain to them. He could see the pain in their eyes, his story touched their hearts. “Then he asked me to sing to him one last time. I would always do it when he was upset.”

“What song did you sing to him?” Carl asked, his voice low. He found the story heart-breaking and now he understood why Jason was so damaged.

“A song called Run.” Jason replied. “It just came into my head. It felt appropriate.”

Carl hesitated for a moment before making a request. He didn’t know why but he wanted to hear it, regardless of whether Jason could sing or not.

“Can…can we hear it?” The teen asked.

“I wouldn’t want to hurt your ears.” Jason replied with modesty.

“One of our friends, Beth, used to sing for us.” Rick told him. “It was never about the performance.”

Jason nodded. It was about the meaning. It was about the emotion of it, the connection between people. He took a breath and started to sing.

“I’ll sing it one last time for you, then we really have to go. You’ve been the only thing that’s right in all I’ve done.”

Jason thought about Kellin. How much his life changed because of him and the better, stronger and more complete person Jason had become as a result of knowing him.

“And I can barely look at you but every single time I do. I know we’ll make it anywhere away from here.”

_Jason cuddled into Kellin and softly played with his hair, letting his singing and physical actions translate everything he felt like saying._

“Light up, light up, as if you have a choice. Even if you cannot hear my voice I’ll be right beside you dear.”

Rick thought of Lori. He loved her and he had tried to put things back together. The mistake he had made was assuming there was going to be more time. In this brutal world there never was any time for anything or anyone. As Hershel had once put it, every moment was simply right now.

“Louder, louder and we’ll run for our lives. I can hardly speak I understand why you can’t raise your voice to say.”

_Jason kissed Kellin’s forehead. So many positive memories, so many beautiful moments. So many laughs and smiles. Now it was all about to end. These would be their last moments together._

“To think I might not see those eyes makes it so hard not to cry. And as we say our long goodbyes I nearly do.”

Jason stared into Carl’s eyes. He could see the pain in the boy’s eyes just as Carl could see the agony within his own.

“Light up, light up. As if you have a choice. Even if you cannot hear my voice I’ll be right beside you dear.”

Michonne cast her thoughts to her boyfriend Terry and her son Andre. She had always been willing to do whatever she could for them to keep them safe and to keep them happy. She had lost them both to this disaster and it was something she could never have prevented. That was the reality of it. No one was safe.

“Louder, louder and we’ll run for our lives. I can hardly speak I understand why you can’t raise your voice to say.”

_Jason and Kellin shared another kiss and held each other close. There were so many things he wanted to say. So many moments he wished they could relive even if it was just for a moment. Anything that would delay what was inevitably about to happen._

“Slower, slower, we don’t have time for that. All I want is to find an easier way to get out of our little heads.”

Carl thought about his mother and his baby sister Judith. Both of them lost at the prison for different reasons. The hope and love he had felt when he laid eyes on Judith for the first time was now gone, extinguished forever. Only he and his father remained and Rick wouldn’t live forever either. Carl would lose him one day too. Then he would be alone, the last remaining member of a forgotten family.

“Have heart, my dear, we’re bound to be afraid. Even if it’s just for a few days, making up for all this mess.”

_Jason and Kellin held each other close and sang the chorus one last time together, squeezing each other’s hands._

“Light up, light up as if you have a choice. Even if you cannot hear my voice I’ll be right beside you dear.”

_Kellin’s breathing was slowing as the infection took its toll and zapped the light from him. His grasp on Jason’s hand had also weakened. It was just about time. The song had ended and their time together was also finally at an end._

_Jason kissed Kellin’s forehead and stroked his hair out of his face. His face had gone pale._

_“I love you. I love you so much and I always will.” Jason told him, squeezing his hand as his tears continued to fall._

_“I love you too. Always.” Kellin replied weakly. He smiled. That same smile Jason had fallen in love with the first time they met._

_Kellin’s breathing stopped and his grip on Jason finally loosened. He was gone. Just like that, the most important person in Jason’s life, the only reason he had made it this far, was gone. The last person in the world that he was prepared to lose now lay dead in his arms. Jason wailed with grief, his tears falling on Kellin’s lifeless face._

_As much as he wanted to just sit there and cry himself to sleep he still had something important to do. There was still a promise to keep. Jason pulled out the gun that Kellin had given him and flicked the safety off. He aimed it at Kellin’s head, his hand shaking rapidly as he continued to cry. This one simply muscle movement of pulling the trigger was the hardest thing Jason had ever been forced to do. He held his breath._

_“I’m sorry.”_

_Jason pulled the trigger and shot Kellin’s lifeless body in the head. Reanimation had been prevented. Now he was alone. Nothing would change that. No one would change that. He had to keep his promise. He had to continue living. Jason examined the gun. It was empty. That had been the last bullet. He threw the gun on the floor and held Kellin’s body in his arm and continued to cry._

Jason couldn’t help but cry in front of them. He tried to stop it but he had been holding it back for the entire song. The tears continued to come out. Despite the emotional agony that shot through him there was a sense of relief. He was no longer suffering it alone. He had people who knew. People who cared. Another feeling came to his attention. A pair of arms had wrapped themselves round him. Jason opened his eyes as he accepted the hug. While he was crying he hadn’t noticed Carl move over to cuddle him. He also felt Michonne’s hand rub his back. Opening his eyes he met Rick’s understanding and protective gaze. For the first time in a long time Jason finally felt safe. He finally had purpose again. He had found a new family.

**Finally that chapter is complete. I felt this chapter had to be done before the group reach Terminus and meet the others. The story of what happened with Jason and Kellin has finally been told. His pain has been shared. Although this chapter was centred mainly in flashbacks I hope it was still enjoyable to read and to see all the previous sneak peeks of Jason’s life come together a bit more.**

**The next chapter will have them reaching Terminus but not before having a run-in with some “friends.” :P  
If you found this chapter emotionally taxing to read then that’s good. I found it emotionally draining to write as I often put myself in Jason’s place which isn’t somewhere you would ever want to be. **

**Thanks for the Kudos/follows/subscriptions/bookmarks/favourites etc.**

**Thanks to my reviewers of chapter 6: rk0192, SaraP, AnnaJ, kingcarlgrimes, AmbroseViolence & NukeRose. **

**To those who compare this story to the two amazing stories by BeneathThisMask I would just like to stress that I am not copying the idea or the storyline. The basic idea may be similar but I’ll be going in a completely different direction which hopefully is more in-keeping with The Walking Dead.**

**The idea of OCxMain Character is extremely common, though is usually with Daryl instead of Carl, granted.**

**Anyways, you know the drill. Leave a review and let me know your thoughts on the chapter. ^^**

**In chapter 8 we reach the end of the line. Terminus. ^^**

**Oh and the song is Run by Snow Patrol.**


	8. Inhuman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group make their way to Terminus. However, they are forced to fight for their lives even before they get there. Can they survive? If so, will Terminus be the sanctuary they were promised?

_“Come on, Jason!” The voice yelled. “Focus!”_

_Jason tried his hardest to concentrate and aim correctly. The Glock was getting heavier in his hands the longer this went on. The painted targets were moving erratically around the range and to him they appeared to be getting faster. Officer Shane Walsh’s yelling wasn’t helping him focus._

_He took a shot but missed again. The targets stopped moving. Jason removed the earmuffs as Shane approached._

_“I’m trying, I swear.” Jason pleaded. He knew Shane was a good man and an excellent gun instructor but he was being pretty hard on him right now._

_“Then try harder.” Shane told him. “If you ever need to use one of these chances are your target ain’t gonna stand still for you.”_

_“I’m hoping I never need to.” Jason answered, trying to be pragmatic._

_“What happens if you do have to? Huh?” Shane spat back. “A criminal decides to get revenge on your old man and comes to the house. What then?”_

_Jason lowered his gaze, his hair bangs falling in front of his face._

_“You need to focus. Shut down. Turn off your emotions and act.” Shane explained. “You can’t be human in that moment. You need to be a machine.”_

_“How the hell am I supposed to manage that?” Jason asked. He had always let his emotions guide him. Turning them off was like turning him off._

_“You just do it. You don’t manage it. You do it.” Shane told him. “If someone is counting on you every second counts. You don’t have time to think. You act.”_

_“I can maybe do that in the moment but not right now.” Jason explained. “This is target practice. Not a life or death situation.”_

_“What happens if someone threatens Kellin?” Shane asked him, narrowing his eyes. “You just gonna let them hurt him because he’s too soft and weak to defend himself?”_

_Jason tightened his fist, spun on the spot and punched Shane in the jaw, knocking the larger man off balance. Jason froze where he stood. He instantly regretted striking the man but he hadn’t been thinking in that moment. He was very defensive over his boyfriend for various reasons. No one was permitted to speak ill of him around Jason. Shane’s voice broke him out of his thoughts._

_“Like that! That’s what you need to do.” Shane told him, rubbing his jaw. “Switch off and act.”_

_Now Jason understood. It wasn’t all your emotions that had to shut down. Just the unnecessary emotions of the moment. His love for his family and his desire to protect them was the very thing that should make him focus. He nodded and placed the earmuffs back on his ears._

_Jason turned back to the shooting range, the targets moving again after Shane had started them up again. Jason took aim and took his shots. Focused. He no longer missed._

Jason’s eyes fluttered open as he adjusted to the sudden light that reached them. He sat himself up and rubbed his head as he yawned. From the sun’s position in the sky he could tell it was still early. Sticking to his morning routine he extracted his notebook from his bag and wrote down the tally mark for that day. Jason also marked down a second, separate tally. He returned the notebook to its place in his bag and looked around the camp. Michonne was awake and working out. Carl was still asleep. He smiled as he observed the teen’s sleeping form. Carl looked so innocent as he slept, much like a sleeping puppy. That’s when it occurred to Jason. Rick was missing.

Jason looked around for the man. Given that Michonne was calmly working out he assumed there was no danger. Rick was probably out getting water or food for them so he relaxed and sat against the tree. He still needed to wake up fully and there was no rush to do so. It was still hard for him to get his head round. Here he was with people that cared. Jason hadn’t expected to find such people ever again. Carl’s question from the day before still echoed in his mind. Was he still looking for a good death? He wasn’t sure anymore.

Michonne finished her workout and caught Jason looking over at Carl again. She smiled to herself. It was obvious that there were feelings of affection and protectiveness between the two of them. It was something they all needed to see and feel more of to combat the darkness of the world around them. Michonne felt like she could understand the young man after having heard his story the night before. He was as damaged as the rest of them.

“He’s a good kid.” Michonne told Jason, sitting beside him.

Jason snapped his head away from Carl to look at her before smiling. “Yeah, he is. He’s pure.”

“You should have seen it. The rage in his eyes when he thought Rick had left you for dead.” Michonne explained to him, keeping her voice low so as not to wake the boy. “He cares. A lot. We’re all he has left.”

Jason nodded. He knew that and it meant a lot to him. “Same goes for all of us really.”

The sound of leaves crumpling under foot signalled Rick’s return. He stepped through the gap between the strings of their alarm system and sat opposite Jason. Rick placed a hand on Carl’s back and shook the boy gently so that he would wake. Carl rolled onto his back and yawned, rubbing his eyes before sitting up to avoid sleep taking him once again. They had a long day ahead of them.

Rick got to work with lighting the fire and produced a few cans of food. They wouldn’t be much but it would be something for them to have in their stomachs before they set off towards Terminus yet again. As Rick had estimated the previous day they were two days away from their destination. Jason hoped it would be what it was promised to be. He hated not being able to simply rest for a while.

As Rick used a stick from a tree with a forked top to position the can over their fire he thought for a moment. They were running very low on food.

“I set up some traps.” He told them. “We’re running low on food.”

“I can go without for now.” Jason offered.

“No. We all should get to eat.” Rick countered, glaring at him with authority. Rick wasn’t letting anyone go without food if he could help it.

Rick turned to Carl. “How hungry are you on a scale of one to ten?”

Carl smiled weakly, staring at the fire. “Fifteen.”

Rick turned his attention to Michonne.

“Twenty-eight.” Michonne answered with a weak smile of her own.

Rick then stared at Jason, expecting an answer to the question from him too.

Jason sighed. “Thirty.”

Rick moved the can from the fire, pouring the contents into another can that wasn’t red hot.

“Yeah, well, it’s been a while.” He said as Carl blew out the flame on the end of his stick. “I’m going to check the snares.”

The bearded man stood up straight with his hands in his jacket pockets and kicked the fire out by pushing dirt on top of it.

“Can I come with you?” Carl asked, looking up at his father.

Rick smiled. “Well, how else are you gonna learn?”

Carl stood up and helped put the fire out as Rick set his eyes on Michonne and Jason.

“Both of you too.” He commanded, earning a smile from them both as they picked up their bags.

They left the bags they didn’t immediately need and stepped under the string of their alarm system. The four of them headed in the direction Rick guided them in which was towards the snares he had set up in the early hours of that morning.

“We’ll stay another day or two.” Rick told them. “Get some more rest.”

“Finished healing up?” Michonne asked him, referring to the injuries he received from the Governor.

“I’m almost there.” Rick answered with a nod.

Carl sighed. Like Jason and the others, he was sick of being on the road.

“We’re close now, right?” He asked his father.

“To Terminus?” Rick asked, making sure he knew what his son meant.

“Yeah.” Carl confirmed.

“We are.” Rick answered as they walked through a long clearing in the trees towards the snares.

“When we get there are we gonna tell them?” Carl asked. It was a vague and open question.

“Tell them what?” Michonne asked, like Rick and Jason, she was trying to make sense of the boy’s vague morning questions.

“Everything that’s happened to us.” Carl answered, looking up at Michonne. “All the stuff we’ve done. We gonna tell them the truth?”

Jason thought about that for a moment. He knew he had done some morally questionable things in order to stay alive and there were plenty of things he didn’t want to share with strangers. Looking at the kinds of people Rick, Michonne and even Carl were, he could tell they were the same.

“We tell them what they need to know.” Jason answered.

Carl leaned forward to catch sight of him behind Michonne. “And what do they need to know?”

“We’re gonna tell them who we are.” Rick interjected, linking in with Jason’s statement.

“But how do you say that? I mean…who are we?” Carl asked, confused.

Rick stared at his son, sensing the confusion and not knowing quite how to answer the question. Jason understood Carl’s confusion and felt angry at the world for making such a question valid. None of them were who they were before the apocalypse.

“We are who we have to be.” Jason answered. “And who we choose to be.”

“What do you mean?” Carl asked, still confused.

“Well, we’re hardened survivors. We’re all killers in some way or another.” Jason answered, trying to explain his thoughts as best as he could. “But we’re still good people. We’ve held on to who we used to be.”

The signature snarl of a walker interrupted their discussion as one came stumbling out of the woodland towards them, its arms swinging with the unstable motion of its body. From the other side of the clearing two more walkers staggered into view. Rick and Carl raised their guns while Michonne unsheathed her sword and Jason took out his knife.

Michonne swung her sword swiftly and sliced the top half of the walker’s head clean off. Jason rushed the second walker and stabbed it in the forehead with his knife. He struggled however, as his knife got stuck in the skull of the walker leaving him open to attack from the third walker. Before it could lunge at him, Carl kicked the walker’s kneecap and brought it to the floor. Michonne brought her sword down into its skull and killed it. Jason removed his knife from the skull of the dead walker and put it away again as they continued on their path.

Five minutes later and they came across one of the snares that Rick had set down that morning. A freshly caught rabbit lay dead in the trap.

“Here you go!” Rick exclaimed happily as he rushed over to it, removing the machinegun from around his body.

He knelt down and picked up the rabbit, untying it from the string of the snare.

“It’s a small one but it will do.” Rick told them as he placed it in his bag.

Rick returned his attention to the snare itself so he could teach the others how to make one. He picked up the string.

“So, this is just a simple slip-knot. Tie one at both ends and then tie one end to a branch.” Rick explained, gesturing to the large branch that sat above the snare.

He then gestured to the carved out path on the ground with a line of sticks on either side.

“Now see this funnel shape in the ground?” He asked, staring at Carl.

Carl examined it quickly. “A trail?”

“That’s right!” Rick declared with a nod, setting it up again. “That’s where you want to set the noose.”

He set the noose at the end of the trap and covered it with some leaves.

“You cover it with leaves and put sticks all around it so any animal has to come this way.” Rick explained, running his hand through the trap to the noose. “Right into the trap”

He let his wrist get caught by the noose for added emphasis, the slip-knot tightening instantly around it.

Suddenly a scream broke out close by, a man’s voice screaming for help as he was obviously terrified. Carl took off without a second thought, running in the direction of the man.

“Carl! Carl!” Rick tried to stop his son. “Stop!”

Carl continued to run, forcing Rick, Michonne and Jason to take off after him as fast as they could. The boy had honest intentions but those very intentions could get you killed with the way the world is now. Carl came across an open patch of grass that contained a man surrounded by a group of over twenty walkers. The man was screaming and backing away from the crowd but ultimately was just being encircled by the hungry corpses. Carl took aim with his Beretta.

Suddenly Rick wrapped an arm around his son and pulled him away from the clearing behind a tree. Carl tried to fight the man but his father was too strong. Michonne and Jason stood by with their weapons at the ready as they all watched the man get devoured by the walkers, still screaming in fear and agony as they started a feeding frenzy with his body.

As they watched three of the walkers at the end of the group noticed them. They snarled as they started to approach.

“We’ve gotta go!” Michonne whispered before the group of four took off running in the opposite direction.

They ran as fast as they could and broke out of the woodland back onto the railway. Not far behind them the walkers attempted to follow them, stumbling onto the tracks and snarling as they did so. Ahead of them on the tracks were four walkers feasting on a body, most likely a member of the group the previous screaming man was with. The walkers looked up from their meal and growled before making their approach. Michonne readied her sword, Jason his knife, Rick his revolver and Carl held onto the machinegun his father had been carrying since the house. Carl kept an eye on the walkers behind them as Rick, Michonne and Jason rushed up to the walkers ahead of them to execute them. Rick grabbed his revolver and slammed the barrel into the forehead of the first walker as hard as he could.

 

_Hershel pulled back the curtain that covered the doorway of Rick’s cell. He stood looking in, supported by his crutches as the sunlight streamed in on Rick’s face._

_“Morning.” He announced as Rick opened his eyes, the sunlight stinging them._

_“Is everything okay?” Rick asked, sitting up._

_“Yeah. Just wanted a little help with something.” Hershel answered as Rick sat up in the bed, swinging his legs over the side._

_“What time is it?” Rick asked groggily._

_“I never know what time it is anymore.” Hershel answered as Rick rubbed his eyes with his thumb and forefinger. “Ever since I gave Glenn my watch it’s always right now to me. It’s early.”_

_Rick shook his arm and hand. It was sore from the previous day’s supply run._

_Hershel turned to his youngest daughter, Beth. “He’s decent.”_

_Beth rounded the corner into the cell and lifted baby Judith out of her cot while Rick checked his watch before putting it on._

_“Beth is going to take Judith.” Hershel explained._

_“What are we doing?” Rick asked, curious._

_“You’ll see.” Hershel replied as Rick put on his holster. “You’re not going to need that. It’ll just get in the way.”_

_Rick gave Hershel an incredulous look and clipped it on anyway. It was the zombie apocalypse. You needed a gun no matter what you did or where you went. Rick grabbed his jacket and exited the cell._

Michonne decapitated one of the walkers with her katana as Jason rushed another one. He grabbed the collar of the walker’s blood-stained shirt and reeled it in close so he could stab it in the eye with his knife. The other walker approached but he kicked its kneecap and brought his knife up into the walker’s head as it fell. He kicked the corpse to the side.

“Let’s go!” Rick called. The group behind them was getting thicker and closer.

They all took off running as fast as they could yet again.

 

_Jason grabbed his gun and his hatchet. There were reports of walkers in the vicinity of the camp and he had offered to dispatch them upon daybreak. It was early morning and most people were still asleep. The click of his leg holster was enough to waken Kellin, who was sleeping next to him._

_“Morning poppet.” Jason cooed with a smile. “It’s early. Go back to sleep.”_

_“Where are you going?” Kellin asked him, rubbing his eyes._

_“Perimeter sweep, that’s all.” Jason answered with a shrug, pulling on his leather jacket._

_Kellin got out of bed and wrapped his arms around Jason’s waist, hugging him from behind and rested his chin on Jason’s left shoulder._

_“You know I don’t like it when you go out there.” Kellin commented, his hands rubbing Jason’s stomach softly under his jacket._

_“I know but it has to be done.” Jason answered, leaning back into the hug._

_“It doesn’t have to be you.” Kellin replied. “You don’t have to do everything.”_

_Jason sighed, resting his hands on Kellin’s hands. “I have to keep you safe.”_

_“There’s thirty of us here. Let them secure the camp.” Kellin retorted. “I’m safe. I want to spend time with you.”_

_Jason turned his head in an attempt to stare at Kellin but his lover wouldn’t budge from behind him._

_“You do spend time with me though.” Jason answered. “We always spend time together.”_

_“Time that doesn’t involve the dead.” Kellin added. “Personal time. Time for us and just us.”_

_Jason lifted one of Kellin’s hands to his mouth and kissed it. “Later. I promised to do this.”_

The group had taken to a main road away from the tracks. They had managed to lose the walker horde for the time being but they knew better than to relax too soon. They were exposed and needed to find somewhere to rest as the sun was getting low in the sky.

“Thought there might be some houses down here or a store.” Michonne commented, breathing hard from the exertion. “There’s gotta be some food around here somewhere.”

“Hey look!” Carl called out.

Ahead of them was an abandoned SUV. The lights and grill had fallen off and the back doors were wide open. Debris was scattered over the road along with a walker with a crushed body. They rushed up to the car with Rick and Carl checking for walkers inside of it. Jason scouted the surrounding treeline for any approaching walkers and Michonne walked over to the crushed walker on the side of the road. It reached its one movable arm up at her as it rasped out in an attempt to move. She stabbed the tip of her sword into its temple, flicking the blood off the blade before returning to the others by the car. The SUV wasn’t much but it would have to do.

 

An hour or so later and night had fallen upon them. Rick and Michonne sat outside by the camp fire while Jason sat in the car with Carl. Carl had found it cold and wanted to get comfortable before finally sleeping and Jason had offered to keep him company instead of leaving him on his own in the car. Jason sat in the driver’s seat with his arms folded.

“What do we do if it’s not there anymore?” Carl asked out of the blue.

Jason turned to him, thinking his answer through before replying. “Then I know a place we could go for a while.”

“Is it safe?” Carl asked. He was sick of being out on the road with constant danger lurking round every corner.

“Safer than here at least.” Jason answered. He honestly couldn’t tell what state his previous hide-outs would be in.

“Is loving someone worth it anymore?” Carl asked, yet another question that came out of nowhere.

“What do you mean?” Jason asked, slightly stunned by the wording of the question.

“Well, any one of us could die tomorrow or even tonight.” Carl explained himself, his tone depressingly low. “Won’t love just bring even more pain?”

Jason thought for a moment, looking ahead through the windscreen at the campfire. Carl did have a point but he couldn’t accept it to be true. There was always more than one way to look at things.

“That’s true but it also makes love all the more special.” Jason answered.

“Michonne told me that love is something you act on.” Carl told him, though his hesitant tone showed he still didn’t fully understand what that meant.

“She’s right. The people you know could all die tomorrow.” Jason answered, placing a hand on the boy’s shoulder. “How you make them feel before their time comes is so, _so_ important for that very reason.”

“So you should love someone even if you don’t have long?” Carl asked, trying to understand Jason’s way of thinking.

“Absolutely. I’d rather die having experienced love than died without ever knowing what it felt like.” Jason told him, rubbing his shoulder gently. “You should get some sleep.”

Carl closed his eyes and sighed. “I’m trying but I can’t relax enough.”

Jason moved his hand to the back of Carl’s neck, placing his fingers strongly against it. This earned a gasp from Carl.

“Your hand is freezing!” Carl gasped out.

“Yeah, but it will relax you. Hold still.” Jason told him.

Jason kept his cold hand on the back of Carl’s neck and sure enough the teen began to relax. After a while he could tell Carl was asleep, the expression on his face having softened completely. Jason retracted his hand and quietly stepped out of the car. He put his hands in his jacket pockets and stared up at the stars and thought about his conversation with Carl. He felt it was a shame that Carl still hadn’t experienced the warmth that he himself had felt with Kellin. It was different to friendship or the love of family. It was so much stronger and more intense. He would give that gift, that experience to Carl if he could but it wasn’t his place and never would be. Jason continued to stare at the stars above, lost in his thoughts.

“That was one small rabbit.” Rick commented to Michonne.

“It was something.” Michonne answered. “Got to hand it to the thing. It travelled well.”

Rick chuckled at this.

“Have you noticed that’s all we talk about any more.” Rick commented. “Food. I forgot what this feels like.”

“Me too.” Michonne answered. The prison had softened them a little. “I hope we’re able to forget again soon.”

Rick nodded. “We’re close. Just got to make it through another day.”

He stomped out the fire with some dirt.

“If folks there are taking people in, they have to be strong.” Rick continued. “They have to have a system.”

“I wonder if the whole thing is legit.” Michonne argued. She had been to Woodbury with the Governor and was suspicious of any repeats.

A twig snapped somewhere in the forest, alerting them. There was no snarling. No walkers. Rick stood up and looked around. It was too dark to see anything clearly but there were no other sounds. Perhaps a squirrel had broken a twig off a branch or something. Rick sat back down.

“We let people in.” Rick countered. Not everywhere could be bad.

“We did.” Michonne retorted. “But so did the Governor.”

“Yeah, it’s always the same isn’t it? We don’t get to know until we know.” Rick said with a nod of his head. “Maybe this place isn’t even there anymore.”

 A sudden movement caught his vision and his ears as the barrel of a gun rested on his temple.

“Oh dearie me!” A voice suddenly declared.

Michonne reached for her sword but it was kicked away by another man who pointed a revolver at her. Two other men came out of the darkness and aimed their weapons at Rick and Michonne.

“You screwed up asshole.” The older man said to Rick. “You hear me? You screwed up.”

Jason jumped out from behind the car with his gun drawn. He aimed it at the older man who he had quickly identified as the leader of the group.

“Drop your guns.” Jason growled.

The older man chuckled at him. “Or what? You going to pull the trigger?” He questioned Jason. “Because if you do that you’re all as good as dead.”

“Maybe.” Jason countered. “But you won’t get to see it.”

“You’ve got spirit, kid.” The grey haired man commented. “Len!”

From the darkness another man appeared and smacked Jason in the back of the head with an assault rifle. Jason collapsed on his front, dropping his gun to the ground in the process. His head spun and his vision went blurry from the sudden head trauma. The man above him placed their foot on his back and pressed the barrel of their gun into the back of his neck.

Carl awoke to a fatter man pressing himself against the window of the car with a large blade in his hand. He looked out to see Rick and Michonne held at gunpoint and he couldn’t see Jason. Panic and fear shot through him. What was he supposed to do?

“Today is a day of reckoning, sir. Restitution.” The older man spoke into Rick’s ear. “A balancing of the whole damn universe.”

Jason tried to move but with the barrel of the rifle against his neck and his gun out of reach he had little hope of accomplishing anything.

“Shit, and I was thinking of turning in for the night on New Year’s Eve!” The grey haired man exclaimed. Rick recognised the voices now. They were the men from the house.

The man laughed in delight. “Now who’s going to count down the ball dropper with me, huh?”

Jason growled. They were all going to die in mere moments unless one of them done something fast. The man began to count.

“Ten Mississippi. Nine Mississippi.” He counted down loudly. “Eight Mississippi.”

“Joe!” A voice called out from the darkness.

Jason groaned. Not another one. They were outnumbered and outmatched. What kind of an end to life was this going to be? Shot and killed by some vengeful bandits. Jason turned his head to look up at the final member of the despicable group. He held a crossbow in one hand and a black bag in the other. He wore thick boots and clothes including a leather body warmer and his hair was at neck length. Jason turned back to see looks of shock on Rick and Michonne’s faces. They must have known this last guy.

“Hold up.” The man told the grey haired man, now known as Joe.

“You’re stopping me on eight, _Daryl_.” Joe responded.

That’s when it clicked for Jason. Carl had mentioned one of their group being called Daryl, one of the people they believed dead. That same person had also owned a crossbow that Carl wanted to learn how to shoot. _This was him_.

“Just hold up.” Daryl told the leader of the group, approaching Rick and Michonne.

“This is the guy who killed Lou, so we got nothing to talk about.” The man with a rifle hissed.

“The thing about nowadays is we got nothing but time.” Joe answered the other man before turning back to Daryl. “Say your piece, Daryl.”

Daryl was visibly nervous. Jason could tell from the body language but there was also a strange confidence. It was loyalty.

“These people, you’re gonna let them go.” Daryl told the man, his voice low. “These are good people.”

“Now I think Lou would disagree with you on that.” Joe answered with an incredulous smile. “I’ll, of course, have to speak for him and all, because your friend here strangled him in a bathroom.”

Daryl took another step forward. “You want blood, I get it.”

He dropped his bag and crossbow and held his arms out at hip height. “Take it from me, man. Come on.”

Jason grunted as he tried to move. Daryl, their friend from when this whole thing started, was about to sacrifice himself for them. He couldn’t let that happen.

Joe’s face was riddled with hurt and betrayal.

“This man killed our friend. You say he’s good people.” Joe spoke slowly. “Now you see that right there is a _lie_.”

Daryl seemed to weaken in place, lowering his hands as if accepting some kind of defeat.

“It’s a _lie_!” Joe repeated angrily.

The two men who had been aiming at Rick and Michonne descended on Daryl, hitting him, striking him, beating him and pounding him up against the side of the car. In the mix of grunts and blows, Jason could swear he heard Rick growl out in defiance.

“Teach him fellas, teach him all the way!” Joe ordered them, the smile back on his face.

Jason heard the door of the SUV open and a cry from Carl. The fat man came into view, holding Carl in place with a knife to his throat.

“You leave him be!” Rick bellowed, trying to stand up but was forced back down by Joe.

“Don’t you touch him!” Jason roared, lifting himself up with enough force to move the man’s foot off his back.

It did no good. As soon as he rolled over he received a kick to the face, bursting his lip open and dazing him yet again. This time with the barrel pointed at his face. The long haired man grinned maliciously.

Carl cried in fear as the man shushed him, pushing his fat lips and nose against the boy’s ear. Carl tried to fight but his movements were restricted by the blade pressed against his neck. Michonne tried to move out of desperation but quickly realised it was pointless.

“You’ll get yours.” The man holding her at gunpoint spat. “You just wait your turn.”

Jason felt sweat pouring down his face from the anxiety and the adrenaline. He had to do something. Carl was at knife point, Rick and Michonne were at gunpoint and Daryl was getting slowly beaten to death.

“Let them go! I killed your friend.” Jason shouted at them in desperation. “ _I killed him_. _I’m_ the one you want!”

Rick and Michonne glared over at the young man. They hadn’t expected that from him in this kind of situation. Rick knew they were all going to be killed regardless of who actually committed the crime. Carl’s cries loudened, it was hard to tell if it was from fear for his own safety or from Jason’s last ditch attempt to save them.

“All you did was shoot at us, son.” Joe answered Jason’s confession. “You didn’t hit us either. So quit your lying.”

Rick raised his shoulders, rage and adrenaline surging through him. “Listen, it was me. It was just me!”

Joe lowered himself to just above Rick’s head.

“See, now that’s right. That’s not some damn lie.” Joe replied calmly. “Look, we can settle this. We’re reasonable men.”

Rick doubted an apology was going to fix this. His doubts were quickly confirmed as Daryl hit the ground, his face bleeding.

“First, we’re going to beat Daryl to death. Then we’ll have the girl.” Joe taunted him sadistically. “Then we’ll beat your friend to death. Then we’ll have the boy. Then I’m gonna shoot you and then we’ll be square.”

Joe laughed malevolently in Rick’s ear. Daryl’s beating continued to get worse. Michonne was powerless. Rick was powerless. The fat man pushed Carl onto the ground, holding him down and trying to get to his belt. Joe continued laughing. Jason grabbed the barrel of the gun above him and forced it aside, trying to break free but received a kick to the ribs as a result. Carl continued to cry in fear.

“Let him go.” Rick growled.

“Stop your squirming.” The fat man cackled, overpowering Carl.

Rick looked straight ahead of him. His body was shaking. Rage was boiling inside of him. What little self-control he had left was rapidly slipping away. His son was in danger. His friends were in danger. His _son_ was in danger. Joe continued laughing. His rage boiled more. Daryl’s beating continued. His rage bubbled to the surface. His son cried out more. _His son was in danger_. The rage reached the surface. Fury became Rick’s master.

“Let him go!” Rick growled icily.

Joe continued to laugh in his ear. Carl cried out again. The fat man cackled.

Suddenly Rick snapped his head back, striking Joe in the nose with the top of his head. The older man stumbled back from the blow and fired his gun out of reflex. The gunshot rang in Rick’s ears, making him go slightly dizzy. He was also drunk with raw anger. His fury had exploded. These men would die. Rick was going to kill all of them, starting with Joe.

Rick stood up and punched Joe in the face. His blow was weak however as his ribs on that side had not fully healed. Joe struck Rick in the face with his pistol, knocking him to the floor and kicking his ribs.

“I got him.” Joe told the others. “Oh, it’s gonna be so much worse now!”

Carl continued to try and fight his way out from under the fat man above him. He reached for the blade but it was out of his reach. The man cackled in his face as he forced him onto his front.

Rick tried to get up but his body wasn’t responding. His head was spinning and his vision was blurry from being pistol whipped in the temple.

Daryl was on the ground, the men above him were striking him over and over again. He could no longer fight back.

Michonne tried to grab the revolver but was smacked back into submission.

The man pinning Jason down started kicking him repeatedly in the side. His leather jacket absorbed some of the impact but it wouldn’t be long before his ribs started to crack. Jason turned his head away from his assailant to meet Carl’s terrified eyes.

“Carl! You’re not alone!” Jason shouted desperately. “We’re getting out of this. I _promise_!”

The sheer terror in Carl’s eyes told Jason the teen didn’t believe a word of it.

Rick still couldn’t get on his feet. His head was spinning too much.

“Come on! Get up!” Joe snarled at him.

Daryl used what little strength he had left to try and fight back but the two men slammed him against the car before striking him back down.

“Come on!” Joe taunted. “Let’s see what you got!”

The fat man pinned Carl’s head to the floor. He had got Carl’s belt and jeans loose and was now working on his own. He continued to cackle as Carl screamed in terror and pain.

Jason tried to grab the gun again but was kicked on the other side of his face. He spat out blood onto the leaves beside him and tried to snake his hand into his jacket pocket without being seen.

“You leave him be!” Rick growled and charged at Joe.

“Right over here!” Joe called out as he caught Rick in a bear hug. “What the hell are you gonna do now, sport?”

Rick had one thought going through his mind. Protect Carl. He was going to kill every last one of them. _Starting with Joe_.

Rick thrust his head forward and sank his teeth into Joe’s neck. He bit down as hard as he could and pulled back strongly, ripping the older man’s jugular out. Blood spurted everywhere as Joe gargled out in shock and pain. Rick spat out the flesh and blood from Joe’s neck as the man slowly slumped to the ground.

Everyone froze in shock.

Jason saw his chance. He brought his knife out of his pocket and slammed it into the man’s ankle with as much force as he could. The man cried out in pain and fell on his side. Jason pounced on the man and stabbed him in the chest repeatedly. Twice. Three times. Four times. Five times. Blood splattered everywhere as the man’s life was taken. The sixth stab was to his forehead. Jason left the knife in the man’s skull and grabbed his gun.

Michonne took advantage of the distraction and grabbed the revolver from the hand of her assailant. Before he could react she shot him in the head before shooting one of the men beating Daryl too.

Daryl punched the other man to the ground and started beating him with new found strength, adrenaline coursing through his veins.

Michonne turned her gun to the fat man who had stood up and had Carl at knifepoint again.

“Let the boy go!” Michonne demanded.

“I’ll kill him! I’ll kill him!” The man yelled in a blind panic.

Cold steel pressed against the back of his head. Before he could react a gloved hand ripped the blade from his hand and a boot slammed into the back of his knee. The fat man dropped to his knees with the cold barrel of a gun pressed to the back of his head.

“No. You _won’t_.” Jason growled furiously and prepared to pull the trigger.

Daryl finished off the man he was beating with a strong kick to the head.

Rick took the large blade that had belonged to Joe out from the man’s belt. He glared over at the fat man that Jason held at gunpoint. Carl ran over into Michonne’s arms.

“He’s mine.” Rick declared. His tone was ice cold.

Jason holstered his gun and backed away. He couldn’t believe what he was seeing. If looks could kill, Rick’s glare could decimate entire armies.

Rick marched over to the fat man who held his hands up.

“Stay back! Please!” He pleaded for his life, standing up.

Rick grabbed his collar and thrust the knife into the man’s stomach as deep as he could go. Blood erupted from the man’s mouth along with a gargled cry of agony. He screamed in terror and excruciating pain as Rick forced the blade upward and into his chest. Rick was opening him up like a bag.

Carl watched on with hatred and fear in his eyes. Michonne held him close as she too was in shock at the violent display from Rick. Jason was stunned. He couldn’t move or speak.

Rick held the man by the throat as he pulled the blade as far up as the man’s collarbones. The man dropped to his knees from shock and blood loss. That’s when Rick started to stab him.

One. Two. Three. Four. Five.

Daryl rested on the hood of the car as he watched Rick mutilate the man who had attempted to rape his son.

Six. Seven. Eight. Nine. Ten.

The stabs now sounded like the knife was going into sludge. Blood was pouring everywhere out of the man’s body. Carl continued to watch. Michonne had to close her eyes, the sight was too much for her.

Eleven. Twelve. Thirteen. Fourteen. Fifteen.

Jason watched in horror as Rick continued to stab the man until there was nothing left. The man was long since dead but Rick continued stabbing him. Now Jason truly understood how protective Rick was of his son. He hadn’t been exaggerating when he had warned Jason that he would be gutted if he touched Carl the wrong way.

Sixteen. Seventeen. Eighteen. Nineteen. Twenty.

Rick’s arm had gone numb. His whole body had gone numb. All that he could feel was hatred. Pure, all-consuming hatred for the dead man in his hands. No one threatened his son and got to live. No one tried to rape his son and got to live. No one threatened to kill his son and got to live. Rick would kill anything or anyone that was a threat to Carl. No exceptions.

Twenty-one. Twenty-two. Twenty-three. Twenty-four. Twenty-five.

 

_Hershel tapped a patch of grass in the prison courtyard with one of his crutches._

_“Here.” He announced._

_Rick walked over to him, his jacket now on. “What is?”_

_“Those feral pigs in the forest? It doesn’t take much to domesticate them. Same with the horses we’ve seen.” Hershel explained. “We have seeds. We can grow our own food. It’s time we started planting.”_

_Rick nodded. It sounded reasonable and reduce the need for runs. “Okay.”_

_Hershel leaned forward slightly. “I can’t do it myself.”_

_Rick smiled as he glanced over at Daryl who was prepping his motorcycle for the next supply run._

_“I got to go out there.” Rick answered. “Go on runs, be at the fences.”_

_Hershel hopped closer. “I teach you how to do this. You teach Carl. We’re going to be here a while.”_

_Rick looked over at Daryl again. “They need me.”_

_“We’ve been here two months. You’ve made it work.” Hershel told him. The Governor was also gone. “The war is over, Rick.”_

_Rick refused to let his guard down so quickly. “No, we don’t know that.”_

_“I’m talking about you.” Hershel stared into Rick’s eyes. “I’m saying it, and I’m saying this. You pull Carl back from going out there, fine. He shot that boy.”_

_Rick looked down. That was one of his biggest failures as a father, failing to see the monster the world was turning his son into._

_“Yeah, I know.”_

_“He needs his father. He needs his father to show him the way.” Hershel continued. “What way are you going to show him?”_

_Rick studied Hershel as he tried to find an answer within his own mind. Though his responsibilities as a father were of the upmost importance, so were his responsibilities as a leader._

_“He can shoot, we know that. What’s his life going to be?” Hershel added. “What’s yours?”_

_Hershel looked around at the prison. They had people, food, water, space, thick walls, fences, weapons and organisation. They were surviving. They were living._

_“All this. I’m just saying everything because I owe you. We all owe you.” Hershel continued. “We can make this better now.”_

_Rick knew Hershel was right but at the same time they couldn’t afford to get complacent. The world outside of their fences was a nightmare, an endless nightmare filled with danger and death._

_“Things changing in here doesn’t change things out there.” Rick countered._

_“No it doesn’t. But we’re here right now, today.” Hershel answered. “This is a good place to start.”_

_Rick looked over at Daryl who was revving his engine to make sure there were no problems with the bike._

_“There’s a run soon.” Rick told the old man in front of him. “I got to go.”_

_Hershel smiled. “No, you don’t.”_

_Rick stared back before finally walking off towards Daryl._

Rick sat against the SUV. His face, front and hands were caked the blood from the night before. The sun had risen an hour ago. His hands shook. For all the efforts to create a place they could live it had been lost. He had tried to protect his son from the horrors of the world but they could never run away from them for long. Rick knew now what he had to do, what he had to become to keep Carl safe. His actions the night before would have been some of the most horrific things imaginable in his life before the apocalypse. Now, they were justified. Necessary. Rick refused to become a monster but if he had to unleash his inner monster to keep his friends and family safe then that is what he would do. In the past, he had found it hard to come to terms with his own brutality but now he had found inner peace with it. Being brutal kept Carl alive. That’s all that mattered.

 

_Kellin awoke to find Jason clipping on his holster. He groaned in frustration. He hated it when Jason went out on perimeter watch. He hated anything that made Jason and violence mix. He got up and crept up behind his lover, placing his hand on the holster to unclip it._

_“No.” He whispered into Jason’s ear._

_Jason turned to him. “I have to.”_

_“No.” Kellin said, throwing the holster and the gun inside it a few feet away._

_“I have to help them. You know that, babe.” Jason tried to argue his case._

_“There are others. It doesn’t always have to be you.” Kellin argued. “I hate it. I hate it when you’re out there. One day you won’t come back.”_

_“I’d never let that happen.” Jason replied, stroking Kellin’s hair. “I’d never abandon you.”_

_Kellin wrapped his arms around Jason’s waist. “Then prove it. Don’t go today. No more violence.”_

_Jason sighed. He was conflicted. He was one of the best in their camp when it came to firearms but he was getting tired of always being on the front lines. Looking into Kellin’s gaze which mirrored that of a puppy begging he felt his resolve melting._

_“I can’t forget about violence completely.” Jason told his soul mate. “Violence keeps us alive.”_

_Kellin pulled Jason closer, cuddling into him. “I know. But having you is what really keeps me alive.”_

_Jason kissed his boyfriend’s forehead and hugged him back. Now he understood. Kellin lived every day fearing for Jason’s safety. Jason wouldn’t tolerate it._

_“Okay.” He whispered. “Okay. I’ll stop.”_

_Kellin smiled. It wasn’t a proud smile or a smile of victory. It was a smile of relief. Of comfort. They shared a kiss before footsteps approached their tent. They separated._

_One of their camp members opened the door of the tent and looked in._

_“Jason, you coming?” He asked, his gun in hand._

_“No. I’m tired.” Jason answered. “About time someone else pulls their weight a bit more.”_

_The man seemed to accept Jason’s answer as he closed the door and wandered off. Disappointment had been on his face but Jason couldn’t care less._

_Jason turned back to Kellin and embraced him._

_“Where were we?” He asked with a smile before closing the gap between them._

Jason wiped the blood off his face with a cloth he had retrieved from his bag. His side ached and his lips were swollen from where the kicks had split them open. The introduction to Daryl had been interesting for him. This was indeed the same Daryl they had known since the start of the apocalypse and was famous for his crossbow skills. Daryl’s reaction to the short version of Jason’s story had been a positive one, declaring Jason a friend by association with Rick, Carl and Michonne.

Michonne and Carl were inside the SUV. She had managed to sooth the boy to sleep on her lap though she herself hadn’t slept at all.

Jason approached Rick and sat down next to him.

“I’m sorry.” Jason apologised, not looking at the man. “I should have done more.”

Rick stared at him intensely, nudging him so the young man would stare back.

“Hey. You did enough.” Rick told him. “You did more than enough. You tried to sacrifice yourself to save us.”

Jason nodded. “As soon as I saw what they were planning to do to Carl…”

Jason couldn’t finish the sentence. He wanted to but he couldn’t find the words. It had been an act of desperation, a desperate attempt to save Carl from such an awful fate no matter what the cost.

“You have nothing to feel sorry for.” Rick told him. “You’re one of us.”

Jason nodded. It meant a lot for Rick to repeat his place in the group. He had felt so powerless when the group of men descended upon them. The only one truly strong enough to make a difference had been Rick. The love of a father for his son was a fearsome weapon. Jason didn’t talk about what Rick had done. He didn’t want to go there. The brutality had been obtuse and disproportionate. On the other side of the car, there was still a pool of blood where Rick had stabbed the man over thirty times.

Daryl returned from where he had been and rested his crossbow against the front of the car. He took a cloth out from his pocket and poured water on it as he approached Rick. Rick raised his hand.

“No, we should save it to drink.” Rick argued.

“You can’t see yourself.” Daryl answered, handing the cloth over. “ _He_ can.”

Daryl was referring to Carl. Rick understood that when Carl woke up it was better for his face to be clean instead of still being caked in blood. He didn’t need an instant reminder of the night before. Rick started wiping the blood off his face, surprised at how much was appearing on the cloth. Daryl sat down next to him on the opposite side from Jason.

“I didn’t know what they were.” Daryl defended himself.

“How’d you wind up with them?” Rick asked, staring at Daryl.

“I was with Beth. We got out together.” Daryl explained, referring to the prison. “I was with her for a while.”

Daryl’s silence concerned Rick. Beth wasn’t with them and Daryl was uncharacteristically silent.

“Is she dead?” Rick asked. Had they failed to save Beth as well as Hershel?

“She’s just gone.” Daryl answered. He would have to explain the story at a later date.

Rick accepted the explanation for now and nodded. Beth could still be alive. That was something.

“After that, that’s when they found me. I mean, I knew they were bad but…” Daryl explained. “But they had a code. It was simple. Stupid. But it was something. It was enough.”

Rick was starting to make sense of the whole situation. Daryl had been left on his own after Beth’s disappearance and despite the evil of that group of men, there was always safety in numbers.

“And you were alone.” Rick stated.

“Said they were looking for some guy. Last night they said they spotted him.” Daryl explained solemnly. “I was hanging back. I was going to leave. But I stayed.”

Daryl took a breath. Guilt was welling up inside of him.

“That’s when I saw it was you four. Right when you saw me.” Daryl explained, his voice almost a whisper. “I didn’t know what they could do.”

Daryl looked down. The pain of his guilt was stronger than the aching of his physical injuries. Rick studied the hunter for a moment. He could see the guilt on Daryl’s face.

“It’s not on you, Daryl.” Rick leaned his head forward, getting the other man’s attention. “Hey, it’s not on you.”

Daryl’s face showed that he was still beating himself up inside. He had assisted the men who almost tortured and killed his friends.

“You being back with us here, now, that’s everything.” Rick continued. “You’re my _brother_.”

Emotion surged through Daryl’s face. The only real brother he had ever had was abusive and had never really been there for him. He had lost Merle to the Governor many months before. Now Rick had named him his brother. Any doubts of trust or loyalty had instantly been dissolved.

Daryl glanced at Rick’s blood-stained hands.

“Hey, what you did last night.” He commented. “Anybody would have done that.”

Rick shook his head. “No, not _that_.”

Daryl tried to justify Rick’s brutality in his own mind. “Something happened. That ain’t you.”

Rick sighed. “Daryl, you saw what I did to Tyreese. It ain’t all of it but that’s me.”

Unbeknownst to Rick, Carl had awakened inside the car and was listening to his father’s words in shock but also in understanding.

“That’s why I’m here now. That’s why Carl is. I want to keep him safe. That’s all that matters.” Rick finished.

“I would have done something similar.” Jason commented. “If anyone had threatened Kellin like that.”

“Kellin?” Daryl questioned. He didn’t know Jason’s backstory.

Rick wasn’t sure if it was his place to say but Jason opened up.

“My boyfriend. He died six months ago. He got bit.” Jason explained. “I would have died to save him.”

Rick turned to Jason. “You were willing to die to save us, to save Carl.”

Jason stared back at Rick. “I was also willing to kill. I _did_.”

“We all did.” Daryl commented, earning a nod from both Rick and Jason.

Despite the horrors of the night before and the profound conversation they were having, Jason took out his notebook and continued with his morning routine. One tally for another day without Kellin. One tally for another day with his new family.

 

They had been walking along the tracks for a few hours. They had scavenged the supplies and weapons from the group that attacked them. Rick and Michonne led the way, Daryl walked in the middle and Jason and Carl were at the back. Carl had been very quiet the whole day and Jason had noticed it.

Michonne studied Rick for a moment before he turned to her. “You okay?”

“Yeah.” Michonne answered with a nod.

“I’m okay.” Rick told her, expecting her to return the question.

“I know.” Michonne replied with another nod.

Rick hadn’t expected that. “How?”

“Because I’m okay too.” Michonne answered.

Rick accepted that answer and continued to lead the way.

Jason stared at Carl, trying to read the fourteen-year-old’s blank face. The boy was a mystery and he was obviously hurt from the night before. He hated the cut on Carl’s cheek. It looked like it stung constantly. At least that bastard got what he deserved. Jason knew there was more to Carl’s silence than just that but he wasn’t sure how to get it out of him.

“You okay, Carl?” Jason asked lowly. Rick couldn’t hear them but he knew Daryl could.

Carl barely nodded but he nodded nonetheless. Jason didn’t like the reaction.

“You sure?” He asked softly, stepping closer to the teen.

“Yeah.” Carl replied weakly. “Just want to get to Terminus already.”

Jason placed a hand on the boy’s shoulder but immediately removed it when Carl flinched in reaction to it. Carl was edgy about being touched after what happened.

“Sorry. I’m sorry.” Jason whispered, realising his mistake.

Carl nodded. He knew he had no reason to flinch from Jason but he couldn’t help it. He didn’t want anyone to touch him. It wasn’t just the horror of what had almost happened that was bothering Carl. Yet again he had been different from the others. Michonne fought back. Daryl fought back. Jason fought back. Rick fought back. Carl was simply dominated. Carl had to be rescued. A weak boy who couldn’t save anyone. He was a burden on them. He knew it.

They came upon another sign for Terminus. They were at the end of the line. It wasn’t far if they continued going straight on.

“We getting close.” Daryl pointed out. “Be there before sundown.”

“Now we head through the woods.” Rick told them. “We don’t know who they are.”

“Alright.” Daryl answered and made his way towards the trees.

As they all veered off the tracks and into the woods, Rick caught sight of Carl’s quieter demeanour and Jason’s visible concern.

Birds chirped above them as they made their way through the trees towards a fence. It was the perimeter fence of Terminus. Rick dropped his bag and kept his body low and his gun drawn as he approached the fence. They all followed him with their weapons at the ready. Jason and Carl with their guns and Daryl with his crossbow. Terminus appeared to be quiet. No signs of life could be seen from where they stood.

“We all spread out, watch for a while.” Rick told them, keeping his voice low. “See what we see and get ready. We all stay close.”

Daryl headed off in one direction while Michonne headed off in the opposite direction from Daryl. Carl started to walk but was stopped by Rick.

“You want to stick with me?” Rick asked his son.

“It’s alright.” Carl answered and walked off after Michonne.

Jason stayed with Rick for a moment, looking through the fence at Terminus.

“I think he’s still in shock or something.” Jason commented quietly.

“He was nearly raped.” Rick answered with the obvious.

“That and witnessing what you did.” Jason replied. “I knew you would do something but I didn’t expect _that_.”

“You saying he’s afraid of me?” Rick asked, curious and concerned.

“I don’t know.” Jason shrugged. “But I don’t think so.”

Jason left the statement hanging in the air as he went over to their bags. He pulled out two serrated switchblades and some tape. Rick stared at him with confusion framed on his expression.

“What are you doing?” He asked the young man.

“Getting ready.” Jason answered, sitting down and taking one of his boots off.

Carl walked alongside Michonne, still quiet and visibly upset.

“Why didn’t you go with your dad?” Michonne asked softly, holding her sword at the ready as they walked.

Carl put his free hand in the pocket of his jumper, his other hand holding his Beretta. He didn’t answer.

“When I told you about Andre.” Michonne commented. “You never asked _how_ he died.”

“I knew why.” Carl answered.

“Yeah but the how is important.” Michonne countered.

They stopped walking as Michonne told Carl her story.

“We went to a refugee camp, Andre and my boyfriend, Mike. That was Andre’s father. And our friend Terry.” Michonne explained. “At the camp, it just got worse and worse. People were leaving. People were giving up.”

Carl stared at Michonne, fascinated by her story but preparing himself for the sad ending it would inevitably have.

“But I didn’t. I was coming back from a run. I saw the fences were down.” Michonne explained, shuddering. “I heard the moans. It was over. Mike and Terry, they were high when it happened. They were bit.”

Michonne couldn’t stop some tears from rolling down her face.

“I could have stopped it. Could have killed them. But I let them turn.” Michonne continued. “I made it so they couldn’t bite, couldn’t scratch. I tied chains around their necks.”

Carl stared at her with a mix of pain and horror at the image she had put into his head.

“It was insane. It was sick. It felt like what I deserved.” Michonne told him. “Dragging them around so that I would always know. I found out that they kept me safe.”

Michonne couldn’t help but reflect on the irony of the situation. Her self-punishment helped keep her alive. She smirked briefly.

“They hid me. The walkers didn’t see me anymore.” She explained. “I was just another monster. And I was. Me. I was gone for a long time.”

Carl understood that she meant the psychological damage it had caused her. He remembered how closed off and cold she was when she first appeared at the prison fences.

“But then Andrea brought me back. Your dad brought me back.” Michonne smiled through the tears. “You did.”

Carl lowered his head. It was a lot to take in. He might have felt physically powerless to save people but here was Michonne telling him that he emotionally saved her. He saved her soul so to speak. That was arguably more important and much more difficult. Michonne lowered her head to peer under his hat.

“I see how you’ve been looking at your dad. You don’t have to be afraid of me.” Michonne told him. “Or him. Or Jason. We’re family.”

Carl fought to keep his emotions in check, to stop the tears from falling. Michonne had successfully broken down his barriers.

“He told me the other day that he was proud of me. That I was a good man.” Carl told her in a solemn whisper. “I’m not. I know more now. About what he wanted from me. And I tried but…”

Carl felt the grief and guilt wrapping round him, clutching at his heart like a vice.

“I still have these thoughts. I’m not what he thinks I am.” Carl shook his head as the tears began to show themselves. “I’m just another monster too.”

Michonne hugged Carl softly. Now she understood what had been bothering him. It was only as she looked over Carl’s hat did she spot him. Jason stood behind Carl, leaning his arm against a tree.

“Carl. You’re not a monster.” Jason told him, causing the boy to break the hug and turn round. “Monsters don’t have a conscience. Those men back there? They were monsters.”

Jason walked up to him and stared into the boy’s eyes.

“The fact that you are so upset shows you are _not_ a monster.” Jason continued. “You _are_ a good man. So is your dad.”

“But what my dad did last night. I wanted to do that and more.” Carl retorted, tears rolling down his cheeks. “How can I be a good man and have those thoughts?”

“Because even the best people have to do the most brutal things to survive.” Jason answered, placing his hands on Carl’s shoulders and rubbing them softly.

“If you kill to protect. You’re not a monster.” Jason continued. “I stabbed a man to death last night because I made you a promise.”

“I’m just a burden. You all can fight. I can’t.” Carl spat, looking down.

“You’re young. You have saved us so many times.” Jason told the boy. “You have saved who we are. The good people inside us. You’ve stopped us from becoming monsters.”

Carl didn’t answer, he just stared at his feet. His hat obscured his face yet again.

“You said we should share our pain, right?” Jason reminded him.

Carl looked up and nodded.

“The scar on my stomach? I got it when two thieves tried to take my things.” Jason told him. “What I didn’t tell you was that they tried to rape me that night too.”

Carl’s eyes widened in shock. He hadn’t expected that. How could someone as apparently strong as Jason be put into the same position he had been last night. Powerless and defenceless?

“I killed them both in the most brutal way I could for that.” Jason told him. “So don’t think for one minute that you’re weak or that you’re a monster. You’re neither.”

“When I was alone for six months, I was dead inside. I wasn’t any different than the walkers.” Jason continued, staring firmly into Carl’s eyes. “Just like Michonne, you brought me back. I owe you, Carl.”

Jason pulled Carl in for a tight hug which the boy accepted and reciprocated. He rubbed Carl’s back and let the teen cry out the remaining tears. He just needed some comfort before they faced whatever Terminus had in store for them.

“We’re a family.” Michonne commented, placing a hand on each of them. “We look out for each other.”

Rick observed the exchange from afar. He would have to remember to thank Michonne and Jason for being the friends that Carl needed. Rick understood that some things were just difficult for Carl to talk to him about. It was natural. He glanced back at Terminus. They needed to be ready.

 

After ten minutes of digging he had made a decent sized hole. Rick dropped the gun bag into the hole, placing his revolver inside the bag as well. He swapped it for Joe’s Smith & Wesson SW1911SC E-Series pistol.

Daryl studied what Rick was doing, his expression told Rick the long haired man was curious.

“Just in case.” Rick told him and started burying the bag.

Once the bag was buried they climbed over the fence, one of the few sections that didn’t have barbed wire at the top. They all kept their weapons at the ready. Rick with the Smith & Wesson handgun, Carl with his Beretta, Jason with his Operator, Daryl with his crossbow and Michonne with her sword. They quickly darted across the train tracks towards a white door that had been left wide open.

They opened the door and quietly slipped in. They could hear a woman’s voice.

“Follow the tracks to the point where all lines intersect.”

Daryl glanced through the next doorway to find an older woman at a radio station complete with microphone.

“There are maps at the crossings to help guide you with your journey.”

Looking at the rest of the large building they could spot a small group of people painting new signs.

“Sanctuary for all. Community for all.”

The group decided to step into the room, keeping their weapons at the ready.

“Terminus. Sanctuary for all. Community for all. Those who arrive survive.”

“Hello.” Rick announced, getting the woman’s attention before turning to the rest of the people in the room. “Hello!”

They all turned. One of the men in the middle, a young man not much older than Jason, dropped a paint brush and let out an exasperated sigh.

“Well, I bet Albert is on perimeter watch.” He commented to the rest of them.

The man stepped forward towards the group of five newcomers. Jason wasn’t sure he felt comfortable. No one there appeared to be armed.

“You here to rob us?” The man asked, standing in the centre of the room.

“No.” Rick answered flatly. “We wanted to see you before you saw us.”

Rick stepped forward and holstered his gun. Carl and Jason did the same.

“Makes sense. Usually we do this where the tracks meet.” The man stated, stepping forward and clearing his throat. “Welcome to Terminus.”

Rick and the others stared at him in silence.

“I’m Gareth.” The man introduced himself. “Looks like you’ve been on the road for a good bit.”

Rick nodded. “We have.”

He decided to introduce the group.

“Rick. That’s Carl, Jason, Daryl, and Michonne.”

Gareth waved to them with a smile.

“You’re nervous, I get it. We were all the same way.” Gareth said, stepping forward with a smile. “We came here for sanctuary. That what you’re here for?”

Rick nodded. “Yes.”

“Good. You found it.” Gareth answered. “Hey Alex!”

Another dark haired man walked up to them. Jason reckoned they were brothers.

“This is nothing like the front. We’ve got nothing to hide but the welcome wagon is a whole lot nicer.” Gareth explained, still smiling. “Alex will take you, ask you a few questions.”

His smile faded as he became more serious.

“But first, we need to see everyone’s weapons.” Gareth told them. “If you could just lay them down in front of you.”

Rick turned his head to the others. All of them stared back at him, waiting for his decision.

Rick placed his gun on the floor. “Alright.”

“I’m sure you understand.” Gareth commented.

“Yes I do.” Rick replied, looking up at the man as he placed his knife on the floor next to the gun.

Carl put down his Beretta. Michonne put down her sword. Daryl put down his crossbow and knife. Jason put down his Operator handgun and his blade. They all held their arms out as Alex and Gareth began patting them down, checking for weapons hidden in their pockets, clothes or belts.

“I’d hate to see the other guy.” Alex commented, observing Daryl’s injuries, most notably his black eye.

“You would.” Rick added.

Alex started patting down Carl. “They deserve it?”

“Yes.” Carl answered.

Rick stared over at Carl. His son agreed with what had happened. Perhaps he wasn’t afraid after all.

“Just so you know, we aren’t those kind of people but we aren’t stupid either.” Gareth warned them. “And you shouldn’t be stupid enough to try anything stupid.”

Jason narrowed his eyes. This was all very good. Very welcoming. There had to be a catch.

“As long as everyone’s clear on that we shouldn’t have any problems.” Gareth finished. “Just solutions. Okay.”

Alex held up Michonne’s sword, giving it back to her. Michonne narrowed her eyes. This didn’t feel right.

Daryl picked up his crossbow before Alex could even touch it. Alex handed Carl back his Beretta, Jason his Operator and knife and Rick his knife and gun as well. Rick studied the man. It seemed strange they were returning their weapons so quickly.

“Follow me.” Alex beckoned and led them out of the communications hall.

He opened a door and led them out to the front area. Flowers decorated the area. Picnic tables were set out where people conversed and ate. The smell of cooking meat filling the air courtesy of a barbecue.

“So how long’s this place been here?” Daryl asked their guide.

“Since almost the start.” Alex answered. “When all the camps got overrun, people started finding this place.”

A woman with a gun in the front of her belt tailed behind them.

“I think it was instinct, you know? Follow a path.” Alex continued. “Some folks were heading to the coast, others out west or up north, but they all wound up here.”

Jason looked around. He expected to see more people. Then again, it was a big place.

The woman at the barbecue greeted them. “Hi. Heard you came in the back door. Smart. You’ll fit right in here.”

Alex turned to the woman.

“Hey Mary, would you fix each of these new folks a plate for me?” He asked.

“Why do you do it? Why do you let people in?” Michonne questioned the smiling man.

“The more people become a part of us, we get stronger.” Alex answered, grabbing a plate. “That’s why we put up the signs.”

Rick observed their surroundings. One of the people had a large orange rucksack that looked like the one they owned at the prison. Another man was wearing riot gear, very similar to the riot gear they had at the prison.

“Invite people in. It’s how we survive.”

A woman eating at one of the tables, her hands shaking, wore a poncho that looked identical to the one Daryl used to own at the prison. As Alex handed out the plates to Michonne and Carl, Rick caught sight of the gold metal chain of a pocket watch in Alex’s pocket. Could that be the same one Hershel gave to Glenn? This was no coincidence.

Rick marched forward and knocked the plate out of Alex’s hand, he snatched the watch out of his pocket and wrapped an arm around his neck, pointing his gun to the man’s temple. Daryl aimed at Mary while Carl and Jason aimed at the other people at the picnic tables.

“You freak!” Alex exclaimed in surprise.

Rick studied the watch up close. There was no mistake. It was Hershel’s watch.

“Where the hell did you get this watch?” Rick growled.

 

_Rick walked up to Carl who was standing by a table in the prison cell block. He was cleaning out his Beretta._

_“Hey.” Rick greeted._

_“Hey.” Carl responded, engrossed in putting his gun back together._

_Rick glanced over at Beth as she held and played with baby Judith. A reminder of Hershel’s words._

_“Carl.” Rick tried to get his son’s attention._

_“Yeah?” Carl responded, still fixing up his gun._

_“Carl.” Rick stated again, stronger this time as Carl finished cleaning his gun. “I need your help with something.”_

_Carl loaded his gun and prepared to holster it._

_“Leave it behind.” Rick told him._

_Carl stared up at his father, confused. “What?”_

_Rick placed his holster, with his Colt Python inside, on the table. “It’ll just get in the way.”_

Jason kept his aim on the people ahead of him. They were outnumbered and outgunned again but for the time being Rick had a hostage. The darkest corners of Jason’s mind were working together with his knowledge as a biology student to piece the puzzle together. Freshly cooked meat, stolen items, shaking hands. He feared the conclusion his mind presented him with.

 

_Jason lay back under the covers with Kellin. He stared up at the roof of the tent as Kellin lay his arm lazily over Jason’s chest. Kellin kissed his cheek._

_“It can be like this all the time.” He told Jason with a sigh._

_“Maybe.” Jason answered, turning to him. “But not here.”_

_Kellin looked confused. “Why not?”_

_“We need a place that’s safe. With thick walls, high fences.” Jason explained with a soft smile. “Lots of supplies, plenty of good people. That’s what we need.”_

_“Do you think we can have that?” Kellin asked, resting his head on Jason’s chest._

_“Yeah, we just need to go looking.” Jason answered, stroking Kellin’s hair. “We’ll find a place where we can be safe and happy together.”_

“Where the hell did you get this watch?” Rick growled again.

“You want answers? You want anything else?” Alex responded nervously. “You get them when you put down the gun.”

Rick glanced up at the sniper who had taken aim on the roof above them.

“I see your man on the roof with a sniper rifle.” Rick told him, keeping Alex’s head between him and the sniper. “How good’s his aim? Where’d you get the watch?”

Jason felt sweat trickle down his face. This was going to end in a shootout. He just knew it. Daryl moved his aim from Mary to the people in the main area so that Rick was protected by three weapons.

“Don’t do anything! I have this!” Alex shouted to the sniper. “You just put it down! You put it down!”

The sniper did as he was told and put down his rifle.

“You want to listen to me. There’s a lot of us.” Alex warned.

“Where did you get the watch?” Rick hissed in the man’s ear.

“I got it off of a dead one.” Alex answered nervously. “I didn’t think he’d need it.”

Rick didn’t believe him. “What about the riot gear? The poncho?”

“Got the riot gear off a dead cop.” Gareth answered, his hands out. “Found the poncho on a clothesline.”

“Gareth, we can wait.” Alex pleaded.

“Shut up, Alex.” Gareth spat.

“You talk to me.” Rick hissed at Gareth.

Gareth clasped his hands together. “What’s there left to say? You don’t trust us anymore.”

“Gareth.” Alex pleaded nervously.

“Shut up.” Gareth spat back.

“Gareth, please.” Alex pleaded, terrified.

“It’s okay.” Gareth answered. He had already accepted the violent climax that this standoff was bound to have. “Rick, what do you want?”

“Where are our people?” Rick growled.

“You didn’t answer the question.” Gareth retorted and clenched his fist.

Rick spun around and quickly switched positions with Alex as the sniper fired, the bullet going through the man’s head and sending his body collapsing to the ground. Those who were unarmed ran away as gunfire broke out. Carl and Jason fired back at the other people, forcing them to take cover. Rick fired some shots at the same people.

“Carl!” He yelled over the gunfire. “Get down now!”

Rick led them away in an attempt to run round the corner but someone on the roof shot at them, bullets raining down in front of them. Daryl led them back into the main area, running towards the doors at the far end. Gunshots rained down behind them and then around them, forcing them into the garage.

They ran towards the door at the end of the garage but it was closed before they could reach it, the metal shutter hitting the ground with a loud, echoing thud. Daryl spotted an old iron gate.

“Here!” He called and led them to it but it wouldn’t move.

Rick pointed out a door marked “A” and ran for it with the others following him. They ran back outside into a different alleyway with large boxes, abandoned cars and lots of bullet holes riddling the walls and objects that lay around. Bullets continued to rain down on the ground behind them and to their side. They tried to run straight ahead but a torrent of bullets from an AK74 assaulted the concrete in front of them, forcing the group to take a right turn. Rick fired two shots at the man on the roof with the AK74 before rushing after the others.

The group ran past large cages, the floors of which were littered with human bones and other rotting remains. They ran past a large train cart. Cries for help were calling from inside as they banged on the walls of the cart.

“What the hell?!” Daryl shouted in confusion. People were being contained inside the carts.

“Keep going!” Rick bellowed as they ran through another doorway also marked “A”.

Michonne opened the door and led them into a candle lit room. Candles, belongings, small statues, flowers and other such objects were organised around the room. It was a circular formation with names written around the circle, each set of candles and belongings set next to the names like gravestones.

“What the hell is this place?” Daryl pondered aloud.

“These people, I don’t think they’re trying to kill us.” Michonne pointed out.

“No, they were aiming at our feet.” Rick commented.

On the walls a message was written in large block lettering.

NEVER AGAIN. NEVER TRUST. WE FIRST. ALWAYS.

“I think they want to eat us.” Jason revealed his dark conclusion. “I think they’re cannibals.”

“There!” Rick pointed out a door and rushed for it but someone closed it before he could reach it.

“There!” Daryl pointed out another door marked “A”.

“Go!” Rick bellowed as they ran for the door and made their way through it.

They ran into another storm of bullets that forced them out into the open and back towards the fence that they originally climbed over. As they ran for it several armed people popped up from behind it, their assault rifles aimed at the group. Jason aimed at them out of instinct. Rick looked around. There was no escape. Assault rifles in front and snipers above. They were cornered. Jason slowly lowered his gun, breathing heavily. Outgunned and outnumbered yet again.

Jason backed up towards Carl in an effort to shield him from any gunfire that may come. His rational side told him it wouldn’t make a difference but his instincts moved his body for him.

Rick looked round at Carl’s terrified face, panting from fear and exertion. Michonne, Daryl and Jason all had grim expressions. This truly was the end of the line. They were trapped like the rabbit in Rick’s snare.

“Drop your weapons! Now!” Gareth called from one of the rooftops. “Now!”

They all did as they were told. Daryl dropped his crossbow and knife to the floor. Michonne dropped her sword. Rick dropped his gun and his knife. Carl dropped his Beretta. Jason dropped his Operator and his blade. All of them except for Carl glared up at Gareth.

“And the bag! Drop it!” Gareth shouted to Jason who reluctantly unstrapped his backpack and dropped it to the ground.

“Ringleader! Go to your left!” Gareth commanded. “The train car, go!”

Rick looked to his left at the large train car marked “A”.  He didn’t move.

“You do what we say, the boy goes with you.” Gareth told him. “Anything else, he dies and you end up in there anyway!”

Rick looked into his son’s eyes and then into Jason’s. He had no choice. At least Jason was standing close to Carl in case something happened. Rick made his way over to the train car.

“Now the archer.” Gareth called.

Daryl started walking.

“Now the samurai.” Gareth called out.

Michonne also started walking.

Jason glared up at Gareth. They were powerless. Their lives were in Gareth’s hands.

“Now the aviator.” Gareth ordered.

“It’ll be okay. I promise.” Jason whispered to Carl before making his own way over to the train car. He didn’t believe his own words.

 “Stand at the door, ringleader, archer, samurai, aviator, in that order.” Gareth ordered.

They all did as they were told, all looking over at Carl who was frozen in place with fear. Why wasn’t he being allowed to join them? Were they going to kill him as punishment?

“My son!” Rick demanded loudly.

Carl looked down and closed his eyes. He waited for the gunshot. It didn’t come.

“Go, kid.” Gareth called out.

Carl walked over towards the others. Both Rick and Jason let out a sigh of relief.

“Ringleader, open the door and go in!” Gareth ordered loudly.

“I’ll go in with him!” Rick argued, trying to ensure Carl’s safety.

“Don’t make us kill him now!” Gareth threatened.

Carl walked over to them slowly, his hands down by his sides. Jason kept one foot pivoted on the spot in case he needed to rush towards Carl. Rick growled and walked up the steps and opened the door of the train car. He stepped in as he was told, followed by Daryl, Michonne, Jason and finally Carl.

Rick embraced Carl as he entered the train car while the door closed behind them. They looked at the walls and roof of the car. No way out. It was dark. A dull sound echoed from the other end of the train car. They all turned towards the noise.

“Rick?” A voice questioned.

Out of the darkness came a young Asian man. Behind him were three white women, one black woman, and one black man, a young man with a mullet haircut and a muscular red haired man. Rick recognised most of them instantly, as did Michonne, Carl and Daryl.

Glenn, Maggie, Bob and Sasha were standing in front of them in the train car.

“You’re here.” Rick stated with relief and new found confidence. “You’re hear.”

The other unidentified members of the group stepped forward. Rick looked at them with narrow eyes, not sure what to make of them.

Maggie noticed his suspicion. “They’re our friends. They helped save us.”

“Yeah? Now they’re friends of ours.” Daryl stated much like he had with Jason that morning.

“For however long that’ll be.” The muscular man, Abraham, commented pessimistically.

“No.” Rick countered confidently.

 

_Rick, Carl and Hershel were outside digging up the prison courtyard as Beth came along with Judith in her arms. Carl was struggling to get any purchase with his shovel so Rick walked over to him to help him._

_“Put it in at more of an angle.” He instructed the boy._

_Carl did as he was told and was more successful. The sudden movement and new angle caused his hat to fall off onto the ground. Rick picked it up and dusted it off._

_“Gonna have to get you a farming hat.” Rick joked, placing the hat on Beth’s head. “There’s a new sheriff in town.”_

_They all laughed happily at the silliness of the situation and how much Beth suited Carl’s sheriff hat. Hershel tossed Rick some gloves._

_“It can be like this all the time.” Hershel told him._

_“It’s like this now.” Rick replied, putting on the gloves. “That’s enough.”_

Rick studied everyone in the train car with him and walked over to the door to peer out the gap. He had his friends back. The same people who fought with him through everything from before. People he trusted with his life. They were family. They had new faces with them now. New friends. They all had the same connection and same goal.

“They’re gonna feel pretty stupid when they find out.” Rick declared confidently.

“Find out what?” Abraham asked him.

Everyone looked at Rick. They were trapped in a train car. They were outnumbered and outgunned by an entire army of cannibals. There wasn’t much hope to be had yet Rick was surprisingly firm and confident. Rick turned to them all.

“They’re fucking with the wrong people!”

 

**Longest chapter yet! Longer than I had intended but I wanted to get all of this stuff in one chapter because the next one will probably be just as long. The Terminus escape should have a different twist to it now that Jason is in the mix and is willing to kill to protect the people he considers to be family.**

**Thanks for all the Kudos/favourites/follows/bookmarks/subscriptions etc.**

**Thanks to my reviewers of chapter 7: rk0192, vmbaby, AmbroseViolence & yheagrl. Sorry for making you cry at the end of chapter 7. **

**As per, leave a review and let me know what you think. Terminus doesn’t know what they are in for!**

 


	9. No Sanctuary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group attempt to escape from Terminus with some unexpected help. However, their escape will come at a price.

“They’re fucking with the wrong people!”

That had been Rick’s confident declaration upon realising that the surviving members of his group were in the train car with him. Jason didn’t know who these people were but if they were anything like Rick then they had a fighting chance of escaping. A chance, Jason reminded himself. They didn’t have their weapons and they were locked up in a train car surrounded by armed men. Any escape would require a lot of luck for it to work but it looked like Rick was determined enough to make it happen.

As the light in the sky had faded to give way to the night time darkness, everyone in the group had been thoroughly introduced. Jason observed them as he leaned against one of the walls of the train car. The black couple were Bob and Sasha, they had lived in the prison with Rick and the others before the Governor attacked it with a tank. The Asian man, Glenn, had been with Rick since the very beginning and was married to the attractive young woman, Maggie. Jason had found out from Carl that Maggie was the eldest daughter of Hershel. The girl who appeared to be around the same age as Jason was Tara. Glenn had explained that she had saved his life on his way to Terminus. She didn’t look very capable in Jason’s eyes but looks could be deceiving. The other young woman was Rosita, she appeared to be the team medic of her little group. The larger man with the mullet was Eugene, he was a scientist who knew how to stop the walker infection. Jason couldn’t believe his ears when he had been told that. Eugene had to be taken to Washington DC for that to happen and that was the mission of Rosita and Abraham. Abraham, the muscular, red haired man with the handle bar moustache was a sergeant in the army and appeared to be very rough around the edges.

Jason came out of his thoughts to listen in on the conversation taking place in front of him. Abraham was explaining to Rick what had happened when they reached Terminus. He had arrived with Eugene, Rosita, Glenn, Maggie, Bob and Sasha.

“They seemed nice enough but I was ready to go. I know we just got here but damn, it was time to go.” Abraham explained. “When I told them about DC, wink and a nod from the head asshole in charge and they pulled the guns out and we were right back to our regularly scheduled shitstorm.”

“Did you fight back?” Rick asked flatly.

“Would have but I couldn’t risk Eugene’s safety.” Abraham answered. “We had no choice but to surrender.”

Rick nodded, accepting the answer.

Sasha and Michonne appeared to be talking on the other end of the train car.

“Before they put you in here, you didn’t see Tyreese?” Sasha asked. Tyreese was her older brother who was also missing since the prison attack.

“No.” Michonne answered, shaking her head.

Sasha let out a weak smile. “Good.”

Maggie approached Rick and Daryl. “What about Beth? Is she…?”

Daryl shook his head. “No, she’s alive.”

“Where is she?” Maggie asked, confused.

“She’s gone. Taken.” Daryl answered. “Black car with a white cross painted on it. I tried to follow it. I tried.”

“But she’s alive?” Maggie confirmed, taking in the information that her younger sister had been kidnapped.

“She’s alive.” Daryl confirmed for her.

Once the individual conversations had died down Jason decided to ask the all-important question.

“So, what’s the plan?” He asked Rick, who had an air of confidence about him.

They all turned to face Rick, staring at the man intently looking for an answer. He was the most confident one there so he must have a plan that would allow him to be that confident. It made a difference that they all knew each other as the people of Terminus could never have predicted that to happen.

“We use what we have to make weapons.” Rick told them. “There’s wood in here, we can break it and sharpen it. Make blades.”

The all looked around and it was true. There was plenty of wood that could be sharpened to a point and used to stab or slash.

“When they come in to get us, we kill them and take their weapons.” Rick told them. “We fight our way out.”

“I’m not comfortable with leading Eugene into a hailstorm of bullets.” Abraham argued. “His safety is top priority.”

“If you stay here he will die.” Rick countered. “At least with my way he has a chance of surviving. We all do.”

Rick looked around at them. “Use what you have and make weapons. We have till morning.”

“We should all try to get some sleep too.” Glenn added. “We’re going to need the energy.”

Rick nodded, accepting the addition to the plan before looking through the gaps in the wall out at Terminus. Jason observed as Rick went between the gaps in the wall, pacing up and down the train car as he methodically started studying the movements of the people outside. Jason yawned as he watched him pacing and remembered that apart from Carl, none of them had slept because of the attack from Joe and his group. Rick was full of energy and adrenaline but he needed to be strong when they attempted their escape. Jason approached him.

“Rick?” He asked, lowering his voice so as to not wake some of the others who were now sleeping.

“Yeah?” Rick answered, still looking out the gaps.

“You should get some sleep.” Jason told the man, earning him a quick glare. “You need to be strong in the morning.”

“I’m fine.” Rick answered. “You sleep.”

Jason didn’t want to annoy the man but he knew he was in the right this time so he put his foot down.

“I will.” Jason answered. “But you first. We’re all going to need you.”

Rick stared at him. The young man obviously wasn’t going to leave him be. He knew he hadn’t slept but he felt a responsibility to study the night time routine of the people in Terminus. Rick hoped it would help them in the morning though it was also true that he would need to be fully awake and ready. Finally, he nodded.

“I’ll wake you in a couple hours.” Jason told him and looked out the gap himself, taking over from Rick.

“Thanks.” Rick answered and wandered to the back of the train car to lie down.

Jason looked out one of the gaps. He could see some of the Terminus group patrolling the rooftops, probably as a vantage point so they could spot anyone or anything coming their way at night. They would need a miracle to get out of this place alive. Jason admitted that Rick was right, it was better to try than to give up. Somebody approached him from out of the darkness and stood beside him, their distinct sheriff’s hat a dead giveaway to their identity.

“Hey Carl.” Jason greeted, his voice low.

“Can I ask you something?” Carl asked, skipping any greeting.

“Sure.” Jason answered, turning his attention to the teen.

“Why are you so calm?” Carl asked, his eyes narrowed.

“What do you mean?” Jason asked. He knew what Carl meant.

“Well, you don’t look nervous, or scared.” Carl answered. “Everyone else does.”

“I am though.” Jason replied. “I just don’t show it.”

“Why not?” Carl asked. Jason sighed, this was another interrogation.

“I often hide my feelings from people.” Jason told the teen. “I don’t always tell people what I think or feel.”

“Well, why not?” Carl continued.

“It depends. Sometimes it’s not the best time.” Jason explained. “Other times it can be a distraction or a mistake.”

“So why’s now not the best time?” Carl asked. They were all afraid. What harm was there in admitting that?

Jason sighed and smiled softly. Carl was too pure for his own good sometimes.

“Because we need to keep the group strong, confident even.” Jason explained. “Make sure they fight as hard as they can to get out of here.”

Carl nodded and thought for a moment. “Does this mean there are things you haven’t told me?”

Jason cocked his head to the side like a confused puppy. “What sort of things?”

Carl hesitated. He was thankful it was so dark in the train car.

“You know, thoughts on things… feelings?” Carl asked, completely unsure on how to word his question without sounding weird.

Jason stayed silent for a moment. He was trying to make sense of Carl’s questions. Was he asking what he thought he was asking? He could ask to find out but that would get awkward fast if he was wrong. Jason then remembered another important detail. _Rick was a few feet away_. He couldn’t risk saying or doing the wrong thing. Last thing he needed was Rick tearing him apart.

“No. I don’t hide things from you.” Jason answered finally with a forced smile.

Carl’s face fell as he looked down at the floor of the train car. He had probably just said something very stupid to Jason. The pause that Jason took to answer told him that. Either he was lying to Carl now or he had been stunned by the question. It was hard to read Jason at the best of times let alone in almost total darkness.

“Are we really going to get out of here?” Carl asked, not looking up.

Jason placed both his hands on Carl’s shoulders and rubbed them softly. Carl looked up at him as their eyes met.

“Hey, we’re going to get out of this just fine.” Jason told the teen with a reassuring smile. “Have faith in your dad and your friends here.”

Carl nodded and smiled weakly. He didn’t believe Jason but there wasn’t much else he could do but hope.

“Get some sleep.” Jason told the boy. “In the morning we’ll make our weapons and fight back.”

Carl nodded and did as he was told. He retreated to the far end of the train car where Michonne was as Jason continued looking out the gaps. From the darkness, Rick observed their exchange before allowing himself a couple hours of rest.

_Jason could hear shouting from the other street. Violent, aggressive shouting. He was on his way to meet up with Kellin for a day out, the plan was to go to the cinema and then to the lake. It was a nice day too, sunny but not too warm. Birds would normally be chirping in the trees above him but the violent shouts had scared them all off. As he drew closer to the street he could make out what the voices were shouting._

_“Fucking faggot!”_

_“Get up! Need you on your knees to suck my dick!”_

_Even the laughter was violent to Jason’s ears. There were small gangs of older teens who would go round the area picking fights. They were xenophobia with legs as far as Jason was concerned. A gay guy was obviously their target today. Fortunately for Jason, his bisexuality was largely a secret so these gangs would often pass him by without incident._

_Jason rounded the corner and felt the breath leave his lungs. There were three of the xenophobic youths and they were standing over a crumpled figure on the floor. Jason recognised the figure, the blue skinny jeans and blonde hair a dead giveaway. They were attacking Kellin. Kellin attempted to stand but was kicked into submission by one of the gang. He cried out in pain, tears rushing down his face to join the blood trickling from his nose._

_Jason felt his fists clench and rational thought leave him completely. He didn’t need to think. He didn’t need to consider consequences. His boyfriend was being beaten by a gang of rabid dogs. Dangerous dogs get put down. There were three of them and one of him. He didn’t care. He didn’t need to. It didn’t matter._

_Jason took out his keys and placed them in between his fingers, clenching the key ring in his fist. In his other fist he grabbed all his spare change and rushed towards the group. The first youth to turn around received a strong punch to the temple, the density of the coins in Jason’s fist reinforcing the blow. The youth collapsed to the floor as he suddenly lost consciousness. The other two had spun around to see what was happening but neither had much time to react. The closest youth to Jason received his next punch, which was aimed for the jaw and connected with so much force that they keys in between Jason’s fingers pierced through the youth’s cheek and into his mouth. The boy dropped to the floor, clutching his face as he howled in pain, blood pouring from the three stab wounds to his face. Jason dropped the blooded keys to the floor and towered over the third and final youth, the one who had been beating Kellin. They were of equal height but Jason’s violent entrance made him into a tower. He could feel the fear rushing through the youth. The terror in his eyes told Jason everything. The boy was nothing more than a coward. A bully. Like the ones that had ruined his own childhood._

_Jason growled and swung a punch at the final youth with enough force to knock him off his feet. He jumped onto the youth, his knees on the boy’s chest as he angrily slammed punch after punch into the boy’s face. How dare he hurt Kellin. How dare he ruin their day. How dare he. The youth had fallen unconscious from the trauma of the punches, his face swollen and bleeding but Jason continued to punch him. His arms were numb. His fists were bleeding, his knuckles split open but he didn’t feel it. He didn’t care. This was punishment. He was going to put this rabid dog down. Somewhere through the fog of fury that had clouded his mind he could hear someone calling his name. Jason could swear that someone was trying to stop him. Someone was trying to grab his arms. Call his name. Pleading with him to stop. Why would anyone want to save this filth beneath him?_

_Suddenly a pair of arms were wrapped around his body and were pulling him off the beaten and blooded youth. Once he was off the boy and had stopped swinging his arms he could feel the arms around him squeeze him tightly. A face was resting on his back. Kellin._

_“Jason, stop. Stop.” Kellin repeated in his ear. “Come back to me.”_

_Jason realised he had let his rage take over. No thought had gone into it and as a result he had completely forgotten to even check on Kellin. He looked at the damage he had caused. One youth unconscious on the floor. The other lying on the floor, clutching his bleeding face. The third and final youth lay back on the floor, his face beaten into a blooded mess, his rising and falling chest the only sign that he was still alive. Jason felt his legs shake as they gave way and he slumped to the ground, his descent slowed by Kellin holding onto him._

_“Jason.” Kellin called softly into his ear. “Talk to me, pumpkin.”_

_Jason felt his hands shaking as he raised one to his forehead, closing his eyes as guilt and regret fired through him. He had almost killed these three teenagers because they gave Kellin a bloody nose and had made him cry. Was that justified? Jason felt like he had totally overreacted. He’d be lucky if he didn’t end up in jail._

_The arms around him squeezed again as a soft kiss was placed to the back of his neck. Kellin was still trying to get through to him. Jason wanted to answer but he couldn’t find the words._

_“Jason, baby, please.” Kellin continued softly, his tone laced with worry. “Jason.”_

“Jason. Jason!” A voice called out, waking him from his thoughts. “Get up, come on.”

Jason opened his eyes and took in his surroundings. Metal. Wood. Darkness. The sound of people talking. The sound of wood being splintered. Carl was in front of him, still leaning over him after having shaken him awake. They were trapped in Terminus. Jason nodded and looked around for his bag. It wasn’t there. That’s when it came back to him, the Terminus group had his bag. _Bastards_.

Jason looked around to see all of the others hard at work creating wooden weapons. Others were using parts of their clothing, such as belts and belt buckles to make sharpened weapons they could wrap round their hands or put in between their fingers. Rick was using Hershel’s pocket watch to shave off some wood and carve it into a sharpened point. Michonne was using her belt to strap two long wooden stakes to both ends of her scabbard. Abraham had managed to insert a wooden stake into the middle of one of his fingerless gloves. He was impressed by the creativity of the group.

Carl was trying to carve some wood into a sharpened point with another bit of wood but was struggling. Jason sat down beside him and took it from the young teen. He started carving it for Carl, making more progress because he was physically stronger. Carl didn’t look too pleased at having yet another thing be done for him, which Jason noticed.

“Some things require brute force.” Jason told him with a low voice. “And we don’t have time to spare.”

He finished carving it into a sharp point and handed it back to the boy with a soft smile. Jason could tell that Carl was wondering why he wasn’t making anything for himself but he wasn’t prepared to have that discussion. Before Carl could speak, Jason made his way over to Rick.

“Rick, can we talk for a second?” Jason asked, having waited until the former cop had finished sharpening his wooden stake.

“Make it quick.” Rick answered, turning to him.

“I didn’t mention it last night but I managed to slip in a couple things.” Jason told the group leader. “I trust you to have one of them.”

Rick narrowed his eyes with curiosity but also with a silent command for Jason to hurry up.

Jason sat down on the floor of the train car and took off one of his boots. He reached inside it and pulled at something. Rick could hear the sound of tape being ripped off before Jason’s hand revealed itself once again. In the young man’s hand, one side covered in tape, was a switchblade. Jason pulled the tape off and handed it to Rick.

“They never checked our shoes.” Jason told him with a confident smile. “Best keep it hidden until you really need it.”

Rick nodded, his eyebrows raised in surprise and appreciation for the slightly strange but undoubtedly helpful forward thinking of the young man.

“Thank you.” He answered and slipped the switchblade into his sock.

Jason put his boot back on before removing the other one to retrieve the second switchblade. He too placed it inside his sock and covered it over with his cargos. He put the other boot back on and picked up some small wooden strips from the floor. They weren’t particularly sharp but they could fit in between his fingers to add extra damage to his punches. If in doubt he had the blade as a backup.

Daryl had been keeping watch the whole time, the light streaming in from the gap in the wall illuminating his face.

“Alright!” He called to the group. “Got four of them pricks coming our way!”

Rick grabbed his wooden stake and headed for the door with everyone else.

“You all know what to do.” He told them. “Go for their eyes first, then their throats!”

They all stood poised at the door like big cats preparing to pounce. All the various wooden and metal stakes and makeshift daggers were raised and ready. The atmosphere was thick and everyone was tense. This was their only chance.

“Put your backs to the walls on either end of the car.” A voice called out. “ _Now!_ ”

Rick glanced back towards Carl. His son was protecting the defenceless scientist, Eugene, while Jason stood slightly to the side but in front of Carl. Anything or anyone that came through the door would have to go through Rick, then Jason before it could get to Carl. Everyone held their positions. They could hear the men approaching the door. They held their breath and prepared to attack.

Suddenly the roof opened up with harsh sunlight streaming in. They looked up in surprise, not having expected an approach from above. A grenade dropped into the train car from the roof, landing on the floor in the centre of their group. The military sergeant, Abraham, knew what it was and instantly called out.

“Move!” He spun away from the grenade and tried to force those closest to him to do the same.

The grenade went off, the sound of the explosion echoing inside the walls of the metal train car making everyone’s ears ring violently loud. They were disorientated and dizzy from the sharp and sudden noise. They were further disorientated by the smoke that filled the train car, causing them to cough and wave their arms in an attempt to restore their field of vision but their eyes were watering too much from the dense smoke. They could hear the door of the train car open as men with gas masks stepped inside.

There was a scramble in the smoke as the men chose their victims and grabbed members from the group. They pulled them to the door and through them off the edge so they would crash down on the cement to further daze them. Rick looked around, knowing his wooden stake had been dropped when the grenade went off. A gas mask dropped in front of him as a man with a walkie-talkie stood over him. Upon noticing Rick looking up at him he kicked Rick in the head to knock him out. The door of the train car slammed shut yet again.  

 

Rick quickly regained consciousness. He could hear grinding accompanied by the sound of something soft and juicy being sliced up. The two sounds repeated over and over as he was hauled into a large room by two men. He opened his eyes and took in the source of the sounds. Two men were standing over a table and were using a grinder to slice up a naked human body. Jason had been right. They were cannibals.

Rick was forced down onto his knees in front of a stainless steel trough. He tried to move but the men had too firm a hold on him and quickly bound his wrists together with plastic zip ties. They did the same with his ankles and forced a gag into his mouth, tying it at the back of his neck. They finally let him go. Rick looked to his left as Daryl was brought in, bravely trying to resist the men but ultimately achieving nothing. Bob was put to Rick’s right. Glenn was forced to Daryl’s left and then Jason was forced to kneel to the left of Glenn. Four other men were already there, bound and gagged.

Rick looked at the young man at the opposite end of the trough. The blonde hair gave him away instantly. It was the young man, Sam, who he had met when he had gone out on a run with Carol who he later banished from the prison. He was here too and he was terrified. Rick felt sorry for the man but knew he couldn’t do anything to save him right away.

Rick turned his head to observe the apron-clad men in the room with them. One was a bald man who was taking practice swings with a metal baseball bat and the other was a young man with a baseball cap who was sharpening a large knife. Rick looked away as the two men made their way over to the far end of the trough where the young man, Sam, was kneeling.

Jason and the others watched on in terror as the bald man swung the baseball bat and struck Sam in the back of the head. Sam instantly slumped forward, either unconscious or dead, before the other man lifted his head and quickly slit his throat. The blood sprayed from the young man’s jugular and poured into the trough. The men closest to him started screaming in terror as they tried to break the plastic binds that held their hands and feet together.

The bald man swung again and struck the next man down in the same way. Yet again the second man slit their throat and let them bleed out into the trough. The screams from the other men intensified and Jason realised he’d soon be in line to receive the same treatment. He carefully slipped his fingers into his sock and pulled out the switchblade. He concealed it up his jacket sleeve and started slowly cutting at the plastic zip ties that bound his wrists.

The third man in the line received the baseball bat to the back of his head before having his throat cut open like the others. Jason started panicking as the plastic was proving to be tougher to cut through than he had expected. He couldn’t hurry otherwise the men would notice but if he continued at his current pace he would be dead before he could cut through it.

By this point the blood had reached Rick’s end of the trough and pooled at the drain as it started to slip down into it. Rick did the same as Jason and pulled out the switchblade slowly and carefully before starting to cut at the plastic. As he did so, Gareth walked into the room with a large notebook.

“Hey guys, what were your shot counts?” He asked the men.

“Thirty-eight!” The bald man answered.

He swung again, striking the man next to Jason before the man with the knife cut his throat open too. The blood drummed on the steel trough as it spurted and splattered out of the dead man’s jugular at high pressure. Jason tried to cut faster without being obvious. He was next and he hadn’t cut through the plastic yet. He would need to move but it would just get him killed anyway. Gareth had a gun and the men behind him had a baseball bat and a blade. With his wrists and ankles bound, he wouldn’t be able to defend himself either. Jason felt the sweat slide down his face. This was it then. This was where he would die. He regretted not spending more time with Carl. He regretted lying to Carl the night before. He regretted having let Rick and the other down. Jason closed his eyes and waited for the baseball bat to hit him. The bald man stood behind Jason and raised his arms back. His swing was ready. He swung at Jason’s head.

“Hey!” Gareth called out.

The bald man stopped mid-swing. Jason opened his eyes.

Gareth gestured to the other man. “Your shot count?”

The man’s face was warped with guilt. He was also afraid of the authority that Gareth appeared to have. He shook his head and body nervously.

“Crap man, I’m sorry.” He confessed. He didn’t know his shot count. “It was my first round-up.”

“After you’re done here go back to your point and count the shells.” Gareth told him, disappointed in the man’s lack of efficiency. “Kayleigh won’t be gathering them until tomorrow.”

Gareth returned to writing things down in his notebook.

“Hey!” Bob called out through his gag. “I want to talk to you!”

Gareth pointed at the remaining men lined up at the trough. “Five from A, four from D.”

The man with the baseball bat nodded. “Yeah.”

Gareth made a note of it in his book.

“Hey you! I’m talking to you!” Bob continued to garble from under the gag.

Gareth lowered the gag. “What?”

“Don’t do this. We can fix this.” Bob pleaded.

“No, you can’t.” Gareth answered and reached for the gag again.

“You don’t have to do this! We told you there’s a way out of all of this.” Bob shouted. “You just have to take a chance. We have a man who knows how to stop it. He has a cure. We just need to get him to Washington.”

Gareth continued to write in his notebook, showing no interest whatsoever. Rick and Jason were using this opportunity to cut at their binds more.

“You don’t have to do this, man.” Bob told the man towering over him. “We can put the world back to how it was.”

“Can’t go back, Bob.” Gareth answered and placed the gag back in Bob’s mouth.

Gareth closed his book and placed it on the floor as he crouched in front of Rick. He pulled off Rick’s gag with both hands. Rick glared at him maliciously.

“Saw you go into the woods with a bag and come out without it.” Gareth stated calmly. “Have to pull my spotters back before we go look for it. What was in it?”

Rick remained silent, glaring at the younger man in front of him, as did Daryl and Jason.

“You hid it, right? In case things went bad?” Gareth continued. “ _Smart_. Still, we’ll find it but it’s too dangerous to go out there right now.”

Gareth pulled out a long dagger and grabbed Bob by the back of the head, pulling him forward so the dagger was level with the black man’s eye. Gareth looked back at Rick.

“What was in it? I’m curious.” He questioned. “And it was a _big_ bag.”

Rick continued to glare at him in malevolent silence.

“You really gonna let me do this?” Gareth asked him, casting his eyes to Bob.

Rick thought for a moment. He just needed enough time to cut the plastic round his wrists. He was half-way there.

“Let me take you out there.” Rick answered. “I’ll show you.”

“Not gonna happen.” Gareth shook his head, smiling. He brought the blade closer to Bob’s eye. “This might.”

“There’s guns in it. AK-47, .44 Magnum, automatic weapons, night scope, there’s a compound bow and a machete with a red handle.” Rick explained, glaring confidently. “ _That’s what I’m gonna to use to kill you_.”

Gareth smiled, amused at Rick’s statement. None of them were going to be leaving alive. All five of them were going to be executed just like the four that already hung over the trough. He sheathed his dagger and put Rick’s gag back in his mouth.

“Thanks.” Gareth answered, patting his shoulders.

As Gareth stood up Jason started laughing through his gag. His laugh only increased in strength as his whole body shook with it. The movements and volume brought attention to him but also allowed him to cut the plastic faster now that his whole body was moving. Gareth sighed and pulled the gag off him.

“Was there a joke we didn’t hear?” Gareth asked him, glaring.

Jason calmed his laughter and nodded. “You’re going to eat us, right? As much of us as you can?”

Gareth smiled, his expression losing its earlier aggression.

“You’re either the butcher or the cattle.” He answered. “That’s how it works nowadays.”

Jason laughed some more. He had almost cut through the binds.

“Then you’re all fucked. Totally fucked!” Jason declared with a grin, barely containing his laughter. “Karma’s gonna be a total bitch to you guys!”

“And why’s that, Jason?” Gareth answered. He was bored and not impressed with the attitude being displayed by the younger man.

“Kuru disease. Only contracted through cannibalism.” Jason answered with a malicious grin. “Kills you within a year.”

Gareth smiled with amusement. He could tell Jason had some knowledge of biology but what the younger man was unaware of was that Gareth did too. He also knew that Kuru disease was only possible if they ate human brains. Terminus didn’t eat brains, only the body for that specific reason. He placed the gag back in Jason’s mouth and addressed the two executioners behind them.

“You have two hours to get them on the driers then we go back to public face.” Gareth told them. “I know now’s the time that gets messy but we need to dial it all in by sundown.”

“Got it.” The cap wearing man answered.

“Yes sir.” Replied the bald man.

Jason smirked under the gag. His wrists were free and he was now working on his ankles, still keeping his hands together to avoid suspicion. He could defend himself now. Jason assumed Rick would be much the same at this point.

Suddenly two gunshots echoed from outside. The sound was similar to that of a high powered rifle. Gareth took out his walkie-talkie.

“Hey, Chuck?” He asked but received only static.

Another sound rang out, similar to a firework blasting off from the ground. Suddenly they were knocked off balance by a massive explosion that shook the building. Those who had been standing were almost knocked over by the shockwave while Rick and the others had been knocked over completely.

As they were now lying on their backs, Jason and Rick had the perfect opportunity to finish cutting their binds. The other men stood back up. The walkie-talkie was filled with panic and confusion on the radio channel.

“You stay here.” Gareth said to the two executioners.

“These guys aren’t going anywhere.” The bald man retorted.

“Stay here until I know what’s happening!” Gareth bellowed back and ran out of the room.

“So we just sit here?” The blade wielder asked in confusion.

Rick and Jason had just about cut through the last of their plastic binds.

“We’ve got a job to do.” The bald man answered with a shrug.

The man with the blade picked up his walkie-talkie. “You there, Gareth?”

“He’s busy.” The bald man told him.

“You smell the smoke? You hear the shots? He could be dead!” The man shouted back. “The hell we doing here? The whole place could be going up!”

The bald man walked up to the other.

“He went on one round up and blew protocol. We don’t deal with security, that ain’t our job, this is.” The bald man told him.

The other man stormed over to the table, muttering and cursing his workmate under his breath.

“Hey! Look at me!” The bald man called to him.

“What?” The other turned around.

Jason sprang up from behind the bald man, arms and legs free and his switchblade in his hand. He thrust it into the back of the man’s neck and knocked him to the ground, stabbing him repeatedly in the neck and back until he lay in a pool of blood. Rick charged forward towards the other man, pushing him against the table as he tried to beg for his life before thrusting the switchblade into his throat and then his stomach.  Rick let the man fall to the ground and turned to Jason who had stopped his attack as well.

Rick glanced at the table with the naked body on it and recognised it as Alex, their Terminus guide until the sniper accidentally shot him. He returned to the others as Jason had just cut Daryl free. They had to move fast.

 

The smell of rotting flesh filled the train car as the sounds of gunfire and screams echoed around them. From inside the train car there was no way of knowing what was happening as vision was extremely restricted by the gaps in the walls.

Abraham slammed his fists against the door. “What the hell is going on?”

“Someone hit them.” Rosita deduced quickly.

“Maybe our people got free.” Sasha suggested, trying to make sense of it.

“Excuse me.” Eugene said as he barged between Sasha and Tara to crouch down by the door. He had a couple bits of metal from the grenade that had gone off earlier and started wedging them into the door.

“What the hell are you doing?” Rosita asked him in confusion.

“I might be able to use this shell to compromise the door.” Eugene answered. “From the sound of things there might not be anybody left to open it.”

Tara sighed in exasperation. “Eugene, I’m sorry but shut up.”

“Okay.” Eugene replied timidly and continued fiddling with the door frame.

Carl could hear the doubt in the voices of the new group members. They assumed that all hell was breaking loose outside and that Daryl, Glenn, Bob, Jason and his dad were all dead. He knew that couldn’t be possible. He didn’t even dare consider that possibility. Rosita was probably right. Someone was attacking them and they needed to be ready for any opportunities.

“Hey! My dad’s going to be back.” Carl told them confidently. “They all are.”

Maggie stood beside him. She had been with the group for over a year and she knew that Rick, Daryl and her husband, Glenn, were very tough and very resourceful.

“They are and we need to be ready to fight our way out when they do.” She told them.

The others accepted the confidence shown by Carl and Maggie and returned to crafting new weapons to use should they escape. Looking out the gaps, Michonne couldn’t help but smirk. Walkers were everywhere which meant Terminus was in a serious condition.

 

“They got problems, we’ve got a chance.” Rick told them once they were all free.

“Sounded like a bomb!” Glenn commented.

“Sounds like a damn war!” Daryl commented, the gunshots echoing all around them.

They started grabbing weapons from the table. Rick took a large knife while Jason took a machete. Daryl grabbed a knife as well while Glenn took the baseball bat. Bob also took a large knife.

“What the hell are these people?” Bob asked aloud in shock.

“They ain’t people.” Daryl answered.

Bob grabbed a large pipe and prepared himself to stab the dead men in the head to prevent reanimation but Rick stopped him.

“Don’t.” Rick told him. “Let them turn.”

The five men entered the next room which had human body parts in large trays, a variety of cutting tools and weapons along with skinned human torsos hanging from the ceiling from hooks. It was just like a butcher’s meat locker. They had been doing this to a lot of people over many months. That was becoming clear to the group.

“Cross any of these people you kill them.” Rick told the others. “Don’t hesitate. _They won’t_.”

Daryl broke a pipe off one of the machines so he could duel wield it along with the large knife he already had. They made their way to the door and looked through the window. A small group of walkers were clawing at the walls of one of the containers, shouts and screams echoing from inside. There was a clear path past the container because the walkers were all focused on the container.

“If we run we can get by them.” Rick told them. “They’re distracted.”

“We’ve got to let those people out.” Glenn stated.

Rick glared at him. They didn’t have time for that. The people inside could be dangerous or could be a liability. The important thing was rescuing their own people and getting out of Terminus before the walker population became too dense or the place burned to the ground.

“That’s still who we are.” Glenn glared back. “It’s gotta be.”

Rick glared as he thought about it. Glenn was right. Leaving the people in the containers would make them no better than the people who put them in there in the first place. He nodded and opened the door.

They all spread out and rushed towards the walkers who had turned their attention towards the advancing men. Rick stabbed one in the head, Glenn smacked another with the bat, Bob decapitated one, Daryl stabbed another in the head and Jason split the last walker’s head in two with his machete. Glenn quickly opened the door releasing the man inside.

The man had dirty clothes, tattoos and long brown hair. He screamed and shouted as he ran out of the container, grabbing Glenn by the shoulders.

“We’re the same!” He shouted.

Glenn pushed him off so he latched onto Rick.

“We’re the same!” He laughed. This man was completely divorced from reality.

“Back off!” Rick growled, pushing him back.

The man continued to laugh, completely crazed from his confinement and too far detached from reality to notice the walker come up from his left. The walker, once a woman, pounced on him and bit into his shoulder as they both fell to the ground. Glenn rushed forward to kill the walker with the baseball bat but he was too focused on that to hear the chorus of walker moans and snarls coming towards them. Daryl grabbed him by the scruff of the neck and pinned him against the container wall just as the large walker group came into view.

There were walkers on one side of the street and a group of armed people on the other side. There was no way through. Bob looked back at the door they came from which was still clear of any dangers or obstacles.

“We should double back.” He suggested.

“No, if we go back we don’t know where we are.” Rick retorted.

“We don’t really have a choice, do we?” Daryl asked, observing the situation.

The gunshots that sounded around them got louder. The walkers at the front of the group dropped to the ground as the bullets blew their brains out. The armed group were marching down the street towards the advancing walkers, shooting and killing them as they went with assault rifles. If they were to make any progress they needed guns. An idea came to Rick’s mind.

“Just wait here.” He told the others, clutching his knife and rushing off, the others trying to stop him.

Rick ran over to the abandoned police car that lay in the street and crouched behind it. He was dangerously close to the battle between the people of Terminus and the advancing herd of undead. Rick used the broken wing mirror of the police car which lay on the ground to observe the advancing group. The mix of men and women marched forward, firing their assault rifles at the undead without losing their pace.

Suddenly Rick heard a snarl behind him and turned to see the face of a walker, mouth open, teeth bared as it prepared to bite him. Before Rick could react, the walker’s face exploded as Daryl’s pipe was smashed through it, having been thrust through the skull from behind. The body dropped silently to the ground. Both men shared a nod and looked back to the armed group. The advancing armed group were too focused on the undead to notice the men crouched behind the police car. Five people marched past, firing their weapons. A few feet behind was the last member of the group, an older man. Rick made his move.

Rick quietly rushed up to the man and stabbed him in the neck. The man cried out but his scream was muffled by his gun firing along with the noise of other gunshots and the undead snarls. Rick let the man fall to the floor as he bled out and took the Narinco Type 56 assault rifle from the man. He quickly aimed and fired into the backs of the other five armed Terminus members, taking special care not to kill them so they would be left for the walkers. Rick heard a gun click and spun around in time to see another man aim a Beretta back at him. Before he could pull the trigger, Jason’s machete sliced into the man’s shoulder, causing him to howl out in agony and shock. Jason continued to hack into the man until he stopped moving. He looked up from the gory mess and gave Rick a nod.

Rick checked to make sure no one else was aiming at them before picking up the last man’s Beretta off the ground. As the five other people screamed in pain and terror as the walkers devoured them, Rick, Jason and Daryl headed back to the container where Glenn and Bob were waiting.

“We don’t have to double back.” Rick told them, handing the Beretta to Bob.

 

Outside the train car, the horde of undead was growing in number with one particular walker clawing at the door. Inside, Michonne was reinforcing her new weapon as were the others. Eugene continued to tinker with the shell at the base of the door. Carl sat next to Michonne, having not left her side much since his dad and Jason were taken.

“I hope they’re okay.” Carl whispered to her, so the rest of the group wouldn’t hear his doubt.

Michonne narrowed her eyes and tilted her head. “They are.”

Carl didn’t look up from the stake he was carving. Michonne grabbed his shoulder gently.

“They _are_.” She stressed.

Carl didn’t talk about it but his mind continued to cast itself back to the previous night. Asking Jason about how often and why he conceals his feelings had been a revelation to Carl. He couldn’t shake the feeling that Jason had lied to him and the idea that he had sent Carl’s mind into a torrent of thoughts. All the different possible explanations for why he would lie in that moment. Did he care more than he let on? Did he care less than he appeared to? Was he protecting Carl from some dark secret or was he simply afraid of the truth? Carl silently prayed that they would all be reunited so he could confront Jason about it.

“What’s the cure, Eugene?” Sasha asked out of the blue, staring at the man.

“It’s classified.” Eugene answered without looking up from what he was doing.

“We don’t know what’s gonna happen.” Michonne commented.

The world they knew was gone. No signs of there being any authority, any government and they were currently locked in a train car by armed cannibals whose home was being swarmed by walkers. The idea of top government secrets was outdated.

“You leave him be.” Abraham defended. As a soldier he still had respect for the chain of command.

“We need to keep working.” Maggie told them, knowing that every second was crucial for their chances of escape.

“Yeah but it’s time to hear it.” Sasha countered, glaring at Eugene. She needed to know why so many people had died and how to put it right. “’cause we don’t know what’s coming next.”

“What’s next is that we get out of this.” Tara answered her with confidence.

“Even if I told you all, even if I provided step by step instructions, complete with illustrations and a well composed FAQ on how went red ring.” Eugene answered them. “The cure would still die with me.”

“I’m not gonna let that happen.” Abraham replied, looking up from the stake inserted in his glove.

“The best case scenario we step out into a hell-storm of bullets, fire and walkers.” Eugene continued. “I’m not fleet of foot and I sure as hell can’t take a dead one down with sharp buttons and hella confidence.”

“Yeah but we can and we will.” Michonne answered him, observing him as he turned his attention back to the door.

Sasha stood up. “You don’t owe us anything. Not yet. But we just wanna hear it.”

“You don’t have to.” Rosita interrupted. They were wasting time.

Eugene stared back at Sasha, it was clear that she wasn’t going to stop asking about the cure so he would have to say something. He didn’t want to. It went against protocol. He stood up and turned his back to the door.

“I was part of a ten person team at the Human Genome Project for weaponised diseases defied weaponised diseases. Pathogenic microorganisms with pathogenic microorganisms. Fire with fire.” Eugene explained. “Interdepartmental drinks were had, relationships made, information shared. I am keenly aware of all the details behind failsafe devices and delivery systems to kill every living person on this planet.”

Everyone stared at him, stunned by what he was explaining to them. There were diseases, man-made pathogens that could kill the entire human race. That’s what the walkers were the result of. One of these pathogens.

“I believe with a little tweaking on the terminals in DC, we can flip the script.” Eugene continued. “Take out every last dead one of them. Fire with fire.”

Eugene couldn’t help but smirk. “With all things being equal it does sound pretty badass.”

“So let’s get back to work.” Maggie told them, refusing to waste another second talking when they had a warzone to escape from.

Suddenly the door rolled open, causing them all to jump up and ready their weapons. At the entrance to the train car, Rick stood with his assault rifle, revealing the chaos outside. Flames raged everyone and walkers were all around. Behind him, Daryl, Bob, Glenn and Jason were all hacking away at the walkers that drew too close.

“Come on!” Rick shouted. “We fight to the fence!”

“You do not leave his side!” Abraham shouted at Rosita in regards to Eugene.

They all jumped out of the train car and started using their new weapons while Rick fired at the approaching undead. Carl rushed up to him.

“Carl!” Rick greeted his son with a firm grasp of his arm before letting go to continue shooting.

Jason quickly rushed back into the group after decapitating another walker and stayed by Carl’s side. Any walkers that got too close received his machete to the head. The whole group moved forward, using their sharpened wooden stakes to stab the walkers in the dead whenever they were in the way or got too close. Abraham used the single stake on his glove to slice open a walker’s neck while Maggie and Tara stabbed walkers in the eyes. Daryl kicked one walker against a wall and shoved his metal pipe through the head of another one before swinging it into the face of the walker against the wall, smashing its face. Rosita used her three metal claws to slice at the faces of any walkers that got too close.

They all ran as fast as they could away from the herd behind them that seemed to grow in size continuously. A walker came close to Eugene who skipped away, whimpering in fear before Sasha shot it in the head with the Beretta that Bob gave her. Bob himself used Sasha’s wooden stake to stab walkers in the head as they made their way through the herd. Michonne used the sharpened stakes on both ends of her scabbard to kill two walkers at the same time with simple thrusts back and forth.

“Here!” Carl called out, holding a walker by the arms as it tried to bite at him.

The walker’s head split in two down the middle as Jason’s machete slammed into it, allowing Carl to let go and leave the corpse to collapse to the floor. Jason placed a hand on Carl’s back and pushed him ahead, looking out for any more walkers or armed Terminus members.

Rosita rushed over to the fence and stabbed a walker in the eye through the gaps in the chain links. She grabbed a large blanket of thick fabric and tossed it over the top of the fence to prevent anyone being cut by the barbed wire at the top.

“Up and over!” She called.

As they ran to the fence, Rick continued to fire at the approaching walkers in short bursts but he was hardly making a dent. Up on the roof top he spotted Gareth and a couple of his men, guns at the ready. He rapidly aimed up and shot at them wildly, striking Gareth in the shoulder as his men dived for cover.

“Let’s go! Move!” Abraham shouted at the others.

“Come on!” Maggie called to Rick as the former cop finally decided to retreat.

They all quickly made their way over the fence, with Abraham being the last one just before the herd reached it, crashing against it in a desperate attempt to grab and consume living flesh. Their groans and snarls deafening to the ears and the smell of their rotten flesh an assault to the senses. Smoke rose into the sky, forming a huge dark cloud as Terminus continued to burn.

The group quickly rushed into the woodland to escape the walkers and hopefully lose their attention. Rick led them back round to where he, Michonne, Carl, Daryl and Jason had first entered Terminus.

“It’s right here.” Daryl called, unearthing a hidden shovel.

He handed it to Rick who started digging. He was fast and certain.

“The hell we stood around here for?” Abraham asked them impatiently.

“Guns. Some supplies.” Rick answered, revealing the buried gun bag. “Go along the fences, use the rifles. Take out the rest of them.”

“What?” Glenn asked, shocked at what Rick was saying.

Rick looked up at him. “They don’t get to live.”

“Rick, we got out.” Glenn argued. “It’s over.”

Rick took out his Colt Python, double checking that it was still loaded.

“It’s not over until they’re all dead.” He retorted.

“The hell it isn’t!” Rosita argued. “That place is on fire, full of walkers.”

“I’m not sticking around with this crap, we just made it out.” Abraham told Rick.

“The fences are down.” Maggie argued. “They’ll run or die.”

Rick glared at them, amazed that they were all standing against him after what had happened to them. Especially at his own people after what happened with the Governor when they failed to finish him. He could feel it in the pit of his stomach that if they didn’t finish off the people at Terminus then they would end up regretting it.

“No, Rick’s right.” Jason defended their leader. “Those people are too dangerous.”

“I have to get Eugene to Washington.” Abraham countered. “I’m not risking his life just because you want revenge.”

“Then go to Washington.” Jason hissed as he grabbed a shotgun from the bag.

“What the hell are you doing?” Abraham asked the younger man as he turned their back to them.

“I’m going back in.” Jason answered. “Don’t wait up.”

“To keep Eugene safe we should stay together as a group and go to DC together.” Abraham answered. “You’re coming with us. Saving the world is more important than revenge.”

“It isn’t about revenge.” Jason retorted. “They’ve got my bag. I’m going to get it.”

“You’re going to _what_?” Michonne asked him with a glare.

“That’s suicide.” Daryl told him, leaning his arm against a tree.

“I’ll be fine.” Jason answered.

“You’re wasting time.” Abraham argued. “We need to leave and head to DC.”

“So you keep saying!” Jason spat back. “I’m not stopping you!”

“Can’t let you go back in there.” Rick growled to Jason with a shake of his head.

“You can and you will.” Jason stood his ground. “Use the rifles to cover me. I’ll be in and out before you know it.”

Jason turned and headed for the fence but Carl stood in his way, arms outstretched. He glared up at Jason angrily.

“You’re not going alone.” Carl told him confidently. “I’m going with you.”

“No you’re not.” Jason countered. “Absolutely not.”

“Why not? Because I’m a kid?” Carl asked spitefully. “Because I’m too weak? Because you don’t care?”

Jason was taken aback but Carl’s remark. How could he possibly infer that it had anything to do with him at all or that Jason didn’t care? Jason put his shotgun on the ground and placed both hands on Carl’s shoulders. He shook his head.

“It’s none of those things, Carl. I don’t want you to get hurt.” Jason answered. “I can’t risk that happening. I care far too much about you to even consider it. I…”

Jason trailed off when he remembered where he was. All the group were watching and listening, most notably Rick. He shook his head and rubbed Carl’s shoulders.

“I’ll be back. I promise.” He told the teen, putting on a smile but he knew it didn’t trick Carl in the slightest.

“This is a mistake.” Carl told him, voicing his fears. Carl knew if Jason went back in there he wouldn’t come back out. They barely made it out as a group.

Jason picked up his shotgun. He stared into Carl’s eyes, studying the boy, memorising the look of concern etched on the boy’s features.

“I’ll explain why I need to do this when I get back.” Jason told him. “That’s a promise.”

Rick walked up to him. “Promise all you like, you’re not going back in there.”

Jason sighed in exasperation. This wasn’t a difficult decision, it wasn’t a complicated thing to do. He would rush in, grab his stuff and rush back out. Walkers were slow and the Terminus people would be evacuating the area by now.

Daryl reached into the gun bag and pulled out an assault rifle. He walked up to Jason and stood between him and Rick.

“I’m going with you.” He told the younger man.

“You don’t have to.” Jason answered.

“Wasn’t a damn question.” Daryl told him, heading to the fence.

“Cover us with the rifles.” Jason told the others. “Please. This won’t take long.”

Daryl climbed the fence and was quickly followed by Jason. As soon as their feet hit the ground they started slashing at the walkers with their bladed weapons, deciding to conserve ammo for the time being. Daryl stabbed the walkers in the eyes and foreheads with his knife while Jason sliced their heads apart with forceful swings of his machete.

The door they had first entered Terminus through was still open allowing them to rush inside and be hidden from the sight of the walker herd that was occupying Terminus. Once they were in the hallway, Jason decided to speak up.

“Thanks for this, seriously.” He told Daryl. He was sincere.

“Truth is I want my crossbow back.” Daryl told him gruffly, the hint of a smirk forming on the corner of his mouth.

The two of them entered the communications room to see that it was beginning to burn down. Several burning walkers stumbled towards them, forcing the men to use their guns to kill the walkers before they got too close.

Daryl took off running towards the far door, as did Jason as they both knew they were running out of time. The buildings were continuing to burn and the fires were growing more intense by the minute. The fires in turn attracted more walkers providing them with even more danger. Daryl kicked open the door as they entered the front area they had used for the meet and greet. It was also where Rick had figured out that they were lying. Bodies and burning debris littered the ground as the walkers staggered around looking for fresh meat.

The walkers snarled as they caught sight of Daryl and Jason but their post-mortem excitement was short lived as the bullets from Daryl’s assault rifle and Jason’s shotgun blasted through their fragile skulls. The two men rushed through gaps in the horde as they made their way across the decimated plaza towards one of the doors that had been blocked off when they first arrived. Daryl opened the door only to have a walker charge out of it, grabbing his shoulders and pushing him back. Jason used the handle of his shotgun to strike the walker in the head, staggering it but failing to make it let go. Jason repeatedly smashed the handle of his shotgun into the walker’s head until the skull gave way and its grip loosened enough for Daryl to shake it off him. Another walker edged closer from behind them but Jason blasted it back with a chest shot from his shotgun.

Both of them rushed through the door and slammed it behind them. The dark hallway was deserted so they switched to their blades. There wasn’t much space so the guns would be cumbersome against one or two walkers. They walked down the hallway carefully, listening out for any signs of danger before they reached another door. Jason opened it to reveal the armoury.

The room had several tables with different items on each. The table straight ahead of them had an assortment of weapons, handguns, shotguns, rifles, assault rifles, machineguns and even explosives. To the left were clothes from the people they had obviously killed and eaten. To the left of that table were bags and other belongings. Jason instantly spotted his bag and grabbed it. He unzipped it and double checked that everything was still inside it, smiling when it was clear nothing was missing. Alongside his bag was a child’s bag, a fluffy pink rabbit head bag complete with a teddy sitting next to it. They had eaten a little girl. Rick was right. These people couldn’t be allowed to live. The final table was filled with jewellery, watches, earrings, rings, necklaces, all sorts of different jewellery. While Daryl was looking at the weapons, Jason grabbed two necklaces that lay side by side and pocketed them quickly.

Jason turned and joined Daryl at the table.

“Strange. Michonne’s sword isn’t here.” Jason commented, grabbing his signature handgun along with Carl’s.

“Neither’s my bow.” Daryl added.

“Maybe some Termites took them before they got out.” Jason suggested. “Least we still have a crossbow in the gun bag.”

Daryl observed Jason. He had his gun, his knife and his bag.

“We good?” The archer asked, knowing they didn’t have much time to stick around.

“Let’s take as many weapons as we can.” Jason suggested, grabbing a large bag from one of the tables and placing different weapons inside.

Daryl agreed and did the same, making sure to grab ammo boxes as well. It made sense to at least loot the armoury for supplies and weapons before leaving Terminus to burn to the ground. Once they each had as much as they could carry, the headed for the next door which led them back to the tribute room with all the candles. The far door was open and the partially eaten corpse of the woman, Mary, lay on the floor.

They rushed towards the door and charged outside back into the walker herd. The herd was getting thicker as more and more walkers were being attracted by the fire and no one was left to kill them. As they ran for the fence some gunshots rang out behind them. Jason glanced over his shoulder. Gareth and a couple others were shooting at them from the roof top. They ran faster but a cluster of walkers forced them to separate. Daryl ran to the left towards the fence while Jason ran towards the containers to the right. The gunshots continued to violently ring out and pelt the ground with sparks.

Daryl rushed for the fence and climbed over it as fast as he could, falling over the other side out of his desperate need to avoid the gunshots. He quickly realised that he had returned with the group as Rick, Sasha and Maggie were aiming at the roof with rifles. He looked back, following the gaze of everyone else down to Jason who was still by the containers.

As Jason ran for cover one of the bullets blasted through his left leg, sending him collapsing to the ground on his front. He groaned and quickly got up as more gunshots rang out. Despite the agony coming from the gunshot in his leg he dived behind a wall to avoid the gunshots. Jason heard a snarl and looked up in time to see the walker descend upon him.

From the fence the others saw the walker descend behind the wall where Jason had landed before being quickly accompanied by two other walkers. They watched and waited, holding their breath for any sign of life. The rest of the walker herd marched past the wall showing no interest. That meant no movement. No life. Jason was gone.

Carl cried out in shock and grief as he realised his worst fears had just came true in front of him. He had told Jason it was a mistake and it had been. Just as Carl had predicted Jason had died in Terminus because he stubbornly went back into a warzone. Upon Carl’s cries of anguish, Rick angrily opened fire at the people on the roof and killed two of them in quick succession while Gareth dived for cover and disappeared.

As the others looked on with dismay, Michonne holding onto a crying Carl, Rick aimed his rifle at the wall. He could only see the leg of one of the walkers sticking out from behind it but the leg was moving. That meant the walker was alive. Jason really was gone or if he was alive by this point he had been bitten and was being eaten by the three walkers. Rick threw the rifle to the ground in anger. He had let Jason go. He shouldn’t have. Now the young man was gone.

Although Abraham desperately wanted to leave the area he wasn’t foolish enough to tell the group to move. Seeing Carl break down over the loss of his friend, along with the depressing silence that had captured the group, he knew they needed a few minutes to accept that Jason was dead. They had tried their best to protect him. They had trusted him. Fate however, had other plans.

Ten minutes passed and Carl had stopped crying. Michonne was still holding him in a tight embrace, understanding that the teenager was still crying on the inside. She too felt tears sting at her eyes but she had to stay strong for Carl so she wiped them away quickly. They all knew they needed to move but no one wanted to say anything. Rick wanted to comfort his son but he also had the responsibility as group leader to stay strong. He knew Michonne could handle it for the time being.

“I should have gone with him.” Carl sobbed weakly, feeling like he had let someone else die.

Michonne shook her head and rubbed his back. “No, this is what he was afraid would happen to you.”

“But I could have helped him!” Carl argued, his eyes and face red from crying.

Michonne wasn’t sure what to say so she hugged the boy tighter. She was silently grateful that the others hadn’t said anything yet, that no one dared try to force them to leave so soon after having lost one of their own. As she and Carl were stood at a distance from the others, she decided to try and get Carl to open up yet again.

“He was more than a friend, wasn’t he?” She whispered to Carl.

Carl didn’t say anything, he just nodded. Michonne wasn’t completely sure how to interpret his answer as they considered themselves family. Their conversation in the house before they had left the abandoned neighbourhood made her think that whatever the extent of the feelings, they weren’t simply platonic.

“You were important to him too.” She whispered, earning a hug and sob from the boy.

Michonne was good at reading people. It had been part of her job before the apocalypse and had become an essential survival skill after the apocalypse. She had seen how Jason would look at Carl when he thought no one else was watching him. She knew there were shared feelings between the two on some level. Unfortunately Jason was gone now. Whatever could have been would never be.

A twig snapped behind Rick and Daryl, causing them and a few of the others to turn around. With two rifles and Daryl’s crossbow strapped to her body was Carol. The woman who had been with them since they first met in Atlanta. The woman who had killed two of their own at the prison in an effort to stop the spread of a fatal illness. The woman that Rick had banished from the group as a consequence of that effort. She stood before them looking both strong and weak at the same time.

Daryl ran up to her and hugged her strongly. He had believed her to be dead. The archer had never said anything to Rick but he always felt the man had sent her to her death by abandoning the woman out on the road. Yet there she was, in his arms again. He didn’t want to let go. Rick and the other prison survivors looked on in awe before smiles crept onto their faces as they made their approach.

As Rick approached them, Carol and Daryl were almost in tears from the joy of their reunion. Daryl stood aside as Rick came face to face with Carol for the first time since he had banished her.

“Did you do that?” He asked weakly, referring to the destruction of Terminus.

Carol smiled weakly, fearing that if she was to speak she would simply cry so instead she nodded. Rick instantly hugged her out of gratitude. She had saved them. Though they had lost Jason if it hadn’t been for her attack on Terminus none of them would have made it out alive. Rick knew that.

“Thank you.” He said into her ear, still hugging her.

When they released themselves from the embrace, Carol stared into Rick’s eyes.

“You have to come with me.” She told him.

Rick nodded and looked to the others. They all agreed except for Carl who clearly wanted to stay by the fence. He didn’t put up a fight however, so they grabbed the guns from the two gun bags and followed Carol away from Terminus.

 

Fifteen minutes later they walked over the hill of the road as a small log cabin came into view. Closing the door, with a baby in his arms, was Sasha’s brother, Tyreese. The baby in his arms was instantly recognisable as Judith. Rick dropped his guns on the ground and ran as fast as he could towards Tyreese and the baby. His baby daughter, who he had believed to be dead since the attack on the prison was alive in front of him. Everyone smiled as Carl rushed after his dad towards his little sister.

Rick took Judith from Tyreese’s arms and held the baby close to his chest, kissing her little forehead as tears welled up in his eyes. His daughter was alive. Sasha ran into Tyreese’s embrace, realising that Bob’s previous optimism had been well placed. Her older brother was very much alive.

“Judith…” Carl gasped with relief as he stroked his baby sister’s head.

Rick kissed her forehead again as they both caressed the baby. After all their heartbreak some glimmer of hope had been restored in the darkness of their apocalyptic nightmare. Judith was alive and had been returned to them in perfect health. Both of them couldn’t help but cry as they held the baby.

Everyone looked on with smiles of joy and relief. Michonne was grateful that Carl could be allowed this moment of pure happiness so soon after the loss of Jason. It took the boy’s mind off it for now.

Rick placed a hand on Tyreese’s shoulder and thanked him repeatedly. A man he had believed to be dead had saved his daughter’s life and had kept her safe until now. It was the noblest thing anyone had ever done for him and it would never be forgotten.

Rick kissed the baby again and placed a hand on the back of Carl’s neck. He pulled his son into the embrace and held him close. As a family they were all alive and well. Though the pain of losing Jason was still very raw, this moment was too pure and too happy to be tainted by anything. This was proof that there was hope and if Hershel had still been alive he would have claimed it was a miracle. It was.

Noticing the walker corpses next to the cabin wall, Carol came up to Tyreese.

“What happened?” She asked him quietly.

“There were a couple walkers out here and he managed to get his hands round Judith’s neck.” Tyreese told her, referring to the Terminus member they had held captive.

Carol reached for her gun but Tyreese stopped her.

“No. He’s dead.” He confessed. “I…I had to. I could.”

Carol accepted this and put her gun away. Tyreese had finally found it in himself to take a life because it meant saving another. He was finally learning that sometimes that’s the sort of thing that had to be done.

Rick looked at the smoke rising into the air after having handed Judith back to Carl.

“Don’t know if the fire is still burning.” He commented, thinking aloud.

Carol looked at the smoke. It was black. “It is.”

“Yeah…we need to go.” Rick said, turning around.

“But where?” Daryl questioned him.

“Somewhere far away from there.” Rick answered, leading them past the cabin.

Rosita stared at Abraham, who was crouched by an abandoned car.

“We’ll talk to him.” Abraham told her. “Just not yet.”

He stood up and prepared to leave with the others. He froze when a sound caught his ears. Everyone else could hear it and also froze. It sounded like someone walking over leaves, their pace uneven. The subtle clang of metal gun barrels banging together also sounded through the air and reached their ears. Someone was coming. Someone who was armed. Realising it could be the last of the Terminus members, they all pointed their guns at the top of the road and waited. The clanging got louder and louder as the individual approached.

Finally the person walked over the ridge of the road. The clanging came from the bag of guns wrapped round their shoulder. Their hair was messy and their clothes were bloody. Their belt was tied round their left leg as a tourniquet, causing them to limp slightly. The group couldn’t believe it. Jason was alive and he had managed to find them. He raised his hands in a mock sign of surrender, given that all the guns were still aimed at him.

Seeing excitement burst out of Carl, Michonne took hold of Judith. Carl charged forward towards Jason, an excited and relieved grin on his face before he hugged Jason with so much force that the young man fell on his back. He groaned as he hit the ground but wrapped his arms around Carl all the same. Carl was practically crying into his chest. The shock of losing Jason, reuniting with Judith and now with Jason was just too much for the fourteen year old to process emotionally. Jason didn’t remove his arms from around the teen, even under Rick’s gaze.

“That’s the second time I’ve left you behind.” Rick commented, approaching Jason, who was smiling as he held Carl.

“Please don’t make it a habit.” Jason answered, looking up at the man. “That was a close one.”

“What happened?” Sasha asked the young man. “We saw you go down. We thought you were dead.”

Carl finally released Jason so he could explain how he had cheated death. It was obvious to Carl that Jason was still in a lot of pain but it was better than being dead.

“Those Termites shot me in the leg so I dived for cover behind the wall.” Jason began his explanation.

_As Jason ran for cover one of the bullets blasted through his left leg, sending him collapsing to the ground on his front. He groaned and quickly got up as more gunshots rang out. Despite the agony coming from the gunshot in his leg he dived behind a wall to avoid the gunshots. Jason heard a snarl and looked up in time to see the walker descend upon him._

_Jason held up his shotgun and pushed it against the walker’s neck so that it couldn’t tilt its head low enough to bite him. He couldn’t reach his machete so instead he grabbed his knife and stabbed the walker in the head. As the walker’s body ceased to move another one dropped down on top of it but because of the first walker’s corpse the new one couldn’t reach him to bite him. Jason pulled the knife out of the first walker’s skull and thrust it into the forehead of the second. The third walker quickly descended on him without giving Jason time to retract his knife from the head of the second, so he used his switchblade instead and stabbed the third walker in the eye._

_Jason rested his head on the ground and breathed a sigh of relief. His leg was agony and he could barely breathe with three corpses lying on him but he left them there upon hearing the walker herd march past. He held his position and stayed still, praying that the corpses would mask him from view and from being smelled. He was in luck as all the other walkers marched past him._

_Once the herd had moved on he wriggled himself out from under the corpses and leaned against the wall. He couldn’t hear any more gunshots so he was probably alone with the undead. Jason took off his belt and wrapped it round the bullet wound on his leg, tightening it as much as he could to help stop the bleeding. It hurt like hell but it was better than bleeding constantly._

_Once he was able to stand up he took out his machete and headed for the fence, killing any walker that got too close with well-practiced arm movements and reactions. He knew the group had moved on by now but they wouldn’t be far so he had a chance to catch up._

“Is it bad?” Rick asked him, gesturing to the tourniquet on his leg.

Jason shook his head. “Just a flesh wound.”

“Let me take a look at it anyway.” Bob offered, walking up to him and gently removing the belt.

“What are you, a doctor?” Jason asked him as Bob rolled up the leg of his cargos.

“Used to be an army medic.” Bob answered, observing the gunshot wound. “It went through nice and clean. We can find some bandages later.”

Jason nodded and was glad to hear that he would be okay for the time being. Walking would be difficult but he would manage. He always managed. He winced as Bob reapplied the tourniquet but said nothing to complain.

Once Jason stood up and looked over at Michonne he stumbled in shock. He glanced at Carl who was still by his side.

“Is that who I think it is?” He asked, looking at the baby in the samurai’s arms.

Carl nodded excitedly. “Yeah, that’s Judith. She’s alive.”

Jason couldn’t help but let out a laugh of joy. “Wow. Just…wow.”

“You good to walk?” Rick asked Jason, who nodded. “Then let’s go.”

The group kept their weapons at the ready and moved away from the cabin. With all of them together they took on the appearance of a militia moving through the woodland. They returned to the train tracks and came across one of the Terminus signs.

SANCTUARY FOR ALL. COMMUNITY FOR ALL. THOSE WHO ARRIVE SURVIVE. TERMINUS.

As the others walked past it, Rick decided to hang back. He took some leaves and mud and started scoring out most of the words on the sign, covering them so they were rendered invisible. Once that was done, he wrote at the top of the sign using the mud before discarding the leaves and following the group. The changes he had made to the sign read.

NO SANCTUARY.

 

**Apologies for keeping you all waiting so long but life has been pretty busy. This was another big chapter to get out of the way so fortunately the next couple will be more placid. As usual, let me know what you think.**

**I thank you all for the favourites/follows/subscriptions and kudos.**

**I thank my reviewers of chapter 8: rk0192, AtiliaDawnBlack & yheagrl. **


	10. God's House

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After escaping Terminus, the group encounters a lone priest in distress. He takes them back to his church where Jason and Carl share an important confession with one another.

The group walked in relative silence. All of them were trying to put the horrors of Terminus behind them as they walked as far in the opposite direction of the death trap as they could. Miles behind them, the dark smoke from the fires at Terminus that were still burning ascended into the sky. Rick led the group with Glenn and Maggie close behind him. Behind them there was Tara, followed by Carol and Tyreese. Bob and Sasha were close behind and were followed by Daryl. Close behind Daryl was Michonne, Carl and a limping Jason. Carl carried Judith in a bag which was passed between him and Michonne whenever they got tired. Though they weren’t walking particularly fast, Jason was struggling to keep up with his injured leg. Behind him at the back of the group was Abraham, Eugene and Rosita.

A female walker stumbled out of the woodland towards them. No other walkers were in sight. Michonne stopped walking.

“I got it.” She called out to the others.

She marched up to the hungry corpse and reached for her sword, forgetting for a moment that she no longer had it. Michonne lowered her hand and laughed at herself before smacking the walker with the bottom of her assault rifle. Once the walker was on the floor she held it down with her foot and slammed the handle of the gun into the walker’s skull until it was smashed into the dirt.

“Right there is why we’re waiting for our moment.” Abraham commented to Rosita. He didn’t like being out on the open road on foot with Eugene.

Rosita laughed to herself weakly. “Yeah, fair enough.” She knew they were safer as a large group and had no intention of running away at the first chance they got.

Once Michonne had caught up to the group she resumed her position alongside Carl and Jason. She immediately noticed Jason’s distinct limp and the grimace on his face with each step. He was being quiet about it but he was suffering from the constant walking. They would need to take a break or he would end up collapsing.

“We can stop if you need to rest.” Michonne told the young man.

Jason shook his head. “I’m fine.”

“You’re not fine.” Michonne countered, narrowing her eyes.

“I can manage.” Jason answered stubbornly.

Carl looked at Jason. The young man was obviously in a lot of pain and he was tired from the extra effort his movements required. He could tell the only reason Jason hadn’t said anything was because he didn’t want to slow down the group or bother Rick in some way. They needed to stop.

Carl handed the bag containing Judith to Michonne and rushed ahead of the group. He rushed up to Rick’s side.

“Dad, can we take a break?” He asked the brutal but caring leader that was his father.

Rick looked back at Carl. It was odd for him to ask for them to stop as he was often supportive of Rick’s decisions. He looked up at the sky and saw it clouding over but also noticed the sun was getting low in the sky. Rick looked back at the group as they walked. Everyone looked quite tired and Jason was limping pretty badly. He’d been shot in the leg before, he knew what it was like. He nodded.

Rick stopped and turned to the group, he whistled to get everyone’s attention.

“We’ll stay here for the night.” He told them and smiled at Carl who gave him a grateful gaze.

The group spread out and found the best spots to sit down and take a break. They would most likely stay there until the next morning as it wouldn’t be long until night fell upon them.

Abraham dropped one of the gun bags that he was carrying to the ground and sat down. He didn’t like taking breaks when they still had enough energy to keep going. He also didn’t like the idea of spending a night outside in the open, exposed, where anything could happen to Eugene. Unfortunately the numbers were against him for the time being so he would just have to go along with it.

Carl was crouched down feeding Judith from a bottle as Rick sat with them. Jason leaned against a tree near Carl, rubbing the gunshot wound on his leg as it continued to burn from all the walking. Maggie caught Glenn as he walked past her.

“Not so fast.” She smiled and kissed him before hugging him close.

Tara watched on, smiling to Maggie. Inside she felt lonely. Her previous family and friends were all dead and now she was in the same group as Rick. The very man who had pleaded for the safety of his people from one side of the prison fence while she stood with the Governor on the other side. She turned around and faced Rick who had just walked up to her, guilt written on her expression.

“You didn’t want to be there. That’s why I tried to talk to you.” Rick told her with a sigh. “Glenn told me you saved his life.”

“He saved mine.” Tara answered with a nervous smile.

Rick nodded. “Well, that’s how it works with us, right?”

“Right.” Tara nodded. “Hey!”

She held out her arm straight, her fist pointed at Rick. She offered for him to do the same. The bearded man smiled and punched her fist lightly with his own. She was part of the group now.

“Get something to eat.” He told her. “We’ll start back at sun-up.”

Rick wandered away from her to check on the rest of the group. They all looked tired but apart from the injury to Jason’s leg, no one else was hurt significantly. They would have a long and dangerous walk ahead of them if they wanted to find somewhere big enough for all of them and secure enough to feel safe in. He missed the prison and the security it had provided. Large fences, thick walls and shelter. Most of all, however, Rick missed the people.

Judith’s giggle brought him out of his dark thoughts and caused the bearded sheriff to turn around. Carl was holding Judith while Jason talked to the baby, pulling funny faces and making funny voices. Judith’s innocent laughter is just what they all needed to hear. It was a sound from another world, a world far friendlier than the one they were living in. It was music to their ears. Soon enough, even Carl himself started laughing at Jason’s silly little show. The laughter quickly became contagious to some degree with everyone enjoying the moment.

The laughter reminded Rick of a very important point. They didn’t have shelter, they didn’t have great protection and they didn’t have as many people as they used to. What they all did have was each other. They were a pack, a family and together they could all find the light to overcome the darkness of the apocalyptic, deadly world they lived in.

 

Night had finally fallen. It was dangerously dark in the woodland. The wood of the fire crackled as the flames burned it away slowly, offering light and heat to the weary survivors who gathered around it. Away from the group, Rick knew he had to speak with Carol. He had banished her from the prison, from a place of safety and despite that she had come to their rescue. She was the real reason any of them were alive. Why Carl was alive.

“I owe you everything.” He told her.

Carol shook her head. “You owe Tyreese. He was at the prison.”

Rick thought for a moment. Tyreese had indeed been the one to rescue Judith but Carol must have gone back there when she saw something had happened for her to meet Tyreese.

“You got back there?” Rick asked.

Carol didn’t answer because there was no need to. They both knew that she had went back. She reached into her pocket and pulled out a silver watch, Rick’s watch which he had handed to the young man, Sam, before he banished Carol.

“It was in one of their storerooms.” Carol told him.

“I saw them kill him.” Rick answered, taking the watch and putting it on. “That kid.”

Rick held out Carol’s old watch, which she had given to him as a replacement. The watch had been an anniversary gift from her abusive husband. It was an artefact from a life she no longer lived, a possession of a woman she no longer was. She shook her head. She didn’t want it. Rick pocketed the watch.

“I still don’t know about what you did but I know you knew some things I didn’t.” Rick commented, referring to her double murder at the prison. “I sent you away to this.”

“You said I could survive.” Carol interrupted him. “You were right.”

Rick nodded. He hadn’t been wrong but the guilt still ate away at him.

“I sent you away to this and now we’re joining you.” He continued. “Will you have us?”

Carol stared at him. The outside world wasn’t hers. They could go where they liked and if she wasn’t comfortable then she could leave at any time. She knew what he was doing though. Rick was simply trying to be respectful and hold onto old formalities. It was also a strange but sincere apology for having sent her out to fend for herself. Carol smiled and nodded.

“Thank you.” Rick answered sincerely.

On the other side of their basic camp, Carl sat on a log, the bag carrying the sleeping Judith next to his feet. Sitting against the tree next to him was Jason who was staring up at the stars through the treetops. The stars always filled him with a sense of wonderment. They were a reminder that no matter what happened on Earth they were insignificant little dots in the grand scheme of things. Even if the entire human race was wiped out by the apocalypse, the universe wouldn’t care. It would just continue as it always had and always will.

He was brought of his thoughts by Bob’s approach. Bob crouched down in front of him and smiled.

“Mind if I take a look at your leg?” He asked. Jason nodded with a smile.

Bob undid Jason’s belt, which acted as a tourniquet and rolled up the leg of his cargos. There was still blood but the majority of it was dry. Bob took out a bandage from his bag, mentioning that he had found it when he started searching the bottom of it, and wrapped it round Jason’s gunshot wound. Once it was on he rolled down the leg of Jason’s cargos and handed the young man his belt back. A tourniquet was no longer needed.

Jason smiled and thanked him. He stood up, with some effort, and put his belt back on round the waistband of his cargos and fastened it up. He sat back down against the tree and sighed. Unfortunately they had no pain killers and he really needed them. The gunshot wound may not have been bleeding as much as before but it was still a nasty injury and it stung like a very large hornet.

Jason turned his head and caught Carl observing him. The boy obviously realised just how much pain the young man was in and the look of concern on his face was easy to read. Jason smiled weakly to try and reduce his need to worry.

“I’ll be fine.” He told Carl. “Besides, now we’ve both been shot.”

“Hurts, doesn’t it?” Carl asked, smiling softly at the comparison.

“Like Hell.” Jason admitted with a sigh, clutching the wound.

“Why’d you go back in?” Carl asked him suddenly.

Jason stared at the teen, considering his answer for a moment. No matter how severe the gunshot was or wasn’t, the emotional pain his explanation would cause him would be much worse.

“You promised to tell me.” Carl pressed with a glare.

“They had my bag. I couldn’t leave it behind.” Jason told him with a sigh.

“Why not?” Carl asked, confused. “It’s just a bag.”

Jason sighed again and unzipped his bag. He reached in and pulled out his notebook of tally marks. He flicked through the first pages which had writing, like a diary, instead of tallies. Half way through the book he stopped and lifted out a bit of paper. The paper was a photo which he handed to Carl.

Carl carefully took the photo in hand and looked at it. It depicted two mature teenagers, one older than the other. One of them had straightened brown hair with one long bang on one side and one short bang on the other. He looked to be older and by his leather jacket, Carl immediately identified it to be Jason. It was a strange picture. Jason was happy in it. He wasn’t smiling for the photo, he was smiling from joy. Next to him was a slightly younger looking young man with tall, slicked back blonde hair who wore a blue hooded jumper. He too was smiling from joy. Carl didn’t need to ask, he knew the blonde was Kellin.

“It’s the only picture of him I have now.” Jason told him, breaking the heavy silence.

“He looks really nice.” Carl answered. “I wish I could have met him.”

Jason smiled, his eyes glistening with nostalgia and love. “He would have adored you.”

“How do you know?” Carl asked, realising it was probably a stupid question. Jason knew Kellin.

“Well, who wouldn’t?” Jason answered with slight hesitation. “Kellin would have been inseparable from Judith. He loved kids.”

Carl wasn’t immediately sure how to answer. He had the feeling Jason had just complimented him but it wasn’t clear. Seeing how Jason’s eyes lit up as he talked about Kellin told him all he needed to know. The young man beside him was still very much in love.

“You really loved him, didn’t you?” Carl asked. He liked hearing about Kellin.

“He was my soul mate. He was the one.” Jason answered with a smile that fell slowly. “He _was_.”

Carl didn’t know what to say. He knew that Jason would always miss the love of his life and that it was something that would haunt the young man forever. He placed the photo back in Jason’s notebook and hesitantly looked through it. Jason didn’t stop him.

The most recent entries had two sets of tally marks. One set was obviously the daily count since Kellin died that he had seen before but there was another one. Counting the marks he worked out that it had started a couple days before Terminus. They must have referred to the group that Jason was now a part of because he couldn’t think of anything else the tally marks could be for. Carl flipped to the front of the notebook and discovered that it had been a diary. He skimmed through the pages, all the memories of days spent with Kellin and how he made him feel. The love. The happiness. The fun. He came to a page, the date being the twenty-fifth of November. The first line stated that it was Kellin’s birthday.

Before Carl could read any more of it Jason took it from him. He looked at Jason, afraid he had been rude or too nosey. Jason smiled back at him.

“Your dad probably wouldn’t want you reading that page.” Jason defended.

“Why wouldn’t he?” Carl asked, confused.

“Too much detail.” Jason answered with the hint of a blush staining his cheeks.

Carl was confused but decided not to push it. From what he could remember from when they were on the road to Terminus together, Jason had mentioned that he took Kellin’s virginity on his birthday. Carl had been told how sex worked between a man and a woman shortly after the news of his mother’s pregnancy. However, he had no knowledge of what two men could do. This made him curious to read the passage. Carl knew better than to push it and decided to respect Jason’s privacy for the time being but made a mental note to ask him about it in the near future.

Carol sat on the other side of the camp with Daryl. The hunter rested his chin on the handle of his crossbow as he stared at the woman next to him. He had believed her to be dead after Rick banished her from the prison. He understood why Rick did it but he didn’t agree with the leader. Carol had killed two of their own people in an effort to stop a disease from spreading. Even though what she did was horrific it was equally nasty to abandon her like that. Carol herself seemed to be fine with it all. She had come a long way since the days of being a scared little housewife.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Carol told him, breaking the silence. “I can’t. Just need to forget it.”

Carol turned to stare back at the hunter beside her. Daryl considered her words carefully. She wanted them to forget about her murdering two of their own. Both people had been close to Tyreese and he had forgiven her for it. Perhaps that was all that mattered.

“Alright.” Daryl finally answered.

A twig snapped in the darkness, alerting Daryl and making him stand up with his crossbow at the ready. They were exposed and it was very dark. Anything or anyone could be lurking in the shadows. He strained his eyes but he couldn’t see anything. No movement. No noise.

“It’s nothing.” He commented and relaxed, allowing them to sit down again.

 

_Laughter and the clicking of game controllers filled the room. Jason and Kellin sat crossed legged on the floor in front of a large HD television, GameCube controllers were in their hands as the played Super Smash Bros Brawl on Jason’s Nintendo Wii. They were playing against each other in a wild match with two high-level computer controlled opponents._

_“Get wrecked!” Jason shouted at the computer opponent as his Captain Falcon landed an explosive Falcon Punch._

_The attack sent the computer opponent flying off the screen as they lost a life. Jason clicked at the controller and made Captain Falcon taunt only to have Kellin’s Kirby throw a bomb at him. As he was taunting, Jason couldn’t avoid the bomb and he screamed as Captain Falcon was sent rocketing out of the arena. Kellin laughed loudly at Jason’s exaggerated reaction which quickly got Jason laughing with him._

_Jason’s Captain Falcon respawned on the stage. He dropped down and chased after Kellin’s Kirby, trying to land various punches and kicks as Kellin ran from him._

_“Get back here you sneaky bastard!” Jason called out to him, finally landing a powerful kick._

_Kellin laughed as his Kirby bounced across the stage but failed to fly off the screen. Jason renewed his chase which earned his Captain Falcon a hammer to the face courtesy of Kellin’s Kirby. They were both on one life and had high damage. Either one of them could lose or win. Jason’s Captain Falcon recovered and picked up an item boxed, he dropped it at his feet but it exploded and sent him flying out the stage with a scream. Kellin doubled over on the floor laughing at his boyfriend’s misfortune._

_Once Jason had finished laughing at his own bad luck, Kellin was still laughing his head off at having one because of something so stupid._

_“Oh shut up!” Jason said jokingly, still grinning in amusement._

_“Make me!” Kellin retorted, sitting up again, still laughing._

_Jason closed the gap between them and kissed Kellin strongly, pushing him onto his back on the floor. Jason’s movements were fluid as he lay flat on top of Kellin as their tongues continued to battle each other. They finally broke apart._

_“You told me to make you.” Jason commented with a grin._

_Kellin grinned back and let his hands run down Jason’s back before resting on his hips. He held onto Jason’s hips and held him in place, staring up at him._

_“But I didn’t tell you to stop.” Kellin answered._

_Jason smiled and took the hint. He lowered his head and closed the gap between them again, kissing his boyfriend as strongly as before. Kellin’s hands wandered from Jason’s hips to his backside, squeezing gently. Jason groaned into the kiss, earning a giggle from Kellin as the indulged in each other, the videogame long forgotten._

 

Jason’s eyes fluttered open. A sharp noise was penetrating his eardrums. Judith was crying. He rubbed his eyes and sat up a little too fast, pain shooting through his leg causing him to hiss in discomfort. He looked around and saw Carol coming over to deal with the crying baby but he raised his hand as a sign that she didn’t have to.

Jason scooted over to the bag and lifted Judith out of the bag. He held her in one arm as he reached into the side pocket of the bag and pulled out some milk. It was still fresh so he supported her head and back against his arm and started feeding her the milk. The loud little bundle stopped crying and started sucking down the milk happily from the bottle.

Out of the corner of his eye he noticed Carl slowly awaken and rise up with a yawn. Carl noticed Jason was feeding Judith and smiled.

“You’re pretty good at that.” He commented quietly, so as to not wake the others if Judith hadn’t already.

“It’s pretty easy.” Jason commented with a smile, his attention on Judith.

“Did you ever get to do it before…?” Carl trailed off although it was obvious he meant the apocalypse.

Jason shook his head. “This is my first time with a human baby.”

“Human?” Carl questioned. What other babies could Jason have fed from a bottle?

“I used to work with animals at a zoo while I finished my degrees.” Jason told him with a smile. “I became a surrogate mother to some tiger cubs once.”

“That’s really cool.” Carl answered with a smile.

Jason nodded. “Yeah, it was. Fortunately Judith here isn’t as feisty as those cubs were.”

They both laughed lightly at this as Jason finished feeding Judith. He patted her back before placing her back in her bag, giving her a warm smile as she looked up at him with large, curious eyes.

Rick wandered over, still holding his assault rifle as he crouched down to Jason’s level.

“You didn’t have to do that but thank you.” He told him.

“We’re family, remember?” Jason answered. “We all take turns of things.”

Rick nodded with a smile. They were fortunate to have a strong and compassionate group. Judith’s existence was nothing less than a miracle, regardless of who the father really was. For a long time Rick had only seen Shane in the baby. After that the baby took on the symbol of his failure as a husband as he had been unable to keep his wife safe. Nowadays, Judith was a symbol of love and hope. A shining light in the ever growing darkness around them.

“How you feeling?” Rick asked the young man, waving a hand towards his leg.

“Still in a lot of pain but I can walk if that’s what you’re really asking.” Jason answered, staring back at the bearded man.

Rick nodded and looked around at some of the still sleeping forms of the group members in the camp.

“Good. I’ll give them five more minutes then we’ll get ready to go.”

 

Half an hour later and the entire group was on the move. Rick took the lead yet again and was closely followed by Carl and a limping Jason. Behind them Michonne stuck close, followed by Bob and Sasha, Carol, Tyreese, Tara, Glenn, Maggie and Abraham’s group. Daryl had been out hunting and wasn’t back yet. Rick had reminded the others that he was a trained tracker and could catch up with them easily.

The rustling of vegetation sparked Rick’s attention, causing him to turn and aim his assault rifle which provoked a chain reaction of everyone aiming their weapons. Daryl appeared from the thick vegetation and saw all the guns pointed at him. He held out his dead squirrel collection and crossbow as he raised his hands in a surrendering motion.

“I surrender.” He joked flatly.

The group relaxed and continued marching on as Daryl came to Rick’s side.

“No tracks, no nothing.” Daryl told him quietly.

“So whatever you heard last night…” Rick began but was interrupted.

“It’s more what I felt.” Daryl answered. “Like someone’s watching us. Gotta have been something.”

Rick nodded and turned around. He and Daryl were slightly ahead of the group so he whistled to the others.

“Keep close.” He ordered before turning back to continue walking.

“Ready to get some concrete under your feet?” Abraham asked their leader.

“I think it’s time.” Rick answered. It would do them good to find a road and give themselves a destination.

“That is sweet music to my ears, officer.” Abraham replied. “Follow the next road we come to, keep going north until we find a vehicle, good?”

“Good.” Rick answered, accepting the plan.

Tara, Glenn and Maggie were still lagging behind slightly.

“Tighten it up.” Rick told them flatly. They had to stick together as a tight group to survive on the road.

The group continued through the woodland, all of them grateful for a long break without walkers.

“Ah, wet socks.” Sasha stated.

“Cool feet.” Bob responded.

“Mosquito bites.” Sasha said.

“Itching reminds you that you’re alive.” Bob replied.

“Danger around every corner.” Sasha stated.

“Never a dull moment.” Bob retorted.

“The hot sun beating down on you.” Sasha said with a smirk.

“Oh come on, a glorious tan!” Bob replied with a grin.

This got a laugh out of both of them.

“I said it and I meant it!” Bob continued.

“No privacy.” Sasha tried.

“Captive audience.” Bob countered and kissed her.

Sasha fell back after the kiss to converse with her older brother, Tyreese.

“He’s a damn expert at that.” She told him with a grin.

“What was it?” Tyreese asked her with a smile.

“A little game.” Sasha explained. “The good out of the bad.”

Carl had heard their laughter and their kisses. Between Glenn and Maggie and Sasha and Bob, he was getting a better idea of what being in a relationship with someone you love was like. It also gave him a better idea of what it was that Jason had lost and what he himself had never experienced.

A man’s screams for help brought him out of his thoughts and made the entire group freeze on the spot. Rick held his hand up, silently ordering them to stay still. The man was alone, screaming for help and Carl knew how that felt just before he had met Jason.

“Dad come on!” Carl urged his father who didn’t move. “ _Come on!_ ”

 Rick relented and gave the signal for the whole group to take off running towards the man’s screams. Jason was left at the back of the group as he hobbled along as fast as he could but running was still beyond him with the recent gunshot to his leg. He cursed to himself. Jason hated feeling weak or useless.

They came across a man trapped on top of a large boulder. He was dark skinned and wore a black suit. He was screaming up at the sky for help as several walkers surrounded the boulder, clawing up at him hungrily.

Carl shot the closest walker in the back of the head, Rick crushed the next one’s head against the boulder. Michonne smashed the third walker’s head with the bottom of her rifle. Carol stabbed a fourth walker in the back of the head with her knife. A fifth walker advanced towards her as she struggled to remove her knife from the skull of the walker she killed. Daryl quickly fired his crossbow at the fifth walker, the arrow penetrating through its eye and into its brain. The sixth and final walker was swiftly decapitated by Jason’s machete.

Rick looked around quickly. No more walkers for the time being.

“Clear!” He called out to the group. “Keep watch!”

Rick stared up at the man on the boulder. “Come on down.”

The man nervously made his way down to ground level. Now that they could see his neck, the white tag on the collar of his suit revealed that he was a priest. He looked very uncomfortable as he stood before the group.

“You okay?” Rick asked him, unsure of what was wrong with the man.

The priest raised a finger before turning to his side and throwing up. Most of the group averted their gaze with slight disgust.

“Sorry.” The man apologised, taking a breath. “Yes, thank you. I’m Gabriel.”

“Do you have any weapons on you?” Rick asked him directly.

Gabriel laughed nervously and held his arms out. “Does it look like I would have any weapons?”

“We don’t give two short and curlies what it looks like.” Abraham declared impatiently.

“I have no weapons of any kind.” Gabriel told them. “The word of God is the only protection I need.”

“Sure didn’t look like it.” Daryl commented cynically.

“I called for help.” Gabriel answered with a grin. “Help came.”

Jason sighed and rubbed his forehead slowly, looking down at his feet. “Just can’t win with these people.”

Gabriel looked at him before realising that no one was smiling with him. They were all studying him seriously.

“Do you have any food?” Gabriel asked weakly. “Whatever I had left, it’s just hit the ground.”

“We’ve got some pecans.” Carl answered, offering him a small handful.

Gabriel took the pecans and thanked Carl sincerely. His eyes caught sight of Judith who was currently in Tyreese’s arms.

“That’s a beautiful child.” Gabriel stated with a smile. It was the first child he had seen in a very long time.

The group edged closer, defensive over the baby. The friendly look on Carl’s face also dropped away. Rick glared at the man standing in front of him. Something didn’t feel right.

“Do you have a camp?” Gabriel asked, uncomfortable at being glared at so intensely by a whole group of people.

“No.” Rick answered quickly. “Do you?”

“I have a church.” Gabriel answered nervously.

“Hold your hands above your head.” Rick demanded impatiently. He didn’t like the feeling he was getting from the man.

Rick started searching the priest for weapons with one hand.

“How many walkers have you killed?” He asked the first of the three golden questions.

“Not any, actually.” Gabriel answered nervously again.

“Turn around.” Rick barked, pushing the priest to turn around as he continued searching him.

“How many people have you killed?” Rick asked the second golden question.

“None.” Gabriel answered confused.

“Why?” Rick finished with the final question, staring into the priest’s eyes.

“Because the Lord abhors violence.” Gabriel answered.

Jason sighed at from his position, leaning against the boulder. “Must be a different Lord to the one I’m familiar with.”

Rick glared at Jason, a silent order for him to keep quiet during the interrogation of the priest. He returned his glare to Gabriel, narrowing his eyes in confusion. This man was hiding something. He hadn’t killed any walkers or people.

“What have you done?” Rick hissed.

Gabriel looked back at him with even greater confusion.

“We’ve all done something.” Rick declared.

“I’m a sinner, I sin almost every day.” Gabriel answered. “But those sins I confess them to God, not strangers.”

“You said you had a church.” Michonne commented.

Gabriel nodded.

“Lead the way.” Rick told the priest firmly.

Gabriel hesitated for a moment before walking away from the group slowly as they followed behind. Although Rick didn’t trust him they needed a place to stay before it got dark again and the church would have to do.

As they all followed the priest in the direction of the church, Rick recalled what Daryl had mentioned about them being watched. He kept his finger close to the trigger of his assault rifle as he decided to try and confirm any suspicions.

“Hey, earlier, were you watching us?” Rick asked Gabriel.

“I keep to myself.” Gabriel shook his head. “Nowadays people are just as dangerous as the dead, don’t you think?”

The group thought back to the Governor and to Terminus. Rick, Daryl, Michonne, Carl and Jason also thought of the group of Claimers who had tried to kill them and rape Carl.

“No.” Rick answered sharply.

“People are worse.” Daryl finished.

“Well, I wasn’t watching you. I haven’t been beyond the stream near my church more than a few times since it all started.” Gabriel explained. “That was the furthest I’ve gone before today.”

Gabriel studied the serious faces of the group. None of them seemed to believe him or accept his explanations. He felt like he was some kind of alien life form to these people and he couldn’t understand why. He was a man of God, pure and just. These people didn’t trust him.

“Or maybe I’m lying. Maybe I’m lying about everything and there’s no church ahead at all.” Gabriel joked with a smirk. “Maybe I’m leading you into a trap so I can steal all your squirrels.”

Rick stopped walking, slowing the group as the chuckling priest turned to face him. His smile faded when he saw how serious everyone was staring at him. Gabriel was unaware that the entire group had just escaped from a people trap set by ruthless cannibals. Joking about a trap was not in his best interest.

“Members of my flock had often told me that my sense of humour leaves much to be desired.” Gabriel quickly defended himself, backing away as Rick advanced towards him.

“Yeah, it does.” Daryl hissed with irritation.

Rick nodded at Gabriel, signalling for him to turn around and continue leading them to the church. He was impatient and if Gabriel hadn’t been watching them then it meant someone else had been. That fact made Rick feel very uncomfortable.

They entered a clearing in the woodland and were greeted with a small white church made mostly of wood. It was a welcoming sight to a group that had been on the road for so long. It looked abandoned and gave the sense that Gabriel hadn’t been lying. Gabriel ascended the steps and took out the keys from his pocket, preparing to open the door.

“Hold up.” Rick stopped him. “We’ll take a look around first.”

Rick ascended the stairs up to the door and held his hand out for Gabriel to give him the key.

“We just want to hold onto our squirrels.”

Gabriel relented and gave him the key, feeling that it was all unnecessary. Rick unlocked the door and marched inside with his gun raised, followed by Michonne, Daryl, Carol and Glenn. While Rick, Glenn and Carol walked up the middle, Daryl and Michonne took the sides of the church hall and checked behind all the pews. The church hall was silent with no signs of anyone inside.

Michonne opened one of the doors on the far end and aimed her rifle inside. She and Glenn surveyed the room but could only find a table, a sofa and some children’s drawings stuck to the wall.

Carol stood over the desk in the church hall. A cross sat on the table along with several books, one of which was an open bible. Studying the discarded pen and half-finished page, it was clear that Gabriel spent his time copying the bible so as to preserve the holy word of God. Carol had stopped believing in a God a long time ago.

Daryl entered the other room on the far side of the hall. It was similar to the other, empty apart from furniture and a picture of the last supper on the wall.

Rick checked the desk at the front of the church, decorated with a large silver cross. Underneath the desk and around the border of where it sat were rows of empty food cans. It looked like Gabriel had indeed stayed inside the church for a very long time.

Outside the church, Jason stood and watched for people or walkers. Abraham, Rosita, Maggie, Bob and Sasha were patrolling the perimeter for any potential traps or hidden dangers. Everything was quiet and appeared to be safe.

Carl, Jason, Tyreese, Tara and Eugene stayed by Father Gabriel so he wouldn’t be tempted to move. Jason grunted as he shifted his weight to his right leg as pain was shooting through his left leg again. He needed to rest soon to give his leg time to recover.

“You okay?” Carl asked him, gently bouncing Judith in his arms.

“Yeah.” Jason nodded. “Just need to sit down soon.”

“What happened to your leg?” Gabriel asked him carefully. He knew bites turned people.

“I was shot while escaping a death trap set by cannibals.” Jason told him flatly, not wanting Gabriel’s attention. “They didn’t like squirrels.”

Gabriel decided it was best not to speak, having taken the hint that his previous joke had been poorly worded and ill-timed for the group.  

A strained sigh left Carl’s mouth and didn’t go unnoticed by Jason. It looked like Carl’s arms were getting tired from holding onto Judith for so long.

“I can take her if you need a break.” Jason offered with a smile.

Carl shook his head. “It’s fine.”

The rest of the group finished their patrol of the perimeter and returned to the front of the church. From inside Rick whistled to the others and declared it safe for them to stay in. Rick walked out and handed Gabriel the keys.

“I spent months here without stepping out the front door.” Gabriel commented. “If you had found someone inside…well it would have been surprising.”

“Thanks for this.” Carl spoke up to Gabriel, grateful that they had a roof over their heads again.

“Found a short bus out back. It don’t run but I bet we could fix that in less than a day or two.” Abraham told Rick. “The Father here says he doesn’t want it. Looks like we’ve found ourselves some transport.”

Rick stroked Judith’s head gently. He was glad that they had found shelter for her as she was the most fragile and vulnerable member of the group.

“You understand what’s at stake here, right?” Abraham continued, making sure he wasn’t being ignored.

Rick didn’t take his eyes off Judith. She was a shining light of hope and innocence in the world and it was one of the few things he lived for.

“Yes I do.”

“Now that we can take a breath?” Michonne interrupted, surprised at Abraham’s single mindedness.

“We take a breath, we slow down.” Abraham countered. “Shit inevitably goes down.”

“We need supplies no matter what we do next.” Michonne retorted.

“That’s right.” Rick agreed. “Water, food, ammunition.”

Rick ascended the stairs again and walked inside, followed by the group itself.

“Short bus ain’t going nowhere.” Daryl told Abraham. “We’ll bring you back some baked beans.”

Daryl wandered inside along with Carol. Glenn stopped beside Abraham.

“One way or another we’re doing what Rick does.” He told the muscular soldier. “We’re not splitting up again.”

Glenn entered the church with Maggie close behind him.

“What he said.” Tara commented to Abraham as she walked past.

Bob and Sasha approached Abraham last.

“We want to roll with you but…what she said.” Bob told him.

Bob walked past him and entered the church with Sasha behind him. Abraham stood where he was and smirked. He would need to convince them all to go to Washington. He could do that.

As the group got themselves settled, Rick took Judith from Carl to give the boy a break. He also needed to be close to the child to remind himself what it was he fought for day in day out.

“How did you survive here for so long?” Rick asked the priest. “Where did your supplies come from?”

Gabriel smiled. “Luck. Our annual canned food drive. Things fell apart right after we finished it. It was just me.”

Carl noticed that his father was still interrogating the priest so he walked up and took hold of Judith for him. He loved taking care of his baby sister.

“The food lasted a long time then I started scavenging.” Gabriel explained. “I’ve cleaned out every place nearby except for one.”

“What kept you from it?” Rick asked him, curious.

“It’s overrun.” Gabriel answered. He couldn’t handle walkers.

“How many?” Rick asked, confident in his group’s skill to kill walkers.

“About a dozen or so, maybe more.” Gabriel answered.

Rick nodded. That was manageable for the group if they did it right.  “We can handle a dozen.”

Sasha walked up to them. “Bob and I will go with you. Tyreese should stay here, help keep Judith safe.”

“Would that be okay?” Rick asked the large man in front of him.

“Sure, if you ever need me to watch her.” Tyreese smiled. “If you need anything for her. I’m right here.”

“I’m grateful for it.” Rick told him, stepping forward. “And everything else.”

“I’ll draw you a map.” Gabriel suggested, heading for one of the desks.

“You don’t need to.” Rick stopped him. “You’re coming with us.”

“I’m not going to be of any help.” Gabriel answered, smiling nervously. “You saw me, I’m no good around those things.”

“You’re coming with us.” Rick repeated coldly. He wanted to keep an eye on him.

Once Carl had placed Judith in her bag, Rick walked over to him and gestured for his son to sit down on one of the pews. He crouched down in front of his son.

“Listen, I don’t trust this guy.” He whispered.

“Why?” Carl questioned.

“Why do you trust him?” Rick asked, curious to see how his son thought about things.

Carl thought for a moment. “Everybody can’t be bad. Look at Jason.”

Rick glanced over at Jason, who was sitting next to Judith out of hearing range. He nodded and smiled.

“Well, I don’t trust this guy.” Rick told his son. “And that’s why I’m bringing him with me.”

Rick paused for a moment, making sure he had his son’s attention.

“But he could have friends.” Rick continued. “So I need you to stay alert and help Tyreese protect Judith. Okay?”

Carl nodded, accepting his responsibilities as a member of the group and as Judith’s older brother.

“Now, I need you to hear what I’m about to say.” Rick said seriously.

“Okay.” Carl nodded, ready for whatever his father had to tell him.

“You are not safe. No matter how many people are around or how clear the area looks.” Rick told him. “No matter what anyone says, no matter what you think. You are not safe.”

Carl stared back into his father’s eyes, surprised at his sudden honesty but he also appreciated it.

“It only takes one second. One second and it’s over.” Rick concluded. “Never let your guard down. Ever. I want you to promise me.”

Carl nodded. “I promise.”

“Okay.” Rick said as he stood back up.

Carl also stood up quickly. “Dad?”

Rick turned back around and walked up to him.

“You’re right. I am strong. We both are. But we’re strong enough that we can still help people.” Carl told the man. “And we can handle ourselves if things go wrong. And we’re strong enough that we don’t have to be afraid. And we don’t have to hide.”

Rick nodded. His son was a good person. Despite the horrors of the world that he had faced, Carl had managed to hold onto his humanity. Rick knew he was gradually losing his as a sacrifice for keeping his family safe.

“Well he’s hiding something.” Rick commented. He could tell.

Carl nodded. “I’ll stay safe, dad.”

Rick nodded and placed his hand on the back of Carl’s neck affectionately before heading for the door. He was followed by Bob, Sasha, Gabriel and Michonne. The doors closed behind them, the sound of them closing echoing in the church hall.

“Daryl and I are going to scout the area, make sure that it’s safe.” Carol announced as she and the archer headed for the door.

They received a nod from everyone inside the church as acknowledgement and permission to leave. As they headed for the door, Glenn, Maggie and Tara followed them. They explained that they were also going to head into the local town and look for guns.

This left Jason, Judith, Carl, Eugene and Tyreese inside the church as Abraham and Rosita were out the back of the church working on the short bus. Jason groaned with effort as he rose to his feet and walked across the church hall. He was looking for somewhere to lie back and hoped the church had a bed or sofa that was softer than the pews.

“What are you doing?” Carl asked him, having followed him quietly.

Jason turned his head to him. “Just looking for somewhere to lie down. I might need to later.”

Jason opened the door closest to him and smiled when he saw the sofa that rested against the wall. It wasn’t much but it would do as a comfortable place to lay back and take weight off his left leg. He walked into the room and sat down on the sofa to test how soft it was. It was old but it was softer than hard wood.

Carl sat down next to him, earning a confused look from Jason.

“I want to hear more about what life was like for you before.” Carl admitted honestly.

“Why?” Jason asked bluntly but innocently. He didn’t see it as being important information.

“It’ll give me something to dream about.” Carl answered honestly, looking down at the floor.

“What do you mean by dream about?” Jason asked, a little confused.

“What it would have been like for me now.” Carl explained. “If the world hadn’t ended.”

Now Jason understood. Carl wanted to know what his life could have been if the world hadn’t ended. He wanted to know the kinds of things a young teenage boy would get up to, the experiences he would have and the mistakes he might make. This information would allow him to build a world in his dreams that was still going. No walkers. No fear.

Jason smiled and nodded. “Okay.”

 

Gabriel led Rick, Bob, Sasha and Michonne down an alleyway in the town. The town was quiet and appeared to be free of walkers apart from those in the place Gabriel was taking them to.

“Hey. When you said they don’t get to live, you weren’t wrong.” Bob told Rick, referring to the Termites. “If we push ourselves and let things go, then we let some more go, some more and pretty soon there’s things we can’t get back.”

They continued walking, the birds on the rooftops above them were chirping as if the world wasn’t a deadly wasteland.

“Things we couldn’t hold onto even if we tried.” Bob continued. “Washington is going to happen, Rick.”

“I haven’t decided if we’re going.” Rick replied.

“Yeah, I know and that’s cool but you’ve seen Abraham in action.” Bob responded. “He’s going to get there and Eugene’s going to cure all of this and you’re going to find yourself in a place where it’s like how it used to be.”

Rick remained silent as Bob continued to speak his mind.

“And if you let too much go along the way then that’s not going to work.” Bob continued. Then you’re going to be back in the real world.”

“ _This_ is the real world, Bob.” Rick answered, looking at the devastation of the ghost town around them.

“No, this is a nightmare and nightmares end.” Bob answered with a laugh. “I’m sorry, I’m calling it. Washington’s going to happen. You’re going to say yes. There’s already too much momentum. You can’t fight city hall.”

Rick stared at the grinning man beside him. He was surprised anyone could be so optimistic after nearly two years of an apocalypse filled with flesh eating corpses.

“Or maybe that’s one of those parts of not letting go.” Bob countered his own optimism with a grin.

 

Daryl and Carol had finished scouting the area and had used the nearby stream to fill up some water bottles. They were heading back to the church down one of the old roads that was now carpeted by fallen leaves.

“Hey I get it, you don’t want to talk about it.” Daryl commented. “You okay?”

Carol turned to him. “Gotta be.”

“We get to start over.” Daryl continued. “All of us, with each other. You saved us all by yourself.”

“We got lucky.” Carol replied, trying to be realistic. “We all should be dead.”

At the bottom of the road there was a dirty, leaf covered car that had been abandoned at the side of the road for months.

“I’ll check it.” Carol told him as she walked towards it.

Carol opened the door of the car and sat in the driver’s seat. The keys were still in the ignition so she tried turning it. There was a faint clicking but nothing came of it. She grimaced in disappointment and got out of the car. She opened the boot of the car to search for supplies or something to help get it started.

“Hey, we ain’t dead.” Daryl said to her. “And whatever happened, happened. Let’s start over.”

“I want to.” Carol answered.

“Well, you can.” Daryl replied.

Carol stayed silent and checked the boot. There was an emergency starter there and when she pushed the start button on it a light came on indicating it still had some battery power left. She immediately turned it off and closed the door.

“We should leave this here for backup in case things go south at the church.” She said to Daryl.

“Will you carry one of those?” Daryl asked, holding out and letting go of one of the water bottles.

However, Carol had already picked up the two she had originally been carrying which meant the water bottle Daryl let go of crashed to the ground. Carol smiled as Daryl face-palmed.

“No.” Carol answered in a funny voice as Daryl picked up the dropped bottle.

 

Maggie and Tara stood outside an abandoned and empty looking gun shop. They were in town, the streets deserted completely while Glenn was inside the shop looking for guns or ammo.

“You know I didn’t want to mention anything when we looked this place up in the phonebook.” Tara commented. “But I just can’t imagine a gun store having left overs nowadays.”

“It don’t look good, does it?” Maggie answered, looking at the entrance.

Suddenly there was a crash of things falling over from inside. Tara and Maggie readied their guns and moved towards the door. Glenn came out of the door unharmed.

“Was it a walker?” Tara asked.

“Uh…yeah, it’s a walker.” Glenn answered, holstering his gun.

“Really?” Maggie asked, not believing his hesitant tone of voice.

“It was a stack of boxes and a mop and I tripped.” Glenn admitted, earning a laugh from the two women.

“Still, not what we came for but…” Glenn commented, pulling out three suppressors.

“You actually found something?” Tara asked, surprised.

“Three silencers stashed in a mini-fridge.” Glenn answered with a smile. “Rule number one of scavenging, there’s nothing left in this world that isn’t hidden.”

 

“We spent the entire night playing videogames and snacking on chocolate.” Jason was finishing off one of his many stories to Carl.

He was telling Carl about a sleepover he had had with Kellin in the early days of their relationship. Carl was smiling with amusement at all the funny conversations the two lovers had shared in their time together but he also smiled at how much the subject brightened Jason up.

“So that’s the sort of thing I’d probably be doing right now?” Carl asked with a grin.

“Yeah, probably. That would be the kind of thing to drive your parents mad.” Jason replied with a matching grin.

They both laughed at the idea of Rick going crazy at four in the morning because of the chocolate and videogame induced fun Carl would have been having if the world hadn’t ended.

“So was it like that all the time?” Carl asked. “Because all of this sounds amazing!”

Jason’s smile faded slightly but it clung to his face as he spoke.

“No, not all the time.” He answered honestly. “But those times made up for the bad ones.”

“Bad ones?” Carl asked, curious and hoping Jason would explain.

Jason rolled up the sleeve of his leather jacket and the black top that he wore underneath it to reveal some scars on his arm and wrist. They were the ever present reminders of the times he had self-harmed because of bullying or the traumatic childhood he had dealt with at home.

Carl leaned forward for a closer look, inching closer to Jason’s arm. “Do you remember what each one was for?”

Jason also lowered his head to his arm and pointed out each individual scar. He went down his arm starting at his wrist.

“This was from wanting out of my home life. My uncle used to beat me.”

He pointed at the next one down.

“This one was from my guilt at having finally fought back. He ended up in hospital.”

He pointed at the one below that.

“This one was from being bullied at school for not being one of the cool kids.”

Each time his finger went lower, both his and Carl’s faces followed it.

“And this one was from the bullying I received when someone learned I liked guys as well as girls.”

“I’m sorry all that happened to you.” Carl said to him lowly. He meant it. His friend had so much pain.

“It’s okay.” Jason answered. “It’s in the past now.”

Carl turned to look at him and realised their faces were quite close together as a result of examining the scars. Jason realised this too and smirked.

“We’re kinda close.” He teased.

Jason had meant it as a joke but Carl couldn’t help but blush at the comment. He knew he cared a lot about Jason. It was obvious to most of the group when they had believed him to be dead at Terminus. Michonne, as his most trusted friend, knew that Jason had become very important to Carl. He felt his heart pound in his chest. He wanted something but he wasn’t sure what it was.

Jason noticed the blush and the slight change in Carl’s breathing. He was suddenly nervous and Jason couldn’t figure out why. Their faces were close together and he had made a light joke about it but now neither of them seemed to want to move.

“What’s up?” Jason asks quietly, concerned for Carl.

Carl stuttered, their eyes meeting. He could see the nervousness and pain inside those blue eyes.

“I…I don’t know.” Carl answered. His face was still red and Jason’s questions weren’t helping.

Jason moved his face a little closer to Carl’s. They could feel each other’s breath against their faces with how close they were. He was starting to piece it together.

“Carl?” Jason whispered, not taking his eyes off the teen’s. “Do you _like_ me?”

Carl swallowed nervously as his blush intensified. His eyes darted between Jason’s eyes and Jason’s lips. He had never been this close to someone in his life. He had never felt this rush of adrenaline before, it was different from the adrenaline produced by fear or rage. It felt good. There was another feeling but Carl didn’t know how to describe it. Jason’s questioned returned to his mind, realising he awkwardly hadn’t answered it yet. It was an important question. Carl wasn’t sure what his answer was. He was feeling too many new and different things.

“I…I don’t know.” Carl repeated, his face flaming up with embarrassment.

Jason felt the very same adrenaline coursing through him. He had noticed how Carl’s eyes darted from his eyes to his lips, how he swallowed nervously and how red his face had turned. He recalled that Carl had never been intimate with anyone in his life. This situation was new to him and he didn’t know how to react. Although he said he didn’t know if he liked Jason or not, Jason took that as a positive reaction. He had to guide Carl through this. He had to make a decision.

Carl’s eyes widened as Jason closed the gap between them. He felt warm lips on his own. They were soft and gentle. Nothing was forced. His heartbeat accelerated. This was what he had wanted. This was why he had got so nervous. The feeling he couldn’t describe was want. Desire. Jason pulled away slightly and gazed into Carl’s eyes, looking for any signs of rejection. He couldn’t find any.

“Is this okay?” Jason asked, placing a hand gently on the back of Carl’s neck.

Carl swallowed nervously again and nodded slowly. He wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do or what he was supposed to say.

Jason closed the gap again, connecting their lips just as gently as before. Carl closed his eyes with Jason this time. Jason pulled him closer with the hand on the back of his neck, earning a quick gasp of surprise. Jason took that opportunity to slide his tongue gently into Carl’s mouth, exploring it and teasing Carl’s own tongue. Carl’s breathing intensified at this new, deeper kiss. He recognised it. He had seen members of the group kiss like this before but it felt totally different to how he expected it to. He liked it.

Jason felt a mix of adrenaline and serenity course through him. He couldn’t believe he was kissing Carl or that the boy was allowing him to. At the same time it was relaxing as it was the first chance he had had to be close to someone since Kellin died. _Kellin_. The thought of his dead boyfriend brought him back to reality. He was kissing _Carl_. Carl was five years younger than him. Rick had threatened to kill him if he touched Carl. He was touching Carl.

Jason pulled away. He had to fix things before he made an even bigger mistake that would justify Rick killing him like he did to the fat man who had attempted to rape Carl.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” Jason gasped out quickly. “I shouldn’t have done that.”

Carl’s face was a mix of confusion and hurt. “What do you mean?”

“Your dad told me he’d kill me if I touched you.” Jason answered nervously. “I’m no better than that guy on the road to him now.”

Carl shivered at the memory. “But I wanted this. It’s different.”

“I still shouldn’t have done it.” Jason countered, rubbing his forehead anxiously. “We just need to forget it. It was a mistake.”

Pain flashed through Carl’s face as he glared at Jason. “You don’t like me, do you?”

It was the only conclusion Carl could come to that would explain why Jason saw the kiss as a mistake. He probably just missed Kellin so much that he was willing to kiss anyone and pretend it was him for a while. Jason didn’t actually like him back. It crushed him.

Jason’s face fell as he met Carl’s glare. He realised he had made a big mistake and had given Carl the wrong idea. He slowly shook his head, his voice practically a whisper.

“No, no, it’s not that.” He answered, hating himself. “I _do_ like you, Carl. I like you a lot.”

Carl felt relief wash over him along with great excitement. Jason liked him back. His feelings were returned. He wouldn’t have to face rejection and it also meant he wasn’t a stupid kid who didn’t understand his emotions. Confusion quickly dampened his excitement. Jason had still said it had been a mistake.

“So why was it a mistake?” Carl asked, his voice low with confusion and hurt.

“Because you’re too young, Carl.” Jason rubbed his forehead and sighed. “You’re not ready for such a commitment. Especially in this world.”

“ _Too young?_ Are you kidding me?” Carl spat back, hurt and angry.

Jason stared back at Carl, confused at his anger. It was true. Carl was fourteen, he was too young to be with Jason and now wasn’t the time to be thinking about romantic relationships either.

“I have to be afraid every day of my life. I have to kill walkers. I’m old enough to kill them!” Carl spat. “I’m old enough to kill people! I had to shoot my mum! I’ve seen people die all the time!”

Carl let his rage out. He wasn’t truly angry with Jason. He was frustrated. The one good thing in his life, the one thing he wanted and he could have was about to be taken away from him. It wasn’t like the walkers or the Governor. This time he could do something to keep it. He could stop himself from losing it.

“I’m old enough to live in this world. To be trusted by the group!” Carl continued to rail against Jason. “Even my dad said that I’m a man now! But I’m too young for this?”

Jason realised what Carl was trying to tell him. He understood the point the frustrated teen was making. He was old enough and mature enough to deal with all the horrific things in this world but Jason had told him he was too young for a relationship. How insulting that must have been.

“This is something I want! I’m old enough to know that I want this!” Carl wasn’t finished. “It’s something good. Something nice. Why can’t I have it?!”

Jason lowered his head. Carl was right. He was absolutely right. He was mature enough to have a relationship. He was mature enough to decide that he wanted to experience something positive, something warm, and something good in the dark, cold world they lived in. Jason would be wrong to deny him that.

“I don’t want you to get hurt.” Jason answered, standing up. “If we did this and I died you would be crushed. I can’t do that to you.”

“My dad told me that I’m not safe, we’re not safe. We’re always in danger.” Carl told him, staring directly into his eyes. “I want to have this for however long we have left. I want happy memories like you have!”

Jason sighed in defeat. Carl was right. They could all die in a few hours or a few days or a few months. There was truly no way of knowing. It made the warmth of love and intimacy even more important. It carried the risk of heartbreak but upon reflection, Jason realised it always did. Car crashes, illness, crime and accidents happened all the time in the old world to destroy relationships. Walkers and dangerous people were really no different. Nothing had truly changed. Carl needed warmth in his life, that’s why he clung to Judith so much. She was a symbol of warmth and light in his life. A sign that good things could still happen. He needed this.

Jason stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Carl’s smaller frame tightly. He held him there, taking a moment to take Carl's hat off so he could pull the younger teen closer. They stayed there, locked in an embrace for what felt like hours to both of them. Carl eventually moved his head up to look at Jason’s face.

“Is that a yes?” Carl asked softly, uncertain.

Jason nodded and kissed Carl’s forehead. “That’s a yes.”

Carl tightened his hold of Jason, pulling them together as closely as he could. His heart felt like it was fluttering in his chest, his legs felt weak and he had a surge of happiness. A feeling that was almost alien to him because of the constant feelings of fear, rage and responsibility he felt every day of his life. This was something warm. Something exciting. Something positive. They both needed it and now they both had it.

 

Gabriel led Rick, Michonne, Sasha and Bob to a large white building on the other side of the street.

“We’re here. This was the food bank.” Gabriel told them. “It served the whole country, all the cans at my church were going to end up here.”

Rick opened the door and aimed his assault rifle as he slowly walked inside. The others followed closely behind him with their weapons at the ready with Gabriel going in last. The building was quiet with no sign of walkers. Rick walked into the main hall that would have been used for gatherings but could only see clothes racks and discarded clothes on the floor. The place was abandoned.

The sound of water splashing contradicted him. He held his hand up to the others and looked at the large hole in the floor. The sound had come from there. He walked towards the hole in the floor, testing the integrity of the edges with his foot before signalling for the others to join him. Rick peered down the hole. The basement had been flooded with waist deep water and contained all the canned food along with several putrefying walkers. The smell was almost unbearable between the rotting corpses and the stagnant water they splashed around in.

“If a sewer could puke, this is what it’d smell like.” Bob commented in disgust.

Michonne looked up and observed several large holes in the roof. The cause of the holes was unknown but the daylight streaming through them explained how the basement ended up flooded.

“Water’s been coming down through that hole for a while.” She commented, observing the badly decayed walkers. “Slimed this place up good.”

“We can use the shelves to block them.” Sasha suggested.

“Yeah. That’s it, Sasha.” Rick agreed with a nod. “There’s our way. Down those shelves.”

They moved over to the side of the hole with the tallest shelf exposed and prepared to climb down into the wretched abyss of the flooded basement while Gabriel stood watching.

“Hey. I said you’re coming with us.” Rick told him, earning a shocked look from the priest.

Gabriel was absolutely terrified but did as he was told and edged towards the group to follow them down.

They landed one by one in the stagnant, filthy water. The walkers around the snarled and groaned hungrily upon becoming aware of their presence. Their skin was so water logged and rotted that it looked like it was melting.

“Here they come!” Rick called out as the walkers stumbled towards them.

The group worked together to pull one of the heavy shelves through the water to act as a barrier between them and the ghastly walkers. As the walkers reached the shelves they thrust their arms through the gaps in a failed attempt to grab at Rick and the others. The group used this opportunity to stab the walkers in the forehead with relative safety.

As the walkers advanced slowly Gabriel caught sight of one walker in particular. It had been an older woman in life, her chained reading glasses still adorning her face as she snarled and stumbled closer. Gabriel quivered with fear and guilt upon seeing her and looked for a way to escape. The others were too preoccupied killing the multitude of walkers that were occupying the basement.

Gabriel scrambled past one of the shelves and rushed for the stairs. He tripped on something under the water and flailed his arms to stay afloat and to get back on his feet. The female walker snarled as it slowly followed him. He grabbed onto the stairs and attempted to climb them but they collapsed under his weight from the water damage. Gabriel fell back into the water and gasped as he brought his head back up. The walker was still edging towards him so he backed up until his back was against the wall. He rested his arms on an edge of wood on the wall and hung his head as if on a crucifix.

Rick stabbed a walker in the face with his machete and turned his head to the splashing. He noticed that Gabriel was in distress and quickly stabbed another walker in the face.

“We have to get Gabriel.” He called.

“What happened?” Bob asked.

“I don’t know!” Rick answered, confused as to why Gabriel had ran off in the first place.

There was still an entire group of walkers on the other side of the shelf. If they moved they would be swarmed and killed.

“Alright, we’ll push down the shelf onto the ones in front of us and we’ll fight our way to Gabriel.” Rick commanded and started pushing at the shelf.

All together the four of them pushed the heavy shelf off balance and sent it crashing down on top of the putrid walkers, pinning them under the water safely. They quickly made their way past the shelf and rushed towards Gabriel.

Gabriel whimpered as the female walker continued to advance towards him, snarling repeatedly as if it were angry.

Sasha pushed one of the walkers against a shelf and stabbed it in the head. Michonne stabbed another in the head but was grabbed by a second. The walker was surprisingly strong for the level of decay its body showed which caused the samurai to struggle against it. Michonne reached behind her and found an egg whisk which she used to cave its head in.

Rick slashed open the head of another walker before grabbing the female walker by the shoulders as she reached Gabriel. He forcefully slammed her face against the steel beam of one of the shelves, smashing her skull to bits before dropping the lifeless body under the water.

Gabriel collapsed in shock, whimpering at the sight of the female walker’s head being smashed in as the others finished dispatching the remaining walkers in the basement with them.

Bob made his way over to a box of supplies, smiling confidently.

“I know which way it’s gonna break.” He declared victoriously.

As he reached over to grab the supply box a rotten hand suddenly erupted out of the water and grabbed his shirt, pulling him down towards it under the water.

“Bob!” Sasha shouted and rushed over to him.

Bob erupted back out of the water, holding onto a walker that looked more like a skeleton than anything else. It had almost rotted away into nothing. He fought with it and forced it towards an exposed pipe as it continued to snap its teeth together in an effort to bite him. Bob forced it onto the pipe, impaling it and holding it in place as Sasha smashed its skull in with a storage container.

“Bob? Bob are you okay?” She asked anxiously, checking him over for bites.

“I’m fine now.” Bob answered, visibly shaken.

 

Carl and Jason sat on the sofa side by side. They sat much closer together than they ever did before, now comfortable to be close together in private moments. The adrenaline of their confessions to each other and of Carl experiencing his first kisses was still rushing through them but they were gradually calming down.

“I think we should keep this secret from the others for now.” Jason told Carl, writing in his notebook.

“Why?” Carl asked innocently. He was happy and proud, so why should he have to hide it?

“It’s possible that not everyone will agree with it.” Jason answered. “At least not right away.”

Carl nodded. He knew there was one person that may not agree with it who they needed to tackle first before anyone else.

“What about my dad?” Carl asked.

“I’ll need to think about that.” Jason answered. “He scares me.”

“He’s not a bad guy.” Carl defended. “I mean, you’re not hurting me. I want this.”

“He’s still your father.” Jason countered.

Jason knew that he would have to justify everything to Rick and further proof himself suitable to take care of Carl. He had no doubt in his mind that Rick would initially be against their newly formed relationship but he hoped that would change with persuasion.

“What are you writing?” Carl asked him, taking interest.

Jason smiled as he answered. “An entry in my diary explaining how special you are.”

Carl smiled but also blushed at this. No one had ever called him special before so he wasn’t used to such blunt and open affection. He wasn’t complaining because it felt incredible to be so appreciated and cared about.

Jason closed his notebook and placed it back in his bag. He leaned back over and kissed Carl on the cheek before standing up. He offered his hand out for Carl to take it, which he did, allowing Jason to pull him up onto his feet.

“Come on, let’s help out so the others don’t get too suspicious.” Jason told him with a smile.

Carl smiled back and nodded before Jason led them back out into the main church hall. Tyreese was cradling Judith in his arms. He had just finished feeding her and was attempting to lull her to sleep. He smiled as the two teens walked past and headed for the door.

Once they were outside they saw that Abraham and Rosita had got the short bus working and had moved it from the back of the church to the front. They were still working on the engine so it probably wasn’t completely road worthy yet.

“My dad doesn’t trust Father Gabriel.” Carl told Jason as they walked together, the sun beating down on them.

“What do you think?” Jason asked openly, his gloved hands in his jacket pockets.

“Not everyone’s bad. You’re not bad.” Carl answered with a shrug. “He doesn’t seem like a bad guy.”

“Appearances can be deceiving.” Jason answered with a smirk. “So let’s have a look around and see if we can find any evidence of wrong doing.”

Carl nodded. It gave them something reasonably productive to do and it would help pass the time until Rick and the others returned.

 

After raiding the basement of all the supplies, Rick and the others had two large trolley loads of food and supplies. Rick and Michonne took charge of one trolley and Bob and Sasha took charge of the other. Father Gabriel walked alongside them as they made their way up the street away from the food bank.

“I’m sorry. I panicked.” Gabriel apologised to Rick for what had happened. “I told you, I’m no good around those things.”

“Did you know her when she was alive?” Rick asked him bluntly.

Gabriel averted his eyes away from Rick’s glare and simply looked ahead of them silently.

“Yeah, I get it.” Rick commented sarcastically. “You only tell your sins to God.”

 

Jason winced in pain as he continued looking around the church grounds. They hadn’t found much evidence of anything apart from some scratches on the walls. He still needed a proper rest but he had been too happy about what had happened with Carl to sleep just yet. He limped around looking for any other evidence but it didn’t look like anything significant had happened at the church.

“You should rest.” Carl told him, walking up to him with a concerned look on his face.

“I’m fine.” Jason answered with a smile which faded as he moved and winced again.

“You’re not though.” Carl retorted, placing a hand on Jason’s arm upon his wince.

“I’ll rest when the others are back, okay?” Jason suggested.

“Fine.” Carl accepted with a sigh. He could tell that Jason’s stubbornness would be a problem in the future.

 

Rick and the others walked down the leaf covered road towards the church, guiding the heavy trolleys with them.

“Do you miss the sword?” Rick asked Michonne.

“It wasn’t really mine in the first place.” Michonne explained. “I found it in the very beginning.”

“How’d you get so good?” Rick asked. Michonne was a master sword wielder.

“It was just me and them out here. All day every day.” Michonne answered, referring to the walkers. “Good long time. I don’t know what that was but it wasn’t life.”

Michonne smiled.

“Not like today. Stumbling around in three feet of slime for some peas and carrots? That’s living.” Michonne commented. “I miss Andrea. I miss Hershel. I don’t miss what was before. I don’t miss that sword.”

With that said they had arrived back at the church. They unloaded the trolleys and lifted the boxes of food and supplies into the church hall. Gabriel was happy to return to his church and the others were happy to finally get to sit down. Tyreese offered his help as Judith was fast asleep.

“Where’s Carl and Jason?” Rick asked the large man, having not spotted them.

“Out back looking around.” Tyreese answered.

Rick nodded and walked back outside. He turned from the door and went round the side of the church. Sure enough, Carl and Jason were standing together looking at the wall of the church with what appeared to be great interest.

“Hey, Tyreese said you were out back.” Rick called to them as he walked up to them. “Come on in, we found food, a lot of it.”

“Good.” Carl said in response, barely listening.

Rick glanced at Jason who was looking between Rick and the wall.

“What is it?” He asked them.

Carl pointed to the scratches on the blocked window. “Those scratches, they’re deep. Knives or something. Someone was trying to get in.”

Rick studied the scratches in the wood. Carl was right, these were caused by knives. His suspicions about Father Gabriel were beginning to gain weight.

“I found something else. I don’t know what happened but whatever it is, we can handle it.” Carl told his dad. “Doesn’t mean Gabriel’s a bad guy for sure but it means something.”

Rick studied what Carl had pointed out. There was a short message scratched into the wood of the church wall with a knife.

YOU’LL BURN FOR THIS.

“This was the only evidence we could find.” Jason commented. “He did something.”

Rick nodded. This was all the proof he needed to know that something awful had happened. Gabriel had hurt people somehow, enough for them to condemn him to Hell. Between this and the female walker in the food bank Rick was starting to get some idea of what might have happened.

Rick was brought out of his musings by another loud wince of pain from Jason. Jason used his arm to lean against the wall of the church as he hobbled along. Carl’s face showed concern and so did Rick’s.

“You need to rest.” Rick told him. “That ain’t gonna heal if you don’t rest it.”

Jason nodded in acceptance. “I’ll take a rest now that you’re all back.”

“Good. We’ll wake you just before dinner.” Rick told him with a smile. “You still need to eat.”

The three of them made their way past Abraham who was still working on the short bus and entered the church hall. As they entered the hall, Michonne noticed something was different with Jason and Carl. It was subtle but something had changed. She watched as Carl followed Jason into the back office where the sofa was, as if making sure he wouldn’t fall down on the way there.

Jason lay down on the sofa, shifting around until he got comfortable. Carl stood over him for a while, refusing to leave until Jason was relaxed and ready to sleep.

“You looking after me now?” Jason teased. “Doctor Grimes?”

Carl giggled at the joke and nodded his head. “Yeah, that’s me.”

“Well I’ll be fine in here.” Jason answered, still smiling and joking. “God will watch over me.”

Carl laughed at the obvious sarcasm from Jason. “I’ll wake you for dinner.”

Carl left the office and closed the door behind him. Jason lay back on the sofa and closed his eyes. For the time being he was completely alone and had the opportunity to get a bit of rest. He still couldn’t believe what had happened with Carl, though they weren’t officially dating he didn’t feel these things really needed to be said anymore. Jason felt a pang of guilt at being with Carl despite Kellin being dead. It still felt like cheating to him on some level because if Kellin hadn’t died they would still be together.

_“If I ever die, I want you to find someone else who makes you happy. You’re not allowed to be lonely and miserable just because I’m gone, okay?”_

Kellin’s words rang through his mind as if Kellin himself was standing next to him and saying them into his ear. Jason knew this is what Kellin wanted him to do but it was still difficult for him. It felt like he was letting go or forgetting. There was also the risk of losing Carl like he lost Kellin or leaving Carl all alone should anything happen to him. Unfortunately he knew one of those scenarios was inevitable so he had to make the time they spent together worth it. Something to enjoy, be proud of and treasure in memory. His thoughts slowed down as sleep claimed him.

 

After an hour of organising food and supplies had passed, everyone was back in the church. Daryl, Carol, Maggie, Tara, and Glenn had all returned from their runs. Abraham and Rosita had finally finished up work on the short bus and were now sitting in the church with the others. It had been a productive but tiring day and everyone was glad that they could finally rest. While everyone sorted out food, supplies and candles to light up the hall, Carl was elsewhere.

Carl had slipped back inside the office where Jason slept but wasn’t intended to wake him right away. His curiosity about the diary passage of Kellin’s birthday had gotten the better of him and he wanted to read it. If he was old enough to be with Jason then he was old enough to read whatever was written in that notebook.

He carefully unzipped the back so as to not wake Jason and pulled out the notebook. He flicked through the pages until he found the date he was looking for, the twenty-fifth of November. Carl quickly skimmed through the parts of the passage that referred to how the day had been spent, going out places and talking. Finally he reached the night of that day. The descriptions of what had happened were surprisingly detailed compared to the previous parts of the passage and Carl found a vivid image of that night forming in his mind.

 

_Jason and Kellin sat down on Jason’s bed. They had just got back from the cinema and as Jason’s parents were away they had the house to themselves for the whole night. They were laughing at some small jokes Kellin was telling when Jason stopped the laughter momentarily._

_“Having a good birthday then?” Jason asked the blonde with a smile._

_Kellin nodded excitedly. “Best I’ve ever had.”_

_“Well, there’s still one last present I have to give you.” Jason announced with a grin._

_“Oh? What is it?” Kellin asked. He was surprised that Jason had left it until late at night._

_“Me.” Jason announced with a smile and kissed Kellin softly._

_“But I have you every day, silly.” Kellin countered, using one of his many nicknames for Jason._

_“Not like this.” Jason answered._

_Jason then placed his hand on the inside of Kellin’s thigh and kissed him strongly, his tongue sliding into Kellin’s mouth to battle with Kellin’s tongue. As their tongues continued to duel, Jason slowly slid his hand up Kellin’s thigh until he was cupping his boyfriend through his jeans._

_Kellin gasped at the sudden contact. It was rare for them to touch each other so intimately and they had never had full sex before. Kellin’s heartbeat shot through the roof when he realised that’s what Jason meant by having him. That was the final present of the day._

_Jason smiled into the kiss as he felt Kellin harden through his jeans and removed his hand so he could pull at Kellin’s shirt. He broke the kiss as Kellin raised his arms so his shirt could be pulled off easily and as soon as it hit the floor, Jason went for Kellin’s collarbones, kissing and nipping them gently with his teeth. This earned him loud gasps from Kellin as he rubbed his lover’s sides, his mouth and tongue finding Kellin’s nipples._

_Kellin let out a moan as he felt Jason’s tongue flick and tease at one of his nipples. He was like mush under Jason’s loving assault as this wasn’t the result of both of them being horny or bored, this was a premeditated gift of love for Kellin’s birthday. Another moan left Kellin’s mouth as his other nipple received the same treatment. He was aching inside his jeans, knowing that it wouldn’t be long before Jason made his way back down there._

_Soon enough, Jason was kissing his way down Kellin’s body until he reached the waistband of his skinny jeans. He undid the belt and button there before pulling them down off his legs. Jason was still fully clothed and he could tell that it frustrated Kellin slightly. He stopped for a moment to pull of his own shirt before returning his attention to Kellin._

_Kellin let out a hiss of pleasure as Jason grasped him through his boxers, smirking at the reaction he received from his lover. Jason leaned forward and captured his lips again. The kiss was slow and loving as Jason continued to rub him through the fabric of his boxers._

_“Fuck, Jason!” Kellin hissed as they broke the kiss. “So good!”_

_Jason chuckled lowly at his boyfriend’s ecstatic reaction to his actions._

_“Tonight I’m going to make you mine.”_

“Carl!”

Carl jumped so suddenly he thought his head would hit the ceiling. His dad was calling on him, not knowing where he was. If he kept calling out he might wake Jason who would then catch Carl reading the passage. Carl closed the notebook and returned it to Jason’s bag, zipping the bag up to leave no sign of his intrusion.

As he stood up he noticed that his legs felt slightly weak and his face was flushed again. He had been enjoying reading about Kellin’s final birthday gift and couldn’t help but feel disappointed and annoyed that he hadn’t been able to finish. Carl took a breath and tried to focus on other things to relax himself.

Carl opened the door to the office and closed it behind him, returning to the church hall that was lit up by candle light. Michonne was the first one to spot him and pointed him out to Rick who quickly made his approach.

“Carl, where were you?” Rick asked softly, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“Just making sure Jason was okay.” Carl answered, trying to hide the slight nervousness that was coursing through him from nearly getting caught.

Rick nodded, glad to see his son was making sure everyone was okay even if it was one at a time.

“We’ll wake him in half an hour and then we can all eat.” Rick told his son.

Carl nodded to his dad who made his way over to Judith. After a tiring day and having been in the repulsive basement, Rick needed some time with his baby daughter to take his mind off the horrors of the outside world.

Michonne quietly approached Carl with a smirk on her face. “What’s going on?”

Carl stared back at her blankly. “What do you mean?”

“You and Jason.” Michonne answered, keeping her voice low. “Something’s different.”

Carl blushed and looked at the floor. He hadn’t expected anyone to catch on so quickly, not even Michonne. Michonne tilted her head and smiled as she caught Carl’s eyes under his hat.

“Well?” Michonne asked.

“Promise not to tell my dad?” Carl asked her, glancing over at the bearded man who was busy playing with Judith.

“Of course.” Michonne replied seriously. She remembered how protective Rick was of Carl.

“We _like_ each other.” Carl answered sheepishly.  “But we’re keeping it a secret for now.”

“Why?” Michonne asked. “I don’t think the group would care.”

“My dad. Jason’s scared of him.” Carl explained. “Can you help us talk to him?”

Michonne nodded and placed a hand on his shoulder with a smile. “Of course.”

Carl’s face brightened up, grateful to have such a close friend like Michonne. Somebody smart and strong who he could trust with anything. It was a relief. As he turned to go back to the office, Michonne stopped him.

“Carl.” She called lowly, getting his attention. “I’m happy for you. Both of you.”

Carl smiled and gave a nod of appreciation before returning to the office where Jason slept.

 

_He couldn’t remember how they had got into this position. It had all been a blur. A kiss or a touch in a sensitive place that had made him lose control. All Jason knew was that they were in the office and Carl was beneath him, shirtless with his slim torso on display for him. Carl was lying back on the sofa while Jason straddled him, kissing his neck and grinding their hips together._

_Jason considered if it was too soon but it was obvious Carl wanted it. He could feel it. Carl was as hard as he was. The moans that left Carl’s mouth drove him crazy. He needed to hear more. He kept in mind he would need to take it slow. This was Carl’s first time and it couldn’t be rushed._

_As he reached lower to undo Carl’s jeans a strong pair of hands gripped his shoulders causing him to hiss in surprise and pain. Whoever had grabbed him pulled him off Carl and threw him against the wall of the office, the force of the impact making his head slam against the wall._

_Jason shook his head to clear the dizzying effect of the brief meeting between the wall and his head and looked up. Rick stood over him. His eyes were ice cold as they glared at him furiously. Rick’s face and hands were shaking with rage. Just like they had that night with the Claimers._

_“I told you not to touch him.” Rick snarled. “I warned you.”_

_Jason held his hands up defensively. Fear was shooting through him, his heart racing and his hands shaking like jelly._

_“Rick, I wasn’t doing anything he didn’t want!” Jason pleaded quickly. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”_

_Rick’s expression didn’t change. He had made his mind up or he had let the beast inside him make the decisions. The former cop unsheathed his machete and gripped the handle firmly. Jason felt his blood run cold._

_“Rick! Please don’t!” Jason cried in fear. “I’m begging you! I’d never hurt Carl!”_

_Jason screamed in terror as Rick growled and swung the machete down onto him, hacking into him repeatedly._

Jason awoke suddenly, his body shaking with the feeling of a pair of hands on his chest. Sweat was running down his forehead, his heart was pounding and his hands were shaking. It had been a nightmare. He was alive. He turned his head and realised the pair of hands on his chest belonged to Carl.

“You okay?” Carl asked him. His nightmare had obviously been visible to Carl.

Jason nodded slowly, taking a breath. “Yeah, just a nightmare. That’s all.”

“What happened?” Carl asked. He wanted to know what kind of nightmare could make Jason squirm and cry out like that.

Jason gazed into Carl’s eyes for a moment. He could be honest and say the nightmare had been of Rick hacking him to death for having a sexual encounter with his son or he could cover it up.

“I lost you.” Jason lied, taking one of Carl’s hands in his own and giving it a gentle squeeze.

“Well, I’m here.” Carl answered, not really sure of how to respond. He squeezed back.

Jason smiled and gave Carl a quick but gentle kiss before he sat up. Carl still wasn’t used to being kissed by anyone outside of his family. He always froze and blushed when Jason kissed him unexpectedly.

“Time for dinner, I’m guessing?” Jason asked him as he stood up, wincing slightly as he applied weight to his leg.

Carl nodded, the question bringing him back to reality. “Yeah.”

Jason rubbed Carl’s back with one hand and smiled. “Come on then.”

They separated themselves and headed out of the office into the church hall to join the others.

 

The church hall was alive with conversation and the sound of metal cutlery knocking against plates and bowls. Various cans of food had been opened and emptied into bowls where everyone could help themselves to what it was they wanted. The candles that lit the hall cast strange, deformed shadows on the walls as the group conversed and consumed their dinner. One of the most striking sounds was that of laughter. They often had so few opportunities to laugh that it was a momentous occasion when they could, no matter how small or simple the cause of the laughter was.

Rick sat with Judith in his arms as he fed her. She had also decided to feed Rick and would place food in his mouth. Jason thought it was one of the most adorable things he had ever seen and it gave him a glimpse of the man Rick used to be before the world ended.

“I’d like to propose a toast.” Abraham called out, standing over them as the others seated themselves.

Jason and Carl quickly filled their plates and sat down together to listen to what Abraham had to say along with everyone else.

“I look around this room and I see survivors. Each and every one of you has earned that title.” Abraham announced and held up his glass of wine. “To the survivors!”

“To the survivors!” Everyone repeated with him, lifting their glasses as well.

“Is that all you want to be? Wake up in the morning, fight the undead pricks, forage for food then sleep at night two eyes open rinse and repeat?” Abraham asked them all. “Because you can do that. I mean you got the strength, you got the skill.”

Carol looked over at the door of the church while Abraham spoke.

“Thing is, are you people for what you can do? Might as well just surrender.” Abraham explained. “Now when we get Eugene to Washington he will make the dead die and the living will have this world again and that is not a bad takeaway for a little road trip.”

Everyone fell silent at this. If it was true it would certainly be worth the journey. Everyone had their doubts on whether it was true or even if it was how the world could recover from such an awful event. Jason considered it. If he could help save the world so that not only could he and Carl be together for years to come but also so that Carl could see his baby sister grow up, that was worth any risk.

“Eugene, what’s in DC?” Abraham asked the scientist who sat on one of the pews.

“Infrastructure designed to resist pandemics of even this FUBAR magnitude.” Eugene answered. “That means food, fuel, refuge. Restart.”

Abraham smirked. “However this plays out, however long it takes for the reset button to kick in you can be safe there. Safer than you’ve been since this whole thing started.”

Abraham stared down at Rick who sat with Judith in his arms.

“Come with us. Save the world for that little one.” Abraham pleaded to him. “Save it for yourselves. Save it for the people out there. Don’t got nothing left to do except survive.”

Silence fell again. Rick noticed that no one appeared to have any objections nor could they vocalize anything in favour of the mission. He smiled. Judith gargled out a sound at him.

“What was that?” He asked his baby daughter, earning a laugh from the others. “I think she knows what I’m about to say.”

Judith cooed again.

“She’s in. If she’s in then I’m in.” Rick answered with a grin. “We’re in.”

Laughter and applause echoed around them. They were going to go to Washington DC and end the apocalypse. While everyone else was distracted, Jason slid his hand down and squeezed Carl’s without looking at him. To him this meant a chance for Carl to have a normal life again. Experience some of the things that otherwise would only ever be dreams to him, fantasies of an alien world. That was something worth fighting for.

Sasha kissed Bob, both of them smiling.

“Okay, I’m not going to let my brother be the only one that gets to hold that baby!” She declared to him happily.

“Wait.” Bob stopped her, gazing into her eyes. “One more.”

They kissed again, this time for longer. When they broke apart and Sasha walked away, Bob closed his eyes and lowered his head to hide the tears threatening to fall. He stood up and headed for the door while Sasha held Judith.

Tara sat herself down beside Maggie nervously.

“You okay?” Maggie asked.

“Yeah, yeah.” Tara answered quickly while she gathered her mental strength.

“I was at the prison with the Governor.” Tara confessed, shaking. “I didn’t know who he was or what he could do. I didn’t know who all of you were.”

Maggie’s face fell with shock. The memories of that day coming back to her. The slaughtering of their friends, the loss of their home and the decapitation of her father.

“I just didn’t want it to be hidden.” Tara told her. “That I was there.”

“You’re here with us now.” Maggie answered weakly and hugged the younger woman.

Rick walked over and sat himself down next to Father Gabriel.

“Thanks for the hospitality.” Rick commented. “I’m surprised you let us drink your communion wine.”

“There isn’t anyone left to take communion. The wine is just wine until it’s blessed.” Gabriel answered and took a swig of the wine bottle.

Rick noticed how sombre Gabriel was being. It was clear between that, the mention of communion, the female walker and the writing on the outside wall that the priest had dark secrets.

“It’s pretty obvious that you’re hiding something.” Rick told him. “And it’s pretty obvious that it’s something you can’t hide from.”

Gabriel’s face fell as he stared off into space. Rick was right.

“That’s your business.” Rick continued. “But these people? These people are my family and if what you’re hiding somehow hurts them in any way, _I’ll kill you_.”

A small distance away from the rest of the group, Jason and Carl sat together. Jason had deliberately led them away for a while and Carl was curious to find out why. Jason reached into his pocket and pulled out two necklaces that he had taken from the Terminus store room. Each one of the necklaces was one half of the Chinese Yin-Yang symbol. Jason handed Carl the Yang necklace.

“These symbols mean different things. This one stands for light, for goodness.” Jason explained as he placed it in Carl’s hand. “You are my light in this dark world.”

“What does your one mean?” Carl asked with interest.

“Mine stands for darkness and submission.” Jason explained. “It will symbolise my inner pain and that I trust you with my heart.”

Carl couldn’t help but smile as he put the necklace on and concealed it under his shirt just as Jason did with his own. This was one of the most unique and meaningful gifts he had ever been given in his life and certainly since the apocalypse had started. It was a hidden, physical symbol of their relationship. He didn’t know for sure if he could call what they had a relationship but whatever their connection was it was theirs. It was private for now. It was something that made him happy and made him feel complete. That’s all that mattered.

 

**So there we have it. Chapter 10 is complete and has turned out to be one of the most significant chapters of the story. I was quite anxious when writing this one because of all the different ways people could take to the advance in Jason and Carl’s relationship. Hopefully I’ve written it well over the last 9 chapters so that this one feels like a natural conclusion. Let me know in your comments/reviews what your thoughts are on this chapter.**

**Thanks for all the follows/subscriptions/bookmarks/kudos etc.**

**Thanks to the reviewers of chapter 9: rk0192, Madison188, Paty S, Sara P, LittleMissToughStaff and jar98.**

**Chapter 11 will be the return of the Termites. All this light heartedness can’t be allowed to last, after all. :P**

 


	11. Darkness & Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Upon discovering that three people are missing, the group find out they are being watched by the Termites. The events that follow test the conviction Jason and Carl have for their new found relationship.

The late night dinner and celebrations were continuing in the church hall, illuminated by candle light. The sounds of conversation and laughter continued to echo within its walls as the group enjoyed the spoils of the recent supply run and the safety of the church itself. It was an atmosphere of joy that repelled the fear of the outside. It was the light in the darkness.

Rick sat with Tyreese and Sasha while they played with baby Judith. The baby was a constant reminder of hope and innocence to them and any time that could be enjoyed was taken. Michonne also took a turn cradling Judith and interacting with the small child. The pain of her dead son was there but her interaction with Judith showed that she had finally moved on. Everyone was either laughing or smiling.

Everyone except for Gabriel. He sat at the front desk in the hall and opened the drawer. He pulled out a framed photo of himself with a woman. The woman wore glasses with a chain around her neck, she was beautiful and had played the organ during his services. Unknown to anyone else, he had been romantically involved with her which would have been frowned upon by the community and the congregation. Gabriel hated himself for what had done. Seeing her in the food bank basement, dead and rotting was the most horrific thing he would ever see in his life.

Inside Gabriel’s office where the sofa was located, Jason had his back against the door and his arms around Carl. His hands rubbed up and down Carl’s back affectionately, the sheriff hat on the floor so that their lips could connect easier. After giving Carl the necklace and explaining the meaning behind it along with the meaning behind his own, the younger teen had wanted some alone time. Jason had thought it would be to talk but it turned out Carl had enjoyed his first couple kisses and had wanted more.

That was how Jason found himself with his back pinned against the office door as his tongue battled Carl’s, his hands rubbing the other’s back. He was mindful not to rub too low as he didn’t want to touch Carl inappropriately. He couldn’t complain, kissing Carl was something he could never get tired of. The intensity of the kisses had decreased as Carl’s inexperience meant his stamina didn’t match Jason’s and his jaw ached a little. Jason broke the kiss and held Carl close, his hands ceasing their rubbing.

“We should get back to the others.” Jason told him, kissing the top of his head.

“Don’t want to.” Carl said, more into the top of Jason’s chest than to Jason directly.

“They’ll start wondering where we are.” Jason justified it, rubbing his back again.

Although one of his concerns was the others looking for them, specifically Rick, and for them to get caught, his real concern was his self-control. It took a lot of will power not to feel more of Carl’s body than limiting it to his back. Jason knew if he let his hands go anywhere else then things would simply escalate and he couldn’t allow that to happen. It was far too soon.

“Why don’t we ask Daryl about teaching you to use the crossbow?” Jason suggested with a smile. “We have a spare bow and he did promise you before, didn’t he?”

Carl smiled and nodded. “Yeah, he did.”

Carl had momentarily forgotten all about that promise. He had pushed it from his mind when he believed everyone to be dead and with everything that happened at Terminus he had completely forgot. They had a spare that belonged to the Claimers and if Carl could learn how to use it then it could end up his. He smiled at the thought. Between the crossbow and Michonne’s sword training, he was going to be a silent walker killer.

Jason ruffled Carl’s hair and broke apart their embrace. He went over to grab his bag. Carl didn’t leave the office right away. Observing the bag reminded him of Jason’s notebook and the passage he had been reading before Rick had called on him.

“Can I read some of your diary again sometime?” Carl asked, a little nervous from his secret guilt.

Jason smiled back and nodded. “Of course.”

Jason trusted Carl enough to let him in and let him read about the life he had before they met, before Kellin died. He wouldn’t trust anyone else with such in-depth information. It was one of the things that made Carl special amongst all the people he had met. He knew there were certain passages he had to make sure Carl couldn’t read, however, as they were too mature for his eyes.

Carl was the first to leave the office, slipping out as quietly as he could to avoid attracting anyone’s attention. Jason had explained to him earlier that if they were to be together they had to be subtle about it to avoid the other’s noticing. Carl made his way back to the group and listened to their conversations while having a drink of juice. Five minutes later Jason also emerged from the office and sat down on one of the church pews.

Once Carl had finished his juice they both went on the lookout together for Daryl. It was immediately clear that he wasn’t in the church hall or any of the side rooms. They looked out the windows but couldn’t see anyone in the church grounds either. Daryl was missing.

“Dad, have you seen Daryl?” Carl asked as he approached his father.

Rick looked around. He had been so busy talking to the others and taking care of Judith he had failed to notice the archer’s absence.

“Wasn’t he with Carol?” Rick questioned aloud.

“She’s missing too.” Jason added, looking around.

Just as Rick was about to answer, Sasha came bursting through the front doors of the church, running up the hall towards the group.

“I can’t find Bob anywhere!” She told them anxiously. “He’s gone!”

Rick stood up and walked over to the table they kept the gun bag and ammo on.

“Alright, you, me and Tyreese will head out to look for them.” Rick explained, grabbing a flashlight.

“He can’t be far.” Tyreese reassured his younger sister.

The three of them grabbed some guns and headed out the doors, leaving the others inside the church. Father Gabriel looked on with a mix of fear and guilt as the doors closed behind them.

 

“Bob!” Sasha called out quietly.

She made her way between the tress, a powerful rifle with a night vision scope in her hands. The woodland was almost total darkness and there was no sign of her lover anywhere. On the tree trunk next to her she noticed a line had been carved into it with a knife. It looked like a mark for navigation. Someone was watching them.

The snarl of a walker echoed in the darkness along with the snap of a twig. Sasha spun round and aimed her rifle. With the night scope she could see someone disappear into the dense forest in the distance. Whoever was watching them had just got away again. There was nothing else. Just darkness and the constant chorus from the grasshoppers.

She turned her aim to her right just in time to spot a walker lunge at her from the darkness. It tried to grab her but she backed away and pushed it against the tree trunk, knocking it to the floor. A second walker approached from behind the first, snarling as it got closer to the woman. Sasha fired her rifle, shooting the walker in the head before slamming the bottom of the rifle into the head of the first one to crush its skull.

Suddenly an arm came from behind her and grabbed her, the hand wrapping round her mouth to muffle her scream of surprise.

“Sh, it’s me!” Tyreese said lowly before releasing her.

Rick stood with Tyreese, flashlight in hand as they checked their surroundings. Sasha took deep breaths to get her breathing back to normal after the fright Tyreese gave her.

“He’s getting away!” She told them, referring to the person she had seen through the night scope.

“Who?” Tyreese asked, having not seen signs of anyone in the darkness.

“Somebody was watching us!” Sasha declared anxiously, looking towards the forest.

“If we go in there now, someone’s not coming back.” Tyreese warned.

Rick aimed his gun in that direction along with his flashlight, looking for any signs of life.

“Bob is out there somewhere!” Sasha pleaded. “Scared! Alone!”

“Maybe not alone.” Rick answered. “Daryl and Carol are missing too.”

There had been no signs of any of the three missing group members.

 

Jason and Carl sat next to one another on one of the church pews with Judith by Carl’s side. Like the rest of the group, all they could do is wait for the search party to come back. The sound of the church doors opening made them turn their heads in the hopes of seeing six walk in instead of three. Their hopes were quickly dashed as only Rick, Tyreese and Sasha returned. Sasha immediately walked up to Father Gabriel who was moving some things around on his desk.

“Stop! What are you doing?” She asked the confused priest. “ _What are you doing?_ ”

She took a step closer to him.

“This is all connected. You show up, we’re being watched.” Sasha accused. “And now three of us are gone!”

Gabriel looked flustered as all the group’s eyes were focused on him, penetrating him like daggers.

“I…I don’t…I don’t have anything to do with this.” He defended weakly.

Sasha pulled out her knife. Gabriel jumped back. Rosita rushed to stop her but was held back by Abraham.

“Stop!” Maggie shouted.

“Sasha, put it away!” Tyreese called out.

“Where…?” Sasha began but was interrupted by Gabriel.

“I don’t…”

“Where are our people?”

“I don’t have anything do with this.”

 _“Where are our people?!”_ Sasha bellowed at the top of her lungs.

“Please, I don’t have anything to do with this.” Gabriel continued to defend himself calmly with his hands up.

Rick grabbed Sasha’s arm and gently pulled her away from the priest before taking her place in front of him. He studied Gabriel’s expression and glared into his eyes.

“Why’d you bring us here?” Rick asked him.

Gabriel shook his head nervously. They were the ones who had asked him to bring them to the church. He didn’t know what he was being accused of with Rick’s question.

“Are you working with someone?” Rick asked, taking a step forward.

“I’m alone! I’m alone!” Gabriel answered nervously. “I was always alone!”

“What about the woman in the food bank, Gabriel?” Rick interrogated. “What did you do to her?”

Gabriel couldn’t answer, pain shooting through his face at the mention of the woman.

“ _You’ll burn for this_. That was for you. Why? What are you going to burn for, Gabriel?” Rick continued.

Rick grabbed the priest by his collar and pinned him against his desk, glaring daggers into his eyes as he continued his interrogation.

“What did you do?” Rick snarled, losing his patience before bellowing. “ _What did you do?!_ ”

Gabriel’s lips quivered as emotions threatened to burst out. He knew he had no choice to explain what happened. The grief and the guilt came bubbling to the surface, turning him into a nervous wreck.

“I lock the doors at night. I always lock the doors at night, I always lock the doors at night!” Gabriel fought back the tears. “They started coming, my congregation. Atlanta was bombed the night before and they were scared. They were looking for a safe place, a place where they felt safe.”

Gabriel looked around, his eyes momentarily meeting Jason’s. Jason’s expression was beginning to change as the horrific explanation that was about to be told started to sink in.

“And it was so early, it was so early. The doors were still locked. You see, it was my choice.” Gabriel explained nervously. “But there were so many of them, they were trying to pry the shutters and banging on the sidings. Screaming at me and so the dead came for them.”

Jason’s expression changed from that of horror to utter disgust. This priest, this supposed man of God had locked his congregation out of the church. He had locked them out and left them for dead. Gabriel saw Jason’s expression and the look on everyone else’s faces.

“Women. Children. Entire families calling my name as they were torn apart. Begging me for mercy, begging me for mercy. Damming me to Hell.” Gabriel whimpered. “I buried their bones, I buried it all. The Lord sent you here to finally punish me.”

Everyone was speechless. The group were a mix of shock, horror and rage at the priest in front of them. He had let entire families be torn apart when all he had to do was turn a key to save them. Gabriel dropped to the ground, whimpering and shaking.

“I’m damned. I was damned before.” Gabriel finished, crying. “I always locked the doors. _I always locked the doors!_ ”

Sasha sheathed her knife and looked down on Father Gabriel with utter disdain. Jason stayed seated next to Carl, both of them in complete shock at what they had just heard. They all had their demons, all of them had done things they weren’t proud of. This was different. This was a horrific act of selfishness.

The sound of someone whistling came from outside. The person kept whistling loudly until Glenn finally made his way over and looked out the window.

“There’s something.” Glenn announced. “There’s someone outside lying on the grass!”

Most of the group rushed out to inspect the body lying on the grass. Sasha cried out his name when she realised it was Bob, who was unconscious but alive. Snarls from around them announced the arrival of walkers to the area.

“His leg!” Maggie pointed out in horror. The lower half of his left leg was gone.

“Get Bob inside, we’ll take care of him!” Glenn called out.

The Asian man rushed for the closest walker and smacked the handle of his rifle into its skull, cracking its forehead and knocking it to the ground with a hiss. Maggie stabbed a walker in the head with her knife while Sasha and Tara lifted Bob off the grass towards the church.

Rick was about to pistol whip another walker with his revolver but the walker received a bullet beforehand. The echo of a rifle sounded around them. Rick fired into the woods in the direction of the bullet. Someone was shooting at them.

“Get inside!” He barked to the others.

Once Bob was inside the gunshots ceased. Rick quickly made his way back inside, failing to notice the letter “A” painted on the church wall with blood.

 

Once they had got Bob inside and on the floor he had started to wake up. The group gathered round him in horror at the condition he was in. The lower segment of his left leg was gone but the stump was bandaged and his lip was burst open and bleeding down his chin. He looked physically weak and drained. Eventually the question of what had happened was asked.

“I was in a graveyard, somebody knocked me out, I woke up outside this place, looked like a school.” Bob explained, breathing heavily from the pain. “It was that guy, Gareth and five other ones. They were eating my leg right in front of me, like it was nothing. All proud like they had it all figured out.”

This revelation came as a shock to the group. Rick glared as he thought about it. He had made the right call in demanding that they go back and kill all of the Termites but no one wanted to. Bob had lost a leg because no one but Jason had agreed with him. They had let the Governor escape only for him to come back and kill Hershel. They had let the Termites escape only for them to come back and eat Bob’s leg. Now they were all in danger.

“Did they have Daryl and Carol?” Rick asked Bob, needing to know where they were.

“Gareth said they drove off.” Bob answered.

This next revelation confused most of the group. Rick recalled Daryl mentioning that Beth had been taken by some people in a car and could only assume that was who he and Carol had gone after. The two of them wouldn’t abandon the group like that otherwise.

Bob groaned and gasped in pain as he tried to sit up. Agony shot through his leg and up his body almost overwhelming him.

“He’s in pain, do we have anything?” Sasha asked Rosita.

“I think there are pill packets in the first aid kit.” Rosita answered with a nod.

“Save them!” Bob countered.

“No!” Sasha argued, not letting her lover refuse treatment.

“Really!” Bob retorted loudly.

He stared at Sasha’s hurt face. She was so filled with pain and panic and confusion. He didn’t want to make that any worse but he was about to. He had no choice but to do that to keep them all safe. Bob rolled down his shirt off his right shoulder revealing a fresh bite. He looked back at Sasha. She was stunned. She was frozen in place with her mouth agape in shock and horror. Bob had been bitten. Her lover had been bitten and there was nothing that could be done.

“It happened at the food bank.” Bob explained, looking back at all the confused faces.

The group fell into a morbid silence at the realisation that their friend was going to die. Bob and Sasha began quietly crying together. This would be their final night together and they weren’t ready for it. Bob suddenly collapsed back, the pain and the stress making him temporarily lose consciousness.

“There’s a sofa in my office.” Gabriel spoke up. “I know it’s not much but…”

“Thank you.” Sasha replied gratefully.

“I got it.” Tyreese announced, standing up and moving over to Bob to lift him.

Rick shifted over to Gabriel. They had to take care of the Termites as soon as possible if they wanted to survive.

“Do you know the place Bob was talking about?” Rick asked, intensity in his eyes.

“It’s an elementary school.” Gabriel answered. “It’s close.”

“How close?” Rick asked quickly, they needed to know and Gabriel looked nervous. “How close, Gabriel?”

“It’s just a ten minute walk through the woods from here due south of the graveyard.” Gabriel explained.

Jason considered the situation that was unfolding around them. The Termites were back and they were only a ten minute walk away from where they slept. From where Judith slept. From where Carl slept. The threat had to be dealt with and everyone had to be kept safe in the process.

“Carl, take Judith and go into the office.” Jason told him, working out a plan.

“Why?” Carl asked. They all had guns, they were safe where they were.

“Because all it takes is for them to kick open those doors and start shooting.” Jason answered, considering the worst case scenario. “Judith could get hit. _You_ could get hit. Hide in the office, it’s safer.”

Carl accepted the explanation and picked up Judith’s basket. The baby started to cry after her sleep had been disturbed by all the commotion. Carl tried to sooth her but was more focused on getting her into the office with Bob. Jason remained out in the hall.

“Does he have a fever?” Rick asked Maggie, who had just checked on the unconscious Bob.

“He’s just warm.” Maggie answered, not sure how long he would last.

“Jim lasted almost two days before we left him.” Glenn added. The problem with bites is that the death and reanimation speed varied wildly.

“Time for a reality check!” Abraham declared. “We all need to leave for DC. Right now!”

“Daryl and Carol are gonna be back.” Rick countered. “We’re not going anywhere without them.”

“I respect that but there is a clear threat to Eugene here. I need to extract his ass before things get any uglier.” Abraham explained. “So if you all won’t come, good luck to you. We’ll go our separate ways.”

Abraham turned and marched towards the door. It would be dangerous to go out there not knowing where the Termites were lurking.

“You going on foot?” Rick challenged.

“We fixed that damn bus ourselves.” Abraham answered, turning to face him.

“There are a lot more of us.” Rick responded, walking up the soldier.

“You wanna keep it that way? You should come.” Abraham retorted.

“Carol saved your life, we saved your life!” Rick snarled. He couldn’t believe the lack of loyalty.

“And I am trying to save yours!” Abraham bellowed back impatiently. “Save everyone’s!”

“We’re not going anywhere without our people.” Rick defended decisively.

“Your people took off!” Abraham spat.

“They’re coming back!” Rick spat back angrily.

“To what?! Picked over bones?!” Abraham shouted back.

Rick tried to grab Abraham’s arm. “You’re not…!”

Abraham knocked Rick’s arm away from his own. “Do not lay hands!” He bellowed aggressively.

“Abraham!” Rosita called to the muscular man. She knew his short fuse often got the better of him.

“Hey! Hey! Stop now!” Glenn shouted, getting in between the two alpha males. “Do you really think you’re going to be any safer leaving right now? In the middle of the night?”

“Yeah. Yeah.” Abraham answered.

“What about tomorrow? We need each other for this!” Glenn pleaded. “We need each other to get to DC! We can get through all of it together!”

“I have an idea.” Tara told them, stepping up. “If you stay just one more day and help, I’ll go with you to DC. No matter what.”

“Glenn and Maggie too.” Abraham declared. He knew them best and trusted them.

“No.” Rick growled.

“Good luck then. I’m not interested in breaking up what you have here.” Abraham answered. “Rosita, grab your gear.”

“Abraham…” Rosita started.

“Now!” Abraham barked. “Eugene, let’s go!”

Eugene didn’t budge from the pew he was sitting on.

“Eugene. Move it!” Abraham barked.

“I don’t want to.” Eugene answered hesitantly.

“Now!” Abraham growled.

“Kay.” Eugene whispered in defeat and stood up.

Jason hobbled over to them, gritting his teeth in irritation. He understood that Abraham had his mission but he was deliberately making everyone weaker and by doing so was jeopardising Carl’s safety and potential future. His speech at dinner had given them hope, a plan. He was pushing them away from it.

“You know what? You’re a fucking idiot if you think going out there right now is a good idea!” Jason called out aggressively.

“It’s a damn sight better than staying here!” Abraham barked back.

“Those people could be right outside the front door. You could be marching into a fucking bullet storm.” Jason hissed back, continuing his approach.

“If we stay here they can surround us.” Abraham argued. “I’m not about to be a goddamned sitting duck!”

“We have twice as many able bodied people as they do!” Jason barked back. “And we can bottleneck them in here!”

“Or we get slaughtered!” Abraham bellowed. “This ain’t some fucking movie!”

“And you’re not much of a soldier!” Jason countered aggressively.

Abraham lowered his rifle and took a couple steps towards Jason. He was not about to take that sort of insult from some young punk. Before he could reach the young man, Glenn stood between them and placed a hand on Abraham’s chest to stop him. He glared down at Glenn and to Rick, who stood with his hand on the handle of his Colt Python. Things were about to get violent.

Abraham snarled and stepped back. “We’re leaving.”

Rosita and Eugene headed for the door as Abraham followed behind them. Rick glared at them as they made their way down the church hall.

“You’re not taking the bus.” Rick said sternly.

Abraham stopped walking and turned sideways. “Try to stop me.”

Rick thought about it. That was obviously what it was going to take to stop them leaving. He was protecting his family, his children. He was not going to let Abraham’s arrogance put them in danger. He started walking towards Abraham. Abraham gave his gun to Rosita and marched towards the ex-sheriff.

“Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!” Glenn shouted and got between the two alpha males again.

He turned to Abraham. “You stay. You stay and help us and we will go with you.”

“No.” Rick argued. He didn’t want his people splitting up.

“It’s not your call.” Glenn retorted.

Glenn turned back to Abraham. “You stay. You help us.”

Abraham thought for a moment before nodding. “Half a day. Come high noon we’re tail lights. I’m not waiting for the other damn shoe to drop.”

“Then we will leave with you.” Maggie added.

Abraham nodded as silence fell around them. “Twelve hours then we go.”

Abraham picked up his rifle and walked away from the door. He walked past Rick and stopped as he reached Jason.

“Ever speak to me like that again and I’ll break your jaw.” He growled, not forgetting the offence caused.

“Then don’t give me a reason to.” Jason growled back. He wasn’t about to back down to anyone, not even Abraham.

 

Bob lay on the sofa in Gabriel’s office while Sasha cleaned up his burst lip.

“You know the one good thing about getting kicked in my face?” Bob asked weakly. “Made me forget the pain in my leg and my side so two good things.”

“We’re not playing that game anymore.” Sasha answered. She didn’t want to come to terms with Bob’s approaching death.

“Well, all things considered I figured you could humour me a little bit.” Bob answered with a weak smile.

Sasha looked at the floor. “Why didn’t you tell me when it happened?”

“I knew that when I told you it would become all about the end.” Bob answered, holding her hand. “And I really liked the middle.”

Sasha couldn’t help but cry which in turn caused Bob to cry. Bob squeezed her hand before she gently rested her head on his chest. His time was running out.

 

Jason rested his back against the wall of the other side room, dropping his bag to the floor. He had left the office along with Carl in order to give Sasha and Bob some time alone while the rest of the group planned out how to deal with the Termites. He couldn’t help but feel the sting of tears in his eyes and quickly wiped them away, breathing deeply to keep his emotions under control. He closed his eyes as he took his breaths and opened them when he felt a hand squeeze his own.

Jason opened his eyes and realised it was Carl who was holding his hand. Carl’s expression was one of curiosity and concern. It was obvious he wanted to ask Jason what was wrong but at the same time didn’t want to speak in case he upset the older teen any more than he already was.

“Sorry. Seeing Bob and Sasha like that…It reminds me too much of Kellin…” Jason’s lip quivered upon the mention of the name so he looked away.

Jason looked back when he felt Carl’s arms wrap around him. He instinctively wrapped his own arms around the smaller boy’s form and rubbed the back of his head, stroking his hair with one hand while rubbing his back with the other.

“I can’t bear the thought of that happening to you.” Jason continued, holding Carl tighter. “I’ll do whatever it takes to keep you alive and safe.”

Carl hugged Jason tighter but moved his head to look up at the older teen.

“That won’t happen.” Carl answered. “We’ll keep each other safe.”

Jason smiled weakly at Carl’s innocent confidence. It wasn’t a hope or a promise. It was a statement. He wouldn’t let anything happen because he didn’t want to lose what they had. Jason lowered his head and kissed Carl softly. It was a gentle kiss of acceptance that quickly was returned by Carl. The kiss slowly deepened into a more loving, passionate lip lock before they separated. Jason pulled him close again and rubbed his back. He wouldn’t let anyone harm Carl or let anyone break them apart.

 

Rick stood at the front of the church hall with the rest of the group. He had formed a plan that he was sure would work. As Jason had rightfully pointed out earlier, there were more of them than there were Termites. They could surround and kill them with little difficulty as they wouldn’t expect the group to know where they were hiding.

“They think they’re in control.” Rick explained. “We’re in here and they could be anywhere but we know exactly where they are.”

Everyone was busy reloading and checking their weapons.

“Plan’s got stones, I’ll give you that.” Abraham commented.

“Make our move before they do.” Glenn confirmed.

“That’s right.” Rick nodded. “They’re not counting on us thinking straight.”

“Are we?” Rosita challenged. “I’m just making sure because it’s a big play.”

Rick walked up to her from where he was, tilting his head as he stared at her. They needed to be strong. They needed to have conviction. There was no room for doubt.

“Remember what these people are capable of.” Rick reminded her.

“I’m coming too.” Jason’s voice sounded from the office door as he checked his gun was loaded.

Rick turned to him. “No.”

Jason hobbled over with a confused look on his face.

“You need all the help you can get with this.” He argued.

“Yeah.” Rick answered with a nod, squaring up to the younger man. “That’s why I need you here. Help keep everyone else safe.”

“I’d listen if I were you.” Abraham interjected. “No point losing your life trying to play the hero.”

Jason gave Abraham a narrow eyed glare but under Rick’s cold, uncompromising and decisive gaze he relented. There was no way Rick was going to let him walk through those church doors and he knew that. He sighed and nodded.

Rick looked over at Tyreese who was staring at the floor a small distance away from them.

“Tyreese?” Rick called.

“Yeah.” Came the short response.

“You up for this?” Rick asked him.

Tyreese thought about it. He was a peaceful man. He detested violence and would only kill walkers if he had no other choice. To strategically go out, surround and slaughter a group of living people was almost too much for him to stand. He understood they were horrible people, cannibals who would kill indiscriminately but he refused to let go of his humanity.

“I’m going with you.” Sasha declared, coming out of the office from behind Jason.

“You should stay with Bob.” Tyreese told his younger sister.

“No.” Sasha shook her head. “I wanna be out there. I wanna be a part of this.”

Sasha disappeared back into the office but was followed by Tyreese. She sat down at Bob’s bedside and admired his sleeping face. Her first love since the world ended was about to be taken from her. She didn’t think she’d love anyone else after him either.

“I know how it feels but this right here, time you could have with him, you can’t throw that away.” Tyreese told her with a shake of his head. “I wish I had it with Karen.”

“Do you remember how you felt, what you wanted to do?” Sasha challenged.

When Tyreese had discovered Karen’s burnt corpse in the prison, he had flown completely off the handle. He wanted to find the person who did it so he could beat them to death.

“Yeah. It made it so I couldn’t see it.” Tyreese answered with a nod. “Forgiveness. That’s facing it.”

“I should forgive them? For hurting him? For trying to kill us?” Sasha asked incredulously. “The hell is wrong with you? You think we have a choice?”

“Not all of us. Just you.” Tyreese answered. “When he opens his eyes the only thing he’s going to want to see is your face.”

Sasha stood up and handed Tyreese her knife.

“Take it.” Sasha told him, placing it in his hand. “If he stops breathing you put it through his temple. That’s what Bob would want.”

With that said, Sasha walked past her older brother, leaving him in the office with Bob and the others, while she joined Rick, Abraham, Michonne, Maggie, Glenn and Tara to go and take care of the Termites.

 

Tyreese, Gabriel, Eugene, Rosita, Judith, Carl, and Jason remained in the office with the door locked. Bob was still asleep on the sofa. They hoped the others would return sooner rather than later with the good news that the Termites had been executed and the threat had been eliminated. They expected to be waiting for about half an hour as they all knew Rick wouldn’t hesitate to slaughter all of them once they came across them.

The church was silent. The church was wrapped in darkness. All they could do was sit and wait. Fortunately Judith was sleeping and Bob was still breathing so they didn’t have any problems or potential dangers. Everyone was wrapped up in their own thoughts. Jason noticed how distant Carl’s mind was.

“Hey.” He whispered. “Why don’t I let you read more of my diary while we wait?”

Carl smiled and nodded. Despite the serious situation they were in, a bit of reading to pass the time wouldn’t go amiss. It would also keep him awake and stimulated. Jason smiled and looked around for his bag but quickly realised it wasn’t in the office. He recalled that he had gone into the side room to give Bob and Sasha some space and had dropped it to the floor. Jason had forgotten about it after being intimate with Carl and hearing Rick’s plans.

He stood up and unlocked the door to the office, earning a questioning hiss from Rosita.

“I’m just getting my bag from the other room.” Jason explained, opening the door. “Nothing is going to happen in the next thirty seconds anyway.”

Rosita relented and let him leave. He closed the door behind him and headed across the church hall to the other side room. Jason opened the door and closed it over behind him while his eyes scanned the floor. He spotted his bag and picked it up.

That’s when he heard it. The unmistakable sound of wood splintering as the front door of the church was broken down. His blood ran cold. This either meant that Rick and the others had somehow been killed or the Termites had slipped past them. He quickly locked the door and prayed the others did the same. He took out his gun and flicked the safety off, aiming at the door.

In the office, the others also heard the door break open. Carl flicked the safety off his gun and aimed at the door. Rosita prepared her shotgun. Gabriel clung to his cross necklace and silently prayed for help. Carl didn’t like that Jason was now separated from them. He hoped Jason had the sense to stay in the side room and keep quiet. This was not the time for heroics from anyone.

“Well, I guess you know we’re here.” Gareth’s voice called out from the church hall. “And we know you’re here.”

Jason grit his teeth from inside the side room. What had happened to Rick and the others for these Termites to get to the church so quickly? They were sitting ducks in these side rooms, they were practically defenceless and they were blinded by the doors.

“And we’re armed. So there’s really no point in hiding anymore.” Gareth continued to call out. “We’ve been watching you.”

The sound of the floorboards creaking told the others that the armed men were moving and roughly where they were. A group of six inside the small church felt like an army had marched in.

“We know who’s here. There’s Bob, unless you put him out of his misery already.” Gareth called out. “Then Eugene, Rosita, Martin’s good friend Tyreese.”

Jason thought for a moment. Was that the same Termite that Tyreese had claimed to have killed for threatening Judith? He hadn’t killed him? Jason understood that the man had his morals but to not kill that bastard and lie to the group was a big mistake. The animal who threatened a defenceless baby was in the church with them because Tyreese couldn’t swallow his moral authority. Jason growled at the lack of forethought.

“Carl, Jason and Judith.” Gareth finished.

Carl tightened the grip on his gun. He would not let these men harm his baby sister. He had already lost her once at the prison and he was not about to lose her again. Carl didn’t care what it took. These men would have to get through him to get to Judith.

“Rick and the rest walked out with a lot of your guns.” Gareth continued. “Listen, we don’t know where you all are but this isn’t a big place.”

In the office, Gabriel was shaking with fear. He had heard the others talk about this group and Bob’s leg was proof of what he had been told. There were devils in his church and he was powerless to stop them.

“So let’s just stop this now before things get more painful than they need to be.” Gareth continued calmly.

The Termite group split apart with two of them going to the office door and another one going to the side room door. Both doors were locked, rattling as they tried to open them. Carl and Rosita aimed at the office door. Jason aimed at the side room door. They were running out of time.

“Look, we know you’re behind one of these two doors and we have enough fire power to take down both.” Gareth called out, growing impatient. “Can’t imagine that’s what you all want.”

The sound of a shotgun being cocked echoed in the church hall.

“How about the priest? Father, if you help us wrap this up we’ll let you walk away from this.” Gareth attempted to trick the man. “Just open the door and go, you can take the baby with you.”

Gabriel to his credit did not budge from where he crouched in the office. Carl continued to aim at the door, ready for what was next.

“What do you say?” Gareth pleaded.

From the proximity of Gareth’s voice, Jason could tell he was standing behind the side room door. At least if things got violent he could kill Gareth. He’d be happy with that. He heard the man move. Gareth was preparing to break down the door. This was his chance.

Suddenly, Judith woke up and started crying loudly. Carl scrambled to keep her quiet but it was too late. She had revealed their location. Jason cursed under his breath upon hearing Judith’s cries.

“I don’t know, maybe we’ll keep the kid. I’m starting to like this girl.” Gareth commented as they all advanced for the office door.

The Termites were now aiming their guns at the office door, all of them locked and loaded.

“This is your last chance to tell us you’re coming out!” Gareth called out one last time.

Jason growled quietly. All those guns were now pointing at the office door. He knew they would be. That meant all those guns were pointing at Carl. He wasn’t about to let them kill him. Rick had trusted him to stay behind and keep everyone safe. That was exactly what he was going to do.

Jason unlocked the door and stepped out into the hall with his gun raised. The Termites turned to him with all their guns raised as Gareth smiled victoriously.

“Jason! How’s the leg?” He asked sadistically.

Jason took a strong step forward, hiding the pain that shot through his leg and kept his gun aimed at Gareth’s head. He didn’t answer.

“I get it. Trying to be the hero?” Gareth taunted him. “Heroes die. Besides, you can’t honestly expect to kill all of us.”

Carl felt panic surge through him. Jason was out in the hall with those monsters and he couldn’t figure out why. Was he trying to save them all by throwing his own life away? That’s when it hit Carl, his blood running cold. Jason had mentioned that he had been on the search for a good death. Had he found it? Die fighting the Termites in order to protect everyone else? To protect Carl? He couldn’t allow it. Carl’s hands started shaking, struggling to keep the gun steady. He wanted to do something but his feet felt like blocks of cement.

“Maybe not but killing you will make my fucking night.” Jason finally spat back, sweat rolling down his face.

Gareth’s smirk fell from his face and raised his hand to his group. The men seemed to understand as they aimed at the office door.

“If you make one move, we’ll blast that door down and kill everyone inside.” Gareth told him.

Jason wanted to move on reflex but he held himself still somehow. He grit his teeth and growled audibly at Gareth. Typical of the sadistic leader to hold everyone else hostage. He should have expected it.

“Lower your weapon and we’ll let you walk away.” Gareth offered. “You don’t want to die.”

Jason didn’t lower his gun. He was not going to leave Carl to these people. He was never going to leave Carl.

“I’m being generous, Jason. I’m trying to be nice.” Gareth continued. “You really ought to show some appreciation.”

Jason swallowed nervously. He knew there was no way he would let Carl die. He also knew he was running out of time as Gareth was losing his patience. Perhaps gunfire would alert Rick and the others if they were still alive and close by. Perhaps it would attract a herd that would get the Termites. Gareth was their unquestionable leader. Jason kept his gun aimed at Gareth’s head.

On his death bed, Kellin had made Jason promise to stay alive. To not attempt suicide and to not throw his life away for nothing. He had promised to be strong and live. He had also promised that he could only lose his life if it was a worthwhile, meaningful death. Jason hadn’t cared for anyone since Kellin’s death until he met Carl. Something had clicked between them, bringing part of Jason back to life that he had previously thought had died with Kellin. He had promised to keep Carl safe and he was not going to break that promise. He would give his life in the hopes that it would give Carl a second chance.

“ _Carl, please forgive me._ ” He whispered and prepared to pull the trigger.

Suddenly the heads of the men standing at the office door exploded and splattered blood on the wall as their bodies fell to the ground. A silenced gun had been used to shoot them. Jason, Gareth and the remaining Termites turned to face the doors.

“Put your guns on the floor.” Rick’s ice cold voice came from the darkness.

“We’re prepared to fire right into that office so you lower your guns!” Gareth demanded.

Another shot rang out and two of Gareth’s fingers were blown off by the bullet, causing him to cry out in pain and clutch his bleeding hand.

Rick emerged from the darkness with a silenced gun aimed at them.

“Put your guns on the floor and kneel.” Rick ordered them with an icy tone.

The one known as Martin refused to do as he was told. He continued to stand.

“Do as he says!” Gareth demanded from his agonised position on the floor.

The other Termites lowered their weapons except for Martin.

“Martin, there’s no choice here!” Gareth told him desperately.

“Yeah there is.” Martin answered, almost nonchalant.

Jason growled at the man’s arrogance and stepped forward, placing a gun to the man’s temple just as Abraham also approached from the darkness and aimed at him. The rest of Rick’s group emerged from the darkness with their weapons drawn.

“Wanna bet?” Abraham growled to Martin.

Martin finally dropped his gun and kneeled on the floor. Jason stood over him, keeping his gun aimed at his head.

Rick stood over Gareth as Sasha pulled his gun away from him.

“No point in begging, right?” Gareth had accepted defeat, staring up at Rick’s cold glare.

“No.” Rick answered.

“Still, you could have killed us when you came in there had to be a reason for that.” Gareth pointed out, hoping Rick was going to show some degree of mercy.

“We didn’t want to waste the bullets.” Rick answered bluntly.

Jason understood what Rick was planning. He could tell Gareth hadn’t quite caught on.

“We used to help people. We saved people! Things changed, they came in and…” Gareth gasped from the pain shooting through his hand. “And after that? I know that you’ve been out there but I can see it. You don’t know what it is to be hungry!”

Rick didn’t answer.

“You don’t have to do this we can walk away.” Gareth pleaded for mercy. “And we will never cross paths again, I promise you.”

“But you’d cross someone’s path. You’d do this to anyone, right?” Rick answered coldly. “Besides, I already made you a promise.”

Rick holstered his gun and pulled out his machete with the red handle and hacked into Gareth who desperately screamed for his life. Rick continued to violently hack into him repeatedly. Michonne started beating to death another Termite as did Abraham.

Jason glared at Martin’s puffed up face in disgust. The man who had threatened to kill Carl’s baby sister. He pulled out his own machete and started hacking into him with speed and ferocity. The first strike split his head open, the second sliced it into two halves. The third slammed into his neck. The fourth into his chest. The fifth in the chest. The sixth in the chest. Blood splattered everywhere. His arm burned from exertion. His energy fuelled by adrenaline. He was doing what Tyreese should have done. He was making sure this man, this monster, this vile disgusting creature never laid hands on Judith or Carl ever again.

The sounds of the blows, of slicing and the horrific screams echoed against the walls of the church as the rest of the group looked on in shock. It was one of the most violent displays they had ever seen and it was their group that was doing it. Eventually the screams came to a stop. The blows slowed down and stopped. All the Termites were dead.

Two dead bodies lay with bullet holes in their heads by the now open office door. Another two at the sides of the pews where Michonne and Abraham had smashed in their skulls. Gareth lay in the centre, his body ripped open into slices by Rick’s machete. Martin’s upper body had been reduced to crunchy soup by Jason’s ferocious machete strikes. Blood covered the floor, their clothes and faces.

Michonne looked down at Martin’s backpack and noticed the handle of her sword sticking out. She grabbed the handle and pulled out the katana. She felt power surge through her. The joy of reuniting with an old friend forced a smile out of her. She had her sword back. Michonne was complete again.

“That could have been us.” Rick reminded them all with a growl.

Glenn and Tara were shocked. Their group was turning into something that they didn’t want to be. Rick was turning into something they didn’t want him to be.

Father Gabriel stepped out of the office timidly. He took in the nauseous sight of the hacked up bodies and all the blood on the floor, soaking into the fabric of the rug that ran up the centre of the hall.

“This is the Lord’s house.” He stated in shock.

“No. It’s just four walls and a roof.” Maggie corrected him. She had lost her faith in such things.

Jason spat on Martin’s body and sheathed his machete.

“God’s house? We just did the Lord a favour.” He snarled at Gabriel. “They were monsters. They killed kids. They don’t deserve any of your pity.”

He walked past Gabriel towards the side room to get his bag. He needed to get the blood off his face. Jason couldn’t stand having such a monster’s blood on any part of him.

 

As Jason opened his bag to look for a cloth, he heard the door close behind him. He turned round slowly, cloth in hand. Just as he had expected, Carl stood in front of the closed door. He looked upset.

“You okay?” Jason asked, taking a step forward.

“What were you trying to do?” Carl spat out, referring to his confrontation with the Termites.

“Trying to save you.” Jason answered with a guilty sigh.

“By getting yourself shot? Do you even care at all?” Carl continued. “Am I not enough?”

Jason froze. Carl thought the whole performance had been from his desire to die. That he didn’t care enough about Carl to keep himself alive for the boy. He realised his mistake. He had been so focused on keeping Carl safe that all he had needed to do was stay in the room and be quiet. Rick would have arrived regardless.

“I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking.” Jason admitted, looking down at the floor.

“I saw the bodies. Did you do _that_?” Carl asked.

His emphasis on the last word meant he referred to the state of Martin’s body. Jason slowly nodded.

“He had threatened to kill Judith back at Terminus.” He explained, his hands were still covered in blood and shaking.

Carl understood. The over the top brutality of what Jason did had been because of Judith. That monster had tried to kill his baby sister and as a consequence, Jason hacked him up until he resembled soup.

Carl took a few steps forward and gently pushed Jason against the wall. He eased him down until he was sitting on the floor with his back against the wall. Carl took the cloth from his shaking hand and poured some water on it before dabbing Jason’s face. He took it upon himself to clean Jason’s face of the blood that had splattered over it. Jason’s eyes scared him. He was miles away. He could tell Jason wasn’t a truly violent guy. He wasn’t a killer by choice but by necessity. He remembered that his dad used to get into a similar state.

“Jason?” Carl asked, trying to get some kind of response.

Jason didn’t answer. He was still staring into space.

Carl finished cleaning Jason’s face and made sure to give his lips an extra clean before he put the cloth down. He was kneeling between Jason’s spread out legs. He leaned forward and tentatively planted a kiss on Jason’s lips. There was still no response. He kissed Jason again. This time Jason kissed back gently. They broke apart.

“Sorry. Don’t like you seeing that side of me.” He finally spoke with a rasp.

“It’s okay.” Carl answered. “It keeps us safe.”

Carl leaned forward again and their lips met for the third time. Jason raised his arms and pulled Carl close to him, deepening the kiss. They were alive. They had survived the Termite’s onslaught and no one had been lost in the fight. It was a victory and the only way he felt like celebrating was by kissing Carl to remind himself that the teen was still with him.

They broke apart again and Jason licked his lips slowly. He felt like doing more. He wanted to kiss Carl’s neck to find out if it was sensitive. He wanted to feel more of his body. Jason wanted to take all the pain and fear away even if it was only for an hour or so. He wanted to replace it all with love and pleasure. Carl caught his stare and blushed lightly under the heavy gaze he was receiving.

“What?” He asked confused.

Jason continued to admire Carl. He could see the pain that always sat in the back of his eyes. He wanted to set those eyes alight with pleasure, with happiness, with ecstasy. He remembered where he was and where Rick was. He couldn’t. No matter how much he wanted to. No matter how much he yearned to pull Carl close and do all sorts of wonderful things to him.

“You look tired.” Jason finally answered. Tired was the last word he wanted to use.

Carl yawned, covering his mouth on reflex and smiled.

“I guess I am.” He answered.

Jason pulled the younger teen closer to him and got him to sit down. He turned Carl around until Carl’s back was against his chest. He wrapped his arms around Carl and rubbed his tummy and chest as gently as he could.

“Let’s sleep then.” Jason told him, kissing the back of his head.

“Like this?” Carl questioned.

“Why not?” Jason shrugged. He was comfortable and Carl was too.

“What if someone sees?” Carl asked, remembering Jason’s caution.

“I really don’t care right now.” Jason chuckled lightly in his head.

No more words were spoken. They fell asleep like that. Carl resting between Jason’s legs as Jason’s hands gently caressed his front. They had been through a lot for one night and it was finally over. They were safe again. They were together.   

 

_Jason and Kellin lay on Jason’s bed together. They lay on top of the covers, shoes and shirts off but jeans and socks still on. Jason lay on his side behind Kellin with his arms around him, spooning him and rubbing his chest and stomach softly. His other hand softly played with Kellin’s hair, keeping it out of his boyfriend’s eyes._

_“Fuck them. Fuck the lot of them.” Jason told him, kissing his ear softly._

_“They’re still my family.” Kellin muttered back. His eyes were stained with tears. “It hurts.”_

_“Not if they treat you like that.” Jason answered, leaving a kiss on his shoulder._

_“They disowned me, Jason! They told me to leave and never come back!” Kellin sobbed out, his body shaking. “That I was disgusting, a disgrace to the family!”_

_Jason whispered words and sounds of comfort in Kellin’s ear as he pulled him closer against his body. He kissed Kellin’s cheek and continued to rub his chest softly._

_“Then leave them. They don’t deserve you.” Jason answered calmly._

_“Where would I go?” Kellin asked desperately. “I have no options!”_

_“You do have somewhere to go.” Jason whispered into his ear, kissing it gently._

_“Where?” Kellin asked, too upset to follow Jason’s thoughts._

_“You’re lying in your new bed, in your new home.” Jason answered, turning Kellin over to stare into his eyes._

_Tears were still fresh in Kellin’s eyes. “I can’t stay with you.”_

_Jason kissed his forehead. “Sure you can. Get your things and live here.”_

_Kellin started to cry again but this time out of relief, out of love. He had a boyfriend who cared about him and loved him so much that he was willing to take him in after his family kicked him out. He knew he had found the one for him. The only person he could ever love was leaning over him with a soft but loving smile on his face. Moving in with Jason would be a dream come true but it would also mean going back home for his belongings._

_“I don’t think I can go back there.” Kellin rasped in pain and fear._

_“You won’t be going alone.” Jason answered sternly. “I’m going with you.”_

_“But what if they say something?” Kellin asked, worried about everything going wrong._

_“Then I’ll shut them up.” Jason declared confidently. “They can pick on someone who’s not afraid, see what happens.”_

_Kellin couldn’t help but smile as he cried. Jason was going to be his guardian angel through all of it. He showed no fear, if Kellin’s father got violent then Jason was willing to lay him out flat on the floor for it. Jason was confident. He was proud of their relationship._

_“I love you.” Kellin choked out, staring up at his lover._

_“I love you too.” Jason replied and brought their lips together._

Jason awoke to sounds in the church hall. The others must have woken up and were having breakfast. He looked down and found Carl still between his legs, his head resting on Jason’s shoulder with Jason’s leather jacket wrapped around him like a duvet. He knew they had probably been spotted by someone but after the previous night’s events he didn’t care.

He gently shook Carl awake, the boy’s eyes fluttering open before looking up at Jason who kissed him on the forehead.

“Morning.” Jason greeted.

“Morning.” Carl replied with a smile.

Jason listened out for the sound of plates but couldn’t hear them. That’s when he remembered that Bob had been bitten the day before. The silence could mean he had already passed away or he was close to death.

“Let’s check on the others.” He commented and stood up, putting his jacket back on.

They left the side room together and saw that everyone was heading into the office. Bob was on his death bed. They quickly joined the rest of them so they could say their goodbyes.

Over the following ten minutes the emotions in the room increased. Tears were staining eyes more and more as each individual got to say their goodbye to Bob. This included Carl and Jason. Bob had been a very positive and entertaining man and yet again a bright light was about to go out.

Maggie was by Bob’s side. “You’ll always be with us, always be a part of us.”

She kissed his hand. She was the last one to say goodbye. The group started to walk out of the office so that Sasha could have her final moments with Bob. After that she would stab him in the head to prevent animation so that they could bury him with the dignity he deserved.

“Rick.” Bob called weakly.

Rick turned and realised Bob wanted a word. He went to hand Judith to Carl.

“No, don’t. Let her stay.” Bob stopped him. “I trust her.”

Rick nodded and headed for the sofa. Jason placed a hand on Carl’s shoulder and gently guided him out of the office. It hurt him to see someone else go through what happened to Kellin but at least Sasha wasn’t alone. There was more comfort and dignity to Bob’s passing.

“I’ll be right outside.” Sasha told him, leaving the office as well.

Rick stood over Bob, holding Judith in his arms.

“I just want to say thank you.” Bob told him with a weak smile.

“For what?” Rick asked, somewhat confused.

“Before the prison, I didn’t know if there were any good people left.” Bob explained softly. “I didn’t know if anybody was left.”

Rick sat on the sofa as Bob spoke.

“You took me in because you took people in.” Bob continued. “It was you, man.”

Bob held his hand out and Rick took it in his own.

“What I said yesterday, I ain’t revising it. Even in light of current events.” Bob told him, struggling to speak. “Nightmares end but they shouldn’t end who you are. And that is just this dead man’s opinion.”

Rick nodded and smiled faintly, finding it difficult to smile at all. “I’ll take it.”

Bob grinned. “Just look at her and tell me the world isn’t going to change.”

Bob was right and Rick knew it. Judith was the perfect symbol of hope in all the fear. She was the perfect symbol of light in the darkness.

Rick stood up and gave Bob a final goodbye before leaving the office, allowing Sasha to spend some final moments with her lover. When she sat down Bob was unconscious again but still breathing so she waited.

Five minutes later Bob finally woke again.

“You were out.” Sasha told him.

“Was I?” Bob smiled.

“You were.” Sasha answered softly. “Why are you smiling?”

“I think I was dreaming and I think you were smiling back at me in the dream.” Bob replied, still smiling.

Sasha smiled back at the comment. Even on death’s door he was charming.

“Yeah, that’s it.” Bob commented, still smiling.

“So what is it? The good that comes out of this bad?” Sasha asked him, both referencing their game and asking him sincerely.

Bob didn’t answer. His eyes remained closed and his smile slowly faded from his face. His chest stopped moving. He was finally gone.

“Bob?” Sasha called, her lip quivering and voice shaking.

She placed a hand on his chest but felt no movements or beats from his heart. “Bob?”

She removed her hand from him and placed both her hands together, resting her forehead against them as she cried. It was over. Unfortunately it wasn’t over as there was still one last thing that needed to be done. She had to prevent his reanimation. She pulled out her knife but realised she couldn’t find the strength to use it.

Tyreese came into the office and walked up to her. He knew it was over and he understood how difficult it was to put Bob down.

“Give it here.” Tyreese said, holding his hand out to take the knife.

Sasha felt the tears fall faster as she handed her older brother the knife. She kissed Bob’s hand and quickly made her way out of the office so that she could grieve. She didn’t need to see it.

Tyreese started to cry as he approached Bob’s body. Lying on the sofa wasn’t just a dead friend. It was his dead brother-in-law. Though Bob and Sasha had never formally got married, Tyreese saw Bob as family. He placed a hand on Bob’s forehead and drove the knife deep into his ear to prevent reanimation.

A few moments later, Tyreese emerged from the office with Bob’s body in his arms. He had wrapped him up in a white sheet and slowly walked past the others as he headed for the open church doors. Sasha followed him out with tears still running down her face.

Jason placed a hand on Carl’s shoulder, conscious of the others being able to see them.

“This is why I said no at first.” He explained. “I didn’t want to put you through that.”

“Do you regret being with Kellin because it ended that way?” Carl asked, looking back at him with sincerity.

Jason thought for a moment. Though Kellin’s death had been the most awful thing he had ever dealt with in his life. It was something that would haunt him forever. Was that one night bad enough to make him regret the three happiest years of his life? Absolutely not.

Jason shook his head. “No, I don’t.”

Carl didn’t say any more. He didn’t have to because his point had been made. It was about the here and now, that’s what mattered most because it was all they ever had.

Carl took Judith in his arms and followed the rest of the group outside. He and Jason stood on the front steps of the church while Sasha built a cross for Bob’s grave. Tyreese busied himself with digging the grave. In front of the church, the short bus was ready to go and so were Abraham, Rosita, Eugene, Glenn, Maggie and Tara as they had all agreed the night before.

Abraham handed Rick a folded up map. “This is our route to DC. We’ll stick to it as long as we’re able. If not, well, you’ve got our destination.”

Jason stood with Carl as he cradled Judith in his arms. He loved how affectionate Carl was, he was truly a great big brother.

“Once Eugene gets to the big brands up there things are going to bounce back.” Abraham explained. “This group should be there for it. You should be there for it.”

“They will be.” Maggie added.

“We will.” Michonne agreed.

“We will.” Rick repeated with a smile matched by Abraham’s own.

Abraham turned and headed for the bus. “Let’s go!”

Once they had all packed into the short bus the others joined Jason, Carl and Gabriel on the front steps of the church. They smiled and waved their goodbyes while Rick and Abraham shared a nod. The doors of the bus closed and it slowly drove off.

Rick opened the map to check their route and found a note written on the bottom.

“Sorry I was an asshole. Come to Washington. The new world’s gonna need Rick Grimes.”

As the rest of the group returned to the interior of the church, Rick headed over to help Tyreese bury the bodies. The Terminus members had also been wrapped up for burial upon Gabriel’s request. Despite the monsters they had been they were still people and deserved a burial, for the sake of the people they used to be if nothing else.

Rick picked up a shovel and started digging next to Tyreese. Unfortunately for both men, the digging of graves was a mastered art for them.

“I never asked how it was for you.” Rick spoke. “Getting to Terminus.”

Tyreese thought of Carol’s revelation, of Lizzie and Mika and the horrendous things he had bared witness to.

“It killed me.” Tyreese finally answered.

As they continued to dig, Rick thought about the answer Tyreese gave. This was a man who could still forgive people. He could still be peaceful, hold onto his morals and resist the temptation to kill. He hadn’t died inside yet.

“No. It didn’t.” Rick told him with a smile.

 

At the front of the church Jason, Carl and Michonne stayed outside for some fresh air. Jason noticed Michonne’s sword on her back again.

“So, you got your sword back.” Jason commented.

“Yeah. I didn’t miss it.” Michonne answered. “But I’m glad to have it back.”

“That means Carl can practice some more.” Jason reminded her.

Carl’s face lit up. He had forgotten about his sword training with Michonne. Upon seeing Carl’s excitement Michonne pulled out her sword and handed it to Jason.

“I’ll take Judith so you can practice some more.” She explained.

Carl grinned and handed Judith over to Michonne who cradled her with a mother’s expert hands. Jason handed Carl the sword and soon enough Carl was a safe distance away taking practice swings. Michonne would give him tips or correct his posture from time to time.

As Jason and Michonne sat on the church steps with Judith watching Carl practice, she took it as an opportunity to question Jason about Carl’s confession.

“So you’re together now, I hear?” She asked the young man.

Jason nodded with a nervous smile. “Yeah. It’s what Carl wanted.”

“Why are you nervous?” Michonne asked him. “What you have is a good thing.”

“Rick doesn’t know yet. I’m kinda scared.” Jason admitted.

“I understand.” Michonne answered. “But he’s a good man. He’ll appreciate honesty.”

Jason nodded. “What if he disapproves?”

“Why would he disapprove?” Michonne asked, trying to figure out Jason’s thoughts.

“The age difference.” Jason answered. “And that it could cause him heartbreak in this world.”

Michonne considered his answer for a moment. “What convinced you to say yes?”

“Carl told me that if he was old enough for all the bad things in this world, then he’s old enough for the good.” Jason explained. “And that he wants to experience the good because none of us know if we’ll survive tomorrow.”

Michonne smiled as she played with Judith, making the baby giggle.

“There’s your answer.” Michonne replied.

Jason watched as Carl continued to practice with the sword. For all the physical attraction there was. All the hunger. His connection ran deeper than that. There was an emotional bond between them. Carl and Kellin were two very similar yet very different people. Jason felt happy with Carl. Carl felt happy with Jason. That’s all that mattered.

“He’s my light in the darkness.” Jason told her with a smile.

 

**So there we go. Chapter 11 is finally done and the Termites have been squashed. The next chapter will be a custom storyline that I have come up with. That’s because episode 3 does away with an entire day so I figured something had to happen in that time.**

**I hope this chapter was up to expectations and I will try to get chapter 12 done as soon as possible. I will also soon be revealing all the Easter Eggs that have been hidden in the fanfiction so far.**

**Thanks for all the kudos/follows/favourites/bookmarks/subscriptions etc.**

**Thanks to the reviewers of Chapter 10: SaraP, RainbowO, DarkRavie, jar98, heavensentskysky, rk0192 and jlogan83.**

**A special mention for jlogan83 who informed me he had stayed up till 7am reading the story from start to finish. That’s one of the single best things anyone has ever said about one of my fanfics, so thank you.**

**Also, if you can, check out my Walking Dead Seasons 1-4 trailer on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vWPH82PDMcs**


	12. Evolution

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the death of the Termites, Jason decides it is time to talk to Rick about his relationship with Carl. Will Rick accept it? What will happen when a ghost from Jason's past comes back for revenge?   
> As an apology to my readers for the long wait, I have included a Christmas gift in the form of a lemon. You have been warned.

The sun shown down strongly upon the greenery of the area. The grass, flowers and trees bathed in its ultraviolet rays that fed them as they photosynthesized. The birds that nested upon the branches of the many trees sang their daily chorus as they continued their lives unaffected by the end of humanity. On a patch of grass across from the small church, Sasha sat by Bob’s recently dug grave as she mourned his passing. It was hard for her to process that he was gone. It didn’t feel real. Unfortunately it was very real. The greatest man she had ever been with was gone forever. She let her tears fall down her face and onto the grass below.

Closer to the entrance of the church in an open patch of grass, Carl continued to practice with Michonne’s katana. Michonne sat nearby, instructing him and correcting any mistakes he made. The self-taught samurai had to admit that Carl was a fast learner and was improving rapidly. A few more days of practice like this and testing his skills against walkers and he would be as good as her. It brought a smile to her face. She understood that Jason had reminded them of the training so it would take Carl’s mind off the horrors of the previous night and the death of Bob that morning. For the time being it appeared to be working.

Inside the church, Rick sat with Judith as he fed her. Ten minutes previous the youngest of the Grimes family had just about cried the church walls down as she called out for breakfast. Rick always savoured these moments with his daughter. Unlike the people and the world around him she was innocent. She was pure. It was something so unique and so rare he had to remind himself of it every day lest he forget what it is like. The ex-sheriff deputy knew that her innocence would not last very long. As she grew older she would be brought up to survive, to fight and to kill. It wasn’t an ideal future life for his daughter but it was better than death.

Jason emerged from the office where he had kept his backpack. He had just got done marking his tallies and was placing the bag on his shoulders as he closed the door. He grabbed a large plastic bottle that sat empty on the floor and made his way over to Gabriel who sat at his desk in silence, still horrified by the violence of the previous night. Jason placed his hand down on the desk to get the priest’s attention.

“Gabriel, is there a river or a lake close by?” The young man asked.

From the pews behind them, Rick raised his head in curiosity as he listened in on the conversation.

Father Gabriel nodded slowly and pulled out the map from his drawer. He spread it out on the table and placed his finger on the church.

“If you go out the doors and follow the road to the right.” Gabriel told him, dragging his finger down the path. “There’s a lake just through the trees. It’s a five minute walk from here.”

Rick placed Judith in her crib next to Tyreese who was cleaning some of the guns. He walked up to them with his hands in his jacket pockets.

“What’s going on?” He asked as he approached the two.

Jason held up the empty bottle as he turned to Rick with a small smile.

“We need more water.” Jason answered. “I was hoping you could come with me to get some.”

“Why don’t you ask Carl or Michonne?” Rick questioned. He knew Jason was more comfortable with them, especially Carl.

“They’re busy with Carl’s sword training.” Jason explained. “I don’t want to interrupt them.”

Rick nodded silently, accepting the explanation before looking to his left. He walked over and grabbed the Norinco Type 56 rifle that he had stolen at Terminus and put the strap over his shoulder. He checked the ammo for the rifle and for his trademark Colt Python revolver before holstering it.

Rick looked back at Jason. “Let’s go.”

As they made their way out of the church doors and down the steps, Michonne and Carl caught sight of them. It was clear from their body language that they were going somewhere which was strange as nothing had been said to her about a run.

“Going somewhere?” She asked the two as they walked past.

“Just going to get some more water.” Jason answered with a shrug as he held up the empty bottle. “We’re running low.”

“Can I come?” Carl asked, sheathing the sword. He wouldn’t mind spending more time with Jason after all the sword training.

Jason shook his head. “We’ll only be fifteen minutes. It’s not going to be anything exciting.”

Carl’s face fell momentarily. It wasn’t like Jason to say no. His rational side kicked in as he reminded himself that a fifteen minute run to get water wasn’t anything special nor would it require any effort. He’d rather spend the time with Jason doing other things and without his father around. Finally he nodded in acceptance.

With that, Jason waved them a temporary goodbye as he and Rick set off down the empty road that was littered with fallen leaves and rubbish. Jason couldn’t help but smile as they walked down the road. On either side were rows of trees which rustled in the wind and were the home to a variety of birds and other wildlife. Jason loved nature and he enjoyed being surrounded by it even if it brought the ever present threat of walkers. The other thing he loved about the post-apocalyptic world was the silence. Though he missed the sound of aeroplanes in the sky above them, he couldn’t help but enjoy the silence the end of the world had brought. Nothing but the sounds of nature echoed around them.

Jason noticed that not a word had been said between himself and Rick. He had been too wrapped up in observing his surroundings and Rick was constantly on the lookout for potential danger. The young man didn’t feel comfortable walking in silence with the group leader.

“Where do you think Carol and Daryl went?” Jason asked out of the blue, looking straight on.

Rick glanced at him before continuing to observe their surroundings for any approaching danger. He thought for a moment as it had been strange of the two of them to disappear like they had. They were two original members of the Atlanta group. They were family.

“They wouldn’t leave us.” Rick answered flatly. “Maybe they saw the people who took Beth.”

“Here’s hoping they bring her back safe.” Jason commented as the two men continued to walk.

Rick didn’t answer. He had his doubts. He knew better than to voice his doubts so as to not upset any of the others but the world was so dangerous, especially other people, that the chances of survival were probably slim wherever she was.

Jason noted that Rick appeared to be distant with him, reserved to some extent. He couldn’t figure out why. It was possible that Rick still didn’t trust him completely even though he was the one that had said Jason belonged in the group. He was sure that the bearded man wasn’t aware of his relationship with Carl for the mere fact that he was still breathing. Jason knew he had to tell Rick soon. He was Carl’s father. He deserved to know. Kellin and Jason had tried to be secretive with their relationship and that almost ended disastrously for Kellin. Jason refused to make the same mistake twice.

They were interrupted by their thoughts as a walker stumbled out of the woodland, rasping and growling at them as it approached with swinging arms. The dirty, blood covered trainers and ripped tracksuit told them something of who the man used to be. The walker’s stench filled their nostrils and repulsed the two men. It was something they could never get used to. The walker snarled as it got closer to Jason who pulled out his machete and with one swift vertical strike split the walker’s skull into two halves. The walker went still until he pulled out the blade allowing the body to collapse to the ground.

Jason wiped the blood off the blade with the walker’s tracksuit before sheathing it in his belt yet again. Looking through the woodland he saw the classic reflection of sunlight on water and realised that they had made it to the lake. He signalled to Rick and led the bearded man through the trees and bushes towards the water.

Once they had made it through the small patch of woodland they reached the bank of the lake. The water stretched out before them, reflecting the sky and the trees that surrounded it. The water was calm, clean and sparkled in the sunlight. It was a beautiful and peaceful place to be. A sudden splash signalled the jump of a fish. The lake had a fish population which would allow them to catch fish for food. The lake was looking more and more inviting by the minute.

Jason crouched down and sampled a handful of the water. He held it in his mouth, tasting it for any obvious contamination but failed to find any. The water was fresh. He smiled and drank another handful of water before splashing some on his face and hair to cool him down. Another thought crossed his mind. The lake would be a beautiful place to spend some time with Carl.

“You want to tell me why you brought me out here?” Rick asked abruptly, glaring at Jason.

Jason stared back, slightly confused by the question and intimidated by Rick’s glare.

“We need more water.”

“No, we don’t.” Rick shot back. “I checked this morning.”

Jason felt his legs go weak under the intensity of Rick’s glare. The bearded man had known all along that Jason had been lying to him and yet went along with it up until now. Rick’s perceptiveness scared Jason. The young man quickly reminded himself that this was still Rick, the man who appeared to appreciate him and did care about him. He wasn’t a monster. _Usually_.

Jason sighed in defeat and dropped his gaze to the ground for a moment. He needed to muster up the courage to be up front and honest with Rick. This was what he had planned all along and he couldn’t back out now, especially under Rick’s ever piercing glare.

“I wanted to talk to you about something.” Jason finally told him, looking up. “Away from the others.”

“So tell me.” Rick answered quickly.

Jason couldn’t tell if Rick’s hand was resting on the handle of his Colt Python out of habit or out of suspicion. The air between them felt tense and heavy. Despite the fact that they were standing in the shade, Jason felt like he was in an oven. Hot. Nervous. Sweat trickled down his face as he swallowed slowly. His hands shook with nerves and his knees felt like buckling under his weight. Somehow he held himself up.

“Carl…and I are…um….we…uh…we want to be together.” Jason stuttered out, trying his best to phrase it in an appropriate way.

Rick continued to glare at him as he processed the information. His expression was extremely difficult to read. It was as if he was studying Jason, looking for any faults or indications of lies.

“You want to be with Carl?” Rick finally asked, lowering his head and strengthening his glare. “You want to be with _my son_?”

“And he wants to be with me.” Jason answered. He needed to stress that it was what Carl wanted.

“He’s five years younger than you.” Rick hissed. The police officer inside him appeared to have been awakened.

“Are you saying he’s too young?” Jason asked. He had intended to sound strong but his voice came out uneven. His nerves were showing through.

“He’s fourteen. He’s still going through puberty.” Rick explained coldly. “You can’t be sure about what he thinks he wants.”

“He sounded pretty convinced to me, Rick.” Jason replied. He felt like he was walking a tightrope.

“How long have you had these feelings for?” Rick continued his interrogation.

Jason gazed back down at the floor. That was a difficult question. He couldn’t really put a specific date or time on it. His feelings had developed over time as Carl grew on him. It wasn’t something he honestly cared about. All he cared about was the present.

“A while now, but I honestly couldn’t say.” Jason answered as truthfully as he could.

Rick continued to study him with his unrelenting glare. It made Jason incredibly uncomfortable as he expected Rick to shoot him or hit him at any moment. He also wondered if he was about to be banished like Carol had been from the prison. That was the real reason he had grabbed his bag and the empty water bottle. At least he would have supplies.

“And you’re sure he wants this?” Rick asked after a few moments of silence. His voice was raspy. It scared Jason.

Jason nodded quickly. “We went at his pace. It was about what he wanted. I swear.”

Rick nodded for a moment. He appeared to believe Jason but he needed to be sure. His son had been through so much in the last couple years and the last horror he needed to be subjected to was any kind of sexual abuse. Rick wouldn’t tolerate that for a second.

“What have you done with him?” Rick asked. His tone was ice cold. He needed an answer.

Jason hesitated for a moment. The tone of Rick’s voice and the look on his face confirmed the meaning of the question. He was asking about anything sexual. Any intimate actions that he may or may not approve of. Jason remembered Rick’s warning about touching his son and what the result of that would be. He had stayed true to his word and hadn’t done anything sexual with Carl but he couldn’t deny the temptations had been there.

“We have only kissed so far.” Jason answered slowly and honestly. “Like I said, we go at his pace.”

“Why should I allow you to be with him?” Rick asked. It was a loaded question.

Jason’s nerves caused his body to shake more as a cold shiver ran down his spine. He knew this was the key question. This would be the make or break of his future with Carl. If he didn’t answer in a satisfactory manner then Rick would refuse to accept the relationship and would find a way to stop it. He hoped that if his answer was satisfactory, then Rick would accept the relationship.

“Carl has been through too much for a boy his age. Seeing people around him die almost daily, having to shoot his own mother.” Jason made his case. “Watching his father turn into a savage in order to keep him safe.”

Rick remained silent as Jason gained confidence and conviction as he continued his argument. Michonne had advised him to make Carl’s own words the answer to this question and he silently hoped that her wisdom was well placed.

“He has to live every day in a never ending nightmare with walking corpses and psychopaths.” Jason continued. “Fear dominates his life. Anger dominates his life. Tragedy dominates it.”

Rick weakened his glare slightly. What Jason was telling him was true. It was something that he couldn’t prevent despite all his best efforts. The world was a cruel place and no parent could protect their child from that.

“I’m the one thing he wants that brings him happiness, brings him joy and brings him pleasure.” Jason continued. “I can make him forget those feelings of fear and anger for a while. I can give him better things to feel, like love and appreciation. He needs this.”

“Either one of you could die.” Rick told him with pragmatism. “Is it worth the heartbreak?”

Jason felt a lump grow in his throat as he remembered Kellin. Despite his death ripping Jason’s heart to shreds, he wouldn’t trade all the good times to avoid the heartbreak. It was worth it. He knew it was.

“Death has always been a threat. Even before with disease, crime and accidents. Walkers aren’t any different.” Jason retorted confidently. “And if he dies, would it not be better for him to get to experience something good, something special before that rather than constant fear?”

The two men gazed into each other’s eyes. Jason had made his case as best he could and now awaited Rick’s judgement. Rick appeared to be taking a while to make his decision as he went over everything Jason had said. All his answers and the case he had made for the relationship to be permitted.

To Jason it felt like it had been an hour though he knew it had only been a minute at most before Rick finally nodded. The nod was slow but accepting as Rick came to his final decision.

“You have my permission on two conditions.” Rick stressed to cut off any early celebration.

Jason couldn’t help but smile. He knew there was more to it but ultimately he had Rick’s permission. He and Carl could be together.

“Name them.” Jason answered, his body now shaking with excitement rather than fear.

“You take your time, go at his pace.” Rick told him. “Don’t push him into doing anything. Ever.”

Jason nodded. “You have my word that I won’t.”

“Good. Carl is my son. If you hurt him I’ll kill you.” Rick threatened. This was the second condition.

“I won’t hurt him. I promise.” Jason answered and held out his hand.

Rick observed Jason’s gloved hand before grasping it with his own so they could shake hands as an act of respect. Jason couldn’t help but grin. Rick had accepted his relationship with Carl. This was the happiest he had been since the world had ended.

 

The walker snarled as it approached its prey. It raised its arms and stretched towards the person in an attempt to grab hold of their shoulders so it could bite their face or neck. Before it could get any closer, the blade of a sword cut through its neck and decapitated it with a single swipe. Its head dropped to the floor, the jaws still trying to bite as the body collapsed. The same sword was stabbed through its temple to end its second life.

Carl flicked the blood off the blade of the sword before sheathing it as Rick and Jason reappeared. Three other walker corpses littered the grass in front of the church as they had been used for Carl’s practical exam. Michonne’s grin showed that Carl had obviously passed with flying colours or in the case at hand, flying heads.

“That was longer than fifteen minutes.” Michonne told them as she took her sword back from Carl.

Rick nodded with his hands on his hips. “Yeah, we had a little chat.”

Michonne raised her eyebrows at this and glanced at Jason who nodded gently. Just as she had thought, Jason had taken the opportunity to tell Rick about his relationship with Carl. Given that Jason was still with them and unharmed appeared to be a good sign.

“Carl, I need to speak to you for a moment.” Rick told his son, beckoning him over.

Carl was a little confused but did as his father asked and followed him out of the hearing range of the others. He felt a little nervous. Was his dad about to tell him he couldn’t be with Jason?

Jason stood next to Michonne and placed the now full bottle of water on the ground by his feet. He folded his arms and smiled as he watched Carl follow Rick.

“You were right.” He told the samurai next to him.

“He approved?” Michonne asked to confirm.

Jason shrugged. Approved wasn’t the word he would have used. “We have his permission.”

Michonne couldn’t help but smile. She knew Carl needed someone to be close to and intimate with, especially with how dark and dangerous the world was. Rick had made the decision to allow his son the opportunity to have that person. He was a good man.

Rick placed a hand on Carl’s shoulder and stared into his son’s eyes. Looking at his son at that moment, now aware of what was going on with Jason made him realise how much Carl was growing up. He reminded Rick of Lori in many ways.

“Jason tells me that you’re together.” Rick began. “Is that true?”

Carl swallowed and nodded nervously. Although he had wanted to be open about his relationship with Jason, he now felt a similar to fear to what Jason had been feeling. All it would take would be for his father to disapprove and ruin it all.

“Is that what you want?” Rick asked his son. “He’s not forcing you?”

Carl shook his head. “No, dad. I like him. Really.”

Rick nodded slowly before preparing his final question. He needed to make sure Jason hadn’t lied to him at all in their discussion at the lake.

“What has he done with you?” Rick asked, hoping he wouldn’t need to go into detail.

Fortunately for the ex-sheriff deputy, his son understood the question. Carl’s face went red as he admitted to his father the intimacy he shared with Jason.

“We cuddle a lot and we’ve kissed a few times.” Carl told his father, looking down.

Rick nodded and smiled. Jason had been telling the truth. Respecting the young man’s honesty and the wishes of his own son he had no choice but to approve of their relationship. He waved for Jason to walk over and join them which the young man did without hesitation.

Rick placed a hand on each of their shoulders and moved his gaze between each pair of eyes that were staring back intently.

“If this is what you both want I won’t stop it.” Rick told them. His tone was serious despite the warmth in his eyes. “Promise me to take it slow and be safe. Keep each other safe.”

“I promise, Dad.” Carl told him, a grin forming on his lips.

“I promise, Mr. Grimes.” Jason answered, smiling but making an effort to be respectful.

Rick laughed lightly at how Jason had addressed him. “Rick’s fine.”

He stopped laughing and placed both his hands on Jason’s shoulders, staring into the younger man’s eyes with one final serious comment.

“Carl’s my only son.” Rick told him. “You better keep him safe when I’m not around.”

Jason nodded without speaking. There was no need for him to verbally answer as Rick knew that Jason would keep Carl safe. With that said, Rick removed his hands from Jason’s shoulders and patted Carl on the back before walking away from them. The couple watched the bearded group leader as he made his way back inside the church, presumably to spend time with Judith.

Jason took hold of Carl’s hand and squeezed it before pulling the younger teen into a strong hug. Carl wrapped his arms around Jason and pulled himself in closer, his hat being pushed out of place by Jason’s neck. They stood on the spot in their embrace for a couple minutes, letting themselves take in the good news of Rick’s acceptance.

Jason couldn’t believe that Rick had approved. Not only had his fears turned out to be unfounded but now he had a chance to be happy. Kellin had wanted him to find someone new in the event of his death and now Jason had. Carl could never fill the void left by Kellin but that didn’t matter because Carl had created his own spot in Jason’s heart that held equal importance. For six months Jason had been alone with all the skills to survive but without an actual reason to do so beyond his promise to Kellin. Now he had a reason to live. Now he had someone to live for.

Though Carl had more faith in his father accepting them, he was just as surprised and happy as Jason was. He had grown up in a way no child should ever have to. He understood that was why his mother always held him close and treated him like a child. It was because he should have been a child instead of another defender of the group, another adult. After two years of fear and the cold emotions of an accelerated maturation he could now feel something warm. Carl now had the opportunity to share something special with someone. It was a brand new experience to him and unlike all the other experiences of the post-apocalyptic world, it was an experience he looked forward to.

They finally broke apart allowing Jason to kiss Carl’s forehead quickly before smiling at him. Carl smiled back, no longer afraid to show their affection in front of Michonne or anyone else.

“If you give me a minute to put this water inside, there’s somewhere I want to take you.” Jason told the younger teen with a grin.

“Where?” Carl asked out of curiosity.

Jason continued to grin. “Not telling. You’ll see when we get there.”

Jason picked up the water bottle and headed back inside the church, leaving Carl and Michonne outside.

Once Jason was inside the church he headed over to the far side where they kept most of the supplies. He placed the water bottle next to the other bottles they had and looked over at the pews on the left side of the church. Tyreese was still cleaning out some of the guns while Rick was spending time with Judith, holding the baby in his large hands and bouncing her up and down on his knee as she laughed with innocent amusement. Jason almost felt bad about interrupting but he knew Rick trusted him now and he could feel a warmth about the man that hadn’t been there before.

“Hey, Rick? Is it okay if I take Carl to the lake for a while?” Jason asked the leader. “Figured he could use a change of scenery.”

Rick thought for a moment before nodding. “Take Michonne with you just in case.”

Jason nodded and made his way for the door. He couldn’t tell if Rick had said that out of genuine concern for walkers or to avoid anything intimate taking place between himself and Carl.

“Jason.” Rick called after him, halting the young man in his tracks.

“Yeah?” Jason asked, turning round to face him.

“I appreciate the effort you made to speak to me about you and Carl.” Rick told him. “I respect your honesty.”

“You’re his father. It would be wrong of me to keep it hidden from you.” Jason replied.

Rick nodded. “I want you to know that I knew. I figured it out pretty quickly.”

Jason’s eyes widened in shock as he was momentarily stunned into silence. Rick had known but hadn’t said anything for what could have been days.

“Why didn’t you say something?” Jason asked, confusion and surprised.

“Because that was your responsibility.” Rick explained.

Jason understood. Rick had remained silent as a test of character to see if Jason could be trusted and if he was fit to be with his son. By mustering up the courage to take Rick away from the others to inform him of their relationship he had secured Rick’s approval with his level of honesty and maturity. Jason also noted that Rick was far more perceptive than he had originally given him credit for and knew it would be wise to keep that in mind for future reference.

Rick patted his shoulder. “Have a good time but don’t be gone too long.”

“Thanks.” Jason answered with a smile and turned back towards the door.  

 

Laughter signalled the arrival of Jason, Carl and Michonne at the lake. They emerged from the woodland so that they stood on the bank of the lake with the water stretching out in front of them. Carl and Michonne took the sight in, admiring the natural beauty of the area.

“We can get fresh drinking water from here and we can fish too.” Jason told them as he presented the lake to them.

“I was getting sick of canned food.” Michonne commented with a smile.

“It’s pretty secluded from walkers too.” Jason added. “Makes it a good place to sit back and relax for a while under the sun.”

Carl smiled back at Jason whose gaze was upon him. He liked the idea of lying back on the grass with Jason under the sun without constantly having to worry about walkers. Just them, the birds and the lake.

“But first, why don’t we use this lake to have some kind of wash?” Jason suggested. “I’m guessing you haven’t showered or anything since the prison.”

Carl hesitated. He hadn’t expected that suggestion. “But we don’t have fresh clothes or towels.”

Jason shrugged. “We can just dry off in the sun afterwards.”

Carl considered the situation. He knew that Michonne had come along to serve as a guard from walkers or people and could be trusted to look away. However, he wasn’t sure how he felt about bathing naked in the lake with Jason. It seemed a bit soon to be getting quite so intimate. His lower stomach coiled as if butterflies were moving around in it and he quickly realised he wouldn’t be able to control his body if they did this. Carl felt his face heat up as his cheeks turned crimson.

Jason saw the reaction in Carl and realised that for some things the tough teenager was still easily embarrassed. He couldn’t tell if he was nervous about showing his body or about the sexual possibilities. Remembering the conditions set by Rick he laughed lightly and tapped Carl’s shoulder to get his attention.

“We’ll do it one at a time.” Jason added to try and calm Carl down.

It seemed to work as Carl’s face lost some of the redness that had covered it and his shoulders lowered as he relaxed. At that point it was only a question of who went first.  Carl felt nervous about stripping naked out in the open in such a way and even more so with Jason so close by. The idea of Jason looking when he wasn’t supposed to filled Carl with a mix of anxiety and excitement. His inexperience made him unable to understand why.

“I’ll go first.” Jason told him, sensing the younger teen’s hesitation.

Carl let out a sigh of relief at not having to be the first. Jason set his bag down and made his way over to the other side of a fallen tree. The tree was large enough and had enough leaves that it served as a divider and allowed Jason to be visible only from the waist up. Carl couldn’t help but watch as Jason removed his gloves, leather jacket and black top. His slim but toned body was now visible in the sunlight with the darkest patch being the scar on his abdomen from the night he was stabbed. Carl felt his face heat up again when Jason’s eyes stared back into his own. He had been caught staring though Jason didn’t visibly appear to mind.

Carl whipped himself round and sat down with his back against the tree trunk to avoid himself looking any more than he already had. A few seconds later he heard the splashing of water, indicating that Jason was now swimming and bathing as best he could in the fresh water lake. A few metres behind him, Jason was naked. Carl shook his head and tried to think of something else until it was his turn.

Michonne couldn’t help but smile to herself as she watched Carl experience his first love. She knew from her own, far kinder teenage years, what it was like. Hormones, urges, anxiety and everything else that went along with it. It was unfortunate that Carl had to go through it with the addition of walkers and violence around every corner but he did appear to be adapting well.

A few minutes later and Jason had emerged from the water. He came round the other side of the fallen tree topless and barefoot as he carried his top, jacket, gloves and boots with his socks inside them. He placed his clothes down on the grass next to his bag and sat down on the grass. He smiled at Carl who by this point was staring at him again and chuckling in amusement at Jason’s wet hair.

“Your turn, Carl.” Jason told him as he smiled. “The water’s really refreshing on a hot day like this.”

Carl nodded nervously and took his hat off, leaving it next to Jason’s bag as he stood up and made his way round the other side of the fallen tree. His hands shook and his legs felt weaker than normal as he pulled off his shirt. He had a feeling Jason would be watching him and when he glanced over his shoulder his suspicions were confirmed. Carl’s face flushed red again as he felt exposed under Jason’s gaze.

Jason was surprised by how pale Carl’s body was. He clearly never took his shirt off when he was outside because only his arms were tanned. The rest of his body was far lighter. There was something cute about it. He looked away as he knew he’d be making Carl even more nervous than he already was. Jason couldn’t help but feel a pang of excitement knowing Carl would be naked only a few metres behind him.  

After a few moments he heard the splashing of water which signalled to him that Carl was now bathing. Jason turned his attention to Michonne who was leaning against a tree as she kept her eyes peeled for any walkers or anything other dangers.

“Feel free to go in after Carl.” Jason offered. “I can keep watch.”

Michonne shook her head. “I’ll come back tomorrow with Rick.”

Jason raised his eyebrows at her answer. “Oh yeah?” He teased.

“Not like that!” Michonne snapped back with a laugh.

“Sure, I totally believe you!” Jason joked back with a laugh of his own.

Michonne grabbed one of the many sticks of a low hanging branch and broke it off before tossing it at Jason who ducked before it could hit his head. He grinned back at her, matching her own grin of amusement.

As their laughter died down Carl came around the fallen tree. Like Jason he carried his shirt and top in one hand with his boots and socks in the other. His jeans hugged his legs more than usual due to the skin underneath them still being wet. Carl set his clothes down on the opposite side of Jason’s bag from Jason’s own clothes and prepared to sit down next to the older teen.

Jason had other plans and guided Carl with his hands until Carl was sitting between Jason’s open legs. Jason encouraged him to lean back until the skin of his back was pressing against the skin of Jason’s chest and stomach. Carl initially felt nervous at feeling their exposed skin touching but quickly found comfort in the embrace and leaned back against the older teen. Jason wrapped his arms around Carl’s front with a couple of his fingers rubbing over Carl’s gunshot scar softly.

Carl closed his eyes and relaxed. His breath hitched slightly as Jason continued to trace his fingers across his slim body. No one had ever touched him like this before and it felt so relaxing and pleasurable despite its simplicity. He could feel Jason’s heartbeat against his back. Jason’s heart seemed to be pounding but he wasn’t sure why. Carl decided not to ask and instead chose to enjoy the older teen’s gentle caresses. His eyes snapped open when he felt Jason’s lips softly kiss his earlobe. The kiss was soft as his hands continued to gently rub Carl’s chest and stomach. 

“Okay, I’ve gotta say it.” Michonne broke the silence. “You two are cute together.”

Carl blushed at the compliment while Jason grinned and chuckled softly. He lowered his hands off Carl’s chest and took hold of both his hands, squeezing them gently.

“Yeah, I guess we are.” Jason replied.

Carl squeezed Jason’s hands and tried to lean even closer into Jason. Sitting on the grass with Jason spooning him under the late afternoon sun made him feel at peace. The only sounds around them were that of birds singing, leaves blowing in the wind and the trickle of water.

“You know, I used to bring Kellin to a lake like this one. It’s where we shared our first kiss.” Jason told them, his voice low. “We would go swimming together and just spend hours at the lake, just the two of us.”

Jason paused to kiss the back of Carl’s head, the younger teen’s hair was still damp. He gave Carl’s hands another squeeze.

“Wherever we end up staying, I hope there’s a lake nearby.” Jason continued. “I want us to do stuff like that too.”

“Do you think we could?” Carl asked. His concern was with walkers and people.

“Yeah, if we find somewhere secluded enough.” Jason answered optimistically.

“We should probably head back.” Michonne told them. “Don’t want Rick to get worried.”

Jason and Carl nodded in agreement. Jason reluctantly let go of Carl’s hands so the teenager could put on his shoes, boots and his shirts. Jason sighed as he did the same. He could have stayed in that embrace for hours without complaint. Unfortunately they could only drop their guard for so long before life would remind them that they were never safe.

As soon as Carl placed his hat on his head they were ready to go. That was when it happened. The unmistakable click of gun safety switches sounded around them. Michonne pulled out her sword but before she could prepare herself to use it a man burst out of the bushes behind her and slammed the butt of his gun against the back of her head. Michonne dropped her sword and collapsed onto her front, the force of the impact rendering her unconscious.

Carl and Jason both whipped out their guns and aimed at the man who stood before him. He wore black boots, dirty, ripped black jeans and a sleeveless black leather biker jacket. His arms were covered with tattoos. He held a Remington 870 shotgun in his hands which he was aiming at Jason and Carl with.

To the left of Carl and Jason a man and woman appeared. The man was black, bald and wore dirty black running shoes, ripped grey jeans and a blood stained white shirt. In his hands he wielded an Uzi. The woman next to him was young and rather pretty. Her long black hair was a mess with two prominent bangs falling in front of her blue eyes. She was dressed in dirty converse shoes, blood stained blue jeans and a dirty red tracksuit top. In her hands she aimed a Springfield Armory M1911-A1 handgun.

Jason felt his body shake with adrenaline. He had to keep Carl safe but now he had an unconscious Michonne to worry about. They were outnumbered and outgunned three to two. Despite his desperation he couldn’t think of a way to attack that would avoid Carl being injured or killed.

Carl stood still and kept his gun aimed at the head of the first man to have appeared. He knew their chances of surviving a gun fight with this new group would be slim but he hoped Jason would have a plan or that his Dad would come looking for them.

Jason felt cold steel pressed against the back of his neck. There was a fourth member of the group that now had them surrounded. He recognised the cold steel as the barrel of a gun. A cold shiver ran down his spine as any chances he had of making a move vanished with the fourth person’s appearance.

“Drop your guns.” A man’s voice ordered. “Now!”

“You lower yours.” Jason answered, trying desperately to hide his fear. “No one needs to get shot.”

The man behind him laughed as Jason felt the barrel disappear from his neck. Jason turned to catch sight of the man but received a strong punch to the face that whipped his head around and brought him to his knees.

“Get off me!” Carl snarled suddenly.

Jason looked up and felt the blood drain from his face at the sight he was greeted with. The man had his left arm around Carl’s neck, holding the boy in place easily. He was clearly a strong man. The man appeared to be military of some kind as his weapon of choice was an M16 assault rifle. He wore combat boots, dirty brown cargos and a dark green army jacket. As Jason observed the man he noticed something shocking above the long and dirty white beard. He knew the face. By the smirk that was plastered on it, the man had also just recognised Jason too.

“Well I’ll be damned!” The old man declared loudly. “Long time no see, Jason!”

“Bill, I thought you were dead.” Jason answered, standing back up on his feet.

Bill tightened his grip on Carl who continued to struggle. “I damn well should have been after you abandoned me!”

“I had no choice! There were hundreds of walkers.” Jason countered the accusation. “Everyone else was dead and we didn’t have enough ammo to take them all down.”

Bill chortled incredulously at Jason’s answer. “That sounds like a line of horseshit!”

“It’s the truth!” Jason pressed.

“Bullshit!” Bill bellowed back. “You ran away and left me for dead you little shit!”

Jason decided it was wiser to not answer right away. There wasn’t just rage in Bill’s eyes, there was a touch of madness. It appeared that the poor man had lost his mind in the four months since they last met.

“You know, there’s a herd of those zombies nearby. Why don’t we fire a few shots and attract them this way?” Bill told him, knocking Carl to his knees. “I want to see if you’ll abandon the boy and the bitch or try to save them.”

“What happened to you, Bill?” Jason asked softly, making sure to not antagonise the man. “You weren’t like this before.”

“What happened to me?” Bill spat back. “What _happened_? You wanna know what fucking happened to me?!”

_“Bill, we need to leave now!” Jason ordered as he grabbed his bag._

_Bill shook his head. “I’m not leaving these patients to die here like this.”_

_“We can’t stay! The herd will tear the building down!” Jason bellowed._

_“I told you that I’m not leaving.” Bill bellowed back, his usual calm demeanour gone. “Now either stand like a man or run like a coward.”_

_“If you stay here then you’ll die and you won’t get to save anyone else!” Jason continued to plead with the older man. “We need you alive.”_

_“Those people in those wards need me. I’m not abandoning them!” Bill roared back. “If you don’t try to save one life then you’ll never save any!”_

_With that Bill rushed for the entrance to the hospital and aimed his weapon. By that point the herd were only a few feet away from the door. Several other members of the hospital group opened fire on the approaching sea of corpses, all of them with the same determination to protect their home and friends. Jason cursed and grabbed a gun from one of the boxes in the hallway. He ran to one of the ground floor windows and aimed the barrel of a Heckler & Koch PSG1 sniper rifle out the window. He started firing at the approaching wave of undead, the scope of the rifle making headshots very easy. At the same time Jason felt that the whole effort was pointless. They couldn’t kill the whole herd before it reached the doors. _

_Bill backed away from the doors to reload his M16 as the walkers finally reached the doors. A couple people who had been too caught up in shooting were overwhelmed and devoured by the advancing horde. Jason rushed from the windows as more walkers started to smash them and crawl in. The walkers dropped into the rooms from the windows and forced themselves through the doors, spilling into the hallways like a deadly liquid. The narrow nature of the hallways meant that only so many walkers could come through at a time which made it easier to shoot them but more of them just kept coming._

_Jason had discarded the empty rifle and had grabbed a police issue Remington 870 shotgun, firing it at the heads of the approaching corpses. Sweat rolled down his face as he continued firing with the other members of the hospital, his ears rang painfully from all the gunfire. Although it looked like he was standing to fight and protect the place, his mind was already trying to figure out a way to escape. All these guns and gunfire and they hadn’t even made a dent in the advancing herd. The smell was overpowering, assaulting the senses and making their eyes water as the loud chorus of undead groans and snarls filled the air. Jason couldn’t bring himself to remain in the hallway much longer. As he reloaded the shotgun, he noticed that Bill was still firing at the walkers, carefully shooting each one in the head with his M16._

_A loud crash got Jason’s attention as several more walkers had broken down various doors after entering through the ground floor windows. They were quickly filling in the entire building. Bill seemed unfazed as he continued to fire at the approaching monsters. Jason started backing up and only took shots at walkers that he felt were getting too close. Gunfire. Screams. Undead groans. The smell. It was just like that night. The night he lost his reason to live. The hospital was lost. There were too many walkers, too few people and not enough ammo. As Bill continued to shoot at the undead army Jason cursed himself and ran in the opposite direction. He owed Bill his life but Bill’s stubborn refusal to accept defeat was going to get everyone killed. Jason didn’t want to die. He wasn’t ready._

_Bill watched as Jason ran down the corridor, shooting walkers in the face with his shotgun as he went. The young man, the coward, was abandoning the hospital and everyone in it to certain doom just so he could save himself. They could have worked to guide the herd away together but now there was no hope. Bill was on his own against an army of undead cannibals. Bill’s shots were fast and accurate, all of his bullets destroying the brains of the advancing corpses but they were beginning to surround him._

_Bill turned around and kicked a walker onto its back before shooting the two that were behind it. He ran from the approaching walkers and made his way to the stairwell. He didn’t bother trying to close the door behind him as the herd was following him like a flowing river of death. Bill ascended the stairs as fast as he could, his legs burning from the strain as his breath became laboured from the struggle to fuel his muscles with oxygen. The assault rifle was heavy in his arms and slowed him down. The hungry moans, growls and snarls of the monsters behind him echoed loudly in the stairwell._

_Bill reached the top of the stairwell and desperately shoulder barged the door open. The roof stretched out before him. He turned back around and kicked the closest walker in the chest with as much force as he could. The walker fell backwards down the stairs and created a domino effect on the walkers behind it as it crashed into them. Breathing a sigh of relief, Bill stepped out onto the roof and closed the door behind him. Before he allowed himself to relax he pulled out a knife and cut the wiring on one of the television antennas. Once he had a loose line of wire he tied one end to the door handle and the other end to the antenna, locking the door._

_Bill breathed a sigh of relief and allowed himself to catch his breath. A loud gunshot echoed nearby which he turned his head towards the source of. The same sniper that had attracted the herd in the first place was still shooting at the walkers below, seemingly unaware or apathetic towards the destruction of the hospital. Bill growled with rage and without thinking pulled the trigger of his M16 and shot the man through the temple. He stormed over to the man’s corpse and checked his pockets for anything useful. Once he was sure the man had nothing left to offer he rolled the body off the edge of the roof, allowing it to fall to the ground below like a peace offering to the herd._

_Bill sighed as he studied his situation. He had limited supplies on the roof, was surrounded on all sides by a huge herd of walkers and had very little ammo left. He dropped to his knees before laying on his back to look up at the clouds. Everyone he had worked so hard to protect had either died or abandoned him. He was alone._

“Once my water bottles ran dry, the only thing that kept me alive was rainwater.” Bill finished explaining his side of that fateful day. “You did that to me.”

Jason felt a mix of guilt and indifference. If he had had any idea that Bill would have survived then he would never have run away. However, Bill had made his own choices and Jason couldn’t be held accountable for them.

“I was on that godforsaken roof for about two weeks.” Bill continued. “That’s when Zoey here came looking for supplies in the hospital.”

“I’m sorry, Bill.” Jason finally apologised, lowering his gaze and hoping no more violence had to take place.

“No. No you’re not. Not yet.” Bill hissed back and aimed his M16 at the back of Carl’s head.

Upon seeing Bill’s gun pressed against Carl’s head Jason acted on instinct. He attempted to lunge forward towards Bill but didn’t expect a powerful kick to come from the right. The young black man had kicked Jason onto his side and now hovered over him with his Uzi aimed at Jason’s head. Jason closed his eyes in defeat. At least it would be quick.

Suddenly a gunshot rang out around them as blood splashed Jason’s face. He opened his eyes in time to see the black man collapsed to the floor with a fresh bullet wound in his head. Bill, Zoey and the tattooed man scattered for cover as more shots rang out. They attempted to shoot back but their target was keeping themselves hidden in the trees. More loud gunshots rang out.

“Carl! Get down!” Rick’s voice bellowed from the trees.

Carl did as his father instructed and dashed towards Jason, lowering his body as Jason instinctively wrapped an arm around him. The tattooed man took aim at the trees so Jason took the opportunity to get a free shot in and pulled the trigger of his own gun. Before the tattooed man could react the bullet exploded through his skull and ended his existence.

The woman, Zoey, dashed over and kept her gun aimed at Jason.

“Drop it!” She snarled.

Jason did as he was told and dropped his gun on the floor with another sigh of defeat. The woman was almost in tears at having witnessed two members of her group killed in front of her. Jason felt no sympathy for her.

Rick caught sight of Zoey hovering over Jason and his son so he dashed out from behind a tree in order to get closer. As soon as he did he was met with the butt of Bill’s assault rifle. The older man had predicted him and caught him by surprise. Bill grabbed Rick by the collar of his shirt and dragged him over to where Michonne lay unconscious.

Zoey turned her attention to Bill, seeking comfort and guidance for what they were supposed to do next. As soon as she turned her head, Jason pulled out his machete and jumped to his feet. The young woman turned round just in time to see Jason swing the machete at her before it struck her in the neck, severing the arteries there and leaving her partially decapitated. She gurgled out blood as she tried in vain to cling onto life before dropping to the ground from blood loss.

“Carl, get behind cover.” Jason told his lover. His tone was cold.

Carl did as he was told and ran for the trees. He didn’t want to leave Jason alone with Bill but he knew better to argue with him. He realised that his father must have dropped the Colt Python on the ground somewhere and made it his mission to find it.

Jason aimed his pistol at Bill who aimed back at him with his assault rifle. Neither man pulled the trigger nor did they appear to want to in that moment.

“Oh, this is gonna be bad.” Bill threatened. He already had Jason’s punishment planned in his mind.

“You saved my life, Bill. I owe you my life.” Jason pleaded with the old man across from him. “You were a good man who tried to help people.”

“Until people like you decided to fuck me over!” Bill snarled back.

“The Bill I know didn’t do it for any reward. He did it because it was the right thing to do.” Jason continued desperately. “That good man must still be inside you somewhere. This can’t be all that’s left.”

“The Bill you knew is dead!” Bill bellowed angrily. “Just like you and everyone you know soon will be!”

Jason sighed. He realised that Bill truly was too far gone in his own madness to be helped. The man he had met had indeed died in the hospital the day the herd attacked. The man standing before him was nothing but a ghost, a shell of his former self. Jason still didn’t want to kill him though he knew he would inevitably have to.

Jason growled and fired his gun, shooting Bill in the shoulder so that he would drop the M16. As soon as the M16 hit the ground Jason rushed at Bill and threw a strong punch which connected with Bill’s face. Bill staggered back before catching himself in time for the next punch which he side-stepped with surprising swiftness for a man of his age. Having taken Jason by surprise he struck Jason in the face with a punch of his own. Jason swayed to the side but remained on his feet but before he could react Bill was already on him with a strike to his head.

The strike to his head was strong enough to daze Jason, his vision blurry and his balance slightly off. Bill rushed in for another punch but Jason caught his arm and pulled the older man off-balance so that he stumbled into a tree. Once Bill’s back was against the tree Jason started punching him in the gut and in the face. He punched Bill with all the strength he could muster, his fingerless gloves the only things stopping his knuckles from splitting open from the impacts.

Bill caught Jason by surprise and kneed him in the gut with enough force to temporarily wind the younger man. He followed it up with a powerful uppercut that slammed Jason’s teeth together and sent him stumbling backwards as he tried not to fall on his back. By some miracle Jason managed to stay on his feet. He looked up and saw that Bill was already rushing towards him again. Jason lifted his leg in an attempt to kick the older man but in doing so he put all his weight on his injured leg. The gunshot wound compromised the strength of his leg and sent pain shooting through him, forcing Jason to lower his leg and abandon the kick.

Bill charged into Jason and knocked him onto his back on the ground. Before the young man could attempt to get up Bill landed on top of him with his knees pressing into Jason’s chest. One hand gripped Jason’s neck like a vice. He punched Jason multiple times before catching sight of a gun lying on the ground. The gun had belonged to Zoey. Different emotions flooded through Bill as he pushed the barrel against Jason’s forehead, a crazed grin on his face as they both knew he had won the fight. Bill was moments away from vengeance.

A loud gunshot suddenly echoed around them as blood splattered over the ground next to Jason. Bill dropped the gun that had been in his hand and fell off of Jason onto his side. Jason looked at the body and discovered that Bill had been shot in the head. He turned to the direction of the shot to find Carl standing with Rick’s Colt Python in his shaking hands.

Carl kept the gun in his hand as he rushed over to Jason who was sitting up, breathing heavily and bleeding. Carl instantly wrapped his arms around Jason’s neck and held him close as Jason’s own arms wrapped themselves around Carl’s slim body. They remained in the embrace for several long moments. They had survived the attack. They were alive. They still had each other.

A couple loud hungry groans and snarls reminded them that they were in a world filled with danger. The gunshots and fighting had attracted nearby walkers and two of them were now in the clearing with them. The corpses snarled hungrily as they approached Jason and Carl. Before either of them could react the walkers foreheads exploded and they dropped to the ground.

Previously obscured from sight by the now dead walkers stood Sasha with her suppressed Custom AR-15 rifle in her hands. It was a relief to see her even if her arrival had been too late to stop the fight with Bill’s barbaric group.

“Are you alright?” Sasha asked, rushing over to the two teens.

“We’re fine.” Jason answered with a nod.

Sasha glanced over and spotted the unconscious forms of Rick and Michonne. “What about them, are they okay?”

Jason nodded again. “Just unconscious. Nothing to worry about.”

“What the hell happened?” Sasha questioned in shock, taking in the sight of the four dead bodies around them.

“I’ll explain later.” Jason answered, breaking the embrace with Carl to lift Rick. “Help me get Rick and Michonne back to the church before more walkers show up.”

Sasha didn’t argue and lowered her rifle. She picked up Michonne’s sword and grunted as she lifted the unconscious samurai to her feet so she could be carried to the church. Jason grunted and struggled with the weight of Rick on him but focused on getting them moving. They could manage a five minute walk.

 

“Who the hell were they?” Rick snarled at Jason. “They knew you. Why?”

Jason sighed. His body, leg and face was throbbing with pain from the fight. His head was hurting from the revelation of Bill’s survival and fate. His heart ached with guilt knowing that he had almost failed to keep Carl safe as Bill was fully prepared to kill him as punishment for what Jason had done.

“The old man, Bill. He saved my life four months ago.” Jason explained. He lifted his shirt to show his knife scar. “I had been stabbed and was bleeding out. He nursed me back to health.”

Rick glared at him. He needed more than that. He needed to know why the man was a threat.

“I woke up at a hospital, Harrison Memorial.” Jason continued to explain.

Carl instantly glanced over at Rick. Rick also narrowed his eyes. It was the same hospital he had been in when he got shot. It had been abandoned when he woke up but it was in a good enough condition to function again. Rick believed him so far.

“He was the head doctor there. They had a small community of people.” Jason continued, rubbing his forehead. “Everyone helped out. Then the sniper on the roof started shooting at a group of walkers.”

Sasha, Tyreese, Rick, Carl, Michonne and Gabriel paid closer attention to his story. As soon as walkers were mentioned they knew something happened involving them.

“Turned out it was a herd. A huge one, maybe three hundred strong.” Jason explained. “I tried to evacuate but Bill wanted to stay. We fought them off but it was futile.”

Jason hung his head in shame as he continued.

“I decided it wasn’t worth staying so I ran. I begged him to do the same but he refused.” Jason explained. “I thought he died. One man versus three hundred corpses. How was I supposed to assume any different?”

Rick lowered his head and stared into Jason’s eyes, studying him. “But he didn’t.”

Jason shook his head. “He made it to the roof. He was trapped up there for two weeks and blamed me for it.”

“So he came after you?” Michonne asked, curious.

Jason shook his head again. “He didn’t know it was me until we faced each other. It was a coincidence.”

“Is there anyone else who blames you for anything?” Rick questioned him aggressively. “Anyone else we need to worry about?”

“No, he was the only one.” Jason was intimidated by the look in Rick’s eyes. It was as if he was looking for an excuse to kill him. “I thought he was dead so I never mentioned it.”

“Dad, it wasn’t his fault.” Carl interrupted, earning a glare from Rick. “We survived, right?”

“This time.” Rick countered. He didn’t want to gamble with his son’s life.

“That’s all there is anymore. This time. Right here and right now.” Carl retorted. He was upset by his father trying to pin the blame on Jason.

Before Rick could answer, Carl stormed away from the group and headed to the office. He slammed the door behind him, the bang echoing against the walls of the church hall.

“Whatever they planned to do, Rick.” Jason added, getting the man’s attention again. “They would have done anyway. I was just a bonus.”

Rick wanted to respond, the look on his eyes made it clear but his mind couldn’t organise what he wanted to say. He took a breath to calm himself down and nodded, accepting Jason’s explanation. Jason wasn’t sure if this action also absolved him of any blame for what happened but he knew better than to ask.

Judith’s cries sounded from the front of the church. Rick responded immediately by marching over to his crying daughter to take up his responsibilities as a father. It was also a way for him to separate himself from the argument and give Jason some space.

Michonne decided to head outside and keep watch for any walkers or for Daryl and Carol. Wanting to distance himself from Rick and to give Carl some space, Jason decided to join her and closed the front door behind them. The cool night air hit his face as he sat down on the steps with the samurai.

 

In the office Carl sat with his back against the door and with his knees curled up to his chest. He took deep breaths to try and calm himself down. He knew his father was just being protective but so soon after accepting his relationship with Jason it hurt. Carl knew they were lucky to be alive. His hands shook from shooting Bill. It was the first life he had taken since the battle at the prison and he didn’t feel comfortable with having done it. Carl knew that it had been necessary and that he did it to save Jason’s life but it wasn’t something he wanted to get used to like Jason and his father had.

As his thoughts were on Jason he noticed Jason’s bag lying next to the bed. It had been placed there while they waited for Rick and Michonne to wake up. In an effort to take his mind off the argument and the horrific events at the lake, he took the opportunity to finally read the passage in Jason’s diary he hadn’t been able to finish.

Carl unzipped the bag and quickly found the black book, Jason’s diary. He opened it up and skimmed through the pages, checking the dates before he came to the twenty-fifth of November. Although he had read the start of it before he chose to refresh his memory and start from the beginning again. This time he hoped he wouldn’t be interrupted.

_Jason and Kellin sat down on Jason’s bed. They had just got back from the cinema and as Jason’s parents were away they had the house to themselves for the whole night. They were laughing at some small jokes Kellin was telling when Jason stopped the laughter momentarily._

_“Having a good birthday then?” Jason asked the blonde with a smile._

_Kellin nodded excitedly. “Best I’ve ever had.”_

_“Well, there’s still one last present I have to give you.” Jason announced with a grin._

_“Oh? What is it?” Kellin asked. He was surprised that Jason had left it until late at night._

_“Me.” Jason announced with a smile and kissed Kellin softly._

_“But I have you every day, silly.” Kellin countered, using one of his many nicknames for Jason._

_“Not like this.” Jason answered._

_Jason then placed his hand on the inside of Kellin’s thigh and kissed him strongly, his tongue sliding into Kellin’s mouth to battle with Kellin’s tongue. As their tongues continued to duel, Jason slowly slid his hand up Kellin’s thigh until he was cupping his boyfriend through his jeans._

_Kellin gasped at the sudden contact. It was rare for them to touch each other so intimately and they had never had full sex before. Kellin’s heartbeat shot through the roof when he realised that’s what Jason meant by having him. That was the final present of the day._

_Jason smiled into the kiss as he felt Kellin harden through his jeans and removed his hand so he could pull at Kellin’s shirt. He broke the kiss as Kellin raised his arms so his shirt could be pulled off easily and as soon as it hit the floor, Jason went for Kellin’s collarbones, kissing and nipping them gently with his teeth. This earned him loud gasps from Kellin as he rubbed his lover’s sides, his mouth and tongue finding Kellin’s nipples._

_Kellin let out a moan as he felt Jason’s tongue flick and tease at one of his nipples. He was like mush under Jason’s loving assault as this wasn’t the result of both of them being horny or bored, this was a premeditated gift of love for Kellin’s birthday. Another moan left Kellin’s mouth as his other nipple received the same treatment. He was aching inside his jeans, knowing that it wouldn’t be long before Jason made his way back down there._

_Soon enough, Jason was kissing his way down Kellin’s body until he reached the waistband of his skinny jeans. He undid the belt and button there before pulling them down off his legs. Jason was still fully clothed and he could tell that it frustrated Kellin slightly. He stopped for a moment to pull of his own shirt before returning his attention to Kellin._

_Kellin let out a hiss of pleasure as Jason grasped him through his boxers, smirking at the reaction he received from his lover. Jason leaned forward and captured his lips again. The kiss was slow and loving as Jason continued to rub him through the fabric of his boxers._

_“Fuck, Jason!” Kellin hissed as they broke the kiss. “So good!”_

_Jason chuckled lowly at his boyfriend’s ecstatic reaction to his actions._

_“Tonight I’m going to make you mine.”_

_Kellin let out a low moan in response as Jason captured his lips again. Jason’s hands came up to play with Kellin’s blonde hair as their tongues battled each other lovingly. Despite being clad only in his boxers, Kellin found it blistering hot in Jason’s room. Having Jason pressed against him felt amazing, so much so he could barely comprehend how pleasurable their love making was going to be._

_Kellin’s hands rubbed down Jason’s back before making their way round his hips to his belt buckle. It was hard for Kellin to undo it with Jason crashing their lips together but he eventually managed to loosen the belt and undo the button on Jason’s own jeans. Jason broke the kiss to pull off his own jeans leaving the two lovers in nothing but their boxers._

_Jason leaned forward and attacked Kellin’s neck with his mouth, leaving wet kisses all over it before biting down gently as he thrust his hips forward. Kellin gasped as they grinded against each other before groaning loudly in pleasure. Encouraged by the sounds his boyfriend was making, Jason continued to grind against him harder and slightly faster._

_“Jason, stop!” Kellin gasped out desperately._

_Jason stopped instantly. “What’s wrong?”_

_Kellin felt his face flush red as he stared back into Jason’s concerned eyes. Despite the love and concern that was etched into his face, Kellin could see the intense underlying sexual hunger in Jason’s eyes._

_“If you keep doing that I’ll finish early.” Kellin admitted in embarrassment._

_Jason placed a kiss on his forehead and smiled. “That’s okay.”_

_Kellin smiled back and swallowed thickly as Jason made his way down his thin body. Jason stopped at the waistband of Kellin’s boxers and slowly pulled them off, allowing Kellin’s erection to proudly bob free. Kellin blushed fiercely as Jason stared up at him with a hungry smirk on his face._

_Kellin moaned lowly as Jason enveloped his hardness with the warm, moist cavern of his mouth. He tried to control his breathing as Jason slowly moved his head up and down, his lips forming a tight seal against the skin of his shaft. With his eyes closed in pleasure thanks to Jason’s hot mouth and whip-like tongue, Kellin could only hear the sound of a sealed container being opened but couldn’t find the words to ask Jason what he was doing._

_Kellin gasped loudly and opened his eyes in surprise as he felt something very cold pressing against his entrance. Jason’s eyes met his own, freezing in place in case Kellin wasn’t ready. He looked around and discovered that the sealed container that had been opened was a small jar of lubricant. He didn’t know Jason had any. It made him wonder what other secrets Jason kept from him._

_Once Kellin relaxed and accepted what was coming next, Jason resumed his ministrations. His mouth took in Kellin’s hardness once again, his tongue flicking at the tip as his lubed finger gently slid into Kellin’s entrance, opening him up as slowly as possible. Kellin hissed in pain before whining in pleasure as Jason made an extra effort to please him with his tongue. The mix of pain and pleasure was strange to Kellin and he wasn't sure what sounds to make._

_Jason waited for Kellin to adjust to the first finger before he slid in a second finger just as slowly and gently as the first. Kellin took in a sharp breath, the pain being much greater this time causing him to momentarily tense up. Again, Jason waited for Kellin to relax before he began moving his two fingers around. As he scissored his fingers to stretch Kellin some more, he doubled his efforts with his mouth and was rewarded with loud moans of pleasure._

_Jason could feel his lover throb inside his mouth and knew that he was close. His tongue continued to flick and lick at Kellin’s shaft while his fingers searched for something inside him. Jason’s fingers pressed against something inside Kellin that drew out a loud gasp of his name. He had found what he was looking for._

_Kellin’s moans intensified as Jason focused on pressing his fingers against that spot while his head continued to bob up and down along his shaft. Sweat trickled from his forehead as he screwed his eyes shut in pleasure. The familiar tight coiling in his lower abdomen the tell-tale sign of his impending orgasm._

_“Jason!!” Kellin cried out in pleasure as he fisted the bed sheets, bucked his hips and exploded into Jason’s awaiting mouth._

_Jason smiled after removing his mouth from Kellin and swallowed down his offering. It filled him with an intense blend of pride and desire to see Kellin panting from pleasure, his face and chest flushed red and his hairline damp with sweat. He did that. He had turned his lover into jelly._

_“Fucking hell!” Kellin exclaimed as he got his breath back._

_Jason kissed Kellin’s jaw and smirked against it. “The best bit is yet to come, babe.”_

_Kellin groaned in anticipation, knowing that the best part of his final birthday gift was about to happen. He watched with hungry eyes as Jason rid himself of his boxers and coated his rock hard erection with lube. Kellin could undoubtedly say that it was the single hottest thing he had ever witnessed. Jason was the hottest guy he had ever met. And he was his. His heart swelled with pride and love at how lucky he was to be with him._

_Jason lifted Kellin’s legs and lined himself up with his entrance. He looked into Kellin’s eyes asking for permission one last time. As soon as Kellin nodded he slid himself inside and groaned as Kellin’s tight warmth gripped onto him. Kellin let out a long moan at the feeling of Jason being inside of him as Jason let out an equally long moan. They stayed still for a few minutes, basking in the feeling of their union. They were physically linked for the first time, matching the emotional link they already shared._

_Jason leaned forward and rubbed their noses together gently before kissing Kellin lovingly._

_“I love you, Kellin.” Jason declared sincerely, his face flush with pleasure. “Happy Birthday.”_

_“I love you too.” Kellin choked back, the emotional intensity of the moment almost overwhelming him._

_With that said, Jason started to move, slowly thrusting in and then out. Kellin gasped as his body adjusted to Jason’s length moving inside him and before long any discomfort was completely replaced by raw pleasure. He needed more. He needed it to be faster. He needed Jason. Kellin wrapped his legs around Jason as a sign for him to move._

_Jason did not need to be told twice and increased the speed of his thrusts causing them both to moan and gasp with pleasure. Jason knew neither of them were going to last long so he focused on angling his thrusts correctly. Kellin shouted his name as the head of his erection struck the small bundle of nerves inside Kellin. Jason smiled and aimed for that spot repeatedly, thrusting harder against it._

_With each thrust against his sweet spot, Kellin let out a high pitched moan. The feeling was indescribable as raw pleasure shot through his entire body like an electrical current. Just when he thought it couldn’t get any better he felt Jason’s hand wrap itself around his newly formed erection. Between the strong, fast and precise thrusts of Jason’s hardness inside of him and Jason’s skilled hand stroking him blindingly fast Kellin was overwhelmed with pleasure._

_“Jason! I’m gonna…” Kellin called out, trying to warn his lover._

_“I know, me too!” Jason called back, interrupting him._

_Jason continued to thrust into Kellin while stroking him as fast as he could in the position he was in. Pleasure was shooting through both of them with the same intensity and nothing was more overpowering than the love they felt for each other at that moment. Knowing that they were making love to the person they vowed never to be apart from was too much for both young men._

_Kellin was the first to climax, his essence spilling out over Jason’s hand and over his abdomen. The tightening of Kellin’s inner walls around him was too much for Jason to take as he cried out Kellin’s name and exploded inside of him._

There was more to the passage but Carl had to stop reading. His face was flushed and his jeans were uncomfortably tight. The story had turned him on and he didn’t know what to do. He couldn’t risk doing anything in case someone came looking for him. The other problem was that he had never really done anything sexual before as the showers and cells at the prison meant there had been no true privacy. His hands shook as he stared at the page, amazed at the effect the story had on him and also amazed at the way two males could have sex. By the sounds of things, it did feel good but he couldn’t imagine it.

The office door opened and Carl scrambled to put the diary back in Jason’s bag but he was too slow. He turned his head towards the door and felt like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming car. Jason was standing in the doorway.

Jason closed the door behind him and took in the situation before him. Carl was on his knees on the office floor, his bag was open and his diary was in Carl’s hands. He recognised what passage it was even at a distance. The look of terror on Carl’s face amused him somewhat but any joke he was about to make was instantly forgotten when he saw the bulge in Carl’s jeans. Not only had Carl read the entire passage but it had got him hard.

Realisation quickly hit Jason and he felt himself flush with excitement. He was now alone in a room with Carl. His boyfriend, Carl. Not only that but Carl was rock hard under his tight jeans, a fact that caused Jason’s own loins to stir. He could see that similar thoughts were going through Carl’s excited mind. He could touch Carl if he wanted to, if Carl wanted him to. Rick knew about their relationship so there was nothing to hide and nothing to fear.

Jason took a breath and closed his eyes. He had to shut down that line of thought right away. Though they could do something if they wanted to, after the argument he had with Rick he didn’t think it was wise to let Rick hear him doing sexual things with his son. They would need to wait until Rick was out on a run at some point.

It was only at that moment he remembered that he hadn’t said anything to Carl who was still kneeling on the floor nervously.

“Relax, Carl.” Jason cooed and raised his hand. “I’m not angry.”

Carl’s shoulders dropped as some of the tension left his body. He put the diary back in Jason’s bag and stood up, the bulge in his jeans still visible. Jason closed the distance between them and hugged Carl close to him before removing the younger teen’s hat so he could kiss him softly. Jason recognised the look in Carl’s eyes. Hunger.

“Did you enjoy reading it?” Jason asked him nervously.

He didn’t want to start anything sexual but he couldn’t help but ask how Carl felt about what he had read.

Carl nodded nervously. “Can we do that sometime?”

Jason felt the air leave his lungs. What a question. It confirmed that it was definitely something Carl wanted to do in their relationship.

“Yeah, eventually.” Jason answered, fighting to maintain his self-control. He wanted nothing more than to touch his young lover right there and then.

“Why not now?” Carl asked, lust clouding his better judgement.

Jason bit his lip. He could feel his resolve slipping and if Carl continued to ask provocative questions he would lose what little control he had left. He couldn’t allow himself to slip up.

“I don’t feel comfortable doing it with your Dad around.” Jason explained slowly, calmly. “Maybe we can ask Michonne to take him on a run tomorrow, okay?”

Carl huffed in disappointment. He wanted to do something but Jason seemed to have an excuse for everything. He wondered if it was because he was too young, a reason he was getting sick of hearing.

“Is that really the reason or am I still too young?” Carl asked with irritation lacing his tone.

Jason didn’t want another argument. He took Carl’s hand in his own and guided it down to Carl’s groin. Carl gasped as Jason pressed his hand against his clothed hardness. His heart pounded in his chest as Jason then guided Carl’s hand to his own clothed erection. Carl let out a shaky breath as he palmed Jason through his jeans. Jason did want this as much as he did but refused to do it with Rick around.

Jason kissed Carl softly and smiled, releasing his hand. “Tomorrow. I promise.”

Carl smiled back and nodded in acceptance. Jason led them over to the couch and pulled Carl onto it beside him after they had kicked off their boots. Carl instinctively cuddled in close to Jason’s larger frame as they prepared to sleep. They shared another kiss before closing their eyes, wrapped in each other’s embrace.

 

Michonne held her sword in her hand at the ready should any threats come out of the darkness. Around her crickets and cicadas sang their nightly chorus. The night air was cool and still. The church door behind her opened as Father Gabriel came out. She quickly sheathed her katana.

“Can’t sleep.” Gabriel told her as he sat down next to her.

Michonne didn’t respond as her eyes continued to scan their surroundings.

“You know, sitting in there, in the quiet.” Gabriel continued. “It isn’t just what happened last night. Same as what happened before. That loud. I see it all again. I hear them.”

Gabriel was referring to the dark and guilty memory of the night he locked his congregation out of the church.

“Yeah. That won’t stop.” Michonne rasped in response. “But it won’t be all the time.”

A rustling in the bushes to their right caught their attention. Michonne stood up and unsheathed her sword while Gabriel quickly made his way back inside. Michonne held her sword at the ready as she approached the bushes the rustling had come from. It was hard to see in the dark so she strained her ears to listen for more movement and prepared herself for the worst.

Suddenly, Daryl emerged from the darkness. He looked tired but he was alive. Michonne smiled in relief, happy to see him after everything that had happened in his absence. Then she saw the distressed look on his face and noticed that he was alone.

“Where’s Carol?” She asked, expecting to hear bad news.

Daryl turned to the bushes behind him. “Come on out!”

 

* * *

 

**And it is finally done! I apologise for having taken over a month to write this chapter. I was working over the winter, lost my motivation for a while, started a new daily routine and had a 2 year anniversary to celebrate.**

**As a result, I decided to give you all a late Christmas gift in the form of a full lemon and hints of Jason/Carl stuff to come. I’m sure the video game reference will be easily spotted too.**

**I crammed a lot of development in this chapter simply because I don’t know how the second half of Season 5 will be, so I decided to use this opportunity to do some necessary character development just in case I don’t have an opportunity later.**

**Thanks for all the follows/favourites/kudos/subscriptions/bookmarks etc.**

**Thanks to the reviewers of chapter 11: Lavender1088, TheCowardlyGuest, heavensentsky, Rk0192, SaraP, jar98, Chancey and that one random guest.**

**Be sure to leave a review and let me know what your thoughts are ^^**

**Happy New Year everyone!**

 

 


	13. A Light Goes Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Rick and the others head out to save Beth and Carol from Grady Memorial, Jason and Carl use that time to get closer and enjoy some intimacy.

_The front door creaked on its hinges as it opened. Jason followed Kellin and stepped into the hallway, entering Kellin’s house. The strong stench of cigarette smoke assaulted his senses as he closed the door over behind him. Kellin had come out to his family the day before and had promptly been kicked out of the house for good. After a long cry and a heart to heart in Jason’s bedroom, he had been offered the chance to live with Jason. They had returned together to get Kellin’s belongings from his old room._

_It didn’t take long before Kellin’s father emerged from the living room and stood in the connecting doorway with a beer bottle in his hand. He stood a head height taller than Jason and was built like a rugby player. A brown belt held up his torn blue jeans below his white tank top that was covered in stains. His hair was receding with age and his face sported a four day old stubble. His face contorted with disgust when he caught sight of Kellin._

_“You don’t live here anymore.” He spat out venomously. “Get out!”_

_Kellin turned towards him, his lip quivering and his eyes beginning to stain with tears. Jason tapped his shoulder and whispered for him to get his things from his room. Kellin did as he was told and disappeared through one of the doors._

_“And who the fuck are you?” He asked Jason, his eyes scanning him with contempt. “You his faggot friend?”_

_“Actually, it’s pronounced boyfriend.” Jason retorted, folding his arms._

_Kellin’s father pulled a face that gave the impression he was going to vomit. He clenched the beer bottle in his hand and took a step forward towards Jason. The man was intimidatingly large compared to Jason’s smaller frame yet the teenager stood where he was._

_“Get the fuck out of my house before I call the police.” The older man hissed angrily._

_Jason knew that Kellin’s ogre of a father was trying to intimidate him. Normally it would work but he had promised to defend Kellin from his family and he hadn’t come alone. Jason smirked in response and gestured to the living room window._

_“They’re already here.” He retorted calmly._

_Kellin’s father turned his head round to glare out the window. Parked outside the house was a police patrol car with the driver’s door open. At the open door stood a police officer who was looking back through the window. Jason’s father had come along at his son’s request as a precaution._

_“I’m taking Kellin home with me. He’s part of my family now.” Jason told the man, his voice filled with confidence and authority. “If you lay a hand on him or me, my father will have you in jail faster than you can think.”_

_Kellin’s father snorted at his threat. His lips contorted into a sardonic grin as he shook his head incredulously._

_“I know people.” He answered, glaring into Jason’s eyes. “I’d be walking out in a week.”_

_“Not with two broken legs.” Jason spat back, glaring right back into the older man’s eyes._

_Kellin’s father grit his teeth as his eyebrows furrowed with indignation. He stepped closer again, closing the gap between him as he towered over Jason angrily._

_“Listen here you little stick licker, I don’t care if your old man’s police or not.” He growled. “I’ll beat you senseless if you threaten me again you fudge packer.”_

_“You’ll try.” Jason hissed. He refused to back down or be intimidated by the brute in front of him._

_The older man’s hand shot forward violently and gripped Jason’s neck. His grip was firm but not tight enough to choke Jason. He raised the beer bottle in his other hand._

_“Don’t you touch him you bastard!” Kellin shouted from the other doorway._

_For the first time in his life, Kellin stood up to his father and rushed to rescue Jason from the old thug. As he rushed towards the two of them, his father’s grip on the beer bottle changed. Jason noticed this and tried to speak but everything happened far too fast for him to get any words out. As soon as Kellin reached them his father swung the beer bottle straight into the side of his head, the glass smashing into bits from the impact as beer spilled onto the carpet. Kellin dropped to the floor with a howl of pain as blood ran down his face from where the glass had cut him._

_Jason snapped. No one hurt Kellin. No one. He thrust his leg up in a powerful kick that struck Kellin’s father in the groin. The man released his group and doubled over in pain but Jason’s attack had only just begun. Jason grabbed the man’s head in his hands and forced it down to meet his knee, bursting the man’s nose open and breaking it with the strike. The older man stumbled back as blood ran down his lips and dripped off his chin. Jason wasn’t done. He punched the man in his already broken nose to force him to stumble back yet again._

_When Jason rushed the older man again he received a powerful knee to the gut. He doubled over as the wind was forced from his lungs, leaving him breathless and gasping for air. Kellin’s father brought his fist down firmly onto the side of Jason’s head, knocking the teen to the floor. Jason continued to gasp for breath, trying to get air back into his lungs after being winded but a large knee was pressed onto his chest, adding pressure before a large fist slammed into his face. Jason gasped out in pain and from lack of air as he tried to fight back weakly._

_The distinctive click of a gun hammer being pulled back sounded in the room causing everyone to freeze in place. This gave Jason time to get some air in his lungs before he turned towards the source of the sound. Standing in the living room doorway with a Smith & Wesson Model 29 revolver in his hands was Jason’s father. He was furious. _

_“Get off him, now!” He barked._

_Kellin’s father did as he was told and stood up._

_“Put your hands against the wall.” Jason’s father gave his second order._

_The man did as he was told, blood still dripping from his face and down his stained tank top. Jason’s father made his way towards him and handcuffed him before holstering his revolver._

_Jason coughed and groaned in pain as his father helped him to his feet. His lip was bleeding, he was coughing from the lack of air in his lungs and his head throbbed painfully._

_“Are you okay?” Jason’s father asked him quickly, checking his injuries._

_“I’ll be fine, I promise.” Jason answered, seeing the concern and fear in his father’s eyes._

_Jason felt embarrassed. His smart mouth had got Kellin injured and his overconfidence had nearly got him beaten to death. Although Kellin’s father was a large man he hadn’t expected him to be such a strong fighter. His own father had to rescue him at gun point. This was not his best moment._

_“I’ll get him down to the precinct then I’ll get you boys home, okay?” His father told him. “Your mother can take a closer look at those cuts.”_

_Kellin’s father sniggered as he leaned against the wall, his hands cuffed behind his back._

_“Didn’t know the cops were so cosy with cocksuckers.” He snarled as he spat out some blood onto the floor._

_Jason’s father turned around and stood to his full height. He stepped forward and squared up to the bulkier man with his hand resting on the handle of his revolver. His stare was ice cold as he contemplated all the things he wanted to do to the man for harming his son._

_“I’m not here as a cop. I’m here as a father.” Jason’s father finally answered. “Something you’re obviously not.”_

_Kellin’s father spat out more blood but this time it was in the face of the police officer in front of him. Jason’s father pulled out a handkerchief from his back pocket and wiped the blood off his face. Kellin’s father grinned as if victorious. Jason’s father whipped out his revolver from the holster and slammed the handle into the larger man’s temple, causing him to collapse to the floor unconscious._

_Jason’s father turned back round to the two teenagers behind him. Jason and Kellin now had an arm around each other as they inspected their injuries and whispered words of comfort between them. He pulled out his mobile phone and dialled a number, raising the phone to his ear. A few moments went by before a voice sounded on the other end._

_“Shane, are you on duty right now?” Jason’s father asked the man on the other end._

_Jason tried to listen in to the conversation but he was too far away from the phone and could only hear his father’s words._

_“Do you and Officer Grimes mind coming down here?” He continued. “I’ve got an unconscious assailant here and need to take my son home.”_

_There was a pause while the man on the other end responded._

_“Domestic dispute and assault. Knocked the guy out.” He explained. “Can’t stand the guy. He’s cuffed and ready to be picked up.”_

_A few more moments of silence passed._

_“Thanks Shane, I owe you one.” Jason’s father finished and hung up._

Jason slowly regained consciousness. The back of his neck was cold where the cool air of the church brushed against it yet his front was warm and the heavy weight of someone’s arm was around him. Momentarily forgetting his sleeping arrangements he opened his eyes to find the source of the warmth and the owner of the arm. Beautiful blue eyes stared back into his own as his brain quickly processed the tired face of Carl.

“What’s up?” He whispered to the younger teen, knowing it was still night.

“Can’t sleep.” Carl murmured back.

Jason raised his hand to stroke some loose hairs out of Carl’s face before thinking on how to get the boy to sleep. There weren’t many easy ways to do it without the commodities of the world they used to know.

Carl’s face started to heat up in slight embarrassment. He knew something that would probably work but he was nervous about asking Jason to do it. After averting his gaze from Jason’s face his eyes settled back on Jason’s own. Inside those eyes was nothing but concern and adoration. It relaxed Carl enough to make his suggestion.

“My mum used to sing me to sleep and Beth sometimes did back at the prison.” Carl explained softly. “Could you do the same?”

His voice quivered on the question, embarrassment still flooding him as he felt like a child for asking for what would essentially be a lullaby. However, Jason simply smiled in response and nodded his head softly. Before he could start, Carl spoke up again.

“Did you ever sing much before?” Carl asked. The question came out of the blue as usual.

Jason smiled and nodded. “My friends and I started a band.”

“What for?” Carl asked, naïve to the musical ambitions of young people before the apocalypse.

“Because we enjoyed it and we wanted to raise money for conservation.” Jason explained.

Although the world before the apocalypse felt like a lifetime of heartache ago, Jason couldn’t help but smile as he reflected on those years. A few of his closest friends had similar music tastes to him and had wanted to start a band. Originally it had been for fame and fortune but the idea had come to Jason to be charitable about it too. As he helped out in a wildlife sanctuary he had made an agreement with the managers to donate some of the money earned to conservation. It had been the start of something potentially very special but like everything else it was brought to a sudden end when the dead had started eating the living.

“I miss Beth.” Carl admitted with a sigh.

To Carl, Beth had been like the older sister he never had. She was sweet and always had time for him and Judith. He never failed to tell her that he appreciated how much she helped take care of his little sister, Judith. On stormy, cold nights at the prison or after particularly close calls, she would often sit in his cell with him. They would talk about whatever came to mind, read some of the comics together or Beth would softly sing to him so he could eventually fall asleep. He missed it greatly. Knowing that she was likely still alive and there was a chance that he’d get to see her again made him desperate to do so.

“You’ll see her again.” Jason answered softly, observing the heartache in Carl’s blue eyes.

“I hope so.” Carl replied, his voice so soft it was practically a whisper.

“You will.” Jason repeated and rubbed Carl’s back gently.

Carl smiled back at Jason’s optimism as the older teen began to softly sing so as to not wake any of the others. He stared into Carl’s eyes the entire time.

“I’m a world away from you, but here you are standing beside me.” Jason sang softly. “What’s in your heart I wish I knew, maybe then I’d see an open space for me.”

Jason smiled back at Carl as he sang.

“To turn around and take from me any chance to see the truth. The doorway is nearly shut, lock the chains and let me through.” Jason continued. “The pain you feel I feel it too, say the words and I will take it away from you.”

Carl started to listen to the lyrics more closely. He wasn’t sure if this was just a song Jason liked or if he was trying to say something with it.

“And I will be, I will be your hiding place, somewhere to rest and hide your face.” Jason sang. “I will be your hiding place, somewhere you can go.”

Jason took one of Carl’s hands in his own and gave it a gentle squeeze as he continued the song.

“You’re underwater and I’m staring down at you, so I reach out to take your hand.” Jason continued, squeezing Carl’s hand again. “But reach much further down and I’ll be drowning too, so I will just sit here and wait for you to swim back up.”

Carl felt himself relaxing as he listened to the song. It obviously meant several things many of which he was too tired to understand. He was getting lost in Jason’s eyes and the sound of his voice.

“Don’t you turn around and take from me any chance to see the truth, the doorway is nearly shut, lock the chains and let me through.” Jason continued, leading up to the chorus again. “The pain you feel I feel it too, say the words and let me take it away from you.”

Jason knew they both carried so much pain and he was determined to be Carl’s shoulder to cry on. If he could he would try and ease the pain the younger teen felt by replacing it with as much love and positivity as possible.

“And I will be, I will be your hiding place, somewhere to rest and hide your face.” Jason sang the chorus again, squeezing Carl’s hand again. “I will be your hiding place, somewhere you can go.”

Jason quickly moved his head forward and kissed Carl on the end of his nose. This caused Carl to blush in surprise as he hadn’t expected the kiss and was still getting used to that kind of affection. The simple things got to him the most.

“And I, I don’t know how to love you this way anymore.” Jason sang a note higher. “It’s you who has to choose if this is worth fighting for.”

Carl smiled again. Their love, their relationship would always be worth fighting for in his mind and heart.

“And I will be your hiding place, somewhere to rest and hide your face.” Jason hit the chorus again. “I will be your hiding place, somewhere you can go.”

Carl felt his eyes getting heavy and let them close as he continued to listen to Jason’s singing. Lying beside Jason made him feel safe and for a while he could forget that the world had ended outside of their embrace.

“I will be your hiding place, somewhere to rest and hide your face.” Jason finished the song softly. “I will be your hiding place, somewhere you can go.”

Jason smiled as he saw that Carl’s eyes were closed and his breathing was steady. He was fast asleep again and looked so peacefully adorable. Jason gently snuggled closer to Carl and closed his own eyes so that sleep could take him once again.

_He woke to the deathly silence and its accompanying smell. His eyes fluttered open as sunlight streamed in through the dirty living room window and landed on his face. Though he had managed to sleep for a few hours he felt as if he hadn’t slept at all. His eyes were red and sore from crying and his jacket and face were stained with dry blood._

_Jason slowly sat up and rubbed the sleep from his eyes. He didn’t want to be alive. If the gun had any ammo in it he would have shot himself in the head already. A few feet away, covered with one of the curtains, was Kellin’s lifeless body. The pool of blood under his head had dried, marking the wooden floor._

_Jason stared at his boyfriend’s body. Not even a day before he had been the same Kellin he had met in the club all those years ago. A hyper, funny boy who was sensitive to people’s feelings and always had a smile on his face. Kellin had always been positive when he was with Jason, even after all the death he had witnessed. As long as Kellin and Jason were alive and together, they would always be happy and strong._

_Now those lips that Jason had felt pressed against his own so many times would never smile again. Now those eyes that had always sparkled with positivity stared blankly ahead. Now the skin that had always been so soft and smooth to the touch was cold and rigid. All the life, joy and energy that had animated that body was gone. Kellin was gone. Now there was just Jason and he was alone._

_Half an hour later Jason returned to the living room. His boots and cargos were dirty from digging up soil in the back garden. He bent down on one knee and picked Kellin’s lifeless body up in his arms. Slowly and carefully he carried him outside, just like he used to carry Kellin to bed when he would fall asleep watching movies._

_Jason stepped outside into the sunlight and onto the back porch of the house Kellin had died in. He walked over the dark wood and onto the grass as he carried his lover’s corpse towards the grave that he had dug. He struggled with the weight of the body as he bent down on one knee and carefully placed Kellin into the grave._

_Dark patches appeared on the curtain fabric that was wrapped around Kellin’s body as tears fell from Jason’s eyes and into the grave. Sniffing loudly as he tried to calm himself down enough so that his tears didn’t obscure his vision, Jason stood up and grabbed the shovel he had used to dig the hole. Slowly he began shovelling the soil into the grave which gradually covered Kellin’s body and allowed him to disappear into the ground._

_The air around him was still. Silence echoed around him as no birds chirped nor did any walkers rasp or snarl in the street. It was as if mother-nature herself was holding a moment’s silence for Jason’s loss. Jason finished by decorating the grave with smooth garden stones he had found circling an overgrown flowerbed._

_He bent down on one knee again at the foot of the grave, staring down at the soil as if Kellin could see him and was staring back. He pulled out a small book he had found in the house the night before and turned it to one of its many pages. Each page was filled with wise and emotive quotes on a range of topics. Though there was no service, no headstone, no proper funeral, Jason felt that Kellin deserved some kind of poetic tribute in his lonely funeral and decided to read from the page._

_“I cannot say, and I will not say,_   
_That he is dead, he is just away._   
_With a cheery smile, and a wave of the hand,_   
_He had wandered into an unknown land_   
_And left us dreaming how very fair_   
_It needs must be, since he lingers there._   
_And you-oh you, who the wildest yearn_   
_For an old-time step, and the glad return,_   
_Think of him faring on, as dear_   
_In the love of There as in the love of Here._   
_Think of him still as the same. As I say,_   
_He is not dead, he is just away.”_

_Jason closed the book and wiped away his tears with the back of his hand. He finally stood up but continued to stare down at the grave. For the first time in his life he felt truly empty, as if all the light, happiness and positivity in the world had died with Kellin. He wanted nothing more than to die and join his lover but he had made a promise that he had to keep. Jason knew that when the time was right they would meet again._

_“Kellin, I have loved you every day since the day I first met you.” Jason spoke to the grave, his voice wobbling violently. “Now I will miss you every day as well.”_   
  


The doors of the church slammed shut as Michonne, Daryl and someone else marched inside. Rick and the others who had been sleeping in the church hall were instantly awakened by the noise of the sudden entrance. Jason was also woken by the noise but was surprised to see that Carl was still fast asleep. The older teen carefully slipped off the couch so as to not disturb Carl’s sleep and headed for the office door.

He opened the door slowly and stepped out, closing it behind him so the noise didn’t wake Carl. The group had already gathered and he could make out the shape of Daryl in the darkness. The archer had returned but Carol was still missing. In her place was a lanky black teenager who he didn’t recognise. Whatever the group was discussing it was hushed and serious. Jason wasn’t sure whether or not to move from where he stood as no one had yet noticed him.

Before he could make a decision Rick looked over and spotted him. Now that Rick was aware that he was listening in, Jason decided to slowly walk over to the group that was still in heavy discussion. He grit his teeth as pain shot through his leg again. The pain from the gunshot wasn’t as bad as it used to be but it would spike on occasion.

“Is Carl asleep?” Rick asked the advancing teen.

Jason nodded. “Yeah. What’s going on?”

Rick took a moment to consider how to word the information he had to convey. “Daryl and Carol found the people who took Beth.”

Jason’s face lit up at that news, he knew that Carl would be delighted to know that his surrogate sister was still alive and safe. His face fell when he took in the serious concern etched on Rick’s face.

“They took Carol. The boy over there is Noah.” Rick explained, gesturing to the lanky teen. “He knows Beth. He told us there’s a lot of armed people there.”

Jason realised where Rick was going with this explanation. “So you need to take them back by force.”

Rick nodded, his hand resting on the handle of his holstered Colt Python. He looked around the church in thought and wasn’t interrupted as Jason waited for him to speak again.

“We need to make this place safe.” He commented. “Most of us need to go to Atlanta to get Beth and Carol back.”

“How do we make it safe?” Jason asked. His idea of a safe place to stay had never been very elaborate.

“We use what we can. Pews, organ, whatever we can find.” Rick explained, looking around at the dark interior of the small church. “Use them to barricade the doors. Stop walkers or people from getting in.”

“I’ll help with that.” Jason offered, looking around for the first thing he could use.

“No. Go sleep some more.” Rick countered. “Stay with Carl. We’ll start in a couple hours.”

Rick placed his hand on Jason’s shoulder and gave it a light squeeze. The action itself was simple but it was a message that Jason understood in full. Rick trusted him and was no longer angry over what happened at the lake. The new focus was on rescuing Beth and Carol. Jason sighed and nodded. Rick let him go and allowed him to limp back to the office.

Jason closed the office door behind him and leaned against it for a moment. There never seemed to be a break from the violence in the apocalyptic world and he hated it. They couldn’t just stay somewhere and relax. He missed having a home. He missed having his own room. He missed music, television, video games and going out to the movies.

“What’s going on?” Carl’s voice broke Jason from his thoughts.

Jason opened his eyes, not remembering when he had closed them and looked over to the couch where Carl sat up, wearing a curious expression on his face. Jason smiled softly and walked over to him before he sat down beside Carl on the couch.

“It can wait till morning.” Jason answered. He knew that Carl needed to sleep and didn’t want to get him excited.

“But I want to know.” Carl insisted, his face serious.

Jason observed Carl’s serious face. The intensity of his blue eyes and the way he pursed his lips and furrowed his brows. He couldn’t help but find something attractive about that expression.

“It can wait.” Jason repeated and kissed the boy beside him.

Carl was annoyed that he was being kept in the dark and decided to get up and demand to be told by someone. His body betrayed him as it refused to move and the only action it did take was to open his mouth wide for a yawn.

“See, you’re still tired.” Jason commented, gently easing Carl to lie back. “Let’s sleep some more.”

The fatigue of his body forced Carl to accept Jason’s decision to sleep. With another smaller yawn he curled himself closer to Jason and let his eyes fall shut once more.

 

Loud bangs and the splintering of wood echoed in the church hall. The banging was constant and consistent as Sasha used an axe to cut up the church pews. They needed the wood to barricade the church doors and they didn’t need all the pews for their group to be comfortable. Daryl watched her smash the church pew at her feet repeatedly while Tyreese struggled to remove the pipes from the church organ. Overnight Daryl had been told about the death of Bob and the attack from the Termites. Guilt had washed over him for not being there but it was countered by his discovery of Beth.

Daryl took the pipes outside and stuck them into the ground around the stairway. They would work as an effective barricade against stray walkers and would stop any from getting near the front door. Gabriel watched as he planted the pipes in dismay. This group were desecrating his once beautiful church.

“Are you gonna take the cross too?” Gabriel asked sarcastically.

Daryl shoved a pipe into the ground. “If we need it.”

Round the side of the church, Rick, Michonne, Jason and Carl were working in pairs to barricade the windows. Rick and Michonne were careful and relaxed as they hammered the nails into the wood but Carl was far more wild and forceful. When he had woken up he had wanted to go with his dad to rescue Beth but Rick had flatly denied him. He was angry. Yet again he had been pushed aside as the weak link in the group. The boy who was too young to help.

“He wants to go to Atlanta.” Rick told Michonne, watching his son and Jason work together. “But I can’t have that.”

“Then you stay.” Michonne replied. She didn’t want any tension between Rick and Carl. “I’ll go.”

“I owe it to Carol.” Rick answered with a shake of the head.

Michonne smiled softly at his loyalty. “We _all_ owe Carol.”

Rick tilted his head in thought. He had been the one to make the decision to expel Carol from the prison. He had coldly sent her out onto the road for trying to do stop the disease. He had punished her for having the best intentions. Despite that decision, Carol had rescued them from Terminus. She had helped Tyreese keep Judith safe. She didn’t have to do either of those things.

“I owe her more.” Rick finally answered.

Carl continued to hammer the wood strongly. Jason watched him for a few moments, surprised at how accurate he was being despite the anger behind every hammer blow.

“Your dad wants to keep you safe.” Jason spoke softly. “Atlanta will be dangerous.”

“Too dangerous for a kid.” Carl spat back, not looking at Jason.

Jason sighed and grabbed the arm Carl was using to hammer with. He lowered Carl’s arm which prompted the younger teen to turn and stare into his eyes from under his sheriff’s hat. Jason studied the look of hurt in Carl’s eyes.

“Too dangerous for his son.” Jason corrected him. “It wouldn’t matter if you were my age. He loves you and wants you to be safe.”

“I can handle walkers. I’m a good shot.” Carl continued to argue. “I can help!”

“I know you can help. So does your dad.” Jason answered, placing his hands on Carl’s shoulders. “That’s why he’s giving you the most important job. Protecting your sister.”

Carl fell silent at that. Jason did have a point as that was an important responsibility, especially with most of the group heading to Atlanta soon.

“I offered to go to Atlanta in your place and he still said no.” Jason continued, his thumbs rubbing Carl’s shoulders gently. “Because he wants me here to keep you safe. He wants me to stay with you.”

“I want to see Beth again.” Carl responded. “I want to be there to rescue her.”

Jason pulled Carl into a hug. He knew the sense of responsibility Carl felt but he also trusted Rick’s judgement. The man had kept his group alive and together through the nightmarish world they lived in, he made the right calls when calls had to be made. Jason felt safe with Rick.

“Like I said last night, you’ll see her again.” Jason answered. “I promise. It’ll be just like old times.”

As he hugged Carl, Jason looked past the boy to observe what Gabriel was doing. He didn’t like the man but he was grateful he had allowed them to stay in the church.

Gabriel’s body quivered as he ran his hand along the message carved into the wood of the church. The last message to him from a member of his congregation on the night he locked them out and left them for the dead to eat. He knew he would burn for eternity for his sins.

Jason also noticed that Rick and Michonne had disappeared. He rubbed Carl’s back before pulling away from their embrace. He smiled at Carl before turning him around and wrapping an arm around his shoulders.

“Let’s head inside and maybe get some breakfast.” Jason told him. “The others will be leaving soon.”

Carl nodded and allowed Jason to lead them round and back inside the church. Once they entered they found Rick walking around slowly with Judith in his arms. Rick seemed to be in some kind of trance as he cradled the baby in his arms. Judith was a simple of hope, a light in the darkness of the world around them. She was a reminder of what innocence was. Rick kissed the top of his daughter’s head and handed her to Michonne.

Rick turned to Carl and pulled his son in for a tight hug. He often didn’t show much physical affection to Carl but there was always that chance that he could die in Atlanta. He wanted to make sure Carl wasn’t still angry with him and that his son knew how much he loved him. He broke the embrace and turned to Jason, who stood silently watching. Rick placed his hand on Jason’s shoulder and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

“Keep him safe.” Rick told him. “I’m trusting you with his life.”

Jason placed one of his hands on top of Rick’s hand and nodded. “I promise.”

Jason let go of Rick’s hand and in turn Rick let go of Jason’s shoulder. The bearded leader turned to Carl again and stared into his eyes, resting his hand in the crook of the boy’s neck.

“We’ll be back soon.” He told him. Rick had no intention of letting anyone die.

“I know.” Carl nodded. Despite his annoyance, he did trust his father explicitly.

Rick picked up a backpack full of weapons and supplies and headed out the door with the others. He closed one of the church doors behind him as Michonne closed the other from the inside. With a subtle bang that echoed around the church hall, the doors closed. At the loss of her father, Judith started to cry as her infant mind couldn’t understand why her daddy had just walked away without her.

Michonne did her best to comfort Judith with her experience as a mother. Judith’s crying only intensified as she reacted to the loud banging that came from the door. Jason and Carl worked together to nail some large planks of wood across the front doors so that they couldn’t be opened from outside. The banging of hammers echoed violently around the church hall.

Gabriel walked up the centre of the church hall as the hammering continued. He observed the destroyed pews, the splinters of wood that lay on the floor before his eyes rested on something far worse. Blood stains. The blood had belonged to the Termites and between Rick’s mutilation of Gareth and Jason’s mutilation of the man who threatened Judith, there was a very large, dark crimson stain on the wooden floor of the church. It sickened him.

Gabriel bent down and started scratching at the wood with his nails in an attempt to forcefully rip the dried blood from the wood beneath it. No matter how fast he scratched, there didn’t seem to be any difference except for the splintering of his nails. He clenched his fist in frustration before spitting on the hard bottom of his hand. He resumed his attempt to clean the stains with his hand, scrubbing his hand against the wood furiously.

 

The van sped along the dirt road away from the church and towards Atlanta. Outside it was a beautiful day of clear blue skies and blazing sunshine. None of that mattered as the group inside the van, Rick, Daryl, Tyreese, Sasha and Noah only had one thing on their minds. Rescue Beth and Carol. Thanks to Noah’s inside information that he shared with them the night before they knew where their destination was. Grady Memorial Hospital in Atlanta.

In the back of the van, Tyreese kept his eyes focused on his sister, Sasha. He could tell that despite her willingness to help on the rescue mission, she was still in a deep state of mourning after Bob’s death. It made him question her judgement and whether she should even be on the mission in the first place.

“Yeah?” Sasha asked after catching him staring.

“You know I’ve been there.” Tyreese reminded her, referring to his girlfriend who was killed at the prison.

“I know.” Sasha answered lowly.

“Bob, he would have wanted you to…” Tyreese began, trying to help her move on.

“Don’t.” Sasha cut her brother off quickly. “I’m sorry but please don’t. Okay?”

Tyreese didn’t speak but his expression showed understanding. Sasha turned her head back so she was facing the wall ahead of her and breathed slowly to stop herself from crying.

 

The awful sound of Gabriel rubbing his hand against the wooden floor, the friction practically burning the skin was enough to drive Jason crazy. Michonne was preoccupied with Judith and Carl was double checking all the boards and barricades. He had adopted this meticulous habit from his father. Jason sighed audibly and headed for the back of the church towards the side room. He found a small closet door and opened it to find various janitor’s supplies.

Jason looked down at the floor of the closet and found a slightly dirty bucket. Apart from the dirt it had no holes in it and appeared to be perfectly usable. Inside it sat a floor scrub. Perfect. Jason lifted the bucket out of the closet and closed the door behind him before returning to the church hall. As he poured some water into the bucket he could feel Michonne’s ever vigilant eyes upon him.

Once the bucket was half full he lifted it from the church pew and walked over to where Gabriel remained on his knees, scrubbing furiously with the base of his hand. Jason placed the bucket down on the floor next to Gabriel with a deliberate thud that made the priest look up at him. Jason didn’t understand why it mattered so much to Gabriel that there was dried blood on the floor but he wasn’t going to stop him cleaning if it kept him busy. He handed the religious man the floor scrub. Gabriel responded with a quiet thank you and immediately began scrubbing at the stains on the floor with much more success than he had previously.

Jason looked to the far side of the church where Michonne was cradling Judith. Carl had finished his inspection of the barricades and was now spending time with his little sister. Jason didn’t move. He simply stood and watched. It always warmed his heart to watch Carl act like a big brother instead of a guard, soldier or killer. He deserved to be happy and experience some sort of normality.

When Carl looked up and spotted him staring, he finally decided to move towards them and join them. Jason sat next to Carl, a lot closer than he normally would considering Rick wasn’t there. Despite Rick’s acceptance of their relationship there were still things that Jason didn’t feel comfortable doing around the man. Within himself he couldn’t tell if it was from fear or respect.

Given how loud Gabriel’s scrubbing was and the distance between them and the priest, Jason decided to voice a few of his thoughts to Carl and Michonne.

“We need to do something about him.” Jason commented with a sigh.

“What do you mean?” Michonne asked quickly with narrow eyes, she suspected some sinister implication.

“He has never killed a person or a walker. He shies away from violence.” Jason explained. “That needs to change or he’ll get himself or someone else killed.”

“Okay.” Carl spoke up and stood up.

Jason watched the younger teen as he walked over to one of the pews and picked up the bag of weapons. Most of the weapons were blades and clubs for dealing with walkers. Carl carried them over to where Gabriel was cleaning. He started laying the weapons down in front of the priest. Several large knives, an axe, a machete, a shotgun, a rifle and a revolver.

“Pick one.” Carl told him as the man continued scrubbing the floor and shook his head.

“You need to learn how to defend yourself.” Carl continued, glancing over to a doubtful Jason. “We can teach you.”

Gabriel stopped scrubbing and placed his hands together on his knees as he looked up at the teen.

“Defend myself?” He retorted. “They said they’d go.”

Jason, Michonne and Carl all looked at him, surprised at his naivety. He appeared to believe the Termites would have left him alone.

“They were liars and murderers.” Carl answered.

“Just like us.” Gabriel countered, earning a roll of the eyes from Jason.

“We protected ourselves. They wanted us dead.” Carl retorted. “You’re lucky your church has lasted this long. You can’t stay in one place anymore. Not for too long.”

As cold and pragmatic as the young teen’s words were, they were true. It was one of the sad truths that Jason and Michonne recognised all too well. Jason lamented the truth of the statement as he felt Carl deserved better than that. That they all deserved better than that.

“And once you’re out there, you’re going to find trouble you can’t hide from.” Carl continued to lecture the pacifist priest. “You need to know how to fight.”

Gabriel stared at the weapons with disgust. He was a peaceful man, a man of God who could not be violent for the Lord did not allow it. Yet here he was being lectured and told by a young teenager that he had to forget the Lord’s teachings and become a violent murderer like the boy and his group. He finally leaned forward and hesitantly picked up the machete. It was heavy in his hand, awkward to hold and felt like sin.

“Good choice. But you’re not holding it right.” Carl commented, observing the priest awkwardly hold the blade. “You got to be able to drive it down because sometimes their skulls aren’t as soft and…”

Gabriel raised his hand and cut him off. “I’m sorry.”

He remained crouched over the blade, his legs felt weak and a cold shiver ran down his spine. He was being told to sin. He couldn’t allow himself to do so. Gabriel swallowed down the bile rising in his throat and stood up.

“I need to lie down.” He rasped, a cold sweat building on his forehead.

Carl, Jason and Michonne watched with disappointed expressions as he retreated into one of the side rooms at the back of the church. It was going to take a lot of time and effort to break the man away from his pacifism.

 

The rescue mission team had arrived in Atlanta. Rick, Daryl, Tyreese, Sasha and Noah stood inside a warehouse as they planned their attack. They weren’t far away from Grady Memorial Hospital but the city was packed with herds of walkers so they had to be as careful as possible.

“At sundown we fire a shot into the air, get two of them out on patrol.” Rick talked them through his plan. “Then once it’s dark enough that the rooftop spotter won’t see us we go.”

Rick continued to explain the plan while pointing at the map they had drawn on the floor.

“We cut the lock on one of the stairways, take it up to the fifth floor.” Rick explained. “I open the door, Daryl takes the guard out.”

“How?” Tyreese asked, causing Rick to pause.

“Without a struggle. This is all about us keeping this quiet, keeping the upper hand.” Rick answered confidently. “They’re not expecting us. From there we fan out. Knives and silenced weapons. We need to be fast.”

Rick marked key positions and areas on the map. He marked where two guards would be.

“Tyreese, Sasha, take them.” Rick continued. “Daryl, you take care of whoever is in the kitchen. I got Dawn.”

As Noah had explained to them when he had arrived at the church with Daryl, the hospital was controlled by a group of police officers. Dawn was their leader, a cold, calculating and often violent woman who constantly fought for respect among her people.

“If they’re smart, the rest of them will give up then it will be five on three.” Rick continued, confident that his plan would work. “Six on three once we get a weapon to Beth.”

“Twelve on three.” Noah interrupted. “The wards will help.”

“That’s best case.” Tyreese spoke up, nervous about all the ways the plan could go wrong. “What’s worst case?”

The others looked at him. They knew there was a risk involved but it was a risk worth taking if it meant saving Beth and Carol.

“All it takes is one of those cops going down the hall at the wrong time.” Tyreese told them. “Then it’s not quiet. All hands on deck. We’re talking about a lot of bullets flying around.”

“If that’s what it takes.” Sasha commented coldly.

“It’s not. If we get a couple of her cops, alive, out here.” Tyreese explained. “We do an even trade. Theirs for ours. Everybody goes home.”

Rick stood up. Tyreese didn’t want to kill anyone and had even refused to kill the man who had threatened to kill Judith. His objection to violence was beginning to become a problem.

“Yeah, I get it and it _might_ work.” Rick answered, walking up to him. “This _will_ work.”

“Nah, that’ll work too.” Daryl spoke up, disagreeing with Rick for the first time in a long time. “You say this Dawn, she’s just trying to keep it together, right?”

“Trying and doing are two different things.” Noah answered honestly.

Rick turned round to Daryl, surprised that he was behind Tyreese’s plan instead of his own.

“We take two of her cops away, what choices does she have?” Daryl explained. “Everyone goes home, like he says.”

Rick stared at Daryl and considered his point. The trade deal did cover fewer risks but it also ran the risk of Dawn not caring for the two cops they plan to kidnap. At that point things could turn very ugly and they would have no plan B. However, the same could be said for his own plan. He nodded. They would do a trade.

 

Jason sat in the office and looked over some entries in his diary. He had continued to mark the days when possible, both the days since Kellin’s death and also the days since he met Carl. He decided to write a new passage about the group he was with and especially his connection with Carl. He had doubted that he would ever see living people again let alone meet someone new to fall in love with, which he knew was gradually happening. Jason knew that there were plenty of risks involved but he was convinced Carl was worth it.

He was interrupted from his thoughts by the sound of the office door closing. He looked up and spotted Carl resting his back against the door. The boy smiled to him.

“Hey, I was just thinking about you actually.” Jason told him, tapping the page of his diary.

Carl walked over and sat beside him with a soft smile. “Nothing bad I hope.”

“Couldn’t write anything bad about you even if I tried.” Jason answered with a smile of his own and wrapped his arm around Carl.

Carl scooted closer to Jason and leaned his head against Jason’s shoulder, his hat pressing uncomfortably against Jason’s face. With a soft chuckle Jason put his diary down and removed Carl’s hat from his head, allowing his companion to properly lay against him.

“I can’t wait to introduce you to Beth.” Carl spoke up randomly.

Jason moved his head slightly to look at Carl. “Why’s that?”

“Because I met her boyfriend at the farm and then her second boyfriend at the prison.” Carl explained with a soft smile, a mix of happy memory and sad reality. “So I want her to meet my boyfriend.”

“Hopefully she likes me.” Jason joked in mock anxiety.

Carl chuckled lightly. “She will. She’s really sweet.”

“Not as sweet as you.” Jason answered quickly and kissed Carl’s head.

The kiss, though it was soft and innocent, reminded Carl of the night before. He had read Jason’s diary entry about taking Kellin’s virginity and he had initially been embarrassed at how his body had reacted to it. At the prison there had never been the kind of privacy and time to have those sorts of thoughts or to do anything about them. They were still foreign sensations and urges that he had, mostly because they were no use in a zombie apocalypse. Survival was more important than sex. He quickly remembered that Jason hadn’t been angry, in fact he had shown the same desire but had refused because of Rick being around. Jason had promised him that they would do something the next day.

“My dad and the others are going to be gone all day.” Carl commented.

“Yeah, but they’ll be fine.” Jason reassured him. “Your dad is one tough son of a bitch. He still scares me a little.”

“Can we do something?” Carl asked, following up on his original statement.

Jason wasn’t following Carl’s thought pattern and understood the question to be innocent in nature. “Like what?”

“Like you promised.” Carl answered lowly, starting to feel nervous.

Jason took a moment to remember what his promise had been. Then it hit him. He had promised they could be intimate in Rick’s absence and now they had a golden opportunity with only Gabriel, who was likely asleep, and Michonne to worry about. He knew Michonne probably wouldn’t care as she had been the most accepting of their relationship from the start.

Jason swallowed thickly. He wasn’t sure if he was ready to cross this line with Carl but he quickly reminded himself that Carl wanted this. Though it was true that wanting something and having it were two different things, he knew fine well that there were a few things he could do for Carl without going too far too soon.

“Okay. Sit with your back against my front.” Jason told him.

Jason shuffled back so that his back was against the wall and spread his legs so that Carl could sit between them. He quickly removed his fingerless gloves and stuffed them into his jacket pockets. Carl hesitantly leaned back until his back was resting against Jason’s chest. This wasn’t the first time they had spooned but Carl felt his face heat up with the knowledge that this wasn’t going to be an innocent cuddle.

Jason wasn’t sure how to start so he let his instincts take over for a while. This was the first time that he was going to let go of some of his self-control that up until now had stopped him from doing so many things to Carl. He took a breath and gently rubbed his hands over Carl’s chest, pushing the fabric of his shirt in one direction then another. Carl didn’t make a sound, almost as if he was scared that any noise would ruin the moment.

Jason lowered his mouth to the back of Carl’s neck and laid a gentle kiss on it. Carl’s breath hitched in surprise, having not expected it. Jason calmly kissed round to the side of his neck, finding the crook of his neck and kissing it strongly. Carl’s breathing had increased and Jason could feel the subtle thuds of Carl’s increased heartbeats through his chest. As Jason’s mouth sweetly assaulted Carl’s neck, his hands continued to rub the younger teen through the fabric of his shirt. Jason’s hands slowly travelled south until they reached the hem of Carl’s shirt and slipped themselves underneath it.

Carl gasped softly at the sensation of Jason’s hands on his skin. Jason smiled at the reaction as his hands travelled over the expanse of smooth skin and headed back up, pushing Carl’s shirt up as they went. From where he was Jason caught sight of Carl’s flat tummy as his hands reached the boy’s chest with each hand going in opposite directions for a moment.

Carl let out a loud gasp as Jason’s fingers found his nipples and began to rub over them gently and repeatedly. It was a teasing gesture but it felt surprisingly good. The leader’s son had no idea that his nipples could be that sensitive as no one had ever given him a detailed guide of all the body’s pleasure spots. Jason’s expert finger movements on his nipples were of no surprise to Carl as he assumed that Jason and Kellin had done this sort of thing a lot.

Jason continued to kiss and lick at Carl’s neck as his fingers toyed with the nubs on his chest. He loved how much Carl’s body was heating up to his actions and just how very sensitive Carl actually was. The one thing he took most pride in wasn’t physical. It was knowing that for the time being he was taking Carl into a world where walkers, death, pain, survival and misery no longer existed. He was guiding Carl slowly into a world of pleasure where every single action felt good and was without pain. The boy needed it and above all, deserved it.

Carl was loving all of the new sensations flowing through his body. The simple yet strong pleasure that came from his nipples being caressed along with the repetitive kisses upon his neck and shoulder. It felt better than he had imagined it would and he needed more. He gasped in surprise and slight confusion when he felt something else. A hardness against his backside that wasn’t there before. His body shook slightly with adrenaline when he realised what it was.

Jason’s cargos had become painfully tight and restrictive but he reminded himself that this was about Carl. His pleasure could wait as long as it took because all that mattered was Carl’s pleasure. He noticed that Carl was aware of his condition, especially when the younger teen shifted slightly to apply more pressure against it, earning a choked out groan from Jason.

“ _You_ have that effect on me.” Jason whispered seductively in Carl’s ear, smiling as the boy swallowed and breathed heavily with excitement.

When Jason glanced down Carl’s body it was his turn to breathe heavily with excitement as his hands shook nervously. It was restricted by the tough fabric of the jeans he wore, but it was still obvious that Carl was hard. It looked very uncomfortable and Jason had the strong urge to move his hands down there but he remembered that he had to take his time. If Carl changed his mind at any moment he would have to be able to stop instantly. He couldn’t force this.

Carl’s breath came out in short pants as Jason’s hands travelled south, rubbing down the skin of his navel before the rested on the waistband of his jeans. Jason’s right hand slowly rubbed further down and ghosted over the bulge in Carl’s jeans, earning a groan from Carl and a buck of the hips. Carl desperately wanted the pressure to be released.

“Carl, are you sure I can touch you?” Jason asked, swallowing nervously. “We can stop at any time.”

Carl nodded furiously, bucking his hips again. If his neck and chest had felt good he couldn’t wait for what was coming next.

“Carl, are you sure?” Jason repeated. He needed to make sure Carl wasn’t begging out of blind pleasure.

“Yes!” Carl gasped out impatiently. “I’m sure, just, please!”

Jason decided that answer would suffice and allowed his left hand to join his right. His hands shook as he undid the button on Carl’s jeans and pulled down the zipper. He constantly reminded himself to take this slow, he couldn’t afford to lose control, not even for a second. He pushed Carl’s jeans down his thighs as Carl’s member bobbed up proud and straight. It was still hidden under his boxers but the tight pressure of the constricting jeans was now gone.

Carl’s heart was pounding faster than it ever had before in his life. He glanced down and bit his lip at the sight of Jason’s hands so close to his clothed erection. No one had ever touched him there before and even he had only touched himself on a couple rare occasions. He had never been able to finish because of a lack of privacy at the prison.

Jason closed his eyes and took a breath to try and calm himself down. He was just as excited about this as Carl was. Not only was this going to be his first sexual encounter in six months but it was also going to be Carl’s _first_. He was going to be the first person to see and touch Carl in this way and it gave him a great sense of pride and excitement that rushed through his body.

His fingers slipped beneath the waistband of Carl’s boxers and pushed them down along with the boy’s jeans, revealing Carl’s erection to the open air. Carl’s face was flushed crimson with embarrassment and excitement as Jason took in the sight. Carl was an average size for his age and his member throbbed with each heartbeat. Jason didn’t want to keep Carl waiting and slowly wrapped his hand around Carl’s hard shaft. The younger teen practically hissed in pleasure and closed his eyes. The feeling of someone else’s hand on him was indescribable and was so much better than anything Jason had done to him up to that point.

Jason’s legs shook with excitement as he started to move his hand. He pumped slowly at first, savouring every reaction and sound of pleasure from Carl as his hand moved up and down. He started placing wet kisses on Carl’s neck again and started to stroke him slightly faster. The change in speed brought out a deep moan from Carl, a sound that he had never made before and it was a sound that travelled from Jason’s ears right down to his loins. He wanted to hear it again.

Carl moaned again as Jason’s hand moved faster over his hardness. This was unlike anything he had ever felt before and was totally different to the few times he had touched himself. This was so much better. Carl couldn’t seem to keep his breathing in check and his abdominal muscles clenched and unclenched in a way he had never experienced before. His legs felt like jelly as his hands found Jason’s thighs to hold onto as pleasure took control of his body. His eyes were squeezed shut and his head was tilted back against Jason’s collarbones as he continued to moan and gasp, especially when Jason’s hand lingered on the head of his erection before resuming its usual pumping pattern.

Jason grinned with erotic excitement and pride. It was such a simple movement, up and down, up and down. Yet this simple movement had resumed the hardened, weapon savvy, walker killing teen into a hot, jelly like mess of pleasure. He loved it. If Carl’s train of thought hadn’t already derailed then Jason was sure that thoughts of death, misery and fear were impossible to find in the boy so long as his hand continued pumping. He loved hearing the moans that spilled from Carl’s mouth and didn’t even care of Michonne or Gabriel heard. Nothing else in the world mattered right now but providing Carl with as much pleasure as possible.

Carl felt his face continued to heat up to the point of it being slightly uncomfortable. His abdominal muscles were getting tighter and there was a strange coiling sensation in the very pit of his stomach. He couldn’t control the moans that fell from his mouth because he was simply overwhelmed with pleasure. Every time he felt like it couldn’t get any better Jason’s hand seemed to move even faster to bring him yet more pleasure. Carl let out a surprised gasp when Jason bit his neck gently and started to suck at the skin. It was a strange sensation because it hurt yet it was a nice pain. Carl would have considered it more but the pleasure rushing through his body from Jason’s hand on him derailed any further thoughts.

Jason smiled proudly once he had removed his mouth from Carl. He didn’t care that it was in an obvious place, on the contrary, he wanted people to know that the bruise on Carl’s neck meant one thing. He was Jason’s. It was a love bite and a sign to anyone else that Carl was taken. Jason would kill anyone who tried to change that.

“Jason! I’m… I...” Carl moaned out, trying to tell him something but he couldn’t form the words.

Jason kissed Carl’s neck again and increased the pace of his hand. “Are you close? Just let it out. I want you to enjoy this.”

Carl moaned in response to Jason’s voice in his ear. His voice sounded different than before, it was deeper and _hot._ The coiling sensation in the pit of his stomach intensified making him buck his hips, desperate for more friction, more contact, and faster strokes. The pleasure was building up to something and he needed it. His whole body felt like hot jelly and his voice failed to work for anything more than pleasure filled gasps and moans.

“I love you, Carl.” Jason declared in the younger teen’s ear.

That was all it took. Those three words did something that Carl couldn’t explain. He squeezed his blue eyes tightly shut and called out a mix between a moan and Jason’s name. His hands squeezed Jason’s legs as his hips bucked and his orgasm hit him hard. Carl couldn’t feel anything but blinding pleasure as his body bucked and tightened and moved all on its own. The building pleasure had peaked and exploded upon Jason’s declaration to him.

Jason slowed his strokes but continued to gently pump Carl through his first true orgasm. Carl’s essence covered his hand and fingers and ran down the shaft slowly. Jason had many memories of sexual experiences but he was certain that this one claimed second place in the list of the best memories. His own face was flushed, his breathing shaky and his limbs weak from the sensation and sight of Carl building up to his release before exploding in a vocal mess of pleasure. It had been worth the wait.

Carl’s breathing gradually returned to normal and he opened his eyes. He watched as Jason used a handkerchief from one of his pockets to clean up his hand and Carl’s shaft. Jason carefully pulled Carl’s boxers and jeans back up before letting his hands rub the younger teen’s chest and tummy softly.

He kissed Carl’s ear. “How was it?”

Carl struggled to find the words that would accurately describe how he felt. “Amazing.”

Jason smiled and kissed Carl’s neck again, right on the love bite. “I’m glad.”

Carl paused for a moment before turning his head to try and look at Jason’s face. “Did you mean it?”

Jason tilted his head and looked into Carl’s eyes. He had the expectant yet anxious expression of a puppy on his face. Jason knew what he was asking. Had Jason been asked ten minutes previous he would have said that it had been a bit too soon to declare love. In that moment, it had somehow changed. He smiled softly.

“Yes.” He answered. “And I always will.”

Carl smiled at that, his lip quivering as if he was going to cry. The whole experience had been an emotional rollercoaster for him and he hadn’t really expected a declaration of love from Jason.

“I love you too.” Carl replied, turning round to face him properly.

Jason smiled and raised his arms so that they could wrap around Carl’s neck before he pulled the younger teen into him and claimed his lips with his own. The kiss was strong, passionate and for the first time, it was sincerely loving.

 

Noah’s second gunshot echoed around the outside of the warehouses. Rick, Daryl, Tyreese and Sasha remained hidden in one of the warehouses and waited. They could hear the approaching car that was sure to belong to the Grady Memorial Group. They watched as Noah rounded the corner just as they had planned right before a police car shot out of the alleyway and into the open area between the buildings. The police car swerved round in front of the lanky teen and knocked him to the floor. Two police officers immediately got out, a woman and a bald man.

“Put it down, Noah!” The woman barked as Noah hobbled away.

“Put the gun down!” The bald man barked after her.

Noah stopped. He placed the gun on the ground as the female officer approached.

“Turn around, hands up.” She told him, not lowering her gun.

The bald officer walked up behind Noah and tied his hands together with plastic wire. He knew Noah and despite their aggressive entrance they still cared.

“Let me know if it is too tight, okay?” He told Noah quietly.

“I thought you were smart, Noah.” The female officer chastised him. “You didn’t think we wouldn’t hear you?”

The bald officer took a moment to check their surroundings. There were no dead bodies. No walkers. The place was abandoned. Confusion set in.

“Where are those rotters you were shooting at?” The officer asked him, looking around.

From behind the officers, Rick and the others came out with their guns raised. They approached slowly so as to not attract attention until they wanted the attention of the officers. Once they were in position, Daryl whistled. The officers spun round and aimed their guns.

“What is this?” The female officer asked.

“Whatever this is, we can help.” The bald officer offered, though he and his partner were panting with fear.

“You do what we say, we don’t hurt you.” Rick told them, keeping his silenced Heckler & Koch Mark 23.

The bald officer was the first to lower his gun and raise his hands. “Okay.”

Upon his surrender the female officer reluctantly did the same.

“Good.” Rick answered, walking towards them. “Now turn around, put your guns on the floor and kneel.”

Faced with four weapons pointed at them the officers did as they were told. Daryl moved round to the bald officer to tie his hands together while Sasha tied the woman’s hands together. Tyreese untied Noah’s hands.

“We need to talk.” Rick told them. “There’s water if you need some and food.”

“Mind if I ask you something?” The bald officer spoke up as they were both pulled up on their feet.

Rick walked back up to them and waited silently for his question.

“The way you talk. The way you carry yourself.” The bald officer commented. “Are you a cop?”

Rick didn’t answer, he simply glared. If it was that obvious then why bother asking?

The bald officer smiled. “Believe it or not, I was too.”

“That’s Lamson.” Noah told Rick. “He’ll be down for this. He’s one of the good ones.”

The screeching of car tires brought them out of their conversation as an unmarked car sped round the corner. The car came speeding towards the group. Rick and Daryl opened fire at the car while the others scattered but were unsuccessful at killing the driver. They ran for cover while Tyreese covered them with his rifle, striking the passenger of the car. The driver opened return fire with a machine gun, causing them all to duck behind some containers. The two captured officers managed to get in the car before it sped off, a white cross on the back of it.

Sasha fired his rifle and shot the back right tire, puncturing it. The group ran after the car with their guns raised. They heard the car grind to a halt around the corner and were careful upon their approach. A water container on one of the roofs had an evacuation sign on it. There were the remains of tents and motorhomes along with some burned out cars. On the ground were melted bodies, corpses whose flesh had been so badly burned it had become one with the road beneath it. Some of the corpses moved their heads, the only part that had been capable of reanimation after Atlanta was napalmed. The walkers snarled and scratched the ground hopelessly.

The group approached the car, stepping around the melted corpses and kept their guns raised. On the far side of the burnt evacuation centre the two captured cops ran past a burning car and round the corner behind the furthest away building.

“Two. On me!” Rick ordered the others and took off running after them.

The group ran past the car after the two captured police officers. Something inside the car creaked so Daryl stopped and aimed his assault rifle inside the car. He paced around it carefully but couldn’t see any signs of life. The driver had to be somewhere. Daryl made his way towards one of the burnt out motorhomes with FEMA spray-painted on the side. He looked inside it but again failed to find the driver of the car. Tentatively, he opened the door of the motorhome and aimed his gun inside. Nothing.

As soon as Daryl stepped back the driver of the car burst out from behind the door and tackled him to the ground. He dropped the assault rifle as he fell. Daryl kicked the man before he could hit him again and quickly got to his feet. He swung a punch but the man ducked it and grabbed Daryl around his waist before lifting him and pushing the archer to the ground. The man forced Daryl towards one of the reanimated corpses and tightened his grip around Daryl’s neck. The archer pushed at the man with his arms straight in a desperate attempt to stop him from strangling him.

However, the man was taller and was able to squeeze Daryl’s neck despite the archer’s arms being held out straight. As he strangled Daryl he pushed him towards one of the snapping heads that lay on the ground, the teeth clanking together with each attempted bite. Daryl reached one of his hands out in a panicked attempt to find something he could hit his assailant with. His hands ghosted over the face of a walker as it tried to bite his fingers. His hand ghosted over it again, trying to find the right position. The third time he stuck his fingers into the walker’s fragile eye sockets and pulled at the head. The head along with part of the spinal column came loose, allowing Daryl to strike the man in the head with it repeatedly.

The man tumbled off him and moved to continue his attack but a silenced gunshot rang out, the bullet killing the other walker before Rick had the driver in his crosshairs. The man froze. The group had returned with the other officers.

“Okay.” The driver spoke, raising his hands. “You win, asshole!”

The man stood up. Rick’s aim remained fixed on the man’s forehead. His gaze was cold. This man in front of him had almost killed a member of what he considered his family.

“Rick!” Daryl called out in an attempt to stop him as he got to his feet. “Rick!”

Daryl walked behind the driver and raised his arm up. Rick’s gaze followed him but his gun didn’t move from its position.

“Rick!” Daryl got his attention. “Three’s better than two.”

Rick considered it for a moment. His friend had a point as three officers would raise the stakes for their leader, Dawn. He lowered his gun as Daryl tied the driver’s hands behind his back.

 

Daryl, Sasha and Tyreese led the captured officers into the warehouse that they had been using to plan their attack. They headed down the room towards Rick who was examining the map with Noah.

“Your friend, what’s his name?” The female officer, Shepherd, asked. “I need to talk to him, your plans are going to get me and my friends killed!”

“We’re going to make it work.” Sasha countered calmly, walking past her.

“It would work if you had different cops to trade.” Shepherd answered. “Dawn’s running Grady into the ground, a bunch of us want her out and she knows it.”

The group listened to her, anxiety creeping up on them.

“She probably knows Lamson wants to replace her too.” Shepherd continued.

“Dawn doesn’t know that.” The driver, Licari, commented.

“She might and she’s smart.” Shepherd insisted. “There’s a good chance you can’t make this deal work and that’ll leave us all dead.”

The group considered it, anxiety growing stronger as the prospect of failure entered their minds.

“But if you let us go, we’ll take care of Dawn ourselves.” Shepherd continued. “Then we’ll let your friends go and this is over.”

“No, we’re not going to do that.” Lamson countered.

“Do you want to die?” Shepherd asked, surprised.

“No.” Lamson retorted. “Just need you to shut up right now.”

Shepherd fell silent as did everyone else.

“You can make this work but you’ve got to be able to talk to her.” Lamson told them.

“Noah told us all about her.” Sasha responded.

“I’ve known her for eight years, ma’am.” Lamson replied. “I know this woman and my only interest is peaceful resolution. Not dying and sleeping in my bed tonight.”

The others listened in silence to his plea.

“So please, let me help you.” Lamson finished. “Please.”

Daryl turned towards Rick’s direction and ushered him over. “Hey, Rick! You’re gonna want to hear this.”

 

Michonne got up from the pew she had been sitting on. Judith was fast asleep for the time being. She had heard Carl’s quiet moans from the office so she knew better than to interrupt the two of them. There were rarely opportunities for any kind of intimacy in the apocalyptic world and they at least had the decency to be discrete about it. Although she approved of the relationship, she was always vigilant for any signs of abuse from Jason’s side. Michonne wouldn’t hesitate to punish him if he hurt Carl.

The samurai noticed that Gabriel had also been in the other room for a very long time. He had needed to lie down but it seemed to be an unusually long time to lie down for. She walked over to the door and gave it a couple knocks with her fist. The door opened, revealing the ever nervous priest.

“Yes?” He asked, breathing unevenly.

“You uh, you said you weren’t feeling good.” Michonne commented. “You doing okay?”

“I was, I was just resting.” Gabriel answered weakly. His face didn’t look okay.

Judith woke up and started crying out for attention again, her cries echoing through the church hall. Michonne sighed. The baby had more energy than anyone else in the group.

“I know all this is new to you. All of it.” Michonne commented to the priest. “I just wanted to tell you, so that you know, the things that we do, they’re worth it.”

“I already took the machete, what more do you want from me?” Gabriel asked tiredly.

“I don’t want anything from you.” Michonne answered with a smile. “I’m just trying to help.”

“Thank you.” Gabriel finally responded before closing the door.

 

“She’ll tell you she won’t make a deal.” Lamson explained.

Rick was crouched down next to him after having separated him from the other two cops. His connection to Dawn was a reliable source of information.

“She’ll tell you she won’t compromise.” Lamson continued. “But she will. She always does. Just know who you’re talking to.”

Rick checked his watch. “We’re probably heading out in the next ten minutes or so. Anything you need before we leave?”

“Actually, water would be great.” Lamson answered with a smile.

Rick looked over his shoulder at Sasha. “Will do. Thanks, Sergeant Lamson.”

“My name’s Bob.” Lamson answered.

This caused both Rick and Sasha to freeze in place. Bob’s death was still weighing heavily on their hearts.

“You’re still a cop.” Rick replied.

“No. No, the real ones are all gone.” Lamson retorted pessimistically.

Rick didn’t answer and simply walked away, leaving Lamson alone with Sasha.

“Dammit.” Lamson muttered to himself.

Sasha stood over him with a bottle of water in her hand.

“I’m okay.” Lamson shook his head. “I’ll be okay.”

“Me too.” Sasha replied.

“The parking lot, when you were bringing us back up here I saw a rotter.” Lamson explained. “I saw one of the rotters and I knew him.”

Sasha moved a concrete brick and sat down on it in front of him.

“His name was Tyler, I met him at Grady. We were both sent there when shit starting going down.” Lamson explained. “Took two whole days to evacuate everyone. Didn’t sleep. We didn’t eat. But still, it was the two best days of my life.”

Sasha listened to his story in silence. She had lost people and seen them turn before so she could relate. Everyone could.

“I was supposed to drive the last van of survivors to the zone and Dawn pulled me off.” Lamson continued. “She wanted someone she could really trust so she put Tyler on it instead.”

Sasha was starting to connect the dots. Tyler had obviously died when it should have been Lamson instead.

“These people were gonna all be evacuated. I was really pissed.” Lamson explained with a light chuckle. “I saw him out there. Saw him stuck out there melted to the asphalt and all I could think of is, that would’ve been me.”

Lamson shook his head with regret and grief.

“Would’ve been me. He saved my life.” He continued. “He’s been out there the whole time, like he’s a part of the street. Some screwed up, endless joke and there’s nothing I can do about it.”

“So let me help you.” Sasha offered. “Do you remember where he was?”

Lamson nodded slowly. “Yeah, I can take you right to him.”

“We’re not going out there but I’m a good shot.” Sasha replied with a smile. “Show me.”

Lamson looked at her with surprise and nodded. He didn’t expect her to care let alone help.

“Okay.” Lamson stuttered out, still surprised. “South side of the building, you can see him from there.”

Sasha nodded and helped him to his feet. She allowed him to take the lead on their way to the south side of the building in case he tried anything. They approached a door which Sasha opened for him before they made their way across the room and to the far side windows. Lamson stood looking down at the walkers below.

“You see him?” Sasha asked.

“About twenty yards to the right of the Sedan.” Lamson answered and backed away from the window. “There’s a half wall and he’s leaning against it.”

Sasha stepped forward and took aim, peering down the scope of her rifle in search for the reanimated remains of Tyler. After a moment she caught sight of the walker. A red splat on the asphalt where his legs used to be, the flesh of his lower body melted all around him along with his arms. The walker moved its head around slightly, the only movement it seemed to be capable of.

“I see him.” Sasha told him and prepared to fire.

Before she pulled the trigger she realised something didn’t seem right. The walker’s face was just as burned and rotten as any of the others. All of them looked the same because of how long they had been out there and none of them had any identifiable traces of clothes.

“Are you sure that’s him?” She asked, turning round.

As soon as she turned round Lamson rammed into her with all his body weight. Sasha was sent stumbling forward head first into the glass window, the glass cracking as he forehead smashed against it. She dropped to the ground unconscious as Lamson took off running as fast as his legs could carry him.

 

Jason and Carl hadn’t moved. Carl was cuddled into Jason which allowed the older teen to place the occasional kiss on the younger teen’s forehead. It had been a special moment for both of them to have declared that they were in love. Since Kellin’s death there had been no doubt in Jason’s mind that he would never love again. Carl had come into his life to completely overturn that reality and show him that love could often be found in the strangest of places. Though he missed Kellin more and more every day that went by, Carl’s love and company gave him the strength to endure the pain of his loss and complimented it with the pleasure of companionship. Kellin would have wanted him to move on and he finally had.

Carl had never loved anyone romantically before so the relationship was a brand new experience to him. Although he had been nervous at the start, he was glad that he had fought to convince Jason to be with him as it was the one truly good thing he now had in such a dark world. He finally understood why people fell in love and why they wanted to marry, have families and grow old together. He understood what it felt to have his whole body come alive with Jason next to him. He understood love.

“Jason?” Carl mumbled into his boyfriend’s chest.

“Yeah?” Jason asked, his hands rubbing Carl’s back soothingly.

“What about you?” Carl asked, tentatively placing his hand on Jason’s thigh.

Carl was conscious of the fact that Jason had touched him and brought him to his first true orgasm. He had gone out of his way, at request, to take all the misery of the world away for a few minutes and replace it with ecstasy. Carl felt guilty that he hadn’t done the same for Jason. He knew that relationships had to be equal and it would be selfish and lazy of him not to do something.

Jason felt himself twitch at Carl’s suggestion. He found himself adoring the younger teen more and more. Even now Carl was being considerate and wanted to make sure things were fair, to prove himself to be a good boyfriend. Jason smiled and stroked Carl’s cheek before giving him a quick peck on the lips.

“You don’t have to.” He told him. “This was for you.”

“Yeah but you said I made you hard.” Carl argued, his hand moving up Jason’s thigh with nervous inexperience. “I should do the same for you.”

“I know but I want to take this slow.” Jason told him, staring into his eyes.

Jason would be lying if he said every inch further up his thigh Carl’s hand went, the more self-control he lost. He was still aroused and would love nothing more than to let Carl return the favour but he wasn’t sure he could trust himself to not take it further. Carl wouldn’t be ready for that.

“Do you think this can last?” Carl asked Jason, keeping his hand still.

“The relationship?” Jason questioned, earning a nod. “Yeah, of course.”

“Then we don’t need to take it slow.” Carl countered.

Jason hissed as Carl’s hand found his hardness through the fabric of his cargos. He bit his lips and resisted the temptation for his hips to buck up into his boyfriend’s hand. He did want it but he didn’t want it to be a lustful rush. It had to be about love. Jason looked back into Carl’s eyes and saw it. There was a hunger there, an excitement but there was the endearing sparkle of love in those blue eyes. Carl wanted to return the favour out of love, not out of obligation or pressure. Jason pulled Carl in for a kiss, his tongue slipping into Carl’s mouth to duel with the younger teen’s own tongue. He moaned into the kiss as Carl’s inexperienced hand went to work.

Carl broke the kiss and let out a shaky breath as he unzipped Jason’s cargos. Jason’s own hands reached down to help undo them and push them down along with his boxers in one swift movement. Carl bit his lip as he was presented with Jason’s hardened length. It was the first one he had seen apart from his own. He was broken from his thoughts by Jason’s hand grasping his own.

“If you’re too nervous, you don’t have to.” Jason repeated. “There’s nothing wrong with not being ready.”

Carl shook his head and wrapped his hand around Jason’s length, earning a hiss of pleasure. He was surprised by how soft the skin was despite how rock solid the shaft was as it throbbed in his hand with each heartbeat from Jason. This was his first time doing anything sexual to someone and he didn’t expect that he would be any good. He reminded himself that Jason had made him feel good and it was only fair that he did the same so he nervously started pumping his hand up and down.

Jason let out a quiet gasp as Carl started stroking his shaft. Jason was no stranger to sex, having had his first experiences when he was Carl’s age before he met Kellin. He and Kellin had ended up doing a lot of things over the course of their relationship so the pleasure shooting through his body was familiar. However, the fact that it was _Carl_ made it completely unique and different. He was Carl’s first and could potentially be his only sexual partner, making this so much more special than any other experience in Jason’s life.

Carl’s technique was far from perfect but it was more than enough to please Jason. He could tell from the concentration on his flushed face that Carl was trying his best to make it as good for Jason as it had been for him. Jason stroked Carl’s hair, prompting the younger teen to look back up at him. Jason smiled before pulling Carl toward him to capture his lips again.

The kiss was far hotter and more intense than any that came before it. Their tongues battled each other while Jason continued to let out small moans into the kiss as Carl’s hand continuously stroked him without losing its pace. When Carl increased his pace Jason instantly moaned louder and bucked into his boyfriend’s hand.

Jason momentarily broke the kiss. “Faster, please.”

Carl did as he was told and increased the pace of his strokes. He found the repetitive action straining on his arm muscle but he ignored the sting of exertion and focused solely on making Jason feel the same pleasure that he had. Jason captured his lips again while his hands played with Carl’s messy hair. Carl’s inexperienced hand on him felt incredible. He was a quick learner.

Jason had felt that the moment had been perfect when he had pleasured Carl and brought him to his first orgasm. The roles were now reversed and Carl appeared to be enjoying it just as much as he had before. It felt so natural, so right. Jason wondered why he had even be reluctant to get to this point sooner. Carl was a man in so many ways that it was wrong to deny him intimacy. It was wrong to deny either of them such important intimacy. Jason gasped out Carl’s name as the younger teen stroked as fast as he could.

“I’m close.” Jason warned him with a shaky breath as he pulled Carl close again.

It was Carl’s turn to take the initiative to lock lips again. The kiss was strong enough to push Jason’s head back until it bumped against the wall. They both moaned into the kiss as Carl focused on stroking near the head of Jason’s member. The older teen couldn’t tell if this was from memory or by accident but it was a little bit too much. Jason moaned loudly into Carl’s mouth as he spilled into Carl’s hand. It was a particularly strong orgasm that caused his whole body to shake and his hips to buck wildly while Carl continued to stroke until Jason calmed down.

Once he had, he took out another handkerchief to help clean up Carl’s hand and the mess left on his own member. After cleaning up he pulled his boxers and cargos back up so that he was presentable and pulled Carl in for another close cuddle.

“You didn’t have to do that.” Jason repeated. “But thank you.”

“Was it okay?” Carl asked nervously. It had been his first time pleasuring someone.

Jason kissed him gently. “It was amazing.”

 

Rick ran as fast as his legs could carry him. It hadn’t only taken him minutes to realise Lamson and Sasha had disappeared and it had taken him seconds to find Sasha unconscious. He had taken off running after Lamson and he knew he was closing in. There were a few walkers wandering the area but they were of little concern to Rick at this point. A badly decomposed walker turned in the alleyway ahead of him, having heard his fast approaching footsteps. Rick slashed the walker in the abdomen as he whipped past it, its rotting intestines falling to the ground.

Rick reached the police car, assuming that Lamson would try to make it back to his car to radio for help or to drive away. Lamson wasn’t at the car. Looking further down the road, Rick spotted the bald man running as fast as he could. He quickly threw his machete onto the passenger seat and jumped into the patrol car, stepping on the acceleration to speed after the escaping cop.

Rick had to swerve round small clusters of walkers that were also pursuing the terrified man. With an experienced hand, Rick set the radio to the patrol car’s roof speakers and spoke into the microphone.

“Stop!” Rick ordered. “Stop right now!”

Lamson continued to run, ignoring Rick in a futile attempt to outrun the car.

“Stop!” Rick repeated, his patience running out. “I won’t ask you again!”

Lamson continued to run. Rick snarled as his patience ran out and his foot slammed down on the accelerator.

“Oh shit!” Lamson cursed to himself as he heard the car speed up.

Rick sped right towards Lamson and slammed the front of the car into the cop, sending the bald man flying forward before he crashed onto the concrete. He lay still as his limbs refused to move. The impact of his landing had damaged his spine. Blood trickled down his face from his head where it had smashed against the concrete beneath him. He groaned in agony.

“Son of a bitch, you son of a bitch!” Lamson called out weakly. “Help me!”

Rick opened the car door and stepped out. He kept his gun in his hand and walked up to the paralyzed police officer who lay bleeding on the ground, panting from exertion and pain.

“Help me!” Lamson repeated. “You’re crazy, you crazy son of a bitch. I think you broke my back!”

“Didn’t have to be like this.” Rick told him, glaring down at him with contempt. “You just had to stop.”

“I couldn’t. I don’t know you.” Lamson answered. “What I think, I think I’m getting the idea.”

Rick crouched down beside him, glaring into his pain-filled eyes.

“You just had to stop.” Rick repeated.

“Take me back! Take me back to the hospital!” Lamson begged. “I did it for your friend.”

Rick heard the snarls of the approaching walkers and stood back up. He was all out of patience and all out of sympathy. A man like this one couldn’t be trusted.

“Not after this. No.” Rick retorted. “You can’t go back, Bob.”

Rick shook his head. His memory echoed with Gareth saying those very same words at the slaughter trough.

“I was going to iron things out. She’s under it and you’ve been out here too long.” Lamson continued to plead for his life.

Rick pulled out his revolver. The pathetic begging was beginning to give him a headache.

“You’ll die.” Lamson warned. “You’ll all…”

Before he could finish, Rick pulled the trigger and shot him in the head. The gunshot echoed around them and would undoubtedly attract more walkers. Rick knew he was being just as ruthless as the Governor or Gareth before him but unlike them he was doing it to protect his people. Rick was different.

“Shut up.” Rick snarled, more to the ghosts of the Governor and Gareth than to the now dead Lamson.

Rick returned to the patrol car and got in before the walkers could reach him. They still had two captured cops so the deal could go ahead.

 

Michonne lay back on the carpet at the front of the church. Her legs were raised into the air and her hands were holding the back of her head. She raised her body up in intense stomach crunches as part of her workout regime. She had to stay strong and stay in shape if she wanted to survive. The sound of a door opening caught her attention.

Jason and Carl emerged from the office together. Jason had his gloves back on and his backpack was strapped on his back. They were smiling and chuckling at a joke one of them must have told. Michonne couldn’t help but smile at how happy they looked and almost laughed when Carl’s face flushed red with embarrassment. He knew that she had heard them.

“Having a good time?” She asked with a grin. She couldn’t help herself.

While Carl’s eyes shot down to the floor in embarrassment, Jason stared back with a grin of his own.

“An amazing time, actually.” He answered and wrapped an arm around Carl.

“Carl, you know I don’t mind, right?” Michonne asked the younger of the two.

Carl looked up at her but continued to be rather sheepish about it. “Don’t tell my dad.”

Jason nodded. “I don’t think Rick would be happy knowing we’re doing things like _that_ already.”

“Your secret is safe with me.” Michonne smiled back at them.

They both thanked her before heading over to the food containers. Neither of them had eaten since they woke up and were starving. Had it not been for their complaining stomachs they would have still been cuddled up together in the office. It was time for breakfast.

 

Rick returned to the warehouse room where the rest of the group and the two other captive cops were waiting. Sasha was awake again with only a cut on her head to show for what happened. Everyone’s faces turned grim when they realised Rick was alone. They knew what it meant. Daryl walked up to Rick to find out what happened first.

“He wouldn’t stop.” Rick told him. It was all that needed to be said.

“Does this change things?” Daryl asked, worried about Beth and Carol.

“It has to.” Rick replied with a sigh of acceptance.

Daryl thought for a moment. There had to be a way. “Maybe not.”

“Wait, she said the plan won’t work and the guy who did is dead.” Rick countered. “Maybe we gotta rethink this.”

“She also said the cop in charge didn’t have any love for him.” Daryl reminded him. “Maybe you did her a favour.”

“I don’t know if they’ll play ball.” Rick commented, looking over at Shepherd and Licari.

“Let’s find out.” Daryl answered.

Rick and Daryl walked up to the two captive cops who sat on chairs with their hands tied behind their backs. Before either man could speak, Shepherd spoke up.

“He was a good man.” She told them. “He was attacked by rotters, we saw it go down.”

Rick was surprised at her words. He wasn’t sure if she knew Rick had killed Lamson or if she was offering to lie to Dawn. Either way, she sounded totally convincing.

“You’re a damn good liar.” Rick commented.

“We’re hanging by a thread here.” Shepherd answered. “He was attacked by rotters, that’s the story.”

“You said the trade was a bad idea.” Daryl challenged her. “What changed?”

“Lamson was our shot.” Shepherd responded. “So it’s this or you go in guns blazing, right? You don’t want that.”

“That’s some bullshit you’re spinning if things go south.” Daryl snarled.

“I know her. I know the good ones from the bad.” Shepherd explained. “So let us help you.”

Rick considered it for a moment. It was their best chance and if both cops cooperated then it could work out fine and everyone could get to go home happy. He turned to Licari, the man who had tried to kill Daryl.

“What about you?” Rick asked him with narrow eyes. “You wanna live? How much?”

“Dawn’s afraid she’ll look weak in front of us, think it’ll tip things against her.” Licari commented, glancing at Shepherd. “Hell, it will. She’ll see that this trade is a rip-off if she thinks you took out one of our guys. So it’s a good thing Lamson got aced by rotters.”

Rick knew that was the most cooperation he was going to get out of the bald headed cop. He turned to Daryl and they both shared a nod. The deal would go through with Shepherd and Licari covering up the truth about Lamson. Everyone could go home safe and sound.

 

Laughter filled the church hall as Jason had just finished telling an amusing anecdote from life before the apocalypse. Carl had found it hilarious as had Michonne and Jason couldn’t help but laugh as he relived the memory. Their laughter was killed by loud cries for help coming from outside the church walls. What was worse was that they recognised the voice to be that of Father Gabriel. Jason looked over at the office door that was still shut. How had he got past them?

“Please! Let me in!” Gabriel shouted from outside in terror. “Michonne! Carl! Jason!”

That’s when the low chorus of undead growls and snarls coupled with the horrendous stench of death filled the air. A large group of walkers was chasing him down. The three of them ran for the front door which was now being banged on by Gabriel.

“Please! Don’t leave me out here!” The priest shouted desperately.

Jason reached the front door which was still boarded up. The man must have snuck out through the office somehow. By the sounds filling the air there were a lot of walkers outside which meant Judith was in danger. It would be easier to lock the priest out just as he had done to his congregation.

“Carl! Jason! Michonne!” Gabriel shouted in a blind panic. “I had to see it! I know now! Let me live with it!”

Neither of them were sure of what he meant but time was running out. Jason didn’t want to open the doors in case the walkers managed to get inside the church but it would be wrong of them to leave the man to die. He hadn’t done them any harm so he didn’t deserve to have his life to end in such a miserable way.

As Gabriel continued to cry for help, Jason and Carl grabbed the wooden boards that blocked the door and started pulling on them. They regretted being so thorough with the barricade as the boards wouldn’t move no matter how hard they pulled at them.

“Get back!” Michonne warned the two of them as she held the axe.

The two lovers backed up and pulled out their handguns, Carl with his Beretta and Jason with his Operator. Michonne was mindful of Judith strapped to her back as she swung the axe down into the wooden board. She swung again as the wood broke and began to part. The third swing was enough to break the wood into two pieces.

Jason rushed forward and opened the door. He quickly took in the situation as Gabriel rushed inside behind him. There had to be over twenty walkers and all of them were rushing for the door. He backed up and pulled out his gun again while Carl shot three of the walkers in the head.

“Get back!” Michonne ordered and unsheathed her sword.

As the walkers began to pour in she swung her sword and decapitated two of them instantly. A third walker marched up to her and had its head split in two with the katana. Michonne stabbed a fourth in the side of the head and kicked its body back into the crowd of advancing corpses. There were too many for her to deal with.

Shots rang out as Jason gunned down another four. He hesitated as he quickly did the math in his head and realised he didn’t have enough ammo or time to kill all of them. Jason darted forward and pushed the pews in between them and the walkers. The pews were awful barricades but they slowed down the advancing herd enough.

“The directory, come on!” Gabriel shouted and ran back to his office.

Carl followed the man, calling to Jason to join them. He and Michonne quickly rushed after them towards the office. The snarls of the undead were deafening and the stench of decay was almost overwhelming. They barged the door open and slammed it behind them. Before Gabriel could lock it the walkers were already piling against it forcing him to press his entire body weight against it in a fight to keep it shut.

Michonne attempted to help by trying to jam a chair under the doorknob. Jason kept his gun aimed at the door. If the walkers burst through at any moment then they would all be killed unless they came up with a plan and fast.

Gabriel turned and pointed to the floor. Jason glanced to where he was pointing and discovered a hole where the floorboards had been lifted up and removed.

“You can make it out! Crawl through there to the back of the church!” He told them. This was how he had got out in the first place. “Just go! Take the little one and go!”

Michonne moved from her position and handed Judith over to Carl along with one of the supply bags that had been left in the office. Carl descended into the hole but was stopped by Michonne.

“Hey, you wait for us, okay?” She told him, earning a nod from the teen.

Once Carl had started crawling under the church, Michonne turned to Jason.

“Now you!” She ordered.

“I’m staying to help!” Jason argued. “He can’t hold that door shut on his own!”

“Go!” Michonne barked.

Jason took the hint and holstered his gun before hopping into the hole. He took his backpack off and kept it in front of him as he started to crawl through. Michonne sheathed her sword and hopped down right behind him. She turned to Gabriel who was still at the door.

“It’s worth it.” He told her with a shake of his head. “I’m not going anywhere until you’re gone!”

Michonne decided it wasn’t the time for arguing and descended into the hole, crawling under the church just behind Jason. Gabriel struggled with the door, the combined weight of the walker herd was too much for him to fight against. Sweat poured down his head and face as he darted from the door to the hole. As soon as his feet connected with the soft dirt beneath the church the door burst open and a walker came tumbling in. Gabriel lifted his hands up to defend himself but the walker fell face first into the machete that had been stuck in the floor. Taking advantage of his luck, he quickly grabbed the machete and hurried through the hole before the walkers found a way down.

Carl held Judith in his arms with Michonne by his side. Jason stood with them with his machete at the ready. He couldn’t afford to fire his gun and attract the attention of the herd again. Gabriel crawled out from underneath the church.

“I can’t run anymore.” He gasped as Michonne helped him to his feet.

“You’re not running.” Michonne told him.

Carl strapped Judith to his back and took out his knife. He and Jason went round to the front of the church and stabbed the heads of the walkers who got themselves trapped on or between the organ pipes. The bulk of the herd was still in the church and hadn’t noticed them yet. Carl checked the pockets of the dead walkers for any ammunition or other useful items while Michonne made her way to the church door.

She started pulling the doors shut, the squeal of the hinges alerted the herd to her location. She quickly slammed the doors shut before the walkers could reach her. Gabriel grabbed some wooden boards and held them against the door while Jason hammered nails through them to barricade the door. They couldn’t kill all the walkers but they could at least keep them contained inside. The walkers snarled and growled loudly as their grey hands stuck out of the gaps in the door, desperately clawing at anything in range.

 

Tyreese and Sasha stood at the edge of one of the rooftops. Their rifles were pointing down to one of the other rooftops across the street.

“You’re beating yourself up.” Tyreese told her. “Don’t.”

“I was stupid.” Sasha answered, referring to Lamson’s trick.

“At the church, that guy Jason killed?” Tyreese commented, jogging her memory. “His name was Martin.”

Sasha looked away from the sniper rifle’s scope to look at her brother. She didn’t think Tyreese had made it to Terminus to have known any of their names.

“We had him. Me and Carol, back by Terminus. Then she went in after you all and it was just me and him.” Tyreese explained with a shuddered, guilty breath. “I said I killed him. I could’ve done it, maybe I should’ve done it but I didn’t. I keep thinking about it.”

Sasha resumed looking down the scope of the sniper rifle. Her brother’s good nature was going to get him killed if he didn’t learn to accept that sometimes killing was necessary.

“Remember when we were kids, you used to follow me around copying every little thing I did.” Tyreese reminisced. “What happened to both of us, maybe it’s because we’re still the same. Just like we were back then and maybe that’s good.”

“You’re still the same and that is good.” Sasha replied, turning to him again. “I don’t think I can be. Not anymore.”

She looked through the scope again and watched as a police car drove up the street. Daryl, who had joined them to also take aim, snapped his fingers. Tyreese lifted a walkie-talkie and spoke to Rick.

“They’re headed to the vantage point.” He told the group leader.

“Okay, copy that.” Rick answered before holstering his own walkie-talkie.

He stood on the roof of the building that Sasha had been aiming at previously. He heard the roar of the car engine as the patrol car reached the rooftop and walked towards it with his hands raised.

Two police officers got out of the car with their Glocks aimed at Rick. Rick stopped walking and kept his hands in the air at head height.

“Officer Franco, Officer McGinley.” He announced. “I’m Rick Grimes. I was a deputy in the King County Sheriff Department. I’m here to make a proposal.”

“Lay your weapon on the ground.” Officer Franco barked, still aiming his Glock.

“Alright.” Rick replied and used his left hand to unholster his revolver, making it impossible for him to fire it.

He kept his right hand raised as he placed the revolver down on the ground at his feet. Rick was calm in the knowledge that Daryl and Sasha had both police officers in their crosshairs. As the two officers closed the doors of their car and carefully walked towards him he lowered his hands and let them drop to his sides.

“What’s your proposal?” Officer Franco asked him.

“You have two of my people, I have two of yours.” Rick explained. “We want to make an exchange and then we’ll be on our way, no one gets hurt.”

“Who?” Officer McGinley asked, not quite believing him.

“Officer Shepherd and Licari.” Rick answered. “For Beth and Carol.”

Officer Franco narrowed his eyes. He knew Beth but the name Carol he didn’t recognise.

“You picked up a woman yesterday after your people hit her with a car.” Rick told him, noticing his confusion.

The two cops shared a glance. This was no bluff.

“Noah, he’s with you?” Officer McGinley questioned. “That’s how you know?”

“Yes he is.” Rick replied.

“What about Officer Lamson?” Officer McGinley asked. He wasn’t comfortable with that name not having been mentioned.

“He was attacked by the dead before we got to him.” Rick answered without any hesitation.

At the other end of the rooftop parking lot, a walker was slowly staggering towards them.

“Where are your people?” Officer Franco asked.

The distinct sound of a suppressed gunshot reached their ears as the walker dropped dead, a bullet hole in its forehead. The two officers jumped out of reflex, realising they were in the crosshairs of snipers.

“They’re close.” Rick answered flatly. “Radio your lieutenant. I’ll wait.”

 

They watched as the walkers tried to claw their way through the boarded up doors. Michonne stroked Judith’s head gently, making sure the little bundle of innocence was fine. Jason held Carl’s hand, a simple action but one that was both comforting and empowering. They had survived together. They were still together.

Michonne changed position and walked up to Gabriel, who was leaning against the fence because he was still shaking.

“Where did you go?” She asked him.

“To the school.” Gabriel answered. “I had to see. I had to know.”

Jason considered what had happened. The priest had snuck out through the floor without telling them, had injured his foot on the way out. He had then gone to the school, attracted the attention of a herd of walkers and lured them back to the church where Judith was, where Carl was. All because he had to be sure the Termites were bad people? He could have asked to be taken there. He had put Carl and Judith in danger for no justifiable reason apart from his own stupidity.

Jason marched up to him and grabbed him by the collar with both hands. Michonne and Carl stumbled back in surprise at what he was doing while Gabriel clawed at Jason’s arms in terror.

“You better understand now that it is life and death out here at every turn.” Jason snarled, glaring into Gabriel’s fearful eyes. “If anything had happened to the baby or to Carl, I would have fed you to the dead myself.”

“Jason, that’s enough.” Michonne warned. It was not the time to be fighting.

Jason ignored her.

“God isn’t going to save you from this nightmare! He didn’t save all of his other children and he sure as hell doesn’t give a damn about us either.” Jason continued with disgust. “So you better learn how to fight the dead and keep the group safe because I won’t be going out my way to babysit someone who should know better.”

Jason’s words hurt Gabriel, especially the attack upon his faith. He refused to believe that God wasn’t still watching over them but it was true that the world was very different. He nodded his head rapidly in the hope that Jason would let him go and leave him alone. Carl stood next to them and placed a hand on Jason’s arm.

“Jason, that’s enough.” Carl repeated Michonne’s words. “Let him go.”

Jason sighed and let go of Gabriel. His facial expression was still filled with contempt for the priest but he wasn’t going to upset Carl. He refused to even if it meant controlling his anger when he wanted to vent.

Before anyone could say anything the horrifying sound of wood splintering sounded from the church door. The weight of the herd was too great for the wooden boards and they were starting to break from the strain. Michonne clutched her sword while Jason and Carl pulled out their guns.

“Where do we go?” Carl asked.

If they ran away they ran the risk of missing the return of the others. The last thing anyone wanted was for the group to be separated again. As one of the wooden boards clattered to the floor the sound of an engine filled the air. They all watched as a fire truck emerged sped down the road from their right side towards the church. It was aimed right at the small staircase and smashed into it, shattering the wood and blocking the door. The engine was turned off and Abraham stepped out of the driver’s side door. Maggie and Glenn followed him out.

From the back of the fire truck Rosita and Tara also emerged. Maggie and Michonne immediately embraced each other in a friendly hug while Abraham double checked their surroundings.

“You okay?” Maggie asked.

“Yeah.” Michonne answered as they broke apart.

The samurai then turned to Glenn with a smile. “You’re back.”

Glenn’s expression was grim. “Eugene lied. He can’t stop it. Washington isn’t the end.”

Jason felt his legs go weak at that revelation. One of his hidden motivations for giving his relationship with Carl a good try was built on the hope that the world could go back to normal. He had wanted Carl to have an ordinary life, to share similar moments with him as Kellin had before. That was never going to happen. The apocalypse was final. They would just continue to live in fear and misery until they eventually died.

“Where is everybody?” Glenn asked, worried about the absence of the rest of the group.

Michonne walked up to Maggie with a smile. “Beth’s alive, she’s in a hospital in Atlanta. Some people have her but the others went to get her back.”

Maggie’s eyes widened as she became short of breath at the news. She had expected her sister to be dead at this point and had all but accepted it.

“Do we know which one?” She asked, not wanting to wait around.

“Grady Memorial.” Michonne replied, still smiling.

Maggie rubbed her face and head with her hands before hugging Glenn tightly as tears of joy fell from her eyes. Her sister was alive and she was going to see her again. Carl was smiling at Maggie’s reaction as he too was desperate to see the sweet blonde daughter of Hershel. Jason placed a hand on Carl’s shoulder and gave it a squeeze that made Carl turn to look at him. The older teen simply smiled. The reunion with Beth would help him mask his disappointment about Eugene’s lie.

“Let’s blow this joint and go save your sister.” Tara spoke up with what they had all been thinking.

 

Officers Franco and McGinley led Rick and the others down one of the many hallways in Grady Memorial Hospital. Dawn had accepted the deal and everything had been arranged. It was almost over. Rick and Daryl kept their guns on Shepherd and Licari’s backs for added security in case Dawn tried something.

They ascended a staircase onto one of the upper floors. Officer Franco had explained that most of the people in need of medical attention were on that floor and as a consequence that was where Carol was being kept. They walked down another corridor and reached a set of double doors. Rick looked through the small glass window of the door and looked at the other side of the corridor.

A formation of armed police officers stood at the end of the corridor. Behind them were a couple doctors along with Beth and Carol, who was sitting in a wheelchair. In the middle of the formation was a woman who Rick instantly assumed to be the leader, Dawn. Realising that Rick refused to come through the doorway while their guns were drawn, Dawn gave the order for all of her officers to holster their guns. She grabbed her radio.

“Holster your weapons.” She told Rick’s group via her officers.

Rick agreed and told the whole group to holster their guns. They were close now and cooperation was vital for the deal going ahead without any casualties. They opened the double doors and entered the corridor, stopping at the halfway point. Dawn and her officers stood aside to reveal that Beth and Carol were there and unharmed. Officers Franco and McGinley joined their fellow officers on the far side of the corridor.

“They haven’t been harmed.” Rick told them, referring to the cops.

“Where’s Lamson?” Dawn asked with a shake of her head.

“Rotters got him.” Shepherd answered.

“We saw it go down.” Licari added.

Dawn looked unconvinced. “Oh. I’m sorry to hear that. He was one of the good guys.”

“One of yours for one of mine.” Dawn continued.

Rick nodded. “Alright.”

Daryl stepped forward to hand over Licari. He walked down the corridor with him and stopped halfway between the two groups. One of the other officers wheeled Carol down to Daryl. Daryl took Carol and the officer took Licari. Both hostages were returned to their respective groups.

Dawn took Beth by the arm and led her down the corridor while Rick approached her with Shepherd. Rick and Dawn let go of each hostage and allowed them to walk back to their own groups. Rick placed a hand on the side of Beth’s face and greeted her. He was glad to see her considering the last he saw of her was before Hershel had been killed by the Governor. Beth had a couple cuts on her face but was otherwise unharmed. He kissed her on the head before walking back to the group with her.

Beth looked back as they walked after feeling Dawn’s piercing stare upon them.

“I’m glad we could work things out.” Dawn commented.

“Yeah.” Rick replied gruffly. He had his people and wanted nothing more than to leave.

“Now I just need Noah.” Dawn told them, stopping the group in its tracks. “And then you can leave.”

Rick turned around and marched towards her, his hand resting on the handle of his Colt Python revolver.

“That wasn’t part of the deal.” He retorted with irritation.

“Noah was my ward. Beth took his place and now I’m losing her so I need him back.” Dawn explained coldly.

“Ma’am that’s not…” Shepherd tried to reason with her.

“Shut up!” Dawn hissed. “My officers put their lives on the line to find him. One of them died.”

Daryl growled and stepped forward. “He ain’t staying.”

“He’s one of mine, you have no claim on him.” Dawn countered.

“The boy wants to go home so you have no claim on him.” Rick growled.

“Well then we don’t have a deal.” Dawn challenged.

“The deal is done!” Rick barked angrily.

“It’s okay!” Noah interrupted, trying to stop a fight from breaking out.

“No, no!” Rick argued. It wasn’t okay. It wasn’t fair and it wasn’t part of the deal.

“I gotta do it.” Noah told him, handing him back a gun.

“It’s not okay.” Beth commented as Rick took the gun back.

“It’s settled.” Dawn stated as Noah walked towards her.

“Wait!” Beth called out and rushed up to Noah, embracing him in a tight hug.

“No, it’s okay.” Noah reassured her. If it meant nobody died then his freedom was worth sacrificing.

“I knew you’d be back.” Dawn commented.

Beth opened her eyes and glared at Dawn. The female leader of the Grady Memorial group always made herself out to be a victim. Convinced Beth that she acted the way she did because of all the bad cops within their ranks. Her actions in that corridor told Beth a different story. Dawn was a control freak. She played the sympathy card so that people would feel like they were doing her a favour instead of doing her bidding without any choice. Dawn was trying to be in charge even now. She was one of the bad ones and she was about to steal Noah’s freedom, the very thing Beth had fought hard to attain.

Beth released Noah and slowly walked up to Dawn until they were face to face. She glared into Dawn’s eyes, now seeing what she truly was. The _bitch_ that she was. Beth was tired of being controlled by her. Beth was tired of feeling sorry for her. Beth was tired of never fighting back. Beth was sick of the sight of her.

“I get it now.” She hissed at Dawn.

Suddenly Beth pulled out a pair of large medical scissors from her sleeve and stabbed Dawn in the collar with them. The shock of the attack and the pain from the stab caused Dawn’s muscles to contract, one of them being her trigger finger. The loud bang of the gunshot echoed painfully in the corridor as blood shot out the back of Beth’s head. Her body fell limp and collapsed to the floor.

There was a stunned silence. Dawn had just shot Beth in the head and it wasn’t clear if it had been intentional or an accident. Everyone looked on in horror as Dawn turned to them. Her expression was also one of horror and regret as she tried to explain that it had been an accident. She hadn’t meant to fire the gun and certainly hadn’t meant to kill Beth.

Daryl didn’t care. With tears rolling down his face he stepped forward and pulled out his gun. Before Dawn could say another word he pulled the trigger and shot her in the head in vengeance.

With the second gunshot everyone pulled out their weapons and took aim. The only thing stopping a massacre for both sides was Officer Shepherd who spread out her arms.

“Everyone hold your fire!” She bellowed. “It’s over! It was just about her!”

Rick’s revolver shook in his hand as he kept it aimed. Tears were beginning to sting his eyes. They had come to make a deal, two for two. There would be no need for violence and no one would get hurt. A split second later and Beth lay on the floor in front of him, a pool of blood forming around her head where the bullet had exited after ending her life. Tears were welling up in everyone’s eyes.

“Stand down!” Shepherd barked aggressively at her fellow officers.

Daryl’s hand shook as he continued to aim his gun. The tears continued to fall as he began sobbing. He wanted to shoot all of the cops but no amount of bullets would bring Beth back. Carol’s hands on his shoulder were all it took for him to lower his arm and gaze down at Beth’s lifeless form.

Even Rick who was a pillar of strength for his group couldn’t stop the tears from falling. He had to do something. He had to make some good come of it. Rick couldn’t stand there and accept that he had let Hershel’s youngest daughter, Carl’s surrogate sister, die in front of him for nothing. He turned around to collect himself as best he could before facing the police officers yet again.

“You can stay.” Shepherd offered.

“We’re surviving here.” One of the doctors added. “It’s better than out there.”

 Rick shook his head as the tears fell. He could barely keep his body or his voice steady.

“No!” He refused to stay where he had let Beth die.

He glanced down at her and remembered all the happy moments she had given them. All those positive memories. He remembered her father and the lessons he had taught them all. Then he remembered Bob’s dying words.

_“Nightmares end but they don’t have to end who you are.”_

“I’m taking in anyone back there who wants to leave.” Rick told them, barely keeping his voice from shaking. “If you want to come with us, just step forward now.”

Only Noah stepped forward towards the group.

 

The abandoned, burned and scarred skyscrapers flew past the window of the fire truck as they drove through the streets of Atlanta towards Grady Memorial Hospital. Jason and Carl sat together next to the still unconscious Eugene. Jason squeezed Carl’s hand reassuringly. He was finally going to get to meet his surrogate sister, Beth, again. Carl was going to get to introduce Jason to her just as he had wanted to and proudly tell her that he had found love. The approval of his surrogate sister meant the world to Carl and Jason knew it. Before they could move on, Jason felt he still had some things that needed to be said.

“Carl. I want you to know something.” He began. Carl looked at him, as did Michonne, Gabriel, Tara and Rosita who rode in the back with them.

“Okay.” Carl answered and waited for what Jason had to say.

“I told you before that since Kellin died I had been searching for a good death. As you know I never found one, even at times when I expected to die.” Jason explained, rubbing the top of Carl’s hand with his thumb. “Now I know why. It wasn’t death I was supposed to be searching for. It was you. I was supposed to meet you.”

Carl smiled as he felt a lump form in his throat. Jason had just admitted to him that he was Jason’s reason to live. It meant he had the highest importance compared to anyone or anything in Jason’s life. It was the most heart-warming thing anyone had ever said to him. Jason simply smiled back and squeezed Carl’s hand again.

Michonne and the others couldn’t help but smile at their heart-felt exchange. Though the whole thing made Gabriel uncomfortable due to his religious beliefs and convictions he knew better than to say anything. Jason didn’t like him much and he didn’t want to give the young man an excuse to hurt him.  

“We’re here!” Abraham called from the front of the truck.

The fire truck pulled up at the hospital’s parking lot. The doors opened as they all began to step out. The parking lot was vacant except for some dead bodies, a few tents and parked cars. Jason turned to Carl as he got out.

“Perhaps you should stay with Judith and Eugene.” He suggested.

Carl shook his head and stepped out. “I came here for Beth.”

Jason nodded. “Gabriel, can you stay in the truck with them?”

Gabriel nodded weakly. Though he was very uncomfortable being with the group he couldn’t complain about being asked to stay in the safety of the fire truck.

Jason and Carl followed the others with their guns raised. There were walkers in the parking lot and they had no way of knowing if things had turned violent between the two groups. They had to be prepared for a gunfight.

Glenn stabbed one of the walkers that occupied the parking lot in the head while Michonne decapitated another one. There weren’t many walkers and it was wise of them to stick to silent weapons when in the city. They didn’t need a herd descending upon them. Once they made it past the main gates and approached the front door they spotted a figure emerge.

Rick walked out with his hands by his sides and with puffed up red eyes. His expression said it all. He was upset. Sasha followed behind him, marching out with her sniper rifle with a blank expression as if she was holding back her emotions. Behind her was Tyreese who walked hand in hand slowly with Carol who was still finding it difficult to walk after being hit by a car. Carol still had tears rolling down her face.

Maggie dropped her gun to the floor as her worst nightmare became reality. From behind Tyreese and Carol, Daryl emerged carrying Beth’s lifeless body. Blood was still dripping from her hair. Jason froze where he was, obscuring Carl’s view of the group. He didn’t know Beth but at that moment he recognised her. He knew that it was her who was being carried in Daryl’s arms.

“Beth!” Maggie screamed as she dropped to the floor sobbing.

After all the time spent since the prison was endured. All of the chaos, all of the danger and misplaced hope. Then to be told that Beth was alive and well only to be greeted by her dead body. Maggie fell apart right there where she landed, unable to move as she sobbed uncontrollably.

A soft thud sounded to Jason’s left, awakening him from his shock. Carl had dropped his gun and had dropped to his knees. His shoulders shook as he sobbed. Beth had been an older sister to him, always so fun, sweet and caring. She had never had a problem with taking time out of her day or chores to talk and spend time with him. Having learned that she was alive he had wanted nothing more than to see her again and for her to meet Jason. Now she lay in Daryl’s arms. Lifeless.

Jason crouched down and wrapped his arms around Carl who instinctively cuddled into the older teen’s chest. Jason’s jacket was undone and he could feel the warm droplets soaking through his black shirt that were Carl’s tears. Rick walked up to them and placed a hand on Carl’s back, rubbing it softly as tears fell from his own eyes.

Beth had been a beacon of hope for them. She had always been pure. She had refused to let the world change her into a monster like so many of the others had become. She was their light in the dark and that light had just gone out.

 

**Well that was a brutal chapter, wasn’t it? It was also the longest I’ve ever written. I’ve got a lot to say for this chapter so bear with me.**

**First off, thank you everyone for being so patient with me. This chapter was huge and therefore took a lot of time to write, especially when it came to deciding what scenes to include.**

**Second, the poem, “He Is Not Dead” was written by James Whitecomb Riley. The song that Jason sings to Carl is “Hiding Place” by Miranda Frigon.**

**Third, as I’m uploading this on the 7 th of February, I wish to dedicate it to a friend who died on this date 2 years ago. May you rest well, Juan. **

**Fourth, I had originally planned for there to be the 1 intimate moment between Jason and Carl, but due to the 2 week delay for this chapter I gifted you all with 2 intimate scenes.**

**Fifth, I’m going to list all the Easter Eggs that have appeared in the story so far, as I have a habit of that in my writing.**

**Chapter 1 – Jason’s clothes and gun are modelled after Leon S Kennedy from Resident Evil. The gun is from the RE film: Damnation.**

**Chapter 2 – Jason meeting Kellin is based off an experience in my own life. The club in question is based off the Cathouse in Glasgow.**

**Chapter 3 – The suicide note is a reference to 28 Days Later.**

**Chapter 4 – The teapot is an inside joke. Kellin’s appearance is based off my boyfriend.**

**Chapter 5 – Jason refers to Rick losing his hand. Rick loses his hand in the comics.**

**Chapter 6 – The hospital is the same one Rick woke up in.**

**Chapter 7 – No Easter Eggs.**

**Chapter 8 – The last line is taken from the uncut Blu-ray edit, which matches the comics.**

**Chapter 9 – Jason’s violent outburst references an incident in my own life.**

**Chapter 10 – The game Jason and Kellin are playing is Super Smash Bros Brawl, a game I played hundreds of hours of with friends.**

**Chapter 11 – No Easter Eggs.**

**Chapter 12 – Bill and his group are based off the group from Left 4 Dead.**

**Sixth, thanks for all the favourites/follows/votes/kudos/bookmarks/ etc.  
Also thanks to my reviewers for chapter 12: rk0192, MagnificentFern, SundayAL, jar98, zakhaev1, RainbowO, Chancey, SaraP and that one guest. **

**The final thing is a request to any artistically gifted readers. If anyone wishes to sketch or create character art for Jason, I would be amazed to see what you can come up with. I’ll be sure to link and credit everyone in the next chapters if I receive any. ^^**

**Anyway, hope you have all enjoyed this very long chapter. Please review/comment and let me know what you think. I’m looking forward to the return of Season 5 tomorrow so let’s see what alterations I can make by including Jason. :P**

 


	14. Despair

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group revisit a familiar place in order to give Beth a proper funeral.

The late afternoon sun reflected off the windows of Atlanta’s abandoned skyscrapers. A couple years previous they had been home to offices and apartments. People would live their working and private lives behind the glass of those windows as they went about their day to day routines. The buildings were empty shells. Artefacts belonging to a civilization that had long since disappeared. On street level, the roads that were once filled with busy traffic and the streets that were once filled with bustling crowds were now silent. The only crowds that wandered the streets were the undead.

In the parking lot of Grady Memorial Hospital, a rare crowd of living people had gathered together. The only sound that filled the air around them was painful sobbing. Daryl stood in front of them with Beth’s lifeless form in his arms. Blood trickled out of her hair and splashed softly on the ground while Daryl’s tears splashed softly on her clothes. Maggie had collapsed to the floor sobbing with Glenn holding onto her in an attempt to comfort her. Carl was cuddled into Jason’s chest, his tears soaking the top of Jason’s shirt. Rick rubbed his son’s back as his own tears stung at his eyes. Michonne stood over them and though she didn’t cry all her warrior strength was gone from her face. Carol leaned against Tyreese as she struggled to stand with her injuries and the weakness of her legs that increased with each tear.

Those who didn’t know Beth, such as Abraham and his group didn’t cry but maintained a respectful silence. They understood how important Beth had been to the group and how devastating her death was. They understood because each one of them had lost someone close to them before. The sun was starting to set in the sky as if it was being pushed down by the heavy emotions that consumed the air.

“I don’t mean to be insensitive but it’s gonna be dark soon.” Abraham finally spoke up to break the silence. “So we need to move.”

“We need time to mourn.” Glenn retorted, looking up from hugging Maggie.

“I respect that but not in a city filled with the dead.” Abraham countered.

“I know a place.” Rick told them gruffly as he stood up.

The others looked at him. None of them could think of where that place could be as they were homeless after the church had been overrun with walkers. Rick, despite the redness of his eyes, became a pillar of strength again and displayed his usual leader’s confidence. Nothing more needed to be said. The group would be split between the fire truck and the van and Rick would lead them to the place he knew.

Jason gave Carl another tight hug before standing up, gently pulling the boy up onto his feet. Once he was on his feet his sobbing lessened but his gaze remained downward. Jason kept his arm wrapped round his younger lover as they headed for the fire truck. Abraham, Rosita, Tara, Michonne, Gabriel, Jason, Carl and the unconscious Eugene along with Judith got in the fire truck while Rick, Daryl, Maggie, Glenn, Tyreese, Carol and Noah got in the van with Beth’s body.

Both engines roared to life with the van driven by Rick leading the way. In the back of the van Daryl continued to hold onto Beth’s body while Maggie sobbed against it. Her younger sister, the last living member of her family lay lifeless in front of her. If not for Glenn she would be alone in the world. Noah too was sobbing. He had attempted to sacrifice his freedom so that no one would get hurt but it had ended with Beth being killed. Though he would never mention it to anyone, he had grown to like Beth and had wanted to take things further. He would never have that chance.

In the fire truck, Carl remained curled into Jason’s side with his face resting against Jason’s shoulder. Jason kept his arm wrapped around Carl with a couple fingers stroking his arm and side. He looked out the window as the dilapidated buildings and rotting corpses shot past. It didn’t take long for the buildings to stop passing by the window as they hit one of the highways that led into Atlanta. On the other side of the highway a constant river of abandoned cars filled the road, telling the tragic story of those who had tried to escape the city in the early days of the apocalypse.

As their journey continued the scenery didn’t change much. They had remained on the highway and were travelling south. Jason wasn’t sure what road they were taking but he remembered the number 85 written on the dirty road. It all looked the same to him. Trees, dirty tarmac, abandoned cars, corpses, walkers, dogs, foxes and raccoons. The outside world had morphed into a blur. Eugene wasn’t a scientist and didn’t know a cure. Beth was dead. All hope seemed to be fading and he wasn’t sure if he could make the pain any easier for the boy curled into his side. Jason glanced down at Carl but couldn’t see his face because of his hat. He didn’t like how silent Carl had become.

The sun continued to set in the sky. The bright blue and yellow mix in the sky was morphing into a dark orange as the sunlight continued to fade. They had to make it somewhere safe before nightfall. Jason trusted Rick’s judgement but that did nothing to lessen the anxiety that was bubbling inside him. They were low on fuel and were running low on supplies. They would soon be forced to rely on luck unless they organised themselves quickly. Jason sighed and continued to gaze out the window as the apocalyptic world rushed past.

Just over half an hour later they turned off from the highway and rocked along a dirt road. Looking out the window all Jason could see were trees and countryside but fortunately no walkers or signs of life. He yawned and sat up more, not removing his arm from Carl. He hoped they were close. Sure enough, a few moments later the fire truck ground to a halt as Abraham killed the engine. They opened the doors and stepped outside.

An expanse of farmland and woodland stretched out before them. Down the hill to their left was a large pile of wood that had been burned so badly it was almost coal. The volume of burnt wood suggested it had been a structure or building before the fire had done its damage. Next to the black pile was the burned out shell of a motorhome. It had obviously been caught in the same fire.

Thicker patches in the grassy fields indicated the existence of dead bodies. The bodies that were within view were nothing but clothed skeletons, a sign that they had been laying there for months. Ahead of the fire truck and van was a large wooden farm house. Its design suggested that it was around two hundred years old. The exterior was damaged and the windows had been smashed. The house had been ransacked by other survivors and the blood stains on the walls meant that walkers had also attacked.

Maggie was still sobbing and had begun to cry harder at being on the farm. She, along with Daryl, Glenn, Carol, Carl and Rick knew where they were. The farm had belonged to Maggie’s family and was where Rick had first met Hershel after Otis accidentally shot Carl. The farm was a shadow of its former self after a large walker herd had passed through and destroyed it. Rick stood at the front of the group and stared at the house. It wasn’t the most secure place to spend the night but it was safe enough and it felt right.

“This place doesn’t look very safe.” Sasha commented, looking around.

“We spend the night here.” Rick told them gruffly, his eyes on Beth’s lifeless form.

“We’re exposed out here.” Sasha argued.

Tyreese placed a hand on his sister’s shoulder. “We’ll be exposed no matter where we go.”

Rick narrowed his eyes as he took in the faces of his group, all of them stricken with grief and disappointment. He had to keep hope alive like he had done so many times before. He had to justify his decision to return to the farm.

“We have decent sight-lines.” Rick explained. “Besides, this is where Beth should be buried.”

From his position of holding and comforting Maggie, Glenn’s eyes met with Rick’s own as the Asian man nodded. It made sense to bury Beth with her family and some of their old friends. It would also give them the opportunity to mourn Hershel’s death, which they hadn’t had time for since the prison attack.

“Sasha, Tyreese and Michonne, keep watch.” Rick instructed, trying to keep the group occupied. “Abraham, Rosita, with me. We need to clear the house.”

Abraham and Rosita nodded and pulled out their knives as they followed Rick into the farm house. They walked up the wooden steps of the porch and walked through the front door which had been broken off the top hinges and left hanging open. Shards of glass littered the floor, darkened by the dried blood stains. Most of the lamps had been smashed or taken and several wooden tables and chairs had been broken with the legs snapped off.

The three of them split up. Rick headed for the front room, Rosita headed for the kitchen and Abraham headed upstairs. Rick kept his machete at the ready as he wandered through the living room, prepared for people or walkers. The room was empty however, occupied only by the blood stained, dusty sofas and empty cans. In the kitchen, Rosita encountered a lone walker that had been in there for weeks. It slowly turned and snarled at the Hispanic woman before it received a sharp blade to the eye. Its body dropped to the floor, leaving Rosita alone in the dirty kitchen.

In the upstairs hallway, all the bedroom doors were open except for one. Abraham kept his knife held at chest height as he approached the door. In one quick movement he turned the handle and barged open the door to one of the bedrooms. The smell of death filled his nostrils as the living corpse practically pounced on him, its hands grabbed his shoulders as its face came forward in an attempt to bite the soldier. Abraham stood his ground and held the walker back with one arm while his other arm swung forward and thrust the knife into the walker’s fragile, rotting cranium.

“Clear!” Abraham bellowed down to Rick and Rosita.

“Clear!” Rosita called from downstairs.

“Clear!” Rick answered them with a shout of his own. “Take the bodies outside!”

Rick walked through to the kitchen and helped Rosita drag the walker’s body out of the house. As they made it round the side of the large farm house, a second body dropped down next to them, the bones crunching from the impact. Rick and Rosita looked up and spotted Abraham with his head sticking out the bedroom window staring down at them.

“Abraham!” Rosita shouted, irritated at his callous approach.

Abraham simply smirked back before disappearing from view. It may not have been the safest, most respectable way to remove the body from the house, but it was certainly the fastest.

Once the bodies had been moved away, the group slowly but surely made their way into the house. It wasn’t the most secure place they had ever stayed but it would last them for a night. The sun was getting steadily lower in the sky. Carol rested on the sofa in the living room as she was still struggling to stand from being hit by the police car. As the group arranged their belongings and supplies about the large farm house, Maggie broke from her grief induced silence.

“The basement!” She announced, earning confused looks from Glenn and the others. “There are supplies in the basement.”

She remembered their last night on the farm. Rick, Shane, Daryl and Glenn had headed out to look for Randall while the rest of the group prepared to move into the house for the winter. They had stocked up the basement in case of emergencies and Hershel had just finished doing that when the herd descended upon the farm.

“My dad stocked the basement with supplies.” Maggie told them. “Food, water, batteries.”

The faces of the group brightened up. Even in death, Hershel still seemed to be helping them. They were low on supplies so the hidden food and water in the basement would be a big help to them all.

“Where’s the basement?” Glenn asked her, glad to have her mind on something other than Beth for a little while.

Maggie got up from where she sat and led Glenn and Rick to one of the other rooms. Parallel with one of the walls was an obvious door in the floor. However, the broken grandfather clock lay on top of it, blocking access to it. She struggled to lift it on her own but quickly up righted the clock with the help of Glenn and Rick. Maggie bent down and pulled the handle up, lifting the door open to reveal a steep flight of stairs.

Before Glenn or Rick could stop her she shot down the stairs. She had to make sure that nobody had discovered the basement and its supplies. They couldn’t afford for there to be nothing left. Glenn and Rick waited at the top of the staircase with Glenn calling down to Maggie. Eventually she returned to the room with a face of mixed emotion.

“Some of the supplies are gone.” Maggie told them with an exasperated sigh. “Someone took some of them.”

Rick thought for a moment, looking around at the house. “Why only some? It’s obvious no one is living here.”

“I know why.” Jason announced, limping into the room with them.

Rick glanced round at him. His narrowed eye stare gave the command for Jason to explain what he knew.

“Kellin and I found this place about a year ago.” Jason explained. “I found the basement and took what we needed.”

Maggie glared at him. She was still protective of her house. “Why didn’t you just take all of it?”

“It was too much to carry.” Jason answered. “So I knocked over the clock so no one would find the door.”

“So only you would know where the supplies were.” Glenn commented, understanding what the plan had been.

Jason nodded. “In the end we never came back here. Just as well then.”

Rick accepted the explanation, as did Glenn and Maggie. As eager as they were to organise the supplies they had more important things to do first. At the top of the list was Beth’s funeral.

“We’ll organise the supplies after we bury Beth.” Rick told them lowly.

A heavy silence filled the air at those words. No one was truly ready to accept that the innocent light of the group, Beth, was gone. The cruel reality of the world they lived in never relented on its dark reminders. As they stepped outside, Rick instantly spotted Tyreese in the distance by some trees. The large man had a shovel in his hands and he was digging a grave next to a small collection of graves. Rick recognised the graves as those of Dale, Sophia and Hershel’s family. It made sense to bury Beth there with them.

Rick looked round at the group. Carol was badly injured. Maggie and Daryl were in a deep state of grief. Carl was also extremely upset and only seemed to respond to Jason’s quiet words. They had the newcomer, Noah, to deal with along with Abraham’s group. It was going to be a long night.

 

The group stood round the grave. They all either had their hands to their sides or clasped in front of them. No one knew what to say despite wanting desperately to voice their feelings. They spent their time in silence, some crying, others contemplating the past, present and future.

Maggie couldn’t help but feel like she had failed her father. She hadn’t been able to keep her little sister safe. What hurt the most was having heard that she was still alive only to be so brutally disappointed. It would have been easier before Terminus when she believed that Beth was dead.

_“Maggie, we don’t get to be upset. We all got jobs to do, that’s what daddy always says. Just focus on what you have to do. No matter what happens, we’ll deal with it. We have to.”_

Carol had known Beth since they arrived on the farm. She had seen the farmer’s daughter transform from an innocent, fragile and terrified teenager into a hardened beacon of hope. She had gone from being suicidal to being able to cope with anything that the world threw at her. It had been incredibly important to find her and Carol didn’t regret getting hit by the police car because it had allowed her to spend some time with Beth before she died.

_“I don’t know if you can hear me but I just wanted you to know that I’m here.”_

Daryl had been the last person to spend any significant time with Beth. They had escaped the prison together and had managed to survive together. It was in that time he saw that she wasn’t the fragile little girl he always thought she was. She had been one of the strongest members of the group and hadn’t been afraid to voice her opinion. Daryl knew he would always feel guilty for allowing her to be kidnapped by the Grady officers. If that hadn’t happened they might have come across Rick, Carl, Michonne and Jason then the six of them could have went to Terminus together. He had done everything he could to try and save her but in the end it hadn’t been enough.

_“I know you look at me and you just see another dead girl! I’m not Michonne, I’m not Carol, I’m not Maggie! I survived and you don’t get it because I’m not like you or them but I made it!”_

Noah didn’t feel right standing at Beth’s grave with her friends. He was the newcomer, he should have been the one to die. He should have been allowed to stay with Dawn. Beth deserved to be with her friends again but instead she was in the ground. It wasn’t right.

_The gunshots echoed around him as he ran past the group of walkers. They were all more focused on Beth as she shot at them until her gun ran empty. Noah rushed for the gate and squeezed himself through the gap. He looked back in time to see the Grady Memorial officers tackle Beth to the ground and handcuff her. He stared at her as she smiled proudly back. She hadn’t escaped but she had made sure he was free from them. It was a noble sacrifice._

Carl still couldn’t believe that Beth was truly gone. He had looked forward to seeing her again and had been desperate to introduce her to Jason. Now that would never happen. He hoped that what she had told him after his mother’s death was true and that it was especially true for her.

_“I think my mum and your mum, and everyone that we loved is in heaven. And I hope that they are watching over us. And that they are at peace.”_

As the silence continued, Jason got down on one knee as quietly as he could and took his backpack off so he could retrieve something from inside it. The small book he pulled out was the very same book of poems he had found when Kellin died. He stood back up and cleared his throat to get the attention of the group.

“Since no one knows what to say and Gabriel has refused to speak out of respect.” Jason commented nervously. He didn’t want to cause more pain. “Perhaps a short poem from this book would be enough?”

Jason’s eyes remained fixated on Rick and Maggie. He could detect a feeling of resentment in Maggie’s eyes. Jason never knew Beth yet he was offering to speak at her funeral. It wasn’t his place. The reason no one who did know her spoke was because they were too upset to do so. Rick remained silent as he knew it was Maggie who had the final say.

“Read one out.” Carl’s voice announced from beside Jason.

Jason and the others turned to look at the teen who held his baby sister in his arms. Tears were still stinging his eyes from having seen Beth’s body lowered into the ground and buried but it was the silence that was really killing him. For all the respect and love that occupied the silence, there was also an awkwardness because no one could think of anything to say.

“Please.” Carl continued.

Jason looked back at Maggie, reminding himself that it was still up to her. She glared at him through her tears before nodding her head slowly. It was brief but it was all the permission he needed. Jason stepped forward and opened the small book, flicking through the pages before settling on a poem. He cleared his throat and read it out.

“The sun shall rise,  
and sure to set.  
Her time has come,  
have no regret.  
Her life she lived,  
we sure all know.  
A better place,  
she has to go.   
Rejoice today,  
it’s at an end.  
And she will see us,  
once again.”

The poem and the sentiments expressed within it were enough to bring Maggie to tears again. This included Carl, Noah and Carol. Daryl stood with his face as expressionless as possible but the reality was clear to those who knew him. He was doing his best to hold back the tears. Tears also rolled down the cheeks of Rick, Michonne, Tyreese and Sasha. Jason stepped back as Glenn stood forward, wiping tears from his own eyes as he placed a single candle on top of the grave. He lit it before stepping back to comfort Maggie once again. Beth was with her family once again.

 

After a few moments the group slowly began to disperse. There was still work to be done at the farm house so they could set up a camp to spend the night in safely. The sun had disappeared beyond the horizon, leaving the farm in almost total darkness if not for the moonlight that gently illuminated the area. As they dispersed Jason noticed Rick wandering off into one of the fields. It wasn’t like the bearded leader to wander off in such a way so Jason decided to follow quietly behind him.

Rick made his way through the thick grass of the field, keeping an eye out for any walkers in the distance or even any hidden in the grass itself. He was fortunate that the area was very clear just as it had been when they had stayed there before. He made his way past the burned remains of the barn and up one of the larger hills. Rick stopped at the top. He had found what he was looking for. At his feet was a clothed skeleton. The clothes were dirty and had been bleached by the sun but they were still identifiable. Black combat boots, beige cargos and a dark blue jacket. Rick stood and gazed down at Shane’s final resting spot.

“Who is it?” Jason asked from behind the man.

Rick flinched slightly at the sound of Jason’s voice. He had been unaware that the younger man had followed him from the funeral to Shane’s corpse. He held out his arm to reveal the shovel in his left hand.

“Shane.” Rick answered lowly.

“What happened?” Jason asked. He remembered that Carl had explained it before but he wanted to hear it all from Rick.

“He was my best friend. Knew each other since high school. He was my brother.” Rick explained, looking down at the corpse. “He thought I was dead when everything happened and kept my family safe. When I came back, he thought I was stealing Lori and Carl from him.”

Jason stepped forward so that he stood beside Rick. He remained silent and allowed Rick to explain everything at his own pace with as much or as little detail as he liked.

“The last night on the farm, he led me out here to put a bullet in my back.” Rick explained. “He had changed and I just wanted him dead. I was sick of fighting him.”

“You never got a chance to bury him?” Jason asked carefully after a few moments.

“A herd came after Carl put him down.” Rick answered. “It ran us off the farm.”

Jason nodded and placed his hand on the handle of the shovel next to Rick’s. Their skin touched lightly, causing the bearded man to turn his head to study the younger man who continued to look at Shane’s skeleton.

“Well, I owe my life to him. The two of you knew my father, he was a cop too.” Jason explained. “Shane taught me how to use a gun. If not for that training, I’d be dead now.”

“What was your father’s name?” Rick asked, curious that they had a connection before the apocalypse.

“Officer Clarke.” Jason answered, revealing his surname. “William.”

“I remember him.” Rick replied with a small smile. “He was a good man.”

Jason smiled, though the comment was also an emotional stab to the heart. He missed his father and often wished he was still around. He took the shovel from Rick and started digging into the ground next to Shane’s bones.

“Shane may have done some horrible things.” Jason commented. “But he was my gun instructor and your best friend. I think we should remember him that way.”

Rick nodded in agreement. “I can dig the grave.”

Jason shook his head as he kept digging. “We can take turns.”

“How’s Carl?” Rick asked out of the blue.

Jason thought for a moment as he continued to shovel earth into a pile. “He’s upset but he’ll manage. He’s a tough one.”

“Thank you for being there for him.” Rick told him. “You can comfort him in ways I can’t.”

“And you can comfort him in ways that I can’t.” Jason answered, handing him the shovel. “He still needs his father.”

“We need to find a place. Somewhere safe.” Rick commented as he dug the grave. “Somewhere secure that we can call home. It has to be out there somewhere.”

Jason started placing Shane’s remains in the grave. The bones were loose so he didn’t worry too much about maintaining the shape as that would be too much work.

“We’ll either find a place or we’ll make one.” Jason commented as he placed the bones into the ground. “Somewhere Judith can grow up.”

Rick nodded at this. He doubted such a place existed but they couldn’t give up hope. They had found the prison and it had been a safe haven for many months so other such places had to exist.

“You know, I kinda wish I had come to the prison gates a lot sooner.” Jason commented with a sigh as he and Rick placed the last of Shane’s bones in the ground. “Things could have been different.”

“You were at the prison?” Rick asked, slightly confused. He never remembered seeing Jason.

“I found the prison a week before we met. I stayed away because I didn’t want to be near people.” Jason explained, regret rushing through him. “Eventually I decided I needed to give people a chance. That was the day it was destroyed.”

Rick nodded as Jason took the shovel and began filling in Shane’s grave. “You were right to be cautious. But I don’t think anything would have changed.”

“Maybe it would have.” Jason retorted as the grave was filled in. “Maybe I would have died instead of Hershel. Maybe everyone would have lived.”

Rick shook his head and stuck the shovel into the ground in a manner that was almost violent. “What happened at the prison happened. We need to focus on the here and now. You’re important to Carl and to the group. That’s all that matters.”

“I’m still sorry for not being there.” Jason answered after a few moments.

“You’re here now. That’s all that matters.” Rick told him firmly.

Jason nodded. He still felt unsure about the past and honestly believed he could have made a difference. However, he also knew that the past could not be changed so it was often best not to dwell on it. He looked up when Rick placed a hand on his shoulder.

“Let’s get back to the others.” Rick said, leading them back to camp. “We still have things to do.”

 

In front of the farm house, they had parked the fire truck and van at angles that formed a triangle with the front of the house. This allowed them to have chairs and a fire burning in the centre without attracting the attention of nearby walkers or people. Sasha was on top of the fire truck with her rifle as it had a night vision scope attachment. The surrounding area was quiet with no signs of walkers or people in the visible distance which allowed the group to relax for a few hours.

Abraham kept his assault rifle in his hands as he leaned against the front of the van. He refused to allow himself to relax and made sure to keep watch for the group. A few feet away from him, Eugene and Rosita were talking about their past lives. With the truth having been revealed about Eugene, the man with the mullet was more open about his past and who he really was. Even though he had lied to Abraham and used him, the soldier couldn’t stop caring so it was important they made an effort to bond and understand each other.

Glenn and Maggie were cuddled into each other by the fire. Glenn was trying his best to comfort Maggie and support her. Tara, who was sitting with them, was making a similar effort by talking about her own sister, Lilly, who fell in love with the Governor and died at the prison.

Tyreese sat with Carol while he took care of Judith. He had offered to look after the baby so as to give Carl a break from looking after his sister. The large man knew that Carl needed time to grieve and that would be easier without having to worry about a baby constantly. He felt guilty. His plan should have worked and Beth should have been with them but it hadn’t worked out that way. Rick’s original plan had been extremely risky and dangerous but may have worked out better than the trade. Ultimately, there was no way of knowing who was right so Tyreese had to settle with having done what he felt was the right thing.

Father Gabriel sat alone. He had found a bible in the farm house and had it open in front of him so he could read through various passages. He didn’t feel comfortable being part of a group of killers and was deeply intimidated by Rick and Jason, both of whom had expressed that they would kill him if given a reason. Gabriel chose to retreat into his shell and take comfort in the Lord’s words, allowing his mind to distance itself from the people around him.

Michonne walked past them all to the other side of the camp fire. She had a can of food in her hand which she had just retrieved from their supply box. The samurai sat down next to Carl who had been sitting alone and gave a small smile to him even though the boy wasn’t looking at her.

“Where’s Jason?” Michonne asked him. “I thought you two were glued together.”

Her attempt at humour wasn’t lost on him but Carl couldn’t respond to it. “He went for a walk with my dad.”

Michonne placed the can of food down at her feet and reached out to rub Carl’s back. “You okay?”

Carl shook his head and wiped a lone tear from his eye with his finger. “I miss her.”

Michonne rubbed his back a little more before pulling him into a one sided hug. “We all do.”

They remained in the embrace for a few silent moments. Michonne knew that nothing she said would make the pain go away. It was all a question of time and how strong Carl was. She was interrupted from her thoughts by a growl from Carl’s stomach.

“You haven’t eaten, have you?” She asked him with a motherly tone.

“I’m not hungry.” Carl murmured back dishonestly.

Michonne lifted the can from the floor and handed it to him. “Eat something.”

“Michonne, its fine. I don’t need to eat.” Carl tried to defend himself weakly.

“Eat.” Michonne repeated, her inner mother coming out in force.

Carl reluctantly took the can and opened it. He stared at the contents for a while before finally starting to eat them.

Noah sat apart from the rest of the group. He felt like an outsider and until time had passed he would remain that way. He was the newcomer to the group when in reality it should be Beth in his place. As he sat at the back of the van as the doors were both open, Rick returned from the field and sat next to him. Noah met his gaze as he folded his arms to protect his body from the cold.

“Beth helped you escape, right?” Rick asked, staring at Noah to study his reactions.

Noah nodded solemnly. He didn’t feel like talking.

“What was the plan?” Rick asked. He hoped there had been a plan, at least.

“I wanted to go back home.” Noah finally answered. “We have a community there.”

“Is it secure?” Rick questioned. He didn’t want to get his hopes up too soon.

“Yeah. It’s a gated community with a wall around the perimeter.” Noah explained with a nod. “Plenty of people too.”

“How many people?” Rick asked. This was crucial should anything go wrong if they went there.

Noah thought for a moment. “Last time I was there it was about twenty people.”

Rick nodded and remained silent. A walled off, gated community of twenty people could be a safe destination for them. It could also be extremely dangerous depending on how the treat outsiders and if Noah would be recognised.

“She was gonna come with me.” Noah spoke up.

“How far?” Rick asked, glancing over at the group.

“Richmond, Virginia.” Noah answered.

Rick tilted his head in thought. It was far away but it gave them a destination. If the community was still standing then it could be a new home for them. They would have to try to get there. It would be a long, dangerous journey but it held the potential of the reward of safety. The group was strong. They could do it. Judith’s cries brought him out of his pondering. The baby needed her father.

As Rick made his way over to the crying Judith so he could take care of her, Jason made his way over to Carl. Upon Jason’s arrival, Michonne got up and headed over to Rick to discuss what the plan was. Jason sat down next to Carl and instinctively wrapped his arm around him. Carl responded by leaning into him.

“You okay?” Jason asked gently.

“Yeah… well, not really.” Carl answered, deciding to be honest with the older teen.

“What’s wrong?” Jason asked before quickly correcting himself. “Apart from the obvious, I mean.”

Carl thought for a moment and lifted his head from Jason’s shoulder. He looked up at Jason’s face and stared into his lover’s concerned eyes. He could trust Jason. He knew that.

“Maybe if I had been there, I could have done something.” Carl told him. “Maybe then she’d still be here.”

Jason pulled Carl close to him and kissed his forehead. He stared into his eyes strongly, as if trying to see straight into Carl’s soul so that his words could be buried in Carl’s spirit.

“Nothing you could have done would have changed the outcome. You can’t torture yourself like this.” Jason told him, holding his shoulders firmly. “You’re not to blame, nor are you responsible. Sometimes shit just happens and you’re powerless to control it.”

“But this keeps happening. I could have saved Dale. I could have saved Hershel.” Carl pushed. “But I didn’t. This time I wanted to save Beth and now she’s gone!”

“Carl. Stop. The weight of the world isn’t on your shoulders. Nobody blames you.” Jason argued. “So stop blaming yourself. I’ve lost people too. I couldn’t even save my own boyfriend.”

“But how do you just move on from that?” Carl asked. “What stops you blaming yourself?”

Jason sighed. He had blamed himself for weeks, months even. Then he had come to a realisation.

“You learn to accept this world. You learn to accept that no matter how hard you fight, how hard you try to save yourself and others, you won’t always win.” Jason told him. “You learn to accept that you can’t save everyone. You don’t stop trying though. If you try then that’s enough.”

“But what if it’s not enough?” Carl asked stubbornly.

“Then you think of all the times it was enough.” Jason replied. “Your baby sister over there is proof that you can save people.”

Carl looked over at his baby sister who was being fed by Rick. Judith was giggling and Rick was grinning as he played with his daughter. Jason was right. The chaos of the world meant that people were always going to die and sometimes nothing could be done to stop it. The fact that he never gave up nor did the rest of the group was the reason so many of them were still alive. Their time together was what counted most because no one was promised to survive another day. Accepting Jason’s words, he rested his head on Jason’s chest and cuddled into him. He was tired. They all were.

 

Two hours later most of the group had gone into the house to sleep. They knew they couldn’t stay at the dilapidated farm for too long and they were all exhausted from the day that had just passed. While Sasha slept in the house, Maggie had opted to stay on top of the fire truck and keep watch for a while. Glenn had originally argued against this but it was something to keep her mind off Beth’s death.

By the dying fire, Daryl sat alone as he watched the small flames dance around. His eyes may have been focused on the fire but his mind was on Beth. At the prison he had always seen her as the weak, innocent girl that everyone needed to protect. When she became cold to the deaths of people and stopped crying he assumed a part of her had snapped. His time with her on the road had taught him that these assumptions hadn’t been true. Daryl regretted the nasty remarks he had made to her, especially considering they had since come true. Beth never did get to see Maggie again. Beth had believed good people still existed. Beth was one of those good people and like so many others she had died. Another victim of the dark world they inhabited. Her voice echoed in his mind from one of the few pleasant memories.

_“You’re gonna miss me so bad when I’m gone, Daryl Dixon.”_

Beth had been right. Daryl did miss her. At least she knew.

Noticing movement in the dark distance, Maggie looked down the night vision scope of Sasha’s rifle. The movement came from where the graves of her family and friends were. Someone was digging. This deeply confused her because no one else had died so no new graves needed to be dug. The thought that it could be some kind of bizarre grave robber entered her mind so she took aim. Maggie hesitated. She recognised the jacket the person wore. Eventually she realised that it was Jason she was aiming at. She scanned their surroundings and couldn’t spot any threats so she climbed down off the fire truck and headed towards Jason.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Maggie snapped at him as she finally reached him.

Jason looked up from digging a third new grave and didn’t seem to react to her tone. He gestured to the three new graves as he explained.

“For the other people you lost but couldn’t bury.” Jason answered. “Jimmy, Patricia and your father, Hershel.”

Maggie flinched at the names, especially that of her father. She wasn’t sure how to react considering she barely knew Jason yet here he was digging empty graves for her family.

“How do you know about them?” Maggie asked with narrow eyes.

“Rick told me.” Jason explained. “I couldn’t sleep and figured I’d show some respect.”

“You didn’t know them.” Maggie retorted. “So why dig the graves?”

“I wish I had known them. Your father especially.” Jason responded. “I’ve been told so many good things about him.”

“You didn’t answer me.” Maggie pointed out.

“We’ve both lost people.” Jason answered with a sigh. “Since we’re here, I thought you’d like to take the time to give them a proper service.”

Maggie watched as the young man filled in the shallow graves so that they matched the appearance of the others. As she watched him she realised that she had been harsh on someone who was trying to help. As far as she knew he had no skeletons in the closet, he was a good guy and hadn’t put anyone in danger like Father Gabriel had. The consideration that was being shown by Jason was rather rare.

“You should head back and get some sleep.” Maggie told him. “We can have the service in the morning.”

Jason patted down the last grave and nodded. He took the shovel with him as he walked past Maggie who remained where she stood. Although he had gone out his way to do this favour for her and the others, he was surprised that she hadn’t thanked him or appreciated the effort. All he had received was a sharp interrogation.

“Jason.” Maggie called after him.

Jason stopped and turned back to look at her.

“Thank you.” She finished with a small and sad smile.

Jason smiled softly and nodded before heading back up to the farm house.

 

_The floorboards of the farm house porch creaked under their feet. The pair of black boots and black trainers left muddy footprints on the wood as the two men advanced towards the front door. The sky above them was dark, filled with ominous clouds as thunder echoed around them. The rain would start soon. Two guns took aim at the front door, one a Beretta 92FS and the other a Browning BDA. The house appeared to be abandoned. No people. No walkers._

_The man wearing the boots wore dark blue slim jeans with a thigh holster strapped to his right leg. The top he wore underneath his unzipped B3 bomber jacket was black. One of his brown hair bangs was longer than the other, dropping down and almost covering his left eye. He placed one of his hands on the doorknob, the coldness of the metal failing to penetrate the insulation of his black fingerless glove.  He turned to his companion._

_His companion wore black skinny jeans and a dark blue hoody. His blonde hair was combed back so that it stood tall on top of his head. His brown eyes moved between the door and the blue eyes of his companion. The gun in his hands shook as he fought with his nerves. He wasn’t used to going on supply runs._

_“Are you ready?” Jason asked, noticing how nervous his companion was._

_Kellin swallowed quickly and nodded. “Yeah. Let’s just do it.”_

_With a nod between them, Jason swung open the door and stepped in with his gun raised. There was only silence. A sudden loud crash of thunder caused them both to jump on the spot. They laughed at how tense they were and began searching the farmhouse._

_After ten minutes they had finished their search. The supplies found had been few and far between with only knives and some canned food being the reward for their efforts. Outside the rain was pelting down as thunder roared across the sky and lightning flashed brightly in the distance. Looking out the front door made them both freeze in place. The crash of thunder had driven the walkers wild and a flash of lightning revealed a large herd of undead that was marching towards the farmhouse. The herd had surrounded the car they had used to get to the farm leaving them stranded with no escape. Running into the woodland was far too risky._

_“What do we do?” Kellin asked nervously. The undead still terrified him._

_“Look for a basement or an attic.” Jason answered, trying to think quickly. “We’ll hide in there.”_

_Kellin quickly rushed off in search of a basement on the ground floor. Jason stood watch to keep an eye on the advancing herd and how close it was getting. Eventually he heard Kellin call his name and abandoned his position to go find his lover._

_At the back of the dining room next to a grandfather clock was a door in the floor. Kellin had already opened it to reveal a set of stairs. Jason gave him a nod. Kellin descended the stairs into the basement with Jason close behind him, closing the door after him. The walkers wouldn’t see or hear them down in the basement and they hoped no one would steal the car._

_“Jason?” Kellin announced in wonderment._

_Jason reached the bottom of the staircase and looked at the shelves in the basement. They were stocked with canned foods, bottles of water, clothes, some weapons and taped up cardboard boxes. All the supplies of the family of the house appeared to be there in front of them. The two young men had found a gold mine in terms of supplies._

_“There’s more than enough here for us.” Jason commented, walking around. “More than we can carry.”_

_“Can’t take it anywhere until those things go away.” Kellin sighed, looking up and imagining the walkers marching through the house._

_“I told you supply runs weren’t much fun.” Jason answered, still looking at all the shelves and supplies._

_“Well, I wanted to come this time.” Kellin replied softly, playing with the strings on his hoody._

_Jason stopped his inspection and looked over at Kellin. “Why did you want to come anyway?”_

_“I was hoping this would happen, actually.” Kellin answered, his gaze going to the floor._

_Jason gave him a confused look and walked up to his boyfriend. “That we would get trapped?”_

_Kellin looked at him and shook his head. “Not trapped, just…alone.”_

_“We have plenty of time on our own back at camp.” Jason commented, not sure what his lover was trying to say._

_Kellin let out an exasperated sigh. “No, I mean really alone.”_

_Jason tried to ask another question but he was silenced when Kellin crashed their lips together. Jason stumbled back at the force of the kiss until his back hit the wall of the basement. He groaned lowly as Kellin bit his bottom lip gently. Kellin grabbed one of Jason’s gloved hands and brought it down to the front of his skinny jeans. Jason moaned as he felt Kellin’s hardness. This is what he had meant by alone._

_“Oh.” Jason gasped out in realisation. “You could have just asked.”_

_Kellin giggled at his lover’s reaction. “I know but I like to surprise you.”_

_Kellin’s hand travelled down until it was palming Jason through his slim jeans, earning a moan from the older teen. As he rubbed Jason through the fabric his mouth found Jason’s neck which it planted kisses on before biting it gently._

_“I want you.” Kellin breathed against his neck._

_“You have me.” Jason answered and pulled him in for a strong kiss._

_The thunder crashed in the skies far above them, totally forgotten by the two lovers._

Jason’s body rocked back and forth as somebody shook him from his sleep. His thoughts from the previous night slowly came back to him. He had dug the extra graves out of respect before being ordered to go to sleep by Maggie. He had curled up with Carl and couldn’t remember falling asleep but he obviously had. Jason yawned and opened his eyes, blinking rapidly as they adjusted to the brightness of the midday sun.

Long dark hair and a sheriff’s hat came into view before the smooth and gentle face of Carl. Carl smiled upon meeting Jason’s gaze and quickly closed the gap between them to give him a small kiss.

“Maggie said you were allowed to sleep in.” Carl told him. “But its midday now.”

Jason yawned again and smiled up at his younger lover. “Should have woken me sooner.”

Jason sat up and looked around. The others were out of sight and he wasn’t sure where they were but he assumed they were outside. He wrapped his arms around Carl’s smaller frame and pulled him in for a longer, deeper kiss. When they broke apart, Carl looked a little surprised.

“Good morning.” Jason greeted with a cheeky grin before he stood up.

Jason stretched his arms and legs to rid himself of the morning stiffness and strapped his holster back on his right leg and his machete to his belt.

“Where is everyone?” Jason asked, looking around.

“Waiting for you.” Carl told him. “We’re about to start the service.”

Jason felt immediately guilty for having slept in so late. He knew Maggie had allowed it but he still felt it was disrespectful. Without uttering a word he marched out the door and quickly headed for the grave site as Carl followed closely behind him.

“I’m sorry for keeping you waiting, truly.” Jason told the others as he reached them and took his place.

“Don’t be.” Rick told him.

“We never got to properly say goodbye to Jimmy, Patricia and Hershel.” Glenn explained. “So we appreciate this.”

Jason noticed that Father Gabriel was at the front of them all. He stood at the foot of the graves with an open bible in his hands.

“You found a bible?” Jason asked him. He didn’t remember anyone having one.

“Yes. It was in the master bedroom.” Gabriel replied.

Jason nodded in understanding and said no more. He quickly figured out that the master bedroom would have been Hershel’s bedroom, hence why Maggie was so silent. Hershel had been a religious man so it was appropriate that a bible verse would be read out at his memorial service. They all fell silent so that Gabriel could read out the one that he had selected.

“The Lord is compassionate and gracious,  
Slow to anger, abounding in love.  
He will not always accuse,  
Nor will he harbour his anger for ever;  
He does not treat us as our sins deserve  
Or repay us according to our iniquities.  
For as high as the heavens are above the earth,  
So great is his love for those who fear him;  
As far as the east is from the west,  
So far has he removed our transgressions from us.  
As a father has compassion on his children,  
So the Lord has compassion on those who fear him;  
For he knows how we are formed,  
He remembers that we are dust.  
As for man, his days are like grass,  
He flourishes like a flower of the field;  
The wind blows over it and it is gone,  
And its place remembers it not more.  
But from everlasting to everlasting  
The Lord's love is with those who fear him.”

There were less tears than there had been for Beth’s funeral. The deaths of Jimmy, Patricia and Hershel, though no less important, had been given time to settle in the minds of the group. The only one who had tears fall was Maggie. Rick looked upon the grave that represented Hershel. He remembered the smile he gave him from the other side of the fence. Hershel had been proud of Rick’s attempt to parley with the Governor. He probably wouldn’t approve of the more beast-like man that Rick had allowed himself to become after all this time on the road.

_"You step outside, you risk your life. You take a drink of water, you risk your life. And nowadays you breathe, and you risk your life. Every moment now...you don't have a choice. The only thing you can choose is what you are risking it for!”_

Remembering Hershel’s willingness to risk his life for the sake of others made Rick reconsider. It may not have been the most ideal, humane way to be but Hershel would have understood Rick’s brutality. The best way to honour Hershel would be to never let the beast inside assume full control.

As the group returned to the camp at the front of the farm house with the fire truck and white van, the all-important question was asked. They needed to know if Rick had a plan for where to go and what to do. Eugene had suggested Washington, despite not being able to save the world he had done the math and came to the conclusion that the safest place would be there. Politicians and government officials would also have the best defences at their disposal.

Rick leaned his back against the white van and kept his hands in his jacket pockets as he explained his own plan to the group.

“We go to Richmond, Virginia.” Rick to them as they gathered round. “Noah lived in a community there.”

“Is it safe?” Jason asked quickly. He wasn’t prepared to travel so many miles for nothing.

“It _was_ secure. It has walls, homes, twenty people.” Rick explained. “Beth wanted to go with him. She wanted to get him there.”

Rick had considered the options overnight. Though there was little guarantee that the community would still be there they needed a destination. If the community was still there then it could finally be the lucky break they needed. If it was gone then they would continue as they were.

“It’s a long trip but if it works out, it’s the last long trip we have to make.” Rick finished.

“What if it isn’t around anymore?” Glenn asked. He knew it was most likely gone.

“Then we keep going.” Rick answered. They could never give up.

“Then we find a new place.” Michonne added. They would keep searching.

Rick nodded to this, as did the others. “Let’s get going.”

 

The drive north was uneventful and felt never ending. Conversations were had along the way but they were few and far between as everyone was still getting over Beth’s death. After losing so many people in such a short time frame they were once again on the move to promises of a safe haven. Noah was confident that the community would still be standing when they reached it but the general atmosphere amongst the group was that it wouldn’t be. It had been many months since Noah was last at the community and a lot can happen in that time.

Jason looked out the window as the world flew by. He rested his elbow on the base of the window and rested his cheek against his fist. Half the time he would take in the outside world but most of the time he was miles away, wrapped up in his thoughts. On occasion his thoughts would shift to the sights that they passed. Car crashes, dead bodies, wandering walkers and abandoned buildings. All of them told a story. How had the car crash taken place? Was anyone injured? What happened after? How did the people die? Who were they when they were alive? Did any of their loved ones survive? Who had lived in those houses? Who had worked in those shops? What had that town been like before? Jason’s silent answers to these questions ranged from the innocent to the grotesque. There was no way of knowing and no one left who would care.

Carl sat to the right of Jason. He leaned into Jason and was held there by Jason’s right arm which was wrapped around him. In his hands, Carl held Jason’s diary which he had asked to read during the drive. He was interested in the passages that detailed what life had been like for a teenager before the apocalypse. Video games, going to the cinema, going to concerts, going out for walks or to clubs for drinks and dancing. The awkwardness and crazy nature of friendships and relationships and the beauty of the internet. As much as Carl enjoyed reading about the crazy aspects of Jason’s pre-apocalyptic life, it also saddened him to know that he’d never get to experience any of those things.

Jason glanced at Carl who was too engrossed in the diary pages to notice. He wondered what life would have been like had he met Carl in a world without the apocalypse. It was most likely that they would never have ended up together because of their age gap and if they had been together then it would have been Rick throwing him in jail. He just wished he could let Carl experience the years of teenage fun that he himself had enjoyed. Jason also considered how different things would have been if Kellin had lived. He wouldn’t have looked at Carl twice if that had been the case. Despite being in a new relationship he could never deny that he was still infatuated with Kellin. He looked back out the window and sighed. Kellin was in a better place.

 

The engine let out a loud blast of heated air as the fire truck came to a stop. It was running low on fuel so the group was forced to stop in what appeared to be a quiet town to find new vehicles. They gathered round the fire truck and van and made plans on who went where. Carol was too injured to go anywhere. Father Gabriel, Eugene and Noah weren’t very capable and chose to stay behind. Rosita, Tara and Abraham opted to stay by the vehicles to protect them and the others should something unexpected happen.

Rick, Daryl, Glenn, Maggie, Sasha, Tyreese, Michonne and Jason prepared their weapons and bags for the supply run. The plan was to search for supplies in the local houses and try to get one or two cars, preferably vans or people carriers, started up to replace the fire truck. As they prepped themselves, Carl walked up to Jason’s side as he checked his own gun.

“Carl, I want you to keep an eye on Judith.” Rick told him, instantly noticing the boy’s approach.

“I want to help.” Carl countered. “I’ve done it before.”

“Carl…” Rick began his retort.

“He can come with me.” Jason interrupted. “We make a good team.”

Carl smiled in response to Jason’s comment and his general defence. He had sided with Rick back at the church about Atlanta and this time he was siding with Carl. It proved that Jason was willing to be fair. Rick studied Jason for a moment, unsure of what to say.

“Rick, I’ll bring him back.” Jason commented, sensing the uncertainty.

Rick looked down the street of the town they were about to search. Straight ahead of where they stood on the other side of the long street was an expensive house. It was in clear view of the van and fire truck. Rick nodded.

“Sasha, keep a lookout from the truck.” Rick told her. “If anything happens, you’ll have a clear view of the street.”

“Sure.” Sasha answered and headed for the fire truck.

Rick turned back to Jason and Carl. “You two take the house at the bottom of the street then come straight back here.”

“Got it.” Jason agreed with a nod.

With a gesture from Jason, Carl followed him down the long barren street towards the house at the very end of it. The rest of the group split up in different directions, mostly in pairs. The house in the distance looked large and expensive. This would have been a town for rich people before the apocalypse. Carl kept his head low as they walked, his hat effectively blocking the sun from reaching his face. He was quieter than normal but Jason chalked it up to Beth’s passing.

“Is all of this really worth it?” Carl asked out of the blue.

Jason was stunned by the question along with the spontaneous nature of it. He hadn’t expected Carl to be doubting their efforts this late into the apocalypse.

“For a safe place to live, yeah, it’s worth it.” Jason answered optimistically.

“What if this community is gone?” Carl asked. “Do we just keep going from place to place?”

“For a while. Until we find somewhere or make a place ourselves.” Jason replied.

“Do you honestly believe that will happen?” Carl responded in frustration.

“Yes, I do.” Jason answered as they reached the house. “If we give up then we’re already dead.”

The conversation trailed off as they reached the front door. They walked up to it and pulled out their guns, Carl with his Beretta 92FS and Jason with his Springfield Armory TRP Operator. Jason placed his hand on the doorknob and glanced at Carl to see if he was ready. Carl gave him a nod so he swung the door open as the both stepped inside, aiming in opposite directions.

The house appeared to be abandoned. With a silent nod, Jason led the way into the kitchen with his gun raised and guiding his movements. The kitchen was trashed with large blood stains on the table but was otherwise vacant. Carl started searching the drawers and cupboards for knives and supplies as Jason did the same on the other side of the kitchen. Every cupboard door they opened revealed an empty shelf behind it. The kitchen had obviously been cleared long ago.

Carl let out a defeated sigh. He had hoped they would find at least one can of food or something similar. Even the drawers had been cleared of knives and forks. People had been through the town long before them and hadn’t left anything behind. A pair of arms wrapped around his waist from behind him. He recognised the arms and leaned back against them with a smile. Jason kissed the back of Carl’s neck and rubbed his front gently.

“Plenty of other rooms to search, poppet.” Jason cooed in Carl’s ear.

Carl loved the moments they got to share with each other. Simple touches and embraces. The nickname that Jason had just used confused him slightly. He had never heard it before but he liked it. People only ever called him Carl. Poppet was new. It made him feel special and loved.

Jason broke away from Carl and took out his gun again. He aimed at a closed door at the end of the kitchen and slowly made his way towards it. Carl followed him, checking over his shoulder for any walkers or people that might sneak up on them undetected. Jason reached the door and slowly opened it as he aimed into the room. It appeared to be some kind of spare room with a television and sofa. The consoles below the television told him that it had been a games room.

Suddenly a stiff pair of hands descended on him from behind the opened door. One of the walker’s cold, stiff hands slammed into Jason’s hands and caused him to drop his gun to the floor. As the young man tried to move the walker’s other hand grasped his shoulder and leaned forward. Before Jason could build momentum the walker bit his arm as strongly as it could. Jason shouted in fear as he struggled against the corpse’s grip while he tried to reach his knife or machete.

Witnessing the walker bite Jason’s arm provoked a shriek of grief and terror from Carl. It was so loud that it stabbed at Jason’s ears before a gunshot echoed around them. The bullet slammed through the walker’s head and decimated its brains. The corpse fell to the floor as Jason collapsed back against the wall. Carl rushed towards him as fast as he could in shock and panic, tears already starting to fall from his eyes. He didn’t know what to do. Was he strong enough to chop Jason’s arm off with his machete in time to stop the infection?

“Carl…Carl…Carl.” Jason attempted to get the boy’s attention.

Carl finally looked back up at Jason, coming out of his panicked mind set. He observed Jason’s calm expression and looked down at his left arm. Grey scratches on the leather sleeve of his jacket marked where the walker had bit down. There was no damage.

“It didn’t get me, Carl.” Jason told him, knowing he was slowly connecting the dots. “They can’t bite through leather.”

Carl’s tears appeared to fall faster, this time in relief that his boyfriend wasn’t going to die or have to go through an amputation. He jumped forward and hugged Jason strongly, causing Jason’s head to bang against the wall behind him. The older teen wrapped his arms around his younger lover tightly and cooed into his ear.

“It’s okay. I’m not going anywhere yet.” Jason said softly in Carl’s ear.

Jason gently rocked back and forward to soothe Carl. Although the action was mostly to soothe Carl it was also to calm himself down from the scare he just had. If his hands weren’t on Carl’s back they would be shaking like leaves in the wind. The sound of multiple footsteps thundered through the house towards them before Rick, Daryl, Glenn and Tyreese all burst through the doorway with their weapons drawn.

“What happened?” Rick barked, concerned for his son’s wellbeing and that of Jason.

Jason closed his eyes in shame. “I made a stupid mistake and got bit in the arm.”

Rick immediately unsheathed his machete and approached them.

“It bit my jacket!” Jason explained quickly. “Their teeth can’t go through leather!”

Jason raised his arm to Rick to show the marks on the sleeve. Rick studied it for a moment, making sure there were no tears or signs of blood. It didn’t take much for the infection to set in.

“Carl, you okay?” Rick asked his son, crouching down next to them.

Carl turned his head to look back at his dad and nodded, his hat rubbing against Jason. His eyes were red from crying but his breathing showed that he was calming down.

“He just got a fright.” Jason commented.

“You need to be more careful.” Rick warned him.

Jason nodded in response as Rick stood up again. He looked around the room and could tell that the house was vacant of supplies. He turned back to Jason and Carl.

“We found a couple vans.” Rick told them. “We should get going.”

Jason nodded before Rick turned round and walked out the room, closely followed by Daryl. Jason rubbed Carl’s back before standing up and collecting his gun from the floor. Carl followed Daryl and his father out the door while Tyreese choose to hang back with Jason. The two men started walking together.

“What you have, you and Carl, it’s a good thing.” Tyreese commented as they walked out into the street. “Cherish it. I lost someone I loved back at the prison.”

Jason thought for a moment. He didn’t know Tyreese all that well as they rarely spoke to one another and he was too much of a pacifist for Jason’s liking. He supported his relationship with Carl, however, which earned the gentle giant a degree of respect in that moment.

“I had someone before. Kellin. I met him before all this happened.” Jason explained, still uncomfortable with explaining it to anyone. “He was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I lost him seven months ago.”

Tyreese remained respectfully quiet. He knew what it was like to lose a loved one to the apocalypse and he didn’t dare ask how Kellin died. It didn’t matter. He had died because the apocalyptic world they lived in was cruel.

“I wanted to die. I tried to die.” Jason continued. “For months on my own, trying to have it all end. But it never did.”

“Because you didn’t give up. That’s why you’re still alive.” Tyreese answered with a soft smile. “You chose life. And now you have Carl. He needs you and you need him. It’s a good thing you’re still here.”

“I guess.” Jason shrugged his shoulders.

Jason viewed meeting Carl as luck. He always seemed to get lucky and he was smart enough to know that his luck would one day run out. Jason just wanted to spend the time between now and that day in the best way possible and that was with Carl. He’d do anything to keep Carl safe. He’d kill anyone.

“Tyreese… you have your head screwed on right.” Jason commented, referring to the large man’s moral compass. “Can I ask your opinion on something?”

“Sure.” Tyreese responded with a nod.

Jason stopped walking and so did Tyreese. He wanted it to be a private discussion.

“In the camp I was in with Kellin, there was a guy who tried to steal him.” Jason explained. “Tried to rape him and threatened both him and me on multiple occasions.”

Tyreese nodded as Jason explained, waiting for the question while taking in all the information the younger man was willing to give.

“I went on a run with him and I want to know if what I did was right.” Jason continued.

_Jason searched the shelves of the warehouse they were in. His Beretta 92FS was holstered on his thigh as it would be unwise to fire a gun inside. The place was large and there were walkers roaming the hallways and aisles. He held a crowbar in his hands, knowing that it would be far quieter for dispatching any of the undead should they happen across him. There were too many corpses in the building for them to draw attention. At the opposite end of the large storeroom, Tony, the slightly older male was searching another set of shelves. Jason couldn’t believe that he had to go on a supply run with someone he hated, a man who had tried to rape Kellin several times already. He had the temptation to murder Tony but now that the dead had risen it didn’t seem right to kill the living._

_A loud crash echoed through the large storeroom as Tony clumsily knocked something over. Numerous undead groans answered the sound as the walkers in the room began shuffling towards the room he was in. Jason kept his head low as several walkers stumbled past him, too fixated on the source of the crash to look at anything else. Jason knew the room Tony was in only had one way in. Once the walkers had passed him he looked down the aisle and saw that Tony was indeed trapped in the room. The older man had started shooting the approaching corpses in a blind panic which only helped to attract more of them._

_Jason grabbed his gun and considered how many rounds were in the clip. He hadn’t used the gun so he still had fifteen rounds. There were over twenty walkers in the room and more would come but between Tony and himself, they had enough ammo to kill all of them. They had enough ammo to save Tony so he could return to camp where he would continue to intimidate Kellin. Jason paused. Tony was attracting the dead towards him through his own lack of thought and was incredibly selfish. Jason’s priority was getting back to Kellin, alive and well._

_Jason holstered his gun and gripped the crowbar tightly in his hands in case he needed it. Once another walker had passed by he slipped out in the opposite direction of all the commotion. Tony was serving as a fantastic distraction for the walkers which would allow Jason to walk out unscathed. He knew Tony’s fate was sealed when the gunshots stopped and the screams began…_

“Was it wrong to leave him for dead like that?” Jason asked. “I mean, I could have saved him.”

Tyreese thought for a moment. It was a tricky one as both men could have escaped the warehouse but Jason’s explanation of the kind of man Tony was changed things.

“There’s a difference between killing someone and not saving them.” Tyreese told the younger man. “You did it to protect someone and this guy, he would have left you for dead too, right?”

Jason thought for a moment. There was no question that Tony would have relished the opportunity to get him out of the picture so he could have Kellin to himself.

“Yeah, I don’t doubt he would have tried to kill me eventually.” Jason answered. It was true. Their fights had been getting more intense.

“Then you did what was necessary.” Tyreese answered. “It’s not about right or wrong.”

The sudden sound of a horn made them both jump and look towards the two vans. Abraham was leaning out of the window of the front van, his hand on the horn.

“You two have thirty seconds to get your asses in here before we leave without you!” Abraham threatened, yet his smirk betrayed the tone of his voice.

Tyreese and Jason nodded and quickly made their way back to the vans. They climbed in the front van with Tyreese sitting next to Carol and Jason next to Carl. Carl immediately cuddled into Jason, still slightly shaken by the close call they had back in the house. Jason leaned into Carl and wrapped an arm around him as Abraham gunned the engine and the two vans drove off. It was a hundred miles to Virginia. They had a long road ahead.

 

**So the chapter is finally done. I’d like to apologise for the agonisingly long wait but I was ill for two and a half weeks and therefore unable to get much writing done. I felt a filler chapter to show Beth’s funeral was necessary and I don’t mind making call backs.**

**The next chapters will follow the episodes. I can’t wait to get caught up with the show as I think it will be a lot of fun having Jason in Alexandria.**

**Thanks again for all the follows/subscriptions/favourites/kudos/votes.**

**Thanks to the reviewers of the chapter 13: rk0192, Belle Blu, sexy10, emilyymjoness, zakhaev1, jar98, Sara, kgbufo, kingcarlgrimes and eballztyme.**

**If you want an extra Easter egg, check the first letter of each chapter title. :P**

**Anyways, be sure to review and comment. Let me know what you like/don’t like. Suggestions for scenes are welcome. I’ll try to get chapter 15 up as soon as possible, and hopefully far quicker than this one!**


	15. Inquietude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group travels over 500 miles to Virginia to find Noah's Community. Will they find sanctuary or horror? And what effect will it have on Jason and Carl?

The fire truck and van sped down the dirty, leaf littered roads together. They passed by old car wrecks and wandering walkers on their travels. It was the second day of their five hundred mile journey to Virginia. It held the danger of unknown threats but it equally held the promise of sanctuary within the walls of Noah’s community. They all hoped that the community was still there and they could finally relax.

The fire truck and van came to a stop at the remains of a large car crash. At least ten cars had been involved. The truck and van both needed fuel so Abraham had suggested that they stop to try and extract some fuel from the crashed cars. The plan was quickly agreed to with Rick, Glenn, Daryl, Rosita, and Abraham going car to car in search of fuel.

Carl was with Tyreese as they worked together to feed Judith as a way of keeping her quiet so she didn’t attract any unwanted attention. Most of the others either stayed in the vehicles or kept a lookout for any approaching danger. Jason had opted to sit on top of the fire truck to get some fresh air and keep a lookout. He heard someone climb the ladder on the back of the truck and turned to greet them as they made their way to the top. He was surprised to see that it was the young woman, Tara.

“Hey.” She cheerfully greeted with a smile.

Jason narrowed his eyes due to the sunlight and let a smirk form on the corner of his mouth. “Hey.”

“You okay?” Tara asked the young man with a tilt of her head as she sat next to him.

Jason furrowed his brow in confusion. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”

“You’re usually with Carl, that’s all.” Tara commented, having observed their closeness.

“Well, we’re not super glued together.” Jason remarked sarcastically.

Tara smiled and looked down at her feet. “You’re lucky. You both are.”

Jason hesitated. He knew she was referring to their relationship. He hadn’t made the relationship official with a formal statement but everyone was perceptive enough to be aware of it. The darker tone in Tara’s voice told him they could relate.

“Who did you lose?” He finally asked softly.

“My girlfriend. She and I were with the Governor when he attacked.” Tara explained. “I found her body.”

Jason reached over and placed his hand over one of hers. She looked at him as he smiled back at her softly.

“I’m sorry. I lost my boyfriend seven months ago.” Jason explained to her gently. “I know what you’re going through.”

“How long does it take to get through it?” Tara asked him, opening up more than she had done before.

“Forever.” Jason answered honestly. “But you’re with family who you can share that pain with.”

Tara smiled weakly and nodded. The group was one big family and she appreciated them all. She was lucky to not be alone. They all were. Before their discussion could continue a call from Rick signalled that it was time to continue moving.

 

On the third evening they had stopped off to sleep for the night. While most of the group had secured the perimeter, Maggie was in charge of building the fire. She had successfully done so and was now crying in front of it. She still hadn’t got over Beth’s death. Each day without her little sister in the group after coming so close to seeing her again tore her apart. Jason sat down next to her but didn’t speak. Shortly after that Carl sat with him. Then Glenn sat on the other side of Maggie. One by one each member of the group sat with her around the fire, most of them in silence. Maggie may have lost her sister but she was still surrounded by family.

 

Glenn and Jason were on opposite ends of the room. It was the fourth day and they had stopped off for a supply run in a small, abandoned town. It wasn’t near any other settlements so they had been right to assume that very few people had come through it scavenging supplies.

“Do you think you’ll ever get married, you know, in the future?” Glenn asked Jason as he searched various drawers.

Jason stepped over one of the walker’s corpses as he placed some cans in his bag.

“I thought they didn’t approve of that before.” Jason commented, referring to the debate over gay marriage.

“The old world is gone.” Glenn answered with a shrug. “So, would you?”

Jason thought for a moment as he searched another cupboard. “I don’t see the need really. I’m his and he’s mine. That’s enough for me.”

“You still gave him that necklace to match yours.” Glenn pointed out. “You wanted something to represent your relationship.”

Jason smiled and conceded with a nod. “Well, I’ll let Carl decide on the whole marriage thing.”

Glenn’s face turned serious, remembering how easily he nearly lost Maggie on several occasions.

“Don’t leave it too long.” He warned. “We never know what’s going to happen.”

 

It was the fifth day of their journey and the sun was high in the sky. It was noon. While the most able-bodied members of the group were on a supply run, Jason sat at the back of the van and was busy cleaning out his gun. He hadn’t had to use it in a few days and he wanted to make sure it was always ready to fire. From around the side of the van Noah made his way round and stood to his side.

“Hey…uh…Jason, can I ask you something?” Noah asked, hoping he wasn’t being rude.

“Technically you just did but sure.” Jason answered, loading his gun and flicking the safety on. “What’s on your mind?”

“What age are you?” Noah asked him hesitantly.

Jason narrowed his eyes. He wasn’t sure if the question was innocent or Noah was about to pass judgement on the age gap between himself and Carl. He hesitated.

“Nineteen.” Jason finally answered. “Why?”

Noah’s face lit up in surprise. “We’re the same age! I was thinking about that.”

Jason smiled at the simple joy Noah got out of having something as simple as age in common with him. It was also very telling of the different people they were and the different worlds they came from. Noah was still very pure and innocent for the most part. Jason had lost his sanity before and was never far from losing it again. He hoped nothing would cause him to lose it again. He swore he’d always protect Carl and the rest of the group.

 

It was the morning of the sixth day. Everyone was getting ready to pack up and continue the journey towards Virginia. If they were lucky there would be less road blocks and therefore less detours. The journey felt like it was taking much longer than it had to.

Jason and Tyreese sat with baby Judith while everyone continued to get things organised. Judith had just been fed and was cradled snuggly in Tyreese’s large arms. The two of them had been talking for a while.

“My younger self hated school. I knew I needed the education but it was so boring.” Jason was telling the larger man about his past. “I’d kill to have that life back now.”

Tyreese sighed with him. “I think we all would.”

“So, what did you do before all this?” Jason asked the man. He had a lot of respect for Tyreese since their talk a week before.

“I was an NFL player.” Tyreese explained with a nostalgic smile.

“That’s where I know you from!” Jason exclaimed, much to Tyreese’s confusion. “I always had the feeling I knew you.”

“You don’t seem the sporty type.” Tyreese commented with a smile.

“I’m not but one of my friends was obsessed with the NFL.” Jason explained with a matching smile. “And you, Tyreese Williams, were his favourite player.”

Tyreese smiled with pride. “I’m glad to hear that.”

Jason smiled but lowered his head. “Just wish he was here to meet you.”

Jason felt guilty for making the comment as it had brought them back to the dark reality they lived in. The joking was over and it was back to business. They had a lot of miles to cover and a lot more danger to encounter.

 

The fire truck and van continued their constant journey down the desolate roads. In the back of the van Jason looked across at Carol who was sitting up in a much more normal manner than she had previously.

“How you feeling?” He asked her.

“Better.” Carol answered simply. She didn’t know Jason that well and preferred to limit contact.

“Good.” Jason answered, playing the same game.

It had been a week since they left the farm and he had been attempting to get conversation out of Carol ever since. He could tell how calculating and perceptive a woman she was, reminding him of someone he used to know. Jason also had noticed she stuck close to the oldest members of the group. She was very much a mystery to him but he was grateful for her actions back at Terminus. He had a feeling he would get through to her yet.

 

It was pitch black on the eighth night. They were parked up in a forest away from the road and any settlements to avoid attracting attention. Jason’s eyes fluttered open as he had trouble sleeping. He always had trouble sleeping. He turned his head to the right to find Carl still snuggled up beside him, sound asleep. Jason couldn’t help but smile at the image of Carl sleeping. He always looked so peaceful.

A flicker of red and orange caught his peripheral vision and got him to turn his head to the left so he could peer out the window. The camp fire was still burning yet he was sure they had put it out before going to sleep for the night. Jason gently eased Carl to his other side so that he could move without waking the boy. He slowly opened the fire truck door and stepped outside.

Next to the burning camp fire was Daryl. He sat cross legged and was staring blankly into the fire. His crossbow was in hand should anything happen. Jason recognised the expression of pain on the archer’s face. Daryl was known to hide his emotions and often had a good poker face but Jason could see the pain because of his own experiences. He silently walked over to the fire, pleased to feel its warmth upon him and crouched down near Daryl.

“Daryl?” Jason whispered in an attempt to get his attention.

Daryl continued to gaze into the flames.

“Daryl?” Jason repeated a little louder.

Daryl finally broke his gaze from the fire and turned to look at Jason, his face as expressionless as ever.

“You need to sleep.” Jason suggested. “You can’t burn yourself out like this.”

“Why do you care?” Daryl asked cynically. They barely knew each other.

“Because that’s what I do. I care.” Jason answered, standing back up to his full height. “And I know you do too.”

Daryl didn’t respond right away. Jason sighed and headed back to the fire truck. He was tired and just wanted to sleep next to Carl for however many hours were left before daybreak. Once Jason had returned to the fire truck, Daryl stood up and stamped out the fire with dirt.

 

In the late afternoon of the ninth day, the fire truck’s engine finally died. They had stopped a short distance away from what looked to be an industrial district, so Rick, Glenn, Daryl and Tyreese headed out in search of a new vehicle to replace the fire truck.

Jason and Carl sat inside the fire truck and were taking care of Judith in Rick’s absence. Jason had the baby in his arms and was rocking her back and forth gently. He had gotten used to having a baby around. Before the apocalypse he found babies and young children to be incredibly annoying but something about Judith was different. She was a light of hope.

Rosita opened the door and stepped inside the truck with a quick greeting. She had her first aid bag on her and had taken out a thermometer and stethoscope. Carl was quick to notice and was aware of Rosita’s rough medical knowledge. He felt a slight anxiety shoot through him.

“Is everything okay?” He asked the Hispanic woman.

Rosita smiled and nodded. “Yeah, I think so. Just wanted to check on Judith.”

Jason nodded and moved closer to Rosita so she could perform a couple quick check-ups on the baby girl. The last thing the group needed was for the baby to die, she was a symbol of innocence and was the hope of the future. They would protect her no matter what.

 

“Son of a bitch!” Abraham cursed as he took in the sight before them.

It was the tenth day and they had just encountered a large blockade in the road. It looked like the scene of a battle with many burnt out or crumpled cars, bullet casings, dead bodies and blood stains. The multitude of wrecks covered the entire road and a few fallen trees made it impossible to drive round.

“Abraham, need I remind you that there is a baby in here?” Jason called to the man from the back of the people carrier. “If Judith’s first words are any of your vulgarities then Rick will cut out your tongue.”

“Rick and that little one have more to worry about than some damn words.” Abraham argued back.

He forcefully performed a U-turn and guided the rest of the group who were following in the van to go back to one of the previous turn-offs and attempt to continue from there. The journey was taking much longer than they had expected.

 

Jason looked out the window of the van as a signpost for South Carolina flew past. They had been on the road for eleven days and he was getting sick of the claustrophobia of the vehicles. In reality, he just really wanted to get to Noah’s community and finally relax. He wanted to be able to sleep in a proper bed. He wanted to stay in a house and if Rick would allow it, stay in a house and a share a bed with Carl. The world outside always seemed to grow more and more depressing with all the death, destruction and desolation that surrounded them.

“Jason, I wish to inquire your preference on digitised entertainment systems.” Eugene spoke up, addressing the younger man.

Jason looked at him with one eyebrow raised in utter confusion. “In English this time, please?”

“What were your favourite video games?” Eugene repeated in simpler language.

Jason thought for a moment, casting his mind back to another life. “Anything with a decent story really, GTA, Metal Gear Solid, Assassin’s Creed. Loads really.”

“What about Portal?” Glenn asked, as it had been one of his favourite games.

“I loved Portal!” Jason exclaimed in memory. “God, don’t get me started!”

“Why not?” Carl chipped in. “We’ve not got anything else to talk about.”

 

The twelfth night was a quiet one. Almost everyone was gathered round the camp fire except for Jason and Carl who had slipped away from the group to the other side of the vans. Carl’s back was against the side of the van and his arms were round Jason’s neck as the two of them locked lips and indulged in one another. Apart from the odd kiss before sleeping or when waking up they had had little time to do anything because the rest of the group was with them all the time. They needed some relief even if it was only for a few minutes.

The sound of movement off to their left caught their attention and made them break apart. Jason’s hand instinctively reached for his gun as he turned his head to the source of the sound but relaxed when he saw that it was Gabriel. The priest stared back and did not speak.

“What?” Jason asked, wondering why he was watching them.

Father Gabriel shook his head and swallowed. “Nothing.”

Jason stepped towards the man. “It’s obviously not nothing.”

“I do not approve of this.” Father Gabriel replied nervously. “It is sinful and an insult to the Lord.”

Jason narrowed his eyes and closed the gap between them. Gabriel cowered away from him and ended up with his back against the van as he swallowed nervously under Jason’s angry gaze.

“I don’t care. We don’t need your approval.” Jason growled at him. “How dare you talk to me about what is sinful after what you did!”

“But homosexuality is an abomination in the eyes of God!” Father Gabriel tried to argue. All sins were equal so what he did didn’t absolve Jason of his wrong doings.

Jason scoffed and grabbed Gabriel’s shirt by the collar. “Look around. Do you honestly believe God gives a damn about any of us? Is that why so many people are dead? His endless love killed them? What a joke!”

Before Gabriel could answer, Tyreese stepped round the corner and took in the sight. “What’s going on?”

Jason sighed and relaxed. He knew better than to cause commotion last at night. “Nothing, we were just having a chat, weren’t we?”

Gabriel nodded as Jason let go of his shirt so that he could slink away back to the campfire. Tyreese stared at Jason in an attempt to understand what had just happened and quickly made sense of it. Jason and Carl were alone together. Father Gabriel interrupted something or said something. He relaxed and returned to the group.

 

Rick and Jason walked down the silent street back towards the rest of the group. They had split into pairs to search the nearby houses for supplies so that they would be in good shape for when they reached Richmond. It was only a few days away.

“He would be proud of you.” Rick stated, breaking the silence between them. “Your father.”

“What makes you say that?” Jason asked, looking at Rick doubtfully.

“Because you’re here. You survived.” Rick explained. “You didn’t give up.”

“I’ve done horrible things, Rick.” Jason answered. He wasn’t very proud of who he had become.

“We’ve all done stuff. We’ve all done things we didn’t like.” Rick told him.

“Is it all worth it?” Jason asked.

The two of them looked ahead at the group. At the front Carl stood with Judith in his arms, a grin on his face from the relief of seeing them both return unharmed.

“Look at Carl.” Rick answered. “You tell me.”

Jason couldn’t help but smile at the sight of Carl. His boyfriend seemed to just glow under the midday sun even after fourteen days on the road.

“Yeah, it’s worth it.”

 

Fifteen days into their journey and they were very close to Richmond. Rick and Abraham had both agreed that they would only need another day or two to get to the community providing there were no major setbacks.

Jason climbed up on top of one of the vans where Sasha sat with her rifle in hand. As usual she was keeping watch and was ready to quietly snipe any threat that approached. He sat next to her and handed her an open can of food with a fork already sat in it.

“Here. Can’t forget to eat.” Jason told her.

They both looked at the horizon as the sun began to rise. Jason always found the sun, moon and stars to be reminders of how small and insignificant they really were. Out in space, nothing and no one cared or even knew what was happening on Earth. It was all so unimportant in the grand scheme of things.

“You’re up early.” Sasha commented.

“I always am.” Jason replied with a small smile. “Just most of the time Carl is a dead weight on top of me so I can’t move until he wakes up.”

Sasha let out a quiet chuckle at that, something they could both joke about and relate to. The absence of Bob weighed heavily on her heart but she still had her brother, Tyreese, and the rest of the group.

“I wouldn’t complain, if I was you.” Sasha told him in a tone that was both joking and serious at the same time.

“Who said I was complaining?” Jason retorted with an understanding smile.

 

_Thunder roared outside as lightning illuminated the cloudy night sky. Rain crashed down from above in a raging torrent as the storm outside continued violently. Inside the protective walls of Jason’s house, Kellin and Jason lay in bed together. They lay with the covers over them and their shirts off so they could embrace with skin against skin._

_Kellin shook with each loud tremor of thunder. “I hate thunderstorms.”_

_Jason smiled softly and pushed some strands of hair out of his lover’s eye. “I know, poppet.”_

_Kellin snaked his arms round Jason’s body once again and pulled him close. As their bodies connected Kellin lifted one of his legs over Jason’s so they could be completely intertwined. He smiled and enjoyed the closeness they shared. He loved nothing more than to snuggle under the sheets with Jason._

_“Jason?” Kellin murmured._

_“Yeah?” Jason asked, looking into Kellin’s chocolate brown eyes._

_“Can I get neck kisses?” Kellin asked. “I really like those.”_

_Jason smiled and nodded. He moved forward slightly and started placing soft kisses down the length of Kellin’s neck. Kellin closed his eyes and rubbed Jason’s back as he let out soft moans in response to each kiss. Jason loved showering Kellin with affection and could never refuse such actions. He moved one of his legs to change his position and felt something hard brush against his thigh. As soon as it did, Kellin let out a soft gasp._

_“Are you trying to tell me you want more than just neck kisses?” Jason whispered in his lover’s ear._

_“Maybe.” Kellin answered and gently bit Jason’s bottom lip before pulling him on top of him._

Jason felt his body being shaken back and forth. It was the seventeenth day of their journey and he had fallen asleep in the van after keeping watch for most of the night before. Carl was the one shaking him just as he heard the slow screeching of the breaks as the van and people carrier came to a halt.

Jason rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and squinted as his eyes adjusted to the sunlight as they stepped out of the vehicles so Rick could tell them his plan. They were still on the road and there were no signs of a community anywhere.

“Listen up! We’re ten miles away from Noah’s place. We don’t know who these people are or if it’s still there anymore.” Rick told them as they all listened closely. “I’ll take Noah, Glenn, Michonne and Tyreese and we’ll go on ahead. We’ll keep in contact with the radio.”

Rick held his radio up in his hand and Carol raised her own. They had done this for supply runs over the previous two weeks and were used to the routine. It allowed for quick communication and better organisation. Rick gestured to the other four and headed for the people carrier.

As the rest of the group watched them leave, Jason snaked his hand down to hold onto Carl’s. He gave it a reassuring squeeze like he had in the church when Abraham had given his speech. The promise of Noah’s community could mean some form of normal, safe life for them. Jason was determined to get that for Carl. He deserved it.

 

The people carrier drove down the empty road, fallen leaves were blown into the air as the vehicle drove over and past them. Tyreese sat at the driver’s seat with Noah in the front passenger seat beside him. Rick, Glenn and Michonne were in the back behind him. All of them were silent. They weren’t far from Noah’s old community and they needed to be prepared for the worst case scenario.

Rick leaned forward. “How far out?”

Noah checked the gauges on the dashboard. “Five miles.”

Rick spoke into his radio. “Hey Carol, we’re half way there. Just wanted to check the range.”

“Everybody’s holding tight.” Carol’s voice sounded from the speaker. “We’ve made it five hundred miles, maybe this can be the easy part.”

“Give us twenty minutes to check in.” Rick told her.

“If we don’t hear from you we’ll come looking.” Carol answered.

“Copy that.” Rick responded and placed the radio back in his pocket.

Noah glanced at Tyreese. “I’ve been wanting to tell you something.”

“What’s that?” Tyreese asked. He was focused on driving but was also curious.

“The trade. It was the right play.” Noah told the larger man. “It worked. It did work. Just something else happened after.”

“It went the way it had to. The way it was always going to.” Tyreese answered with a sigh. The world was cruel and always would be.

“I never wanted to kill anybody before.” Noah continued.

“I never wanted that but it just made it so that I didn’t see anything but what I wanted.” Tyreese answered. "I wasn't facing it.”

“Facing what?” Noah asked, not understanding what Tyreese was referring to.

“What happened, what’s going on.” Tyreese explained.

In the back of the people carrier, Glenn flipped an old music CD over and over while Rick silently listened in on the conversation.

“My dad used to always tell Sasha and me that it was our duty as citizens of the world to keep up with the news.” Tyreese continued. “When I was little and I was in his car, there was always those stories on the radio.”

Michonne glanced out the window to watch the fields and trees move by. A burnt out house caught her eye. It told the story. People had lived there, they had been attacked by people or walkers and in the process the place had caught fire. The owners were probably dead.

“Something happens a thousand miles away or just down the block. Some kind of horror I couldn’t even wrap my head around.” Tyreese sighed. “But he didn’t change the channel, he didn’t turn it off. He just kept listening. To fact it.”

Noah stared back as Tyreese turned his head to look at him for a moment, given how clear the road was.

“Keeping your eyes open. My dad used to always call that the high cost of living.” Tyreese continued his story.

“I lost my dad in Atlanta. He would’ve liked yours.” Noah responded with a smile. “Still got a mum and a couple twin brothers. I hope.”

“I hope so too.” Tyreese nodded, knowing that the chances were slim.

Noah glanced at the dashboard again to check the mileage. “Two more miles.”

He glanced back at Rick who nodded in acknowledgement.

“Let’s pull into the woods. We’ll go on foot. Stay off the road.” Rick told Tyreese.

“We don’t need to.” Noah commented. His community would be safe and friendly.

“Just in case.” Rick stated firmly. They always had to be cautious.

As they drove off the road and into the woods, Glenn snapped the CD that he had been flipping in his hands.

 

Jason and Carl sat on the log of a fallen tree close to where the van was parked. Most of the group had already spread out a little to form a rough perimeter while the waited for Rick and the others to return. Carl held Judith in his arms while Jason pulled faces at the child to make her giggle.

“Well aren’t you a silly little thing.” Jason told the baby while tickling her gently. “Yes you are, just like you’re big brother.”

“How am I silly?” Carl asked with a laugh.

Jason paused and met his stare before returning his attention to Judith so her sweet giggling could continue.

“Because you’re fun in a cute way and you are attracted to me.” Jason replied with a smile.

“Being attracted to you is silly?” Carl questioned with a grin.

“Oh yes, very silly.” Jason joked back. “I’m like a naughty puppy.”

“Because you bite things?” Carl asked, slightly confused but mostly amused.

“No, not that.” Jason replied before adding flirtatiously. “I’ll only bite if you ask me to.”

Carl blushed briefly at this. There were a few places he wouldn’t mind Jason biting. He shook his head so that he could continue to conversation before his thoughts turned perverse.

“Then how are you like a naughty puppy?” Carl asked with a chuckle.

“Because you think I’m cute and you can’t wait to take me home.” Jason answered with a teasing grin. “Then you’re horrified to learn I’m not house trained.”

Carl couldn’t help but laugh at how ridiculous Jason was being. He wasn’t sure why he was being that way either. The older teen had always been more serious and focused than he was being at that current moment. Carl assumed he had simply become far more relaxed about their relationship around the group or he was just that happy to be with Carl in the first place.

“If this community is still there, how do you feel about sharing a room?” Jason asked. His voice shook slightly with nerves. He still didn’t want to cross any lines.

“I’d…I’d like that.” Carl answered hesitantly with a blush.

Jason couldn’t help but twist his mouth into an optimistic smile. The idea of getting to share a room and therefore a bed with Carl excited him. One thing he missed from his time with Kellin was the closeness such a setup would bring. Jason couldn’t wait to be able to relax and just cuddle with Carl for hours.

Jason placed his hand on Carl’s knee and leaned forward to kiss the younger teen. Their lips remained connected for longer than he had originally intended. Neither of them cared if anyone in the group was watching either. A choked out whine broke their kiss as they looked down to Judith whose face was scrunched up.

“Oh I’m sorry, princess!” Jason exclaimed and bent down to kiss her forehead. “Did I stop giving you attention?”

The simple reaction seemed to calm the baby as her face relaxed and the threat of loud crying evaporated.  

 

 

They stopped the people carrier in the woods next to an old car crash. A regular car had crashed into a small canvas truck. By the damage to the paintwork and the dirt and grime on the vehicles, the crash had happened a long time ago. They opened the doors and stepped out of the people carrier.

“This is good.” Rick commented, looking at their parking spot. “Through the trees it might just look like part of the wreck.”

In the car behind him, the silhouette of a female walker banged on the fogged up window from inside, snarling through the glass at them. It was the first stimulation it had received in a long time. The poor woman had probably died in the crash and had reanimated alone and trapped inside.

Noah gestured behind him. “It’s this way.”

With that said, he started walking away from the wreck towards his community with Rick and the others close behind. The walker continued to snarl and bang on the window from inside the car.

The woods were quiet as the group marched through them. Birds tweeted in the trees above them as the leaves rustled in the breeze. There were no walkers and no people. The leaves crunched and crackled under their feet as they continued to make their way towards Noah’s old community. Off to their left, the skeleton of a person lay on the ground with plants sprouting out between its ribs.

Ahead of them were several long lines of wire wrapped round the trees to form a make-shift barricade against walkers. They were close to the community and the wires looked to be maintained.

“Did your people do this?” Michonne asked, turning to Noah.

“Wanted to.” Noah answered. “Must have.”

Michonne kept her hand on the handle of her katana while Rick unsheathed his machete. They were closing in on the community and would have to be ready for the worst. The group carefully stepped over and ducked under the multiple wires so they could get past the barricade.

Noah gasped out in pain as a sharp edge on one of the wires cut him just above the eyebrow. He held the wound with a couple fingers before looking at the blood on his fingertips.

“You alright?” Rick asked, waiting for the others to make it through.

“Yeah…yeah.” Noah answered, breathing heavily from exertion and pain.

Once the whole group had made it through Rick followed them as they continued on. A few minutes later they could see the road through the trees. The vegetation was thick enough that the group would still be invisible to the community up on the road. Rick stopped Noah with a hand on his shoulder.

“Do they have spotters? Snipers?” He asked the young man.

“We built a perch on the truck, sometimes it’s out front.” Noah answered with uncertainty in his voice.

Glenn hid behind one of the last trees before the clearing and peered round. He could see a large brick wall iconic of a walled off estate along with a sign reading Shirewilt Estates. He turned back to the others.

“Not today.” Glenn commented.

Rick and Glenn kept their guns at the ready while Michonne held onto her katana. The five of them made their way up onto the road, keeping their bodies low in case anyone did shoot at them from the community. Crows cawed above them loudly.

They stepped onto the leaf littered road. There was no signs of any people or cars having used the road in a long time and the area was oddly silent. They walked towards the community, passing the rotting corpse of a fox and a small grandfather clock that had been abandoned on the road. They reached the large metal gates of the community which Noah instantly pushed against. The noise of the impact was loud and the distinct rattle of metal chains could be heard on the other side. Noah pressed his ear next to the gates to listen out for voices, movement or any other sign of life. The sound of a distant walker reached their ears but it was unclear where it had originated from.

“You hear that?” Noah asked, turning to them.

Glenn holstered his gun as he walked past the young man. “Just wait.”

The Asian man climbed up the wall to the side of the gate and held himself there so he could slowly look over into the community. The others watched him intently, eagerly looking for his reaction to what he saw so they would know if they had finally found sanctuary or not. Glenn stood to his full height and sighed, resting his arm on the top of the wall before looking back at the others with a defeated look on his face. He shook his head. The community was gone.

Noah desperately scrambled over the wall and landed on the other side with a heavy thud. His family had been in the community, his mother, and his two younger twin brothers. They couldn’t be gone. The only thing that had kept him alive this long was the hope that he would see them again. He had to look around. He had to know if they were dead or alive. Maybe they had left the community months ago. Maybe they were safe.

The others made their way over the wall and took in the sight of the community. Noah was rushing ahead of them, looking at the debris, the blood stains and the blackened remains of burnt out buildings.

“Noah!” Rick called. “Wait up!”

Noah ignored him as soon as he saw the charred remains of a skeleton on the front lawn. His pace increased as he rushed for the centre of the community. His home, the place he had grown up was gone. The people he had known were dead. He bounced his limp into an awkward jog.

“Noah!” Rick shouted, running after him with his revolver in his hand.

They reached the centre of the community, all the streets converged on the one roundabout in the middle. Freshly killed bodies lay in the street. Men. Women. Children. Blood, furniture, household objects and bullet casings littered the streets and gardens. Attracted by the noise, a few walkers staggered into view. At the bottom of one of the streets, the perimeter wall had been knocked down from outside. Something had come through it, breaching the sanctity of the community and dooming all the residents to a violent death. On one of the walls a message had been written with chalk.

WOLVES NOT FAR.

Noah collapsed to the ground, sobbing loudly. All his hopes and dreams, the very things that had kept him going now lay dead all around him. His family was probably dead as well. It was inevitable. He was alone. Tyreese stepped forward and placed his hands on Noah’s shoulders from behind as the boy continued to sob.

“It’s alright, you’re gonna be with us now.” Tyreese tried to comfort him.

Michonne was also visibly upset. She had been hoping the whole way that this would be their lucky break. It had turned out just the way it always did. Hopeless. A never ending nightmare. She watched as one of the walkers started getting closer as it made its way down the street.

“I’ll get him.” She told the others as she pulled out her sword and made her way towards it.

The snarls of walkers continued to sound all around them. Most of the community had turned. Most of the houses had caught fire at some point, evident by their blackened windows and doors and partially caved roofs. Rick crouched down next to Noah.

“I’m sorry, Noah.” He tried to comfort the boy. “I truly am.”

Michonne stood and watched as the walker slowly approached. She was too upset and disappointed to walk towards it so she preferred to wait for it. Rick stood back up and looked around.

“We should see if there’s anything we can use and head back.” Rick told them, formulating their next plan of action.

“Then what?” Michonne asked cynically. They were back to square one.

Rick didn’t have an answer for that. They had no destination but they had no option but to keep going. Michonne headed towards the now two walkers that were getting too close for comfort and prepared to execute them.

“We can make a quick sweep.” Glenn commented. There probably wouldn’t be much left.

“I’ll stay with him.” Tyreese told Rick, referring to the still sobbing Noah.

Rick nodded and took out his radio. He spoke into it as Michonne sliced the walkers’ heads apart.

“Carol? Do you copy?” Rick asked, unsure if the range was still good.

“We’re here.” Carol’s voice responded.

“We made it.” Rick told her and hesitated, hating to be the messenger of bad news. “It’s gone.”

Michonne killed a third walker and smashed a glass frame that lay in the road with her foot. She needed to vent. She wanted to scream in frustration. Rick tapped her arm gently. She glanced at the bearded man before bending down to remove the fabric from under the broken glass.

“Clean shirt.” She stated as she lifted it up.

“We’ll figure it out.” Rick told her.

“We will.” Michonne commented, heading for the nearest house. “There’s some garbage bags in the garage.”

Glenn seemed calm yet quiet.

“You didn’t think it would still be here?” Rick asked him.

“Did you?” Glenn asked honestly. He had never expected it to be there. Nothing good ever lasted.

“After it happened, right after with Beth in the hospital.” Rick told him. “I saw that woman, Dawn.”

Glenn looked at him, unsure about why Rick was bringing it up.

“She didn’t mean to do it. I knew. I saw it.” Rick continued. “But I wanted to kill her. I just wonder if it even mattered, one way or another. Didn’t have a thing to do with Beth.”

Glenn realised how dark Rick was becoming. He hated to admit it but he too was becoming darker the more time they spent out on the road.

“I don’t know if I thought it would still be here but Beth wanted to get him here.” Rick finally answered. “She wanted to get him home. This was for her and it could have been for us too.”

 

Carol walked down to the centre of their camp from her position up by the van. Her face was loyal to her and did not betray her at any moment. There was no way to read the woman’s thoughts and emotions just by looking at her. The rest of the group turned their heads towards her, knowing that she had news. It had been a while since Rick and the others left so it meant she had news of the community.

Carol took a breath to compose herself before speaking. “They found Noah’s community.”

Jason squeezed Carl’s hand and grinned. This was it. They didn’t have to be on the deathly depressing road anymore. They would finally have a place to go to where they could relax and be safe.

“And it’s gone. We’ll need to look somewhere else.” Carol finished.

Everyone’s heads fell. Some people, like Abraham didn’t seem to react as they had probably predicted that it would be the case. Jason, however, felt his heart sink. He had been so optimistic and so hopeful that this would be their lucky break. Just like that those hopes had been dashed and tossed into the wind.

Jason’s legs felt weak but he didn’t collapse nor did he let go of Carl’s hand. His grip did loosen which caused Carl to give it a squeeze in return. Jason looked into Carl’s eyes and saw a strange strength within them. The younger teen hadn’t expected the community to be there so the bad news hadn’t hit him as hard. This time it was his turn to comfort Jason for a while.

 

 

Tyreese stood by Noah, who sat on the road as he continued to sob. Rick, Glenn and Michonne were at the end of one of the streets searching for supplies. There was an uncomfortable silence in the remains of the community. Tyreese shook his head. He knew what Noah was going through.

“I wanted to die for what I’d lost. Who I’d lost. I stepped out into a crowd of those things, just trying to take it all out on them, until they took me. Put them all in front of me so that I didn’t see anything but I just kept going.” Tyreese explained to the sobbing teen in front of him. “Then later, I was there for Judith when she needed me. I saved her. I brought her back to her dad. That wouldn’t have happened if I had just given up, if I hadn’t chosen to live.”

He stepped closer to the teen whose sobs had calmed down slightly.

“Noah. Noah.” Tyreese got his attention before placing a hand on his shoulder. “This isn’t the end.”

Noah’s sobbing ceased slowly as he calmed himself down. The teenager looked around at the decimated community before slowly rising to his feet.

“There you go.” Tyreese commented with a nod. Noah was choosing to live.

Noah looked down the street at one of the houses. It hadn’t been set on fire and simply hung open like a rotting wound. He fixated his gaze upon the shell of the former home and started moving towards it.

“We should probably…” Tyreese started to suggest for them to join the others but stopped as Noah took off. “Noah!”

Tyreese growled Noah’s name as he ran after the lad who was now sprinting as fast as his limp would allow him. He had to get to that house. He had to look inside. He had to know. It was his home.

 

“I was thinking about that guy in the storage container back at Terminus, how I made us stop.” Glenn commented to Rick. “After the prison, on my trip, I got Maggie back, things went okay.”

Rick studied him with narrow eyes as he spoke.

“Losing Washington, losing Beth right after just finding out she’s alive.” He continued, picking up a baseball bat. “I hadn’t caught up with you yet. If it were now, I wouldn’t make us stop. We’d run right by and I would have shot that woman dead, right or wrong.”

Michonne listened in and glared at the two of them. She could see what was happening to both the men she knew were good people. They had been on the road for two weeks and it was starting to show. They were becoming savage. They were losing their humanity just like she had before she met Andrea.

“We need to stop.” She warned them, earning confused looks. “We can be out here too long.”

Rick turned his gaze away and thought about what she had said. It was true that they were fighting for survival every single day. They were soldiers in a never ending battle against the undead. It was taking its toll.

 

Noah scrambled towards the house. His house. His old home. He made it to the front garden before Tyreese finally reached him and grabbed his shoulder to stop him from going any further. The large man knew that emotion was fuelling Noah and no rational thought or caution was going into his decisions. He could get himself killed like that. Tyreese knew. Tyreese had been in that very same state before. Tyreese stood in front of Noah to block his way as they both panted heavily.

“This is my house.” Noah told him.

Tyreese looked behind him at the abandoned shell of a house. “You don’t want to go in there.”

“I do.” Noah retorted and attempted to step forward.

Tyreese placed his hand on Noah’s chest earning a glare from Noah as he hissed. “Let me see.”

Tyreese pulled out his knife and finally spoke again. “Me first.”

Noah nodded weakly. Tyreese turned and walked towards the front door of the house which had been broken off its hinges. Blood stains were splattered over the walls. Whatever had happened had been violent. Tyreese and Noah shared a glance before Tyreese banged on the wall. Silence. He banged again in an attempt to draw out any walkers. More silence. The house was abandoned.

Tyreese slowly stepped inside with Noah close behind him. The sight that immediately greeted them was not a pleasant one. In the centre of the living room lay a partially decomposed corpse. The body belonged to a woman and the cause of death was obvious even from a distance. Her head had been caved in as she lay there. The large, dark stain of a pool of blood surrounded her head after being soaked up by the rug she lay on.

Tyreese turned to Noah who was frozen on the spot. The face of the woman was turned away from them but by the size of the body the teenager already had a horrible feeling in the pit of his stomach. He slowly walked around to the other side and crouched down to examine the face. Noah felt his legs go weak as a cold shiver shot through his body. It was his mother. He carefully took a towel that lay on the floor and used it to cover her head and give her corpse some dignity. He placed a hand on her back gently as he felt tears fall from his eyes.

“I tried to get back sooner.” He whispered guiltily to the body. “I tried.”

Tyreese slowly made his way down the hallway towards the bedrooms. He could have sworn he heard something. As he turned the corner all the bedroom doors were open except for the last one at the end of the hallway. A shadow moved at the base of the door and the faint snarls of a walker could be heard from behind it. The walker had been locked in the room and was probably a relative of Noah’s. By the higher pitch of the snarls he assumed the creature on the other side of the door was a child.

Considering Noah was upset in the living room, he decided to leave the walker till later. It was sealed up inside the room and couldn’t open doors so it wasn’t a threat for the time being, especially if he stayed quiet. Tyreese turned his attention to the open door to his right and peered into the bedroom. A clothed pair of legs were on the bed. He froze in place for a moment before stepping inside. The body on the bed was missing most of its chest cavity, having had its flesh and organs eaten by a walker. It had been a young boy. Tyreese felt tears well up at the back of his eyes. The walker and the body on the bed were Noah’s little brothers. They had to be.

Tyreese turned his attention to the wall beside the bed. Numerous photos were stuck to it and upon closer inspection they confirmed his suspicions. The body beside him did indeed belong to one of Noah’s little brothers who were obviously twins, meaning the walker in the next room was the other brother. Noah had returned to this community with hope and all that was left for him was heartbreak. Tyreese felt like crying out of sympathy for what Noah was going through. First his father, then Beth, now the rest of his family and community.

A sudden loud snarl brought him out of his thoughts and he turned to the source of it in time to watch as the walker from the other room bit into his arm causing blood to spurt out over its face and onto the carpet. Tyreese roared in pain and fear as it pulled a chunk of flesh from his arm. The large man quickly kicked the walker back and stumbled back against the table, the sudden shock making his legs weak. The young walker began to advance towards him again, hungry for more of his flesh as he collapsed to the floor as blood continued to pour from his arm. The walker snarled loudly as it stepped towards him.

Noah rushed into the room and grabbed one of the toy airplanes that hung from the ceiling. He pulled it off the string holding it in the air and jammed it into his little brother’s eye socket until it reached the brain. The walker collapsed back on the floor with a thud. Noah dropped the toy plane and rushed over to Tyreese who was sat on the floor, his trousers soaked with the blood from his arm.

“You’ll be okay! Just hold on and I’ll get someone!” Noah told him hurriedly. “I’ll get them, I’ll get them!”

With that said Noah rushed out of the bedroom so he could alert Rick, Glenn and Michonne to what had just happened. They would know what to do in this situation. He hoped.

 

Jason and Carl sat together on the log like they had before with Judith. The baby was in the van sleeping and was being guarded with motherly attention and vigilance from Tara. Carl noted that since the announcement that the community was lost, Jason had been unusually silent. He just sat there staring at the ground. Carl wouldn’t tolerate another minute of the silence between them so he took one of Jason’s gloved hands in his own hand and squeezed gently.

“Jason, what’s wrong?” Carl asked him. The news of the community couldn’t have upset him so much.

“This world, Carl.” Jason answered with a hesitant sigh. “This world is fucked.”

Carl remained silent. He didn’t know how to answer that statement. It was true, the world was a nightmare that they lived in each day. The only positivity in such a bleak existence was the people they had around them and the love that he and Jason shared. Carl struggled to find a response because to accept the truth of the statement would concede the point and to deny it would be dishonest.

“I hoped that this would be our lucky break.” Jason spoke as a result of Carl’s silence. “We needed this. I needed this.”

“Nothing lasts in this world anymore.” Carl answered solemnly. “It shouldn’t be a surprise.”

“But we need somewhere that will last because if we don’t then we won’t last either.” Jason retorted desperately, holding his forehead in his free hand.

Yet again Carl failed to find an adequate response. This statement was also true and it was something he tried not to think about too much. They were running low on supplies and motivation. He didn’t want to imagine how things would be if they continued as they were.

“I wanted this place to still be standing for you. Hell, I even prayed for it and I’m not religious.” Jason continued. “All of it for you. A place where you could be safe and happy and normal. A place where Judith could grow up.”

Carl wasn’t sure how to answer. His heart swelled at the consideration. “Jason…”

“I promised Kellin I would find such a place for us. I didn’t and then I lost him.” Jason explained, his voice shaking as his eyes stung. “I refuse to let the same thing happen to you. I swear I’ll find a place and get you there even if I have to die for it.”

Jason’s head shot up from its fixation on the ground at the feeling of Carl’s arms being wrapped tightly around him. Carl had hopped off the log so he could embrace the older teen in a tight hug. Jason’s own arms wrapped around Carl’s slim body and pulled him closer.

“You’re not going to lose me.” Carl’s spoke into his ear. “And you’re not going to die for it. I won’t let you.”

Jason simply nodded as he felt a tear escape from one of his eyes. He didn’t have the heart to be pragmatic and realistic with Carl. He knew that eventually one of them would die because that’s what happened in this hellish world. He didn’t want Carl’s life to be cut short so if he had to die to protect Carl then he would make sure his life was given for that cause.

“I love you.” Jason said softly into Carl’s ear.

“I love you too.” Carl answered just as softly into Jason’s ear.

The two of them tightened their embrace and remained in that position. They were comfortable and they needed the comfort of each other. They didn’t know how long they would need the comfort and it didn’t matter. They would embrace for as long as they could and anyone who didn’t approve, like Gabriel, could get torn apart by walkers for all they cared.

 

 

Tyreese sat where he was, clutching his arm in a desperate attempt to stop some of the bleeding even though he knew it was pointless. He panted from pain and panic. A sound caught his attention from his left side. The radio on the small table appeared to have turned itself on somehow as a British news presenter’s voice sounded from the speakers.

“Nearly sixty-eight citizens of the Republic have been killed in four major attacks along the main coastal district. The group has continued their campaign of random violence moving across the countryside unfettered with the Republic’s military forces in disarray.”

Tyreese’s hand shook as he lifted it off the bite on his arm. Just as he had assumed his hand was doing nothing to stop the river of blood flowing out of the injury. The radio had fallen silent again as sweat rolled down his face after the front of his beanie had been saturated. He placed his hand on the bite again and held it as tightly as he could. He wanted to move and head outside to the others but his legs felt like jelly.

“I tried to tell you.” A voice came from in front of him.

Tyreese looked up to see Martin, the man from Terminus who had threatened Judith, sitting with his back against the wall just as he had done in the shed that day. His cap was missing and large gory wounds ran down his forehead and face from where Jason had hacked into him with a machete.

“I tried to tell you, man. That it was gonna be you.” Martin told him, still chewing his gum. “You’re the kinda guy who saves babies.”

Tyreese tried to shift himself from under the table to get closer to Martin. He knew he was hallucinating. Martin was dead. It felt so real.

“You think Gareth would have followed you guys if you had put a bullet in my brain?” Martin asked. “Cut me up like Jason did?”

Tyreese tried to get closer. If he could touch Martin the hallucination might fade away so he could be left alone. He struggled to move.

“Whoa, don’t get up.” Martin told him with an outstretched hand. “If I hadn’t told them that you were there, maybe Gareth wouldn’t have gone after you.”

Tyreese panted as Martin continued talking to him. He didn’t want to hear any of it but he couldn’t stop listening.

“Maybe they wouldn’t be dead. Maybe Bob wouldn’t be dead.” Martin kept talking. “Maybe him being alive, maybe something about that would have changed things with Beth, dominos shit.”

Tyreese glared at him as Martin chuckled sadistically.

“Maybe not.” Martin commented with a shrug. “Maybe you wouldn’t be bit right now.”

“Man, that’s bullshit.” Bob’s voice sounded from the bed where he sat. “I got bit at the food bank, it went the way it had to, the way it was always going to. Just like this.”

The radio crackled before the news presenter’s voice returned. Tyreese listened to it as he stared at Bob, who sat with his blooded shoulder and missing leg.

“Terrorising the village by night, carrying out revenge attacks involving hacking innocents with machetes and in some cases, setting them on fire.”

“If you just did it.” Martin resumed his lecture, gaining Tyreese’s attention. “If you didn’t lie like a bitch, it might have changed things. Maybe the bill would have been paid.”

“The bill has to be paid.” A frighteningly deep and familiar voice sounded from the doorway.

Tyreese looked across the room at the source of the voice. Standing with a bullet hole in his head and a stab wound in his chest, blood staining his shirt and leather jacket, was the Governor.

“You have to earn your keep. You told me you’d do whatever you had to do to earn your keep.” The Governor told him. “That’s what you said, remember that?”

Tyreese stared at him in horror as the snarls of walkers came through the crackling radio’s speakers. He turned to his left at a much softer, younger voice.

“It’s better now, Tyreese.” Lizzie told him, the bullet wound in her head where Carol had shot her.

“It is.” Her younger sister, Mika, with her blooded stomach reassured him. “It’s better now.”

“It’s not better now.” The Governor declared forcefully as he walked towards Tyreese. “You know damn well…”

Suddenly the Governor disappeared and in his place was the disgusting, rotting face of a walker that was quickly closing in on Tyreese. He pushed the computer chair in the way of the walker as he scrambled to his feet, only able to do so thanks to the adrenaline rushing through his veins. The walker stumbled forward over the chair and grabbed at Tyreese’s chest, forcing him against the wall as he struggled to get his hammer out. The walker snapped its teeth together repeatedly as it tried to close the gap between them and bite into him. The force of the struggle between them coupled with Tyreese’s blood loss caused him to drop the hammer to the floor.

Tyreese was panicking, his head was pounding with adrenaline and his arm was bleeding even worse because of it. He refused to die. He refused to let himself be killed by the shambling, snarling corpse in front of him. Tyreese pushed the walker back and onto the bed, giving himself space to rush to the other side of the room. The walker closed the gap between them and pinned Tyreese against the set of shelves that stood against the other wall, the items on it clattering as he made contact with it. The walker continued to snarl in his face as it kept trying to bite him in vain.

He needed two hands to hold the walker at bay. His blood loss had made him weaker than usual and he was struggling with the corpse. Tyreese knew he could kill it with one of the items on the shelf but he couldn’t let go or it would bite him. Suddenly he came up with a solution. He had already been bitten once so his chances of survival were limited at this point. Tyreese held his arm up and allowed the walker to bite into it. He roared in pain as the rotting teeth sank into his flesh as he reached for a decorative rock that sat on the shelf. Tyreese grabbed the rock and smacked the walker in the head with it, forcing it to let go and stumble back. It wasn’t dead yet. As it turned back towards him he summoned all of his remaining strength and smacked it a second time. The walker’s skull caved in and it dropped onto the computer chair as Tyreese fell flat on the floor.

He grasped his arm that had now been bitten twice and whimpered in pain as he crawled back under the table. His strength had been totally zapped and he had no sense of time. Noah had left to get help but where was he? Why weren’t Rick and the others there? If they cut his arm off he could still live. He knew it could be done. Where were they? The blood continued to pour from his arm.

 

Jason and Carl had ended their embrace and now sat together on the log with Carl leaning into Jason. The older teen rubbed Carl’s back as they listened to the birds chirping in the trees above them. It was always a pleasure to hear the sounds of nature as a reminder that the non-human part of the world was thriving and continuing on as it always had and always would.

Jason wondered if the world could ever return to some kind of normality. It seemed unlikely but the walkers were rotting corpses. They were slowly decomposing so it stood to reason that eventually they would fall apart and cease to function. It could take years for it to happen but the knowledge of biology that he had told him the walkers couldn’t live forever. If they could find a place where they could live for years, perhaps even a decade then maybe the world would be a lot safer. It was something that was worth fighting for. There was no point fighting if there wasn’t anything to fight for.

He could sense from Carl’s silence that he was both worried about the others and also bored. Carl was young and sitting around in a car or on a fallen tree wasn’t the most stimulating of experiences especially after two weeks of it. Jason remembered that Carl had mentioned his desire to learn how to use a crossbow and Daryl’s promise to teach him. It was as good a time as any to start.

Jason stood up and pulled Carl to his feet as well, earning him a curious look from the younger teen.

“Let’s go find Daryl.” Jason told him with a smile. “It’s about time you started your crossbow training.”

Carl smiled both at the opportunity and also at the fact that Jason had remembered it at all. He still wasn’t used to having someone be so attentive towards him and as much as he enjoyed it he felt he didn’t repay it enough.

Jason and Carl walked hand in hand in search of the group’s archer and tracker. They eventually found Daryl a small distance away from the main group as he sat against a tree and skinned a rabbit he had killed. It was a messy job but food was food.

“Hey, Daryl.” Jason greeted as pleasantly as he could. “I was wondering if you could do us a favour.”

“What’s that?” Daryl asked, not looking up from the rabbit corpse as he continued preparing it.

“Carl mentioned before that he wanted to learn how to fire a crossbow.” Jason told him.

Daryl looked up at him with more of a glare than anything else. He reached over for his crossbow and lightly tossed it at their feet. Jason sighed at this act of passive defiance. He knew fine well that Daryl wasn’t an idiot and this was his way of politely saying no.

“I meant that he wants to be taught.” Jason added and held out the crossbow to Daryl.

“Then teach him.” Daryl answered indignantly.

“Daryl. Stop trying to avoid this by pretending to not understand.” Jason growled impatiently.

Daryl grinded his teeth before standing up to stare Jason down, glaring directly into his eyes. “Then get out my face and take no for an answer.”

Jason glared right back, unfazed by the aggression Daryl was showing him.

“Jason, we can do it another time.” Carl tried to placate the situation.

Jason wasn’t taking no for an answer. “You’re not the only one who lost someone back in Atlanta. I know what you’re going through.”

“You don’t know nothing.” Daryl hissed back.

After losing everyone, or so he had thought at the time, Beth had brought light back into the darkness of Daryl’s world. Her innocence had a heart-warming and intoxicating effect on him and he had failed to save her twice. He hadn’t stopped her kidnappers and he failed to stop Dawn from killing her. Before she died, Daryl taught her how to track and use the bow and now Jason was demanding the same thing for Carl. It just brought all the memories back and he acted as if he knew what Daryl was feeling.

“I know you made a promise.” Jason stood his ground and shoved the crossbow against Daryl’s chest. “Honour it.”

Daryl held the crossbow and glared at Jason. His eyes then drifted over to Carl who was looking both anxious and expectantly. Carl was one tough kid and took after his father in many ways. At the prison he had asked Daryl to teach him and the archer had sincerely promised to do so but the Governor attacked on the very same day. He didn’t owe Jason anything, in fact it was the other way around after Terminus. Daryl did, however, have a promise to keep to Carl. His aggression slowly faded and he rested the crossbow against his shoulder.

“Come on.” He told Carl and beckoned the boy to follow him.

Jason watched as Carl followed the archer, a grin plastered on his face. It brought a great sense of joy to Jason to be doing things that made Carl happy. He followed them in grateful silence.

 

 

Michonne, Rick and Glenn regrouped from their respective house searches with bin bags in their hands. Michonne looked around as the inspiration for an idea struck her.

“We could put some of the garage doors together against the break.” She told them. “Park a car against them until we brick it back up. It can work.”

“This place is surrounded by a forest. There’s no sightlines.” Rick commented. “Whoever or whatever could be on top of us without us even knowing it. That’s probably what happened.”

“It’s what happened to us.” Glenn commented, referring to the prison which also had woodland all around it.

Michonne sighed in exasperation as Rick and Glenn stopped walking.

“We can start taking down the trees.” She pressed. “We use them to build the walls up.”

Rick was not convinced.

“Look!” Michonne continued to push her point and lead them over to the broken wall.

Once they reached the breach in the perimeter it was clear what had happened. Bricks and fencing was strewn all over the road where some kind of vehicle had obviously rammed into it, evident by the tire tracks in the grass outside. Michonne froze in her tracks when they discovered what also lay on the grass. Dozens of bodies lay on the grass and all of them had the same thing in common, they had been cut in half at the waist. The upper halves of all the bodies were missing which left only the legs and hips of each body on the grass. The grass itself was stained crimson with dried blood.

Something horrendously sinister had taken place at the community. It hadn’t been attacked by regular bandits like the claimer group nor cannibals like that of Terminus. It hadn’t been attacked by someone as clinical as the Governor either. The community had been slaughtered by a band of savage lunatics. A band of savage lunatics who had probably been out on the road for far too long. Michonne knew that their own group wasn’t really that far behind and it terrified her.

“It doesn’t matter.” Glenn commented to break the silence.

“What?” Rick asked, not following the Asian man’s thoughts.

“You said you wondered if it even mattered if you killed her or not.” Glenn explained, referring to Dawn. “It doesn’t matter if you had done it, or if I had but Daryl did. It doesn’t matter.”

Michonne knew the community was lost. The walls had all been severely damaged in the break in and were beyond any kind of quick repair. Rick was right about the trees being a huge disadvantage and potential danger as they could hide the kind of barbaric lunatics who had destroyed the community and mutilated the corpses. There had to be somewhere else they could go. They couldn’t stay on the road for much longer.

“Washington.” Michonne stated. “Eugene lied about a cure but he thought Washington for a reason.”

“But he was lying.” Glenn retorted. The disappointment was still heavy on his heart.

“About the cure but he did the math and realised that Washington would be the best place with a chance.” Michonne argued. “We’re close. What if there are people there? What if it’s someplace where we can be safe?”

Rick and Glenn were unsure. They both had arrived at the conclusion that any kind of sanctuary was probably a pipedream.

“We’re a hundred miles away. It’s a possibility.” Michonne continued to argue in an attempt to convince them. “It’s a chance instead of just being out here. Instead of just making it because right now, this is what making it looks like!”

Michonne gestured to the mutilated corpses. The apocalyptic world could drive anyone insane with enough time and pressure. Rick stared at her but didn’t speak.

“Don’t you want one more day with a chance?” Michonne asked him.

The snarls of approaching walkers alerted them to the incoming danger, interrupting the conversation.

“We should go.” Rick told them gruffly.

Michonne sighed and turned away. She was done trying to speak to the human equivalent of a brick wall. Glenn followed Rick’s command and began walking towards the community again.

“It’s a hundred miles away.” Rick continued.

Michonne and Glenn both turned back round to the bearded leader in surprise.

“We should go to Washington.” Rick confirmed.

Michonne smiled. He had been listening and he agreed with her. They finally had a new and promising destination again. Before they could say anything else Noah’s screams echoed through the streets. Rick unholstered his revolver, Michonne placed her hand on the handle of her sword and Glenn tightened his grip on the baseball bat as they all took off running towards the source of the screams.

 

They eventually found Noah on the porch of one of the houses. He was pinned down behind a block of wooden fencing by two walkers that were desperately trying to get to him. A couple other walkers had already approached at the sound of his screams.

“Noah, hold on!” Glenn shouted, gaining the attention of one of the walkers.

Glenn swung his baseball bat at the walker as it snarled at him, smacking its head against the wall of the house before quickly thrusting his knife into its cranium to finish it off.

“I got him!” Michonne called to the others, rushing for one of the approaching walkers.

She rushed up to the walker and swung her sword only for it to bounce off the walker. That’s when she noticed that the walker had a metal pipe sticking out of its neck that had stopped the sword swing in its tracks. The walker tried to grab her forcing the samurai to grab its shoulders to hold it back from biting her.

Rick quickly stabbed the other walker that had Noah pinned down in the back of the head with his machete, pushing the body so that it fell to the side and gave Noah space to move and get back on his feet.

“You okay?” He asked gruffly, checking Noah over for any bites or traces of blood, of which there was none.

Michonne continued to struggle with the dead weight of the walker pushing against her as it tried to bite her. Her arms and legs burned from the exertion of the struggle. She managed to gain some footing and pushed the walker back towards Rick. The bearded man grabbed the walker by the back of its collar and pulled it towards him. He then ripped the metal pipe out of its neck and used it to quickly split its head into two halves. He dropped the pipe and attempted to catch his breath.

“Tyreese!” Noah exclaimed to them.

“Where?!” Rick answered, knowing it was bad news.

“My house, he’s been bit!” Noah explained and rushed in the direction of his house with the others close behind.

 

Carl took aim with the crossbow. His experience wielding different guns, especially the rifles back at the prison helped his control of the weapon as it was bigger than his Beretta. Daryl had taught him the basics and with Jason’s help had killed a walker and tied it to a tree for target practice. He pulled the trigger and the bolt shot through the air and struck the corpse in the neck.

“Reload and aim higher.” Daryl told him. “Bolts ain’t like bullets.”

Carl lowered the crossbow and withdrew another bolt. He placed it in the bow and tried to pull the bowstring back. Even with both his hands on the bowstring he struggled to pull it up because of the weight of the mechanism. Jason stepped up behind Carl and placed his own hands next to Carl’s and together they pulled the bowstring up and prepped the weapon.

Carl took aim yet again and this time aimed a little touch higher as Daryl instructed. He fired the crossbow and the arrow flew right into the corpse’s forehead. Had the walker still been alive it would have been a fatal headshot. Carl smiled with pride and Jason gave him a short applause.

As Daryl removed the two bolts from the walker and helped Carl to reload so he could continue practicing, Carol approached the trio. The older woman stood next to Jason and watched as Daryl taught Carl various tips and tricks.

“Daryl’s taking it hard.” Carol commented, referring to Beth’s death.

“We just need to help him through it.” Jason answered with folded arms. “That’s why I got him to do this.”

Carol turned her head to study Jason’s face. Jason looked back and regretted it instantly when Carol’s gaze fixated on his eyes as if she was staring into his soul. Jason hated when people could read him, he preferred to be a bit more mysterious.

“That’s not the only reason, is it?” Carol asked almost rhetorically.

Jason sighed. It was pointless to even attempt to lie.

“Kellin, my previous boyfriend wasn’t very combat inclined.” Jason explained, anguish staining his voice. “He hated violence and one day he got bit.”

“And you’re worried the same will happen to Carl?” Carol questioned, intrigued by how open Jason was being.

Jason nodded. “I want him to be a survival machine so that he stays alive.”

“We’ll all die eventually.” Carol told him, opting to be realistic.

“Yeah, but I want to be ready for it.” Jason answered. He wanted to expect death and welcome it instead of running in fear of it.

“You can never be.” Carol responded morbidly and walked away to check on the others.

 

 

The radio continued to crackle with white noise with the odd voice of a presenter before it fell silent. The pleasant sound of a guitar filled the room as Beth played the guitar and sang.

“Everyman has a right to live, love is all that we have to give. Together we struggle by your will to survive then together we fight just to stay alive.” She sang pleasantly, despite the bullet hole in her head. “Struggling man has got to move, struggling man no time to lose. I’m a struggling man and I’ve got to move on.”

Tyreese gasped in pain as the bites on his arm continued to pour blood that then dripped all over his leg and the carpet, soaking both of them. He looked round to Beth who sat on a stool as she played the guitar with Lizzie and Mika at her feet. She stopped playing and looked back at Tyreese.

“It’s okay, Tyreese, you gotta know that now.” Beth told him.

Tyreese’s gaze turned back round to Bob who sat on the bed opposite him, still smiling like he always did.

“It’s okay that you didn’t want to be a part of it anymore, Ty.” Bob told him calmly.

“You don’t have to be a part of it.” Lizzie added.

Martin, however, laughed and shook his head. “See, that’s your problem right there.”

“What’s my problem?” Tyreese hissed back.

“You didn’t want to be part of it but being part of it is being now.” Martin explained. “That’s what it is. Open your eyes.”

Tyreese was struggling with the opposing viewpoints. He could be a part of the apocalyptic world and do things like take care of Judith, he didn’t have to become a savage with no morals. Yet as each week went by it became clearer that the only way to survive was to become a beast to some extent. Tyreese was too gentle a man to let that happen. However, if he lived through the bites on his arm, he would have to allow himself some form of decline into violence and barbarism if he wanted to live.

“You don’t have to, not if you don’t want to.” Lizzie countered, causing Tyreese to look back at her.

“You don’t. It’s better now.” Mika added to back up Lizzie’s comment.

The Governor strolled back into the room and crouched down so he could look Tyreese in the eyes.

“You told me that you’d earn your keep. You had no idea what you were talking about, did you? Did you?!” He chastised him. “Your eyes were open but you didn’t want to see, even though I made you see it. I showed you.”

Tyreese hated the man in front of him with every fibre of his being. The man that had killed so many people, the man who had destroyed the prison and killed Hershel in such a savage way. How dare a man like him even attempt to give Tyreese any sort of lecture. Tyreese attempted to make his way out from under the table so he could confront the Governor.

“But did you adapt? Did you change? No.” The Governor continued, shaking his head. “And you would sit there in front of a woman who killed someone you loved and you would forgive her.”

Tyreese looked back at Bob as the Governor stood back up to his full height.

“That’s all there is.” Bob commented as Tyreese attempted to stand.

“This is all there is.” The Governor declared strongly. “This is it.”

The table shook as Tyreese used it for purchase as he got back on his feet. Adrenaline was surging through him again, this time as a result of the pure hatred he felt for the Governor. He glared right into the Governor’s one good eye.

“I didn’t know who I was talking to. I said I would do what I had to to earn my keep.” Tyreese answered. “But I didn’t know you. But I know, I know who I am. I know what happened and what’s going on. I know.”

The Governor glared back at him with a look of disappointed amusement on his face.

“You didn’t show me shit! You, you dead! Everything that you were is dead!” Tyreese declared, pointing at him with his blooded hands. “And it’s not over! I forgave her because it’s not over!”

Tyreese began to cry as he repeated that it wasn’t over. He lowered his head with each sob before bringing his face and hand back up to challenge the Governor once again. He growled at himself to stop crying so he could vent more anger upon the Governor.

“I didn’t turn away! I kept listening to the news so I could do what I could to help!” Tyreese shouted at the psychopath. “I’m not giving up! You hear me? I’m not giving up!”

Tyreese stumbled back and grabbed a hold of the table for support. He was still losing blood and as a result was losing strength.

“People like me, they can’t live.” Tyreese continued, holding onto his arm again. “Ain’t nobody got to die today!”

Tyreese felt his energy being zapped rapidly from him, his focus was fading and his legs were quivering under the weight of his body. The Governor walked up to him and pushed him so that he fell against the wall and slid down it.

“You have to pay the bill!” The Governor demanded before fading away. Tyreese had won.

His eyes felt heavy and his whole body refused to move. He could no longer hold onto his bleeding arm as he was too weak to even move his good arm. Tyreese watched through a haze as Lizzie and Mika lifted his bitten arm to examine the bite, smiling back at him in an act of comfort. It would all be okay.

Lizzie and Mika suddenly vanished as Tyreese was forced out of his hallucination by Rick pulling strongly on his arm and shouting at Michonne. Once the arm was held steady Michonne brought her sword down quickly and sliced off Tyreese’s arm at the elbow in an effort to stop the infection from spreading. Blood spurted out of the wound violently as Tyreese faded in and out of consciousness as a result of shock and blood loss. They quickly covered his arm with a sheet before Rick, Glenn and Noah worked together to lift Tyreese out of the house. They struggled with his size and weight while Michonne lead them and dealt with any lurking walkers.

They made it out of the house relatively swiftly as Michonne cleared the way by decapitating three roaming walkers. The men grunted and roared under the strain, effort and stress of trying to get Tyreese’s large body down the street towards the gates. Panic was rushing through all of them. The amputated arm was bleeding profusely and they had a two mile walk to the people carrier. There was every chance that Tyreese would die on the way there but they had to try.

Rick was determined to get Tyreese to safety and save his life. This was the man who had saved and taken care of Judith after the battle at the prison. This man was a hero to Rick. Rick knew that he owed it to Tyreese and he was determined to pay him back by saving his life and getting him back to camp. He did it not as a leader, nor as a father but as a friend.

“We’ve got to break the chain!” Rick barked at the others.

They reached the chained up gate, a medium sized group of walkers on the other side snarling aggressively. Glenn rushed forward and started smashing his baseball against the chain and padlock in the hopes that the rust on the metal would help him break it open faster. Time was something they did not have. Every second was important. Every second could mean the difference between life and death for Tyreese.

“Can you hold him up?” Rick asked Noah, noticing the lock was about to break with one more brutal strike from Glenn.

“Yeah!” Noah answered and held onto Tyreese awkwardly. He hadn’t expected how heavy the man actually was.

Rick rushed forward to join Glenn and Michonne so they could take out the group of walkers as fast as possible. There was no need to be quiet. There was no time. Rick took out his Colt Python and started shooting the incoming walkers. Glenn pummelled them with his baseball bat while Michonne sliced through them with her katana. During the commotion Tyreese fell to the ground as Noah was unable to keep him upright, blood still pouring from his arm.

With all of the walkers killed, Rick and Glenn rushed back to Tyreese and helped Noah lift him off the ground. They placed the sheet back on the amputated arm and resumed their struggle to carry him hurriedly back to the people carrier. They had a two mile gauntlet of trees and walkers to navigate.

“Stay with me!” Rick shouted to Tyreese as they ran into the woods. “Stay with us!”

They made it into the woods and reached the wire barricade that was tied between the trees. Rick instantly cursed the people who put it there as it made things far more difficult when trying to navigate Tyreese’s large body through the gaps. Michonne and Noah held the wires far enough apart for Glenn and Rick to push Tyreese through.

As they pulled him through their balance gave way and Tyreese was dropped to the ground. His eyes were blinking heavily and his breathing was laboured. His face was pale and soaked with sweat.

“You’ve got to hold on, man!” Rick barked at Tyreese. “Hold on!”

They all roared with effort as they lifted him up so all of them could carry him through the woods. Time was running out to save him and none of them were prepared to let him die. Rick would not let his daughter’s saviour die. He had been unable to save Hershel. He had been unable to save Beth. He was able to save Tyreese. They just had to get him to the people carrier. Ten miles was nothing with clear roads, they could make it back to the group in less than ten minutes. They could save him.

When they finally reached the people carrier they quickly worked together to get Tyreese into the backseat before rushing into the vehicle themselves. Rick grabbed his radio quickly to inform the others about what was going on.

“Carol, Tyreese has been bit, we need to cauterize the arm, rapid!” He told her before jumping in the driver’s seat. “Get Sasha and Carl away, they don’t need to see this.”

Rick started the engine and slammed his foot on the accelerator. The back tires spun in the leaves and mud. Rick cursed at the timing of their bad luck. They didn’t need things to go wrong. They needed to get back to the others. They could still make it.

The car suddenly lurched forward and slammed against the corner of the abandoned canvas truck in front of it. The impact jolted the contents of the truck onto the hood of the people carrier. The upper halves of several live walkers snarled at them through the glass, clawing at the paintwork and trying to bite through the window. They all had the letter W carved into their heads. The people who had attacked the community had cut the walkers in two and were transporting them somewhere.

There was no time to think about any of it. Rick slammed his foot on the pedal again and burst through the woodland and out onto the main road. As soon as the car was on the road he kept his foot flat on the accelerator so they would get back as fast as possible. The road was almost completely straight which allowed him to push the people carrier to its top speed. Fuel didn’t matter. All that mattered was saving Tyreese.

 

Upon receiving the news Carol quickly rushed to the centre of the group. She had to be tactical about it so that Carl and Sasha weren’t involved. They had to be prepared for when they arrived with Tyreese as he would have lost a lot of blood by the time of their arrival. Speed and efficiency was key.

“Sasha, take Judith over to Carl and Jason.” She commanded. “Rosita, get some bandages ready.”

“What’s going on?” Maggie asked, worried for Glenn’s safety.

“Tyreese has been bitten on the arm.” Carol explained, much to Sasha’s horror. “They’ve removed his arm but they need us to be ready to cauterize the wound.”

“Are the rest of them okay?” Maggie asked quickly. “Is Glenn okay?”

“They’re fine, it’s just Tyreese.” Carol answered, putting her hands up defensively. “Get a fire started. Quickly.”

Without another word, Maggie started building a fire while Rosita prepared some bandages along with one of their cooking pots. The base of it would be used to cauterize Tyreese’s amputated arm. It was both a race against time and a waiting game.

“I can go and meet them half way!” Sasha suggested, still with Judith in her arms.

“No, they won’t expect you and we don’t need any accidents.” Carol countered. “Take Judith and stay with Carl, Jason and Daryl.”

Sasha bit her lip as her heart caught in her throat. Her brother had been bitten and was bleeding out and there was nothing she could do. She had already lost Bob, losing Tyreese would be too much for her to bare. With an exasperated sigh of defeat and acceptance, she headed over to the tree line where Jason, Carl and Daryl were and waited for Tyreese to return. She shook with fear as she walked. This world couldn’t be cruel enough to take her brother too, could it?

 

 

The radio’s news presenter returned to continue his report, his voice flowing from the car radio so that Tyreese could listen closely to the horrors that were happening in the world.

“There have been troubling reports of cannibalism having broken out in refugee camps along the Republic’s transportation corridor and despite the string of victories by rebel forces there are disturbing reports of them increasing the brutality of their attacks, including the wholesale destruction of villages, the burning down of local prisons, the targeting of innocent civilians and even the widespread mutilation of children and this appears to be only the beginning of their campaign which seems to be an endless war against…”

“Turn that off.” Tyreese told them. He didn’t want to listen to it anymore. He couldn’t.

Bob, fully healed, turned round to him from the front seat. “You sure?”

Tyreese turned his gaze to the driver’s seat, where a fully healed Beth sat at the wheel and turned to him.

“It’s okay, Tyreese. You gotta know that now.” She told him calmly.

He turned his head even further to the left to see that Mika and Lizzie were sitting beside him. They too, were fully healed from their injuries.

“It isn’t just okay.” Lizzie told him.

“It’s better now.” Mika assured him and finished Lizzie’s sentence.

Tyreese looked round at them all. They were all smiling in a friendly, comforting way. He was amongst friends. They had been through it all and they were telling him it was okay. It was okay to let go of a world he no longer felt he was a part of. It was okay to stop fighting a battle he didn’t want to fight. He turned his head and gazed out the window to watch the world go by. It was okay. It was all okay.

After checking his pulse, Noah who had been sitting beside him realised what had happened. He called to the others. Rick stopped the people carrier, the wheels skidding along the road from the speed he had been going at. They got out the car and Rick and Glenn lifted Tyreese onto the road, lying him down on his back.

Rick looked down at the relaxed expression on Tyreese’s face. His eyes closed. Rick placed his fingers against Tyreese’s neck and didn’t feel anything. Noah was right. Tyreese was dead. Rick had failed to save the man who had succeeded in saving his daughter. He could have saved him. He should have saved him. He didn’t save him. His friend, his hero now lay dead on the street. He stood up and walked a few feet away from Tyreese’s body, anger and grief rushing through him.

Michonne with tears in her eyes unsheathed her katana and made sure that Tyreese wouldn’t become a walker. After a few minutes of crying they worked together to place their friend’s body in the back of the people carrier so they could return to the group.

 

The metal pot sizzled under the heat from the fire as the group awaited their return. The faint sound of an engine could be heard in the distance that slowly but surely got louder and louder. Eventually the people carrier burst round the corner on the road and continued to speed towards them before it skidded to a halt. They had returned and it was time to cauterize the wound before it was too late. Carol, Rosita and Maggie stood at the ready.

Rick was the first to step out of the people carrier. He wasn’t in a rush. He wasn’t moving fast at all. The bearded man stepped out slowly with a solemn look on his face. Glenn and Michonne also stepped out shortly followed by Noah. All of them had the same tragic expression on their faces with eyes red from crying. No one knew what to say but everyone knew what had happened.

“Where’s Tyreese?” Sasha called from the back of the camp, rushing towards them. “Where is he?!”

“Sasha…I’m sorry.” Rick told her. He didn’t know what else to say.

Sasha stared at him with widened eyes as her whole body shook. She shook her head slowly before her knees buckled and she dropped to the ground in tears. The world had now claimed her brother as well. She felt so alone and broken. Tyreese had always been there for her ever since they were kids. They had never been apart. Now they always would be.

Rick glanced across the road at an open field with some unique, flowering trees. The long green leaves blew in the breeze peacefully along with the long blades of grass that surrounded the base of the trees.

“We’ll bury him over there so everyone can say goodbye.” Rick told them.

The group nodded. No one could find the appropriate words to speak. Rick walked away from them and returned to the people carrier. He closed the door behind him as he got in and started the engine again. Slowly and carefully, Rick drove across the road and into the field. Once he was there, Abraham and Daryl joined him to help dig the grave and move the body.

To the two men’s surprise, Rick refused their help with the grave. Tyreese had saved his daughter but he had failed to save Tyreese. It was Rick’s responsibility to dig the grave as punishment for his failure. The two men understood and silently waited for their leader to dig a deep enough grave.

 

By the time the grave had been dug the whole group stood before it. Once Tyreese’s body was in the grave they covered him with a simple white sheet. From there they poured a few shovelfuls of earth on top of him before properly conducting the funeral. It was agreed that each person would honour him by dropping their own shovelful of earth into the grave.

Rick stared down into the grave and thought about Tyreese. During the chaos of the Governor’s attack on the prison, Tyreese had managed to save Judith and had taken care of her long enough for them to be reunited. If it wasn’t for his heroics, Rick would have lost his daughter that day. Tyreese had been morally grounded and in Rick’s heart would always be a hero.

_Fifteen minutes later they walked over the hill of the road as a small log cabin came into view. Closing the door, with a baby in his arms, was Sasha’s brother, Tyreese. The baby in his arms was instantly recognisable as Judith. Rick dropped his guns on the ground and ran as fast as he could towards Tyreese and the baby. His baby daughter, who he had believed to be dead since the attack on the prison was alive in front of him. Everyone smiled as Carl rushed after his dad towards his little sister._

_Rick took Judith from Tyreese’s arms and held the baby close to his chest, kissing her little forehead as tears welled up in his eyes. His daughter was alive. Sasha ran into Tyreese’s embrace, realising that Bob’s previous optimism had been well placed. Her older brother was very much alive._

_“Judith…” Carl gasped with relief as he stroked his baby sister’s head._

_Rick kissed her forehead again as they both caressed the baby. After all their heartbreak some glimmer of hope had been restored in the darkness of their apocalyptic nightmare. Judith was alive and had been returned to them in perfect health. Both of them couldn’t help but cry as they held the baby._

_Everyone looked on with smiles of joy and relief. Michonne was grateful that Carl could be allowed this moment of pure happiness so soon after the loss of Jason. It took the boy’s mind off it for now._

_Rick placed a hand on Tyreese’s shoulder and thanked him repeatedly. A man he had believed to be dead had saved his daughter’s life and had kept her safe until now. It was the noblest thing anyone had ever done for him and it would never be forgotten._

Sasha shook where she stood as she looked into her brother’s grave. He had always looked after her. Her whole life had been spent with Tyreese making sure she was okay and now she was on her own. Tyreese was gone and would no longer be there to help her through her darkest hours nor celebrate her brightest moments. It all felt surreal, like some strangely life-like nightmare that she would soon wake up from. Unfortunately, this was one nightmare she would never wake up from.

_“So what is it? The good that comes out of this bad?” Sasha asked him, both referencing their game and asking him sincerely._

_Bob didn’t answer. His eyes remained closed and his smile slowly faded from his face. His chest stopped moving. He was finally gone._

_“Bob?” Sasha called, her lip quivering and voice shaking._

_She placed a hand on his chest but felt no movements or beats from his heart. “Bob?”_

_She removed her hand from him and placed both her hands together, resting her forehead against them as she cried. It was over. Unfortunately it wasn’t over as there was still one last thing that needed to be done. She had to prevent his reanimation. She pulled out her knife but realised she couldn’t find the strength to use it._

_Tyreese came into the office and walked up to her. He knew it was over and he understood how difficult it was to put Bob down._

_“Give it here.” Tyreese said, holding his hand out to take the knife._

_Sasha felt the tears fall faster as she handed her older brother the knife. She kissed Bob’s hand and quickly made her way out of the office so that she could grieve. She didn’t need to see it._

_Tyreese started to cry as he approached Bob’s body. Lying on the sofa wasn’t just a dead friend. It was his dead brother-in-law. Though Bob and Sasha had never formally got married, Tyreese saw Bob as family. He placed a hand on Bob’s forehead and drove the knife deep into his ear to prevent reanimation._

_A few moments later, Tyreese emerged from the office with Bob’s body in his arms. He had wrapped him up in a white sheet and slowly walked past the others as he headed for the open church doors. Sasha followed him out with tears still running down her face._

Carol was also visibly upset by Tyreese’s passing. He was one of the finest examples of humanity she had ever met. He was always such a gentleman and despite the horrific pain she had inflicted upon him by killing his lover, he had found the strength within him to forgive her.

_Tyreese and Carol sat at the small table across from one another. They were still trying to process the shock and grief of what had happened earlier with Lizzie and Mika. Carol had her hand over the revolver she had used on Lizzie as it lay on the table. She couldn’t keep being alone with Tyreese and hide the truth from him. They had killed Lizzie because she was a danger and had murdered Mika. Carol had murdered Karen and David in an attempt to stop the flu from spreading. Tyreese deserved the truth._

_Carol pushed the revolver towards him, earning a look of confusion. “I killed Karen and David.” She confessed weakly._

_Tyreese’s confusion turned to shock as an intense aggression appeared in his eyes. The whole time they had been together he had been with the very person who had murdered his lover. Carol’s expression was weak. She knew Tyreese was going to kill her for it and she accepted that. She deserved it._

_“I had to stop the illness from breaking out.” Carol explained, her voice breaking. “I had to stop other people from dying.”_

_She could still see the confusion in Tyreese’s aggressive eyes._

_“It wasn’t Lizzie. It wasn’t a stranger.” Carol continued, her voice breaking more. “Tyreese, it was me.”_

_Tyreese looked around the room as tears began to fall from his eyes which he attempted to blink away. Carol looked down at the gun on the table, the handle was on Tyreese’s side of the table._

_“You do what you have to do.” She told him, accepting her fate._

_Tyreese grabbed the table tightly, the wood creaking under the strength of his grip. His primal instinct was to take the gun and kill her. She killed Karen. She had killed his happiness. She had broken his heart. He shook his head._

_“Did she know what was happening?” He asked weakly. “Was she scared?”_

_Carol shook her head. She had killed both of them while they slept so no pain or fear would be involved in their final moments._

_“It was quick?” Tyreese questioned._

_“Yes.” Carol replied with a very subtle and weak nod._

_Tyreese breathed heavily as he gripped the table and the gun. Carol had taken the most precious thing in his world away from him. Karen may have died from the flu but it was also possible that Hershel and the others could have saved her, just like they had done with Sasha._

_“Do what you have to do.” Carol repeated as she lowered her head in preparation for the end._

_Tyreese struggled as he continued to grip the revolver. Carol had killed Karen and David but she hadn’t done so in cold blood. She had done what she felt was necessary to save other people. She had been trying to protect everyone. It was the same reason she shot Lizzie just a couple of hours ago. Tyreese let go of the gun and moved his hand away from it. He stared at her._

_“I forgive you.” He told her, the aggression gone from his eyes but the pain overwhelmingly intense. “I’m never gonna forget. It happened. You did it. You feel it. I know you do. It’s a part of you now, me too.”_

_Carol felt like crying and could barely hold her tears back. Despite the horrendous anguish she had caused him, despite the emotional trauma she had put him through, Tyreese understood why she did it and chose to forgive her instead of exacting revenge._

_“But I forgive you.” He repeated, calming down._

Looking at Tyreese’s body, Noah felt tremendous guilt. He was the one who had wanted to go back to his house. Had he not done that, had he stuck by Tyreese’s side then perhaps the large man would still have been alive. Instead, Noah had acted like a fool, he had given up rational thought because of his emotions and that had ultimately led to Tyreese’s death. He wanted to give up and leave the group but he knew he couldn’t. Tyreese wouldn’t have agreed with that.

_Tyreese stood by Noah, who sat on the road as he continued to sob. Rick, Glenn and Michonne were at the end of one of the streets searching for supplies. There was an uncomfortable silence in the remains of the community. Tyreese shook his head. He knew what Noah was going through._

_“I wanted to die for what I’d lost. Who I’d lost. I stepped out into a crowd of those things, just trying to take it all out on them, until they took me. Put them all in front of me so that I didn’t see anything but I just kept going.” Tyreese explained to the sobbing teen in front of him. “Then later, I was there for Judith when she needed me. I saved her. I brought her back to her dad. That wouldn’t have happened if I had just given up, if I hadn’t chosen to live.”_

_He stepped closer to the teen whose sobs had calmed down slightly._

_“Noah. Noah.” Tyreese got his attention before placing a hand on his shoulder. “This isn’t the end.”_

_Noah’s sobbing ceased slowly as he calmed himself down. The teenager looked around at the decimated community before slowly rising to his feet._

_“There you go.” Tyreese commented with a nod. Noah was choosing to live._

Jason couldn’t believe that another member of their family was now dead. He had originally disliked Tyreese for his pacifistic, moral attitude that no longer belonged in the world they lived in. The more Jason thought about it, the more he realised that was what made Tyreese so special. The world had failed to break him. He had been the strongest man with the biggest heart he had ever met and probably ever would meet. Now he understood why his friend was a fan of Tyreese. It hadn’t been for his NFL playing. It had been for the kind soul that was visible to anyone who spoke to him. He would be missed dearly.

_Jason nodded before Rick turned round and walked out the room, closely followed by Daryl. Jason rubbed Carl’s back before standing up and collecting his gun from the floor. Carl followed Daryl and his father out the door while Tyreese choose to hang back with Jason. The two men started walking together._

_“What you have, you and Carl, it’s a good thing.” Tyreese commented as they walked out into the street. “Cherish it. I lost someone I loved back at the prison.”_

_Jason thought for a moment. He didn’t know Tyreese all that well as they rarely spoke to one another and he was too much of a pacifist for Jason’s liking. He supported his relationship with Carl, however, which earned the gentle giant a degree of respect in that moment._

_“I had someone before. Kellin. I met him before all this happened.” Jason explained, still uncomfortable with explaining it to anyone. “He was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I lost him seven months ago.”_

_Tyreese remained respectfully quiet. He knew what it was like to lose a loved one to the apocalypse and he didn’t dare ask how Kellin died. It didn’t matter. He had died because the apocalyptic world they lived in was cruel._

_“I wanted to die. I tried to die.” Jason continued. “For months on my own, trying to have it all end. But it never did.”_

_“Because you didn’t give up. That’s why you’re still alive.” Tyreese answered with a soft smile. “You chose life. And now you have Carl. He needs you and you need him. It’s a good thing you’re still here.”_

_“I guess.” Jason shrugged his shoulders._

_Jason viewed meeting Carl as luck. He always seemed to get lucky and he was smart enough to know that his luck would one day run out. Jason just wanted to spend the time between now and that day in the best way possible and that was with Carl. He’d do anything to keep Carl safe. He’d kill anyone._

Gabriel, with his bible in hand, gave an appropriate speech as each person stepped forward to shovel some earth into Tyreese’s grave.

“We look not at what can be seen,  
But at what cannot be seen.  
For what can be seen is temporary,  
But what cannot be seen is eternal.  
For we know that if the Earthly tent we live in is destroyed,  
We have a building from God,  
A house, not made from hands,  
Eternal, in the heavens.”

Sasha, who was still in shock and grief, could barely stand as she walked over and deposited her shovelful of earth into her brother’s grave. In a few hours the last member of her family had been taken from her.

As Sasha stumbled away, Rick took the shovel and started quickly burying Tyreese. He hated himself for not having been able to save his friend. He hated the world they lived in for making this happen, for making it normal. The deaths of Hershel, Beth and Tyreese gave Rick a new resolve, a new strength. He would get the group to safety. They would get to Washington. They would find or build a place and they would be safe. Rick wouldn’t let anything or anyone get in the way of that. Ever.

He stood up straight and gazed down at the grave. He apologised to Tyreese for not having saved him and promised to keep Sasha safe. Rick nodded at the cross which now wore Tyreese’s iconic beanie before walking back to the group. They still had one hundred miles to cover. They would get to Washington. For Tyreese.

 

**And it’s finally finished. Bloody hell that took longer than expected, which I apologise for. I found this particular chapter very difficult to write because the focus was almost exclusively on Tyreese and I had a 17 day time jump to deal with.**  
**The next few chapters will be a lot better and a lot more interesting. I honestly can’t wait to get Jason to Alexandria as I have loads of awesome stuff planned for that.**  
 **I hope this chapter was better to read than it was to write. I can’t judge it honestly so I leave it up to you, the readers. So please be sure to leave a comment/review.**

**As per, thanks for all the kudos/favourites/votes/follows/subscriptions/bookmarks etc.**

**Also thanks to my reviewers of chapter 14: rk0192, emilyymjoness, okamidenama, christian77611, MagnificentFern, heavensentskysky, j, Chancey, KingCarlGrimes, The_Man_Called_Madara, Sara and kgbufo.**


	16. Survive

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group continue their journey to DC on foot. Starving, dehydrated, with walkers on all sides and a watcher in the wings, will they make it? And why is Jason so pale?

_The leaves on the trees rustled in the late night summer breeze. The breeze was warm and pleasant as it made contact with the skin. The only sounds were that of the shaking vegetation and the distant cars in the streets below. Jason and Kellin lay back at the top of a grassy hill that was surrounded on all sides by trees and fields. They were a short distance away from their home town and were there as a way to escape the hustle and bustle of the town and be alone._

_Jason had his hands clasped together behind his neck as he stared up at the stars. The two lovers were fortunate to have a clear night sky so they could gaze up at the vast cosmos above them. The subtle twinkles of the stars combined with the moon’s strong reflection of the sun’s light. Jason loved to look at the stars. They reminded him how insignificant everything was compared to the incomprehensible scale of the universe._

_Kellin shuffled closer to him so that their shoulders and hips were touching as they lay on the grass together. He didn’t share the same fascination with the stars but he couldn’t deny their beauty. Any time spent with Jason was time well spent and so long as Jason was by his side he could lie there for hours. They didn’t even need to talk, just being together was sometimes enough, just knowing that someone who loved him was there for him._

_“You know, we’re actually looking into the distant past right now.” Jason broke the silence, smiling as he flaunted his knowledge. “It takes the light from those stars such a long time to reach us that most of them probably aren’t even there anymore.”_

_“Yeah?” Kellin responded in order to keep Jason talking. He repositioned himself so that his head rested on Jason’s chest._

_“Yeah. So if we could somehow go to a planet sixty-five million light years away and look at the Earth then we’d see the dinosaurs.” Jason continued, still smiling. “That’s really cool, I think.”_

_“You’re such a nerd.” Kellin giggled._

_“I’ll take that as a compliment.” Jason remarked with a grin._

_“It is.” Kellin replied with a matching smile._

_Jason moved one of his hands from under his head and brought it down to clasp one of Kellin’s hands. He gave it a gentle squeeze as he kept looking up at the starry night sky._

_“The stars remind me how pathetically small and insignificant the world is.” Jason explained gently. “There are things out there, billions of miles away that are billions of times the size of our little blue world.”_

_“Isn’t that kinda depressing?” Kellin wondered aloud. “Knowing we’re so small and meaningless. That we’re nothing to the universe?”_

_Jason squeezed Kellin’s hand again. “No because there’s something that we have that the universe doesn’t.”_

_“What?” Kellin asked, visibly confused by Jason’s assertion._

_Jason smiled as he sat up and kissed Kellin’s forehead. “Love. It doesn’t exist anywhere in the universe except for right here.”_

_Kellin smiled and turned his head so their lips could connect in a gentle moment of affection. The entire time that they spent kissing their hands remained clasped together. When they finally broke apart, Kellin gazed into Jason’s eyes with affection._

_“I want to get married someday.” He commented, blushing slightly from the confession._

_“We might need to move to Massachusetts for that.” Jason answered, playing with Kellin’s hair gently._

_“And I want kids.” Kellin added with a grin, getting excited at the thought._

_“You can be the one that gets pregnant then.” Jason joked before giving Kellin another quick peck on the lips._

_Kellin giggled playfully. “I’m too fragile for that so it’s got to be you.”_

_“You’re so silly.” Jason teased, tapping the end of Kellin’s nose with his finger._

_“No, I’m not.” Kellin retorted with a playful grin and gave Jason a light punch on the shoulder._

_“Yes you are.” Jason countered and ruffled Kellin’s hair._

_“Shut up.” Kellin ordered with a teasing glare._

_“Make me.” Jason challenged his lover with a grin._

_Kellin sat up and turned around so that he could kiss Jason strongly. The force of his kiss was enough to push Jason onto his back, allowing Kellin to get on top of him and straddle him. They broke the kiss for a moment to smile at each other before letting their lips lock together again. Nothing else mattered as they loved each other under the starry night sky._

A high pitched noise pierced Jason’s ears, rousing him from his sleep. He opened his eyes and was instantly met with sunlight streaming in through the window of the van that forced him to quickly shut his eyes again. He moved his face to the side before slowly opening his eyes. They burned with fatigue and his eyelids were heavy. Jason yawned long and wide, his jaw cracking along with his back as he stretched himself into waking.

The loud noise was still attacking his ears as he slowly became aware of his surroundings. He was asleep in the large white van they had found a couple days ago. It had been four days since Tyreese’s death. Jason shifted over to the still sleeping Carl and removed the wailing Judith from his arms. She was hungry. They all were. He removed her bottle from the bag that rested in the middle of the floor to discover it was the last of her formula. Jason grimaced. They had to find something that day.

As Jason held Judith in his arms and gently tilted the bottle as he fed her, relieved that her crying had stopped before a headache started, he looked up and noticed Rick watching him from the driver’s seat.

“Morning.” Jason greeted lowly so as to not wake the others.

“Thanks.” Rick replied. “You treat her like she’s yours.”

Jason smiled, realising it was rather true. Kellin’s adoration for kids must have rubbed off on him more than he realised. He also never failed to recognise how important Judith was to the group and to Rick and Carl.

“She’s out of formula.” Jason told the bearded man. “We need to find something she can eat.”

“We will.” Rick answered, more to himself than to Jason before stepping out of the van.

As soon as the van door closed, Carl’s eyes fluttered open as the sound and vibration brought him back into the awakened world. He sat up and yawned with a stretch before his eyes settled on Jason feeding Judith. He smiled at the sight as Jason smiled back.

“Don’t know what I’m going to do when she gets older.” Jason commented with a playful smirk. “She’s a fantastic alarm clock.”

Carl let out a quiet laugh at the remark, mindful of the others who were mostly still sleeping. Some were in the process of waking and Daryl, as usual, was nowhere to be found. He always woke before anyone else and disappeared into the woods by the time the sun had risen. Jason finished feeding Judith and patted her back before placing her in her bag. He quickly leaned over and kissed Carl on the cheek. Jason couldn’t help but grin with amusement at how little actions in front of everyone always made Carl blush.

“We need to look for supplies.” Jason told his younger lover as he put on his jacket. “Want to come with me to look for water?”

Carl nodded with a smile, reaching for his hat. “Sure.”

 

The sun blasted down through the gaps in the trees with an unrelenting intensity. The temperature was almost unbearable and the humidity levels were also quite high. It hadn’t rained in weeks, leaving the ground hard and dry. Some plants were beginning to wilt while the larger trees used up their water reserves to survive the unusually long summer. The birds continued to sing their daily chorus in the branches above.

Jason and Carl trudged through the foliage as they made their way through the woodland. They were searching for water and food. They walked as if there were no dangers, both their guns holstered and their knives sheathed. Constantly darting their eyes around them and listening for any suspicious noises had become second nature, allowing them to talk as they walked.

“Do you think Eugene’s right about Washington?” Carl asked the older teen as his eyes scanned the area.

“Eugene’s a smart guy so he’s got to be on to something.” Jason answered, also remaining observant. “The government would have tried to protect the president, surely.”

“What if there’s nothing there?” Carl questioned, the survivalist within him cynical.

“The city itself will have supplies at least.” Jason responded after a moment of thought. “We’ll just have to work it out from there.”

The snarl of a walker interrupted them as the rotting body of a man stumbled towards them. It had no hair, no nose and no ears. Flies buzzed around it incessantly as its skin appeared to be moister than usual. From the education in biology that Jason had before the apocalypse, he assumed it to be the result of the heat. The walker was decomposing faster than usual.

Jason stepped ahead of Carl to deal with it. He unsheathed his machete and waited for the undead creature to close the gap between them before he struck it in the forehead with the machete. The blade went through the front of the skull with ease and stopped the walker in its tracks. The body slumped to the floor after Jason removed the blade. The stench of decay forced him to turn away with his hand covering his nose as he returned to Carl.

As he sheathed the machete, a loud grumble sounded. Carl blushed in embarrassment and Jason couldn’t help but laugh.

“Either rotting flesh makes you hungry or you skipped breakfast.” Jason commented.

“I skipped breakfast.” Carl admitted. “We don’t have any food left.”

Jason went down on one knee and took his backpack off. He rummaged around in it for a few seconds before pulling out a granola bar. He handed it to Carl with a soft smile on his face.

“Here. It’s the last one.” Jason told him, zipping his bag back up.

“We should share it.” Carl answered.

“You didn’t eat yesterday.” Jason commented. “You need the energy.”

“You didn’t eat either.” Carl countered.

Carl unwrapped the granola bar and broke it in half, handing one half over to Jason. Jason sighed before smiling as he took the half that was offered to him. He was gradually learning that there was no arguing with Carl when the boy was certain that he was in the right.

They ate the granola bar in silence as they continued to walk through the woods. Jason would be lying if he said that eating something that tasty wasn’t a relief and a great way to start the morning. The unfortunate thing about the half bar was that it wasn’t enough for either of them. Both of them needed about ten granola bars to even feel half full given how hungry they were.

They walked along what at first appeared to be a dirt path. Upon closer inspection of the various animal bones and dead frogs it was clear they were walking up a dried up river. The rains were terribly late and they desperately needed water. They exited the dense foliage into a small clearing in the middle of which stood an abandoned wooden shack.

The two teens shared a glance at one another before unholstering their guns. They kept their guns at the ready as they walked up to the door of the shack with Jason placing his hand on the handle. Carl aimed his own gun at the door in preparation for what could be behind it. They both took a breath and shared a nod before making their move.

The wooden door groaned as it swung open as Jason stepped inside, aiming his gun around him as his eyes scanned for any walkers. The stench of rotting flesh filled their nostrils causing both of them to cough and splutter in disgust. A loud buzzing could also be heard. Jason took the lead and followed the buzzing sound with his gun aimed at the ready.

Jason lowered his gun as he took in the sight that was laid out before him in the next room. There were two dead bodies in the room, one of them was sprawled out on the floor and looked to be that of a woman. Her face was too badly decomposed and covered in flies and larvae to be identifiable. Her blonde hair hinted at her previous beauty. Jason only identified it as a woman based on the small white jacket and the high heeled boots. At her side lay an empty desert eagle with a brushed chrome finish.

On the opposite side of the room was the body of a man, easily identified by the combat boots, military pea coat and lack of hair. His body was also swarmed with flies and larvae that were in the process of devouring his rotting flesh. The gunshot wound at the top of his head and the blood splatter on the wall above it told the story. In one of the man’s gloved hands was a Taurus PT909 handgun which he had used to kill himself with and in the other hand was an old music box. On top of the music box was a piece of paper. Jason braved the stench and the flies to look at what was written on it.

SHERRY, YOU WERE MY LIFE. I CAN’T FACE THIS NIGHTMARE WITHOUT YOU. PLEASE WAIT FOR ME. I’LL SEE YOU SOON.  JAKE.

Jason dropped the note and rubbed his eyes. He wasn’t sure if they were watering from the horrible smell or from the realisation that this could have easily been him the night Kellin died. The man’s clothes and haircut gave the impression he had been involved with the military at some point before the world ended. He would have been skilled enough to survive longer but chose not to without his lover.

Jason bent down and picked up the handgun. He checked the clip and discovered that only one shot had been fired. He flicked the safety on and shoved the gun into the inside pocket of his leather jacket. Jason then lifted the music box and studied its pink and gold colouration before opening it up. On the inside was the figure of a ballerina with a mirror on the inside of the lid. The figure didn’t move and no music played. It was broken.

“Can we leave?” Carl’s voice sounded from the doorway.

Jason jumped, he had completely forgotten that Carl was even with him for a few moments. He relaxed himself and turned to Carl with the music box still in his hand.

“The smell is making me feel sick.” Carl justified his question.

Jason nodded and walked over to his younger lover. “Let’s head back, your dad will start wondering where we are.”

As Carl lead them out of the shack and back into the clearing, Jason placed the music box in his backpack. He wasn’t sure why he had made the decision to take it. It could be used to entertain Judith if they could fix it or if it was unrepairable then they could use the parts for something.

 

After a few minutes of quickly walking through the woodland, Jason and Carl burst out of the tree line and onto the road. They were instantly met with several guns pointed at them but a raise of the hands and a smile was all that was necessary. In front of them the rest of the group minus Daryl, Sasha and Maggie were sitting round the van.

“Find anything?” Rick asked the two as they approached and sat down.

“Nothing useful.” Jason answered with a disappointed sigh.

The sentiment was echoed by the rest of the group. None of them had found anything useful either. The look on the faces of the returning Daryl, Sasha and Maggie told the same story. They didn’t have much fuel left, they were out of food, had barely any water and still had to travel about sixty more miles before they would reach Washington. Things weren’t looking good. The look on the faces of the returning Daryl, Sasha and Maggie told the same story.

 

The engine of the van spluttered as it ran out of fuel. The van slowly ground to a halt, the breaks whining loudly. They had managed another twenty miles before the fuel supply had run dry. Looking around it was clear they were in the middle of nowhere, stranded on one of the many long and winding country roads.

“We’re out.” Abraham told them, sitting at the wheel. “Just like the other one.”

“So we walk.” Rick answered before opening the passenger side door and stepping out onto the road.

Upon Rick’s command everyone opened the van doors and stepped out onto the hot tarmac. They grabbed their bags and weapons and mentally prepared themselves for the long and arduous trek that stretched out before them. The afternoon heat from the sun was unforgivably punishing as it forced itself down upon them.

Half an hour later, they continued down the road as one large group. They tried their best to stick to the side with more shade provided to them by the never ending tree line. They all walked slowly, they had such little energy left that even walking quickly was a struggle. They were doing their best to conserve everything they had left, ammo, water and energy.

Rick and Daryl lead the group as they walked out at the front. Rick was carrying Judith in his arms as he matched his pace with that of the archer. Daryl looked behind them at the very end of the group. Following the group was a group of walkers that was gradually increasing in size. Rick turned to observe them before returning his gaze to the road ahead.

“We’re not at our strongest. We’ll get them when it’s best.” Rick commented. “High ground, something like that. They’re not going anywhere.”

Rick noticed Daryl’s lack of response. The archer had been withdrawn from the group ever since Beth died. Despite the best efforts by various members in the group to get him to come out of his shell, Daryl had remained quiet and closed off.

“It’s been three weeks since Atlanta.” Rick continued. “I know you lost something back there.”

Judith started to make gentle sounds of complaint.

“She’s hungry.” Daryl answered, turning his head to check the baby and avoid the subject of Beth.

Judith had quietened down again. “She’s okay.” Rick answered. “She’s gonna be okay.”

“We need to find water.” Daryl told him. They’re chances of survival were slim without the simple liquid. “Food.”

“We’ll hit some on the road.” Rick replied, looking up at the gathering clouds. “It’s gonna rain sooner or later.”

Daryl slowed down and handed Rick his Narinco rifle. “I’m gonna head out, see what I can find.”

Rick took the rifle and placed the strap round his shoulder. “Hey, don’t be too long.”

“I’ll go with you.” Carol offered as the group slowed to a stand-still.

“Nah, I got it.” Daryl refused as he headed for the trees.

“You gonna stop me?” Carol challenged as she stepped towards him with a smile.

Daryl didn’t bother to respond as he knew the answer was no. He simply prepared his crossbow and headed into the foliage with Carol hard on his heels.

The rest of the group continued on down the road with Rick leading the pack. They couldn’t afford to slow down with the walkers gathering behind them and following relentlessly, no matter how slow they shuffled along. As they walked, Jason rubbed his forehead from the sweat that was gathering. His leather jacket was acting as an enemy with the heat but he dared not take it off. The very same jacket had saved him too many times. Jason sighed as he at least unzipped the jacket to give himself slight relief.

Out of his peripheral vision he caught Gabriel catching up to his pace to walk with him. Jason sighed as he knew that even before the priest opened his mouth that he was already completely uninterested in anything the man had to say.

“About last week, I just want to say that it is the sin I don’t approve of.” Gabriel explained. “I don’t disapprove of you as a person, I can’t hate the sinner.”

“So love is a sin now, is it?” Jason countered quickly, not even looking at the man.

“Homosexuality is a sin.” Gabriel responded, confused.

“Well, I love Carl. So my homosexual love for him is a sin, right?” Jason answered, turning to glare at him. “Does that sound as stupid to you as it does to me?”

“It still goes against the word of God.” Gabriel argued as best he could. “Those who go against Him are not offered the gift of salvation in heaven.”

“I don’t want his bloody salvation! If your God didn’t cause all of this then he sure as hell didn’t try to stop it!” Jason barked angrily. “He’s never been one to shy away from genocide now and again either!”

Gabriel stared back, stunned by Jason’s anger and comments. He wasn’t sure how to answer him and his nerves were kicking in. Jason was intimidating when angered.

“Yeah, I might not believe but I was baptised Catholic you know!” Jason continued just as fiercely. “I’ve read the bible. I know what God is like. So don’t try to convert me!”

“This could be a test.” Gabriel attempted. “He could be searching for the right people to rebuild his world.”

“Do you live in your own little world?” Jason scolded him. “I’m not interested in what your God thinks nor do I want to be a part of a celestial North Korea.”

“Please. I’m trying to save you.” Gabriel answered, his voice softening.

“No you’re not! You are forcing your beliefs down my throat!” Jason growled back, his face going red from the blood rush. “We have saved your life three times now. Don’t forget that.”

“How about keeping it down.” Abraham called back at them. “We don’t need to attract any more of those dead freaks.”

Jason glared at Gabriel before increasing his pace to get ahead of him. Carl matched his pace and remained at his side. From where he walked with Jason, Carl could see that Maggie was still visibly upset over Beth’s death. She was like an older sister to him too as he had spent a lot of time with her at the prison. He wanted to try and make her feel a little better or take her mind off it. That’s when he remembered.

“Jason, can you give me the music box?” Carl asked the older teen.

Jason looked at Carl with intrigue before slipping the backpack off his shoulders and reaching in for the music box. Once he found it he pulled out the pink and golden box and handed it to the younger teen. Carl smiled as he took hold of it before speeding up his steps until he reached Maggie’s side.

“Found this when we were looking for water.” Carl told her as he handed it to her.

“What is it?” Maggie asked, not able to identify it with the lid closed.

“I think it used to play music.” Carl replied with a shrug.

Maggie opened the lid and took in the sight of the little ballerina in front of the small mirror. Apart from the creak of the hinges as she opened it, no other sound came from the box.

“It’s broken.” Carl added with a sigh.

Maggie smiled softly and turned to face him as she closed the box. “Thanks Carl.”

Carl nodded in acknowledgement of her gratitude. “Thought you might like it.”

Maggie smiled and nodded gently. Carl then increased his pace to catch up with Jason who was walking ahead of them but had started slowing down. When he caught up with the older teen, he noticed that Jason was sweating more and his face had lost some colour. His breathing was also laboured.

“Are you okay?” Carl asked him, placing a hand on Jason’s arm.

Jason brought his fingers up to rub his heavy eyes and nodded before smiling weakly at Carl. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

“You look ill.” Carl told him, reminding Jason that his observation skills were good.

Jason smiled wider as he blinked more often than usual and wrapped his arm around Carl’s shoulders. He pulled the younger teen closer and forced him to match his pace perfectly with the embrace.

“You’re sweet, Carl.” Jason commented, his breathing still heavy. “But you don’t need to worry about little old me. I promise.”

Carl wanted to argue the point. He knew that Jason wasn’t feeling well because he could see it stamped on his face. He also knew that Jason could be quite stubborn about these things. Carl sighed and decided to drop the subject for the time being. Jason removed his arm from around Carl as the embrace only made the effect of the heat worse.

As he walked behind them, Gabriel continued to fidget with the collar of his shirt. It was a tight shirt and the heat made it unbearable to wear. Maggie turned when his movements caught her peripheral vision so that their eyes locked.

“They used to joke that these things were leftovers from the days of hairshirts.” Gabriel started conversation. “The church actually made shirts out of hair so that if you wore it you could atone, just a little, for your sins.”

“I know what a hairshirt is.” Maggie answered, earning a surprised look. “My daddy was religious. I used to be.”

“If you ever wanna talk about your father or about Beth…” Gabriel started, trying to at least bond with someone in the group.

“Please stop.” Maggie hissed.

Gabriel nodded but his impulses got the better of him. “Whenever you’re ready, I’m here.”

“You never even met them.” Maggie retorted.

“I know you’re in pain.” Gabriel continued his attempt.

“You don’t know shit. You had a job. You were there to save your flock, right?” Maggie growled. “But you didn’t. You hid. Don’t try to act like that didn’t happen.”

Maggie paced ahead of the priest who was frozen to the spot. She was right. He had been a coward and had left those people to die. Despite the murderous, immoral nature of the group he was with, none of them seemed to be willing to forgive him for what he did.

The group continued to march along the road. They had closed their ranks and were less spread out with them taking up the full width of the road. Behind them the walker group had increased its numbers to over twenty. They refused to acknowledge the walking corpses until they were in a position to take them out.

Carl had taken Judith from Rick so the man’s arms could be rested for a while. The baby became very heavy after carrying her for over an hour. They were all dehydrated and starving. Walking had originally been painful on the feet and legs but now all of them felt only a numb impact with each step. Carl also noticed that Jason’s steps had become uneven and his feet occasionally scuffed the tarmac before he resumed his slow pace. He wasn’t well and he kept denying it. Carl was growing more and more concerned.

“Just want to say…while I still can that is.” Jason announced. “If I happen to collapse, feel free to leave me. I’ll slow those bastards down.”

“Don’t even joke about that!” Carl scolded him quickly, glaring at the older teen.

Even Rick turned his head to his son’s boyfriend. He could see that Jason’s face had lost more of its colour and he was panting with exertion.

“We’re all going to make it.” Rick told him gruffly. “No one gets left behind.”

Jason lowered his gaze to the road. He couldn’t understand why he had even said that. It had sounded funny in his head for some reason but upon hearing it and seeing Carl’s reaction to it, there was no humour to be found. It confused him.

“On a planet that is seventy percent water.” Jason commented between breaths. “How can it be so difficult to find some?”

“We’ll find water soon.” Rick answered, though Jason knew it was just to be the optimistic leader.

Sasha and Michonne were at the back of the group. Both walked slowly to conserve energy though they had a subtle stream of adrenaline going through their systems with each snarl of the walkers behind them. Sasha turned to observe the group of walkers.

“We can take them.” Sasha affirmed, confident.

Michonne looked at the walkers. “Rick’s right. We barely have anything left. No use spending it all now.”

Sasha stopped walking and turned to the walkers again. “I can take them.”

“Your brother was pissed too.” Michonne told her. “After what he lost. It made him stupid.”

“We are not the same.” Sasha hissed. “We never were.”

“But it’s still the same.” Michonne replied with a smile and shrug. “It just is.”

The two women resumed walking and increased their pace to catch up with the rest of the group. The road stretched out in front of them for miles.

 

Daryl and Carol trudged through the long grass in search of water. Their eyes scanned the ground for any signs of water of any sort. The ground was hard beneath their feet, the mud cracking with how dry it was and the grass itself was brittle.

“Anything?” Carol asked, breaking the silence.

“No, it’s too dry.” Daryl answered. “There ain’t nothing here.”

“Maybe we should start back.” Carol suggested. They didn’t want to put too great a distance between themselves and the group.

“You go.” Daryl replied, turning away from her.

“I think she saved my life.” Carol stated, referring to Beth. “She saved your life too, right?”

Daryl was silent. He didn’t want to talk about Beth, he didn’t want to have to deal with the pain of loss every single day. She had brightened up his life and he had lost her. He had tried to get her back only to watch her die in front of him. He failed to save her and it was killing him inside.

Carol closed the distance between them and handed him a knife in a sheath. “It was hers.”

Daryl took the knife and felt his body shake. He grit his teeth and bit back the emotions welling up inside of him.

“We’re not dead.” Carol told him. “It’s what you said.”

Daryl looked back at her. His face was weak, the usual intensity it contained had vanished. He wanted to cry but refused to allow himself to do so.

“You’re not dead. I know you. We’re different.” Carol explained, struggling with her own emotions. “I can’t let myself…but you? I know you. You have to let yourself feel it.”

Daryl continued to stare back at her with the same expression. He didn’t know what to say or do and he was afraid that if he said anything he would lose his self-control and start crying right then and there. Carol brushed some of his long hair out of his eyes with her hand and stood on her tiptoes so she could kiss his forehead.

“You will.” Carol finished before stepping away and beginning to walk back towards the group.

 

As the group continued to walk along the seemingly never ending road they spotted a bridge ahead of them. The bridge was level with the road but on either side of it there was a long drop down into a dried up river. Rick considered if it was a good enough place to take on the group of walkers. There was a heavy risk to it and he didn’t want to chance it unless they had to.

As they walked, Carl turned his head to check on Jason and noticed his face to be much paler than it had been before. A strong sense of concern shot through him. His boyfriend was not well and had denied anyone to check on him. If no one would check up on Jason then Carl would do it himself.

“Jason, you’re not okay.” Carl told him.

“I’m fine, trust me.” Jason answered with a weak smile.

Once he had turned his face away from Carl, Jason felt a cold shiver shoot through his body as his legs started to feel like jelly. His breathing was still laboured and he could feel the sweat running down his face. His eyelids felt heavy and he fought to keep them open. His head started to spin. Jason looked at Carl one more time and when he did his vision went blurry. Before he could say anything or shake his head or blink his eyes to clear his vision the sounds around him faded and his vision went black.

“Jason!” Carl called out in panic.

Rick and the others turned in time to see the older teen collapse to the ground on his front, the side of his head slamming into the road with an unpleasant thud. Carl had been unable to help him because he was carrying Judith in his arms so he had no other choice but to watch his lover drop to the floor.

Jason lay flat on his front in the road. The side of his head was cut from where it had hit the pavement and his face was very pale. He didn’t move nor did he make a sound as he appeared to be unconscious. The group were confused as his collapse had come from nowhere. Michonne rushed to his side and checked on him, attempting to shake him awake.

“He’s out.” She told the others while trying to waken him.

Rick looked back at the advancing group of walkers that were snarling even louder than before. It was as if the undead corpses had heard Jason’s earlier suggestion and were now desperate to eat him. Rick couldn’t allow it but they also couldn’t carry Jason very far.

“Get him to the other side of the bridge.” Rick ordered, thinking quickly. “We’ll make a stand here.”

Eugene and Rosita rushed over to Jason’s unconscious form and lifted him up and wrapped his arms around their shoulders. They groaned with effort as they slowly pulled him ahead towards the other side of the bridge. Carl followed them as closely as possible, deeply concerned about his boyfriend’s health.

“Michonne, Sasha, Abraham, Maggie, Glenn, you five stay.” Rick told them, forming the plan in his mind. “Spread out and push them over the edge.”

The remainder of the group, Tara, Gabriel and Noah, followed the others across the bridge to the other side. They were all tense. One of their members were unconscious and the group as a whole was at its weakest. The five choosing to face the group of walkers could easily get killed as none of them had energy worth sparing to fight the cannibalistic corpses.

Rick stood at the edge of the small ravine and looked down. The depth was enough to keep the walkers away and the steepness of the hill itself meant they would never climb back up. They would just need to be very careful not to fall down it themselves. Rick, Glenn and Michonne took one side of the road while Sasha, Maggie and Abraham took the other side. Rick walked towards the advancing group of walkers and nodded to the others. They were ready.

The large group of walkers snarled and growled loudly and relentlessly as they stumbled closer and closer to their living prey. The stench of rotting corpses was nauseating. Rick stepped back once he had the attention of a couple walkers, looking over his shoulder to make sure he didn’t step too far back. The first walker reached him and snarled loudly as it stretched out its arms in an attempt to grab Rick. The bearded man grabbed the walker and pushed it as he side stepped, sending it tumbling over the edge to its death.

Two more walkers advanced on Abraham at the same time. With each arm he pushed them out of his way and down into the ravine with a grunt. Glenn tiredly stepped forward in front of Rick and guided another walker over the edge with a forceful push. Michonne walked forward and twisted her body out of the way of the lunging walker, allowing it to step off the edge and plummet to the ground below.

Sasha stepped forward and grabbed a walker by the collar. Her hatred of the undead and the grief over the death of her brother prevented her from pushing it anywhere. She held onto it and stared into its dead eyes as it growled at her.

“Sasha!” Michonne warned.

As the others looked on concerned. Their plan was already dangerous without anyone taking unnecessary risks. Sasha quickly stabbed the walker she was holding onto in the head. Rick marched forward and withdrew his machete.

“Stay in line.” He commanded. “Flank her. Keep it controlled.”

Rick marched forward and swung his machete at the closest walker, decapitating it instantly.

“Plan just got dicked.” Abraham commented as he withdrew his knife and Maggie did the same.

Sasha marched forward and stabbed another walker in the forehead, pulling the knife back out with an angry growl. A figure to her right caught her attention so she swung her knife that way only for her arm to be caught by Michonne.

“Stop! Just get outta here.” Michonne commanded with a glare.

Sasha whipped her arm away from Michonne and ignored her command. Glenn stabbed a walker in the head and fell to the ground with it. Rick slashed the head of the next walker that was lunging for Glenn which gave Glenn enough time to get up and stab another walker. Sasha continued her assault by stabbing yet another walker under the chin.

Rick decapitated another walker and roared in fear as a second walker grabbed his arm with both its hands and leaned down to bite him, its teeth only an inch from his flesh. Rick tried to pull his arm away but the walker simply followed the movement. Suddenly Daryl came up behind the walker and grabbed its head so he could pull it off of Rick before stabbing it in the head.

Sasha stabbed a walker in the head before whipping round to slash the neck of the one behind her. Her blade nearly decapitated the walker and also slashed Abraham’s upper arm, earning her an angry glare from the soldier. Sasha staggered on the spot as Abraham finished off the nearly decapitated walker. She gathered what remained of her strength and stabbed yet another walker in the head as Michonne decapitated one of the others. The final one was about to grab Sasha but she was pushed out of the way by Michonne before the samurai cut the walker’s skull in two with her katana.

“I told you to stop.” Michonne hissed at the other woman who lay on the ground where she was pushed off balance.

Sasha got to her feet and tightened her grip on the handle of her knife. She stepped forward and glared daggers into Michonne’s eyes as both of them panted to get their breath back. It almost looked like Sasha was contemplating an attack on Michonne but the samurai was clearly ready for anything. Sasha walked away from the other woman and sheathed her knife as she headed across the bridge. Michonne and the others followed her over.

When they reached the other side where the rest of the group were, Rick made his way to where Jason was. Rosita had placed Jason’s bag under his head like a pillow and had Eugene stand over him to keep his head in the shade. She had also cleaned up the cut on his head that he had received when he fell. Carl was kneeling at his side, holding his hand gently.

“How is he?” Rick asked as he approached.

“Still unconscious.” Rosita replied, looking up at the bearded man. “We won’t know until he wakes up.”

Rick nodded and noticed how Carl appeared to be completely zoned out from the conversation. His son was focused on Jason, looking for any signs that he was waking up. Worry was etched on his face and was clear to see.

“Then we wait.” Rick told them. They needed to get their breath back after fighting the walkers anyway.

“Please wake up.” Carl whispered to Jason as he continued to watch over him.

 

_Kellin yawned loudly before resting his head on Jason’s shoulder. It was the early hours of the morning and Jason had forced them both out and onto the beach. In the distance the town was coming to life with all the shops opening and receiving their deliveries. Jason appeared to be quite animated but Kellin himself just wanted to sleep._

_“Jay, why are we out here at this time?” Kellin asked him in a tired grumble._

_“I want you to see something.” Jason replied, rubbing his lover’s back with one hand._

_“Can’t I see it later?” Kellin complained. “You know I need my beauty sleep or I get grumpy. You don’t like it when I’m grumpy.”_

_Jason chuckled softly. “This can’t wait and it’s worth making you grumpy for.”_

_Kellin yawned again and stretched his arms and legs in an effort to wake up a little more. He scratched his head and moved his hair into a better position. No one was nearby that could see them but by force of habit he wanted to be presentable. The loudest sound close to them was the soft crashing of the waves._

_“So what is it you want me to see?” Kellin asked, rubbing his eyes._

_“This.” Jason answered and gestured towards the horizon._

_Kellin turned his head away from Jason and looked out past the waves to the horizon. As if rising out of the water, the sun slowly came into view as an intense golden orb. Large streaks of orange shot out from the orb itself and highlighted the low hanging clouds and reflected on the water causing the waves to sparkle. The darkness of night slowly faded and was replaced with the light of day. The cool night time air was gradually heated by the warm rays of the sun._

_“Wow…it’s beautiful.” Kellin commented, mesmerised by the sunrise._

_Jason smiled and wrapped an arm around Kellin’s waist, pulling him close. “It’s the second most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”_

_Kellin turned his head to lock eyes with Jason. “Second? What’s the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen then?”_

_Jason smiled. “You.”_

_Kellin smiled back and blushed lightly at the compliment. Jason took the moment’s silence to lean in and capture Kellin’s lips with his own. Kellin wrapped his arms around Jason’s neck while Jason wrapped his own arms round Kellin’s waist. They remained like that, embraced and liplocked on the beach until the sun finished rising into the morning sky. The only sound was the soft crash of the waves._

Jason’s eyes fluttered open, the sunlight stinging them painfully. He groaned and held his forehead with one of his hands. He had a splitting headache. He tried to sit up but his body still felt like jelly. Jason turned his head slowly to the side as Carl squeezed his hand.

“He’s awake!” Carl called to the others.

Before Jason could piece together what was going on he already had Rosita and Rick staring down at him. Rosita crouched by his side and offered him a drink of water. He initially wanted to refuse it but the looks of concern he was getting from everyone made him change his mind. Jason took the bottle and swallowed a mouthful of the life-giving liquid the nature of which was pleasing to his dry mouth and throat.

“How’re you feeling?” Rosita asked him, placing a hand on his head to check his temperature.

“Exhausted, weak, got a splitting headache.” Jason answered with a groan.

“When did you last eat?” Rosita asked him, trying to work out what was wrong.

“This morning while looking for water.” Jason answered with a groan. “Carl and I shared a granola bar.”

Rosita nodded as she continued to think. “And before that?”

Jason paused to think. He found it uncomfortable having everyone stare at him in a mix of confusion and concern. The last any of them had eaten was the day before but the same could not be said for him.

“Four days ago. I think.” Jason answered with a sigh.

This earned him a lot of surprised and confused looks, especially from Carl. Carl felt guilty for not having noticed that Jason hadn’t been eating for days.

“What made you stop eating?” Rick asked him, crouching down like Rosita and tilting his head.

“After Tyreese…I lost my appetite.” Jason explained slowly, feeling guilty. “So I gave my food to Carl so that he’d be okay. It became a habit.”

Carl looked hurt. He felt horrible realising that he had been eating Jason’s food and allowing the older teen to effectively starve himself. Jason felt horrible when he saw the look on Carl’s face.

“Can you stand?” Rick asked him.

Jason slowly sat up and with a grunt of effort managed to rise to his feet. He put his backpack back on and swayed a little on the spot. Carl gave Judith over to Rick who placed her in a carrying bag that he could wear on his back. Carl then took Jason’s hand as a show of support and to help him stay upright. Jason smiled and squeezed Carl’s hand as he steadied himself.

“I’m good to walk some more.” He commented. “I’ll tell you if I need to stop.”

“Promise?” Carl asked, both in a worried and angry tone.

“I promise.” Jason repeated with a nod.

Half an hour later they continued their journey down the road. Rick took the lead with Judith in his arms and his Narinco rifle in his hands. Carl walked beside him in tandem while still holding onto Jason who continued to feel light headed from time to time. The group hadn’t uttered a word in a while as there had been nothing worth saying. The road stretched on endlessly and silently. They hadn’t seen any walkers since the bridge.

“Dad, look.” Carl called as they came to the top of a hill in the road.

They stopped in their tracks. At the end of the small hill were several abandoned cars. There was the potential for supplies to still be inside them. It was a scavenging opportunity they couldn’t pass up.

“I’m gonna head off into the woods and circle back.” Daryl told them.

“Can I come with?” Carol asked him like she had done previously.

“Nah, just me.” Daryl denied her and headed off into the trees.

 The rest of the group made their way to the cars and split off into smaller units to search each and every one of the cars. Jason rested some of his weight against the side of a land rover and when he did there was a slam against the inside of the window. There was a walker trapped inside. It was inconvenient but it also meant that supplies could be inside, protected from people unwilling to kill the walker.

Jason made his way to the door and prepared to open it but a smaller hand landed on top of his own, stopping him. He knew without looking that the hand belonged to Carl. He turned his head to the younger teen.

“You need to rest.” Carl told him. “I’ll do it.”

“Are you sure?” Jason asked as he stepped aside.

Carl didn’t answer because he didn’t need to. Jason knew he was sure and he knew Carl could handle a single walker. Carl pulled open the door and stepped back because of the horrendous stench that erupted from inside the car. The walker snarled as it leaned over the passenger side chair in an effort to grab him. Carl unsheathed his knife and drove it forcefully into the forehead of the walker, ending its miserable existence. Michonne opened the back door and helped to pull the body out of the car and discard it on the side of the road.

Jason stepped into the car and sat in the passenger seat. He opened the glove box in search of supplies but only found a map and a half empty pack of cigarettes. He took the map as it could prove to be useful if they figured out where they actually were.

“Does anyone smoke?” Jason asked Michonne and Carl out of curiosity.

“Daryl.” Michonne answered.

Jason nodded and pocketed the half empty pack of cigarettes. He would give it to the archer upon his return.

Maggie slowly walked over to one of the cars with her knife in her hand. She rubbed the dirt from the window to look inside for any lingering walkers but discovered that the car was vacant. She opened the driver’s side door and leaned inside, checking under the arm rest for any supplies but failed to find any. She sat in the driver’s seat and opened the glove box but inside there were only paper documents. Nothing important. She sighed in defeat. The keys were still in the ignition so she gave them a turn. Unsurprisingly, the car’s battery was flat.

Maggie took the keys and got out the car. She walked round to the back so she could look inside the trunk. She inserted the key into the lock, turned it and opened the trunk. As the door rose into the air she was greeted with a horrific sight. A walker who once was a blonde teenage girl lay inside with its wrists and ankles tied together and a gag across its mouth. It was weak and had obviously been left there for over a year. The poor girl had been trapped in the trunk and had slowly died of dehydration. It reminded Maggie of Beth who could have also ended up this way after her kidnap by the police at Grady Memorial.

Maggie slammed the door shut. She started walking away but the walker began banging on the inside of the door, constantly reminding Maggie of its presence. The poor girl had been kidnapped, probably raped, then bound and gagged before being left to slowly die in the trunk of a car where no one would find her. Instead of preserving some of her dignity by killing her reanimated body, Maggie instead had chosen to walk away from her. Just like her kidnappers had done.

Maggie couldn’t do that to the girl. If it had been Beth she would have wanted someone to end it. She returned to the back of the car and tried to open the door but it was jammed. Years of disuse had allowed rust to do its damage to the mechanism. Maggie fought with the door desperately but it wouldn’t budge. She slammed her hands on the car in frustration and pulled out her Smith & Wesson Model 327 Performance Centre R8 revolver. She aimed it at the lock, willing to waste a bullet in order to give the kidnapped girl some final dignity.

Glenn’s hand on her arm stopped her. “Maggie?”

“There’s one in there and I shut it and it’s still in there.” Maggie explained with a shaky voice.

Glenn rested his rifle against the car and grabbed the handle. He turned the keys and pulled at the door strongly but it didn’t move. He summoned more of his strength and turned and pulled at the same time, forcing the door to lift open once again. As soon as he laid eyes on the walker he realised why Maggie had been so disturbed by it. Glenn pulled out his knife and stabbed it in the head swiftly. He picked up his rifle and placed his other hand on Maggie’s shoulder.

“Let’s go.” He told her quietly, earning a weary smile from his wife.

 

Daryl wandered through the woods following the tracks left by a wounded animal. The cicadas and other insects sounded all around him with their daily chorus. With any luck he could find a deer that had recently died so everyone could finally eat something. After a couple more minutes he discovered the end of the trail. The archer dropped to his knees and dropped his crossbow to the ground. He had found the animal.

The animal had been a deer. It was unclear what had killed it but what was clear was that the corpse had already been ravaged upon. The spinal column was showing as there was no flesh left on that part of the body. Daryl turned his head and found the body of a walker slumped against a tree with a hole in its head.

Daryl looked back at the corpse. It was still relatively fresh. Was it worth the risk to satisfy his overpowering hunger? The hunger they all felt? His rational side kicked in, however, and reminded him that it was a corpse that a walker had fed on. It wasn’t an option. He stood back up and headed back towards the group.

When he returned to the group they were sitting relatively close together by the roadside. Upon his return, Jason released Carl from the embrace he had him in and slowly walked over to him, still lethargic from not having eaten. Daryl eyed him with curiosity as no one else had moved.

“You smoke, right?” Jason asked him with a weak smile.

“Yeah.” Daryl answered gruffly.

Jason pulled out the half empty pack of cigarettes and handed them to the archer. “Found them in one of the cars.”

Daryl reluctantly took the pack and stuffed it into one of his pockets before walking over to sit down with the group. As was his habit, he sat on the side-lines and made sure his crossbow and its arrows were in good condition.

Jason sat back down with Carl and wrapped his arms around the boy’s waist from behind as he leaned his back against a tree. Carl leaned back against Jason’s chest as they all listened to the silence of the woodland. Carl cradled Judith in his arms and let her get what little sleep she could.  They were fortunate to not have to deal with any more walkers for the time being.

Above their heads, thunder roared in the distant skies. Abraham pulled out a small bottle of whiskey, one of the only things he had found when searching the cars. He opened the bottle and gave it a sniff before drinking some.

“So all we found was booze?” Tara asked aloud.

“Yep.” Rosita answered in disappointment.

Tara saw that Abraham was drinking the alcohol. “It’s not gonna help.”

“He knows that.” Rosita told her with a sigh.

“It’s gonna make it worse.” Tara continued.

“Yes it is.” Rosita agreed.

“He’s a grown man.” Eugene interrupted. “And I truly do not know if things can get worse.”

After a pause for thought, Rosita answered him. “They can.”

As silence fell upon the group once more, a sudden growl caused them all to look across the road at the tree line. Everyone kept their attention focused as some bushes rustled before four dirty, scarred dogs walked onto the road, growling, snarling and barking aggressively.

Daryl instinctively took out his knife and stayed low. Rick also stayed low and slowly withdrew his machete. Jason moved so that Carl was behind him and also pulled out his machete. Their bodies shook as adrenaline shot through them. Dogs would be much harder to deal with than walkers were. They would need to be quick and precise to avoid any injuries.

Just as the dogs were about to pounce four silenced shots erupted from the left side of the group. Splatters of blood hit the tarmac as each of the dogs dropped dead one after another. The group turned to see Sasha standing with his rifle aimed in her hands. They all took a breath as the adrenaline was quickly filtered out of their systems.

Rick was annoyed that Sasha had wasted four bullets on dogs that they could have killed with their knives. Before he could voice that annoyance realisation dawned on him. They were all hungry and they had four dead dogs in front of them. He stood up and made his way to the treeline behind them to pick up a large stick. He started breaking parts off of it. The others knew what he was thinking. They were going to eat the dogs.

Half an hour later Daryl had skinned the dogs and they had built a couple small fires. They used sticks to hold the pieces of dog meat over the flames to cook them before eating them. It wasn’t the best way to cook the meat, leaving it chewy but more than edible. Most of them were simply too hungry to care about the taste or texture. Food was food and they were starving.

Carl was keeping a very close eye on Jason while Rick took care of Judith. Carl was making sure Jason not only ate the dog meat but ate a lot of it to make up for four days without any food at all. Jason struggled as his stomach wasn’t used to the sudden volume of contents being thrown into it but he did as he was told and continued to eat. He was starving so he didn’t really need to be forced but he didn’t say anything. Jason knew it gave Carl a sense of satisfaction to be in control.

“This must be hard for you.” Carl commented lowly. “You used to save animals.”

Jason shrugged as he swallowed down some more meat. “We need to eat though.”

“Yeah but…” Carl trailed off, not sure what to say as he hadn’t expected Jason to be blaze about it.

“We’re supposed to eat meat as part of our diet.” Jason told him with a soft smile. “In nature there are predators and there is prey. Simple.”

The only person who refused to eat the dog meat was Noah. He sat in the road, not having moved from his previous position, staring at the collar of one of the dogs. Duke. That had been someone’s pet. A beloved canine family member who had managed to escape a fate its human family probably did not. It had survived all this time with other dogs only to get gunned down by the first living people it had seen in a while. They were eating someone’s pet. They were eating Duke.

Sasha returned to the group after gathering more wood and stared down at Noah. The teenager looked back up at her and thought for a moment before speaking.

“Your brother, he tried to help me.” Noah told her before taking a breath. “I don’t know if I’m going to make it.”

Sasha stared down at him sternly. They had no time for doubts. “Then you won’t.”

Noah went silent. He hadn’t expected the woman to tell him that his days were most likely numbered. Sasha realised he hadn’t eaten and kept staring at the collar.

“Don’t think. Just eat.” She told him before returning to the group.

As they all sat together and continued to eat the dog meat, Gabriel stared into the fire while deep in thought. Perhaps Jason had a point. The world had ended, millions of people had died and become walkers. They were living on the road with nowhere to go, always fighting for survival and there had been no sign of any divine intervention. God either didn’t exist or he simply didn’t care. It was time to let go.

Maggie watched in surprise as Gabriel pulled out the white tag of his collar and tossed it into the fire. He had just abandoned his faith right in front of her after stubbornly holding onto it all this time. Perhaps there was hope for everyone, including him.

 

The sunlight continued to stream through the gaps in the trees above as the group continued walking down the dirty, silent road. The dogs had satisfied their hunger for the time being but they were still very low on water and the heat from the sun continued to dry them out more and more. They needed to find water before they started collapsing from dehydration. In an attempt to conserve water and energy, they walked slowly. They didn’t have a destination so they weren’t in a rush.

Glenn turned to Maggie and held out a bottle of water to her. It was nearly empty. “Here, you take a drink.”

“No.” Maggie answered quietly.

“Okay. How about you just talk to me?” Glenn suggested. He wasn’t going to let his wife go through her emotional pain alone.

“I never thought she was alive. I just didn’t. After daddy, I don’t know, if I couldn’t.” Maggie explained, referring to Beth. “And then after what Daryl said, I hoped she was out there alive. Then finding out that she was then she wasn’t on the same day.”

Glenn listened closely. It broke his heart to hear the pain Maggie was going through and to see it on her face. He had to be there for her to keep her safe and to keep her strong.

“Seeing her like that it made it feel like none of it was really ever there.” Maggie continued, her voice cracking. “Before this was just the dark part…I don’t know if I wanna fight it anymore.”

Glenn closed the gap between them to comfort her. He couldn’t believe that someone as strong as Maggie was actually considering giving up. He believed it to be the grief talking though he understood why she felt that way. They all had thoughts of giving up floating across their minds from time to time.

“You do. You do. That’s who you are.” Glenn told her. “And maybe it’s a curse nowadays but I don’t think so. We fought to be here and we have to keep fighting.”

Maggie nodded as he spoke. He was getting through to her so he passed the bottle to her again.

“Drink.” He told her.

Maggie did as she was told and took a sip of water from the almost empty bottle.

Behind them, Abraham held out the bottle of whiskey to Sasha who shook her head. The last thing she needed was alcohol.

“That’ll just make things worse.” She told him.

“The way you’re going.” Abraham commented, not forgetting the slash to his arm. “You’re gonna things worse.”

Sasha considered the comment. She was focused on survival, she was focused on not making the same mistakes her brother did that winded up getting him and others killed. How dare Abraham tell her that she’s the problem!

“Hey, you’re with friends.” Abraham reminded her.

Sasha glared back at him angrily. “We’re not friends.”

As she marched ahead, Abraham shrugged and took another sip of alcohol. He turned to Jason and Carl who were walking near him and offered the bottle to Jason.

“I can’t.” Jason told him, shaking his head.

“Why not?” Abraham asked him with a smirk. “You still underage?”

“I’ve got a lot of bad memories thanks to alcohol.” Jason told him honestly. “I refuse to even consider it.”

“Can’t be any worse than the memories of all this.” Abraham remarked with a shrug before taking another swig.

“No but they’re a part of me.” Jason explained. “It’s just the way it is.”

As they walked down the road they noticed several dead walker corpses lying on the side-lines. It appeared someone had already came through fairly recently and killed them. The group didn’t let it concern them, there were a lot of them and they all had guns. No one would stand up to that.

Glenn held out the bottle of water to Daryl. “Daryl.”

“Nah, I’m good.” Daryl answered.

Glenn held it out again, his voice more firm. “Daryl.”

“Don’t.” Daryl told him. He didn’t need to drink.

“Hey, we can make it together.” Glenn told him, knowing that despair was setting in. “But we can only make it together.”

Glenn pressed on ahead as Daryl slowed to a stop. He needed time to think. He needed time to be alone.

He turned to Abraham. “Tell them I was out looking for water.”

With that, he disappeared into the foliage once again.

“Jason?” Carl asked, looking up at the taller teen from under his hat.

“Yeah?” Jason answered, staring back into his lover’s eyes.

“Why did you do it?” Carl asked somewhat cryptically.

“Do what?” Jason asked, confused for a moment.

“Starve yourself.” Carl explained with a sigh. “I know you were taking care of me but why do that?”

Jason thought for a moment and shrugged. He wasn’t totally sure why he had ended up starving himself for four days. It had been careless and he had almost got them killed as a result. It was certainly not a mistake that he would repeat any time soon.

“I guess love can make you do stupid things.” Jason told him and took hold of Carl’s hand.

Carl lowered his gaze but squeezed Jason’s hand. “Don’t hurt yourself again, for me.”

“I won’t.” Jason replied. It was a promise he knew he couldn’t keep.

 

Daryl walked through the woods and came out onto a small clearing. The clearing looked to be a dirt road that lead down to an old wooden barn. He sat down in the shade with his back against a tree trunk and searched in his pocket for the cigarette packet that Jason had given him. He pulled out one of the cigarettes, stuck it in his mouth and lit the tip with his silver lighter.

Daryl pocketed his lighter and took several long puffs of the cigarette, letting the nicotine that shot through his system relax him. There was something very relaxing about having a cigarette every month or so in the apocalypse. It was a special treat, a luxury that had to be saved for the best moments.

He thought about what Carol had said. He needed to feel his emotional pain, he needed to release it so that it didn’t destroy him on the inside. Unfortunately, Daryl found it difficult to express his feelings as he had been brought up in an environment that forced him to bottle them up. One form of pain he could express was physical. He took the cigarette and put it out on his hand, the fiery tip burning the flesh as he winced at the sharp pain of it.

He dropped the cigarette to the ground and moved his hand repeatedly in an attempt to increase the pain from the burn. It worked and as a result of the physical pain he thought about Beth, the pain she had been through because he hadn’t been able to save her. All the grief and regret and guilt came flooding out of him from deep inside his heart as he lowered his head and let himself cry. Daryl was so sincerely sorry that Beth wasn’t there with them like she was supposed to be.

 

It had been fifteen minutes since Daryl had separated from the group and as they walked further along the long road they spotted something sitting in the middle of it. As they group approached with caution and curiosity they discovered that the object in the road was in fact a collection of water bottles, all of them full. On top of the pile was a piece of paper with something written on it. Rick was the first to read it.

FROM A FRIEND

Rick turned back to the others and gestured for everyone to be on their guard. They scanned the surrounding treeline but couldn’t find any signs of people. Someone had obviously left the water from them which meant they weren’t alone. Someone was watching them. Their minds were cast back to the cannibals from Terminus watching them in the woods.

After a few more minutes of scanning and checking, it was clear that they weren’t being ambushed right away. They formed a circle around the water bottles. As dangerous as the situation was, they were all very dehydrated and needed the water. Jason instinctively stayed close to Carl who was holding onto Judith protectively.

The sound of rustling bushes caught their attention, causing them all to turn their heads towards the source. Daryl emerged from the treeline and looked at them with a hint of confusion, especially when he spotted the water bottles. Everyone stayed still except for Rick who walked up to Daryl and handed him the note.

Daryl, like the rest of them, immediately held his crossbow at the ready. He was now alert and was scanning their surroundings like the group had just done. There was silence apart from the odd bird or cicada.

“What else are we gonna do?” Tara asked aloud. They needed water and it was sitting in front of them.

“Not this.” Rick told her, looking around. “We don’t know who left it.”

“If that’s a trap we already happen to be in it.” Eugene commented, staring at the bottles. “But I for one would like to believe that it is indeed from a friend.”

“What if it isn’t?” Carol suggested. “What if they put something in it?”

“Couldn’t we boil it off?” Jason spoke up. Boiling the water would probably get rid of any foreign substance if any were present.

“It would take too long.” Rick countered. “They could be on top of us by then.”

Eugene quickly stepped forward and picked up one of the bottles. He unscrewed the lid.

“Eugene! What are you doing, dude?” Rosita asked him in surprise.

“Quality insurance.” Eugene answered and raised the bottle to his lips.

Abraham suddenly rushed forward and slapped the bottle out of Eugene’s hand, causing some of it to splash over his face as he jumped from the sudden movement. The bottle hit the ground and skidded along it, spilling more water as it went. Eugene glared at Abraham who glared right back.

“We can’t.” Rick told him sternly.

The skies above them started roaring with thunder. The crashes and grumbles of the thunder continued to get louder and more frequent, making the group turn their attention to the clouds above.

That’s when they heard it. The faint sound of water droplets hitting the tarmac and the leaves of the trees. Then they felt the droplets on their heads, faces and bodies. The rain had finally came. The thunder roared louder across the sky as the rain got heavier as the group below it started smiling. After so long with nothing but heat and sweltering sunshine, they finally had rain. They held out their arms and tilted their faces to the sky, opening their mouths to catch the rainwater as they basked in the refreshing sensation of having water on their skin.

The rain continued to get heavier until it was a torrential downpour. Rosita and Tara lay on their backs on the road and let the rainwater soak their entire bodies as the giggled with joyous relief. Maggie, Sasha and Daryl didn’t appear to find any relief with the rain and almost seemed irritated by it.

“I’m sorry my Lord.” Gabriel cried to the sky with regret.

“Everybody, get the bottles in the bags.” Rick commanded, helping Abraham retrieve containers from one of the bags. “Anything you can find. Come on!”

The torrential downpour continued to batter them almost painfully as the thunder crashed violently above them. The group scrambled to put out containers and bottles to catch the rain. Judith started crying, not a fan of the rain so Carl held his hat over her head. Jason took off his backpack so he could take off his jacket. He wrapped the leather jacket around Judith’s body.

“Leather’s waterproof.” Jason explained when Carl gave him a questioning glance.

Jason couldn’t help but smile as he felt the rainwater soak through his black top and onto his skin. The rain itself was warm and the humidity level was so high that breathing was a little harder than usual. He couldn’t complain however, they finally had water.

The thunder continued to constantly crash louder and louder. Observing the clouds, Rick could see them twisting and turning slowly as they darkened more. A ferocious storm was forming and they couldn’t afford to be nearby when it hit. The thunder could also cause the walkers to start moving in odd directions.

“Let’s keep moving!” Rick shouted to them as Judith continued to cry in fear of the thunder.

“There’s a barn!” Daryl shouted back, remembering the wooden barn he saw earlier.

“Where?” Rick yelled back over the thunder. They needed to find cover.

 

The journey to the barn that Daryl had told them about only took five minutes. In that five minutes they had all ended up soaked to the bone from the torrential rain that continued to fall from the dark clouds above. The thunder was relentless as it echoed violently around them with frighteningly loud crashes and roars. Rick opened the barn door and stepped inside, the beam of light from his flashlight following the aim of his revolver as he quickly scanned the interior for any threats.

He paced further inside, keeping his gun aimed at all times with Carol, Abraham, Glenn and Maggie behind him, all with their guns aimed and ready. It was much quieter inside the barn as the thick wooden roof kept the deafening noise of the rain to a minimum. One thing they instantly noticed upon entering the barn was the stench of death. There was a walker inside it somewhere but it hadn’t come it nor could it be seen.

After glancing at the others who were queued up outside in the rain, Maggie opened the door to a small supply room. In the supply room, surrounded by empty food cans and water bottles was the walker of an older woman. The rifle she had used when alive was propped up against the window. The walker snarled as it crawled towards Maggie. Her emaciated body showed that she had starved to death. Maggie pulled out her knife and stabbed it in the forehead as soon as it got close enough. She stared at the rifle as Carol approached from behind.

“She had a gun.” Carol pointed out.

“She could have shot herself.” Maggie commented.

“Some people can’t give up.” Carol told her. “Like us.”

Satisfied that there were no other walkers in the barn, Carol gestured to the others that it was okay to enter. They all quickly filed into the barn having started to grow sick of the rain pounding down on them. They spread themselves out around the barn while Rick got to work lighting a fire in that back right corner.

As they made their way across the barn to where Rick was, Carl yawned with his eyes tightly shut as he held onto his baby sister. Jason smiled and took a moment to steal a look at Carl. He couldn’t help but notice how the rain had made Carl’s wet clothes cling tightly to his body making them more revealing than they were when dry. Seeing the shape of Carl’s body without getting to see it was enough for his imagination to get excited about. He shook his head gently and forced the thoughts from his mind. They weren’t in the best place for that.

“You tired?” Jason asked the younger teen, preferring to focus on conversation.

Carl nodded. “Yeah, it’s been a long day.”

Jason nodded in agreement. “Well, I’m pretty sure it’ll be safe to sleep here for the night.”

Carl nodded with a smile as they sat down by the fire that Rick had finally lit. Jason sat down first with his back against the wall and spread his legs so that Carl could lean back against his chest. Carl removed Jason’s jacket from Judith and handed it back to him. The older teen placed his jacket on the floor beside them so that it could be used as a cover later.

The two of them smiled weakly as Glenn, Michonne, Carol and Daryl decided to join them by the fire with Rick. The rain continued to pelt the roof of the barn and the ground outside as the thunder echoed in the skies above. A sudden flash of bright light through the cracks in the wood revealed that it was a lightning storm outside and the loud whistles of strong winds told them that the storm was going to get worse before it got better.

Ten minutes later and Carl had already fallen asleep on Jason, his head rested against Jason’s chest as if it were a pillow. His face was turned away from the fire as was most of his body as he unconsciously snuggled closer to the older teen. Judith was also asleep and held closely and securely in Carl’s sleeping arms while Jason had draped his jacket over Carl’s sleeping form.

Most of the others were scattered around the barn. Maggie slept at a distance from everyone else and with her back to the others. Abraham sat in a corner and finished his whiskey. Sasha and Noah also were sat separate from the others and from each other.

Daryl threw a couple more sticks into the fire but they didn’t seem to do anything so he sat back down. Glenn picked up a couple sticks.

“I’ll try.” He told them quietly.

“Nah, they’re too wet.” Daryl informed him. The rain still seeped through the gaps in the wood.

Rick turned his head to keep an eye on his sleeping children. His eyes met with Jason’s as Carl remained against him, sleeping soundly. Jason smiled softly at Rick.

“Thank you.” Rick said lowly.

“For what?” Jason questioned.

“You never let them out of your sight.” Rick explained.

“I made you a promise, Rick.” Jason replied with a smile as he leaned his head back. “Besides, I love him. You know that. You all do.”

Rick nodded slowly while the others remained silent. “I know.”

“You’re both strong, like Glenn and Maggie.” Carol commented. “So you can enjoy it because it can last.”

“Carl needed someone.” Michonne remarked quietly. “He found you.”

Jason nodded with an amused smile. “I think he found me, really.”

He knew the others didn’t understand what he truly meant by that remark. He had been on the road for so long and was so damaged by what had happened to him that he had been on the verge of giving up. Despite his promise to Kellin, he had been growing more and more desperate and would have inevitably died. The more he thought about it, the more he realised he would have either ran into those violent marauders or been barbequed at Terminus. Carl prevented all of that by somehow bringing his old self back to life. He would forever owe him for that.

Rick continued to stare at his sleeping son. He had tried everything he could to keep him safe and up until now had managed that. However, Rick knew that his luck would eventually run out and either something awful would happen or the nature of the world would destroy the good boy his son was and the good man he knew he would become.

Somehow, Carol seemed to hear Rick’s thoughts. “He’s gonna be okay. He bounces back more than any of us do.”

“I used to feel sorry for kids that had to grow up now, in this.” Rick began. “But I think I got it wrong. Growing up is getting used to the world. This is easier for them.”

They all lowered their gaze slightly. As awful as it was and as sad as it was, it was also true. The youth of the apocalypse would be the ones best adapted to survival. Jason knew that he too fell into that category but only just. Had the walkers appeared a couple years later he would have struggled just as much as Rick and the others. He probably would have gone insane by now, if he lived that long.

“This isn’t the world.” Michonne argued as thunder crashed outside. “This isn’t it.”

Glenn looked over to check on Maggie before turning back to the fire. “It might be. It might.”

“That’s giving up.” Michonne countered.

“That’s reality.” Glenn retorted quickly.

“Until we see otherwise, this is what we have to live with.” Rick told her gruffly.

The wind howled outside as the rain kept pelting the roof. The thunder crashed just as loudly as ever and lightning flashed every few seconds. Silence fell inside the barn as it began to sink in that what they were experiencing was life in the apocalypse. It was possible that no alternatives, no better places existed.

“When I was a kid, I asked my grandpa once if he ever killed any Germans in the war.” Rick started, breaking the silence. “He wouldn’t answer, said that was grown up’s stuff so I asked if the Germans ever tried to kill him but he got real quiet.”

All of them listened to him closely. Carl fidgeted in his sleep slightly, prompting Jason to stroke his head gently to sooth him while he listened to Rick’s story.

“He said he was dead the minute he stepped into enemy territory.” Rick continued. “Every day he woke up he told himself; “Rest in peace, now get up and go to war.” And then after a few years of pretending he was dead, he made it out alive.”

The others either watched him as he spoke or gazed into the fire.

“That’s the trick of it, I think. We do what we need to do and then we get to live.” Rick explained. “But no matter what we find in DC, I know we’ll be okay. Because this is how we survive.”

Jason narrowed his eyes as he listened to Rick. The man was filled with a strange level of confidence given the desperate nature of their situation. It was fascinating to see how strong Carl’s father truly was.

“We tell ourselves that we are the walking dead.” Rick finished firmly.

All of them shared glances. The walking dead was literally what the walkers were. Jason knew that it was meant metaphorically but even in that sense it wasn’t any less upsetting an idea. Jason had been there before, he had been dead for months because of Kellin’s death. He had simply wandered from place to place much like the walkers did until he met Carl. The idea of going back to being like that, to shutting himself down in such a cold way wasn’t something he wanted to contemplate.

“We ain’t them.” Daryl spoke up, referring to the walkers.

Rick leaned forward, believing Daryl to have misunderstood him. “We’re not them. Hey, we’re not.”

“We ain’t them.” Daryl repeated before standing up, grabbing his crossbow and heading for the barn door.

They watched him walk away before Jason spoke up again. “It’s not something we want to be.”

“It’s what we need to be.” Rick argued.

“I’ve been there, Rick.” Jason replied with a sigh. “Only difference between me and the walkers was on the outside. I was dead inside.”

Rick and the others fell silent, unsure of what to say to Jason’s comments.

“If we shut ourselves down then we’re getting rid of the only thing that separates us from them.” Jason finished. “That way we just become wild animals instead of people.”

Daryl paced by the barn door. They had used a chain to keep it locked but the high winds caused the doors to swing back and forth, the hinges whining loudly and the chains rattling even louder. The rain was still pelting down while the lighting illuminated everything in brief flashes followed by aggressive thunder. As he paced, something caught his attention. It was faint but he could definitely smell the all too familiar stench of decay.

He placed his crossbow against one of the support beams and peered out the gap between the doors as they swung back and forth violently. Adrenaline shot through him as he took in the sight outside. A huge herd of walkers, easily over forty of them, were slowly shuffling towards the barn door, snarling as they did so. Daryl immediately pushed the doors shut and fought to tighten the chain before the corpses reached the other side of the door. The others couldn’t hear him because of the combined noise of rain and thunder.

Daryl managed to get the chain tightened and put his back against the door just as the walkers started banging and slamming against it. With each slam of a walker’s weight against the door, coupled with the high winds, the doors burst inward despite Daryl’s best efforts to hold them shut. He wasn’t strong enough to fight forty walkers and Mother Nature at the same time. Fortunately, Maggie heard the banging and sat up to see the archer struggling. She quickly made her way over to help push the door shut and keep it that way.

Unfortunately the two of them had no chance of holding the herd at bay for very long. Sasha looked over as the banging of the doors and rattling of the chains reached her ears as well. As soon as she saw the two of them struggling she too rushed over to help hold the doors shut. The whole herd knew that there was prey on the other side and started pushing against the doors more than before.

The combined sounds of the banging of the doors, rattling of the chains, grunts of effort from Daryl, Maggie and Sasha, the snarls of the walkers and the deafening howls of the wind alerted Rick and the others to what was happening. Rick, Glenn, Carol and Michonne all rushed towards the door, quickly followed by Abraham, Rosita and Tara.

Carl was also woken by the commotion and looked around to see them piling themselves against the door. Jason studied the scene for a moment to try to understand what was going on. Lightning flashed and illuminated the outlines of the walkers on the other side.

“Aw hell!” Jason cursed and pushed Carl off of him. “You stay with Judith!”

Before Carl could answer, Jason ran over to the doors at the same time as Eugene joined the effort. All of them stood their ground and tried to pile their weight against the doors to keep out the howling winds and snarling monsters. Noah and Gabriel were the last ones to join in the effort. The doors continued to jump inward as their feet slid on the muddy floor of the barn. Water came pouring in from the gaps the struggle was creating.

The lightning flashed more frequently, the thunder crashed even louder and the winds screamed as they increased in force. The storm was spiralling out of control and from the few flashes of light that the lightning granted them, Jason could see why. In the distance, the dark clouds had twisted and touched down in the form of a tornado. The group was fighting against a herd of starving cadavers and one of the most destructive natural phenomenon known.

Carl watched as they struggled with the doors, fighting a losing battle against the corpses on the other side. The noise of the storm was painfully loud. He wouldn’t just stand back with Judith while the others fought for their lives against all odds. Despite the baby’s defiant cries of protest, Carl lay her down on the ground and ran for the door, slotting himself in beside Jason as the entire group pushed against the large wooden doors

“I thought I told you to stay with Judith!” Jason bellowed, barely audible over the screaming gusts.

“If these doors open we’ll all die anyway!” Carl argued as he roared with physical strain.

Despite the entire group using all of their physical strength to hold the doors shut, the walkers on the other side had Mother Nature on their side. The hundred mile an hour winds were pushing the doors open with ease as everyone screamed, roared and shouted in desperation and panic. They all knew if the doors opened or broke then they would all die, there would be no escaping the herd.

The winds intensified even more as did the thunder, rain and lightning. It was as if with each passing second every aspect of the storm became more and more powerful. The sharp sound of trees snapping along with the dull bangs of trees collapsing to the ground reminded them that even if they could fend off the walkers the tornado could still kill them all.

Unknown volumes of adrenaline shot through their blood as they fought with all the strength they could muster and then some to keep the doors shut. They all knew they were probably experiencing their final moments, either the walkers or the tornado would claim their lives or perhaps a combination of the two. It was a waiting game played with death itself.

Rick’s thoughts were on his children and the people around him who he considered family. He had promised himself that he would keep them all safe. He would do whatever needed to be done to ensure their survival. Rick had fought to keep Carl alive and was determined to keep Judith alive as she was all that truly remained of Lori. He hadn’t been able to save his marriage but he was capable of saving his family. He had to be.

Abraham’s thoughts were also on his loved ones. After his wife and kids were killed by walkers he had wanted to kill himself but Eugene’s arrival in his life had changed that. Even though Eugene had lied, he had lead Abraham to his lover, Rosita. He would always be grateful for that and he would always keep her safe. Always.

Michonne refused to let this be the end. This was her family now, her boyfriend and son long since gone. Rick, Carl and the others were her family. She wouldn’t let them die out in this hellish nightmare. This wasn’t the world. Michonne refused to die here.

Sasha fought against the door with all the rage she had for the walkers. They had taken her parents, her friends, her boyfriend and her brother. They had taken everything from her and she wouldn’t let them take anything else. She hated those rotting monsters and she would not lose to them like her brother did. She would not let them win.

Glenn cursed as his feet slid on the mud. They had gone through so much, they had all survived so many horrendous situations. They should have all died several times over by now. He couldn’t accept that this storm or the walkers would be the end for them. He wouldn’t lose his family in that barn. He wouldn’t lose Maggie in that barn. Glenn would keep her safe no matter the cost.

Maggie had doubted if she wanted to live in the apocalypse anymore. Day after day of the same loneliness, misery and fear. Yet confronted with the possibility of dying in that barn during that tremendous storm at the hands of those terrifying creatures, she fought harder than she ever had before. Her time to die would come but it wasn’t at that moment.

Daryl was sick of losing people to the cruelty of the world. If not for the family he had around him he would be alone. The people he loved were always the ones to die first, always leaving him behind. His mother. His brother, Merle and even Beth. All of them gone while he still stood tall, ever the survivor. Daryl didn’t want to be alone and he didn’t want to lose the family he had around him. Despite the ache in his muscles, he pushed against the doors even harder. They would not die there.

Gabriel pushed all his weight against the door. If this was punishment for attempting to abandon God then he had learned his lesson. He repeatedly prayed for divine intervention. He would never abandon his faith again. He would atone for his sins. He prayed and prayed and prayed.

Carl pushed against the doors with all his strength. He wasn’t sure how much help he actually was given he was the smallest of the group but he had to try. Despite the desperate situation they were in when travelling on the road, he had everything he needed in life. He had friends he could trust. His father was still alive and with him every day. His baby sister was still with them and he loved her more than he ever thought he could love anyone. Last but not least, he had Jason. The guy who had come into his life after it fell apart and had helped to put it all back together again. Carl couldn’t live without any of them and he would die trying to protect each and every single one of them.

Apart from the people in that barn with him, Jason had lost every single person he had ever known. His family was gone and his best friends were gone. Even Kellin, the one person he had sworn to protect until the end of time itself had died. He had lost everything but had always continued to fight. It was because of that fighting spirit that Jason had happened upon Carl, the boy who would turn his life around. For the first time since the apocalypse began, he felt a strong sense of belonging. He was part of a family. He was as important to them as they were to him. Jason swore he would not repeat the mistakes of the past, he would not let his new family suffer the same fate as his old family. He would not see Carl die like he had seen Kellin die. Jason would fight until the day he died before he let anyone else die around him.

As they all felt their bodies start to give in from exertion as the adrenaline could only do so much, the storm suddenly became wilder. The rain hammered down loudly. The lightning flashed blindingly bright. The thunder crashed deafeningly loud around them. The winds howled and screamed as the tornado finally reached them. Trees bent, snapped and broke like mere twigs under the force of the winds as they came crashing down to the ground all around them. Wooden panels on the roof of the barn were stripped away as the doors shook extremely violently, pushing everyone off balance as the walkers were lifted into the air. The walkers were too stupid to see the danger and remained focus on the door as the twister sucked them up into the sky.

“Everyone get to the back of the barn now!” Jason bellowed as loudly as his lungs and vocal chords would allow him to.

He spun round and grabbed hold of Carl, pulling him away from the door of the barn towards the back wall. The rest of the group also scattered as far away from the door as possible. When they did, the doors pounded back and forth, the chain rattling explosively round the handles as the entire barn itself shook violently under the force of the twister raging outside. Rick darted for Judith, scooping her up in his arms before dropping to the floor to shield her from whatever came next. Abraham grabbed onto Rosita. Glenn grabbed hold of Maggie. Daryl grabbed Carol. Jason held Carl as close to him as possible as the storm raged outside causing the barn to shake and groan loudly under the strain. They closed their eyes and waited for the end.

 

Maggie awoke on the floor of the barn. Glenn was asleep behind her and in front of her Rick lay fast asleep on his side. Judith was still tucked tightly in his arms and was awake, staring back at her sweetly. She couldn’t help but smile back at the baby’s cute little face. She slowly sat up and looked around. The barn was still standing and everyone was spread out across the floor asleep. Next to Rick, Jason and Carl were cuddled together with Jason’s leather jacket over the top of them. It was very quiet. Peaceful.

She stood up and spotted Daryl sitting at the back of the barn. He had stayed up all night to keep watch and keep the group safe. They made eye contact so she made her way over to him before sitting down next to him.

“You should get some sleep.” She told him quietly.

Daryl nodded. “Yeah…”

“It’s okay to rest now.” Maggie told him.

Daryl looked past Maggie to Sasha who lay sleeping against the wall. Maggie followed his gaze as they thought about their friend. Maggie was still struggling with the loss of Beth, as was Daryl yet it was Sasha who had the freshest wounds.

“He was tough.” Daryl commented, referring to Tyreese.

“He was.” Maggie agreed lowly.

“So was she.” Daryl added, referring to Beth with a small smile. “She didn’t know it, but she was.”

Maggie smiled back for a moment but her smile quickly faded. It was still too painful. Daryl reached over to his right side and lifted up the music box, handing it back to Maggie.

“Gearbox had some grit in it.” Daryl explained why it hadn’t been working.

Maggie couldn’t help but smile at the gesture. “Thank you.”

The two of them shared a smile before Maggie stood up and made her way over to Sasha. Daryl lowered his body to the floor and curled up for some much needed sleep, relieved that he could finally relax.

Maggie placed her hand on Sasha’s shoulder and pushed it gently, waking the woman who looked up at her in confusion.

“Come on.” Maggie told her with a smile, earning an even more confused look from Sasha.

They quietly made their way out of the barn, being very careful not to wake anyone and closed the door behind them. It was at that moment they were able to see the true extent of the damage that the storm had caused. Trees had been broken in half, others had been completely uprooted. Debris was strewn about everywhere and the ground was still dark and moist from the rain. Body parts belonging to walkers littered the area as did the walkers themselves. All the walkers that could be seen were either pinned under fallen trees, impaled into the ground by branches, too broken and mangled to move or were hanging from the branches of the trees that had survived the storm.

As they started carefully moving amongst the debris and chaos, Maggie held her knife at the ready while Sasha kept her finger on the trigger of her rifle.

“Look at this.” Sasha commented in amazement. “Should have torn us apart.”

“It didn’t.” Maggie replied as she made her way past a walker who was pinned to the ground.

After plenty of careful steps and some brisk walking, the pair of women had made it past all of the destruction to the top of a small hill. They sat down on a fallen tree trunk and looked out at the beautiful, flowering field in front of them. On the horizon, the sun was just beginning to rise.

“Why are we here?” Sasha asked, curious.

“For this.” Maggie answered, looking at the sunrise and admiring the colours it cast into the sky.

“I see it.” Sasha replied, emotions bubbling to the surface. “Noah, that kid, he said he didn’t know if he can make it. That’s how I feel.”

Maggie’s face contorted with the same emotions. They both felt alone and desperate.

“You’re gonna make it.” Maggie finally answered, her voice weak. “Both of us, we will. That’s the hard part.”

Both of them had tears stinging their eyes. They were still alive and they still had their extended family. They could still keep fighting. Maggie held the music box in both hands and prepared to open it.

“Daryl fixed it.” She informed Sasha.

She opened the lid of the music box, observing the little ballerina that popped up as she wound up the mechanism at the back of it. There was silence. Then a sudden click. Then more silence.

Maggie sighed in exasperation. “You’ve gotta be kidding me.”

She let out a small laugh that she shared with Sasha as she placed it down on the log they were sitting on.

“Hey.” A voice called from their right.

Both women jumped to their feet and drew their weapons, Sasha with her pistol and Maggie with her revolver. Standing in the long grass before them was a clean shaven man with short hair, clean clothes and a backpack. He raised his hands as soon as they raised their weapons.

“Hi…I…I didn’t mean to interrupt.” The man continued. “Good morning. My name is Aaron.”

The two of them kept their guns aimed at him.

“I know, it’s, uh, stranger danger but, um, I’m a friend.” Aaron explained as he stepped closer. “I’d like to talk to the person in charge, Rick, right?”

“How do you know?” Maggie asked, perplexed.

“Why?” Sasha also asked, equally perplexed.

“I have good news.” Aaron answered with a smile.

As if on cue, the music box finally started to play with the little ballerina spinning round slowly.

 

**Woot! Another chapter complete. This one was a lot more fun to write than the previous one. At the moment I’m sticking very close to the episodes but once we hit Alexandria in chapter 18 and onwards, I’ll be able to have much more freedom for Jason/Carl moments.**

**This one took a little longer to write than planned simply because life gets in the way of these things. So, sorry about that. Kudos to whoever finds the Easter Egg in this chapter.**

**Thanks again for all the follows/alerts/subscriptions/bookmarks/favourites/votes/kudos etc.**

**Also thanks to the** **reviewers for chapter 15: kingcarlgrimes, The_Man_Called_Madara, sara, Chancey, kgbufo, christian77611, rk0192, SundayAL, Youngblooded, Okamidenama, DarkScribe81, angelicdamnation and emilyymjoness.**

**There’s just one silly thing left to say; Vegeta, what does the scouter say about the total view count for this fanfiction?**

**IT’S OVER 9000!!**

**Thanks to the combined readers of Fanfiction.net, Archive Of Our Own & Wattpad.**

**As usual, please leave a review/comment to let me know what you think. The more comments/reviews I get, the faster I tend to update. :P**


	17. Trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The stranger, Aaron, promises the paradise of a safe community where the group can live. The prospect of Jason's dreams for him and Carl being true is very inviting, but is Aaron telling the truth? Can Rick be convinced?

_The birds chirped in the branches above them as the sunlight streamed down through the gaps in the tree canopy. Twigs snapped beneath their feet and loose bits of bark cracked and crumbled under their weight. Jason kept his hand rested on the handle of his holstered gun as he and Kellin walked through the woods. There was no sign of the undead or any other people, something they were grateful for after witnessing what the military had done._

_The air was thick with humidity and the temperature was high, making Jason’s bomber jacket and Kellin’s blue hoodie their mortal enemies for the time being. They kept the garments on as they did not want to have more exposed flesh than necessary. Jason didn’t know what they were going to do, they could keep going and scavenge for supplies but they needed a proper plan. They needed a place to stay, they needed more ammo and they needed food. As discouraged as they were, he also knew that they needed to find more people. The two of them versus a world of undead freaks did not bode well for their survival chances._

_“Jase, what’s the plan?” Kellin asked, keeping as close to him as possible._

_“Try find a place to stay before it gets dark.” Jason answered with a heavy breath._

_Before Kellin could question the plan or suggest something else, a walker stumbled out from behind some trees. It snarled as it approached them, hungry for blood. Kellin raised his Browning BDA at the approaching creature but Jason stretched out his arm and lowered the gun._

_“We need to conserve ammo.” Jason told him before he was questioned. “And gunshots will attract more.”_

_“So how do we kill it?” Kellin asked, panicking as the monster edged closer._

_“I’m going to try something.” Jason remarked before stepping forward._

_Jason pulled out his knife and judged the length of the blade. It was easily long enough to go through a skull and take out the brain. He just hoped he had enough strength to make it do so. He looked up as the walker closed the distance between them. His heart pounding in his chest hard enough for him to hear it. His breathing came in short pants as adrenaline shot through him and made him shake. This would either work or it would kill him._

_The walker lunged forward and Jason side stepped it. He kicked it in the knee joint as hard as he could, a distinct snapping sound came from the joint as the monster collapsed to the ground. Once the walker was lying on its front, Jason kneeled on its back to hold it down and thrust the knife into the back of its skull as hard as he could. To his surprise, the knife shot through its head with ease and killed it instantly._

_Jason pulled the knife out and looked up at Kellin, who was still in shock having expected to see his boyfriend eaten by the walker. The younger teen let out a sigh of relief and holstered his gun before rushing up to Jason and throwing his arms around him._

_“You scared me!” Kellin told him, hugging him tightly._

_Jason returned the hug. “Sorry, but we need to use knives if it’s just a couple.”_

_“I guess you’re right.” Kellin released him, nodding and looking at the walker’s lifeless corpse._

_Jason sheathed his knife and rubbed Kellin’s back, smiling as his boyfriend gazed into his eyes. He was like a scared, lost puppy, desperately hoping to not be abandoned. Jason couldn’t help but fall in love with Kellin every single time he laid eyes on him._

_“Let’s keep moving.” Jason told him and started walking._

_No sooner had he taken a few more steps a sudden dark shape entered his vision. Something hard slammed into his forehead and knocked him off his feet and onto his back. His vision was blurred and his head was spinning with pain as he lay on the ground, dazed from the attack. Kellin, in a blind panic, whipped out his Browning BDA and aimed it at Jason’s assailant._

_Jason blinked a few times and rubbed his forehead, groaning and wincing in pain as he sat up to see what hit him. In front of the two teens stood a large man with a muscular build. He wore military combat gear and wielded a mini Galil in his hands. His hair was short and black. Behind him, two other men stood dressed in casual clothes, one with an Ithaca 37 shotgun and the other with a Glock 19 handgun. The leader in the combat gear aimed his assault rifle at the two teens. Jason, without thinking, scrambled to his feet and stood between the guns and Kellin. He would die before he let them shoot his boyfriend._

_“Keep your hands where we can see them.” The soldier demanded with a Hispanic accent._

_Jason and Kellin slowly raised their arms, both of them trembling on the spot. After having witnessed the military gunning people down, they quickly assumed the same was about to happen to them._

_“Are you gonna shoot us?” Jason asked the soldier, glaring at him nervously._

_“Only if you give me a reason to.” The soldier remarked. “Sam, check them.”_

_The man with messy light brown hair carrying the Glock approached them, dressed in white trainers, slim navy blue jeans held up with a brown belt, a white T-shirt and unzipped sports jacket. Before he could reach Jason to give him a pat-down for weapons he froze in place. He and Jason both stared at each other in shock._

_“Jason?” Sam stuttered in surprise. “I thought you were dead.”_

_Jason rushed forward and wrapped his arms around his friend. He and Sam had grown up together for most of their teenage years. Jason had tried to find him when the town fell apart but had been unable to do so, regrettably he had assumed his friend to be dead and had focused on getting Kellin to safety. He had been wrong and now they were reunited._

_“You all know each other?” The Hispanic soldier questioned, lowering his weapon momentarily._

_Sam broke the hug and nodded. “Yeah, they’re both friends of mine.”_

_The soldier smiled and lowered his assault rifle completely, letting the Galil hang from the strap that was around his body. He extended his hand out to be shaken by Jason and then Kellin._

_“I’m Sergeant Carlos Olivera.” The soldier introduced himself. “I was with the military until they started shooting civilians.”_

_“We saw, we barely made it out.” Jason told him with a sigh of relief._

_Kellin shook from the memory, holding his arms as he hugged himself. “Why would they do that?”_

_Carlos sighed. “They don’t know what is causing these things to appear but they think it is a disease of some kind, so they started shooting everyone to eliminate carriers of the virus.”_

_“Let’s hope they shot them in the head.” Jason commented. “Or they’ll have just made more.”_

_Sergeant Olivera shook his head. “Only bites turn you.”_

_Jason ran his fingers through his hair and scratched his head, sharing a glance with Kellin. “I’ve got some bad news. No matter how you die, you become one of them.”_

_Carlos, Sam and the other unnamed man looked at them in disbelief._

_“We’ve seen it happen.” Kellin added._

_“Thanks for letting us know.” Carlos eventually spoke again. “We have a camp five minutes from here, you can stay with us if you like.”_

_Jason and Kellin looked at each other and nodded._

_“We’d love to.” Jason replied with a smile._

_“Then follow us back.” Carlos ordered, raising his gun again. “Stay close and keep quiet.”_

_As Carlos, Sam and the other man made their way back towards their camp, Jason stopped for a moment to hold onto Kellin’s hand. He gave Kellin’s hand a reassuring squeeze. They had made it to somewhere safe. Everything would finally be okay._

Jason’s eyes slowly fluttered open as he wakened. It took a moment for his memory to kick in and remind him of where he was. He was lying on his side on the floor of a barn, the same barn they had all nearly died in when a group of walkers attacked during the storm. His jacket was partly draped over him and facing him was Carl’s sleeping form.

Jason smiled softly as he took the time to just lie there and admire Carl. The younger boy’s eyes were closed and his face was relaxed and peaceful, as if the world around them wasn’t a nightmare. Jason assumed Carl didn’t have nightmares anymore because they lived in one instead. Most of Jason’s jacket was draped over Carl, keeping him warm and comfortable as he slept. Jason brushed some of the long hair out of Carl’s face and gently stroked his cheek with his thumb. The only word that came to his mind was cute. Carl was cute. Kellin had been cute when they first met but had lost a lot of that cuteness as he got older and became more handsome. Carl was still cute and would be for a while and Jason loved it.

Jason let his eyes follow Carl’s slim form, his body was youthful but looked firm and strong. Even through the fabric of his shirt, Jason could tell Carl’s arms were strong and mostly muscle. He was becoming a strong young man and was in fantastic shape thanks to the trials of the apocalypse. Carl’s body was something Jason wanted to see when the time was right, something for his eyes only.

Carl stirred in his sleep, bringing Jason’s attention back to his face as the younger teen’s eyes slowly opened with beautiful blue eyes staring back at him. A gentle smile formed on Carl’s face as he took in the sight of Jason.

“Morning.” Carl greeted weakly, still smiling.

Jason darted his head forward lightly and kissed Carl gently for only a few seconds. “Morning.”

Carl couldn’t help but let a goofy smile streak across his face after the kiss. He was used to kissing Jason but something about doing it with the others around always made him feel giddy.

“Good sleep?” Jason asked him, smiling back.

Carl nodded and instinctively shuffled closer so they were pressed together. “Is anyone awake yet?”

Jason shook his head. “Don’t think so.”

Carl traced shapes on Jason’s chest with his finger as he reflected on the night before. “I thought we were going to die last night.”

Jason stopped Carl’s tracing finger by holding his hand and squeezing it. “So did I, but we’re still here.”

Carl smiled and stared into Jason’s eyes as the older teen did the same. Neither one of them moved, both of them were perfectly content with staying there on the floor cuddled up. Unfortunately for them, Judith’s cries for food and attention quickly changed that. The little bundle quickly wakened her father who was soon followed by the others. Within moments, the entire barn had sprung to life as everyone woke and started their morning preparations.

Jason yawned and stood up to stretch his body, a couple joints popping as he did before he took his jacket and put it back on. The extra weight in the inside pocket reminded him of the gun he had picked up the previous morning. He sat back down on the floor, crossing his legs as he opened his bag and retrieved his diary. As he did every morning without fail, he marked his tallies. The tally since the death of Kellin and the tally since he and Carl had become a couple. He smiled as he counted the tally marks, it had been twenty-two days since he and Carl first kissed in Gabriel’s office. It felt a lot longer than three weeks.

Once Jason had put his diary away, he and Carl checked their weapons to make sure they were clean and operational. They didn’t want to have to use them and discover that something was wrong. Fortunately the weapons were in perfect condition and they only had a clip of ammo in each. They would need to continue to be very conservative with ammo for the foreseeable future. Jason yearned for them to find a safe place to stay. It didn’t have to be Washington, it just had to be safe. He wanted Carl to be safe, not out in the world like he and Kellin had been.

It was quickly apparent that Maggie and Sasha were missing from the barn. Daryl informed everyone that they had went out together so there was nothing to worry about. Afterwards, he turned his attention to maintaining his crossbow. Carol made sure her knife was as sharp as it could be. Most of the others simply sat and waited while Judith watched all of them with great interest from her place next to Rick.

The barn doors creaked open slowly as Maggie stepped inside, checking to see everyone was awake.

“Hey, everyone!” She called as she stepped inside with Sasha and the man known as Aaron. “This is Aaron.”

Everyone quickly shot to attention and unholstered their guns, keeping them ready should anything happen. Jason was quick to usher Carl behind him before taking his gun in hand as he studied the newcomer from behind one of the barn stalls. Daryl quickly shot out the door to check for anyone following the three of them but failed to spot anyone.

“We met him outside, he’s by himself.” Maggie told them all as Daryl searched him. “We took his weapons and we took his gear.”

Tara closed the barn door as Daryl finished his search. Aaron didn’t appear to have any concealed weapons but no one dropped their guard. Jason especially didn’t drop his guard as he knew there were ways to conceal weapons from a pat-down. He had done it at Terminus.

Aaron stared at them all nervously, taking in the sight of the heavily armed group who all stood defensively. His eyes quickly darted to Judith who was held up in Rick’s arm and then to Jason’s protective stance in front of Carl.

“Hi.” He greeted them with a nervous breath.

Judith instantly started crying, apparently not too fond of the new man in their midst. Rick nodded to Carl and handed the baby over to him. Now Jason stood protecting Carl and Judith at the same time.

“It’s nice to meet you.” Aaron continued politely, attempting to step forward for a handshake but was stopped by the click of gun safeties.

“You said he had a weapon?” Rick questioned Maggie, glaring at the man.

Maggie walked over to Rick and handed him the small Smith & Wesson Model 36 revolver. Rick checked the chamber to find it fully loaded. He glared at Aaron again before stuffing the revolver into the back of his belt.

“There something you need?” Rick asked him, his voice low.

“He has a camp nearby.” Sasha informed them. “He wants us to audition for membership.”

“I wish there was another word, audition makes it sound like we’re some kind of a dance troop.” Aaron commented with a snigger. “That’s only on Friday nights.”

Jason narrowed his eyes as he continued to study the newcomer. If that was meant as a joke it wasn’t funny nor was it the best time to be joking. If it was the truth then that raised more questions. One thing that didn’t sit well with Jason was how clean shaven and well-dressed this man was. He must have a decent camp to be able to shave and clean himself. Stealing a glance at Rick, he could tell the bearded leader had similar suspicions.

Aaron shook his head, realising the reception hadn’t been positive. “And it’s not a camp, it’s a community.”

Jason felt his grip on his gun tighten slightly at the word community. The last time they had heard that offered to them was at Terminus and that had been a death trap.

“I think you all would make valuable additions but it’s not my call.” Aaron continued. “My job is to convince you all to follow me back home.”

Rick continued to glare unconvincingly, he too was having flashbacks of Terminus. Everyone was and it showed in their glares.

“I know, I wouldn’t go either, not until I knew exactly what I was getting myself into.” Aaron commented, aware of the lack of trust. “Sasha, can you hand Rick my pack?”

Sasha did as requested and handed Rick the large, brown backpack. He dropped it to the floor as Aaron instructed him what he had to do.

“Front pocket, there’s an envelope.” Aaron told him as Rick searched for said envelope. “There’s no way I could convince you to come with me just by talking about our community.”

Rick pulled out the envelope and opened it to reveal a set of photos.

“That’s why I brought those.” Aaron continued. “Now I apologise in advance for the picture quality, we just found an old camera store and…”

“Nobody gives a shit.” Daryl interrupted him gruffly.

Aaron turned to him and nodded. “You’re absolutely, one hundred percent right.”

Rick dropped the envelope to the ground as he looked at the photos, the first one being of a large wall that looked to be made of metal.

“That’s the first picture I wanted to show you because nothing I say about our community will matter unless you know you’ll be safe.” Aaron told him. “If you join us, you will be. Each panel in that wall is a fifteen foot high, twelve foot wide slab of solid steel framed by cold rolled steel beams and squared tubing.”

Rick stood to his full height again and continued to glare at Aaron as the man gave the fine details of their perimeter wall. Jason had to admit, this community was starting to peak his interest.

“Nothing, alive or dead, gets through that without our say so.” Aaron explained. “Like I said, security is obviously important, in fact there’s only one resource more critical to our community’s survival, the people.”

Rick glanced over to Carl, Judith and Jason. He considered what this would mean for his children, a safe community where they could grow up without having to worry about walkers or roaming bandits. His eyes met with Jason’s and he could see the older teen still hadn’t been sold by Aaron’s pitch. Neither had Rick. He turned back to stare at Aaron.

“Together we’re strong, you can make us even stronger.” Aaron told them with a smile.

Rick looked down at the photos. All of this sounded very good. Too good. He didn’t trust it. Rick started walking towards Aaron who continued to talk.

“The next picture you’ll see inside the gates.” Aaron explained, nervous at Rick’s approach. “Our community was first constructed…”

Rick cut him off with a swift and powerful right hook to the jaw, knocking Aaron to the floor with enough force to render him unconscious. The others knew what to do and started tying him up.

“So we’re clear that look wasn’t a “let’s attack that man” look.” Michonne hissed at Rick. “It was a “he seems like an okay guy to me” look.”

“We’ve got to secure him.” Rick answered before turning to Carl. “Dump his pack, let’s see who this guy really is.”

Jason took Judith from Carl and bounced her gently in his arms, smiling as she giggled softly as Carl rummaged through Aaron’s bag.

“Rick!” Michonne tried but was ignored.

“Everybody else we need eyes in every direction.” Rick ordered. “They’re coming for us, we might not know how or when but they are.”

While the others scattered around to look out through the windows and gaps and Daryl and Carol tied Aaron up, Maggie turned to look up at Rick.

“Me and Sasha, we didn’t see him.” She explained. “If he wanted to hurt us he could have.”  

She too was ignored.

“Anybody see anything?” Rick called out, wanting immediate updates.

“Just a lot of places to hide.” Glenn answered pessimistically.

“Then keep looking!” Rick barked back.

Rick returned to the back of the barn where Carl was placing all of Aaron’s belongings on a small table. Jason stood by him, holding onto Judith and studying the contents of the bag himself.

“What did you find?” Rick asked his son.

Carl held an orange revolver in his hands, looking at it in confusion before passing it to his father.

“Never seen a gun like that before.” Carl commented.

“It’s a flare gun.” Jason told him as Rick opened the chamber.

“A flare gun?” Carl asked, he had never heard of that before.

“It sends something similar to a firework into the air, which is very bright.” Jason explained. “It is used to signal across long distances.”

Rick looked at them both sternly and nodded. Jason was right and this meant there were other people in the area.

Maggie dabbed Aaron’s face with a cold, wet cloth as he started to wake up. He looked around dazed until his short term memory kicked in and he remembered being punched by Rick. That would explain the ache on the side of his face. He smiled in amusement.

“That’s a hell of a right cross there, Rick.” He commented from his position on the floor.

“Sit him up.” Rick told them.

“I think it’s better if…” Maggie tried to argue.

“It’s okay.” Aaron interrupted her, stretching his jaw as the pain began to throb.

“He’s fine, sit him up.” Rick repeated.

Michonne and Maggie lifted him so he was sitting up.

“You’re being cautious.” Aaron commented. “I completely understand that.”

“How many of your people are out there?” Rick hissed. “You have a flare gun, you have it to signal your people. How many of them are there?”

This appeared to bother Aaron as he suddenly became quite stern. “Does it matter?”

“Yes.” Rick growled. “Yes it does.”

Jason found it curious how Aaron was suddenly uncomfortable. Whoever he had with him were obviously people he cared about.

“I mean, of course, it matters how many people are actually out there but does it matter how many people I tell you are out there?” Aaron countered. “Because I’m pretty sure no matter what number I say, eight, thirty two, four hundred and forty four, zero, no matter what I say you’re not going to trust me.”

“Well, it’s hard to trust anyone who smiles after getting punched in the face.” Rick retorted cynically.

“How about a guy who leaves bottles of water for you in the road?” Aaron suggested, revealing the identity of the friend.

Daryl glanced at a couple of the water bottles and realised that Aaron hadn’t appeared from nowhere.

“How long have you people been following us?” He spat, angry that he hadn’t noticed.

“Long enough to see that you practically ignore a pack of roamers on your trail?” Aaron replied in amazement. “Long enough to see that despite a lack of food or water you never turned on each other.”

Jason tilted his head as he listened to the man. Aaron did seem pretty genuine but it still didn’t feel right. How could anyone live in this apocalyptic world and still be so nice and relaxed? Jason didn’t think it was at all normal. Aaron caught his stare and remembered something else he had witnessed.

“Long enough to see you take on that same pack of roamers to save your unconscious friend. Most people would have left him.” Aaron concluded. “You’re survivors and you’re people.”

He paused as they all continued to stare at him. He wasn’t wrong. It would have been nice for him to have helped with the walkers at the bridge, however.

“Like I said, and I hope you won’t punch me again for saying so, that is the most important resource in the world.” Aaron finished.

The group either stared at Aaron or each other. Jason and Carl shared a long look, as if trying to read what the other was thinking so they wouldn’t have to break the silence. Slowly, they all looked at Rick and awaited his judgement.

Rick stepped forward, his expression stern with impatience.

“How many others are out there?” Rick repeated his question slowly.

“One.” Aaron answered honestly.

Rick shook his head slightly. There was no way he was out recruiting groups of potentially dangerous survivors with just one other person. It was a ridiculous concept.

Aaron shook his head. “Knew you wouldn’t believe me.”

Jason found it hard to believe as well. Though he had an easier time believing that only one other person was out there by Aaron’s body language when first questioned on it. He cares about this person. It shows.

“If it’s not words, if it’s not pictures, what would it take to convince you that this is for real?” Aaron asked them desperately.

Nobody answered. A heavy silence filled the barn.

“What if I drove you to the community?” Aaron suggested. “All of you. If we leave now, we’ll get there by lunch.”

“I’m not sure how the sixteen of us are going to fit in a car you and your one friend drove down here in.” Rick countered sceptically.

“We drove separately.” Aaron replied. “If we found a group we wanted to be able to bring them all home. There’s enough room for all of us.”

“And you’re parked just a couple miles away, right?” Carol questioned.

“East on Ridge road, just after you hit route sixteen.” Aaron confirmed. “We wanted to get them closer but then the storm came, blocked the road and we couldn’t clear it.”

“Yeah, you’ve really thought this through.” Rick commented cynically.

“Rick, if I wanted to ambush you, I’d do it here.” Aaron answered. “Would have lit the barn on fire while you slept, pick you off as you ran out the only exit. You can trust me.”

Silence fell again as everyone thought about what he had said. Rick remained sceptical and distrusting of him. Jason, on the other hand, was starting to trust him. He had a point about ambushing them, the barn was a far easier target than getting everyone outside.

“I’ll check out the cars.” Michonne told Rick, turning to face him.

“There aren’t any cars.” Rick retorted.

“There’s only one way to find out.” Michonne countered.

“We don’t need to find out.” Rick told her with a shake of his head. He had made his mind up.

“We do.” Michonne argued firmly. “You know what you know and you’re sure of it but I’m not.”

“Me neither.” Maggie added.

“They have a point.” Jason spoke up, staring at Rick who turned to look at him. “Aaron’s right. If he wanted to hurt us, he could have done it earlier when we were asleep.”

“I still don’t…” Rick prepared his counter argument but Jason interrupted him.

“I know you don’t but I’m willing to find out.” Jason argued. “We’ll check out his story and see if he’s telling the truth. If he’s lying, we can kill him and his friend, happy?”

Rick glared back at Jason. He didn’t like the young man’s attitude or tone nor did he enjoy the group disagreeing with him. Rick trusted his instincts and his instincts told him that Aaron was not to be trusted. He couldn’t rule with an iron fist, however. They were a family.

“Your way’s dangerous.” Rick told Michonne while glancing back to Jason for a moment. “Mine isn’t.”

“Passing up some place where we can live? Where Judith can live?” Michonne argued. “That’s pretty dangerous. We need to find out what this is. We can handle ourselves. So that’s what we’re gonna do.”

“Then I will too.” Glenn agreed. “I’ll go.”

Rick wanted to guarantee they would come back. He didn’t trust any of it but then he also remembered what Hershel had once told him.

_“You’ve gotta start giving people a chance!”_

“Abraham!” Rick called, turning to the soldier in question.

“Yeah.” Abraham nodded and raised his M16 assault rifle. “I’ll walk with them.”

Rick felt like they needed one other person, just to be sure. With Abraham going with Glenn and Michonne, his final choice made sense.

“Rosita.” He called.

“Okay.” She nodded in response.

Rick approached Glenn. “If there’s trouble, you got enough fire power?”

“We got what we got.” Glenn answered simply.

Rick pulled out Aaron’s revolver and handed it to Glenn. The others opened the barn doors while Daryl moved Aaron and tied him to one of the support beams.

“The walkies are out of juice.” Rick told them. “If you’re not back in sixty minutes we’ll come. Which might be just what they want.”

Michonne nodded before leading her small group out of the barn. Rick turned to the others.

“If we’re all in here, we’re a target.” He told them.

“We got the area covered.” Daryl answered, heading for the door and signalling for the others to follow.

“Alright, groups of two, find somewhere safe within eyeshot.” Rick barked as they began flooding out.

Jason and Carl were the last pair to leave. Rick placed his hand on Carl’s back reassuringly before giving Jason a trusting nod. No words needed to be said, Jason knew Rick was telling him to keep Carl safe, which the older man knew he would. Rick followed them to the door and gave one last nod before closing it behind them. He stood at the door and peered through the gap, looking for any signs of life.

“When the world was still the world, I worked for an NGO. Our mission was to deliver medicine and food to the Niger River delta.” Aaron explained. “Bad people pointed guns in my face every other week. You’re not bad people. You’re not going to kill us and we are definitely not going to kill you.”

“Just because we’re good people doesn’t mean we won’t kill you.” Rick told him sternly. “If the five of them aren’t back in an hour, I’ll put a knife in the base of your skull.”

 

Jason and Carl walked together, both of them with their guns in their hands and ready for anything. Their eyes scanned the surrounding woodland as they walked. They were amazed at the devastation the tornado had left in its wake with walkers all over the place, many of them dead. They had been very lucky to have survived such a storm. A walker blocked their path, its lower body crushed under a fallen tree as it reached up at them and snarled. Jason went down on one knee and stabbed it in the head.

“Can’t believe we survived this.” Jason commented. “We should all be dead.”

“Well, we’re not.” Carl answered.

Jason let out a sigh of relief as he sheathed his knife. “No, no we’re not.”

Carl also knelt down to stab another of the walkers before they continued on. They had to keep themselves aware as they looked for any threats in the woods. The forest was quiet. It always was. They found a fallen tree and sat on the log, keeping their guns in their hands. From where they sat, they could see some of the others and could also see the barn. In addition, they were in the shade and were therefore safe from the intense morning sun.

“And now we wait.” Jason said with a sigh. He hoped Aaron was telling the truth.

 

Abraham, Glenn, Maggie, Michonne and Rosita walked down Route 16. It was quiet with no signs of people or walkers. Around them were fields so there was nowhere for anyone to hide or ambush them from as they would be seen a mile away.

“Eyes open everybody.” Glenn told them. “Weapons up. If we see someone coming at us we fire.”

“Copy that.” Abraham answered in confirmation.

“So if we see someone we just shoot them?” Michonne questioned.

“It’s a good question.” Maggie added.

“What if they’re someone like us?” Michonne pressed. “What if Aaron’s telling the truth? What if it’s someone who has nothing to do with this?”

“We’re five people walking with guns, no one’s coming up to say hello.” Glenn replied.

“But that’s exactly what happened.” Michonne argued, referring to Aaron.

“If it’s someone like us, we should be afraid of them.” Glenn countered. “He said he was watching us, right? It means he saw us yesterday and after everything we’ve done, why would he want us to join his group?”

“People like us saved a priest, saved a girl who rolled up to the prison with the Governor.” Michonne commented. “Saved a crazy lady with a sword. He saw that.”

“I don’t know what he saw.” Glenn remarked cynically.

Unbeknownst to them, someone was watching them from afar.

 

Judith cried out loudly in hunger. They had run out of baby food and hadn’t been able to get any more due to Aaron’s appearance. Rick resorted to his only option, grinding up some acorns with the handle of his revolver. He knew she wouldn’t like them but food was food and that’s what mattered. Aaron shifted nervously with every loud wail from the baby.

“You did see the jar of applesauce in my bag, right?” Aaron suggested.

Rick glared at him.

“This isn’t a trick. This isn’t about trying to make you like me.” Aaron defended. “This is self-preservation because if the roamers hear her and come this way then I’ll be the first to go.”

Rick sighed and holstered his revolver. He got up and carried the starving Judith with him to the table where the jar of applesauce sat. He looked over at Aaron. He had no way of knowing what was in the jar apart from the applesauce. Rick’s scepticism got the better of him again as he realised it could be some elaborate, desperate trick.

Rick opened the jar and took a spoonful out of it. He then quickly brought the spoonful of applesauce over to Aaron and held it out to him.

“You think I’m trying to poison your baby daughter?” Aaron questioned in horror. “I’m tied up and you’ve already expressed a willingness to stab me in the head, how would cruelly killing your daughter in front of you in any way help the situation?”

Rick got down on one knee next to him. “Maybe she doesn’t die, maybe she gets sick and you’re the only one who can help her and I just lose.”

“I’m the only one who can help her because I have applesauce.” Aaron argued. “And we all win.”

Rick raised the spoon up to Aaron’s mouth, causing the man to pull away from it. Rick gave him a suspicious glare.

“I hate applesauce. My mum used to make me eat foods I didn’t like to make me more manly.” Aaron explained. “Sam and Pennies applesauce and onions, she was a very confused woman who tried her damnedest, I just bring the jar to show that we have apple trees nearby.”

“Like you said, you’ll be the first to go.” Rick answered and forced him to eat it.

Aaron’s face contorted in disgust, true to his word he hated applesauce. Rick licked what was left off the spoon and tasted it. It did taste fine, like applesauce should. Aaron was telling the truth, which meant Judith could eat. Rick headed over to the table again.

“The community is big enough, we can find a place for you to live where even when she cries, no one, nothing can hear it outside the walls.” Aaron told him, desperately trying to convince him.

Rick looked at his watch and glared back at him. “You’ve got forty-three minutes.”

 

The birds chirped above them as Jason and Carl sat on the log together side by side. They had ended up holding hands between their bodies while holding their guns in their other hands. It was peaceful where they were. In a woodland, sitting on a fallen tree in the shade of other trees while birds chirped and sang above them. No walkers. No people. It was pleasant.

“What do you make of him?” Jason asked, referring to Aaron.

Carl shrugged. “Not everyone can be bad. I mean, we took people in at the prison.”

Jason nodded. “But people like the Governor and Gareth took people in.”

“I don’t think he’s like them.” Carl replied. “He’s like you.”

“Like me? In what way?” Jason asked with a smirk of amused curiosity.

Carl shrugged. “Mysterious? Relaxed and warm?”

Jason grinned and stared back at Carl. “So I’m just warm now? Here I thought I was hot.”

Carl chuckled at that and nodded. “You are.”

“That’s a relief.” Jason remarked jokingly. “Thought you were going to dump me for him.”

“I could never do that!” Carl quickly answered.

“Good.” Jason grinned and closed the gap between them.

The kiss was soft and sweet. The rational side of his mind told Jason that they shouldn’t drop their guard but his trust in Aaron allowed him to do so. They both had their eyes closed as their tongues teasingly battled it out in their mouths. Jason stroked Carl’s hair from the side of his face before a snarl forced them to break apart.

Turning to face ahead of them, they spotted two walkers snarling and shuffling towards them. Jason sighed and gestured for Carl to stay where he was. He stood up and holstered his gun before unsheathing his machete. Jason walked towards the walkers with a sigh.

“Excuse me, fellas.” He addressed the walkers, irritated. “But we’re trying to have a moment!”

Jason decapitated the closest walker before bringing his machete down on top of the head of the second one. Its body dropped to the floor as soon as he pulled the blade out of its skull. Jason sheathed his machete and used his smaller knife to stab the decapitated head in the temple. He wiped both blades with a cloth before sheathing them and sitting back down beside Carl.

Carl reached for Jason’s hand and intertwined their fingers again. They smiled at each other before staring ahead of them, scanning for danger yet again.

“What do you think of him?” Carl asked, referring to Aaron and remembering that Jason hadn’t given his opinion.

“I trust him. It took a while but he seems sincere.” Jason explained. “Which means this community of his could be very real.”

“I wonder what it’s like.” Carl pondered aloud.

“Hopefully it’s safe with food, water, houses and showers.” Jason commented. “He looked very clean and presentable, so they must have it pretty decent.”

“I haven’t slept in a bed since we met.” Carl remarked. “It feels so long ago.”

“It was about a month ago.” Jason told him with a smile. “Twenty-nine days since we met.”

“That’s all?” Carl asked, amazed. “It feels longer than that.”

Jason squeezed Carl’s hand and smiled. “Here’s hoping this community is everything we need it to be.”

Glenn, Maggie, Michonne, Abraham and Rosita stood in position on the road. Fallen trees blocked the road behind them from where they came but in front of them was a Cadillac and an RV.

“He was telling the truth.” Michonne commented with a smile.

The others remained suspicious as they all knew they needed to check the vehicles and bring them back to the barn. Aaron’s friend could also be lurking around so they would need to keep an eye out for him. The snap of a tree branch sparked them all to turn and aim at the foliage.

“Not one step closer, asshole!” Glenn barked as they all moved into a defensive formation.

The branches continued to snap as the foliage shook as someone stepped through it. Finally, a walker burst out of the vegetation and snarled as it made its way towards them. Another followed it out seconds later. They all relaxed as Abraham strapped his M16 to his side and pulled out his knife.

“I got ‘em.” He told the others.

“We got ‘em.” Rosita corrected him, placing her assault rifle on the hood of the Cadillac.

Rosita picked up a large branch and smacked the first walker across the head with it, caving in its fragile skull. Abraham grabbed hold of the next walker but its arm literally fell off under the force of his attack, causing him to stumble off balance. Before the walker could capitalize on this it too received a strike from the tree branch, knocking it down onto its back. Abraham quickly lunged forward and stabbed the walker in the forehead before sheathing his knife.

“Thanks.” He said to Rosita as he cleaned himself off.

Rosita didn’t answer him.

Abraham followed her over to the door of the RV. He pulled out his Beretta 92FS and opened the door, aiming inside with his handgun. No signs of life. He quickly stepped inside and headed for the back of the vehicle while Rosita stepped in and aimed her Glock 19 towards the driver’s seat. Neither one of them could find any signs of life inside the motorhome.

“All clear?” Abraham called.

“All clear.” Rosita answered.

Abraham returned to the centre of the RV and noticed some cans in one of the cupboards.

“Gracious nations!” He exclaimed as he found a tin of Gorbelli’s S’getti rings. “It has been a while.

“I think I saw Rexy eat three cans one night.” Rosita commented.

“Four.” Abraham corrected her. “Son of a bitch knew that if he didn’t toss them back, I’d have come for him.”

Rosita remained silent, taking a moment to remember and respect their dead friend.

“Back at the fire truck, after Eugene.” Abraham questioned with a guilty tone. “Did you think I was going to hurt you?”

“No.” Rosita answered. “It’s not you.”

Abraham nodded in acceptance, relieved that she knew him well enough to not be afraid of him.

 

The sound of approaching engines caused Jason and Carl to stand up and look towards the road. Carl wanted to step out for a closer look but Jason stopped him and held his gun at the ready. Aaron still could have been lying and this could be an armed group approaching for all they knew.

Within a few moments, a Cadillac and an RV came into view as they approached the barn before parking up in front of it. Jason aimed his gun at the vehicles but lowered it when he saw Michonne, Glenn, Rosita and Abraham step out of them. They had retrieved the vehicles that Aaron had said were there. He had been telling the truth. There was no sign of his friend.

The rest of the group came out of hiding and helped to carry all the tins of food and bottles of water from the RV into the barn. Jason and Carl nodded to each other before heading back to the barn themselves.

When they had all finished bringing the tins of food into the barn they gathered round them. It was certainly a very large collection of food and it was only what was brought on scouting missions. This clearly meant they had much more food in their community. They were set up very well by the looks of things. Rick turned to Aaron.

“This? This is ours now.” Rick told him.

Aaron nodded weakly. “There’s more than enough.”

“It’s ours, whether or not we go to your camp.” Rick replied.

“Wait, what do you mean?” Carl questioned his father. “Why wouldn’t we go?”

“If he were lying or if he wanted to hurt us.” Michonne answered the question. “But he isn’t and he doesn’t. We need this, so we’re going. All of us.”

Michonne looked around at the silent group around her.

“Somebody say something if they feel differently.” She continued.

“I don’t know man, this barn smells like horse shit.” Daryl commented from his crouched position on the floor.

“We’ve all been through a lot. We’re lucky to even be breathing right now.” Jason added. “I refuse to believe that there’s no good people left.”

Rick stared back at him, reflecting on how he hadn’t trusted Jason when they met and now he was Carl’s boyfriend and protector.

“Yes, there’s a chance it could be some trap intended to kill us but we’ll die out here sooner or later anyway.” Jason concluded. “Luck runs out so we might as well try. We’ve not got anything to lose by trying.”

Rick thought it through for a few more moments before finally making his decision.

“Yeah.” He finally spoke. “We’re going.”

Michonne smiled in relief, as did Jason and Carl.

Rick turned back to Aaron. “So where are we going? Where’s your camp?”

Aaron hesitated. “Every time I’ve done this, I’ve been behind the wheel driving recruits back. I believe you’re good people, I’ll bet my life on it but I’m not sure I’m ready to bet my friends’ lives on it just yet.”

Michonne walked up to him before Rick became aggravated. “You’re not driving. So if you wanna get home, you’ll have to tell us how.”

Rick placed a map on the floor and waited for Aaron to give them the directions. Aaron hesitated before nodding in defeat.

“Go north on route 16.” He told them as Rick marked it down.

“And then?” Michonne asked.

“I’ll tell you when we get there.” Aaron replied.

“We’ll take 23 north, you’ll give us directions from there.” Rick told him.

“That’s…I don’t know how else to say it, that’s a bad idea.” Aaron retorted nervously. “We’ve cleared 16, it’ll be faster.”

“We’ll take 23.” Rick replied stubbornly. “We leave at sundown.”

“We’re doing this at night?” Sasha asked, surprised.

“Look, I know it’s dangerous but it’s better than riding up to the gates during the day.” Rick explained. “If it isn’t safe we need to get gone before they know we’re there.”

“No one is going to hurt you.” Aaron argued. “You’re trying to protect your group but you’re putting them in danger.”

“Tell me where the camp is, we’ll leave right now.” Rick retorted.

Aaron shook his head. He refused to go directly there. Rick stood up and turned to the group.

“It’s going to be a long night.” He told them. “Eat, get some rest if you can.”

Rick headed outside the barn and was followed by Michonne. He started checking the inside of the Cadillac for any hidden weapons or signs of ambush plans. He had to be sure. Rick was also looking for a map that might show where the community was. He turned as Michonne approached.

“I’m thinking you, me and Glenn drive with that guy.” Rick explained, gesturing to the Cadillac and then to the RV. “Carl and Judith are safer in there.”

Michonne silently glared down at him.

“You okay?” Rick asked, concerned.

“When you said that we were going, was that for real?” Michonne asked. “Or are you just trying to get this guy to tell you where his camp is?”

Rick stood up. “We’re going.”

“Whatever it takes to get there.” Michonne continued. “Just as long as we get there.”

“When you first came up on the walls outside Woodbury, what did you hear?” Rick asked her, thinking to himself.

Michonne thought for a moment. “Nothing.”

“And Terminus?” Rick continued.

“Nothing.” Michonne repeated and Rick nodded.

“Some time tonight we’ll be outside his camp’s walls.” Rick explained. “And without seeing inside I’m gonna have to decide whether to bring my family in.”

Michonne stared back in thought. She understood Rick’s concerns.

“He asked me before what it would take to make me believe it was real.” Rick continued. “Truth is, I’m not sure anything could convince me to go in there but I’m gonna see.”

Rick turned back to the Cadillac. “I’m gonna see.” He repeated.

Back inside the barn Jason and Carl sat together in one of the corners and cuddled up together. Carl rested his head against Jason’s shoulder while Jason had an arm wrapped round the smaller boy, rubbing his arm gently.

“This place could be what we hoped Noah’s community would be.” Jason commented quietly to his young lover.

“Do you believe that?” Carl asked, not wanting to have his hopes dashed again.

Jason smiled and pulled him closer. “I do. I really do this time.”

Carl remained silent and just enjoyed being pressed into Jason’s side. He hadn’t felt such comfort from simple contact since his mother was alive.

“Imagine finally getting to sleep in a bed again.” Jason continued. “And I’d love to share mine with you, if your dad doesn’t mind, that is.”

“I’d like that.” Carl replied with a soft smile.

Jason smiled back and kissed Carl on the forehead. Their peaceful moment was interrupted by the hungry growls of both their stomachs. Both teens couldn’t help but laugh at how unusually loud the growls were as they were a sure sign of just how hungry they were. Carl removed himself from Jason’s embrace and headed over to the table to grab some cans of food.

Upon his return, Carl handed Jason two tins which the older teen took hold of with an appreciative smile.

“I’m not sure what you prefer, since there’s a lot there.” Carl commented with a shrug.

“Carl, you’re an idiot if you think I’m going to waste time tasting any of it.” Jason replied jokingly. “I’m too hungry to be tasting. I need to eat.”

Jason opened the first tin as Carl laughed at his remarks and started to ravenously consume the contents. Carl was soon doing the same beside him with his own tin of food. Several members of the group around them were also digging in to the vast selection of food that the RV had contained. After so long with nothing to eat along with the last meal they had being barbequed dogs, Jason’s taste buds were going crazy at the rich flavours that were landing on them yet again. If this was a literal taste of Aaron’s community then he was just about sold.

Jason finished the contents of the first can and set the empty container on the floor at his feet. He smiled as he watched Carl eat slower because he clearly enjoyed what he was eating. His eyes scanned around the barn, some people were still eating, others were preparing for the night time journey while the rest were laying down to rest. Jason felt a pair of eyes on him and caught Aaron’s watching him. He studied the man, who had averted his gaze as soon as he had been spotted, and remembered that he was just sitting there tied up. Aaron could be hungry too.

Jason stood up and headed for the table. He grabbed a can and a spoon before walking over to the support beam where Aaron sat. The newcomer watched him approach anxiously, unsure of what Jason’s intentions were as the young man crouched down in front of him and stared into his eyes.

“You hungry?” Jason asked him with a friendly smile. “If you are, I could untie you for a bit so you can eat.”

Aaron shook his head. “No thanks, I ate this morning.”

Jason nodded but left the can and spoon at Aaron’s side anyway. “In case you change your mind.”

Aaron nodded in appreciation but didn’t speak. He didn’t want to upset Rick by talking to the group too much. Besides, he had more pressing concerns.

“The car and the RV were abandoned.” Jason commented lowly. “Where’s your friend?”

Aaron narrowed his eyes, suspicious of what Jason’s intentions were with the question. He wasn’t prepared to put his companion in danger.

“I know you care about them. That’s why you refused to tell Rick where the community is.” Jason told him, revealing his observation skills. “You don’t want to leave them out there, right?”

Aaron sighed in defeat and nodded. He had hoped no one would have caught on to that.

“So where are they?” Jason asked again.

Aaron stared back but didn’t speak. He couldn’t decide whether Jason was trustworthy or not.

“Look, if you tell me where to look I can try to direct us that way.” Jason tried to convince him. “I trust your community is real and I can sense your loyalty to your friend.”

Aaron sighed. “There are some warehouses if you go north on route 16. That’s where we spent the night, so that’s where he’ll be.”

Jason nodded. “Whatever happens, I promise to get him, okay?”

Aaron nodded. “Thank you.”

Jason smiled and stood back up before returning to Carl. He sat next to his younger lover and pulled him close, kissing his temple gently.

“We should get some sleep.” Jason suggested. “We’ve got a long night ahead of us.”

Carl nodded and tried to cuddle into Jason but felt uncomfortable doing so. He wasn’t holding himself as close to Jason as he usually did and part of him wanted to separate completely. Jason could tell something was up.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, stroking Carl’s hair.

“That Aaron guy keeps staring.” Carl murmured into Jason’s shoulder.

Jason looked over and caught Aaron watching them. He smirked and pulled Carl even closer to him, rubbing his back and kissing his earlobe before whispering into it.

“Fuck him.” Jason stated bluntly. “Love is something to be proud of, not ashamed of. Let him stare.”

Carl couldn’t help but smile. He was constantly impressed by Jason’s confidence and trust in their relationship. He was protective and sure of himself and of Carl. It was refreshing for someone to have such confidence in themselves and especially in Carl. They eventually made their way to the floor and used Jason’s jacket as a cover and his bag as a pillow, though Carl chose to rest his head on Jason’s chest instead. They slowly fell asleep.

 

_Jason and Kellin walked down the quiet road, a thick line of woodland on either side of the road. There was a town at the end of the road from what Carlos had told them so they had opted to go on ahead and give it a look. If it was quiet then the plan was to get supplies. It was a relief to finally have ammo for their guns even though Jason insisted they used knives for the walkers._

_As they walked the sound of an incoming engine caught their attention. Before they could dive into the foliage to their right a Chevy suburban sped down the road from behind them. Jason and Kellin both raised their guns in case things got ugly and waited anxiously as the Chevy slowed down before stopping in front of them._

_The front passenger was the first to step out, he was a tall, lean man with dark brown hair and a beard. He wore light blue jeans with a matching jeans jacket and pointed a Smith & Wesson Model 36 special at them, protecting his body with the front of the vehicle. Jason instinctively aimed his own gun at the man and made sure he was ready to fire. _

_The driver’s door opened and an older man who looked to be in his early forties stepped out. He had smartly styled black hair and had the look of a stereotypical handsome bachelor. The man smiled at Jason and Kellin and raised one of his hands while the other unclipped his crossdraw holster containing a Beretta 92SB with nickel finish._

_“Relax, we’re not going to hurt you if you don’t plan on hurting us.” The man greeted, stepping forward and leaving his weapon in its holster on the hood of the Chevy._

_“Get your friend here to lower his gun and I’ll lower mine.” Jason told him sternly, still aiming at the bearded man’s head._

_“Nick, put it down.” The man told him. Nick did as he was told._

_True to his word, Jason also lowered his gun and holstered it, though he kept his hand on it at all times._

_“My name’s Phillip.” The man introduced himself. “You?”_

_Jason thought for a moment before deciding to play things out. “I’m Jason and this is Kellin.”_

_“You on your own or you got a group?” The bearded man, Nick, asked them._

_“We’re with a group.” Kellin was quick to answer._

_“How many are in your group?” Phillip asked them._

_Jason stared at him, the man made him feel uncomfortable. “There’s enough.”_

_Phillip let out a friendly chuckle. “You’re wise to play it safe but we’re just looking for recruits.”_

_“Recruits?” Jason questioned. It made it sound like a gang or the military._

_“Phillip’s amazing brother found an abandoned town.” Nick spoke up. “We’re gonna turn it into a community.”_

_“But we need people.” Phillip finished for him. “So that’s why we stopped.”_

_Jason realised it was the same town they were heading towards. It was the only one nearby. He couldn’t abandon everyone else back at the camp and he couldn’t act with the same authority as Carlos._

_“We’d need to talk to our people.” Jason told them. “But we’d consider it.”_

_“Well, I should get my daughter to safety first.” Phillip told them, looking at the back of the Chevy. “But we’d love to have you in our community.”_

_“Well, if the answer’s yes, we’ll come find you.” Jason told him with a smile._

_Phillip smiled back and clipped his crossdraw holster back on his body and headed back to the driver side door._

_“Keep your daughter safe and take care.” Kellin added with a friendly smile._

_Phillip nodded and got back in the Chevy suburban along with Nick before driving off down the road._

_“Are we going to try that community?” Kellin asked, hopeful for a better place to stay._

_“No.” Jason replied. “I don’t like that Phillip guy much.”_

The Cadillac sped north up route 23 with the RV close behind. In the Cadillac, Glenn was at the wheel with Rick in the passenger seat. In the back, Michonne sat with Aaron who was still tied up. In the RV, Abraham was at the wheel with Rosita in the front passenger seat and everyone else in the back. They were all awake, alert and anxious.

Jason and Carl sat together while Carl held onto Judith. While Carl played with his baby sister, Jason rummaged in his bag for the switchblades that he and Rick had used at Terminus. Fortunately he still had both of them so he took the time to tape them to the inside of his boots again.

“What are you doing that for?” Carl asked him, confused since Jason trusted Aaron.

“In case I’m wrong.” Jason replied simply.

Rick opened the glove compartment of the Cadillac to discover a large collection of car licence plates. He looked at them with confusion. Aaron sensed his confusion.

“Oh, um, I’m trying to collect all fifty states.” He explained with a smile. “Put them all on a wall in my house.”

“You have your own house?” Michonne asked, curious.

Aaron nodded. “See for yourself.”

Michonne lifted the envelope that contained the photos and started looking through them. The photos contained everything she needed to know about the community. The large walls, the solar panels, the expensive houses, the apple trees and more. One thing was missing and it disturbed her. There were no pictures of the residents.

“Why don’t you have any pictures of your people?” She asked him, suspicious again.

“Oh, I took a picture of the whole group but I didn’t get the exposure right.” Aaron answered. “When I tried to develop it later it…”

Michonne turned to Rick quickly. “Did you ask him the questions?”

“No.” Rick answered, realising they had forgotten to do that.

Michonne turned back to Aaron sternly. “How many walkers have you killed?”

Aaron stared back perplexed. “I’m sorry, what?”

“How many?” Michonne repeated.

“I don’t know, a lot.” Aaron answered, not understanding the purpose of the question.

“How many people?” Michonne continued while Rick and Glenn listening intently.

“Two.” Aaron replied, regret lacing his tone.

“Why?” Michonne finished. They needed to know.

“Because they tried to kill me.” Aaron explained flatly.

Rick continued searching the car and in doing so discovered a one way radio complete with earphones. It was basic surveillance equipment used for listening to conversations from a distance.

“You were listening to us?” Glenn asked in shock.

“I already said I was watching you, I was listening to you too, yes.” Aaron explained honestly. “That’s what I was using to…”

“His people could have had one too, they could have heard our plan.” Rick barked. “This isn’t safe!”

Before anyone could say anything else, Glenn gripped the wheel tightly as walkers suddenly came into view out of the darkness of the road. It was a large herd and with each walker that the car slammed into, the more blood there was splattered over the windscreen. Glenn didn’t take his foot off the accelerator.

“Glenn!” Rick shouted, surprised he wasn’t stopping.

“They were right behind us!” Glenn yelled back. “They would have hit us!”

Rick looked back but could only see walkers and darkness.

“I think I can get out!” Glenn told him confidently.

 

Abraham slammed on the brakes of the RV causing the whole vehicle and everything inside to lurch forward violently. There was no way he was going to follow the Cadillac into a sea of hungry corpses.

“Son of a bitch!” He cursed at the sight.

The others looked through the windscreen at the approaching herd, blooded tire tracks and dead bodies the only indication that the Cadillac had been there. They tried desperately to see even the red glow of the tail lights but there was nothing. The car was gone.

“What happened?” Maggie asked loudly. “Are they okay?”

“We don’t know.” Rosita told her.

“We have to go after them.” Maggie insisted, she was not losing Glenn.

“We can’t go through that.” Abraham spat back.

“So what do we do?” Sasha asked aloud to anyone willing to answer.

The walkers started banging on the front of the RV, causing it to rock slightly.

“Double back and go north along route 16.” Jason spoke up. “It’s practically the same direction.”

“If we do that we’ll lose them.” Abraham argued.

“No, we won’t. Aaron had a friend with him, remember?” Jason told them. “He told me that he’ll most likely be hiding out at the warehouse on route 16.”

The others looked at him, surprised he had kept the information a secret for so long and suspect of whether it could be trusted.

“Aaron had a flare gun on him.” Jason continued. “I reckon his friend has one too. That’s how we find them.”

No one answered him. They wanted to criticise the plan but at the same time it was the only decent plan they even had. Abraham simply nodded and put the RV into reverse, backing away from the herd of snarling corpses so they could find the turn off for route 16.

“Dad…” Carl said under his breath, fear lacing his voice.

Jason held his hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. “He’s going to be okay. We’re going to get him.”

 

The Cadillac continued to plough through the herd of undead monsters, the sickening thuds of the bodies slamming into the bonnet always followed by a generous splatter of blood over the windscreen. Glenn didn’t stop even though visibility was almost zero. As soon as the thudding of bodies stopped for a few moments Glenn slammed on the brakes and brought the car to a standstill.

Rick jumped out the car and looked around. They were clear of the herd but the walkers were marching towards them. They didn’t have a lot of time. He looked for the headlights of the RV but all he saw was darkness. Glenn stood on the roof of the car but couldn’t see anything either.

“I don’t see them!” Rick called.

“No, they’re gone. They got away.” Glenn confirmed.

“Alright, we’ll circle back and we’ll find them.” Rick ordered. “Let’s go!”

Rick, Glenn and Michonne quickly got back inside the car. They had to move.

“They’re okay?” Aaron asked, concerned.

“Yeah.” Michonne replied, her focus on getting away from the herd.

Glenn did his best to wipe the blood and guts from the windscreen with his hand so he would have some visibility. He abandoned his efforts as the moans of the undead got louder. He swiftly returned to the driver’s seat while Rick looked at the map.

“We can take the left a couple miles up Jefferson Avenue!” He told his Korean friend.

“Jefferson Avenue!” Glenn repeated to himself so that he wouldn’t forget.

“We gotta get outta here!” Aaron cried from the back seat.

Glenn turned the ignition but it the car refused to start. No matter how many times he twisted the key it wouldn’t cooperate.

“Come on!” Rick demanded of the car.

Behind them, the walkers were close enough for them to be illuminated by the tail lights. Time was slipping quickly away.

“We gotta get outta here!” Aaron repeated, feeling helpless with his arms still tied.

Glenn continued to try and start the engine but he was getting nowhere.

“Come on!” Rick growled in frustration.

“Let me see what I can see!” Michonne told them and stepped out of the car.

“They’re coming right for us!” Aaron called desperately, watching the walkers advance.

“Yeah, we know!” Rick spat back.

“Come on, come on!” Glenn shouted at the car as it refused to start.

Michonne was at the front, pulling arms and other body parts out of the grill and hood but no matter how much gore she removed, the car still refused to start.

“We need to leave now!” Aaron barked. They couldn’t afford to have the walkers surround the car.

“Hold on!” Glenn called and looked ahead of them.

Soaring into the sky next to a water tower was a red flare. Aaron watched the flare in utter horror.

“Shit.” He gasped, eyes wide.

“Who did that?” Rick asked him.

“I need to leave! This is over!” Aaron barked, shifting over to the door. “Let me out! I need to get outta here! It’s over!”

Rick glared back in confusion. “What’s going on?”

“Let me out!” Aaron yelled angrily.

“Did you see that?” Michonne asked them, moving to the side of the car.

She was suddenly knocked flat on her back when Aaron kicked open the door and rushed out the car. He took off running into the woods towards the flare. He had to get there as fast as possible. He had to.

Michonne started to run after him but was stopped by Rick.

“Michonne! Leave him!” He barked. “We need to find our people!”

“They saw that flare, they think we shot it!” Michonne shouted back. “This is how we find them!”

Rick realised she had a point and unsheathed his machete before running after her and Aaron.

 

The RV sped up route 16 and was close to the warehouses that Jason had mentioned. The water tower was close by when they suddenly saw the flare shoot up into the sky. They watched it soar higher than the water tower before arching down and falling back to Earth.

“Who shot that?” Sasha called.

“Could it be Glenn and the others?” Maggie asked desperately.

“Let’s step on it!” Jason barked to Abraham.

Abraham didn’t need to be told and accelerated the RV along the road towards the water tower. Within a couple minutes they came into view of a small industrial estate with several warehouses and the water tower. They pulled the RV onto the estate and that’s when the large group of walkers came into view.

Upon further observation it was clear the walkers were all heading towards an abandoned car in the street. Movement underneath the car showed signs of being a living person. The flare hadn’t been shot by their people but whoever the person under the car was, they needed help. Jason had a feeling it was Aaron’s friend.

“Come on!” He barked at the others and rushed out the side door.

Once they were outside they could hear the terrified screams of a man coming from under the car, attracting all the walkers. Abraham, Rosita, Maggie, Sasha and Daryl all followed Jason off the RV and joined him as he ran towards the man in need.

Jason unsheathed his machete and slashed at the closest walker without losing momentum so that he could slam into a second one right away. A third walker attempted to grab him from behind but Abraham pulled it away and stabbed it in the back of the head.

Sasha stood by the RV and fired her silenced rifle at the approaching walkers. She was picking off the outer layers of the undead group so that the others wouldn’t get surrounded. One walker was about to crawl under the car but had its brain destroyed by an arrow fired from Daryl’s crossbow. Daryl knocked the next walker to the ground with his crossbow before pushing a third one against the warehouse wall and stabbing it in the forehead with his hunting knife.

Maggie and Rosita worked together to stab the heads of several other walkers as they made their way towards the group. They were outnumbered but by working together in close quarters they were quickly taking control of the situation. Jason kicked a walker away from him, slamming it against the side of the car. The walker’s body broke the wing mirror of the car, leaving it to hang by a single wire. Jason decapitated the walker before pulling the wing mirror off completely and using it to crush the skull of the decapitated walker.

Between the hand to hand skills of Abraham, Maggie, Rosita, Jason and Daryl along with the precise aim of Sasha, they quickly dispatched the remaining walkers. They all took a moment to catch their breath and wipe some of the blood off their clothes and weapons. The man underneath the car continued to whimper in pain and fear as he didn’t know who had come to his rescue.

Jason crouched down to peer under the car while the others double checked all the walkers to make sure they were all dead. His eyes locked with the young man under the car.

“You okay?” Jason asked him. “Were you bit?”

“No!” Came the quick response. “But the rear tire is on my ankle!”

“We’ll move it.” Jason told him with a nod. “This might hurt a little.”

Jason gestured to Daryl and Abraham. The three of them pushed the car as hard as they could and slowly rolled it off the man’s ankle. The man let out a yelp of pain when the tire moved but otherwise coped with it fine.

Daryl helped drag the man out from under the car. He was dirty and looking a little pale from the shock of the experience. Apart from his ankle he didn’t appear to have any other injuries.

“You’re with Aaron, right?” Jason asked him, hoping he had deduced his identity correctly.

The man nodded quickly, grimacing in pain. “I’m Eric. Where is he?”

“He’s with our people.” Jason answered. “We got separated by the herd.”

Abraham looked around and could still hear the faint snarls of walkers. He didn’t want to have to fight any more of the undead freaks than necessary.

“Let’s all get inside.” He commanded. “We’ll keep watch for the others.”

“I got it.” Daryl answered and headed out towards the road.

“Daryl, wait.” Jason called back. “If they saw the flare then they’ll be coming here anyway. Let’s not separate too much.”

Daryl shrugged and followed them towards the warehouse Eric had told them was safe. Maggie and Rosita helped support him so he could hop on his one good ankle. They would get his ankle checked out and then they would interrogate him.

 

Michonne, Rick and Glenn ran through the woodland that was quickly becoming filled with walkers leaving very little space between the trees. As they started to feel boxed in, Rick started shooting at the walkers, gunning down two with quick succession. He turned around and fired some more shots, killing each walker he fired at. Glenn was also firing at the advancing herd though it felt like they weren’t getting anywhere at all. Michonne was swinging away and decapitating the walkers as best she could while being mindful of Rick and Glenn getting too close.

As Rick was looking around and firing at the advancing walkers he realised Glenn could no longer be seen. He would have heard him go down so it meant he had backed up into the darkness somewhere.

“Where’s Glenn?” He bellowed at Michonne over the snarls of the walkers.

Glenn wasn’t far from them, he was backing away from six walkers that were following him relentlessly. He continued to back up and fire at each walker, never missing any of his shots. Once all six had been dispatched another came up from behind him and grabbed onto him. On reflex he spun around and ended up falling on his back with the walker on top of him. Glenn grabbed the walker by the side of the head and smashed its skull against a large rock repeatedly until it ceased moving. He took a moment to catch his breath before grabbing his gun and running through the woods.

After a few moments of running he heard the distinct grunting of a living person. Turning to his right he spotted Aaron pinned against a tree with a walker trying to eat him but he kept pushing it away with his legs. Glenn watched as he fought off the walker, he would eventually get tired and die. He considered leaving the man, like he felt he should have done at Terminus. Glenn sighed and shook his head, he wasn’t that person after all. He had to save Aaron.

Glenn rushed up behind the walker and stabbed it in the head with his knife, dropping it to the ground at their feet. He walked behind Aaron and cut the rope that tied his wrists together before handing him back his revolver. Suddenly, a gunshot sounded in the distance. Rick.

“Run if you want.” Glenn told him, preparing to head in the direction of the shot. “I’ve got other things to worry about.”

“We can make it together.” Aaron replied quickly. “But we can only make it together. You said that.”

Glenn turned around to look at him.

“I was listening.” Aaron added. He knew the kind of man Glenn was.

With a nod, they both took off running towards the source of the gunshot.

 

“Glenn!” Rick yelled and fired at the advancing walkers. “He’s gotta be somewhere around here.”

“Move!” Michonne barked.

They backed up as the group of walkers advanced towards them. They were quickly getting boxed in and they were low on ammo and stamina. Rick pulled the trigger of his revolver again but only heard a click. He had no ammo left. He quickly holstered the Colt Python and pulled out Aaron’s flare gun before firing it at the closest walker. The flare struck the walker right in the eye and sparked red, illuminating the woodland as it started melting the walker’s skull.

With more visibility, Rick pulled out his machete again as Michonne sliced the head of the closest walker in two with her katana. Rick slashed the next walker with his machete, dropping it to the ground to finish it off. They looked at the advancing corpses. They couldn’t fight them all.

Suddenly a hailstorm of bullets sounded from behind them as all the walkers were rapidly riddled with bullets and quickly dropped to the ground. Rick and Michonne turned around to find Glenn with his assault rifle and Aaron with his revolver. They were both alive and well.

Aaron quickly put his gun down and raised his hands. “If you really want to tie me up again then that’s fine but hurry up!”

Rick picked up the revolver and thought about it. “No time. We’re going that way!”

He gestured towards the water tower and took off ahead of them at a jogging pace. They all quickly followed behind him.

Within a few minutes they had reached the road for route 16 but found no sign of the RV anywhere. The road was deathly silent. Rick looked around for any signs he may have missed before glaring at Aaron.

“Where are they?” He growled.

“I don’t know.” Aaron glared back.

“If this is a trap to get us back to where you want us your people are going to die tonight.” Rick warned him angrily.

Rick marched ahead of them up the road and they quickly followed suit. Aaron couldn’t believe the bearded man still thought this was all some ridiculous scheme.

“The flare was towards the water tower.” Rick told them and continued to march on.

 

Eric hissed in pain as Maggie applied a bandage she had found in the RV. From her best guess he had a bad sprain or a broken ankle in the worst case. They were relieved to be in the safety of a warehouse, knowing how many walkers were wandering around outside under the cover of darkness. Daryl had opted to remain outside and await the others, providing they were still alive.

Carl held Judith close to his chest while he cradled her in his arms. She had somehow fallen asleep and he had made it his mission to make sure she slept. He loved his little sister more than he could ever hope to describe with words.

“I’m worried about the others.” Carl said to Jason, who sat beside him as usual. “It’s been a while.”

“Try not to be. They can handle walkers.” Jason reminded him. “If they saw the flare then they’ll be here.”

“What if they didn’t?” Carl asked.

“Then they’ll either find this place or head back to the barn.” Jason told him. “We’ll find them, I promise.”

Abraham entered the room as Maggie finished applying the bandage and glared down at Eric, his M16 still in his hands.

“Where’s your camp?” Abraham asked him gruffly.

“It’s just outside Washington DC.” Eric answered with a sigh. He wasn’t going to argue with a heavily armed group. “We call it Alexandria, that’s where it is.”

“That’s not far from here.” Rosita commented from the door.

“Alexandria better be what Aaron claimed it was.” Abraham warned. “If not, it’s your group who will lose that battle.”

Eric swallowed nervously and nodded. “I swear he was telling the truth.”

Abraham didn’t look convinced. Maggie stood up and faced him.

“He’s told the truth so far.” She told the soldier. “I think we can trust them.”

A loud whistle sounded outside. It was Rick’s whistle which meant he was searching for them. Daryl, from outside, banged on the door to alert those inside before he whistled back at Rick. Carl placed Judith in her bag and jumped up, followed by Jason.

Rick, Glenn, Michonne and Aaron entered the small industrial estate and found the RV parked near a blood covered car surrounded by dead walker corpses. Next to the door of one of the nearest buildings Daryl stood waving at them.

Maggie rushed out and embraced Glenn as he reached them.

“Dad!” Carl called out and rushed to hug his father whom he had feared dead.

Jason slowly followed Carl outside with his hands in his jacket pockets.

“Your sister okay?” Rick asked, instantly concerned for his daughter’s wellbeing.

“Yeah, yeah we’re fine.” Carl answered, laughing with relief and joy.

Jason couldn’t help but grin as he watched Carl’s reaction at being reunited with his father.

“Eric? Eric?” Aaron called out nervously, looking around. “Eric?”

“In here!” Eric called from inside the warehouse.

Aaron immediately darted inside as fast as he could. Rick glared suspiciously and followed him inside. Having seen Aaron’s reaction, Jason had just about connected the dots to match his own suspicions and didn’t want Rick to ruin anything, so he quickly marched after him.

Aaron rushed into the room where Eric lay with his foot up after Maggie had seen to it.

“I’m okay.” Eric told him with a breath of relief. “Sort of like a volleyball injury, it’s a broken ankle. At least that’s what Maggie said. I like her.”

Aaron felt like crying as he shook on the spot. He was so sure Eric was dead given how long it had taken him to get back to the warehouse. He crouched down to get a good look at Eric’s bandaged ankle.

“It’s not a big deal.” Eric told him, trying to relax him. “I’ll just go to the infirmary when we get back.”

Aaron made his way to Eric so they were face to face before crashing their lips together, slipping his tongue into Eric’s mouth as he tried to kiss his lover with as much passion and love as he could. They eventually broke apart.

“When I saw that flare go up, I, I thought…” Aaron shook his head, unable to talk without his voice cracking.

“You weren’t worried, were you?” Eric asked him, his heart swelling from Aaron’s concern.

Aaron couldn’t help but nod before sitting down next to him, holding Eric’s hand.

“This is your fault, you know.” Eric told him with a cheeky smile.

“Is that so?” Aaron asked with a small laugh.

“Because I love you and because when I’m worried I do stupid things.” Eric explained. “And when I do stupid things I wind up underneath a rust bucket surrounded by roamers who roll a rear passenger tire onto my left ankle.”

Aaron couldn’t help but smile. He knew it had been Rick’s people who saved him.

“But hey, something good came out of today.” Eric told him, grabbing his bag. “While I was waiting for you I circled the neighbourhood and I found that.”

Aaron opened the bag and pulled out a new licence plate. It was a brand new state that he didn’t have in his collection. That’s when he remembered. His collection was back in the Cadillac. His face fell.

“You lost the licence plates.” Eric stated, reading him perfectly.

“I lost the car…” Aaron admitted with a smile.

Eric couldn’t help but laugh. “Maybe it’s for the best, that monstrosity out front can run but it’s so ugly it’ll scare the roamers away.”

Both of the lovers laughed at this while Rick and Jason looked on. Jason couldn’t help but smile. He had a feeling Eric had been more than just Aaron’s friend. All of Aaron’s actions made sense and it explained why he had stared at Carl and Jason so much.

Eric spotted Rick in the doorway and ended their laughter. “Hi. I’m Eric.”

“Rick.” Rick introduced himself.

Aaron put down the licence plate and squeezed Eric’s hand before heading out the room to talk to the others.

“Excuse me. Excuse me! Everyone?” Aaron got the group’s attention. “Thank you. You saved Eric. I owe you, all of you and I will make sure that debt is paid in full when we get to our community, when we get to Alexandria.”

The group smiled back at him. It was finally happening, the good luck they had been hoping for. They had proved themselves as good people for saving Aaron’s boyfriend and Aaron had proved himself by telling the truth the entire time.

“Now, I’m not sure about you but I’d rather not do any more driving tonight.” Aaron joked, earning a laugh. “Maybe we can hit the road tomorrow morning.”

“That sounds fine.” Rick agreed from behind Aaron. “But if we’re staying here for the night then you’re sleeping over there.”

Rick pointed to the opposite end of the room away from where Eric was.

“You really think we gotta do that?” Maggie questioned their leader.

“It’s the safe play.” Rick argued. “We don’t know you.”

“The only way you’re gonna stop me from being with him right now is by shooting me.” Aaron told Rick sternly.

Rick glared but didn’t speak.

“Come on, Rick.” Jason spoke up. “What you’re doing is just cruel. Let them be together.”

Rick still didn’t answer. Aaron took a step forward but was stopped by Glenn.

“Rick, he told us where the camp is.” Glenn spoke to Rick lowly. “And he really was only travelling with one other person. They’re both unarmed. One of them’s got a broken ankle.”

Rick took a breath, not liking everyone disagreeing with him.

“I want us to be safe too.” Glenn continued. “I can’t give up everything else. I know what I said but it does matter.”

Rick realised that Glenn had a point. It was possible to be out in the world for too long and become stupidly cynical. He nodded.

“Alright.” Rick accepted. Aaron could be trusted.

 

It was morning and the RV and the Buick sped down the road. They were finally on the last leg of their journey towards the community of Alexandria. Rick was at the wheel of the Buick with Michonne in the passenger seat beside him. In the back were Carl, Jason and Judith. Everyone else was in the RV driven by Abraham.

They were close when the RV’s battery ran out of energy forcing the vehicle to stop. The group pulled over both vehicles and were glad that there were no walkers to be seen.

“Can’t win.” Abraham complained. “Might as well paint it red, put a ladder on it.”

Glenn laughed at his reference to their fire engine but he was calm as he knew what the problem was and how it could be sorted.

“All we need is another battery.” Glenn told him.

“Where the hell are we gonna find another battery?” Abraham spat incredulously.

“Right over here.” Glenn smiled as he led Abraham round the side of the RV.

Under the first step of the side door to the motorhome was a spare battery. Abraham was stunned at how simple that was.

“How’d you know those were there?” He asked in surprise.

Glenn simply smiled at the memory of Dale.

“Come on.” He told the soldier and gestured for him to get back in the driver’s seat so they could get the RV started again.

Rick, Michonne, Jason and Carl stayed by their Buick with Carl cradling Judith in his arms.

“The fight’s over. You gotta let it go.” Michonne told Rick. “I know it’s hard, after it’s kept you warm and fed and alive. But this fight, it turns on you. You gotta let it go.”

“That’s what Bob was trying to tell me back at the church. What to risk, when it’s safe.” Rick replied, deep in thought. “When to let someone in. The rules keep changing.”

“They did for me.” Michonne answered.

With that, the sound of the RV starting up again could be heard, earning an applause and cheers from the rest of the group. They were finally ready to complete their long journey.

“Before we get going, I gotta take a moment.” Rick told Michonne before wandering off into the woods.

As Jason and Carl watched him go, Jason couldn’t help but smile as he leaned against the car with his arms folded.

“At least now we know why Aaron kept staring at us.” He commented to Carl.

Carl looked at him while bouncing Judith in his arms.

“He’s like us.” Jason concluded with a grin.

Carl returned the grin. They were finally in good company.

 

After a few minutes of walking, Rick found an abandoned shed that looked like no one had used in years. He searched around all the discarded objects and litter that lay around it and found a blender cup. Rick pulled out a spare gun and hid it in the blender cup. If things went bad, he’d have a backup weapon he could get to.

 

Rick brought the Buick to a stop in front of a large set of metal gates joined to large metal walls. They had finally arrived at the gates of Aaron’s community. The RV stopped behind them as they looked out the windows at their surroundings. No armed guards. No walkers. No signs offering sanctuary. Rick rolled down the window and listened to the surroundings. At Woodbury there had been silence. At Terminus there had been silence.

Rick’s eyes widened slightly in amazement. He heard children laughing, shouting and playing. He could hear children. Aaron had been telling the truth. Alexandria was a community he could bring his family into. Rick nodded his head and turned to Michonne beside him. She placed her hand on his hand.

“You ready?” Michonne asked him, smiling.

Rick nodded and turned to look at Jason and Carl who sat together in the back seat, smiling.

“Yeah. Yeah.” Rick finally replied and turned the engine off. He was in slight shock.

They all got out the car while Rick leaned in to pick up Judith. He smiled at her. He had finally found somewhere where she could be safe, where she could grow up. This was something that had only ever existed in his dreams. He closed the door behind him and cradled her in his arms.

“Even though you were wrong.” Carol commented. “You’re still right.”

“Let’s go.” Rick said to Judith, kissing her forehead.

Jason and Carl walked up to the gates together and took in the size and obvious strength of the gates themselves along with the surrounding walls. The place certainly looked secure and the sounds of children playing inside the walls confirmed it.

Jason reached his hand down and grasped Carl’s hand. He smiled to Carl as he gave his lover’s hand a reassuring squeeze. They had finally made it somewhere safe. Everything would finally be okay.

 

**And we’ve finally made it to Alexandria! I tried to get this chapter finished sooner but life often gets in my way. This chapter was fun to write, though the next is what I’ve been looking forward to for a while. Hope you liked the little Easter egg I decided to put in.**

**As always, thanks for the follows/subscriptions/bookmarks/kudos/votes/favourites etc.**

**Also thanks to the chapter 16 reviewers: sara, The_Man_Called_Madara, AmbroseViolence, TheBlueWinterSelection, jar98, The Sorrowful Deity, rk0192, DarkScribe81 and “BIG FAN OF YOURS”.**

**As usual, please be sure to leave a comment/review to let me know what you thought of this chapter and what you’re looking forward to seeing next.**


	18. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group finally enter Alexandria. Is the community a truly safe place? How will Carl and Jason deal with being in a society again where their relationship is frowned upon? And just how damaged from their time on the road are they?

The sun was low in the sky as it was still the morning. The group slowly advanced towards the front gate of Alexandria as it was gradually opened. Jason continued to hold Carl’s hand as they got closer as an act of reassurance. They had finally found a safe place to stay and he was ecstatic inside to know that. Aaron led the group towards the gates, supporting his boyfriend, Eric, as he limped with his broken ankle. The gate let out a loud bang as it was finally fully opened. Carl took a moment to watch their surroundings, surprised by the lack of walkers. His eyes locked onto the window of a burnt out house. A girl about his age stood at the window, watching them. Michonne passed between him and the window and in that time the girl had vanished. He studied the window in confusion.

“What’s wrong?” Jason asked him, tugging his arm as the younger lad had stopped walking.

Carl studied the window for a few more moments before shaking his head and turning back towards the gate. He felt Jason’s gaze on him before he even looked at his older lover and shrugged.

“I thought I saw someone.” Carl confessed. “In that house.”

Jason looked over at the same house and at the same window. There were no signs of life.

“Whoever it was, they’re gone now.” Jason told him before pulling him along.

The group stopped at the threshold of the gate with their weapons at the ready. Carl and Jason both had their hands resting on the handles of their holstered handguns. A sudden rustle to their left alerted them as a trash can fell over. Daryl instinctively fired his crossbow and killed the cause of the sound. An opossum. He picked up his kill and turned back to the gates where a bewildered looking man stood next to Aaron.

“We brought dinner.” Daryl told him sarcastically, not approving of the staring.

“It’s okay.” Aaron said, more to the doubtful man than to the group. “Come on in, guys.”

The group did as instructed and followed Aaron over the threshold and into the walled community of Alexandria. It had grown very quiet, with nothing but the birds chirping overhead. The sounds of children playing had faded away into silence. Once they had all passed into the community, the large metal gate was slowly shut behind them.

“Before we take this any further, I need you all to turn over your weapons.” The man with black, curly hair told them. “If you stay, you hand them over.”

Rick took a step towards him. “We don’t know if we wanna stay.”

“It’s fine, Nicholas.” Aaron reassured him.

“If we were going to use them we’d have started already.” Rick added gruffly.

“Let them talk to Deanna first.” Aaron told Nicholas.

“Who’s Deanna?” Abraham barked over them in curiosity.

“She knows everything you’d wanna know about this place.” Aaron answered. “Rick, why don’t you start?”

The snarl of a walker made Rick turn back to the gate. Next to the vehicles they had arrived in, a lone undead corpse stumbled down the road towards them.

“Sasha.” Rick commanded.

Sasha turned around and aimed her rifle before pulling the trigger and putting a bullet between the eyes of the walker, ending its undead life. A large, covered up chain link fence closed behind the original gate behind her as she faced the group again.

Rick realised that Aaron had been telling the truth the entire time. What disturbed him was their total lack of visible defence, apart from the walls and the guard at the gate, they had no snipers or spotters. They were sitting ducks in a walled community. Time was ticking for everyone inside. Rick knew changes would have to be made to make the place truly safe.

“It’s a good thing we’re here.” He commented to Aaron and Nicholas before walking up the road and into Alexandria.

Aaron led the group up the street towards Deanna’s house. As they walked, they were able to take in the general look of the community. Trimmed lawns, clean streets and expensive houses. It was a beautiful neighbourhood and looked just as it would have done before the apocalypse. It was a surreal experience to be in a place that was so clean, so safe, and so normal. It felt like stepping into the past.

They reached the front of the house and stopped. Aaron nodded to Rick as a sign that only he could enter the house to meet Deanna. Rick holstered his revolver and after kissing her head, handed Judith over to Carl. Rick patted Carl’s shoulder and shared a nod with Jason before stepping up onto the porch and into the house with Aaron.

Aaron led Rick into the front room. It was well decorated with several books and ornaments. The windows were large and looked out onto the street. A television clung to the wall above the fireplace and in the centre of the room sat a small rectangular coffee table that separated a couch and an armchair that faced each other. Behind the couch also sat a video camera on a tripod.

“Deanna will be with you in a moment.” Aaron told him before disappearing into the house.

Rick paced around the living room, studying the various ornaments, books and mini-telescopes that decorated it. He took particular interest in the mini telescope that sat on top of the fireplace. Lori’s father used to have one just like it.

From the doorway, a short, middle-aged woman with neck length brown hair emerged with a friendly smile on her face.

“Hello.” Deanna greeted. “I’m Deanna Munroe.”

Rick turned his head away from the window. “Rick Grimes.”

“You mind if I film this?” Deanna asked.

“What?” Rick quickly questioned.

“Do you mind if I film our talk?” Deanna repeated her question with more detail.

“Go ahead.” Rick shrugged and looked out the window again.

Deanna set up the video camera to record and pressed the record button.

“Why film this?” Rick asked her.

“We’re about transparency here.” Deanna answered.

Rick walked away from the window and eyed her as he did. She nodded to the armchair next to him.

“Please.” She offered as she sat down on the couch opposite him.

Rick carefully sat on the edge of the armchair, his machete preventing him from sitting back.

“How long have you been out there?” Came Deanna’s first question.

“Since the beginning.” Rick replied.

“How did you all find each other?” Deanna continued. “Did you know each other before or…?”

“We didn’t know each other before.” Rick stated gruffly. He looked around the room uncomfortably.

“I was a congressperson, Ohio, fifteenth district.” Deanna revealed. “You?”

“I don’t think it matters anymore.” Rick answered, unwilling to share too much information.

“Oh, I know it does.” Deanna argued.

“What is this place?” Rick asked her, preferring to be the one asking the questions.

“This is the start of sustainability, that’s what the brochures we found say.” Deanna explained. “This was a planned community with its own solar grid, cisterns, eco based sewage filtration starting in the low eight hundred thousands.”

Rick stared at her as she explained, trying to get a sense of her.

“If there is such a thing.” Deanna finished with a laugh. “And they sold them all.”

“How did you end up here?” Rick asked her, looking around the room.

“Well my family and I were trying to get back to Ohio so I could help my district manage the crisis and the army stopped us on a backroad and directed us here.” Deanna explained solemnly. “They were supposed to come later. They didn’t but there was supplies here and we made the best of it.”

“You put up the wall?” Rick asked, looking to his right out the window.

“Well there was this huge shopping mall being built nearby.” Deanna answered, leaning forward. “And my husband, Reg, is a professor of architecture and who he was mattered quite a bit.”

Rick studied her as she explained the foundation of the community. He was starting to get a good idea of the kind of people lived there.

“He got the first plates up with our sons and after a few weeks more people arrived and we had help.” Deanna continued. “We had a community.”

“You’ve been behind these walls this entire time?” Rick rasped in disbelief.

“We need people who have lived out there.” Deanna replied. “Your group is the first we’ve even considered taking in for a long time.”

“You should keep your gates closed.” Rick told her, realising how vulnerable they were.

“Why?” Deanna rasped back, not understanding why they shouldn’t help people anymore.

“Because it’s all about survival now. At any cost.” Rick explained. “People out there are always looking for an angle, looking to play on your weakness. They measure you by what they can take from you by how they can use you to live.”

Rick paused for thought, looking around the room before tilting his head to eye her again.

“So, bringing people into a place like this now?” He questioned rhetorically.

“Are you telling me not to bring your people in or are you already looking after this place?” Deanna asked him with a cunning smirk.

Rick stared back at her. He wasn’t sure which one it actually was. He couldn’t deny that they needed somewhere safe for Judith to live but he hadn’t decided if this was the place yet.

“Aaron tells me that I can trust you.” Deanna commented.

“Aaron doesn’t know me.” Rick retorted with a shake of his head. “I don’t even know how many by now.”

Rick lowered his head to stare at the floor as faces came to the front of his mind. Dave and Tony in the bar, Shane at the farm, Tomas at the prison. The Governor’s soldiers from Woodbury. The men who threatened to rape and kill his son by the roadside. The Terminus residents. Gareth. The cop, Bob Lamson. All of them were dead for the same reason.

“But I know why they’re all dead.” Rick continued, staring into Deanna’s eyes. “They’re dead so that my family, all those people out there, can be alive. So I could be alive for them.”

“Sounds like I’d want to be part of your family.” Deanna commented lowly, understanding that it wasn’t a psychopath that stood in front of her but instead a family man to the core. “Rick, Northern Virginia was effectively evacuated, millions of people gone. For a long time there’s hardly been anyone here living or dead but still we have lost people.”

Deanna decided that as Rick had admitted to the countless murders he had committed for the sake of his family, it was only fair she confessed her own sins that had kept her own family alive.

“And uh, I’ve done things.” She admitted to him, lowering her head.

“What have you done?” Rick asked her calmly, not expecting anything that would surprise him.

“I exiled three men who didn’t work out and we both know that’s as good as killing them.” Deanna explained grimly.

Rick wasn’t surprised but unlike her, he knew that those men could still be alive and well. They could be alive and they could want revenge. They’d know where Alexandria is. He stood up and walked over to the window with his hands on his hips.

“What do you want from us?” Rick asked gruffly.

Deanna followed him to the window, tiny in stature compared to the bearded leader.

“These families should be able to raise their children in a safe environment, your sons, your daughter, they should have a place to grow up.” Deanna proposed. “What do I want? I want you to help us survive, I know you can help us do that.”

Rick furrowed his eyebrows at her assumption that he had more than one son. He quickly realised she probably thought Jason was Carl’s older brother, given how close he stuck to both Carl and Rick. He knew she’d find out the truth later.

“How?” He asked her, wondering how she knew he’d be able to help.

 “I am exceptionally good at reading people.” Deanna replied. “If I didn’t win re-election I was going to be a professional poker player.”

Rick scoffed under his breath and turned to look out the window onto the street.

“I’m not kidding.” Deanna hissed. “Rick, it’s 3:37pm. You’re sceptical, you have a right to be. But it’s time to decide if you’re the one who’s doing the deciding.”

Rick glanced at his watch and realised that it was off by a couple hours, most likely due to missing the annual clock changes for summer and winter. He adjusted it so that it had the right time. Deanna smiled as she watched him do so, knowing that a part of him was still in the past.

“I was a sheriff.” Rick finally revealed to her.

“Yeah, I knew it was something like that.” Deanna replied, smiling.

 

The rest of the group were all stood outside Deanna’s house, waiting to hear what the outcome was from the interview with Rick. Jason stood with Carl who held his baby sister in his arms protectively. The sound of a door opening caught their attention as Rick walked out onto the porch followed by Deanna.

Rick nodded to the group. “We’re staying.”

Deanna beckoned to someone to come through to where the group was. A young, overweight woman came out with a metal table with wheels. She placed it in the centre of the yard where the group stood before stepping back.

“We need you all to turn over your weapons.” Deanna told them.

This earned suspicious looks from various group members but the looks were dispelled when Rick nodded and placed his revolver on the table. Upon seeing Rick place his weapon on the table, Jason and Carl shared a nod and unholstered their guns before placing them on the table. Sasha was the next to place her rifle on it, followed by Rosita.

“They’ll still be your guns, you can check them out whenever you go beyond the wall.” Deanna explained to them. “But inside here, you store them for safety.”

Glenn, Maggie, Eugene, Noah, Tara and Abraham all reluctantly placed their weapons on the table. The group had that many guns that they were having to balance them on top of each other as there was no more room left. Daryl refused to place his crossbow on the table but it didn’t appear to be a concern to Deanna as he had to reload it after every shot. Carol placed her revolver on the table, smiling at the woman before struggling to remove the rifle from side. The overweight woman smiled sympathetically, it was clear to her that Carol wasn’t the combat type, Eventually, Carol placed the rifle on the pile with a timid smile.

The woman took hold of the table and started wheeling it away. “Should have brought another bin.”

Deanna studied the group and spotted Jason and Carl. “Carl, do you mind coming with me?”

Rick turned to her. “What for?”

Deanna kept the friendly smile on her face. “I need to interview everyone. It won’t take long.”

Carl looked over at his father for permission, which was granted with a nod of the head. Carl turned for Jason to take Judith but was stopped by Deanna.

“Bring the baby.” She told him with an amused grin. “She looks like the most dangerous member of your group.”

Carl couldn’t help but smile at the joke before making his way up the steps onto the porch. Deanna led him into the house while the rest of the group waited in the small yard.

Carl sat on the armchair as directed by Deanna who pressed the record button on the camera before sitting down herself.

“I imagine it has been quite difficult for you to grow up through all of this.” Deanna began. “How old were you when it started?”

“I was twelve.” Carl answered after taking a moment to think.

“I assume your father kept you safe.” Deanna stated openly as Judith looked around the room with wide eyes.

Carl shook his head. “My Dad’s best friend, Shane did. My dad was in the hospital in a coma.”

“Why was he in a coma?” Deanna asked, curious.

“He got shot at work.” Carl told her. “He found us about two months after it all started.”

“And he has kept you safe since then?” Deanna asked.

Carl didn’t answer verbally, he simply nodded as he looked around the room.

“You also have had your brother to keep you safe, haven’t you?” Deanna asked.

Carl stared back at her, visibly confused. “Brother?”

“The older boy in the leather jacket.” Deanna replied. “I thought he was your brother.”

Carl laughed and shook his head. “No, he’s not my brother.”

“So just a good friend then?” Deanna continued. “You two are quite close.”

Carl bit his tongue. He wasn’t sure whether he should tell her the truth as they didn’t know each other. Jason’s words from the previous day echoed in his head, their love was something to be proud of not ashamed of.

“No, Jason’s my boyfriend.” Carl told her hesitantly.

Deanna’s eyebrows lifted at this revelation. “He’s quite a bit older than you. Is Rick okay with your relationship?”

Carl nodded and glared slightly. He didn’t like to be judged and he suddenly felt oddly protective of Jason. “Yeah, he is.”

Deanna fell silent at this. If Rick allowed the relationship then she had no concerns over it being consensual. She could tell how protective Rick was of his people, especially of his son and daughter and had no doubt that he wouldn’t have allowed the relationship if Jason had been a threat. She waited for Carl to continue the conversation. She watched as he looked around the room and bounced Judith on his lap.

“This is the kinda place my mum wanted for us.” Carl spoke up, wanting to take the conversation away from Jason.

“I’m sorry you lost her.” Deanna sympathised.

“I didn’t just lose her.” Carl replied with a shake of his head. “I killed her. It had to be me.”

“What happened to her?” Deanna asked, leaning forward.

“She couldn’t give birth to Judith and we were trapped by walkers.” Carl explained. “So Maggie had to cut her open. I shot her so she wouldn’t turn.”

Deanna nodded in understanding. Despite the brave face Carl was putting on, she could tell he was still an upset child on the inside and decided to end the interview there. The important information could be gathered from the adult members of the group.

Deanna stood up and ended the recording on the camera. She looked over at Carl who had stood up.

“Can you ask Jason to make his way in here, Carl?” Deanna asked. “I’d like to interview him next.”

“Okay.” Carl nodded before leaving the room and the house.

 

Jason sat across from Deanna on the armchair with his hands clasped together between his knees. He leaned forward slightly to accommodate his machete that was still sheathed and hanging from his belt. He stared at Deanna, trying to read her.

“I’m Deanna Monroe. I used to be a congressperson in Ohio.” Deanna introduced herself to him. “Now I’m in charge of this community. You?”

“Jason Clarke. I was a student in Georgia.” Jason answered. “Now I’m just another survivor.”

“Rick tells me you didn’t know each other before the crisis.” Deanna commented. “What happened before you met Rick and the others?”

Jason glared at her for a moment. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to go into any great detail so he plotted out how to summarise things as best he could.

“I was in a large group with my boyfriend, Kellin.” Jason told her, sighing at the pain of the memories. “Over time, I was the only one left. I was alone for six months before I found Rick and Carl.”

“That’s a very long time to be on your own.” Deanna remarked in surprise. “How did you survive?”

“By doing whatever I had to do. I’m surprised I survived myself.” Jason answered honestly upon reflection. “But I wasn’t me then. I was just another one of those things.”

“What do you mean by that?” Deanna asked, curious.

“After Kellin died in my arms, I just shut down.” Jason explained. “I didn’t really feel any emotions for those six months, nothing except pain anyway.”

“How did you find Rick and his group?” Deanna asked, trying to build a picture of their individual relationships.

“They had been staying at a prison. Someone had attacked it and the dead were everywhere.” Jason replied, reflecting on that awful day. “I caught sight of Rick and Carl fleeing the area and decided to follow them.”

“Why?” Deanna asked simply.

Jason shrugged. “I asked myself that for a long time. I honestly don’t know.”

“So you finally caught up with them?” Deanna continued.

“Not right away. I thought I had lost them until I spotted Carl struggling to kill a walker in a house.” Jason continued his story. “You see, Rick was in a coma and Carl was outside on his own for the first time. I stepped in to help.”

“Was he not afraid of you?” Deanna asked. “Rick told me most people are dangerous out there.”

Jason nodded. “He’s right and Carl probably was. I did my best to get him to trust me.”

“What about Rick?” Deanna pressed.

“Took him about a week and that was after threatening to kill me twice.” Jason explained. “But he ended up trusting me in the end, so did Michonne.”

Deanna nodded in understanding and decided to move on to the most important part of the interview. She took a breath, knowing this wasn’t going to be an easy discussion but it was one that needed to be had.

“Carl told me that you’re his boyfriend.” Deanna told him. “Is that true?”

“Indeed it is.” Jason nodded, sitting up. He knew there was an angle to this.

“He’s still quite young. There’s at least four years between you.” Deanna commented, trying to guess his age correctly. “Are you sure he’s not a bit young for you?”

Jason glared back at her and instantly replied. “He’s old enough to decide for himself.”

“How can you be so sure?” Deanna pushed.

“He’s had to shoot his dad’s best friend and his own mother.” Jason argued. “He’s seen more death and violence than you can imagine. He’s old enough to know when he wants something warm and positive in his life.”

“Before the crisis you would have been arrested and probably jailed.” Deanna told him. “I’m not sure if I can agree with this relationship.”

Jason leaned forward. “I couldn’t give a fuck whether you agree or not.”

Deanna sat back in a more friendly posture as she attempted to diffuse the potentially aggressive situation she was putting herself in.

“I won’t stop your relationship. That isn’t my place.” Deanna told him, causing Jason to relax a little. “However, I should warn you that Aaron and Eric have had problems with discrimination from some residents here.”

“And?” Jason asked, boredom lacing his tone.

“They’re two consenting adults yet they face discrimination.” She explained. “In your case, it’s much worse. It is an underage homosexual relationship. Some residents won’t be able to tolerate that.”

“Well, as the leader here I suggest you make sure they learn some tolerance.” Jason warned her sternly. “Because if any of these people try to upset me or especially Carl, I’ll break their jaws.”

“Jason, if you wish to stay here then there are certain rules you have to abide by.” Deanna told him. “Alexandria is all about safety and normalcy. Most of all it is about society. We can’t allow you to be violent to other residents.”

Jason scoffed at this. “Well the safety part isn’t doing too well so far.”

“Nothing, living or dead, has breached those walls.” Deanna informed him. “So how is this place unsafe?”

“No guards or spotters on the walls, all the guns in one location and you don’t bother searching people.” Jason told her with a disappointed shake of his head. “I could have a gun on me right now because you took me at my word outside.”

“But you don’t.” Deanna stated confidently. “I watched you place your gun on the table.”

Suddenly, Jason stood up and reached into the inside pocket of his leather jacket. He quickly withdrew the Taurus PT909 handgun he found two days before. Deanna jumped in shock as he aimed the gun at her.

“And you’re dead because you weren’t careful enough.” Jason told the now frightened woman. “Don’t worry, the safety is on. I’m just making a point.”

Jason put the gun back into his jacket pocket and sat back down, staring at Deanna as she breathed heavily and tried to control her shaking body. The shock of his sudden revelation had momentarily terrified her and she needed a few moments to cool down.

“You’re all naïve. You don’t know what it’s like out there.” Jason lectured her. “Everyone in here will die unless you wise up.”

“Well, that’s why your group is here.” Deanna told him, having calmed down enough to speak.

“You’re lucky that it’s us.” Jason told her. “Most other groups would have just taken this place.”

“Jason, so far you’ve criticised our community, threatened to cause harm to residents and you’ve aimed a gun at me.” Deanna told him. “Do you want to be here?”

Jason sighed and rubbed his temples. “Of course I do. Especially for Carl and Judith. I don’t want them going through six months of hell like I did.”

Deanna smiled and unclasped her hands before sitting forward. “I know you’re a good person, I can see it as clear as day in your eyes.”

“I’d like to say the same about you but you were a politician.” Jason joked. “I never had much respect for most of them.”

“Neither did I.” Deanna quipped with a smile. “Hand your gun into the armoury and get yourself acquainted with the community.”

Jason nodded and stood up, preparing to leave.

“Oh, one last thing before you leave.” Deanna stopped him. “Every adult gets a job here. I’d like yours to be as a teacher.”

“A teacher?” Jason asked. “Why?”

“You were recently a student, you’re young and I think it would do you a lot of good.” Deanna told him. “Our current teacher is getting old and could do with more free time. What do you say?”

Jason thought about it for a moment. Being a school teacher was not something he had ever aspired to but then he remembered that he’d probably have Carl as a student. He smiled before nodding.

“I’ll do it.” He told her.

“I’m glad.” Deanna replied with a smile as she guided him out. “Tell Michonne that she’s next.”

“Will do.” Jason answered as he walked out onto the porch.

Jason looked at the group. He noticed to his right that Rick and Carl stood with Aaron while Carol took care of Judith. He spotted Michonne and nodded to her.

“Your turn, Michonne.” He told her before joining Carl and Rick.

“Aaron’s gonna show us where we’ll be staying.” Carl told him as he reached them.

Jason looked at Aaron and smiled. “Lead the way.”

 

“Both of them?” Rick asked, looking ahead of them in disbelief.

Across the street from where the four of them stood were two large, six bedroom houses that must have been worth at least a million dollars before the world ended. Rick could never have imagined living in a house like that before the apocalypse let alone after.

“At your disposal.” Aaron replied with a smile before gesturing to his own house. “I called dibs on that one, it’s got more curb appeal.”

Rick turned to him, still in a state of disbelief.

“Listen, I know you’re still feeling us out but I’m glad you came.” Aaron told him. “Anyway, Deanna’s asked everyone to give you all your space, so they aren’t all coming at you at once.”

All three of them looked at him. Rick was still suspicious and on guard, Carl seemed grateful and Jason was critical.

“Take your time, explore, if you need anything you call me.” Aaron told them. “I don’t, we don’t have phones, I meant, I’m four houses down.”

“Thank you.” Carl said to him with a nod.

Aaron nodded to them and headed down the street towards his own house, leaving the three of them to their own devices. Rick automatically picked the house on the left and lead Carl and Jason towards it.

Rick opened the front door, peering into the house as the door creaked on its hinges. Carl and Jason were behind him, hands on the handles of their knives through force of habit more than suspicion of any traps. They all stepped inside with Carl closing the door behind them. Rick moved into the large joint living and dining room. The room was huge. Behind him, Carl made his way into the large, spotless kitchen while Jason began wandering down the hall.

All three of them felt the same exact way. It was the most bizarre, surreal yet welcoming experience to be inside a house that they could call their own. They had a place they could call home, where they could start living like they did before the world ended instead of fighting for survival every day.

Carl moved over to the sink and ran the tap. Water came streaming out of it. Jason came back through as Carl moved the handle to check if they had hot water. Jason put his finger under the stream of water and couldn’t help but start laughing.

“We have hot water.” He exclaimed to a smirking Rick. “I’m speechless.”

“We should use it to get cleaned up.” Rick told the two of them. “Whether or not we’re staying, no reason to stay like this.”

They all headed upstairs and discovered upon searching the bedrooms that they were stocked with various different clothes. They all selected the clothes they felt most comfortable changing into before Rick headed off to one of the many bathrooms in the house to finally have a shower.

Jason led Carl into one of the many bedrooms in the house and checked that it looked out onto the street. Once he knew that the window allowed him to see the street he placed his backpack down on the bed. He refused to sit on the bed while in his dirty clothes, however. Carl stood in the doorway watching him.

“What are you thinking about?” Carl asked him, he could practically hear the gears in Jason’s head turning.

Jason smiled back at him. “I’m going to ask your dad later if this can be our room.”

Carl’s eyes widened a little. Jason couldn’t help but grin.

“I asked you if you’d like that and you told me you would.” Jason told him, walking over to the younger boy and kissing him gently. “This could be our room. That could be our bed. You still want that, right?”

Carl felt his heart flutter in his chest. When he had said he wanted those things, he had doubted that they would ever have them. Now that they did he was overwhelmed at the idea of finally being able to share a room and a bed with the older teen. He swallowed nervously and nodded frantically, much to Jason’s amusement.  

 

Rick tilted his head back as the hot water ran down his naked body. It was the first time since the prison that he had showered and it was the first time since Hershel’s farm that he had a shower with hot water. It felt indescribably refreshing. The base of the shower had just about changed colour from white to black with all the dirt that was being washed off of Rick’s body and out of his hair and beard.

After his shower, he stood in front of the steamed up mirror and wiped it clear with his hand. He stared into the mirror to see his own reflection staring back. It was a reflection he didn’t recognise. A long haired, thick bearded man with a hardened expression. It was not how he remembered himself. Rick decided the beard had to go.

Rick took a pair of scissors and started snipping away as much of the beard as he could without it being difficult. Once he had removed the bulk of the hair, he filled the sink with water and lathered his face with shaving cream before he started to properly shave for the first time in two years. It was a painful shave, his skin wasn’t used to it and he was out of practice as he managed to cut himself a couple times.

As he finished shaving there was a knock on the door. He knew Jason and Carl would be getting cleaned up as well so he decided to go down and answer it. Rick didn’t even bother putting a shirt on as he wasn’t quite done anyway. Once he made it downstairs he peered out from behind the wall to look at who was at the door.

Behind the door stood a young, pretty woman with blonde hair and a flannel shirt. She held a tray of various different items and waited expectantly for Rick to answer the door. He relaxed his survival instincts and opened the door to greet her.

“Hi.” She greeted. “I work at the pantry, Deanna asked me to bring these over for you and your friends.”

Rick took the tray from her, realising a lot of the items in it were certainly things they would need.

“Thank you.” He replied lowly, not used to being in a house with a neighbour again. “We’re just cleaning up.”

“I can see that.” She replied, gesturing to the side of his jaw. “You still have some shaving cream on your chin.”

Rick rubbed his chin against his shoulder to wipe away the stubborn shaving cream.

“I’m Jessie.” She introduced herself, having just realised she hadn’t done so yet.

“Rick.” Rick replied with a nod.

“You know, I used to be a stylist and twelve other things.” Jessie told him with a laugh, gesturing to his hair this time. “I could give you a cut if you want.”

“You don’t even know me.” Rick told her, surprised at her offer.

Jessie smiled and nodded. “I can take care of myself.”

 

Upon hearing the shower turn off, Jason turned to Carl.

“Sounds like your dad is finished showering.” He commented. “I’ll go next if that’s okay.”

“Wait.” Carl stopped the older teen in his tracks.

Jason turned back to Carl, towel and new clothes in hand. “What?”

Carl looked down at the floor, his hat covering his face as he summoned up the courage to reply. He slowly worked up the courage to look Jason in the eye, his face flushed crimson as he bit his lip.

“I was wondering if we could, um, shower together?” Carl suggested nervously.

Jason’s breath got caught in his throat as his heart skipped a beat. His legs suddenly felt weak as he processed what Carl had just suggested to him. Carl wanted to shower with him. That would mean he’d finally see Carl’s naked body in all its glory and be able to touch him as they showered. Jason swallowed thickly.

“Um, yeah, if that’s what you want. I, um…” Jason let out a shaky breath. “Yeah.”

Carl’s expression perked up as his eyes widened and his whole body seemed to shake. “Are you sure?”

“I’m sure if you are.” Jason answered with a nervous smile.

Carl nodded so fast Jason was sure it would fall off his shoulders. Carl quickly grabbed his towel and his fresh clothes and followed Jason into the bathroom, closing and locking the door behind them. As soon as the bathroom door was closed, they placed their clothes on the closed toilet seat and in the sink so they wouldn’t get wet. Jason then removed his jacket and hung it up on the back of the door.

He turned to Carl who was standing in the middle of the bathroom fidgeting nervously with his clothes. Jason decided to try and relax him by going first. The older teen removed his black, long sleeved top and dropped it to the floor. Carl swallowed as he took in the sight of Jason’s naked torso, he had only seen it once before but this time it was different. His arms and chest were toned and the faint outline of his abs could be made out as he stood at his full height. Carl struggled to remove his eyes from Jason’s body.

Jason tried to help Carl by closing the distance between them so he could lift the younger teen’s hat off his head and place it on top of the pile of clothes. He smiled at Carl as he took hold of the boy’s shaking hands.

“We don’t have to do this if you’re not ready.” Jason told him softly. “We go at your pace. Always.”

Carl nodded and pulled his hands away. He brought them down to the hem of his shirt before pulling it up and off his body before dropping it to the floor next to Jason’s top. It was Jason’s turn to swallow thickly and take in the sight of Carl’s naked torso. He had glimpsed it at the lake but this was different. Carl’s skin was pale apart from his forearms and neck where the sun still had frequent access and his body was slim. Despite his slim appearance, Jason could tell that Carl was still strong for his age.

Jason removed his fingerless gloves and placed them in the pockets of his jacket before kicking off his boots and pulling off his socks, adding them to the ever growing pile of dirty clothes. He glanced at Carl to make sure he wasn’t changing his mind before bringing his hands down to undo his belt buckle before he pulled it off.

Carl’s heart thumped in his chest as he knew even more of Jason’s body was about to be revealed to him. Slowly but surely, Jason pulled down his cargos and added them to the pile. Jason stood in front of Carl in nothing but a pair of black boxers that clung tightly to his hips with an unmistakable bulge forming at the front.

Carl took a breath as he undid his own belt and pulled it off. His hands shook as he unbuttoned his jeans before he pulled them off and dumped them on top of the clothes pile. His legs shook as he stood in front of Jason in nothing but a pair of chequered green boxers. Jason tried his best to control his breathing as he realised this was actually happening. They were about to shower together.

Jason turned the shower on and set it to a decently hot temperature before turning back to Carl with a smile. Carl smiled back and with that Jason removed his last item of clothing. Carl let out a shaky breath as Jason stood in front of him in all his naked glory. Toned arms and torso, long toned legs and a half-hard member that sat between them.

Carl’s hands shook as he brought them to the waistband of his own boxers. He pulled them off with a shaky breath and stared at the floor, his face flushing crimson as his whole body was revealed to Jason’s hungry eyes. Jason bit his lip as his eyes scanned over Carl’s svelte, younger form. His body was just as cute as he was, if that was even possible. Jason didn’t fail to notice that Carl was also slowly growing hard.

Jason guided them into the shower and closed the door behind them as steam started building up in the room. They stood close together under the hot spray of water as they let it soak their bodies, sighing in relief at finally feeling warm water on their skin again. Dirt and dried blood started trickling down their bodies to the base of the shower, changing the tiles from a milky white to charcoal black.

Carl couldn’t help but giggle as Jason’s hands started rubbing shampoo into his long brown hair. Jason did it as forcefully as he could so he’d constantly move Carl’s head around in a playful manner while at the same time giving his hair a thorough wash. Once Carl’s head was covered with shampoo, Jason made sure to wash his own hair as heavily as possible. Carl opted to help him with it so he could move Jason’s head around playfully in mock revenge.

Once the shampoo had been in for a couple minutes they rinsed their hair with the ever welcoming hot spray of the shower head. They were fortunate enough to find a shower scrunchie hanging from the temperature control. Jason took the body wash and poured it onto the scrunchie before he started rubbing his body with it, covering himself from head to toe in the soapy lotion to remove all the ingrained filth on his skin.

Carl watched Jason wash himself, biting his lip as he couldn’t help but marvel at the sight. It was the hottest thing he’d ever had the opportunity to witness. His heart skipped a beat when Jason closed the distance between them so he could start rubbing Carl’s body clean with the soapy scrunchie. Carl closed his eyes and flushed crimson as his body reacted to Jason’s ministrations, his member rising to attention after being cleaned like the rest of his body.

Jason put the scrunchie back and pulled Carl close to him so they could rinse their bodies of the body wash at the same time. The bathroom was occupied by a thick mist of steam as the two lovers stood under the hot spray of the shower and stared into each other’s eyes. Between their bodies, they were both hard and throbbing. For the entire duration of the shower they had both been desperate to touch the other but they had both stopped themselves from doing so.

“Jason?” Carl finally spoke, staring into the older teen’s eyes.

“Yeah?” Jason answered, stroking his younger lover’s face gently. He was even more stunning now that he was clean.

“I love you.” Carl declared. He was still getting used to saying it.

Jason didn’t verbally answer. The combination of being naked in the shower with Carl, both of them hard and Carl declaring his love was all it took for Jason’s self-control to snap. He immediately closed the gap between them and kissed Carl passionately, his tongue quickly sliding into Carl’s mouth as his arms wrapped around Carl to pull him close against him.

Carl moaned into the kiss, surprised by Jason’s sudden display of affection but relieved all the same. They both badly needed time to be intimate and they had the perfect opportunity in that shower. Jason’s hands slid down to cup the cheeks of Carl’s backside before the older teen lifted the younger off his feet and pushed him against the tiled wall of the shower.

Out of instinct, Carl wrapped his legs around Jason’s waist as his back hit the cold tiles of the wall. They broke the kiss only so that Jason could kiss and bite at Carl’s neck hungrily. Carl could feel Jason’s erection under him as his own pressed against Jason’s stomach.

“I want you so badly.” Jason gasped into Carl’s ear, his voice deep and shaky.

“You have me.” Carl replied, desperate for whatever pleasure Jason wanted to give him.

Jason practically growled as he kissed along Carl’s jaw line before returning his attention to his neck. He bit Carl’s neck gently and sucked at the skin, bruising it so that everyone knew that Carl was his. He didn’t care what anyone would think, all he cared about was the stunning boy pressed against him.

Carl moaned as Jason’s mouth attacked his neck and his strong hands pulled his cheeks apart. He could feel Jason’s member slide into the cleft of his bum, long, thick and hard as the older teen let out a shaky breath. Carl knew it was possible for Jason to be inside of him but he wasn’t ready for that and he knew Jason wouldn’t do it yet. Despite that, the feeling of Jason’s hardness rubbing against his entrance brought him unexpected pleasure.

Jason licked at Carl’s earlobe. “You know, when you’re ready, I’m going to make love to you in our bed.”

Carl moaned in response to Jason’s declaration, his head falling back. He had never been spoken to like this.

“I’ll be as slow and gentle as I can when I take your virginity.” Jason told him, licking down his neck. “It’ll be all about love and pleasure. Your pleasure.”

Carl’s erection throbbed between them as he thought about what it would be like. He remembered Jason’s diary passage about the day he took Kellin’s virginity but he knew those erotic descriptions would pale in comparison to the real thing. Carl gasped when Jason experimentally thrust his hips forward, sliding himself back and forth against his entrance. Jason choked out a moan, not having expected the simple action to feel so good.

“I’m gonna make you feel so good.” Jason rasped, kissing Carl’s throat. “Because you deserve it and I love you.”

Carl whimpered with pleasure as Jason started to thrust his hips back and forth, his hard member rubbing against Carl’s entrance repeatedly as his hand moved round to grasp Carl’s shaft and stroke it slowly. Jason captured Carl’s lips with his own, the younger teen’s head touching the wall behind it from the force of the kiss. They were lost in their pleasure. Nothing else existed outside of that shower to them.

Carl’s whole body felt like it was on fire. He no longer believed the water was heating his body but instead his body was heating the water. Feeling Jason beneath him felt incredible and the slow strokes of Jason’s hand on his hard shaft had him moaning and whining into the passionate kiss they were sharing. He had no idea it was possible to feel so much pleasure in different areas of his body all at the same time. He instinctively wrapped his arms around Jason’s neck to pull him closer, earning a low growl from the older teen who broke the kiss to lick some water off his neck.

Jason moaned against Carl’s neck, echoing the moan that had just escaped from the younger boy’s lips as he increased the speed of his thrusts. The head of his shaft constantly pressing against Carl’s untouched entrance as the water allowed him to slide himself between the cheeks easily and quickly. His hand remained wrapped tightly around Carl’s weeping erection, stroking it faster to match the increase in speed of his thrusts. He leaned forward and bit the other side of Carl’s neck to give it a matching love bite. Carl mewled at the increase in pleasure.

“Your neck is a sensitive spot, isn’t it?” Jason muttered lowly into his ear.

Carl nodded quickly and tightened his hold on Jason’s neck and hips with his arms and legs, trying to pull himself as close against Jason’s body as possible. Jason grinned at Carl’s reaction and continued to increase the pace of his thrusts and strokes. They weren’t even having full sex yet he felt amazing. He couldn’t wait until the day he’d finally get to be inside Carl for the first time but his experience reminded him that it was something that needed to be built up to. Jason had no complaints with sticking to what they were doing.

Carl brought their lips together again, his tongue desperately seeking entrance to Jason’s mouth which the older teen granted so that their tongues could dance. They both moaned into the kiss as Jason thrust his hips as fast as he could in their current position against the shower wall. His strokes on Carl’s shaft reached the fastest speed his arm would allow, aided by the water that was continuing to run down their bodies. Carl’s eyes were squeezed shut from pleasure. He had never been in such a euphoric state in his life, his heart thudded loudly in his chest from the sexual adrenaline and the knowledge that this was the first of many such moments they would be sharing.

“Jason, I, I’m…I’m close.” Carl gasped out between shaky breaths of pleasure.

Jason kissed Carl’s jaw. “I know, me too. So good.”

Jason captured Carl’s lips with his own yet again, kissing him with as much love and passion as he could muster from his tongue and jaw. His hand that was wrapped round Carl’s ardent shaft focused its strokes on the throbbing and weeping head, earning loud mewls of pleasure from Carl. His own shaft continued to grind against Carl’s entrance between the cheeks of his bum, causing Jason himself to moan loudly. He knew that even with the loudness of the shower itself, they were probably being too loud but he couldn’t find it in himself to care. Carl suddenly broke the kiss.

“Jason! I…I’m!” Carl tried to speak but he cut himself off with a high pitched cry of pleasure.

Carl’s member throbbed violently in Jason’s hand before he spilled all over his fingers. The strength of the orgasm hit him like a freight train, overwhelming his senses completely as he went limp. The only thing holding Carl up was Jason’s one arm and the wall against his back. Carl panted from the pleasure as Jason gently set him down on his feet, his legs wobbling from the ecstasy that was still shooting through his system.

Before he let himself calm down completely he caught sight of Jason’s still hard shaft. Jason hadn’t finished yet. Carl willed his legs to stand strong as he closed the gap between them again and kissed Jason’s neck, forcing the older teen against the other shower wall. Jason hissed as the cold tiles made contact with his back before gasping out in pleasure as Carl’s hand wrapped around his sensitive shaft.

Carl decided to do the same as Jason and bit into the older teen’s neck before sucking and licking at the skin. It was a little sloppy and awkward but he succeeded in branding Jason with a love bite of his own. His hand pumped Jason’s throbbing member as fast as he could as he kissed Jason forcefully, he was desperate to make Jason finish. It didn’t take much. After a few more quick strokes, Jason moaned loudly into the kiss and spilled into Carl’s hand.

The two young lovers stood under the hot spray of the shower, panting heavily as they came down from their sexual highs. They let the warm water wash away any mess on their hands and bodies. They smiled at each other as they stared into each other’s pleasure-blown eyes.

“That was…” Jason started, struggling to find his voice to speak.

“Amazing.” Carl finished.

They shared one slow, gentle and final kiss under the hot water before they finally turned it off and stepped out to dry themselves.

 

Jessie snipped away at the hair at the back of Rick’s head with a pair of scissors. Cutting someone’s hair was second nature to her and it showed. Rick leaned forward on the chair he sat in, a towel around him so none of the loose hairs irritated his skin.

“I have two boys, Ron and Sam. Ron’s my oldest boy, he’s about your son’s age.” Jessie told him as she continued cutting his hair. “I could introduce them, if that’s okay with you and…”

“It’s just me.” Rick replied grimly, thinking of Lori. “That’d be, that’d be great.”

“I’m sorry.” Jessie said, feeling guilty for having opened an emotional wound.

“Electricity, showers, haircuts.” Rick said between shaky breaths. “I never thought I’d see those again.”

“Come on.” Jessie replied with a smile. “Haircuts were never going away.”

Rick remained silent, closing his eyes as he tried to process such a radical change. Jessie stopped what she was doing.

“It’s okay if you’re not okay with this yet.” Jessie told him, checking his hair. “That’s better.”

She handed Rick a small mirror so he could see the results of the haircut. Between shaving and getting his haircut he resembled the man he used to be two years previous. It was a man he no longer recognised. It was a man who no longer existed. The apocalyptic world had warped Rick into someone new, someone strong, someone brutal. He wasn’t sure how he felt about that transition.

 

Jason stared at himself in the mirror. He was shocked by the amount of facial hair that had grown since the last time he shaved. He shook his head with a slight laugh and started applying shaving cream to his face before using the razor to shave away the excess hair and stubble.

Carl stood by and watched him shave. He admired Jason’s bare torso in between getting himself dressed into fresh clothes consisting of new walking shoes, slim dark jeans and a long sleeved grey top. He felt incredibly fresh and clean after the extended shower. Carl couldn’t remove the joyful smile that was plastered to his face as a result of their recent intimacy.

Jason finished shaving and dried his face, nodding to himself in the mirror as he resembled his old self a little more. His hair would need cut soon as one of his bangs covered his left eye due to the parting he put in his hair. Jason tied his new black boots before pulling on a long sleeved black top that he tucked into his dark blue slim jeans. After fastening his belt he pulled on a smart short sleeved grey shirt which he buttoned up except for the top button. Considering the blood and dirt that covered his old leather jacket, he opted to wash it and replaced it with a new black leather jacket that had two grey stripes across each bicep and a host of pockets. He took the gun from his old jacket pocket and placed it into the inside pocket of his new jacket.

“I thought we were supposed to hand in all our guns.” Carl commented, surprised to see Jason still had one.

Jason sighed. “Carl, Deanna warned me that some people might not approve of our relationship. I’m keeping it on me in case something happens.”

“Do you really think they would try to hurt us?” Carl asked, surprised by such thoughts.

Jason placed his hands on Carl’s shoulders. “The things I saw in the old world make me think that, yeah.”

Carl lowered his head, disheartened that there would be people willing to get violent over a relationship.

“But don’t worry. If anyone, and I mean anyone, tries to hurt you because we love each other.” Jason told him, looking him sternly in the eyes. “I’ll kill them.”

Carl nodded, accepting Jason’s commitment. “It shouldn’t be that way though.”

“Try telling them that.” Jason remarked cynically. “Let’s head downstairs in case your dad thinks we drowned in the shower.”

Jason’s joking remark was enough to get Carl smiling again. He nodded and followed Jason down the staircase and back into the front room where the found Rick with Judith in his arms. They both froze in place. Rick was clean shaven and had short hair again. Rick stared back at them with a confused look.

“What?” He asked them.

“Who are you and where’s Rick?” Jason joked back.

Rick smirked and glared at him. “Very funny.”

“Who cut your hair?” Carl asked, having not heard anyone come in.

“Jessie, a woman who lives just down the road.” Rick told them.

“I should probably get a haircut too.” Jason commented before tugging at Carl’s hair. “So should you, any longer and we’re gonna lose you under there.”

Carl giggled and rescued his hair from Jason’s grasp. “It’s fine like this.”

They walked out onto the porch where Carol and Daryl were. Carol was observing the street while Daryl sat by the steps so he could cut open and gut his opossum.

“Daryl, you are like a cat.” Jason commented with a smirk.

“Food’s food.” Daryl replied without looking up.

Carl eyed the other house with curiosity. “I wonder what that house is like.”

Rick realised what Carl was hinting at. “You can look, just be quick.”

“Okay.” Carl smiled and headed down onto the street.

Jason followed closely behind his younger lover. He wasn’t about to let Carl out of his sight until he knew what Alexandria was like and everyone was together. Deanna was still interviewing members of the group. He felt a presence behind him and turned to see Carol was joining them on their adventure into the second house.

Carl opened the door and they all stepped inside. The house had a different layout to the first one but was just as spacious and looked like it had just as many rooms. Their eyes scanned the walls and furniture as they slowly wandered around.

“These are like mansions.” Carl commented with an amazed smirk.

“That they are.” Jason answered, his hands in his jean pockets.

“And they’re just giving them away.” Carol commented suspiciously.

“Which means this is either the most elaborate death trap ever conceived.” Jason replied, walking over to the window beside her. “Or they are genuinely nice and frankly, far too naïve to be alive right now.”

“Which one do you think it is?” Carol asked him, eyeing him and reading his expression as he answered.

“They’re naïve. My interview with Deanna told me that much.” Jason replied. “They aren’t bad people.”

“If that’s what you think, then why do you still have a gun hidden in your jacket?” Carol questioned, challenging him.

Jason narrowed his eyes in surprise. “You don’t miss much, do you?”

“I saw you cleaning it back at the barn.” Carol told him. “So, you still feel like you need it.”

Jason sighed. “I said they weren’t bad people. I didn’t say that I trusted them.”

Carol moved away from the window. She had seen enough of the house and figured she should meet back up with Rick. Jason and Carl were safe together, especially considering Jason still had a loaded gun.

She turned to them. “You two coming?”

“We’ll be five minutes.” Jason replied with a smile and a wink.

Carol rolled her eyes. Young love at its finest.

Once Carol had left the house, Jason turned to Carl and grinned mischievously. Carl was too busy looking at the books on the shelf to even notice.

“Hey, guess what?” Jason asked excitedly.

Carl turned to face him. “What?”

Jason swallowed his question with his lips, kissing Carl and licking his lips before his tongue slid into the younger’s mouth. Their tongues duelled for a few moments before they slowly broke the kiss.

“What was that for?” Carl asked him with an amused smile.

Jason shrugged. “I didn’t think I needed a reason to kiss my boyfriend.”

“What if I decide that you do?” Carl asked playfully.

“Then I’ll never run out of reasons. I can promise you that.” Jason replied with a grin before kissing him again.

 

Carol returned to the street in time to find Rick and Daryl walking down the grassy path that separated the two houses. She walked up the path to join them.

“They’re right next to each other but…” Carol began.

“They took our weapons and now they’re splitting us up.” Rick finished, looking at both Carol and Daryl.

“Yeah.” Daryl replied.

“Yeah.” Rick repeated in thought. “We’ll all be staying in the same house tonight.”

Rick, like many of the others, still found it hard to trust the people of Alexandria. The steel walls helped prevent anything outside from getting in but they also stopped anything inside from getting out. They had been stripped of their weapons, given massive and expensive houses, supplies, new clothes, hot showers and all the commodities they had missed for so long. It sounded too good to be true and it probably was. They were expected to use both houses, halving the size of the group in each location. Rick wouldn't’ allow that. He’d make life difficult for them if they were planning something.

 

Jason and Carl broke apart from their lip lock at the sound of banging coming from one of the upstairs rooms. Their instincts instantly kicked in and they each stepped apart and placed a hand on the handles of their knives. Something was in the house with them. The two of them slowly made their way up the staircase with Jason taking the lead.

Once they reached the top of the stairs their eyes quickly scanned for the source of the noise along with any potential danger. All the bedroom and bathroom doors were wide open except for one. A few more bangs came from the other side of the closed door. They unsheathed their knives and nodded to each other before approaching the door.

Carl stepped forward and placed his hand on the round doorknob. He held his knife in his other hand and took a breath, preparing himself for whatever lay on the other side while trying to slow down his increasing heart rate. Jason, who stood behind Carl with his own knife at the ready, noticed his hesitation.

“Remember I’m right behind you.” He whispered to his younger lover.

Carl closed his eyes and swallowed before nodding. His eyes snapped open and he pulled the door open as quickly as he could, rapidly stepping back and raising his knife defensively. Jason had his knife in a similar position as he peered over Carl’s head into the room. It was empty. No people. No walker. It was another empty room.

The two teens stepped into the room and sheathed their knives. Pillows, albums, pens, books, comics and other random items were scattered all over the floor. It looked like the den of a couple teenagers or simply one very lonely adolescent. Another bang sounded from inside the room, revealing that one of the windows hadn’t been shut properly and was banging with the wind. Jason made his way over and shut the window while Carl examined one of the comic books.

“Technically this is also our house.” Jason commented. “If you wanna read it, take it.”

“What if it belongs to somebody?” Carl asked, his pre-apocalypse manners returning.

“Then they’ll come looking for it.” Jason answered. “Or we can go door to door about it tomorrow.”

Carl nodded and held the comic firmly in his hand before he made his way back towards the door. Jason watched him go, taking the opportunity to let his eyes run up and down Carl’s slim figure.

“We should probably get back.” Carl told him, turning round and catching him in the act.

Jason didn’t even try to hide what he had been doing. “Yeah, let’s go.”

 

Later that night the whole group were sat around the spacious living room of the first house. They were all doing their own things. Carol was sitting on the couch writing things down on some paper, Maggie and Glenn were preparing pillows and covers for the night. Sasha and Abraham sat by the windows, looking out onto the street so they could spot any approaching threats. Tara lay on the floor reading a book while Rosita and Eugene got comfortable in their sleeping spots for the night. Daryl sat by the window near Judith’s cot which she was placed into carefully by Rick. Noah was rummaging through the drawers to see what was in them.

Carl sat at the dining table reading the comic he found in the second house. Jason sat next to him with his diary open on the table as he wrote a new entry on his first impressions of Alexandria. He didn’t know why, but he didn’t feel comfortable in the house. The door wasn’t barricaded, the lights were on and some windows were open. They barely had any weapons, with only Carol and Carl knowing about his hidden Taurus. That was the only firearm apart from Daryl’s crossbow. It didn’t feel right to be in the family room of a large family house. It made it feel like it was no longer the apocalypse.

Michonne came into the room with a toothbrush in one hand and her sword in the other.

“How long was I in there for?” She asked with a relieved sigh.

“Twenty minutes?” Rick guessed, walking over to her.

“I could not stop brushing.” Michonne replied, rubbing her nose.

She stopped to stare at Rick’s face, a smile creeping on her lips as she saw his shaven face for the first time since she met him. Rick stared back, wondering what had peeked her interest so much.

“I’ve never…I’ve never seen your face like that.” Michonne commented with a grin,

“That’s what I felt.” Rick replied. “Before and after.”

Rick rubbed his chin with his hand and was about to walk past her but the samurai stopped him.

“I get why we’re playing it safe. We should.” Michonne whispered. “But it’s just…I have a good feeling about this place.”

“Well, I hope you’re right.” Rick answered, looking around at the room.

“Yeah, me too.” Michonne commented lowly. Her instincts were usually right but she wasn’t perfect.

A sudden knock on the front door alerted them all. Most of them reached for their knives, Daryl for his crossbow, and Jason had one hand on the inside of his leather jacket. Rick made his way to the door and opened it to reveal Deanna.

“Rick, I just wanted to…” Deanna began then froze, staring at his face. “Wow.”

Rick turned his head and groaned. That was the third time that someone had passed comment now.

“I didn’t know what was under there.” Deanna remarked with a smile. “Listen, I don’t mean to interrupt I just wanted to stop by and see how you’re all settling in.”

Deanna looked past Rick and into the front room to find the entire group either sitting or standing. All of them were staring at her suspiciously, all of them were still very much alert. She likened them to wild animals that had been brought into captivity for the first time.

“Oh my…” Deanna gasped in surprise. “Staying together? Smart.”

“No one said we couldn’t.” Rick commented.

“You said you’re a family, that’s what you said.” Deanna replied with a smile. “Absolutely amazing to me how people with completely different backgrounds and nothing in common can become that, don’t you think?”

“Everybody said you gave them jobs.” Rick stated curiously.

Deanna nodded. “Yeah, part of this place. Looks like the communists won after all.”

Rick smiled at her joking comment. “Well, you didn’t give me one.”

“I have. I just haven’t told you yet, same with Michonne.” Deanna replied. “I’m closing in on something for Sasha and I’m just trying to figure Mr. Dixon out. But I will.”

Daryl glared back at her in an act of defiance. He didn’t want her to figure him out at all.

“You look good.” Deanna finished, smiling to Rick before leaving.

Rick slowly closed the door behind her. It did all seem to be genuine but they would need to keep their guard up overnight. If any moves were going to be made against them it would most likely be at night.

 

_Jason coughed as his eyes fluttered open. He was lying on his front, his face stinging from carpet burn along with a dull pain in his back. When he tried to get up he realised he was pinned under the remains of a fallen brick wall. Jason coughed again, dust and smoke filling his lungs and causing him to splutter. Scanning his surroundings all he could see was fire, smoke and the shuffling feet of walkers. All around the echoes of screams and gunfire sounded. He groaned in pain and effort as he tried to remember what had happened._

_Slowly but surely his memory started to kick in. He had been out on a run with Daryl to get supplies for Alexandria. They had found a large store with plenty of supplies in it. Also in the store was a group of armed men. A gunfight had ensued, they had killed two of them and had managed to escape back to Alexandria. They were safe. A few hours later an explosion had sounded at the front gate before a tank had come charging through followed by several cars._

_Jason had been among the first of the Alexandria residents to attempt some kind of defence against a small army like the one that had broken through the gates. He had ran out of bullets and had been trying to get Carl to safety when the tank fired and blew him into the house, knocking him out._

_Jason looked around frantically from where he was pinned down but couldn’t find any sign of his boyfriend. He was missing. He could be alive and need his help or worse, he could be dead. Jason shook his head. He refused to even consider that possibility. He would have tried to call out for Carl but it was too dangerous with all the walkers roaming around._

_Carl. He had to find Carl._

_Jason growled as he forced himself to his feet, his arms and legs shaking violently as he lifted himself from under the rubble. He was pretty sure he had a couple broken bones but he had to ignore the excruciating pain that shot through his system. He had to find Carl first. As he looked around at his full height he realised how lucky he was. The upper floors of the house were ablaze with debris crashing down around him._

_Jason quickly rushed into the street and pulled out his hidden gun from his inside pocket. He could still hear gunshots further down the road and he hoped that it was the group. That they were still alive to fight back or were even executing the attackers at that very moment. He nearly fell flat on his face when a walker suddenly grabbed his ankle. Jason’s face went pale as he identified the snarling face below him. Michonne. She had been stabbed with her own sword and left to turn by those monsters. Jason pulled the sword out of her chest and used it to stab her head, ending her reanimation._

_As much as he wanted to cry, he knew there was no time for tears. He had to find Carl in the middle of all the chaos, destruction and death. Jason ran further down the road before stopping in his tracks at another horrid sight. Carol lay dead in the street, her body riddled with bullet holes with one of them in her forehead. Her corpse had been ripped open and was being feasted on by a walker with long hair and a crossbow by its side on the road. Daryl was also dead. The reanimated Daryl hadn’t noticed Jason yet so he quickly rushed up behind it and stabbed it in the back of the skull with his knife._

_Jason’s legs shook as his body started to weaken. He didn’t know if he wanted to keep going. The people he saw as the strongest members of the group were all dead so far. Jason clenched his fists, squeezing the handle of the gun before he continued down the road. He’d kill the monsters who did this. Every single one of them._

_Jason stopped running when he reached the tank. It looked like it had been destroyed during the battle somehow as most of the other vehicles were overturned or on fire. Slumped against the side of the tank was Rick’s corpse, a bullet hole in his chest and in his head. He had been left to turn but someone must have put him down. A gun lying by Rick’s body caught his attention, a Beretta 92FS. It was Carl’s gun, he was sure of it. Jason’s hands shook. Carl wouldn’t last long if he was unarmed._

_He darted round the side of the tank and discovered that the group of men were still very much alive. They hadn’t noticed him yet so he took his opportunity and started firing his gun. He struck the first in the back of the head, the second in the ear and the third in the eye as he whipped round. Only one was left, standing in the centre of the road completely calm._

_Jason aimed his gun at the man dressed all in black and wearing a trench coat. The man turned to him, revealing his sinister face decorated with an eyepatch. Jason’s mouth hung open as he recognised the man. Phillip from the road with Kellin almost two whole years previous. This had been him._

_“Where’s Carl?!” Jason bellowed furiously, aiming at Phillip’s head._

_“You want him?” The Governor asked with a sadistic grin. “Here, have him.”_

_The Governor pushed a smaller figure from behind him towards Jason. Ripped jeans. Torn shirt. The sheriff hat falling apart. It was Carl. Carl stumbled towards Jason before looking at him. Jason felt his blood run cold. That one look into his eyes shattered Jason’s heart into a million pieces. Carl’s glazed, dead eyes looked at him as he snarled and stumbled forward. He was dead. Phillip had left him to turn into a walker._

_Jason collapsed to his knees and dropped his gun. He couldn’t. He had failed. Carl was dead. Everyone was dead. Everyone that had kept him alive was gone. Carl was the only reason he had lasted so long. He had promised Carl that he’d always keep him safe. He had failed. He had lost him. He had been too weak, too slow, and too stupid._

_Carl’s corpse descended upon him, snarling with outstretched arms. Jason instinctively grabbed him by his neck and held him at arm’s length. It was a struggle as he didn’t even want to. He had no energy left._

_“You know, he kept telling me that you’d come to save him.” The Governor teased venomously. “Said you loved him too much to abandon him.”_

_Jason growled long and low in his throat. He picked up his gun and shot Carl from under his chin, ending his life as a walker. He glared at the Governor with unadulterated hatred and leapt to his feet to charge at him. Jason collided with the larger man, punching him wherever he could. Face. Chest. Stomach. Side. Head. He used all his strength to push him against one of the cars before kneeing him in the groin. The Governor doubled over, giving Jason the opportunity to grab his head and slam it through the car’s window. He pulled the Governor out from the window and forced him to the floor._

_Jason jumped on his chest to wind him and break ribs. He knelt on him and started punching him in the face as hard and as fast as he could. Jason didn’t stop. The impact tremors shook his arms. His knuckles poured with blood but he kept punching. He eventually stopped and pressed the barrel of the gun to the Governor’s forehead, glaring into the man’s euphoric eyes._

_“I’m hope you rot in hell you fucking animal!” Jason roared before pulling the trigger._

_He didn’t stop at one shot. He fired all of his remaining bullets into the Governor’s head as he shrieked angrily. When the gun clicked empty, Jason felt his whole body shake with terror. The Governor was still alive and still smiling at him._

_“Why won’t you die?!” Jason bellowed, masking his fear with rage._

_“Because this is your fault. Not mine.” The Governor replied with a laugh. “You’re the one who needs to be punished. You did this.”_

It was the middle of the night. Completely dark except for the moonlight. Alexandria was silent except for the chirping of crickets and the buzz of cicadas outside. The group appeared to be asleep in the living room around him as Rick got up. He hadn’t slept, too paranoid to let his guard down even for a second. They could be in a death trap and he had to be ready.

As he got up, he noticed that the light sheets they were using as covers were no longer covering Jason and Carl as they slept side by side. Rick quickly pulled the covers back over them before making his way into the kitchen. He opened the cutlery drawer and pulled out the largest knife he could find. He checked the blade, still sharp. Rick quietly closed the drawer and kept the knife in his hand, he’d feel better having an extra blade at hand should anything happen.

As he returned to the living room he saw Jason shaking and muttering in his sleep. His hair was damp with sweat and his face was contorted in anguish. Rick got down on one knee next to him and shook the older teen’s shoulder. After shaking him repeatedly for a few seconds, Jason shot up and reached for his knife, his eyes darting round the room before finally resting on Rick. He stared at Rick in confusion as he panted.

“Easy. I think you were having a nightmare.” Rick whispered, keeping a hold of his shoulder.

Jason leaned forward and held his forehead in his hand for a moment, closing his eyes and thinking about the nightmare. It had been awful and hadn’t made any sense. Looking around he could see that Alexandria was still standing. No fires. No smoke. No rubble. No attackers. No walkers. No death. Jason opened his eyes and turned his head to look at Carl, checking that he too was still alive and well. He relaxed upon seeing Carl’s relaxed face, eyes closed as he slept peacefully beside him.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” Rick asked, not missing the look of concern on Jason’s face.

“Everyone died.” Jason replied lowly, his breath shaky. “You. _Carl_. Everyone.”

“We’re still here.” Rick answered, rubbing the older teen’s back. “I’ll stay awake so nothing happens. Get some sleep.”

Jason nodded weakly and lay back down. He pulled the sheet back over him before turning on his side and snuggling closer to Carl, one arm draped over the younger boy’s chest. Rick couldn’t help but smile at the display of affection before laying back down himself. They had a long day ahead of them in the morning.

 

Sunlight streamed through the windows and onto Carl’s face. The heat from the sun slowly woke him from his peaceful slumber, causing him to scrunch up his face and lift his hand to cover his eyes from the intrusive rays. He instantly felt an arm pull him closer against a body behind him as a pair of lips found the back of his neck.

“Morning.” Jason greeted quietly in his ear.

Carl smiled and shuffled closer to Jason. “Morning.” He replied groggily before yawning.

“Come with me.” Jason whispered in Carl’s ear before removing himself from the younger.

Carl felt cold at the lack of contact and rolled onto his back before sitting up. Everyone else was asleep except for his father who was missing. Jason beckoned Carl towards the stairs and with a groan at the movement, Carl got up and followed him.

Jason lead Carl into one of the bedrooms, the one that Jason had mentioned he wanted to be theirs. On the windowsill sat two bowls of cereal and a carton of milk. The window itself was wide open. Jason grasped Carl’s hand and took him to the windowsill to lift a bowl before guiding him out the window. Jason followed him with his own bowl and the milk before sitting down on the roof, looking out at the empty streets of Alexandria.

The sun was just rising in the sky, it was very early in the morning. Jason poured some milk into his own bowl of cereal before handing Carl the milk so he could do the same. They sat together on the roof and started eating their breakfast. The birds chirped in the trees around them but apart from that there were no other sounds. It was a peaceful morning.

“What’s this for?” Carl asked him, his curiosity breaking the silence.

“This is how we spent our first day together, remember?” Jason asked him with a smile. “Sitting on the roof while you ate your chocolate pudding.”

Carl beamed back at the memory, amazed that they had come so far since then.

“I had a nightmare last night and it just got me thinking.” Jason told him after ten minutes of silence had passed.

“About what?” Carl asked, both about the nightmare and his thoughts.

“Us. I want to spend as much time with you as possible.” Jason replied. “I don’t want to ever lose you, but if I did, I don’t want to have regrets.”

“You’re not going to lose me.” Carl told him firmly.

“In my nightmare, people came and destroyed this place.” Jason explained. “I found you too late. You were a walker.”

Carl’s face fell as Jason explained his nightmare. It hurt Carl to see how upset Jason was from something that hadn’t even really happened. It had obviously been one of those nightmares that felt all too real.

“And it scares me because that could happen.” Jason finished. “All of it could come true.”

Carl shuffled closer to him and held Jason’s hand. He rested his head against Jason’s shoulder. Jason tilted his head so it rested against the top of Carl’s head and squeezed Carl’s hand.

“We’re safe in here.” Carl finally spoke. “Nothing’s going to happen to you or me.”

“I hope you’re right.” Jason muttered, enjoying the sunrise and the gentle embrace.

 

“You look a lot younger now.” Carl commented with wide eyes.

Between breakfast and midday, Jason had gone exploring on his own and had found Jessie. As a result he had asked if he could have his haircut and the pretty young woman had obliged. Jason now stood in front of Carl with clean clothes, clean shaven and with the same style of hair but much shorter. His left bang was longer than the right but even so it only came down to the midpoint of his eye, therefore it no longer obscured his vision in any way.

“Maybe less people will complain.” Jason commented. “It’s kinda why I got it cut.”

Carl was about to answer but Rick interrupted. The rest of the group by this point had all eaten, washed up and were ready to explore the community of Alexandria properly.

“Carl, you wanna take Judith in her stroller?” Rick asked his son.

Carl loved being able to take care of Judith and quickly nodded in agreement. Jason smiled and followed his younger lover as they headed out the door and onto the street. Most of the group kept to the pavement while Carl pushed the stroller up the road with Jason by his side.

Daryl remained on the porch of the house. He didn’t want to go anywhere as he was uncomfortable in the surroundings. Rick stopped before heading out and turned to him.

“They said explore, so let’s explore.” Rick told him.

“Nah, I’ll stay.” Daryl refused.

Rick nodded. “Alright.”

Rick stepped forward to the edge of the staircase and watched as the group made their way up the road. It all seemed so mundane and normal. A group of friends walking up the road, his son pushing his little sister in her stroller. It wasn’t what the apocalypse had looked like for the past two years.

“Lori and me, we used to drive through neighbourhoods like this.” Rick told Daryl, reminiscing on the past. “Thinking “one day”…”

“Well, here we are.” Daryl replied somewhat sarcastically.

“We’ll be back.” Rick replied and headed out onto the street.

As Jason and Carl walked past the small park with a pond that was in the centre of Alexandria they heard a bark. They instinctively spun to face the bark with Jason reaching for his knife that he continued to carry on his belt. They relaxed when a chocolate Labrador bounded up to them out of curiosity, a black haired woman jogging after it.

Jason got down on his knees on the grass as the dog reached him and rubbed the sides of its neck and head with his hands. He greeted the dog with playful hellos as it stared at him and sniffed his scent, taking in all the information it needed on the newcomer. The woman who was the dog’s owner finally caught up to them.

“Sorry about that.” She apologised. “He’s only two years old so he’s still a bit of a pup.”

“It’s fine.” Carl replied with a friendly grin.

“You just wanna play, don’t you, boy?” Jason asked the dog playfully.

Jason darted to his right and rolled around on the grass with the dog, the chocolate lab often ending up on top of him and licking his face or barking in amusement. He played with the dog in different ways, playfully tickling its underside, letting it chase his hands in an effort to playfully bite them or having a gentle tug of war with a thin tree branch.

Both Carl and the dog’s owner watched on with fascination and amusement. Although the dog was playful, the woman had never seen anyone get on so well with her dog that quickly. Carl couldn’t help but grin and feel his heart flutter in his chest. There was something wonderful about watching Jason play so light heartedly with the dog, mainly because it offered Carl a glimpse into who Jason used to be. He had mentioned feeding tiger cubs and working with animals before, so it was hardly a surprise that he could play with a dog so well. The thing he loved most was the large grin plastered on Jason’s face throughout the playing.

After a few more minutes Jason had tired himself out a fair bit and the same could be said for the dog. They both returned to their respective companions, panting from the exertion and the heat.

“Looks like you’ve made a friend already.” The woman commented. “I’m Trisha, and that’s Brodie.”

Jason shook her hand as he got his breath back. “I’m Jason and this is Carl.”

“And who’s this little cutie?” Trisha asked, waving to Judith.

“That’s my sister, Judith.” Carl told her with a friendly smile.

“How old is she?” Trisha asked, curious.

“About eight months, I think?” Carl answered.

“And you’ve been out there that whole time?” Trisha asked, amazed.

Both Jason and Carl nodded. Trisha was stunned into silence. Their group must have been truly something else in order to keep a baby alive during the apocalypse for eight whole months at the very least. Judith started to vocalise her boredom.

“We should get going.” Carl told her, moving the stroller a few steps. “It was nice meeting you.”

“You too.” Trisha replied with a wave before guiding her dog back into the park.

Rick made his way up the road. He spotted Jessie with her two sons heading back to their house at the top of the street when it dawned on him. Everyone had disappeared. More importantly, Carl, Jason and Judith were nowhere to be seen. His eyes scanned the area but he couldn’t find a single trace of them.

Rick started running up the junction at the top of the street, constantly looking around for them but still there was nothing. An almost eerie silence had fallen over the community and it made him panic. Had they been taken? Jason would protect Carl but if they had been taken at gunpoint then he wouldn’t have had a chance.

He took the left turn and ran to the end of that road. Looking around some more he still couldn’t find them, so Rick took off running down the left street, round the back of their own houses. They had to be somewhere, they couldn’t have vanished or been taken far in such a short frame of time. If any of them had been hurt Rick didn’t care what he had to do or who he had to kill. As he ran at full speed, he crashed into something metallic that was sticking out from one of the garages. Jessie appeared from the garage, catching his fearful gaze.

“Rick, you okay?” She asked, concerned.

“Did Carl, Judith and Jason walk by?” Rick asked her, his voice wobbling with worry. “We went out, they were ahead of me and…”

Rick was panting from fear and exertion. Jessie remained calm, however.

“It’s okay, I think I know where they are.” She told him and led him up the street.

After a two minute walk they came upon one of the houses closest to the perimeter wall. On the porch was an elderly couple who had their attention focused on Judith who sat in Carl’s arms. Beside Carl stood Jason, who raised a hand in acknowledgement towards Rick after having spotted him.

“That’s Bob and Natalie Miller. They had five kids and twelve grandkids.” Jessie explained. “It’s been a long time since anyone around here has seen a baby. She’s gonna have to put up with some pinched cheeks.”

Rick’s breathing slowly calmed down. “Thanks, uh, I just...”

“It’s okay.” Jessie replied, knowing that he was still in survival mode. “I get it.”

“Look, I’m sorry I broke whatever that was I broke.” Rick apologised awkwardly.

“It’s a sculpture I’m making with the boys.” Jessie replied, smiling. “It’s an owl, well, it will be. I just can’t get the eyes right.”

“Right, the eyes.” Rick nodded, awkwardly trying to keep the conversation going.

“You didn’t even get a good look at it.” Jessie answered with a shake of her head.

Rick sighed. “I was in the middle of losing my mind. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” Jessie replied with a nod.

Rick turned and made his way towards the Miller house, deciding it best for his sanity if he joins his family.

“Hey, Rick.” Jessie called from behind him, stopping him. “Would it be okay if Carl came over now? Ron really wants to meet him.”

Rick smiled and nodded before heading towards Carl, Jason, Judith and the Miller couple. Jessie headed back to her own house to give Ron the good news.

Jason nodded to Rick as he reached the porch and shook the hands of Bob and Natalie.

“I’m Rick.” Rick introduced himself to them. “Her father.”

“I’m Natalie and this is my husband, Bob.” Natalie introduced with a cheerful smile. “You have such a beautiful daughter.”

“We never thought we’d ever see another baby.” Bob told him. “You’re an incredible man, Rick.”

“How’s that?” Rick asked, narrowing his eyes.

“Your son told us some of the things you’ve been through to keep her alive.” Natalie answered.

“You’re the definition of a father, Rick.” Bob added.

“Thanks.” Rick replied, unsure of how to respond to such compliments.

“So, where to now?” Jason asked Carl quietly.

This prompted Rick to turn to them. “Carl, Jessie’s son Ron wants to meet you. Why don’t you go round there?”

“What about Judith?” Carl asked, still cradling his sister in his arms.

“I’ll take her.” Rick answered. “Go and try to have some fun.”

Carl smiled and nodded, handing Judith over to her father. As Carl headed off the porch, Jason and Rick shared a look. No words had to be spoken as they had been said before. It was the silent request to keep Carl safe and the silent promise to do just that.

 

“We’re almost always here after school so you can come by any time.” Ron told Carl and Jason as he led them down the hall towards his room.

Ron was slightly taller than Carl, with lighter and longer hair. He dressed casually, jeans, a shirt and a thin long sleeved jacket.

“You go to school?” Carl asked, amazed.

“It’s in a garage.” Ron explained. “Little kids go in the morning and then it’s us in the afternoon. I mean, probably you too, right?”

Carl thought for a moment, still surprised. “Probably.”

Jason decided to remain silent on the fact that he’d be a teacher at their school. He didn’t want things to be awkward right away with Carl’s new friends. He could hear the unmistakable sounds of a videogame coming from the bedroom as they crossed the threshold and entered it. There was a girl with long brown hair sitting on the bed reading a book and in front of the television was a boy with black hair dressed in a grey jumper.

“Guys, this is Carl and Jason.” Ron introduced the pair to them. “This is Mikey and Enid.”

“Hey.” Mikey greeted, standing up and walking over to them.

Enid remained engrossed in her book. “Hi.”

Carl stared at Enid with curiosity. She was the first girl he had seen since the prison and she was the first one who was his age. Despite her dour expression and uninterested tone of voice, she was attractive. She seemed different from the others. Ron placed his hand on her shoulder.

“Enid’s from outside too.” He explained. “She just came a few months ago.”

Enid finally turned her head to look at Carl and Jason. Carl was surprised that a girl like her had survived outside the walls and by the sounds of things, had been alone when she came to Alexandria. Jason leaned against the doorframe and folded his arms. He was trying to get a feel of her by studying her eyes and expression but he was finding it difficult. She wasn’t like the others.

“Oh, um…is this yours?” Carl asked them all, holding out the comic he had found in the second house.

“Oh, sorry. We didn’t know you guys got that house.” Ron answered.

“We mostly hang out there and listen to music.” Mikey added.

Jason turned his eyes to Mikey. He figured the music wasn’t going to be anything from the sixties, otherwise Mikey would have already been teased for looking like a Beatles member with his haircut. Jason decided it best not to point that out.

“That’s Enid’s.” Mikey finished.

Before he had finished the statement, Enid reached out and grabbed the comic from Carl’s hands before dropping it on the bed beside her. She returned her attention to her book. Carl’s gaze remained fixated on her for a few more seconds before Ron got his attention.

“Wanna play some videogames?” He offered, gesturing to the television. “Or Mikey’s house has a pool table but his dad’s kinda strict about it so…”

“It’s okay.” Mikey commented. “He’s at work.”

Jason had to admit to himself that he was curious what videogames they actually had. It had been a long time since he had played any, the last time felt like a lifetime ago. His heart caught in his throat as he realised the last videogame he had ever played had been with Kellin. Jason squeezed his eyes shut and forced the pain to the back of his mind.

Carl was frozen in place. He didn’t know what to say. This was all so natural for them to be playing videogames, going to school and hanging out listening to music. It was as if he and Jason had walked through a portal in time to before the apocalypse had happened. These were regular teenagers in front of them, not brutalised survivors of a global catastrophe. He had missed out on being a regular teenager because of the world ending.

“Sorry, I guess we come on kinda strong.” Ron apologised. “Um, we can just hang out.”

“You guys don’t even have to talk if you don’t wanna.” Mikey added.

“Yeah.” Ron continued. “Took Enid three weeks to say something.”

Noticing Carl’s hesitation, Jason placed his hands on Carl’s shoulders, standing behind him. He lowered his mouth down to Carl’s ear as he rubbed his shoulders.

“Hey, this is what you wanted, remember?” Jason whispered in Carl’s ear. “You wanted to be a regular teenager. This is your chance.”

Jason rubbed his shoulders some more and returned to his full height.

“Just give him a minute.” Jason told them, revealing that he was personally fine.

“Pull it together, sport.” Enid commented dryly, turning back to her book.

Jason shot her a glare. She might have been from outside the walls but he doubted she had faced anything close to what the Termites had been liked. He knew she would have pain, everyone carried something with them but he doubted her pain was so great that she could take an attitude like that to Carl. Jason sighed to relax himself, realising his fist was clenched tightly, though he couldn’t remember clenching it in the first place.

“Let’s um, let’s play some videogames.” Carl finally said and made his way towards the television.

“Cool.” Ron replied. “Yeah…”

Jason smiled and followed him. “What games have you got for four players?”

“We have Super Smash Bros Brawl on the Wii.” Ron began his list.

Jason interrupted him. “That’s perfect.”

“You’ve played it before?” Mikey asked, a little surprised.

“I’m older than all of you.” Jason informed him. “I played it before everything happened.”

“Is it a good game?” Carl asked, curious and not really knowing anything about them.

“It’s a fantastic game, which is why it should be your first.” Jason replied with a wink. “You never forget your first.”

Carl looked at the floor quickly to hide his blush. None of the others knew Jason and Carl were even together. After Jason’s warning the day before he didn’t want to tempt fate and lose these new friends right away. As they all sat down and took their controllers in their hands, Jason couldn’t help but let out a sadistic laugh.

“You guys better be pretty good.” He warned them. “Or I’m going to flatten you with Captain Falcon.”

 

Later in the evening, Jason and Carl lay on the bed that Jason had declared was theirs. Jason lay back on the bed with Carl laying back on top of him. Jason’s hands rubbed Carl’s chest and tummy soothingly and absentmindedly as he breathed in Carl’s scent. He knew he was incredibly lucky to have Carl as his and even more so to be in a place like Alexandria with him instead of fighting for survival all the time. He gently kissed Carl’s ear as they talked.

“You had fun, didn’t you?” Jason asked him, referring to Ron’s house.

“Yeah.” Carl replied with a sigh. “I don’t think Ron and Mikey enjoyed getting beaten though.”

Jason chuckled. “No, or how I kept whispering tips and tricks to you so you didn’t always lose.”

“I didn’t mind, it was just a game.” Carl told him with a shrug. “I had fun.”

“And that’s the important thing, having fun.” Jason commented.

“Is this what it’s going to be like now?” Carl pondered aloud.

“It can be.” Jason told him. “If we want it to be.”

“What about our relationship?” Carl asked, concerned. “I don’t want to have to hide it.”

“We don’t have to.” Jason replied. “I just want to get to know everyone first.”

Jason’s fingers rested on Carl’s nipples, pressing and rubbing them through his shirt and causing him to sigh in pleasure. It was soft but it was pleasant, especially with Jason gently kissing the top of his neck near his jaw. He was about to let his hands wander further but the sound of approaching footsteps and the doorknob turning caused him to stop.

Rick opened the door, peering in to check that they were there and weren’t asleep. When he was met with both teens staring at him he relaxed and stepped inside.

“Hey, how was Ron’s house?” He asked them, sitting on the edge of the bed.

Jason couldn’t help but snigger. It had been destruction if they referred to the videogames. He had won every match.

“What do you think of this place?” Carl asked his father, his thoughts more on his conversation with Jason.

“Well, I think it seems…” Rick trailed off, trying to find the right word. “Nice.”

“Yeah. I like it here.” Carl answered.

“As do I.” Jason added. “After so long on the road, even before I met you two, I can’t complain about being in a place like this.”

“And I like the people but they’re weak.” Carl continued. “And I don’t want us to get weak too.”

Rick nodded, staring at his son. He was right.

“We won’t get weak.” Jason commented. “I honestly think we’re passed that now.”

“But they’re still weak.” Carl argued. “And I don’t want to get too used to this, just in case…”

Jason thought for a moment and nodded. “Deanna was right when she said she needed us.”

Rick nodded in agreement. “They need people who know what the world is now.”

“What she doesn’t realise is that we need them just as much.” Jason added, earning a confused look from Rick and Carl.

“Why?” Rick rasped, trying to figure out what point Jason was trying to make.

“We were almost out there too long. We were almost too far gone.” Jason explained. “The person I used to be almost died out there. I’m glad to have him back.”

Rick nodded. Jason did have a point. It was all about balance. Too much complacency and they could get weak or killed. Too much survivalist paranoia and they could lose themselves to the monsters inside them.

Rick stood up and headed for the door. “Dinner will be ready soon, don’t fall asleep or do _anything else_.”

Jason stared back at Rick who had a small smirk clinging to the corner of his mouth. “I have no idea what you mean by that, Mr. Grimes.”

Rick let out an amused grunt before closing the door behind him.

 

_The birds sang a cheerful chorus, a song that was a contradiction to the harsh reality of the new world. For the birds nothing had really changed but for the few people remaining life was now a nightmare filled with hungry monsters. The sky was a clear blue, not a single cloud could be seen for miles allowing the sun to shine over the whole area, illuminating the lush green of the vegetation and making the water of the lake sparkle with its warm rays._

_Jason threw a stone, skipping it across the surface of the water. This lake was isolated from any known roads and paths and had some of the clearest water he’d ever seen. Every time he would skip a stone across the surface the fish below would scatter and swim to the safety of deeper water. The birds in the tree branches above him continued to sing their afternoon song which to him always sounded happy no matter what was happening around them._

_He took a break from skipping the stones and cupped some of the water in his hands before throwing it over his head, wetting his hair and face in an attempt to cool down under the sun’s unrelenting blasts of heat. He lay back on the grass with the back of his head in his hands and stared up at the clear blue sky. Even though the dead had risen and started eating the living, there was nothing but peace at the lake._

_“Remember when we used to come here?” Kellin, who lay beside him asked. “I mean, before all of this.”_

_Jason continued to look at the sky but a smile did cross his face._

_“Yeah, I remember. We used to swim together all the time.” He grinned at the memory. “But we can’t do that right now. We can’t risk the noise.”_

_“Can’t risk the noise, or can’t risk it ending the way it always did?” Came the suggestive reply._

_Jason laughed lightly. “Both.”_

_“Kinda sucks, you know, how we can’t have that kind of fun.” Kellin replied with disappointment lacing his tone._

_Jason turned his head to face him. “No. No it doesn’t suck.”_

_His gaze was returned by Kellin, his blonde hair reflecting the sunlight. “Why not?”_

_Jason reached out and took one of Kellin’s hands in his hand. “Because all around us people are dying, the dead have risen to eat the living and the world is over.” He explained, giving his hand a squeeze. “But we’re here. Together. Right now. That doesn’t suck.”_

_“But what if that changes?” Kellin asked him, fear in his voice. “What if something happens?”_

_Jason squeezed his hand tighter. “Nothing will happen.”_

_“How can you be so sure?”_

_Jason kissed him softly. “Because I’ll always protect you and keep us safe. I promise.”_

_Kellin’s breathing was slowing as the infection took its toll and zapped the light from him. His grasp on Jason’s hand had also weakened. It was just about time. The song had ended and their time together was also finally at an end._

_Jason kissed Kellin’s forehead and stroked his hair out of his face. His face had gone pale._

_“I love you. I love you so much and I always will.” Jason told him, squeezing his hand as his tears continued to fall._

_“I love you too. Always.” Kellin replied weakly. He smiled. That same smile Jason had fallen in love with the first time they met._

_Kellin’s breathing stopped and his grip on Jason finally loosened. He was gone. Just like that, the most important person in Jason’s life, the only reason he had made it this far, was gone. The last person in the world that he was prepared to lose now lay dead in his arms. Jason wailed with grief, his tears falling on Kellin’s lifeless face._

_As much as he wanted to just sit there and cry himself to sleep he still had something important to do. There was still a promise to keep. Jason pulled out the gun that Kellin had given him and flicked the safety off. He aimed it at Kellin’s head, his hand shaking rapidly as he continued to cry. This one simply muscle movement of pulling the trigger was the hardest thing Jason had ever been forced to do. He held his breath._

_“I’m sorry.”_

_Jason pulled the trigger and shot Kellin’s lifeless body in the head. Reanimation had been prevented. Now he was alone. Nothing would change that. No one would change that. He had to keep his promise. He had to continue living. Jason examined the gun. It was empty. That had been the last bullet. He threw the gun on the floor and held Kellin’s body in his arm and continued to cry._

_Rick turned to Carl and pulled his son in for a tight hug. He often didn’t show much physical affection to Carl but there was always that chance that he could die in Atlanta. He wanted to make sure Carl wasn’t still angry with him and that his son knew how much he loved him. He broke the embrace and turned to Jason, who stood silently watching. Rick placed his hand on Jason’s shoulder and gave it a reassuring squeeze._

_“Keep him safe.” Rick told him. “I’m trusting you with his life.”_

_Jason placed one of his hands on top of Rick’s hand and nodded. “I promise.”_

_“Where’s Carl?!” Jason bellowed furiously, aiming at Phillip’s head._

_“You want him?” The Governor asked with a sadistic grin. “Here, have him.”_

_The Governor pushed a smaller figure from behind him towards Jason. Ripped jeans. Torn shirt. The sheriff hat falling apart. It was Carl. Carl stumbled towards Jason before looking at him. Jason felt his blood run cold. That one look into his eyes shattered Jason’s heart into a million pieces. Carl’s glazed, dead eyes looked at him as he snarled and stumbled forward. He was dead. Phillip had left him to turn into a walker._

_Jason collapsed to his knees and dropped his gun. He couldn’t. He had failed. Carl was dead. Everyone was dead. Everyone that had kept him alive was gone. Carl was the only reason he had lasted so long. He had promised Carl that he’d always keep him safe. He had failed. He had lost him. He had been too weak, too slow, and too stupid._

_Carl’s corpse descended upon him, snarling with outstretched arms. Jason instinctively grabbed him by his neck and held him at arm’s length. It was a struggle as he didn’t even want to. He had no energy left._

_“You know, he kept telling me that you’d come to save him.” The Governor teased venomously. “Said you loved him too much to abandon him.”_

 

Jason’s eyes shot open, a cold sweat running down his forehead which he quickly wiped away with the back of his hand. He turned his head to the side to check that Carl was still there and as expected he was. The younger teen slept soundly on his back. Jason let out a sigh as he let the remnants of the nightmare fade back into his subconscious.

A shadow caught his peripheral vision, making him sit up and look at the living room windows. Rick stood in front of the window, looking out at the street with Michonne beside him.

“Deanna hasn’t given me a job yet.” Michonne stated quietly.

“Do you want one?” Rick asked, turning to look at her.

“Yeah.” Michonne answered. “Do you?”

“Well that’s signing the papers.” Rick commented suspiciously. “That’s saying, yes, this is how it is.”

“You afraid to do that?” Michonne questioned, sensing his paranoia.

“Are you?” Rick asked in return.

“No.” Michonne stated firmly.

“So then why are we both awake?” Rick asked rhetorically.

Rick let that question hang in the air. They both knew why they were both awake. Their survival instincts were still very active and very suspicious of their surroundings.

“I’m gonna take a walk.” Rick told her and grabbed his jacket, heading for the door.

Jason lay back down so neither of them would know he was awake. It may not have been a particularly private conversation but he didn’t want to seem like an eavesdropper anyway. Michonne lay back down and attempted to sleep again. Jason waited for a few more minutes before rising to his feet as silently as he could, grabbing his jacket and heading outside after Rick.

Rick headed down the street with his jacket zipped up and his hands in his pockets. The night time air was cool and was a stark contrast to the warmth of a large house. He was having trouble believing that the place was real and genuine. How they could have survived for so long without another group destroying the place was food for thought. They must have been the luckiest group of people to ever walk the Earth.

“You’re Rick.” A man’s voice interrupted his thoughts.

Rick turned to see the silhouette of a man on the porch of Jessie’s house. He sat back in his chair and smoked a cigarette, the darkness obscuring his face.

“Yeah.” Rick answered.

“My wife cut your hair.” The man stated, identifying himself.

Rick stared at him, waiting for a follow up to the comment. Was there a problem with her cutting Rick’s hair that he hadn’t been told about beforehand?

“Yeah.” Rick answered again, unsure of where the conversation was headed.

“Welcome to Alexandria.” Jessie’s husband replied before taking a long draw of his cigarette.

Rick nodded before continuing his walk down the road. After a few minutes of walking he heard footsteps behind him, they were obvious in the silent darkness of the night. Rick stopped walking and reached for his knife before turning around. A few metres behind him stood Jason with his hands raised.

“Relax, it’s me.” Jason greeted as he lowered his hands.

“You can’t sleep either?” Rick asked him as they started walking in tandem.

“Another nightmare.” Jason replied. “Not the same reason as you.”

“What do you mean?” Rick asked, trying to hide his suspicions.

“I know you don’t trust this place. I get it.” Jason explained, deciding to be blunt and honest with the man. “But I truly believe this is genuine. They’re just naïve, weak and stupid.”

“If we’re gonna stay here, that all needs to change.” Rick told him sternly.

“And it will.” Jason replied. “I think that’s why they brought us here in the first place.”

Rick nodded. If they were going to try something they surely would have attempted it by now. All the signs did point to it all being true if he pushed aside his paranoia.

“What about Carl?” Rick asked, changing the subject. “How are things with you and him?”

“It’s going great.” Jason replied with a smile. “We’re both happy and this place has allowed us to be more of a couple.”

“What were you before, then?” Rick asked.

“I mean, we can act more like a couple.” Jason explained. “Before, the focus was survival first, relationship second. Now it’s the other way around.”

“As long as he’s happy, I don’t have a problem with it.” Rick told Jason before glaring at him. “But if you hurt him, I’ll still kill you.”

Jason smiled, he knew Rick was past the point of actually killing him unless he murdered Carl or something equally horrific.

“I know how protective you are, so I wanted to ask you something.” Jason told him, his hands in his pockets and his head down, nerves shaking through him.

“So ask.” Rick replied with a shrug.

“If we are going to stay here, I’d like to share a room and therefore a bed with Carl.” Jason told him. “I know that Carl would like that too but in the end it’s your call.”

“Is this for sleeping arrangements or sex?” Rick asked bluntly, too tired to care for his wording.

Jason’s legs shook nervously as the hint of a blush crossed his cheeks, obscured by the darkness around them.

“It’s mainly for sleeping, but when Carl feels like he’s ready then yes, for sex too.” Jason replied honestly. “But I repeat, it’s up to you, Rick. I’m not going to lie to you or hide anything.”

Rick thought for a moment. The idea of Carl and sex was something he didn’t really want to think about as it was easier when his son was innocent. Rick had been young before and he knew that innocence never lasted. It was a relief that Jason was as caring and mature as he was as it allowed Rick to trust him more.

Rick finally nodded his head. “Okay.”

“Thanks, Rick.” Jason replied with a sigh of relief. “This means a lot, trust me.”

Rick smiled and looked around at the silent streets. “We should get back. Try to sleep some more.”

 

“This is the garage where we hold the school classes.” Deanna told Jason as she led him into a large garage.

Inside the garage were about a dozen study chairs with writing pads attached to their arms. Most of the chairs were occupied by the older children of Alexandria, such as Ron and Mikey. There was a whiteboard on wheels at the back of the garage that the teacher used to explain things to the class.

From inside the house, a woman emerged from the inside garage door to greet them. Jason instantly recognised her as Trisha from the day before.

“Trisha, good afternoon.” Jason greeted, shaking her hand.

“You two have already met I see.” Deanna commented with a smile.

“Yeah, but we didn’t know that we’d be working together.” Trisha replied.

“Well, I’ll let you both get on with it.” Deanna answered before leaving the garage to continue her own work elsewhere.

“So, what’s the plan?” Jason asked, his hands in his jacket pockets.

“I figured this afternoon you could just sit in and watch.” Trisha told him. “See how I run the class and what topics we cover. That way you’ll know the routine.”

Jason nodded. “Fair enough.”

Trisha smiled. “Okay then, I’ll take the register and then I’ll introduce you to the class.”

 

The front gate of Alexandria opened so that Rick could step out. He had his Colt Python holstered on his hip and a bag strapped around his shoulder. He kept one hand on his gun and the other on the handle of his machete as the gate closed behind him. He walked along the perimeter wall, checking the support beams and the steel sheets themselves. Everything appeared to be fine.

Rick continued on past the burnt out buildings that lay in ruins on the front road toward the gate. He had told them that he was going out to check the perimeter and to familiarise himself with the area. In reality, he was going to get his spare gun that he had left in the blender cup. He’d feel safer with a concealed gun they had no knowledge of.

 

Carl sat in the living room of their house. He didn’t feel like going to the first of the school classes as he felt intimidated by the whole thing. He hadn’t been to any form of school nor had he studied anything for the past two years except for survival. The others had been studying for a while and he didn’t want to look like an idiot.

He played with the sand timer on the coffee table. The other reason he didn’t go was because he didn’t see the need. He could read and write and he knew basic maths. Those were all the educational skills he needed for the apocalyptic world. The rest that he needed to know were practical things, like gun handling, supply conservation and the fortification of wherever he stayed. Those were the important things.

Carl looked out the window and sighed. He was bored and lonely. He didn’t know where Jason was as the older teen had mysteriously declined to tell him what the day’s plans were. He didn’t want to leave the house and bother any of the others either. Carl wasn’t some pesky kid anymore.

As he continued to look out the window he noticed someone walking through the grass. Once he focused his gaze on them he realised it was Enid, she was wearing a backpack and was heading for the perimeter wall. He watched her through the window with fascination as she used thick sticks to create footholds on the wall so she could climb it. Within two minutes she had scaled the wall and disappeared over the other side.

Carl knew that she had come from outside and could probably handle herself but he was curious. He had nothing else to do so he grabbed his iconic hat and made sure his knife was sheathed on his belt before rushing out the house to follow her.

 

“Ron, do you know where Enid is?” Trisha asked the boy as she looked at the class.

Ron shrugged. “She said she’d be here…”

“What about Carl?” Trisha asked. “Has anyone seen him?”

“I saw him at the house this morning.” Jason told her. “I’m not sure why he isn’t here.”

“Could you do me a favour and go find him?” Trisha requested. “I suspect he’s a little anxious about his first day.”

Jason nodded. “Sure thing, I’ll be back soon.”

Jason waved goodbye to the class as he left the garage. Once he was out on the street he took off at a jogging pace towards their house. It wasn’t like Carl to not show up but he assumed Trisha was probably right. Carl was having a tough time adjusting to this new way of life and it would make sense that he wouldn’t show up at the class. Jason also suspected that Carl didn’t see the need to go, as he himself was struggling to justify its worth in his own mind.

As Jason reached the house he looked around just in time to see Carl dropping over the other side of the wall. Jason narrowed his eyes in curiosity and confusion. Why was Carl sneaking out of the community? Without a second’s hesitation he ran for the wall. He’d just have to find him and ask him directly. Jason cursed under his breath. His gut instinct told him that Enid and Carl missing class at the same time wasn’t a coincidence.

 

Carl followed Enid through the thick woodland as she calmly made her way through it. He didn’t know where she was going or why she was outside the walls in the first place, so he kept his distance. He was far enough away so that she wouldn’t hear him but close enough that he wouldn’t lose sight of her.

He kept his knife firmly in his hand. Walkers could appear from anywhere and if it was a group then she would need help. He couldn’t just let her wander around outside on her own. To survive you needed to be around people, you couldn’t make it on your own anymore. The world was too dangerous.

She suddenly took off running, prompting Carl to jump out from his hiding spot behind a thick tree to run after her. Once he reached the clearing she had been walking in he sighed in defeat. She was gone. Enid had vanished like some kind of ghost. Carl was disappointed in himself for letting her slip away. If anything happened it would be his fault for being careless.

 

Rick continued on his journey towards the shed he had left the gun by. The sun was getting low in the sky signalling that there weren’t many hours of daylight left. He would need to quickly get the gun and get back before anyone got suspicious.

The dull echo of an empty oil drum being knocked over caused Rick to spin around and aim his revolver off to his left. A single walker came stumbling out of an old storage shed, snarling as it caught sight of him. Rick lowered his gun and continued walking in the opposite direction from the walker. Gunshots would attract more of them and a single walker wasn’t much of a threat anyway.

Rick finally arrived at the shed where he had hidden his gun. He quickly made his way over to the blender cup and opened it. He froze. It was empty. Someone had seen him put it there. Someone knew he had a backup plan and had taken it away from him. They had either done it to stop him doing something rash or they had done it because his suspicions were accurate. It was hard to tell which one was the real scenario.

The chorus of snarls coming up behind him told him that the single walker had not only followed him all the way to the shed but it had also brought company. Rick holstered his revolver and dropped his bag to the ground before pulling out his knife. He turned his head to the right at the sound of someone approaching. Carl appeared from behind the shed, surprised to find his father also outside the walls. Rick was surprised to find Carl outside the walls. There was no time for discussion as the walkers were closing in on them. Carl unsheathed his knife and stood beside his father as they prepared themselves for the incoming group of hungry corpses.

“Get ready.” Rick told him.

The first walker reached Rick, forcing him to grab hold of it by the neck before stabbing it in the forehead. Carl used what Jason had taught him and kicked the second walker in the knee, dropping it to the ground so he could easily stab it in the head. The third walker got close to Rick and received a knife to the temple as a reward. Another walker went for Carl who simply held out his knife and let the walker stagger itself into the blade. He pushed the knife into the skull before pushing the body back onto the ground.

The fifth walker rushed up to Rick who grabbed it by the neck. This one was fresher and stronger than the others, forcing Rick back a couple steps. Suddenly a walker’s hand shot out from underneath the pile of broken items next to the shed and grabbed Rick’s ankle. While he struggled with those two walkers, Carl had problems of his own. Two walkers had closed in on Carl at the same time, forcing him to hold them back with each hand leaving him unable to harm them.

Before either of them could try anything daring to save themselves, the sound of rushing footsteps crashed through the leaf litter towards them. The walkers turned their heads to the sound. The walker Rick had a hold of received a hunting knife to the side of the head as Jason charged past towards Carl. Once he reached Carl he grabbed both walkers and pulled them off balance and onto the ground. Jason unsheathed his machete and split the head of one walker in half while Carl stabbed the last one.

Rick grabbed a metal pipe and prepared to kill the final walker that was snarling up at them from its place under the pile. Carl got beside him and stretched out his arm.

“Dad.” Carl said, wordlessly asking to be handed the pipe.

Rick handed Carl the pipe and allowed him to quickly shove it through the walker’s skull, killing it instantly. Silence returned to the woodland around the three of them as they all caught their breath.

Carl finally turned to Jason. “What are you doing out here?”

Jason sheathed his machete and knife. “You skipped class. I came to find you.”

“How’d you know I wasn’t at class?” Carl asked, surprised.

Jason smiled. “I forgot to mention. I’m going to be the new teacher come tomorrow.”

“Oh!” Carl gasped out. “So that’s where you were.”

Jason nodded. It was the whole reason he hadn’t told Carl where he was going because he wanted to surprise him just for the sake of it. That plan had been quickly ruined by whatever compelled Carl to skip class and leave the community.

“What brought you out here?” Jason turned the question back at his boyfriend.

“I saw Enid climb the wall but I lost sight of her.” Carl admitted, suddenly embarrassed about the whole thing.

Jason felt his gut twist, as if the instincts that lay within were telling him that they had been right all along. It felt like he had been taunted. He shrugged it off.

“Well, she’s probably fine because I haven’t heard any screams or anything.” Jason told him to reassure him.

“We need to get back.” Rick told them.

“Why?” Jason asked, looking around for any danger.

“I hid a gun here and it’s gone.” Rick told them, confiding in the two teens. “That means somebody knows. They know.”

Jason decided not to mention his own concealed gun which was a silent reminder to Carl to not mention it either. They simply nodded to Rick and followed him as he led them back towards the gates of Alexandria.

 

As Rick, Carl and Jason returned to the gates they heard shouting. They crossed the threshold into Alexandria to find Daryl pinning down Nicholas with his hands firmly wrapped around his neck. Glenn looked like he had just knocked Deanna’s son, Aiden to the floor. The three of them rushed towards the commotion before the whole thing could get any worse.

“That is enough!” Deanna bellowed at Daryl.

Rick reached Daryl and grabbed onto him. “Hey, hey, hey, we’re not doing this now.”

Aiden stood up and was about to make his way back towards Glenn but Michonne stood in the way, glaring into his eyes.

“You wanna end up on your ass again?” She threatened, causing him to back off.

Rick finally pulled Daryl off of Nicholas. The curly haired man stood up, holding his neck and coughing as he finally got air back into his lungs through his constricted windpipe. Rick had to continuously stand in Daryl’s way as he kept pacing back and forth like a dog, trying to find an opening to resume his attack.

“I want everyone to hear me, okay?” Deanna shouted just as Enid returned through the gates herself.

Jason stood close to Carl, one hand on his hunting knife and the other on the inside of his jacket in case he needed his gun.

“Rick and his people are part of this community now. In all ways.” Deanna continued. “As equals. Understood?”

Deanna glared at her son angrily.

Aiden shrugged. “Understood.”

“All of you turn in your weapons.” Deanna shouted before pointing at Aiden and Nicholas. “Then you two come talk to me.”

Rick and the others stayed where they were while the original Alexandria members all dispersed from the area. Deanna finally turned her attention to Rick.

“I told you I had a job for you. I’d like you to be our new constable.” She said. “That’s what you were. That’s what you are.”

Rick stared back at her in disbelief. Not only was she handing him authority in the community but she was allowing him to delve into his past self. All his memories of being a cop came back to him in a flash, especially those with Shane.

Deanna turned to Michonne. “And you too.”

The small woman then turned back to face Rick as the others looked on. “Will you accept?”

Rick took a moment before nodding, shifting on the spot. “Okay.”

Deanna turned back to Michonne who also nodded. “Yeah, I’m in.”

Daryl snorted and picked up his crossbow before walking off. He wasn’t looking for a job in a place he didn’t belong.

Deanna turned to Glenn. “Thank you.”

“For what?” Glenn asked in confusion, holding his anger from what had happened on the run at bay.

“For knocking him on his ass.” Deanna replied. Her son needed a wake up call.

As Glenn and the others started to go their separate ways, Carl turned his head to his right to look at Enid. The enigmatic girl stared right back at him with her big brown eyes.

“You don’t like me, do you?” Carl asked, feeling her gaze stab at him.

Enid didn’t answer. She simply walked away.

Jason watched Carl’s head fall in disappointment at the girl’s disinterest in him. He knew Carl loved him and that they were close. Despite the trusting bond they had built up over their time on the road, Jason couldn’t shake the protective feeling that was surging through him. He wanted to tell Enid that Carl was his. Not hers. His and his alone.

 

Later that night they were all hanging around the house. Most of the group were in the living room or some of the other rooms while Daryl remained outside in the cool night air. Jason and Carl sat at the dining table with Carl reading a comic and Jason writing in his diary.

“Don’t you think it’ll be a bit weird?” Carl asked him. “Being my teacher?”

Jason shrugged. “Shouldn’t be that bad. No one else knows.”

Carl smirked in amusement. “But I’ll be your favourite student.”

Jason smirked back. “I can be incredibly professional I’ll have you know.”

Carl giggled in amusement. He planned to tease Jason about his new job for quite a while to come.

“Looking forward to sharing a bed tonight?” Jason asked, keeping his voice low so the others wouldn’t hear.

Carl couldn’t help but blush and nod. He had wanted to experience that for so long and now he was going to get to have that experience.

The sound of footsteps coming down the stairs and through the hall interrupted their talk as Rick stepped into the room. They all turned to him as he revealed himself for the first time dressed in his constable uniform. Smart shoes, trousers, shirt and tie and a windbreaker jacket. Michonne, Jason and Carl all smiled. He looked good.

Rick made his way outside to talk to Daryl, closely followed behind by Carol.

“We good?” Rick asked the archer, referring to earlier.

“Yeah.” Daryl nodded. “You a cop again?”

Rick sighed and thought about his answer. He wouldn’t say the answer was yes but it wasn’t no either.

“I’m trying it on for size.” Rick finally answered.

“So we’re staying?” Carol asked.

Rick nodded. “I think we can start sleeping in our own homes, settle in.”

“We get comfortable here, we let our guard down, this place is gonna make us weak.” Carol commented cynically.

“Carl said that but I agree with Jason. It’s not gonna happen.” Rick answered confidently. “We won’t get weak, that’s not in us anymore. We’ll make it work.”

Rick stopped looking out at the street and turned back to Daryl and Carol in confidence.

“And if they can’t make it.” He told them. “Then we’ll just take this place.”

 

**It’s finally done. I think this is the second longest chapter of the fanfiction so far. This chapter was a lot of fun to write, with a lot of different things happening in it. Now that they are at Alexandria, I’ll be able to focus more on Carl and Jason and ignore several of the other characters.**

**Do not fear. It will not be smooth sailing in Alexandria for our ship. There’s going to be trouble inside the walls and outside. As a hint of things to come, has anyone guessed what is happening to Jason psychologically right now? I’m not sure how vague I’ve made it.**

**Anyway, as usual, let me know what you think of this chapter and what you’d like to see in the upcoming chapters. So please do leave a review/comment. They fuel my writing.**

**Thanks for all the follows/subscriptions/votes/favourites/kudos etc.**

**Thanks to the reviewers of chapter 17: rk0192, MagnificentFern, The Sorrowful Deity, Darkscribe81, Sarah_94, xONEWorldx, The_Man_Called_Madara, TheBlueWinterSelection, Chancey, AmbroseViolence and that one guest.**

**See you all next chapter!**

 


	19. Exceptionally Normal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the group get settled in Alexandria, Deanna throws them a welcoming party. The party ends up having unexpected consequences for Jason.

_“I’ve got a couple more things for you.” Kellin whispered in Jason’s ear._

_The two lovers stood in the living room with Kellin behind Jason, his arms wrapped around Jason’s waist. It was Jason’s birthday and they had recently got back from seeing Jason’s favourite band, Shinedown, perform live in concert. When they had returned home, Kellin had insisted on making dinner for them as it had turned out to be Jason’s favourite meal. They had watched a DVD while having dinner together and now that it was late, they both stood in the middle of the living room after having turned off the television._

_“And what would those be?” Jason asked, turning his head to give his lover a quick peck on the lips._

_Kellin grinned before removing his arms from around Jason and heading over to the nearby shelf. On it sat an IPod docking station complete which Kellin turned on before scrolling through the list of songs on the small device. Jason watched him with curiosity before he finally settled on a song and hit play. Kellin turned around and grinned at Jason before offering out his hand to him as the song started._

_“I could stay awake just to hear you breathing_  
_Watch you smile while you are sleeping_  
 _While you're far away and dreaming.”_

_Jason couldn’t help but smile back as he took Kellin’s hand in his own while placing his other on Kellin’s hip. Kellin placed his free hand on Jason’s shoulder and took the lead in their dance around the room. Kellin loved to dance and it was something he had grown up doing but this was different. This was for Jason._

_“I could spend my life in this sweet surrender_  
_I could stay lost in this moment forever_  
 _Every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure.”_

_Jason smiled as they danced, looking into Kellin’s eyes to see a matching gaze of love. They had been through so much together but they were still together. He couldn’t help but shake his head in amusement as he reflected on when they first met. Jason had been stunned by Kellin’s looks and up-beat, playful personality when they had first met yet he never would have expected to actually be with him. It had been a dream come true._

_“Don't wanna close my eyes_  
 _I don't wanna fall asleep_  
 _'Cause I'd miss you, baby_  
 _And I don't wanna miss a thing._  
  
_'Cause even when I dream of you_  
 _The sweetest dream would never do_  
 _I'd still miss you, baby_  
 _And I don't wanna miss a thing.”_

_Kellin could tell what Jason was thinking about. He too reflected on the feelings of that day often. He remembered nervously approaching this handsome, slightly older guy with a do or die attitude. Kellin had expected to be knocked back or shot down for being too forward, too young or just simply for being gay. None of those things happened. He had somehow managed to capture Jason’s attention completely._

_“Lying close to you feeling your heart beating_  
_And I'm wondering what you're dreaming,_  
 _Wondering if it's me you're seeing.”_

_The relationship hadn’t been instant. Jason’s feelings for Kellin certainly grew quickly to the point where he had to force them down and hide them. He didn’t want to lose such a marvellous person from his life. When he had learned of the problems that plagued Kellin’s life he couldn’t help but get involved. He had to help this new friend. Jason didn’t do it in the hopes of a relationship, he did it out of how much he cared. His friends used to joke that Jason was like the superhero of their group, always rushing to save people._

_“Then I kiss your eyes and thank God we're together_  
_And I just wanna stay with you_  
 _In this moment forever, forever and ever.”_

_For Kellin, Jason had been the first person outside of his immediate family circle to learn of his problems. He had been the first one to notice the scars on his arms and detect the deep unhappiness that he lived with. It took Kellin a long time to understand why he felt so different around Jason. Something about his presence, his energy, just seemed to brighten things up for him. He had never expected how actively involved Jason had chosen to get in order to solve most of the problems. He had quickly become Kellin’s hero._

_“I don't wanna close my eyes_  
 _I don't wanna fall asleep_  
 _'Cause I'd miss you, baby_  
 _And I don't wanna miss a thing._  
  
_'Cause even when I dream of you_  
 _The sweetest dream would never do_  
 _I'd still miss you, baby_  
 _And I don't wanna miss a thing.”_

_Jason had initially been surprised when Kellin had started openly flirting with him. He couldn’t deny it was what he had wanted so he quickly went along with it. He had never seen himself as being particularly charming but apparently he had been as Kellin’s interest in him had shot through the roof. There was a clear shared interest but there were also concerns because of those around them. In the end, not much thinking had been required._

_“I don't wanna miss one smile_  
_I don't wanna miss one kiss_  
_Well, I just wanna be with you_  
 _Right here with you, just like this.”_

_If there was one thing Kellin wished he could have changed in their relationship it would have been the start of it. He had been cheated on by his previous boyfriend which had left him frustrated, lonely and feeling unwanted. As things had escalated with Jason he became desperate for contact. Their first sexual relations were rushed, desperate and based more on lust and sexual frustration rather than love. He wished that could be changed._

_“I just wanna hold you close_  
_I feel your heart so close to mine_  
 _And just stay here in this moment_  
 _For all the rest of time, yeah, yeah, yeah!”_

_Jason also wished they could have been more loving in their first intimate encounters. He kept in mind that they had been younger then, still very much hormonal teenagers and a lot of what happened was a result of that. Although he wished it could be changed to be more about love and less about lust, he fondly remembered it and wouldn’t truly change it even if he had the power to. It was an odd contradiction in his mind and heart but that fact oddly didn’t bother him._

_“Don't wanna close my eyes_  
_Don't wanna fall asleep_  
 _'Cause I'd miss you, baby_  
 _And I don't wanna miss a thing._  
  
_'Cause even when I dream of you_  
 _The sweetest dream would never do_  
 _I'd still miss you, baby_  
 _And I don't wanna miss a thing.”_

_The two lovers continued to dance around the room, their bodies as close together as possible with their foreheads together. Every so often they would trade brief, gentle kisses as they moved around the room. Nothing else existed outside of that room. All that mattered to them was each other. They were happy together, the happiest either of them had ever been in their lives and probably the happiest they would ever be._

_“I don't wanna close my eyes_  
_I don't wanna fall asleep_  
 _'Cause I'd miss you, baby_  
 _And I don't wanna miss a thing._  
  
_'Cause even when I dream of you_  
 _The sweetest dream would never do_  
 _and I'd still miss you, baby_  
 _And I don't wanna miss a thing.”_

_Kellin smiled as he leaned in closer to Jason, capturing his lips in a loving kiss before breaking apart and resting his head on Jason’s shoulder. He placed small, gentle kisses on Jason’s neck and jaw, leading up to his ear._

_“When this song ends I’m going to make love to you.” Kellin told him. “That’s the final thing I had planned for your birthday.”_

_Jason swallowed thickly as his heart swelled. Kellin had planned out the day to every little detail, it was loving dedication that wasn’t necessary. Jason would have been content with a day lazing about on the sofa but Kellin was obviously having none of that. There had been breakfast in bed, presents, the Shinedown concert, his favourite dinner, this dance and now it was going to all end with love making before they slept. Jason didn’t know what he had done to deserve someone so wonderful but he wasn’t going to question it._

_“Don't wanna close my eyes_  
_I don't wanna fall asleep, yeah_  
 _I don't wanna miss a thing_  
 _I don't wanna miss a thing.”_

_As the song came to a close, Kellin captured Jason’s lips with his own yet again. His tongue slid in effortlessly thanks to experience as he pulled Jason close against him. The music faded gradually as the kiss became more intense. Jason knew that there was only one thing on Kellin’s mind, making love. It would be the first time they had swapped positions and Jason was understandably nervous. His excitement and trust in Kellin greatly outweighed that nervousness. He showed that he was ready by returning the kiss with as much force as he was receiving it._

_Jason hadn’t been consciously aware of it, as far as he was concerned they had been standing still during their loving lip lock but somehow Kellin had guided them to the bedroom. He became aware of it when he was gently dropped down onto his bed with Kellin looking down at him lovingly. It was going to be a night to remember._

Jason slowly woke and blinked the sand out of his eyes. He was lying in a spacious, soft and comfortable bed with his arms wrapped around someone’s smaller form. His tired mind struggled to remind him where he was or how he got there. He wasn’t used to being in a bed. It felt like he was in the world before the apocalypse. Jason’s mind flared up as all the recent memories flooded back to him, walkers, the storm, the barn, Aaron, Alexandria, and Deanna, the shower with Carl, becoming a teacher and sleeping in their own bed for the first time.

Jason smiled as he tightened his hold on Carl’s slightly smaller form and pulled himself closer against the younger teen. He rested his face between Carl’s shoulder and head, allowing him to check if Carl was awake or not. The fluttering of eyelashes told him that Carl was just waking up. Jason kissed his cheek.

“How’d you sleep?” He asked gently into Carl’s ear.

Carl smiled, turning his head round in an attempt to face him. “Best I’ve ever slept.”

Jason grinned, letting Carl turn round onto his other side so they could face each other. “Why’s that?”

“Because this bed is really comfy and you were beside me.” Carl told him, his fingers tracing along Jason’s bicep.

Jason kissed Carl’s forehead. “Same here and for the same reasons.”

They fell silent for a few minutes. The two lovers simply lay in the bed, their naked torsos pressed together as they gently caressed one another while sharing glances and smiles. They were in their own bed, in their own room, in their own house, all thanks to the people of Alexandria. They didn’t have to worry about walkers or rush to get ready. They lay in bed together simply because they could.

“Even in the mornings you look stunning.” Jason complimented with a soft smile.

Carl blushed and let out an awkward chuckle. “I’m not.”

Jason moved his head forward and closed the gap between them to capture Carl’s lips with his own. His tongue found its way inside Carl’s mouth as they shared the sweet and gentle kiss. It was a relaxed kiss despite being full of love.

They slowly broke apart with Jason gazing into Carl’s eyes. “You are.”

Carl smiled, eyes beaming with affection before he closed them to let out a long yawn. He was still tired despite how well he had slept. The orange colour in the sky told him that it was still early.

“Go back to sleep, you deserve a long lie.” Jason told him, ending it with another soft kiss.

Jason sat up as he prepared to get out of bed, prompting Carl’s arm to shoot up and grab hold of him.

“Where are you going?” Carl asked. Classes weren’t until the afternoon and the sun was just coming up.

Jason smiled, placing a hand over Carl’s. “I’m going to go for a morning run, you know, as exercise.”

Carl released him and snaked his arm back under the covers. The bed felt very big and empty without Jason’s body pressed against him. Jason stood up and made his way over to the drawers, pulling out a simple t-shirt and joggers to wear for his run. He could feel Carl’s eyes on him as he got dressed.

“I won’t be long, I promise.” Jason told him before leaving the room, closing the bedroom door behind him.

Carl sighed as he rested his head back on the pillow and closed his eyes. He didn’t want to stay in bed without Jason next to him but with any luck Jason wouldn’t take long.

 

Rick, Carol and Daryl all stood over the two dead walkers on the ground. They had come out to the shed where Rick had hidden his gun so they could have a meeting. They had managed to kill two walkers but they could hear the rasps of a third one nearby.

“I don’t see it, but it’s close.” Daryl told them. “There’s just one of them.”

 “We won’t be here long.” Rick told him. “So, what do you think?”

“Go in when it’s empty.” Carol answered, referring to the armoury.

“Well, how’s that?” Rick questioned. “It’s locked up at night.”

“The window, there’s just a latch, I can leave it open.” Carol explained.

“A latch?” Rick repeated, surprised that the security would be so low.

“Yeah.” Carol confirmed.

“What if one of those pricks shuts it?” Daryl questioned.

“We wait a couple of days then leave it open again.” Carol replied calmly.

A snarl echoed nearby.

“It’s getting closer.” Daryl told them, looking around for it.

“We need to do it sooner than later.” Rick told them both. “Right now they’re not watching us, not worrying about meetings like this. We may need the guns, we may not.”

“We will, whatever way it goes.” Carol answered sternly.

“They’re the luckiest damn people I’ve ever met.” Rick commented about the people of Alexandria. “And they just keep getting luckier.”

“How’s that?” Daryl asked, a little confused as to how they could get any luckier.

“We’re here now.” Rick answered.

“They’ve got a couple of footlockers full of nine millimetre autos, just tossed in there.” Carol told them, remembering some details. “They’re never gonna use them so they’re never gonna know they’re gone.”

“Someone’s got one now, right?” Daryl commented, gesturing to the blender.

“Listen, the others, we want them to try.” Rick told them after thinking for a moment.

“You too.” Carol said to Daryl.

“So we keep it quiet, just us.” Rick finished as a snarl sounded close by. “Here it comes.”

The walker came round from the back of the shed, snarling and swaying its arms on its approach.

“I got him.” Daryl stated, walking towards it.

“Hey, wait.” Carol stopped him, following him.

Carol raised her silenced Heckler & Koch P2000 and fired at the walker. Rick and Daryl watched in confusion as she shot it six times in the body before finally shooting it in the forehead. They stared at her as she lowered her gun and turned back to them.

“You said you were taking me out shooting.” Carol told them. “I couldn’t go back with a full mag.”

“Lucky he came by.” Daryl commented, referring to the walker.

“We should get back.” Rick stated as they started walking. “You’ll pull the latch, we’ll pick our moment. Us? We don’t need to be lucky.”

Daryl stopped as they walked past the corpse of the walker that Carol had just killed. He had noticed what looked to be the letter W carved into its forehead.

“The hell is that?” He wondered aloud, bending over to take a closer look. “Is that a W?”

“Yeah.” Carol confirmed, looking at it herself.

Rick looked at the walker’s forehead before looking at Daryl and Carol. He didn’t want to say anything right away but he remembered seeing walkers with the same mark at Noah’s community. His community had been attacked by a group of people who liked to chop up walker bodies and carve W on their foreheads. This fresh walker being so close to Alexandria meant that the group that attacked Noah’s community couldn’t be far either. They would need to make Alexandria much safer and soon.

 

Jason ran along the perimeter of Alexandria, keeping to the wall as much as possible. It was his third lap and the exertion of the exercise was beginning to take effect. His breathing was getting heavy, his legs were starting to burn and his abdominal muscles ached from the constant running. Sweat trickled down his head due to the activity and morning heat. His loose t-shirt was starting to cling to his body as it became damp.

Despite all of these physical strains that his body was experiencing he continued to run. His mind was focused on other things to the point he wasn’t registering his physical condition. This community appeared to be their home for the time being. If that were true then it would need work, it would need changing because the people were still far too soft and naïve. It was like being in the world before the apocalypse and as far as Jason was concerned, that was still the world many people were still living in.

Though he complained about the complacency in Alexandria, he couldn’t deny that he did like it there. It was a place of relative safety and normality and that was what they needed most. Jason was sick of being out on the road, be it alone or in a group, he needed the opportunity to eat and sleep without being paranoid about walkers or other people. Alexandria was an oasis in the desert and it had turned out to be real.

Jason wasn’t sure how he felt about becoming the teacher for the older students. He wasn’t much older than them but his hardened, mature nature made the age gap seem all the more great. He would try his best to emulate his favourite teachers from his own education. He shuddered from exertion and the realisation that all those teachers were probably dead, though he liked to entertain himself with the notion that some of the more badass teachers were still around.

One thing that would need to change is what they were taught. He knew that the young people in Alexandria were taught regular topics like any other school before the world ended. That was worthwhile for the young children but for the teenagers it was a waste of time. Jason knew that in order to survive their education would need to be survival orientated. The use of firearms, the reading of maps, tracking, hunting, killing walkers, distilling water and all the other skills that were needed to survive. If the walls ever fell, the teenagers should all be able to protect themselves and their families.

It was a foregone conclusion that by taking this course of action as teacher that he was going to receive complaints. Many parents who were still living the warm, cosy and safe life behind those walls would take umbrage at Jason turning their older children into survivalists. If anything did happen, he knew they would thank him in the long run so he would just have to grit his teeth and bare the initial backlash.

The greatest thing about Alexandria as far as Jason was concerned was being able to spend so much time with Carl. It wasn’t like before when they were on the road because it was now their own personal time. They had their own room and their own bed. They slept in each other’s arms and he couldn’t forget their first ever shower together. Jason felt his face heat up just at the memory of it. He knew how lucky he was to have found Carl after losing Kellin and for Rick to be so accepting of their relationship. It was rare and he saw it as a gift.

The relationship would inevitably cause problems within the walls of Alexandria because some people would always be intolerant. Jason knew this and had promised himself that anyone who dared to come between him and Carl would regret it. He didn’t care how many people he had to kill for him and Carl to be happy. Bigots who spit in the face of love had no business being around anymore anyway.

One thing that was a mystery to Jason was Carl’s interest in Enid. He hoped his younger lover was simply looking for a friend who probably had similar traumatic experiences and he hoped that Enid would only allow for that. Jason was not about to let some pretty-faced pseudo-mysterious bitch get in the way of his relationship with Carl. She may be younger than him but if it came to it, Jason would kill her too if she didn’t take no for an answer.

A bark brought him out of his thoughts as he returned his attention to where he was running. Ahead of him, Brodie, the chocolate Labrador, was bounding towards him. The dog’s ears were flapping as he bounced along, practically flying a foot above the ground. Behind him, Trisha stood with her hands on her hips knowing it was pointless to stop the big pup. Jason stopped his running and knelt down to greet Brodie who started licking his face and rubbing his head into his chest as Jason petted him.

“I’ve never known him to take to someone so quickly.” Trisha commented as she finally reached the pair.

Jason smiled up at her as he rubbed Brodie’s belly. “I used to work with animals. People always said I had an affinity with them.”

“I can see that.” Trisha remarked with a laugh. “You’ve got a friend for life there.”

“Here’s hoping.” Jason commented cynically as he played with Brodie.

“How you feeling about your first day as a teacher?” Trisha asked him seriously.

Jason shrugged. “Nothing really phases me anymore.”

“They’re all good kids.” Trisha told him. “But they can get a little carried away sometimes.”

“I’ll make sure discipline isn’t in short supply.” Jason assured her. “I had some amazing teachers when I was studying, so I’ll try to do as they did.”

“That’s the spirit.” Trisha told him. “As you know, I’m never far away if you need me in the classes or for anything else.”

Jason nodded. “Thanks.”

Trisha slapped her legs a couple times, leaning over and stared at Brodie. “Come on boy, time to go!”

Brodie gave her a look of disappointment. The dog would have preferred to play on the grass with Jason all day. With one last bark of amusement, Brodie got back on his feet and obediently followed Trisha back to her house.

 

Michonne stood in front of the mirror in her room, studying herself after having put the constable uniform on for the first time. She felt strange wearing such an authoritative uniform. She had been a lawyer before the apocalypse and a wandering samurai after it. Police officer wasn’t exactly what she was but it gave her a place in the community so she would go along with it.

With a sigh she used her katana to cut away a very long loose thread. She studied the sword and thought about wearing it. Would she need her sword on her back as a constable? Michonne figured she probably wouldn’t but after so long of having the sword on her back it felt wrong to not have it. Her eyes met with Rick’s as he appeared in the doorway.

“I don’t know if this is some kind of play.” Rick commented in open thought. “Handing authority over to strangers.”

“The authority to break up fist fights.” Michonne countered. They hardly had power.

“Well, if it was just that then she should’ve given one of these to Daryl.” Rick retorted, pointing at the windbreakers.

Michonne smiled and shook her head. “I don’t know if it’s for us or for them or maybe Deanna’s trying to get rid of us and them.”

Rick didn’t answer, considering the point she was making. It would make some sense.

“You put these jackets on me and you, have the people see it.” Michonne continued. “If that’s the play then that’d be smart and she seems smart.”

“Smart for then or smart for now?” Rick questioned cynically.

“This is now.” Michonne pressed. They were at the community, they were living regular lives again. They had to adapt to that if they wanted to live there.

 

Jason closed the front door behind him and leaned against it as he panted to get his breath back. Several laps of Alexandria’s perimeter had turned out to be a decent workout and it hadn’t taken him that long to complete either. He was determined to stay in shape and not get lazy in the safety of the community.

He made his way into the house and up the stairs. The house appeared to be empty though he knew that Carl would still be around. When he closed in on their bedroom he could hear the racket of the pipelines telling him that someone was using the shower. Jason smirked to himself knowing that it would be Carl. He closed and locked the bedroom door behind him before he quickly pulled off his running clothes, dumping them on a chair in the corner of the room.

Jason made his way to the bathroom door and carefully tested it. Just as he had assumed, Carl had left it unlocked. He opened it and slid into the bathroom before silently closing and locking it behind him. The room was thick with steam, reducing visibility. Despite that, Jason could make out Carl’s naked form through the glass of the shower door. The younger teen had his back to Jason and wasn’t aware that he was no longer alone.

Jason slid off his boxers before quietly making his way over to the shower. He slid the door open, surprised that Carl couldn’t hear it over the sound of the water. He slid the door shut and smirked when Carl jumped in response to his arms wrapping round him. They stood under the spray of the shower with Jason closing his eyes at the pleasant sensation of the warm water covering his body.

He kissed Carl’s neck before whispering in his ear. “Hey.”

Carl twisted his head round to look at him before smiling. “Hey.”

Jason quickly got to washing his hair as the two of them showered in silence. When Carl started washing his own body with the scrunchie Jason stopped him. With a quick kiss to the neck Jason took the scrunchie and started washing Carl himself. He rubbed the scrunchie slowly over the entirety of Carl’s slim form, making sure to not miss a single bit of it. It was also a way for Jason to admire his younger lover’s body.

Carl closed his eyes and tilted his head back, resting it against Jason’s collar as he let Jason wash him. There was something strangely pleasurable about letting Jason gently run the scrunchie over his body, taking his time and painting his neck with soft kisses. Carl let out a gentle gasp as Jason ran the scrunchie over his lower regions and leaned into the older teen as he felt himself harden under the touch. Jason smiled in adoration as he observed the reaction the simple action provoked from Carl.

“Please.” Carl quietly gasped out as he bucked his hips towards Jason’s lingering hand.

Jason smiled and kissed Carl’s neck gently as he wrapped his hand around Carl’s hard member. He dropped the scrunchie to the shower floor and wrapped his left arm around Carl’s waist, pulling the smaller teen close against him as his right hand went to work. Jason loved the feeling of having Carl in his hand, hard and hot yet soft and smooth. The little twitches from Carl’s body as pleasure shot through it accompanied by gentle moans were the icing on the cake for Jason. He loved being able to do this to Carl.

Jason usually wasn’t the type to crave sex constantly and he knew that he had to be especially patient with Carl. However, he wasn’t touching Carl out of lust but out of love. The younger teen had seen so much death and destruction, his mind was filled with horrific sights and painful memories. Jason wanted to replace them with wonderful sights and loving memories. Instead of people being torn apart, he wanted Carl to see the sunrise and sunset. He wanted Carl to observe nature and appreciate the natural beauty of the Earth. Instead of painful memories of loss and fear, he wanted Carl to have memories filled with love and pleasure.

Jason increased the pace of his strokes and continued to pepper Carl’s neck with kisses. He was too proud to admit it, but he needed the intimacy just as much as Carl did. It had been so long since he had felt anything warm and loving. Jason had been a cold, empty shell of a person after Kellin’s death and it was something he knew he’d never get over. Despite that, meeting Carl had allowed his old self to return and had allowed him to feel again. Carl gave him plenty to smile about and that was the most important thing in life with the world the way it was.

Carl’s moans were getting louder, his breath coming out in rapid pants as his body shook with pleasure. He was getting closer and closer to release and Jason knew it. Carl’s hands were holding onto Jason’s arm, which was wrapped round his waist, as he squeezed his eyes shut from the pleasure. Jason continued to stroke him faster, as if knowing just how close he was.

“I love you.” Jason whispered in Carl’s ear before kissing his neck again.

Just like back at the church, those three words had some sort of special effect on Carl. He gasped out Jason’s name and bucked his hips before spilling into Jason’s hand which continued to stroke him through his orgasm. Carl breathed heavily as he came down from his sexual high while Jason let the spray of the shower wash away the mess.

Carl turned to Jason and wrapped both his arms around the taller teen’s body so he could pull him in for a loving kiss. When they broke apart, Carl’s hand drifted down to Jason’s own hard member and pumped it slowly.

“Your turn.” Carl told him with a grin as his hand got to work.

 

“You protect and serve. You patrol, walk the wall, watch out for the kids.” Deanna told Rick and Michonne. “If there’s a conflict, you solve it. And people will listen to you.”

“Because we’re wearing windbreakers?” Michonne questioned.

“Because they believe in this.” Deanna answered. “Because I’m telling them to.”

Deanna stood over the dining table that Michonne and Maggie were sat at. Rick stood in the doorway silently listening. She had called them all to her house for a meeting so she could explain their jobs and the purpose of Alexandria.

“A police officer used to live here, so we had these jackets and I wanted to make it official.” Deanna explained. “So it’s official. There’s gonna be a government here one day, that’s why I want Maggie working here with me.”

Maggie and Deanna shared a smile.

“There’s gonna be a police force that’s why I want you two to start it.” Deanna continued. “I see a vibrant community here with industry, commerce, civilization. Real lives, it might be horses and mills but…”

Rick had taken his attention off her to stare out the window. Being perfectly aware of how dangerous and damaged the world outside the perimeter walls was, he felt that Deanna was daydreaming. She was speaking of a fantasy that had no real basis in reality. There weren’t many people left and those who were still alive were usually dangerous.

“What?” Deanna questioned, noticing him looking away. “Does it sound like pie in the sky?”

“No.” Maggie replied, earning a nod from Deanna.

“No.” Michonne answered, earning a smile from Deanna.

Deanna looked up at Rick as they stared at one another. Rick knew fine well that it was, as she put it, pie in the sky and yet he couldn’t bring himself to say it to her face. A community was better than desolation and her ridiculous fantasies wouldn’t matter once they had taken the place over.

“No.” Rick responded. “Can we talk security?”

 

Jason and Carl lay back on the sofa with Carl lying on top of Jason. Jason’s hands gently traced Carl’s chest and stomach through his shirt as they relaxed in each other’s company. They were alone in the house for the time being as neither of them had anything to do until the afternoon.

“First day of class today.” Jason commented, resting his face against Carl’s head. “Looking forward to it?”

Carl shrugged. “I guess.”

“You guess?” Jason questioned. “What’s up?”

Carl sighed, embarrassment creeping through him. “I haven’t been to school since before…”

“And you don’t want to look stupid?” Jason suggested.

Carl didn’t verbally answer, he simply nodded his head. He was annoyed at himself for even caring about something like that. After everything he had been through school should be easy yet he couldn’t help but be nervous.

“You won’t look stupid.” Jason told him. “I’m the teacher, remember?”

“Yeah but they’ll know stuff that I don’t.” Carl argued, his inner frustration revealing itself in his voice.

Jason let out a light laugh. “School is all about learning. Besides, you know stuff that they don’t.”

“Like what?” Carl asked, not sure what Jason was talking about.

“Like how to survive.” Jason answered. “Class with me isn’t going to be what you expect, I promise.”

“How?” Carl questioned, his curiosity peaking at what plans Jason had hidden away.

Jason ran his fingers through Carl’s hair. “You’ll just have to wait and see.”

“Aren’t you nervous?” Carl asked, being a teacher was an important responsibility.

Jason shrugged. “After dealing with wild animals, walkers and your dad…”

Carl couldn’t help but laugh at Jason including Rick in his list of things that make him nervous.

“I think a small group of teenagers won’t bother me much.” Jason finished. “Even if one of them is my boyfriend.”

Carl turned to him as he finished and stared at him. They had both reached an understanding so Jason knew exactly what that look meant. He leaned forward and captured Carl’s lips with his own.

 

Rick, Michonne, Maggie and Deanna walked along the perimeter wall by the large solar panels that supplied power to the community.

“We need to set up patrols along the walls and not just looking for damage.” Rick explained. “But signs that anyone climbed in from outside. You can move or ride up the supports, that’s what I’d do. People are the real threat now.”

“Rick, I know you think we should all be armed within the walls but I can’t do that.” Deanna argued. She wasn’t prepared to turn a vibrant community into an armed camp.

“That’s fine.” Rick commented. “You make these changes, we won’t need to.”

“Excuse me.” Sasha’s voice sounded.

They all turned as the young black woman approached them, she looked somewhat lost.

“I wanna volunteer to be one of the lookouts in the clock tower.” She told Deanna.

“There are no lookouts in the clock tower.” Deanna replied with a shake of her head.

“What?” Rick hissed, shocked that they had no spotters whatsoever.

“We saw someone up there earlier.” Michonne commented, equally shocked.

“It’s an empty rifle that my son, Spencer, put up there.” Deanna explained sheepishly. “He mans it sometimes but not often.”

Rick placed his hands on his hips and paced on the spot. He couldn’t believe that these people had been making so many naïve, stupid mistakes and yet they continued to survive unharmed. They truly were the luckiest group of people he had ever met.

“Look, there hasn’t been the need.” Deanna argued her case. She had already mentioned that the surrounding area had been evacuated when the crisis began.

“We need a lookout in that tower right now, twenty-four seven.” Rick demanded sternly.

“It’s the only way we’ll be able to see if someone’s coming at us.” Michonne explained. It was extremely important.

“Okay, we’ll make shifts.” Deanna agreed reluctantly.

“I’ll take the shifts, as many as possible.” Sasha declared confidently.

Deanna stared at her, narrowing her eyes in suspicion. “Why?”

“Sasha’s one of our best shots.” Maggie reasoned. “She can do it.”

“I’m gonna put Spencer up there today.” Deanna told them. “I’ll consider you being our primary lookout but I need something in return.”

They all narrowed their eyes with suspicion and curiosity. It was the first time Deanna had suggested them owing her anything.

“Tonight, I’m hosting a welcome for all of you in my home.” Deanna explained. “I want you to be there.”

Sasha had absolutely no interest in a party. “Why?”

“Come tonight.” Deanna replied with a nod. “Then we’ll talk about it.”

 

After they all agreed to go to the party the group dispersed. Deanna and Maggie returned to Deanna’s home to continue planning things for the community, Michonne continued her patrol of the community and Sasha wandered off to do her own thing. Rick decided to head back to his own house to see how Carl and Jason were doing and to inform them of the welcoming party that night.

As he walked down the street, Carol shot out from the porch of one of the houses to walk alongside him.

“Have you heard about the party?” She asked him.

“Everyone’s gonna be there.” Rick commented.

“That’s right.” Carol replied.

“So tonight then.” Rick stated seriously. It was the perfect opportunity to enact their plan.

“Should be able to slip out.” Carol commented.

“The armoury is right next to Deanna’s.” Rick told her. “I’ll back you up.”

“People might wonder where their new constable is, or Carl’s dad.” Carol thought aloud, grinning so no one would suspect their conversation was serious.

“Okay.” Rick answered, accepting her point. “Well we can’t use Daryl, they’re watching every move he makes.”

“It’s fine. You know what’s great about this place?” Carol asked, still grinning stupidly. “I get to be invisible again.”

Rick smiled back. Just like back at Terminus, Carol was going to be their secret weapon.

 

Jason and Carl were still laying back on the couch when the front door swung open. Carl’s initial instinct was to move off Jason but the older teen held him in place. There was no need to hide their affection for one another, especially when they were so comfortable. The front door closed and the distinct sound of Rick’s boots thudding on the floor as he walked reached their ears. Rick turned from the hallway and entered the living room, his eyes falling upon the relaxed couple.

“Comfy?” Rick asked with a smile.

Jason and Carl both grinned in amusement.

“Very.” Jason replied.

“Thought you had class?” Rick asked them, sitting down on the opposite couch.

They both nodded with Jason answering again. “In half an hour.”

Rick nodded, at least they weren’t skipping out. “Deanna’s hosting a party tonight at her place.”

“Why?” Carl asked, turning his head to face his dad.

“To welcome us.” Rick explained. “So make sure you’re washed and smartly dressed.”

“I never thought being smartly dressed would ever matter anymore.” Jason commented, staring at the ceiling.

“Me neither.” Rick replied, his eyes falling to the floor for a moment in thought.

Rick eventually stood up and made his way back to the door. He had to continue his patrol despite how much nicer it would be to lay back like Jason and Carl were doing. Preferably he’d like to take the community over so he’d feel safer but he would need to be patient.

Once Rick had left, clearly deep in thought as he hadn’t even said goodbye to them, Carl finally got off Jason. They both stood up and stretched, although they were curious to what the class would be like, neither of them really wanted to do anything other than be with each other.

Jason held Carl’s hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. “We should probably get going.”

Carl nodded, though his gaze remained on the floor.

Noticing this, Jason squeezed his hand again. “Hey, it’s gonna be fine. I promise.”

Carl looked up at him, as if needing to see the promise in Jason’s eyes in order to trust it. Jason took the opportunity to close the gap between them and kiss Carl gently. It was the most reassuring action he could think of.

 

A few minutes later and they had arrived at the garage behind Trisha’s house. There were just over a dozen study chairs arranged in four rows of four. Most of the class had already arrived, with Mikey and Ron instantly spotted by Carl. Sitting beside Ron was Enid who had chosen to come to class that day.

“Carl, Jason, so glad you could make it.” Trisha greeted with a smile.

Carl felt his legs get weak. It was finally here, his first day of school since the apocalypse began. Only eleven of the seats were filled leaving him unsure of how many boys and girls his age there actually were in Alexandria. His only relief was knowing that Ron, Mikey and Enid were there and that Jason would be taking the class.

“Carl, feel free to sit anywhere you like.” Trisha told him. “You’re our twelfth and final student for now.”

Jason and Carl shared a nod before the younger teen made his way over to sit with next to Ron. The whole class seemed to be fixated on Jason as they could tell he was older than any of them. They weren’t sure if he was a new student or something else. Their eyes followed him as Trisha led him to the front of the class.

“Okay everyone, I’d like to introduce you all to your new teacher.” Trisha explained to them, earning shocked looks from some of the students. “He’ll be taking over from me for the foreseeable future.”

Carl’s eyes scanned the reactions of his classmates. Many of them were gobsmacked to learn that a young newcomer was being trusted with their education. Carl had a different problem. It was going to be awkward to spend a couple hours a day staring at his boyfriend without being able to do anything. He had to be a student because Jason was the teacher.

Carl was brought out of his thoughts when whispered comments managed to float to his ears. A couple girls around his age who sat together were already talking about Jason. He was surprised that they were judging him before they knew the first thing about him. The comments took a sudden turn as they began complimenting Jason’s looks. Carl felt an odd sensation shoot through him, it was an emotion he was largely unfamiliar with. All he knew was that he wanted to silence them. He placed his hands on his knees and squeezed to try and relieve some of the building anger.

Jason cleared his throat to silence the class before speaking. “Hello everyone. I’m Jason Clarke and I hope to keep our classes fun and interesting.”

Jason’s eyes met with Carl’s and he froze momentarily. He could see the conflicted emotions shooting through his younger lover. Desire was clearly one of them but his posture indicated that he was agitated. Jason’s eyes scanned over the class and noticed how a couple of the students were looking at him and whispering to one another. He must have been making a positive first impression and Carl obviously wasn’t amused.

“I keep the class agenda here.” Trisha broke him from his thoughts, standing over a book. “Everything is noted down in it. Topics taught, behaviour, everything. Good way to stay organised.”

Jason nodded as he looked at the book. He glanced at the open page and studied it quickly. Attendance was noted, topics were noted down along with the dates and textbook page numbers. They had most recently been looking at the American Civil War and before that it had been Geometry. Jason felt a little light headed looking at the book, memories of his own education firing through his mind. He shook his head and collected his thoughts.

“Obviously if you need anything, let me know.” Trisha finished. “But for now, I’ll leave you to it.”

Jason nodded and watched as Trisha entered her house through the garage door before closing it behind her. Jason turned to the class and scanned the faces of the various students who were there, all of them transfixed on him. They were waiting for him to begin. He took a breath before he started.

“Okay, so like I said earlier, my name is Jason Clarke.” Jason explained. “I’d prefer it if you didn’t call me Mr. Clarke because that makes me sound old.”

“So, what do we call you?” One of the boys in the class asked.

Jason shrugged. “Jason will be fine. Or if you insist on being formal, then call me sir.”

Carl bit his lip. Calling his boyfriend “sir” would feel very strange. He’d stick to first name terms so nothing felt awkward between them.

“Now then, I think it’s only fair that we lay down some ground rules for the classes. That way we can all get on well.” Jason told them, pacing back and forth. “I intend to keep things informal, I’d rather we all act like friends. However, if you disrespect me during class then I’ll become your worst nightmare.”

A couple students nodded in agreement, while others appeared to be slightly intimidated.

“We work together, we respect each other and we keep the atmosphere positive.” Jason continued. “If we do that, there’ll be plenty of time for laughs. Anyone who chooses to be disruptive will answer to me, Trisha or Deanna.”

Jason had a feeling it would never come to anything like that but in emulation of his favourite teacher, he knew it was best to lay down the rules. Understanding and trust were key to a good teaching environment, especially if it had a positive and friendly atmosphere.

“The most important thing is honesty. I’ll be honest with all of you so I expect the same in return.” Jason continued. “This isn’t just about learning but also about becoming good people. That’s what the world needs now more than ever.”

His eyes scanned the silent class. They were well behaved enough to remain silent while he spoke so that was a good start. He couldn’t help but smile when his eyes met Carl’s. Carl looked rather impressed so far and didn’t seem to be as nervous.

“Now that I’ve laid all my cards on the table.” Jason changed subject, wandering over to the agenda. “Who here is sick of studying the Civil war?”

There were hesitant looks in the class, most of them were suspicious of the motivation behind the question. They were wondering if he was trying to weed out the good students from the bad. Jason could detect their hesitation and sighed, placing his hands on his hips.

“What did I say about honesty?” He asked them. “I hated history at school, so come on, be honest.”

Gradually, several hands went up and before long almost all the class had their hands up. All of them except for Carl who didn’t know anything about the American Civil war and therefore didn’t have an opinion about studying it yet. However, if the rest of the class hated it he figured it wasn’t something worth knowing about.

“Then you’ll be glad to know we won’t be studying that today.” Jason told them, earning smiles and sighs of relief. “I take it everyone here knows how to read and write, right?”

All of the class nodded back. Jason smiled back at them. “How about basic maths? Add and subtract, multiply and divide?”

Again the class nodded, including Carl who remembered that much from his school days before the apocalypse.

“Fantastic. That makes everything easier.” Jason told them, rubbing his hands together. “Now then, I’m going to explain how the classes with me are going to be for the next while.”

Carl’s eyes scanned the class as most of the students were all entirely concentrated on Jason at the front. Enid however, was focused more between Carl and Jason. She had a suspicious look on her face, clearly not trusting the older teen to take the class. Carl also noticed the two girls who were still admiring Jason with one even wondering how good he would be in bed. Carl could swear his blood was bubbling in his veins.

“We are safe from the undead freaks behind these walls but that may not always be the case.” Jason told them, suddenly much more serious. “So I’m going to teach you all how to kill the walkers and how to survive should anything happen.”

“We don’t need to know that.” Mikey spoke up.

Jason raised his eyebrows and folded his arms. “Why’s that?”

“My Dad says the walls are secure. Nothing is getting through living or dead.” Mikey answered. “That’s why the walls are there, so we don’t need to fight.”

“Even if that’s totally true, you’re still not safe.” Jason countered. “In case any of you don’t know, let me be clear. No matter how you die, you become one of them.”

Several faces in the class appeared to be shocked. They clearly had no knowledge of that fact.

“So you do need to know how to fight and survive.” Jason argued. “Because all it would take is for someone to die during the night.”

Carl winced as the memory of the flu at the prison ran through his mind. That’s what had happened to his friend, Patrick. He had got ill, went for a cold shower at night and had died. The next morning exploded into chaos due to the outbreak of walkers in the cellblocks thanks to him.

“So I’m going to teach you all how to survive, how to protect yourselves, your friends, your family and this community.” Jason told them. “You’re not kids anymore, you’re young adults and I’m going to treat you like young adults.”

“My dad’s not gonna like this.” Mikey commented, intended only for Ron, Enid and Carl but Jason heard it.

“Well, your dad can take it up with me.” Jason retorted before facing the class properly. “I’ll teach you all how to kill, how to scavenge for supplies, how to read maps and coordinate, how to select the best weapons and tools and more.”

The class fell back into silence and intently listened to everything he said.

“All of this will be done safely but there will be practical tests to make sure you are actually learning.” Jason continued, gesturing to Enid and Carl. “Two of your classmates are experienced with most of these things and will be able to help you.”

Carl shifted in his seat, uncomfortable with all the eyes suddenly on him. Though he was glad that the lessons would be more focused on survival, now he understood why Jason said there was no reason to worry.

“And on Fridays, I’ll have my friend Eugene join us.” Jason finished. “He’s the smartest guy I know and he’ll teach us simply tricks like water filtration and how to make batteries.”

“What gives you the right to lecture us about survival?” One student spoke up, earning a nod from Mikey on the other side of the class.

“Good question. Listen close because this is a good answer.” Jason replied, his expression stern. “I spent seven whole months on the road, six of them were spent all alone, just me and the undead, until I met Constable Grimes.”

Jason walked towards the student and leaned down so he was level with him, staring into his eyes.

“So if this place falls, I know I’ll be fine. I’ll survive.” Jason told him sternly. “So if you want to survive, it might be wise to listen to me. Satisfied?”

The student swallowed and nodded, slightly intimidated by Jason being so close and so stern. Jason stood back up to his full height and put his hands in his jacket pockets.

“Now then, as there’s a shortage of books and maps we can’t do anything today.” Jason told them. “So this lesson will be spent getting to know each of you. We’ll all get to know each other a little better.”

 

Two hours later Jason and Carl were walking back to their house. Jason had asked Carl to stay behind under the guise of planning future lesson participation. In reality, it had been to avoid any of the students from catching on that they were a couple. Alexandria was quiet at that hour, most of the adults were at work and most of the kids were at home playing. This allowed Jason and Carl to walk down the street holding hands.

They walked in silence but both of them had similar thoughts. They had learned a lot about the fellow teenage residents of the community and had established a plan of action to make the place safer. They both smiled. Simple actions like holding hands made them feel warm inside, despite the intimacy of holding hands paling in comparison to what they would sometimes get up to when alone.

As they turned a corner onto their own street they were stopped by one of the residents. The man was a head height taller than Jason with grey hair and a pronounced, dark stubble. He was heavy built with broad shoulders and dressed casually in jeans and a loose grey t-shirt. The man kept his arms folded over his chest as he blocked their way, glaring at them.

Jason let go of Carl’s hand and took a step forward, subconsciously side-stepping to shield Carl from the man. There may not have been any need to do so but Jason’s gut instincts told him otherwise. He glared back at the man, his shoulders tense and his breathing deeper. He was ready for anything.

“Can we help you with something?” Jason asked sarcastically.

“Yeah, get outta my town.” The man hissed back.

“ _Your_ town? That’s news to me.” Jason repeated. “And why should we leave?”

“You don’t belong here.” The man hissed back.

“Deanna seems to think otherwise.” Jason replied, shaking his head with a laugh. What a moron this one was.

The man unfolded his arms and pushed Jason strong enough to cause him to stumble back a few steps. The man was as strong as he was large.

“You’re a couple of faggots!” The man barked, visibly angry at being laughed at.

Jason tilted his head and clenched his fists. This man was yet another bigot and it made sense. Most of these cowards died out because of the apocalypse but Alexandria had kept them safe and shielded. They were still living in the past and this man was a clear example of that. He glared back at the larger man angrily.

“We’re not leaving.” Jason replied. “So you can take your bigotry and stick it.”

“There’s room for all of us.” Carl tried to calm things down.

“Shut your mouth.” The man growled and grabbed Carl’s forehead before pushing him back, knocking him off his feet.

As Jason watched Carl hit the ground he felt everything slow down. He knew Carl was unharmed, the younger teen could survive falling on his backside. The fact that this man, this bigot, had not only insulted Carl but had now attacked him was more than Jason could handle. Everything moved slowly as memories shot through his mind, flashing before his eyes.

_“Don’t you touch him you bastard!” Kellin shouted from the other doorway._

_For the first time in his life, Kellin stood up to his father and rushed to rescue Jason from the old thug. As he rushed towards the two of them, his father’s grip on the beer bottle changed. Jason noticed this and tried to speak but everything happened far too fast for him to get any words out. As soon as Kellin reached them his father swung the beer bottle straight into the side of his head, the glass smashing into bits from the impact as beer spilled onto the carpet. Kellin dropped to the floor with a howl of pain as blood ran down his face from where the glass had cut him._

_“First, we’re going to beat Daryl to death. Then we’ll have the girl.” Joe taunted him sadistically. “Then we’ll beat your friend to death. Then we’ll have the boy. Then I’m gonna shoot you and then we’ll be square.”_

_Joe laughed malevolently in Rick’s ear. Daryl’s beating continued to get worse. Michonne was powerless. Rick was powerless. The fat man pushed Carl onto the ground, holding him down and trying to get to his belt. Joe continued laughing. Jason grabbed the barrel of the gun above him and forced it aside, trying to break free but received a kick to the ribs as a result. Carl continued to cry in fear._

_“Let him go.” Rick growled._

_“Stop your squirming.” The fat man cackled, overpowering Carl._

Returning to reality Jason realised why those memories had flooded his mind. Both times someone he loved had been in danger or had been hurt and he had been powerless to help. He hadn’t stopped Kellin’s father from smacking him with the bottle. He hadn’t stopped that fat thug from trying to rape Carl. Both times he had been utterly useless. He refused to be useless a third time. No one was going to hurt his boyfriend. No one.

Jason’s gaze fixed on the angry man before he shot forward. The man’s face flashed with surprise before Jason’s fist collided with it as hard as he could, his knuckles splitting from the force of the punch. The man stumbled back but retained his balance, before he could react Jason’s other fist collided with the other side of his face. This punch was weaker than the first, giving the man time to react.

Jason moved in again but was halted in his tracks by the man’s large hand wrapping itself round his neck. The large man held Jason at arm’s length, squeezing his neck tightly enough to choke him. Instinctively, Jason kicked the man in the gut with enough force to make him let go. Jason rubbed his neck and coughed as air returned to his lungs. This gave the man time to close the gap between them and deliver a powerful punch that sent Jason crashing to the ground.

Before he could get back on his feet the click of a gun hammer sounded. The older man raised his hands as the gun was pointed at him. Jason looked up above him to find the metallic barrel of a Colt Python. He tilted his head further back to see that Rick was holding the gun at the man.

“That’s enough.” Rick growled before nodding to Michonne who was with him.

Michonne made her way behind the man and held his hands behind him. She looked at Carl and Jason with concern, noticing that Carl was unharmed but Jason’s lip was bleeding.

Rick holstered his revolver and tilted his head. “What’s your name?”

“Kevin Taylor.” The man answered, revealing his identity.

Rick nodded to Michonne. “Take him to Deanna, tell her what happened.”

Michonne nodded in response and walked Kevin towards Deanna’s house. As they walked away, Rick held out his hand and helped Jason to his feet. Carl was instantly by his side, concerned etched on his face as the blood rolled down Jason’s chin.

“You alright?” Rick asked him.

Jason nodded, dabbing his lip with the back of his hand. “I’m fine.”

“What was that about?” Rick asked him, narrowing his eyes.

“Just a typical bigot.” Jason told him. “Pushed Carl to the floor so I lost it.”

Rick’s attention immediately turned to Carl. “You okay?”

Carl nodded, he was unharmed. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

“I’ll talk to Deanna.” Rick told them. “I won’t have that.”

“It shouldn’t happen again.” Jason replied, wincing from the pain in his lip. “Bigots like him are cowards, he should back off.”

Rick nodded. He wasn’t going to tell them but his opinion hadn’t been changed. He would discuss it with Deanna and have the man dealt with. Kevin would either have to learn how to live there or he would have to leave. Rick would not tolerate anyone trying to harm his son in any way.

“You could go to the infirmary, get Rosita to take a look at that.” Rick suggested to Jason.

Jason shook his head. “It’s nothing serious. I’ll put a cold wet cloth on it at the house.”

Rick rested his hands on his hips and looked around before nodding. “Alright, I’ll see you later. Don’t forget the party.”

“We won’t.” Carl answered with a soft smile.

Rick headed for Deanna’s place while Jason and Carl headed back to the house. As they walked Carl laced his fingers in between Jason’s and held the older teen’s hand. This earned a smile from Jason.

Once they were in the house Jason’s lip had stopped bleeding. A dull pain continued to throb through it, causing Jason to dab it with his finger tips from time to time. Carl sat on their bed and watched as Jason put on his fingerless gloves and holstered his machete. He had told Carl that he would go on a run to get some books for the class. Carl didn’t appear to be comfortable with it.

“That still looks sore.” Carl commented, referring to Jason’s lip.

“It is.” Jason answered with a nod before smirking mischievously. “Kiss it better?”

Carl grinned and nodded before standing up to kiss Jason gently. They both smiled into the kiss before breaking apart, staring softly into each other’s eyes.

“Can’t I come with you?” Carl asked, not wanting to stay in the house while Jason was in potential danger.

Jason shook his head. “No, I’m faster on my own.”

Carl was about to protest some more but Jason placed a finger to Carl’s lips.

“I won’t do anything stupid, I promise.” Jason told him. “If it gets too dangerous I’ll just come back.”

Carl sighed and lowered his gaze. He nodded his head in reluctant acceptance as it was one argument he wasn’t going to win.

“Focus on taking care of your sister and getting ready for the party.” Jason told him. “Time will fly by if you do.”

Before either of them could say another word, the distinctive sound of the front door opening and then closing sounded from downstairs. Footsteps thudded along the wooden floor before Michonne’s voice called out.

“Carl, are you here?” Michonne called.

The two teens left the bedroom and stood at the top of the staircase.

“Deanna wants to talk to you about what happened.” Michonne told the boy who nodded with another sigh.

“Just Carl?” Jason asked. He didn’t like not being able to give his own testimony.

Michonne nodded. “Just Carl.”

The two teens made their way downstairs and followed Michonne out the front door. Once they were out on the porch, Jason quickly pulled Carl against him and kissed him gently. When they broke apart, they became aware of Michonne staring at them, hands on hips and a grin on her face.

“I’ll see you when I get back.” Jason told Carl with a smile.

They then went their separate ways, Michonne and Carl heading for Deanna’s house while Jason made his way to the armoury.

 

“Jason, right?” Olivia questioned, double checking that she remembered his name correctly.

“That’s right.” Jason replied with a nod.

“What can I do you for?” The large woman asked as Jason walked further into the armoury.

“Just came by to grab my gun.” He told her. “I’m heading out on a quick supply run.”

“I’m sure Nicholas and Aiden could get whatever it is.” Olivia suggested as she watched Jason open the gun crate.

“This won’t take long.” Jason told her, finding his gun and holster. “It’s just some books for the kids.”

“You really shouldn’t go alone.” Olivia told him. “Deanna doesn’t like it when people leave on their own.”

“He won’t be alone.” Aaron’s voice sounded from the doorway.

Both Olivia and Jason turned to look at the clean shaved man who stood in his blue jacket with his rifle in his hands. His eyes looked upset but his body language contradicted them. He was masking how he felt about something.

“I didn’t know you were going with him.” Olivia stated with relief. “Never mind me, then!”

Jason stared at Aaron, trying to figure out what he was up to. He didn’t know where Jason was planning to go and had already offered up his assistance. Jason considered knocking back the offer but given that it stopped the large woman from pestering him he decided to let it slide.

“I don’t really need help.” Jason told him. He was getting tired of everyone questioning him.

“Yes you do.” Aaron answered quickly. “I know the area and you don’t. It’ll be faster.”

Jason sighed and holstered his Operator handgun on his thigh before walking past Aaron. “Come on then.”

 

“So, you’re saying that Jason didn’t start the fight?” Deanna questioned Carl.

Carl was sat across from her like he had been upon their arrival to Alexandria. The video camera was recording his every movement and every word as the congresswoman interrogated him about the fight with Kevin.

Carl nodded. “Kevin started the argument. He pushed Jason and then he knocked me down.”

“And that’s what provoked Jason to attack him?” Deanna questioned further.

Carl nodded again.

“Does he usually react like that?” Deanna asked the boy. She felt that the violence had been excessive.

Carl shrugged. “I don’t know, he argues with Gabriel a lot but all the other people have tried to kill us.”

“Would you have done the same as Jason?” Deanna asked.

Carl shook his head. “No but I don’t know what I would have done.”

Deanna thought for a few moments before leaning forward. “Carl, you and Jason will need to be careful with your relationship. I can’t punish Kevin for having different views.”

“Are you going to punish Jason?” Carl asked quickly, staring right back at her.

Deanna shot Carl a friendly smile before shaking her head. “Not this time. But it can’t happen again.”

Carl smiled back and nodded. He was glad that his boyfriend wouldn’t get punished for standing up for himself and for Carl. Not only that but he had been looking forward to the party that night and he wanted Jason to be there with him. It wouldn’t be the same otherwise. Carl hoped that Jason would be back from his run as soon as possible.

 

Jason and Aaron walked through the woodland together in silence. Aaron had informed him of a nearby town that had a book shop that would have what he was looking for. Jason didn’t want to have Aaron dragging along with him as he had actually just wanted some time alone to think about things. As pleasant as the community was it almost felt claustrophobic. It was like before the apocalypse, people having regular lives and judging the quality of life of those around them. He hated that side to society. People always found a reason to dislike you.

“I hear you had a fight with Kevin.” Aaron commented as they walked, breaking the silence.

Jason stayed quiet as he stayed on the lookout for walkers. They always had a habit of appearing out of nowhere and he wasn’t about to let idle chit-chat distract him from any potential danger. He also wasn’t sure what to say to Aaron’s statement.

“I know what it’s like. Eric and I have received our fair share of nasty comments from some otherwise wonderful people.” Aaron continued as they walked through the foliage. “It’s best just to ignore it as much as you can and keep out of their way.”

Jason stopped in his tracks and sighed, staring at Aaron. “Really? Keep out of their way? I don’t think so.”

“It would be the best way to keep everything peaceful.” Aaron replied. “Otherwise you could be fighting quite a few people.”

Jason resumed his walking pace but continued the conversation. “Why did you insist on coming out here with me? I know it wasn’t to help.”

Aaron thought about his answer for a moment as they walked together, the birds chirping in the branches above them.

“I thought it would be an opportunity to get to know you. You’re one of the few who trusted me back at the barn.” Aaron explained. “And I know why some people in Alexandria are scared of you. They’re scared of me too.”

Jason sniggered. “Well, if they’re gonna treat me like Kevin did then they are right to be afraid.”

“Most of them won’t but some people are still living in the past.” Aaron explained. “It’s bad enough for Eric and I, but your relationship with Carl is worse because of his age.”

Jason stopped again and glared at Aaron suspiciously. “Does it bother you?”

Aaron’s eyes shifted around them before he shook his head. “No, of course not. I know he loves you. You’re not… you know, using him.”

Jason nodded slowly and continued walking. “Then the rest of them can learn to respect that.”

“Why do you insist on fighting them?” Aaron asked as the snarls of a nearby walker travelled through the air.

“Because who someone falls in love with should have stopped being such a big deal when the dead started eating people.” Jason answered gruffly. “They need to sort out their priorities.”

“They’re scared of you because they don’t understand you.” Aaron told the younger male. “They know me so they don’t worry about me as much.”

“They’re scared because they’re weak.” Jason retorted cynically. “They know that if the shit hits the fan they’ll all die.”

“We can make them change, that was why I wanted your group to be here.” Aaron responded. “I meant it when I said that you can make us stronger.”

“That’s going to be easier said than done and you know that.” Jason replied, looking out for the walker that they could hear getting closer.

“Most of them are really good people. Give them a chance, let them get to know you.” Aaron continued. “You’re going to the party, aren’t you?”

Jason sighed and nodded. “Yeah, I’ll be there.”

Aaron smiled. “Make sure you talk to people and relax for once. They’ll see you are just like them.”

The walker stumbled out from behind a tree and growled at them, a W carved into its forehead. Before it could even raise its arms to grab Jason the young man had already sliced its head in half with his machete.

“I’m not like them.”

 

The town was abandoned and silent. Jason was beginning to believe the claims of Deanna and Aaron that the area had been evacuated and that there was a low population of undead. Experience reminded Jason that looks could always be deceiving so he sheathed his machete and pulled out his handgun, switching the safety off.

Aaron crouched beside Jason behind a burnt out car and used his rifle’s scope to survey the area. There were no signs of walkers or of people. No birds sang in the trees above. The only sounds were the rustling of leaves and paper on the ground as the wind blew against them. His aim settled on the bookshop they were planning to raid. The window was undamaged and the door was shut, both were promising signs.

“Let’s do this. A quick in and out.” Jason told him quietly. “If there’s trouble we get out, we both have someone waiting for us back home.”

Aaron nodded in agreement before following Jason out from behind the car. They made their way down the street, constantly on the lookout for walkers or people but were met with empty streets and abandoned cars. Once they reached the door of the bookstore Jason placed his hand on the door and raised his gun with his other hand. Aaron stood behind him with his rifle at the ready.

After a count of three, Jason pushed open the door of the bookstore and stepped inside, aiming his gun in all directions as he scanned for any threats. The familiar stench of death filled the air and attacked their senses but there was nothing but silence and no walkers came into view. He raised his hand and gestured for Aaron to join him inside.

The bookstore was abandoned. Dust covered the shelves, books and front desk. The front window had turned dark brown from all the dirt and dust that covered the glass. The air was stuffy and stank of rotting flesh. Cob webs covered the ceiling and some of the higher shelves, their sticky silk littered with dead flies. As the two men quietly made their way through the store to check for walkers they found a possible source for the stench.

In the children’s book aisle lay the corpse of an old man. The lower legs looked like they had been chewed away and there was a deep cavity where his ribcage used to be. The skin was rotten and it was clear it had been host to maggots and other insects. The state of the body allowed Jason and Aaron to relax. It wasn’t a walker otherwise it would have already woken up.

Aaron let his rifle hang by his side from a strap as he started collecting notebooks, agendas and stationary items. Jason proceeded further into the store to check the back room as the stench of death increased the further he went. He made his way through an empty doorway and turned the corner into the hallway. The hallway was short but what lay at the end of it made Jason freeze on the spot.

The door to a supply room hang ajar and beyond it stood a pack of walkers. They hadn’t noticed Jason so they simply remained standing motionless until something stimulated them. Unsure of how many there were and not wanting to make things difficult, Jason crouched down and silently made his way up to the door. His thighs burned with the strain of keeping his body low but the knowledge of what would happen if he stood up straight made him ignore the pain. He reached the door and as slowly and gently as he could, he closed the door over.

Jason remained crouched as he made his way back to the empty doorway before returning to his full height. Aaron turned to him and gave him a curious look, prompting him to gesture to the back storeroom before raising his pointing finger to his lips. The older man understood the message and continued gathering the items they had come for.

Jason scanned one of the other aisles and smiled when his eyes rested on a large collection of comic books. Apart from Enid’s comic book that they had found in the second house, Carl hadn’t had the opportunity to read any comic books since he and Jason had met. Jason decided to change that by taking as many interesting comics as he could find. This also meant there would be no need to borrow any of Enid’s comics.

Once Jason had lifted all the comics that he could for Carl, he quickly grabbed as many maps of the local area as he could carry. If he was to teach the class how to survive they would need to learn how to use maps. Aaron’s earlier comment rang through his mind and he realised that the older man was right. The group, led by Rick, was formidable, dangerous and was full of expert survivalists. If the people of Alexandria were going to survive, they would need to learn from the group so that they could protect themselves in this dangerous world. Teaching the children was the first step and Jason saw no reason why adults couldn’t also join in on the classes.

Jason zipped up his bag as Aaron did the same with his. They slung their bags back over their shoulders and onto their backs and headed back towards the front door. As they made their way to the door, one of the bags tapped against the lamp on the desk and before either of them could react, it hit the floor and smashed loudly. A chorus of snarls erupted from down the hall as the pack of walkers started banging on the door. The sound of splintering wood and the crash of something heavy hitting the floor told them that the walkers had broken down the supply room door.

The two men ran for the front door but as they ran Aaron felt something grab his ankle before he fell flat on the floor. Jason hadn’t been expecting the sudden movement and tripped over the older man’s legs, stumbling to keep his balance before slamming side on into one of the shelves, tipping it over with a loud crash. The corpse of the store owner that had been lying in the aisle was what had grabbed Aaron’s ankle as it weakly reached its mouth towards his leg. Aaron quickly unsheathed his machete and thrust it into the walker’s forehead, ceasing its movements instantly. Jason rushed over and helped Aaron to his feet as the pack of walkers flooded into the front of the store.

“Go, now!” Jason barked as he took aim.

Aaron seemed to hesitate before rushing out the door. All the walkers were in front of Jason and the door was behind him so there was no need to worry about him getting out. Jason shot two of the walkers so that their corpses would slow the others down. His plan worked with two of the walkers collapsing to the floor and several others tripping over them.

As the walkers continued to advance, half of them crawling along the floor and the other half slowly stumbling towards him, Jason holstered his gun and turned for the door. The rotting face of an old woman was suddenly in front of his own as the walker grabbed his shoulders and tried to bite at his neck. Jason grunted with effort as he held it back, not knowing where it had even came from in the first place. The other walkers were quickly closing in as he continued to stumble back and forth as he tried to push the walker off.

With the advance of the walker pack and the strength of the walker that was holding onto him, Jason quickly came up with a new plan. He hoped that his new leather jacket was as durable as his old one as he forced the female walker towards the store window. He let go of her neck and let his bite the arm of his jacket, letting out a quick breath of relief when the rotting teeth simply slid along the leather, squeaking as they did so.

Jason growled with effort as he started pushing the walker backwards, his arm in its mouth giving him more leverage over its centre of gravity as he pushed it towards the window. Aaron stood outside with his rifle aimed, growing increasingly worried about the younger man and why he hadn’t left the shop. Just as he was about to go back in, the front window smashed into hundreds of shards as the body of a walker came crashing through it. Following the walker and landing on top of it was Jason.

Aaron rushed over and quickly killed the walker with his machete, staring at Jason’s arm with great concern. Jason panted to get his breath back as he stood up and held his arm out, showing that the bite had not gone through the leather. The sound of glass smashing turned their attention back to the window as the walkers began climbing through. Snarls sounded all over the town as corpses started to emerge from the various buildings.

With a simple nod to each other, Jason and Aaron took off running back into the woodland as fast as they could. If they ran fast enough and far enough they would have a good chance of losing the herd that was forming behind them. Alexandria wasn’t far away and once they were inside the walls the herd would be nothing as not even a town-sized herd of walkers would get through the steel walls.

 

When they returned to the gates of Alexandria, Nicholas was there to greet them as it was his shift on guard duty. He nodded to Aaron as he walked in but glared at Jason. Jason glared right back, as if daring him to say something. Nicholas remained silent, however, most likely because of Aaron’s presence. Jason decided to ignore the dark haired man and continue walking with Aaron back to their street.

After checking the weapons back in at the armoury, they made their way through Alexandria together until they reached the corner of the main street. This was where they would go separate ways back to their respective houses, so Aaron handed Jason the bag of notebooks with a smile.

“I should head back, Eric is probably worried sick.” Aaron commented with a smirk.

Jason smirked back and nodded. “Yeah, Carl’s probably in a similar state.”

“I hope you all enjoy the party tonight.” Aaron said before turning to leave.

“Wait, Aaron. I have a question.” Jason stopped the man, hesitating as they stared at each other. “It’s a… well, it’s an awkward question but you’re the only person I know to ask.”

Aaron relaxed his shoulders and gave a friendly smile. “Anything. Ask away.”

“Do you have any supplies?” Jason asked hesitantly. “Since you and Eric live together and all…”

Aaron thought for a moment, wondering what Jason meant before it dawned on him. Aaron let out a small gasp of realisation and nodded.

“Yeah, we have a few things.” Aaron replied lowly, conscious of being in the street. “If you need anything, just come by and ask.”

Jason breathed out a sigh of relief and smiled, still feeling embarrassed at having to ask such a question.

“Thanks.” Jason replied.

Aaron smiled back before turning around again and heading down the street towards his house. Jason watched him go for a moment before he too turned and headed back to the house. He hadn’t been comfortable with Aaron joining him earlier but he was now glad that the older man had done so.

When Jason opened the front door and stepped into the front room he quickly dropped the bags to the floor. Carl jumped up from the sofa and rushed up to him, wrapping his arms tightly around the older teen with enough force to nearly knock him off balance.

“Sorry it took so long.” Jason told him, stroking the younger teen’s hair. “We ran into some trouble.”

“I know.” Came Carl’s muffled reply. “I saw the blood on your jacket.”

Jason let out a light chuckle. “Yeah, I won’t be wearing this to the party, that’s for sure.”

“We’ll be going over as soon as Carol finishes making the cookies.” Carl told the older teen, gesturing over to the kitchen where Carol was busy.

Jason nodded. “Alright, help me get these bags upstairs then I’ll get changed and we’ll head over.”

Carl nodded with a smile and picked up one of the bags while Jason lifted the other one. They headed up the staircase with Carl taking the lead, the smell of cookies baking filling their senses and making them hungry.

When they reached their room they set the bags down on the bed. Jason made his way to the wardrobe and pulled out another shirt before removing his jacket and unbuttoning his short sleeved grey shirt. He pulled on the new shirt, which was a different shade of grey and buttoned it up except for the top two buttons. Jason then placed his shirt and jacket in the laundry basket and turned back to Carl, who was watching him like a hawk.

“See something you like?” Jason teased with a wink.

Carl blushed and nodded, though this time he didn’t cast his gaze to the floor.

“Well, there’s something else you’ll like in the bag.” Jason commented.

Carl gave him a curious stare before unzipping the bag closest to Jason. When he looked inside his eyes widened and a grin formed on his face as he saw the large collection of comics.

“This is awesome!” Carl exclaimed excitedly. “Are they all for me?”

Jason grinned back and nodded. “Of course they are.”

Carl’s grin somehow grew impossibly wider as he threw his arms around Jason and hugged him tightly, a muffle thank you being said into his chest. Jason played with Carl’s hair before the younger teen looked up to meet his gaze. They closed the gap between them and shared a soft, loving kiss. They remained lip locked until Carol called on them from downstairs. It was time to go to the party.

 

After knocking on Deanna’s front door, someone they hadn’t yet met opened the door with a friendly smile and invited them in. Carol went first, carrying her tray full of cookies, followed by Carl, then Jason and finally Rick who carried Judith in his arms. They had all dressed smartly for the event and it was the cleanest and smartest they had looked since the apocalypse began. Carol smiled at everyone, continuing to hide who she really was with none of the residents catching on. Carl was in awe of the party, the house was decorated, food and drink filled the tables and the place was packed with people. Jason and Rick both had a more cautious approach, checking around the room by force of habit. The only difference between them was that Aaron’s words echoed in Jason’s mind enough to relax him.

“Oh my…” Deanna muttered and briskly walked over from the kitchen to greet them. “Welcome!”

Carol turned to face her with a smile beaming on her face. “Hi!”

“It’s so good to see you! Hi Carl. Jason.” Deanna greeted them all as she turned her attention to Rick. “Thank you for coming, you know I didn’t get a chance to interview this one.”

Judith cooed back at Deanna in curiosity, amazed at all the new sights, sounds and smells around her that were all a nonsensical blur. Carl smiled as he watched Deanna greet Judith with a mother’s smile and gestures. Jason stood beside him with his hands in his jeans pockets, also smiling.

“I envy her.” Deanna commented.

“Why?” Rick rasped, not sure what there was to envy about a defenceless, innocent baby.

“She’ll get to see what this place will become.” Deanna explained with a grin. “Come, come on in.”

Deanna led them further into the house as they all followed, with Rick keeping a constant watch of their surroundings. She led them over to the other side of the house where a smartly dressed man with glasses stood with a bottle of alcohol in his hand. Deanna told them to wait before she headed over to the man.

While they waited, Rick passed Judith over to Carl who smiled and kissed her forehead as he held her. Carol made her way into the kitchen to find out where to put the cookies and to help organise things with everyone. Spotting an empty armchair, Carl made his way over to it and sat down on it so he could sit Judith on his knee. Jason joined him, sitting on the arm of the chair and smiling down at them.

“It feels weird being at a party.” Carl commented as he pulled faces to make his sister giggle.

Jason nodded, looking around the room. “Yeah, it almost doesn’t feel right. Like we shouldn’t be allowed to enjoy ourselves.”

“But we can, can’t we?” Carl asked, feeling slightly guilty as the memories of their dead loved ones flooded through his mind.

“Of course we can.” Jason replied, rubbing Carl’s back and smiling at him. “This is real and this is what life should be about.”

Rick continued to study the people in the room as Deanna returned to him with the older gentleman by her side.

“You’re Rick.” The man stated, his voice gentle.

“Rick, this is my husband, Reg.” Deanna introduced.

“You’re a pretty remarkable guy.” Reg commented.

“How’s that?” Rick asked curiously.

“I watched the tapes, all of them.” Reg explained. “The things those people said about you, the things you did for them.”

Rick nodded, understanding where he was coming from. “Didn’t you build that wall out there?”

“Yeah, I did with help, a lot of it and it’s a damn incredible achievement.” Reg answered with a smile. “But, it’s a wall. Fifteen lives in this world, I think you have me beat.”

“Well, we’re standing behind that wall right now, dear, so let’s call it a tie.” Deanna remarked, earning a light laugh from the two men.

“I’m glad you’re here.” Reg told him. “Now, take a glass.”

“No, I’m good.” Rick refused, not wanting to start drinking after so long without any alcohol.

“You don’t have to be.” Reg pressed softly.

Rick stared back at him and thought about it. If all of this really was real, if they were truly safe behind those walls and the community was as innocent and benign as it looked, what harm would there be in enjoying a drink? Rick smiled and shook his head, as if to shake away his suspicions for the time being. He would allow himself to let his guard down for a little while. He reached for a glass.

“There you go.” Reg remarked with a shared laugh as he poured some whiskey into the glass.

Rick raised his glass and nodded. “Thank you.”

Rick took a sip of the whiskey, letting the strong taste of the alcohol attack his taste buds as he observed the front door. It opened and Jessie stepped inside with her two sons, Ron and Sam and a tall man who Rick assumed to be her husband. She looked stunning. He continued to watch her and took another sip of the whiskey, the warmth of the alcohol spreading through him.

Carl continued to sit on the armchair with Jason leaning against it. He preferred to stand since he had got them both a couple glasses of lemonade. Judith had gotten used to their surroundings and had calmed down, she sat in Carl’s lap quite happily. Jason observed the party, Abraham and Rosita were enjoying some beer, Glenn, Maggie and Noah were all talking and all around them people were talking, drinking and laughing. Music played softly from the stereo as a background soundtrack to the mix of conversations and clanging glasses.

The atmosphere was relaxed, friendly and happy. It felt strange to be standing in the middle of a joyful party after everything they had been through. So many people that the group had cared about had died so that they could reach this utopia. Jason had lost everyone from his previous life, there was no one left who had bared witness to his funny anecdotes, there was no one left who had seen his care-free smile. No one at the party, in the community or in the group had met Kellin. None of them had known him, they hadn’t had the fortune to share the experience of his fun, uplifting and optimistic spirit. Kellin had been like a puppy, no matter what he did you couldn’t stay mad at him because he was too cute.

It pained Jason to be enjoying a party when Kellin’s corpse rotted underground. If there was anyone who deserved to be at that party behind the safety of the large walls then it was Kellin. Unfortunately he wasn’t there. The world had taken him from Jason in an act of cruelty. He was forever grateful for the trust that Carl had placed in him and he never understated the importance of his love. Carl had brought Jason back to life in so many ways but some wounds could never be healed.

“…okay?” Carl’s voice reached Jason’s ears.

Jason turned his head to look at Carl, confusion written over his face. “What?”

Carl stared at him with concern. “I said, are you okay?”

Jason felt a pang of guilt before quickly answering. “Yeah, sorry. I was just lost in my thoughts.”

Carl seemed to understand what those thoughts were as his concern didn’t fade. “We could go home if you like.”

Jason sighed, he wasn’t going to ruin this for Carl. “Are you having a good time?”

Carl, slightly confused by the question nodded. “Yeah.”

“Then we’ll stay.” Jason replied, smirking as he saw Carl accept the answer.

“You’re Jason, right?” A gentle voice sounded from in front of them.

Before the two lovers stood Reg, a half full glass of alcohol in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other. He smiled as Jason nodded in response, the younger man’s eyes narrowed with suspicion.

“I’m Reg, Deanna’s husband.” Reg introduced himself.

“A pleasure to meet you.” Jason replied with a polite smile.

“So you built the wall?” Carl asked, looking up at the older man from where he sat.

Reg nodded. “With help.”

“You should be proud of it.” Jason told the older man. “Because of that effort, this baby here gets to live in safety.”

“We’re all proud of what we’ve managed to build here.” Reg replied with a smile. He held out the bottle. “Drink? It’s some fine Scotch.”

Jason glanced at his empty glass and raised his other hand. “No, I’ll pass.”

“There’s nothing wrong with having a social drink.” Reg encouraged gently.

Jason smiled back at his manners. “Alcohol and I don’t mix well.”

“Why’s that?” Reg asked almost immediately before hesitating. “If you don’t mind me asking, that is.”

“My uncle was a violent alcoholic, my father was also an aggressive drunk so he quit drinking.” Jason explained. “I also tend to turn quite nasty once I’ve had a few. I wouldn’t want to upset anyone.”

Reg nodded and lowered the bottle. “I respect that. Do you mind if I say something?”

Jason narrowed his eyes again and tilted his head slightly before shrugging. “Sure.”

“I saw the tapes so I know about your relationship.” Reg began, keeping his voice low. “Some of the people here aren’t ready to accept that sort of thing, so please try to be patient with them.”

“Do you accept it?” Jason challenged him, standing to his full height in defensive habit.

“Five years ago I wouldn’t have been okay with it. But after seeing all the horrors of the past, wars, terrorism, all that violence and death.” Reg explained. “And now this world where millions have died because of those things out there, I could never argue against love. It’s one of the few things we have left.”

Jason nodded and patted Reg’s shoulder gently. “You’re a good man, Reg.”

“Look, I’m going to give you both your space.” Reg concluded, preparing to leave. “But you should both try to get to know everyone. They are really nice people.”

“We’ll give it a try.” Jason replied with a nod and a smile.

With that said, Reg headed further into the depths of the party, probably in search of his wife again. As Jason and Carl watched him go, Judith cooed for their attention. Carl chuckled and started bouncing her on his lap again, earning light giggles from his little sister.

Jason watched as Carl entertained his baby sister, he smiled in amusement at the funny faces Carl would pull to keep her entertained. He was also smiling because of the look of joy in Carl’s eyes, his younger lover for the time being was completely engrossed in the festive atmosphere of the party and was enjoying playing with his little sister. This was what Carl’s life should have been about, getting to be this awesome big brother in a world of complete safety without the threat of walkers. Jason didn’t really mind not being a part of that hypothetical life either. He would still have been with Kellin if it had been the case.

After a few moments, Carl’s eyes darted up briefly and caught Jason’s own eyes that were staring with unwavering concentration. He felt slightly sheepish under such a gaze because he knew Jason was deep in thought again but he also knew that this time he was the subject matter.

“What?” Carl asked with a nervous chuckle.

“Just love to see big brother Carl in action.” Jason replied with a grin. “It’s really cute.”

Carl’s face painted itself with a faint trace of red at the compliment. He didn’t think he’d ever get used to them.

“Alright, you guys are not spending the whole party in this corner.” Tara’s voice reached them as she came up to them. “And I’m not going the whole night without getting a turn of Judith.”

They both laughed at their young female friend before Carl kissed Judith’s forehead and handed her over. Judith instinctively cuddled into Tara’s shoulder as she held the little bundle in her arms, smiling back at the boys. Carl pulled Jason’s arm to get his attention and pointed to the other side of the room. Jason turned to follow his gaze.

“Ron and Mikey are here.” Carl pointed out, pulling Jason with him. “Come on.”

They quickly covered the distance of the room and reached the two teenage boys who had been so busy talking that they hadn’t seen them approach.

“Hey guys.” Carl greeted, high fiving both of them in turn.

“Hi Carl.” Ron greeted with a cheerful smile before high fiving Jason. “Jason.”

“You guys enjoying the party so far?” Mikey asked them, his focus more on Carl than Jason.

Carl nodded, totally relaxed now that he was with friends. “Yeah, it’s really good.”

“We never thought we’d ever be at another party.” Jason commented with a smile.

Ron smiled back in understanding. After surviving in the cruel world outside the walls it wasn’t a surprise that any hopes of civilization returning had dwindled out of them. Mikey didn’t smile at Jason, however, he simply stared before returning his focus to Carl. Jason narrowed his eyes, he didn’t like how Mikey was acting around him. He decided it was wise not to say anything.

The front door closed as Olivia stepped inside to join the party. From the corner of the room, Rick and Carol watched her as she was welcomed in while keeping their distance from everyone else.

“Look, she’s here, which means it’s empty, so…” Carol commented, referring to the armoury.

“I’ll go with you.” Rick stated, standing up from his leaning position against the wall.

“No. Remember?” Carol replied as she slipped behind him.

Rick snorted with amusement before repeating her statement from earlier that day. “You’re invisible.”

“Hey! Rick!” Jessie’s voice called from ahead of him, instantly getting his attention.

Rick walked over to her as she pointed to the tall man behind her.

“This is my husband, Pete.” Jessie introduced.

“Hey, it’s good to meet you.” Pete greeted as the men shook hands. “I want to thank you for taking up being our constable, if we keep growing at this rate we’re gonna need even more.”

“Hope so.” Rick replied with narrow eyed stare. He couldn’t shake his feelings of jealousy.

“You wanna come by my office next week, I’ll take a look at you.” Pete offered cryptically.

Rick studied him curiously, unsure of what his intentions were.

“And I probably should have said that I was a doctor first.” Pete finished with a laugh that Jessie shared.

Rick relaxed and smiled along with them.

“Well, I think it sounded nice either way.” Jessie commented, looking between them.

“I’m going to get us a refill.” Pete told them, stepping closer and taking Rick’s empty glass.

“I can do it.” Jessie told him, placing a hand on her husband’s back.

“I’m on it.” Pete affirmed before walking off.

“Having fun?” Jessie asked, still smiling.

Rick nodded and smiled, happy to be alone with her again. “Yes I am.”

“That was kind of a stupid question, right?” Jessie asked, scrunching her face up at her own stupidity.

Rick lightly laughed with her but shook his head. “No.”

“But still, this place still has a pretty amazing view.” Jessie commented, her eyes scanning their surroundings.

Rick looked around, a little confused. “Yeah?”

Jessie grinned. “Yeah, take a look.”

Rick’s eyes scanned the surroundings of the party. Various Alexandria residents were talking, drinking and laughing. Among them were Glenn, Maggie, Noah, Rosita and Abraham who were all gathered together in a conversation with some other members of the community. Their laughter showed they were having a good time.

“An ordinary life like before.” Jessie commented, turning back to face Rick. “Well, not like before.”

Rick shared her pain with that statement. He’d give anything to have his old life back. “No.”

“Yeah, I know. I mean, I mean it’s better.” Jessie explained. “Not out there, in here.”

Rick lowered his gaze, she was right. It was better within the community but all he felt like they were doing was running from reality.

“You know, everyone’s been through it somehow. Everyone.” Jessie continued. “And a lot of things disappeared, but a lot of bullshit went with it.”

Jessie turned back to the party and observed all the people, especially Rick’s own group.

“They’re all from totally different backgrounds, different places, they never would have even met and now they’re part of each other’s lives.” Jessie explained. “They are each other’s lives. I’m just saying, we all lost things but we got something back. It isn’t enough but it’s something.”

Rick thought about what she was saying. It was true that all the people who were at that party and those who weren’t all had their fair share of horrors. Of course, Rick’s group had an even bigger share because they hadn’t been so fortunate as to wind up inside the community until two years after the initial outbreak. They were weak but they all had something in common. Inside those walls, they were all safe and that’s what mattered most. Rick’s children could be safe.

“No, it was a tie, man!” Carl’s voice sounded from behind him. “You saw it!”

Rick turned to watch his son playing some kind of card game with Ron, Mikey and his partner, Jason. There were smiles of joy and amusement on all of their faces as they argued over what seemed to be some kind of card game. Ron appeared to agree with Carl as he said something to the black haired teen before Carl was given his cards back. He observed how Jason stood over Carl, almost like a bodyguard or guardian. Even in a happy party with friends, Jason was subconsciously protecting Rick’s son.

Rick smiled, he was grateful that the older teen had come into their lives when he did and had bonded with Carl in the way he did. Carl had needed someone around his own age to be close to, though a romantic relationship hadn’t been what the constable had expected. He still wasn’t completely comfortable with the sexual aspect of their relationship which he was aware existed. Rick may have been getting older but his sense of hearing and his observation skills hadn’t faded. He trusted Jason and he trusted Carl, so he permitted it. He figured being uncomfortable with his son’s sexual activities was just part of being a parent.

He turned back to Jessie with the smile still plastered on his face. “Yeah, yeah it’s a pretty good view.”

They both smiled at the view and at each other.

“Mum!” A higher pitched voice called as Jessie’s youngest son, Sam, came bounding up to them. “There’s no more cookies.”

“Oh, well, I happen to know the cookie maker, she’s a good friend of mine.” Rick told the boy with a false expression of seriousness. “And I might be able to see about her making a whole batch just for you.”

“Mum, he doesn’t have a stamp.” Sam pointed out, staring up at his mother before turning back to Rick.

“Do you want a stamp?” The boy asked Rick who had crouched down to his eye level.

“Sure.” Rick replied with a friendly smile.

Sam pulled out an office stamp and took the lid off before pressing it ink side down onto the top of Rick’s outstretched hand. When he pulled it off, Rick could see the letter A printed on his skin in red ink.

“See? Now you’re officially one of us.” Jessie remarked, patting Rick on the shoulder.

Rick returned to his full height with a smile.

“Hey, Sam!” His older brother, Ron called from the far end of the room.

The young boy took off running towards his older brother who was still standing with Mikey, Carl and Jason.

“Sam, don’t run!” Jessie called after the boy in vain.

She beamed a smile at Rick and decided it was time to give him space. “I’ll see you later.”

“Yeah.” Rick nodded, a little disappointed that she had to go back over to her husband, Pete.

Despite his slight disappointment, he couldn’t remove the smile from his face as he thought about her and looked at the stamp on his hand.

Sam rushed over to Ron, Mikey, Carl and Jason with his stamp in hand before stopping before the group to stare up at his brother.

“What is it?” He asked expectantly. He and his brother had a close relationship.

“Carl and Jason don’t have stamps.” Ron told him with a grin, glancing to the two in question.

Sam’s eyes widened and he turned to look at the two older boys. “Do you guys want stamps?”

Jason and Carl shared a look and an amused grin before nodding to the younger boy. With the motion of their consent, the young blonde haired boy pulled the lid off the stamp and pressed it onto the back of each of their hands. Just like Rick, Carl and Jason now had the letter A stamped to their hands in red ink.

“Now you guys are official members of the community.” Ron told them with a laugh as Sam ran off elsewhere.

“Cool.” Carl nodded and laughed at the silly nature of it all.

Jason stared at the stamp on his hand. It reminded him of something but he couldn’t quite put his finger on it. As he continued to think about it he was interrupted from his thoughts by Nicholas coming over to see them.

“Hey boys.” Nicholas greeted before staring at Jason. “Jason, a word.”

Jason narrowed his eyes but nodded. He rubbed Carl’s back reassuringly before following the curly haired man outside onto the street. Nicholas closed the door behind them to block out the sounds of the party before joining Jason on the street itself.

“I’m only going to warn you once.” Nicholas hissed, his demeanour suddenly aggressive. “Stay away from my son.”

“Why?” Jason asked, his eyes narrowed and his shoulders raised.

“I saw the tapes.” Nicholas told him, the smell of alcohol on his breath. “You’re a paedophile and I won’t let you near my son.”

“That’ll be tricky.” Jason commented. “Given that I’m his teacher, remember?”

Nicholas took a step forward. “I’ll have Deanna change that. She’ll kick you out.”

“Then go and talk to her, tough guy.” Jason challenged him. “You think you scare me?”

“You’re not teaching my son anymore!” Nicholas argued. “I won’t let you near him.”

“Let me tell you something. I’m teaching that class how to survive.” Jason told him, standing his ground angrily. “I’m making sure that they are ready for this world if those walls ever come down.”

“My son doesn’t need to know that.” Nicholas growled. “Those walls won’t come down.”

“One day they will, and when they do Mikey will survive.” Jason told him sternly. “But it’ll be because of me, my lessons will have saved him because his coward of a father didn’t want to.”

Nicholas took another step closer, his fists clenched where they hung by his sides. Jason glanced at his fists and glared into the older man’s eyes with an intense, aggressive confidence. Adrenaline shot through his body as he prepared to fight.

“Go on, tough guy.” Jason hissed. “Give me an excuse.”

As angry as Nicholas was, Jason’s confidence was intimidating and caused him to hesitate. Most people his age would have been scared by Nicholas’ angry display but Jason was unfazed by it, he just stood in front of him waiting for the attack. Nicholas’ sensible side reminded him the other information he had learned from Jason’s interview tape, he had survived on his own for six months. Nicholas had to wonder how many people Jason had killed in that time and questioned himself over wanting to be the next one.

Nicholas glared back at Jason angrily before letting out a grunt of frustration. He unclenched his fists and backed away before walking away down the street. He didn’t say anything nor did he look back, he simply walked off to his house. Jason smirked at his victory and was disappointed that he didn’t get an excuse to attack Nicholas. The encounter did make Jason wonder why Aaron had had so much trouble, these people were cowards.

Jason shook his head and walked back up the steps, opened the door and returned to the party. He spotted Carl continuing to laugh with Ron and Mikey, at least he now knew what Mikey’s problem was though he knew it was better not to say anything. Watching Carl laugh from a distance made him glad that Enid hadn’t attended the party, he didn’t need her anywhere near Carl apart from at class.

“Jason?” Deanna appeared from behind a small crowd.

Jason nodded to her but remained silent, forcing himself to calm down after Nicholas’ verbal attack.

“I spoke with everyone about what happened today.” She told him sternly. “Kevin provoked it so you won’t be punished this time. But I warn you, learn some self-control or you won’t be staying here.”

Jason thought for a moment and nodded. “You’re blunt and to the point. I appreciate that. I’ll do my best not to be violent.”

Deanna continued to stare at him, trying to read how sincere he was being. “Good. I’ll let you get back to Carl.”

“Thanks.” Jason replied.

Deanna turned on her heels and disappeared into the crowd, returning to wherever she had come from. Jason made his way back over to Ron, Mikey and Carl, giving Carl a gentle shoulder squeeze upon his return.

Michonne stood outside on the back porch, she looked out at the surroundings before bringing her gaze down to the cocktail sword that she held in her hand. She rolled it between her fingers as she thought about her own sword. For the first time since the whole thing started, she was at a party, wearing a dress and didn’t have her katana on her back. Michonne felt naked without her sword and despite how peaceful the night was, she still felt on edge. Her vigilance and her readiness to react to danger had not faded.

Abraham came out onto the porch and walked up to her, standing beside her as he watched her twirl the cocktail sword.

“You packing different steel nowadays?” He asked gruffly.

Michonne sniggered. “Yeah.”

“You live by it, you die by it. You eat hors d'oeuvres with it.” Abraham laughed with her. “Pray to God you don’t have to use it again. Pray to God you don’t get used to not using it again.”

They fell silent for a few moments. They were both having trouble adjusting to a regular life after having been out in the apocalypse for so long.

“It’s on your back even when it’s off your back.” Abraham continued.

Michonne slowly turned to him. He wasn’t usually this talkative or philosophical and judging by his stance she could tell why he was being like that in that moment. She glanced at the beer bottle in his hand.

“How much have you had to drink?” She asked with a smirk.

They both laughed at the question.

“I am a large man and I have had many beers to make up for that” Abraham answered with a smile. “And you know what? By that brave act I have come to realise that things have worked out pretty damn well for me.”

Abraham changed his position so that he had his back against the support beam, facing in the opposite direction from Michonne.

“How about you?” Abraham asked, turning to observe her. “What have you done?”

Michonne thought for a moment before turning to him. “I put on this dress.”

Abraham smiled knowingly back at her. That answer wasn’t acceptable. “Try again.”

 

As Ron, Mikey and Carl all continued to chat away quite happily, Jason felt his mouth going dry from all the talking and decided to get more lemonade. He made his way over to the drinks table and put his glass down before reaching for the bottle and pouring the sweet liquid into it. As he put the bottle back down he looked at the stamp on the back of his hand. A red letter A. The memory of where he had seen it before came rushing back to him.

_Rick was about to pistol whip another walker with his revolver but the walker received a bullet beforehand. The echo of a rifle sounded around them. Rick fired into the woods in the direction of the bullet. Someone was shooting at them._

_“Get inside!” He barked to the others._

_Once Bob was inside the gunshots ceased. Rick quickly made his way back inside, failing to notice the letter “A” painted on the church wall with blood._

Jason clenched the glass tightly as he felt his legs weaken, forcing him to lean against the table. A sudden headache throbbed through his skull, the pain making him cringe at every laugh around him as if it was suddenly too loud.

_“You here to rob us?” Gareth asked, standing in the centre of the room._

_“No.” Rick answered flatly. “We wanted to see you before you saw us.”_

_Rick stepped forward and holstered his gun. Carl and Jason did the same._

_“Makes sense. Usually we do this where the tracks meet.” Gareth stated, stepping forward and clearing his throat. “Welcome to Terminus.”_

Jason breathed heavily as he tried to get the pain under control, he grit his teeth as his head continued to throb even more. The voices around him started to lose their coherency, all the words were slowly blending into white noise.

_They ran into another storm of bullets that forced them out into the open and back towards the fence that they originally climbed over. As they ran for it several armed people popped up from behind it, their assault rifles aimed at the group. Jason aimed at them out of instinct. Rick looked around. There was no escape. Assault rifles in front and snipers above. They were cornered. Jason slowly lowered his gun, breathing heavily. Outgunned and outnumbered yet again._

_Jason backed up towards Carl in an effort to shield him from any gunfire that may come. His rational side told him it wouldn’t make a difference but his instincts moved his body for him._

_Rick looked round at Carl’s terrified face, panting from fear and exertion. Michonne, Daryl and Jason all had grim expressions. This truly was the end of the line. They were trapped like the rabbit in Rick’s snare._

_“Drop your weapons! Now!” Gareth called from one of the rooftops. “Now!”_

_They all did as they were told. Daryl dropped his crossbow and knife to the floor. Michonne dropped her sword. Rick dropped his gun and his knife. Carl dropped his Beretta. Jason dropped his Operator and his blade. All of them except for Carl glared up at Gareth._

_“And the bag! Drop it!” Gareth shouted to Jason who reluctantly unstrapped his backpack and dropped it to the ground._

_“Ringleader! Go to your left!” Gareth commanded. “The train car, go!”_

_Rick looked to his left at the large train car marked “A”.  He didn’t move._

_“You do what we say, the boy goes with you.” Gareth told him. “Anything else, he dies and you end up in there anyway!”_

Jason gripped the table for support as he felt his sense of balance leave him. The horrendous noise of the voices around him and the throbbing in his head made him groan in discomfort.

_“So don’t you have a girlfriend you could be with?” The blonde asked out of curiosity._

_Jason shook his head and chuckled. “Nope, I’m a single pringle.”_

_“A solo rolo.” The blonde interjected with a laugh of their own._

_Both individuals laughed at the silly nature of their statements. Jason had successfully forgotten about his friend and found his attention being fixated on the blonde beauty beside him._

Jason’s mouth was getting drier, he grasped the glass of lemonade and took a sip before his hand shook, the liquid spilling onto the floor with each sudden twitch.

_He swung again, striking the man next to Jason before the man with the knife cut his throat open too. The blood drummed on the steel trough as it spurted and splattered out of the dead man’s jugular at high pressure. Jason tried to cut faster without being obvious. He was next and he hadn’t cut through the plastic yet. He would need to move but it would just get him killed anyway. Gareth had a gun and the men behind him had a baseball bat and a blade. With his wrists and ankles bound, he wouldn’t be able to defend himself either. Jason felt the sweat slide down his face. This was it then. This was where he would die. He regretted not spending more time with Carl. He regretted lying to Carl the night before. He regretted having let Rick and the other down. Jason closed his eyes and waited for the baseball bat to hit him. The bald man stood behind Jason and raised his arms back. His swing was ready. He swung at Jason’s head._

The clanging of glasses was high pitched and hurt his ears. He dropped the glass onto the table, the tumbler rolling across it and spilling the contents as he brought his hands up to grab his head.

_“You don’t have to do this we can walk away.” Gareth pleaded for mercy. “And we will never cross paths again, I promise you.”_

_“But you’d cross someone’s path. You’d do this to anyone, right?” Rick answered coldly. “Besides, I already made you a promise.”_

_Rick holstered his gun and pulled out his machete with the red handle and hacked into Gareth who desperately screamed for his life. Rick continued to violently hack into him repeatedly. Michonne started beating to death another Termite as did Abraham._

_Jason glared at Martin’s puffed up face in disgust. The man who had threatened to kill Carl’s baby sister. He pulled out his own machete and started hacking into him with speed and ferocity. The first strike split his head open, the second sliced it into two halves. The third slammed into his neck. The fourth into his chest. The fifth in the chest. The sixth in the chest. Blood splattered everywhere. His arm burned from exertion. His energy fuelled by adrenaline. He was doing what Tyreese should have done. He was making sure this man, this monster, this vile disgusting creature never laid hands on Judith or Carl ever again._

_The sounds of the blows, of slicing and the horrific screams echoed against the walls of the church as the rest of the group looked on in shock. It was one of the most violent displays they had ever seen and it was their group that was doing it. Eventually the screams came to a stop. The blows slowed down and stopped. All the Termites were dead._

Jason felt the whole room spinning around him. His eyes darted around but couldn’t seem to focus on anything or anyone. It was all a blur as each memory violently flashed through his mind, bringing all of the emotions and pain with it.

_Jason growled and swung a punch at the final youth with enough force to knock him off his feet. He jumped onto the youth, his knees on the boy’s chest as he angrily slammed punch after punch into the boy’s face. How dare he hurt Kellin. How dare he ruin their day. How dare he. The youth had fallen unconscious from the trauma of the punches, his face swollen and bleeding but Jason continued to punch him. His arms were numb. His fists were bleeding, his knuckles split open but he didn’t feel it. He didn’t care. This was punishment. He was going to put this rabid dog down._

Jason felt panicked, was he going insane? Or was his subconscious trying to warn him? They both used the red A to mark him. The Termites and the Alexandrians. Was this all an elaborate rouse to kill them?

_“First, we’re going to beat Daryl to death. Then we’ll have the girl.” Joe taunted him sadistically. “Then we’ll beat your friend to death. Then we’ll have the boy. Then I’m gonna shoot you and then we’ll be square.”_

_Joe laughed malevolently in Rick’s ear. Daryl’s beating continued to get worse. Michonne was powerless. Rick was powerless. The fat man pushed Carl onto the ground, holding him down and trying to get to his belt. Joe continued laughing. Jason grabbed the barrel of the gun above him and forced it aside, trying to break free but received a kick to the ribs as a result. Carl continued to cry in fear._

_“Let him go.” Rick growled._

_“Stop your squirming.” The fat man cackled, overpowering Carl._

_Joe continued to laugh in his ear. Carl cried out again. The fat man cackled._

Jason knew he was hated within the community. It was clear. They tried to pass it off as a couple ignorant individuals but he knew the truth. They all wanted him out because they couldn’t accept that he was with Carl.

_“Where’s Carl?!” Jason bellowed furiously, aiming at Phillip’s head._

_“You want him?” The Governor asked with a sadistic grin. “Here, have him.”_

_The Governor pushed a smaller figure from behind him towards Jason. Ripped jeans. Torn shirt. The sheriff hat falling apart. It was Carl. Carl stumbled towards Jason before looking at him. Jason felt his blood run cold. That one look into his eyes shattered Jason’s heart into a million pieces. Carl’s glazed, dead eyes looked at him as he snarled and stumbled forward. He was dead. Phillip had left him to turn into a walker._

_Jason collapsed to his knees and dropped his gun. He couldn’t. He had failed. Carl was dead. Everyone was dead. Everyone that had kept him alive was gone. Carl was the only reason he had lasted so long. He had promised Carl that he’d always keep him safe. He had failed. He had lost him. He had been too weak, too slow, and too stupid._

_Carl’s corpse descended upon him, snarling with outstretched arms. Jason instinctively grabbed him by his neck and held him at arm’s length. It was a struggle as he didn’t even want to. He had no energy left._

_“You know, he kept telling me that you’d come to save him.” The Governor teased venomously. “Said you loved him too much to abandon him.”_

Jason’s heart was pounding violently and his head was throbbing painfully. His legs shook and his knees threatened to buckle. Was he placing Carl in danger by being there? Were the people of Alexandria willing to hurt Carl in order to force him to leave? Jason knew Rick would never forgive him for any harm that was done to his son.

_He opened his eyes, not remembering when he had closed them as someone’s arms were lifting him off the floor and back into a sitting position. Kellin pulled him in close so that his head was against his chest. Jason wrapped his arms around him tightly as Kellin reciprocated the action. Another burst of lightning allowed him to see the bite in Kellin’s side, just below his last rib. Jason cuddled in closer and sobbed into his chest, leaving damp patches on his shirt as Kellin’s tears fell into his hair._

_“I’m so, so, so sorry.” Jason choked out between sobs. “Fuck I’m sorry, I fucked up. It should be me. Me. Not you.”_

_Kellin held him tighter, pulling him closer and kissed the top of his head._

_“It’s not your fault.” Kellin reassured him._

Jason forced himself to walk. He had to get away from the party, he had to get away from everything. He had to protect Carl and the others. Jason knew that he wasn’t welcome there and he knew that Enid would replace him by Carl’s side. He would slip outside and over the wall. No one would care.

_“I’m sorry, Bill.” Jason finally apologised, lowering his gaze and hoping no more violence had to take place._

_“No. No you’re not. Not yet.” Bill hissed back and aimed his M16 at the back of Carl’s head._

_Upon seeing Bill’s gun pressed against Carl’s head Jason acted on instinct. He attempted to lunge forward towards Bill but didn’t expect a powerful kick to come from the right. The young black man had kicked Jason onto his side and now hovered over him with his Uzi aimed at Jason’s head. Jason closed his eyes in defeat. At least it would be quick._

Jason was knocking things over and bumping into people as he made his way to the back door. He didn’t care what damage he did because he needed to leave. They all probably thought he was drunk anyway, using alcohol to drown his shame and guilt of being a paedophile.

_Jason kissed Kellin’s forehead and stroked his hair out of his face. His face had gone pale._

_“I love you. I love you so much and I always will.” Jason told him, squeezing his hand as his tears continued to fall._

_“I love you too. Always.” Kellin replied weakly. He smiled. That same smile Jason had fallen in love with the first time they met._

_Kellin’s breathing stopped and his grip on Jason finally loosened. He was gone. Just like that, the most important person in Jason’s life, the only reason he had made it this far, was gone. The last person in the world that he was prepared to lose now lay dead in his arms. Jason wailed with grief, his tears falling on Kellin’s lifeless face._

_As much as he wanted to just sit there and cry himself to sleep he still had something important to do. There was still a promise to keep. Jason pulled out the gun that Kellin had given him and flicked the safety off. He aimed it at Kellin’s head, his hand shaking rapidly as he continued to cry. This one simply muscle movement of pulling the trigger was the hardest thing Jason had ever been forced to do. He held his breath._

_“I’m sorry.”_

_Jason pulled the trigger and shot Kellin’s lifeless body in the head. Reanimation had been prevented. Now he was alone. Nothing would change that. No one would change that. He had to keep his promise. He had to continue living. Jason examined the gun. It was empty. That had been the last bullet. He threw the gun on the floor and held Kellin’s body in his arm and continued to cry._

Jason roared in pain as his headache intensified. He felt like his skull was going to explode and that his heart would do the same. He struggled for breath as he finally found the backdoor and forced himself out of it and onto the porch. Jason rested against the bannister as the cool air wrapped around him. The wall wasn’t far.

 

Rick finished another glass of whiskey as he looked out the window at the empty street. He couldn’t believe so many hours had already passed since they arrived at the party but he couldn’t complain. It had been a good evening and things were starting to calm down. He could feel his head swimming slightly with the alcohol but it was a familiar feeling that he welcomed.

“That’s a pretty good view too, isn’t it?” Jessie asked him, walking into the near empty room with Judith in her arms.

Rick turned to stare at her. He knew she was talking about the street outside but he couldn’t help but observe her. This gorgeous woman was holding his daughter in her arms as if she were her own child. That was a view he could definitely get used to.

“It’s been a long time since I’ve held one of these.” Jessie commented with a grin as she walked up to him.

“She and Carl, they’re why I’m still here.” Rick told her. “And I get what you’ve been telling me.”

“What’s that?” Jessie questioned, lifting Judith into a more comfortable position.

“Here isn’t that bad.” Rick answered with a nod. Jessie nodded back.

Judith started to get restless and began whining.

“Do you wanna take her?” Jessie offered.

“Yeah.” Rick answered with a smile and placed his empty glass down on the table.

Jessie stepped forward to hand Judith over and was a little confused when Rick stepped closer as well. She stared into his eyes which were staring right back into hers. There was something in his eyes she had never seen before. Desire. He tilted his head and continued to close the gap between them forcing Jessie to move her face to the side. Rick kissed her cheek.

Jessie stared up at him in confusion. She hoped that it was just a combination of the alcohol and the loss of his wife that was making him act this way. If he really had feelings for her then things would get very complicated because of her husband. At the same time she couldn’t deny the fact that her heartrate had accelerated. She smiled awkwardly before backing away. Jessie gave Rick one last nod before she left the room.

Rick was alone with his thoughts except for Judith in his arms. Guilt suddenly shot through him as he realised that the alcohol had clouded his judgement. Jessie was married, he couldn’t have her. Rick was trying to do to Pete what Shane had tried to do to him. It wasn’t right. Despite that fact, he struggled to care.

 

Jason sat on the porch, staring into the street ahead. It was the dead of night and the party was coming to a close. The fresh air had done him a lot of good as the throbbing in his head was gone and his heart was relaxed. Having calmed down from whatever sort of panic attack he had just experienced, he knew his thoughts had been wrong. Jason was wanted in the community and Carl wouldn’t replace him with a girl like Enid. What he needed was sleep and as he watched Pete, Jessie, Ron and Sam all head home he knew that meant Carl was free again. They would be heading home soon.

Suddenly something in the street caught his eye. He focused his attention to a couple of trees across the street from the porch. Jason’s eyes widened at what he saw or more specifically, who he saw. Dressed in brown cargos and Jason’s old B-3 bomber jacket with his blonde hair combed back and standing proud on top his head was Kellin. He was unharmed and alive and he was happy. He smiled at Jason and blew him a kiss before turning and walking back behind the tree.

Jason continued to stare at the spot where he had just seen the love of his life standing. So many emotions were flying through his heart. Guilt, shock, love, want, confusion and grief. It couldn’t have been Kellin because he remembered burying him in a garden. He had looked so real, he was solid, he had a shadow and everything. It was him, living and breathing in front of him.

“You okay?” Michonne asked, walking up to him.

Jason looked up at her nervously. He could see her eyes trying to follow what had caught his attention.

“Yeah, I’m just tired.” Jason lied as calmly as he could.

“What were you looking at?” Michonne asked bluntly.

“An owl. I was watching an owl.” Jason answered after a moment’s hesitation. “It was truly majestic.”

Michonne realised she wasn’t going to get an honest answer out of the teen and decided to back off. There was no point pushing him into answering a question he didn’t want to give an answer to.  

 

Jason closed the front door behind them as Rick staggered ahead. He had opted for another couple glasses of whiskey after Jessie had left the party and it had tipped him over the edge. Rick, for the first time since the CDC, was drunk. Carl carefully avoided his father and placed Judith gently into her cot. Rick slurred out a goodnight to the two boys before planting himself on the couch. Once he was laid out on the couch there was nothing that would be able to move him from there.

Jason and Carl couldn’t help but laugh at how carefree and careless Rick became when he was drunk. It was a stark contrast to the fierce, calculating and strong leader they had got to know. The two lovers made their way up the stairs to their bedroom, being mindful of the others who were asleep in their own rooms.

Jason closed the bedroom door behind them and cleared the book bags off the bed. He bit his lip as he watched Carl get undressed, his creamy skin being exposed to his eyes yet again. He decided to distract himself by stripping off his own clothes, knowing fine well that Carl was now biting his lip instead.

Once they were under the covers Jason pulled the younger teen towards him. They shared a gentle kiss while their hands ran over the expanse of one another’s bodies. The two of them were tired from the party but they still had some energy left over for each other. There was something seemingly perfect about being able to cuddle up together in just their boxers under the covers of their own bed.

Carl let out a shaky breath when Jason kissed his neck repeatedly and slid his body closer to Jason’s. Once he was close enough, he rubbed up against the older teen to reveal that he had grown hard in his boxers. Jason smirked against Carl’s neck and shifted his hips so that their groins met causing Carl to gasp when he felt Jason’s hardness rub against his own.

They stayed like that and took it slowly. Sharing soft kisses between them or peppering each other with gentle kisses on their necks. The whole time they would roll their hips and grind against each other so that pleasure would shoot through their bodies like an electric current. They instinctively pulled each other closer and smiled to each other before closing the gap for another kiss.

Over time the kisses grew in passion, changing from slow gentle kisses to intense tongue battles. The same was true for their hip movements as they had built up their pace to the point where they were rutting against one another. They had found the perfect angle for their clothed erections to rub against each other perfectly each time, sending sparks through their bodies.

Eventually Carl broke one of their many kisses to let out a loud gasp as he reached his peak and came in his boxers. Upon feeling his boyfriend throb and climax against him, Jason bit Carl’s neck and groaned against his flesh as he too reached his limit. The two teens panted and continued to rub each other’s backs. They knew they would have to change their underwear but before either of them could muster the strength to do so, they had both fallen asleep.

 

Carol pulled out a small collection of handguns from her bag. It was morning and Rick, Daryl and Carol had returned to their meeting place from the day before to continue where they left off. Carol had slipped out of the party and had managed to sneak into the armoury to steal some handguns.

“Take your pick.” She told them, holding out an automatic and a revolver.

“Look, I’ve been thinking. Do we really need these?” Daryl replied, refusing to take a gun. “I mean if things go bad then yeah, sure, we do what we gotta do but it’s like you said, we don’t need these for that.”

“Not yet we don’t.” Carol answered cynically.

“You wanted me to try, right?” Daryl asked Carol. “I’m good.”

Rick thought about what Daryl was saying. He was definitely being the voice of reason and he was going against Rick’s judgement. His mind flashed back to Atlanta when Daryl had sided with Tyreese to do an exchange which had gotten Beth killed. There was a possibility that Rick’s offensive approach may have let her live. He took the revolver from Carol’s hand.

The three of them then returned to Alexandria, walking through the gate and splitting off into three different directions. Rick continued his patrol of Alexandria as the constable and was deep in thought when Jessie’s voice caught his attention.

“Hey, Rick!” She greeted and waved with Pete as they walked past, smiling.

Rick smiled back and raised his fist to show that he still had Sam’s stamp on his hand. When the couple had turned their backs to him he slowed down his walking pace and watched them. The only thing in his way of getting with Jessie was Pete. Pete wasn’t that tough either, he was a doctor but he wasn’t a hardened survivor. He was also unarmed whereas Rick had a gun.

Rick reached behind his back and placed his fingers on the handle of the small revolver. One well aimed shot is all it would take to have Pete removed from the equation. It was tempting. Very tempting. Rick’s rational side kicked in to remind him that he was thinking like Shane and that was something he refused to do. He removed his hand from the revolver and let it fall by his side yet again.

As he walked down the street he heard banging coming from the metal wall. Rick stopped where he was and listened to the consistent banging, the unmistakable pattern of a walker looking for a way through. He walked between the houses and up to the wall.

Once he was against the wall he could see that the wall didn’t seem to move or vibrate with each bang from the walker. He could hear the snarls of the curious corpse coming from the other side and the smell was unmistakable. Rick placed his hand against the wall and then rested the side of his head against it. The vibrations were minimal. That’s when he realised how secure the place was and how secure it could be. For the first time in the apocalypse, there was a walker on the perimeter wall and he didn’t have to do anything about it. It wasn’t going to ever get in.

 

Jason woke up as he felt the morning sun heating his face. He covered his eyes with his hand to block out the sun as he sat up in the bed. Looking to his right he could see that Carl was still fast asleep. He always looked cute when he slept because of how peaceful he was. Jason yawned as he looked around the room. Their room. It was clean and well decorated. The bed was big and comfortable. He was sitting up in the bed that he shared with his boyfriend in nothing but his boxers. No clothes, no leather jacket, no gun in a holster, just the bare minimum. It reminded him of how his life had been with Kellin. He would often wake up in a similar manner.

Jason couldn’t help but smile. Living in Alexandria was going to be worth it if this was the start to each day. The sunrise could be seen from the window, the bed was soft and warm and his boyfriend was usually cuddled close against him. It was perfect because it was so exceptionally normal. Looking around the room gave no indication of a zombie apocalypse.

Beside him, Carl groaned as he woke up, his arms instinctively reaching for Jason’s body. His hands continued to pat the warmth of Jason’s side of the bed before they found Jason’s thigh. Carl opened his eyes and looked up at Jason who was smiling down at him.

“What time is it?” Carl grumbled out groggily.

Jason shrugged. “It’s Saturday, it doesn’t matter.”

“Good.” Carl answered.

The younger teen briefly sat up so he could wrap his arm around Jason’s chest before pulling the older teen back down into bed. He pulled the covers over them and snuggled into Jason’s chest, smiling contently.

 

**So… I have some apologising to do, huh? This took a very long time to upload, almost a month in fact. I’m really sorry about that. I have been working on it on and off over the past few weeks but have been unable to sit down for any great length of time.**

**Lots of things were happening in my life which took priority. I have exams in the second week of June so chapter 20 may not come out until the 20 th of June or so. I’ll try to get it done sooner than that but I can’t make any promises, I’m not Rick Grimes and I don’t have a machete with a red handle. **

**Anyways, I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. I’m not sure how I feel about it but I trust you’ll all let me know. If anyone is confused about Jason, yes, he is indeed going through some form of psychotic breakdown. There’s more of that to come.**

**Thanks for all the favourites/kudos/alerts/follows/subscriptions/bookmarks/votes etc.**

**Thanks to the reviewers of chapter 18: The_Man_Called_Madara, Sarah_94, TheBlueWinterSelection, FreeThe_Bliss, kgbufo, jar98, TheBearQueen, The Sorrowful Deity, APEX CALIBRE, sexy10, DarkScribe81, MagnificentFern, DarthGranola, SundayAL, angelicdamnation, rk0192 and that one guest.**

**Above all, thanks for your patience with this chapter. Only one person checked to see if I was alive. :P**

**Let me know what you thought of this chapter and I’ll try to get chapter 20 up as soon as possible.**

 


	20. Breakdown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the group attempt to integrate into the community, Jason struggles as the ghosts of his past come back to haunt him. Can Carl save him from his inner demons?

_Jason closed the car door behind him and waited for Sam and Carlos before walking away from the vehicle. They had just returned from a supply run and were carrying their bags up to their camp, stepping over the barbed wire fence they had set up. Living outside wasn’t always comfortable but it was the easiest option and with some wood, barbed wire and empty cans they were able to set up an effective perimeter._

_As they approached the small town of tents with a motorhome in the middle, the trio spotted most of the group sitting round a picnic table playing cards. Everything seemed to be peaceful and without incident. Carlos glanced up at the roof of the motorhome and narrowed his eyes in suspicion._

_“Tony’s not on watch.” He commented gruffly, stopping in his tracks._

_Sam scanned their surroundings for any sign of their missing group member but was unable to find any. The others didn’t seem to have realised that no one was watching out for them as they were too engrossed in their card game._

_“You two look for him while I let Kellin know we’re back.” Jason told them._

_They both nodded back in acceptance as Jason dropped one of the supply bags to the ground. He headed through the maze of tents towards the other side of the motorhome where his and Kellin’s shared tent was located. As he approached, he could hear muffled groans followed by a loud whine._

_Jason jogged up to his tent and pulled the front open. His eyes widened and his heart raced in reaction to what he saw. Kellin was pinned down on his front by the much larger man, Tony, who was so focused on his attempted rape of Kellin that he was ignorant to Jason’s presence. Jason let out an involuntary roar of rage and charged into the tent, grabbing Tony by his shoulders and pulling him off of a very frightened Kellin. Tony stumbled as he tried to regain his balance but didn’t have time before Jason’s fist slammed into his face, knocking him out of the tent._

_Jason followed him out and took another swing at the larger man that missed as Tony took a quick step back. Tony lurched forward and kicked Jason between the legs causing Jason to drop to his knees with a loud howl of pain. The younger man let out another howl of pain as a second kick connected with his face and knocked him onto his back._

_Jason groaned and opened his eyes, not remembering when he had closed them, to find Tony towering above him. The older man had one of his knees pressed into Jason’s chest and the barrel of his Sig-Sauer GSR was pressed against Jason’s forehead. Blood dripped from the Tony’s burst lip onto Jason’s face, adding to the trickle of blood that was flowing from his nose. Jason glared up at him with a mix of hatred and fear. He was fairly sure the gun was just for show but after seeing what Tony had tried to do to Kellin, Jason was no longer so sure of himself._

_Jason allowed his eyes to dart over to his right to stare at Kellin who was paralyzed to the spot with fear. He was too shocked and afraid to do anything to help his lover so he remained frozen to the spot, never blinking or moving._

_Suddenly, a large shadow enveloped them as Carlos pistol whipped Tony on the back of the head with his Colt Defender. Tony let out a growl of pain as he rolled off Jason onto his back. Carlos stomped on Tony’s wrist, his hand splaying in response to the pain as it released its grip on his gun. The soldier above him kicked the gun away and aimed his own down at Tony._

_“That’s the last time I leave you in charge.” Carlos hissed._

_Carlos holstered his Colt Defender and gestured to Sam and another man, Tyler, to restrain Tony. Before they could do that, Jason had picked up Tony’s Sig-Sauer GSR and had it aimed at Tony’s head, his hand shaking with the combination of nerves and the weight of the loaded gun._

_“Jason, don’t be stupid.” Carlos warned, slowly pulling out his gun again._

_Jason didn’t seem to hear him. He just continued to glare down at Tony. The man in front of him had tried to rape his boyfriend and he was expected to just let it go. He knew Tony would try again. His kind always did. Jason had the power to end it with a pull of the trigger. He had to keep Kellin safe._

_Kellin stepped forward and placed his hand on the barrel of the gun. He stared into Jason’s wild eyes as he slowly pushed Jason’s hand down, lowering the gun until it was pointing at the ground. He then moved his hand round and flicked the safety on, his other hand rubbing Jason’s back._

_“It’s okay.” Kellin told him soothingly. It was a lie but it had to be said._

_Jason turned his head to meet Kellin’s comforting gaze before he let out a loud breath, as if he had been holding it in. He loosened his grip on the gun and let it drop to the ground before Kellin’s arms wrapped around his body, pulling him into a tight embrace._

The soft but constant chirping of birds roused Carl from the sweet embrace of sleep. He yawned and rubbed the sleep from his eyes before rolling over onto his side. Carl couldn’t help but smile as he watched Jason sleep soundly beside him, an unusual serenity painted on his unconscious expression. Though the older teen always professed to loving and being happy with Carl, the younger knew that he lived each day in constant pain from the heartache that never seemed to fade.

Carl swore to himself that he would help Jason though it all, he would make the older teen happy again because Carl knew he deserved it. The younger teen also took the opportunity he had to admire Jason’s face and topless form. His heart swelled as he reminded himself that the handsome young man lying beside him was his boyfriend. It still felt strange to use that term as their relationship had just sort of happened.

They had been through so much in just a couple of months. They had seen death and destruction, the two most common things on Earth thanks to the apocalypse and the ever present threat of walkers. They had also shared beautiful moments together that would survive forever as good memories. Reflecting on these memories caused Carl to stop his train of thought for a moment. He had almost forgotten the morning Jason had rudely woken him up by tickling him. Not only had that flustered Carl as he hated how ticklish he was, it had also left him with a rather unwanted reaction in his lower regions at the time.

Carl smirked as an idea struck him. Jason was fast asleep beside him, completely unaware and defenceless. It was the perfect opportunity for revenge. Seizing the opportunity, Carl pulled back the covers to reveal Jason’s boxer-clad form before gently pushing the older teen onto his back. He admired the faint outline of abs next to the scar from when he had been stabbed. Carl’s eyes gazed down to the recent scar on Jason’s leg, a reminder of their escape from Terminus.

Carl lowered his hands to Jason’s sides and began tickling his older lover. Jason immediately stirred in his sleep, shifting his body in an unconscious attempt to escape Carl’s rapid, teasing fingers. Carl let his hands travel further up, pressing harder against the skin as his fingers continued to tickle the older teen. Jason continued to stir, his movements becoming more forceful as he groaned lowly in his sleep.

Jason’s groans quickly morphed into giggles as Carl continued his teasing finger assault on his body. Jason’s eyes shot open as he continued to giggle uncontrollably from the tickling, his gaze immediately locking onto Carl’s own eyes. Through his effort to suppress his giggles, Jason felt his breath hitch and his body twitch at the sight of Carl straddling him with his hands on his torso.

“Is there a reason why you’re tickling me?” Jason asked the younger teen with a grin.

Carl giggled in amusement. “Revenge for when you did it to me.”

“Is that right?” Jason asked rhetorically. “You’re going to regret challenging the tickle monster!”

Jason followed up his threat with his own hand shooting up to attack Carl’s sides, his fingers longer than Carl’s. Carl let out a shriek of laughter as Jason’s own tickle assault commenced, his body twisting reflexively from the tickling sensation as he tried his best to continue tickling back. The two of them were a laughing, twisting mess of limbs as they battled each other. Their throats were starting to ache from the laughter, their sides sore from the rapid breaths and their fingers sore from the strain of all the tickling.

The whole situation was silly and childish. It was a total contradiction to the world they lived in, a world of fear and death. As if ignorant to the world, they continued to indulge in the simple joy that their tickle battle brought to them. It was the perfect way to start another day in the apocalypse and it was something no one could take from them.

Jason decided to get some control over the tickle fight and surprised Carl by rising up and rolling over on top of him, smirking down at him victoriously. Carl had other ideas and let out a playful roar as he did the exact same back to Jason. The older teen let him do it as it gave him momentum to simply roll them over again. Carl grabbed at Jason’s arms, trying to get them under control so he could overpower his boyfriend but Jason simply chuckled in response and pulled himself free of Carl’s grasp.

The two boys quickly turned into a shuffling, rolling mess of limbs as they wrestled with each other for control. Eventually, Jason managed to end up on top of Carl and had his younger lover’s arms pinned above his head. The two of them panted from the exertion and stared at each other, Jason’s hands never leaving Carl’s wrists as he straddled the younger. Carl’s face flushed as his gaze met Jason’s before he bucked his hips up, grinding his hardness against Jason’s. They both groaned at the sensation, the only barrier between them was the thin fabric of their boxers.

Jason smirked and grinded his hips down against Carl’s, earning a lustful groan of pleasure as their members throbbed together. Both of their faces were flushed and they were panting from arousal. Jason leaned down, still holding Carl’s arms in place, and captured his lips with his own in a searing, passionate kiss. With each movement of his tongue he rolled his hips some more, their moans spilling into each other’s mouths with each roll.

Jason broke the lip lock to kiss Carl’s sensitive neck, loving the soft gasps that Carl made. He continued to kiss down Carl’s slim body, stopping at his nipples. He smirked up at Carl’s flushed face before licking one of the small buds while pinching the other between two fingers. Carl’s pleasure-filled gasps continued to escape his lips as Jason continued his ministrations, smirking all the while. Once both nubs were hard, Jason continued to kiss his way down the slim, pale expanse of skin until he reached the waistband of Carl’s boxers, a wet patch visible on the tip of the tent that had been formed.

Jason smirked up at Carl, who was watching his every move with dark eyes and red cheeks. He didn’t know what to expect as Jason had never had his head down there before. He bit his lip as Jason slowly peeled off his boxers to reveal his throbbing shaft, beads of precum decorating the tip. Carl let out a sudden, loud gasp when Jason’s tongue darted out to lick up the beads of transparent liquid. Jason couldn’t stop the grin from spreading across his face, this was going to be something new for Carl and he was going to do his best to make it memorable.

A low, long moan erupted from Carl’s parted lips as Jason lowered his head, gradually taking Carl’s ardent need into his mouth inch by inch. Jason let his tongue tease the tip and sides while his lips closed around the shaft to form a tight seal. Before Carl could get used to the new sensation of being inside the warm, moist cavern of Jason’s mouth, the older teen brought his head back up to the tip and then sank back down. Carl moaned again as Jason picked up a rhythm of bobbing his head along his throbbing member, his tongue licking up any liquid that spilled from the tip.

Carl was overwhelmed with pleasure, his legs shaking as his eyes fell closed and his head fell back to rest on the bed. He fisted the bed sheets, not knowing what to do with his hands. Noticing this, Jason grabbed the younger’s hands and placed them on his head. Carl quickly got the idea and threaded his fingers through Jason’s air while gently pushing his head down. After a few more bobs of his head, Jason released Carl’s shaft, kissing up the sides while looking up at his lover’s flushed face. Carl felt his heart pound and manhood throb in reaction to the lust in Jason’s eyes and the way his lips were puffed up and red from sucking.

“Move my head and control how fast I go.” Jason told him. “You won’t hurt me, I promise.”

Carl couldn’t believe the trust that Jason was placing in him to use him in such a way. His desperate need for release stopped him from dwelling on the ethics of it and instead commanded him to return his hands to Jason’s head. Once there, Carl carefully started moving Jason’s head faster and faster. He tried to make the speed changes gradual but Jason’s mouth felt so good on him he wasn’t sure if he was being gradual at all. All he could focus on was the burning pleasure shooting through his shaft and body thanks to Jason’s skilled mouth and tongue. Jason moaned around Carl’s member, sending vibrations through the shaft and causing Carl to let out a loud moan. Carl started bucking his hips, the pleasure increasing the faster and deeper he went in his lover’s mouth.

Jason was ecstatic over being able to pleasure Carl in such a way. The act itself wasn’t important but the pleasure it brought to Carl was. They needed as many moments like this as possible before the reality of the world intruded upon them once again. Jason never lost rhythm and never hesitated, even as Carl’s hips started bucking causing the tip of his ardent member to strike Jason’s throat. Jason was thankful that Kellin had been larger than Carl, providing him with ample experience and practice.

Suddenly, Carl tried to pull Jason’s head off of him. “Jason! Stop! I’m about to…”

Jason knew that Carl was hesitant about climaxing in his mouth, so he grabbed Carl’s hands and pinned them to the bed again. Once Carl’s hands were pinned down, Jason bobbed his head as fast as he could with Carl gasping and moaning above him, panting for breath as the pleasure increased and surged through him. With a final loud moan of Jason’s name, Carl exploded in Jason’s prepared mouth, his hips bucking with each burst of orgasmic pleasure.

Jason released Carl and swallowed his warm offering while watching Carl run his fingers through his locks of hair that were damp from sweat. Carl was panting and his eyes were blown wide with pleasure. Jason smiled and lay beside him, peppering his cheek and neck with soft kisses as he came down from his sexual high. Once Carl had finally relaxed he brought his hands down to Jason’s boxers, one of them rubbing over the achingly hard bulge that resided there.

“Your turn.” Carl told him with a nervous smile.

Jason stopped Carl before he could move. “It’s not easy and I won’t last long. Next time, okay?”

Carl pouted with disappointment, though a part of him was relieved he didn’t have to risk doing a poor job of pleasuring his boyfriend. He would stick to what he knew for now, so his hands quickly pushed Jason’s boxers down to release his trapped and weeping member. Carl wrapped his hand around it and started to stroke it as fast as he could, loving how Jason turned into jelly whenever his hand was on him. Carl leaned closer and kissed Jason’s neck as he continued to stroke the head of Jason’s solid manhood. Within a few moments, Jason gasped Carl’s name loudly and spilled into his hand.

As Jason got his breath back, Carl decided to experiment. He brought his hand up to his mouth and licked Jason’s essence from his hand, curious about the taste. Jason watched as his younger lover’s face twisted in mild disgust, clearly disliking the taste. This prompted a light laugh from the older teen who handed him a tissue from the bedside drawer before pulling him down for a kiss.

“It’s an acquired taste, don’t worry.” Jason told him, playing with Carl’s hair.

“How do I taste?” Carl asked, curious.

“Better than I do.” Jason replied with a loving smile.

Carl yawned and scooted up the bed to rest his head on the pillow. “I’m tired again.”

Jason kissed his forehead and rose out of bed. “Then sleep, I’ll be back after my run.”

Carl nodded lazily, his eyes already closed as Jason got up and got dressed for his routine morning run.

 

Jason did his best to keep his breathing even as he ran the perimeter of Alexandria. Controlling his breathing rate was something that he didn’t have to think about much after years of running. Yet again his mind was miles away from what he was doing as he was going over the previous night’s events in his head.

The party had been enjoyable, that was something he could not deny with the best will in the world. Despite how enjoyable it had been, it had also felt wrong, almost as if it were an insult to those who hadn’t managed to survive. He knew he shouldn’t think about it in that way but he had little control of where his mind wandered. The party had also highlighted to Jason just how weak and defenceless most of the people there were, their biggest worries being making dinners or how work was going instead of surviving and being safe.

One of the surprises of the evening had been Nicholas’ attempts to intimidate and control him. Although he had been drunk at the time, Jason knew fine well that there were sober thoughts that had spilled from the curly haired man’s mouth. Whether he would go through with his threat of having Jason removed from Alexandria would need to be seen but Jason doubted he would. Jason knew he would need to speak to Mikey, as any time spent around him would be awkward unless he cleared things up.

As much as he tried to push it from his mind, the most important moment of the evening continued to trundle through Jason’s thoughts. His rational side told him that he had hallucinated, that there was no way that Kellin could have been standing across the street. A part of him wanted it to be real, wrestling with the knowledge of his death in an effort to entertain the idea of having the love of his life back in his arms. Jason had promised a safe haven for Kellin and he had indeed found him. Unfortunately, it had come seven months too late.

Jason was shaken from his thoughts by the distinct sound of someone calling his name. He slowed his run to a brisk walk and looked around the street. The road was quiet, no one nearby nor at the windows of any of the houses. He snapped his head round when he heard the call again and froze in place as his eyes found the top of the street. Standing in the middle of the road on the T-intersection was none other than Kellin.

Jason’s legs shook as he took in the sight. Kellin looked just as radiant as he always had, especially under the glow of the morning sun. Just like the night before, he was dressed in the brown cargos and Jason’s old B-3 bomber jacket. His blonde hair was combed back and blew slightly out of place on the breeze. Kellin’s bright blue eyes beamed back at Jason as the blonde grinned, gesturing for Jason to follow him before he walked out of view.

Despite the panting for breath that his body was automatically performing to recover from the running, Jason had new-found energy and took off running as fast as he could up the road. He was not going to let Kellin disappear this time. He reached the intersection where Kellin had been standing but he was already gone. Jason desperately scanned his surroundings for any trace of his lover and quickly found him at the bottom of the next street by the perimeter wall. Kellin grinned back at him before climbing the wall and disappearing over the other side.

Jason dashed down the street as fast as he could, sweat rolling down the sides of his face, gasping for air as his legs burned from the exertion. He reached the wall and without hesitation began climbing the large sheet of steel. He placed his feet on the horizontal support beams while he grasped the vertical beam tightly with both hands, his arms straining from the physical effort of lifting his body weight up so high. Eventually, Jason made it to the top and after checking for any signs of walkers, he jumped down, absorbing the impact with the ground with his knees by bending himself down into a crouch. He had to find Kellin.

 

Carl has finished showering and getting dressed, surprised that Jason had not joined him in the shower like he usually did. He didn’t think much of it and made his way down the stairs and into the front room where he found Michonne. She was already dressed in her constable uniform and had just finished placing her sword on the wall, a symbol of partially letting go of the life of survival they had before.

The samurai noticed his approach and greeted him with a cheerful smile. “Morning.”

“Morning.” Carl repeated and looked out the front window.

The street was still quiet and there was still no sign of Jason. After the fight the previous day, a voice in the back of Carl’s head told him that he should be worried. He did his best to ignore the voice.

“Have you seen Jason?” Carl asked her, turning away from the window to face her again.

Michonne shook her head.

Carl furrowed his brow. “He’s normally back by now.”

Michonne made her way to the door and stood with her hand on the handle, staring at the teenager. “Then let’s go look for him.”

 

Leaves rustled loudly as Jason made his way through the woodland, crushing the dried up leaves beneath his feet. Kellin had disappeared again and despite calling on him a few times, he hadn’t reappeared. Jason stopped walking and sat on a fallen log, sighing loudly and silently scolding himself for entering the woods unarmed in the first place. Kellin was dead. He was chasing a ghost.

The rustling of leaves caught his attention, snapping his head up immediately, ready for the approaching walker. The sight that greeted him was not what he had expected. Standing a couple feet in front of Jason was an old man, his hairline was receding with most of his white locks trailing down the back of his head. His face was creased with age and sported a large white beard. He wore a beige, striped shirt with dark olive green trousers held up with suspenders. A gun sat in a holster on the front of his belt as he walked up to Jason, his boots crushing the leaves underfoot.

“You shouldn’t be out here.” The old man warned him. “It’s dangerous.”

Jason shrugged, not feeling threatened. “I can handle myself.”

“All it takes is one mistake.” The old man argued. “Do you want to put Carl through that?”

Jason glared at the man as soon as he mentioned Carl’s name. “Who are you?”

“Hershel.” The old man introduced. “And I’ve known Carl for quite some time now.”

“Yeah? Well, nothing’s going to happen to me out here.” Jason argued.

“It could and it will with time.” Hershel retorted. “Jason, the path you’re on is dangerous. You need help. You’re not alone anymore.”

“I know what I’m doing.” Jason spat back in irritation, standing up.

Hershel smiled back calmly. “No, you don’t.”

Jason snorted, annoyed and turned away from Hershel. He scanned the trees for any signs of Kellin.

“You’re going to get people killed.” Hershel warned him.

Jason looked back over his shoulder at the old man. “How’s that?”

“You’re being reckless.” Hershel answered, walking up to him and pointing towards the perimeter walls. “Behind those walls are people who care about you. You can let them in. It will help.”

“They wouldn’t understand.” Jason retorted, walking back to the fallen log.

“How can you know what they can or can’t understand if you don’t give them a chance?” Hershel challenged him.

Jason grunted in irritation and rubbed his temples, his head was starting to pound painfully.

 

Carl walked briskly down the street, his shirt and long hair blowing in the breeze as he looked around for any signs of Jason. Michonne had gone in the opposite direction to cover more ground. He strained his ears to listen for the pattering of running feet or the heavy breaths of exertion but there was nothing but the birds’ morning chorus. Carl was growing more uncomfortable every minute. It wasn’t like Jason to just vanish into thin air.

A reassuring figure was marching up the street towards him, a figure of authority and safety. Rick. Carl increased his pace so he could meet up with his father faster. Although he was relieved to see his father, it didn’t stop the expression of serious concern from adorning his face as if it had been chiselled into it.

“Dad, have you seen Jason?” Carl asked quickly.

Rick narrowed his eyes. “He’s not with you?”

Carl shook his head. “I haven’t seen him since this morning.”

“We’ll find him.” Rick told his son reassuringly. “Come with me.”

Carl did as he was told and followed Rick further down the street. The two of them kept looking around for any signs of Carl’s older lover. All they could see were the houses and the early risers of Alexandria. There was simply no sign of Jason.

The darker corners of Rick’s mind started to flare up. He knew there had been trouble the day before and although Deanna had told him nothing would come of it, he felt distrust seep through him. If the people of Alexandria had done anything to harm Jason, which in turn would harm Carl, Rick would kill every last one of them if it was necessary.

 

Jason rubbed the last remnants of sleep out of his eyes. His head was pounding worse, causing him to let out soft groans of discomfort. Hershel had left him alone for the time being but the sound of leaves being crushed by boots signalled that he wasn’t alone. Jason looked up and gasped in horror at who he saw standing before him.

Standing in heavy boots, beige cargos and a striped leather jacket stood none other than the awful leader of Terminus, Gareth. Jason was stunned at the sight of the cannibal who simply smirked back at him. He knew that Gareth was dead, he had seen him die when Rick carved him into pieces with his machete.

Gareth chuckled lowly in amusement before biting into some recently cooked meat. Jason knew the meat would be human, it was the only thing it could be. Gareth took a few steps closer before crouching down in front of Jason, the confident smirk ever present on his face.

“You know it’s only a matter of time before they get rid of you, right?” Gareth asked him, still smirking.

“Rick and the others wouldn’t let that happen.” Jason told him flatly.

Gareth chuckled. “They let us eat Bob’s leg, so….”

Jason clenched his fist and prepared to punch the disgusting fiend in front of him but before he could blink Gareth had pulled out his Beretta 92FS. With the gun pointed at his face, Jason had no choice but to sit back down on the log, squeezing at the bark angrily.

“I know you hate me. I just want you to know that the whole trying to eat you thing, it wasn’t personal, okay?” Gareth explained. “We needed to eat and you did destroy our home so it was the obvious choice.”

Jason glared at the monster before him, he refused to speak and simply spent the time grinding his teeth together angrily instead.

“But that’s all in the past, so I’m here to help you.” Gareth told him, trying to be sincere. “You should kill them before they kill you and use them for food. Make the most of the situation.”

“I’m not a cannibal like you.” Jason spat back in disgust.

“Yes you are.” Gareth retorted. “You just haven’t been pushed far enough.”

Jason watched as Gareth stood back up, taking another bite of the meat and chewing on it loudly. He walked around Jason in a small circle, relaxed and contemplative.

“And you will be.”

 

Rick and Carl continued searching for Jason, though their efforts had proven fruitless and it was quickly becoming apparent to Rick that he wasn’t within the walls. As they made their way down the street they encountered Daryl who was perched on the banister of a porch tending to his crossbow.

“Daryl, have you seen Jason?” Rick asked him bluntly.

“He ran past about twenty minutes ago.” Daryl replied, looking up from his crossbow. “Why?”

Rick’s face looked grim as he placed his hands on his hips. “We can’t find him.”

“Can you help us look?” Carl asked the archer, desperate to find his boyfriend.

Daryl stared back into Carl’s desperate eyes. The boy was much like a little brother to Daryl and he hated to see such an expression on his usually positive face. He nodded and hopped down from the porch banister, shouldering his crossbow.

Rick felt better having Daryl with him to search for Jason. If anyone in Alexandria was behind his disappearance then Daryl was added muscle for any fight. If Jason was outside the walls then his friend’s tracking skills would have him found quickly.

 

Jason leaned against a tree trunk, staring up at the leaf covered branches above him that led to a clear blue sky. After a fierce argument Gareth had disappeared, leaving him alone in the woods again. His chest was tight and painful while his head pounded painfully with every heartbeat.

“You can make this work, Jason.” A gruff voice sounded from in front of him.

Jason brought his gaze down to stare ahead. Inside he was surprised but he didn’t react to the person in front of him, he had accepted these visitations by this point. Boots, dark jeans, long sleeved purple shirt, beanie and a dark complexion. The large man who stood before him was easily recognisable.

“You can make it work without violence.” Tyreese told him. “No one has to get hurt. No one has to die.”

“You just don’t learn, do you?” Jason spat back. “Weren’t those cannibals proof enough?”

“This is different.” Tyreese argued. “These people are innocent, the worst thing they are is ignorant. Are you gonna kill them for that?”

“If they try to hurt Carl or separate me from him, yes.” Jason answered, stepping forward. “They need a wakeup call!”

“And what are you gonna teach them?” Tyreese replied calmly. “That you’re a killer or that they’re wrong?”

“What sort of question is that?” Jason growled, kicking a stone off into the distance.

“You need to talk to them. That’s what they’re used to.” Tyreese implored. “You need to do it their way. They’ll listen if you make the effort.”

“You have too much faith in people, Tyreese.” Jason shot back. “Most people drop their morals at the first sign of trouble.”

“I didn’t.” Tyreese answered. “You didn’t.”

“That’s where you’re wrong.” Jason replied with a shake of his head. “I did.”

Tyreese appeared to be silenced by this as he no longer answered. He simply stood and stared. Jason found it strange that he would simply stop talking, it wasn’t like him. It didn’t take long for him to hear more rustling and what sounded like faint rasps. Tyreese still wasn’t reacting.

“Look out!” A girl’s voice called out loudly.

Her voice rang in his ears as Tyreese vanished and reality returned to Jason. The rustling was very loud and was behind him. He spun round and came face to face with the rotting corpse of a walker, its mouth open and snarling as it tried to grab him. Jason jumped back but wasn’t fast enough to evade the walker. The hungry cadaver grabbed his shoulders and attempted to bite him but was prevented from doing so by Jason shoving his forearm against its throat.

Jason stumbled back against the tree, growling with effort as the walker snarled into his face. The stench was gut-wrenching and made him feel sick. Jason lifted his foot and placed it against the tree trunk, using it as purchase so he could push himself forward and force the walker to the ground. As soon as the walker hit the ground he scrambled to his feet and grabbed a large rock. The walker snarled from the ground and stretched out its arms in a final attempt to grab the teen before he slammed the rock into its forehead. The walker’s skull caved in from the force of the impact and allowed the rock to squash its brain into mush.

Jason stood up straight, his breaths coming out in short, and rapid pants as he tried to calm himself down. His hands and legs trembled as adrenaline continued to course through his system violently. He looked around and spotted the source of the warning between a couple large tree trunks. Enid. Jason grit his teeth and wondered just how much she had seen. She was becoming a problem.

Jason stopped his darker thoughts from taking hold. She had invaded his privacy and has seen more than she should have. She was the mysterious girl that would capture Carl’s attention, filling Jason with jealousy and she was also rather rude to people a lot of the time. Despite all of this, she had just saved his life and that was something he could not deny nor take away from her. He watched as she ran off and disappeared into the woods before making his own way back to Alexandria, conscious of how much time he had spent outside.

 

Rick, Carl and Daryl headed for the front gate. The plan was to head out into the woods and allow Daryl the opportunity to try and track Jason’s movements. If he was outside the walls, they would find him. If they couldn’t find him then Rick and Carol’s plan to take over the community would go into immediate effect.

“Jason!” Carl suddenly shouted, startling Rick from his thoughts.

The young teen ran down the street ahead of them to embrace the older teen who was making his way towards them. He looked damp from sweat but what caught the attention of Rick and Daryl were the specks of blood on his clothes. Jason chuckled lightly as he hugged Carl back just as tightly as Cal was hugging him.

“What’s this for?” Jason asked with a smile.

“I couldn’t find you.” Carl told him.

“None of us could.” Rick quickly added, eyes narrowed with suspicion.

“But you all know that I go for a run in the mornings.” Jason replied, trying to deflect any suspicion.

“You took a lot longer than normal.” Carl told him, disappointment lacing his tone over showering alone.

“I decided to do more laps, that’s all.” Jason answered with a nonchalant shrug of his shoulders.

“So how come we didn’t see you?” Rick asked, tilting his head to the side slightly.

Jason paused for a moment, staring back at the father of his boyfriend. “Must have been running circles round one another.”

Rick continued to stare, his expression was of clear disbelief. There was no way that they all somehow missed one another by going in circles. Alexandria wasn’t big enough for that. Daryl was also glaring at him but more so at the teen’s clothes.

“You got blood on you.” Daryl commented.

Jason looked down at the blood splatters on his shirt and nodded. “Yeah, I had a nose bleed earlier after I sneezed too hard. Must have popped a blood vessel.”

Rick and Daryl studied him for a moment. The sheriff inside Rick was telling him that the blood splatters weren’t consistent with a nose bleed but instead with a fight. Daryl was studying Jason’s nose for any signs of dried blood, of which there were none. He hadn’t had a nose bleed.

Taking advantage of their silence, Jason decided to escape the situation. “Anyway, I’m going to head back and get showered.”

When neither of the men said anything, he promptly made his way past them and started walking towards their house. Carl followed alongside silently, though he hadn’t said much he knew that something was wrong. He knew Jason wasn’t being honest but he couldn’t think of why he would have a reason to lie.

Rick and Daryl watched the two teenagers walk away from them. As they watched the two silently head home they shared a look at one another. Their eyes met and conveyed mutual sentiments and suspicions.

“That blood ain’t his.” Daryl broke the silence. “That was walker blood.”

Rick nodded, still watching them. “He was outside the walls.”

“Without any weapons.” Daryl observed.

Rick shared a look with Daryl. “Let’s keep an eye on him.”

Daryl nodded in agreement. With that, the two men separated with Daryl headed back to the porch and Rick continuing his patrol.

Once Jason and Carl were closer to the house and outside of anyone’s hearing range, Carl decided that the long silence between them was unacceptable.

“Why did you lie?” He asked Jason, not looking at him.

Jason sighed and glanced at Carl before facing ahead again. “I went outside to think for a while.”

“You know it’s dangerous out there.” Carl told him, facing him for a moment.

“If I recall, that fact didn’t stop you from chasing after Enid the other day.” Jason retorted with a smirk.

Carl looked away and let out a huff of defeat. He couldn’t argue with Jason on that point as it was completely true. He opened the door for them as they reached the house and stepped inside. Their house appeared to be abandoned for the time being with the whole group away working.

The sudden clang of a metal pan made them jump. Judith, who had been asleep in her crib erupted into a chorus of loud cries in response. Jason and Carl turned their attention to the kitchen where they found Carol picking the pan up off the floor, the highest cupboard door hanging open a couple feet above her head. It was easy to work out what had happened.

Carl instinctively headed over to the crib and lifted his little sister out of it, cradling her in his arms and trying his best to calm her down. Her wails echoed around them. Jason smiled warmly as he watched Carl go into his big brother mode. It was always as adorable as the first time he had witnessed it.

“I just got her to sleep as well.” Carol commented from the kitchen.

“These things happen.” Jason replied with a smile.

“And if that’s blood on your clothes you can wash them yourself.” Carol added with a motherly tone.

Jason laughed lightly. “Which I obviously will.”

Judith refused to stop crying, forcing Carl to sit on the couch with her as he continued his attempt at lulling her to sleep. Jason briefly caught his attention to tell him that he was going upstairs to shower. After Carl’s nod of acknowledgement, Jason disappeared upstairs leaving Carl to take care of Judith and Carol to prepare that night’s dinner.

 

Twenty minutes later and Jason had finished showering. His hair was dry and was set in place the way he preferred it. He walked out the steamed up bathroom wearing only his boots and dark blue slim jeans. His long sleeved black shirt, short sleeved grey shirt and leather jacket were all laid out on the bed. He sat down on the bed and opened the bedside drawer, pulling out his diary to mark his tallies.

Despite things having improved so much now that they were in Alexandria, Jason continued to mark down how many days it had been since Kellin’s death and how many days it had been since he had met Carl. Once he had marked down the tallies, he flicked through the diary until he found the page that contained Kellin’s picture.

The picture had been taken by one of their mutual friends, Harry. Kellin looked stunning as always with his blonde hair combed up and back, his slim body covered by a blue hoodie. Jason’s hair was a little shorter than it was after his haircut from Jessie while his own body was covered by a blank tank top and black leather jacket. They had their arms around each other and wore the biggest, happiest grins on their faces.

Jason remembered that day fondly. He and his friends, Sam, Ryan and Harry had formed a band and were going to perform in a club that night. The club that agreed to host them was the same one he had met Kellin in several months before. Those were the happiest times of his life, rocking in a band with friends, working with animals and spending time with the most gorgeous boy he had ever met.

As much as he tried not to think about it, he would often wonder if Ryan and Harry were still alive. He had lost them early into the apocalypse. When everything had started he had went looking for them but their houses had been abandoned, he never saw them alive or dead. Jason had found Sam in a camp several weeks into the apocalypse and had been there to witness his tragic but heroic death. He hoped Ryan and Harry were still out there somewhere, alive and that maybe fate would be kind enough to reunite them.

He looked at the photo of him and Kellin again. He was well aware that his visions in the woods were merely hallucinations but they were too powerful to ignore. Jason knew he had enough willpower to block them out from time to time but if he was to understand himself he had to indulge in them. Despite that, he knew the others wouldn’t be pleased about him chasing ghosts in the woods.

Counting the tallies in his head and remembering the good times of his past before the apocalypse made Jason realise something. If his mental calculations were correct, it would have been the third anniversary of his relationship with Kellin. That fact rang in his mind making his head pound painfully. His chest tightened up in heart ache as tears started to fall from his eyes. Jason put his diary down on the bed and leaned forward to place his head in his hands as he started crying, his body shaking violently with every breath. He was trying his best to cry quietly so neither Carl nor Carol heard him.

 

_The soft strumming of a guitar floated through the air of the restaurant. Framed monochrome photos lined the brick layered walls, depicting the history of the town and the family who owned it. The restaurant was small and was illuminated by small lights that sat on several small chandeliers which hung from the ceiling. In a similar fashion to the exterior, the name of the restaurant was written above the wine bar: Romero’s._

_Romero’s was a small Italian restaurant that was hidden up a side street in the centre of town. It was one of Jason’s favourite places to go for a meal and it had been the perfect place to take Kellin to celebrate their first anniversary. It was quiet in the restaurant with only one other couple dining there that night, allowing Jason and Kellin relative privacy._

_Jason couldn’t believe they had already been boyfriends for a whole year, twelve whole months, three hundred and sixty five days. Yet, there they were, sat across from one another at one of the small mahogany tables, the flame of a candle dancing between them. Jason had a plate of Italian meatballs and spaghetti covered with a rich tomato sauce while Kellin had an exquisite vegetarian lasagne. The food had been made from scratch right there in the restaurant and it was absolutely delicious._

_They ate in silence, occasionally stealing glances at one another and when their eyes would meet they would giggle gently at one another. It was perfectly romantic and Jason had plans for when they got home. He was going to make the sweetest love he could to the blonde beauty before him. It was in that moment that Jason made a decision. If they could last another year as amazingly and easily as they had the one they were celebrating, then he would make the ultimate commitment to Kellin. Romero’s small Italian restaurant would make a perfect place to propose._

A knock on the door brought Jason out of his thoughts, the memory fading into the back of his mind as he wiped his eyes before looking up at the closed bedroom door.

“Who is it?” He asked gruffly, trying to hide the grief in his voice.

“It’s me.” Carl’s voice sounded from the other side. “Can I come in?”

“It’s your room too, you don’t need to ask.” Jason replied.

Carl opened the door and walked into the bedroom, closing the door behind him. He stood in front of the door and stared at Jason, instantly noticing the redness around his eyes that revealed he had been crying. Instinctively, Carl closed the gap between them and wrapped his arms around Jason’s neck, pulling him into a tight hug. Jason gently returned the hug, rubbing Carl’s back as he fought not to cry again in response to Carl’s affection.

“What’s wrong?” Carl asked, pulling away from the hug to sit next to Jason on the bed.

Jason sighed, knowing he couldn’t hide anything from Carl. “Today would have been my third anniversary with Kellin.”

Carl remained silent, unsure of what to say and instead maintained his gaze on the older teen.

“Two years ago we celebrated our first year together in a nice little Italian restaurant.” Jason explained. “That night, we made love for hours.”

Carl continued to listen, feelings of inferiority creeping in with how Jason changed when he spoke about Kellin. His eyes would sparkle with love and adoration and his voice would be smooth like honey. Carl loved Jason but he knew he wasn’t so in love with him yet as Jason had obviously been with Kellin.

“I had also decided that night that we would go to the same restaurant for our second anniversary.” Jason explained. “My plan was to propose. I wanted to marry him and be with him forever but the world had to fucking end, didn’t it?”

Carl winced at the icy tone of Jason’s voice. It reflected just how angry and hurt Jason was at the world. The walkers had appeared and destroyed the happily ever after he had expected to have. A year or so after that the world had then taken the most precious thing in his life away. It pained Carl to see Jason in so much emotional agony.

“I still love him. I still wake up expecting for him to be there. I think that’s the tricky part about it all.” Jason mused, though it was unclear if it was to himself or to Carl. “I don’t think you ever stop loving someone, no matter what happens. I think there’s always that little part of you that can never move on, regardless of how much you may want to.”

Carl averted his gaze from Jason and stared at the floor. Even though Kellin was dead it felt like he was competing against him for Jason’s heart. Carl knew fine well that he would never win such a competition and it made him question why Jason had agreed to their relationship in the first place.

Jason noticed Carl looking away and finally turned to look at him. He placed a hand on the younger teen’s shoulder while the other reached forward to gently grasp Carl’s face. Jason pulled Carl’s face to the side so that they were staring at one another again.

“I know what you’re thinking. I can see the doubt and the confusion that’s lacing your mind.” Jason spoke softly, a familiar sparkle in his eyes. “But you don’t need to worry, Carl. I love you, I really do. My love for Kellin doesn’t lessen my love for you in any way, I promise.”

Carl tried to smile but he found it difficult. He wasn’t sure if he could trust that Jason was telling him the truth and that he wasn’t simply trying to make him feel better. He knew the older teen had lied about going into the woods so dishonesty wasn’t beneath him. His heart started to beat a little faster when he noticed that Jason was smiling at him, a gentle, serene smile that complimented the loving sparkle in his blue eyes.

“I was alone, didn’t have anyone. No reason to live until you came along.” Jason began to sing gently, staring into Carl’s eyes. “You showed me the way, you opened up my eyes to finally see a void I had inside.”

Carl found himself starting to smile as Jason’s smooth singing rang softly in his ears.

“I won’t let you down ‘cause you’re the reason.” Jason continued singing, a little stronger as it was the chorus. “I’d do anything, you’re worth fighting for, worth fighting for.”

Jason slipped his hand from Carl’s shoulder and found the younger’s right hand, which he took in his larger left hand.

“Who can you count on in the end? To take control and help you realise.” Jason sang softly, smiling back at Carl. “No holding back, no holding onto the lies. The scales are falling and now is our time.”

Jason sang stronger at the end of the line before opening up into the chorus again, stronger than the previous time.

“I won’t let you down ‘cause you’re the reason.” He powered out. “I’d do anything, you’re worth fighting for, worth fighting for your love.”

Jason squeezed Carl’s hand as he sang louder and stronger, trying to sound as sincere and honest as possible with the lyrics.

“I will protect, fight off your demons. I’d do anything, you’re worth fighting for, worth fighting for your love.” Jason sang loudly. “This is my time, I’m not waiting anymore. No holding back, you’re what I’m looking for!”

Jason squeezed Carl’s hand tighter and stroked his cheek as he continued to sing his heart out to the younger boy beside him.

“I’ve waited a life time baby, I know you’re counting on me.” His eyes sparkled as he sang. “I won’t let you down, I’d die for love.”

Jason took a moment to kiss Carl quickly, catching the boy off-guard before resuming his softer singing.

“I won’t let you down ‘cause you’re the reason.” Jason sang softly. “I’d do anything, you’re worth fighting for, worth fighting for your love.”

Carl grinned back at Jason, matching the grin on the older teen’s own face.

“I will protect, fight off your demons. I’d do anything, you’re worth fighting for, worth fighting for your love.” Jason sang loudly and sincerely. “Worth fighting for your love.”

Jason held the note on the word love, showing off a little to Carl that when he wanted to he really could sing.

“Let’s get the hell outta town, I won’t let you down.” Jason finished the song.

As soon as Jason squeezed Carl’s hand one more time, the younger teen immediately closed the gap between them and captured Jason’s lips in a searing kiss. Carl forced his tongue inside Jason’s mouth as they wrapped their arms around each other, trying to pull the other as close to them as possible as their tongues continued their heated battle.

Jason’s sincere confession had removed all doubt from Carl’s mind. Jason was his and only his. Although Jason still loved Kellin, the ghost of his dead boyfriend would not get in the way of his relationship with Carl. Carl had never felt so loved and valued before and he chose to show that to Jason by kissing him as hard as he could.

Jason moaned softly into the kiss, feeling relief wash over him. Letting Carl in to his more private thoughts had removed a stressful weight from his shoulders. He felt his guilt dissolve, allowing him to enjoy their heated and loving embrace. He had picked the song carefully because Carl really was his reason to live. He kissed Carl back as hard as he could so that the younger teen knew how important he was.

 

“He’s hiding something.” Rick commented, hands on his hips.

He and Michonne stood next to one of the perimeter walls, staying out of sight of most of the residents of Alexandria. After Jason had returned to the house with Carl they had met up to discuss what was happening with the teen.

“He’s been acting strange since Deanna’s party.” Michonne commented, remembering Jason staring across the street the night before.

“Whatever is going on, it better not hurt Carl.” Rick thought aloud, staring in the direction of the house.

Michonne raised a hand and stepped away from Rick. “He wouldn’t hurt Carl but I’ll talk to him just to be sure.”

“Do you think he’ll talk to you?” Rick questioned the samurai’s decision.

“Do you think he’ll talk to you about it?” Michonne answered with her own question.

Rick sighed and titled his head with a smirk. She had a point. With that, Michonne walked off in the direction of the house while Rick resumed his patrol of the community.

 

After their passionate kisses had come to an end, Jason and Carl lay back on their bed spooning with Carl on top of Jason. They held each other’s hands and were content just listening to each other breathe while enjoying the company. It was surprisingly peaceful.

“So, what do you want to do today?” Jason asked Carl, practically whispering in his ear.

“We could go to Ron’s.” Carl suggested. “Play some videogames?”

Jason grit his teeth at the suggestion. Enid would most likely be there and he wasn’t sure if he was ready to face her after she had witnessed his morning episode. There was also a chance that she would use it to take Carl away from him. He wouldn’t let that happen. He still had the gun in the inside pocket of his jacket.

“Okay, we can do that.” Jason answered with a gentle smile. “Let me get the rest of my clothes on.”

Carl got up off of Jason and allowed his boyfriend to pull on his long sleeved black shirt, followed by his short sleeved grey shirt and then finally his leather jacket. The older teen smiled at Carl before they both made their way out, heading out the door, down the stairs and through the house to the front door.

As soon as they opened the front door they were greeted with the brown windbreaker and black dreadlocks of Michonne, who stood in the doorway. Carl smiled as he greeted his female friend.

“Hey Michonne.” He greeted happily.

“Hey Carl.” Michonne answered with a smile. “Where you boys off to?”

“Ron’s. Going to hang out and play videogames.” Carl replied, grinning. They could never forget the horrors that resided outside the walls but it was about time they were able to enjoy themselves.

Michonne beamed back a white smile before casting her gaze to Jason. “Do you mind if I talk to Jason before you go?”

Carl seemed confused at the request before his memory of the morning returned. He knew that it would be about Jason’s disappearance and by the stern look on his boyfriend’s face, Jason knew that too.

“You go on ahead, I’ll meet you there.” Jason told Carl with a gentle smile, masking his irritation.

Carl nodded and walked out onto the porch when Michonne stepped aside for him. He made his way onto the street and began the trek along to Ron’s house. Jason closed the front door behind him and leaned back against it with his arms folded.

“I take it this is about this morning.” Jason commented with a glare.

“What were you doing outside the walls?” Michonne questioned.

“Didn’t know I needed permission.” Jason snorted, looking away from her.

“Carl was worried about you.” Michonne told him sternly.

“He didn’t need to be.” Jason retorted, returning his eyes to the samurai. “I’m fine.”

“But he was.” Michonne argued. “We all were.”

“Like I said, I’m fine.” Jason defended himself.

Michonne stared into his eyes, narrowing her own and making Jason uncomfortable. The samurai was impressively perceptive and he wasn’t in the mood to start telling her the truth.

“We’re all in this together.” Michonne softened her tone. “You don’t have to bottle anything up anymore. You can talk to us.”

“I know that.” Jason sighed in defeat. “But I’m not quite ready.”

“When you are ready, you should talk to Carl first.” Michonne instructed.

Jason softened his expression and nodded, standing up to his full height as he walked across the porch. He had every intention of telling Carl what was going on but he still needed more time to work it out in his own mind. It wasn’t about the visions or who he saw. It was about what they meant and why he was seeing them again.

“Jason.” Michonne called after him as he walked down the stairs.

Jason turned back around to look up at her.

“I used to talk to my dead boyfriend.” Michonne revealed with a small smile.

Jason lowered his head and nodded. She knew what was happening to him but out of respect she wasn’t going to tell the others. He respected the samurai for that quality. It was the same with his relationship with Carl. She let him and Carl reveal it even though she could have done so at any time. He raised his head one last time to smile back at her before he made his way along the street.

 

When Carl arrived at Ron’s place, Jessie directed him straight up the stairs to Ron’s room. In the room, Carl found Ron and Enid lying back on the bed together with no sign of Mikey.

“Hey Carl.” Ron greeted, sitting up and smiling.

“Hey.” Carl greeted with a matching smile.

Enid sat up but didn’t say anything at first. She studied the scene before her with her usual unreadable expression that always sent shivers down Carl’s spine. Eventually, she spoke up.

“Where’s Jason?” She asked. “Isn’t he always with you?”

Carl thought for a moment. He took an instant disliking to her tone, as if his boyfriend wasn’t allowed to be by his side all the time. He had to remind himself neither of them knew that he and Jason were together but that didn’t matter.

“He’ll be here soon.” Carl explained calmly. “Michonne wanted to talk to him.”

“Michonne?” Ron questioned. “That the black woman with the dreadlocks?”

Carl nodded. “That’s her.”

“He didn’t get in another fight again, did he?” Ron asked. “I mean, she is one of the constables.”

Carl narrowed his eyes slightly, annoyed that Ron would make than assumption about Jason. “No, he didn’t. She just wanted to talk to him.”

“Carl, I know it’s none of my business but I think you should stay away from Jason for a while.” Enid commented, her expression still void of emotion.

Carl practically reeled back in response. “Why?”

“I saw him in the woods this morning and he was hallucinating.” Enid explained, trying to sound sincere. “He’s going crazy and he might be dangerous.”

Carl fell silent in shock. Enid had just revealed to him what he had been wondering about all day. Jason hadn’t told him what had happened in the woods because he had been hallucinating, just like his father did at the prison after Lori’s death. That made him unpredictable.

“I just think you should keep your distance.” Enid continued. “He might not be safe to be around.”

“I could ask my Dad to take a look at him.” Ron added, trying to be supportive.

Carl violently shook his head. He wasn’t going to stay away from his boyfriend, no one would make him do that. He would talk to Jason, he would help him work things out. Carl refused to run away from him like a little kid in his time of need.

“Stop it!” He barked back at them. “He would never hurt me!”

“How do you know for sure?” Ron asked, uncertain.

Carl grit his teeth in frustration. Jason loved him. “I know him.”

“You didn’t know he was hallucinating.” Enid remarked.

Carl glared back at her. “He’s my friend, I’ll deal with it.”

Enid and Ron could tell that Carl was losing patience with them and decided to back off. There was no need for the three of them to start fighting over Jason, especially considering the teen in question would be joining them soon.

 

Jason knocked on the front door of Ron’s house. He heard approaching footsteps and expected Ron or Jessie to answer the door but when the door swung open he was surprised. In the doorway stood the tall and rather imposing figure of Ron’s father, Pete. He smiled down at Jason’s shorter form.

“Ah, you’re Jason, right? Carl’s friend?” Pete questioned, uncertain.

Jason nodded and offered his hand out for Pete to shake. “And you must be Ron’s father.”

Pete shook his hand and stepped out onto the porch with him. “Before you join the boys, how about we swing by my office so I can give you a check-up?”

Jason thought for a moment. He wasn’t in the mood for a doctor’s appointment. “They’re going to be wondering where I’ve gotten to, maybe later?”

Pete placed his large hand on Jason’s back and gently pushed him to walk away from the house. “It won’t take long, I promise.”

Jason sighed and allowed Pete to guide him further down the street, away from the house and into the infirmary. The infirmary itself was one of the other houses in the community but the living room, dining room and kitchen had all been converted into an infirmary. Cabinets of medicine and textbooks stood against the walls, a bed sat in the middle of the room with a couple small machines and other equipment next to it.

Pete guided Jason over to the bed and gestured for him to sit down, which the older teen did without question. Jason didn’t want to be in the infirmary with Pete, he wanted to be with Carl, especially after his discussion with Michonne. He took off his leather jacket as he was told and unbuttoned his grey shirt.

Pete grabbed a small folder and opened it up, writing on one of the pages with a pen he had lifted from the desk that sat across from the foot of the bed. He wrote down Jason’s name before sitting across from him on the leather chair that was kept by the bedside.

“So, Jason, do you mind telling me your last name, your date of birth, and any allergies you have?” Pete asked him, smiling softly with a professional air about him.

Jason closed his eyes and sighed before finally answering. “Clarke, sixth of March nineteen ninety three, and Penicillin.”

Pete quickly noted down his answers on the sheet of paper before looking back up. “Have you had any surgery?”

Jason couldn’t recall ever needing surgery. He was about to deny ever having had surgery until he remembered the night he had been stabbed. He had awoken in a hospital run by Bill who had stitched him back up.

“I got stabbed a few months ago, woke up in a hospital.” Jason explained. “They must have done more than just stitch me up.”

Pete nodded, noting down the information and making a personal note to check that later on.

“Let’s discuss your general health.” Pete continued. “Do you smoke, drink alcohol or do any kind of drugs? Now or in the past?”

Jason shook his head. “I’ve never smoked, drank alcohol or done drugs.”

“Never?” Pete replied, sounding surprised.

“Apart from the odd glass of wine or sangria at a family get together, never.” Jason replied with a shrug.

Pete nodded and pulled out a small torch from his pocket. He shined it into Jason’s eyes, checking how his pupils dilated while also checking for discolouration. He then instructed Jason to lift his black top so that he could listen to his heart beat and his airways. Eventually, Pete stopped and noted down his findings. Jason appeared to be perfectly healthy given the circumstances.

Pete then pulled out a set of scales and instructed Jason to stand on them so that he could measure his weight. Throughout the whole medical check-up, Jason felt uneasy around Pete but he couldn’t explain to himself why that was. After the scales, he was instructed to stand against the wall while Pete measured his height before noting it down.

“One hundred and seventy two centimetres and one hundred and twenty five pounds.” Pete commented as he wrote the information down. “A little underweight but not surprising since you’ve been out there for so long.”

As Pete spoke, Jason detected the reason for his uneasiness. It wasn’t just the dark nature of the tall doctor’s eyes but the smell of alcohol on his breath. These two things brought back memories of his uncle to Jason, the violent alcoholic that almost wrecked his life. Jason suddenly had a strong desire to leave.

“Well, I’d say you’re all clear.” Pete commented, smiling as Jason pulled his jacket back on. “Come by again in a couple months just to be on the safe side.”

“Will do.” Jason told him as he made his way to the door. He had no intention of ever being alone with the man again.

 

“He’s going through some things.” Michonne told Rick, back at their meeting point by the wall. “He says he’s not ready to talk about it.”

“We can’t have him wandering around outside the walls.” Rick commented, thinking about Jason’s safety along with that of the community.

“Give him time.” Michonne argued. “He’s been like this for less than twelve hours.”

Rick glanced in the direction of Ron’s house, watching Jason cross the street from the infirmary before entering the family’s home. He narrowed his eyes in thought. He didn’t like members of the group having secrets, especially potentially dangerous secrets like Jason was trying to conceal.

As if reading his mind, Michonne spoke again. “You lost it for a while at the prison. Give Jason time.”

“We need to watch him.” Rick commented in thought before staring back at Michonne.

The samurai nodded in agreement. Having someone keep an eye on Jason was the wisest decision, that way he would have space but still be safe.

“I’ll ask Daryl to do it.” Rick continued. “He might not notice if it’s Daryl.”

Michonne nodded again. It was a wise move by Rick because Jason knew that she and Rick were suspicious of what was going on and would be looking out for them. Daryl usually kept to himself and would be able to watch Jason without drawing attention to himself.

 

After the awkwardness of his encounter with Pete, Jason was finally sat in Ron’s room in front of the television. The three boys were playing one of his many games while Enid sat on the bed reading one of her books. The game that Jason, Carl and Ron were taking turns on was a fighting game, Super Street Fighter IV: Arcade Edition. Ron had explained that Aiden had stumbled upon the game during a supply run recently and had brought it back for him.

Jason smirked and cracked his knuckles. “This might be rather one-sided.”

Ron and Carl gave him questioning looks before the older teen continued to explain.

“I played this game with some friends before everything happened.” Jason explained. “So you’re going to struggle, I promise.”

The younger boys accepted the challenge posed by Jason’s gaming experience. However, as the matches went by it was clear he hadn’t been lying. Carl and Ron had been evenly matched at the start until Jason started whispering advice to Carl on how to play. Carl inevitably ended up sitting far closer to Jason than normal, both in order to hear his whispered advice and also to protect him from the judgement of Ron and Enid.

This sudden closeness did not go unnoticed by Ron. After Jason won his round against Ron with Zangief’s pile driver, the younger teen put the controller down and turned to the pair beside him. Jason studied his gaze before the boy spoke up.

“You know, the other day Mikey told me something.” Ron began. “I just wanna know if it’s true or not, okay?”

Jason and Carl nodded almost in synch with one another.

“Are you guys, like, together?” Ron asked, hesitation lining his tone. “Cause Mikey says you are.”

Carl’s face immediately flared up with colour, forcing him to avert his gaze to the floor as he fell silent. He didn’t know whether or not to admit to their relationship after Jason’s fight the previous day. Carl didn’t want to lose Ron as a friend over something as simple as their relationship.

“Yes, we are.” Jason answered confidently. “Problem?”

Under the intensity of Jason’s gaze, Ron lifted his hands up and shook his head.

“No, no. I don’t care, dude.” Ron quickly blurted out in defence.

“Good.” Jason affirmed.

Carl shot his gaze up from the floor to Jason’s face. He was surprised by how confidently and calmly Jason had admitted to their relationship. What had really made Carl’s heart swell was the proud tone in Jason’s voice, there was no hesitation in it, just sheer pride and confidence.

“That stuff doesn’t even matter anymore.” Enid commented dryly.

Jason glared at her as a warning to not mention his hallucinations. She met his glare and softened her gaze, playing possum as she knew the older teen was unaware of the conversation she and Ron had already had with Carl. Seeing her back down was enough for Jason to relax and turn back to the game.

“Now then, who wants to be the first victim of my Oni?” Jason asked with a playful grin.

 

A couple hours later Jason and Carl were heading back home, hand in hand. Jason had renewed confidence since Ron’s questioning on their relationship and didn’t feel like hiding it anymore. He hated anyone who had an issue with his love for Carl and showing public affection would help draw them out.

The two lovers would have stayed longer at Ron’s place but when Pete had returned from the infirmary he was in no mood for guests. He had demanded that his family have their dinner together without anyone else, so Jason, Carl and Enid had honoured those demands.

Jason knew that as time went on he would have to tell Carl about his hallucinations. So long as he was with Carl he didn’t seem to get them. It was like Carl was his anchor to reality. Michonne’s concerns were valid but he wasn’t sure how Carl would react to having a lunatic for a boyfriend. Would Carl take it in his stride or would he distance himself in the interest of safety? Jason wasn’t sure what the answer to that was and it sent a nervous shiver through him.

Carl knew he would have to talk to Jason about what Enid had told him. He wasn’t comfortable with Jason keeping it a secret from him but he hoped it was because he needed time. Carl trusted his gut instincts that Jason wasn’t a threat, no matter how bad his hallucinations were supposed to be or how careless he was supposedly being. Jason had never hurt Carl and had always been there to protect him. His body language was always that of a guardian, always on the lookout, always vigilant and ready. Carl trusted him as much as he trusted his father, Rick. Jason wouldn’t hurt him and would explain things to him if he asked. He was sure of it.

As they walked a white van rolled up the road from the front gate. The doors opened as Glenn, Aiden, Nicholas, Noah and Tara all got out. They had all just been out on a supply run and had just returned. As soon as Nicholas stepped out of the van he glared as his eyes met with Jason’s. As everyone present except for Aiden were on Jason’s side, the curly haired man remained silent.

“Hey guys!” Glenn greeted as he walked round to the back of the van.

“Get anything interesting?” Jason asked him out of curiosity, smiling.

“Mostly canned food.” Glenn replied, handing some cans to Tara. “But we did find one good thing.”

“What was it?” Carl asked, stepping forward.

Glenn grinned as he reached into the back of the van and pulled out a guitar. He stepped forward and handed it to Jason, whose hand was already outstretched for it.

“Can you play it?” Carl asked. “You know, to go along with your singing?”

Jason grinned as he checked to see if the guitar was tuned. “I sure can.”

“Awesome!” Carl responded excitedly.

“After dinner, I’ll give you a VIP performance from the last member of The White Tigers.” Jason told his younger lover with a grin, strumming the guitar to check if he had tuned it correctly.

“The White Tigers?” Glenn repeated curiously.

Jason nodded. “Before all this, I was in a band with some friends and that’s what we called ourselves.”

“I’m sorry they didn’t make it.” Glenn consoled him with a pat of his shoulder.

Jason lowered his gaze and nodded. “I don’t know if they did or didn’t.”

“You don’t?” Carl questioned.

“Well, Sam, our drummer, he died early on. He was with me and Kellin.” Jason explained, closing his eyes momentarily. “I never found Ryan and Harry though. I like to believe that they’re still out there somewhere.”

“They could be.” Glenn suggested optimistically. “You survived, so maybe they did too.”

“Maybe.” Jason repeated doubtfully.

 

True to his word, after having eaten dinner that night, Jason was sat on a chair out on the front porch of the house. Carl sat on the floor of the porch with his legs crossed while Rick stood by the front door, cradling Judith in his arms. Michonne stood nearby, watching Jason and admiring the connection between him and Carl.

Jason started strumming the guitar strings, starting the tune to a relatively slow song if the rift was anything to go by. His gaze remained on the guitar as he concentrated on his playing, it had been almost two years since he had last touched a guitar.

“You never know when you're gonna meet someone and your whole wide world in a moment comes undone.” Jason sang softly. “You're just walking around and suddenly everything that you thought that you knew about love is gone.”

Jason glanced up and met Carl’s eyes, smirking as he saw the realisation in Carl’s face that the first song was dedicated to him.

“You find out it's all been wrong.” Jason sang slowly, his strums soft on the guitar strings. “And all my scars don't seem to matter anymore.”

Jason stopped strumming the guitar and stared directly into Carl’s eyes. “Cause they led me here to you.”

Jason resumed his playing, strumming the guitar strongly to play it loudly.

“I know that it’s gonna take some time.” Jason sang loudly. “I've got to admit that the thought has crossed my mind.”

Jason smiled at Carl. “This might end up like it should.”

Carl smiled back, his heart swelling from the performance.

“And I'm gonna say what I need to say.” Jason continued to sing loudly. “And hope to god that it don't scare you away.”

Jason’s eyes scanned around him and stopped on Michonne. “Don’t wanna be misunderstood.”

He returned his gaze to Carl as the chorus ended. “But I'm starting to believe that this could be the start of something good.”

Jason stopped singing and played the guitar for a few moments, looking around as a small crowd was starting to form, mostly from their group.

“Everyone knows life has its ups and downs.” Jason sang, glancing over to Rick. “One day you're on top of the world and one day you're the clown.”

Jason watched as most of the group slowly poured themselves onto the porch.

“Well I've been both enough to know that you don't wanna get in the way when it’s working out.” Jason sang before meeting Carl’s eyes again and smiling. “The way that it is right now.”

Carl smiled back. For the time being, his thoughts were on how talented Jason was and not on the negativity of his secrets or hallucinations.

“You see my heart, I wear it on my sleeve.” Jason continued singing. “Cause I just can't hide it anymore.”

As he reached the chorus, he increased the strength of his strokes on the guitar so that it played as loudly as possible.

“I know that it’s gonna take some time.” Jason sang loudly. “I've got to admit that the thought has crossed my mind.”

Jason gazed into Carl’s eyes. “This might end up like it should.”

“And I'm gonna say what I need to say.” Jason continued to sing loudly. “And hope to god that it don't scare you away.”

Jason’s eyes scanned around him to observe the faces of the growing crowd. “Don’t wanna be misunderstood.”

He returned his gaze to Carl. “But I'm starting to believe that this could be the start.”

Jason didn’t end in the chorus and continued to strum loudly, bridging into another verse immediately.

“Cause I don't know where it's going, there's a part of me that loves not knowing.” Jason sang lowly and deeply. “Just don't let it end before we begin.”

Jason stopped playing the guitar and stared adoringly at Carl.

“You never know when you're gonna meet someone.” He sang softly and quietly. “And your whole wide world in a moment comes undone.”

His hands erupted into action yet again as he exploded into the chorus.

“I know that it’s gonna take some time.” Jason sang loudly. “I've got to admit that the thought has crossed my mind.”

Jason grinned at Carl. “This might end up like it should.”

“And I'm gonna say what I need to say.” Jason continued to sing loudly. “And hope to god that it don't scare you away.”

Jason’s looked at Rick. “Don’t wanna be misunderstood.”

He looked at the small crowd as he played and sang as strongly as he could. “But I’m starting to believe, oh, I'm starting to believe that this could be the start of something good.”

Jason continued to play the guitar, winding the tune down gradually.

“The start of something good.” Jason concluded the song, staring into Carl’s eyes as he strummed the final note.

A round of applause loudly followed, the loudest claps belonging to Carl who stood up. Without thinking about the small crowd, which was now a mix between the group and some Alexandria residents, Carl jumped forward and pulled Jason into a grateful hug. Jason hugged back with one arm while his other hand held onto the guitar.

“That was amazing!” Carl exclaimed, still hugging him.

“Would have loved to hear your full band perform.” Michonne commented with a grin.

Jason grinned back and noticed several of the faces in the crowd. The Alexandria residents didn’t look very comfortable with the embrace he shared with Carl or the fact that he had sang him a love song. The few faces that didn’t seem to mind were Deanna, Aaron and Eric.

Once Carl released Jason so he could sit back down in front of him on the porch, Jason decided on his next song. He scanned the faces of the crowd and strummed a few chords before staring at the less comfortable faces, one of them being Gabriel.

“I know that some of you are still stuck in the past.” Jason spoke to them loudly. “You tolerate Aaron and Eric, yet you find Carl and myself difficult.”

Rick and the others weren’t sure where Jason was going with his point. They made sure they were alert and ready in case another fight broke out. Deanna remained calm, her interview with Jason being enough for her to be able to read him and predict what he was going to do.

“So this song is for those who doubt us.” Jason stated, glancing at Carl upon the word us. “And for those who would rather see us pulled apart from one another.”

Jason lowered his gaze and cleared his throat before he began strumming softly.

“My lover's got humour, she's the giggle at a funeral.” Jason sang with a deeper voice than before. “Knows everybody's disapproval, I should've worshipped her sooner.”

Everyone remained silent as they listened to the lyrics, his soft strumming and deeper voice already telling them that the words were more important than the music.

“If the heavens ever did speak, she's the last true mouthpiece.” Jason continued, his eyes closed. “Every Sunday's getting more bleak, a fresh poison each week.”

Jason opened his eyes to stare at Gabriel as he sang. “"We were born sick," you heard them say it.”

Jason glared before turning his eyes back to the guitar as he strummed a little louder.

“My church offers no absolutes, she tells me, "Worship in the bedroom.".” Jason sang, his eyes opening to stare at Carl. “The only heaven I'll be sent to is when I'm alone with you.”

Jason’s eyes scanned the crowd, pausing on the individuals who were least comfortable with him and his sexuality.

“I was born sick but I love it.” Jason sang, stopping his guitar playing momentarily. “Command me to be well. Aaay. Amen. Amen. Amen.”

Jason snapped his eyes open and his head up as he strummed much louder as he hit the chorus. There were angry undertones to his singing voice.

“Take me to church!” Jason sang loudly, glaring at Gabriel.

As he sang, his mind flooded with the memories of the many homophobes that had given him and Kellin grief in the past.

“I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies, I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife!” Jason sang loudly and angrily. “Offer me that deathless death, Good God, let me give you my life!”

“Take me to church!” Jason repeated.

One thing this song always did for Jason was bring out his deep seeded hatred of religion and its constant condemnation of those who didn’t follow it.

“I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies, I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife!” Jason sang loudly and angrily. “Offer me that deathless death, Good God, let me give you my life!”

Jason relaxed as he came out of the chorus, strumming softer and lowering his voice back to what it had been at the start of the song.

“If I'm a pagan of the good times, my lover's the sunlight.” Jason sang, his eyes closed. “To keep the Goddess on my side, she demands a sacrifice.”

Jason opened his eyes to stare at several of the residents.

“Drain the whole sea. Get something shiny. Something meaty for the main course.” Jason sang a little louder, glaring at Gabriel and Nicholas. “That's a fine-looking high horse, what you got in the stable? We've a lot of starving faithful.”

He took a silent pleasure in how Gabriel seemed to squirm on the spot under the intensity of his angry glare.

“That looks tasty. That looks plenty.” Jason sang, preparing for the chorus again. “This is hungry work.”

“Take me to church!” Jason sang loudly, his guitar as loud as his voice.

He remembered the hatred Kellin had received from his family, how he had been kicked out of his own home simply for revealing his true self.

“I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies, I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife!” Jason sang loudly and angrily. “Offer me that deathless death, Good God, let me give you my life!”

“Take me to church!” Jason repeated angrily.

Jason would never forget that disgusting personality of Kellin’s father. The man who Jason had found it impossible not to attack for being such a hateful man.

“I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies, I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife!” Jason repeated loudly. “Offer me that deathless death, Good God, let me give you my life!”

Jason relaxed his playing and voice as he ended the chorus and began the next verse.

“No Masters or Kings, when the Ritual begins.” Jason sang slowly, his eyes following the crowd before stopping on Carl again. “There is no sweeter innocence than our gentle sin.”

Jason raised his eyes to lock them with those of Aaron and Eric, the only people who could truly relate to the song.

“In the madness and soil of that sad earthly scene.” Jason sang. “Only then I am human, only then I am clean.”

Jason stopped playing the guitar, closed his eyes and pushed his voice to its limits. “Ooh oh. Amen. Amen. Amen!”

Jason’s eyes opened as he exploded back into the chorus. “Take me to church!”

Jason reflected on the homophobic gang who had been beating Kellin into the ground. He remembered losing control and the great satisfaction he felt when he nearly killed them during his violent outburst.

“I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies, I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife!” Jason sang loudly and angrily. “Offer me that deathless death, Good God, let me give you my life!”

“Take me to church!” Jason repeated angrily.

Jason vowed to never allow Gabriel, Nicholas, Kevin or anyone else get in the way of his relationship with Carl. Love wasn’t wrong and it was the one thing that the world always needed a little more of. He would never stop loving Carl at the request of a bigot.

“I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies, I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife!” Jason repeated loudly. “Offer me that deathless death, Good God, let me give you my life!”

Jason continued playing the guitar as he gradually closed off the song, his strums becoming slower and quieter until he finally stopped. Yet again there was a round of applause from the small crowd in front of him with only a couple individuals refusing to clap because of the subject matter of the song. Jason didn’t care. They were obviously the minority in Alexandria and accidents could easily happen.

 

_Jason dashed down the street as fast as he could, sweat rolling down the sides of his face, gasping for air as his legs burned from the exertion. He reached the wall and without hesitation began climbing the large sheet of steel. He placed his feet on the horizontal support beams while he grasped the vertical beam tightly with both hands, his arms straining from the physical effort of lifting his body weight up so high. Eventually, Jason made it to the top and after checking for any signs of walkers, he jumped down, absorbing the impact with the ground with his knees by bending himself down into a crouch._

_Jason jogged through the woodland, the leaves rustling beneath his feet as he moved quickly, pushing low hanging branches out of his way. Eventually he came to a clearing and froze on the spot, panting desperately for breath. There, standing in front of him was Kellin. Jason’s legs shook as he took in the sight. Kellin looked just as radiant as he always had, especially under the glow of the morning sun. He was dressed in the brown cargos and Jason’s old B-3 bomber jacket. His blonde hair was combed back and blew slightly out of place on the breeze._

_Kellin grinned as he stared back at his lover. “Hey Squishy.”_

_Jason let out a shaky breath as he took a hesitant step forward. “Kellin? Is it really you?”_

_Kellin nodded his head as he beamed back ecstatically._

_Jason felt what was left of his resolve leave him. He rushed forward, closing the gap between them with blinding speed as he wrapped his arms around Kellin’s neck and pulled them together. Jason’s lips crashed into Kellin’s, his tongue desperately seeking permission which was immediately granted. They both moaned into the kiss, their arms pulling their bodies tightly together in desperate need of intimacy._

_Kellin broke the kiss momentarily, not moving his head. “I love you so much.”_

_“I love you too, always have and always will.” Jason replied, his heart swelling._

_Their lips crashed together again as Jason gently pushed Kellin back against a tree trunk. His hands slipped under Kellin’s shirt, feeling the cool and soft expanse of skin while their tongues continued to duel. Nothing around them mattered anymore. They were together again and Jason was determined to make up for lost time._

_When Jason broke the kiss this time, he reeled back in horror. Kellin’s appearance had drastically changed. His hair was dark and unkempt with patches of it missing from his head. His skin was a dark grey colour and his eyes were dark pink. His lips had been ripped off, leaving his dark yellow teeth on full display, bits of flesh hanging between them. His clothes were dirty, blood stained and torn. Kellin was a walker._

_“Why didn’t you save me?” Kellin asked, his rotting teeth clanking together._

Jason shot up in bed, panting for air with a cold sweat rolling down his face. His whole body shook as the images from his nightmare were still fresh in his mind. He held his head in his hands for a few moments before turning to check on Carl. The younger boy was sound asleep, so Jason slipped out of bed and headed into their en-suite bathroom.

Jason studied his expression in the mirror before splashing cold water on his face to bring him firmly back to reality. It had been a nightmare, none of it had been real. Despite knowing this, he couldn’t help shake the emotional pain and the sheer horror that coursed through his whole body as a consequence of the night terror.

When he returned to the bedroom he pulled on his clothes and shoes before silently making his way downstairs. Everyone appeared to be asleep, allowing him to slip out the front door and into the street without question. Jason kept his hands in his jacket pockets as he walked along the dark, deserted street. The night time air was cool and refreshing, a gentle breeze caressing his face as he kept walking.

“Silly Squishy.”

Jason froze. He whipped his head round, twisting his body all the way around in search of the source of the voice. He knew he had heard it. It hadn’t just been his imagination because the voice had been as clear as day and eerily familiar.

“This way, silly.”

Jason spun round again and stopped when his eyes found the source. Leaning back against the perimeter wall was Kellin, still in Jason’s bomber jacket and with his hands on his hips. He beckoned Jason over with a wave of his hand before climbing the wall and dropping over onto the other side.

Jason ran towards the wall, jumping up onto it before he carefully climbed over it and dropped down on the other side. The woodland was almost pitch black, illuminated only by the moonlight. He kept his knife at the ready as he made his way through the trees in search of Kellin once more. After a few moments of walking, he came to the same clearing that he had stopped at before.

In the middle of the clearing stood a tall teen with messy light brown hair. Feet covered by black walking boots, legs covered by dark blue jeans and his torso covered with a buttoned up black shirt. On top of the shirt he wore an unzipped sleeveless red fleece, small bracelets on his wrists and a dark necklace round his neck. Jason instantly recognised one of his oldest friends, Sam.

“Jason, what are you doing?” Sam asked him, his arms folded.

“What do you mean what am I doing?” Jason answered with a question of his own.

Sam sighed and gestured around them. “You’re walking around in corpse infested woods at night. Why?”

“Kellin’s out here somewhere.” Jason replied, his voice shaking slightly. “I keep seeing him and I need to know why.”

“Because you still blame yourself for his death.” A deeper voice spoke from behind him. “You need to let it go. You weren’t to blame.”

Jason turned to see a tall man with broad shoulders and slicked back black hair. The man was dressed in full police uniform and kept one hand rested on the top of his holstered Glock 17. The police officer was none other than William Clarke, Jason’s father.

“Dad?” Jason asked breathlessly.

“I’m proud of you, son. You’ve grown into a strong man.” William praised him, holding his shoulders. “You can do anything you put your mind to. So you need to always do the right thing, okay?”

“How do I know if I’m doing the right thing?” Jason asked, unsure of himself.

“Because the right choice is the one that keeps you alive.” A third voice answered. “The right choice is the one that keeps Carl alive.”

Jason turned to see another police officer. This officer was tall and muscular, wearing a different coloured uniform to William with the addition of black gloves. The man’s large nose and thick black hair made him instantly recognisable.

“Shane?” Jason questioned, his head starting to pound painfully.

“You can’t be the good guy and expect to live anymore.” Shane continued. “So you do whatever you gotta do to keep you and Carl alive.”

The three of them turned their attention away from Jason as someone else stepped into the clearing. Dressed in dark brown shoes, black jeans, black shirt and black leather jacket with a black eyepatch covering their right eye was the Governor. Jason glared at him as he made his approach.

“You’re too weak to keep the boy alive. You’re too weak to keep yourself alive.” The Governor told him, his voice loud and threatening. “In the real world, heroes lose. Heroes die. The same will happen to you.”

Jason growled before stepping forward. “Says the dead guy.”

The Governor glared back at him before advancing towards him. The other three were silent as the tall man made his approach. In the last few seconds the vision of the Governor vanished as a loud snarl came from his mouth. Jason quickly stepped back as the Governor changed into a walker, reaching out for Jason and growling hungrily. Jason wasted no time in stabbing it in the temple, ending its reanimated existence.

As he pulled the knife out of the walker’s skull, he heard the loud shuffling of leaves behind him and turned round in time to watch an arrow imbed itself in the second walker’s skull. The walker dropped to the ground as Jason turned to his right to see Daryl standing in the clearing, still aiming his crossbow.

“How long have you been standing there?” Jason asked, angry at having been exposed.

“Long enough.” Daryl answered gruffly.

“Let me guess, Rick sent you to babysit me?” Jason spat.

Daryl walked over to retrieve the arrow from the walker’s skull. “We’re on the same side. He’s trying to help.”

“I don’t need help.” Jason argued stubbornly.

“Sure as hell didn’t look like it.” Daryl retorted.

“Fine, go tell Rick that I’m now a resident of cuckoo land.” Jason exclaimed, walking past Daryl. “I’m sure that’ll make everything better, right?”

Daryl didn’t reply. He didn’t know what to say that would change Jason’s mind or attitude in that moment. The archer remained silent and watched as Jason stormed off back to Alexandria.

 

When Jason returned to the house and entered the bedroom, he discovered Carl was still fast asleep. He smiled at the sight and took off his clothes, dumping them on the chair by his bedside. He slipped under the covers beside Carl and gently wrapped his arms around the smaller teen, spooning him as he let his eyes fall shut.

Unknown to Jason, Carl was in fact wide awake. He smiled when Jason’s arms wrapped around him, always feeling safe and comforted in the older teen’s embrace. Carl’s mind was a maelstrom of questions and possibilities. He could tell Jason had a nightmare and judging by how long it had taken for him to return to bed, he had hallucinated again. Jason still didn’t know that Carl knew, so he wouldn’t talk about it until Carl said something. Enid’s words still rang inside his mind.

_“Carl, I know it’s none of my business but I think you should stay away from Jason for a while.” Enid commented, her expression still void of emotion._

_Carl practically reeled back in response. “Why?”_

_“I saw him in the woods this morning and he was hallucinating.” Enid explained, trying to sound sincere. “He’s going crazy and he might be dangerous.”_

_“Stop it!” He barked back at them. “He would never hurt me!”_

_“How do you know for sure?” Ron asked, uncertain._

_Carl grit his teeth in frustration. Jason loved him. “I know him.”_

_“You didn’t know he was hallucinating.” Enid remarked._

Carl made his decision. After class the following day he would sit Jason down and talk to him about the hallucinations. With the decision made, he snuggled back against Jason’s larger body and let sleep take him once again.

 

 Morning took the form of a clear blue sky, a brilliantly bright sun and the ever present chorus of birds singing. The sun reflected off Alexandria’s solar panels as they soaked up its energy to power the town’s electricity. Beside the large panels stood Rick and Michonne in their uniforms along with Daryl.

“Seems like he’s losin’ it.” Daryl explained gruffly. “Seeing people and shit.”

“Is he dangerous?” Rick asked the most important question.

“Only to himself.” Daryl replied honestly.

Rick rested his hands on his hips and thought for a moment, turning to Michonne. “So, what do we do about it?”

“We wait.” Michonne told them. “He’s not gonna trust us if we smother him.”

Rick nodded and turned back to Daryl. “You keep an eye on him until he’s ready to talk.”

“Sure.” Daryl replied with a nod of his own.

 

The warm water cascaded down their bodies as Jason and Carl embraced in the shower. Showering together had become a morning routine and they both equally relished it. Jason stood behind Carl with his left arm around the smaller teen’s chest, holding him close against his body while his right hand was wrapped firmly around Carl’s solid manhood. Carl’s head rested against Jason’s shoulder as soft moans escaped his mouth.

Neither of them ever actively decided to pleasure each other in the shower each morning as it was something that happened naturally. One moment they would be cleaning themselves or each other and the next they would be giving in to their amorous lust. Carl’s legs felt like they were made of jelly as Jason stroked him faster while placing soft kisses on his neck, occasionally whispering things to him. Jason’s whispers ranged from innocent comments to filthy confessions that only served to fuel Carl’s sexual hunger.

“You gonna cum for me, Carl?” Jason whispered dirtily in his ear. “I love to watch you cum.”

Carl moaned louder, not used to Jason’s tongue turning him on with words instead of licks or kisses. Not only was Carl experiencing the soothing heat of the shower water, the hungry kisses upon his neck and the increasingly faster strokes of his shaft but he could also feel Jason’s own hardness pressing firmly against his lower back.

Jason increased the speed of his strokes, focusing mostly on the head of Carl’s member while he bucked his own against Carl’s back. The extra stimulus was all Carl needed for his legs to shake, his hips to buck and for Jason’s name to leave his mouth as he came in Jason’s hand. Jason smiled as he continued to pump Carl through his orgasm before letting the shower water wash away the mess.

Carl spun around and kissed Jason strongly, gently pushing him against the shower wall. He broke the kiss to move down to Jason’s neck, then to his collarbones before kissing down his chest. Jason watched him with breathless anticipation because he had a firm idea of what Carl’s plan was. As Carl’s lips reached his navel, it became clear to him that he was right. Carl stopped once he was kneeling in front of Jason, the older teen’s hard member level with his face. He looked up at his lover nervously.

“You don’t have to.” Jason assured him, stroking his long, wet hair.

“I want to.” Carl replied confidently.

“Okay then.” Jason replied with a breath. “Start slowly, lick it to get used to the taste before using your mouth.”

Carl did as instructed, his tongue darting out and licking the tip of Jason’s member. He continued to lick the sides of the shaft slowly, getting used to the taste of Jason’s skin on his tongue before he worked his way back up to the tip with Jason gasping above him.

“Okay, now go slowly.” Jason instructed, breathing heavily. “Don’t take it all at once or you’ll choke yourself.”

Carl nodded before opening his mouth and taking the head of Jason’s shaft into it. Jason gasped loudly above him as he felt the warm, wet cavern of Carl’s mouth take him in. It was a sensation he hadn’t experienced in almost a year and he had almost forgot what it felt like. Carl continued to take more of the shaft into his mouth, testing how far he could go. Jason moaned softly above him as he took it in further and further.

Suddenly Carl pulled back as the tip had reached the back of his throat, provoking his natural gag reflex. Due to his inexperience, he wasn’t brave enough to take that much of Jason’s manhood into his mouth and instead chose to take in only half of it. Jason tilted his head back as his hands continued to play with Carl’s hair, his body shivering with ecstasy.

“You can move your head and use your hand.” Jason suggested with a pleased smile.

Carl nodded before taking him back inside his mouth. He took half of Jason into the moist cavern of his mouth before pulling back then taking it back in. Carefully, Carl closed his lips around the shaft and proceeded to move his head back and forth while one of his hands stroked what he couldn’t fit in his mouth. Above him, Jason’s eyes were closed as soft moans escaped his open lips, pleasure shooting through his body like electric shocks.

The more Carl moved his head the more confident he became. He started to gradually increase the speed of his head and hand movements, with his tongue licking the head of Jason’s member every time it entered his mouth. Carl smiled around his boyfriend’s ardent erection as he heard Jason’s moans and gasps become steadily louder. Jason’s moans only spurred Carl on to increase the speed and strength of his movements.

Carl was so focused on pleasing Jason as well as Jason had done for him the previous morning that he hadn’t heard Jason’s desperate warnings. Carl’s eyes widened as warm liquid burst into his mouth as Jason cried out his name. Carl reeled his head back and spat out what he could of Jason’s offering onto the shower floor, finding the taste unpleasant and strange.

“Sorry.” Jason apologised with a weak laugh.

Carl smiled back, a sign that the apology was unnecessary. Jason helped lift Carl to his feet so he could kiss him under the warm spray of the shower. When they broke the kiss they quickly finished their shower so they could get dressed and start their day, both of them silently hoping that they hadn’t been too loud.

 

While Jason and Carl sat in the front room with Rick and Carol, there was a knock on the front door. Carol’s domestic instincts dictated to her to be the one to get up and answer the door. The door swung open to reveal Aaron standing in the doorway with a Polaroid camera in his hands.

“Good morning.” Aaron greeted chirpily as Rick joined Carol in the doorway.

“Morning.” Rick greeted with a nod, matched by Carol.

“You know, on our way here you grew suspicious because I didn’t have any photos of the people here.” Aaron explained as Rick narrowed his eyes. “So, I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind me taking your photos for future recruits?”

Rick thought for a moment. He wasn’t sure how he felt being identified by strangers in a photo, even if they were to be future residents. Before he could answer, Carl spoke up.

“That’d be awesome!” He declared excitedly.

Unable to deny the boy, Rick stepped aside and allowed Aaron to come into the house. They all headed to the front room where Jason had remained seated on the sofa. Rick and Aaron looked around the room.

“Where do you want us?” Rick inquired, standing by the small table that sat under the window.

“Just there by the window.” Aaron told them.

Rick stood side on, turning his head towards Aaron. He didn’t enjoy having his picture taken. Carl stood next to him in the same position while Jason stood behind Carl, a hand on his shoulder. Aaron pushed the button, the camera let out a blinding flash of light before making a few mechanical noises. Moments later, the photo emerged from the top of the camera.

“Thanks, guys.” Aaron smiled, carefully pocketing the photo.

“Aaron?” Jason caught the man’s attention. “Do you mind doing one of me and Carl?”

Aaron looked at him curiously but nodded nonetheless.

“Thanks.” Jason continued. “I have a photo of my ex in my diary. I wanted one of Carl too.”

Carl smiled at the considerate thought and the fact that he would be included in one of Jason’s most precious possessions. The two lovers stood against the support beam in the centre of the large downstairs area. Jason leaned his back against it and wrapped his arms around Carl’s waist from behind, both of them grinning to the camera. Aaron pressed the button and the camera flashed yet again before producing the black and white Polaroid.

Jason thanked him as he took the photo and placed it in his inside jacket pocket. He planned to put it in his diary later on so that it would join his photo of Kellin. No matter what happened from that point on, he would be able to carry Carl with him wherever he went. Carl thanked him as well before they all said their goodbyes so that Aaron could leave and take more photos.

 

That afternoon’s class was proceeding as Jason expected it to. He stood at the front of the class with a selection of guns from the armoury, all of which were empty. It had been the only way he could convince Olivia and Deanna to allow him to give this particular lesson. Guns were allowed. Ammunition was not.

On the table sat several guns that Jason had selected. A Beretta 92FS, a Desert Eagle Mark XIX, an M4A1 Carbine assault rifle, a Benelli M4 shotgun, a Heckler & Koch PSG1 sniper rifle and an AKMSU assault rifle which was one of Jason’s favourites. The exercise was simply about testing the class on what their weapon choices would be if they had to grab one and educating them about their choices.

“Have you asked him about the hallucinations?” Enid whispered to Carl, leaning over her desk to him.

Carl shook his head. “Not yet.”

Enid rolled her eyes in annoyance. “Well, you should. Before something happens.”

“Nothing’s going to happen!” Carl snapped back, whispering louder.

“You don’t know that.” Enid countered.

“Neither do you.” Carl retorted.

A loud cough from the front of the class interrupted them as Jason stood with his hands on his hips, staring at the two of them.

“Experience does not grant you the right to talk all the way through class.” Jason commented. “Unless of course you happen to know where Mikey is today?”

“He’s at home.” Ron spoke up.

“Do you know why?” Jason inquired, his brow furrowing with confusion.

“He said he didn’t want to come to class.” Ron explained with a shrug of his shoulders.

“Is that right?” Jason questioned, trailing off into his own thoughts.

 

After class, Carl headed home to take care of Judith. Jason agreed to meet him back there after he had stopped by Mikey’s house to find out why he was skipping class. Jason knocked on the door and waited for someone to answer. After a few moments the door opened to reveal the black haired teen, Mikey. The younger lad tried to close the door in Jason’s face but Jason held it open with one of his arms.

“Why’d you skip class?” Jason asked simply.

“It’s none of your business.” Mikey retorted, walking into his house.

Jason followed him. “As your teacher, it actually is my business.”

Mikey sighed. “My dad doesn’t want me around you.”

“Why not?” Jason questioned, folding his arms.

“Because of what you are!” Mikey spat. “Now I can’t see my friends because you’re there to ruin it.”

Jason narrowed his eyes. “And what am I, Mikey?”

“My dad says you’re a paedophile!” Mikey spat out. “Bad enough that you’re gay but that’s even worse!”

Jason unfolded his arms and glared back at him. “I’m bisexual and I’m not a paedophile. Carl’s mature enough to consent.”

“I’ll believe my dad over you!” Mikey continued.

“That’s convenient, given that you and your dad know almost nothing about the world these days.” Jason countered.

“Don’t talk about my dad!” Mikey threatened.

“I’ll talk about him if I like.” Jason retorted. “He’s a coward and a liar, from what I’ve seen anyway.”

Mikey’s reaction to these statements took Jason off guard as the boy’s fist flew towards his face, striking him in the corner of his chin. Jason’s head spun around and he was knocked slightly off balance. His instincts kicked in allowing him to catch the second punch in his hand before he slammed Mikey against the wall, twisting his arm up his back.

“Don’t be stupid.” Jason scolded him.

A flash of movement in Jason’s peripheral vision caught his attention. Before he could react, a large pair of hands grabbed onto him and forced him away from Mikey, shoving him against the wall.

“Get off my boy!” Nicholas growled.

“He was the one that sucker punched me.” Jason retorted angrily. “I guess cowardice runs in this family.”

Nicholas had clearly had enough. He swung a punch in Jason’s direction but the younger man dodged it but was not fast enough to avoid the second punch that quickly followed. Nicholas’ fist collided with Jason’s jaw and caused him to stagger back down the hall. Before Jason could regain his footing to retaliate, Nicholas charged into him with a powerful tackle that forced him down the hall. Jason slammed back first into a door, the lock splintering as it was forced open. Nicholas continued to push Jason until he hit a sofa and toppled over it onto the floor.

Jason growled angrily as he got to his feet in time for Nicholas’ approach. As the curly haired man rapidly approached, Jason turned side on and delivered a powerful kick to the other man’s gut, forcing him to double over in painful reflex. Jason quickly closed the distance between them and grabbed Nicholas by his hair before he started punching him in the face repeatedly.

Jason grunted with effort while Nicholas groaned and growled in pain. Blood ran down Nicholas’ face as the blood vessels in his nose were burst from the multiple impacts. Blood trickled down Jason’s chin from his lip where Nicholas had punched him previously, reopening the wound he had received in his fight with Kevin.

A sudden smash stopped Jason’s attack as Mickey had slammed a glass ashtray over his head. Jason howled in pain and shoved Mickey away with a powerful swipe of his arm. This was all the time Nicholas needed to land a few more punches before tackling Jason again, pushing him through another doorway into the room with the pool table.

Nicholas slammed Jason’s lower back against the pool table before kneeing him in the gut. Jason doubled over with a grunt of pain which became a sharp howl as Nicholas punched him square in the face, bursting his nose open as blood trickled down his mouth and chin. Jason growled and grabbed one of Nicholas’ punches and quickly slammed the older man’s fist against the edge of the table.

Taking full advantage of the brief opening, Jason delivered a powerful kick to Nicholas’ groin, earning a scream of agony from the man. Jason quickly grabbed Nicholas by the hair again and slammed the side of his head against the pool table two times before the older man forced himself free. The curly haired man swung a punch and struck Jason in the jaw before reaching out to grab his neck. As the man reached out for him, Jason grabbed his arm and used a judo technique that his father taught him to flip Nicholas off his feet and slam him on top of the pool table.

The pool table let out a deafening creak before the wood splintered and the legs gave way, bringing the table crashing to the floor loudly. Jason kicked Nicholas in his side before kneeling on top of him. He punched the older man twice before he reached for one of the broken table legs. Jason held the thick piece of wood tightly in his hand and raised his arm up to deliver the finishing blow.

His victory was prevented, however, when someone’s vice like grip grabbed his wrist before a muscular arm wrapped itself around his chest and pulled him off Nicholas. Jason kicked out and fought against his new assailant but was unable to break free from Daryl’s vice like hold. Jason hollered as blood continued to pour down from his nose and lips, blood spraying everywhere with each word he shouted.

“Get off me!” Jason bellowed. “I’m finishing it!”

Rick and Michonne entered the room with Rick holding his revolver at the ready. They studied the scene, a bloody and beaten Nicholas lying on a smashed pool table, an equally blooded Jason restrained by Daryl and a terrified Mickey in the corner of the room.

“Let’s take them to the infirmary.” Rick told Daryl and Michonne. “Separate them and find out what happened.”

 

Fifteen minutes later they were all in the infirmary. Jason and Nicholas were in separate rooms, with Pete tending to Nicholas’ injuries and Rosita tending to Jason’s. Deanna paced the hallway outside angrily while she waited for Pete and Rosita to finish their work. As soon as Pete exited one of the rooms, Deanna marched in to interrogate Nicholas.

“What happened?” She asked sternly.

“He’s crazy and dangerous. He came round to the house and threatened my son.” Nicholas explained, lying through his teeth. “I told him to leave and he just attacked me like he was possessed. He can’t stay here, Deanna.”

“That’s for me to decide.” Deanna replied quickly.

In the other room, Rick stood by Jason after Rosita had left them alone. The group leader and community’s constable stared down at the young man with narrow eyes and with his hands on his hips.

“What happened in there?” Rick asked simply, not taking sides until he had heard an explanation.

Jason sighed and groaned from the remaining throbs of pain. “Put simply? Same as that Kevin guy.”

“According to Daryl, you looked like you were about to kill him.” Rick commented, tilting his head.

“That’s kinda what I was going for, yeah.” Jason replied with a shrug.

“We can’t afford to do that anymore.” Rick told him, as he didn’t want the incident to expose his planned coup.

Before Jason could respond, the door swung open as Deanna entered the room. Her face was stern and unreadable. For the small woman that she was, her presence was surprisingly intimidating in that moment.

“What happened?” She asked the same question.

Jason glanced down at his split knuckles. “Went round to find out why Mickey had skipped class. Turns out his father has convinced him I’m some sort of paedophile. He tried to hit me and I restrained him. Nicholas came in and attacked me.”

“I gave you a warning at the party, do you remember what it was?” Deanna asked him, glaring angrily.

“Is that a rhetorical question?” Jason countered sarcastically, the rage fuelled adrenaline still coursing through him.

“If that’s your answer then this discussion is over.” Deanna responded coldly. “You can’t be allowed to stay here. You’re no longer welcome here.”

Jason glared back at her, his rage increasing. “You’re gonna exile me because the man in there is a liar?”

“Two fights in as many days.” Deanna explained. “You’re too volatile for this community. I’m sorry.”

“He’s not going anywhere.” Rick challenged with a growl.

“Rick, leave it.” Jason quickly countered.

“No. You’re too important to Carl.” Rick retorted, returning his glare to Deanna. “He’s not leaving.”

“Yes, I am.” Jason spoke up again before Deanna could respond. “And I’ll go willingly if you give me one last night with Carl.”

“You’ll leave tomorrow morning at sunrise.” Deanna told him, nodding in agreement to his request.

“I should warn you though.” Jason replied as Deanna prepared to leave. “You will regret this. That is a promise.”

Deanna didn’t answer, she simply walked out and closed the door behind her. She had many preparations to make if Jason was going to be exiled in the morning. Once she was out of the building, Rick turned angrily to Jason.

“You’re not going anywhere.” Rick told him. “We’ll take this place. Tonight.”

Jason shook his head. “These people are naïve, Rick. You really think I won’t find my way back?”

Rick paused for thought, part of his mind starting to work out what Jason had planned.

“Let them learn from this mistake.” Jason told him. “I’ll be back to show them how weak and defenceless they are.”

“What are you going to tell Carl?” Rick asked, his priority being his son.

“I’m not going to tell him.” Jason answered. “I’ll be back before he gets suspicious.”

“What’s your plan?” Rick asked but Jason remained silent. “You have a plan, so what is it?”

“It’s easier if I don’t tell you.” Jason replied after a moment. “That way, if you’re asked, you won’t have to lie.”

Rick decided not to force the information out of his son’s boyfriend. He trusted his ability to survive, especially against the weakness and naivety of the Alexandria community. The way things were looking, Rick was convinced they would have to take over the community by the end of the week.

Jason cracked his knuckles, wincing at the pain that shot through his hands from the cuts on them. Deanna was an imbecile if she really believed Jason would willingly leave Carl behind. Jason had no intention of being away from Carl and after her decision to side with one of the few homophobes in the community, he had lost all his respect for her. Jason would be exiled. Jason would return. Jason would exact his revenge.

 

**First and foremost, my sincerest apologies for taking so long to get this chapter up. After the publishing of chapter 19, I had super mega important exams to focus on. Since then I’ve been working a lot and catching up with a bunch of stuff on my to-do list.**

**However, all my ideas, plans etc. are all noted down for this fanfic. I deliberately plan in such a way so I can always continue writing no matter what.**

**I’m not sure how I feel about this chapter. I don’t feel like it was one of the best I’ve written but perhaps my self-criticism is just too strong. In any case, most of this was a setup for the coming chapters that will be far more explosive and interesting. The main focus of this chapter was Jason’s loosening grasp on his sanity, so hopefully that has come across correctly.**

**Like with most of my chapters of this fanfic, there’s a few Easter eggs hidden away. Can you find them?**

**Recently I’ve taken time to work on the prequel to this fanfic which will show Jason’s life before the apocalypse and during, up until his run in with Carl. I also have plans for the Season 6 portion of this story, depending on what happens in that season. On a morbid note, I have the “theme tune” to Jason’s death in my Walking Dead playlist on ITunes. I don’t intend to kill him yet, but chances are he might not make it in the end. I’m undecided.**

**The songs used in this chapter are:**

**Fighting For Your Love – Andrew Lawrence (Dead Rising 3 OST)**  
**Start Of Something Good – Daughtry (Break The Spell)**  
 **Take Me To Church – Hozier (Hozier)**

**Thanks for all the favourites/follows/subscriptions/kudos/votes/bookmarks etc.**

**Special thanks to the reviewers of chapter 19: The Sorrowful Deity, APEX CALIBRE, Youngblooded, sexy10, J, TigerInTheMoonlight, Paisley2,  The_Man_Called_Madara, Sara_94, Chancey, EVAlynn, kgbufo, super fan, lyndzemarie777,  vmbaby, story, walkingdeadfan_256, BB & the two anonymous guests. **

**And again, a massive thank you for your extended patience in the very long wait for this update. Chapter 21 will be up far quicker than this one was, I can guarantee it.**

**Please leave a review/comment so I know what I did right/wrong and what you’re expecting/hoping for from future chapters!**

 

 


	21. Exiled

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As per Deanna's request, Jason is exiled out of Alexandria. However, the whole situation turns into a fight for survival that fuels Jason's desire for revenge.

“Are you sure about this?” Rick asked gruffly, his eyes narrowed.

He and Jason were walking along the main street of Alexandria. A few minutes previously they had left the infirmary after the disagreement with Deanna that had ended in Jason’s exile. Jason was still rubbing his split knuckles while wincing at the aches over his body with each step. After Deanna had left, Jason had explained to Rick that he would allow himself to be exiled just to prove a point. They both knew that the people of Alexandria were not experienced enough to exile him properly or execute him, so his return would be a question of time.

Jason nodded. “I’m sure. This will work and they will learn.”

“What if it doesn’t work?” Rick asked sincerely.

“It will.” Jason answered with a shrug. “Besides, if I’m not back by sunset tomorrow then you should just take this place.”

“Taking this place won’t bring you back if anything happens.” Rick countered, smiling towards distant residents to avoid suspicion.

“Which is why you just have to trust me.” Jason replied.

“I do. But you need to start trusting us.” Rick commented, referencing Jason’s secret hallucinations. “We’re a family and you’re part of it. You’re family.”

Jason couldn’t help a warm smile spread across his face at Rick’s sentimental statement. “I know and I will. When I get back.”

They had reached their house and opened the door. As soon as the door swung open and Jason stepped inside, Carl rushed over to him and wrapped his arms around the older teen in a tight hug.

“What happened?” Carl asked, observing the injuries Jason had received.

“I got into a fight with Nicholas.” Jason explained to Carl. “I’m okay, just a bit banged up.”

“Why were you fighting him?” Carl asked, taking a step back to question him.

“Because he’s like that Kevin guy.” Jason answered. “Don’t worry, he’ll be punished for it so it’s all going to be okay.”

“Are you sure?” Carl questioned sceptically.

“I’m sure.” Jason nodded.

Rick felt uncomfortable watching Jason lie to his son’s face and felt even worse from not saying anything to put it right. He knew Carl would want to get involved if he learned what Deanna’s decision had been and Jason appeared to be keenly aware of that too.

Jason raised his hand up to his mouth to cover it as he yawned forcefully. It was evening and the fight had left him bruised and tired. He winced as he stretched his body before smiling weakly back to Carl.

“I should probably go for a lie down.” He told the younger teen. “You can join me if you like.”

Carl nodded almost instinctually and followed Jason up the stairs to their room. In the silence of their journey to the room, Carl’s thoughts were on the promise he made to himself to ask Jason about his hallucinations and learn the truth. He couldn’t let Jason continue hiding his problems because it was only a matter of time before they got him killed.

When they got in their room, Jason slumped himself down on the bed and pulled out his diary from the bedside drawer. Carl closed the bedroom door behind him and sat down on the dressing table chair after dragging it over to be opposite Jason. He watched silently as Jason wrote an entry in his diary about the fight and, unbeknown to the younger teen, about his plan for the exile. Jason knew that by doing so they would have evidence if things went wrong.

Once Jason had finished writing the entry, he glanced up at Carl and smirked. Carl was the one person whose gaze could be upon him and he wouldn’t feel uncomfortable. He pulled out the Polaroid photo from his back pocket and slotted it into the diary. Jason looked up in time to catch the warm grin on Carl’s face, obviously pleased with being immortalised in Jason’s diary just as Kellin was.

“You seem a little bored.” Jason commented, rousing Carl from his thoughts.

Carl shrugged. “I guess.”

Carl knew it was an opportune moment to discuss the hallucinations but he felt a tightening in the pit of his stomach. He knew how to start the discussion, he had rehearsed it in his head multiple times throughout the day. He just needed to say the words. Every time he went to open his mouth, however, Carl’s stomach tightened more and his body felt paralyzed.

“How can we change that?” Jason asked, oblivious to Carl’s internal struggle.

“Can you sing something with the guitar?” Carl asked, almost bashfully because his inner ponderations had him so anxious.

Jason took a moment to observe Carl. He enjoyed the little moments in which he could just stare and admire the younger teen as if he was an expensive painting. He never thought he could ever meet someone who could captivate him as much as Kellin had but Carl had proven him wrong.

Jason smiled and nodded. “Sure. Any requests?”

Carl shrugged. “You can pick, I know I’ll like it.”

Jason got up and grabbed the guitar from the corner of the room. He sat back down on the bed opposite Carl and checked the strings, smirking to himself. Playing the guitar and singing was one way of holding onto who he used to be, a way of coming to terms with change. Music had always had the power over him.

“This song means a lot to me, you know.” Jason told his boyfriend, looking up. “It reminds me that life isn’t perfect but it is worth it. Now more than ever.”

Carl nodded but retained a respectful silence as he waited excitedly in his chair. He couldn’t help but smile despite the apprehension that filled his gut over the hallucinations.

 Jason started strumming the guitar slowly, gently and soothingly. He rocked back and forth slightly and closed his eyes as he thought about the song, his strumming growing in complexity as he began the first verse.

“I’m falling apart again and I can’t find a way to make amends.” Jason sang softly. “And I’m looking in both directions but it’s make believe, it’s all pretend.”

Jason smiled to Carl before raising his singing voice.

“So, shed some light on me and hold me up in disbelief.” Jason sang louder. “Shed some light on me and tell me something that I’ll believe in.”

Jason paused for a moment before increasing the tempo and volume of his guitar strums, tapping his foot on the floor to act as a drum.

“It’s innocence within the maze but I have chosen the wrong way.” Jason sang, his thoughts on his violent behaviour and secrecy. “I’m still getting over who I was, there’s no sense of trust, no definition of love.”

Jason gazed at Carl lovingly. He didn’t care for other people’s opinions on their relationship. They loved each other and that’s all that mattered to him.

“So, shed some light on me and hold me up in disbelief.” Jason sang louder. “Shed some light on me and tell me something that I’ll believe!”

Jason dragged out the note on the last word before strumming the guitar loudly to get his breath back.

“Cause I know now it’s not who you are, it’s who you know and I see clearly now which way to go.” Jason sang strongly, conviction in his voice. “And I remember the way I fell from above and I recall the way I was.”

Jason glanced at Carl to check that he was enjoying the song. The look on his face was everything Jason could have asked for when performing and it filled him with pride.

“So, shed some light on me and hold me up in disbelief.” Jason sang loudly. “Shed some light on me and tell me something that I’ll believe in.”

“Shed some light on me and hold me up in disbelief.” Jason sang as strongly as he could. “Shed some light on me and tell me something that I’ll, I’ll believe!”

Jason strummed a few more chords on the guitar before looking up and staring right into Carl’s eyes, his voice low as he stopped playing.

“Tell me something I’ll believe.”

Carl grinned and applauded his older lover as Jason put the guitar down, resting it on the edge of the bed. Jason knew just from Carl’s face that he had enjoyed it and that fact was enough to plaster a large grin on his own face, despite the pain from his injuries.

“I can tell you something you’ll believe.” Carl told Jason suddenly.

Jason’s head snapped up in curiosity. “Oh yeah?”

Carl nodded and got out of his chair, standing with his knees against the bed as he stood close to Jason.

“I love you.” Carl confessed and wrapped his arms around Jason’s neck, pulling him in for a kiss.

Jason leaned into the kiss without complaint as his hands found Carl’s hips. He soon found himself lying back on the bed with Carl on top of him, their lips locked in a duel of passion while his hands continued to rub at Carl’s hips and sides.

 

Outside the perimeter walls, Rick, Carol, Daryl and Michonne had all gathered to discuss the situation. Rick had already explained to them about the fight, Jason’s argument with Deanna and the teen’s exile the following morning.

“We should be fighting this, not leaving him to work it all out.” Rick commented, his hands on his hips as he shook his head.

“We should talk to Deanna.” Michonne told him. “Get her to understand.”

“They don’t want to understand.” Carol countered flatly. “They’re still living in the past.”

“We can’t let them exile Jason.” Rick argued. “He’s one of us.”

“If Jason says he’ll come back then he will.” Carol told them confidently. “Remember he survived out there for half a year on his own.”

“What if they’re smart enough to blindfold him so he can’t find his way back?” Rick argued. He would only be convinced if all possibilities were covered.

“I could track ‘em.” Daryl suggested. “Or follow ‘em.”

“They’ll know if you’re following them and tracking a car is difficult.” Michonne commented. “Rick’s right, that could ruin Jason’s plan.”

“Then when they get back we get them to tell us.” Daryl suggested.

“How?” Michonne questioned. “They won’t want him back.”

“We all know how.” Daryl remarked darkly.

“We can’t risk losing what we have here.” Michonne told them. “We need this place, especially for Judith.”

“We can’t risk losing one of our own either.” Rick countered sharply.

“We could check their car when they get back.” Carol suggested, not wanting to reveal the coup to Michonne. “Compare it to before they left so we know how far out they took him.”

“It’s not exact but it’s something.” Michonne commented, considering their options.

“He’s like us, he’s one tough son of a bitch.” Daryl told them. “Trust him. If things go south then we do what we gotta do.”

 

Back in Jason and Carl’s shared room, their make out session had escalated in its ferocity. Jason remained lying on his back, though now they were in the centre of the bed with their shoes having been kicked off their feet. Their lips were still joined and their shirts lay in a heap on the floor.

One of Jason’s hands rubbed the expanse of Carl’s smooth back while his other hand was set between them. Carl held himself up with one arm while his other hand was also between their two bodies. Their jeans were undone and partially pushed down their thighs along with their boxers. They moaned gently into their kiss as they stroked each other quickly.

The whole situation had started shortly after Carl’s declaration of love. They had ended up with Carl on top of Jason while their tongues battled and in the process they had started grinding. When they were grinding against one another, both teens had quickly grown hard under their jeans leading to a little more lust than romance.

They continued stroking each other’s ardent needs, trying to match each other’s movements perfectly despite the odd knock of their fists. If Carl decided to focus on the head more than the shaft then Jason would match him exactly, drawing sharp gasps and loud moans from each of them.

Carl’s original intentions had been to relax Jason and get him to open up about his hallucinations. However, as soon as he had grown hard from sexual excitement most of his coherent thoughts had left him. He couldn’t really complain either as any intimacy with Jason was to be cherished.

Jason moaned into their kiss as he gave himself fully to Carl and the blinding pleasure they were sharing. He knew that it could potentially be their last ever time to be intimate together as the chances of his plan failing were high. He was determined to make his plan work but if it didn’t then he wanted to give Carl something to remember him by.

They broke the kiss to breathe better as the pleasure increased exponentially, forcing them to quickly bite each other’s necks to muffle their moans. Their arms ached from the constant motion but their hips were starting to buck as their fine rhythm gave way to rapid, desperate pumping as they chased their orgasms. With matching cries of pleasure both boys came into each other’s hands. They continued to stroke a couple more times before finally relaxing with Carl rolling off Jason and onto his back, panting.

“I love you too.” Jason breathed out, stroking Carl’s hair to the side with a smile.

 

Rick and Michonne had returned to the community and were walking down the main street together. With their windbreakers on, to anyone else it appeared as though they were just on a routine patrol.

“Has he told Carl?” Michonne asked the former sheriff.

Rick stared straight ahead. “No.”

“Is he going to?” Michonne continued, surprised by the answer.

“No.” Rick repeated.

Michonne stopped in her tracks. “Why not?”

Rick shrugged and stopped as well, turning to face her. “He doesn’t want Carl involved.”

“You know that won’t work, why didn’t you tell him?” Michonne questioned, surprised by Rick’s attitude towards it.

“I did but he thinks this is all going to work out the way he wants it to.” Rick answered.

“And will it?” Michonne asked, the question more rhetorical than interrogative.

“I don’t know.” Rick replied. “He didn’t tell me what his plan actually was.”

“Carl won’t rest until he finds out.” Michonne said with a sigh.

“Which is why I want you to distract him for as long as you can.” Rick told the samurai, knowing that it would allow him to discuss the coup with Carol.

Rick was having to fight his instincts and better judgement by trusting Jason’s unknown plan. In his mind, it was easier just to stand up against the exiling of the nineteen year old and take over Alexandria. The community’s treatment of Jason would be more than enough to convince the others to join the fight, especially considering how ill-prepared the people there were.

Michonne was apprehensive and angry. She thought Jason knew better than to keep such an important thing secret from Carl. Michonne cared about the boy like he was her own son and it filled her with anger to know Jason was ultimately going to hurt him. The betrayal of trust would hurt almost as much as his plan failing. She made a mental note to give him a firm talking to if it all worked out.

 

_Jason was with his friends in Sam’s garage, the only place big enough to store their guitars, drum kit and microphones. Jason stood behind the microphone as he was the lead singer of their band. The drum kit bore the same white tiger that was on Jason’s tank top on the front of its bass drum. It was their logo, they were The White Tigers._

_Sitting at the drum kit was Sam, the tall teen with messy light brown hair. His fashion sense reflected his personality; casual. Feet covered by black walking boots, legs covered by dark blue jeans and his torso covered with a buttoned up black shirt. On top of the shirt he wore an unzipped sleeveless red fleece, small bracelets on his wrists and a dark necklace round his neck. His eyes focused on the drums in front of him, sticks in hand._

_To Jason’s left stood his other friend, Ryan. Ryan was the same height as Jason but his dress sense was radically different. His jet black hair covered his head and most of his face in a classic emo style, leaving only his mouth visible, framed with snake bite piercings. He wore an unmarked black t-shirt and black skinny jeans held up by a studded belt. Black converse shoes completed his outfit while he finished tuning his guitar, black wristbands clinging to his wrists tightly._

_To Jason’s right stood the tallest of the four boys, Harry. Harry’s usually curly brown hair was slicked back though the weight of it made it stand up instead of fall back. His emerald green eyes were focused on the bass guitar as he checked that it was tuned correctly. He was the smartest dressed out of the four of them, smart black shoes, black skinny jeans, a tight black shirt and an unbuttoned black blazer with a red tartan interior._

_After having practiced several songs for their upcoming live performance in the local club they decided to take a break. Jason stepped away from the microphone and headed to the side of the garage where a six pack of water bottles sat on top of a work bench. He grabbed one of the bottles and quickly got to work drinking the refreshing liquid, soothing his throat after straining it slightly with some of the stronger notes. Harry and Ryan set their guitars aside and also drank some water, quickly followed by Sam._

_Jason sat down on the floor with his legs crossed, placing the bottle of water in between his crossed legs as he let out a sigh. Their performance had been good and it was always fun to sing with his friends but the memories of what had transpired in his previous relationship never left him. He really hoped the guy she chose to be with would do the same thing to her that she had done to Jason._

_A finger prodded his cheek and interrupted his thoughts. Jason raised his hand almost on reflex and knocked the finger away. He stared down at his bottle of water and wondered how he could have been so blind as to not notice that the girl had been cheating on him for so long. The same finger prodded his cheek again causing him to grunt in irritation and knock it away again, turning to his right to see who was poking him. Harry sat beside him with a goofy grin plastered on his face._

_“Bugger off, Haz.” Jason sighed irritably._

_“Not until you stop pouting.” Harry retorted with a thick English accent and deep voice._

_“We know you’re thinking about Jasmin.” Ryan piped up, leaning against the garage wall, water bottle in hand._

_“So?” Jason spat, lying on his back and twirling the water bottle in his hands._

_“So she’s a selfish bitch and you need to get over her.” Sam shot back, still sitting at the drum kit. “She’s not thinking about you so you need to stop thinking about her.”_

_“All you’ve been doing for days is sulking.” Ryan commented, glaring through his long black hair. “You need to move on.”_

_“Which is why we’re going into town today.” Harry commented, hovering over Jason waggling his fingers. “To take your mind off it.”_

_Jason glared up at his long haired friend. “Harold, if you dare tickle me I promise that murder will be done in this garage.”_

_Harry laughed but took mind of the warning, backing off and keeping his hands down as Jason sat back up._

_“Why do I get the impression you’re hoping I meet someone?” Jason questioned the tall teen beside him._

_Harry grinned. “We have a saying where I’m from; love is around every corner.”_

_Jason narrowed his eyes and nodded slowly. “Is that right?”_

_Harry nodded rapidly, his hair flopping with each nod. “There were lots of prostitutes in my neighbourhood.”_

_Jason brought the palm of his hand up to his head and groaned while the others chuckled in amusement. They found his reaction more amusing than the joking remark itself._

_“We could go in the now.” Ryan suggested. “Have a look at new music and games, get something to eat at Burger King or something before the club opens.”_

_The others nodded in agreement._

_Jason shook his head in disappointment as he stood up. “You guys go, I can’t join until later.”_

_“Why not?” Ryan asked before any of the others could say anything._

_“My dad has arranged for me to learn how to shoot.” Jason explained with a sigh, shoving his hands into his pockets. “Regardless of whether I want to or not.”_

_“Club doesn’t open till seven.” Harry answered in thought. “When’s your lesson?”_

_“I’m meeting my dad at the station at half five.” Jason answered. “So my lesson is at six, I guess?”_

_“Then give me a call after the lesson and I’ll meet up with you.” Sam offered. “We can meet Ryan and Harry at the club.”_

_Jason shrugged. “You don’t have to but it’s up to you guys.”_

_“It’s hardly a problem.” Sam retorted with a smirk._

_The other two nodded their heads in agreement. Jason let out a sigh of acceptance but couldn’t help letting a smirk crawl onto his face. He often forgot how flexible and considerate his three closest friends were and he valued them immeasurably._

_“So, is it a plan?” Harry confirmed._

_Jason nodded with a smile. “Yeah, it’s a plan. I’ll see you two at the Cathouse and I’ll see Sam at the train station.”_

The memories faded away as Jason was gently jolted back to reality. His body shook sporadically and pushed the smile off his face until he opened his eyes. The room was dark with Carl sleeping soundly beside him, his naked shoulders and collarbones visible. His hair draped down his face, a few strands of it being blown back and forth with every gentle breath. Jason turned his head and looked above him where Rick towered over him from the side of the bed, already in his uniform.

“Jason, it’s time.” Rick whispered. “Get dressed.”

Jason yawned and nodded solemnly, slowly rising out of bed and slipping out from under the covers so as to not wake Carl. Rick left the room and allowed him the privacy to get changed into his regular clothes. He checked to make sure the Taurus PT-909 was still hidden inside his leather jacket’s inside pocket. Jason pulled on his jacket and slipped on his fingerless gloves before attaching his knife holster to his belt.

Double checking that Carl was still asleep, Jason quietly made his way over to the bedside drawer and pulled out his diary. He marked the tallies for the day and then started writing on one of the pages. Once he had finished writing, he closed the book and left it on the next to the lamp. Jason looked down at Carl’s sleeping form and brushed the loose hair out of his face before kissing his forehead. For Jason, that kiss was a promise to return alive but it was also insurance for if he didn’t. At least he said goodbye.

Jason stepped out onto the front porch where Rick was waiting for him. In Rick’s hands were Jason’s thigh holster with his Springfield Armory TRP Operator handgun inside. Jason took it from him with a gentle nod and put it on. He was as ready as he would ever be for his exile. The streets were dark and the sky was a dark orange as morning approached. The only sounds were the birds chirping and the two men’s footsteps. As Rick and Jason walked towards the front gate, he could almost hear Rick’s thoughts.

“Remember, don’t do anything until sunset.” Jason told him quietly. “I’ll be back.”

“We don’t have to do this.” Rick pressed one last time.

Jason nodded with a cynical smirk. “Yeah, we do.”

They turned their attention back to the front gate. Parked parallel to the wall was a black Chevrolet Suburban people carrier. Standing beside it were two Alexandria residents, one of which was instantly recognised to be Kevin. He wore the same jeans and grey t-shirt as before as he stood in his habitual folded arms stance. Beside him was another, heavy set man with an unkempt black moustache and a receding hairline of messy, black curly hair. He was dressed all in black with smart chinos, a long sleeved black shirt and undone black blazer.

“What are you doing here?” Rick questioned Kevin with narrowed eyes.

“Me and Tony here are taking him.” Kevin told the constable, his arms remaining folder. “If you’ve got a problem then go cry to Deanna.”

Rick considered starting an argument but he relented. He would take it up with Deanna later, despite how uncomfortable Kevin’s presence made him. Jason seemed surprisingly calm considering the circumstances and stepped towards them.

Tony closed the gap between them and unclipped Jason’s knife and gun holsters. He handed them to Kevin to put in the front of the car before taking out duct tape. Jason held out his arms with his wrists together, knowing fine well what the duct tape was for. Tony wrapped a couple layers of duct tape around Jason’s wrists, firmly binding them unless cut with a knife. Jason sighed but knew this was all part of the exile process and he wouldn’t do any different in their position.

The next decision made by the men did surprise Jason and by extension, Rick. Tony opened the back door of the Chevrolet and tilted his head to the side as an instruction for Jason to get in. This was either an inexperienced blunder on their part or there was an ulterior motive, as it would make much more sense to blindfold him and bind his legs as well. Tony pulled out a gun from his inside pocket, a Sig-Sauer P230 and aimed it at Jason.

“Get in the damn car.” The man spoke with a deep and slightly raspy voice.

Jason closed his eyes for a moment and let out a deep breath that he didn’t know he was holding, letting his shoulders drop as his body relaxed. He opened his eyes again and walked forward before climbing into the car, the door being slammed behind him by Tony. The curly haired man glared at Rick who was glaring right back, visibly upset with the use of the gun for intimidation when Jason was offering himself willingly.

Kevin slammed the driver’s door shut and rolled down the window, slapping the side of the door with his hand as he peered out the window. There was a confident smirk sitting on his face that made Rick feel uneasy.

“Get in the car or I’m leaving you behind.” Kevin barked at his darkly dressed companion.

Tony broke away from the staring match with Rick and pocketed his gun. He walked round the car and got in the front passenger seat as the gates were opened. Jason looked out the windows to get one last look at the community of Alexandria before Kevin gunned the engine. Alexandria rolled out of Jason’s line of vision as the car drove out the gates and down the road. The Chevrolet was heading away from Alexandria, away from Rick, away from the group, away from safety and away from Carl.

Jason sighed as he glanced down at the duct tape that held his hands together at the wrists. It was tight and uncomfortable. He hoped with every fibre of his being that his plan would work out and he’d be back in Carl’s arms before sunset. However, Jason was keenly aware that his plans rarely worked out how he wanted them to.

 

A couple loud knocks on the front door prompted Deanna to rise from her sofa, where she had been reading, to answer it. The door swung open to reveal Rick standing behind it, hands resting on his police duty belt and a stern look on his face. Deanna knew that Rick had come to argue.

“If this is about Jason I’ve already made up my mind.” Deanna told him sternly.

“He’s already gone.” Rick replied, stepping into the hallway. “I just wanna know why you chose Kevin for the job.”

Deanna stared up at the constable. “He’s stronger than Jason, he can control him.”

“He started the fight they had.” Rick reminded her, tilting his head.

“That’s irrelevant.” Deanna countered. “Jason couldn’t stay here any longer and if his story is true then he’ll survive out there.”

“You don’t know what it’s like out there.” Rick spat. “It’s not just the walkers out there, it’s people too.”

“One person is not more important than the security of this community.” Deanna countered, visibly irritated by what she perceived to be a condescending tone from Rick.

“Is that what you plan to tell the others?” Rick questioned. “Is that how you’re going to tell my son that you banished his boyfriend?”

“Rick, I’m sorry that things turned out that way but difficult decisions have to be made.” Deanna replied, trying to be diplomatic.

“When Carl asks me where Jason is, I’m going to send him here.” Rick warned her, towering over the short woman.

“That’s fine with me.” Deanna replied, not wanting to back down despite how intimidating Rick was.

Rick glared at her for a few more moments before backing away and walking back out the front door. He made his way back out onto the street, feeling Deanna’s eyes on his back as he headed back to the house. Jason had until sunset to make his plan work and if he didn’t then Rick would begin the coup against Deanna.

 

Jason sat in the back of the van silently watching the world go by outside. There wasn’t much to see as they travelled the road but he made sure to commit everything to memory so he could find his way back. Burnt out cars, fallen trees, abandoned shacks and houses along with a view meandering walkers. Dogs, deer and coyotes could also be seen as they continued to drive down the desolate road.

He sighed and rested his head back against the headrest. At the front of the car Kevin and Tony were silent, probably wrapped up in their own thoughts. Jason didn’t mind, at least they weren’t throwing out nasty remarks or goading him into a fight. Guilt swept across his mind for not telling Carl what was happening but he trusted that the younger teen would find his diary entry. Jason promised himself and promised Carl to come back alive. He didn’t want to be away from the boy who had reawakened his heart.

After the death of Kellin, Jason had turned into a shadow of his former self. He was much like the walkers that roamed the world, an empty shell that focused only on doing what it needed to do. Meeting Carl had changed that, something about the young teen had sparked something inside Jason. His heart which had been cold and lifeless now felt warm and active again. Jason smiled as he reflected.

_The courtyard was filled with bodies and the walking dead. Abandoned cars also littered the area and in the prison’s main yard there was a burning tank that was surrounded by undead trying to get to it. Most of the undead were marching through the courtyard up to the tank and into the ruins of the prison blocks. His eyes scanned the area for any signs of life and came across one figure walking through the grass of the courtyard. It looked like a woman and she was walking towards a body that was writhing on the ground. Jason watched her as she shot the head of the body before looking around herself as all the nearby corpses swarmed her and tore her apart. He averted his gaze as she went down and by doing so he spotted two figures heading into the foliage. They looked injured and vulnerable, their pace slow and broken by the limping of one of the figures._

Jason reflected on his first time seeing Carl. He had no idea at the time that by following those two figures his life was set to change. There was no way he could have ever known or ever believed if told, that his future boyfriend was the one stumbling off into the woods away from the burning prison.

_Jason made it to the top of the stairs just as he heard one of the bedroom doors slam shut. He aimed his gun at the direction of the noise and studied the sight before him. With their back against the door as they tried to catch their breath was a boy. He couldn’t be any older than sixteen. He had a gun holster on the right thigh of his jeans but no gun. His dirty top was blue and grey. His long dark hair whipped out from under the sheriff’s hat he wore but the most striking thing was that he only had one boot on. Before Jason could make any more observations the boy froze as he finally became aware of Jason’s presence. He didn’t say anything. His eyes darted to his gun that lay on the floor, too far away to reach quickly. He stared back at Jason with an intense look of fear in his blue eyes._

_Sensing that the boy was afraid of him, Jason decided to attempt communication but kept his gun aimed at the boy._

_“Hey, kid.” He said calmly. “You okay?”_

_The boy stared at him for a moment, his breath still uneven. “I’m not a kid.”_

_Jason smirked but didn’t lower his aim. “Yeah, well you aren’t a man yet either.”_

_The boy didn’t answer him, unsure of how to respond._

_“What’s your name?” Jason asked him, trying to keep his tone friendly._

_The boy appeared to hesitate for a moment before finally answering. “Carl.”_

Jason remembered how careless he had been around Carl. He had always been extremely wary around people ever since the apocalypse began. At first it had been to protect Kellin and then it had been about self-preservation. Something about Carl had been different, there was something trustworthy about the boy that he hadn’t been able to place at the time. Perhaps his desire to no longer be alone warped his perception and clouded his senses. Jason couldn’t find it in him to care because it had all worked out in the end.

_They both sat on the rooftop with their legs dangling over the side and looked out onto the abandoned street. Carl opened the can and started taking spoonfuls of pudding, his taste buds jumping at the sweet taste. This was a taste he had almost forgotten._

_Without being prompted, Jason decided to answer Carl’s questions._

_“I’ve been alone for six months now.” He told the teen. “When it’s just you and the dead, you start to miss human contact.”_

_“What happened to the people you knew?” Carl asked him in between mouthfuls of pudding._

_“They all died.” Jason answered simply, not wanting to give details just yet._

_Carl didn’t push the question, having just lost everyone he cared about apart from his father, he knew how it felt and could only imagine how much harder it was being alone. As he studied Jason’s face, he realised that this man was a lot younger than he originally thought and couldn’t been any older than twenty._

_“I know you were living at that prison.” Jason stated. “I heard the battle and saw you and your dad escaping into the woodland.”_

_Carl stayed silent as the dots started to connect._

_“I saw that you were vulnerable and tried to catch up to you both.” He told the boy, looking away. “I didn’t want to be alone anymore.”_

_“But we could have been dangerous.” Carl told him, remembering how dangerous the Governor had turned out to be._

_“That’s why I aimed this at you for a while.” Jason told him, pulling out his Springfield Armory TRP Operator handgun. “But you seem like a good guy so I didn’t shoot you.”_

_Carl watched as he holstered the gun again. “When my Dad wakes up, he’ll want to talk to you.” He told the young man. “Find out if you’re a threat.”_

_“I can handle that.” Jason told him before lying back to look up at the sky as Carl continued to eat. “But for now, let’s enjoy the peacefulness of the afternoon.”_

_Carl seemed to agree and continued eating the pudding before he stopped, looking at the half empty can._

_“Do you want some?” He asked Jason, suddenly feeling quite selfish._

_“What?” Jason asked, having been lost in his thoughts for a moment._

_“Do you want some pudding?” Carl asked again._

_“No thanks. You’ve been through a lot today.” Jason replied with a smile. “You have it.”_

_Carl resumed his eating as Jason continued to look up at the sky. It was a beautiful afternoon with a clear blue sky. Scanning the sky he couldn’t see a single cloud for miles._

Jason smiled to himself. That first meeting was the perfect metaphor for what it felt like to be with Carl. Lazing about on a warm, sunny afternoon eating chocolate pudding. He made a mental note to make a better effort to do more romantic things for the boy. Jason didn’t want their relationship to alternate between survival and sex, he wanted warm, romantic and cuddly times as well.

 

Carl’s eyes fluttered open as the heat of the morning sun struck his face. He groaned in annoyance as he was comfortable and would have preferred to continue sleeping. He rolled over and spread his arm out to wrap around Jason’s body but his arm reached into nothingness before landing on the mattress. Carl’s eyes shot open as he realised that Jason wasn’t in bed with him.

Carl rubbed his eyes and sat up in bed as he properly woke up. He listened for the shower but the en-suite bathroom was silent, which meant Jason wasn’t there. His eyes scanned the room for Jason’s running clothes but they were on the chair in the corner. It was Jason’s regular clothes and jacket that were missing. Jason was already awake and dressed. Carl yawned as he threw the covers off and slipped out of bed, clad only in his boxers as he made his way into the bathroom for a shower.

The shower was a lonely and silent experience with the only sound being the spray of the water. Although the water was warm, Carl felt cold without Jason’s body next to him and hoped that at any moment the door would open and Jason would join him. Jason never did. Carl finished his shower and got dressed before heading down for breakfast.

When Carl reached the dining table he found Michonne sitting eating some cereal, already dressed in her constable uniform. She smiled to him in silent greeting as she had a mouthful of food, which she worked on chewing and swallowing as Carl sat down at the table opposite her.

“Morning.” Michonne greeted with a smile.

“Morning.” Carl huffed out tiredly.

Michonne noticed the odd tone in his voice, it was uncharacteristic to the usually chirpy Carl she knew. She stopped eating to stare at him, her spoon clanging against the bowl.

“What’s up?” Michonne asked innocently. She had a feeling she already knew the answer.

“It’s nothing.” Carl deflected, staring into his cereal. “I’m being stupid.”

“You’re allowed to be around me.” Michonne told him with a soft smile. “So, tell me before I flick my cereal at you.”

Carl couldn’t help but let out a light giggle at Michonne’s threat of a breakfast food fight. He lowered his head again and let out a heavy sigh, his tense shoulders falling as he did.

“Jason’s not here.” Carl told the samurai. “He’s usually there when I wake up.”

Michonne wasn’t surprised at Carl’s complaint but she also knew that she had to keep the truth a secret from Carl for as long as possible. Jason’s request angered her but she was too loyal to deviate from it. She resumed eating to appear more natural.

“He’s probably organising things for the next class.” Michonne suggested. “He can’t be that far away.”

“Yeah, I guess.” Carl muttered in response.

Michonne’s explanation was very plausible but something about it didn’t feel right to Carl. There was something off about the whole morning, he could swear he felt there was an elephant in the room. Carl sighed again before he continued eating. He would head out for a walk to find Jason after breakfast.

 

As trees and dilapidated buildings flew past the window of the car, Jason sighed as he continued to think about Carl. He had never expected to get with the younger teen due to the age gap and the high possibility of him not being that way inclined. The biggest obstacle and fear had been Rick, who on their first day meeting had threatened to gut Jason should he try anything. He remembered the words vividly.

_Rick’s glare intensified as he looked into Jason’s eyes._

_“What happened last night?” He asked coldly._

_“What do you mean?” Jason asked, hoping to play it stupid._

_“You know what I mean.” Rick retorted. “Why were you sleeping together?”_

_Jason had to quickly deflect the colloquial meaning of that phrase from his mind and focus on the literal meaning of Rick’s question. He realised it must have been strange for Rick to find Carl cuddled into the chest of a stranger._

_“He thought you had turned. It was hard to tell in the darkness.” Jason explained, hesitating with every couple words. “He was scared and crying, so I put an arm around him for comfort.”_

_Rick glared at him, expecting a longer explanation._

_“As soon as I did, he cuddled into my chest.” Jason explained, still hesitating. “So I embraced him and comforted him. It felt like the right thing to do.”_

_Rick took a step closer to the younger man, his glare and slightly taller build intimidating to Jason._

_“You didn’t_ _touch_ _him, did you?” Rick hissed._

_“What?” Jason asked as a reflex before quickly correcting himself. “No! No, of course not! I’m not like that. I swear!”_

_Rick narrowed his eyes and nodded slowly. “Good. But if you’re lying. If you touch him. I’ll gut you. You got that?”_

_Jason swallowed nervously, Rick’s intimidating glare and threats had actually caused him to sweat from anxiety. He nodded furiously._

_“Got it.” He confirmed, hands shaking._

Jason remembered how awkward the first few days had been. Rick and Michonne didn’t know him and didn’t trust him, with good reason given the state of the world. Carl trusted him for some bizarre reason that Jason still didn’t fully understand. When the claimers had reached the house and were a threat to Carl, Jason had acted on a whim by shooting at them.

Jason hadn’t intended to survive the gunfight but he got lucky. The gunshots had attracted a small herd of walkers that kept the violent group at bay, allowing him to escape by jumping through a window and rushing out the back door of a house. Carl’s reaction to his return had been unexpected.

_Rick touched the teen on the shoulder. “Carl, we can’t stay here.”_

_Carl moved his shoulder, shrugging his father off._

_There was a rustling in the bushes next to them. The sound of stumbling and laboured breathing. A walker. Rick reached for his revolver but realised Carl still had it. Michonne clutched her sword at the ready._

_“Carl, if it’s more than one we need the gun.” Rick tried to get his son to listen. “Carl!”_

_Carl glared at his father before standing up and grabbing the revolver from the back of his belt. He aimed it towards the bushes with two hands, the gun heavy in his hands since he was used to his Beretta. The stumbling and breathing got louder until the figure burst out of the bushes onto the train track. Carl dropped the gun to the ground. He couldn’t believe it. Standing in front of them with a cut on his cheek but otherwise unharmed and more importantly, alive, was Jason._

_Michonne lowered her sword and Rick smiled with relief. Carl collapsed to his knees from the shock of it. He couldn’t make sense of it. Jason was alive. He had taken on a group of armed men and somehow came out alive. Jason walked up to the boy and lowered himself down on one knee. Carl peered up at him from under his hat and openly accepted the hug Jason gave him. He could see the shock in the teen’s face and figured a hug was the best remedy._

One thing that Jason had become keenly aware of the more time he spent with Carl was their connection. They had formed an interesting bond and had done so surprisingly quickly, although they labelled themselves as friends, Jason always felt it ran deeper. He was in constant fear of making any moves to that effect in case Rick decided to slaughter him for it but it had been impossible to hide from Michonne. She was observant to the point of being spooky. She never missed a smile, an affectionate gesture, a comment, she saw and heard it all.

_Jason lay on his back, using his bag as a pillow as he stared up at the night sky through the branches, observing the stars. The nights were getting colder. Rick wore his bomber jacket, Michonne wore a dark yellow jacket and Jason wore his signature leather aviator jacket. Carl shivered. He was the only one without something warmer to wrap up in._

_Jason noticed Carl shiver out of the corner of his eye. Michonne was sharpening her sword and Rick was cleaning out the group’s guns. He sat up and unzipped his leather jacket, pulling it off before handing it to Carl. Carl looked back slightly confused._

_“Won’t you get cold without it?” Carl asked but took the jacket as Jason continued to force it into his hands._

_“I’ll be fine.” He answered. “We’ll find something for you in the morning.”_

_“Thanks.” Carl nodded and put the jacket on. It was too big for him but it was better that way as it covered more of his body and kept him warm._

_Jason lay back like before and continued to look at the stars. He felt the cool air chill his skin through his black shirt but he did his best to ignore it. One thing he didn’t mind about a world without electricity lighting everything up was being able to see the stars without any kind of light pollution. He smiled._

As time went on, their bond had strengthened and it was becoming clearer every day that there was something between them. Jason had soon reached the point where he wanted their bond to be more than just friendship, despite how scary that prospect was in the apocalyptic world ruled by death itself. He wanted to try but he had to pick his moment and only if Carl showed interest, which he inevitably did.

_An hour or so later and night had fallen upon them. Rick and Michonne sat outside by the camp fire while Jason sat in the car with Carl. Carl had found it cold and wanted to get comfortable before finally sleeping and Jason had offered to keep him company instead of leaving him on his own in the car. Jason sat in the driver’s seat with his arms folded._

_“Is loving someone worth it anymore?” Carl asked, yet another question that came out of nowhere._

_“What do you mean?” Jason asked, slightly stunned by the wording of the question._

_“Well, any one of us could die tomorrow or even tonight.” Carl explained himself, his tone depressingly low. “Won’t love just bring even more pain?”_

_Jason thought for a moment, looking ahead through the windscreen at the campfire. Carl did have a point but he couldn’t accept it to be true. There was always more than one way to look at things._

_“That’s true but it also makes love all the more special.” Jason answered._

_“Michonne told me that love is something you act on.” Carl told him, though his hesitant tone showed he still didn’t fully understand what that meant._

_“She’s right. The people you know could all die tomorrow.” Jason answered, placing a hand on the boy’s shoulder. “How you make them feel before their time comes is so, _so_  important for that very reason.”_

_“So you should love someone even if you don’t have long?” Carl asked, trying to understand Jason’s way of thinking._

_“Absolutely. I’d rather die having experienced love than died without ever knowing what it felt like.” Jason told him, rubbing his shoulder gently. “You should get some sleep.”_

_Carl closed his eyes and sighed. “I’m trying but I can’t relax enough.”_

_Jason moved his hand to the back of Carl’s neck, placing his fingers strongly against it. This earned a gasp from Carl._

_“Your hand is freezing!” Carl gasped out._

_“Yeah, but it will relax you. Hold still.” Jason told him._

_Jason kept his cold hand on the back of Carl’s neck and sure enough the teen began to relax. After a while he could tell Carl was asleep, the expression on his face having softened completely. Jason retracted his hand and quietly stepped out of the car. He put his hands in his jacket pockets and stared up at the stars and thought about his conversation with Carl. He felt it was a shame that Carl still hadn’t experienced the warmth that he himself had felt with Kellin. It was different to friendship or the love of family. It was so much stronger and more intense. He would give that gift; that experience to Carl if he could but it wasn’t his place and never would be. Jason continued to stare at the stars above, lost in his thoughts._

Upon reflection, Jason ruled that rushing back into the burning, walker swarmed Terminus had probably been a bad idea. In the grand scheme of things it had been foolish and stupid, but the sentimental value of his diary and photo of Kellin was too high. Losing that photo would have meant losing Kellin all over again, even if the act of getting it back had almost made Carl lose Jason himself.

_Abraham froze when a sound caught his ears. Everyone else could hear it and also froze. It sounded like someone walking over leaves, their pace uneven. The subtle clang of metal gun barrels banging together also sounded through the air and reached their ears. Someone was coming. Someone who was armed. Realising it could be the last of the Terminus members, they all pointed their guns at the top of the road and waited. The clanging got louder and louder as the individual approached._

_Finally the person walked over the ridge of the road. The clanging came from the bag of guns wrapped round their shoulder. Their hair was messy and their clothes were bloody. Their belt was tied round their left leg as a tourniquet, causing them to limp slightly. The group couldn’t believe it. Jason was alive and he had managed to find them. He raised his hands in a mock sign of surrender, given that all the guns were still aimed at him._

_Seeing excitement burst out of Carl, Michonne took hold of Judith. Carl charged forward towards Jason, an excited and relieved grin on his face before he hugged Jason with so much force that the young man fell on his back. He groaned as he hit the ground but wrapped his arms around Carl all the same. Carl was practically crying into his chest. The shock of losing Jason, reuniting with Judith and now with Jason was just too much for the fourteen year old to process emotionally. Jason didn’t remove his arms from around the teen, even under Rick’s gaze._

Out of all his times with Carl, the most precious memory he had of the boy was not their first meeting, nor was it their first sexual encounter. None of the sexual episodes, no matter how pleasurable, were as memorable to Jason as their first kiss. Their first kiss had signified the beginning of their relationship, the silent confession of their feelings and the agreement to be together, no matter the risks or difficulties. Jason had been unsure at the time but on reflection it was one of the most important and treasured moments of his life.

_Carl turned to look at him and realised their faces were quite close together as a result of examining the scars. Jason realised this too and smirked._

_“We’re kinda close.” He teased._

_Jason had meant it as a joke but Carl couldn’t help but blush at the comment. He knew he cared a lot about Jason. It was obvious to most of the group when they had believed him to be dead at Terminus. Michonne, as his most trusted friend, knew that Jason had become very important to Carl. He felt his heart pound in his chest. He wanted something but he wasn’t sure what it was._

_Jason noticed the blush and the slight change in Carl’s breathing. He was suddenly nervous and Jason couldn’t figure out why. Their faces were close together and he had made a light joke about it but now neither of them seemed to want to move._

_“What’s up?” Jason asks quietly, concerned for Carl._

_Carl stuttered, their eyes meeting. He could see the nervousness and pain inside those blue eyes._

_“I…I don’t know.” Carl answered. His face was still red and Jason’s questions weren’t helping._

_Jason moved his face a little closer to Carl’s. They could feel each other’s breath against their faces with how close they were. He was starting to piece it together._

_“Carl?” Jason whispered, not taking his eyes off the teen’s. “Do you _like_  me?”_

_Carl swallowed nervously as his blush intensified. His eyes darted between Jason’s eyes and Jason’s lips. He had never been this close to someone in his life. He had never felt this rush of adrenaline before, it was different from the adrenaline produced by fear or rage. It felt good. There was another feeling but Carl didn’t know how to describe it. Jason’s questioned returned to his mind, realising he awkwardly hadn’t answered it yet. It was an important question. Carl wasn’t sure what his answer was. He was feeling too many new and different things._

_“I…I don’t know.” Carl repeated, his face flaming up with embarrassment._

_Jason felt the very same adrenaline coursing through him. He had noticed how Carl’s eyes darted from his eyes to his lips, how he swallowed nervously and how red his face had turned. He recalled that Carl had never been intimate with anyone in his life. This situation was new to him and he didn’t know how to react. Although he said he didn’t know if he liked Jason or not, Jason took that as a positive reaction. He had to guide Carl through this. He had to make a decision._

_Carl’s eyes widened as Jason closed the gap between them. He felt warm lips on his own. They were soft and gentle. Nothing was forced. His heartbeat accelerated. This was what he had wanted. This was why he had got so nervous. The feeling he couldn’t describe was want. Desire. Jason pulled away slightly and gazed into Carl’s eyes, looking for any signs of rejection. He couldn’t find any._

_“Is this okay?” Jason asked, placing a hand gently on the back of Carl’s neck._

_Carl swallowed nervously again and nodded slowly. He wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do or what he was supposed to say._

_Jason closed the gap again, connecting their lips just as gently as before. Carl closed his eyes with Jason this time. Jason pulled him closer with the hand on the back of his neck, earning a quick gasp of surprise. Jason took that opportunity to slide his tongue gently into Carl’s mouth, exploring it and teasing Carl’s own tongue. Carl’s breathing intensified at this new, deeper kiss. He recognised it. He had seen members of the group kiss like this before but it felt totally different to how he expected it to. He liked it._

_Jason felt a mix of adrenaline and serenity course through him. He couldn’t believe he was kissing Carl or that the boy was allowing him to. At the same time it was relaxing as it was the first chance he had had to be close to someone since Kellin died._

Jason made a promise to himself in the speeding Chevrolet at that moment. He would survive and find his way back to Alexandria. Once he was there and had exacting his vengeance upon those in charge and those responsible for his present situation, he would thank Carl properly. Jason fully intended to sit Carl down and thank him for all the fond memories they now shared while also confessing to him about his mental health. He knew he was hallucinating and that would obviously fill Carl with worry, so perhaps Michonne was right and talking about it really would help. Jason was going to find out.

 

The bark of a dog made Carl jump reflexively in surprise. Before he could react, the chocolate Labrador, Brodie, came bounding up to him with his tongue flapping and tail wagging. Carl grinned as the dog reached him and petted him affectionately. Sometimes Carl wished he and Brodie could swap places, it would be a lot easier to just be a big happy ball of fluffy fun.

Brodie barked affectionately as Carl went down on one knee to continue rubbing his neck and patting his head, giggling when the dog nuzzled into his chest. When he looked up, he noticed Trisha emerging from the garage that was used for the classes in Alexandria.

“Hey, Carl.” She greeted warmly as she walked up to him, standing beside Brodie.

Carl stood back up to his full height. “Good morning.”

“What are you doing round here so early?” Trisha asked, petting Brodie. “Your classes with Jason aren’t until the afternoon.”

“It’s not that, I’m just looking for him.” Carl told her. “He wasn’t at home this morning so I thought maybe he’d be here.”

Trisha frowned slightly and shook her head. “Sorry, Carl. I haven’t seen him.”

“Okay, I’ll keep looking.” Carl replied, rubbing Brodie’s neck once more before turning to leave. “Thanks anyway.”

“If I see him I’ll tell him you’re looking for him.” Trisha called back.

“Thanks!” Carl answered as he headed further down the street.

Carl was feeling more and more confused the more time he spent searching for Jason in vain. The community of Alexandria wasn’t that big so there were a limited number of places he could be and Carl was running out of places to look. He stopped for a moment when he remembered Enid’s claims of Jason hallucinating outside the walls. He had completely forgotten to ask him about them. Carl looked around to check if anyone was watching him before he turned to the wall beside him and started to climb.

“What are you doing?” Michonne’s voice came out of nowhere, almost causing him to fall.

Carl froze on the spot, gripping the wall with white knuckles as he looked to his left where Michonne stood in her uniform. Her expression was not the friendliest one she had ever wore, she looked concerned and annoyed much like an angry mother.

“Enid told me Jason sometimes goes outside the walls.” Carl told her as he descended. “I wanted to check out there.”

“You were going to go out there alone and unarmed?” Michonne questioned him disapprovingly.

“I would have been fine.” Carl argued. “I can handle myself.”

“And what would I tell your dad if something happened?” Michonne asked him sternly. “What would I tell Jason?”

Carl lowered his gaze to the floor and felt his whole body shake with frustration. He remained like that until Michonne’s hand settled on his shoulder, prompting him to look up at the samurai.

“Let’s go find Daryl and ask him to take a look, okay?” Michonne suggested.

Carl’s face brightened up as he nodded, following the samurai to the solar panels where Daryl sat in the grass fixing his crossbow. Michonne and Daryl shared a look as they made their approach before Carl spoke up.

“We can’t find Jason.” Carl explained to the archer. “Can you check outside the walls in case he’s out there?”

Daryl studied the boy’s expression for a moment before nodding and standing up. “Sure.”

Carl smiled as Daryl agreed and slung his crossbow over his back. Michonne then turned to Carl with a soft smile.

“So we can get it done faster, I’ll go with him.” She told the teen.

“I could come too.” Carl offered.

Daryl shook his head. “Nah, best you stay in the house. When he comes back that’s where he’s gonna look for you.”

Carl considered this statement for a moment before nodding. He left Michonne and Daryl to head towards the gate while he himself headed back home. The wording of Daryl’s response didn’t sit well with him. The archer was often calm in the face of danger and suspicion but he had seemed unusually calm during that conversation.

Fifteen minutes later and Carl had collapsed back on the king sized bed he shared with Jason. He could still smell his lover’s scent in the sheets and smiled at the memories it brought him. He sighed and looked around the room in boredom. Carl had no idea what to do with himself until Jason returned, either on his own or brought back by Michonne and Daryl.

A part of Carl was worried that something terrible had happened to Jason but if that were the case someone would know about it. He would have been told long before now and he knew that. As his eyes scanned the room they settled on Jason’s bedside drawer where he spotted a small book next to the lamp. He recognised it instantly as Jason’s diary, which he knew the older teen wouldn’t leave out in the open. Carl rolled over and reached for the book, swiping it off the set of drawers before opening it and flicking through to the most recent page. Carl felt his blood run cold as he read the latest entry.

_I guess I was an idiot for letting Nicholas draw me into a fight. Then again, he is a cowardly, lying bastard who has no doubt twisted Deanna in his favour. So much for the spiel about me being a good man considering she no longer seems to believe that. These fools seriously expect their plan to exile me to work out. They are far too naïve to execute this whole thing properly which means I can find my way back. This might teach them an important lesson about survival and their decision making._   
_I have opted to not tell Carl about this whole ordeal as I know it would upset him. He’s finally happy here, happier than I’ve ever seen him and I don’t want to take that away from him. With any luck I can get back before he notices I’m gone, providing the others can distract him long enough._   
_Rick is furious and wants to take this place over because of this but I can’t let him do that just yet. That plan of action could ruin everything, so I’ll do it my way. I’ll come back and take care of all those who refuse to accept my relationship with Carl. I’ll kill Kevin, Nicholas and even Deanna if I have to._   
_A voice in the back of my head warns me that this could all go wrong. They could be very good at exiling people and I could be left in the middle of nowhere and totally disorientated. Daryl has that eventuality covered from what I’ve heard. The only other way this could go wrong is if something or someone kills me. If that happens, then at least I got to say goodbye to Carl this morning as he slept. This entry will be proof of Deanna’s guilt so the others can act and if it should be my final words, then I want Carl to know that I’ll always love him and that Kellin and I will be watching over him._

Carl felt his legs turn to jelly as his hands shook, eventually dropping the diary to the floor. Several feelings flooded through him. Hurt. Confusion. Betrayal. He couldn’t believe that his father hadn’t told him about any of this and he especially couldn’t believe Jason had kept it from him. Did the older teen not realise that he was the reason for Carl’s happiness and not Alexandria? Was this all part of his “good death” mantra that he had spoken to Carl about on the way to Terminus? The most important question burned into the front of Carl’s mind, was there still time to save Jason?

Carl felt determination course through his veins as he leapt to his feet. He grabbed his hat and strapped on his knife belt before rushing out the door. He charged down the stairs and shot through the front door faster than Carol could call to him from the kitchen. Carl started jogging along the street, searching for his father who was no doubt on his patrol. He was so caught up in his rapid thoughts that he turned a corner and slammed straight into his father’s chest, falling on his backside with a thud.

Rick reached down and helped him up. “Carl! You okay?”

Carl pulled his arm out of his father’s grip. “Why didn’t you tell me about Jason?”

Rick studied his son’s upset expression before lowering his head. “Jason thought he’d back sooner than this.”

“Why did you let him go?” Carl barked, his voice uneven.

“He wanted to go.” Rick told his frantic son. “He has some sort of plan.”

“I want him back!” Carl all but shouted.

“Go speak to Deanna.” Rick told his son sternly. “I’m going to speak to Daryl, Michonne and Carol.”

Carl nodded. He knew what his father had planned. If Deanna didn’t change her mind or have some way of getting Jason back then Rick was going to take action himself. He knew it would be messy but all Carl cared about in that moment was having Jason back with them, so he marched towards Deanna’s house.

 

The Chevrolet Suburban lurched as it came to a stop on a deserted patch of road. There were no cars, no animals and no walkers. No signs of life whatsoever. Kevin and Tony got out of the car. Tony opened the back passenger door, aiming his gun at Jason and beckoning him to step out of the car while Kevin rummaged around in the boot of the vehicle.

Jason stepped outside and wandered a few steps, looking around to try to gauge where they were. They hadn’t taken that many turns so for the most part it was a straight line back to Alexandria. A foolish and naïve decision on Kevin’s part. Jason would find his way back easily enough, it would just take longer than he had anticipated.

“So, this is where you plan to leave me?” Jason commented aloud. “Seems quiet enough.”

Tony remained perfectly silent, beads of sweat running down his forehead as he stared at Jason with an unnerving glare. His gun remained pointed at Jason though his hand was shaking.

“So, what’s the plan? Dump my stuff several feet away?” Jason continued calmly. “Leave my knife so I can cut through the tape?”

“No.” Kevin suddenly growled in response.

The unmistakable sound of a gun being cocked caught his ears and caused him to turn round. Jason froze when his eyes found Kevin. Kevin stood in front of him with a Benelli M4 shotgun aimed at him, a sinister smirk on his face. This had not been part of Jason’s plan. Regret flooded through him as he realised this was going to be the end of the line. With his hands taped together and without a weapon Jason knew he had no hope of defending himself.

“Tell me, is this Deanna’s plan or are you getting creative?” Jason questioned the grey haired man, maintaining a calm façade.

“I watched your tape.” Kevin barked. “I know you can survive out here so I’m not risking it!”

“I suppose it is the only way to keep me away from Carl.” Jason remarked dryly.

“The rest of your people will be back out here soon.” Kevin continued, stepping closer. “I’ll make sure of that!”

“Will you now?” Jason commented with raised eyebrows. “We’ll see about that.”

“You won’t.” Kevin growled, pressing the barrel of the shotgun against Jason’s forehead.

“Scared you’ll miss?” Jason quipped with a smirk, putting on his best brave face.

As Jason stood there with death staring him down, he silently apologised to Carl in his mind as everything seemed to slow down around him. It was as if the colour of the world had faded somewhat as Kevin and Tony remained completely motionless. Jason himself couldn’t move except for his eyes which scanned the area frantically as he tried to work out how to escape.

“Jason, you can’t give up now.” Kellin’s voice sounded from behind him as the blonde teen walked round to face him. “You’ve come too far to die now. Don’t give up, baby.”

“He’s right, you know.” William walked into view, looking at Kevin. “You’re stronger than this guy.”

“The right choice is the one that keeps you alive.” Shane reminded him, stepping in from behind William. “Don’t think. Act!”

“The only honourable way to die is to go down fighting.” Carlos’ Hispanic accent reached Jason’s ears as he too walked into view. “So stop standing and start fighting!”

“You promised to protect my boy.” Lori told him, her expression serious. “Don’t break that promise.”

“Heroes are weak and always die.” The Governor warned him, staring him down. “In this life, you kill or you die. Or you die and you kill.”

Jason reflected on his whole life. His childhood had been innocent enough apart from the violence of school bullies. His alcoholic uncle had been a saga he had eventually got over. His friends had been some of the best people he had ever met and being in a band with them had been exhilarating. Meeting Kellin had felt like a gift from God and had easily been the happiest two years of his life, despite the troubles of dealing with Kellin’s family and homophobia from others. The apocalypse had brought them closer together, even though he had lost his parents and Sam. He had protected Kellin from the scumbag in their camp, Taylor, before they had lost the leader, Carlos. They had lost so many people in the camp and then on that fateful night they lost the rest of it. Jason also lost Kellin that night. Somehow he had managed to survive on his own, having to directly kill two men and leave others for dead.

From that point on he had been completely alone, isolated from the human race and had felt like another walker. Just an empty shell. Then another metaphorical gift from God came in the form of Carl. Jason’s loneliness had compelled him to follow Rick and Carl and it had worked out far better than he could have ever hoped. After the chaos of Terminus and the church, he now had Carl as his boyfriend. Carl was his. They were happy together and they now had a place to live and be together happily. The only thing that stood in the way was the man with the shotgun in front of him.

Kevin pressed the barrel of the shotgun harder against Jason’s forehead, sweat trickling down his own forehead. Jason blinked some sweat out of his eye as he glared at the man in front of him. The transition had happened subconsciously, he had went from fearful to confident. Scared to angry. Jason growled at the older man.

“Any last words?” Kevin questioned sadistically.

Jason moved his arms as fast as he could, raising them up level with the shotgun before slamming them to the left, knocking the barrel away from his head in a movement which took Kevin by complete surprise. Kevin pulled the trigger on reflex, firing at nothing before dropping the weapon due to a mix of the odd angle and recoil. Jason’s ear rang loudly from the gunshot being so close to it but he did his best to ignore it.

Jason clasped his hands together and smacked Kevin in the face with a double fist. Kevin staggered so Jason struck him again, bringing him down on one knee. The younger man grabbed the older by the hair and kneed him forcefully in the face, bursting his nose open in a gush of blood before kicking him onto his back. Tony pulled his gun out in a blind panic but Jason delivered a powerful side kick to the black-clad man’s chest, breaking a rib and knocking him off balance. Tony fell back and knocked his head against the car door, falling unconscious.

Jason took the break in the action to raise his arms up above his head. He then slammed them down as fast as he could, pulling his arms to either side of his body in a sudden movement that snapped the duct tape with ease. He ripped off the remaining pieces before facing Kevin again. Jason quickly kicked the shotgun under the car before Kevin slammed into him, tackling him strongly and forcing him back against the side of the car. Jason kneed the man in the gut and slammed his elbow down on the back of the man’s neck.

Kevin was a larger, stronger man than Jason so the two blows had little effect. Kevin rose up to his full height and punched Jason strongly in the face, bursting his lip open again before grabbing a fistful of hair and slamming Jason headfirst through the car window, the glass shattering onto the seat inside and around their feet. Blood trickled down Jason’s head and cheeks from the shards of glass that had torn into him while blood trickled from his lip. Jason removed himself from the window and elbowed Kevin in the chin before receiving a punch to the gut that caused him to double over.

Kevin grabbed Jason’s shoulders to follow up his attack but was stopped when Jason delivered a powerful uppercut straight to the groin. Kevin howled in pain as Jason stood to his full height and punched the man repeatedly in the face but Kevin ducked the final punch. As soon as Jason’s arm swung past, Kevin stayed lowed and pushed Jason and crushed him against the car again. He then brought both hands up and clasped them tightly around Jason’s neck in an attempt to strangle the life out of him.

Jason raised his right arm up straight and brought it down across Kevin’s arms, immediately breaking his vice-like grip around Jason’s neck. Jason grabbed Kevin’s shirt and reeled him towards him to deliver a powerful head-butt to the man’s face. Kevin stumbled back so Jason charged forward, using all his power and weight to knock the man to the ground. The older man landed on his back with a thud with Jason on top of him, his hands around the man’s neck.

Kevin raised his own hands up and tried to gouge out Jason’s eyes, his hands grabbing at his face while his thumbs searched for the eye sockets. Jason kept trying to wriggle his face away from the man’s shovel-like hands but it wasn’t easy when he was trying to strangle the man at the same time. Kevin brought his leg up and smashed his knee into Jason’s groin, causing the teen to howl in pain and let go of his neck.

The grey haired man took the opportunity to roll them over so he was on top of the younger man. They had rolled over onto the glass shards by the car and now his hands were around Jason’s neck yet again. This time Jason couldn’t break the hold and started gasping for air, desperately looking around for something he could use before he started to suffocate. His hand found a rock so he quickly brought it up and smashed it against Kevin’s temple, knocking the man off of him and onto more glass shards.

As Jason scrambled back on top of the man he grabbed a large glass shard from the ground, thankful that his gloves were on to avoid his hand being cut by it. While the slightly dazed Kevin stared up at him, wide-eyed with absolute terror, Jason rammed the glass shard into the older man’s jugular before slashing it side to sit to open up his throat completely. Blood gushed out like a fountain, most of it landing on the ground, Kevin’s chest and Jason’s jacket. Kevin gargled a few times before the life seeped from his body and he lay dead beneath the bruised and bleeding Jason.

Jason heard the click of a gun and looked up. Standing a few feet in front of him was Tony who was shaking with fear. He held his Sig-Sauer P230 in his trembling hand as Jason dropped the glass shard and slowly raised his hands. There was no way he could close the distance between them faster than Tony could pull the trigger.

“Get off him!” Tony shrieked.

Jason did as he was told, slowly standing up and moving away from Kevin’s body. He knew it was only a matter of time before he reanimated but there was no way to tell just how long. Tony kept the gun on him until Jason stood a few feet from the front of the car. Tony opened the driver’s side door and held his gun out in the gap between the door and the side of the car.

“I should kill you where you stand!” Tony bellowed in terror. “But I’m gonna let the dead have you!”

Tony raised his arm and fired his gun several times into the air, the gunshots echoing around them and no doubt attracting nearby walkers to the location. Jason continued to glare at him but by this point had lowered his arms to his sides. Jason took a step forward and in a panicked movement, Tony brought the gun back down and pulled the trigger. There was a loud click as the gun jammed. The two men stared each other down.

“Don’t even think of finding your way back!” Tony threatened as he hid behind the open car door. “I’ll tell Deanna what happened here!”

As Tony was about to get in the car, Jason finally spoke.

“No, you won’t.” Jason rasped, his voice hoarse from being choked.

Tony stared at him in confusion. Jason reached into his inside jacket pocket and pulled out his Taurus PT-909. Jason quickly shot at Tony through the window of the open door, the glass shattering as three bullets shot through it and into Tony’s chest. The man let out a shriek of pain before collapsing back onto the road, convulsing in pain as blood poured out of his back and onto the tarmac. Jason marched over to him and glared down at the dying man before firing a final shot into his heart.

Jason went back round the other side of the car and checked Kevin’s body. There were no signs of animation so he bent down and reached underneath for the shotgun. Once he retrieved it he quickly made his way back round to the driver’s side and tossed the shotgun into the front passenger seat. Jason then grabbed his knife belt and gun holster from the car’s dashboard and put them on. He could hear the rasps, snarls and growls of approaching walkers and decided to waste no more time. He got into the driver’s seat and slammed the door behind him before gunning the engine and driving off, leaving Kevin and Tony to reanimate as the walkers closed in.

Jason quickly turned the car around and drove past the two dead men yet again just in time to see Kevin’s body twitching back to life. The car sped past them and back down the main road they had driven down to get there. Jason kept his foot on the accelerator as he planned out what he needed to do. He almost died back there and it was Nicholas and Deanna’s fault. Jason would return to Alexandria and exact revenge on both of them, the first being Deanna. The petite and naïve leader would die. She would pay for this, just as Jason had promised her the day before.

 

Rick checked his watch and sighed as he looked over at the main gate of Alexandria. Carol was beside him, her body language was timid and her face was calm and friendly. She had to keep up her appearance as a little house wife and not the dangerous member of the group that she was.

“Something’s not right.” Rick commented. “They should have been back by now.”

“Maybe they ran into a herd.” Carol suggested.

Rick shook his head. “They didn’t blindfold him. Something’s not right.”

“What do you wanna do?” Carol asked him. “Now that Carl knows, things could get messy.”

“When they get back, Daryl can find out where they took him.” Rick explained. “Then he can go out and get him back while we deal with Deanna.”

“Are you sure now’s the best time?” Carol asked, questioning Rick to make him think more.

Rick nodded. “If something has happened then that’s on me. I let him go.”

“Jason said he had a plan.” Carol reminded him. “He wanted to do this.”

“I still let him go.” Rick retorted. “Carl won’t let that go.”

The two of them shared a look. Carol could see the guilt and anger on Rick’s face despite the man’s best efforts to hide it. Things within the community would have to change drastically if they were going to stay there and this incident with Jason could be the catalyst.

 

Jason killed the engine of the car and got out, keeping the keys in his pocket. He left the shotgun in the front seat where he could get to it if he had to return to the vehicle in a hurry. The rustle of leaves and a chorus of snarls signalled the approach of the walker. The rotting corpse of an older man stumbled towards the teen before receiving a knife blade to the forehead. Jason whipped the blade out and stepped over the body as he made his way towards Alexandria.

He had parked the Chevrolet just off the main road where the woodland would obscure the vehicle from view. He decided to walk the rest of the way so he could sneak back in undetected. Using his memory, Jason figured out which wall was closest to Deanna’s house and mentally set it as his destination. He was going to make her pay for almost having him killed.

Another walker lurched towards him with stiff, cold and rotting hands but Jason’s knife swiftly ended its existence. Jason growled under his breath in irritation at the walker’s presence. He had no time to waste with brainless corpses. He had to deal with Deanna and he had to deal with her right away. Jason reached the wall and started to climb, peeking his head over the top to look for any signs of people. No one was around to spot him entering the community so he lifted himself over the edge and climbed down onto ground level.

Jason kept himself low down as he made his way towards Deanna’s house, sticking to the shadows, vegetation and walls to reduce the chances of being spotted. Once he reached the window of her living room where the interviews had taken place, he climbed up and opened the window. Just as he had expected, the windows weren’t locked so the window opened without difficulty allowing him to slip himself inside the house.

As he took a breath to prepare himself for the confrontation he was about to face, he heard a furious, uneven yet instantly familiar voice. It was Carl’s voice. Deanna’s voice could also be heard from the other room and by the sounds of things they were coming down the hallway towards the front room.

“How could you do that? I thought this was a community!” Carl bellowed angrily. “You didn’t ask us what we thought, you didn’t ask anyone!”

“Carl, I did what had to be done.” Deanna tried to calmly reason with him. “He was a danger to this community and he couldn’t stay.”

“Kevin and Nicholas were dangers to Jason!” Carl countered quickly. “They’re the threat, not Jason!”

“Carl, I’m going to have to ask you to leave now.” Deanna replied sternly. “Come back when you’ve calmed down.”

“Or what?” Carl spat back with uncharacteristic venom.

Deanna remained silent as she stared at the young teen in front of her, unsure of what to say without making herself seem even more of a villain.

“Or what, Deanna?” Jason decided to speak up and alert both of them to his presence in the front room.

Deanna and Carl both froze on the spot momentarily when they spotted Jason. In the middle of Deanna’s spotless front room stood the older teen they had been arguing about. His hair was dishevelled with large chunks stuck together with dried blood. His face was covered in blood, some of it leaking from cuts on his face and head while the rest was dried blood splatters. The front of his jacket was also covered in dried blood and his jeans were filthy.

“Jason!” Carl cried out excitedly and ran over to his older lover, pulling him into a tight hug.

Jason hugged him back and rested his cheek on the top of Carl’s head. He felt some tension leave him just from being back in Carl’s embrace. He had almost died and he couldn’t believe he had almost accepted his fate. It felt amazing to be back with Carl.

“It’s okay, I’m okay.” Jason told him, rubbing his back.

“You don’t look okay.” Carl commented, taking a step back.

“Flesh wounds.” Jason remarked before turning serious. “Go find your Dad and tell him I’m back. I need to speak with Deanna.”

Carl didn’t question Jason for a change and did as he was told. He squeezed past Deanna who was still frozen in the doorway before heading out onto the street in search of Rick. Once he was gone, Jason turned his full attention to Deanna before pulling his Springfield Armory TRP Operator handgun out of his thigh holster and aiming it at the small woman.

“Sit down.” Jason ordered. “We need to talk.”

“Jason, put the gun down.” Deanna responded with a shaky voice as she made her way to the sofa. “You don’t need it in here.”

“I’ll be the judge of that.” Jason retorted and sat down on the chair opposite her.

“Where are Kevin and Tony?” Deanna asked, not losing all of her confidence despite having a gun in her face.

“Dead. Just like I would have been.” Jason told her bluntly. “Did you tell them to kill me or was that just them?”

A wave of shock rushed over Deanna’s face at the statement. Jason’s bloody appearance made a lot more sense now that he had told her it had been an attempted execution instead of an exile.

“We don’t kill people here.” Deanna told him. “I just wanted you to be sent away.”

“Well, Kevin, you know, the homophobic bastard who attacked me and Carl?” Jason replied angrily. “He had different plans. He tried to blow my head off with a shotgun.”

“So you killed them.” Deanna filled in the gaps. “What did Tony do?”

“Tony would have killed me had his gun not jammed.” Jason explained with a sadistic smirk. “My lucky day, I guess.”

“Jason, what are you planning to do?” Deanna questioned him as calmly as she could. “Are you going to shoot me?”

Jason flicked the safety back on. “Actually, since you didn’t order my execution, I’m willing to make you a deal.”

“I’m listening.” Deanna responded, feeling slightly more relaxed.

“How many people have you told about this?” Jason questioned her with narrowed eyes.

“My husband, Reg and Maggie.” Deanna replied. “The only other people who know are your people.”

Jason nodded in thought. “I doubt your people would be happy to know you kept this from them. You did say you were all about transparency.”

Deanna nodded but didn’t say anything.

“So, here’s the deal. You let me stay and I’ll agree to tell the story of a supply run gone bad.” Jason declared. “Refuse to let me stay, and everyone will know that two of your people were killed because of your secret decisions.”

“So you’re resorting to blackmail?” Deanna questioned cynically.

“I’m offering you an easy way out.” Jason barked. “I could resort to bullets if you’d prefer.”

Deanna glared at him for the remark. “How do I know you won’t go back on your word?”

Jason thought for a moment. It was a good question. “So long as no one and nothing tries to forcefully come between me and Carl, you’ll have nothing to fear.”

Deanna narrowed her eyes at his answer.

“I want to live here. It’s safe and Carl’s the happiest I’ve seen him.” Jason told her. “I’ll fight to my dying breath to preserve that, so it’s best to stay on my good side.”

Deanna waited a few moments before she finally responded. “How do we tell the story?”

“I’ll slip back out the walls and return in the car.” Jason told her. “From there, we’ll act it all out.”

“How do you know everyone will believe you?” Deanna questioned as Jason stood up.

“I can be a very convincing liar when I need to be.” Jason commented as he holstered his gun and slipped back out the window.

Deanna stared at the window before resting her head in her hands, her body shaking from nerves and fear after being held at gunpoint by an angry and bloody Jason.

 

Jason had stayed true to his word. He appeared at the gates ten minutes later in the Chevrolet and feigned the grief of having lost Kevin and Tony during a run. He explained to everyone that a large herd had caught them off guard and the two men had been bitten before he could do anything. Jason lamented with perfect emotion that all he could do was run away. The only consolation he could offer was that he shot both men in the head so that they wouldn’t turn.

Once he was away from the Alexandria residents and back in the main house with the others, he told them the true story. He explained that his plan had been to find his way back and prove to Deanna that exile was pointless. Unfortunately, Kevin had other plans and Jason had barely survived the ordeal. It became clear to the group that they couldn’t work in fragmented pieces for anything. They would need to stick together and no longer be divided.

Rick and Carol both knew that this wasn’t a promise they could necessarily adhere to. Their plan for a coup was still in the works and the incident with Jason had simply strengthened their resolve to go ahead with it. They knew they would need to wait a few days so that the excitement around Jason had died down. They would find the perfect moment to strike. They would make the community safe.

After putting his clothes in for a wash and getting a shower, Jason sat on the edge of the bed with Carl. He kept his gaze focused on the floor as he sighed and tried to relax himself. He felt so guilty for having nearly died without saying a proper goodbye to Carl, who he knew had read his diary entry.

“Carl, I’m sorry for not being completely honest with you.” Jason apologised sincerely to his younger lover.

“You should be.” Carl replied sharply.

Jason nodded. “I was trying to protect you. I know it was wrong but I did it with the best intentions.”

“I’m not a kid, you can be honest with me.” Carl told his older lover. “You can tell me things.”

“Yeah, which is why I’m starting now.” Jason replied and paused to collect himself. “Recently I’ve been hallucinating. I see people who I’ve lost and even some that you’ve lost.”

Carl remained silent as Jason confessed to his hallucinations.

“They tell me things but I’m only interested in Kellin.” Jason continued. “I keep seeing him and I need to know why.”

Carl continued to remain silent, letting Jason speak his mind without interruption.

“I’m sorry for being an embarrassment. I should be taking care of you.” Jason finished with a shaky breath. “I’ll understand if you don’t want to be with a lunatic.”

Suddenly, Jason felt Carl’s lips over his own, silencing him. They stayed like that for a few moments in gentle lip lock. There was nothing passionate or special about it, it was just a simple yet loving kiss between them. Carl finally pulled away.

“You’re not a lunatic. My dad went through the same thing at the prison.” Carl told Jason. “And we take care of each other. I’m not leaving you, ever.”

Jason’s lip quivered as tears stung the corners of his eyes. He wrapped his arms around the younger teen and pulled him in for a tight hug. Carl reciprocated the hug instantly as Jason’s body shook as he started to cry softly. All the fear, frustration and anger that had been bottled up was coming out in the form of tears.

“I promise to never lie to you or leave you ever again.” Jason told his boyfriend. “I’m putting things right. I love you, Carl and I’m never letting anything come between us again.”

 

**So there we have it. Chapter 21 is finally complete. Again, I’m not sure how I feel about this one, it feels rushed and a bit off to me. So if it is then I apologise, the next 3 chapters will be much better. I hope you all enjoyed Jason’s fight to the death, as I enjoyed writing that part and it is one of my favourite scenes so far in this fanfiction actually.**

**This chapter has a couple little Easter Eggs hidden in it, so I’m curious to see if anyone noticed them. Though they are very obscure. Also, the duct tape breakout trick is real and does work, in case anyone was wondering.**

**The song Jason sings to Carl is “Shed Some Light” by Shinedown.**

**I hope I’m still keeping everyone in character and am demonstrating Jason’s character flaws and mental health issues well. Let me know in your reviews/comments if that is or isn’t the case.**

**Despite the promises made at the end of the chapter by Jason; there is more trouble ahead for our favourite couple. Especially as we move in to Season 6 where I predict Jason’s whole world is going to fall apart.**

**Also, someone who I will not name, has claimed this story is a rip-off of This Cruel Reality. That’s pretty interesting considering I haven’t ever read that story, so any similarities are coincidental or a result of the same basic concept. I’m pretty sure my storyline and character of Jason are totally different to that story.  
As for this story being “less awesome.” Well, it takes a lot to make me cry. I’m always open to constructive criticism though.**

**Who’s enjoying Fear The Walking Dead? I am, and it has been giving me lots of inspiration for Jason’s prequel story. I’m also super pumped for Season 6 ^^**

**As usual, let me know what you think in your reviews/comments.**

**Thanks for all the favourites/follows/votes/kudos/subscriptions.**

**Thanks to the reviewers of chapter 20: MagnificentFern, The Sorrowful Deity, jar98, Sarah_94, The_Man_Called_Madara, super fan, and leylinjan.**


	22. Sombre

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group continues to become a bigger part of the community of Alexandria. With tensions brewing, Jason decides to make good on his promise and dedicate more time to Carl.

Rick leaned against the perimeter wall with his hands in the pockets of his windbreaker. He watched as Daryl loaded up his crossbow and made sure he had everything he needed. He would soon be leaving with Aaron to scout for more survivors to bring back to the community so he had to be ready for anything. Walkers were a constant threat, especially herds and people were an even bigger threat.

“Just so you know, after what happened with Jason we may need to take this place while you’re gone.” Rick told the archer. “You okay with that?”

“You said we should give them a chance.” Daryl reminded the constable.

“That was before they almost killed one of our own.” Rick retorted sternly.

“Do what you gotta do.” Daryl replied, zipping up his leather jacket. “Whatever happens, I’ve got your back.”

Rick nodded. He knew he could always count on Daryl for support. “Be careful out there.”

Daryl nodded before heading over to his bike to give it a check-up before the trip. It would be difficult to repair out on the road if something went wrong. Rick left his friend to it and continued his patrol of the community.

 

_Jason inserted the red key into the lock and turned it, unlocking the thick wooden door he was standing in front of. He turned to Kellin with a grin and nodded his head in the direction of the door as he turned the handle and opened it. Kellin excitedly entered the large wooden house while Jason followed behind, closing the door behind him and pocketing the key._

_“Are you sure it’s okay to bring me in here?” Kellin questioned, slightly nervous._

_Jason nodded. “Of course it is.”_

_Kellin stared back at his boyfriend, subconsciously admiring his smile as he consciously worried about negative consequences. He was broken from his thoughts when Jason skipped a step to close the distance between them and give him a peck on the lips._

_“I promise, poppet.” Jason assured him, earning a smile from his blonde lover._

_Jason flicked the light switch on and led him over to a metal gate with a padlock on it. He took out a silver key and unlocked the padlock, hanging it on the metal rails of the gate before opening the gate and stepping inside. Kellin nervously followed him inside, feeling something soft under his feet which he realised was hay._

_“Close the gate and stay there, okay?” Jason instructed his lover._

_Kellin nodded and shut the gate behind him, pushing the latch through the slot to keep it shut. He turned back to watch Jason open the gate of the dividing fence in the middle of the room before making an odd noise with his mouth. Suddenly, a similar but stronger sound answered Jason’s call followed by a high pitched roar. Jason smiled up at Kellin as three small tiger cubs stepped into their side of the room, still a little clumsy on their feet._

_Kellin dropped to his knees in awe at the cute little orange balls of fluff that were wandering around curiously. Their black stripes were deeply pronounced against their brighter fur and white underside. The little cubs either let out soft but high pitched cries or made similar sounds to the one Jason made. One of the cubs spotted Kellin and froze in place for a moment, its bright blue eyes unwavering as they studied the blonde teen._

_To Kellin’s amazement, the little cub started to waddle towards him. He was unsure of what to do so he lowered his body so that he was lying on his side and held out one of his hands tentatively as the tiger cub approached. The cub sniffed at his hand before biting it gently, which didn’t hurt Kellin but did make him giggle joyfully._

_Jason had the other two cubs biting and pawing at his arms as he played with them, making the same noise as before between giggles and praises. The cubs were little bundles of fun but as the playtime went on they started getting louder, constantly letting out high pitched growls and roars as they pawed at the two boys._

_“Their mother fell seriously ill just after having them.” Jason explained between the cute roars. “She came to us pregnant so we decided to let her have the cubs.”_

_Kellin listened intently while two of the cubs started climbing all over him, making it impossible for him to remove the grin from his face. They were the most adorable little things he had ever encountered._

_“So, since she can’t look after them, we’ve decided to step in.” Jason explained. “And I’m one of their official surrogate mothers.”_

_“Aww, they’re your babies.” Kellin stated teasingly. He didn’t say it but he found the idea of Jason and babies alluring._

_Jason nodded. “Yep, the two that were playing with me first are girls, Meera and Tierras.”_

_Kellin nodded and then cast his gaze to the blue eyed cub that had singled him out. “And this one?”_

_“We haven’t named him yet.” Jason replied. “But if you can come up with a name, then you can have the honour of naming him.”_

_Kellin’s eyes shot open in surprise. “Seriously?”_

_Jason nodded as his shirt got pulled on by baby Meera. “Seriously.”_

_Kellin thought for a moment as he stroked and played with the little male tiger cub. He had such dazzling blue eyes and the cutest little roar that Kellin had ever heard. After a few moments of silence from Kellin, he finally made his decision._

_“Logan.” Kellin announced. “After my cousin.”_

_Jason grinned. “Logan it is then.”_

_They both grinned as the tiger cub in question curled into Kellin’s lap, starting to get tired from all the playtime he was having._

_“He really likes you.” Jason commented, scooting closer to his boyfriend._

_“Yeah, he does.” Kellin agreed with a nod as he petted the cub._

_“Not as much as I do though.” Jason affirmed with a flirtatious smirk._

_Kellin raised his eyebrows. “You sure about that?”_

_“Pretty sure.” Jason answered and closed the gap between them to capture Kellin’s lips in a loving kiss._

The first rays of sunlight streamed in through the window and stroked Jason’s face, rousing him from his sleep. He opened his eyes and groaned lowly, rolling over onto his side to check on Carl who was still sound asleep beside him. Carl’s hair was a mess from the night’s sleep which got Jason thinking that his younger lover really ought to get a haircut. Jason smirked to himself and decided to slip out of bed for his morning run.

As he quietly pulled on his running clothes, a thin black long sleeved top and some black joggers, Jason had the incredible urge to just wrap his arms around Carl’s sleeping form. He fought the urge as he knew it would wake the boy and after tying the laces of his shoes, he slipped out of the room to start his run. The house was quiet as the others slept, though he knew a couple of the group members would already be awake, such as Rick and Michonne.

Jason slipped out of the house through the front door and started his run. He missed having a portable music player to motivate him to run every morning but he was a creature of habit so the lack of such a device didn’t break his routine. For Jason, running was an invigorating way to start the day and he loved the fresh morning breeze on his face as he ran round the perimeter of Alexandria. His sides, legs, fists, face and head all ached from the recent fights he had been in but he did his best to ignore the pain. The injuries were a small price to pay for being back in the community with Carl.

Jason knew things had to change in the community. After killing Kevin and Tony and then threatening Deanna at gunpoint he knew the situation was a ticking time bomb. Deanna’s patience would run out or she would get over her fear. Either way, she would soon become a problem for Jason again and if that happened he was prepared to deal with her in the most violent way necessary. As he ran, he watched as Daryl drove out of the main gate on his motorcycle, followed by Aaron in Eric’s red Buick Car Sedan. Both of them quickly disappeared beyond the gate as Spencer closed it.

Jason felt slightly nervous about the day ahead as he knew he needed to talk to Carl about various things. He had a bad track record of lying to his younger lover and he had to put an end to it by apologising and vowing not to repeat his mistakes. He was going to take the day to just be Carl’s boyfriend, nothing more and nothing less. He wasn’t going to concern himself with anything else but Carl for the whole day because Carl was long overdue such attention.

With his leg muscles burning and his sides aching from a mix of his injuries and a stitch, Jason slowed himself down to a walking pace. As he continued walking he looked around, bringing himself out of his thoughts momentarily to observe his surroundings. As he did, he caught Father Gabriel standing by the entrance to a large garage that had become Alexandria’s makeshift church. The priest glared at him as he approached, provoking Jason to return the glare just as fiercely.

“Take a picture if you enjoy staring that much.” Jason commented as he reached the man.

“I prefer to not have pictures of demons.” Gabriel commented with a sardonic smile.

Jason smirked in amusement. “So, I’m a demon, am I?”

Gabriel didn’t respond, he simply continued to glare at the younger man. Jason stepped forward so that he was within striking distance, this appeared to make Gabriel slightly nervous.

“So tell me then, Father.” Jason commented with a sarcastic tone that turned dark. “What does that make you? You left your flock to die, so don’t talk to me about sin.”

“God will punish me for my sins.” Gabriel responded with a nervous swallow. “Just as he will punish you for destroying Carl’s innocence.”

“Let me make this clear. You do not question my relationship. You do not preach to me about your imaginary friend.” Jason warned Gabriel, eyes narrowed, almost growling. “You will not put Carl or Judith in danger again like back at the church because if you do I’ll feed you to the dead or put a bullet between your eyes, understood?”

Gabriel nodded nervously before Jason backed off and continued his walk. His stitch had gone away and he had recovered his breath so he could finish his morning run. As he was about to leave, he glanced to his right when movement out of the corner of his eye caught his attention.

Glenn, Nicholas, Aiden, Tara, Noah and Eugene were grouped around a white van that had been stored in one of the garages. Deanna, Maggie and Reg looked on as the group prepared for their run. Eugene pulled out a rectangular black device from his bag as Noah handed him a Heckler & Koch P2000 with a silencer attached.

“Oh, no thank you.” Eugene shook his head.

“Just take it.” Nicholas told him as he walked past towards the van.

“Come on, you gotta protect yourself.” Noah argued.

“Not if I don’t go.” Eugene retorted with a dismissive shake of his head.

“We’re not driving all that way just to drive back with the wrong shit.” Aiden argued.

Eugene held up the device. “It’s a dozen of these, they are consistent in appearance across manufacturers. The shit will be right. I will install said shit and then the grid will be fully operational again.”

Noah slotted the gun into a leg holster and handed it to Eugene, gently slamming it against his chest so the taller man would grab it. Noah then grabbed his bag and headed for the van with Tara who sparked conversation.

“Heard you talking to Holly last night, what’s her story?” She asked seemingly innocently.

 “Why do you ask?” Noah responded as they put the bags in the back of the van.

“No reason.” Tara replied with a playful grin.

Noah made an affirmative hum before walking away from her to get more bags and weapons. Tara followed closely behind him.

“It was an innocent question, don’t make me hurt you.” Tara warned jokingly as she jumped on his back.

“First aid kits, yellow pages, Glenn made a check-list so we’re good, I swear.” Aiden told his parents.

“I know, I’m just a worrier, that’s how that wall wound up around us.” Reg replied.

Aiden sniggered before leaning in to kiss his mother’s cheek.

“Love you.” Deanna told her son as he pulled away.

“Take care, Dad.” Aiden said with a smile.

“I’m supposed to be saying that to you.” Reg responded as his son headed for the van.

Glenn checked the garage. “This everything? Alright.”

He turned to his wife who stood by the garage door.

“You got this.” Maggie said to him with a smile. “You always do.”

“Yeah.” Glenn almost whispered before leaning in for a farewell kiss.

As Glenn headed for the van, Reg shrugged his shoulders as he spoke his thoughts aloud.

“Well, the power grid was a prototype.” He explained. “I’m surprised it took this long to start acting up.”

“We’ll get it going.” Glenn assured them with a smile.

“Daylight’s burning, let’s go!” Aiden called, tapping the side of the van before stepping in the driver’s seat.

“I know I said it before but thank you.” Deanna told Glenn, referencing how he knocked Aiden off his arrogant perch.

Glenn nodded with an awkward smile. “Yeah.”

Deanna smiled back as the Asian man made his way to the van and got in. The other doors closed and Aiden started the engine with the van roaring to life as Maggie, Reg and Deanna watched. Music started sounding loudly from inside the van as Aiden started one of his mixtapes.

Jason cringed from afar when he heard the music. What kind of idiot went driving out in a world ruled by walkers while blaring loud music? Did that young man want to be driving a dinner bell? Jason shook his head at the constant lack of survival sense the members of the community displayed before continuing his morning run.

The van drove out of the community while Reg waved to Gabriel. Gabriel responded with a solemn nod, still feeling mentally beaten and emotionally bruised by Jason’s vicious verbal assault only moments before. Something would have to be done to obtain peace in the community and it was up to him to make it happen.

 

Rick leaned against the support pillar in the middle of the room while Carol worked away in the kitchen. Most of the others were at work, except for Carl who was still upstairs asleep alone due to Jason going on a run. The older teen being out of the house worked for Rick and Carol as it allowed them to discuss what had happened the previous day.

“Do you think they believe the story he told?” Rick asked the older woman.

“Of course they do.” Carol answered. “They don’t know what it’s like out there. They’re too naïve to not believe him.”

“We shouldn’t have let him go.” Rick commented. “We should have taken this place.”

“We will but only when the time is right.” Carol answered. “Doing anything now would be too obvious.”

“They need to change.” Rick thought aloud. “Their luck is going to run out one day.”

“Try talking to Deanna again.” Carol suggested as she closed the oven door. “Changing them peacefully will save ammo.”

Before Rick could respond, the front door swung open as Jason returned from his run. His shirt was damp with sweat and his hair was messy from the wind and sweat that had attacked it. He nodded to both Rick and Carol, instantly detecting the atmosphere in the room that told him he had walked in on a serious conversation. Without a word he walked past them and headed up the stairs.

When Jason reached the room he shared with Carl, he closed the door behind him and locked it. He knew they wouldn’t be disturbed but old habits always died hard. He could see that Carl was already stirring and starting to waken, so he quickly pulled off his shirt and tossed it into a corner of the room. Jason then sat down on their bed and played gently with Carl’s hair, an action that gently roused the boy into the land of the woken.

“Morning.” Carl greeted groggily.

“Morning.” Jason answered, kissing Carl’s forehead.

When Jason kissed Carl’s forehead, his necklace bumped against Carl’s nose as it hung from his neck. This evoked a soft giggle out of Carl who sat up properly, staring at Jason’s necklace. Jason smiled and reached out to take hold of Carl’s necklace, both of the teens reflecting on the meaning of the necklaces and the day Jason revealed them.

_A small distance away from the rest of the group, Jason and Carl sat together. Jason had deliberately led them away for a while and Carl was curious to find out why. Jason reached into his pocket and pulled out two necklaces that he had taken from the Terminus store room. Each one of the necklaces was one half of the Chinese Yin-Yang symbol. Jason handed Carl the Yang necklace._

_“These symbols mean different things. This one stands for light, for goodness.” Jason explained as he placed it in Carl’s hand. “You are my light in this dark world.”_

_“What does your one mean?” Carl asked with interest._

_“Mine stands for darkness and submission.” Jason explained. “It will symbolise my inner pain and that I trust you with my heart.”_

_Carl couldn’t help but smile as he put the necklace on and concealed it under his shirt just as Jason did with his own. This was one of the most unique and meaningful gifts he had ever been given in his life and certainly since the apocalypse had started. It was a hidden, physical symbol of their relationship._

Carl smiled at the memory as he stared at Jason’s necklace. Neither of them had taken their necklaces off since that night at the church. Carl’s eyes glanced over Jason’s naked torso, taking in the details of it. He had seen it before but sometimes he couldn’t help but stop and stare. Smooth skin, abs that rippled under the surface, bruising from his recent fights and the scar from the night he was stabbed.

Jason would have caught him staring but he was too busy doing the same with Carl’s body. When the teen had sat up, the covers had slipped down to his waist to reveal his torso. Tanned forearms, biceps that were starting to tone up from all the walker killing and a slim, pale expanse of smooth skin that covered his chest and stomach. Jason licked his lips and took a breath, reminding himself just how lucky he was.

“I love you, Carl.” Jason finally spoke, bringing his eyes up to meet his boyfriend’s. “I feel I don’t say it nearly enough.”

“I love you too.” Carl replied and leaned in for a kiss.

Jason responded by also leaning in and capturing Carl’s lips with his own. He brought one of his hands up to gently grasp the back of Carl’s neck, pulling him closer to deepen the kiss while his other hand rested on Carl’s lower side. Carl wrapped one arm around Jason’s neck and rested the other on Jason’s thigh.

They broke apart for a quick breath before locking their lips together yet again, their tongues battling one another. They pulled each other closer as Jason’s hand slipped down to Carl’s waist, rubbing against the waistband of his boxers. Carl’s hand moved up Jason’s thigh and stopped as he felt that Jason was half-hard under the fabric of his joggers.

“Shower?” Carl suggested, gasping between kisses as Jason’s hand found its way to his own hardness.

Jason hummed an agreement and stood up, gently pulling Carl out of bed and onto his feet. He guided the younger lad into the en-suite bathroom before kissing and nibbling at Carl’s neck. Carl groaned as his hands struggled to undo the knot in Jason’s joggers before pushing them off. The older teen locked the bathroom door before kissing Carl’s neck again, his hands moving round and slipping off the younger teen’s boxers before grasping his backside in his large hands.

Carl managed to take some control of his body so that he could push down Jason’s boxers before returning his arms to round Jason’s neck. Carl leaned into Jason’s loving assault on the crook of his neck as the older teen walked them over and into the shower. Without removing his mouth from Carl’s skin, Jason managed to turn the shower on and close the door behind them as the warm water cascaded around them and on top of them.

As the water cascaded down them, Jason kissed his way down Carl’s now wet body, paying special attention to his nipples. Carl gasped as Jason licked at the small nubs, smiling against Carl’s chest as his hands rubbed the younger’s hips. He descended further down until he was level with Carl’s ardent need. Jason looked up at Carl and gave him a cheeky smirk before taking Carl’s member into his mouth. Carl’s head fell back as he closed his eyes from the pleasure of Jason’s warm mouth enveloping him.

Jason moaned contently around Carl’s throbbing manhood as he took more of it into his mouth. He loved to please Carl and it excited him just how responsive Carl was during their sexual experiences. Carl’s hands found Jason’s wet hair and started running his fingers through it while Jason bobbed his head back and forth along the shaft. Every time Jason bobbed forward he took a little more of Carl into his mouth.

Carl couldn’t help but moan loudly above his older lover, the warm, wet sensation of Jason’s mouth and tongue pleasuring him far too strong for him to keep quiet. Carl continued to play with Jason’s hair as he tentatively thrust his hips back and forth, being careful not to choke or hurt Jason in any way. In response to Carl’s thrusts, Jason kept half of the shaft in his mouth and took the bottom half in his fist and started stroking it.

As Carl’s moans grew louder, Jason’s movements became faster with his mouth closing around the shaft even tighter than before. Jason knew that Carl was close, his manhood was throbbing constantly and Jason could taste precum dripping from the tip which he quickly lapped up with his tongue. Carl’s eyes were squeezed shut, his head was against the wall, his hands gripping Jason’s hair in his fists and his hips bucking as he cried out and released into Jason’s awaiting mouth.

Jason raised himself back up to his full height as he swallowed down Carl’s offering before he kissed the younger teen. Carl was breathless and struggling to stay standing, an after effect of his orgasm which Jason took pride and amusement in. Once Carl had calmed himself down he gently pushed Jason against the shower wall before lowering himself to his knees. Jason didn’t bother arguing, he knew it was what Carl wanted to do. Any other thoughts he had disappeared when he felt the familiar sensation of Carl’s mouth around him, his head falling back and his eyes closing in pleasure.

 

Jason poured the coffee grains into the mug before sticking it into the holder on the coffeemaker. Since their arrival to Alexandria, this simple machine had become his favourite resident of the community. It was simple, knew what it had to do and brightened up his mornings with a hot and tasty cup of coffee. He flicked the switch and opened the cupboards to get two bowls for the cereal he and Carl were going to eat.

Carl was still upstairs and was sitting on the roof of the house in agreement with Jason’s request. They had spent their first day together on the roof of a house looking out onto a street, so Jason wanted to make that a tradition. He wanted it to be yet another symbol of their relationship.

Jason sighed as he glanced back at the coffeemaker and realised that it had failed him. There would be no coffee made by the machine as the power appeared to be out. The supply run preparations he had seen during his run now made sense, they were looking for things to fix the power supply. He grabbed a pot and filled it with water before placing it on the stove, thankful that it was gas powered, and started boiling the water. Jason had a feeling that it was going to be one of those days in which nothing went quite right.

Once the water was boiled he poured it into the cups and placed them on a tray along with the bowls of cereal. He carefully made his way back up the stairs and into the bedroom, placing the tray on the bedside table while he climbed out the window to join Carl. Once there, he brought the tray out onto the roof along with them, smiling to Carl as he did so. Carl grabbed his cup and bowl from the tray and sat with his back against the bedroom wall, his legs stretched out in front of him. Jason sat next to him with his legs crossed.

“Sorry it took longer.” Jason commented. “Power seems to be on the blink.”

“It’s fine.” Carl replied with a short chuckle. “I’m kinda used to not having power anyway.”

Jason let out a matching chuckle. “Well, that’s true.”

For a few minutes nothing was said between them. The only sounds were the soft crunches as they each chewed on their cereal before swallowing it down. They were content to be in each other’s company as they watched the sunrise and listened to the birds’ morning chorus. Around them, Alexandria started to wake up with more and more noises and people being heard and seen. There was something relaxing about watching the community come to life around them.

Once they had finished eating their cereal, they sat together drinking their morning coffee. Carl felt a little nervous as he sat there with the older teen as he knew they needed to have a proper discussion about everything. He wasn’t sure how his boyfriend would react to the upcoming interrogation but Carl reminded himself that Jason had promised to be honest from this point on.

“What happened with Nicholas?” Carl asked, releasing a breath at the end of the question. It was time.

Jason sighed and put down his cup. “He thinks I’m a paedophile, someone who preys on children. So he decided to tell Mikey to stay away from me.”

“But you’re not.” Carl quickly contested the accusation.

Jason nodded. “He disagrees. Mikey punched me when I went round to talk to him so I pinned him against the wall to calm him down. That’s when Nicholas came in and attacked me.”

Carl was silent while he listened intently.

“I don’t remember much of the fight, to be honest. All I remember is that I was sick of his threats and his bigotry.” Jason continued, clenching his fist. “I wanted him dead so I tried to kill him. That’s when Daryl pulled me off the curly haired bastard.”

“Killing him would have been too far.” Carl responded. “He doesn’t deserve it.”

Jason shook his head. “People like him, vindictive cowards, get people killed these days.”

“The people here are just weak.” Carl defended. “They just don’t know what it’s like out there. That’s why the need us.”

“It’s the weak ones that make mistakes.” Jason argued. “I’ve seen it so many times. I’ve lost friends because of people like that.”

“Then we need to tell them.” Carl replied confidently. Jason’s anger didn’t intimidate him.

“Tell them what?” Jason questioned with raised eyebrows.

“How to survive.” Carl answered. “Isn’t that what you’ve been doing as a teacher?”

Jason sighed and nodded in defeat. “Yeah, yeah it is. The adults will be harder to teach though.”

“But they can still learn.” Carl pressed.

“Let’s just hope they learn fast.” Jason remarked with a sigh.

He took a moment to lift his cup and drink some more of his coffee, his eyes scanning the street below them as the residents went about their morning routines. Carl decided to do the same, wanting to move on and change the subject of conversation.

“What exactly did you do to Kevin and Tony?” Carl asked, curiosity getting the better of him.

“They tried to kill me, so they deserved to die.” Jason stated with a shrug. “I slit Kevin’s throat with some glass and I shot Tony in the heart.”

“Then in the head, right?” Carl asked, assuming that Jason had prevented their reanimation.

Jason shook his head. “They didn’t deserve any favours. They’re out there walking about without a soul now. Not that they had one to begin with.”

Carl grimaced. He hadn’t expected Jason to be as horrible as that towards anyone, even if the two men had tried to kill him. Carl was learning that there was a much darker streak to Jason than the bright, loving persona he would put on for Carl. It reminded Carl of their conversation outside of Terminus.

_“I see how you’ve been looking at your dad. You don’t have to be afraid of me.” Michonne told him. “Or him. Or Jason. We’re family.”_

_Carl fought to keep his emotions in check, to stop the tears from falling. Michonne had successfully broken down his barriers._

_“He told me the other day that he was proud of me. That I was a good man.” Carl told her in a solemn whisper. “I’m not. I know more now. About what he wanted from me. And I tried but…”_

_Carl felt the grief and guilt wrapping round him, clutching at his heart like a vice._

_“I still have these thoughts. I’m not what he thinks I am.” Carl shook his head as the tears began to show themselves. “I’m just another monster too.”_

_Michonne hugged Carl softly. Now she understood what had been bothering him. It was only as she looked over Carl’s hat did she spot him. Jason stood behind Carl, leaning his arm against a tree._

_“Carl. You’re not a monster.” Jason told him, causing the boy to break the hug and turn round. “Monsters don’t have a conscience. Those men back there? They were monsters.”_

_Jason walked up to him and stared into the boy’s eyes._

_“The fact that you are so upset shows you are not a monster.” Jason continued. “You are a good man. So is your dad.”_

_“But what my dad did last night. I wanted to do that and more.” Carl retorted, tears rolling down his cheeks. “How can I be a good man and have those thoughts?”_

_“Because even the best people have to do the most brutal things to survive.” Jason answered, placing his hands on Carl’s shoulders and rubbing them softly._

_“If you kill to protect. You’re not a monster.” Jason continued._

Reflecting on that conversation and the things Jason had done since made him realise something important. Carl realised that as awful as those things were, they had all been done for the right reasons. Jason may have claimed to leave them to turn out of revenge but in reality it had been because they tried to take him from Carl. Jason had promised to always take care of him and anyone who got in the way of that would meet the monster inside him. Carl knew Jason still had a conscience. He wasn’t a monster.

“You should have told me about your exile.” Carl scolded him. Waking up without Jason there had almost killed him inside.

“I was just trying to protect you.” Jason answered hesitantly.

“But you didn’t.” Carl retorted. “You just made it worse.”

“That wasn’t my intention.” Jason tried to defend himself. He knew that he deserved Carl’s anger.

“Your intention was to lie to me.” Carl continued his verbal attack. “Same way you lied about the hallucinations! You needed help and you didn’t let me help you!”

Jason sighed. “I didn’t want to drag you down with my problems. You finally seemed happy here, relaxed. I didn’t want to take that from you so soon.”

“I’m not made of glass, Jason.” Carl spat back, his frustration finally bubbling to the surface. “I can handle bad news. I’ve been handling it this whole time!”

Jason remained silent, allowing Carl the opportunity to vent and voice all his pent-up frustration and anger.

“You’re the one who tells people that I should be treated like an adult. You tell people what I’ve been through and how that makes me mature and strong.” Carl continued his attack. “But then you can’t even trust me with your health. You treat me like a kid even though we’re together and we’re together because I’m _not_ a kid!”

Jason sighed and lowered his head into one of his hands, rubbing his forehead as he nodded slowly. Carl was absolutely right, Jason had been an utter hypocrite regardless of his intentions. All his efforts to justify his relationship with Carl using the younger teen’s maturity were rendered pitiful when compared to his own treatment of him. He was so concerned with protecting Carl that he had done more harm than good.

“You’re right, Carl. You’re absolutely right and I’m so sorry.” Jason finally spoke, slowly raising his head so he could look at his angry lover. “All of that is going to change from now on, I promise. I don’t break my promises either.”

“Do you really promise to stop lying to me?” Carl asked, his expression stern.

Jason nodded. “Yes. If I break that promise, you have the right to tell your dad that I hurt you.”

“Okay.” Carl thought for a moment. “You know what hurt the most?”

Jason stared back at him with narrowed eyes and a slightly tilted head. “What?”

“Hearing about your hallucinations from Enid first instead of you.” Carl explained. “She saw you out in the woods one morning.”

Jason closed his eyes with guilt and nodded. “Yeah, she warned me about a walker. I couldn’t see it.”

The two of them fell silent for a moment with neither teen knowing what to say to the other. The silence gave Jason time to think about his mistakes but it also reminded him of his reservations towards Enid.

“What’s going on with Enid?” Jason asked abruptly, emotions getting the better of him.

“What do you mean?” Carl asked, somewhat perplexed.

“She’s so cold to everyone yet you and her seem to talk a lot.” Jason explained, trying to avoid his real reason for asking.

“She’s like us. She isn’t weak.” Carl defended her before narrowing his eyes. “Am I not allowed to talk to her?”

“I didn’t say that.” Jason retorted quickly. “Of course you can talk to her.”

“Then what’s your problem with her?” Carl asked, annoyed.

“I don’t trust her, okay?” Jason answered sharply. “Something about her makes me uncomfortable.”

“Because she talks to me?” Carl questioned him. “Or because I talk to her?”

“Neither of those things.” Jason replied with an exasperated sigh. “It’s just a feeling.”

“Ron and Enid are together, okay?” Carl informed the older teen, smirking. “So stop being jealous.”

“I’m not jealous.” Jason spluttered out with a snort of disbelief.

“Yes, you are.” Carl affirmed, smiling. “And you’re not allowed to be.”

Jason raised an eyebrow and laughed. “Oh I’m not allowed, eh? Why’s that?”

“Because I have to listen to the girls in the class drooling over you.” Carl retorted.

This provoked a genuine laugh from Jason. It wasn’t something that had gone completely unnoticed by him though he did his best to ignore it. As they laughed, Jason pulled Carl against him with his arm and rested his head against Carl’s.

“Love you.” Jason murmured as they stared out at the community.

“Love you too.” Carl responded with a smile, taking Jason’s hand in his own.

 

A clang from Jessie’s garage got Rick’s attention as he walked up the back street. Jessie stood in the middle of the garage sorting through a pile of metal plates and other odd metallic objects.

“Hey.” Rick greeted.

“Hey.” Jessie greeted cheerfully, picking up a small metal pipe.

“What happened?” Rick asked, curious.

“I don’t know.” Jessie sighed. “Maybe somebody doesn’t like owls?”

Rick stepped into the garage, now realising that the pile of scrap metal on the floor was what was left of the owl sculpture Jessie had been making. It was the very same one that Rick himself had broken on his first day in Alexandria, the only difference is that time had been accidental and this time looked deliberate.

“Someone came in here and did this?” Rick asked to confirm as he approached her.

Jessie shrugged, a metal panel in her hand as Rick crouched down to observe the damage done to the owl sculpture. There wasn’t much evidence to work with but whoever had broken it had done so intentionally judging by the damage caused.

“Stuff like this never happens here.” Jessie commented with a shake of her head.

“You got any enemies?” Rick asked, smirking in amusement at how ridiculous the question sounded.

Jessie grinned and shook her head, bending down to pick up more of the debris.

“You know anybody who hates owls?” Rick continued, earning a laugh out of the blonde woman.

Jessie shook her head again as Rick stood back up to his full height.

“Too bad there isn’t anyone who could look into this kinda thing.” Rick commented sarcastically, earning a grin in response. “I’ll ask around.”

“No, you don’t have to.” Jessie replied with a shake of her head, not wanting to waste Rick’s time.

“No, I know.” Rick responded, making it clear he was choosing to look into it.

Jessie sighed. “So, you find the person who did this and then what?”

“Some kind of consequences.” Rick replied authoritatively, his old self coming out. “You ever heard about the broken window theory?”

Jessie shook her head.

“Well, it boils down to this.” Rick explained. “You keep the windows intact, you keep society intact.”

Jessie nodded and continued to grin. “This was an owl, Rick.”

“Yeah.” Rick nodded. “I gotta do something today.”

With that said, they shared a nod before Rick turned on his heels and left the garage. He was now on a mission to find the person who broke the owl sculpture.

 

As they sat cuddling on the roof, Jason and Carl spotted Jessie’s youngest son, Sam, walking down the street towards their house. The young boy looked up at them and waved to them as they waved back with friendly smiles. Once he walked up onto the porch and disappeared from view, Jason thought about potential problems in the future and how to be prepared for them.

“Hey, Carl?” Jason spoke up to get the younger teen’s attention.

Carl hummed in response to indicate that he was listening.

“Since Michonne is busy on patrol and Daryl is out recruiting with Aaron I was wondering if you’d like me to teach you how to fight.” Jason offered with a smile, pulling away from the hug to see Carl’s reaction.

“What do you mean, how to fight?” Carl questioned, unsure of what he could be taught.

“Well, how to protect yourself. How to escape when someone grabs you or ties you up.” Jason explained. “And where the best places to hit someone are in a fight and how to hit them.”

“You can teach me that stuff?” Carl asked, not knowing that Jason had plenty of experience.

Jason nodded quickly. “That’s how I survived my attempted execution. My Dad made me take self-defence classes when I was younger. It never goes away.”

Carl nodded. “I’d like that.”

Jason grinned. “Okay then, we could start now if you like. Unless you have plans?”

Carl giggled at the idea of already having plans. “We can start, but before that can you sing another song? I like listening to you.”

Jason beamed at Carl and nodded. “Sure, let me just grab my guitar.”

Jason quickly got up from his cross-legged position on the roof and climbed back into their room through the open window. He made his way over to the set of drawers where the guitar was kept and picked it up before taking it back outside with him.

Carl watched his every move excitedly as the older teen sat back down with the guitar in his lap. Jason checked that the guitar was still tuned properly before thinking of a song to play. He knew many songs but he wanted to sing something meaningful and not too loud so as to not be a disturbance to the community. Eventually he settled on a song.

“This one is dedicated to my grandfather.” Jason told his excited lover. “He was the toughest, wisest man I have ever known.”

Carl nodded in understanding and sat in silence as he waited for Jason to begin. He loved spending time like this because he didn’t need to worry about survival or walkers or death. It was just him and Jason and some music.

Jason started strumming on his guitar, making sure he remembered all the lyrics to the song he was about to sing. It was a very meaningful song to him and it was one that he didn’t need to sing too loudly nor play the guitar too loudly for it to still hit home hard. He quickly glanced up at Carl who was waiting patiently for him to begin.

“Two packs of cigarettes a day, the strongest whiskey Kentucky can make.” Jason started singing softly. “That's a recipe to put a vagabond on his hands and knees.”

Jason closed his eyes as he thought about his grandfather.

“I watched it all up close, I knew him more than most, I saw a side of him he never showed.” Jason sang with his eyes closed, lowering his voice a little. “Full of sympathy for a world that wouldn't let him be.”

“That's the man he was.” Jason looked up at Carl, his expression stern as he thought about the man. “Have you heard enough?”

Jason started strumming his guitar louder, reaching the chorus of the song which filled him with energy as he reflected on his grandfather’s life.

“What a shame! What a shame to judge a life that you can't change” Jason sang strongly. “The choir sings, the church bells ring. So, won't you give this man his wings?”

Carl sat back, captivated by the lyrics of the song which were deep like the last song Jason had sang for him.

“What a shame to have to beg you to see we're not all the same!” Jason sang, slowing his strums as he ended the chorus. “What a shame.”

Jason strummed slowly and kept his voice deep and lower than usual as he continued the song.

“There's a hard life for every silver spoon, there's a touch of grey for every shade of blue.” Jason sang slowly. “That's the way that I see life, if there was nothing wrong, then there'd be nothing right.”

Jason closed his eyes as he reflected on how his grandfather’s health had withered away yet the man had never given up. He always fought against all the hardships in his life and always tried to be independent.

“And for this working man they say could barely stand there's gotta be a better place to land.” Jason sang lowly. “Some kind of remedy for a world that wouldn't let him be.”

Jason looked up and was stern again but the corner of his mouth twisted into a smirk at Carl’s expression of enjoyment.

“That's the man he was.” Jason sang. “Have you heard enough?”

Jason strummed loudly again and raised his voice as he reached the chorus once again.

“What a shame! What a shame to judge a life that you can't change.” Jason sang loudly, his eyes closed as he tilted his head back, his fingers strumming the chords. “The choir sings, the church bells ring. So, won't you give this man his wings?”

Carl continued to grin as he listened to Jason perform. As he moved his head slightly, he noticed that a couple people were standing in the street listening to him. His father was one of them.

“What a shame to have to beg you to see we're not all the same!” Jason sang strongly, not slowing down like before. “What a shame!”

Carl returned his full attention to his older lover who sat across from him with the guitar while he sang his heart out.

“God forgive the hands that laid you down. They never knew how much a broken heart can break the sound and change the season!” Jason sang loudly, struggling for breath slightly. “Now the leaves are falling faster, happily ever after. You gave me hope through your endeavours and now you will live forever!”

Jason held the last note of the word forever before descending back into the chorus with a smile.

“What a shame! What a shame to judge a life that you can't change.” Jason sang, staring into Carl’s eyes. “The choir sings, the church bells ring. So, won't you give this man his wings?”

Carl smiled back, despite all the issues they had to work through he was forever proud to call Jason his boyfriend.

“What a shame to have to beg you to see we're not all the same!” Jason sang loudly as the song came to an end. “What a shame! What a shame! 'Cause we're not all the same! What a shame! What a shame! 'Cause we're not all the same!”

Jason finished playing the guitar, softly playing for a few more moments before stopping and gently slapping the base of the guitar.

“How was that?” Jason asked, unsure of how well he had performed such a meaningful song.

“It was beautiful.” Carl complimented with a grin. “Just like all the other times.”

Jason grinned as he gently put the guitar down. “Thanks.”

“It’s a beautiful song with a beautiful meaning.” Carol’s voice sounded from the window.

Carl and Jason jumped at the sudden voice and turned their heads to the older woman who stood on the other side of the window. She had a small smile on her face as she stared at them with her piercing gaze, letting them see her nicer side that she reserved for those she trusted.

“Yeah, that’s why it’s one of my favourites.” Jason explained. “My favourite band were the ones who wrote it.”

“What was your grandfather like?” Carl asked, only have vague recollections of his own grandparents.

Jason thought for a moment, smiling at the man’s memory despite the slight pang of pain it also brought. He wished that his grandfather could have been around during the apocalypse to help guide him. He always did know what to do in every situation, it was clear to Jason where his father’s own wisdom came from.

“He only stood about five foot four but when he walked into a room, he was a tower. Just this solid pillar of strength, cunning and wisdom with a fantastic sense of humour.” Jason explained with a fond smile. “Everyone that knew him would all say the same thing about him; that he was loyal, he didn’t lie, he didn’t steal, he didn’t cheat and he was faithful to his friends and his family.”

Carl could see in Jason’s face how important his grandfather had been to him and the picture that Jason’s words were painting was that of a very special individual.

“He had been a soldier but I don’t think he ever really stopped. He acted like he was still at war, he never left anyone behind and always made sure everyone was covered. That’s the word he would always use, covered.” Jason continued fondly. “He was open minded and would always listen to you, it didn’t matter what you had to say. He would listen. When he knew he was right he couldn’t be told otherwise.”

“He sounds amazing.” Carl commented with a hum of agreement from Carol. “What happened to him?”

Jason lowered his gaze for a moment. “He died just before all this started. It had been a very long fight but he eventually lost the battle with cancer.”

“I’m sorry.” Carl commented quickly, respecting the man’s memory.

“Don’t be, it was his time. I’ve never believed in a God but if there is one, he sure as hell tried his hardest to kill that old man.” Jason commented with a laugh. “Shot six times during the war, survived two heart attacks, had to have one of his kidneys removed before ending up with lung cancer. If that didn’t get him, then the aneurism growing inside him was going to kill him within twenty years.”

Carl hesitantly laughed along with Jason. He found it odd to be laughing at the suffering of someone that ended with their eventual death.

“I remember him saying that actually. He said he was disappointed with God if that was the best he could do.” Jason continued, still grinning with fond amusement. “He was a warrior to the bitter end. I miss him, I miss him a lot. I sometimes wish he could have been here through all this because he would have known what to do.”

Carl and Carol respectfully fell silent at this confession. They knew the laughter and the fondness couldn’t last forever when talking about a much loved family member who had passed away.

“But even though he’s gone, I still feel him within me.” Jason confessed seriously and calmly. “I can feel his strength inside of me every day that I’m here. It helps to remind me that sometimes you must go through hell for things to work out in the end.”

Jason and Carl’s eyes met as Jason smiled in fond reflection and acceptance over how the world was. Without any sort of prompting, Carl closed the distance between them and wrapped his arms around Jason’s body, pulling him into a tight, loving hug. Jason returned the hug with earnest and closed his eyes, basking in the sensation of Carl’s body so close to his own.

Carol decided to leave them alone and quietly backed away from the window before leaving the bedroom. Carol paused as she descended the staircase. She could hear odd, muffled sounds coming from just below in the hallway. She peeked round the corner and noticed the cupboard door was ajar, so she descended the stairs quickly and whipped it open, ready for a fight. Behind the door, rather anticlimactically, was Jessie’s youngest son, Sam.

“What are you doing in here?” Carol hissed, grabbing the boy by his arm and pulling him out.

“I didn’t tell anybody about the guns, I swear to God.” Sam replied, referring to Carol’s robbery of the armoury which he witnessed.

“Answer my question.” Carol hissed again, ignoring him.

“Do you have any more cookies?” Sam asked innocently. “The ones you made for the party?”

“They’re gone. Now go, go home.” Carol told him, pushing him towards the front door.

“My house doesn’t have power.” Sam argued. “I was going to paint my owl statue but somebody broke it.”

“None of these are problems, Sam.” Carol retorted in irritation. “I don’t care about your house, I don’t care about your statue. Now get out.”

Carol pushed him towards the door again as the boy sighed while she reached for the door handle.

“Can you make more cookies?” Sam asked.

“No.” Carol spat back and opened the front door.

“Why not?” Sam responded.

“Because I don’t want to.” Carol replied, pushing him out onto the porch.

“Maybe if you showed me how to make them I could do it myself.” Sam suggested.

“You want cookies?” Carol asked, thinking hard. The boy nodded his head. “Then you’re gonna have to steal the chocolate from Olivia and you’re gonna get an extra bar for me. If you get caught or say anything you’re not gonna like what happens to you, now go!”

Carol pushed him further out onto the porch and slammed the door behind him.

 

Jason and Carl stood outside the back of the house. The pathway that went past the various garages was one of the quietest parts of the community and gave them enough space to practice the martial arts that Jason had promised to teach his younger lover.

“Okay, Carl, there’s a few things that I need to explain to you before we start.” Jason told him, momentarily becoming a teacher again in terms of his voice and body language.

Carl nodded. He was ready for what Jason had to teach him, just as he had been with Michonne and Daryl in the past.

“First rule about any fight is that there are no rules. There’s no honour, respect or dignity.” Jason explained. “There’s just victory and defeat, so you want to make sure you’re the one who wins every time.”

Carl nodded, this was something he already knew but he let Jason continue uninterrupted.

“Expanding on that, anything in your surroundings can be used as a weapon. Absolutely anything.” Jason explained. “Of course, some things make better weapons than others. If you feel a fight is going to start, you should be looking for potential weapons around you.”

Carl nodded again and started scanning the area with his eyes, spotting most of the potential weapons to be in the garage. The garage was a gold mine of weapons for a fist fight.

“Keeping these things in mind, you can either incapacitate your opponent or kill them. That choice is yours.” Jason continued. “However, given the way the world is these days it will probably be a fight to the death.”

Jason grimaced at the idea of Carl in such a fight. “For that reason, you won’t have much time to think so your moves need to be reflexive. You shouldn’t need to think about how to do anything, you should just be doing them.”

“How do I learn that?” Carl asked, a little confused at the idea of learning without thinking.

“Well, we’ll practice until it becomes muscle memory.” Jason replied. “The same happened when you learned to shoot, it was tricky at first and now you don’t need to think, right?”

Carl nodded in agreement, this was very true. He hadn’t been aware of how quickly shooting a gun had become second nature to him.

“So the same will happen with these moves I’m going to teach you.” Jason continued. “These moves are for defence only. Once you know them I’ll explain how to have a decent offense.”

Jason spread his legs apart slightly so he was standing in a more balanced, controlled stance in front of Carl as he prepared to start the practical side of the lesson. He decided he would limit the first lesson to only a few things and build them from there.

“Okay, first trick you’re going to learn is something we call the Finger Dart.” Jason explained. “All you need to do is rush towards me threateningly.”

Carl hesitated for a moment before doing what he was told. He marched towards Jason with clenched fists, unsure of what to do when he reached him. The moment he got close, Jason’s arm suddenly shot out towards him, his fingers stretched out in his open hand mere inches away from Carl’s face. Carl stopped and leaned back to avoid the fingers out of pure reflex.

“That was the Finger Dart.” Jason explained with a laugh. “You use it to stall your opponent because their natural reflexes kick in, they can’t help but try to avoid it.”

“I noticed.” Carl commented with a laugh.

“Your turn.” Jason told him before marching forward quickly.

Carl quickly thrust his arm up with his stretched out fingers and smiled when Jason also stopped on the spot. Jason smiled back. It was a simple move but Carl was proving to be a fast learner yet again.

“It can be followed up with a punch or kick or anything really.” Jason explained before deciding to move on to the next technique. “The next little trick stops someone from choking you.”

Carl nodded, ready to be taught the next technique.

“I want you to wrap your hands round my throat.” Jason told him. “Try to choke me. Don’t worry, you won’t.”

Carl seemed hesitant about attempting to harm his lover but he trusted Jason and did as he was told. He raised his arms and wrapped his hands around Jason’s throat, his thumbs pressed against his Adam’s apple in an attempt to choke him. Jason smirked before raising his right arm up straight before bringing it down across his front to the left. The movement instantly broke Carl’s grip on his throat and pushed Carl’s arms to the right, leaving him exposed.

“Super simple move again and it doesn’t really require any strength to do it.” Jason explained as he stepped back for a moment.

“Really?” Carl questioned, finding it hard to believe that breaking someone’s tight grip would require such little strength.

“Really.” Jason answered before smiling. “Here, I’ll show you.”

Jason quickly stepped forward again and wrapped his hands around Carl’s neck tightly. He held Carl’s throat tightly enough that it would be very uncomfortable but not tight enough to cause him any harm. Carl hesitated for a moment before copying what Jason had done. He raised his arm up straight and then brought it across his front to his left. He was amazed as he felt Jason’s grip on his throat disappear as the older teen’s arms were pushed to the side as if they were nothing.

“See?” Jason questioned the smiling teen. “Really simple and again leaves an opening for you to attack.”

Jason could tell Carl was getting more and more excited and into the defence lessons. The techniques were simple yet effective, showing that Carl’s age and smaller stature were not limiting factors for the moves to be effective.

“For this next one I want you to grab my neck with one hand as if you’re trying to hold me there so you can punch me.” Jason requested.

Carl did as instructed, grabbing the corner of Jason’s neck with one of his hands while raising his other arm as if he was about to punch him. Jason nodded to assure him that he was in the right position. Jason then used his right hand to grab the inside of Carl’s hand before pulling it away from him, using his other hand to secure Carl’s elbow. With one quick movement, Jason forced Carl to double over with his arm outstretched and in Jason’s complete control. Carl tried to escape it but found he couldn’t, as any movements he made either hurt or were overpowered by Jason.

“Now, from here, I can do what I like.” Jason explained, lifting his leg in mock kicks that never made contact. “I can kick you in the face or the chest as many times as I like.”

Jason then lifted his left leg and placed it on Carl’s triceps while gently pulling up his forearm before letting go.

“And had I continued that, I would have broken the arm.” Jason finished as Carl rubbed the pain out of his arm. “Think you can give that a try?”

Carl nodded. He was slightly hesitant again as this new technique seemed to be a little trickier than the previous ones. He wasn’t the kind to back down from anything though, so he waited for Jason to grab his neck. When Jason did, Carl carefully grabbed his hand and pushed his arm over, securing his elbow in the same way Jason had done. He had taken his time as he knew this was one technique that would require a little more practice to get perfect.

“Very good.” Jason commented as Carl released him. “I have one more move for today.”

Carl nodded and waited patiently for the instruction or explanation. He was finding the whole experience to be very educational and discovering that Jason was an excellent teacher.

“For this one, I want you to try and bring a right hook to my face.” Jason told him. “You can do it slow or fast, I don’t mind.”

“Are you sure?” Carl asked, concerned. “I don’t wanna hurt you.”

“You won’t.” Jason replied, winking. “Trust me.”

Carl shrugged in acceptance and decided to test Jason’s trust. He suddenly swung his fastest right hook at the older teen and was shocked when Jason’s arm shot up and clashed against his own, blocking the punch and halting the attack. Jason smirked to him and then wrapped his arm over Carl’s upper arm, locking him in place before bringing his free arm back for a strike. Jason thrust his right arm forward as if to punch Carl in the face but stopped short and simply pinched his nose with a laugh.

“Your turn.” Jason told the younger teen as he released his arm with a grin. “We’ll go slowly for this one.”

Carl prepared himself as Jason swung his arm round slowly in a right hook. Carl raised his arm up and blocked the swing just as Jason had. He paused and looked at Jason with slight confusion as the older teen’s movements had been too fast for him to completely remember.

“Take the arm you’re blocking with and wrap it over and under my arm.” Jason instructed him with a smile.

Carl nodded and did as he was told, succeeding in locking Jason’s arm in place before copying Jason’s previous antics. He pulled back his fist before thrusting forward to poke Jason’s nose with his finger, provoking a giggle out of both of them.

Once they had released each other from the arm lock they couldn’t stop smiling at each other. The seriousness of the lesson wasn’t lost but they were enjoying each other’s company too much to be stern and cold.

“Final few things for today are offensive basics.” Jason explained while rubbing his hands. “These defensive techniques will be useless if you don’t know how to fight back.”

Carl listened intently and without a word.

“So, the first thing is the punch. There are different kinds of punches, hooks, uppercuts and such.” Jason explained before punching the air in front of him with a single lineal strike. “However, the best punch travels in a straight line and has your weight behind it. You step forward with the punch for added power.”

Carl nodded, trying it himself and repeating the movement well enough for Jason to move on to the next tip.

“The other classic is the kick to the balls.” Jason continued. “The only thing that should stop your kick from moving forward is their balls. Also, try and hit them with your shin instead of your foot for added damage.”

Jason quickly demonstrated the basic kick to the groin that was one of the most common fighting moves in existence. It was one he had used multiple times and had been hit by an almost equal number of times.

“Final bit of advice is where to hit. In a fight, there won’t be many openings to hit your opponent so you need to make each one count.” Jason explained. “Best places are the eyes, the head, the throat, organs such as the liver and kidneys and of course, the groin. Focus on hitting these areas as hard as you can.”

Carl nodded. “Okay, got it.”

Jason smiled and ruffled his hair before kissing his forehead. “Good. Now how about we chill by the lake?”

Carl grinned and nodded. He liked the idea of just relaxing by the water on the grass. No fighting, no killing, no conflict, just him and his boyfriend enjoying their time together.

 

Rick answered the knock on the door to reveal the tall figure of Pete. By his eyes and the smell of his breath, Rick could tell the man was drunk. It didn’t leave a good impression, considering he was the community’s doctor and it was early afternoon.

“Hey Rick, I was having a beer and thought I’d bring you one for helping my wife today.” Pete told him as he stepped inside, brandishing the bottle.

“I’m good but thanks.” Rick replied with a smile and a nod.

“Come on, don’t tell me you’re still on duty.” Pete argued.

Rick thought for a moment. “Well, kinda always am, you know?”

Pete sniggered. “Not at Deanna’s party. I saw you.”

Rick stared at the taller man as he leaned against the support beam. Anxiety shot through him at the idea of Pete having spotted Rick kissing Jessie. He hoped that wasn’t the case but prepared himself for a fight.

“You had some, right?” Pete finished, lifting the two beer bottles.

Rick felt relief wash over him as he smiled. “You know, I wish I could’ve helped out more today. I asked around but nobody saw or heard anything.”

“Well, it was just an owl.” Pete commented with a shake of his head. “Grand scheme of things, I think we’ll live.”

The two men shared a quiet laugh.

“Yeah…” Rick rasped in response, unsure of what to say.

“I’m sorry, I heard you lost your wife.” Pete commented more seriously.

Rick wasn’t sure of what to say. Despite how long it had been since Lori died, the wound was still fresh. It always would be. He simply nodded silently.

“You know, I’m sure it looks like we haven’t lost much but we have, we’ve lost things.” Pete commented, straightening himself up. “Other things we’re just fighting like hell to hold onto. Everything you people have been through, I don’t know if you see that.”

“We do.” Rick replied with a nod, his expression stern and serious.

Pete took a swig of beer. “Bring your kids in for a check-up. I know I offered you one but they really should come in. Jason already did. You were out there a while.”

“Yeah.” Rick answered with a friendly nod. “Thanks, Pete.”

Pete stepped forward and smiled.

“Let’s be friends, man.” Pete said, the stench of alcohol on his breath. “We kinda have to be, right?”

Rick smiled back and nodded. “Yeah, we do.”

“So we will.” Pete answered and shook Rick’s hand. “I’ll see you, Rick.”

Pete patted Rick’s shoulder before making his way out of the house. Rick watched him go and closed the door, stopping to watch the man walk down the street. Even if they had to be friends, Rick wasn’t interested in friendship with Pete. He glanced down at his wedding ring and touched it for a moment, losing himself in memories of Lori and better times.

 

“I’m sorry to lose you, Tobin.” Deanna commented. “Are you sure?”

Deanna was sat on the sofa in her living room with the leader of the construction crew, Tobin. In the chair across from them sat her husband, Reg and in the chair in the far corner sat Maggie. Tobin had just explained what had happened at the construction site and how Abraham had taken over without any effort and with everyone’s support.

“Absolutely. If Abraham had followed my orders, she’d be dead.” Tobin replied.

“Saving someone’s life makes someone a hero but it doesn’t make them qualified to run a construction crew.” Reg interjected.

“They’re still out there, still working. The whole team.” Tobin answered. “And he’s leading them better than I ever could.”

Maggie had the faint trace of a smile on her lips. It was good to hear that Abraham was slowly moving on from the loss of the Washington cure mission. Reg was silent as it wasn’t his decision to make while Deanna was anxious about giving Abraham the job of being the construction crew’s leader.

“I guess it’s settled then.” Deanna finally spoke, standing up. “I’ll speak to Abraham when he’s back and make it official.”

Tobin stood up. “Thank you, Deanna. And the thing is, I know you won’t regret it.”

With that said, Tobin headed for the front door with Reg close behind him. The two men left the house so they could make the final arrangements over the job transition. Deanna stood where she was, feeling very uncomfortable with Abraham’s promotion to leader.

“He’s right, you know.” Maggie told her. “Abraham is more than qualified.”

“I put another one of your people in a position of power.” Deanna commented with a shiver. “You vouch for them. It’s becoming a pattern.”

“We know what we’re doing. It’s why you wanted us here.” Maggie replied. “It’s why Aaron and Daryl are out there looking for more people. You’ve earned a future, you need us for that.”

“So what about Jason?” Deanna questioned the younger woman. “He pulled a gun on me yesterday and threatened me with blackmail after killing two of our own.”

“He’s been through a lot and those men did try to kill him.” Maggie defended. “He’s a good guy, I know he is.”

“How can I know that for sure?” Deanna asked cynically.

“He could have shot you but he didn’t.” Maggie responded. “He could have told everyone what happened but he didn’t. He crafted a story so those men died as heroes instead of monsters.”

“What’s stopping him from going back on his word?” Deanna continued, visibly scared.

“You’re what’s stopping him.” Maggie told her. “All you gotta do is not make him your enemy.”

Deanna nodded in thought. It appeared to be the case. “That’s right.”

“I’ll get to work on the field plates.” Maggie told her, standing up with a smile on her face.

“I’ll be down in a minute.” Deanna told her. She needed time to relax herself.

“Okay.” Maggie replied with a smile and headed downstairs.

 

Several loud knocks on the front door beckoned Carol over to answer it. When she did, she found Sam standing at the door looking up at her with a naughty grin. He held up the two chocolate bars in a plastic bag and shook the bag with pride. Carol grabbed the bag and checked that no one was watching as she pulled him into the house and closed the door.

Twenty minutes later and Carol had shown Sam how to make the cookie mixture and pour it onto the oven tray. She slotted the tray into the oven and turned it on, leaving them to bake as she stood up and turned to the boy.

“When these are done that’s it. I’m not helping you again and you’re not coming back, you got that?” Carol told him sternly as she started cleaning up. “I hope you’re not expecting to leave with more than half of these, you barely did half the work.”

Sam agreed to the terms with a nod. “Were you always a good cook?”

Carol turned back to him from where she stood at the sink. “Sam, we’re not talking.”

She handed him a wet cloth. “Wipe the counter.”

Sam did as he was told, wiping the mess from the counter with the cloth. “Did you like it? Cooking? You know, before?”

“Sam.” Carol repeated, silently reminding him that they weren’t talking.

“We don’t have to be friends, it just doesn’t have to be quiet.” Sam retorted with a sigh.

Carol thought for a moment. Perhaps she was being too harsh and cold towards the boy when he hadn’t actually done anything wrong. He knew about the stolen guns but not all loyalty had to be bought through intimidation and fear.

“I was good at it.” Carol explained. “It distracted me, it made me forget when I was sad.”

“Sometimes when I get sad I break stuff.” Sam admitted as he continued cleaning.

“What kind of stuff?” Carol asked him, suddenly suspicious.

Sam simply shrugged. He didn’t want to go into specifics.

“You said someone broke your owl statue.” Carol recalled. “Did you break it?”

Sam thought for a moment before guiltily closing his eyes and nodding.

“Why?” Carol continued. “Why are you here?”

“Why’d you steal the guns?” Sam shot back.

“Because sometimes you need to protect yourself.” Carol answered bluntly.

“Can I have a gun?” Sam asked after a pause for thought.

“Why do you want one?” Carol asked calmly, making sure not to adversely react.

Sam shrugged. “It’s not for me.”

“Who is it for?” Carol asked sharply but received no answer. “Sam, who is it for?”

Under Carol’s intense gaze and with the creeping fear of reprisal should he answer her question, Sam lost his nerve and ran out of the house. He ran too fast to hear Carol calling after him.

 

Jason and Carl were lying on the grass by the lake side. Jason lay back with his arms wrapped around Carl who was using Jason’s chest as a pillow. They found the position to be rather comfortable, with Carl’s hat sitting beside them on the grass while Jason’s hands gently rubbed Carl’s torso through his shirt. In front of them the water was still and reflected the bright rays of the sun while birds sang loudly in the trees above them.

“This reminds me of the times I spent with Kellin by our lake.” Jason explained, staring up at the clouds. “We shared our first kiss there and spent so many days there, just the two of us.”

Carl remained quiet. He loved being with Jason and found lying next to the lake to be very peaceful and rather romantic, but it pained him slightly to here Jason talk about Kellin. As if sensing his disturbance, Jason changed the subject slightly.

“And now here I am, lying by another lake with the only other person in the world I could have ever fallen in love with.” Jason continued, kissing the top of Carl’s head. “I mean it. If I ever lose you then I’ll be alone for the rest of my days.”

“I’m sure you could find someone else.” Carl argued calmly. “Who wouldn’t want to be with you?”

Jason smiled at the compliment. “Thanks, poppet, but how could anyone else ever measure up to you?”

Carl felt his cheeks heat up at the nickname, he wasn’t used to being called by sweet pet names. “I’m not that special.”

Jason kissed the crook of Carl’s neck. “Yes you are. You’re strong, a survivor, you’re mature and yet you’re still so sweet and kind and affectionate. You’re very special.”

Carl giggled as Jason kissed him and said such affectionate things into his ear. Had he been asked a week before he wouldn’t have believed that they’d get the chance to do this. All that had been on his mind before was surviving and yet they were now relaxing on some grass in a safe community.

“You don’t talk much about your old friends.” Carl commented, holding Jason’s hands in his own.

Jason smiled, squeezing Carl’s hands gently. “You’ve never really asked about them.”

“Can you talk about one of them?” Carl asked. He was curious to know more things from Jason’s past.

Jason shrugged. “Okay, I could talk about Harry for a while. He was the most light hearted out of all of us.”

“Okay.” Carl nodded, adjusting himself so that he was comfortable in Jason’s embrace.

“Harry was such a nice guy, so warm and fuzzy like a playful puppy. He always looked for a laugh and was just so nice all the time.” Jason explained fondly. “There wasn’t a mean bone in his body, even when he was angry he was never nasty.”

“He sounds like a great person.” Carl commented.

Jason nodded, rubbing his cheek against Carl’s head. “Yeah, he was. That’s why I don’t think he survived this. Too damn nice to survive.”

“You’re a nice guy. You survived.” Carl pointed out, giving Jason’s hand a squeeze.

“Yeah, but I can be a total bastard when I need to be.” Jason commented. “Harry couldn’t do that.”

“Maybe he changed.” Carl suggested optimistically. “Everyone has to change at some point.”

Jason thought for a moment. “True. I can’t imagine a dark Harry. He was always too pure.”

“Maybe he’s still out there. Alive.” Carl suggested, trying to give Jason some hope. “And maybe you’ll see him again one day.”

“That would mean he travelled the same distance we did.” Jason argued. “I find that unlikely.”

“Why? It’s been like, two years since you last saw him, right?” Carl retorted.

“Yeah, something like that.” Jason confirmed.

“Well, he could have travelled all this way over two years.” Carl stated logically.

Jason nodded but dropped the subject. “I think you would have liked him, despite his stupid jokes.”

“Stupid jokes?” Carl asked, curious.

Jason chuckled and nodded. “Inside his head he had this huge list of the most pathetic jokes imaginable. They were so bad you couldn’t help but laugh at them.”

“Do you remember any of them?” Carl asked, wanting to know if they really were as bad as Jason said.

“Oh yeah.” Jason replied with a laugh. “I could never forget such ridiculous jokes.”

“Tell me some of them.” Carl requested, adjusting himself again in Jason’s embrace.

Jason sighed and nodded in acceptance. “How many South Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?”

Carl shrugged. “How many?”

“A Brazilian.” Jason quipped, laughing at Carl’s groan in reaction. “I told you they were bad.”

“Keep going.” Carl told him, smiling. It may have been stupid but it was enjoyable.

“I went to the zoo the other day but there was only one little dog.” Jason continued. “It was a Shih Tzu.”

Carl giggled softly at that one. It was just as stupid as the previous joke but something about it tickled his sense of humour more.

“A magician was driving down the road and then he turned into a driveway.” Jason declared another.

Carl took a moment to think about it before groaning and chuckling. The simple wordplay was awful but effective. He found himself laughing more at the image in his head of the magician literally turning into a driveway.

“What’s the best thing about Switzerland?” Jason asked with a smirk as Carl shrugged. “I don’t know either, but the flag is a big plus.”

Carl snorted in amusement and brought one of his hands up to his forehead. These jokes were absolutely terrible even if they somehow managed to make him laugh or at least smile.

“What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college?” Jason asked with Carl shrugging again. “Bison.”

Carl groaned and chuckled, turning round to face Jason. “Okay, enough bad jokes. I can’t take it anymore.”

Jason laughed at Carl’s reaction, his fingers finding their way into his long dark hair.

“Imagine putting up with them for years.” Jason retorted. “Go through that and then you can complain!”

They both laughed at the whole ordeal while staring into each other’s eyes. Slowly but surely, Carl leaned forward and connected their lips in a gentle kiss as Jason allowed himself to fall back onto the grass. Jason’s fingers continued to play gently with the strands of Carl’s hair while their tongues battled softly. They were lost in their own little word and didn’t care who saw them. They were in love.

A loud bark startled the boys and made them break apart. Standing next to them with his tongue out as he panted with a rapidly wagging tail was none other than the chocolate Labrador, Brodie. The dog barked again as the boys finally took notice of him and was quick to bury his head between them seeking affection. Jason and Carl were quick to pet him and stroke him so that he felt important and loved.

“I guess he felt jealous.” Trisha commented as the two lovers finally noticed her standing on the path, hands on hips.

“That’s okay.” Jason replied with a grin. “He can cuddle with us any time he wants.”

Brodie barked again, as if understanding Jason as Carl continued to pet him while Jason finally got to his feet. He could tell by Trisha’s stance that she hadn’t been dragged towards them by Brodie but in fact had been looking for them.

“Jason, I’m trying to get some things prepared for class tomorrow.” Trisha explained to the young man. “Do you mind helping me with a few things?”

Jason glanced back at Carl. “Carl, is it okay if I meet you back at the house?”

Carl nodded as he stood up, Brodie still begging for his attention.

“Sure thing.” Jason finally answered with a nod to Trisha, sticking his hands in his jacket pockets.

 

Carol knocked on Jessie’s front door. She knew she needed to speak with the blonde woman, being a survivor of an abusive relationship Carol recognised all the signs. Sam’s request for a gun had solidified Carol’s resolve to save Jessie from Pete’s abuse. She heard approaching footsteps before the door opened to reveal Pete. He kept the door at an angle, hardly opening it so it was impossible to see inside.

“Hi, Carol, right?” Pete greeted, slightly surprised.

“That’s right.” Carol replied timidly.

“Do you need something?” Pete asked, slightly out of breath. “Not feeling well?”

 “I was with Sam earlier, is he okay?” Carol asked, trying to glance inside.

Pete bent down closer to her. “Why wouldn’t he be?”

Carol could see it in Pete’s mannerisms, his body language and tone of voice. She hadn’t been wrong in her suspicions. The alcohol on his breath also told the other side to the story. As fast as she was developing hatred for the man along with how easy it would be to stab him on his front door step, she reminded herself to continue playing possum.

“Can I talk to Jessie?” Carol asked with a smile.

“Not a good time.” Pete answered and closed the door.

“Pete, don’t.” Carol argued, her real tone coming through.

That was the last straw for the man. He could have made an effort to hide the abuse but instead he slammed the door in her face. Carol knew that Jessie had already been beaten by him earlier, which would explain his actions. Pete would need to be dealt with.

 

Jason followed Trisha into the garage and waited as she opened the door leading to her house so that Brodie could run inside. She closed it behind him and walked back into the garage where Jason stood. The desks were lined up as usual and all the books were organised into piles on the front desk or on the shelves.

“So, what did you need help with?” Jason asked her, looking around for the potential problem.

“Understanding something.” Trisha answered as she sat on the edge of the main desk, staring at him sternly.

“Which would be?” Jason asked her with a shrug, his hands still in his jacket pockets.

Trisha picked up Jason’s lesson notebook and tossed it onto the desk in front of him. She folded her arms as she glared at him, obviously having read the book and all the notes contained within its pages.

“Why are you teaching them to be violent?” Trisha questioned him firmly.

Jason remained where he was, not moving any part of his body even an inch. “Why not?”

“You’re turning them into child soldiers.” Trisha scolded him. “This is a community in here, Deanna is keeping society and civilization alive in here. We don’t need child soldiers.”

Jason let out a sardonic laugh. “Civilization may exist in here but it sure as hell doesn’t exist out there.”

“These children do not need to learn any of this brutality.” Trisha argued stubbornly.

“Yes they do. I refuse to believe that you’re actually this fucking naïve.” Jason retorted with a sigh of frustration. “Knowing what happened during the civil war will not save them from a walker, it won’t save them from the murderous bandits that are out there.”

“That’s where those things are. _Out there_.” Trisha hissed. “The children are in here.”

“And you honestly think that the dangers out there will never find their way in here?” Jason argued, raising his arm to point at the wall. “You turn no matter how you die and there are some elderly residents here. They are ticking time bombs.”

Trisha seemed surprised, glaring back with an expression of confusion.

“Oh, you didn’t know? I’m surprised you haven’t realised it yet.” Jason continued. “If you die with your head still intact, then you come back as one of those things. That’s why it destroyed the world so fast.”

Jason picked up the notebook and tossed it back at her. “Combining that with the psychotic people running around out there who would love to get into a place like this, how can you possibly ask me why I’m teaching people to defend themselves?”

Trisha didn’t remain silent for long, she had more fight in her than that. “We have people like you here for defence, we don’t need to get the kids involved.”

Jason scoffed. “Please, they are hardly little kids. Besides, the more people we have who can defend themselves the more secure this place is.”

“You’re turning them into child soldiers.” Trisha repeated.

“No. I’m making sure they don’t turn into undead freaks. I’m making sure they live.” Jason retorted angrily. “You don’t get to live just because you want to. You have to fight for it. You have to earn the right to live.”

“I’ll need to tell Deanna about this.” Trisha warned.

“Go right ahead.” Jason retorted, unfazed. “But if you want to live, perhaps you should join my class.”

“I don’t need to.” Trisha retorted, refusing to be spoken down to by the younger man.

“Is that so?” Jason questioned with a smirk. “Fantastic! That means I won’t need to save you if something happens.”

“Nothing is going to happen.” Trisha countered angrily.

“Trish, I know you’re not an idiot.” Jason commented as he started to leave. “So stop going out your way to sound like one.”

 

As Carl headed home, he noticed that yet again Enid was climbing the fence to get out of Alexandria. Carl knew he couldn’t ignore the fact that she was going out into the woods alone and seemingly without protection so he ran past his house and down to the main gate. Spencer was on gate watch and was rather surprised to see Carl running towards him.

“Carl, right?” Spencer asked, his Benelli M4 Super 90 on his back. “Do you need anything?”

“Just taking a walk in the woods.” Carl answered.

“Don’t you want a weapon?” Spencer questioned, referring to a gun.

Carl shook his head. “I won’t be long and besides, I have my knife.”

Spencer accepted this answer and opened the gates to let Carl out. Once the boy was out he immediately turned right and headed for the woodland where he hoped he would find Enid. He could hear the large gates slam shut behind him as he rounded the corner and continued on into the trees.

Carl jogged through the woodland as fast as he could while being as quiet as possible. He didn’t want to draw the attention of any walkers and he didn’t want to alert Enid to his presence if he could help it. The further into the woods he went the less hope he had of finding the girl. Unlike Daryl, he didn’t know how to track and she had been out of his sight for at least five minutes, giving her a substantial lead.

He sighed and leaned against a tree trunk, listening out for any sounds of movement as he tried to catch his breath. Unfortunately he couldn’t hear anything that sounded like footsteps and so he rested his head against the bark, looking up at the sky through the leaves. Enid was such a mystery and he just wanted to figure her out, he was always attracted to mysterious people for some reason.

A loud rustling of leaves caught his attention, forcing him to lean forward and focus his eyes on the treeline ahead of him. The rustling became steadily louder as dark shapes started to come into view between the trees. Carl already knew what they were and his suspicions were confirmed when the horrendous smell of rotting flesh reached his nostrils. A small group of walkers were advancing towards him, snarling and rasping as they shuffled and stumbled their way through the undergrowth.

Carl quickly turned around and started running back the way he came. He was fairly sure the walkers hadn’t noticed him but he didn’t want to stick around to find out for sure. Fortunately the gate wasn’t far so he stuck to the outside perimeter of the wall until he reached the corner that lead to the main road. Carl turned the corner towards the gate and jumped back when he spotted a walker next to it.

The walker snarled and started to stumble towards him, its cold dead eyes fixated on him. He knew he couldn’t go back the way he came and he also knew Spencer probably wouldn’t open the gate with a walker right there. Carl had also lied about having his knife and now felt rather defenceless as he backed away from the hungry corpse.

Suddenly, the walker’s head exploded as a rifle bullet shot through it. The walker’s body collapsed to the ground with a loud thud as Carl looked up at the guard tower where Sasha sat, still aiming down the sight of her Custom AR-15 rifle. Carl raised his hand with a thumbs up as a thank you before knocking on the gate for Spencer to open it.

Once the young man had opened the gate, Carl quickly made his way back inside the community and made his way up to the house. He knew that Enid would have avoided the herd and may even have already climbed back over the wall. He knew he didn’t need to worry about her too much. Carl just wished she would trust him and open up to him a bit like Jason had months ago.

 

Deanna answered her front door to reveal none other than Father Gabriel. The black priest seemed rather disturbed judging from his body language and nervous facial expression. Deanna stood aside to let him in.

“Gabriel, what is it?” She asked with concern.

“I need to speak with you privately.” Gabriel told her as he stepped inside.

Once Deanna had closed the door, Gabriel turned to her. “Satan, he disguises himself as the Angel of Light. I’m afraid that false light is here inside these walls. Your community? You say it’s not a paradise but it is.”

Deanna listened closely to what he was saying but she was struggling to follow his rant. He sounded like he had lost his mind.

“I’m grateful to be here, I am but you made a mistake letting in the others.” Gabriel continued, getting to his point.

“How so?” Deanna questioned him.

Unknown to both of them, Maggie was standing in the stairwell, hidden from view but listening intently.

“Rick. His group. They’re not good people.” Gabriel explained. “They’ve done things, they’ve done unspeakable things.”

“To make it out there as long as they did they must have done things.” Deanna replied. “Rick said as much. They survived, that’s what makes them assets.”

“You’re wrong. They can’t be trusted. They’re dangerous.” Gabriel retorted desperately. “You may believe they did what they had to do, that they were afraid and so on.”

Gabriel twitched nervously as he warned her, almost as if he was having some kind of breakdown.

“The day will come when they put their own lives before yours and everyone else’s and they will destroy everything you have here.” Gabriel continued. “Everything that you’re working so hard to build.”

“Why are you just now coming to me with this?” Deanna asked the disgruntled priest.

“Satan. He disguises himself as the Angel of Light. His servants are the false apostles of righteousness. They don’t deserve this. They don’t deserve paradise.” Gabriel explained fearfully. “If you let them stay, no one will be spared. They’ll destroy this place. They’ll kill you and the children? The children will be left to the worst kind of monster. Jason is that monster.”

“What do you mean by monster?” Deanna confirmed with him.

“The kind that preys on the innocence of children. You have to stop it.” Gabriel hissed in fear and desperation. “You have to stop it before it’s too late.”

Deanna thought for a moment before nodding. “Thank you, Gabriel. I have a lot to think about.”

Deanna opened the door to let him out but Gabriel grabbed the door.

“I only wish I had come to you sooner.” He added sincerely. “I just… I hope it isn’t too late.”

Deanna nodded her head once as a way of thanking him again and let him leave. Once Gabriel had returned to the streets she closed the front door and returned to her living room. She had to focus to try to make sense of his rant and separate his actual argument from the religious jargon.

Her focus was broken by the sound of screeching tires and van doors opening and closing. The desperate, ear splitting bellow of Glenn calling for help filled her ears as he opened the back of the van. The supply run had gone terribly wrong…

 

Jason and Carl sat on their bed in their room. Jason was busy noting a few things down in his diary while Carl was reading a comic. It was quiet and peaceful with neither one of them speaking or disturbing the other. They both relished the fact they could be together in total silence yet still be perfectly content.

While Jason wasn’t looking, Carl put his comic down and decided to admire Jason for a few moments. He remembered the things he had read in his diary about his experiences with Kellin which lead his thoughts to become less innocent in nature. Jason could always make him feel incredible, be it with tight hugs, passionate kisses or the deeper intimacies of sexual pleasure. Carl couldn’t help but crave more.

As he observed his older boyfriend, he took in his physical details. Powerful leg muscles from running, strong arms from all the fighting he had to do to survive, a slim, toned torso due to all the activity and although Carl was no expert, he was sure that Jason was rather well endowed. He remembered the indescribable pleasure mentioned in Jason’s diary entries when it came to full sex with Kellin and decided he wanted to know what it was like for himself.

“Jason?” Carl asked tentatively, getting his older lover’s attention.

Jason stopped writing and looked up. “Yeah, poppet?”

“You know how you had sex with Kellin?” Carl continued, nervous.

Jason wasn’t sure where this was going but nodded. “Yeah, like you’ve read in my diary, you mean?”

Carl nodded. “Yeah. I was wondering if we could… you know?”

Jason felt the air leave his lungs. “Are you sure you want to?”

Carl blushed and nodded slowly. “Yeah. I want you to take my virginity like you did with Kellin.”

Jason took a deep breath. “Okay…okay but it hurts a lot at first.”

“Is there anything you can do to make it hurt less?” Carl asked, hoping there would be.

Jason scratched the back of his head. “Well, I can prepare you bit by bit over the next couple of days and nights.”

“Will that take the pain away?” Carl asked, hopeful.

“Not completely, but it’ll hurt way less than it would if I just did it all right now.” Jason explained with a soft smile.

“Can we try tonight?” Carl asked. He knew he sounded excited and desperate but he hadn’t been expecting a yes from Jason.

Jason nodded. “We can have a shower together tonight and I’ll start preparing you in there, okay?”

Carl nodded rapidly. “Okay.”

Jason giggled at how excited Carl was and decided to calm him down the only way he knew how. He leaned forward and kissed him as lovingly as he could.

 

Rick turned away from the window as Carol came in through the front door and quickly shut it behind her. She never took her eyes off Rick as she stepped into the room.

“Pete’s hitting Jessie.” She announced, instantly grabbing Rick’s attention. “Maybe Sam too.”

Rick glared at Carol. He disliked Pete and now he hated him. Now he had an excuse to attack the tall drunkard.

“You know this how?” Rick asked her. He needed to be sure despite his trust in her. “Did Sam tell you?”

“He didn’t have to.” Carol responded, old wounds opening up.

Rick wandered over to one of the windows as he thought about what needed to be done. He would need to talk to Deanna and see if Pete and Jessie could be separated.

“Rick, I know how this is gonna go with Pete. There’s only one way it can go.” Carol told the group leader from experience. “You’re gonna have to kill him.”

 

**So there we have yet another chapter done and dusted. A little shorter than usual but that’s because the next two will be absolutely huge as they are the episodes Try and Conquer.**

**So, lots of issues tackled in this chapter. We’ve learned more about Jason’s past and he has promised to put things right with Carl. Whether he can or not is yet to be seen. Tensions are mounting in Alexandria though and it is all going to come to a head.**

**As I’ve stated before, it is unknown to Jason if Harry and Ryan are alive or dead. As Harry was the focus of part of this chapter, let me know if you would like that character to be brought into this story. He will feature predominantly in the prequel, but if included here we’d be able to see his transformation.**

**Thank you to those who defended me against the accusations of being a rip-off. That means a lot, trust me.**

**Thanks also for all the kudos/votes/favourites/follows/subscriptions/bookmarks etc.**

**Thanks to the reviewers of chapter 21: MagnificentFern, NukeRose, DarkScribe81, Vmbaby, The_Man_Called_Madara, leylinjan, jar98, Sarah_94, Dar, RainbowO and Ida.**

**As usual, let me know what you think, feel and want to see in a review/comment!**


	23. Turning Point

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tensions rise in Alexandria following Nicholas' cowardly actions and Rick's desire to kill Pete.

When the world had ended and the power grid had fallen, the nights had become very dark. The reality of corpses reanimating and eating the living made the world dark enough without the loss of physical light. However, it was something that any survivor got used to and they would often create their own light. It could be a fire or a hope, a dream to get them through the day and through the dark night.

This night was one of the darkest in a long time. In the evening, while the sun was still in the sky, Glenn, Eugene and Nicholas had returned from the supply run. They had successfully retrieved the devices they needed to keep the power in Alexandria going. However, they had also returned with an extremely injured Tara who was on death’s doorstep after a horrible head injury. They had also returned without Aiden and Noah, who had both died when things had taken a bad turn.

The atmosphere among the three men was very distinct. There was hatred. Nicholas had been bleeding from punches to the face, presumably from Glenn and couldn’t wait to get away from the Asian man. Glenn despised the mere sight of Nicholas and put all his focus into helping Tara, as did Eugene. Thankfully, as Pete was a surgeon, he was able to stabilise Tara though it was unknown if she would pull through.

Shortly after their return and the breaking of the bad news to everyone, Deanna had demanded to interview Glenn and Nicholas to find out what had happened. She had pushed down the grief over the loss of her son so she could do her duty as leader of the community. Eugene had refused to be interviewed as he had elected to be Tara’s guardian and vowed not to leave her bedside.

The news of the deaths had sent powerful echoes throughout the community. Many were upset to hear of Aiden’s death as they all knew him. Others were upset to hear people had died, regardless of who they were and Rick’s group were rocked with grief at Noah’s passing. He had led them back to Beth, they had brought him to Virginia as a promise to Beth’s memory. He had been a symbolic connection to Beth’s memory and now, just like her, he too was gone.

 

The crickets chirped loudly in the darkness of the night. The community of Alexandria was quieter than usual, a sombre silence filling the atmosphere. A cool breeze passed gently through the community, as if the wind itself was sensitive to everyone’s grief. That same cool breeze blew in through the open window of Jason and Carl’s bedroom, caressing their heads and naked shoulders as they lay in bed together.

They were laying in one of their favourite positions, on their sides with Jason being the big spoon to Carl’s little spoon. Carl had opted to lay on his side for the rest of the night after Jason’s first attempt to prepare him for full love making had left him sore. Carl was eager to do anything and everything with Jason but certain parts of his body were not as immediately welcome to the idea.

Carl was upset over Noah’s death. They hadn’t lost anyone since Tyreese and that already felt like a very long time ago. Jason stroked some strands of hair out of Carl’s eyes and kissed the crook of his neck softly, his other hand rubbing Carl’s body as soothingly as possible. He knew they didn’t need to talk, Carl just needed someone there to hold him. He was a strong young man and he would move on from the grief but he still needed time to just grieve.

Carl finally broke the silence. “You were right about Nicholas.”

“In what way?” Jason asked, his voice soft in Carl’s ear.

“He got Noah killed.” Carl muttered back. “You said he’d get someone killed.”

“Oh, that.” Jason responded, thinking for a moment. “Believe me, I’m not happy I was right.”

“But you knew.” Carl continued, his voice low.

“I’ve met people like him before.” Jason repeated what he had said the day before. “I lost people, friends, because of men like him.”

“Noah didn’t deserve to die.” Carl commented, his voice cracking.

Jason pulled the younger teen closer. “No one ever misses the ones who do.”

“Noah, Tyreese, Beth, Bob, mum.” Carl started listing. “Kellin and everyone else. They should all be here with us.”

Jason smiled at Carl’s consideration of Kellin, even though it wasn’t necessary. “They should be. All we can do now is honour their memory.”

“How?” Carl asked, his voice practically a whisper.

“By living. They all died so that we could live.” Jason explained slowly. “We owe it to those who died alongside us to keep on living, no matter what.”

“I miss them all so much.” Carl finally cracked, tears sliding down his face.

Jason pulled his lover close and kissed the top of his head. “Me too. Me too.”

 

Deanna sat at her desk in the living room. She rewound one of the videos on her laptop which was the recording of Nicholas’ interview earlier that evening. She had interviewed both Glenn and Nicholas about how her son had died and it was now time to review the tapes to study their answers and work out who was lying. One of them was lying about her son’s death along with the death of Noah.

In the video, Nicholas sat in the chair and fidgeted in an effort to get more comfortable. He shook his head and momentarily closed his eyes as he swallowed heavily before speaking. It wasn’t easy telling a mother how her son died.

“Aiden was protecting us from a roamer, shooting at it.” Nicholas explained slowly. “Then Glenn distracted him.”

“How did that lead to Tara and Aiden getting injured?” Deanna questioned him sternly.

“Aiden looked away while he was shooting. One of the bullets hit a grenade.” Nicholas explained, hesitating with grief. “It blew us all back. Aiden got impaled on debris.”

“Is that how he died?” Deanna asked the curly haired man, doing her best to keep her voice level.

“They wanted to just go. I didn’t.” Nicholas explained, his voice cracking. “I wasn’t going to leave him.”

“What about Tara?” Deanna asked, curious over Tara surviving when they were apparently so eager to leave Aiden for dead.

“And I wasn’t gonna leave her.” Nicholas added quickly. “I tried to get Aiden outta there but they refused to help me. They ran when they heard the roamers.”

Deanna glared as Nicholas trailed off. Her son had been consumed alive by the dead. “What happened with Noah?”

“Then when we got into the lobby we got trapped in the revolving doors.” Nicholas explained. “Eugene lured half of the roamers away but we couldn’t open the doors without the roamers getting in too.”

“What did you all do?” Deanna pressed.

“I suggested for us to wait but Glenn didn’t want to do that. He started hitting on the glass, pushing my door open.” Nicholas explained angrily. “They were gonna kill me, or they were trying to or they just didn’t care.”

“How did Noah die?” Deanna pressed for details.

“Their carelessness had got Aiden killed and I knew if I didn’t push back then I’d be dead too!” Nicholas continued desperately. “I got out but the roamers got Noah, just like they would have gotten me if I hadn’t pushed back.”

“So you’re saying that Noah and my son died because of their recklessness?” Deanna questioned, finding it hard to believe considering what Aaron had told her about the group upon their induction.

“They did this, it was them!” Nicholas accused strongly, fearing Deanna’s doubt.

“But you all came back together.” Deanna commented, this was one part that didn’t make sense to her. “How did that happen?”

Nicholas hesitated and took a moment before he prepared to speak.

“Mum, what are you doing?” Spencer asked from the doorway, interrupting the interview.

“I need it for later. I have to do this now.” Deanna explained, she would be too upset later. “No guns. No going outside the walls. Same goes for Glenn until I finish looking into this.”

“What do you need to look into it? I’m telling you how it went down!” Nicholas argued in disbelief. “These people have to go, they are not like us! I know you see it too.”

Deanna glared back at the angry man. “You don’t know what I see Nicholas and I see a great deal.”

Deanna paused the video and sat back with folded arms. Something about Nicholas’ story didn’t make sense and she never got him to explain how they all came back together. Glenn’s version of the story had made more sense in that regard. This was also the second time that Nicholas was being interrogated by her after his fight with Jason. Either Rick’s group was a problem or Nicholas was no longer to be trusted.

 

Glen sat on the porch outside the infirmary. It was late at night and he had been by Tara’s side for hours, blaming himself for what had happened. He was the leader of the supply group and he had let Aiden and Nicholas’ combined selfishness cause so much harm. He sat with his back against one of the pillars as he explained what happened to Rick, who was crouched in front of him.

“I saw the grenades.” Glenn began, reliving the horrific moments. “I tried to stop him…”

_The walker growled loudly as it spotted Aiden and stumbled towards him. The young man turned round and shot at the walker’s head but the bullet bounced off the helmet it wore. This walker had been a soldier before death and was still wearing all of its armour. Aiden fired several more times but each shot at the same effect. Glenn observed what was going on from the other side of the shelf._

_“It’s got armour.” He told the inexperienced man. “Let it come closer.”_

_“You got it.” Aiden responded and continued shooting, knocking the walker onto its back._

_Glenn took a look down at the walker to try and find a way to assist Aiden with its execution and froze when he spotted what was attached to the walker’s armour. On the armoured vest it wore was a strap holding several grenades and Aiden was shooting at its body for some reason._

_“Aiden! Stop!” Glenn shouted desperately, fearful for what could happen if Aiden shot the wrong place. “Stop!”_

_Glenn’s fears came to life when Aiden fired three more shots, the third one striking one of the grenades. The walker was disintegrated in the resulting explosion as shrapnel and debris flew through the air, everyone in the group was thrown backwards by the blast. The last thing Glenn heard after the explosion were loud screams before everything went black._

“He was gonna run but we made him stay.” Glenn continued, referring to Nicholas. “Couldn’t get Aiden outta there without help.”

  _Glenn, Noah and Nicholas ran up to where Aiden was. He had been thrown against the wall by the explosion and had been impaled by large pieces of metal that had pinned him to the wall. He groaned and cried in pain as he regained consciousness, the excruciating pain shooting through his entire body as blood trickled down from the wounds._

_“Hey, hey, it’s going to be okay.” Glenn told him in a hushed voice. “We’re gonna get you outta here, alright?”_

_Aiden looked at him in disbelief, blood trickling down his face._

_“Everything’s going to be fine, I promise.” Glenn told him. “I need you to stay quiet, can you do that?”_

_Aiden nodded his head and glanced down at his body. He could see at least three large spikes of metal that were sticking out of his body. He whimpered in fear, knowing that he would die if he was left there but could also die from blood loss once he was removed. Glenn and Nicholas tried to pull him off the metal but barely moved him, only succeeding in causing Aiden to cry out loudly in pain._

_“The flare, it’s burning out!” Noah warned them from behind._

_“Again!” Glenn commanded as Aiden continued to whimper._

_“We’re not gonna make this!” Nicholas argued with a shake of his head, fear in his voice._

_Glenn grabbed him and pulled him closer. “Hey, yes we are! But I need your help. We can do this!”_

_“Nicholas, don’t leave me!” Aiden pleaded._

_“Okay!” Nicholas nodded and grabbed hold of the younger man as they tried again._

“We couldn’t get him out in time so Nicholas ran. We had to leave him.” Glenn told Rick, guilt thick in his voice. “We reached the lobby and got trapped in the revolving doors…”

_The walkers banged on the glass of the revolving doors from both sides. Glenn and Noah were trapped on one side and Nicholas was trapped on the other. The exit and entrance were both flooded with walkers, all of them snarling loudly and banging against the glass in a desperate attempt to get at their terrified prey._

_“Hey! Maybe we can shoot a way past them!” Nicholas suggested. “You guys still have guns!”_

_“But you have the ammo!” Glenn barked back angrily._

_“We gotta do something, man!” Nicholas replied. “We’re gonna die in here!”_

_“There has to be another way!” Noah commented as he looked around for anything they could use. “There has to be a way!”_

_Suddenly, the throbbing beats of Aiden’s music could be heard approaching from the van. The three of them looked outside to find Eugene slowly driving the van by the door to get the attention of the walkers on that side. The loud music immediately had the desired effect._

_“Hey! Hey! Over here! Come get me!” Eugene shouted at the walkers, smacking the side of the door. “Come get me! Come on! Come on! Come and get me!”_

_“Alright, Eugene!” Glenn praised the man as the walkers followed the van leaving the door forgotten. “Yeah!”_

“All he had to do was hold the door.” Glenn explained, his voice shaking as new tears formed. “But he panicked…”

_The lack of walkers on one side presented a new problem as it meant the doors were more inclined to move from the force of the other walkers slamming against it. If Nicholas, Noah and Glenn didn’t hold the doors with all their strength then the revolving doors would swing round and offer them up to the hungry herd behind the glass._

_“Hey, Nicholas!” Glenn shouted, smacking the glass. “I need you both to keep the door steady, alright? I’m gonna break the glass!”_

_Nicholas looked unconvinced by the plan, the constant pounding of the walkers unnerving him as his legs strained from the effort of holding the door in place._

_“We climb out, you push out, we get the rifle and we’re good.” Glenn explained. It would all need to be fast but it was certainly possible. “Alright? Ready?”_

_Glen slammed the butt of his gun against the glass, the door shaking from the impact. He repeated the action, slamming it against the glass harder than before, so much so that Nicholas’ door opened enough to create a three inch gap._

_“No! Stop! It’s not safe!” Nicholas bellowed in a panic._

_Noah applied more weight to the door to try and keep it steady._

_“This is the only way.” Glenn argued his case._

_“No, it’s not going to break!” Nicholas retorted, rapidly shaking his head._

_“It will.” Glenn argued._

_“It will, just hold it. You can.” Noah added, trying to encourage the man to stay strong._

_“Trust me, okay?” Glenn pleaded, preparing to hit the glass again. “Count to three, count to three.”_

_Nicholas glared at Glenn as panic set in and fear became his master._

_“One, two, three!” Glenn called out and smacked the glass again._

_At the same time he hit the glass, Nicholas desperately pushed himself against the door in an attempt to escape. This created a gap on Noah’s side that would allow the walkers to reach in if it got any wider. Nicholas managed to stick his foot between the door and the frame, preventing it from closing as he started pushing his body through the gap._

_“Nicholas! Nicholas don’t!” Glenn shouted in desperation. They would die if Nicholas pushed the door any further._

_Nicholas ignored them and threw his bag outside as he struggled to get through the gap. They continued to call out to him, begging him not to go through with it as they fought to keep the door shut. Noah grimaced in fear as the walkers started reaching in, their cold fingers mere inches from him._

“Noah… I had him.” Glenn choked out. “I had his hand…”

_Suddenly, Nicholas made it through the gap, opening the door wide enough for the walkers to reach in and grab Noah’s leg. Noah fell to the floor and grabbed onto Glenn tightly who in turn grabbed onto him, refusing to let him die._

_“Don’t let go!” Noah pleaded before the two of them screamed with effort._

_Suddenly, they lost the tug of war with the walkers and Noah was dragged into the swarm of hungry corpses, the door slamming shut behind him. Glenn pounded against the glass as he watched his friend disappear into the dark mass of limbs, screaming his name._

“I tried…” Glenn continued, barely talking due to the heavy guilt and grief weighing on his shoulders. “I watched him die.”

_Glenn jumped back when Noah jumped out of the crowd and slammed himself against the glass, staring at him in terror as the walkers started to tear him apart. Glenn was frozen to the spot in shock and horror as he watched the walkers devour his friend, the young man letting out blood curdling cries as he was ripped apart by the cannibalistic corpses._

_As Noah’s cries abruptly stopped and his body was broken into several pieces, Glenn sat in silence. His whole body shook as tears fell down his face. It was the first time anyone had ever died while on a run with him. It was the first time someone he was responsible for hadn’t made it. He had been absolutely powerless to save his friend, all he could do was watch._

“I caught Nicholas trying to steal the van.” Glenn explained. “I almost left him out there, could’ve told a story.”

_Eugene slowly drove the van through the warehouse complex. He had turned the music off and had lost the walker herd for the time being and was now looking for Glenn and the others. As he searched, he heard someone shouting and looked ahead to spot Nicholas running towards him._

_“Hey! Hey! Move over! We’re leaving!” Nicholas barked as he opened the door._

_Eugene took one look at the panicked man and turned the engine off before stepping out of the van to stand face to face with him._

_“Get back in the van!” Nicholas ordered angrily._

_“Not until you tell me where they are.” Eugene countered. He had saved Tara, he had killed several walkers and led a herd away. He was no longer a coward._

_Nicholas breathed rapidly and deeply through his nose before replying. “Either you come back with me or you stay here and die with your friends. Those are your choices.”_

_Eugene worked out exactly what was going on, having been a coward for a long time himself he could tell when he saw one. Out of loyalty to his friends, he reached down for his gun as he knew he would need to defend the van with his life. Tara’s life also depended on him to stand up to Nicholas and do the right thing. Inexperience meant that he was slow, however, and Nicholas was able to grab the hand that held the gun and force Eugene to the floor._

_The curly haired man scrambled to get in the van and turn the ignition but before he could Glenn ran up to him and grabbed him. The Asian man pulled Nicholas out of the van and threw him to the ground. Glenn held him down with one hand while he used the other to deliver two punches with all the strength he could muster. Nicholas lay on the ground unconscious after the second punch. As he calmed down, his anger gave way to grief as his tears threatened to fall again._

_“Help me get him in the back.” Glenn requested, his voice breaking._

_“Where’s Noah?” Eugene asked, not moving until he knew._

_Glenn sighed and stared at Eugene with red eyes before shaking his head._

Rick glared at Glenn in disappointment. After leaving Aiden to die and getting Noah killed, Rick would have killed Nicholas without a second thought. He was already starting to regret stopping Jason from killing the man during the fight they had a few days before.

Glenn noticed the glare. “You think I should’ve?”

“They don’t know what they’re doing.” Rick answered lowly. “Any of them.”

“Then show them!” Glenn argued.

“I don’t know if they can see it, how things really are, I don’t think they can yet.” Rick argued, knowing full well how naïve the Alexandrians were. “They haven’t caught up.”

Glenn refused to give up on the community. “We have to be here. We have to.”

Rick nodded in agreement. “Yeah, we do. But their rules? We don’t answer to them.”

“We are them, Rick. We are now!” Glenn argued before his voice started to crack. “Noah…He believed in this place. I’m telling you, we gotta make this work.”

Rick bowed his head in thought before nodding. Glenn was right, whatever happened they needed to remain in that community. Even if it meant taking it over. Rick stood up and cast his gaze over to the small lake in the centre of the community where Sam’s toy boat continued to float on the tranquil water. It reminded the constable that he still had to deal with Pete so he decided to leave Glenn to grief and walked away.

 

Rick stood in the darkness as he watched Jessie, Ron and Sam on their front porch. Pete was still at the infirmary with Tara so the Anderson household was quiet for the time being. He knew it wouldn’t stay that way, not with Pete’s abusive nature residing there. Something would need to be done before Jessie or one of the boys were killed by another alcoholic rampage.

Glancing to his left, he spotted Carol who was doing the same thing. She stood in the darkness observing the family like a statue. Rick walked up to her, stopping beside her as the older woman turned to him.

“I sent a casserole to Deanna’s family.” Carol told him. “Wanted her to see that.”

Rick nodded as he stood beside her, his focus on Jessie as she sat out on the front porch, completely oblivious to the two pairs of eyes that were studying her.

“Have you thought about Pete?” Carol asked him, not shifting her gaze from Jessie. “About what I said?”

“Yeah.” Rick replied gruffly. His hatred for Pete growing the more he thought about him.

“I talked to Sam some more. He said his mum put a bolt on the inside of his closet, tells him to lock himself in sometimes and not come out till morning.” Carol explained, turning to look at Rick. “Said he can hear his dad yelling, things breaking, his mum crying. Last night it got real quiet in the middle of it and he went out and found her lying on the floor. Unconscious. Bleeding.”

Rick lowered his head as he listened to Carol. All of this was making the temptation to find Pete and kill him right there and then even stronger with every detail.

“Pete was just sitting on the porch.” Carol finished, folding her arms.

Rick shook with anger. The first time he had ever met Pete he had been sitting on the porch smoking. Could something similar have happened that night when Rick was completely unaware of Pete’s true nature? He remembered that moment perfectly well.

_Rick headed down the street with his jacket zipped up and his hands in his pockets. The night time air was cool and was a stark contrast to the warmth of a large house. He was having trouble believing that the place was real and genuine. How they could have survived for so long without another group destroying the place was food for thought. They must have been the luckiest group of people to ever walk the Earth._

_“You’re Rick.” A man’s voice interrupted his thoughts._

_Rick turned to see the silhouette of a man on the porch of Jessie’s house. He sat back in his chair and smoked a cigarette, the darkness obscuring his face._

_“Yeah.” Rick answered._

_“My wife cut your hair.” The man stated, identifying himself._

_Rick stared at him, waiting for a follow up to the comment. Was there a problem with her cutting Rick’s hair that he hadn’t been told about beforehand?_

_“Yeah.” Rick answered again, unsure of where the conversation was headed._

_“Welcome to Alexandria.” Jessie’s husband replied before taking a long draw of his cigarette._

_Rick nodded before continuing his walk down the road._

“Why do you care what happens to Jessie?” Rick rasped. Carol had become so cold over the last few months he was genuinely surprised.

“You know why.” Carol replied, her face softening to show a little of her old self. “I know why you do.”

Rick didn’t look at her, his gaze fixed on the ground. “Why?”

“I’ve seen you talk to her.” Carol remarked. She had read the body language. She knew Rick cared about Jessie.

Rick stared back at her, unsure of what to say as his secret was out. He watched as Jessie followed her boys back inside the house, awaiting Pete’s return.

“If walkers hadn’t gotten Ed, I wouldn’t be standing here now.” Carol commented, reflecting on how timid and weak she used to be.

Rick thought for a moment. Carol had shown incredible strength, confidence, resilience and adaptability over the last two years of the apocalypse. Much like him, Carol had evolved into a totally different person. Everyone had gone through such a transformation because it wasn’t a special change. The evolution was all about becoming who they truly were inside, it was about being their true selves.

“Yeah, you would be.” Rick replied with a nod before walking away, Carol watching him as he went.

Rick wandered down to the lakeside and watched Sam’s boat floating on the water. He needed to find a way to deal with Pete that wouldn’t seem too extreme. He could offer to talk to him as a friend, as Pete believed that’s what they were, and just slit his throat. Or he could try and get him outside the walls, though this would be much harder to do. Rick pulled out the Colt Detective Special revolver that Carol gave him. An easier option would be to just shoot Pete, either get him alone or wait for him to attack Jessie again. Rick would kill Pete, that much was already decided in Rick’s mind. It was just a question of how and when.

“Hey, Rick! Rick?” Pete greeted as he returned from the infirmary. “You okay, man?”

Rick turned his head round to glare fiercely at the tall surgeon. It was night, no one was watching them and Rick had the revolver in his hand. He could shoot Pete now and end it all, it would be so simple. Pete looked back at him, confused by his aggressive expression. Rick realised it would look bad if he did anything in that moment, he would need to wait until the right time.

“Keep walking.” Rick growled, his body shaking as he fought to control himself.

“What? What are you…?” Pete trailed off as Rick’s glare became even fiercer, as if he was trying to kill him with his eyes.

Pete swallowed thickly before finally backing away. He turned away from Rick and headed home, intimidated by the sudden change in Rick’s demeanour towards him. Once he left, Rick turned back around and tried to relax himself, his knuckles white from gripping the revolver so tightly.

 

_The police cruiser stopped outside the front of the station. William cut the ignition and stepped out of the car while Jason got out from the passenger side. Jason closed the door with a sigh and stared at his father over the roof of the cruiser._

_“Why are you insisting on bringing me here to see this guy?” Jason questioned his father. “Kellin and I do have plans for the day, you know.”_

_William nodded as he locked the car and pocketed his keys. “I know, but this won’t take long.”_

_“You didn’t answer my question, Dad.” Jason pressed, not moving from the side of the car._

_William sighed. “You want to know why I’m being over-cautious, right? I’m going to show you.”_

_Jason sighed and accepted the answer. He followed his father up the steps and into their local police station. Jason kept his hands in his jacket pockets as he followed his father down the corridors of the department. One thing that he immediately noticed was how much quieter the building was compared to other times he had been there._

_“Dad, where is everyone? It’s so quiet.” Jason asked, looking into the open office doors to find empty rooms._

_“Most of them are out on duty. We’re getting a lot of calls to incidents of assault, GBH, attempted murder and full on murder cases.” William explained as they continued down the quiet hallway. “The others are either on sick leave or in hospital after being injured on duty.”_

_“You mean like Shane’s partner last week?” Jason questioned, reflecting on the man he had seen comatose in the hospital bed._

_William shook his head, his police boots thudding on the floor with each step. “No, none of them were shot like Officer Grimes.”_

_“Then what happened to them?” Jason inquired. “Were they beaten or stabbed?”_

_William sighed nervously as they approached the holding cells. “They were bitten.”_

_“Bitten?” Jason repeated, confused._

_“Bitten.” His father repeated and opened the door to the holding cells._

_They walked into the small room that housed an office area and five small holding cells. These were what they would put suspects in until they were interviewed, released or charged. If they were charged then they would be transferred to one of the larger stations closer to the city of Atlanta._

_“Ah, you’re back.” A voice called from the office area._

_Jason and William both turned to the voice. Sitting behind the desk was another officer who looked to be a similar age to William. He was taller with broader shoulders, a dark brown goatee and slicked back dark brown hair._

_“Barry, this is my son, Jason.” William introduced them. “Jason, this is Officer Burton, one of the few with his head screwed on properly.”_

_Barry extended his hand to Jason, smirking as he noticed they both wore black fingerless gloves. “Pleasure to meet you, kid.”_

_“So, I take it our friend in cell three hasn’t been transferred yet?” William asked his colleague. “Despite the request having been put through two days ago.”_

_Barry nodded. “Still here, still growling like the caged animal he is.”_

_William nodded. “Alright. My son is a biology student. I want him to take a look.”_

_“Bill, don’t we have a medical examiner for that?” Officer Burton countered, uncomfortable with Jason being near this unknown suspect in the holding cell._

_“Tried to call him this morning but he’s not answering his phone.” William explained with a shrug. “Besides, I want Jason to see one of them.”_

_“Why?” Barry rasped. He tried to stay away from the strange violent people they had been encountering._

_“Because he doesn’t understand why I want him to carry a gun.” William replied, turning to look at his son._

_“Officer Burton, I understand the gun is for protection but my Dad has been kinda paranoid recently.” Jason explained to the imposing man before him. “If this helps to explain why he’s been worrying so much, then it’s worth the time.”_

_“Here I am trying to relax and now you want to worry me sick by having your boy near that guy?” Barry questioned William, taking on board what Jason has said._

_“Unless he can chew through steel bars I’m sure we’ll be fine.” William remarked with a smirk._

_Barry sighed and raised his hands in defeat. “Fine. Just keep your distance, dammit.”_

_William led his son over to the holding cells. In the middle cell stood a middle aged man with black hair that was slowly turning grey. He was only a few inches taller than Jason and was slightly overweight with a prominent beer belly forming under his dirty shirt. He let out a loud raspy breath and stumbled towards them, walking himself up against the bars of the cell as he reached his hands through the gaps._

_Jason watched with morbid fascination as the man tried to claw at them from behind the bars. His face looked slightly sunken, almost deflated especially around the eyes. His skin was an odd colour, a pale faded yellow which was either a horrible skin disease or a lack of blood flow. His movements were also slow and rigid. The most striking thing for Jason was the man’s eyes, they were discoloured and seemed lifeless, as if the spark had been removed from them. They didn’t look human to him._

_“Jason, this is George Trevor.” His father explained. “Couple of our guys caught up to him after someone reported an assault.”_

_“How do you know his name?” Jason asked while George continued to rasp and snarl. “He’s not very talkative.”_

_“We checked his wallet. He has a wife, Jessica, and a daughter, Lisa.” William explained. “We went to his house but we can’t find his wife or his daughter.”_

_“You think they left because he’s like this?” Jason pondered aloud._

_“Might have. Maybe he killed them.” William suggested morbidly. “So, tell me, what do you think is wrong with him?”_

_Jason glanced at his father. He wasn’t sure why his father expected him to have an answer just because he studied biology and worked with tigers. He wasn’t a doctor or a scientist by any means. He sighed and studied the rasping, clawing man behind the bars in front of him._

_“Maybe it’s drugs?” Jason suggested after thinking. “Something extreme like Bath Salts?”_

_“What if I told you he hasn’t drank any water since we arrested him?” William asked his son. He knew this was the strangest part._

_“And he’s been like this the entire time?” Jason questioned in disbelief. His father nodded. “But that’s not possible.”_

_“Exactly. The reason I’ve been so paranoid, as you put it, is because of this.” William explained seriously as Barry came in to check on them. “This man is dead. From what we’ve seen and heard, he’s dead.”_

_“He can’t be dead.” Jason retorted quickly, glaring at his father. “He’s up and walking around.”_

_“Apparently being dead hasn’t stopped him doing that.” William remarked. “Jason, I’ve shot at these people. They don’t die.”_

_“I don’t believe that.” Jason retorted bluntly, folding his arms._

_“Then let’s make a believer out of you.” Barry commented and stepped forward._

_Before Jason could figure out what the tall man was doing, he unholstered his sidearm, a Beretta 96FS with a compensator, and shot George in the chest once. The loud bang of the gun made Jason jump and scream as he witnessed the bullet penetrate George’s chest and embed itself in the back wall of the cell. George stumbled slightly before resuming his efforts to claw at them, completely unfased by the gunshot._

_Jason stared wide-eyed in disbelief. “Are you guys pulling a prank on me or something?”_

_“This isn’t a prank, Jason.” William answered sternly. “Barry, let him check your gun.”_

_Barry nodded and handed Jason his Beretta. Jason took the gun, feeling the added weight of the compensator and ejected the magazine. Studying the bullets, he could tell they were real so he slid the magazine back into the gun and flicked off the safety._

_“Go on, shoot him.” William encouraged._

_Jason hesitated. This was his first time firing at something that wasn’t a manaquien or bullseye in target practice. His hands shook slightly as he raised the gun and aimed for George’s heart. If they were wrong and he was alive, the shot to the heart would kill him quickly. If he was actually dead then the shot to the heart would be the ultimate proof for Jason._

_With his decision made, he aimed for George’s heart. The man continued to snarl and reach for him, his shirt stained with the blood that had poured from the bullet hole in his chest. One thing Jason did notice was how little blood there was for such a horrendous injury. Relaxing his mind, Jason quickly fired the gun and shot George in the heart. Yet again the man stumbled before growling and returning to his reaching and snarling._

_“That’s not possible…” Jason muttered as his blood ran cold in horror. “Dad, what the fuck is happening?”_

_“He’s dead, son. He’s dead and he’s dangerous.” William explained, glaring at the snarling man. “These people attack others. It was someone like him that killed that dog.”_

_Jason looked up at his father, still in shock. His father had asked for his opinion on someone’s pet dog that they had found mutilated. The corpse had been fed upon by something unknown and Jason had been called in by his father to tell them if it had been a big cat. They didn’t want to accuse the tiger sanctuary right away so they had wanted Jason’s opinion. Jason hadn’t thought it had been possible for a human being to do that to the animal._

_“How do we kill them?” Jason asked desperately. “There has to be a way. If it can be given life it can have it taken away.”_

_William and Barry shared a look before he spoke to his son. “The only thing that stops them is a gunshot to the head.”_

_“The head?” Jason repeated. It sounded like something out of a horror film._

_“Their brain seems to be the weak spot.” William explained. “So I want you to kill this one.”_

_“You’re asking me to kill George?” Jason confirmed, still in shock._

_“George is dead, son.” William retorted. “I’m asking you to kill a monster.”_

_Jason nodded and swallowed heavily. He raised the gun yet again and aimed at the man’s head. He stared into the lifeless eyes as George bore his teeth in an aggressive snarl. Jason took a breath and pulled the trigger, shooting George in the forehead. Blood splattered on the back wall as George’s head snapped back and his body went limp. The man’s body collapsed back onto the floor of the cell where it remained motionless. With shaky hands, Jason handed Barry back his gun._

_William walked over to a locker and opened it up. He pulled out a thigh holster and a Smith & Wesson M&P police issue handgun. He returned to Jason and handed him the holster._

_“Put it on.” William told his son._

_“Why?” Jason asked, still in shock and not thinking clearly._

_“Because there are more of those things out there.” William bent down so he was level with Jason. “And I need you to protect your mother while I’m away. And you need to protect Kellin. He’s a sweet boy and he’s been so good to you.”_

_“Where are you gonna be?” Jason asked in concern as he strapped on the thigh holster._

_William handed him the gun so he could holster it. “I’m gonna be out helping people. Trying to keep the public safe from these things.”_

_“You will be back though, right?” Jason asked, fearful for his father’s safety._

_“Of course I will.” William replied and hugged his son close. “I’ll do a better job if I’m not distracted by worrying about your mother, you and Kellin. Keep them safe for me.”_

_“I will.” Jason answered, finally pulling away from the hug._

_“Promise me.” William stressed._

_“I promise.” Jason answered firmly._

Jason groaned as he woke up, the sunlight streaming in through the window and onto his face yet again. It always irritated him that despite being millions of miles away the sun still had perfect aim. He sat up and grabbed his diary from the bed side drawer so he could mark his tallies as he usually did. It had been a very long time since he had killed his first walker, he couldn’t even count how many he had killed since.

A pair of arms wrapping around his waist brought him out of his thoughts as Carl cuddled up against his back. The younger teen rested his chin on Jason’s shoulder and looked at the pages of the diary. He counted the tallies and worked out that he and Jason had known each other for forty one days. Checking one of the separate tallies he discovered they had been together for thirty four days. It had felt a lot longer than a month but time in the apocalypse did tend to extend itself.

Jason closed the diary and turned his head to kiss Carl softly. It was a silent morning greeting which was accepted openly by the younger who kept his hands on Jason’s navel. Carl smiled into the kiss as his hands started to brush lower. This didn’t go unnoticed by Jason who reached round behind Carl to place a hand on the boy’s backside. He squeezed it possessively as their kiss intensified.

Jason moaned into the kiss as Carl’s hands finally lowered themselves to his hardness. Carl groaned into the kiss as his hands squeezed and rubbed Jason’s member through the fabric of his boxers. Their morning routine had become sexual by force of habit. In reality, neither of them were sure that their stay in the community would be permanent so they were taking advantage of the time and privacy they had.

Jason turned his body round and grabbed Carl’s backside with both of his hands, squeezing the cheeks gently as Carl had pulled Jason’s boxers down and had one hand stroking the shaft slowly. They kissed again, their tongues battling one another teasingly as they both moaned into the kiss. Jason eased Carl back on the bed as one of his hands reached down to pull down Carl’s boxers as well, grasping the younger’s solid member in his fist before he started pumping it slowly.

Jason wasn’t sure how Carl had gone from the shy boy to the sexually hungry teen who currently had his hands on the most sensitive part of his anatomy. Jason decided to blame it on hormones, though he knew if he asked Carl would claim it was out of love or out of Jason being irresistibly attractive. Whatever the reason was, Jason certainly wasn’t complaining.

When Carl moaned particularly loudly, Jason decided it was a good time to prepare him more for when they finally went all the way. He surprised Carl by stopping his ministrations and pulled him up off the bed and into his arms. Carl instinctively wrapped his legs around Jason’s hips as he carried the younger into the en-suite bathroom and into the shower.

Once they were under the hot spray of the shower water, Jason once again descended to his knees in front of Carl. Carl’s head fell back and rested against the cold shower wall as his ardent shaft disappeared inside Jason’s mouth. Jason slowly bobbed his head back and forth along Carl’s need while his hands reached up to tease the younger’s nipples, drawing exquisite whimpers out of his lover.

By the way Carl’s erection was throbbing in his mouth, he knew he couldn’t keep it up for long. They were both far more sensitive in the mornings and Carl was clearly far hornier than usual if his moans were anything to go by. Jason lowered his hands, rubbing them down the expanse of Carl’s slim body before they reached the floor. He reached for the bottle of lotion he had used the night before. He had yet to ask Eric or Aaron for the appropriate supplies so he had been forced to improvise. Jason covered his fingers in the lotion before bringing his hand up to Carl’s rear.

Jason made sure to lick the head of Carl’s erection and apply more pressure with his mouth to help distract his boyfriend from the uncomfortable sensation of his finger pushing itself inside. He massaged Carl’s entrance gently, spreading the lotion and pushing harder each time so he would gradually get used to it. Fortunately, he was a little looser than he had been the night before and after a few moments Jason had successfully slipped his finger inside Carl.

Carl gasped above him, not entirely sure about what sounds to make due to the duel stimulation he was experiencing. Jason’s own member throbbed as he noted how tight and warm Carl was around his finger. The idea of having that around him made his member throb and twitch with excitement. Advancing further than the night before, Jason slowly and carefully started to push in a second finger. This was wider than before and met more resistance with Carl hissing loudly above him. Jason kept his fingers still and bobbed his head a little faster, trying to bring Carl some more pleasure before continuing with the slightly painful activity.

Once Carl was moaning again, Jason pushed his second finger in slowly. Carl hissed and bucked his hips slightly but gasped once the digit was fully inside him. Carl was sweating under the hot spray of the shower and was breathing heavily from the uncomfortable yet strange feeling of having Jason’s fingers inside of him. Jason’s heart was pounding in his chest and if he hadn’t been kneeling, his legs would have been wobbling from nerves. He was trying his best not to hurt Carl in any way.

Jason experimented with moving his fingers around and smirked around Carl’s shaft when the younger teen let out a loud moan. He had managed to crook his fingers at an angle and had clearly found Carl’s prostate, the firm nub he had been searching for. Jason’s own member was leaking just from listening to Carl’s gasps and moans as he pressed against the nub harder and moved his head faster.

The whole performance was lovingly gentle and powerfully erotic. Unfortunately, due to Carl’s greater sensitivity in the mornings along with it being the first time he had ever been stimulated from both sides, it wasn’t long before he cried out Jason’s name and exploded in the older teen’s mouth. Carl gasped for breath as Jason removed his fingers slowly and swallowed down his lover’s offering.

“Oh my God.” Carl gasped, cuddling into Jason’s warm, wet body under the shower. “Is that what sex is like?”

Jason chuckled into Carl’s ear and kissed his neck. “Nope. Sex is even better.”

Carl groaned into the crook of Jason’s neck, unsure of how he’d be able to handle so much pleasure when the time came.

 

An hour later and they had washed and had breakfast. They were dressed and ready for the day. Jason continued to wear his jeans, shirt and leather jacket. Carl had opted for grey skinny jeans, his grey shirt with a chequered shirt on top along with a thick blue jacket and trademark hat. They had decided to start the day by taking Judith on a walk around the community.

Jason and Carl walked down the street with Judith in her pram. Carl pushed it, insisting that it should be him as he was the older brother. Jason couldn’t help but smile at how affectionate Carl was as a big brother. His love and care for children was something Kellin had shared which led Jason to believe it was something he subconsciously looked for. He loved sweet people.

Judith seemed to be enjoying the walk as she was rather quiet and spent most of the time watching the world pass by from her comfortable position inside the pram. It was another sunny day with a few patches of cloud here and there. They noticed the odd stare from one or two residents who obviously knew about them but weren’t comfortable with it. Jason scoffed mentally at them, it was nothing to do with them so they would be best not saying anything.

“Just think of what this place could become if we manage to defend it.” Jason started conversation. “Imagine the life she could have here.”

“Do you really think this place can last?” Carl asked, doubtful.

Jason nodded. “Yeah, I do. But not as it is right now.”

“Then we need to get them to change.” Carl commented, reminding Jason that the effort had to be made.

“That’s if they can change.” Jason answered, doubtful.

“They can. Everyone does.” Carl countered with a shrug.

“Here’s hoping they change soon and change fast.” Jason continued. “We need this place fortified against people.”

“How?” Carl asked, curious over what Jason had in mind.

“We need to raise the walls higher and secure the top to stop anyone climbing in.” Jason explained, looking around. “We could do with a couple more lookout points too.”

“What else?” Carl asked, pulling silly faces at Judith to keep the baby entertained.

“We need everyone inside the walls to be trained on how to survive and how to fight.” Jason explained. “No exceptions. Everyone should be as self-sufficient as possible.”

Carl remained silent. Jason had a point and the changes needed to be made. The real challenge was getting the Alexandria residents to open up to that change.

“They won’t be difficult changes to make but they are vital.” Jason finished. “Their naivety is going to get them all killed if we don’t change them.”

“We should go see Tara.” Carl commented, suddenly changing the subject.

Jason nodded and walked with Carl to the infirmary. It made sense as they had been about to walk past the building. They left Judith out on the porch, knowing that no one would hurt her and even if they tried the pram was visible through the windows. They stepped inside and were greeted by Pete who sat at his desk noting down a few things to himself.

“Hey, boys.” He greeted with a smile.

“Good morning.” Carl greeted pleasantly.

Jason still felt uncomfortable around Pete so instead of saying anything he merely nodded to the man. His eyes quickly moved away from the tall surgeon and fell on Tara who lay motionless in the bed. Her head was bandaged up and Eugene sat next to her. He hadn’t left her side.

“What’s her condition?” Jason asked Pete, trying to mask the hostility in his tone.

“Well, she’s stable for now. She’s got a fractured skull and she lost a lot of blood.” Pete explained. “All we can do now is wait for her to wake up.”

“And will she?” Carl asked, concern etched in his voice.

Pete nodded. “She should. Her chances are good.”

They both nodded in acknowledgement before going over to sit by her bedside. Jason sat right next to Eugene and smiled softly to the eccentric man. Eugene returned the smile and glanced at Tara before speaking.

“Good morning.” Eugene greeted.

“Morning.” Jason answered, holding Tara’s hand and stroking it with his thumb gently.

“She is one of the best friends I have ever had the pleasure of knowing in my life.” Eugene told them, clearly still shaken up by what happened. “If not for the medical expertise of Pete then her chances of survival would have been immitigable. He deserves our sincere and plenary gratitude.”

Carl was slightly lost because of the complexity of Eugene’s vocabulary but Jason managed to follow what he was saying. He never thought all those English classes he had taken would turn out to be useful in the apocalypse of all things.

“It’s not just Pete who should be praised.” Jason commented, surprising the large man. “If not for your efforts, she would have died in that warehouse with Noah and Aiden.”

“As veracious as your statement may be, if not for Pete’s surgical talents she would no longer be here now.” Eugene countered, refusing to accept praise for his actions.

“Eugene, regardless of Pete’s skills, if you hadn’t overcome your fear and carried her to the van then she would be dead.” Jason argued sternly. “You’re a hero. You are. And you deserve to be here just like the rest of us. You’ve earned your right to survive.”

“Thank you, though I firmly believe you are exaggerating the significance of my efforts.” Eugene replied, grateful but still lacking in confidence.

“I’m not exaggerating. I’m telling the truth.” Jason remarked. “In times of crisis and desperation, people show who they really are inside. Nicholas was a coward and ran. You were a hero and stayed.”

Eugene nodded, falling silent as he cast his gaze back down to Tara. The shudders of his shoulders showed that he was fighting the tears that were desperate to fall, so Jason placed his hand on Eugene’s back and rubbed it softly. They were all in it together and Eugene had surprised and impressed him. Tara’s survival was all thanks to the heroic actions of Eugene and the medical talents of Pete. Everyone was grateful for both.

 

Deanna stood over the gravestones of several Alexandrians. Their custom cemetery was small as they had not anticipated many deaths but it was starting to become a regular thing. The saddest part for Deanna was knowing that most of the graves didn’t even have bodies in them. Six graves were laid out in front of her and only two of them had bodies. The other four were those of Noah, Tony, Kevin and of her son, Aiden. It was Aiden’s grave she stood over.

After over fifteen minutes of searching for the short leader of the community, Rick finally found Deanna standing over the graves. He appeared from behind the row of conifer trees and walked up to her slowly, knowing that she was bereft.

“I’m sorry about what happened.” Rick commented as he kept a bit of distance between them. “How you holding up?”

Deanna sighed as she continued to stare at her son’s grave. “I’m not.”

“We have a problem with Pete.” Rick informed her. He knew this was the best way to deal with the man without being seen as a villain.

Deanna shook her head slowly. “I hoped it’d get better.”

Rick took a step forward in surprise and anger. “You knew? It hasn’t gotten better. It won’t.”

“Pete’s a surgeon.” Deanna reminded him, offering it as justification for not doing anything. “He’s saved lives, he might be saving Tara’s life.”

“He’s beating his wife.” Rick argued. “We have to stop it.”

“How?” Deanna asked, her arms still folded.

“We separate them.” Rick answered, trying to be reasonable. “We tell them that’s how it’ll be from now on.”

Deanna turned to face Rick and walked up to him. “What happens when he doesn’t want to do that?”

“It’s not his choice.” Rick retorted.

“So what happens?” Deanna asked again, her voice lower.

Rick thought about his answer for a moment before finally deciding to be honest. “I kill him. We kill him.”

“We don’t kill people.” Deanna hissed. “This is civilization, Rick.”

“Warning someone to stop or die?” Rick countered, narrowing his eyes. “That is civilised nowadays.”

Deanna turned her head away in disgust as Rick continued to glare at her, his head close to hers.

“So we what? We just let him hit her?” Rick challenged aggressively. “We let him kill her?”

“No. We exile him.” Deanna answered. “If it comes to that.”

“We do that we don’t know when he comes back and what he does to them.” Rick retorted cynically. “Letting him go makes this place vulnerable. You really wanna wait until someone in that tower has to take care of it and that’s if we’re lucky! Jason got back in, remember?”

“We are not executing anyone!” Deanna shouted back, losing her temper momentarily. “Don’t ever suggest it again. That sort of thinking doesn’t belong in here.”

“People die now, Deanna, they do.” Rick told her calmly, trying to educate her. “There are times like this where you can decide who and when. Or it can be decided for you.”

“It already was.” Deanna retorted venomously. “I wouldn’t kill you. I’d just send you away.”

“Like you did with Jason?” Rick hissed.

Deanna glared furiously at him. She was still angry at Jason’s attempt to blackmail her along with the murders of Tony and Kevin. She was already formulating a plan to turn the tables against him.

“No. I’d make sure it was done properly this time.” Deanna responded.

When Rick didn’t answer, the smaller woman lowered her gaze and walked past him. She didn’t want to even look at the man in that moment and just wanted to go home and sleep. She was distraught and tired. She didn’t need to be talking about executions.

Rick stood where he was, not even looking back at her as she walked away. He grit his teeth as he realised she was far too naïve to even entertain the possibility of his way being the right way. He didn’t understand the point of her accepting him and his group into the community if they were just going to be ignored at every turn. In Rick’s mind, the matter was settled. He was going to sort the problem with Pete one way or the other.

 

Jason and Carl were on their way back from the infirmary. They had tried to stay as long as possible but it hadn’t been long before Judith had started crying to be fed. Answering the whims of the little princess, as Jason so called her, both teens were on their way back to the house. They spotted a stern looking Rick emerge from the cemetery and waved to him. Rick waved back and headed in their direction so the boys stopped to wait for him.

“Hey, everything okay?” Rick asked them, knowing the answer would be a positive one.

Both of them nodded.

“Everything’s fine but Judith seems to be cranky in the mornings.” Jason commented with a laugh.

“It runs in the family, I think.” Rick remarked with a smile.

Rick reached into the pram and stroked Judith’s head and face affectionately. She was a symbol of hope and light in this very dark world. The baby was also a reminder of Lori and the mistakes he had made in keeping her safe. Rick vowed to never make the same mistakes and to make sure no one else in his family died.

“Should probably get her home before she starts screaming.” Rick told his son before casting his eyes on Jason. “Jason, do you mind if we talk?”

Jason seemed a little nervous at the sudden request but nodded. “Sure. Carl, I’ll see you back at the house, yeah?”

“Okay.” Carl nodded with a smile and continued down the road.

He was old enough to understand that some discussions had to be had in private. Though Carl didn’t like being excluded from the conversation he knew he could extract the information from Jason later on. As he approached the house, he noticed Enid climbing the wall yet again. He narrowed his eyes and decided he would go after her. He couldn’t let her be out there all alone.

“So, what did you want to talk about?” Jason asked the constable.

“What do you think about these people?” Rick asked him, his eyes narrow.

“Honest opinion?” Jason confirmed, wanting to make sure he understood the question.

Rick nodded but didn’t speak. Jason took a breath.

“Well, they’re weak and naïve. They don’t know how to survive or how to properly defend this place.” Jason commented, looking around almost in distaste. “But at least they’re not damaged by their experiences like I am. So I envy them in that sense.”

“What do you mean by damaged?” Rick asked, tilting his head slightly.

“Well, apart from the constant void in my heart where Kellin used to be.” Jason began, sighing as he confessed. “I’ve also been hallucinating.”

“Hallucinating?” Rick questioned.

“Yeah, that’s why I went missing sometimes.” Jason confessed. “Carl says you went through something similar before.”

Rick lowered his head, remembering his hallucinations of Lori at the prison before nodding. “Yeah, I did.”

“Well, it’s been happening to me too.” Jason continued. “But it seems to be getting better.”

Rick nodded and smiled. It was good news. “You say this place needs defending. Would you be willing to defend it?”

Jason narrowed his eyes at Rick. “What kind of question is that? You know I would.”

“Do you trust the people here?” Rick asked him cryptically.

“Generally, yeah.” Jason answered with a shrug. “They’re good people.”

“Is that why you have that gun in your jacket pocket?” Rick asked, earning a shocked look from Jason. “Carol told me you had it.”

“I never said I trusted them completely.” Jason countered.

Rick nodded. “So, what if you had to defend this place from the people here?”

“You’re asking what side I’d be on if something akin to civil war broke out, aren’t you?” Jason asked cynically.

Rick nodded once. “I know this place means a lot to you.”

“Rick, I’m with you all the way.” Jason answered. “Whatever keeps Carl safe, I’m with you.”

“Can I trust you not to speak to the others about this?” Rick questioned the teen, stepping forward.

Jason nodded. “Of course. This is between us.”

Rick nodded. “Carol, Daryl and I got together to plan a takeover. Carol and I have guns and I think we may need to act soon. These people don’t know what they’re doing.”

“And you’re asking me to help when the time comes?” Jason confirmed.

Rick nodded. “Will you?”

Jason took a breath and looked around. The community was safe and peaceful but the people were stubborn and weak. Something would have to happen.

“Of course.” Jason replied with a nod.

“Thank you.” Rick answered gruffly.  

 

Carl wandered through the woods, keeping his eyes and ears open for Enid but also for any signs of danger, be they living or dead. He didn’t understand why Enid spent such little time inside the safety of the walls and he wanted to know what it was all about. Carl couldn’t help but take interest in mysterious people, they always perked his natural curiosity.

“Carl!” Enid’s voice called out from somewhere nearby.

Carl scanned the area with his eyes but he couldn’t see her and he found it difficult to pinpoint where her voice was coming from.

“I know you’re following me. Again.” Enid told him, annoyed. “And you’re going the wrong way.”

“You knew?” Carl asked, surprised that she had always known he was trying to catch up to her.

“You’re very loud.” Enid commented, just as Carl stepped on a twig and snapped it. “Can you go back? To be honest, you scare me.”

“You shouldn’t sneak out by yourself.” Carl responded. “Two people just died.”

“Come on!” Enid retorted, stepping out into the open and surprising Carl. “People always die. You know that.”

“We should go back.” Carl insisted, not wanting to be outside too long himself.

“Why?” Enid asked, almost innocently despite being a loaded question.

Carl thought for a moment about a reasonable justification. “What do you do out here anyways?”

“Same thing as you.” Enid replied and took off running.

Carl smirked at her answer before running after her. They ran through the woods together, enjoying each other’s company along with the energetic rush the activity brought them. There was something peaceful and pleasurable about running through the woods together, no walkers, no worries, just running for the sake of it. Neither of them could wipe the smiles from their faces as they ran.

Their running came to a sudden stop when Enid halted herself and grabbed Carl’s arm to stop him as well. Ahead of them through the treeline was a lone walker, stumbling aimlessly through the vegetation. For the time being it was totally unaware of their presence but soon would be. Enid reached into her pocket and pulled out an egg timer that she wound up before throwing it at the walker.

The walker meandered looking for the source of the sound, completely lost until the egg timer went off and rang loudly through the woods. The walker snarled and shambled over to the timer, staring down at it in curiosity as it continued to ring loudly. With the walker distracted, she and Carl took off running in the opposite direction yet again.

 

When Jason entered the house he immediately noticed how quiet it was. Carol was babysitting Judith, something she usually did when Carl wasn’t around to do it instead. This meant that Carl wasn’t in the house.

“Have you seen Carl?” Jason asked Carol, his mind trying to work out where he could be.

“He brought Judith in and then went back out in a hurry.” Carol told him. “Is everything alright?”

Jason thought for a moment before nodding. “Yeah, I know where he is. Thanks.”

Jason headed back out and closed the door behind him. He quickly darted into the armoury, ignoring Olivia’s ramblings by telling her that he was going out for some target practice. Target practice was the last thing he needed but she didn’t know that so it was enough to stop her interrogating him.

By collecting his holster and gun from the armoury it allowed him to go through the gates normally. The woman who was on gate duty didn’t question him going outside the wall as he was visibly armed. Once the front gate closed behind him, Jason took off running into the woods. He had to find Carl who no doubt was following Enid. Again.

 

Glenn walked up to the parked van that they had used on the supply run. Nicholas was busy cleaning the dried blood off the floor of the van. The blood belonged to Tara, who was still hanging on by a thread after Aiden’s carelessness almost killed them all. Glenn couldn’t afford to have any more deaths on his conscience and decided he had to make a point.

“Nicholas, don’t talk, just listen.” Glenn told the man, who put down the cloth and raised his shoulders, tense. “Those four people you lost on that run, that’s on you. And Noah, that’s on you too.”

Nicholas glared back at the Asian man, not welcoming the lecture.

“Those five lives, you have to carry that. People like you are supposed to be dead but these walls went up just in time, so you’re not.” Glenn continued, his voice low and threatening. “You don’t go outside those walls anymore. Not by yourself. Not with anyone else. And that’s how you’re gonna survive.”

Nicholas contorted his face with rage. “Who the hell do you think you are?”

“I’m someone who knows who you are.” Glenn told him, referring to his hidden cowardly nature. “I know what you did and it’s not gonna happen again.”

“I’ve been protecting this place, helping to provide for it. You’ve just got here!” Nicholas retorted angrily.

Glenn was unintimidated. “Don’t forget what I said.”

“Are you threatening me?” Nicholas asked defensively.

Glenn snorted with amusement. “No. I’m saving you.”

Glenn let his message hang in the air before walking away from Nicholas, continuing down the road while the curly haired man stood and thought about what Glenn had just said to him.

 

Carl and Enid slowed their run to a walk before finally stopping. They were tired and needed to catch their breath. Fortunately, they were in a quiet area of the woodland where there were no walkers or people, so they sat down against a fallen log. They sat side by side, breathing heavily as they calmed their bodies down from the exertion, still smiling. Unknown to either of them, Jason had caught up to them and was watching from a distance.

“We’re supposed to be out here. We’re supposed to feel like this.” Enid commented. “I don’t wanna forget. And running makes me feel better.”

“I can’t forget.” Carl replied with a shake of his head. “I dream about it, being in the forest with them.”

Enid was silent for a moment before confessing. “I do too.”

Carl stared at her, surprised they shared the same dreams. They had more in common than Carl originally expected. He was growing more and more interested in her and suddenly felt guilty. He was looking at her the same way he used to look at Jason when they didn’t really know each other.

“Ron’s a good guy.” Carl commented with a heavy breath, remembering that Enid was also in a relationship.

Enid smiled. “He is. So is Jason, I guess.”

Carl smiled back. “He is, he’s just…complicated.”

Enid nodded, understanding exactly what Carl meant with the word. “Did he finally tell you about the hallucinations?”

Carl was surprised by the question but was quick to answer. “Yeah, he did. He’s getting better, I think.”

“That’s good.” Enid remarked. She knew the older teen hated her for some bizarre reason and she did her best to avoid him at all costs.

“So, does Ron know you come out here?” Carl asked, bringing the subject back to Enid.

Enid shook her head. “No, he wouldn’t understand.”

Carl nodded. Ron wouldn’t understand half of the things they do and think because he had never had to survive like they had. Carl and Enid were kindred spirits in that sense, they were both young survivors. It crossed Carl’s mind that Enid could potentially have a lot in common with Jason as well.

“You should try to get to know Jason.” Carl commented fondly. “I think you two might have a lot in common.”

“He hates me.” Enid retorted curtly.

Carl shook his head. “He doesn’t. He just doesn’t trust you.”

“Well, I don’t trust him.” Enid replied, her tone ending the discussion.

She reached into her bag and pulled out a large hunting knife.

“Why do I scare you?” Carl asked with a nervous laugh, recalling what she had said before.

Enid shrugged as she started carving marks into the log. “I don’t know, you just do.”

“Cool knife.” Carl commented, watching her carve into the bark.

Enid stopped what she was doing and studied the steel blade. “It was my mum’s.”

Carl stared at her as she resumed her carving. Awful things had clearly happened to her. “What happened to you? Before you got there?”

“Does it matter?” Enid hissed lowly, the emotional wounds still fresh.

“It does. I know.” Carl answered, trying to appeal with common ground. “Something bad has happened to me too.”

They stared at each other for a moment before they heard the familiar rasps and snarls of approaching walkers. They whipped round to try and spot where they were coming from, forcing Jason to duck behind a tree so he wouldn’t be spotted as well. Enid and Carl stood up as the sound of the walkers got louder and louder.

“We need to go, it sounds like a lot.”  Carl told her, knowing they wouldn’t defeat a group on their own.

Enid grabbed her bag and ran over to one of the larger trees that were close by. Carl followed her as she squeezed inside the tree trunk, taking off his hat so he could make it inside. The tree trunk was not very wide and left very little room between them as they stood facing each other.

Jason moved from behind the tree and dived down to the ground. The walkers were extremely close and by the loud noise and the repulsive smell, he knew he didn’t have enough bullets to kill them all. He crawled along the ground and pulled himself inside a fallen log. This allowed him to remain hidden from the walkers while still keeping an eye on Carl and Enid. All three of them watched the walker herd from their respective hiding spots.

“It’s their world now.” Enid whispered in Carl’s ear. “We’re just living in it.”

As he watched them all shamble past slowly, Jason was glad he hadn’t decided to fight them. There were far too many walkers for him to handle on his own, with over thirty of the hungry corpses stumbling through the woods. His Operator handgun only held seven bullets and his hidden Taurus only had thirteen bullets left. Jason kept himself low and silent, hoping that neither the walkers nor Carl and Enid would notice him.

As they hid inside the tree, Carl turned his gaze away from the walkers and had it settle on Enid. They stared at each other, examining their faces and eyes as their faces were caressed by the puffs of each other’s breath. Carl felt nervous, his legs and hands shaking from the position he was in. There was that same feeling he had felt back in the church coursing through him. Desire. He wanted to close the gap and kiss Enid but he knew he couldn’t. He loved Jason and didn’t really know Enid. Carl knew he cared for her but as nothing more than a friend. Reminding himself of that did nothing to stop the butterflies in his stomach.

Enid wasn’t helping his situation in any way. She just stared back at him, right into his eyes and occasionally at his lips. He couldn’t tell if Enid wanted him to kiss her or not, all he knew was that she was making it clear that it was an option. She just stood there staring and waiting. If they were going to kiss then it would need to be Carl who made the first move. As much as he wanted to, he knew the guilt would destroy him. He wouldn’t do that to Jason. Carl let out a strong breath that he didn’t know he had been holding and looked away from Enid.

Enid smiled and whispered in his ear again. “Cool. You’re afraid of me too.”

Jason had watched the whole situation pan out. He was proud and grateful that Carl had resisted the urge to kiss the girl. He understood that Enid was attractive and he could tell Carl was interested in her on some level. However, Jason was furious that Enid was playing this game with Carl, using his inexperience to trick him into cheating. He didn’t know why she was doing it but he vowed to make her suffer for it all the same.

Jason’s anger gave way to confusion when his eye caught the sight of the last walker in the herd, the lone straggler. He had been an older man, probably around the fifty mark when he had turned. His clothes were dark, dirty, blood stained and torn. What was odd about the faltering corpse was the large W that had been carved into its forehead. Jason had never seen something like that before and was instantly curious as to what it meant.

 

Rick walked round the back of the Anderson house to the garage. Inside the garage was Jessie, sat on a stool smoking a cigarette. Rick didn’t know Jessie smoked. She was too busy smoking to notice him.

“Jessie.” Rick alerted her to his presence.

“Hey.” Jessie replied, stubbing out the cigarette in an ashtray on the table. “I don’t want Ron and Sam to know about those.”

“Your secret is safe.” Rick told her with a dismissive wave of his hand.

Jessie nodded, visibly upset. “Noah was a sweet kid but Tara, she’s in good hands with Pete.”

“He’s hitting you.” Rick stated coldly.

Jessie glared back in shock. She had no idea Rick knew about Pete’s abuse nor could she figure out how he had learned about it.

“He’s hurting you.” Rick continued. “It has to stop.”

Jessie knew this would get nasty if she didn’t stop Rick. “It will.”

“How?” Rick asked quickly. He knew what she was trying to do.

“There are things in his life that happened…” Jessie tried to explain the reason for his alcoholism.

“I don’t care.” Rick interrupted her. Nothing was an excuse to be abusive.

“Look, it was like this before and he got help.” Jessie explained. “I helped him and things were good.”

Rick breathed out impatiently. He knew that would have been with professionals, doctors and social workers. In Alexandria there weren’t any authorities or specialist groups that could help a man like Pete.

“I can fix it.” Jessie declared.

“No, you can’t.” Rick responded with a shake of his head. “But I can.”

Jessie shook her head. “No, no. What can you do? What are you gonna do? You gonna put him in jail?”

Rick remained silent. His solution was far more permanent than jail. Jessie seemed to pick up on his intentions.

“You’re only gonna make things worse.” She argued.

“If it’s gotten worse it means he’s killed you.” Rick retorted bluntly. “That’s what’s next and I’m not gonna let that happen.”

Jessie was touched by his concern but also angered by it. “Why do you care? Why is this so important to you?”

Rick was silent. He didn’t know how to answer that question. To say it was part of his job would make his intentions less sincere and would also be a lie. To admit that he cared about her for more personal reasons would make it all seem like a selfish power trip.

“Now, you’ve made it. You have a home for your kids.” Jessie continued, irritated by his silence. “Rick, what are you doing?”

Rick finally broke his silence, struggling to keep his voice level. “I’m trying to help.”

Jessie shook her head aggressively, she had figured him out. “I don’t know that. I’m married! I can take care of myself. We have to take care of ourselves.”

Rick didn’t know what to say as he watched her head for the door. She was going to go back inside but before she did she hit the switch to close the garage door, leaving Rick out in the street.

 

As Carl and Enid approached the gate they both jumped when something rustled the leaves nearby. Jason stepped out from behind a large tree and feigned surprise upon seeing them. They looked at him with a mix of confusion and suspicion.

“Hey, Carl. Didn’t know you were out here too.” Jason commented with a false smile. “Hey there, Enid.”

“Hi.” Enid replied curtly.

“What are you doing out here?” Carl asked his older lover. He knew Jason only went out when he had a reason.

“Oh, I just felt like a walk outside the claustrophobia of those walls.” Jason answered as they all walked together. “Staying locked up in there can drive a guy insane, you know?”

Carl didn’t feel comfortable with how Jason was speaking. He knew the older teen well enough to know that all his answers were false and his friendly tone was an act. He knew it was because Enid was there and wondered if Jason had the wrong impression.

“I guess you’re still seeing things then.” Enid finally spoke up, challenging Jason with a touch of hostility.

Jason nodded, a smirk creeping round the corner of his mouth. “I see a lot of things these days, yeah.”

Jason knew that Carl would have probably understood exactly what he meant by that. He was hoping Enid still thought he was talking about his hallucinations and not the fact that he had bared witness to Enid and Carl getting too close in the tree.

Carl felt rather annoyed with Jason at this point. He had been outside the walls with a friend to make sure she was safe. They had some fun and had enjoyed their time together. Although Carl felt guilty about how he had looked at Enid for a few moments, he never acted on those feelings because his love for Jason was stronger. He had already told Jason that he wasn’t allowed to be jealous. They were going to have a talk when they got home.

 

Rick walked down the street leading to the main road that ran through Alexandria. Jessie had refused his help, realising that it was in part influenced by his attraction to her. He would have to wait for Pete to do something and try to catch him in the act. The more he thought about waiting the less he liked it. If he was late or missed his opportunity then Jessie would be dead and it would be his fault for not acting. As Sam ran past him with his toy boat, an idea struck him on how to convince Jessie. Rick glanced back at Jessie’s house and decided to try one last approach.

Rick opened the front door and walked into her living room, finding Jessie still upset as she was wiping tears from her eyes. The sight of him entering the house only upset her further. She shook her head as he walked up to her.

“What are you doing?” She whined.

“You know, Sam asked for a gun to protect you.” Rick told her, his voice cracking at the thought of her life being that much in danger.

Jessie started crying just from hearing that. “You shouldn’t be here.”

“Jessie, in here, you can’t see it but it’s the same, it’s the same as out there.” Rick told her, fighting to keep his voice normal. “We have food and roofs over our heads but you don’t get to just live. You don’t get to put it off or wish it away, Jessie.”

Jessie remained silent as Rick continued to plead with her, stepping closer and closer to her.

“If, if you don’t fight, you die.” Rick continued, his voice cracking again. “And I don’t want you to die.”

Jessie was stunned by his confession. He may not have been directly admitting to his feelings but they were as clear as day.

“I can help you. I can keep you and your boys safe. I can.” Rick pleaded with her. “All you have to do is say yes.”

Jessie swallowed heavily as she tried to make her decision. Rick’s intense stare was making her nervous but his conviction did make her feel a little safer.

“Would you do this for someone else?” Jessie asked him, she had to be sure. “Would you do this for anyone?”

Rick lowered his head, he only cared for those in his close circle. “No.”

Jessie drew in a breath. Rick was only going to deal with Pete because he cared about her. It was clear he cared about her and her children more than Pete himself did. After years of torment, years of violence, pain, misery and abuse, Jessie just wanted it to stop. She no longer wanted to feel afraid in her own home.

“Yes.” Jessie stated softly but confidently.

Rick nodded. It had been decided. He would take care of Pete the next time he saw him. Rick vowed to do whatever it took, even if it meant killing the man.

“Rick?” Pete’s voice made them both jump. “What are you doing here?”

Rick and Jessie watched the drunken man emerge from the doorway and walk into the room. His body language was aggressive. He knew something serious was happening between his wife and the community’s constable. Something serious in his house.

“Pete…” Jessie greeted, more as a warning.

“What are you doing here?” Pete repeated, his glare fixed on Rick.

“Listen to me.” Jessie started, walking towards her husband.

“I’m going to have to ask you to leave, Rick.” Pete told Rick coldly. Rick remained where he was, silent.

“No.” Jessie told the tall man.

“Excuse me?” Pete asked incredulously.

Jessie trembled but stood her ground as Pete approached her. “You need to leave.”

“What are you talking about?” Pete hissed, looking down at her.

Jessie appeared almost bored. “Just go, Pete.”

Pete glanced at Rick. “What have you been saying to each other? Huh? What have you been doing?!”

Jessie flinched as Pete shouted right in her face, expecting to be hit.

“Pete, you and me are gonna leave now.” Rick told the man, finally speaking up.

“You come into my house.” Pete hissed angrily.

“Pete, you and me are leaving.” Rick repeated louder this time.

“You’re leaving right now! You think you’re the law?” Pete growled venomously. “You actually think you have a say in anything here?”

Rick didn’t like how close Pete was getting to him. “Step back.”

“Who the hell do you think you are?” Pete roared.

“Someone’s who’s trying not to kill you!” Rick retorted furiously.

Pete suddenly swung his fist at Rick who managed to duck it in time as Jessie screamed for Pete to stop. Rick countered with a punch of his own, striking Pete square in the jaw but the taller man bounced back with a strong back hand that momentarily stunned Rick. Pete was stronger than he had anticipated.

“You wanna stop now?” Rick warned him. This would be his final warning.

Pete grabbed Rick and pushed him up against the living room wall, grabbing at his shoulder and collar while Rick tried to grab at the other man’s neck.

“Come into my house?” Pete growled as he slammed Rick’s head against the wall.

“Pete! Stop it!” Jessie shouted at the man but her cries fell on deaf ears.

Pete slammed Rick’s head against the wall again before the constable managed to get his left arm round the left side of Pete’s head. With new leverage, Rick managed to push the man off balance and slam him down into the coffee table, smashing the glass and breaking the wooden legs. Both men continued to grab and punch one another as they lay in the shards of glass while Jessie watched on in horror.

Rick stood up as Pete punched him in the head, causing him to stumble. The taller man pushed Rick up against the fireplace, knocking over a vase which was sent crashing to the floor. Rick responded with some punches to the abdomen and face. When Pete let go, Rick grabbed the man’s torso and pushed him backwards, rushing him so he went over the couch and was sent crashing through the window with Rick close behind.

As they fought their way out into the middle of the street, their fight attracted the attention of the other residents in the community. Reginald could be heard shouting on Deanna as other members of the community rushed towards the fight. They had to find out what was going on and put an end to it quickly.

Rick had Pete on his back on the road, his hands around Pete’s neck in an effort to strangle him. The taller man, having the advantage of longer arms, managed to smack Rick in the face before receiving a strong punch in return. Rick tried to push Pete’s hands away from his neck while reaching for the taller man’s throat.

Jason, Carl and Enid had heard the commotion from the front gate and were running up the street towards the fight. Carl was in shock at seeing his father attacking Pete for what seemed to be no reason. Jason wasn’t so surprised, he knew there was something odd about Pete as he had never liked the man. He figured his instincts hadn’t been wrong and Rick had found out what it was.

Jessie cried while Sam ran behind Carol for safety as the two men continued to fight. Rick tried to gouge out Pete’s eyes but the taller man managed to stop him from doing so. Both of them continued to grunt and growl with exertion as Pete managed to flip them over so he was above Rick, it was his turn to press Rick’s head into the ground. His hands reached for Rick’s throat in an attempt to strangle him just like the dark haired man had attempted on him moments before. Rick kept his own hands round Pete’s throat to stop him from strengthening his grip too much.

Jessie rushed over and tried to pull Pete off of Rick. Pete was taller and had longer arms so he would inevitably win if Rick remained under him. Without hesitation Pete smacked her away with his left hand, striking her face and knocking her to the ground with a cry of pain. This served to infuriate Rick more. He kneed Pete in the groin before flipping them over again. Blood gushed from the wounds on their heads and faces as Rick managed to get into a position where he could strangle Pete again. The taller man found it harder to defend against this new position as his hands were unable to reach up to Rick’s throat.

Jason continued to watch the fight unfold, knowing that if he was Rick he wouldn’t want anyone interrupting it. Before he could react, Carl charged towards the struggling pair, ignoring Jason’s orders to stop. Carl grabbed Rick’s shoulders, telling him to stop.

“Dad, get off him!” Carl demanded.

Rick uncharacteristically pushed Carl away. He didn’t hurt the boy nor did he knock him off his feet but it was enough to keep him away. Jason quickly caught him and made sure he was okay as he watched Pete punch Rick again. Rick knew he would get pinned down again if he maintained the same position so he surprised Pete by rolling to his side. He landed behind Pete and wrapped his arm around the man’s neck in a messy choke hold. Pete gasped for breath as Rick finally had the upper hand in their fight.

“Stop it! Stop it! Right now!” Deanna demanded as Rick looked up at her, momentarily broken out of his adrenaline fuelled trance.

“Touch them again and I’ll kill you.” Rick hissed venomously in Pete’s ear as Nicholas and Glenn finally arrived to the growing circle around the fight.

“Dammit, Rick! I said stop!” Deanna bellowed angrily.

Nicholas, Tobin and Glenn started to move towards them as they knew it was time to separate them but froze in place when Rick pulled out the Colt Detective Special revolver.

“Or what?” Rick challenged them, frightening the crowd. “You gonna kick me out?”

Jason instinctively stood in front of Carl, shielding him in case anything went wrong. He knew Rick would never shoot at his own people but all it would take is for a struggle to begin and the trigger to be pulled.

“Put that gun down, Rick.” Deanna pleaded, her hands raised and her face pale with fear.

Rick breathed heavily as he glared at them all, blood running down his face as Pete crawled away slowly. They were all looking at him like he was the villain, they weren’t learning nor were they listening to anything he had to say.

“You still don’t get it. None of you do!” Rick shouted at them.

He looked around at them all before turning back to Deanna, his expression fierce and the revolver still raised in his hand.

“We know what needs to be done and we do it, we’re the ones who live. You!” Rick shouted, making them jump as he raised the gun again. “You just sit and plan and hesitate. You pretend like you know when you don’t!”

Rick glared at them angrily. In the silence of the moment they could all hear Sasha firing her silenced rifle at walkers that were banging on the walls. It acted as a reminder of the ever present threat that existed outside the walls and helped to hammer home Rick’s point even more.

“We wish things weren’t what they are. But you wanna live? You want this place to stay standing?” Rick continued angrily, glaring at Deanna. “You’re way of doing things is done! Things don’t just get better because you _want_ them to!”

Despite Deanna’s shock, fear and disgust towards Rick in that moment, along with many of the Alexandrians who were cowering in fear, Jason couldn’t help but smirk. This was what he had been trying to tell the likes of Deanna and Trisha all along. He was glad Rick had an audience, even if he was crazed from the fight and adrenaline. Glancing to his left, he saw that Carol was also smirking subtly.

“Starting right now, we need to live in the real world.” Rick told them, calming down a little before gesturing to Pete. “We have to control who lives here!”

“That’s never been more clear to me than it is right now.” Deanna answered sternly. She was angry and she was tired of being treated like an idiot.

Rick looked back up at her and tapped his chest with his hands in surprise, laughing incredulously. “Me? Me? You mean, you mean _me_?”

Deanna didn’t answer, she just continued to stare back at him. She had been blackmailed and threatened by Jason. Two of her people were dead because of Jason and the young man in question had almost killed Nicholas. Now she had Rick in front of her waving a gun around after attempting to kill Pete. She would no longer tolerate the extreme actions of this group.

“Your way is gonna destroy this place. It’s gonna get people killed, it’s already gotten people killed.” Rick criticised angrily. “I’m not gonna stand by and just let it happen! If you don’t fight, you die! I’m not gonna stand by and…”

Rick was cut off when Michonne suddenly rushed up and smacked him on the back of the head as hard as she could. Rick collapsed to the floor unconscious, having been taken completely off guard by the attack. She picked up the revolver in case he woke up. Everyone stared at Michonne with a mix of confusion, shock and relief. She stared back, afraid that the damage had already been done by Rick to destroy the relationship between the two groups. Nothing was going to be the same after this.

 

**So there we go, chapter 23 is finally complete. Turned out a bit shorter than I had anticipated it would be but that’s okay. Chapter 24 will more than make up for it.**

**So, Jason and Carl are continuing to advance their relationship and Rick has trusted Jason with the coup. Rick’s angry explosion at the end of the chapter will have severe repercussions for the group, especially Jason as Deanna’s patience has run out.**

**Worth noting that there’s a few Easter eggs in this chapter, as usual. Can you spot them?**

**As always, let me know what you think in the comments/reviews.**

**Chapter 24 has been planned and will be up as soon as possible. Who else is hyped for Season 6?**

**Thanks for all the kudos/votes/favourites/follows/bookmarks/subscriptions etc.**

**Thanks to the reviewers of chapter 22: The Sorrowful Deity, Youngblooded, The_Man_Called_Madara, jar98, Sara_94, super fan and a special mention to Dark.SKY27.**

**See you all in chapter 24 ^^**


	24. Sacrifice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Deanna holds a meeting to discuss whether Rick should be exiled. Meanwhile, Jason has better plans for the evening.

The sun was slowly setting beyond the horizon, casting brilliant and vibrant displays of colour into the sky, orange, blue and even purple. In the trees below, the birds who usually sang their daily chorus had quietened down as they returned to their nests for the night while the night time predators such as the owls were waking up. The evening brought with it a chilling breeze that contradicted the warmth of the day that had just ended. Silence was slowly descending upon the community of Alexandria.

There was tension in the air after the fight between Rick and Pete. The lingering tension was caused by Rick’s seemingly crazed rantings while aiming a revolver at several residents including Deanna. As a result, Michonne had knocked him unconscious and after having his wounds seen to by Rosita, he was locked inside an unfinished townhouse that was used as Alexandria’s unofficial holding cell. Michonne opted to watch over him as he had yet to wake up from the hit to the head.

Pete had also been seen to by Rosita. He was still angry and uncooperative. Deanna had seen that Rick was right and action had to be taken against their abusive surgeon. Pete had been placed in another house, one that was empty and away from where the rest of his family lived. It would give him time to think over his actions and would give Jessie, Ron and Sam some time without the stress, fear and pain Pete caused them in their day to day lives.

Dinner in the shared Grimes household was also silent compared to the usual. Jason, Carl and Glenn sat at the dining table as they finished their evening meals with the only attempts at conversation being made by Judith who was fed by Carol. They were all lost in their own thoughts as they all were well aware that Rick’s actions would have serious consequences for all of them. The trust that the community had for the group could have already been damaged irreparably.

A knock on the front door brought them out of their thoughts. Jason had been the first one to finish eating so he got up and walked over to the door before opening it. On the other side of the doorway stood a very stern faced Deanna. She stepped into the house without saying a word to Jason, clearly still angry with him over the blackmail and generally distrusting of the group as a whole. Gabriel had warned her and Rick had proven the warning to be valid.

“I just came by to inform you all that I’ve organised a meeting tomorrow night.” Deanna told them. “Whoever wants to attend is more than welcome.”

“What’s the meeting about?” Carol asked her timidly with a friendly smile, still holding Judith in her arms.

“About what happened today and what it means for the future.” Deanna answered vaguely.

There was a tense silence in the room. They all knew what Deanna really meant to say. It was going to be a meeting about Rick and what to do with him, which could mean he would be exiled along with other members of the group. If that happened, all of them would be exiled because they refused to go anywhere without him.

Deanna turned her attention to Jason as she made her way to the door. “Jason, I’d like you to come with me.”

“What for?” Jason asked, his eyes narrowed with suspicion.

“I have something I need to ask you about.” Deanna told him. “So please, come with me now. It won’t take long.”

Jason glanced back at Carl who gave him a quiet nod. He had Carl’s permission to leave him for the time being. He shrugged and followed Deanna out the door, closing it behind him.

 

Jason sat on the big chair in Deanna’s living room. The former politician had her video camera set up on its tripod as it recorded their discussion. Deanna had brought him there to interrogate him over a couple things she had been made aware of and wanted to have video evidence for the sake of transparency.

“Someone informed me that you’re not teaching the kids what you should be.” Deanna began, sitting back on her sofa. “Is that true?”

“Well, that depends, really.” Jason answered vaguely, sitting back with his arms folded.

“Depends on what?” Deanna pushed.

“On what you think I should be teaching them.” Jason replied. “Because I’m teaching them what I think they should be learning.”

“You were given the job under the conditions that you would continue their studies. Mathematics, English, History.” Deanna stated, citing some examples. “Instead, you have spent that time teaching children how to handle weapons and be violent.”

Jason unfolded his arms and leaned forward. “It sounds horrible when you put it that way but let’s be honest, they are teenagers, young adults, not kids.”

“Regardless. Only the recruiters and supply runners need to know such things.” Deanna explained. “The young people here don’t need those lessons. Why teach them?”

Jason sighed and rolled his eyes. “Because they do need those lessons. Everyone needs to know these things.”

Deanna glared back, angered by his attitude. “We have the walls to keep us safe. They have kept us safe since the start.”

Jason scoffed at this. “And what happens when those walls fall? Or a walker slips in through the gate? Or someone in here dies in their sleep and turns?”

Deanna looked back at him, visibly confused by his final statement.

“Oh, you don’t know, do you?” Jason questioned. “It doesn’t matter how you die. You come back as one of them. Everyone in here is a ticking time bomb.”

“Why didn’t you inform the parents or anyone else about what you were doing?” Deanna continued her interrogation.

“And have this debate over a dozen times?” Jason retorted with a dismissive shake of his head. “No thank you.”

“I think many would argue that you don’t have the right to decide what they should be taught.” Deanna challenged him. “What makes you think that you have that right?”

“Because when things go bad, they’ll survive. They won’t be cannon fodder.” Jason told her sternly. “If they survive, then I’d say the end more than justifies the means.”

“So you’re doing this in case things go bad?” Deanna wanted him to clarify.

“I’m doing this for when things go back.” Jason corrected her. “It’s not a question of if, it’s a question of when.”

They glared at each other for a few moments before Deanna came to her decision.

“As of right now, you are suspended.” She told him coldly. “You are not to teach any of the children until I have spoken with all of the families.”

Jason sighed and folded his arms again, leaning back in the chair and staring up at the ceiling. A part of him found it almost amusing how stubbornly naïve these people were. To him, it was like Deanna wanted the place to fall and everyone to die with her nostalgic clinginess to the old world.

“Don’t take too long.” Jason remarked, not looking at her. “Wouldn’t want something to happen in that time.”

“You’re rather disrespectful for someone who is lucky to still be here.” Deanna commented, her irritation getting the better of her.

“Well, if you actually dealt with problems instead of pretending to then I wouldn’t have had those fights.” Jason retorted quickly.

“You killed two of our own because they were exiling you.” Deanna told him, deciding to expose the truth on the recording. “Then you threatened me to let you stay.”

“I see your inner politician is coming out, that was a politician’s twist if I ever heard one.” Jason countered sharply, glaring at her. “You tried to exile me in secret. The two men you had exile me tried to kill me so I killed them. They weren’t heroes and their deaths weren’t tragic in the slightest.”

“How do you think their families feel?” Deanna asked him, trying to guilt trip him.

“They feel a damn sight better with the lie I told them rather than the actual truth.” Jason retorted curtly. “But if you like, I can tell everyone that those men were a pair of bastards who died because you made the wrong call.”

“Do you feel no remorse for what you did?” Deanna questioned, surprised by how blunt the teen was being.

“I’ve killed fourteen people by now, Deanna.” Jason told her. “Three of which were euthanasia. The rest deserved it.”

Deanna glared at him. “Deserved it how?”

“They all tried to kill me.” Jason told her. “Using this against me is going to get you nowhere.”

“We’ll see.” Deanna retorted.

“Yeah, we will.” Jason spat back.

 

Jason sighed as the front door closed behind him. His patience for Deanna was wearing thin and he didn’t know how the community would react to the truth if she told them. In his mind, that would be political suicide for her but she knew the people there better than he did. He grinded his teeth as he thought about Trisha. She had reported his lessons to Deanna. He’d remember to have another word with her.

“What did Deanna want?” Carol asked Jason from where she sat with Judith.

Jason looked up and looked around before he spoke to her. Carol could tell what was going through his mind.

“Carl’s upstairs reading comics.” Carol told him. “So, what did she want?”

“She’s angry that I’ve been teaching the teenagers how to defend themselves.” Jason told her, sitting beside her and sighing. “So I’ve been suspended until she speaks to all the parents.”

“They’ll all agree with her.” Carol commented. “These people are weak and stupid.”

“We all were at some point.” Jason reminded her. “But it’s as if they don’t want to learn.”

“Which is why Rick, Daryl and I have our plan.” Carol told him, lowering her voice.

Jason nodded, staring back at her seriously. “Rick mentioned that, yeah. It might be necessary, especially if they try to kick him out.”

Carol nodded as she placed Judith in her cot. “You should keep a low profile for now. If anything is going to happen, it’ll happen at the meeting tomorrow.”

“Yeah, that’s true.” Jason replied as he rubbed his knees.

“You still have your gun, don’t you?” Carol questioned.

Jason nodded, opening his jacket to show the handle poking out of the inside pocket.

“Good. You’re probably going to need it.” Carol continued. “Don’t do anything unless we tell you to.”

Jason nodded. “Got it. I might spend tomorrow night watching over Carl and Judith.”

“Why?” Carol asked quickly.

“Because someone has to and I probably won’t be very welcome at the meeting.” Jason answered with a shrug. “If I hear anything I’ll come running.”

“The meeting is going to be their last chance to accept the truth.” Carol told him. “If they don’t take that chance then we will have to take this place.”

Jason stood up, preparing to join Carl upstairs. “Whatever keeps everyone safe. I’m on your side for this.”

“Try to get a good sleep.” Carol called after him as he walked away.

Jason paused at the base of the staircase. “You too.”

Jason made his way up the staircase and down the hall to the room he shared with Carl. He knocked once before opening the door and closing it behind him. As Carol had said, he found Carl lying back on the bed reading a comic. Jason smiled to him as he entered the room and started changing out of his clothes.

“Hey.” Carl greeted flatly, looking up from his comic for a moment.

“Hey.” Jason greeted as he sat down on the bed beside Carl.

Jason studied Carl’s intense expression. He was forcing himself to be as engrossed in his comic as possible and he knew Carl well enough to know why. Carl was trying to use the comic as a way to escape from everything that was happening around him. Jason placed his hand gently on Carl’s shoulder to get his attention.

“Your dad’s gonna be fine, you know that, right?” Jason asked him softly.

Carl sighed, the mix of emotions heavy on his heart. “Yeah…”

Jason leaned forward until Carl met his stare, getting momentarily lost in each other’s eyes as they sat in silence. The older teen gently shifted himself closer to his younger lover.

“I know that look, Carl.” Jason told him. “What’re you thinking about?”

“Do you think Deanna is going to kick my Dad out like she did with you?” Carl asked, concerned for his father and what it meant for the group.

Jason nodded. “I think she’s going to try.”

“How can we stop her?” Carl asked, worry creeping into his thoughts.

Jason sighed. “Well, tomorrow night’s meeting could be a good place to convince everyone that we know what we’re doing and they need to change.”

“What happens if they don’t?” Carl questioned, worrying about the worst case scenario.

“If they don’t then we may need to take it by force.” Jason answered honestly. “They’ll all die if things stay the same.”

“I don’t want them to die.” Carl commented, closing his eyes. “We have to help them survive.”

“And we will.” Jason told him, stroking his hair for a few silent moments. “Thank you, Carl.”

“For what?” Carl opened his eyes and stared back in confusion.

“You saved me from the monster inside me.” Jason explained, stroking his cheek. “And you helped me overcome the hallucinations because I feel comfortable not being alright.”

Carl smiled, tilting his head against Jason’s hand. “You’ve helped me a lot too.”

“I love you, Carl.” Jason confessed for the umpteenth time and kissed the other teen.

Carl mumbled into the kiss something that sounded like “love you too” before leaning into the kiss more. The two of them sat for a few moments, eyes closed while holding hands and the back of their necks as their tongues teased each other. There was something so simple yet so special about the kisses they shared. It gave the feelings inside their hearts an opening where they could be physically expressed in the most gentle of ways.

When they broke apart, Carl’s finger traced over Jason’s chest. “Why were you acting weird at the gate?”

“Oh, that…” Jason muttered as he realised what the subject matter was.

“Yeah, that.” Carl pressed. “I wish you’d give Enid a chance, she’s really nice.”

“Believe me, I noticed.” Jason remarked with a sarcastic smirk.

Carl glared at his boyfriend. “What’s your problem?”

“My problem is that she wanted you to kiss her inside that tree.” Jason revealed, deciding to be honest. “And for a moment, I thought you were going to.”

“You were watching us?” Carl questioned with a gasp of surprise. He felt betrayed.

“I came looking for you.” Jason explained. “I was about to talk to you when that herd came through and forced me to hide.”

“But you saw?” Carl confirmed.

Jason nodded. “Yeah, I saw and I didn’t like it.”

Carl felt hurt. He did feel guilty about having the temptation to kiss Enid but it wasn’t a temptation that he gave into. He didn’t understand why Jason seemed so annoyed by what happened.

“She’s Ron’s girlfriend though.” Carl defended the girl. “We’re just friends and I didn’t kiss her.”

Jason nodded. “I know you didn’t but she never did anything to stop you. To me, it looked like she was waiting for you to kiss her.”

“How do you know that?” Carl asked, shocked. “You don’t even know her.”

“Neither do you, really.” Jason remarked before taking a breath. “Look, I don’t mind you being friends with her.”

“So, what’s your problem then?” Carl repeated, visibly annoyed.

“My problem is that I think she was trying to make you do something you’d regret.” Jason told him truthfully. “I don’t trust her and I don’t like her. I just want you to be careful around her.”

“She thinks you hate her.” Carl told him. “And I can take care of myself.”

Jason sighed. “I don’t hate her yet but if she hurts you or uses you, she’ll have a reason to be scared of me.”

“She’s not going to hurt me or use me!” Carl snapped.

Jason studied Carl’s expression. He looked angry and hurt, all Jason had managed to do was upset him. This was what Jason hated. If he lied, Carl got angry. If he told the truth, Carl still got angry. He knew that Enid was up to something and Carl refused to see it. Jason knew he couldn’t win the argument and would just have to keep an eye on Carl. If Enid did anything to hurt him, Jason would kill her.

Jason quickly cupped Carl’s face in his hands and crashed their lips together forcefully. Carl initially tried to push him off because of his anger but he soon melted into the kiss when Jason held him there. Jason continued to kiss the younger teen passionately until Carl was lying on his back and Jason was on top of him.

Eventually, Jason broke the kiss and stared down at Carl. “No more fighting, I don’t like it.”

“Then trust me more and don’t start fights.” Carl retorted, licking his lips slowly.

Jason nodded. “Sorry. I’m going through a lot and I don’t want to ever lose you. I guess I’m a little protective.”

Carl laughed lightly alongside Jason. “Just a little? Try a lot.”

Jason smiled down at him and kissed his nose. “I know, sorry.”

“Stop saying sorry and come here.” Carl replied and wrapped his arms around Jason’s neck.

Jason took the cue and let Carl pull him back down into another passionate kiss. Their tongues battled one another as Carl’s hands rubbed down Jason’s back. They both moaned into the kiss when Jason lowered his hips to grind against Carl, feeling the growing hardness beneath the fabric of his boxers. It was going to be a while yet before they fell asleep.

 

_Jason zipped up his B-3 bomber jacket as he walked round the motorhome. Goosebumps shot up his legs as his slim blue jeans did nothing to protect him from the cold wind. The air itself was warm when the wind wasn’t trying to freeze them. He shoved his hands into his jacket pockets and walked over to the edge of the hill, observing the dark forest that extended below them._

_Behind him on top of the motorhome was Tyler who sat on watch. He was a large man with a muscular build with a brilliant sense of humour. He sat on the roof with an SVD Dragunov sniper rifle with cherry wood furniture. His fingers tapped away against the barrel of the rifle as he sang a song to himself under his breath._

_Jason stared up at the clear night sky, losing himself in thoughts about the stars. There were so many of them and they were all millions of times larger than he was and were located millions of miles away. It reminded him how insignificant everything on Earth was yet at the same time highlighted just how important it all was. It was easy to get confused._

_“Can’t sleep?” A rough voice asked from his left._

_Jason turned to the owner of the voice, Henry. Henry was in his fifties, he was tall with broad shoulders and had the strength of an ox. He wore dark brown cargos with deep pockets, black timberland boots, brown leather fingerless gloves and a black trench coat. His hair was short with a receding hairline. His hair was still mostly dark but the black was giving way to grey. The same was true for his goatee, which was almost completely grey._

_“No.” Jason shook his head. “Unlike you, Henry, the man who doesn’t sleep.”_

_Henry chuckled. “Should have seen me in my prime when I was with the secret service. Sleep didn’t exist.”_

_“I can imagine.” Jason replied with a grin before looking back up at the stars._

_“You are safe here, J.” Henry commented, stopping beside him. “We know what we’re doing. Two lookouts and four people on perimeter duty.”_

_“I could be behind a one hundred foot high wall and still have trouble sleeping.” Jason responded with a shrug. He no longer felt safe if he was asleep._

_“Try not to worry.” Henry tried to reassure him. “The government will get this virus under control.”_

_Jason shook his head. “I don’t think they ever will.”_

_“Now, now, J. Don’t be a pessimist.” Henry remarked with a disappointed tone._

_“I’m not being pessimistic.” Jason countered, turning to him. “The military were shooting living people and exterminating entire communities. Doesn’t seem like they have much of a handle on things at all.”_

_“This thing was first identified seven months ago, J. Seven months ago.” Henry argued his point calmly. “You think they didn’t learn anything about Wildfire in those six months before we saw it?”_

_Jason shrugged. “Sure as hell didn’t find out how to stop it.”_

_“So you think they failed?” Henry questioned. “That this is it from now on?”_

_Jason’s face was grim as he answered. “Yeah. I think this is the start of the human extinction event.”_

_“Is that why you can’t sleep?” Henry asked, placing a hand on Jason’s shoulder. “Because you think it’s all hopeless?”_

_Jason shook his head. “Not really. It’s more the virus itself and how strange it is, it’s fucking freaky.”_

_“It lived up to its name, it spread like wildfire.” Henry remarked, reflecting on what little Intel he had been given before official communication went down._

_“Just think though. It kills you and then brings you back. It reanimates corpses, turning them into the walking dead.” Jason explained. “And the only way to stop them is by destroying the head. It’s like something out of a Halloween comic book.”_

_“Nature couldn’t have spawned something this hellish.” Henry commented with a sigh. “I don’t know, but my guess is that this was some experiment gone wrong.”_

_“I’m inclined to agree.” Jason nodded._

_Kellin emerged from behind the motorhome in his black skinny jeans and blue hoody. He smiled when his eyes met Jason’s before walking up to his boyfriend and embracing him in a tight hug. The two teens remained like that as they stood with Henry who smiled at their display of affection._

_“Those things out there.” Jason commented, continuing the discussion. “They freak me out.”_

_“Maybe so but at least they are slow and stupid.” Henry replied. “If things don’t get any better, it’s people you’re going to need to be wary of.”_

_“People?” Jason questioned, surprised. He would have thought people would stick together._

_“I’ve seen it in warzones. When society ends, the worst in people comes out.” Henry explained. “Once supplies, vehicles and safe homes become limited, people will start fighting each other to survive.”_

_“So what do we do?” Kellin asked innocently, speaking for the first time that night._

_“We fight back. We kill if we have to.” Henry answered. “We won’t have much of a choice so we should get ourselves ready for it.”_

_Kellin cuddled into Jason some more, disturbed by the idea of killing people. Kellin could barely kill the undead let alone murder another living being. He had been a vegetarian most of his life as well, so killing anything was abhorrent to him._

_Jason kissed Kellin’s forehead and stroked the back of his head. “I’ll keep you safe, I promise.”_

Jason woke slowly, his eyes fluttering open as the heat of the morning sun struck his face. The first thing he saw was Carl’s sleeping form and his relaxed face. Jason smiled and gently stroked some loose hair out of Carl’s face as he admired the younger teen. He didn’t know what he had done to deserve Carl but he wasn’t going to question it too much. No one was going to take Carl from him, he’d make sure of it.

Since it was early, Jason decided to let Carl sleep so he rolled over to his side of the bed and pulled his diary out of the bedside drawer. He yawned as he opened up the page and marked down the two tally marks as was his morning ritual. He pushed some hair out of his own eyes before standing up and pulling on his running clothes. It was a good morning for a run and Alexandria was still mostly asleep as he could only hear the first morning chirps of nearby birds.

The sun was warm on his skin as Jason ran around the perimeter of Alexandria. Passing through the air was a cool breeze which blew his hair in different directions as it bounced from all the running. His morning runs were a ritual he had kept from before the apocalypse and was a great way for him to organise his thoughts. As Jason lived in Alexandria, it was also a good way to inspect the walls for any breaches or weak spots. So far he had never found any, much to his delight.

Jason grimaced as his thoughts wandered to Enid. He knew the girl was up to something with Carl but he couldn’t work out what it was. If she had been single he would have taken it as flirting and an effort to get with Carl. As she was Ron’s girlfriend, however, this led Jason to question what her real motivations were. Was she trying to hurt him by damaging his relationship with Carl or did she want to cheat on Ron for some bizarre reason. Jason didn’t know and found it impossible within himself to really fathom her motivations.

Unfortunately, Carl appeared to be under her spell. He was willing to defend her and Jason didn’t like how jumpy and easily angered Carl got when on the subject. Jason refused to let Enid take his boyfriend from him. He would do whatever it took to make sure she didn’t hurt or use Carl in any way, even if it meant killing her. Jason would never admit it, but there was a side of him that would enjoy killing her. He knew that should scare him but he couldn’t feel any fear at all.

Jason looked around as he ran. He knew the community had to change because it was far too vulnerable. Rick had told them as much the night before but it didn’t look like they had listened to a single word he had said. Jason knew this made the secret coup all the more likely. He didn’t want it to come to that because it would mean a lot of blood would be spilled and that could put the group at risk. He really hoped the residents could change instead of having their home taken over by outsiders.

As much as he didn’t want to do it, Jason decided he would see Deanna later on that day and speak with her. She hated his guts, he knew that much but she was the woman in charge. If he could manage to plead his case in a different way, then perhaps he’d convince her to not only let Rick stay but also let him have a much bigger say in what happened. What was the point of bringing the group in to help if she didn’t want to accept any of it? Jason knew it would be a difficult, tiring discussion but he would do it for Carl and Judith. They needed a safe place to live. He would make sure they had one.

Jason ran back to the house, already seeing many of the residents waking up and going about their days. He remembered he also had to speak to Trisha at some point about reporting him but that wasn’t a priority. Once Carl woke up there would be only one place he’d want to go, which would be to see his father. Jason entered the house and moved as quietly as he could so he didn’t wake anyone on his way up the stairs.

When he returned to the bedroom he found Carl still fast asleep. While he had been out on his run Carl had managed to cocoon himself inside the covers. Jason couldn’t help but smile, it was an adorable sight to see this Carl sized cocoon of bed sheets with Carl’s messy mop of hair sticking out the top. Jason pulled off his running gear that was sticking to him due to sweat and headed straight for their ensuite bathroom. He needed to shave.

 

Over an hour later and Jason and Carl were sat in Alexandria’s holding cell. In the centre of the room, Rick lay unconscious on a large mattress, his head supported by a pillow. In the corner of the room, Michonne sat on a chair and kept watch. Jason and Carl sat on the floor with their legs crossed, holdings hands while they watched Rick sleep. He hadn’t woken up since Michonne hit him over the head and Carl was starting to get worried.

Jason, sensing his concern, squeezed Carl’s hand lightly to remind him that he wasn’t alone. Jason knew that Rick was a very strong, tough and resilient individual, he was a survivor and he could come back from a little bump on the head. He figured Rick was spending so much time unconscious because of fatigue instead of the injury itself. Jason had a lot of respect for Rick and to some extend saw him as a father figure. He smirked to himself in amusement, if he and Carl continued the way they were going Rick would literally become his father in law.

Jason trusted Rick tremendously. Even though he had went too far the night before and lost his composure, Jason assumed it was all because of his frustration. He felt the same way. Rick had always been there to help them, to guide them and he had incredible amounts of faith in Jason. This was demonstrated by how much he trusted him with Carl and appreciated his existence in the group. Jason had no idea that the man who he woke up to pointing a gun to his head would become so important to him.

_Jason felt himself slowly fade back into consciousness. Discomfort in his neck struck him quickly, reminding him that he was in the front room and had fell asleep with Carl. He moved his arms, searching for the boy but couldn’t seem to find him. Perhaps he had woken before him. That would be normal and nothing to worry about. What wasn’t normal was the cold, circular sensation on his forehead. He furrowed his brow to try and remove the strange sensation but it didn’t go away. When he opened his eyes his breath got caught in his chest. A sudden sense of fear shot through him._

_Rick was awake. Rick was standing over him. Rick did not look pleased to see him. The cold sensation on his forehead revealed itself to be the barrel of Rick’s Colt Python revolver. His eyes met Rick’s glare and only moved to locate Carl, who was standing beside the couch behind Rick. He looked worried._

_“Who are you?” Rick asked him gruffly._

_Jason raised his hands in defence and submission. “My name’s Jason.”_

_“Carl may have let you in here.” Rick told him, his voice still gruff. “But he doesn’t make the decisions. I do.”_

_“Well, in his defence you were in no position to make any decisions.” Jason replied, trying to keep his tone calm and non-threatening._

_Rick pulled back the hammer on his revolver, making sure the weapon was ready to fire. This sent a cold panic up Jason’s spine._

_“He’s fourteen. He can’t read people, can’t be sure if they’re lying.” Rick told him with an icy tone. “I was a police officer before all this. I_ _can_ _read people. If you try anything. Anything. I will kill you.”_

Jason found it crazy to think that Rick had gone from threatening to kill him to killing anyone who threatens him. Being part of Rick’s family certainly had its advantages and Jason was grateful to be a part of it.

_As Carl stuffed the can back into his bag something caught Rick’s attention. Pinned to the side of an abandoned train cart was a large sign. They all walked over for a closer look as a map was pinned just below the sign. They all read it. Rick and Michonne shared glances._

_“What do you think?” Michonne asked him._

_“Let’s go.” Rick stated, taking the bandage off his hand and tossing it to the ground. “Let’s go.”_

_Jason stood next to the sign and read it one last time._

_TERMINUS. SANCTUARY FOR ALL. COMMUNITY FOR ALL. THOSE WHO ARRIVE SURVIVE._

_“Hey Rick?” Jason called out, causing the trio to stop walking. Rick stared back at him._

_“What’s the verdict?” Jason asked, his arms splayed out and hands open by his sides. “Do you trust me now? Am I allowed to come with you?”_

_Carl looked up at his father’s face. He didn’t think this was still an issue but it obviously was. They were out of the house. They were on the road. Rick had almost fully recovered. Jason wasn’t needed anymore. His heart rate increased. He wanted Jason to stay with them and was mentally preparing an argument should his father say no._

_Rick smiled at the young man and nodded._

_“You’re one of us.”_

The biggest challenge for Jason had been confessing his relationship with Carl to Rick. At one point Rick had warned him that if he ever touched Carl then Rick would kill him. However, when he worked up the courage to tell the man and answer all the questions that he had, he discovered that Rick was very open and accepting of the relationship.

_“Hey, Rick? Is it okay if I take Carl to the lake for a while?” Jason asked the leader. “Figured he could use a change of scenery.”_

_Rick thought for a moment before nodding. “Take Michonne with you just in case.”_

_Jason nodded and made his way for the door. He couldn’t tell if Rick had said that out of genuine concern for walkers or to avoid anything intimate taking place between himself and Carl._

_“Jason.” Rick called after him, halting the young man in his tracks._

_“Yeah?” Jason asked, turning round to face him._

_“I appreciate the effort you made to speak to me about you and Carl.” Rick told him. “I respect your honesty.”_

_“You’re his father. It would be wrong of me to keep it hidden from you.” Jason replied._

_Rick nodded. “I want you to know that I knew. I figured it out pretty quickly.”_

_Jason’s eyes widened in shock as he was momentarily stunned into silence. Rick had known but hadn’t said anything for what could have been days._

_“Why didn’t you say something?” Jason asked, confusion and surprised._

_“Because that was your responsibility.” Rick explained._

_Jason understood. Rick had remained silent as a test of character to see if Jason could be trusted and if he was fit to be with his son. By mustering up the courage to take Rick away from the others to inform him of their relationship he had secured Rick’s approval with his level of honesty and maturity. Jason also noted that Rick was far more perceptive than he had originally given him credit for and knew it would be wise to keep that in mind for future reference._

Jason had learned from that point on that it was never a good idea to hide anything from Rick. He swore from that moment to be open with the man to avoid problems as he knew Rick was far too perceptive for lies to be very effective. His dedication to Carl had earned him Rick’s love and respect, though he rarely spoke of it there were the few moments when he made Jason aware of how much he was appreciated.

_Rick turned his head to keep an eye on his sleeping children. His eyes met with Jason’s as Carl remained against him, sleeping soundly. Jason smiled softly at Rick._

_“Thank you.” Rick said lowly._

_“For what?” Jason questioned._

_“You never let them out of your sight.” Rick explained._

_“I made you a promise, Rick.” Jason replied with a smile as he leaned his head back. “Besides, I love him. You know that. You all do.”_

_Rick nodded slowly while the others remained silent. “I know.”_

Jason vowed that he would protect Carl with his life. It was one promise he was never going to break and if it meant taking over Alexandria by force then that was something he was prepared to do. He’d kill however many people he had to so Carl could be safe and happy. It was the ultimate promise he had chosen to make to Carl’s father and he would always honour it.

“You two should head home.” Michonne finally spoke up, interrupting their thoughts. “There’s no reason to waste the day away sitting in here waiting for him to wake up.”

“I want to be here when he wakes up.” Carl told her.

“Carl, the first place your dad’s gonna go when he wakes up is back home.” Michonne told him with a gentle smile. “You can come back later if he hasn’t woken in a couple hours.”

Carl sighed in defeat. He knew he wouldn’t win an argument against Michonne and she was speaking sense. He nodded slowly and stood up to his full height, followed by Jason. Jason and Michonne shared a knowing, trusting look before the two boys left the house.

As they walked down the street holding hands they noticed a lot of looks were being sent their way. Carl kept his head down, doing his best to ignore the judgemental stares. Jason, however, glared back at each and every one of them until they broke eye contact. They didn’t know if they were staring because of their relationship or because of what happened with Rick but they didn’t really care.

As they approached the intersection of the various streets, Jason held back. He remembered asking Aaron about supplies to which the man agreed and was happy to provide them. Unfortunately, Aaron had left on the recruiting mission with Daryl so he couldn’t ask him. Jason hoped that Eric was home and was aware of the agreement otherwise he was in for a very awkward conversation.

“Hey, why don’t you go on ahead and I’ll meet you back at the house?” Jason suggested, stopping in his tracks. “I need to see Eric for something then I’ll be right there, okay poppet?”

Carl gave him a suspicious stare before agreeing with a nod of his head. “Okay, don’t be too long.”

“I’ll try not to be.” Jason answered and kissed Carl’s hand before letting go.

Carl headed down the street towards their house while Jason took a breath before walking up the steps to the front door of Aaron and Eric’s house. Jason knocked on the door three times and then stuffed his hands into his jacket pockets. He took a deep breath and waited for Eric to come to the door and answer. The tell-tale shuffle-click of crutches told him Eric was approaching the door.

Eric finally opened the door. “Hi, Jason, right?”

Jason nodded. “Yeah, that’s me.”

“Last time your hair was longer and you badly needed a shave.” Eric told him with a smile. “I didn’t recognise you for a moment.”

“Neither did I when I looked in the mirror.” Jason joked. “Before and after.”

Eric hopped aside and stretched out his arm, gesturing inside. “Please, come in.”

Jason nodded and stepped inside, closing the door for the other man so he could use his crutches.

“So, how can I help you?” Eric asked as he made his way into the living room.

Jason followed him, a little nervous. “I asked Aaron a while back about certain supplies.”

“What supplies would those be?” Eric asked him, sitting down on the couch with his leg raised up.

“I thought he told you.” Jason commented in surprise.

“He said you asked for supplies but you never told him what they were.” Eric explained with a shrug.

“Oh…right.” Jason responded, growing more nervous as his answer would be awkward.

“So, what were they?” Eric pushed him with a cheeky smile.

“A couple of condoms and some lube…please.” Jason answered, his voice almost a whisper from how awkward he felt.

Eric seemed to find this hilarious as he burst into laughter. “Don’t worry, Jason. I knew all along. I just wanted to see your reaction.”

Jason let out a sigh of relief that was followed by a light chuckle. “Well, thank fuck for that.”

Eric reached over to the other end of the sofa and opened up a small set of drawers. He rummaged around in one of the drawers before producing two small plastic packets and a small plastic tub with a blue lid.

“First time, then?” Eric questioned as he handed Jason the items.

“Carl’s first time.” Jason answered as he pocketed the items. “I’m not new to the whole process.”

Eric giggled at Jason’s prude language. “Well, I’m sure he’s in good hands then.”

Jason smiled before turning serious. “Yeah, he is. Look, I’m really sorry about asking for these. I haven’t had time to find any on my own and…”

“Don’t worry about it.” Eric interrupted him. “The way I see it, it’s payback for saving my life that night.”

Jason fell silent and nodded. He could accept those terms.

 “How did you two meet? If you don’t mind me asking.” Eric asked, curiosity gripping him.

Jason smiled in reflection. “Carl was getting attacked by a walker and I just happened to be passing by.”

“Knight in shining armour, I see.” Eric joked.

“Something like that.” Jason remarked. “What about you and Aaron?”

“We both joined the same NGO and worked together.” Eric explained with a fond smile. “We were pretty much inseparable from day one.”

“Sounds like me with my ex.” Jason opened up, somewhat uncharacteristically. “He and I met at a club and it all snowballed pretty quickly from there.”

“Love is like that, I find.” Eric commented with a grin.

“That it is.” Jason replied and offered out his hand for Eric to shake. “Thanks again for this. Hope you get back on your feet soon.”

Eric shook Jason’s hand. “You’re very welcome. I hope you give Carl a night he won’t forget.”

Jason blushed slightly. “Oh I will.”

 

Rick awoke suddenly. His eyes squinted to being exposed to daylight so suddenly as he tried to get his bearings. He had been changed out of his uniform and into a white t-shirt with small white plasters placed over the cuts on his face. He was lying on a mattress in a dark room he didn’t recognise.

Rick rubbed his forehead and eyes as he tried to remember how he got there. He had received permission from Jessie to deal with Pete, he then had a fight with Pete which he won before arguing with Deanna while holding her at gunpoint. After that he couldn’t remember anything so he assumed someone had knocked him out and locked him up in this dark room.

He glanced at his right hand which also had bandages on it after being damaged in the fight. He slowly sat up and checked the room again. It was dark and small. It reminded him of the train car in Terminus except this time he had a bed to lie on for the duration of his captivity. It was clear to him the Alexandrians were not on his side yet. Rick snorted in incredulous amusement as he went to lie back down.

“What’s so funny?” Michonne’s voice sounded from a dark corner of the room.

Rick opened his eyes and lifted his head to find her watching over him, arms folded and expression stern.

“You were here the whole time?” Rick questioned. He was surprised he didn’t spot her.

“All night.” Michonne answered. “What’s so funny?”

“It’s…it’s like the train car.” Rick explained with a sigh. “After the whole thing…I’m still there.”

“Deanna wanted you in here, calm things down. Rosita patched you up.” Michonne explained. “Carl and Jason came by for a while, I sent them home.”

Michonne got up and pulled the chair she had been sitting on closer to Rick’s bed before sitting back down on it.

“Rick, what are you doing?” She questioned sternly.

Rick didn’t answer, he shook his head and rubbed the back of his neck as he was unsure of what to say. Michonne sighed at his lack of response.

“We put Pete in another house.” Michonne continued. “You could have told me what was happening.”

“It moved fast…and then Noah…” Rick responded. “I couldn’t tell you about the gun.”

“No, you couldn’t.” Michonne hissed back. She felt betrayed by his lack of trust in her.

“You wanted this place.” Rick attempted to justify his dishonesty.

“We had to stop being out there.” Michonne retorted. She was still on his side no matter what.

Rick looked around. “Well, we’re here.”

“Well, you just said you weren’t.” Michonne countered, causing them both to glare at one another. She had a point.

Just then the door of the room opened to reveal Glenn who stepped into the room followed by Carol and Abraham. Glenn and Carol came into the room while Abraham remained inside the doorway.

“Where’d you get the gun?” Michonne asked him.

“You took it, right? From the armoury?” Carol interjected. “That was stupid. How’d you do it?”

Rick stared back at her, amazed at how easily she could lie and hide any of her own involvement.

He shrugged, unsure of how to lie about acquiring the gun. “Just in case.”

“Deanna’s planned to have a meeting tonight for anyone who wants to.” Glenn told them.

“To kick Rick out?” Abraham pondered aloud.

“To try.” Carol commented cynically.

“We don’t know that.” Glenn argued. “Maggie’s with Deanna right now, she’ll find out what it is.”

 “At the meeting, you say you were worried about someone being abused and no one was doing anything about it. You say you took a gun just to be sure that Jessie was safe from a man who wound up attacking you.” Carol instructed. “Say you’ll do whatever they want you to, just tell them a story that they wanna hear. It’s what I’ve been doing since I got here.”

“Why?” Michonne asked, surprised by Carol being so dishonest with the community.

“Because these people are children and children like stories.” Carol retorted coldly.

“What happens after all the nice words and they still try to kick him out?” Abraham asked them, planning for the worst case scenario.

“They’re guarding the armoury now.” Glenn commented.

“We still have knives.” Carol mentioned, remembering that she still had two guns and Jason had another. “That’s all we’ll need against them.”

“Tonight at the meeting if it looks like it’s going bad, I whistle. Carol grabs Deanna, I grab Spencer and you grab Reg.” Rick explained, pointing to Michonne. “Glenn and Abraham cover us and watch the crowd.”

“We can talk to them.” Michonne argued, concerned over the potential consequences of this plan.

“We will. If we can’t get through we’ll take the three of them and say we’ll slit their throats.” Rick continued.

“Like at Terminus?” Glenn commented in disgust.

“No. We just tell them.” Rick explained, revealing it to be a bluff as that’s all that would be necessary. “They give us the armoury and it’s over.”

Glenn’s expression was grim. Everything was falling apart around them. “Did you want this?”

“No. I hit my limit. I screwed up.” Rick answered honestly. “And here we are. Now if you’ll excuse me I’m just gonna sleep some more.”

Rick didn’t wait for their permission and lay back down on his side like he had been when he first woke up. Glenn and the others decided to let him sleep and left him alone, closing the door behind them. 

 

Maggie glared through the window as she watched Gabriel take his jacket down off the washing line. As far as she was concerned he was a treacherous little toad. After their group had saved him and went out there way to keep him safe, bringing him to a paradise in the apocalypse, he had back stabbed them. His warning to Deanna was undeserved and intentionally deceitful. Maggie had originally hoped Gabriel’s religious rants wouldn’t have been taken seriously by Deanna but Rick’s outburst the previous night gave them some validation.

“Maggie?” Reg called, getting her attention. “Hey, she’s out on the porch.”

Maggie smiled to the old man and followed him out onto Deanna’s garden porch. The community leader stood with a pad of paper where she was writing down notes.

“We need to talk about Pete.” Deanna told her.

“The meeting tonight.” Maggie confirmed.

“Maggie, if we can talk about…” Reg began but was interrupted by his wife.

“I wanna talk to everyone about what happened and what we need to do about it.” Deanna explained.

“If it includes sending Rick away, it’s not gonna work.” Maggie told her.

“Tell me what that means.” Deanna challenged the younger woman.

“You let Rick in, you let all of us in. You talked to us. You decided it.” Maggie answered. “And now you want to put that decision on a group of frightened people who might not have the whole story. That’s not leadership.”

“Tonight is just a forum, it’s just for people to say their piece.” Reg explained.

“And I’ll make the decision as I have done since the beginning.” Deanna finished.

“He was frustrated. The things he’s seen, the things he’s lost.” Maggie argued. “The things we’ve all lost.”

“The things you’ve lost?” Deanna questioned, still angry over her son’s death.

“We’ve lost so much more.” Maggie countered with a calm shake of the head.

“He took a gun and he pointed it at people.” Deanna argued angrily.

“He didn’t pull the trigger.” Maggie retorted, knowing how cold Rick could be.

“That’s a metric?” Deanna questioned, somewhat incredulous. “That he didn’t pull the trigger?”

Maggie nodded. “Yes.”

Reg stepped between them. “Michonne stopped him, Deanna. Michonne did.”

Deanna shook her head, still upset and confused. “I’m gonna do what I have to do, Maggie.”

Maggie stared at the older woman for a moment. Pete had been a problem that Deanna knew about but chose not to do anything to stop it. She was now angry that Rick had took action and had pointed out the cold, hard fact that they weren’t ready for what life was truly like. It sounded like Rick was going to be sent away for keeping the place safe, the very job he had been brought in to do. She stormed off down the steps.

“Maggie!” Reg called as he followed her down the steps into the courtyard. “Maggie!”

Maggie stopped and turned around to face the old man who stopped on the bottom steps.

“The cavemen, they were all nomads and they all died. Then we evolved into this and we lived.” Reg told her. “Civilization starts when we stop running and we live together, when we stop sending people away from the world and from each other. That’s what I’m going to tell her, that’s what I’m going to tell everyone.”

Maggie smiled. Reg was such a genuine and nice man who could obviously see the truth of things. He appeared to have read the situation with Rick better than his wife had. This gave Maggie hope. She nodded to him before leaving, her anger gone for the time being.

As Jason left Eric’s house and made his way down the steps and onto the street he spotted Maggie storming out of Deanna’s courtyard. It reminded him that he needed to try and talk some sense into the woman, even though he really didn’t want to. His mind was more occupied with how he planned to make love to Carl that night instead of fighting with the small statured leader of Alexandria again.

Jason walked across the street and into her courtyard. Reg alerted his wife to Jason’s presence as the teen made his way up the steps and onto their porch. He leaned against the support beam and folded his arms, the leather sleeves of his jacket squeaking quietly from the movement.

“I don’t want to speak to you right now.” Deanna told him sternly with a dismissive wave.

“Surprisingly, I didn’t wake up this morning for the sole purpose of talking to you either.” Jason retorted. “But there are things that need to be said.”

“Perhaps you could save them for the meeting here tonight?” Reg suggested, trying to diffuse what he knew was a brewing argument.

Jason glanced at him and shook his head once. “I’ve got plans for tonight. What I have to say won’t take long.”

Deanna sighed loudly and put down her notepad. “Fine. Let’s hear it.”

“Are you seriously considering kicking Rick out? Kicking all of us out?” Jason questioned, his expression stern. “Us being here will be the only reason this place stays standing.”

“This community has been thriving long before you got here.” Deanna reminded him. “Since your group arrived you killed Kevin and Tony, Rick tried to kill Pete last night and our son died.”

“Rick could have killed Pete last night if he really wanted to.” Jason countered. “And Aiden died because of his own recklessness, much like the rest of you will if you don’t start listening to us.”

Deanna took a step forward, her glare was intense. “How _dare_ you. How dare you use my son’s death against me. Have you any idea how much pain I’m dealing with? Have you no respect?”

Jason also stepped forward and challenged her with his own glare. “I’m not using your son to hurt you. I’m using the truth to get you to open your eyes. So cut the crap, Deanna. I’ve lost everyone who was ever dear to me outside of this group. Everyone. Don’t try to compare war wounds with me.”

“How does disrespecting our son in death help you in any way?” Deanna questioned angrily, she was visibly shaking.

“Because he didn’t know what he was doing and that got him killed.” Jason told her bluntly. “Nicholas doesn’t know what he’s doing either and that got Noah killed.”

“You don’t know that.” Deanna retorted. “Neither of us were there when it happened.”

“Oh please. You know Nicholas lied about what happened. That’s why you’re not jumping to his defence.” Jason commented with a knowing smirk. “Makes me wish I killed him before. If I had, Noah would still be alive.”

“I already told Rick. We don’t kill people here.” Deanna scolded him.

“No, that’s right.” Jason responded flippantly. “You just get people killed, don’t you?”

“Look, Jason. You can’t expect to have it all your way. There has to be compromise.” Reginald interrupted quickly. “Compromise is how we live together and ultimately survive together.”

Jason glared at him, barely turning his head to look at the old man. “The people out there don’t ever compromise. You’re a couple of fools if you think you can live in this world without getting blood on your hands.”

“This community is about peace and civilisation. Not murder and savagery.” Deanna threatened. “If you can’t agree to that then I’ll just send you away for good this time.”

“That’s what you think I am? What we are?” Jason asked incredulously. “We do whatever it takes to keep our loved ones alive. That’s what survival is about. You do what you need to do so you can stay alive.”

“You do what you have to and so will I.” Deanna stated firmly, desperate to end the argument with her authority.

Jason threw up his hands in frustration. “Fine! And when someone comes along to attack this place, you two can try to talk them out of it. Meanwhile, I’ll be busy killing the bastards to keep me and my family safe. Afterwards, we’ll see who actually survived, yeah?”

Deanna and Reg both glared at him, angered and hurt by his attitude. They weren’t so foolish as to talk to aggressors, but there had never been any to begin with so the possibility of them ever finding Alexandria wasn’t on their minds.

“Good luck living in your utopia.” Jason continued as he descended the steps into the courtyard. “Come see me when you’re ready to live in the real world where the rest of us are!”

Jason stormed out of the courtyard and back onto the street. He never looked back nor did he hear any retort. He was convinced the coup would have to go ahead because Deanna refused to listen. Either they would take Alexandria for themselves or some other group would attack and destroy the place. It was a ticking time bomb on a countdown to disaster, all because of their ignorance.

 

“Wake up.” Carol whispered as she nudged Rick awake.

Rick glanced up to check who it was. Once he realised it was Carol he slowly sat up until he had his back against the wall.

“It’s good what happened last night.” Carol commented. “We have more cover now, all of them think you’ve been found out. That it’s over.”

Carol pulled out the third gun, a Walther P22 and handed it to Rick who stared back at her. He was glad that she was still on his side and still on the same page. They both knew Pete had to be killed and they both knew they would need to take control of Alexandria one way or another.

“Why didn’t you wanna tell them we had more guns?” Rick asked her, referring to Glenn, Abraham and Michonne.

“Michonne stopped you, she knocked you out.” Carol responded, clearly not trusting the samurai as a result.

“I deserved it.” Rick answered with a shrug.

“It was stupid.” Carol commented.

“She’s with us.” Rick told her. “Glenn is.”

“I didn’t tell them about the guns just in case.” Carol finally answered.

Rick looked up at the ceiling and sighed. He hated lying to his own people, to his family about what was going on and what they were planning. It was the whole reason he had told Jason. He knew he could trust the young man and he was seen as Carl’s guardian. If anything happened, he needed to be prepared to protect Carl so Rick could focus on protecting everyone.

“I don’t wanna lie anymore.” Rick told the older woman.

“You said you don’t wanna take this place and you don’t wanna lie?” Carol commented with a sarcastic smirk. “Oh sunshine, you don’t get both.”

Rick tilted his head and sighed. Carol was right. He couldn’t say one thing and do another, he would need to find a way to lay all his cards out on the table. Those who stand with him will be safe, those who stand against him won’t be.

 

Jason sighed as he closed the front door behind him. He found Carl sitting on the sofa, having been sat waiting for him the entire time he was gone. He smiled as he watched Carl’s face light up upon his return. The older teen made his way over to the sofa and dropped himself down beside his younger lover with a sigh.

“That took longer than I thought it would.” Carl commented with a smirk.

Jason smirked back, catching his stare. “Yeah, sorry. I ended up talking to…well, more like shouting at Deanna.”

“What about?” Carl asked, instinctively closing the gap between them so their shoulders connected.

Jason sighed. “Well, I tried to tell her and Reg that if they don’t change they’re gonna die. That our group is what will keep this place standing and secure.”

“Were you nice about it?” Carl asked, already knowing the answer he was going to get. He knew how impatient Jason could get.

“Many words could be used to describe my approach.” Jason commented with an amused smirk. “Unfortunately, nice is certainly not one of them.”

“You should try being nice, so that they will listen.” Carl suggested, his fingers gently tracing Jason’s chest, a habit he had developed.

Jason leaned closer to Carl and kissed his head. “No point, I’m done talking to them. I’ve said my piece.”

“What about the meeting tonight?” Carl suggested, smiling at Jason’s affection.

“Oh, I’m not going to that.” Jason told him, trying to suppress his excited grin. “I have plans tonight.”

“What plans?” Carl questioned, all of it being news to him.

“Well, I’ll be spending the night with this really cute, super sweet boy I’ve met.” Jason told him, turning to face Carl. “And I was planning to do something really special with him.”

Carl blushed under Jason’s intensely amorous gaze. “What do you mean special?”

“You’ll have to wait and see.” Jason answered with a knowing smirk before kissing his boyfriend.

 

Rick squinted as the full blast of daylight hit his eyes. He had finally received permission to leave the room he had been locked up in. He ascended the steps up onto the street where Tobin and two other men stood with guns, presumably they had been guarding him in case he tried anything.

“Hey, Tobin.” Rick greeted as he walked past the three men.

“Rick.” Tobin answered his greeting, still cautious around the man.

He continued down the street, conscious of the fact that the three men were all staring at him as he walked away from them. Even though they had guns, they didn’t intimidate him in any way as they lacked the cold conviction to actually use them. That cold conviction was something Rick had and that gave him the advantage.

Rick turned his head to the left as he walked and stared up at Deanna, who stood on her porch. She glared down at him, unsure of what was going through the man’s mind despite his calm exterior. She was still deeply upset from her earlier argument with Jason and had made up her mind to deal with both him and Rick. The meeting that night would make sure the whole community knew the full story and would understand the decisions she was going to make. They weren’t going to stay.

 

Nicholas peered round from behind the corner of one of the houses as he watched Glenn sitting on the infirmary porch. He had just come out after checking in on Tara who was still unconscious. Nicholas hated the Asian man and knew that he was a threat. Glenn was strong, wasn’t easily intimidated and knew the truth about Nick. He had to be taken care of.

“You met with her?” Glenn asked Maggie as she walked up to him.

“Yeah.” Maggie answered, coming to a stop beside him.

“So what is it?” Glenn asked, referring to the purpose of the meeting.

“It’s what we thought.” Maggie delivered the bad news. “I’m gonna talk to people, talk to everyone I can right up till. I’m gonna try and solve this.”

 Glenn nodded but his expression was grim. Deanna still hadn’t done anything about Nick despite the fact the curly haired man had gotten Noah killed. Tara was still unconscious so there was no way of knowing if she would ever wake up. Jason had been exiled only to come back and blackmail Deanna, creating bad blood between them. Now Rick had caused chaos with his fight against Pete and his speech delivered at gunpoint.

“What?” Maggie asked, reading the expression on his face.

Glenn didn’t answer. He knew these problems were serious and had to be addressed. They all needed to stay in Alexandria, they had to make it work because they had almost been too far gone. Alexandria had rescued them from the brink of madness and death. Glenn couldn’t stand the thought of going back out into that world.

Maggie sat down next to him. “What?”

Glenn placed his hand on her thigh and rubbed it gently. “I love you.”

Maggie smiled back. “We’re gonna work it out. I know it.”

Glenn nodded. Maggie had pretty much read his thoughts. It was a testament to their love.

“I’ll see you there.” Maggie told him softly before getting up and walking away. She had to talk to as many residents as possible.

As Glenn watched her go, his eyes caught sight of some movement in the distance. As he focused on the far side wall, he spotted Nicholas climbing the wall. Neither he nor Glenn were allowed outside the walls but there he was defying Deanna’s orders. Glenn was suspicious about what the man was planning and chose to follow him.

 

Spencer opened the gate for Father Gabriel. The priest had come up to the gates requesting to be let outside and as there were no rules beyond common sense on leaving the community, he complied with the request.

“Are you sure you don’t want a gun, father?” Spencer asked him, concerned for his safety.

Gabriel shook his head as he stepped outside. “I just want a quick walk. The word of God is the only protection I need.”

Spencer watched the priest walk off as he closed the gate behind him. He respected people’s faith no matter what it was but he couldn’t help but feel Gabriel was being ridiculous. He had never seen the word of God protect anyone from walkers, he had only seen guns, knives and other weapons do that.

 

Carl giggled into the kiss as Jason pulled him on top of him. Jason grinned before kissing Carl again, his hands sliding down to the younger’s hips as Carl sat on his lap. They were still on the sofa but their passion had overtaken them for the time being. Jason gently bit down on Carl’s lower lip, drawing a moan of pleasurable surprise from the sheriff’s son. Jason released his lip so he could slide his tongue into Carl’s agape mouth, teasing the younger’s tongue as they pulled each other closer.

Carl’s arms were wrapped around Jason’s neck while Jason’s hands had found their way to Carl’s backside, squeezing the cheeks through his jeans. The younger teen whimpered into the kiss as he tried to grind himself against the older, they were both starting to grow hard in their jeans. They would need to take their passionate session upstairs to their room.

Jason’s hands found Carl’s hips again as he gently guided Carl off of his lap. Carl let out a groan of disappointment as he sat beside Jason again, their lips still locked. Jason’s hand came up to stroke some strands of Carl’s hair out of his face while his other hand rubbed the other boy’s chest through his shirt.

“Bedroom?” Jason asked, breaking the kiss momentarily.

Carl nodded fiercely, growing more and more excited.

They were suddenly interrupted by the front door opening. The two lovers turned round on the sofa to see the bandaged Rick entering the house. Carl jumped up from beside Jason and rushed over to his father.

“Dad!” Carl exclaimed as he rushed over.

“Hey.” Rick rasped, embracing his son in a hug.

“You okay?” Carl asked, concerned over his father’s injuries and mental state.

“Yeah.” Rick answered with a single nod. “Look, I’m sorry to both of you.”

Rick realised his actions had placed the security of their home in jeopardy. His rash actions may have become the catalyst to have them kicked out, or at the very least divided from the rest of the community. He didn’t want to lie anymore and he certainly wasn’t going to lie to his son and his boyfriend.

“It’s fine.” Jason responded as Rick started to walk away from them. “I screwed up first, remember?”

“We heard about the meeting.” Carl added, moving back over to stand beside Jason.

“You’re staying home.” Rick told his son before shifting his gaze to Jason. “Might be a good idea if you did too.”

“That’s what it is now, right?” Carl asked his father, making the man pause yet again. “Home?”

Rick turned back to his smirking son. “Yeah.”

“They need us.” Carl told his father, concerned for the naïve residents. “They’ll die without us.”

Rick walked back over to the two teenagers. “I might have to threaten one of them. I could have to kill one of them.”

“You won’t.” Carl countered, staring up at his father.

“I might.” Rick retorted bluntly. He was done being subtle with them.

“You have to tell them.” Carl argued the same case he had made to Jason.

“Well I told them last night.” Rick replied sternly. They clearly hadn’t listened to him.

“You need to tell them so they can hear you.” Carl continued, it was the same argument he had with Jason.

Rick shook his head grimly. “I don’t know if they can.”

Carl lowered his gaze and turned his head to Jason, looking for assistance from his lover.

“Does that make you afraid?” Rick asked his son, instantly reading the boy’s concern.

“Just…for them.” Carl answered with a frustrated sigh. “You have to tell them.”

Rick nodded slowly. He would be willing to try and talk to them one last time. He could make a last, desperate plea before simply taking the place over by force. They would thank him later.

“Rick, you’ve got to make them listen to you.” Jason added, finally speaking up.

“I don’t know how.” Rick rasped as he shook his head.

“Tell them everything we’ve been through, everything we’ve had to do.” Jason told him, feeling inspired and slightly light headed from the lingering pleasure. “You need to make them see what the world really is like now.”

“I tried but they don’t wanna hear it.” Rick countered, rubbing his eye.

“Don’t try to scare them. You’ve got to show them that you care.” Jason continued. “Make them see it as you wanting to help out of the goodness of your heart, instead of wanting to take control.”

Rick studied him silently, not answering immediately as he considered what Jason was saying.

“If you approach them in a warmer and more welcoming way, you might have better luck getting through to them.” Jason concluded. “And if that doesn’t work, then we can do it the old fashioned violent way.”

Rick nodded, Jason had a point. “I’m gonna try.”

“It’s all we can do these days.” Jason remarked as Rick made his way towards the stairs. “Try.”

“Yeah.” Rick answered before ascending the stairs towards the bathroom to get cleaned up.

 

Pete sat in the living room of the house he had been placed in. It was one of the empty houses. A dull throb of pain still shot through his face and body from the fight with Rick the night before. He was smouldering in the darkness of the room when he heard a couple loud knocks on the front door. At first he ignored the knocks, hoping that whoever it was would give up and leave him alone. They didn’t.

With a sigh of frustration, he stood up and headed over to the front door. He didn’t care who it was, he would tell them to leave him alone and slam the door in their face. Pete did not want visitors. He opened the door and was surprised when Carol came rushing in with a casserole in her hands.

“What the hell are you doing?” Pete asked angrily.

“You need to check on Tara.” Carol answered. “You treated her, you’re a surgeon, and you need to do that.”

Pete stepped over so that he was in front of her, towering over the much shorter woman. “Get out!”

Carol was surprisingly unintimidated and pulled out her knife. “I could kill you right now.”

Pete seemed to think it was a bluff, glancing at the knife before glaring at her again. The nice, community friendly cookie making woman was trying to threaten him? He wasn’t having that.

“I could. I will. And then who’s going to believe I did it because I didn’t like you?” Carol continued confidently, pressing the tip of the blade under his chin, scaring him. “No one. They’d believe you tried to hurt me, they’d definitely believe that.”

Carol whipped the knife away, making sure to nick his chin with the tip just for good measure. Pete gasped from the sudden pain and from fear. He had been wrong about this woman, she was as dangerous as the rest of her group. Pete glared at her, hatred in his eyes that attempted to mask the fear.

“Come at me.” Carol dared him. Pete didn’t move. “No? Yeah? _No_.”

Pete was trembling before her. He was sober enough to realise that it had been a trick. She wanted to kill him and goading him into attacking her would have been the best way. Carol looked disappointed.

“The way this has played out you have a chance. You’re here. Your wife’s there.” Carol explained to him. “You’re a small, weak nothing and with the world how it is, you’re even weaker.”

Pete was totally unaware that Carol had come from an abusive background. Her ex-husband, Ed, had been a nasty, abusive animal who hit her every night. Carol had evolved into a titan compared to her old, weak self thanks to the apocalypse. Pete didn’t scare her and presented her with the opportunity to stand up to her past demons.

“Play your cards right and maybe you don’t have to die.” Carol told him, thrusting the casserole into his hands. “I want my dish back clean when you’re done.”

Carol sheathed her knife and made her way to the door before letting herself out. Pete stood where he was until the door closed behind the older woman. He dropped the casserole dish to the floor and returned to the living room, knocking over the coffee table.

“This isn’t my house. This isn’t my house!” He shouted furiously to himself.

 

Nicholas ran through the dense woodland outside the walls of Alexandria. Glenn was close behind, trying to work out what the curly haired coward was up to. Deanna had explicitly prohibited both of them from leaving the community yet they were now both outside. Nicholas didn’t truly know how to handle himself outside the walls either but Glenn certainly did.

Glenn quickly lost sight of Nicholas but continued to walk in the same direction. He would pick up the man’s trail soon enough. After a few minutes he came across the corpse of Aiden’s walker trophy. It was a walker that had killed one of their friends so they had stupidly tied it up to a tree by its arms. Since the body was constantly decomposing, it had slipped loose and had almost bitten Tara before Glenn killed it.

Glenn looked at the disgusting body. That day, that whole situation had been what set off alarm bells in his mind. These people were inexperienced, naïve and over-confident. It was a dangerous concoction that would get them killed. In the case of Aiden, it already had got him killed.

A twig snapped nearby, alerting Glenn to a potential threat. He pulled out his knife, preparing to fight the walker that was no doubt approaching. He couldn’t hear any moans or rasps nor could he see any walker. Suddenly a gunshot sounded and pain shot through his shoulder as the bullet went through, causing him to tumble backwards down the hill.

Nicholas emerged from the dense foliage with his gun raised. He was using the very same Glock 19 that Rick had hidden in the blender. It was Nicholas who had stolen it the week before. Nicholas ran towards the top of the hill to finish Glenn off but discovered nothing more than blood splatters. The Asian man had disappeared into the vegetation causing Nicholas to panic. He had to kill Glenn before he made it back to Alexandria, he couldn’t risk the truth getting out.

 

Jessie was busy working on the living room window, trying to cover up the loose glass and make it safe before it could be repaired. Rick and Pete had well and truly smashed and broken it when they flew through it during their fight. She looked up to spot Rick walking up onto her porch.

Jessie sighed, checking to see if anyone was watching. “You should go.”

“I just wanted to check on you.” Rick told her. He tilted his head as he noticed she had a black eye. “Your eye.”

“He did it right when it was happening, it isn’t new.” Jessie explained.

The last thing Jessie needed was Rick hunting Pete down and killing him over her black eye. Rick had to be very careful if he was going to stay in the community and Jessie did want him to stay. Rick paused for a moment and reflected on the fight, trying to remember when Pete may have hit Jessie. After a few moments he remembered it happened out in the street.

_Rick tried to gouge out Pete’s eyes but the taller man managed to stop him from doing so. Both of them continued to grunt and growl with exertion as Pete managed to flip them over so he was above Rick, it was his turn to press Rick’s head into the ground. His hands reached for Rick’s throat in an attempt to strangle him just like the dark haired man had attempted on him moments before. Rick kept his own hands round Pete’s throat to stop him from strengthening his grip too much._

_Jessie rushed over and tried to pull Pete off of Rick. Pete was taller and had longer arms so he would inevitably win if Rick remained under him. Without hesitation Pete smacked her away with his left hand, striking her face and knocking her to the ground with a cry of pain. This served to infuriate Rick more. He kneed Pete in the groin before flipping them over again. Blood gushed from the wounds on their heads and faces as Rick managed to get into a position where he could strangle Pete again._

Jessie looked around again. “People shouldn’t see us talking right now.”

Rick nodded but he wanted to say his piece and be honest. “I’m not sorry I did it. No matter what happens. No matter what I have to do.”

Rick turned around and prepared to walk away. At least Jessie would know he didn’t have regrets no matter what happened at the meeting that night.

“Don’t turn around, Rick.” Jessie told him, making the man freeze in place. “You were right.”

Rick nodded before descending the stairs. He felt like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders just from Jessie’s approval. She had been blinded by fear and ignorance but his approach had been the right one in the end.

Unknown to both of them, Pete was watching them from his window across the street. He seethed with hatred at the mere thought of Rick making moves on his wife. His woman. He wouldn’t allow it. He’d rather die than let Rick take her from him.

 

Gabriel walked through the woodland whistling. He had made his decision. He couldn’t live with his guilt and shame over the death of his congregation. He was going to leave his fate up to God. He would expose himself to danger and see if God would forgive him or not. God had a plan and perhaps the walkers were a part of that plan. Perhaps Gabriel had failed the test beset to him by his Lord. He was going to find out.

Gabriel reached one of the deserted, dirt covered main roads. Across the road from him was a walker that was hunched over a body. It was clearly a survivor it had somehow managed to kill and was now feasting on hungrily. Gabriel walked out onto the road and whistled louder in an attempt to get its attention. It ignored him as it was too busy eating.

Gabriel stretched his arms out to his sides. “I’m ready!”

The walker turned around, blood pouring from its mouth and chin, dripping onto the cut noose that was still tied around its neck. Whoever the walker used to be had decided to commit suicide by hanging, completely oblivious to the fact that you turned no matter how you died.

“I’m ready.” Gabriel repeated nervously as the walker stood up and started shambling towards him.

The walker stumbled towards him, the rope from the noose dangling between its legs with each stiff, awkward step. Gabriel stood in place, his heart pounding from fear as he tried to remind himself that he was at God’s mercy now. Suddenly, the body that the walker had been feasting on moved. The man was still alive, albeit barely.

Gabriel felt his blood run cold. If he did let this monster attack him, it could be an extremely slow, excruciating death that he wasn’t sure he was ready for. If he was to die he wanted it to be quick and painless. He didn’t want to be tortured before becoming one more of the hungry freaks.

The walker was quickly upon him and his instincts kicked in by pushing the walker back. The hungry corpse advanced again, snarling loudly as it tried to bite him. Gabriel pushed the walker round and grabbed the back of the noose as he pushed against its back. He pulled the noose back as hard as he could, the walker snarling and growling loudly as its head rolled back. With a sudden snap, the noose pulled all the way back and decapitated the monstrosity.

The body collapsed to the floor lifeless with a loud thud. The head, however, remained active and still tried to bite whatever it could see. Gabriel whimpered in a mix of fear and disgust before his confidence returned to him. His instinct had been to defend himself so perhaps God wanted him to live. Perhaps God was allowing him to kill the walkers. Gabriel calmed himself and picked up a heavy rock which he slammed down into the decapitated head, crushing the skull with a single blow.

Gabriel took a breath and walked over to the twitching man on the road. Once he approached he saw the full extent of the man’s injuries. The man’s arms had been ripped open and the side of his torso had been feasted upon. He lay in a pool of his own blood with his entrails hanging out of his side on the road. Gabriel felt sick as he looked at the man’s face. The man’s face below his nose had been chewed off, exposing his skull, teeth and jaws. The walker had been working round the left side of his face, having ripped away his cheek and the bottom half of his ear. The dying man twitched some more, his heart failing him.

Gabriel whimpered and glanced at the rock in his hand. There was only one thing he could do for the man now. The priest recited a silent prayer in his head for the dying man before he slammed the rock into the man’s forehead and killed him. At least his suffering was over and he wouldn’t return as a walker. Gabriel left the rock embedded in the man’s crushed skull and collapsed first to his knees and then onto his side. He curled his knees up to his chest and covered his head with his arms and burst into tears.

 

Carl bounced Judith on his lap while Jason sat beside him, pulling funny faces at the little bundle of joy that was Carl’s baby sister. She giggled excitedly with each new silly face that Jason managed to pull, many of them even making Carl chuckle a bit. For the two teens, these moments with Judith were some of the best moments in their lives apart from their more private, intimate moments.

There was no violence, no walkers, they weren’t fighting for their lives nor were they struggling to find supplies or food. They were sitting together in their house, on their sofa, playing with Carl’s baby sister. Jason yet again reflected on the seriousness of his relationship with Carl and how Judith could become his baby sister in law. It was an odd yet wonderful thing to think about. He still felt marriage was a very big commitment and was somewhat obtuse in the apocalypse.

_Glenn and Jason were on opposite ends of the room. It was the fourth day and they had stopped off for a supply run in a small, abandoned town. It wasn’t near any other settlements so they had been right to assume that very few people had come through it scavenging supplies._

_“Do you think you’ll ever get married, you know, in the future?” Glenn asked Jason as he searched various drawers._

_Jason stepped over one of the walker’s corpses as he placed some cans in his bag._

_“I thought they didn’t approve of that before.” Jason commented, referring to the debate over gay marriage._

_“The old world is gone.” Glenn answered with a shrug. “So, would you?”_

_Jason thought for a moment as he searched another cupboard. “I don’t see the need really. I’m his and he’s mine. That’s enough for me.”_

_“You still gave him that necklace to match yours.” Glenn pointed out. “You wanted something to represent your relationship.”_

_Jason smiled and conceded with a nod. “Well, I’ll let Carl decide on the whole marriage thing.”_

_Glenn’s face turned serious, remembering how easily he nearly lost Maggie on several occasions._

_“Don’t leave it too long.” He warned. “We never know what’s going to happen.”_

Jason smiled as he remembered his discussion with Glenn on the fourth day of their journey to Virginia. It was probably a conversation that was worth having with Carl at some point. Then the fun part would be talking to Rick about it, though Jason had every confidence that the group leader would approve of it. If Rick still had any problems with Jason he wouldn’t have let the relationship get as serious as it already had.

Judith let out a big yawn before crying into Carl’s shoulder. It was her articulate way of telling her big brother that she was tired. After so much experience with her, Carl knew exactly what she meant so he stood up and carried her over to her cot. He gently placed her down on the small mattress and watched over her as she slowly fell asleep.

Jason stood beside Carl and looked down at the sleeping baby. He rubbed his boyfriend’s back slowly with one hand, never taking his eyes off of Judith. He knew how much Carl and everyone else had gone through for Judith to be alive with them at that moment. It was nothing short of a miracle even with the herculean efforts that had been required.

“Your mother was a beautiful woman.” Jason commented, his voice low.

“How do you know?” Carl asked, also keeping his voice low.

“Because I can see it in her.” Jason told him, whispering into his ear before kissing his earlobe gently.

Carol quietly made her way over to them after having returned to the house. She smiled softly as she checked on Judith who was fast asleep. The three of them all shared smiles over the baby. Their group truly was a family and Judith was arguably the most important member of that family.

“Why don’t you boys go for a walk before it gets dark?” Carol suggested. “You’ve been cooked up in this house almost all day.”

“What do you think?” Jason asked Carl softly. “Go for a walk?”

Carl nodded and grabbed his hat off the dining table. “Okay.”

 

Spencer pulled the gate open for Gabriel who had finally returned to the community as calmly as he had left. Once he had opened the gate halfway, Spencer turned to the priest.

“You’re back. Good. I was just about to sneak off to the meeting.” Spencer told him, walking away from the gate as Gabriel entered. “Do you think we could find some time to talk later about Aiden? There’s just some things I need to say and I’m not sure who I can say them too. I don’t really have anyone here right now, if you know what I mean.”

Gabriel stared at him sternly. He wasn’t in the mood for any of it. “I’ll see.”

“Cool.” Spencer replied and gestured to the gate before he turned back around. “Can you get that?”

“Yeah.” Gabriel answered lowly.

“Thank you.” Spencer responded and started walking back to his house for the meeting.

Gabriel never took his eyes off the man as he backed up and grabbed the gate with one hand. He pulled it back with enough force to get it moving before letting go of it. He started walking down the main street, his attention now on two figures he knew were Jason and Carl. He had some things he wanted to say to Jason. The gate slammed shut behind him before bouncing back open several inches. Gabriel never looked back to notice.

 

Nicholas dashed through the woodland with his gun in his hands. He had to find Glenn and kill him before he made it back to Alexandria where he could tell the others. A movement between the trees caught his attention so he charged towards it and aimed his gun. He froze. It wasn’t Glenn. It was a walker that was stumbling through the woods.

The walker turned as it spotted Nicholas and started stumbling towards him, rasping and snarling loudly. Nicholas lowered his gun and pulled out his knife. He could kill a single walker with just a knife like Glenn and the others. It was easy, surely. The walker snarled louder the closer it got, making Nicholas lose his nerve and sheath the knife. He raised his gun again and shot the walker in the head, dropping it dead.

Suddenly, a force pushed him from behind and slammed him up against the tree. It was Glenn. Glenn slammed his arm against the tree, causing the curly haired man to drop the gun as the wrestled with one another. Glenn slammed his fist into Nicholas’ side twice before hooking him in the jaw. Nicholas grabbed Glenn’s shoulder and thrust his thumb into the bullet hole, forcing Glenn to contort in pain as he cried out.

Nicholas managed to push the Asian man against another tree before punching him in the face twice with two strong hooks. When he went for a third Glenn lowered his head and grabbed Nicholas’ legs, tackling him to the ground. Glenn stomped down on Nicholas’ knee, the man crying out in agony before forcing Glenn onto his back. He quickly crawled over to Glenn and punched him in the ribs strongly, eliciting a shout of pain from the man beneath him.

Nicholas then thrust his thumb back into the bullet wound as hard as he could with Glenn wailing in response to the excruciating pain. The curly haired man lifted his hand away to punch Glenn in the face two more times while Glenn desperately tried to grab his neck. Glenn succeeded in getting his hands round Nicholas’ neck but the taller man responded by choking Glenn with one hand and pressing on his bullet wound with the other.

Glenn cried out in pain while Nicholas grunted out in exertion. A female walker rasped and snarled loudly as she approached the wrestling pair. Glenn tried to hold onto Nicholas so that he would get bitten by surprise but just as the walker pounced for him he moved and let it drop onto Glenn. Glenn held the walker away from his face with one hand while two more walkers came up behind the first and also descended on him. Nicholas ran off leaving the Asian man for dead. There was no hope of survival for him now.

 

Jason and Carl walked towards the intersection near the lake. They had already covered one full lap of Alexandria by the time they got back to the lake. Coming down one of the other streets was Gabriel, looking stern and dressed in a white jumper instead of his regular jacket. His focus was laser-like and concentrated on the two of them. Jason was reminded of a couple days before and sighed. It looked like he was in for a repeat of that argument.

“What’s wrong?” Carl inquired. “It’s just Gabriel.”

“You’re about to find out.” Jason muttered under his breath as he stopped walking.

Gabriel glared at both Jason and Carl as he approached them.

“Hey.” Carl greeted pleasantly, but only received a scolding glance in reply.

“You got a problem, Gabriel?” Jason questioned the priest. “Got something you want to share with the class?”

“You’re the problem. Both of you.” Gabriel hissed. “You stain this community with your filth and sodomy.”

Jason scoffed initially but in his peripheral vision he noticed Carl recoil slightly at the verbal attack. This angered him. No one was allowed to upset Carl while he was around.

“Getting bored now, Gabe.” Jason countered, trying to bring it to a close. “Be a good boy and fuck off, will you please, yeah?”

“Your sins are going to destroy this place! Just like the destroyed the people you knew!” Gabriel continued, undeterred by Jason’s response. “Your friends were killed, torn apart and consumed because of your sins. All because of you and what you are.”

Jason scowled at Gabriel, his anger rising as the man began to touch a few raw nerves. He took a couple deep breaths to try and control himself. Carl glanced up at Jason’s face, he could feel the anger radiating out of the older teen.

“And the worst one was your disgusting ex-boyfriend. He died the slowest because he sinned just as much as you. His end was long and agonising so he’d be prepared for the hellfire that awaited him!” Gabriel barked venomously, stepping closer each time. “All because of you! All because you were being punished for the demon you are, that’s why you were alone!”

Jason’s knuckles were white and his body shook as he fought the urge to attack the priest. His comments, for the first time ever, were cutting deep into Jason’s heart. He was reliving all his friends’ deaths in his head and he vividly remembered Kellin’s death. He remembered how much Kellin suffered and how agonising his final moments were for both of them.

“And now you’ve endangered the entire group and this entire community with your vile presence.” Gabriel continued. “God will take Carl away from you because you don’t deserve happiness. You deserve to watch everything you love rot and die!”

Jason glared daggers at Gabriel as he visibly shook. His heart was pounding a hundred beats a minute inside his chest, each beat echoing inside his head as he breathed rapidly through his nose. His knuckles were white with how tight he was clenching his fists. He wouldn’t let anyone upset or harm Carl. He wouldn’t let anyone take him away from him. Jason looked down at the ground and then back up. In front of him stood the Governor, who glanced at Gabriel who was frozen in place with a spiteful expression before looking back at Jason.

“Are you going to allow that?” The Governor asked him. “Are you going to let him or anyone else hurt the one you love?”

No, of course not!” Jason retorted angrily, his voice rumbling with rage.

“Then you know what you need to do.” The Governor instructed before fading away.

Jason tilted his head to the side as he snapped back to reality. He matched Gabriel’s spiteful glare with his own before lunging forward. He moved too fast for Gabriel to react and swung his fist straight into Gabriel’s face, knocking the man off balance. Jason followed it up with two more equally strong punches before kicking him to the ground.

Gabriel groaned in pain as he crashed onto the concrete of the street. Jason pounced on top of him, pinning him down with his legs and knees before he started rapidly punching Gabriel. The punches were directed to different places each time, his gut, his ribs, his face and his head. Jason was wild and uncoordinated. He wanted to punish the man beneath him for daring to ever hurt Carl, for daring to mention Kellin let alone in such a horrible way. Gabriel had called him a demon and Jason was going to live up to the name right there and then.

Suddenly, Jason felt a pair of arms wrap around his chest and pull him backwards. Whoever had grabbed him was strong enough to pull him off balance and onto the paving of the street, allowing Gabriel to get free. Jason spun his head round to the person restraining him, his fists ready to punish them for defending the priest. His heart sank when he realised who had grabbed him. Carl.

“Jason, stop. Please.” Carl pleaded with him. “He’s not worth it.”

“But he…” Jason tried to argue but was interrupted.

“I know what he said.” Carl cut him off sharply. “But he’s not worth it.”

“You should let him keep going.” Gabriel told him as he started to stand up slowly.

“Leave now! Go!” Carl roared back. It was the first time Jason had heard him so angry. “Don’t ever come near us again!”

Gabriel swallowed thickly and did as he was told. He walked away, heading in the direction of his church. In the sky above them, the colours were changing to the orange and purple mixtures that signalled the setting sun and the onset of the night. Carl helped Jason back up to his feet, holding him close to comfort him and calm him down.

“Let’s go home, it’s getting dark.” Carl told him, starting their walk back.

Jason breathed heavily, his knuckles throbbing with pain. “Why the hurry to get home?”

“Because you’ve got special plans, remember?” Carl answered, daring to smile at his boyfriend.

Jason smiled back, the pain and anger momentarily forgotten. “That I do.”

Jason kissed Carl’s forehead before holding his hand as they walked back towards the house. He knew he would need to face the reality of his angry lapse in self-control but for the time being he was grateful that Carl was more interested in having a good time. He vowed to make the night twice as good as it was originally going to be just for that.

 

Rick sat at the foot of his bed, contemplating what to say at the meeting that night. He could explain things aggressively again or he could do as Jason and Carl suggested, by being considerate and caring. Perhaps if he took a more honest, sincere approach they might finally listen to him. Otherwise, they would need to take over the community because Deanna’s ways of doing things were going to get everyone killed.

“Rick?” Michonne called softly from the door. “You ready?”

Rick glanced over his shoulder at her before sighing to himself. He had to be honest and he knew how much pain he had caused Michonne by lying to her. He had to put things right.

“Daryl, Carol and me, we worked it out together.” Rick explained as Michonne came into the room. “Carol took three guns from the armoury, I still have one, and she still has one.”

Michonne looked down at him sternly, glad to finally be hearing the truth despite the negative nature of it.

“We lied to you because I wasn’t sure how you’d take it, what you’d do.” Rick told her and held out the Walther P22 for the samurai to take.

Michonne licked her lips and closed her eyes momentarily. She felt a mix of anger and guilt at not being deemed trustworthy. After everything they had been through, all the things they had trusted one another with along with her close friendship with Carl. She tossed her jacket onto the bed and stared at Rick.

“You think I’d try to stop you?” She questioned the man.

Rick lowered the gun. “Well, you did hit me over the head.”

“That was for you. Not them.” Michonne countered sharply. She had known at the time that he was close to doing something he’d regret later.

Rick sighed and stood up before walking over to her. “I was afraid you’d talk me out of it. You could’ve.”

Michonne shook her head. “We don’t need them here. I don’t need my sword. I think you can find a way, we can find a way. And if we don’t, I’m still with you.”

Rick remained silent as he thought about it. She was repeating what Carl and especially Jason had already said to him. These people could be talked to, they were civilised and just needed to be approached the right way. If all else failed, the group would stick together like it always had done.

“Something’s going to happen.” Michonne told him. “Just don’t make something happen.”

Rick nodded and handed over the gun again. Michonne glanced down at it before placing her hand on top of his and pushing it back down. For all they knew he might still need the gun but she had every faith that he wouldn’t use it this time. He would try his best to convince the residents with his words and charisma instead.

Michonne grabbed her jacket off the bed and left the room. “Don’t be too long.”

Rick stuffed the gun into his jeans and sat back down on the bed. He pulled out his machete, unsheathing it from the cloth it was kept in and looked at the blade. He had used it to kill many walkers and people. It was one of the tools he had needed to stay alive outside the walls of Alexandria. Now that he was inside, however, it didn’t seem to hold the same significance anymore.

_“Hey. When you said they don’t get to live, you weren’t wrong.” Bob told Rick, referring to the Termites. “If we push ourselves and let things go, then we let some more go, some more and pretty soon there’s things we can’t get back.”_

_They continued walking, the birds on the rooftops above them were chirping as if the world wasn’t a deadly wasteland._

_“Things we couldn’t hold onto even if we tried.” Bob continued. “Washington is going to happen, Rick.”_

_“I haven’t decided if we’re going.” Rick replied._

_“Yeah, I know and that’s cool but you’ve seen Abraham in action.” Bob responded. “He’s going to get there and Eugene’s going to cure all of this and you’re going to find yourself in a place where it’s like how it used to be.”_

_Rick remained silent as Bob continued to speak his mind._

_“And if you let too much go along the way then that’s not going to work.” Bob continued. Then you’re going to be back in the real world.”_

_“_ _This_ _is the real world, Bob.” Rick answered, looking at the devastation of the ghost town around them._

_“No, this is a nightmare and nightmares end.” Bob answered with a laugh._

Rick sheathed the machete and paced the room, considering how he was going to explain everything they had been through. They had been through so much and lost so many people that it was hard to pick a decent starting point.

_The group started to walk out of the office so that Sasha could have her final moments with Bob. After that she would stab him in the head to prevent animation so that they could bury him with the dignity he deserved._

_“Rick.” Bob called weakly._

_Rick turned and realised Bob wanted a word. He went to hand Judith to Carl._

_“No, don’t. Let her stay.” Bob stopped him. “I trust her.”_

_Rick nodded and headed for the sofa. Jason placed a hand on Carl’s shoulder and gently guided him out of the office. It hurt him to see someone else go through what happened to Kellin but at least Sasha wasn’t alone. There was more comfort and dignity to Bob’s passing._

_“I’ll be right outside.” Sasha told him, leaving the office as well._

_Rick stood over Bob, holding Judith in his arms._

_“I just want to say thank you.” Bob told him with a weak smile._

_“For what?” Rick asked, somewhat confused._

_“Before the prison, I didn’t know if there were any good people left.” Bob explained softly. “I didn’t know if anybody was left.”_

_Rick sat on the sofa as Bob spoke._

_“You took me in because you took people in.” Bob continued. “It was you, man.”_

_Bob held his hand out and Rick took it in his own._

_“What I said yesterday, I ain’t revising it. Even in light of current events.” Bob told him, struggling to speak. “Nightmares end but they shouldn’t end who you are. And that is just this dead man’s opinion.”_

_Rick nodded and smiled faintly, finding it difficult to smile at all. “I’ll take it.”_

_Bob grinned. “Just look at her and tell me the world isn’t going to change.”_

_Bob was right and Rick knew it. Judith was the perfect symbol of hope in all the fear. She was the perfect symbol of light in the darkness._

Rick pulled the gun out of his jeans and laid it on the bed. He wasn’t sure if he would need it or not. Going without it would be a show of good faith and would eliminate the temptation to use it but going with it would keep him safe from every eventuality.

_Hershel tapped a patch of grass in the prison courtyard with one of his crutches._

_“Here.” He announced._

_Rick walked over to him, his jacket now on. “What is?”_

_“Those feral pigs in the forest? It doesn’t take much to domesticate them. Same with the horses we’ve seen.” Hershel explained. “We have seeds. We can grow our own food. It’s time we started planting.”_

_Rick nodded. It sounded reasonable and reduce the need for runs. “Okay.”_

_Hershel leaned forward slightly. “I can’t do it myself.”_

_Rick smiled as he glanced over at Daryl who was prepping his motorcycle for the next supply run._

_“I got to go out there.” Rick answered. “Go on runs, be at the fences.”_

_Hershel hopped closer. “I teach you how to do this. You teach Carl. We’re going to be here a while.”_

_Rick looked over at Daryl again. “They need me.”_

_“We’ve been here two months. You’ve made it work.” Hershel told him. The Governor was also gone. “The war is over, Rick.”_

_Rick refused to let his guard down so quickly. “No, we don’t know that.”_

_“I’m talking about you.” Hershel stared into Rick’s eyes. “I’m saying it, and I’m saying this. You pull Carl back from going out there, fine. He shot that boy.”_

_Rick looked down. That was one of his biggest failures as a father, failing to see the monster the world was turning his son into._

_“Yeah, I know.”_

_“He needs his father. He needs his father to show him the way.” Hershel continued. “What way are you going to show him?”_

_Rick studied Hershel as he tried to find an answer within his own mind. Though his responsibilities as a father were of the upmost importance, so were his responsibilities as a leader._

_“He can shoot, we know that. What’s his life going to be?” Hershel added. “What’s yours?”_

_Hershel looked around at the prison. They had people, food, water, space, thick walls, fences, weapons and organisation. They were surviving. They were living._

_“All this. I’m just saying everything because I owe you. We all owe you.” Hershel continued. “We can make this better now.”_

_Rick knew Hershel was right but at the same time they couldn’t afford to get complacent. The world outside of their fences was a nightmare, an endless nightmare filled with danger and death._

_“Things changing in here doesn’t change things out there.” Rick countered._

_“No it doesn’t. But we’re here right now, today.” Hershel answered. “This is a good place to start.”_

_Rick looked over at Daryl who was revving his engine to make sure there were no problems with the bike._

_“There’s a run soon.” Rick told the old man in front of him. “I got to go.”_

_Hershel smiled. “No, you don’t.”_

It was times like these when he missed Hershel the most. He had been so wise and had been a father figure to everyone. Rick often wondered what Hershel would have thought about everything they had seen since the prison, especially Alexandria.

Rick stuffed the gun into the back of his jeans. He would keep it as insurance but wouldn’t use it unless it was absolutely necessary. He stood up and looked out the window, everything seemed calm and he could see Jason and Carl coming back from their walk. Rick shifted his gaze towards the gate and narrowed his eyes. The gate was not only open slightly, but there was no one guarding it either. Someone had carelessly left it open. Rick grabbed his jacket and rushed out the room.

 

Jason and Carl returned home. They had just spotted Rick rushing out and assumed he was late for the meeting. They entered the house and closed the door behind them. Judith was crying from the sudden disappearance of her father so Carl quickly rushed over to her and lifted her out of her cot.

“I think she’s hungry.” Carl told the older teen as he sat down on one of the dining chairs with her.

“I’ll make her up a quick smoothie then.” Jason responded, happy to help care for the baby. “I think I have some left over from earlier.”

Jason made his way into the open kitchen and retrieved the plastic container from the fridge. It contained a slightly orange concoction that was a mix of various fruits and some homemade yoghurt. He poured some of it into a small jug and grabbed a spoon to feed her with. He quickly returned to the dining table and sat with Carl.

“You and your smoothies.” Carl sniggered as he presented the first spoonful to his hungry little sister.

“Get her used to a healthy diet now and we won’t need to fight her over it later.” Jason quipped with a smile, rubbing Carl’s back.

The two boys sat in silence while Carl fed Judith who had grown to like the smoothies a lot, given her appetite for it. The house was silent as they were the only two who were home, everyone else was either at the meeting or at the infirmary. Many other residents of the community were at home, having chosen not to attend the meeting.

“Do you think my dad can convince them not to kick him out?” Carl asked, breaking the silence as Judith consumed her last spoonful.

Jason took the jug and spoon back over to the sink to wash them. “Yeah, I think he can. That man can do anything when he puts his mind to it.”

Jason placed the jug and spoon on the washboard to dry before returning to the dining table. He noticed that Judith still had some energy left so he opened one of the nearby drawers and pulled out the music box. Carl smiled at him fondly, appreciating the idea. Jason smiled back before opening the box and winding up the gear.

The two teens sat in silence yet again. Carl bounced his little sister on his knee as she watched the little ballerina spin around inside the box, the little high pitched melody playing loudly in the quiet room. It was another one of those sweet, peaceful family moments that Jason loved so much.

For the first time in his life, he was able to supress the pangs of pain and regret that threatened to ruin the moment. He knew that it was something he had imagined a thousand times over with Kellin. They had discussed it so many times because Kellin simply adored kids, to the point that he had wanted a child before he was twenty. Jason remembered choking on his cereal the day Kellin had said that. He supressed the pain because he knew that wherever Kellin was, he would be happy simply watching Jason experience some form of parenthood with someone he loved.

 

Rick ran up the gate. It had clearly been left open carelessly by someone. He hoped that no one had noticed and there had been no walkers nearby. This minor slipup could be without consequence as long as he closed and locked the gate himself. Rick quickly glanced outside the gate. No signs of life or walkers. Good.

When he glanced down at the locking mechanism, his blood ran cold. A loose piece of putrid flesh was stick in the lock and there were blood splatters on the gate and the ground. At least one walker was inside the walls and no one knew about it. No one would be looking out for it. Rick quickly closed the gate and locked it before running back into the community. He had to find and kill the walker before it killed anyone.

 

Jason and Carl closed the bedroom door behind them. Judith was fast asleep in Rick’s room and the walls were thin enough that they would hear her crying if she woke up. Carl dropped down on the bed as he took off his boots and socks. Jason swallowed thickly as he watched him. It was time.

“So, what was your special plan?” Carl asked his boyfriend with an expectant grin.

Jason shuddered under his gaze, casting his eyes to his own feet for a moment. “I was wondering and…uh…hoping if you wanted to go all the way tonight?”

Carl’s eyes widened and his mouth fell open. He wasn’t sure how to react, though Jason’s question had made his heart skip a few beats as he felt himself twitch inside his jeans.

“You mean…” Carl trailed off in surprise.

“Yeah. I want to make love to you, Carl.” Jason confessed, finally having the courage to stare back at him.

Carl’s body shook with excitement as his face flushed red. He nodded tentatively. “Yeah…um…yeah.”

“Are you sure?” Jason asked, detecting his uncertainty.

Carl was quick to nod. “Yes. I want you to. I want you to be my first.”

Jason took a breath and pulled out the supplies from his jacket pockets. “I got some things from Eric to make things easier.”

“To make it hurt less?” Carl offered a potential use for the unknown items in Jason’s gloved hands.

Jason nodded. “Yeah. I want to make this night unforgettable.”

“It will be.” Carl assured him with a heavy breath of excitement.

 

Rick ran down the street in search of the walker. He slowed to a brisk walk and looked down at the road to trail the blood splatters but the trail had ran cold. There were no blood splatters to help him find the walker. He would have to find it the old fashioned way by searching around all the houses for any signs of it. Rick refused to allow anyone to die because of someone’s carelessness. He refused to let his children die because of someone’s carelessness. Rick started running, hoping the sounds of his footsteps might attract the walker.

 

A large number of the residents sat in Deanna’s courtyard. There were roughly forty people who had decided to attend the meeting. Among them were Eugene, Abraham, Maggie, Michonne and Carol. Jessie had also chosen to attend the meeting as it was sparked by Rick’s fight with her husband, Pete. Eric, Aaron’s boyfriend had also chosen to attend. Deanna stood in the corner with her remaining family members, Reg and Spencer. It was dark and the night air was cold so they had built a fire in the centre of the courtyard. They were all waiting for Rick and Glenn to show up.

“We’re going to start.” Deanna finally announced.

“Can we wait?” Maggie asked. “There are still people coming, Glenn, Rick.”

“We’re going to start. It’s already dark.” Deanna countered. “We’re gonna talk about what happened, not the fight, not what precipitated it, we’re dealing with that.”

The crowd was silent and grim faced as Deanna introduced the subject matter of the meeting.

“We’re gonna talk about one of our constables, Rick Grimes. We’re gonna talk about how he had a pistol he stole from the armoury, how he pointed it at people and we’re gonna talk about what he said.” Deanna explained to them. “I was hoping he’d be here.”

“She said he’s coming.” Michonne spoke up with a smile.

“I’m sure he’ll be here and then I’m sure we can work this all out.” Carol added timidly, also smiling.

 

Nicholas limped through the dark woods. He had lost his gun so he was defenceless and disorientated in the darkness of night. The moonlight gently illuminated the woods to provide him with some light to see in. His heart was pounding. He had left Glenn for dead and was now free from any problems that the man could cause. All he had to do now was get back and tell a story.

Nicholas emerged into a small clearing in the woodland. He stopped to try and get his bearings as he knew he was close to Alexandria at this point. He leaned against a tree trunk and quietly took a moment to get his breath back. A twig snapped behind him causing Nicholas to look over his shoulder. Glenn suddenly emerged from the darkness, covered in blood and hooked him in the jaw, knocking the curly haired man onto the ground.

Nicholas lay on the ground and tried to get back up. He was dazed from Glenn’s punch and was in a lot of pain. Glenn stood over him before kneeling on top of him and punching him as hard as he could in the face, bursting open the man’s lip some more. Glenn lifted his head before slamming it back into the ground and pinned the curly haired man down.

“Noah died because of you and I tried to tell you how it is, how it has to be!” Glenn growled furiously. “And you tried to kill me!”

Nicholas shook his head, scared that he was living his final moments. His fears were confirmed when Glenn pulled out his stolen Glock 19 and pressed the barrel against his forehead. Nicholas whined with fear as he stared up at Glenn in terror.

“I was scared! I was scared!” Nicholas pleaded for his life. “I don’t belong!”

“Just shut up.” Glenn hissed as he struggled to pull the trigger.

“I was scared, please!” Nicholas continued to plead.

“Shut up.” Glenn hissed again. He had never taken a life before.

“I don’t belong!” Nicholas ignored him, pleading incessantly to live.

“Shut up!” Glenn bellowed angrily as he fought with his conscience over pulling the trigger.

After crying out a few more times Nicholas simply accepted his fate and fell silent. He squeezed his eyes shut and waited for the end, regretting the choices he had made as it meant he’d never see his son, Mikey again. He wouldn’t get to apologise to everyone for getting Noah killed. He wouldn’t get to tell Deanna the truth. His story was over and wasn’t ending the way he wanted.

Glenn shook with rage and frustration, the gun trembling in his hands as he tried to pull the trigger. The voice of morality inside his head begged him not to, telling him that Nicholas had learned his lesson this time and would be punished severely upon their return. Glenn cried out and pulled the gun away before dropping down beside Nicholas. He cried because he couldn’t end it. He cried for Noah. Nicholas cried in regret. He cried in relief. Glenn was giving him a chance he didn’t deserve.

 

Carl shook with excitement as Jason eased him back on the bed, their lips locked together while their tongues duelled for dominance. Their jackets had been discarded on the floor moments before and Jason’s hands were already slipping under Carl’s shirt. The younger didn’t want to be out done and wrapped his arms around Jason’s neck while his legs wrapped around his hips to pull him down closer.

They both groaned into the kiss as their bodies pressed together. Jason broke the kiss to gently bite Carl’s neck, drawing a gasp of pleasure from his younger lover beneath him as his hands continued to slide up Carl’s smooth skin, pushing his shirt up the further they went. Once he found Carl’s nipples, he teased them gently with his fingers as he bit Carl’s neck again, knowing that it was a sensitive spot for Carl.

Carl moaned again and used his legs to push their bodies together again. He knew Jason could feel how hard he was under his jeans, he had to feel it because Carl could certainly feel Jason’s imprisoned length. His heart was beating fast and hard with excitement and anticipation. This was going to be different to anything they had ever done. This was going to be what he had wanted since he read the diary passage back at the church.

_“Relax, Carl.” Jason cooed and raised his hand. “I’m not angry.”_

_Carl’s shoulders dropped as some of the tension left his body. He put the diary back in Jason’s bag and stood up, the bulge in his jeans still visible. Jason closed the distance between them and hugged Carl close to him before removing the younger teen’s hat so he could kiss him softly. Jason recognised the look in Carl’s eyes. Hunger._

_“Did you enjoy reading it?” Jason asked him nervously._

_He didn’t want to start anything sexual but he couldn’t help but ask how Carl felt about what he had read._

_Carl nodded nervously. “Can we do that sometime?”_

_Jason felt the air leave his lungs. What a question. It confirmed that it was definitely something Carl wanted to do in their relationship._

_“Yeah, eventually.” Jason answered, fighting to maintain his self-control. He wanted nothing more than to touch his young lover right there and then._

Carl was brought out of his memories by his shirt being pulled slowly over his head. He raised his hands to make it easier before Jason tossed it to the floor. Jason pushed him back down on his back and took a moment to stare down at him. He wasn’t sure when his feelings for the younger teen had truly started but he was sure that it didn’t actually matter. He was so madly in love with the boy below him it was scary. Jason had vowed never to fall in love again yet here he was about to make love to Carl for the first time.

Carl blushed under Jason’s heavy gaze before reaching up to unbutton Jason’s grey shirt. Jason watched him with a heavy gaze as he undid each button one at a time until the shirt had been opened. Jason pulled it off and tossed it to the floor as well. Carl wanted to scream inside because Jason still had a black shirt underneath. Sensing his irritation, Jason smirked before grabbing his shirt at its base and pulled it over his head, dumping it on the floor behind him.

Carl smiled approvingly as Jason lowered himself so that they were face to face again. Jason captured Carl’s lips in a searing kiss as they both revelled in the feeling of skin on skin. The only interruption being their matching necklaces. The room was starting to get rather hot despite the air outside being bitterly cold. Jason’s mouth descended to Carl’s throat, pushing the younger’s head back to gain access while his hands rubbed over Carl’s flat tummy. Jason continued to kiss his way down past Carl’s collarbones until he reached one of his nipples.

Carl gasped out loudly when Jason gently bit one of the small nubs, licking it with his tongue gently while his fingers teased the other nipple. Jason was being so much slower and passionate than any of their previous sexual encounters. He was determined to burn this night into his memory forever and make sure Carl could never forget it, no matter what happened to him. Jason swapped his mouth and fingers over as Carl mewled beneath him, paying close attention so he could etch every sound, smell, sight and sensation into his memory.

Carl surprised Jason by pulling his head back up for a passionate kiss. Jason accepted the kiss without hesitation, his tongue teasing Carl’s yet again before he gasped into the kiss in surprise when Carl rolled them over. Carl wanted to have some fun as well, he wasn’t just going to lie on the bed and let Jason do everything. He broke the kiss and kissed his way down Jason’s torso, paying special attention to his nipples and navel before resting his hands on Jason’s belt.

Carl looked up at Jason to make sure it was okay for him to keep going. Jason gave him a reassuring nod so he unbuckled the belt and undone his jeans before pushing them down the older teen’s legs with a little help. He smirked at the sight of the prominent tent in Jason’s boxers and rubbed his hand over it, earning a hiss from Jason. He opted not to torture his older lover and pulled his boxers down, freeing his rock hard member.

Jason’s breathing became heavier as he watched his length disappear into Carl’s mouth. Carl kept his eyes locked on Jason’s own as he took more and more of Jason’s shaft into his warm, wet mouth. Once he had half of it in his mouth he gripped the lower half with one of his hands and started a combination of bobbing his head and pumping his fist. Jason fisted the bed sheets beneath him and choked out Carl’s name as Carl gradually increased his pace, his inexperienced tongue started to lap at the tip with each downward bob. Jason didn’t think he would ever get over the sight of Carl with his lips around him.

After a few more moments, Jason pulled Carl off of his length and rolled them back over.

“As much as I’d love to cum in your mouth.” Jason spoke into his ear, his voice deep with lust. “I have bigger and better things planned.”

Carl felt his heartrate accelerate as Jason undone and pulled down his jeans and boxers in one swift, practiced movement. Jason made his way back up to Carl’s crimson flushed face and crashed his lips against Carl’s as his hand gently stroked Carl’s manhood. The younger moaned into the kiss, trembling with excitement as he knew the best part was about to begin.

“You’re so beautiful, Carl.” Jason cooed in his ear, still stroking him slowly. “I’m gonna take good care of you, I promise.”

Jason quickly lowered himself so that he was level with Carl’s throbbing member. He reached over and opened the plastic tub of lubricant that he received from Eric. He coated two of his fingers in the substance before he slowly took Carl’s erection into his mouth. As Carl’s length slipped past his lips, one of his fingers gently eased itself inside of Carl.

Carl gasped from the feeling of the cold liquid against his sensitive entrance. He now fully understood why Jason had chosen to prepare him over the past couple days. He didn’t feel any pain when Jason’s finger slid in with the assistance of the lube. Jason smiled around Carl’s shaft and started to slowly bob his head as he slipped a second finger inside Carl. The second finger was met with a little resistance but it was nothing like before, especially now that there was far less friction.

Carl’s breaths came out as short, sharp gasps as Jason gently pumped his fingers back and forth, slowly spreading them to stretch Carl in preparation for what was to come. Jason made sure to focus on Carl’s member, bobbing his head a little faster and further while licking the tip to distract Carl with the pleasure. It was working as Carl’s limbs had effectively turned into jelly in response to Jason’s ministrations.

Jason pulled his fingers out, making Carl instantly feel empty. He lifted his head off Carl’s weeping length and smiled fondly down at him, his lips puffed up slightly. Jason grabbed one of the plastic packets and tore it open with his teeth and let Carl watch him as he slipped the condom on. In a zombie apocalypse, he did not want to take any chances. Carl felt himself throb even harder and the room temperature rise several degrees as he watched Jason coat his shaft with the lube. It was finally time.

Jason lifted Carl’s legs up until they were vertical and pressed the tip of his manhood against Carl’s slicked entrance. He felt his legs and hands tremble with erotic excitement. He had wanted to do this for so long and now he was about to be inside this boy he had fallen in love with after the world ended. Carl was also trembling, preparing himself for the initial pain but well aware that the pleasure that would follow would be indescribable.

Jason leaned down, his tip still rubbing against the younger teen’s entrance as he kissed Carl slowly and lovingly. He wanted to express all the love for Carl that was flooding through him in one single kiss. He knew it was impossible but he tried anyway. They broke apart and stared into each other’s eyes, getting lost in each other’s souls and the memories of their time together. All the sweet, cute and loving moments had been a build up to this.

They both could remember vividly how they first met.

_Jason made it to the top of the stairs just as he heard one of the bedroom doors slam shut. He aimed his gun at the direction of the noise and studied the sight before him. With their back against the door as they tried to catch their breath was a boy. He couldn’t be any older than sixteen. He had a gun holster on the right thigh of his jeans but no gun. His dirty top was blue and grey. His long dark hair whipped out from under the sheriff’s hat he wore but the most striking thing was that he only had one boot on. Before Jason could make any more observations the boy froze as he finally became aware of Jason’s presence. He didn’t say anything. His eyes darted to his gun that lay on the floor, too far away to reach quickly. He stared back at Jason with an intense look of fear in his blue eyes._

_Sensing that the boy was afraid of him, Jason decided to attempt communication but kept his gun aimed at the boy._

_“Hey, kid.” He said calmly. “You okay?”_

_The boy stared at him for a moment, his breath still uneven. “I’m not a kid.”_

_Jason smirked but didn’t lower his aim. “Yeah, well you aren’t a man yet either.”_

_The boy didn’t answer him, unsure of how to respond._

_“What’s your name?” Jason asked him, trying to keep his tone friendly._

_The boy appeared to hesitate for a moment before finally answering. “Carl.”_

They remembered the strange connection they instantly shared, a sense of trust that seemed so normal between them. Normal enough for Carl to offer some of his coveted chocolate pudding.

_Carl watched as he holstered the gun again. “When my Dad wakes up, he’ll want to talk to you.” He told the young man. “Find out if you’re a threat.”_

_“I can handle that.” Jason told him before lying back to look up at the sky as Carl continued to eat. “But for now, let’s enjoy the peacefulness of the afternoon.”_

_Carl seemed to agree and continued eating the pudding before he stopped, looking at the half empty can._

_“Do you want some?” He asked Jason, suddenly feeling quite selfish._

_“What?” Jason asked, having been lost in his thoughts for a moment._

_“Do you want some pudding?” Carl asked again._

_“No thanks. You’ve been through a lot today.” Jason replied with a smile. “You have it.”_

They both remembered their many close moments, cute little actions that were a result of their underlying feelings for one another that neither of them wanted to reveal first. Jason especially remembered his frustration at wanting someone he thought he could never have.

_“Michonne told me that love is something you act on.” Carl told him, though his hesitant tone showed he still didn’t fully understand what that meant._

_“She’s right. The people you know could all die tomorrow.” Jason answered, placing a hand on the boy’s shoulder. “How you make them feel before their time comes is so,_ _so important for that very reason.”_

_“So you should love someone even if you don’t have long?” Carl asked, trying to understand Jason’s way of thinking._

_“Absolutely. I’d rather die having experienced love than died without ever knowing what it felt like.” Jason told him, rubbing his shoulder gently. “You should get some sleep.”_

_Carl closed his eyes and sighed. “I’m trying but I can’t relax enough.”_

_Jason moved his hand to the back of Carl’s neck, placing his fingers strongly against it. This earned a gasp from Carl._

_“Your hand is freezing!” Carl gasped out._

_“Yeah, but it will relax you. Hold still.” Jason told him._

_Jason kept his cold hand on the back of Carl’s neck and sure enough the teen began to relax. After a while he could tell Carl was asleep, the expression on his face having softened completely. Jason retracted his hand and quietly stepped out of the car. He put his hands in his jacket pockets and stared up at the stars and thought about his conversation with Carl. He felt it was a shame that Carl still hadn’t experienced the warmth that he himself had felt with Kellin. It was different to friendship or the love of family. It was so much stronger and more intense. He would give that gift, that experience to Carl if he could but it wasn’t his place and never would be._

One of the most important memories that shot through both their minds was that of their first kiss. It felt appropriate to remember the awkward naturalness of their first kiss when they were on the cusp of making love for the first time. They smiled fondly at one another, clearly reliving the same memory.

_Carl turned to look at him and realised their faces were quite close together as a result of examining the scars. Jason realised this too and smirked._

_“We’re kinda close.” He teased._

_Jason had meant it as a joke but Carl couldn’t help but blush at the comment. He knew he cared a lot about Jason. It was obvious to most of the group when they had believed him to be dead at Terminus. Michonne, as his most trusted friend, knew that Jason had become very important to Carl. He felt his heart pound in his chest. He wanted something but he wasn’t sure what it was._

_Jason noticed the blush and the slight change in Carl’s breathing. He was suddenly nervous and Jason couldn’t figure out why. Their faces were close together and he had made a light joke about it but now neither of them seemed to want to move._

_“What’s up?” Jason asks quietly, concerned for Carl._

_Carl stuttered, their eyes meeting. He could see the nervousness and pain inside those blue eyes._

_“I…I don’t know.” Carl answered. His face was still red and Jason’s questions weren’t helping._

_Jason moved his face a little closer to Carl’s. They could feel each other’s breath against their faces with how close they were. He was starting to piece it together._

_“Carl?” Jason whispered, not taking his eyes off the teen’s. “Do you _like_  me?”_

_Carl swallowed nervously as his blush intensified. His eyes darted between Jason’s eyes and Jason’s lips. He had never been this close to someone in his life. He had never felt this rush of adrenaline before, it was different from the adrenaline produced by fear or rage. It felt good. There was another feeling but Carl didn’t know how to describe it. Jason’s questioned returned to his mind, realising he awkwardly hadn’t answered it yet. It was an important question. Carl wasn’t sure what his answer was. He was feeling too many new and different things._

_“I…I don’t know.” Carl repeated, his face flaming up with embarrassment._

_Jason felt the very same adrenaline coursing through him. He had noticed how Carl’s eyes darted from his eyes to his lips, how he swallowed nervously and how red his face had turned. He recalled that Carl had never been intimate with anyone in his life. This situation was new to him and he didn’t know how to react. Although he said he didn’t know if he liked Jason or not, Jason took that as a positive reaction. He had to guide Carl through this. He had to make a decision._

_Carl’s eyes widened as Jason closed the gap between them. He felt warm lips on his own. They were soft and gentle. Nothing was forced. His heartbeat accelerated. This was what he had wanted. This was why he had got so nervous. The feeling he couldn’t describe was want. Desire. Jason pulled away slightly and gazed into Carl’s eyes, looking for any signs of rejection. He couldn’t find any._

_“Is this okay?” Jason asked, placing a hand gently on the back of Carl’s neck._

_Carl swallowed nervously again and nodded slowly._

Jason leaned down to kiss Carl again, the kiss was soft and gentle this time. It was his way of telling Carl that he was about to start. Carl kissed back enthusiastically, knowing what it meant as he wrapped his arms around the back of Jason’s neck.

With a very slow, very gentle movement, Jason eased his length inside Carl. He was met with greater resistance than before due to his manhood being larger than his two fingers. Carl whimpered as pain shot through him, his entrance burning as it was stretched that little bit more than before. Jason kissed Carl forcefully and brought a hand down to stroke his softening member. Carl’s whimpers of pain slowly transformed into whines of pleasure as Jason managed to sheath himself inside of his younger lover.

Both of them took the moment to bask in the incredible sensation of their unity. After so much time together, so much fighting, surviving and loving, they were finally together. Their bodies matched their hearts. Joined. Carl had never felt anything like it in his life, he felt so full and complete with Jason lodged so snuggly inside him. Jason was panting above him, the hot, vice like nature of Carl’s virginity almost overwhelming him.

Jason ghosted his lips over Carl’s before capturing them in another soft, gentle lip lock. They stayed like that for several moments, their lips and bodies joined with their hearts pounding in their heads. Eventually, Jason pulled back enough to break the kiss but remained close enough for his breath to caress Carl's skin as he spoke.

“I love you, Carl.” Jason gasped out, his breathing heavy. “Fuck, I love you so much.”

Carl almost felt totally overwhelmed with emotion as Jason’s necklace gently tapped his own. “I love you too.”

Jason captured Carl’s lips with his own yet again as he made his first thrust, immediately making the younger teen whimper and making himself groan. Carl was so incredibly hot and tight around him he didn’t think he would last long at all. Jason breathed deeply as he made a second thrust, followed by a third as he picked up a slow and gentle rhythm, easing Carl into the new sensation.

Carl’s entrance burned from the stretching and the movement but with each patient thrust from Jason the pain decreased slightly. Carl had never felt so full and complete as he did in that moment, there was something exquisite about having his lover inside of him and as the pain fully faded it was replaced with the most powerful desire he had ever felt. Carl bit Jason’s collarbone and clawed at his back, bucking his hips as a sign for Jason to really start moving.

Jason increased the pace of his movements, intoxicated by the pleasure shooting through his body like a powerful electric current that had the most erotic soundtrack in the form of Carl’s whimpers and gasps of pleasure. Jason knew that he could do better, he could make it so much better for Carl and take the younger boy by complete surprise. Jason rolled his hips and tried to angle himself differently, trying to find that special nub inside Carl.

A sudden, loud and high pitched yelp of pleasure confirmed when he had found it. Carl stared up at him with wide eyes and dilated pupils, his face flushed and strands of hair sticking to his head due to perspiration. Jason was in a similar state, each breath shuddering through him as he continued to thrust a little faster and a little harder, constantly aiming for that special spot that had Carl almost crying in ecstasy.

Carl couldn’t believe that he was finally experiencing true love making. He had read Jason’s diary entry multiple times in secret but he never could have imagined the pleasure firing through his system. He struggled for breath, his limbs had turned to jelly, the room was boiling hot around him and his whole body trembled with pleasure as the coils in his abdomen continued to tighten more and more. Stars danced across his eyes each time the head of Jason’s shaft struck that special bundle of nerves somewhere inside of him, causing him to involuntarily cry out each time.

Jason knew neither of them were going to last. It was Carl’s first time and he had already fallen apart from the pleasure with Jason struggling to hold it together and keep his movements consistent. Carl’s moans were louder with each thrust and the tip of his hardened length was leaking more and more. Jason licked his lips and decided to completely wreck Carl with his love.

Carl moaned into the kiss, Jason’s mouth doing little to muffle the volume of it as the older teen increased the speed and strength of his thrusts. Jason was chasing his orgasm but wanted to push Carl into total nirvana before he reached his limit. Carl tightened his grip on Jason’s neck when he felt his lover’s hand wrap itself around his weeping shaft and start stroking it blindingly fast. Carl broke the kiss for air and to moan. He was so loud, his heart pounding in his chest as he felt light headed from ecstasy. Carl couldn’t hold on much longer.

Each loud, passionate moan from Carl brought Jason even closer to the edge of completion. He was determined to make Carl finish before him or at the same time at the latest. He refused to finish before he had brought Carl over the edge. Jason’s member throbbed inside of Carl as the younger’s inner walls tightened around him even more than they previously had. They were both so close. Their abdomens burned almost painfully from the tight coiling inside of them as they neared completion.

“Jason!” Carl suddenly cried out.

It was sudden and powerful. He couldn’t hold back his orgasm from the combined pleasure of Jason’s thrusts and strokes. Carl’s whole body shook, his hips bucked violently and the room started spinning as he tossed his head back and cried out incoherently. Jason watched with wide eyes as Carl exploded over Jason’s hand and his own abdomen in the most powerful orgasm he had ever had.

That was all it took. Watching Carl reach completion and completely fall apart from the exquisite pleasure was all it took for Jason to hit his own climax. Jason cried out something equally nonsensical, though it may have been Carl’s name, as Carl’s walls squeezed his shaft and his bucking hips pushed the older teen into nirvana. Jason trembled as he shot inside the condom while still deep inside of Carl, giving a few last thrusts to ride out the shockingly powerful orgasm that had turned his body into mush.

 

Rick ran down the main street, the only light coming from the moon and some of the house windows. It would be the light in the windows that would attract the walker and yet he still couldn’t find any sign of it. Rick knew better than to assume it had wandered back out of the gate instead of entering the community.

A dog started barking loudly, it was Trisha’s dog, Brodie. Rick grabbed his gun and then had a second thought. He couldn’t allow everyone to hear the gunshot. He placed the gun back in his jeans and withdrew a large knife from his inside jacket pocket before running towards Brodie’s barks.

Rick ran through to the back garden and found Brodie barking from inside the back room. The door was closed and he was barking from the other side of the glass. Rick looked around in the darkness. The walker had to be close by. It wouldn’t ignore Brodie’s barks. A loud rasp caught his attention and revealed its source to be the walker which was stumbling towards him.

 

 “And after being out there and then not being how you were out there, it could drive you crazy.” Michonne explained in the meeting. It was currently her turn to speak. “Rick just wants his family to live. He wants all of you to live. Who he is is who you’re gonna be.”

The crowd were quiet while Michonne explained this. They found it hard to believe that they would change into someone like Rick. They were all still very naïve to the chaos and troubles that existed outside the walls and how the constant threat to survival drove you to evolve. Michonne saw that but she had hope that they would understand.

“If you’re lucky.” She decided to add, because she knew not all of them would survive.

 

Rick grabbed the walker by the neck before stabbing it firmly in the side of the head with his knife. The snarling stopped as its body went limp and fell to the ground. A second walker approached Rick which he pushed back against the wall. A third walker, this time a female also stumbled towards him in an effort to bite him. Rick grabbed it by the neck and spun it off balance so that it slammed into the side of a house before he stabbed it through the forehead.

 

“Rick Grimes saved my life over and over. There’s terrifying people out there and he rescued me from them.” Carol told the group at the meeting, continuing to play possum. “People like me, people like us need people like him.”

Deanna lowered her gaze in reflection. They were all making a very convincing case for keeping Rick in Alexandria, as it was true that they needed someone with the knowledge and conviction to survive. These were important factors in finding someone who could protect the community, which Rick had already been doing from the moment he set foot in Alexandria.

“I know what happened last night was scary and I’m sure he’s sorry for that.” Carol continued, her arms folded from the cold. “But maybe we should listen to what he was saying.”

 

The final walker stumbled over to Rick and grabbed his shoulders, pushing the man off balance and knocking him onto his back. Rick used both his arms to lift the walker up and away from his face and neck. He grabbed its neck with one hand while his other hand reached down to his gun. The walker continued to rasp and snarl in his face as its teeth continued to knock together with each unsuccessful bite.

Rick brought his gun up to the walker’s face. He knew he couldn’t fire the gun in the open as everyone at the meeting would hear it and panic. Instead, he brought the gun under the walkers chin and used all of his strength to start pushing the barrel of the gun inside the walker. The decaying monstrosity snarled louder as its head was pushed up by the metal barrel of the gun being pushed inside its skull from under its mouth. Rick kept pushing the gun further and further into the walker’s skull until his fist was against its rotting skin.

Rick growled with effort as he continued to push his gun into the walker’s head. He lifted the walker as high above him as his arms would allow, the monstrosity still snarling loudly as its head start vibrating from the build-up of pressure. Rick’s arms burned from exertion but his will to live over powered any fatigue that was building.

Suddenly, Rick pulled the trigger. The walker’s skull muffled the gunshot and caused the walker’s face to explode with blood shooting out of its eyes, mouth and nose. The blood landed on Rick’s face, causing him to close his eyes and mouth in disgust as he pushed the walker’s body onto the grass beside him. It had been a very close call for him but he had survived to fight another day. All three walkers had been taken care of. He wiped his face and finally decided on how he would present his case at the meeting.

 

 “Simply put there is a vast ocean of shit that you people don’t know shit about.” Abraham told them flatly and crudely. “Rick knows every fine grain of said shit and then some.”

He glared at them all. It wasn’t in his nature to be polite or particularly well mannered. They didn’t know what the world was and he was telling them that bluntly. They live behind their big walls in their warm, cosy homes and throw their little cocktail parties while the rest of the world outside is rotting and dying. It is an insult for any of them to even consider judging Rick Grimes or anyone in their group of survivors.

 

Jason and Carl lay in bed together. They were both still panting as they slowly came down from their orgasmic highs. Jason carefully pulled the covers over their fatigued bodies that pulsed with every heartbeat. Carl cuddled into Jason’s slightly larger form, burying his head into the crook of Jason’s neck as they wrapped their arms around each other.

“Wow…” Carl breathed out, his voice hoarse from all the moaning and crying he had done.

“Wow indeed.” Jason laughed lightly, his voice also scratchy. “I take it that was up to expectations?”

Jason felt Carl nod against his shoulder. “Beyond them.”

Jason smiled and kissed Carl’s forehead gently. “I love you so much, Carl.”

“I love you just as much.” Carl replied, lifting his head up to gaze into Jason’s eyes.

Jason noticed how their pupils were still dilated. “No, I love you more.”

“Why’s that?” Carl asked him with a cheeky grin.

“Because you saved me, Carl. You gave me something to fight for. I would have been dead by now.” Jason confessed lowly, stroking Carl’s head. “You showed me that I could still love, that I wasn’t too far gone. That’s why I love you more.”

Carl was about to respond and tell Jason how important he was too but Jason prevented him from doing so. Carl closed his eyes and pulled Jason closer to him when their lips locked together yet again. This gentle kiss was Jason’s way of saying thank you. It was saying more than his verbal confession ever could.

When they broke apart Jason gazed into Carl’s eyes and stroked his cheek. “I’ll never leave you, I promise.”

 

 “My father respected Rick Grimes. Rick is a father too. He’s a man with a good heart.” Maggie told them all. “He feels the things he does. The things he has to do. And all of us who were together before this place, no matter when we found each other, we’re family now.”

It was the truth. The group had bonded on such a level that they were a family. No one was more important than anyone else and even though fights and disagreements would be had, they would always band together. This was proven when they faced the challenges of Terminus, Grady Memorial and the tornado that hit while out on the road.

“Rick started that and you won’t stop it.” Maggie warned them all, glaring at Deanna. “You can’t and you don’t want to. This community, you people, that family, you wanna be a part of it too.”

All of the group’s speeches had been very convincing and it led Deanna to feel very unsettled. If any of them were to hear what Gabriel had told her it would be jarring. If Jason ever decided to tell anyone about how he blackmailed Deanna then her position as leader would be placed in question within the community. She decided it was best if both of these points were raised by her instead.

“Before we hear from anyone else, I would like to share some things in the spirit of transparency.” Deanna told them all, standing closer to the fire so she could warm her frozen hands. “Father Gabriel came to see me the day before yesterday and he said our new arrivals can’t be trusted, that they were dangerous, that they would put themselves before this community.”

Maggie’s expression was stern as she listened to what Deanna was telling them. She had kept her knowledge of Gabriel’s visit a secret and all this did was fill her with renewed anger. She had half a mind to find Father Gabriel and beat him senseless.

“And not one day later, Rick seemed to demonstrate all the things Father Gabriel said.” Deanna continued. “I would have hoped Gabriel would be here tonight.”

“I don’t see him here, Deanna.” Jessie spoke up, annoyed. “So you’re just saying what someone said. Did you tape him?”

“He’s not here.” Maggie added.

“Neither is Rick.” Deanna countered sharply.

Maggie glared back at Deanna. She hated that the woman in front of her was going to trust Gabriel over everyone else.

“Excuse me.” Maggie said politely before leaving the courtyard in search of Gabriel.

“The other thing I would like to mention is about one of our other residents, Jason Clarke. He did not go on a supply run a few days ago. I exiled him over his fights with Kevin and Nicholas.” Deanna told the rest of them. “However, that same day he came back and threatened me with a gun in my living room. He claimed that Kevin and Tony had tried to kill him, so in retaliation he killed them in cold blood.”

Everyone was silent, shocked at the revelations. They were as shocked to hear that Jason had killed the two men as they were to hear that Deanna hadn’t told them about his exile.

“He offered to make a deal. He would tell a story to hide the truth over my decision to exile him and in return all I had to do was let him stay.” Deanna continued. “Since then I have learned that while acting as a teacher, he has been teaching our oldest children how to use weapons and fight the infected. He has done so without the permission of anyone else.”

“You can’t condemn him for defending himself, Deanna.” Jessie spoke up again. “And I’m sorry but Kevin and Tony weren’t good guys. We all saw how they treated Aaron and Eric.”

“Are you saying they deserved to die?” A man from the back of the crowd barked.

“No! I’m saying they might have brought it on themselves.” Jessie retorted. “I know Jason, he’s a good guy.”

“He’s teaching the children how to be violent, Jessie.” Tobin spoke up angrily.

“As wrong as it is for him to do it without permission, all he’s doing is teaching them to survive.” Carol spoke up, still acting innocent. “When we first met he offered to teach me more things so I could stay alive. I’m really grateful to him for that.”

 

Jason broke away from his lip lock with Carl. He could have sworn he heard the front door open downstairs. He strained his ears to listen closer for any sounds, placing his hand over Carl’s mouth to signal him to be quiet. That’s when he heard the unmistakable sound of footsteps. One person and they were walking slowly. Jason’s instincts told him either someone was sneaking around or a walker had somehow got inside. Had the meeting gone bad?

“Wait here, I’m gonna see who’s down there.” Jason whispered to Carl.

Carl was going to argue but knew it was pointless. He sat up in the bed as he watched Jason quickly throw on his jeans and long sleeved black shirt. Jason gave Carl a reassuring smile before opening the bedroom door as quietly as he could before closing it gently behind him.

Jason silently made his way down the hall towards the staircase and descended it one stair at a time. He clenched his fists as he tried to prepare himself for whatever was lurking in the rooms below. His body was fatigued from sex but adrenaline was providing him with surplus energy to use to defend his home.

Jason made his way to the bottom of the stairs and found a tall man standing in the living room staring at Michonne’s sword which was mounted on the wall. The jeans and grey jacket were a giveaway to the identity of the blonde haired man. The man raised his hand towards the sword.

“Don’t even think about it.” Jason challenged loudly and sternly.

Pete whipped his head around, startled by Jason’s voice. He scowled at the teen and took a step towards him. Jason also took a couple steps towards the man. He didn’t fear the surgeon as memories of his uncle flooded through his mind. They were the same. Both of them violent alcoholics who wrecked lives.

“Back off!” Pete warned him, closing in.

“You know, my uncle was an angry, alcoholic bastard just like you.” Jason hissed venomously. “And just like you, he got the tar kicked out of him.”

“I’m warning you!” Pete growled angrily.

Jason knew what Pete had in mind. He had come to take Michonne’s katana and use it to kill Rick. It wasn’t hard to figure out and it wasn’t something Jason was going to stand by and just let happen.

“Get out or I’ll put you in the ground.” Jason threatened him, realising that rage was dictating the surgeon’s actions.

Pete didn’t answer, he simply lunged forward and slammed Jason into the wall. Jason was quick to deliver a powerful kick to Pete’s groin, causing the man to let go of him as he doubled over with a groan of pain. Jason quickly punched Pete twice in the face, trying to strike his wounds from the fight the night before.

Pete was stronger than Jason had anticipated or perhaps the alcohol in his system was numbing the pain because he pushed himself back up to full height. Pete quickly grabbed Jason’s head and slammed it against the wall, dizzying the teen who fought to break free from his grip. Jason grabbed the back of Pete’s head with his hands and pulled the man’s head towards his own, crashing their heads together.

Pete stumbled back and groaned in pain as Jason also stumbled, his eyes watering from the blow to his head. He was still dizzy from Pete slamming his head against the wall and as a result failed to see Pete’s backhand in time. Pete struck Jason across the face strongly, knocking him off balance and causing him to stumble over his left side across the room. Suddenly, gravity won and pulled Jason off his feet, the back of his head slamming against the corner of the coffee table with a painful thud.

Pete stood and waited but Jason just lay there motionless. The angry drunk let out a breath of relief at having won the fight and quickly grabbed Michonne’s sword off the wall. He ignored Jason’s unmoving body and made his way back outside, leaving the front door wide open as he headed for the meeting.

Carl had watched from the landing as Pete walked out. Only once he had left did Carl notice Jason’s body on the living room floor. He rushed down the stairs, calling Jason’s name but his older lover didn’t answer him. He knelt down beside Jason and shook him before lifting his head. When he did, he realised that Jason’s condition was more serious than he though. The warm, sticky feeling of blood filled his hand as the back of Jason’s head was bleeding. It had been cut when it struck the table, knocking him unconscious.

Carl shook Jason but he wouldn’t wake up. His body was limp and lifeless, the only signs he was still alive was his breathing and the consistent bleeding from the cut on the back of his head. Carl let out a shuddering breath as he tried to stop himself crying. He couldn’t let Jason die but he didn’t want to leave him either. He was torn and undecided.

“Carl?” Enid’s voice sounded from the doorway.

Carl met her eyes as she took in the sight. Carl crouched over an unconscious and bleeding Jason, tears rolling down his face.

“Get Rosita from the infirmary. Please!” Carl begged, his voice cracking.

Enid, though she didn’t care about Jason in the slightest, she did care for Carl. She nodded and ran towards the infirmary as fast as she could, leaving Carl to tend to his injured boyfriend. As Carl stared down at Jason’s motionless form, he silently begged Jason to be okay. He had a promise to keep.

_When they broke apart Jason gazed into Carl’s eyes and stroked his cheek. “I’ll never leave you, I promise.”_

“Don’t leave me.” Carl gasped out. He knew head injuries could be fatal.

 

 “I just wanna keep my family safe.” Tobin told them all, making his case without trying to play judge, jury or executioner. “I don’t even know what that means anymore but if it means that we’ve got to get rid of…of…”

Tobin trailed off as Rick appeared in the archway entrance of the courtyard. His face was streaked with blood and he was carrying a dead body. Everyone watched him with shocked expressions as he made his way into the centre of the courtyard before dumping the walker’s body on the floor in front of them. Many of the residents gasped and shrieked in horror. Rick felt relief at having the heavy weight off his shoulders.

“There wasn’t a guard on the gate.” Rick announced, breathing heavily. “It was open.”

Reg looked at his son, Spencer, in shock. Deanna glared at him angrily.

“I asked Gabriel to close it.” Spencer defended himself.

“Go!” Deanna commanded.

Spencer quickly did as his mother told him and headed back to the gate. He would double check for any other walkers in the community that Rick may have missed.

Rick walked towards the crowd of the meeting, walking around the rotting walker corpse that he had dumped in front of them. They all needed a reality check and the walkers getting into the community had been just the situation Rick had been looking for. This was how he could present his case convincingly.

“I didn’t bring it in. It got inside on its own.” Rick told them, turning to Deanna as blood continued to drip down his face. “They always will, the dead and the living because we’re in here.”

Rick glanced round at all the scared and confused faces. The only people who weren’t shocked by the walker, his appearance or his words were those of his own group. Abraham, Michonne, Carol and Eugene.

Rick thought about all the human threats they had faced. He recalled the two men in the bar near Hershel’s farm, Dave and Tony who had been part of a larger, more dangerous group and had tried to kill him for the farm. He recalled the Governor and his militia that had attacked the prison twice, succeeding in destroying it and slaughtering Hershel. He recalled the claimer group led by Joe that broke into the house they were staying in. He recalled Gareth and his hunters breaking into the church. The human threat was as endless as the undead army.

“And the ones out there, they’ll hunt us, they’ll find us. They’ll try to use us, they’ll try to kill us.” Rick told them, the fear growing amongst them. “But we’ll kill them. We’ll survive, I’ll show you how.”

Rick turned his attention back to Deanna who stood with her arms folded and a stunned expression on her face. They had been discussing whether or not they should exile Rick for being too dangerous yet here he was almost taking over the community with mere words and charisma. He was a natural born leader.

Rick thought about his vow to be honest with everyone. That included the residents of Alexandria. They may be weak and naïve but they deserved the truth as it was the only way they would learn. They were scared of him and he could tell. They had every reason to be.

“You know, I was thinking…I was thinking how many of you do I have to kill to save your lives?” Rick told them with a frustrated sigh.

The Alexandrians looked back at him in terror, finally noticing the Walther P22 handgun stuffed into the front of his belt. His friends watched him with stern faces, preparing themselves for the worst.

“But I’m not gonna do that. You’re gonna change.” Rick told them before turning back to Deanna. “I’m not sorry for what I said last night. I’m sorry for not saying it sooner.”

Deanna glared back at him. It was surprising to hear that Rick wasn’t sorry for his criticisms of them the night before while he had them at gunpoint. He had blamed them for the deaths that had happened, he had blamed them for pretty much everything that had went wrong since his people arrived. As Deanna considered what he was telling them all, she was beginning to realise that Rick was right.

“You’re not ready but you have to be. Right now you have to be.” Rick told her, pleading with her to become a better leader as he glanced at the walker corpse. “Luck runs out.”

Rick turned back to the crowd, preparing to relax them or even take any questions. He knew he had made his case as best he could and all he could do was hope that they understood him. As he stood there, he noticed Jessie shake her head in fear. Rick turned to the entrance of Deanna’s courtyard to find Pete standing there with Michonne’s sword in his hand.

“You’re not one of us.” Pete growled before shouting. “You’re not one of us!”

Reg rushed towards him, placing a hand on his shoulder to try and stop his advance. “Pete, you don’t wanna do this.”

“Get the hell away from me, Reg.” Pete warned him as he continued to approach Rick.

“Pete, stop.” Reg insisted, still remaining in the way.

“Get away from me, Reg.” Pete repeated, his anger growing. “Get away.”

As the crowd backed up in terror, feeling trapped in the garden, Rick reached down for his handgun. Pete didn’t intimidate him as the sword would not save him from a bullet.

“Not now.” Carol warned, as if reading his mind. They had to wait for the right moment.

“Pete, just stop!” Reg continued stubbornly.

“Get away, get away!” Pete bellowed and pushed Reg with both hands, the sword slicing into his neck and slitting his throat open.

The crowd screamed in horror as Reg fell back into Deanna’s arms, blood shooting out of his neck like a fountain as Abraham knocked Pete to the ground and pinned him down. Rick calmly watched as Deanna desperately tried to save her husband.

“No! No! Oh God no!” Deanna wailed as she tried in vain to stop the blood from pouring out of her husband’s neck. “No! My love!”

“Don’t listen to him! Don’t!” Pete shouted desperately as Abraham applied more pressure. “Listen to him!”

Rick turned away from Pete to watch Reginald die in Deanna’s arms, a pool of blood already forming around them. Reg continued to gasp for breath as he choked on his own blood, his body convulsing slightly as he quickly faded away.

“No, no, no! No my love!” Deanna continued to wail, tears running down her face. “No, my love! No, no, my love!”

Michonne watched in shock and horror. It damaged her to the core and made her feel overwhelmingly guilty to see such a nice man like Reg struck down with her weapon.

“It’s him!” Pete bellowed like a lunatic as Abraham pressed his face into the ground. “This is him!”

As the last drops of life left Reg’s body, Deanna looked up at Rick as everything he had been saying finally hit home. Had she dealt with Pete before their arrival then Reg would still be alive. Had she let Rick kill Pete during their fight then Reg would still be alive. Reg was now gone, the love of her life had been taken from her in seconds by the community’s violent drunk who had thrived on her compassion. That had to stop. Her soul mate’s death would not be in vain.

“Rick?” Deanna finally spoke, her voice uneven and weak from crying. “Do it.”

Rick nodded once and turned to Pete as Abraham moved out of the way. Without hesitation Rick pulled the trigger and shot Pete in the head, executing him instantly and putting an end to the years of abuse he had subjected his wife and children to. The crowd had screamed at the sound of the gunshot but it was clear that it had been necessary. Pete had been too dangerous to let live in the community, just as Rick had tried to tell them the night before.

“Rick?” A voice sounded from the archway.

Rick looked up from Pete’s lifeless body to find that Aaron and Daryl had returned from their run. Aaron’s eyes were wide with horror at what he just saw unfold and Daryl looked ready to pounce once given the command. His eyes narrowed as he realised who was standing between the two men. Morgan. The same man who had saved his life when he first woke up from his coma and who Rick believed had gone insane a year before. He was there. He was standing in front of him and appeared to be shocked and confused by what he had just witnessed.

 

**So there we have it. Chapter 24 is finally complete and is the longest chapter of the fanfiction so far. It also wraps up the Season 5 story arc as Season 6 now awaits us. A lot had to happen in this chapter and be explained. I’ve also dropped hints to and set up a couple of my own custom storylines.**

**Speaking of Season 6, it’s going to be explosive. I can just tell after that unique season premier. The stakes have never been higher.**

**I hope you have all enjoyed this chapter, as it took me a long time to finally get done and a lot of effort went into it. Please review and let me know what you liked/disliked about the chapter.**

**I’m not sure when the next chapter will be up because I need to see how things are going to pan out in Season 6, especially regarding Enid. I may need to break from the canon soon.**

**Since it’s the end of this arc, I’ll provide a list of Easter Eggs and references contained in chapters 15 – 24.**

**Easter Eggs:**

**Chapter 15: “Silly” is a reference to an ongoing joke within my own relationship.**

**Chapter 16: Dead couple in the cabin are a reference to Jake and Sherry from Resident Evil 6.**

**Chapter 17: Carlos is a reference to Carlos Olivera of Resident Evil 3.  
Phillip is the Governor. **

**Chapter 18: Brodie was the name of a family friend’s dog.  
Smash Bros Brawl was something I played with my own friends a lot at that age. **

**Chapter 19: Jason’s speech as teacher is lifted from my old History teacher.**

**Chapter 20: “Last time I leave you in charge” – references The Lost World: Jurassic Park.**  
**Colt Defender is the handgun from The Last Of Us.**  
**“Romero’s” is after George Romero.**  
**First song Jason sings is from Dead Rising 3.**  
**Jason shares my birthday.**  
**Street Fighter is another game I play a lot.**  
**“Silly Squishy” is what my BF calls me sometimes.**  
**Guns on table all appeared in the Resident Evil and Left 4 Dead series.**

 **Chapter 21 – Harry is based off Harry Styles, a requested reference from a friend of mine.**  
**Tony references the character of Bennet from Resident Evil: Afterlife and carries the same gun.**  
**The car used for Jason’s exile is the same one used by Umbrella in Resident Evil: Apocalypse.**

**Chapter 22 – The tiger cub, Logan, is named after my actual BF.  
Jason’s grandfather is based off my Grand Uncle.**

**Chapter 23 – The jail cell scene references the remake of The Crazies.**  
**Barry Burton is from Resident Evil.**  
**George Trevor and his family are also from Resident Evil.**

 **Chapter 24 – The Dragunov rifle appears in Resident Evil 5, Resident Evil 6 and Resident Evil: Revelations 2.**  
**Jason references Land Of The Dead “Zombies, man, they freak me out.”**  
**Henry is based off one of the most important and influential people in my personal life.**

**Again, thanks for all the votes/kudos/favourites/follows/subscriptions/bookmarks etc.**

**Thanks to the reviewers of chapter 23: The Sorrowful Deity, Darkscribe81, Dark.SKY27, Sarah_94, leylinjan, The_Man_Called_Madara, and kingcarlgrimes.**


	25. Half Way There

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Morgan has arrived in the community just as everyone is in shock from the meeting which left Reg and Pete dead. How will everyone cope with the changes and will Jason recover from his head injury?

The meeting had gone to Hell so fast that most of the residents were still in shock. They had been having a normal, civilised, human discussion on how to deal with a problem member of their community when said member had walked in carrying the corpse of one of the undead. He had shown them up by revealing that their negligence had allowed the creature to get inside their walls and almost their homes. Then the community’s raging, wife beating alcoholic had joined them with a katana that he had used to kill Reg, the man who built their walls and the husband of their leader. Drowning in devastated grief, Deanna had given the order to execute the raging alcoholic, Pete. Rick hadn’t hesitated when he pulled the trigger and killed the man instantly with a gunshot to the head.

It had been in that moment, when the meeting had fallen apart and two lives had been swiftly taken that Morgan, Rick’s old friend had appeared. He, along with Daryl and Aaron, were shocked at what they had returned to and needed things explained. Rick had left it up to the others to tell them what happened as he needed to talk to Morgan. He never thought he would see his friend again, especially after coming to Washington.

About half an hour after Pete’s execution, Rick and Daryl had taken Morgan back to their house. Aaron had stayed in the courtyard so he could get the full story from his boyfriend, Eric. Daryl and Morgan sat in the kitchen, both of them had bowls of food in their hands which they ate from quietly. Both men were starving after the long journey back to Alexandria. Daryl tossed the map Morgan had given him onto the table, it was the same map Abraham had given Rick. Rick glanced down at the map on the table. He picked it up and took a closer look, especially at the writing in the bottom corner that was the message written to him by Abraham.

SORRY I WAS AN ASSHOLE. COME TO WASHINGTON. THE NEW WORLD’S GONNA NEED RICK GRIMES.

Morgan smiled at him as he finished eating. Daryl sat on the opposite end of the table from him and was still hungrily shovelling food into his mouth. Rick was still covered in blood and his head was still pounding from the adrenaline caused by Reg’s death and shooting Pete.

“You were right.” Morgan commented. “It wasn’t over.”

Rick stared back at him suspiciously. Morgan saved his life when he first woke up from his coma and may have been a good man then but when they last met he was crazed. Rick still had the scar on his shoulder from where Morgan stabbed him when they last saw each other. It was strange to see him so calm and collected and Rick didn’t trust it. He glanced at Daryl before putting the map down.

“We should talk more tomorrow.” Rick told him, walking over. “Listen, I don’t take chances anymore.”

Morgan nodded in agreement. “Then you shouldn’t.”

Daryl watched the exchange. He didn’t feel it was justified to take precautions with a man who went out of his way to save both Aaron and him. Most people would have walked by and left them for dead but Morgan didn’t. It was clear that he was a good man, no matter how insane he may have previously been.

“We have an unfinished house just down the road.” Rick told his old friend. “We’ll keep you in there for the night.”

Morgan smiled warmly. “It’ll be nice to sleep in a house again.”

Rick watched him with narrow eyes. “I’ll come get you in the morning.”

Rick was about to walk out of the kitchen to clean the blood of his face when Morgan spoke up again.

“Rick.” Morgan called, stopping the man in his tracks. “Your boy. Is he still alive?”

Rick turned back to him and nodded. “Yeah, he’s asleep upstairs.”

Daryl put down his bowl on the kitchen table and got out of his chair. The two men watched the archer as he crossed the room towards the living room, his eyes focused down. Rick and Morgan’s eyes followed Daryl’s stare to the blood stains on the floor. Someone had been injured there. Daryl turned back around and stared at Rick, both men thinking the same thing.

“Carl?” Rick shouted up the stairs. “Jason?”

Silence. The three men shared a look before Rick pulled out his gun and made his way towards the staircase. He had to make sure his son was safe. Pete had taken Michonne’s katana which meant he had come into the house. The thought of Pete hurting or killing Carl infuriated Rick. The front door swinging open interrupted his rage filled thoughts as Carol stood in the doorway.

“Rick, you need to go to the infirmary.” Carol told him, her expression grim.

“Is Carl okay?” Rick asked as he quickly walked towards her.

“He’s fine.” Carol answered just as fast. “It’s Jason.”

Rick relaxed a little and nodded before handing Daryl a set of keys. “Daryl, take Morgan to the house. I’ll catch up.”

 

Rick’s boots thudded against the wooden floor of the infirmary’s porch as he walked along it and went through the door. The first thing he saw was Tara lying back on the main bed, her eyes finally open as she had woken up during the meeting. She smiled weakly as she saw him walk in and he returned that smile.

“Hey.” Rick rasped. “Welcome back.”

“Thanks.” Tara smiled, her voice weak. “You’re a mess.”

Rick smiled again. “Yeah…”

Rosita came through from the back room of the infirmary where there was another bed. When she spotted Rick she immediately knew why he was there and gestured to the back room. Rick nodded to her gratefully and made his way past the bed and into the back room of the infirmary.

Carl sat on a wooden chair next to the other bed. He hadn’t heard Rick approach as he was too focused on Jason. The older teen lay on the bed unconscious with a large bandage wrapped around his head that displaced his hair. His chest was rising and falling normally but by Carl’s body language Rick knew something serious had happened. Carl whipped his head round when one of the floorboards creaked under Rick’s weight.

“Dad…” Carl gasped out with a wobbly voice.

The teen got out of the chair and rushed towards his father, wrapping his arms around him tightly. He didn’t care about the blood that covered Rick’s clothes because all he needed in that moment was the comfort of his father’s arms. Rick instinctively wrapped his arms around his son’s smaller form and held him there, feeling the boy shake a little as he wrestled with his emotions.

“What happened?” Rick asked, gently rubbing Carl’s back.

Carl pulled away from the embrace and looked up at his father with puffy red eyes. “Pete. He and Jason had a fight, he hit his head and he won’t wake up.”

“Jason’s pretty tough.” Rick tried to reassure his son. “He’ll be fine.”

“What if he’s not?” Carl asked, his grief forcing him to only consider the worst. “What if he...?”

“He won’t.” Rick told him. “Tara woke up, so will he.”

“I don’t wanna lose him, dad.” Carl pleaded, almost as if Rick could control death itself. “I love him.”

Rick pulled Carl into another hug. “I know.”

Carl knew his father was doing his best to reassure him but the reality of the situation was clear to Carl. Jason had sustained a nasty injury to the back of his head and if he didn’t wake up there was a chance he never would. Carl had already lost so many people close to him, he couldn’t face losing the closest person to him. A soft yet dark voice in the back of his head reminded him that he would inevitably lose everyone in that world, just as his father had warned him about in the past.

_“People are gonna die. I’m gonna die. Mum. There’s no way you can ever be ready for it.”_

_“You are not safe. No matter how many people are around or how clear the area looks. No matter what anyone says, no matter what you think. You are not safe. It only takes one second. One second and it’s over. Never let your guard down. Ever.”_

 

Abraham entered the cemetery, carrying Reg’s body, which was covered in plastic tarp, over his shoulder. He stopped where the grave would be dug and dropped the body down onto the ground. Sticking out of the plastic was Reg’s hand, the wedding ring still on his finger. Abraham gazed down at it. He had lost his wife and children so he knew the pain Deanna was feeling. The world was cruel. Reg was the last man who deserved to die. Abraham took a swig from his whiskey bottle before pouring a little of it onto Reg’s body, his way of showing respect.

 

Deanna remained in her courtyard where she had collapsed when Reg had been killed. His body had since been moved so it could be buried later. She sat on her side, her hands still dripping with blood and adding to the pool of it that covered the ground in front of her. She looked up as Gabriel walked into the courtyard, taking in the aftermath of the meeting.

She remembered his warning, she remembered all the awful things he had said about Rick’s group that had made her doubt them. In the end, they had been right. They knew what the world was and what had to be done to keep the community safe and she hadn’t listened. Her ignorance had caused her to lose Reginald, her soulmate and life-long lover. This was one wound that would never close.

“You were wrong.” She told him, her voice hoarse from all the crying she had done.

Gabriel silently and solemnly nodded. He had been very wrong.

 

Rick made his way down the street towards the townhouse that acted as Alexandria’s holding cell. He caught Daryl walking up the stairs and onto the street, the keys still in his hand. Rick nodded to him upon his approach. There was a solemn silence in the air and the night was cold.

“We don’t need to do this.” Daryl told him, handing over the keys.

“I don’t want any more surprises tonight.” Rick countered sternly.

“Whose blood was it?” Daryl asked, referring to their living room floor.

Rick sighed. “Jason. He fought with Pete and lost. He’s in the infirmary, unconscious.”

“He gonna be okay?” Daryl inquired, knowing the danger involved with someone dying inside the walls.

“Should be.” Rick answered. “Get some sleep, we’ll talk in the morning.”

Daryl nodded and walked past Rick towards the house they shared. Rick looked at the keys to the holding cell in his hand and thought about what Daryl had said. Morgan did seem drastically different and he had saved Daryl and Aaron. Rick headed down the small flight of stairs and opened the cell door. As expected, Morgan was still awake.

“Just wanted to ask you something.” Rick stated as he walked in.

Morgan smiled calmly. “Then ask.”

“How’d you wind up meeting Aaron and Daryl?” Rick asked, tilting his head a little.

“They were trapped. I saved them.” Morgan answered simply.

“Saved them from what?” Rick inquired. Daryl had already told him privately but he wanted to be sure.

_Daryl and Aaron walked between two of the large trailers parked up near the entrance of Del Arno foods. Before the apocalypse it had been a store of canned foods and offered a delivery service for supermarkets with its trucks. They made their way up a small ramp so they could get to the doors of the trailers. The area was deathly silent with no signs of life or recent activity._

_“Whoa!” Aaron exclaimed excitedly as he bent down by one of the trailers. “I wasn’t sure I’d ever see one of these!”_

_Aaron opened his bag and reached down to pull off the number plate from the trailer. He was trying to collect all the American states and he had yet to find one from Alaska until now._

_“Hey, listen, I don’t like giving up either but the guy is in a red poncho. Can see him from a mile away.” Aaron commented as he struggled with the number plate. “We’ve gone a lot of miles here and no sign of him. But if we come away with a trailer full of cans, I’d say that’s a good trip.”_

_Daryl nodded in agreement as they reached down to open the first of the food trailers. Daryl opened the latch and lifted the door. There was the loud snap of a mechanism as the strings and cans around them vibrated, unlocking all the latches and pulling all the doors up. Daryl and Aaron reeled back as the trailer revealed itself to be filled with walkers, some of which were hanging on hooks._

_The men tried to run to the right but all the trailer doors had opened to reveal more walkers. The snarling corpses stumbled out of the trailers and followed the men back between two of the trailers. When Daryl and Aaron reached the other side they discovered that the doors at both ends had been opened leaving the car park full of walking corpses as well._

_Daryl stabbed the closest walker with his knife while Aaron slammed the number plate into the head of another. He dropped the number plate and ran with Daryl back between the trailers before they both crawled underneath one of them. They discovered legless walkers were already under there, slowly crawling towards them. Daryl grabbed a large chain and led Aaron back out the opposite side of the trailer._

_Three walkers stumbled towards Daryl in a line so he whipped the steel chain at them and managed to obliterate all of their skulls with the one whip. He picked up his crossbow just as Aaron struggled with a walker that had grabbed him. Daryl grabbed the walker and stabbed it in the head, saving Aaron who pulled out his machete and hacked away at another two walkers as the two of them ran._

_The two men rushed through the herd, keeping themselves ducking low and using shoulder barges to prevent being grabbed by any of the rotting corpses. They ran towards an abandoned car and managed to get the doors open so they could dive inside. Aaron tried to slam the door shut behind him but a walker had already reached in so he crushed its skull with the door before finally closing it. Both Daryl and Aaron panted heavily as they watched all the walkers converge on the car, banging and biting at the glass windows._

_“The glass will hold for a while, yeah?” Aaron asked optimistically._

_Daryl looked around at all the hungry corpses, each one with a W carved into their foreheads. “Maybe. Maybe we can make it so they can’t see us. Then in a couple hours something’ll come by and they’ll follow it out. There’s gotta be something in here we can use to block the view.”_

_The two men searched around for something they could use to cover all the windows. However, all Aaron could find was a short note written on a crumpled up piece of paper._

_TRAP. BAD PEOPLE COMING. DON’T STAY._

_They shared a fearful look as they realised they didn’t have a lot of time. The whole thing was a carefully constructed trap and if they didn’t find a way out of it then they would be killed. Their options were limited as the walkers continued to pound on the glass from all directions around the car. As he thought about their situation, Daryl couldn’t help but chuckle to himself._

_“What?” Aaron asked him, confused by how he could find amusement in their situation._

_“I came out here cause I felt all closed up back there.” Daryl explained, referring to Alexandria. “Even now, this still feels more like me than back in those houses. Pretty messed up, huh?”_

_Aaron smiled. “You were trying.”_

_“I had to.” Daryl replied, watching as the walkers continued to pound on the glass._

_“No, you didn’t.” Aaron countered. “Look, when I saw you out there with your group on the road and you went off on your own by the barn. When the storm hit, you led your people to safety.”_

_Daryl stared ahead at the walkers as he listened to Aaron._

_“That was it. I knew I had to bring you people back.” Aaron finished, annoyed at himself. “You were right, we should have kept looking for that guy in the poncho. I shouldn’t have given up, you didn’t.”_

_Daryl thought for a moment. Aaron was right about that much, Daryl never gave up. He would fight until his dying breath. They were trapped in the car but they could still get out, even if it meant sacrificing himself. He pulled out a cigarette and stuck it in his mouth before lighting it up._

_“I’ll go.” He announced, much to Aaron’s surprise. “I’ll lead them out, you make a break for the fence.”_

_Aaron shook his head. “No, no, no. This was my fault.”_

_“It wasn’t a question and this ain’t your decision.” Daryl spat back. “Ain’t nobody’s fault. Just let me finish my smoke first.”_

_“No. No, you don’t draw them away.” Aaron retorted. “We fight. We go for the fence. We do it together. Whether we make it or not, we do it together. We have to.”_

_Daryl considered it for a moment but quickly realised he wasn’t going to convince Aaron otherwise. He took another draw from his cigarette before nodding._

_“Alright.” He agreed, stubbing out the cigarette. “Ready?”_

_“Yeah.” Aaron replied, grabbing his machete while Daryl grabbed his knife._

_“We go on three.” Daryl told him, grabbing the door handle. “One…Two…”_

_Suddenly one of the walkers on Aaron’s side sprayed blood over the glass as something was shoved through its skull and out its eye. The door opened and Aaron got out as a black man with a long wooden staff defended him from the walkers. Morgan used his staff to hit the walkers and shove them back while Aaron killed some with his machete. Behind them, Daryl got out of the car and used his knife to stab any that got too close as they all ran for the fence._

_The three men managed to fight their way to the fence and swing it shut behind them. Daryl aimed his crossbow and fired at a walker that was coming up behind Morgan, striking it in the forehead and killing it. All three of them paused to catch their breath, especially Aaron, who was still shaking from the adrenaline. The walkers continued to snarl and growl as they pounded against the chain link fence._

_“That was…that was…thank you.” Aaron gasped out gratefully._

_Morgan nodded as he wiped his staff clean with a cloth._

_“I’m Aaron, this is Daryl.” Aaron introduced them._

_“Morgan.” Morgan introduced himself with a smile._

_“Why?” Daryl asked. A stranger risking their life for another was extremely rare._

_“Why?” Morgan repeated with a smile. “Because all life is precious, Daryl.”_

_“Whoever set that trip, they’re coming but I have good news, we, uh, we do.” Aaron stuttered to correct himself. “We have a community not too far from here, walls, electricity, it’s safe. If you’d like to come join us…”_

_“I thank you but I’m on my way somewhere.” Morgan replied. “Fact is, I’m lost so if you could tell me where we are…”_

_Morgan pulled a folded up map out of his pocket and handed it to Daryl. The archer unfolded the map and noticed a path was drawn on it leading from Terminus to Washington DC. The map was old with dirt and blood splatters on it. In the corner of the map a message was written in bold pen._

_SORRY I WAS AN ASSHOLE. COME TO WASHINGTON. THE NEW WORLD IS GONNA NEED RICK GRIMES._

_Daryl stared at Morgan with narrowed eyes. “You know Rick?”_

_Morgan stared back in surprise. “Yeah. You a friend of his?”_

Rick nodded. It was the same story Daryl had told him so he was starting to trust his old friend a little more. The detail about all the walkers having a W carved into their foreheads and all of them being employed in a trap was troubling. The walker bodies on hooks reminded him of Noah’s community where people had been mutilated by an attacking group.

“This W thing.” Rick continued. “Know anything about it?”

Morgan nodded. He had already met the group responsible.

_Morgan sat in the woods in front of a small fire he had built. He tore open a small satchel and poured the contents into a cup. He added the water he had boiled with the fire and waited for it to cool. It was a simple cup of soup that would give him enough energy to get through most of the day._

_A twig snapped in front of him as a man entered the clearing with him. He was dressed all in black with long black hair that draped either side of his face. On his forehead he had a W shaped scar. He aimed a SIG-Sauer P226 handgun at Morgan as he sat down on a large rock opposite him._

_“Looks good.” The man commented as Morgan looked around for others. “Hi.”_

_“Hello.” Morgan replied after finding no sign of more men. “You can lower that.”_

_The man continued to stare at him but didn’t lower his gun. Morgan sighed as he put down the small spoon he had been stirring his soup with._

_“What’s the W for?” Morgan asked the creepy man._

_“You know, the first settlers here, they put bounties on wolves’ heads, brought the natives into it, made them hunt them.” The man explained with a sinister smirk and pointed to his forehead. “Didn’t take them too long to kill them all. They’re back now. Thoughts?”_

_Morgan smiled back as he looked around, constantly double checking for approaching danger. He didn’t believe the man in front of him, the self-proclaimed wolf, was alone. He was far too confident to be alone._

_Morgan turned back to the man. “Everything gets a return.”_

_The wolf narrowed his eyes in suspicion. “Are you shitting me?”_

_“No, I shit you not.” Morgan responded as they both shared a laugh._

_“I like this. Just talking. I don’t get to meet new people very often.” The wolf admitted. “Maybe once every two weeks.”_

_“That’s a lot.” Morgan remarked, having encountered extremely few people on his journey._

_“Well, I work at it. Well, we do.” The wolf continued. “Sometimes we find camps, we run through them… We have traps too, it’s different, it’s not like meeting like this.”_

_Morgan turned his head as he heard movement in the bushes behind him. He now knew there was at least one other person in the area._

_“As equals. Little chats in front of the fire with a stranger. That’s the closest thing to movies now.” The wolf continued, his tone turning slightly sinister. “I miss the movies, I used to…put that down.”_

_Morgan stared at him over the cup he had just started to drink from. “Why?”_

_“Because I want it.” The wolf replied darkly. “I want everything you have. Every last drop.”_

_“Can I keep a little of it, just to get me through a day or two?” Morgan questioned, trying to negotiate. “You know, just to keep me alive?”_

_The wolf’s lips curved into a sinister smirk. “I’m taking you too and you’re not exactly going to be alive.”_

_Morgan shrugged and put the cup down as he glared at the man. He would have to fight his way out of the situation because talking wasn’t going to work._

_“Some of the tribes around here, they thought the first people were wolves transformed into men.” The wolf continued his psychotic lecture. “And now, well, you know, everything gets a return, right?”_

_Morgan nodded as he glared. “You can have my supplies, you can have everything, doesn’t need to be any ugliness. But I can’t allow you to take me away. I will not allow that.”_

_Morgan reached for his staff but the wolf cocked his gun._

_“Don’t move.” The creepy man warned. “Just be still. Just be still.”_

_A loud rustling came from behind Morgan, prompting him to stand up and grab his staff. A second man erupted from the bushes behind him and slammed a sickle down onto the log with a grunt of effort. Morgan knocked the first wolf onto his back with his wooden staff before ducking a swing from the second blonde haired man. He smacked the second wolf in the back with his staff, knocking him off balance. The two men stood up as Morgan stood where he was, ready to strike again._

_“You should just go.” He warned them. “Now!”_

_“No.” The blonde haired wolf rasped and charged him again._

_The man swung his sickle at Morgan’s head but the black man side stepped him and blocked the next strike with his staff. Morgan smacked the wolf’s hand with his staff, then his forearm twice before striking him on the head to knock him to the floor. The first wolf rushed him with a large blade but again Morgan deflected it with his staff and hooked him in the face with his gloved fist. Morgan stood in place again as the men got up again, both of them bleeding at this point._

_“Just go.” Morgan told them again. “Please.”_

_“Now!” The black haired wolf shouted._

_The two men rushed at Morgan from opposite sides. Morgan swung his staff and clubbed the blonde wolf in the head, knocking him unconscious. He quickly spun around and deflected the blade with his staff before striking the first man in the head as well, knocking him unconscious too. Morgan picked up the SIG-Sauer P226 just as a walker stumbled into the clearing. He pulled the trigger but the gun simply clicked loudly. It was empty. Morgan crushed the walker’s skull with his staff and cleaned the blood off with a cloth._

Rick didn’t like the sound of the men. They were clearly deranged and extremely dangerous. They would need better security in the community because the last thing they needed was for these men to attack them. Rick knew, however, that with the combined skills of his group these wolves wouldn’t stand much of a chance.

 

Carl groaned as his eyes fluttered open. He had fallen asleep by Jason’s bedside and looked up at the teen, hoping to find him awake but his heart quickly sank with disappointment. Jason was still unconscious and unnervingly still. A tap on his shoulder got his attention as he found it had been Rosita who had woken him.

“Why don’t you go home and get some sleep?” Rosita asked him. “I’ll keep an eye on Jason and if he wakes up I’ll come round and wake you.”

Carl sighed, he didn’t want to leave but he was very tired. “Promise?”

“I promise.” Rosita answered with a smile.

Carl nodded and stood up, looking at Jason one last time before leaving the room and the infirmary itself. Carl heard the infirmary door close behind him as he walked along the wooden porch and onto the street. The air was cold and uncomfortable, matching his own feelings as he walked away from his comatose boyfriend.

Carl stuffed his hands into his pockets as he walked. The community was quiet as a lot had happened. He knew someone had died because of the blood covering his father but he never inquired about who the blood belonged to. It didn’t matter to him when Jason was still unconscious from his head injury. He couldn’t lose his boyfriend, he couldn’t even imagine losing him. Carl, for a long time, had felt very alone in the apocalyptic world but Jason had taken that loneliness away. He needed Jason to survive.

A glimmer of light and a metallic clicking sound brought him out of his thoughts. Someone was playing with a lighter on top of the pergola. As Carl walked closer to the pergola he recognised the long hair and backpack of the person, it was Enid. He needed someone to talk to and he hoped she would understand what he was going through. Carl climbed up onto the roof of the wooden pergola that sat near the lake of Alexandria. Enid didn’t react to his presence, she just continued sitting there, flicking her lighter open and closed. He walked over and sat beside her. Enid flicked her lighter closed and placed her hand on his hand.

“How is he?” Enid asked, keeping her voice low.

Carl closed his eyes and sighed. “Still unconscious. Rosita bandaged his head.”

“Does she think he’ll make it?” She asked, flicking the lighter back open.

Carl nodded before pausing for a moment. “What if he doesn’t?”

“Then he doesn’t.” Enid replied bluntly.

Carl squeezed his eyes shut again as he failed to contain his tears. For the first time in a very long time he felt fear. He was afraid that they had just experienced their last night together. He was afraid they would never have another conversation. He was afraid he would never hear Jason’s laugh again. He was afraid they would never make love again.

“He means a lot to you, doesn’t he?” Enid asked, watching him as he cried.

Carl nodded his head quickly, his tears flying out in different directions from the movement.

“It’s better to be alone now.” Enid commented, staring off into the distance. “Caring always leads to pain.”

“Better than being numb all the time.” Carl countered in between sobs.

“Is it?” Enid asked rhetorically. She didn’t believe it for a moment.

Carl knew he wouldn’t convince her in that moment and he didn’t have the energy for it. He just kept crying and after a few moments, Enid pulled his head to the side to rest it on her shoulder as one of her arms wrapped around him. She knew the least she could do for him was give him some form of comfort in his time of need.

Unknown to either of them, Ron was watching them from the shadows. This display of affection between them along with how close they were getting angered him. First Rick killed his father and now Carl was trying to steal his girl…

 

In the infirmary, Rosita helped Tara to sit up. When she had woken up during the meeting it had filled Rosita with joy and was a glimmer of hope in the darkness of the world. Her friend was going to live to see another day.

“Thanks.” Tara said softly, grateful for the assistance.

“Of course.” Rosita replied with a smile that Tara returned.

Rosita helped Tara to pull up the covers around her a little more. It was slightly cold in the infirmary and Tara could feel that cold attack her sleeveless arms. She winced in pain as she moved her head. Suddenly, the door flung open as Glenn and Nicholas plodded in together, holding onto each other for support. They were both dirty, bleeding and gasping for breath.

Rosita rushed over to them as Glenn helped Nicholas onto one of the beds. “Glenn, Glenn?”

“We’re okay.” Glenn nodded in between breaths, the blood rolling down his face contradicting his answer.

“You guys look like shit.” Tara commented with a smirk.

Glenn and Nicholas froze for a moment, smiles creeping onto their faces as they realised that she was awake and alive. Glenn took a few painful steps forward, shocked to see that she was going to recover fine.

“She’s okay, she’s fine.” Rosita assured him.

Maggie stepped into the infirmary, still shocked from the meeting. Her eyes widened when she saw Tara sitting up in bed.

“Tara?” She exclaimed in surprise.

“I’m okay.” Tara replied with a breath and a gentle nod. “You should check on them.”

Maggie rushed over to her husband, immediately concerned for his health and safety when she saw the state he was in. She couldn’t even think of a reason why he was in such bad shape as it looked like he had been in a fight.

“I’m okay…we were out there…the walkers and the…we’re alright.” Glenn stuttered out between breaths as Maggie stroked his hair before finding his bullet wound. “I got winged by a ricochet. It’s alright.”

Beside them on the other bed, Nicholas was smiling as he realised Glenn was lying for him. He knew Glenn had every reason to expose what he had done and have him exiled but he was choosing not to. His appreciation and respect for Glenn skyrocketed.

Loud footsteps on the wooden porch outside signalled the arrival of Eugene. He stepped into the doorway and froze in amazement when he realised Tara was awake. His best friend who he had fought walkers for the first time to save was alive. His efforts had been worth it.

“Holy shit…” Eugene exclaimed, his voice trembling.

Tara watched as he walked up to her, his lip quivering as he was on the verge of tears. “Thank God nothing happened to your hair.”

Tara smiled at her own joke as Eugene continued to stare back at her, a huge grin plastered on his face. His constant staring was a little unnerving as she had no idea what he had went through to get her home safe.

“Okay, Eugene is freaking me out.” Tara commented with a smirk. “Someone want to send Noah in here to protect me?”

She turned to them, expecting smiles, laughter or even Noah himself to walk in. Instead she was met with a morbid silence and grim faces. Her heart sank when she realised what it meant.

 

Michonne walked across the living room after entering the house. She held her sword in one hand while the other was used to wipe the blade clean with a cloth. She placed it back on the wall where she had mounted it before and froze. That was how Pete had gained access to the sword. That was why Jason now lay unconscious in the infirmary and Reg now lay in a body bag. A good man like Reg had been slayed with her weapon.

Michonne in that moment made a decision. She couldn’t allow anyone to use her sword but her. That was twice now that someone had used her weapon to kill someone she cared about. She would not let it happen ever again. Michonne lifted the sword off the mount and placed it back inside its scabbard before strapping the scabbard to her back again.

 

_It was early morning in Alexandria with the sun beaming over the sleepy community casting long shadows across the ground. The birds were awake and chirping loudly as they went about their morning routine. Carl walked along the wooden porch to the infirmary. He hadn’t slept and he desperately needed to see Jason._

_When he opened the door of the infirmary, he froze. There was a stomach curdling stench in the air that made him cough and cover his mouth. He squeezed his eyes shut as they watered from the foul smell before opening them slowly. On the bed in the front room was the remains of Tara, her chest cavity had been ripped open and partially devoured along with her neck. The bed sheets that had originally been white were now a violent crimson._

_Carl’s heartrate accelerated as he realised there was a walker in the infirmary. He would have grieved for Tara but his focus was on making sure Jason was okay. Every passing second was making Carl fear the worst. He rushed through to the backroom and felt his legs turn to lead when he reached the doorway._

_Rosita’s corpse lay sprawled out on the floor, her knife discarded near her hand. She lay on her front with her shirt soaked in blood as a walker gorged itself on the flesh of her back. Carl whimpered when he saw the walker, causing it to look up at him with its dead, yellow eyes. The black shirt now soaked with blood, the jeans, the hair and the unmistakable bandage round the head confirmed its identity. Jason had died over night and had turned, feasting on Tara before catching Rosita by surprise._

_Jason’s reanimated corpse stood up to its full height and snarled at Carl as it started to stumble towards him. Carl’s legs trembled beneath him but refused to move as he watched his deceased boyfriend approach him. Tears streamed down his face as his whole body shook with grief. He wanted to cry out for help but he couldn’t find his voice._

_“No…no…please…” Carl sobbed out as the walker got closer and closer._

_Carl was paralysed with grief as the undead Jason staggered over to him. He barely reacted when Jason’s cold, stiff hands grabbed his shoulders and pushed him onto his back with a loud crash. Carl sobbed as he tried to hold Jason’s hungry corpse above him to avoid being bitten but he no longer had energy in his arms. He had lost his will to fight. He looked up at the pale, dead face of his boyfriend and sobbed harder. The night before had been their last night together. They would never have another conversation. He would never hear Jason’s laugh again. They would never make love again._

_Carl felt the last of his strength leave him as he let his arms fall loose. The undead Jason dropped down towards him and sank its teeth into the side of his neck, the same place the living Jason had bitten sexually so many times before. Carl wailed in agony as the walker ripped into his flesh, blood spurting everywhere as his final moments were at hand. His death wouldn’t be slow and the most painful part of it all was the excruciating heartbreak._

_He heard voices calling on him, his father, he assumed, was coming to the rescue but it would be too late. The voices grew louder as if they were right beside him, they must have come into the infirmary and discovered the grizzly scene. Carl’s body shook as they attempted to remove the walker from on top of him. Shouting and shaking. Shaking and shouting._

“Carl!” A voice called loudly in his ear. “Carl! Wake up!”

Carl’s eyes shot open as he grabbed onto the hand on his shoulder. He squeezed the person’s arm hard as he looked up, expecting to see Jason’s undead face like in his nightmare. Instead he was met with Michonne’s look of concern. She had woken him after hearing him crying in his sleep.

“You were having a nightmare.” She told him soothingly, stroking his hair out of his face.

Carl’s breathing calmed down as he came back to reality. Jason wasn’t dead. Yet. He had to be sure, he couldn’t wait another second without knowing for certain that his boyfriend hadn’t turned into a walker overnight like in his dream. Carl couldn’t shake the feeling that his nightmare had been an omen. As he swung his legs to get out of bed he realised he was still fully dressed. He must have cried himself to sleep.

“I’m okay.” He mumbled to Michonne so that she would relax. “I need to see Jason.”

“Carl, it’s six thirty in the morning.” Michonne told him as he slipped his feet into his boots.

“I need to see Jason.” Carl repeated as he tied his laces. He wasn’t going to wait.

 

Daryl was crouched down beside his motorcycle engine as he tweaked a couple things. He wanted to make sure his bike was always in perfect condition as the last thing he would want would be for the engine to breakdown. Behind him, Rick exited the house and walked down the wooden stairs of the porch and onto the street.

“So, was he okay with it?” Daryl asked, referring to Morgan being locked up.

“Pretty much his idea. He gets it.” Rick answered, walking round to the opposite side of the bike.

“By the by, it’s still a cage, you know?” Daryl commented.

“He gets it.” Rick replied. “He told me what happened out there with the trucks.”

“Tell you about those guys he met?” Daryl asked, standing up and touching his forehead. “With the W?”

“Like that walker we saw, yeah.” Rick nodded. “We need more watch points and I’m gonna tell Deanna we don’t need to go out looking for people anymore.”

Daryl’s heart sank a little at that statement. The only part of Alexandria he had felt comfortable in was being a recruiter as it meant he got to be out in the world. He hated being walled up inside a supposedly civilised society, the very kind of society that rejected him before the world ended.

“You feel different about it?” Rick asked, noticing his silence.

“Yeah, I do.” Daryl answered with a nod.

“The people out there? They gotta take care of themselves just like us.” Rick responded. “I’m gonna get him out. Shouldn’t leave him in there any longer than we have to.”

Daryl watched as Rick walked away. He remained silent. He was loyal to Rick but he felt it in his heart that Rick was wrong about looking for people. They needed people. They needed good people to help protect them from the bad people.

 

The creek of the floorboard caught Michonne’s attention as she spotted Rick in the backroom’s doorway. He stepped into the room where Jason remained unconscious in the bed, Carl by his side holding his hand. Carl hadn’t even noticed Rick enter, or if he had he didn’t acknowledge him in any way. He was too focused on being by Jason’s side. He wanted to be there when the older teen woke up.

“How is he?” Rick rasped to Michonne as he continued to stare at Carl and Jason.

“He’s distraught. I had to wake him from a nightmare.” Michonne answered, earning a look from Rick who hadn’t expected her to talk about Carl. “And Jason’s stable for now. No change.”

Rick nodded silently. Michonne stood up and offered him the seat next to Carl, which he took with a smile of gratitude. Michonne leaned against the wall and folded her arms as she watched Rick sit down next to his son. The former sheriff placed one hand on Jason’s unconscious form and the other on his son’s back, offering a little bit of fatherly comfort.

Rick could feel how tense Carl’s whole body was just by his back. It was rigid and Carl was surprisingly still. He knew the kinds of thoughts that were going through his son’s mind and he knew none of them were healthy. Rick closed his eyes for a moment, frustrated at the knowledge that the only thing that would make Carl better was if Jason woke up.

“It’s like when you were shot.” Carl finally rasped out, his throat sore.

“Then you should speak to him.” Rick told his son. “I heard some things when I was in the coma, so maybe he can too.”

“Is it worth it?” Carl rasped again, not shifting his gaze.

Rick took a breath and sighed. “Yeah.”

“Okay.” Carl mumbled. He was hesitant to say anything in front of his father and Michonne.

“Jason, we need you to be okay. You’re family.” Rick spoke, sensing Carl’s hesitation. “So we need you to wake up.”

“Jason, you’re the best thing to ever happen to me. Please come back.” Carl pleaded lowly, keeping his head close to Jason’s. “I love you.”

Rick stood up and decided to let Carl stay with Jason a little longer. He took a few steps towards Michonne as they both watched Carl continue to mutter things to Jason’s motionless form. They were both hoping the older teen would pull through and wake up sooner rather than later.

“I’m gonna go get Morgan.” Rick rasped, finally looking away from Carl. “If you need anything…”

“I’ll find you.” Michonne cut him off with a soft smile. “I know.”

“Thanks for staying with him.” Rick appreciated her connection with Carl.

With a nod between them, Rick headed back out of the room while Michonne sat back down next to Carl. She would stay with him as long as she needed to.

 

Rick unlocked the door to the unfinished townhouse that served as Alexandria’s holding cell. It was the same townhouse he had been locked in after his fight with Pete and was the only safe place he could have thought of putting Morgan. He opened the door and slowly stepped inside, hearing movement from the room. Rick turned and found Morgan swinging his wooden staff in the middle of the room. He swung it professionally and with precision, making it a deadly defensive and offensive weapon.

Once Morgan finished his practice routine, Rick spoke up. “Where’d you learn that?”

“From a friend.” Morgan answered, placing the tip of the staff on the ground as he held onto it.

“Before or after?” Rick asked before echoing some of Morgan’s first words to him. “I ask, you answer. It’s common courtesy, right?”

Morgan smiled, remembering how he first met Rick. His young son had hit Rick in the face with a shovel as he sat in their street. Rick had just woken up in the hospital and was still in a hospital gown, completely disorientated and confused. Morgan had tied him to a bed in his house and questioned whether he had been bitten or scratched by a walker. It was hard to believe that the same scared man was now standing in front of him as a hardened leader.

“It was after.” Morgan finally answered. “After everything.”

“Look, I’m sorry for this, for having to do this.” Rick apologised. It didn’t feel fair locking away a man he knew he could trust.

“It’s alright.” Morgan replied. “The way I look at it, sometimes it’s safer when there’s no way out.”

Rick was silent. It was a good point and he was relieved that Morgan understood the necessary precautions he had taken.

“Got to get to know each other again.” Morgan added with a smile. “For the first time. Again.”

Rick smiled back. A lot had changed and they had a lot to talk about.

Rick and Morgan walked up the main street of Alexandria. It was the first time that Morgan was able to get a good look at the community as he had arrived the night before. There was a lot he needed to learn about the history of the place and the people there. As a result, Rick had elected himself to be the tour guide of the community so he could bring his old friend up to speed with what was going on.

“Who put up the wall?” Morgan asked as they walked.

“They did. It was a man, Reg. He drew up plans, made it happen early on.” Rick explained. “A lot of people in here, they’ve been inside from the start. They had food, energy, not a whole lot of walkers.”

Morgan looked around them as they continued further up the street.

“They just lived. They haven’t had to survive. They figured that out, brought us in.” Rick continued. “Still might be too late.”

“Too late how?” Morgan questioned, observing the wall.

“For them to come around. We’ll see.” Rick answered. “You’ll have to talk to Deanna, she’s the woman in charge. She was married to Reg.”

“Was?” Morgan questioned cynically.

Rick was about to explain what happened at the meeting when movement caught his eye. Between the conifers lining the cemetery he spotted Gabriel with a shovel. Tobin was the one digging Reg’s grave so it confused him as to why Gabriel would be there in the first place. Rick marched over to find out what was happening with Morgan directly behind him.

“What’re you doing?” Rick questioned sternly, interrupting their digging.

“We’re uh…I wanted to help.” Gabriel answered timidly, still intimidated by Rick.

“We only need one.” Rick told Tobin, angered at two graves being dug.

“We have two men here.” Tobin replied, out of breath from the digging.

“We’re not going to bury killers inside these walls.” Rick countered, referring to Pete.

 “Look, I understand how you feel, I do.” Tobin retorted sincerely. “But it’s not your decision.”

“Tobin, Rick’s right.” Deanna interrupted, entering the cemetery slowly.

She walked up to the four men and stood in the middle of the cemetery where the two body bags lay. One of them was her late husband, Reg and the other was Pete. She glared at Pete’s body, rage and a lust for vengeance still coursing through her though it would never be satisfied.

“Take it away. Go west down Braton road a few miles, just past the bridge. We don’t go out that way.” Deanna told them, still glaring at the body. “Let the trees have him.”

With that said, she walked away from the men. Their agreement was said in silence as they watched her leave the cemetery. Rick and Morgan picked up Pete’s body and started carrying it out of the cemetery towards one of the nearby parked cars. Unknown to everyone there was that Ron had been watching and listening to everything, growing more upset with every word.

Rick and Morgan sighed from exertion once they finally dropped Pete’s large and heavy body into the trunk of the car. They looked down at the body as they got their breath back. Morgan knew it was the same man he had witness Rick shoot in the head the night before.

“I shot him because he killed Reg.” Rick told him, knowing Morgan hadn’t understood the previous night. “That was it, we didn’t have a choice.”

Morgan wasn’t convinced. “You do have a cell.”

Rick shook his head, glaring at the body. “Not for killers.”

“I’m a killer, Rick.” Morgan countered, turning to him. “I am and you are too.”

Rick glanced at him before closing the trunk. Morgan had obviously changed and when he had killed he was crazed. Rick only ever killed to defend his family, it wasn’t the same as what Pete had done. Not by a long shot.

 

A loud grumble sounded from Carl’s abdomen. He hadn’t eaten since the day before and didn’t have an appetite. All he needed was for Jason to wake up and tell him that he was okay. That was all he wanted and all he silently asked for. His nightmare continued to replay in his mind. If Jason died then it had to be him who would stop him from turning. It had to be.

Carl couldn’t shake the feeling that his nightmare was an omen. Even if Jason did wake up, he was going to die. He knew he was being ridiculous and that there was no way he had received some kind of psychic foreshadowing but it didn’t stop the panic in him. Carl was scared to lose Jason yet he knew he eventually would. He could feel it deep inside of him and it caused his heart to ache strongly.

“Carl, we should head back and eat something.” Michonne suggested softly, rubbing his back.

“I’m not hungry.” Carl lied, not looking at her.

“Yes, you are.” Michonne retorted knowingly. “Nothing’s going to happen to him in the next half hour.”

“I don’t want to eat.” Carl argued weakly, low on energy from not having eaten or slept much.

“Too bad.” Michonne barked with a motherly tone.

Michonne grabbed his arm and pulled him up from the chair. Carl initially tried to fight back but he didn’t have the strength to do so nor did he want to fight with Michonne. He let out a loud sigh of frustration and walked out of the room with her, glancing back at Jason in the hope that he would wake up in that moment but he never did.

 

_Jason, Kellin, Harry, Sam and Ryan all sat in a rough circle in the middle of Jason’s living room floor. Jason’s parents had gone out to celebrate their anniversary and had promised not to be back until the next day, giving permission to Jason to have a sleepover so long as he didn’t burn the house down._

_Most of the day had been spent out in town. They had been to the cinema and had been shopping for new clothes and games. Jason had bought new black leather fingerless gloves as his old pair had become worn. Kellin had decided to splash out on a new pair of skinny jeans which he had opted to get changed into once they got to Jason’s house. Ryan had bought new boots for when they were on stage. Sam had purchased an amusing T-shirt that he liked that references the videogame Portal. Harry had also bought a new dark green beanie._

_After the rest of the afternoon having been spent in Jason’s house playing some of the wide selection of videogames that Jason owned, they had decided to calm down for the night. The clock on top of the fireplace ticked away as the hands reached one thirty in the morning. The group of friends sat in a circle as they had decided to play a game of truth or dare._

_“Alright, Ryan-kun.” Jason announced, referring to his friend’s love of anime. “Truth or dare?”_

_“I trust you about as far as I can throw you.” Ryan commented with a laugh. “So, I’ll take truth.”_

_“Boring, but fine.” Jason remarked with a sigh. “I’ve always been curious, who’d you lose your virginity to?”_

_Ryan groaned as he watched Jason rock on the spot in anticipation. “Kelcie from the Cathouse.”_

_“Which Kelcie is that again?” Jason asked as he knew a couple girls by that name._

_“The one that slapped you.” Ryan answered with a smirk._

_“Oh, yeah!” Jason exclaimed. “Wow, I would never have guessed…”_

_“Anyway! My turn, thank you very much.” Ryan exclaimed and picked his victim. “Sam, truth or dare?”_

_“Truth.” Sam answered with a yawn._

_“Last person you had a sexual encounter with?” Ryan quizzed with a cheeky grin._

_Sam raised his right hand in an open fist. “Jill.”_

_The group laughed as they all understood exactly what he meant. They had never seen Sam with any girl nor had he ever expressed interest. Jason remembered asking if he was gay once but Sam had calmly explained that he’s not very interested in anyone generally._

_“Kellin, truth or dare?” Sam asked as he lay on his back on the floor._

_“Truth.” Kellin answered timidly. He wasn’t confident enough for any dares._

_“Who’d you lose it to?” Sam asked, too bored with the game to invent a different question._

_Kellin blushed, though it was hard to see in the low light. “I haven’t, actually.”_

_“Oh for fuck’s sake.” Ryan remarked with a groan. “He’s the only innocent one here.”_

_“That’ll change.” Harry commented with his iconic deep voice._

_“Jason.” Kellin chose his prey. “Truth or dare?”_

_“Truth.” Jason answered immediately, smirking._

_“Are you interesting in anyone right now?” Kellin asked somewhat hesitantly._

_Jason hesitated, stuttering a moment while he thought about his answer. “Yeah…yeah I am.”_

_Kellin mentally cursed himself for asking. His worst fears had been realised. Jason was already interested in someone._

_“Hazza!” Jason elected. “Truth or dare?”_

_“Dare.” Harry answered with a dangerous smirk._

_“Brave!” Jason remarked with a smirk of his own. “I dare you to kiss one of us.”_

_Jason grinned in victory. Harry was brave and adventurous but he doubted the happy-go-lucky teen would be willing to do something like that. His grin fell from his face as Harry shifted across the floor before grabbing either side of Jason’s face, pulling him into a kiss. Jason’s eyes widened in shock as Harry planted his lips firmly upon his own before quickly breaking apart with a victorious grin._

_Kellin pulled his gaze to the floor. Even if they were in a dark room at night he didn’t want to risk anyone seeing the expression on his face. He had just learned that Jason was interested in someone and he hated the idea of it being Harry. He may not have confessed his feelings to Jason yet but he didn’t want the British boy stealing any chance he had with Jason._

_“…turn, Kellin.”_

_A nudge and the last two words of a sentence brought Kellin out of his thoughts. He turned to find Jason with his hand on his shoulder and a concerned look on his face._

_“You okay?” Jason asked sincerely._

_“Yeah, sorry.” Kellin answered in embarrassment. “I was miles away.”_

_“Well, it’s your turn because Sam has fallen asleep on us.” Ryan told him with a grin of amusement._

_“Oh, okay.” Kellin stuttered before concentrating. “Jason, truth or dare?”_

_“Dare.” Jason challenged with a cheeky grin. He wanted to see how creative Kellin was._

_“I dare you to take your shirt off and keep it off until the end of the game.” Kellin stated with a daring smirk._

_Jason shrugged and pulled off his t-shirt, revealing his slim and slightly toned body. He noticed that this revelation had Kellin blushing at the sight. He smirked. Two could play at that game._

_“Kellin, truth or dare.” Jason challenged with a smile._

_“Dare.” Kellin replied bravely. He was hoping for something special, excitement clouding his judgement._

_“I dare you to do the same.” Jason stated with an excited smirk._

_Kellin blushed fiercely but didn’t back down. He noticed that Ryan and Harry had since fallen asleep and decided to go through with the dare. He pulled off his long sleeved shirt and averted his gaze, embarrassed by Jason’s tense stare. Jason bit his lip as he took in the slim form of Kellin’s body. It was definitely the body of a dancer._

_“I have an ugly body, sorry.” Kellin commented, staring at the floor._

_“I disagree.” Jason countered, slightly nervous._

_“You’re just saying that.” Kellin retorted, rubbing the scars that lined his arms._

_Jason grabbed Kellin’s hand and rubbed his thumb over a couple of the scars on Kellin’s arm. He had been self-harming with a blade for many years judging from the number of scars that formed the frightening pattern over his skin._

_“These don’t make your body ugly. They show all the times you chose to live.” Jason commented, still rubbing the scars gently. “Where does the pain come from?”_

_Kellin hesitated. He had never really told anyone about his problems. “My mum died two years ago. I found her dying on the floor and couldn’t save her.”_

_“I’m so sorry…” Jason gasped, shocked at the revelation. “But I’m sure you tried your best to save her.”_

_“It wasn’t enough though.” Kellin spat back. “Nothing I do ever is.”_

_“Hey, that’s not true.” Jason countered, rubbing Kellin’s back. “Besides, I’m sure she doesn’t blame you and just wants you to live and be happy.”_

_“How can I be?” Kellin retorted, tears threatening to fall. “I lie to my family and my boyfriend doesn’t care about my problems.”_

_Jason instinctively wrapped his arms around Kellin and pulled the younger boy into a warm hug. He didn’t care that they were both shirtless, though he would be lying if he said it didn’t excite him a little. The focus was on how Kellin was feeling so Jason pushed away any sexual thoughts._

_“I care. I care a lot and I want you to know you can talk to me about them any time.” Jason told him, rubbing his back as they hugged. “I’ll do anything I can to help you, I promise.”_

_“Thanks.” Kellin replied as he sniffed loudly to hold back his tears._

_They broke apart the hug and stared into each other’s eyes for a few moments. Jason could see the pain that resided inside Kellin’s eyes, inside his soul and Kellin could do the same with Jason. They both had their dark secrets, their pain. They were silently making a promise to be there for one another. Neither of them were conscious of it but they had both started leaning closer, their eyes slowly falling shut as they prepared to kiss away their shared pain._

_An abrupt and loud snore from Sam caused both boys to jump. They were brought crashing back to reality. They weren’t alone and Kellin was in a relationship. Jason licked his lips and let go of Kellin’s body, scooting over to put his t-shirt back on. Kellin reluctantly did the same with his own shirt, feeling very embarrassed and disappointed._

_“We should sleep.” Jason commented, trying to act casual. “It’s late.”_

_Kellin sighed with disappointment and nodded. He made his way over to one of the many mattresses that had been laid out for them. Kellin lay on his side and folded his arms, his back to Jason as he tried his best to hide his disappointment. He jumped when a pair of arms slowly wrapped around him from behind and a warm body pressed against his back._

_“Is this okay?” Jason whispered in his ear. “You look like you need cuddles.”_

_“It’s perfect.” Kellin murmured as his eyes fell shut._

 

Jason groaned as he finally became aware of his surroundings. He opened his eyes but quickly shut them when harsh light attacked them. His head was pounding and he was totally disorientated. He took a breath and tried to feel out his surroundings before opening his eyes again. It was quiet and he was in a soft bed. He was struggling to remember why. When he heard footsteps, he placed his hand over his eyes to block out the light.

“Kellin?” Jason muttered as he tried to see the person through the harsh light.

After a moment his eyes adjusted and he lowered his hand. He was in the infirmary and Rosita was standing over him.

“Oh, yeah…” Jason trailed off and closed his eyes, rubbing his forehead as his heart sank.

“How are you feeling?” Rosita asked, checking his eyes as she shined a light into them.

“Like a duck that just stepped on a landmine.” Jason remarked with a groan.

Rosita couldn’t help but smile at the ridiculous analogy. “What’s the last thing you remember?”

“I was on a plane, I think.” Jason remarked innocently, pondering to himself.

Rosita frowned. “Do you remember your name?”

“Haven’t a clue what my name is.” Jason replied with a shrug, wincing at the pain in his head. “But you’re Chris, right?”

Rosita frowned. He was saying it all with a straight face and an even tone, so she didn’t think he was lying. Memory loss was a common consequence of a head injury along with general confusion. Suddenly Jason started chuckling to himself as he stared at Rosita.

“Oh, Rosita, your face was priceless.” Jason remarked with a grin. “I’m just fucking with you.”

“That’s not funny.” Rosita scolded him.

“It is a little.” Jason retorted before sighing. “I’m Jason and the last thing I remember was my fight with Pete.”

“Do you remember what knocked you out?” Rosita asked him. “You’ve got a nasty cut on the back of your head.”

Jason winced as he touched the bandaged cut with his hand. “Yeah, I lost my balance. Must have hit the corner of the table. Remind me to shoot Pete when I get out of here.”

Rosita sighed, she hated explaining bad news. “Rick beat you to it.”

Jason sat up a little, reading the expression on her face. “What happened?”

“Pete took Michonne’s sword to the meeting.” Rosita explained. “He killed Reg and then Rick shot him.”

“Christ…” Jason muttered as he rubbed his forehead. He had missed a lot.

“You should rest.” Rosita told him. “Carl wanted to be here when you woke up, I’ll go get him.”

Jason grabbed her wrist to stop her leaving. “Don’t bother. I’ll surprise him by going home.”

“Jason, you don’t even know if you can stand up yet.” Rosita warned, not wanting him to hurt himself.

“Well, I’ll know soon enough.” Jason remarked with a smile.

 

Rick and Morgan got out of the sedan and opened the trunk. Together, they lifted Pete’s body out and carried him into a patch of woodland on the side of the road next to a fallen tree. Without a word, they returned to the car where Morgan retrieved two shovels and made his way back towards the body. Rick followed him as he considered the effort involved in digging the grave and if it was worth doing so for a man like Pete.

“Morgan, maybe we just leave him here?” Rick suggested.

Morgan smiled and tapped the ground with his shovel. “That’s not who you are. I know.”

Morgan turned and walked over to the body, ready to begin digging as Rick took a few quick steps to close the distance between them again.

“Hey.” Rick retorted, shaking his head. “You don’t.”

Morgan nodded silently. He did know who Rick was and he knew that Rick didn’t want to be that person anymore. He understood the heavy toll on his conscience and his heart that the apocalypse was bearing on his friend. However, he knew that the Rick Grimes he met for the first time was the same man who was there with him in those woods.

Morgan dropped his satchel bag and staff on the ground before he started to dig. He didn’t look at Rick as he fought with the forest floor to get a good start on the long, deep grave that Pete’s body required. Rick watched him dig, unsurprised by Morgan’s stubbornness as it was a trait he had seen in him since the beginning. As Rick relaxed, he could hear the faint but unmistakable sound of walkers rasping and snarling. He looked around as he knew they weren’t too far away but they didn’t sound like they were getting closer. He glanced at Morgan who appeared to be oblivious to the sound.

“Morgan.” Rick tried to get his attention. “Morgan!”

Rick scowled and walked up to the man, grabbing his arm to stop him digging. When Morgan glared at him, he glared back intensely.

“Stop.” Rick told him, turning his head in the direction of the sound. “Do you hear that?”

Morgan dropped the shovel. He heard it now. He picked up his staff and walked with Rick as they followed the sound. They needed to find the source because of how loud it was and how many walkers it could be. If it was a herd then they would need to get back into the car quickly.

After five minutes of walking they came across the edge of a cliff. Beyond the cliff stretched out the vast expanse of an old quarry that was hundreds of meters in diameter and very deep. The two roads that served as entrances and exits to the quarry were barricaded off with two large eighteen wheeler trucks each. The bottom of the quarry was completely filled with walkers, there had to be around twenty thousand corpses meandering around in the bottom of the quarry.

Behind them, a twig snapped suddenly and alerted the two men. They could hear someone running followed by the sounds of approaching walkers. Through the bushes they could see Ron fall on his front before scrambling back to his feet to continue running. Rick ran to cut him off, knowing the boy wasn’t aware of the cliff edge ahead of him.

As Ron burst out of the treeline, Rick tackled him to the floor as three of the walkers continued to stumble over the edge and to their deaths. A fourth walker approached Rick and Ron but the experienced leader pulled out his Colt Python and shot it in the head. He aimed at the fifth and final walker but stopped when Morgan smacked its chin and head with his staff, knocking it over the edge.

Rick stood up and holstered his revolver. He looked down at Ron who lay on the ground, glaring up at him. He didn’t look the least bit grateful for having been saved by the same man who killed his father. He eventually stood up and stepped forward until he was standing alongside Rick and Morgan, looking into the quarry for the first time to see what had caught the men’s interest.

“What are you doing out here, Ron?” Rick asked, still slightly out of breath from the sudden rush to action.

“I wanted to know where my dad was buried.” Ron answered lowly.

Rick glanced back at him, surprised the boy cared that much about his abusive father. Morgan pulled out a pair of binoculars from his satchel and took a closer look at the quarry. The bottom was completely filled with corpses and their numbers continued to increase as the slope on the west side allowed the walkers to get in but not get out.

“This is how.” Rick commented, finally understanding how lucky the people of Alexandria were.

“How what?” Morgan asked, not quite following.

“How the community’s still here.” Rick explained. “They’ve had walkers at their walls but some of them, maybe most of them, they wound up here.”

Morgan took another look through his binoculars and discovered that some of the walkers were able to squeeze out through the narrow gap between the trucks closest to them. It appeared to be one at a time and not very often, but the blood stains on the ground showed that it was a very tight squeeze for them.

Rick glanced over to where Ron had been standing only to find that he was gone. He turned all the way round behind him to spot the teenager walking away from the two men and back into the woods.

“Ron.” Rick called after him. “Ron!”

“I’m going back.” Ron replied monotonously. “Fine.”

“Hey, you shouldn’t be out here.” Rick told him, grabbing hold of him to make him stop.

Ron pulled his arm out of Rick’s grip. “I don’t care what you think.”

“It’s not what I think, it’s what I _know_. You can’t protect yourself, I’ll show you but right now you have no idea what you’re doing.” Rick told him, unaware of Jason’s classes. “If you come out here, you’re gonna die and it won’t be quick and it won’t ever be over because you’ll be one of them. That’s what’s gonna happen.”

Ron glared back at him. He didn’t care about any of it, he wouldn’t take advice from the man who had killed his father or anyone who was friends with him. He could run away from walkers perfectly fine, he didn’t need to know what to do because that’s all he needed to do.

“You’re coming back with us.” Rick continued, raising his pointing finger. “Don’t make it hard.”

Ron glared as Rick started to lead the way. He wanted nothing more than to push the man off the cliff. He trailed behind the two men and spent most of the time staring at the ground. He didn’t want to even look at them if he didn’t have to. Once Rick reached Pete’s body he stopped. He wanted to walk past but he knew that it would give Ron the wrong idea of who he was.

Rick understood that Ron was struggling with his father’s death. His world was falling apart around him and he was lashing out with Rick square in the crosshairs. Leaving Pete’s body out in the open would remove any hope of an understanding between them and would show Rick to be a much colder person than he actually was. With a sigh and a rub of his forehead, he turned and picked up the shovel.

Ron watched in surprise as Rick started digging the grave for his father. He didn’t ask for help nor did he say anything. He simply started digging and wasn’t going to stop until Pete was properly buried. Morgan saw Ron’s reaction and looked back at Rick, smiling. He had been right. He did know Rick. Morgan dropped his staff and satchel and started to help.

 

Carl sat back on the bed he usually shared with Jason. He had propped up the pillows against the headboard so he could sit upright while still leaning back slightly, his legs spread out straight in front of him. He had a book in his hands that he was trying desperately to read but he couldn’t concentrate on any more than a couple words at a time. Jason’s wellbeing was the only thing on his mind.

The sound of footsteps approaching the bedroom door caught his attention. He looked over the top of his book as the bedroom door slowly opened. Carl dropped the book when he saw that it was Jason standing in the doorway, a knowing smile plastered on his face. The younger teen swung out of bed and rushed towards the older teen, throwing his arms around him and pulling him into a tight hug.

Jason couldn’t help but grin as he wrapped his arms around Carl’s slightly smaller form. He could feel the younger’s body shake as he fought the tears of relief and joy that were trickling down his face and onto Jason’s black shirt. Jason rubbed his back and kissed his forehead as they continued to embrace. He was glad to be back in Carl’s arms despite the dull throb in the back of his head.

“I’m okay, I’m fine.” Jason cooed as they separated. “I promised I’d never leave you and I meant it.”

Carl nodded rapidly before closing the distance between them, attacking Jason’s mouth with his own in a fierce kiss. Jason let out a moan of surprise before he got to work with kissing back, his tongue teasing his boyfriend’s as they let themselves indulge in each other. Carl had been hoping that Jason would wake up since the moment he lost consciousness and could hardly contain his relief and excitement at having the older teen awake again.

Jason kicked the door shut behind him and restarted their passionate lip lock as he guided Carl over to the bed. He pulled off his black shirt before lying down on his side next to Carl, pulling the smaller teen’s body against his own as their tongues continued to dance. Jason knew that Carl needed a release of all the pent up fear and emotion and he was giving him that release in full.

“I was scared you weren’t going to wake up.” Carl confessed when they broke apart for a moment.

Jason smiled and stroked Carl’s cheek. “It’s gonna take more than a coffee table to kill me.”

They both shared a gentle laugh at Jason’s remark, both of them relieved that it was true. They fell silent and lay together on the bed, gazing into each other’s eyes as one of Carl’s fingers traced over Jason’s chest and toned abdomen. There was a content and gentle atmosphere to their intimate exchange as Jason played with the younger’s hair, smiling the whole time as Carl smiled back.

“As much as I’d love to just lie here the rest of the day.” Jason commented with a smile. “I should probably get a shower, pretty sure I’ve still got blood in my hair.”

Carl smiled back mischievously as Jason got out of the bed. “Maybe I should join you.”

Jason turned to look back at the grinning boy. “I think you should.”

 

After their extended shower, Jason and Carl had gone downstairs to find out that Rick had returned from Pete’s burial. He was intent on organising a meeting in Deanna’s apartment that everyone had to go to. Carl was tasked with staying behind to look after Judith but Jason promised his boyfriend that he would explain everything to him upon his return.

After half an hour of going door to door in the community, the meeting had been arranged. An hour later, over forty people had gathered in Deanna’s front room for the meeting that Rick had urgently called. Among them were Aaron, Eric, Daryl, Abraham, Rosita, Sasha, Maggie, Glenn, Carol, Nicholas, Tobin, Gabriel, Eugene, Jessie, Michonne, Morgan and Jason. Deanna was also present, standing by the window with her back turned to the meeting though she was listening intently.

“A few miles west of here, down Braton road, there’s an old quarry and it’s full of walkers.” Rick announced to the shocked faces. “There are thousands of them in there, blocked in by some trucks but there’s a chance they could get free.”

Rick knew that they couldn’t leave the walkers there unattended as time, movement and rain had done damage to the ground near one of the exits. There was also the possibility of someone or something moving the trucks and using the walker herd as a weapon much like the Governor had done at the prison.

“So we need to make sure that doesn’t happen. Walkers herd up and we can use that to our advantage.” Rick explained. “The plan is to lead them out of the quarry and take them twenty miles west from here. That should be enough to stop them coming here.”

“How?” A voice called from the back of the room.

“We open up one of the exits and have Daryl lead them with his motorcycle. The sound will draw them.” Rick answered. “The rest of us will be controlling the herd, making sure they stay on track and don’t get distracted.”

“How did they get there in the first place?” Jason questioned, speaking up. “Why would someone trap walkers in a quarry like that?”

“I know.” A voice to his left responded.

One of the newest faces to the group, though not to the community was Heath, an African American man with thick black glasses and black dreadlocks tied up in a ponytail. He was a supply runner for Alexandria and his team had been out when Rick’s group arrived, having only just returned that day.

“My team, we saw it early on. Back when we were going on one of those first scouts. Finding out what was around here.” Heath explained. “There was a camp at the bottom. The people there must have blocked the exits with those trucks back when everything started to go bad. They didn’t make it. They were all roamers, maybe a dozen of them.”

“No one has been back since?” Maggie questioned.

“DC. Every time we’re out scavenging they’re all in the other direction.” Heath answered with a shake of his head. “And I never really felt like having a picnic next to the camp that ate itself.”

“So, all the while the walkers have been drawn by the sound.” Michonne commented, deducing the creation of the herd. “They’re making more sound and they’re drawing more in.”

Rick nodded. “And here we are.”

He looked around the room to make sure everyone was focused on him. Rick had a plan for how to deal with the situation but he knew there would be doubt among the residents of the community. He also expected some resistance from his own group.

“Now, what I’m proposing, I know it sounds risky but walkers are already slipping through the exits.” Rick explained. “One of the trucks holding the walkers in could go over the edge any day now, maybe after one more hard rain. That exit sends them East. All of them. Right at us.”

Most of the people in the room looked visibly worried. A lot of them would be terrified of one walker let alone thousands of them at the same time.

“This isn’t about if it gives, it’s when. It’s gonna happen.” Rick continued. “That’s why we have to do this soon.”

“This is…I don’t think I have another word for it, this is terrifying. All of it.” Carol commented, continuing to play possum. “But it doesn’t sound like there’s any other way.”

“Maybe there is.” Carter, a man standing beside Carol, spoke up. “Couldn’t we just build up the weak spots? I can draw up plans, I worked on the wall with Reg. Construction crew. We can try and make it safe.”

“Even if we could, the sound of those walkers is drawing more and more and more every day.” Rick countered, shaking his head. “Building up the exits won’t change that.”

“We’re gonna do what Rick says.” Deanna spoke up. “The plan he has laid out.”

Rick nodded, glad that he had Deanna’s trust and support.

“I told you all we’re gonna have Daryl leading them away.” Rick began to go over the plan again.

“Me too. I’ll take a car, ride next to him. It can’t just be him” Sasha spoke up. “. I’ll keep them coming, Daryl keeps them from getting sloppy.”

“I’ll go with her.” Abraham added. “It’s a long way to white knuckle it solo.”

Rick nodded. “We’ll have two teams, one at each side of the forest helping to manage this thing. We’re gonna have a few people on watch from now on, Rosita, Spencer and Holly. So they’re out. So who’s in?”

“Me.” Michonne spoke up, annoyed at the sudden silence in the room.

“This has got to be the most insane plan I’ve heard of since the world ended.” Jason commented, also annoyed by the silence. “You can count on me. I’m in.”

Rick shook his head. “No, you’re still recovering and I need people here I can trust to handle things.”

“You also need people you can trust out there.” Jason argued. “I can handle walkers.”

“No.” Rick repeated, louder this time.

Glenn and Maggie were sitting on the couch in the middle of the room. Maggie’s gaze was fixed on Deanna, who had become much more stoic since Reg’s death, which was hardly a surprise. However, Maggie knew that if Deanna didn’t get her emotions back under control then the community would suffer without her leadership.

“You should keep an eye on her.” Glenn whispered to his wife. “Keep going with the plan she talked about.”

“I know but this is important.” Maggie whispered back.

“She’s important.” Glenn stressed. “People are scared. They need to see her come back.”

“That’s not the only reason.” Maggie replied with a soft smile.

“Yeah, it isn’t.” Glenn admitted.

“Okay.” Maggie finally agreed.

Glenn looked up at Rick. “I’m in.”

“Can’t we just shoot them all?” Bob Miller questioned from the back of the room.

“As extensive as our armoury is I’m pretty sure we don’t have enough bullets.” Jason replied quickly. “Besides, the sound would just draw more walkers our way.”

Gabriel thought hard for a moment before speaking up. “I’d like to help as well.”

“No.” Rick answered instantly. He was still angry over what Gabriel had said. “Who else? We need more.”

“Couldn’t we burn them?” Spencer suggested, finding the herding plan to be risky.

“It would be a waste of fuel and if they got out somehow they could set the whole forest ablaze.” Jason replied with a shake of his head.

“Aren’t our walls protection enough?” Bruce questioned. He had helped build them.

“Against a couple hundred walkers, sure.” Jason replied. “But several thousand are a force of nature. They’d bring the walls down.”

“There’s gotta be another play.” Carter insisted. “We can’t just control that many.”

“I said it before, walkers herd up, they’ll follow a path if something’s drawing them and that’s how we can get them all at once.” Rick explained.

“So, so what? We’re supposed to just take your word for it?” Carter challenged. “We’re all supposed to just fall in line behind you after…”

Rick narrowed his eyes. “After what?”

“After you wave a gun around, screaming, pointing it at people.” Carter continued aggressively. “After you shoot a man in the face, after you…”

“Enough!” Deanna barked, spinning round.

Silence fell on the crowd. It was rare to hear Deanna angry or lose her usual composure.

“He’s been out there. He’s faced it. So we are going to trust him.” Deanna told the crowd before glaring directly at Carter. “All of us.”

Silence fell again as Carter lost his nerve under the intense glares of Deanna and Rick.

“I’ll do it.” Heath spoke up to break the tension.

“Me too.” Francine, one of the construction crew, piped up.

“Whatever you need.” Tobin spoke up from beside Rick. “I’m in.”

“Now, who else?” Deanna asked.

Nicholas wavered about offering to help. He wanted to but he knew Glenn had told him that wasn’t going to be permitted. Glenn may not have told everyone what he did but that came at the price of not going outside the walls anymore. Nicholas stared at Glenn as the Asian man scowled at him, shaking his head slowly as a warning. The curly haired man knew that the walker threat was too big to ignore.

“I’ll go.” Nicholas offered, raising his hand much to Glenn’s surprise. “We have to do this. I need to help.”

Rick saw the look on Glenn’s face. He didn’t know that Nicholas had tried to kill the man but he knew they had fought over Noah’s death.

“You sure you can handle it?” Rick asked, giving Nicholas the option to back down.

Nicholas shrugged, he wasn’t sure but he didn’t have a choice. “You need people.”

Rick nodded. They didn’t have the time or the numbers to be picky over who helped and who didn’t. He looked at all the concerned faces in the room. They needed a morale boost.

“We’re gonna make this work.” Rick told them. “We’ll keep this place safe, keep our families safe. We will.”

“The plan.” Carter spoke again. “Go through it again.”

“Man, he just said it.” Daryl growled from the windowsill.

“Every part. Again.” Carter stressed stubbornly. “The exact plan.”

 

Carl was sitting on the couch with Judith when Jason returned home with Carol. The teen immediately made his way over and sat with Carl, wrapping an arm around him to hold him close. He pulled a couple funny faces at Judith so she knew she was being acknowledged by the older teen.

“So, what happened?” Carl asked as he bounced Judith on his lap.

“Your dad found a quarry full of walkers a few miles away. There’s thousands of the undead bastards.” Jason explained. “He’s laid out a plan to open the exit and lead all of them twenty miles west.”

“That won’t be easy.” Carl commented.

“No, it won’t be.” Jason replied with a sigh. “But it is possible and can be done.”

Carl sighed, his gaze falling to the floor. “And you’ll be out there helping, won’t you?”

“No. Your dad wants me to watch over things here.” Jason answered and kissed Carl’s cheek.

Carol came over and picked Judith up. “I’m going to take her for a walk. We need to know how people feel about Rick’s plan.”

The two teens nodded in agreement.

“That Carter guy is absolutely terrified.” Jason remarked. “Guy probably trembles at the sight of one walker let alone several thousand.”

“He won’t make it.” Carol commented grimly as she placed Judith into her pram.

“Can’t say I’d miss him.” Jason replied as he rubbed his eyes.

As Carol headed outside, Carl turned to Jason as an idea struck him. He knew Jason hadn’t eaten since he woke up as he had been to the meeting. He must have been hungry.

“Do you want something to eat?” Carl asked his boyfriend.

Jason raised his eyebrows at the question. “Yeah, I am quite hungry now that you mention it.”

Carl stood up. “Then I’ll make you something.”

“Carl, I can make it myself.” Jason countered, holding Carl’s hand.

Carl smiled. “You’re injured, so I’ll make it. Head upstairs and we’ll sit in our usual spot.”

Jason sighed before smiling, knowing he wouldn’t win this argument. “Okay, I’m going.”

 

Rick, Deanna, Heath, Morgan, Michonne and Carter stood outside on Deanna’s porch. They stood round a table where Rick had placed a map of the area. He slammed his fingers down on the intersecting point between two roads.

“Marshall and Redding. We force them west here.” Rick told them.

“How?” Deanna questioned.

“We block it off so they can only go one way.” Rick answered. “West, away from the community.”

“Block it off with what?” Carter asked curiously.

“Cars. We’ll use the RV, some of the bigger trucks, park them end to end.” Rick answered.

“We’ll be drawing them away, they’re gonna keep moving.” Michonne added to assure Deanna.

“That many? Just bouncing off some sedans?” Carter questioned in distrust. “And then when they start slipping through and the ones walking away start distracting the rest and you stop drawing them away.”

Rick didn’t answer right away. Carter did have a point and it wasn’t an easy one to find a solution for.

“Man’s gotta point.” Heath added. It wasn’t something that could be left to chance.

“We got plates, the big ass metal ones from the construction site.” Eugene told them, joining them. “We could use them to fortify the whip wall, it’ll help disperse the force of impact and direct the walkers clean. Like a pool table, eight ball, corner pocket.”

“That’s an army out there and what happens when this doesn’t hold and they push on through?” Carter argued, pointing to the map. “The curve in this hillside is gonna send them east, right back here. You seriously wanna risk that?”

 “No.” Rick replied, frustrated by Carter’s consistent lack of faith. “So you need to help us to make it hold.”

“These walls, you build them.” Morgan added. “So, you’ve already done the impossible.”

Carter was silent. He didn’t trust the plan at all and didn’t have faith in any blockade they built. Jason had said in the meeting that a large herd was a force of nature that nothing could stop and those words were constantly ringing in his mind.

“Carter.” Deanna pleaded. “Please.”

 

Jason and Carl lay in bed together. Outside it was dark, cold and quiet as night had finally fallen upon them yet again. In the morning construction of the corner wall would begin and Rick had agreed to allow Jason to help with it. They cuddled close to one another under the covers, sharing a few gentle kisses. Carl was glad to have Jason back in bed beside him, the one night he had spent without him had been a lonely one.

“I was so scared.” Carl confessed, more into Jason’s chest than to his face. “I can’t lose you. Not you.”

Jason stroked Carl’s hair and pulled him close. “You won’t.”

They both knew it was a strong possibility that he would. No one lived forever and people died frequently in the apocalyptic world. With the threat of thousands of walkers only a couple miles away, the chances of one of them dying were high. Jason knew inside himself that he would die before Carl because he wasn’t going to let anything happen to his lover. If he had to die so that Carl could live then that decision was already made and set in stone.

“I might.” Carl countered grimly. “You know that.”

Jason kissed Carl gently before pulling away to answer. “We all have our time to go but I’ll be holding mine off as long as possible, I promise.”

“Stay safe tomorrow.” Carl warned him. “Rosita says you shouldn’t be doing any hard work yet.”

Jason smiled at his concern. “I know but I need to help. I’ll take regular breaks.”

“Did you hear my dad talking about the wolves?” Carl asked, sneaking a kiss in before Jason could answer.

The older teen nodded. “Yeah, but I wouldn’t worry. They’re at least fifty miles away.”

“What if they find this place?” Carl asked, his eyelids getting heavier.

Jason kissed Carl’s nose and stroked his cheek. “I doubt they will but if they do, we’ll kill them all.”

Carl smiled at Jason’s confidence and snuggled himself closer to the older teen as they both slowly drifted off to sleep.

 

_Jason ran through the woods as he tried his best to escape the horde. The car that he and Tony had used to get to the warehouse wasn’t far away and the other man’s death would serve as a useful distraction. Though he was conflicted morally for having left him behind, he was relieved that he wouldn’t need to worry about the man trying to rape Kellin._

_In his heart he knew he should have pulled the trigger when he had got back from the run and discovered what was going on. That had been the perfect opportunity to show everyone what happened to those who tried to hurt his boyfriend. Unfortunately, Henry and Carlos had enforced a strict policy of never killing within the group. Kellin would have also been greatly upset with him had he pulled the trigger._

_Jason was that busy running that he almost didn’t notice the walker that stumbled out from behind a tree ahead of him. He slowed himself down and pulled out his knife before stabbing the walking corpse in the forehead. He struggled to remove his knife as it had become lodged in the bone of the skull, pulling Jason to the floor as the corpse fell to the ground. A loud rasp signalled the approach of another hungry cadaver so Jason pulled out his Beretta and shot the monster in the head, ending its existence._

_He reached down to focus on pulling his knife out of the walker’s forehead when a thick boot struck him in the face. Jason rolled onto his back on the ground, clutching his nose as it bled onto the palm of his hand. Instinctively, he raised his gun but it was slapped out of his hand seconds before a Beretta Cougar was aimed at his forehead. Jason stared up at his assailant._

_His attacker was a woman with short black hair. She wore thick brown boots, dark olive cargos held up with a studded belt that had a gun belt and knife sheath strapped to the thighs and a dark brown leather jacket. She scowled down at Jason with intense dark brown eyes as she kept her gun aimed at the teen’s forehead._

_“And who the fuck are you?” Jason spat as his nose continued to bleed, some of the blood spilling into his mouth._

_“Helen.” The woman answered with a sinister smirk. “Not that it matters anymore. None of us are who we were.”_

_“Well, Helen.” Jason began, stressing her name. “There’s a herd coming this way. So whatever you’re gonna do you better do it fast.”_

_Helen’s sinister smirk never fell from her face as she listened to his warning. She tilted her head before pistol whipping Jason in the temple, knocking him unconscious._

 

Carl awoke to the sound of heavy breathing and reached his arm out to Jason’s side of the bed while his eyes were still closed. He couldn’t feel Jason in the bed as his hand constantly touched the soft sheets on the mattress, so he finally opened his eyes. When he sat up and yawned he found Jason on the floor doing push-ups. The older teen was so concentrated that he hadn’t noticed Carl wake up.

“Working out?” Carl asked with another yawn.

“Yeah. I need to get stronger.” Jason answered in between heavy breaths. “Pete won the fight so I need to get stronger.”

Carl bit his lip absent-mindedly. He liked the sight of shirtless Jason working out as it made his muscles flex and tense a lot. The younger teen shook his head and rubbed his eyes as he swung himself out of bed and pulled on some pyjama bottoms to wear around the house.

“Have you eaten?” Carl asked as he walked over to the bedroom door.

“Nope. Got back from my run and now I’m doing this.” Jason replied in between gasps of exertion.

“I’ll go down and make breakfast.” Carl told him, opening the bedroom door.

“Carl, I told you that you don’t have to.” Jason tried to argue but Carl was already gone.

 

Everyone who had been allowed outside the walls were gathered together to help with the construction of the wall. They were all spread out on the four way intersection between Marshall Road and Redding Road. They had to blockade the intersection with a curved wall so that the walker herd would be forced to march west away from the community.

Everyone had been divided into smaller groups to work on separate areas. They didn’t have a lot of time to get everything ready before the herd would finally escape the quarry so they had to work fast. Some were acting as lookouts for walkers or dangerous people, others were planning the position of the metal sheets they had brought with them on a truck. Many others were digging up the ground, either to fill sandbags with soil or to make trenches for the wall and its support beams.

Despite the Alexandria residents’ timid reaction towards walkers and the outside world, many of them felt safe. They had several members of Rick’s group there to assist them and watch out for danger. They were also a sizable group with several vehicles and many guns, almost everyone had a gun on them. No one would attack a well-armed group of over twenty people. The biggest problem for most of them was the intense heat that the sun was beating down on them.

Jason was helping to place some of the first metal panels. Like everyone else, he was armed with his holstered Operator handgun and he had his machete sheathed on his belt as well. He helped carry one of the panels with Michonne who wore her sword on her back like always. As they made their way from one of the trucks towards the first section, Michonne decided to let her curiosity get the better of her.

“Jason, do you mind if I ask you something?” She asked with a smile.

“Ask away.” Jason replied with a matching smile.

“Your accent. It’s different.” She commented. “It’s similar to ours but there’s some kind of strange twang to it.”

“Yeah, I’m surprised I wasn’t asked sooner.” Jason answered as they put up the panel. “My family moved here when I was only six years old. My father never really lost his Scottish accent so I’m stuck with a bit of it too.”

“What brought your family to America?” Michonne asked him, curious about his past. “My parents met on a holiday but my mother always missed Georgia as it was her home. So we came back.”

The two of them walked back to the truck to get the next panel. Someone called for Michonne’s help so she abandoned Jason in favour of helping them.

Rick was crouched by the side of the road as he filled a sandbag with soil. The added weight of the bags would help support the wall’s beams and foundations from the inevitable abuse it was going to receive. He met eyes with Jessie who was also digging up a patch of ground and nodded to her. He hadn’t spoken to her since the fight with Pete and was giving her some space.

Daryl came over to him, pushing a wheelbarrow full of soil and dirt. He was about to get back to work but he wanted to talk to Rick first. The archer stopped and stood by him so they could talk.

“Hey, what you said before about us needing to take care of ourselves? Going out and finding more people? That is taking care of ourselves.” Daryl told him as he emptied the contents of the wheelbarrow onto the ground. “Your call though.”

With that said, Daryl turned and walked away from Rick. He didn’t give the former sheriff time to answer because he wasn’t looking for a conversation. They both knew they didn’t have time to stand around and chat when they had a wall that needed to be built. As Rick watched the archer walk away, Carol came up behind him with a plastic cup filled with water.

“Here.” She said and held out one of the cups.

“Thanks.” Rick said as he took the cup. He needed something to drink.

“You know, I could come with all of you.” Carol suggested, still pretending to be harmless. “You and Daryl have been teaching me how to shoot.”

Rick sighed from exertion. “I think you got the hang of it.”

They shared a smile. It was an amusing statement considering it had been Carol who had saved the group from the clutches of Terminus. She had become brilliant with all sorts of weapons and was one of the most adaptable, potent and dangerous members in the group. She was their trump card.

“You should stay back, get a feel for how people feel now.” Rick told her. “We’ve still got a long way to go with them.”

“We’ll get there.” Carol replied, still smiling. “She’s in charge but you’re in charge now.”

As Carol walked away, Rick considered her final statement. Though he had not taken leadership away from Deanna, it was true that the older woman trusted him explicitly after the events of the meeting. He truly was in charge of Alexandria, so there was certainly a glimmer of hope for the survival of the community.

Jason lifted one of the panels out of the back of the truck but as soon as he did he felt dizzy. The combination of the heat and the strain of exertion affected him somehow and made him drop the panel as he collapsed onto one knee. He held his head in an effort to stop the world around him from spinning. A pair of hands planted themselves on his shoulders and helped him to his feet so he could lean against the truck.

Jason opened his eyes and turned his head to find Morgan staring back at him with concern. They had never spoken before as Morgan was usually in the holding cell but Jason knew he was an old friend of Rick’s. The fact that Rick trusted him was enough for Jason to feel relaxed around the staff wielding man.

“Hey, you okay?” Morgan asked as Jason rubbed his forehead.

“Yeah, just a dizzy spell.” Jason answered. “I’ll be fine.”

“It’s Jason, right?” Morgan questioned, deciding to use the situation for introductions.

“That’s right.” Jason replied as he stared back at the man. “And you’re Morgan.”

“How long you been with Rick?” Morgan asked.

“A few months now.” Jason explained. “I was mostly alone before that.”

“I can see why he trusts you.” Morgan commented, staring into Jason’s eyes as if he was staring into his soul. “You care. You’ve got a big heart. Don’t let this world ruin that.”

Jason stared at him, perplexed at the revelation. “Thanks. I can see you’re the same.”

Morgan smiled and returned to his work as Jason’s dizzy spell had ended.

Tara watched from the RV as Glenn and Nicholas worked together to dig a trench for the wall. After waking up and asking for Noah, she had just been told that he died on the same run that got her injured. What she wasn’t told until later was that it had been Nicholas’ fault. Maggie had filled her in on Glenn’s story, how Nicholas had pushed open the revolving door and sacrificed Noah so he could escape. She hated the man. Noah was one of her best friends and he was dead because of the curly haired coward.

“He got Noah killed.” Tara hissed as Maggie walked up to her.

“He did. He did more than that.” Maggie revealed, making Tara whip her head round. “He lured Glenn into the woods and tried to kill him.”

“What the hell?” Tara gasped in shock.

“Yeah.” Maggie confirmed.

“What?” Tara whispered in disbelief.

“Glenn told me I could tell everyone if that was what I wanted to do.” Maggie told her. “He’d get Nicholas exiled. He’d die out there. I could have done that. We could do that now.”

“He got Noah killed and he tried to kill Glenn?” Tara repeated, her rage bubbling to the surface.

“Glenn saves people, even people like that. I couldn’t accept it either.” Maggie responded as they both stared at the two men. “But then I thought about you, how we were on different sides of that fence on the worst day of my life and now you’re one of the most important people in the world to me.”

Tara smiled at the statement but found it difficult to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall from her eyes. She missed Noah so much and was so angry to learn what Nicholas had done. Yet she knew she could have been looked at with equal distain after the attack on the prison but Glenn saved her.

“Things can get better. We can make them better.” Maggie told her. “You tell me what you wanna do.”

Tara shook her head and sniffed loudly as she held back her tears. “I’m just gonna follow your lead, okay?”

“Okay.” Maggie replied and pulled the younger woman into a gentle, comforting hug.

From afar, Glenn smiled as he saw them embracing one another. He knew that it meant Tara was going to trust his judgement and give Nicholas a chance at redemption.

Morgan placed one of the large metal sheets in place with several others. They would soon fix them into place to form the wall but for now it was all about organisation. As he walked back to one of the trucks, he dabbed his face and head with his shirt sleeve. The heat and hard work were really getting to him. Carol approached him with a tray of plastic cups.

“Here you go.” She said as she handed him a cup of water.

“Oh, thank you.” Morgan replied as he took the cup, the mere sight of fresh water was refreshing. “It’s Carol, right?”

“Yeah.” Carol answered with a grin, doing her best to act innocent.

“You been with Rick long?” Morgan asked.

“Since Atlanta.” Carol replied, still grinning innocently.

“And were you a cop too?” Morgan questioned, his gaze studying her.

Carol hesitated at the bizarre question but didn’t drop her act. “Why would you think that?”

“You’re always watching.” Morgan explained. “You always, uh, you seem ready.”

Carol felt extremely uncomfortable. It was as though Morgan could see right through her. “For what?”

“To handle things.” Morgan finished, looking around.

Carol smiled, though her hesitation was showing. “Aren’t you sweet?”

 

It was late evening as the sun had just disappeared beneath the horizon. The construction team had made good progress on the wall and were sure they would manage to get even more done the following day. Time was not on their side so they were working as fast as possible while making sure the wall was built properly. They couldn’t afford to have any accidents.

Jason and Carl sat in the living room of their house. They both sat on the sofa with Judith sitting in between them, cooing excitedly as they both took turns playing with her. Rick was upstairs getting cleaned up before they ate dinner. Carol was across the room from them in the kitchen making the dinner while Glenn was with Maggie at Deanna’s house.

“Jason?” Carl asked hesitantly, getting his boyfriend’s attention. “When we’re alone, I’d like to go all the way again.”

Jason coughed lightly as his face reddened. “You mean make love?”

Carl nodded. “Yeah. Can we?”

Jason thought for a moment as he played with baby Judith. She could get quite excited and stubborn once someone was playing with her. It was something he found utterly adorable.

“Yeah.” Jason replied with a smile. “I’ll need to get more supplies though.”

“Can’t Aaron give you more?” Carl questioned, not wanting Jason to go out on a supply run and risk his life.

Jason shook his head. “He could, but I’d rather have my own.”

Carl was about to argue the point but Jason leaned forward and kissed him gently, stroking his cheek as he did. When they broke apart, Carl couldn’t help but smile back at the older teen.

“Two seconds, going to talk to Daryl.” Jason told him as he stood up, much to Judith’s disapproval.

Jason headed out onto the porch, gently breathing in the cool night air as he found Daryl sitting on the bannister smoking. Jason walked over to the steps in front of where Daryl sat and looked out at the community. Some people were still walking down the dark streets but the community was turning in for the evening. Above them, the stars were bright and beautiful as they decorated the dark sky.

“Nice night.” Jason commented to the archer.

“Yeah, I guess.” Daryl responded, taking a puff of his cigarette.

“I was wondering if you’d be willing to help me with something tomorrow.” Jason began, turning to face the other man.

“Help you with what?” Daryl asked as he stubbed out the remainder of the cigarette.

“I’ve got a small, personal supply run to make.” Jason explained. “Do you mind coming with me for it? Carl would feel better if I went with someone.”

“We got more of that wall to build tomorrow.” Daryl pointed out, avoiding the initial request.

“That we do and we could do this run afterwards.” Jason replied. “It won’t take long. Besides, I know you’re not a fan of being cooked up in here.”

Daryl stared back at the teen before nodding his head. “Alright.”

Jason smiled with immediate gratitude. “Thanks.”

The sound of the front door creaking open caught his attention as Carl stood in the doorway with Jason’s guitar in hand. Jason smiled at him as he walked over and took the guitar from him.

“Would you mind?” Carl asked, a little hesitant despite it being Jason. “It’s kinda boring tonight.”

Jason nodded and walked across the porch to sit on one of the chairs. He crossed one leg over the other and placed the guitar on his lap. He checked that it was tuned before thinking about what song to play. He strummed a few tunes to test which ones he could remember and which ones he couldn’t.

The sound of his guitar playing, even if it was just little tests, started to draw some nearby residents to listen in. Rick and Carol walked out onto the porch as Maggie and Glenn returned from Deanna’s. Even Morgan came across the street to listen to Jason perform as it would be his first time hearing him.

“You know, my grandfather was one of the wisest people I have ever known and I remember him telling me there was an easy way to answer the hardest questions in life.” Jason explained to the growing crowd as he continued to strum gently. “All you do is go outside, wait for the sun to go down and the clouds to give way so the stars can come out. Whatever question you have, I guarantee you, they can answer it.”

Everyone listened intently, with a couple of them staring up at the sky above them where the stars twinkled peacefully.

“This song is close to my heart for a number of reasons but I’ll let you all have your own interpretations of it.” Jason told them as he stopped strumming. “This song is called Burning Bright.”

Jason started strumming the guitar strings slowly, the song was a slow one and more so when it was acoustic.

“I feel like there is no need for conversation, some questions are better left without a reason.” Jason sang gently. “And I would rather reveal myself than my situation, now and then I consider my hesitation.”

Jason strummed softly but the complexity of the tune increased as he hit the chorus.

“The more the light shines through me, I pretend to close my eyes.” Jason sang the chorus softly while strumming softly. “The more the dark consumes me, I pretend I'm burning, burning bright.”

Jason started strumming louder as he looked around at the faces watching him. He knew the song was a little darker than some of the others that he had performed but this one meant a lot to him. It was the first song he had ever dedicated to Kellin.

“I wonder if the things I did were just to be different, to spare myself from the constant shame of my existence.” Jason sang louder than before, his eyes scanning the small crowd. “And I would surely redeem myself in my desperation. Here and now I'll express my situation.”

Jason sang much louder, channelling energy into the chorus this time as he played the guitar just as loudly.

“The more the light shines through me I pretend to close my eyes.” Jason belted out, closing his eyes on cue. “The more the dark consumes me I pretend I'm burning bright.”

Jason continued playing, repeating the chorus loudly as he thought about everything Kellin had gone through. He remembered how much he had helped after his initial promise.

“The more the light shines through me I pretend to close my eyes.” Jason continued singing loudly. “The more the dark consumes me I pretend that I'm burning…”

Jason drew out the last syllable of the chorus as he breached into another verse, keeping the rhythm fast and the strumming loud. He sounded frustrated as he sang.

“There's nothing ever wrong but nothing's ever right, such a cruel contradiction.” Jason hissed as he sang passionately. “I know I crossed the line, it's not easy to define. I'm born to indecision!”

Jason hated how life always seemed to take a turn for the worst when things were going well. He hoped that wouldn’t happen to Alexandria but he was too wise to hold up any hopes of that.

“There's always something new, some path I'm supposed to choose, with no particular rhyme or reason!” Jason belted out before returning to the chorus.

“The more the light shines through me I pretend to close my eyes.” Jason sang as he strummed loudly, his foot tapping in time with the beat of the song. “The more the dark consumes me I pretend I'm burning bright.”

Jason kept going, making sure to stare at everyone around him. Many were who he considered his new family and he was grateful to have them.

“The more the light shines through me I pretend to close my eyes.” Jason belted out. “The more the dark consumes me I pretend that I am, that I'm burning.”

Jason trailed off before strumming much softer, just as he had at the start.

Jason sang the final line with the same gentleness that he had started the song with. “And I feel like there is no need for conversation.”

Everyone there gave him an appreciative round of applause but Jason was focused on Carl. Carl was staring at him with a grin of pride wrapped around his face. He felt so lucky to have a boyfriend who not only was a hardened survivor, a caring and fun person but also musically talented. In Carl’s mind, no one could ever surpass that combination.

 

_Kellin cowered behind Jason as gunshots rang out around them followed by loud screams. Their camp had come under attack by an unknown group of violent bandits, many of them wielding nothing but bladed weapons instead of guns. Jason stayed crouched in the tent with his Beretta 92FS aimed at the front of the tent. If anyone came in to attack them he would shoot them dead._

_Jason knew he was expected outside fighting but he refused to leave Kellin alone at a time like this. He had to protect his lover at all costs, just as he always had done. From where they were crouched inside the tent, they could see what was going on outside with the members of their camp who were fighting._

_Muffled gunshots sounded from the nearby RV where Sam was using the Accuracy International Artic Warfare sniper rifle to pick off some of the bandits in the dark. Ahead of them Carlos was shooting them with incredible accuracy using his mini Galil assault rifle. The most impressive display was coming from the former secret service member, Henry. As Jason and Kellin watched him defend himself and the camp it was clear he hadn’t been lying._

_A bandit rushed for Henry with an axe and swung at him vertically but the older man side stepped the strike with ease and grabbed the back of the bandit’s head. With one swift movement he stabbed the bandit in the back of the neck with his hunting knife, leaving the man paralyzed and dying on the ground. A second bandit tried to slash at him with a bowie knife but Henry expertly grabbed the man’s arm to stop the knife before he thrust his own knife under the bandit’s chin and right through to the brain._

_One of the last bandits left aimed a gun at Henry, feeling confident as he had the advantage of distance and a firearm. Suddenly, Henry pulled out his Magnum Research Mark XIX Desert Eagle and shot the other man in the head, the gunshot was surprisingly loud. Henry fired his gun two more times, downing unseen bandits before he holstered it again._

_The camp had been defended._

 

Jason slowly opened his eyes as he felt the heat of the morning sun streaming in through the bedroom window and onto the bed. He yawned and noticed that Carl was still asleep but facing away from him so he scooted closer and wrapped his arms around the smaller boy. Jason gently kissed the crook of Carl’s neck as he spooned him but was surprised when he heard a faint giggle.

“How long have you been awake?” Jason whispered into Carl’s ear.

“Long enough.” Carl replied, turning over to stare into Jason’s eyes.

Jason closed the gap between them and gave Carl a loving morning kiss, stroking Carl’s hair and cheek as he did. The broke apart, smiling at one another and revelling in each other’s company. Their eyes showed nothing but adoration for each other.

“I’m going to make us breakfast.” Jason told the younger teen as he swung his legs out of the bed.

“No, I’m supposed to be doing that for you.” Carl started to argue, also sitting up.

Jason sighed and pulled him in for a sudden, forceful kiss. He teased Carl’s tongue with his own as his hand caressed the back of the younger’s neck. When they broke apart, Carl’s pupils were slightly dilated.

“My turn today.” Jason stated and walked out of the room.

Carl laughed to himself, overjoyed at having someone in his life who would win an argument with a kiss.

 

At the intersection the construction was moving along smoothly. Almost all of the necessary trenches had been dug, all the sandbags had been filled and the metal support beams for the wall had already been put in place. They had started mounting the first of the metal sheets onto the wall with each segment requiring three long sheets of steel. So far only two sheets had been put in place but it gave a good idea of how it would look upon completion. Everyone was working hard and efficiently. The heat was punishing them every second but it would be worth it if it saved the community of Alexandria.

Rick walked up to Deanna, clutching his Norinco rifle. “I haven’t had the chance to say it yet but I’m sorry about Reg. He was smart and kind. He was a good man.”

Deanna nodded but remained silent. She was still struggling with her loss. Every time she returned home she expected to find Reg in the front room or in the kitchen but he never was nor would he ever be again.

“It was the right call, we need this.” Rick told her, gesturing to the wall.

“What else?” Deanna asked. She wanted to do everything right to keep the community safe. “You need to tell me.”

Rick thought for a moment, remembering the last time they had this conversation. “People need to be armed inside the walls, they need to be trained. Everyone.”

Deanna sighed. It wasn’t what she wanted but it was clearly what they needed. The two leaders stared at one another until a twig snapping caught their attention. They turned their heads towards the first panel of the wall where Carter and some others were working. Deanna was about to go over but Rick grabbed her arm.

“Stop.” He warned. “Here they come.”

Rick walked towards the men. “Carter, heads up!”

Carter and his men turned and looked at the treeline. From deep in the woods a small group of walkers had emerged, rasping at their prey as they shuffled towards the men. Everyone from Rick’s group came rushing over but he held out his arms for them to wait. This would be a learning opportunity for Carter and his men.

“Use your shovels.” Rick advised them. “Guns will draw more.”

Carter looked over as he shook with fear. “Help us!”

“You can do this.” Rick replied as he watched the walkers approach them. “You need to. All of you!”

The man closest to the advancing corpses pushed one of them away from him and backed himself against the wall. All of them were frozen in place like deer in the headlights of an oncoming car. They didn’t know what to do. They were paralyzed on the spot and more walkers were closing in. Morgan was the first to rush towards them.

“Morgan, don’t!” Rick called after him. The men wouldn’t learn if they always got saved by others.

Michonne, Rosita, Abraham, Daryl and Jason all broke rank to help the men, forcing Rick to do the same against his wishes. Morgan smashed the skull of one walker with his staff as Daryl shot another in the head with an arrow. Abraham caved in one of their heads with his shovel while Michonne used her sword to slice through them. Jason used the hammer he had in his hand to kill another walker while Rick and Maggie stabbed the last two in the head.

Rick glared at Morgan, angry that he had disregarded his orders. The people of Alexandria had to face walkers to overcome their fear and learn basic survival techniques. They couldn’t just continue to depend on other, more experienced people to save them every time they were in danger. Heroism would get these people killed in the long run.

“You said you don’t take chances anymore.” Morgan stated sternly. Those men were never going to muster the courage to fight back in that moment.

Rick glared silently, shifting his gaze to Carter who was also glaring at him. Everyone was. Rick shook his head and walked away from them. They still had a lot of work to do.

“Rick!” Jason called as he followed the group leader. “Rick! Slow down a second!”

“What?” Rick barked back, still angry at the previous disobedience.

“I get it. I do. They need to learn.” Jason told him, glancing back at Carter’s group. “But throwing them into the deep end like that is not the way to do it.”

“Well, how else are they gonna learn?” Rick retorted, tilting his head.

“You have to show them! You start with one walker at a time.” Jason explained. “You need to help them get over their fear.”

“That’s something only they can do.” Rick countered as he started to walk away again.

Jason followed him. “That’s true but we need to teach them. Not for their sake but for ours. You’re gonna be relying on them when you go through with the plan.”

Rick glared back but his expression softened. He didn’t have the patience to teach all of them how to do something as simple as kill a walker. However, he recognised that Jason did have a point and it was something he should probably find time for.

 

Jason got off Daryl’s motorcycle and looked around the area. Daryl cut the engine to his bike and also dismounted the vehicle, lifting his crossbow off the back of it and holding it at the ready. They had come into the nearest town for supplies according to Jason’s request and found the town to be mostly abandoned. The main street was littered with abandoned cars, many of which were badly damaged and rusting. The shop and house windows were black from dust and grime while the road was decorated with bits of paper, shards of glass and a couple heavily decomposed bodies.

The two men made their way down the road towards the town’s pharmacy. They kept their eyes open as they walked in silence, looking out for any potential danger from the undead or the living. Daryl kept his crossbow ready and Jason carried his TRP Operator handgun in both hands as they made their way down the street. When they walked round to the other side of an overturned bus they spotted the pharmacy. The windows were smashed and the sign above the door had almost fallen off. The name was still clear.

ALBERT’S PHARMACY.

In the street in front of the pharmacy were four walkers that were shuffling around aimlessly, having not yet noticed the approach of the two living men. Jason shoved his gun back into his thigh holster and unsheathed his machete, the sound of the blade being removed was enough to get one of the walkers’ attention. The corpse snarled and alerted the others to the approaching men.

“You got the two on the right?” Jason asked the archer beside him.

“Yeah.” Daryl rasped back as he took aim.

“I’ve got the other two.” Jason finished.

As the four walkers made their way towards the men, the two living humans went on the offensive. Daryl fired his crossbow and struck one of the undead in the forehead, sending it collapsing to the ground. Jason walked up to the closest walker to him and slammed his machete down onto its head, splitting its skull into two halves. He yanked the machete out of the sliced bone and grabbed the second walker by the throat to stop it biting him. Jason grunted with effort before stabbing the walker in the forehead with his machete, dropping the body to the ground. When he turned around, Daryl had already killed the final walker and was retrieving his arrow from the skull of the first.

The two men made their way towards the pharmacy and opened the door. Jason tapped the blade of his machete against the door and waited for any sounds of movement with Daryl behind him at the ready. When they heard nothing, they entered the pharmacy with their weapons raised. The store was small with only four shelves and no signs of life or walkers.

“There probably won’t be anything here but we might as well grab any medicine we find as well.” Jason told Daryl as he searched the shelves and knocked over stands.

“Better make it quick.” Daryl responded as he checked the shelves. “Those walkers had…”

“W on their foreheads, I know. I saw.” Jason cut him off. “You think those people are out here? This close to home?”

“Could be.” Daryl answered gruffly.

Jason didn’t respond as he finally found what he was looking for. The small coloured packages were unmistakable and as he expected, had gone largely ignored when other people had raided the store. Daryl came up behind him as he pocketed the packets.

“You and Carl fucking now?” Daryl asked bluntly.

Jason choked as he swallowed his own saliva in surprise, caught off guard by the question. He coughed as he stood up to his full height and stared back at the archer.

“Yeah, though fucking isn’t the word I would use.” Jason answered as he coughed lightly.

Daryl shrugged it off, not caring for proper terms. “Does Rick know?”

It was Jason’s turn to shrug. “I haven’t told him but I know he’s not stupid, so he probably knows.”

“Just try to keep it down, alright?” Daryl commented with a cheeky smirk as he made his way towards the front door.

Jason smiled, amused by Daryl’s blunt way of saying things. He followed the archer out of the pharmacy, not wanting to remain in the area in case the wolves weren’t far from them. The two of them wouldn’t stand much of a chance against a group of psychopaths.

 

 The gates of Alexandria opened as their approach had been signalled by the loud revs of the motorcycle engine. Daryl drove them in as the gates closed behind them, eventually parking his bike in front of their house. Jason got off the bike and heard the front door close as Carl walked out onto the porch.

“We’re still in one piece, as promised.” Jason told him, holding out his arms as if they had performed a trick.

Carl smiled. “Good, because my dad wants us out the house for a while.”

“Why?” Jason questioned.

The front door of the house opened up as Rick stepped out onto the porch. He gave Jason a curt nod before looking at Daryl.

“Daryl, we need to talk security.” Rick told the archer. “You coming?”

“Sure.” Daryl answered and made his way up the steps and into the house.

“That’s why.” Carl answered as they both stared at the closed door.

Jason shrugged, he didn’t mind too much because he trusted Rick. He could tell that Carl was at a loose end with nothing much to do. It wasn’t easy. Since Jason’s fight with Nicholas and Rick executing Pete, their social circle had diminished somewhat as Ron and Mikey were no longer a part of it.

“Lake?” Jason suggested the first thing that came to mind.

Carl nodded and smiled back at the older teen. Jason nodded and zipped up his pockets so none of the packets would fall out accidentally before walking with Carl towards the lake.

 

The two teenage lovers lay on the grass together, the calm water stretched out in front of them as they gazed up at the clear blue sky above. Jason sighed in content, relishing the moment and the time spent with Carl. The short supply run he made with Daryl had been enough to remind him what life was like for him for several months. Alone. Nothing but him and the dead. Abandoned cars, abandoned buildings and abandoned towns. Very little human contact. It amazed Jason that after all the hardship he could now lie back in a peaceful community with someone he loved.

“My dad says we can carry guns in here now.” Carl told him, still looking up at the sky.

“Seriously?” Jason questioned in surprise. “We’ll have to stop by the armoury on our way back then.”

“Why?” Carl asked. “We don’t need them.”

“I’d like to have a couple guns tucked away for a rainy day.” Jason answered.

A sudden bark silenced the rest of the conversation as Brodie, the chocolate Labrador rushed over and jumped on top of Jason, his tail wagging crazily as he licked Jason’s face. Jason petted the dog’s neck as he scrunched his face up from the warm, wet licks of affection he was receiving. After a few more licks, Brodie jumped from Jason to Carl to do the same, barking excitedly.

Jason sat up and spotted Trisha standing on the path, clearly she had been unable to control the big pup from coming over. Jason wasn’t sure if he and the woman were on talking terms after their argument, though the meeting had shown that her complaint had changed nothing. Beside him, Carl giggled happily as he played with the puppy.

“Have you come to argue or have you finally seen sense?” Jason asked the community’s teacher.

Trisha sighed. “I was at the meeting, I saw what happened to Reg and what Rick did.”

“And?” Jason questioned. Her response hadn’t answered his question.

“I trust Deanna’s judgement.” Trisha explained. “If she trusts Rick then so will I.”

“Good.” Jason responded. “It’ll be tough but it’ll be worth it.”

“I still don’t like it.” Trisha remarked as she beckoned Brodie back over to her.

“None of us do.” Jason replied honestly. “But it’s just the way the world is now.”

Trisha sighed in defeated acceptance and nodded. She attached the leash back to Brodie’s collar and continued walking him, waving back at Jason and Carl as she left. Jason smiled to himself. There was a hope that things would get better and the residents could change.

 

Eugene stood in the armoury as he collected supplies from one of the shelves. He could hear mutterings and hushed voices from the weapons room but didn’t pay much attention to them at first. They sounded like idle chat. The more he listened, the more sinister it started to sound.

“…He’s talking about a dry run tomorrow…”

“…This is not about taking out a wife beater…”

“…He was a murderer, Carter…”

“…What Rick wants to do is suicide…”

“…I’m sorry Spencer but Deanna is asleep in there…”

“…So it’s on us, we gotta stop him…”

“…What the priest said about him, about these people, was right…”

Eugene stopped gathered supplies and silently stepped towards the doorway to listen closer. He recognised Tobin, Spencer and Carter’s voices but he couldn’t make out the others right away. It sounded like a sinister and angry discussion about Rick.

“How many more of us have to die before we do something?” Spencer asked the others. “Because pretty soon it’s gonna be too late.”

“Carter, you need to be really careful here.” Francine warned the angered man.

“You’re talking about us going to Deanna and telling her…” Olivia started but was interrupted.

“No, I’m not talking about talking.” Carter interrupted her. “I’m not talking about meetings, I’m not talking about that.”

“So, what?” Tobin asked, his deep voice unmistakable.

“It’s plain and simple.” Carter told them, trying to convince them. “We kill him before he kills us.”

Eugene stood upright in shock. They were planning a coup against Rick’s leadership. He had to warn Rick and the others before something awful happened. He was so caught up in the necessity to tell Rick that he lost his grip on one of the jars he was holding. The glass jar slipped from his arm and crashed to the floor, smashing loudly on impact. Everyone in the weapons room turned to the doorway with Carter immediately spotted Eugene. The large man panicked and back up into the shelf, tripping and falling down against it with items crashing to the floor around him. Carter walked out and stood over him with a Glock 19 in his hand.

Eugene looked up at him, scared but fairly sure that Carter wasn’t a killer and greeted him awkwardly. “Hello.”

“Carter…” Spencer warned from inside the weapon’s room.

“He heard.” Carter replied grimly.

“I didn’t…” Eugene said instantly before mentally kicking himself. “I mean…I…”

“Carter.” Spencer warned again.

“He heard.” Carter repeated, a slight tremble in his voice as he aimed the gun at Eugene with a shaky hand.

“Carter, don’t!” Francine called out as Eugene raised his hand in a weak defence. “You can’t!”

Suddenly the back door opened to reveal Rick, Daryl and Morgan standing in the doorway. The three of them wore stern expressions as they took in the sight of Carter aiming a gun at Eugene.

“What the hell’s going on?” Rick growled, not moving from where he stood. “What are you doing?”

“Taking this place back from you.” Carter answered nervously, staring back at Rick.

“That’s what you were talking about in here?” Rick asked the others as he stepped inside.

“That’s what he was talking about.” Spencer replied, defending their group as none of them endorsed Carter’s plan.

Rick nodded, believing him. He was Deanna’s son and could very well have been pretending to support Carter just to learn things. Rick knew that he wasn’t stupid like his brother had been. Rick took another step closer to Carter as he grit his teeth.

“You see, I would have set up some lookouts.” Rick told them calmly, continuing to get closer. “That would have been the smart thing, you know, if I had to…”

Rick suddenly lunged forward, grabbing the gun with one hand and Carter’s arm with the other. He shoved Carter’s arm away from Eugene and slammed his hand against the wall, ripping the gun from his grip before tripping him. Carter landed on all fours as Rick stood over him, aiming the gun at the back of his head.

“You really think you’re gonna take this community from us? From Glenn? From Michonne? From Daryl? From me?” Rick barked furiously. “Do you have any idea who you’re talking to?”

“It was just me…” Carter whispered, his body shaking and his voice trembling with fear.

“What?” Rick barked, tilting his head, pressing the barrel of the gun against Carter’s head.

“It was just me.” Carter pleaded. “Just kill me.”

Rick stood still, the gun still against Carter’s head as he considered what he would do. Morgan watched with a grim expression. He believed all life was precious and he wouldn’t even think about killing Carter over something so trivial. Daryl was no pacifist but even he didn’t feel comfortable with executing Carter for something he only talked about doing.

“Rick…” Daryl spoke up, warning him not to.

Rick looked at Daryl before pulling the gun away. “I’m good. I’m good.”

Rick handed the gun over to Daryl as Carter remained where he was, unable to understand why Rick hadn’t just shot him. As far as he was concerned, that was what Rick was. A cold blooded crazed killer. Yet he had just spared his life.

“You can try to work with us. You can try to survive.” Rick told him. “Will you do that?”

Morgan looked on, pleased that Rick hadn’t pulled the trigger. There was still a good man under all of his rage and aggression. Carter breathed heavily from adrenaline as he nodded slowly. He would definitely try to work with them now that Rick had proven him wrong.

 

Jason and Carl greeted Olivia as they entered the armoury. They noted that the large woman was abnormally nervous and when questioned she explained to them what had happened with Carter. The two teens would have walked right into the whole situation had they arrived ten minutes earlier.

Jason checked the line of guns on the wall, all of the assault rifles, sniper rifles and shotguns were stacked against it. He watched as Carl took an M4A1 assault rifle which looked rather big compared to Carl himself. What Jason didn’t know was that it was the same assault rifle that Carl had used to defend the prison from a walker herd with Rick. He was familiar with the weapon and preferred it.

“Hey, Carl.” Jessie’s voice rang from the doorway. “Jason.”

“Hey.” They both greeted almost in unison.

Jessie headed over to the chest where all the handguns and revolvers were typically kept and pulled out a CZ 82 handgun. She closed the chest and appeared to be deep in thought as she looked at the gun. Eventually, she turned back around to face the boys.

“Jason, you were going to teach your students how to fire guns, right?” Jessie asked him, knowing about his lessons from Ron.

Jason nodded. “Yeah, that was part of the plan.”

“I’ll understand if you’re too busy, but can you teach me?” Jessie asked. “I need to know how to shoot.”

Jason smiled, he was glad to see her stepping up to face things. “Sure. We can start tomorrow.”

Jessie smiled and nodded. “I should get back. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

They watched her leave before Carl turned back to Jason. “Have you picked a gun yet?”

Jason holstered his Operator handgun and looked at the rack. “Not yet, give me a moment.”

After a few more moments he finally spotted a gun that was to his liking. It was an AKMSU assault rifle. It was smaller than most of the other rifles but was still robust. Jason tested his stance with the gun before noticing another large box in the room next to the handgun store.

“Olivia, what’s in the other box?” He asked out of curiosity.

“Parts, you know, like scopes and stuff.” Olivia answered with a smile.

Jason opened the crate and found there was quite the collection of parts that could be used to customise a weapon. The first thing he spotted was a gun sling which he immediately clipped onto the AKMSU so it was easier to carry around.

“What are you thinking?” Carl asked, walking over to join him.

“I’m going to add a personal touch to this gun.” Jason answered as he started lifting out parts.

Over the course of twenty minutes, Jason got to work attaching new parts to the assault rifle so it would be better suited to what he wanted. In the end, the gun looked rather different with all the modifications. Jason had attached a Zenit stock, a Tango down vertical grip, Aimpoint Micro T1 red dot sight, a magwell extension and a booster flash hider. He grinned like a kid at Christmas as he looked over the gun before slinging it over his back.

 

Morgan sat on the porch of Rick’s house and cleaned his staff. He liked to polish it and make sure it was always clean and well maintained for when he had to use it. He watched as Jason and Carl returned to the house with their new weapons and smiled at them both.

“Evening, Morgan.” Jason greeted.

“Hey.” Carl greeted as well.

“Good evening.” Morgan responded with a smile. “It’s good what you to have. Don’t let go of it.”

“What we have?” Jason questioned, a little confused.

“I know what you have.” Morgan told them. “You’re always together and you look at each other the same way my wife used to look at me.”

Jason and Carl realised instantly what he was talking about.

“Like I said, don’t ever let go of that.” He finished.

Jason and Carl smiled back as Jason answered. “We won’t.”

The two teens made their way past Morgan and entered the house so they could store their weapons away for safe keeping. Morgan resumed the polishing of his staff, looking out at the community in front of him. Behind him, Rick came out of the house carrying Judith in his arms.

“It’s nice out.” Morgan commented on the evening.

“Yeah.” Rick rasped.

“Hope you don’t mind, I wanted to enjoy the evening a little and I don’t have a porch over there so…” Morgan explained, looking up at Rick as he stopped cleaning his staff.

Rick reached into his back pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He tossed them to Morgan who caught them easily.

“Get your stuff.” Rick told him. “You should stay with us, over here.”

“You got room?” Morgan asked as Michonne stood in the doorway with a hot drink.

“Jason and Carl share a room, so yeah.” Rick replied with a smile. “We don’t need to do that anymore. I know you, Morgan. Even if this is the first time.”

Morgan smiled back at Rick, elated to have earned his friend’s trust again and to be considered part of his family. He looked up at Judith. She was proof that Rick was still a good man and like Morgan himself, was a father. Though Morgan had lost his son, he knew Rick would kill anyone and do anything to keep his children alive.

“You wanna hold her?” Rick asked him.

Morgan laughed delightfully and put his staff down. “Okay.”

“This is Morgan, he’s a friend of mine.” Rick told Judith softly before handing her over.

“Hey.” Morgan greeted gently as he took hold of her. “Hi.”

The two men smiled at each other before they sat down on the top step. They looked out at the community around them. It was a paradise in the middle of the apocalypse and they could make it secure so it would endure. The idea of Judith being able to grow up within the safety of the walls was a hope that Rick clung to subconsciously.

“You with that man, Carter, in the armoury.” Morgan said, staring at Rick. “That’s you. You’re still that same man I met in King County who came back and told me that it wasn’t over. That was you. The same you that’s sitting here in front of me right now.”

Rick appreciated the sentiment but he disagreed. He remembered that he had sworn to be honest with those around him, especially his family. Morgan was not an exception to that.

“I wanted to kill him. So it would be easier, so I wouldn’t have to worry about how he could screw up or what stupid thing he’d do next because that’s who he is.” Rick confessed, his tone venomous as he thought about Carter. “Just somebody who shouldn’t be alive now. I wanted to kill him. But then all that hit me and I realised I didn’t have to do it. He doesn’t get it. Somebody like that, they’re gonna die no matter what.”

Morgan stared at Rick in silence. He hated to admit it but his friend was probably right. Carter probably wouldn’t survive.

Inside the house, Jason and Carl had stored their guns in their bedroom and had since came back downstairs. They found Daryl in the kitchen eating a bowl of unidentified food rather hungrily. Seeing the biker’s crossbow resting against the kitchen counter reminded Jason of an earlier conversation.

“Don’t forget you promised to teach Carl how to use the crossbow and to track.” Jason commented, stepping into the kitchen.

“I can teach both of ya’ll.” Daryl answered after swallowing the remaining contents of the bowl.

“Cool.” Carl exclaimed with a grin. “When can we start?”

“After we deal with the herd.” Daryl promised to them.

Michonne walked in as Rick and Morgan continued to talk out on the porch. She smiled at the sight of the two lovers grinning as Daryl offered to teach them together. It was in moments like this that she felt like she truly had a family again. They were home and things were going well.

“Good to see you two so happy.” Michonne commented with a grin, getting their attention. “Carl here was a mess when you were in the infirmary.”

Carl lowered his head, feeling a little embarrassed at it being stated in such a blunt way. Jason smiled, however, and wrapped his arm around Carl’s waist.

“I’m sure he was. Just as I would be.” Jason confirmed.

“How are things with you two?” Michonne asked, after the ordeal with Jason’s injury and previous hallucinations.

“They’re really good, aren’t they?” Jason answered, rubbing Carl’s side as they stood together.

Carl giggled at the affectionate pride Jason took. “Yeah.”

“And this is how it is now.” Jason commented. “This is life now. No one is gonna take that from us.”

A silence fell. Carl, Michonne and Daryl had all thought the same at the prison only for the Governor to destroy it. They knew that Alexandria wasn’t as safe as it appeared and they couldn’t afford to get relaxed. Jason picked up on the morbid atmosphere.

“What I mean is, we’re not gonna let them.” Jason finished.  “We’ll kill anyone who dares to try.”

 

_A loud scream echoed around the area as Jason made his way down the road. He ran towards it, hoping it was a good person that he could help but when he reached the source in the next street his heart dropped in disappointment. On the ground next to a recently used car was the twitching body of someone who had been alive moments before. On top of the body there was a walker that was feasting on the chest cavity._

_Jason sighed and made his way over to the walker. He whistled to get its attention before stabbing it in the head as it tried to stand back up. He kicked the walker’s corpse to the side and frisked the dead man’s body. In the pockets were a couple granola bars and some loose bullets. Jason unsheathed the man’s knife and shoved it in his own bag along with the man’s fully loaded Smith & Wesson Model 629 Classic revolver. _

_Suddenly a pair of stiff, cold hands grabbed onto his shoulders as a loud snarl identified his attacker. Panic shot through Jason as the walker grabbed onto him from behind and tried to bite him so he spun his body round in the most violent twist he could. The walker stumbled back, giving him time to stab it in the forehead. The body fell backwards and slammed against the side of the car, prompting the car alarm to sound._

_The constant screams of the car alarm were deafening to Jason and echoed violently around him. He knew the sound would draw more walkers or dangerous people if he didn’t find a way to turn it off. The sound of metal against concrete reached his ears when he moved his foot, so he looked down to discover the car keys. The car obviously belonged to the dead man. Jason thanked him by stabbing his head before he unlocked the car and sat at the driver’s seat. He inserted the key into the ignition and the alarm immediately stopped._

_Jason sighed with relief and stepped out of the car. When he did, he convulsed in disgust as the awful stench of rotting corpses reached his nose. He could hear the loud chorus of snarls and looked around to find the alarm had attracted an entire herd of walkers. Both exits to the street were filled with the incoming walkers. Jason rushed into the nearest house and slammed the door behind him, hoping that the walkers would forget about him._

_After a few moments of catching his breath his worst fears were confirmed when a loud banging on the door began. The bangs extended to the glass windows as more and more members of the herd tried to get into the house. A sudden loud crash caused Jason to jump in surprise as the front door caved in, allowing a steady stream of hungry cadavers to flood into the front room. Jason dashed for the staircase and ran up it, hoping that the walkers couldn’t climb stairs due to rigor mortis._

_Jason looked down at the advancing herd and to his surprise discovered that they were indeed climbing the staircase. The walkers did so slowly but they would inevitably make it upstairs with him which would leave him trapped. The lonely teen stayed where he was and waited for the first corpses to reach him. As soon as they did he kicked the front one back down the stairs, causing all of them to fall down on top of one another into a large pile of dead flesh._

_Jason rushed through the house to one of the bedrooms and slammed the door behind him. He spotted that the window lead out onto the roof so he opened it and climbed out onto it. From where he stood he could see the entire road was filled with corpses, there had to be over a thousand of the cannibalistic cadavers swarming around him. He ignored them and climbed up onto the very top of the roof and lay down flat. He was obscured from view and hoped that something would distract the herd after a while. It was his only chance of escape._

 “Okay, so let’s start with the fundamental basics.” Jason explained to Jessie.

They were standing out the back of her house as Jessie’s shooting lessons had begun. She stood beside Jason with her CZ 82 in her hands. Jason began his lesson by taking the gun from her gently and pointing out the different parts.

“First, always have the barrel pointing away from you or anyone else.” Jason began, keeping it pointed at the wall. “Only thing it should ever be pointing at is whatever or whoever you wish to shoot.”

Jessie nodded, though it was obvious it was something that could slip the mind.

“See this little switch?” Jason asked, pointing to a little nob above the handle. “That’s the safety, flick it down to have the gun ready to fire.”

Jessie nodded as Jason explained this, demonstrating how to easily flick the safety with his thumb.

“When firing, you preferably want to have a triangular stance.” Jason explained, demonstrating the positioning. “So, legs slightly spread apart and both arms out, like a triangle.”

Jessie took the gun and attempted to recreate the stance but her arms were held out completely straight. Jason pushed her arms back to bend her elbows.

“You want your elbows to be bent a little.” Jason explained, pointing at the wall. “Same way they are bent when you point at something, okay?”

“Okay.” Jessie replied with a nod.

“You have twelve rounds in this gun, try to remember that and count them as you fire.” Jason explained before pointing to a small circular button on the side of the gun. “If you run out, eject the clip with that button and insert another if you have one.”

Jessie nodded, trying it out herself by ejecting the clip before sliding it back in. She flicked the safety off before flicking it back on again and retried her stance. To Jason’s nod of approval, her arms were bent the way he had instructed her.

“Mum!” Sam’s voice sounded from the garage, provoking a sigh from Jessie.

Jason smiled. “We can continue later. You need to be a mother first, there’s no rush.”

Jessie smiled back and shoved the gun into her jeans. “Thanks. This really is a big help.”

“I’ll stop by again tomorrow.” Jason told her. “Then, perhaps I’ll catch a couple walkers so you can use them for target practice.”

Jessie gave him a look that was a mix of shock and fear.

“Don’t worry.” Jason told her, raising his hand in an assuring gesture. “I’ll have my weapons at the ready. They won’t get near you.”

“They better not.” Jessie remarked as she made her way to the garage.

“Then you better shoot them.” Jason quipped with a cheeky grin.

 

A loud knock on the front door prompted Deanna to rise out of her living room chair and answer the door. She was still deeply upset and didn’t want to be disturbed but as leader of the community, she knew important issues could need attending to. She stared up in confusion and anger when she found Jason standing in the doorway.

“Deanna, before you slam the door in my face, please hear me out.” Jason requested gently.

Deanna thought for a moment before stepping aside to let the teen into her house. She closed the door behind him and turned to him, the same way she had done with Gabriel when he had issued his false warning.

“I know you’re probably sick of hearing this but…I’m sorry about Reg. I truly am. He was a wonderful man with a heart of gold and I would never have wished any harm upon him.” Jason explained gently and carefully. “I said nasty things to both of you and those things turned out being the last words I ever said to him. That makes me feel awful and ashamed of myself.”

“He wouldn’t have held them against you.” Deanna answered, her voice low and hoarse. “He knew you were trying to help and you were frustrated. You had every reason to be.”

Jason shook his head. “But the things I said were horrible, just like my whole attitude.”

“They were but they were true things.” Deanna responded. “I see that now. You, Rick and your people. You were all right.”

“I tried to stop him. Pete.” Jason confessed. “We fought and I lost my balance and hit my head on the corner of a table.”

“You tried.” Deanna replied softly. “You tried because you care.”

Jason swallowed heavily and nodded, letting out a sigh of relief as some of his pent up guilt was being released.

“I trust Rick to keep this community safe, to have us do what needs to be done.” Deanna told him. “I’m not giving up on this community.”

Jason let a small smile trace his face. “Neither am I. I could teach you how to fight, if you want.”

Deanna shook her head. “Teach the others first then you can worry about me.”

Jason nodded and opened the front door again. “If you change your mind, you know where to find me.”

 

Rick opened the door of the armoury and walked in to find Jessie standing with a clipboard, noting down some things. It looked like she was making a list of all the guns they had. She turned when she heard him walk in.

“Hey.” Rick rasped, feeling slightly awkward as they hadn’t spoken properly in a few days. “I was just getting more flares for tomorrow.”

Jessie lowered her clipboard and grabbed a box of flares from the shelf. She handed the box over to Rick who remained where he was standing in the doorway.

“I know I haven’t…” Rick tried to explain. “I just thought it might be best if I let things be for a while.”

Jessie nodded, accepting his respectful nature. “Ron told me what happened.”

“Yeah, I wanted to talk to you about that.” Rick replied, shaking his head. “He shouldn’t have been out there.”

“No, he shouldn’t have. You’re right.” Jessie stated sternly. “But you can’t talk to him like that, Rick. You can’t touch him. Not you.”

“Ron needed to hear every word I said, that’s why I grabbed him.” Rick explained. “I wasn’t angry, I was just telling him the truth.”

Jessie put the clipboard down. “If it’s coming from you, he can’t hear it. You gotta understand that.”

Rick nodded, he knew Ron saw him only as the guy who killed his dad. “He needs to learn how to handle himself, I can’t teach him. I can teach you. You need to know how.”

Rick picked up a gun and held it in front of her.

“Rick?” Jessie responded, revealing her CZ 82 handgun. “When I found out I could have them, I asked Jason to start showing me how.”

Rick raised his eyebrows in surprise. Jason hadn’t mentioned that.

“So he’s gonna teach me, then I’m gonna teach Ron and I’m gonna teach Sam.” Jessie explained, stuffing the gun into the back of her jeans. “Look, I heard what you were saying to us at the meeting and at my house before…I am gonna fight, Rick.”

Rick smiled. He was glad that Jessie was listening to him and was willing to change so she could survive. He didn’t need to push her into anything, she was smart enough to do it herself. He put the gun back down and nodded before leaving the armoury.

Rick stepped out onto the street where he found Jason walking past on his way back from Deanna’s. He gave his son’s boyfriend a wave as the younger man slowed down to wait for Rick to approach. When the leader reached him, Jason quickly started conversation.

“Rick, there’s something I want to double check with you.” Jason began as they walked together.

“What’s that?” Rick questioned with narrowed eyes.

“What you said at the meeting the other day, is that the real reason you don’t want me out there?” Jason asked. “Or do you not trust me with something like that?”

“That is the reason.” Rick answered gruffly. “We’ll be away for a while. I need people here I can trust and it can’t just be Carol, Rosita and Carl.”

“You think something will happen?” Jason asked as they approached the house.

“It could. We need to defend this place more.” Rick explained. “And those guys Morgan met aren’t that far from here.”

Jason nodded. “I just wanted to be sure. I won’t let you down.”

 

**So there we finally have it. I tried to get this chapter up sooner but it really wasn’t easy with everything that I had going on. I have also been writing chapter 26 at the same time as this one. I’m not a big fan of this chapter, personally but perhaps I’m being over critical again. You can let me know which it is.**

**I see this as a filler chapter as the next chapter is going to be very big and jam packed full of action. I just needed all of this filler/development stuff out of the way first.**

**Let me know what you think in the reviews/comments. What you liked, what you disliked etc.**

**Thanks for all the kudos/favourites/votes/bookmarks/follows/subscriptions etc.**

**Also thanks to the reviewers of chapter 24: Dark.SKY27, kingcarlgrimes, Sarah_94, zeenatlittles1, DarkScribe81, The_Man_Called_Madara, The Sorrowful Deity, Haileigh, and jupav123.**


	26. Overwhelmed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rick's herding plan is put into motion. While everyone is away, the community comes under attack from the elusive group, The Wolves, leaving Carol, Carl and Jason to defend Alexandria.

It was night and most of the community members were asleep at this point. Rick and the others had a big day ahead as it would be the dry run of the herding plan to deal with the walkers in the quarry. The day after that would be the plan itself. The night air was cool and the sky was clear with moonlight illuminating the streets outside.

Inside the warmth of their house, lying together on their bed were Jason and Carl. Despite everyone being in the house, Jason had surprised Carl by gently making love to him so they didn’t make any noise. It had been difficult and had required Jason to kiss Carl almost constantly to muffle his uncontainable moans. They lay together, listening to each other breathe as they basked in the afterglow of their love making. Jason moved himself closer and wrapped his arms around Carl’s smaller form, spooning the younger teen as he kissed the back of his neck.

“I love you.” Jason mumbled in his lover’s ear.

“Love you too.” Carl responded before yawning. Sex was tiring for him.

Carl turned around in their embrace, just enough so that they could share one last loving kiss before they let themselves drift off to sleep. Tomorrow would be another day and they were looking forward to it. The community was changing and life was finally peaceful. They could afford to relax and enjoy it.

 

Jason took deep breaths as he ran the perimeter of the community. Alexandria wasn’t big enough to be a one lap workout so he had to run multiple laps of the perimeter walls every morning to satisfy his routine. One thing he could say about surviving outside the walls for so long was that it had kept him in very good shape. It was a warm morning and another clear sky with the sun beaming down harshly.

While Rick and the others were gone the community would be a lot quieter which gave Jason ideas. He could use the quietness to his advantage and have a somewhat special day with Carl. He wasn’t sure what they could do since their options were limited but he was determined to find something. Jason was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he barely noticed a figure ahead of him.

Jason focused on who was ahead of him on his mental path and quickly realised it was Enid. She sat against the wall with a book in her hands, so engrossed in the story that she hadn’t heard his approach. He remembered that he had a few things he wanted to say to her and he didn’t want her interrupting his day with Carl. Jason slowed to a walk and approached her, the sunlight casting his shadow onto her and alerting her to his presence.

“Hi?” Enid greeted hesitantly, not used to being alone with the older teen.

“Morning.” Jason greeted curtly.

“What do you want?” Enid asked, still confused by his approach.

“For you to listen.” Jason told her as he stood over her. “When I told you I see things, I wasn’t lying. I was watching you and Carl in the tree last week.”

“We were hiding from roamers.” Enid quickly retorted.

Jason shook his head slowly. “That’s not all you were doing. I saw how you and Carl were looking at each other.”

Enid stood up, angered by his accusations. “I didn’t do anything to your boyfriend.”

“That’s precisely the point, actually.” Jason countered, folding his arms. “You didn’t try to stop anything, you didn’t remind him that you couldn’t be intimate. Fortunately, Carl isn’t the cheater that I think you want him to be.”

Enid scoffed at his remarks and tried to walk past him. “You’re crazy.”

“Doesn’t make me wrong.” Jason retorted sharply. “Do yourself a favour and stick to your own boyfriend and keep your hands off of mine, got it?”

“We’re just friends!” Enid snapped back at him.

“And that’s fine, so long as that’s all you are.” Jason replied sternly. “Because that’s all you’ll ever be.”

“Whatever.” Enid dismissed and walked away from him.

Jason took a breath to calm himself. There was something about the mysterious girl that just got under his skin. He didn’t know why but he really wished she would just hop over the walls and disappear. It would make his life easier without watching out for her making subtle moves towards Carl.

 

After Jason had returned from his run he headed upstairs to wake Carl. As expected, Carl was still asleep when he reached the bedroom and Jason struggled to wake him. The younger teen looked so peaceful when he was asleep it almost felt like a crime to wake him. Breakfast would soon be made so he had no choice but to place his hand on Carl’s shoulder and shake him awake.

“Morning sleepy head.” Jason greeted with a grin as Carl finally woke.

Carl grinned up at him. “Morning.”

“I’m about to hop in the shower.” Jason told him, giving him a morning kiss. “You can join me if you like.”

Carl grinned as he got out of bed. He could never deny the opportunity to shower with Jason as there was something really comforting about it. The sexual side to it was always exciting to him but it ultimately boiled down to routine. After so much chaos in his short life, Carl liked having a daily routine.

Ten minutes later they were both under the hot spray of the shower. Jason was rubbing the shampoo through Carl’s long, dark hair and being deliberately forceful so he could move his head around playfully. He always did this because Carl never seemed to get tired of it. These small moments they shared made Jason consider how lucky he was.

“You know, I’m shockingly lucky.” Jason commented as he rinsed Carl’s hair for him.

“Why?” Carl asked with a grin as he used the scrunchie to clean Jason’s torso.

“Because after the world ended, I somehow managed to find the cutest boy who’s still alive.” Jason commented, watching Carl wash him. “Not only that, but I managed to make him mine.”

“That’s funny.” Carl replied, this was a conversation they would often have. “Because I was thinking the exact same thing.”

Jason grinned. Although he would always miss Kellin, Carl was everything he could ever ask for. He remembered his discussion with Enid and how she seemed to make the odd move towards Carl. He couldn’t tolerate that. Jason captured Carl’s lips with his own and pushed him against the shower wall. The kiss was forceful and passionate as his hands rubbed Carl’s chest and navel before one hand slipped lower.

Carl gasped loudly when Jason’s hand found his member, already hard from the moment Jason kissed him. He moaned into the kiss as Jason started stroking him quickly, the older teen wasn’t being gentle or loving this time around. He was being aggressive. Carl loved it. Jason bit Carl’s neck gently as he sped up his strokes, earning drawn out mewls of pleasure from his younger lover.

Carl also bit Jason’s neck as he managed to bring his own hand down to Jason’s solid shaft. He started stroking the older teen at the same speed as he was being stroked. Both of them breathed heavily against each other’s skin as they stroked each other fast. This was all about possession, it was a release and a way of claiming each other. They understood each other on this basic, almost animalistic level.

Carl suddenly gasped out Jason’s name as he spilled into the older teen’s hand. The strokes had been so fast and so precise he just couldn’t last. The sound and sight of his completion was more than enough to send Jason over the edge as well with a deep groan of Carl’s name. They let go of each other and embraced under the water, kissing lazily as they let their heartbeats slow down. Carl had to admit, as loving and gentle as Jason could be, his aggressive side was a lot of fun.

Once they had finally gotten dressed and descended down the stairs to join the others, they sat at the dining table for breakfast with Rick, Michonne, Morgan and Carol. While they ate, Carol was busy feeding Judith as she insisted on keeping up her innocent persona in front of Morgan until she trusted him. That trust would take a long time to earn so everyone else had to play along with her housewife routine. The atmosphere at the table was mostly serious as Rick and the others had the dry run ahead of them.

“So, how long do you reckon you’ll be gone for?” Jason asked out of curiosity.

Rick thought for a moment before answering. “A couple of hours. We need to go through the whole plan and have Daryl, Sasha and Abraham check the road they’ll be taking tomorrow.”

“For anything that could be in the way for those twenty miles, right?” Jason asked to confirm.

Rick nodded. “Yeah. We don’t want anything going wrong tomorrow.”

“And you’re sure about me staying here?” Jason questioned, feeling uncomfortable being stuck inside the walls.

Rick stared at him with a stern expression. “I need you here to protect Carl, Judith and Carol. Keep them safe in case anything goes wrong.”

Jason glanced down at the table to hide the smirk that bravely crossed his lips. The idea of him protecting Carol was laughable but he had to keep up appearances in front of Morgan. He played it off as disappointment before nodded in acceptance.

“I’ll keep them safe.” Jason finally answered. “You have my word.”

Rick stood up and walked over to the kitchen, dumping his bowl in the sink as he knew Carol would clean up later. He checked his watch and nodded to Michonne and Morgan. It was time. The three of them headed out the front door after saying their temporary goodbyes before heading for the armoury.

Jason and Carl walked out onto the porch to observe the setup at the gates. Down by the main gate all the vehicles and most of the people involved in the plan were ready. A large flatbed truck would transport most of the people, while the other vehicles were the car Sasha and Abraham would be in along with Daryl’s motorcycle. Everyone was armed to the teeth with a mixture of handguns, assault rifles and shotguns.

“They’re gonna be fine.” Carl commented as they watched Maggie kiss Glenn goodbye.

“I know.” Jason replied with a smirk of amusement. “Apart from Carol, us and Judith, they’re the toughest people here.”

Carl giggled at Jason referring to Judith as one of the toughest members of the group, though it was arguably true. In Jason’s mind, he knew that if Judith was able to survive for several years then she’d grow up to be the ultimate survivor. He hoped he’d get to live long enough to see that as well.

 

Rick stood at the side of the main road where they had some green balloons tied to tree branches. He was going through the plan in reverse order on their way there. On either side of the road there were deep ditches, a good natural barrier that would keep the herd on the road. He made sure everyone was listening to him as he explained the plan.

 “Alright, this is the finish line. When we make it to Green we fall back, the ditches and ridges will keep them on the road.” Rick explained to the group. “We head home and let Daryl, Sasha and Abraham take them the rest of the way. Twenty miles more. Alright, let’s go.”

As Rick led the large armed group away, Abraham walked up to Sasha. “Got a question for you, just some Intel for our little road trip tomorrow.”

“Ask me.” Sasha replied with a smile.

“You doing this cause you wanna die?” Abraham asked her bluntly.

Sasha smiled widely. “No.”

 

Jason and Carl sat on the roof outside their bedroom window as they often did. It was a good way to get away from people while still being able to keep an eye on things and it always reminded them of when they first met. They basked in the sun, enjoying the morning warmth before they really started their day. A knock from the bedroom window brought them out of their daze. Both boys turned to look at the window and found Carol standing there.

“I’m going to get some more food for cooking.” Carol told them. “Keep an eye on Judith until I get back.”

“Will do.” Jason replied with a nod as he stood up.

Carl joined him and followed him back through the window and into their bedroom as Carol headed downstairs. They were about to take the time to share a little intimacy when the cries of baby Judith sounded downstairs as soon as Carol slammed the front door shut. Jason cursed under his breath, knowing the hardened woman had slammed it on purpose. He and Carl shared a laugh as they both knew Carol was on to them.

“Coming, princess!” Jason called down to Judith as they left the bedroom.

 

The armed group had stopped in front of a tractor dealership. Inside the small building there was a pack of walkers constantly banging on the doors and windows. Another walker was trapped under one of the tractors that sat outside the building. They were incredibly loud as they rasped, snarled and banged on the glass repeatedly.

“We’re gonna take them right past here.” Rick explained to them as they stood outside the tractor place. “All that noise could distract them, we’ll clear it on our way back tonight. We don’t want any surprises tomorrow.”

As the group moved on, Glenn approached Nicholas.

“Hey, what you’ve done? You’re gonna sit with it a while.” Glenn told him. “Cause I don’t want you out here tomorrow. You’re not ready. You will be, sometime soon I’ll make sure of it then you start to make it right.”

Nicholas nodded. Glenn was giving him a chance to earn his redemption. “Thank you.”

 

Carl swung his arm round as he tried to hook Jason in the face with his fist but the older teen blocked the strike with his forearm, stopping Carl’s punch from reaching him. In response, Jason shoved Carl back with his free hand and shook his head.

“Try again.” He told the younger teen.

They were outside on the grass that separated the two houses while Judith was on the porch in her stroller. Jason was teaching Carl how to fight better but was so far unimpressed with Carl’s attack methods. They needed to be better. Carl swung again, another wide hook that Jason blocked again, though this time he wrapped his arm around Carl’s to trap it. Carl tried to pull back and couldn’t. Jason used his free hand to launch a punch at Carl’s face, stopping an inch from it while making an impact sound with his mouth.

“Punches are usually better when they travel in a straight line.” Jason explained, releasing Carl’s arm. “They’re harder to avoid that way.”

Carl nodded and prepared to attack again. His next punch travelled in a straight line, aimed right for Jason’s face which forced him to quickly side step to avoid it. They smiled to each other before Jason gave his next piece of advice for his apprentice.

“Remember that the first rule about fighting is that there are no rules.” Jason explained. “Use everything, especially kicks as they can be quite powerful.”

Carl nodded before immediately attempting to kick Jason in the side. He tried his best to mimic a kick he had seen in a martial arts movie when he was younger but turning his body side on as he swung his leg into Jason’s side. The older teen side stepped away from the kick and grabbed Carl’s leg with his arm. Jason smirked mischievously before moving forward, placing his leg behind Carl’s other leg and pushing the teen so that he fell on his back.

Once Carl landed on the grass Jason descended upon him by straddling his waist, grinning down at him in victory. He threw a few mock punches to Carl’s face and chest while Carl tried to block them. When the younger teen started successfully blocking them, Jason grabbed his wrists and pinned his arms to the ground by his head.

“Last place you want to be is on the ground.” Jason told him as he grinned down at him. “So, how do you get out of this one?”

“I can get out of this easily.” Carl bragged confidently, grinning back up at his lover.

“Oh yeah?” Jason challenged, leaning down further. “Prove it.”

Carl grinned before quickly leaning up and kissing Jason strongly, breaking it to bite his lower lip eliciting a deep groan from Jason’s throat. Jason loosened his grip on Carl’s wrists so the younger teen’s hands could find their way into his hair as they continued the kiss. The rest of the world had completely disappeared, as far as they were concerned they were the only two people on Earth.

As if sensing their intimacy and how content they were, baby Judith decided it was time to interrupt them before things went too far. She erupted into a stream of wails, demanding their immediate attention. Both boys broke the kiss and sighed before Jason stood up, helping to pull Carl off the ground before they both made their way back onto the porch. Judith was hungry and needed to be fed.

 

Rick climbed up onto the back of the flatbed truck they brought with them to the quarry. He looked at the mix of faces, some of them confident while others were nervous. Behind him, the loud, unnerving chorus of undead rasps and groans echoed around them.

“Look, I know this sounds insane but this is an insane world. We have to come for them before they come for us, it’s that simple.” Rick explained to the group below. “This is where it all starts tomorrow. Tobin gets in the truck, opens the exit and we’re off. He hops south, catches up with his team of Red, staying on the west side of the road. Daryl gets on his bike.”

A loud noise echoed across the quarry as the group’s attention turned to it.

“You see that?” Sasha called and pointed.

Rick turned to find the source of the sound. They all watched as the ground beneath one of the large trucks blocking the exit gave way. The side of the quarry crumbled and with a loud, metallic groan, the truck fell off the edge and crushed the walkers beneath it. The walkers that had been standing behind the truck now were free to leave the quarry and had already started making their way out.

“It’s open! We’ve gotta do this now!” Rick shouted to them, jumping down off the truck. “We’re doing this now! Tobin’s group, get moving, go!”

“No, no, Rick, we’re not ready!” Carter pleaded, terrified.

“Sasha, Abraham!” Rick continued, ignoring him.

“Damn straight, we’ll do it live!” Abraham replied as he and Sasha ran for their car.

“You meet Daryl at Red, let him take them through the gauntlet!” Rick commanded.

“Yeah, we’ll meet at Red!” Sasha confirmed as they got in the car.

“Go!” Rick bellowed.

On the other side of the quarry, the walker herd was already making its way past the other truck. Sensing the movement of their companions, the other walkers at the bottom of the quarry had started marching up the road towards the open exit.

“Rick, I’ll hit the tractor place!” Glenn told their leader, remembering that it had to be taken care of.

“Okay, who else?” Rick questioned quickly.

“We gotta take them out or they’ll distract the horde.” Glenn told Heath.

“I’m here, let me help.” Nicholas pleaded with Glenn.

“No.” Glenn was quick to respond, not trusting Nicholas at all after Noah.

“I’m here!” Nicholas shouted, the safety of Alexandria more important.

“Do everything I say.” Glenn growled.

“I will.” Nicholas nodded. He knew he’d die if he screwed up again.

“Rick, this was supposed to be a dry run!” Carter pleaded, not trusting the plan.

“Daryl, get ready!” Rick called, continuing to ignore him.

Daryl stood with his crossbow aimed at the gap between the trucks. “They’re coming!”

The first walker was starting to slide through the gap, reaching its arm out as its skin started peeling off because of the sharp metal. Michonne held her sword in her hands, ready for anything as Sasha and Abraham drove off.

“Rick, we haven’t even gone through the whole plan!” Carter continued to complain.

“We can’t go back!” Rick bellowed aggressively. “We’re finishing this!”

Rick turned away from him. “Tobin! You hit it on my signal!”

Carter ran away, knowing there was no convincing Rick that they weren’t ready. He knew Rick was about to open the exit and have the horde come pouring through towards them.

“They’re headed for home, we don’t have a choice!” Rick roared as the others started running away as well. “Get ready to hit the flares!”

Once everyone but he and Daryl were a safe distance away, Rick gave the signal.

“Now!” Rick yelled and dropped his raised arm in case they didn’t hear him.

Michonne, Morgan and the others started firing their flares into the sky. They also fired a couple of their guns. They were trying to get the attention of half the walkers in the quarry and it was working. The hungry corpses were pounding loudly against the trucks, desperate to get to them. The first walker finally squeezed through the gap, most of its skin ripping off in the process.

“Tobin! Move the truck!” Rick shouted as it stumbled towards him.

Tobin did as Rick ordered and drove the truck forward, opening the exit on their side to let the walkers through. Daryl fired his crossbow and killed the first walker with an arrow to the head so Rick had time to run away. Rick ran for the road while Daryl ran for his motorcycle. Behind them, the walker army started marching after them, snarling and growling loudly in chorus.

 

Judith was sleeping again after having been fed by Carl. She was a delight when she was in a good mood but when she needed something she was more demanding than Rick was. Although it was something that could become annoying, there was something endlessly endearing about the little bundle of joy that slept in the cot beside the couch.

On the couch, Jason and Carl sat together, one arm around each other’s shoulders as they lost themselves in each other’s mouths. Their tongues had become familiar with the spaces they duelled in and their jaws had become used to the constant exertion. The two teens smiled into the kiss before breaking apart and resting their heads back, staring up at the ceiling silently.

“What were your other friends like?” Carl asked his boyfriend suddenly.

Jason smiled at how abrupt Carl could be. “Well, Ryan was probably my closest friend.”

“What was he like?” Carl asked, turning to look at Jason.

Jason smiled. “He was tough, he’d been through a lot but it didn’t break him.”

“What had he been through?” Carl asked, curious about the difficulties of life before the apocalypse.

“Nothing compared to this world but he lost his parents in a car accident.” Jason explained, remembering the day he had heard the news. “A few months later, his girlfriend took her own life. She never left a note so no one ever knew why.”

“How did that not break him?” Carl questioned with serious concern and curiosity.

Jason shrugged. “I don’t know. But it was a really tough time for him. We even had a fight.”

“Why?” Carl rasped in confusion.

“I tried to get him to open up, to grieve because that was something he wasn’t doing.” Jason explained with a sigh. “He got angry, we fought and he beat me until he finally started crying.”

Carl stared at Jason, astounded that his closest friend had beaten him up for trying to help him, something that he seemed to be perfectly okay with.

“He apologised, not that he really needed to.” Jason continued. “He was okay after that.”

“What happened to him?” Carl asked. “You know, when everything…”

“When the world ended?” Jason finished for him. “I don’t know. I tried to find him but never did. I like to think a tough guy like that is still out there somewhere.”

“Maybe you’ll see him again.” Carl offered optimistically. “I mean, you survived, right? Maybe he did too.”

Jason smiled and kissed Carl again, grateful to have him. “I hope you’re right.”

 

 “You all have your assignments. You know where to rendezvous.” Rick spoke to them over the radio. “Daryl leads them out, Sasha and Abraham join him at the bottom of the hill.”

Sasha and Abraham sped down the road with Sasha at the wheel. On either side of the road were long rows of abandoned cars. Abraham leaned out the window with his M16 and took aim at a walker. As they approached he fired and shot a hole in its head before leaning back inside.

Behind the car, several other members of the group ran down the road. They would stop from time to time to fire flares into the air to keep the walker herd’s attention on them. On the other road, Glenn, Heath and Nicholas made their way down also firing flares. Just like the other road, they had lined the sides with abandoned cars to help funnel the walkers down the path.

“Glenn, you hit us when you take care of the walkers at the tractor place, that’s the one thing we gotta get ahead of.” Rick continued. “Everybody, keep your heads. Just keep up.”

Rick, Morgan and Michonne ran down the same road that the car had driven down. They reached the main road and continued along it. Rick stopped momentarily to look back and check on Daryl. At the top of the road, Daryl appeared over the hill on his motorcycle, driving very slowly so the walker army behind him could keep up.

 

Carol stood in the pantry section of the armoury with Olivia, Erin and Shelly Neudermeyer. She reached for one of the tins of celery cream as there were plenty of them because no one ever used them.

“Celery soup.” Olivia commented, cringing slightly. “It’s been here since the start, you’re very brave.”

“Well, I’m hoping the paprika will mask the soup’s celeryness.” Carl replied with a smirk of amusement.

“Then you’d be stuck with something that tastes like paprika.” Shelly added in disgust. “No thank you.”

“Well, I just figured since we’re running low on staples I’d try to use a few things nobody seems to want.” Carol argued her case as she grabbed a couple more tins. “I used to make Ed these spring cleaning casseroles just to empty the pantry.”

Carol hesitated, the dark memories of her abusive husband coming back to her along with the everlasting desire to see him again just so she could kill him. Realising she was zoning out she snapped back into her public character.

“I made some miracles happen with water chestnuts.” She finished with a proud grin.

“Talk about miracles, that recipe for cola canned ham?” Erin added with a hum of delight. “Ms Peletier, you are an honest to goodness hero.”

Carol grabbed a box from one of the shelves prompting a sound of disgust from Shelly.

“Something wrong, Shelly?” Olivia questioned in concern.

“Uh…it’s just those old noodles.” Shelly replied, her face contorting with revulsion. “I mean, I tell ya, if someone would just find me one of those machines I swear we would all be eating like we were on a tour of Tuscany.”

The others fell silent for a moment, all of them sick to death of hearing Shelly drone on about her coveted pasta maker. Carol, however, decided to take a more active approach.

“You know, Shell, I could teach you how to make pasta with your own two hands.” Carol told her with a friendly grin. “But you’d have to promise not to smoke in the house, it’s just a disgusting habit and it kills you. If you ask me there are too many things trying to do that already, right?”

“Right.” Erin agreed.

She and Olivia were secretly enjoying Shelly’s expression of offence from Carol’s criticism of her. The two women had never had the guts to say something to put the other woman down but Carol had done so easily. They smiled as they watched Carol leave.

 

Sasha and Abraham sat in the car as they sped along the road. They had to meet up with Daryl where the two roads met so they could help him guide the walkers in one direction. Sasha glanced at the speedometer as they blasted down the road at seventy miles an hour. They would make it there in good time at that speed, though they would also need to conserve fuel for the rest of the run. They would need to guide the herd several miles away before they could return home.

“You good?” Abraham asked, watching as the world shot past the windows.

“Yeah.” Sasha nodded, feeling his eyes on her. “I’m trying.”

“Listen, if you’re still looking to go buck wild with the breath impaired…” Abraham began, knowing that she had recently struggled to remain sane.

“You already asked the question and I already answered it.” Sasha interrupted him, narrowing her eyes. “If you were so worried then why the hell did you get in the car with me?”

Abraham fell silent and stared ahead of them down the road. It was a fair point and one he wasn’t willing to answer in that moment. He wasn’t asking out of fear.

“Listen, doing something as big as this? That’s living.” Sasha added, earning another look from Abraham. “There it is.”

She slowed the car down and brought it to a stop by some red balloons that were strung up to a tree. This was the meeting point for them and Daryl, who would be arriving shortly with the herd.

“We’re at Red at the bottom of the hill.” Sasha told them through the radio.

“Alright, here comes the parade.” Daryl answered.

 

When Carol returned to the house she found Sam sitting on the porch steps with his stamp in his hands. He looked to still be upset from the loss of his father and clearly didn’t know what to do with himself. Life was much quieter for him now, both in a good way and in a bad way.

“Your dad used to hit you then he got himself killed. It happened. Now it’s done.” Carol told the boy bluntly. “You live with it or it eats you up. Go home.”

Carol didn’t wait for an answer from the boy and simply walked up the steps and into the house. As soon as she walked in she spotted Carl and Jason embraced on the couch. Her return prompted Judith to wake up, letting out a few soft coos to announce to them all that she was ready to receive all their attention.

“It’s a nice day today.” Carol told them. “You should take Judith out while I start cooking.”

“What you mean is you want us out of your sight.” Jason jested as he stood up. “Don’t want our PDA to distract you from your culinary arts, right?”

Judith cooed as Carol glared at him with an amused smirk. “Go.”

“We’re going, we’re going!” Jason laughed as Carl lifted Judith out of her cot.

The two boys headed out onto the porch where Judith’s stroller was and placed her inside it. They lifted it down the stairs before Carl started pushing it along the street with Jason by his side. It was a very pleasant, calm day and one that should be enjoyed. It was also good to be able to take Judith out without worrying for her safety.

 

Rick, Morgan and Michonne emerged from the woods and onto the road. The herd would be approaching soon and they needed to be ready at the turning point, marked as Orange. Rick unclipped his radio from his belt.

“Glenn, you there yet?” Rick asked his Asian friend. They needed to kill the walkers at the tractor place.

“Almost.” Glenn responded. “We’ll have a handle before they get here and we’ll meet you at Yellow.”

“Copy that.” Rick answered and clipped the radio back onto his belt.

The three of them stood and looked towards the barricaded turning point. They had a couple sedans and the RV parked end to end up against the same sheet metal walls that surrounded Alexandria. After days of hard work they had successfully built a strong barricade, curved just as Eugene had suggested. A couple orange balloons were tied to the roof of the RV.

“It’ll hold.” Rick assured them as they caught their breaths.

“Well, that’s good.” Michonne sarcastically. “You know, considering where we’re standing.”

“Michonne?” Morgan spoke suddenly, fidgeting as if he was nervous about something.

“Yeah?” Michonne answered, concerned for her new friend.

“Back when you were in that place, where I lived.” Morgan questioned seriously. “Did you take one of my protein bars?”

Rick turned his head and narrowed his eyes. He couldn’t believe that Morgan was seriously asking that as if it was important. Michonne was equally surprised, both because he was asking and for having remembered it for so long. She had indeed eaten one of the protein bars but his doormat did have “welcome” written on it.

“No.” Michonne replied, feigning innocence the best she could.

“See, I could have sworn there was one more peanut butter left.” Morgan added, not convinced.

Michonne sighed. “That’s how it is, isn’t it? You always think there’s one more peanut butter left…”

From the other side of the barricade, they could hear the snarls and raspy growls of the incoming walker herd. They were all incredibly thankful that the wind was blowing away from them so they wouldn’t have to endure the horrendous stench of hundreds of corpses.

 

As Jason and Carl walked along the street with Judith they didn’t talk much. They were allowing themselves to soak in the calm atmosphere of Alexandria with the sun beating down on them and the birds singing overhead. Despite how tranquil and safe the community was, they both continued to carry their guns. Carl carried his Beretta 92FS in his thigh holster while Jason carried his Springfield Armory TRP Operator in his own thigh holster.

One thing the two of them knew was that in the apocalyptic world there was no such thing as safe. Any manner of things could happen and they’d need to be ready for them but while things weren’t happening they allowed themselves to relax a little. Carrying their guns made them feel much safer as it meant they could defend themselves, the community and especially Judith from any sudden threat.

A familiar bark interrupted the morning silence as the dark, bouncing form of Brodie, the chocolate Labrador, bounded up to them excitedly. He immediately placed his paws up on Jason’s thighs in an attempt to lick his face. Jason laughed at the big puppy’s demands for affection as he petted the sides of the dog’s neck. Brodie barked up at him, his tail wagging crazily behind him.

“I swear he’s happier to see you than he is to see me half the time.” Trisha remarked as she walked up to the two teens.

“He sees you all the time.” Jason replied with a grin. “He doesn’t get to see me nearly as much.”

Jason gave Brodie a final pat on the side before the excited pup placed his paws on Carl’s thighs and demanded similar affection from the younger teen. Carl didn’t mind and joyfully gave his full attention to the dog for a few moments.

“Well, maybe he could get to see you more often if you spent more time at my place.” Trisha suggested with a friendly smile.

Jason furrowed his brow and narrowed his eyes at her. “Come again?”

Carl’s eyes had also snapped up at the woman, also sensing the awkwardness of such a vague remark. Jason would need a reason to spend time at her place and Carl felt his body tense at the thought of them spending a lot of time together. Carl was so close to Jason that he often forgot that other people found him attractive and appealing as well.

Sensing their suspicion, Trisha quickly raised her hands in defence. “Not remotely what I meant!”

“Then what did you mean?” Carl was quick to question, feeling suddenly protective.

“Look, I want to live.” Trisha explained as Brodie returned to her side. “I want to learn how to survive and was hoping that Jason could teach me.”

Carl felt himself relax, the tension in his body fading. Jason unconsciously did the exact same thing. Her wording hadn’t been the best but it should have been obvious that her intentions were to learn something. Jessie had already asked and Jason had offered the same to Deanna.

“Yeah, that can be done.” Jason finally answered. “I’ll work out a schedule and come by later for your first lesson, okay?”

“Okay, thanks.” Trisha replied with a smile. “Should I get a gun from the armoury?”

Jason shook his head. “No, if you need one I’ll bring it with me.”

Brodie barked again and pulled at his lead, desperate to go running around the community and especially on the grass near the lake. Trisha rolled her eyes and let herself get pulled away by the happy pup, calling back at the teens with a couple words of gratitude before walking with Brodie.

Jason instinctively wrapped his arm around Carl’s waist and kissed his temple quickly. “You’re cute when you’re possessive.”

Carl blushed. “I’m not possessive.”

“You are.” Jason quickly retorted. “And I like it.”

Carl smiled as they continued to walk with Judith. If Jason liked his possessive side then that was reason enough not to tame it or control it. As they walked slowly, allowing Judith to take in her surroundings as she looked around with wide eyes, Jason snapped his fingers as he remembered something.

“I totally forgot to thank Aaron for lending the supplies.” Jason commented. “You don’t mind if I go on ahead and do that, do you?”

“Sure, go ahead.” Carl replied. “I’ll catch up.”

“Thanks. I promise I won’t be long.” Jason answered before jogging up the street.

 

Jessie fidgeted with the pair of scissors in her hands. On the kitchen counter her other hairdressing equipment was laid out and the chair in front of her already had a towel over it. She was waiting for Ron to come down to get his hair cut as his hair was getting too long. She also needed to talk to him about his father and about how things needed to change.

“Ron!” She called out but was met with silence. “Ron, can you come down here?!”

The thudding of feet on the staircase signalled his approach as her teenage son descended the stairs and entered the kitchen. He glared at her, seeing the chair and the scissors. He knew his mother well and he knew her plan.

“No.” Ron said abruptly and turned to leave.

“Ron…” Jessie began gently.

“No, I don’t wanna a haircut.” Ron interrupted her, lifting his arms defensively as he gestured at the chair.

“Look, I just gave myself one, alright?” Jessie replied with a sigh. “It’s all set up, don’t make me do this again next week. Take off your hat.”

Ron scoffed. “This is bullshit!”

“What did you just…?” Jessie began but was cut off again.

“This is just you trying to talk to me!” Ron pointed out, revealing to her that he knew all along.

“There are things we need to talk about.” Jessie answered honestly. “There are things that you need to learn.”

“What, are you serious?” Ron questioned aggressively.

“What is it? Do you blame me? Huh? Do you actually blame me?” Jessie retorted, frustrated with his attitude since Pete’s execution. “Raise your left arm above your head. You can’t. Tell me why.”

“No.” Ron refused, not wanting to think about it.

It was well known to both of them that after one particularly violent night at the hands of Pete, Ron had been injured so badly that his left arm couldn’t be raised over his head. To his credit, when sober and calm, Pete had tried to fix the damage he had done to his son but even his surgical skills couldn’t undo the damage. Jessie was shocked that Ron could be so upset over his father’s death considering everything they had all been through.

“Your father was dangerous.” Jessie continued.

“Rick _is_ dangerous!” Ron countered angrily. He hated the man who had killed his father.

“Rick doesn’t have anything to do with this!” Jessie countered quickly. Nothing Rick did or was would change the monster Pete had been.

Ron shook his head, feeling betrayed. “What? Is he your friend?”

“Yeah.” Jessie answered softly. “He’s my friend.”

Ron dropped his arms to his sides and stormed out of the house, slamming the door behind him. Jessie sighed as she watched him go. It was going to take a while to get through to him.

 

Daryl continued to slowly drive down the road on his motorcycle. He had finally reached the point of intersection between the two roads. Sasha and Abraham’s car pulled out from the corner of the road and started slowly driving beside him. Behind them, the army of rotting corpses followed them relentlessly, the sheer size of the horde covering the road for miles behind them. Whenever the wind would change direction, the smell would be eye wateringly unbearable.

Rick was crouched on top of the RV as he watched the approaching herd lead by Daryl, Sasha and Abraham. They were approaching very slowly as they had to keep the herd’s attention but it wouldn’t be long before they reached the barricade. He pulled out his radio to make sure the plan was progressing the way they wanted it to.

“Glenn, you have to hurry.” Rick spoke over the radio. “The noise could distract the herd right off the road. Talk to me.”

“We’re here.” Glenn responded.

The walkers in the tractor place banged against the windows noisily while snarling and rasping at the three men outside. One of the walkers was trapped under a tractor that had been driven over the top of it and was the first to be killed by Glenn with a knife to the forehead. The three men rushed up to the windows to assess the situation. The original plan had been to come back with the whole group and clear it.

“Sounds like a lot.” Nicholas commented nervously.

“So, what’s the plan?” Heath asked them, also nervous.

“Take them out, a few at a time.” Glenn told them as he walked round to the front entrance.

He pulled on the front doors but they were locked. They could hear the walkers banging and growling on the other side. Glenn put down his bag and turned to Nicholas.

“Nicholas, you’re at the door.” He ordered.

Nicholas did as he was told and stood beside the door while Glenn rummaged in his bag for a crowbar.

“You let one or two out at a time and then you close it, that’s the trick.” Glenn told him, explaining the method. “That’s how we control it. Heath…”

“Hey wait, what if he can’t close it?” Heath asked, gesturing to the door.

“I’ll be able to.” Nicholas reassured, confident in his physical strength.

“We take them on.” Glenn answered.

“We take them on?” Heath questioned incredulously.

“If we get into trouble we go behind the building into the woods and we draw them away.” Glenn explained, his plan B already set.

Heath shook his head in disbelief. He didn’t trust Glenn’s judgement or his plan.

“Hey, you’ve been on a run since he got here.” Nicholas defended. “He knows what he’s doing. Me and Aiden? We didn’t.”

Heath sighed and nodded before pulling out his gun. “This was supposed to be a dress rehearsal.”

“I’m supposed to be delivering pizzas, man.” Glenn commented with a smile. Nothing happened like it was supposed to anymore.

“Daryl’s leading them this way and they’re closing in.” Glenn argued. “That noise is going to pull the herd right off the road and then we’re gonna have serious trouble. We have to do this.”

Heath nodded, realising they didn’t have a choice. “Yeah. Okay.”

“Okay?” Glenn confirmed.

“Okay.” Heath repeated and aimed at the door with his knife in his hand.

“Okay.” Glenn repeated and made his way to the door.

Nicholas held the door shut while Glenn slipped the edge of the crowbar in between the doors and started using it to break it open. He knew it wouldn’t take much effort to break open those doors.

“On three. Ready?” Glenn asked them. “One. Two. Three!”

On the count of three, Glenn forced the door open as Nicholas pulled it open, preparing to close it again. Glenn froze on the spot. Behind the door was a metal shutter. The walkers couldn’t get out that way. They could be heard banging on the metal from the other side.

“Shit…” Glenn remarked. His original plan was useless.

Nicholas was confused by the reactions of Glenn and Heath so he stepped away from the door to see for himself. As soon as he saw the metal shutter he sighed. Nothing was ever simple in the world. The walkers continued to bang on the metal and the glass. They were running out of time.

 

Carl walked down the street as he pushed Judith in her pram. He knew Jason wouldn’t be gone too long as he was simply showing respect to Aaron and Eric. However, he couldn’t shake the sense of loneliness he felt whenever they were apart. It was amplified by the scare he got when Jason had been injured. With almost everyone out on the practice run for the following day, the community was even quieter than usual.

Carl glanced over at the lake and spotted Enid and Ron sitting together. Ron was clearly upset and was opening up to his girlfriend about everything that was bothering him. It reminded Carl of the night Jason was injured and he had spent time with her too. He recalled her blunt attitude towards Jason’s chances of living and found himself angered by her lack of faith in him.

“Carl?” Gabriel’s voice sounded from behind him.

Carl sighed and turned to the man. “What?”

“You heard what I told Deanna about your group, about Jason.” Gabriel stated, knowing that was the reason for the animosity Carl now had for him.

“What do you want?” Carl questioned, wondering if he should have let Jason beat Gabriel to death before.

“It was about me. Not you or your group. I know that now.” Gabriel confessed. His guilt had driven him to do and say all the things that he had. “I wanna help. You tried to teach me back at my church but I’m ready to learn now.”

Carl sighed. All the pain he had caused had just been from his own cowardice and inability to take responsibility for what he had done. Now the man who had tried to get his boyfriend exiled along with the rest of his group was asking for help.

“I think you need to tell everybody.” Carl hissed, he wanted everyone to know Gabriel had lied. “Especially Jason.”

“Yeah, I think you’re right.” Gabriel replied with a gentle smirk. He would have to earn forgiveness.

Carl turned and started walking away before sighing. “Come by around three, we’ll start with the machete.”

Gabriel smiled, grateful that Carl was willing to give him the lessons and honour his request regardless of what he had done. It further compounded how wrong he had been to say the group was dangerous or evil.

Carl watched Ron and Enid as Ron pulled the enigmatic girl into a tight hug. Enid returned the hug gently but didn’t seem to care much for it. She and Carl locked eyes as he walked past. There were things she had to tell him after Jason’s choice of words that morning.

 

Rick, Michonne and Morgan could hear the constant revving of Daryl’s motorcycle as he slowly but surely approached the barricade. The increasingly loud chorus of undead groans and rasps only a few feet behind him as the hungry herd gradually followed him. The wind was blowing in different directions, sometimes allowing the sickening stench of the corpses to reach them.

The three of them started firing their flares into the air. These flares would keep the attention of the herd as it turned right to continue down the road. Not all of the walkers would hear the motorcycle so the bright flares would hold their attention long enough for them to make the turn and continue following the rest.

Daryl and Sasha were making sure to drive even slower than before. The closer the herd was to them then the more attention they would draw to the herd. They needed all the walkers to follow them through the turn as it was a tricky part of the plan. They were also conscious of what could happen if the barricade came down somehow. Rick, Michonne and Morgan wouldn’t stand a chance.

They drove their vehicles round the corner as slowly as possible while the others continued to fire flares into the sky. Daryl stayed slightly ahead of the car for safety but constantly revved his engine as loudly as he could to keep their attention. The walkers snarled and rasped loudly as they shambled into the corner in pursuit of the two vehicles. Once the herd reached the blockade the walkers started slamming loudly against the metal walls as they made their way round the corner.

The banging of the metal helped to draw the attention of the walkers behind them as the flares and motorcycle continued to attract them. Michonne glanced through the small gaps between the wall panels and watched the rotting corpses slam against the metal as they all marched past. The sound of their groans was almost deafening and the stench was overwhelming. It was literally over a thousand rotting corpses that they could smell and see stumbling past them.

The congregation of the horde at the turning point was so thick and powerful that several of the walkers were slammed against the wall. They hit the wall with so much force from all the momentum that their heads split open on impact. The other walkers continued on, stepping over the fallen bodies of their brethren while others slid along the metal. One thing that was fortunately clear to everyone there was that the plan was working. They had successfully turned the herd onto the road and the hungry corpses were continuing to follow Daryl and Sasha.

 

Jason knocked on the door and waited for an answer. He didn’t even know if Aaron and Eric were home but considering they weren’t part of the herding run they had to be close by. After a few more seconds the front door opened to reveal Aaron.

“Jason!” Aaron exclaimed, Jason’s face wasn’t the one he had been expected. “Good morning.”

“Morning.” Jason greeted with a smile. “I hope I’m not interrupting anything.”

Aaron looked back at Eric who was sitting at their dining table. “No, no. We were just having breakfast. You can join us, if you like.”

“Oh, no thanks.” Jason responded with a polite raise of his hand. “I’ve already eaten and I wouldn’t want to intrude.”

“You knocked on the door and I have just invited you in.” Aaron replied with a smirk. “That’s not intruding.”

Jason smiled back. “I know but Carl’s waiting for me so I can’t stay.”

“Oh, okay.” Aaron relaxed. “So…”

“So, I wanted to thank you for letting me use those supplies.” Jason explained, tilting his head so he could see Eric at the table. “It was a big help and um…we had a great night.”

Aaron glanced back at Eric who was grinning mischievously before he turned back to Jason. “We’re glad to hear it. If you need anything else, you know where to find us.”

“Thanks.” Jason nodded. “I’ll let you get back to breakfast.”

“Take care and we’ll see you later.” Aaron replied as he prepared to close the door.

“You too.” Jason answered before turning and heading down the stairs and back onto the street as Aaron closed the door behind him.

 

The walkers banged on the windows as they eyed their prey. The three men looked on nervously as the corpses continued to bang on the dust covered glass.

“This is a bad idea.” Heath commented nervously.

“This is the only idea.” Glenn retorted with a frustrated sigh.

“I think there’s something like a dozen in there.” Nicholas commented, moving his head around as he tried to count them.

“We stay back, we get on opposite ends, and we draw them to each of us.” Glenn told them, laying out the only plan he had.

“So we take down four each?” Nicholas asked, wanting to make sure he knew what he was about to get into.

“No. This is just me and Heath.” Glenn retorted, not trusting Nicholas with walkers after Noah. “You get back and you stay back. If things go south you tell Rick then you draw them away.”

Nicholas looked down at the radio that Glenn had just handed to him. It wasn’t fair and was placing an unnecessary risk on Glenn and Heath by not allowing him to help. He was about to stutter out an argument but was cut off before he could get the first word out.

“Move back!” Glenn barked, pointing in the direction he wanted Nicholas to go.

Nicholas sighed before doing as he was told, taking one last look at the corpses pounding on the glass.

Glenn pulled out his handgun as he stared at the glass. “You ready?”

“No, but since you’re doing this thing anyway…” Heath replied, aiming his own gun.

“Alright.” Glenn responded and shot the glass.

The window smashed loudly with large chunks of glass crashing to the ground. Immediately the walkers started stumbling out to meet them. The first three were quickly shot in the head by Glenn and Heath as the other walkers made their way through the open window. The two men continued firing at the approaching corpses, though it was clear there was a little over a dozen of them inside the store.

“Still coming.” Heath commented as he shot two more.

Glenn’s handgun clicked as he ran out of ammo. Heath dropped his gun as one of the walkers grabbed hold of him, forcing him to wrestle with it so it wouldn’t bite him. Glenn successfully and rapidly reloaded his gun before pushing the closest walker out of the way so he could shoot it in the head. The next walker was too close and managed to grab hold of him but the experienced survivor angled his gun up and fired twice, one bullet striking the walker’s chin and the second killing it.

Heath continued with the same walker, unable to force it off of him without risking getting bitten. The other walkers were closing in on him which meant he was running out of time. Suddenly, Nicholas rushed up behind the walker and stabbed it in the back of the head with his knife, saving Heath. He turned around in time to grab hold of the next walker as it latched onto him. Glenn quickly shot another walker before saving Nicholas by killing the walker that had a hold of him. Nicholas let the corpse drop to the ground and nodded gratefully to Glenn as Heath stabbed the second last walker in the head.

Glenn stared at Nicholas. He had done the opposite of what he had been told, he had disobeyed Glenn when he had promised he wouldn’t. However, by doing so he had saved Heath from being bitten and had proven he was no longer afraid of getting close to the walkers to kill them. The final walker snarled at them as it shambled closer.

“Get it.” Glenn told him after sharing a look with the curly haired man.

Nicholas nodded and made his way up to the final undead monstrosity and quickly stabbed it in the head before it could react. The corpse collapsed to the floor as the men shared another look. Glenn was pleased to see that Nicholas was finally learning.

“Good.” Glenn told the two men as he holstered his gun. “Let’s go.”

Glenn picked up his bag before the three of them started jogging towards the meeting point. They had to stay ahead of the herd for the plan to work.

 

Maggie led Deanna out into one of the extensions to the community. Construction of the wall around it hadn’t been completed yet but that didn’t stop them from getting some work done. Maggie stood with a shovel in each hand.

“We’ve still got some panels to put up but we don’t have to wait to start growing things.” Maggie told her, her farming knowledge proving useful again. “There will be some sore backs and tired feet, that’s how you know you put in a hard day’s work.”

Maggie pulled out a small packet from her back pocket and handed it to Deanna. Deanna studied the packet. They were tomato plant seeds, sold in bulk in these packets along with other kinds of seeds, all from the same producer.

“They found crates of these at a nursery just a few miles out.” Maggie explained. “Tomatoes, carrots, you name it. We can plant them right here. Just need to finish the expansion and the wall needs to go up.”

Maggie and Deanna looked around them. They were outside the walls and Deanna admittedly felt rather exposed. The younger woman had assured her that nothing would happen and had come armed just in case.

“Reg wanted this community to grow. You did too.” Maggie told the older woman. “Has that changed? Everyone that’s here is here because of you. You need to show them you’re still here.”

Maggie handed Deanna one of the shovels. It was time to get to work and make things happen. Often the best way to deal with grief was to keep busy, Maggie had found that it worked for her so she was hoping it would work for Deanna too.

 

As Sasha drove them slowly down the road, Abraham looked at the wing mirror to spot some walkers that were leaving the herd to go into the woods. He couldn’t see what was causing them to change direction but he knew he had to get them back on track.

“What is it?” Sasha asked, noticing the ginger haired man looking back.

“There’s some lucky loos taking a little constitutional off the shoulder.” Abraham answered. “They’re starting a damn walk-out.”

“Do you want to have Daryl circle back?” Sasha suggested.

“No, keep moving.” Abraham told her as he grabbed his M16 and opened the car door. “I’ll catch up.”

“Abraham!” Sasha shouted as the large soldier stepped out of the moving car and slammed the door behind him.

Sasha looked back to watch him rush to the side of the approaching super herd of walkers.

“Idiot.” She muttered to herself.

Abraham entered the woods and smacked one of the walkers with his gun to get their attention. He dashed past the shambling corpses and grabbed an emergency blanket which he started waving around to get their attention. She could hear him barking profanities at the walkers as he rushed back onto the road.

“This is my ride, asshole!” Abraham roared as he smacked another walker to the floor before rushing back to the car.

Abraham opened the door and quickly jumped back into the car, placing the blanket on the floor and his M16 by his side. He pulled down the visor to check himself in the mirror and smiled as he saw the walker blood on his face.

“Well, look at me.” He commented with a laugh. “You didn’t see Reg, the night he got hit? That was a mess.”

Sasha remained silent, unsure of where Abraham was going with the conversation.

“Then Pete. His face just blowing up like Pompeii, right when we were cheek to cheek.” Abraham continued with another laugh. “I still think I’ve got some of his brains in my ear.”

Abraham laughed at his own comment and scratched his ear as if looking for the left over brain matter. He then checked the rear view mirror to make sure the herd was following them properly. All the walkers were marching in the right direction.

“Well, look at that. Alright.” Abraham commented, getting his breath back. “Everything is aces again.”

Sasha readjusted the mirror. “The hell are you doing?”

“I’m just grabbing the bull by the nutsack.” Abraham replied with a smirk. “I’m living, darling. Just like you.”

 

Jason walked down the street with his hands in his pockets. He had spotted Carl near the lake so he just had to round a corner to find him. As he made his way down the street he noticed Father Gabriel approaching him from the other direction. Jason sighed and kept looking straight ahead, trying his best to ignore the man and pretend he didn’t exist.

“Jason?” Gabriel began once the distance had closed between them.

Jason didn’t respond and kept walking, so Gabriel side stepped so he was in his way. “Jason.”

Jason continued to march forward, forcefully shouldering Gabriel out of the way. He may have been in a good mood but after the venomous things the priest had said to him before he wanted nothing more than to kill him. He knew it would be an overreaction so the sooner he was out of sight the better.

“Jason, please.” Gabriel pleaded, following him. “I already spoke to Carl.”

Jason stopped walking and glared at the priest over his shoulder. “I thought we told you not to come near us.”

“You did but I want to say that I’m sorry.” Gabriel explained nervously. “The things I said about your group, about you…it was because I was scared. I know that now.”

Jason turned around completely and walked a few steps closer. “You were scared? You’ve got a strange way of showing fear.”

“I was afraid that you or your group would tell Deanna what I did to my flock.” Gabriel explained lowly. “I was afraid I would be exiled.”

“So you tried to have us thrown out before we could say anything?” Jason filled in the gaps with a scowl.

“It was wrong and you have every reason to hate me.” Gabriel replied, his legs shaking. “I’m truly sorry.”

“Sorry is just a word.” Jason countered sharply.

Gabriel recoiled, not knowing what to say as it appeared he couldn’t say anything to Jason that would put things right. Jason himself was torn on what to think. He still despised the priest but he knew Kellin would have given him a second chance and Harry would have too. If Gabriel had already spoken to Carl then it probably meant that he had been given a second chance by him, leaving Jason very little choice.

Jason sighed. “When you brought the walkers back to your church, I was going to leave you out there but Carl wanted to save you. And the other day? I would have beaten you to death if not for Carl.”

Gabriel swallowed thickly, knowing fine well how easy it would be for Jason to kill him or simply not save him.

“So you owe your life to Carl.” Jason continued.

“I owe my life to all of you.” Gabriel interrupted him.

“No. When we first heard you screaming for help it was Carl who wanted to save you.” Jason explained with a shake of his head. “Carl has saved your life three times now. So if you ever hurt him again, I’ll kill you and leave you to turn. Understood?”

Gabriel nodded anxiously. He knew Jason would carry out that threat without any hesitation if given a good enough excuse.

“Like I said, sorry is just a word.” Jason continued sternly. “Prove you’re sorry. I’ll never forget what you did but I will forgive you if you earn that forgiveness.”

Gabriel swallowed and nodded his head tentatively. “Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me yet.” Jason retorted before turning and walking away from him.

 

The walker herd continued to slowly march down the road, all of the corpses were snarling and rasping as they went. The smell of putrid flesh was nauseating. Glenn, Heath and Nicholas ran through the woods to meet up with the others for the next stage of the plan. A whistle caught their attention as Rick, Michonne and Morgan came into view. They all walked together and joined Carter and his small group. They all stood together and watched as the herd marched past them, completely ignorant to their presence.

“It’s working.” Carter commented as the walkers shambled past the yellow balloons. “You were right.”

Carter extended his hand out to Rick for it to be shaken, thoroughly impressed with Rick’s planning. Rick shook his hand, appreciating the sentiment and taking it as an apology for his previous doubts.

“Everyone, we need to finish this.” Rick told them. “We need to keep moving and fan out down that thing, front to back. Like we said, cops at a parade. Glenn, you take the back, you got the other walkie.”

“Got it.” Glenn nodded.

“If they get sloppy we fire our weapons and pull them back on track.” Rick reminded them.

“I’ll hit the front.” Carter told him before jogging ahead.

“Okay. One after the other.” Rick responded.

They all split up, either heading for the back of the herd or the front. They would continue as planned with this next part of the plan being one of the easier parts. The herd itself was an impressive sight, as captivating as it was dangerous. The stench was overwhelming and the noise was deafening.

Carter jogged through the woods. He needed to get ahead of the herd and meet up with Tobin and the others who were further down the road. He was so focused on the herd to his left that he didn’t notice the walker stuck to a tree on his right. The walker’s arm shot out and grabbed him by his shirt collar before pulling him towards it. Carter tensed up and panicked, his lack of defensive reaction giving the walker all the time it needed to bite him.

The walker sank its teeth into his right cheek, Carter screamed as the monster’s rotting teeth ripped through the flesh of his face before pulling back to rip a chunk clean out. Blood spurted out of the bite wound on Carter’s face as he continued to cry out in horror and pain. The walker bit down again, tearing his face open even more. All of his screams were distracting some of the walkers in the herd, causing them to enter the treeline.

“Tobin, they’re breaking off.” Rick spoke over the radio as he rushed after Carter.

“What do you want us to do?” Tobin asked on the other end.

“Fire your guns and draw them back.” Rick ordered before clipping the radio back onto his belt.

Rick pulled out his knife and ran towards the source of the screams. As soon as he saw Carter he rushed towards him and grabbed hold of his shoulders, pulling him away from the walker’s grasp and tossing him to the ground. The walker reached for Rick but he grabbed its arm and stabbed its head, killing it instantly.

Carter clutched his face and continued to scream in agony and horror. He was going to die, he knew there was no way back and it terrified him. The walkers on the road could still hear his screams and were drawing closer. Rick crouched down and tried to calm him.

“Take a deep breath. Carter.” Rick told him, conscious of the walker herd’s approach. “Be quiet. You gotta be quiet.”

Rick tried to gag him but Carter wouldn’t let go of his face, preventing Rick from doing so. The injured man continued to wail and cry loudly, totally ignoring Rick’s pleas to remain silent. Rick knew there was no other way to silence him. He turned Carter’s head and stabbed him in the base of his skull, killing him instantly and silencing him forever. He pulled his knife out just as Morgan and Michonne caught up. The sound of distant gunfire could be heard.

“It’s working, the sound of the gunfire is bringing them back onto the road.” Tobin told them through the radio.

Rick pulled out his radio, watching as the walkers returned to the road. “You got it, Tobin.”

“Copy that.” Tobin replied. “What was that screaming?”

“It was Carter. He got bit, right in the face.” Rick answered honestly. “I stopped him.”

Rick sheathed his knife and clipped the radio back onto his belt. He picked up Carter’s shotgun and walked up to Morgan and Michonne who both stood silently over Carter’s dead body.

“We have a good hour until we have them at Green where we hand them off to Daryl, Sasha and Abraham.” Rick explained to Morgan. “Why don’t you head back and tell everyone what’s happening, they should know.”

“Okay, but Rick, I just…” Morgan began but Rick cut him off.

“Will you do that for me?” Rick asked sternly.

Morgan nodded as a walker stumbled through the foliage from deeper into the woods.

“I’ll take care of that one.” Rick told them. “Michonne, you take point.”

Rick pulled out his knife and headed straight for the stray walker.

“I know it’s how it is, I do.” Morgan told her. He couldn’t help but think about Rick’s prediction. He had been right.

“Yeah.” Michonne replied with a sigh. “I do too.”

Behind them, Rick stabbed the walker in the head while the herd on the road continued its slow march past.

 

Carol stood in the kitchen as she added some seasoning to the casserole she was making. She wasn’t sure how it would turn out but she had to experiment with the food that they had. As she was about to lift the tray and place it in the oven she heard the front door open. Jason and Carl stepped inside with Carl carrying Judith in his arms.

“Hey, boys.” Carol greeted as they walked past.

Carl didn’t stop to talk as Judith was asleep and he wanted to keep her that way so he immediately headed up the stairs. Jason stayed behind in the kitchen for a moment to examine what Carol had put together before it was cooked.

“That looks good.” Jason commented. “Another one of your creative recipes?”

Carol smiled and nodded as she placed the casserole in the oven, closing the door before she answered the teen. “Yeah, something new this time since we’re running low on the traditional ingredients.”

“You should write a book.” Jason joked with her. “ _Carol’s Guide To Cooking In The Apocalypse._ ”

Carol let out a light chuckle as she grabbed the timer and wound it back to the forty five minute mark. Jason drummed his fingers on the doorframe before heading up the stairs to join Carl. He met Carl on the landing just as he left Rick’s room where Judith slept. They smiled to each other before heading into their own room.

Carl flopped himself down on the bed while Jason stood by the window as he started to unzip his leather jacket. Movement outside caught his attention and made him narrow his eyes as he focused on the outside. He swore he could see dark figures climbing over the perimeter walls.

“Hey, Carl, do you see that?” He asked, his voice thick with apprehension.

Carl stood up and joined him at the window where they watched more and more people climb inside. Down by the front gate they could see one of the figures strike someone in the back with an axe, knocking them to the ground. Some others threw what they assumed to be Molotov cocktails, setting their unfortunate victims ablaze.

“We’re under attack!” Jason exclaimed as he marched over to the wardrobe.

He opened the wardrobe and grabbed the M4 assault rifle before tossing it over to Carl who caught it expertly. Jason grabbed his customised AKMSU and slung the gun strap over his shoulder. He checked that it was loaded and flicked the safety off before nodding to Carl. They were ready to fight.

Downstairs, as the timer ticked away, Carol walked over to the window and looked across the street. Standing on the grass outside of her house was Shelly Neudermeyer who was smoking a cigarette. Carol shook her head as she observed the woman who clearly hadn’t taken in her warning about smoking.

Suddenly, Shelly turned around and screamed before a large man hacked into her side with a machete. She hit the ground hard, blood pouring from her side as she looked up at the man, screaming and begging for him to spare her life. Without hesitation he swung the machete down into her forehead and killed her instantly. Carol rushed away from the window. They were under attack and someone had to defend the community.

 

Maggie and Deanna were outside digging the plots for the seeds when they heard the sudden screams erupting from inside the walls. They looked around but couldn’t see any signs of danger or excitement. The screams got louder and more frequent and were unmistakably screams of horror.

“Richards!” Deanna called to the man on watch. “What’s going on in there?”

Before he could answer, a Molotov cocktail struck the wall, causing him to turn around just in time for the second Molotov to strike him in the chest, igniting his entire body. Richards shrieked in pain as he fell off the wall. Maggie quickly pulled out her revolver and aimed at the wall as smoke billowed up from Richards’ dead body.

“Oh no!” Deanna gasped as Maggie rushed forward with her gun aimed.

She squinted as the smoke attacked her eyes, unable to get a clear shot of the men she could see and hear climbing over the walls and into the community. Deanna looked on horrified as Richards’ body continued to burn in front of her, quickly turning black as the smell of burning flesh filled the air.

“Come on!” Maggie yelled as she lowered her gun and started running for the main gate.

Deanna continued to stare at Richard’s body before she remembered how exposed she was and started running after Maggie.

 

Jason and Carl thundered down the stairs with their assault rifles in their hands as they found Carol at the base of the staircase. She also had her revolver ready in her hands and was ready for action. Outside, more men were flooding into the community with weapons.

“We saw them from upstairs!” Carl told her quickly. “They’re coming in from all over!”

“You two have to stay here and keep Judith safe!” Carol ordered as she ran for the door.

“Carol, I’m going with you!” Jason told her as he thundered down the last flight of stairs.

“No!” Carol retorted fiercely. “You stay here!”

Before Jason had the opportunity to respond she was already out the door, slamming it behind her. Jason cursed under his breath as he looked around the house, noticing that many of the windows were easy to see through from outside.

“Carl, we need to pull down the blinds and keep watching all the exits.” Jason told his boyfriend who immediately started pulling at the blinds. “No one gets inside this house without going through us!”

 

“I have to go find Ron!” Jessie told her youngest son, Sam, as she tried to make it down the stairs.

“Please, please don’t go!” Sam pleaded, refusing to let go of her hand.

“I’m gonna be right back.” Jessie assured him, knowing it wasn’t a guarantee. “Okay?”

Sam shook his head violently.

“You go put yourself in the closet and you close the latch just like I showed you.” Jessie told him, reiterating what she had told him when Pete would get violent.

Suddenly, one of the windows smashed downstairs as one of the attacking people entered the house. Jessie raised her finger to her lips to tell Sam to be quiet as she slowly ascended the staircase with him. They quickly made it to the closet and closed the door behind them, locking the latch on the inside. Jessie pulled out her gun and flicked the safety off, aiming it at the door as more smashes could be heard from downstairs.

 

Outside, the residents of Alexandria were running away from their attackers in a blind panic. Most of them were quickly caught by the armed group, either impaled with spears, stabbed with knives or sliced with machetes. The community was being rapidly slaughtered by a group with plenty of experience at ransacking communities and killing people.

Inside the house, Jason and Carl patrolled the building with their assault rifles at the ready. They didn’t speak as they needed to listen out for the slightest sign of intrusion. During an attack like this, every second was absolutely crucial and could be the difference between life and death.

The sound of keys in the lock of one of the doors got their attention immediately. The two teens communicated with hand gestures and nods as they centred in on the back door. There was a shadow against the glass, obscured by the blinds they had pulled down. Someone was trying to sneak in using the keys. Jason and Carl stood on either side of the small hallway, keeping their backs against the wall so they were behind cover, should the person behind the door have a gun.

Their movements were symmetric as the person outside the door found the right key and opened the door. As soon as the door opened the two teens whipped round and aimed their assault rifles together, seconds away from blasting away whoever it was. They froze their trigger fingers when they realised it was Enid.

“Hi?” Enid greeted them awkwardly, surprised to see two guns pointed at her.

“Why didn’t you just knock?” Carl questioned her as he rushed over and shut the door behind her.

“I have these.” Enid answered, handing Carl a collection of all the keys in Alexandria. “Didn’t want them to have them.”

Jason lowered his gun as he and Carl headed back through to the front room, followed by Enid who seemed far too relaxed for what was going on. Carl left the keys on the kitchen counter as he continued to look out the windows.

“And I wanted to say goodbye.” Enid continued, staring at Carl.

Jason couldn’t help the smirk that crossed his face. He wouldn’t miss her if she wanted to leave.

“Okay, watch the back door and tell us if you see them coming.” Carl told her, ignoring her.

“I’m not staying!” Enid tried to argue, walking further into the room.

“You’re not going anywhere!” Carl retorted firmly. “Sit down. You’re helping us protect Judith.”

As she followed Carl over to the most spacious patch of flooring in the room, Jason stopped to hand her a Springfield Armory TRP handgun. She took the gun hesitantly, the weight of it uncomfortable in her hands.

“I’ve never shot a gun before…” She told him, somewhat embarrassed by the revelation.

“Never?” Jason questioned incredulously. “Well, it’s simple. Point, pull, repeat.”

“So you want me around now?” Enid challenged Jason, referencing their morning argument. “I thought you wanted me to stay away?”

“Now is not the time for this, so lose the attitude.” Jason quickly scolded her. “There are bigger things happening right now than you and me.”

Jason raised his AKMSU again and continued to patrol the house. He felt slightly uncomfortable not having his machete sheathed on his belt so he ascended the stairs to get it from the bedroom. The upstairs windows would also give him a better vantage point.

Enid sighed and sat on the floor back to back with Carl. Carl knew better than to question the animosity between the two of them but going by his discussion about possessiveness with Jason, he figured it had something to do with that. He dropped the subject in his mind for the time being. He had to focus on defending the house.

“They’re not getting inside this house. We’re not gonna let them.” Carl told Enid. He was a child soldier again. “Did you see them?”

“They’re just people. This place is too big to protect, there are too many blind spots.” Enid told him as she accepted that the community was lost. “That’s how we were able to…”

“They got in the walls, they’re gonna die. All of them.” Carl told her. He would make sure of it himself if he had to. “Don’t tell me goodbye.”

Carl had just registered her desire to leave. He didn’t care if it was fuelled by whatever comments Jason had made to her, he saw her as his friend and a kindred spirit. Carl struggled to connect to any of the people in Alexandria but Enid had been one of the few. She could be blunt and introverted but she had been there for him when he had needed her. That meant a lot to him.

Enid sighed, she had already made up her mind. “Okay. I won’t.”

 

Carol ran through the community, trying to stay under cover as best she could. She watched as the men attacking rushed through and hacked at whoever got too close with a variety of bladed weapons. People were dying all around her. She hid in the bushes as she watched some people being taken away in chains while others were ruthlessly slaughtered. One bald attacker stabbed a corpse repeatedly before painting a W on his forehead with the fresh blood.

Carol continued to move through the community. She had to find a way to tackle the threat as she stood out too much in her flower pattern jumper. She had to find a way to gain the upper hand on these attackers in the fastest way possible. She kept her revolver in her hands as she observed another one of the attackers cutting the limbs off a corpse with an axe. These people, whoever they were, were deranged.

Carol made her way to Erin’s house and peeked round the corner. Just by the porch, Erin was cornered by one of the men while she pleaded for her life. Carol holstered her revolver and unsheathed her knife before rushing round the corner. The man, dressed in a hooded overcoat with a brown rag covering his face, slashed at Erin’s abdomen with a sickle. Erin shrieked in agony as she collapsed to the ground just as Carol reached the man and stabbed him in the side before pulling his head back and stabbing him in the head as well.

Carol dumped his body on the ground and rushed over to Erin. She sat on the steps of the porch and cradled the terrified woman as she bled profusely from her slashed abdomen. Looking at the injury made Carol realise that she would die no matter what was done in an effort to save her. Carol tried to calm her down and sooth her as best she could while gagging her before sneaking her knife behind Erin’s head. She stabbed the taller woman in the back of the head to put her out of her misery and avoid reanimation. Carol let Erin’s body fall limp on the steps as rage consumed her. These W men, the Wolves, would all die by her hand.

 

Up in the guard tower, Spencer panicked as he tried to select a target. There were Wolves everywhere and most of them were running around almost non-stop. He couldn’t get a clear shot. His aim wasn’t the best and it was even worse when he was in a panicked state, his hands shaking under the weight of the rifle.

He aimed at one of the Wolves who was carving a W into the forehead of a dead resident but the man looked up and ran just as Spencer pulled the trigger. The young man cursed as he missed and tried aiming again, watching as the chaos unfolded below. It was a living nightmare in the streets of Alexandria.

Spencer watched through his scope as one of the Wolves ducked Holly’s attack and stabbed her in the side with his blade. As soon as he did, Rosita shot him through the head before rushing up to Holly who now lay on the ground bleeding. Aaron joined her and they both worked together to lift Holly up and rush her towards the infirmary.

Suddenly, the unmistakable sound of a truck reached his ears. Spencer rushed to the other side of the tower and saw a large eighteen wheeler truck speeding towards the main gate. On the side of the truck was the logo for Del Arno Foods. Spencer shot wildly at the windscreen, trying desperately to shoot the driver before he made it to the gate.

The truck suddenly veered to the right, slamming through one of the burnt out buildings before striking the base of the guard tower and finally came to a halt when it slammed against the wall. The impact with the wall set off the truck’s horn, the deafening sound echoing for miles around.

 

Rick and Michonne walked through the foliage, keeping a close eye on the walker herd. Michonne was carrying Carter’s shotgun and made sure to stay alert. It was easy to get caught by surprise in the dense woodland. Rick was close behind her and was pleased that the plan was working out almost perfectly. They just had to spend the next hour avoiding any complications.

Suddenly a loud horn sounded around them. It was extremely loud and made them all jump from the sudden nature of it. The sound continued relentlessly, constantly echoing around them and distracting the herd.

“What the hell is happening?” Heath wondered aloud.

“I don’t know.” Glenn replied. “Sounds like a horn or something. It’s pulling the back half off the road. Oh God…”

They all started to scatter to avoid the incoming walker herd that was now heading for the source of the horn instead of following the parade.

“Whatever that is, it’s far.” Michonne commented to Rick. “It sounds like it’s coming from…”

“Home.” Rick finished her sentence with equal shock. Something was happening back in Alexandria.

The two of them took off running as more walkers came their way. They had to get back to the community and find a way to stop the horn before it led half the massive herd straight to their gates. Even half of the herd would be enough to decimate the community if they weren’t prepared.

 

The truck’s horn was painfully loud and agonisingly irritating with how constant it was. Spencer had managed to make it down to the ground level of the damaged guard tower and tried to open the door. Wooden panels and debris had fallen in front of the door, blocking him in and forcing him to struggle by shoulder barging the door. He needed to get out of the tower and turn the horn off.

 

Glenn knocked a low hanging branch out of his way as he ran through the woods as fast as he could. Just behind him were the other members of the group that had been controlling the back half of the super herd, Rick, Michonne, Heath, Nicholas, Scott, Annie, Sturgess, David and Barnes. They had to keep themselves moving as the massive herd was right behind them, drawn by the loud and constantly blaring horn in the distance.

Glenn and Rick stopped for a moment to catch their breath and let the others catch up to them. The speed they had been running at meant they could afford to spend a couple minutes recuperating.

“Try again.” Glenn told the other man who had the walkie-talkie in his hand.

“Tobin, it’s not stopping! Light it up, you hear me?” Rick ordered but a loud static hiss was the only response. “Tobin!”

The snarl of a walker approached them reminded them they were far from safe and had to keep moving.

“Michonne.” Rick called as he and Glenn ran ahead.

“Got it.” The samurai replied before slicing the walker’s head in two and running behind them.

“Shit! Shit! It was half!” Sturgess, the community’s gardener, cried. “Jesus, it was more than half!”

“We’ve just gotta stay ahead of them!” Annie told him as they all kept running. “They walk, we run!”

“Rick?” Daryl’s voice called down the walkie-talkie.

“I’m here!” Rick answered as he sprinted at full speed.

“What’s going on back there?” Daryl questioned, concerned.

“Half of them broke off, they’re going towards Alexandria.” Rick explained between pants of breath.

“Towards you?” Abraham questioned down the radio, worried for their safety given the size of the herd.

“We ran ahead but there’s a horn or something, loud, coming from the east!” Rick explained to them as they were too far away to hear it. “It’s not stopping!”

“I’mma gas it up and come back.” Daryl suggested down the radio.

“Dammit, you keep going!” Rick responded stressfully.

“They’re gonna need our help!” Daryl argued.

“Gotta get the herd moving!” Rick shouted down the radio as he ran, sweat pouring down him.

“Not if shit’s going down, we don’t!” Daryl retorted in frustration.

“The risk that herd turns around makes the bad back there worse!” Rick stated. If the whole herd headed for Alexandria it would be the end. “Daryl!”

“Yeah, I heard you.” Daryl replied with a sigh. He wanted to help, not be a shepherd to corpses.

As the group continued sprinting through the woodland to get away from the approaching walker herd, Annie fell on her front after tripping over a hard, curved root. The others looked out for danger as Glenn helped her back to her feet.

“You okay?” He asked as he helped her up.

“It’s my ankle.” Annie replied as she cringed in pain.

Glenn lifted her arm over his shoulders and helped support her weight as they moved together. They couldn’t stop for any reason, not with such a large herd behind them. They did their best to move as fast as possible, despite Annie mostly being on one foot.

“It’s coming from back home.” Heath commented about the horn. “It has to be.”

“He did this. He brought us all out here to die!” Barnes complained, referring to Rick. “He killed Carter…”

“Carter was dead already!” Michonne cut him off angrily. It was not the time for an illogical mutiny.

“Now they’re in trouble back there and we’re done!” Barnes continued. “We’re as good as dead!”

“Hey! Calm down!” Michonne ordered him with a loud whisper, understanding that he was being irrational because of fear.

“What the hell are you talking about?” Barnes argued. “We are done! And it’s cause of him!”

“Shut up and move!” Michonne demanded aggressively, losing her patience rapidly. “Come on!”

Barnes glared at her before doing as he was told, running ahead of them to re-join the group. Heath glared at Michonne, wondering if Barnes had a point about Rick. He relented when Michonne answered his glare with a scowl of her own before they both rushed to join the others.

“Alright, listen up! Here’s the new plan.” Rick told them, thinking on the spot. “I go back, get the RV and circle around the woods on Redding. I’ll get in front of them before they get there, I can lead them away again.”

“RV’s a mile back.” David suggested. “I’ll go with you.”

“I’ll handle it, just get home. They might need you there.” Rick replied, appreciating the offer. “Glenn, Michonne.”

Rick led his two trusted friends away from the group so that they could speak in private before they split up. They didn’t have much time before the herd would be on top of them again.

“If something’s in front of you, you kill it. No hiding. No waiting. You keep going.” Rick told them sternly.

“I’m going with you, you can’t do this on your own.” Glenn argued back.

“Glenn, I can do this.” Rick retorted.

“You need to help me.” Michonne added. “We gotta get these people back.”

“Yeah.” Rick agreed before being pragmatic. “Thing is, they aren’t all gonna make it.”

“Rick…” Michonne began but was cut off.

“You try to save them, you try.” Rick continued. “But if they can’t keep up, you keep going. You make it back, you have to. Make sure you get back.”

A sudden scream accompanied by a loud snarl interrupted their discussion. They rushed towards the source of the cry alongside the others to find Barnes lying on his back as a walker bit into his throat. The man continued to cry in agony as Rick used all his strength to rip the walker away from the injured man. Michonne quickly stabbed the monster in the forehead with her katana.

They all looked down at Barnes who was already starting to drown in his own blood. His throat had been ripped clean open and more blood was pouring into his windpipe than out of his neck because he was lying on his back. The Alexandrians looked on in horror, unsure of what to do. Michonne sighed and thrust her sword through Barnes’ forehead to end his suffering.

 

Jason came down the stairs with his machete in its sheath and strapped to his belt. He joined Carl and Enid in the front room and peered out the window through the blinds. The horn was deafening and constant, like it belonged to a truck. It just wouldn’t stop blaring around them.

“What is that?” Carl asked, standing up.

“Sounds like a truck’s horn or something.” Jason replied, watching as the carnage unfolded outside, smoke rising into the air. “Can’t see from here though.”

“We shouldn’t stay here.” Enid tried to convince them. “It isn’t safe.”

“What wouldn’t be safe is going out there right now.” Jason told her, turning round to face her. “As tough as you think you are, you wouldn’t make it twenty feet without one of those psychopaths taking you down.”

“I can take care of myself!” Enid argued angrily.

“Yeah, which is why your first instinct was to run away.” Jason retorted sarcastically.

“Both of you, enough!” Carl growled. “Now is not the time!”

Jason paced the room, drumming his fingers against the side of his AKMSU. He wanted to be out there fighting them. Relying on so few people wasn’t his style and he didn’t think it was fair. They were outnumbered and they needed to do more to defend the community and protect the residents. He had to find an excuse to go outside and take the fight to the Wolves.

 

Spencer finally managed to escape the guard tower and climbed over the debris to the truck’s cabin. His eardrums felt like they were going to burst from the sheer volume of the truck’s horn. When he opened the driver’s side door he recoiled at the sight of the reanimated driver who was crushed inside. The walker snarled at him as he nervously unsheathed his knife, unsure of how to tackle the walker without being bitten.

Suddenly, the passenger side door opened and Morgan stepped up into the cabin. He thrust his staff into the back of the walker’s head and killed it instantly. He pulled his staff out and pulled the walker back. As the corpse fell back one of its hands knocked the switch that controlled the horn, turning it off. Only then could Morgan hear the screams.

“What happened?” He asked Spencer, needing instant information and fast.

“Someone, a group, they got inside the walls.” Spencer explained, breathing heavily from adrenaline. “They’re killing people.”

“We need to get in there.” Morgan stated confidently to the now silent Spencer. “You coming?”

Spencer continued to breathe but didn’t answer. He hadn’t been much help in the tower and was convinced he’d be absolutely useless inside the walls on the ground with the Wolves. Morgan sensed his fear and understood what the answer was. He nodded slowly in disappointment.

“Hide.” Morgan told him before closing the cabin door.

 

Suddenly, the sound of the horn faded into silence. The only sounds around them were the natural noises of the forest but the disgusting stench of death was starting to waft through the air.

“The horn stopped. Good.” Rick commented as he crouched down to take Barnes’ supplies, a knife, gun and a food bar. “Get back safe.”

Rick stood up and walked away from them, heading for the location of the RV back at their reinforced intersection. He ignored the looks of horror from the Alexandrians who couldn’t fathom how he had so coldly raided Barnes’ body moments after death. There was no time to be sentimental, they had to get the herd back under control.  

 

Morgan ran into Alexandria through the open front gate. As soon as he ran in he saw more of the smoke rising into the air, the bodies on the ground and he could hear the screams as people ran for their lives. To his right, one of the Wolves stood over a body as he hacked the limbs off of it with an axe. He and Morgan stared at each other.

Another loud scream made Morgan look away. As soon as he did the large, bearded Wolf with the axe ran towards him but stopped as soon as Morgan brandished his staff. The bearded man could tell Morgan wasn’t like the others. He was a fighter and would require a different approach. The man paced back and forth in front of Morgan.

“Quick?” The man questioned gruffly, twirling his axe. “Or slow?”

“Leave.” Morgan pleaded. “Please.”

“Gonna be slow.” The man concluded.

The Wolf rushed towards Morgan with his axe in the air, ready to bring it down upon him as Morgan side stepped and prepared to deflect it with his staff. Suddenly, another man in a black overcoat rushed up to the Wolf and stabbed him in the side, mortally wounding him. The bearded man collapsed to the floor and dropped his axe. Morgan glared at the unknown man with suspicion until they pulled down the rag covering their face. It was Carol.

“I could have stopped him.” Morgan told her, angry at her for killing the man.

“Are the others back?” Carol asked as she crouched down by the body.

“No. It’s happening out there.” Morgan explained, referring to the herding plan.

“They’re doing it now?” Carol questioned incredulously. It was the worst possible timing.

“We had to.” Morgan told her as she painted a W on her forehead with blood.

“These people don’t have guns.” Carol stated as she unravelled the man’s chains.

“I could have stopped him.” Morgan repeated.

“If they had guns they’d be using them.” Carol continued, ignoring his pacifistic nonsense.

“Did you hear me?” Morgan questioned, irritated by her ignorance.

“We have to get to the armoury before they do.” Carol explained her plan. “If we keep moving, this might work.”

“You don’t have to kill people.” Morgan told her in a desperate attempt to get her to adopt his philosophy.

“Of course we do.” Carol spat back, not having the patience for it.

“Carol!” Morgan barked. “You don’t like it.”

It was true but it didn’t matter. Carol covered her face again. “I’m going to get to the armoury and I need your help!”

She stood up, holding out the chains. She was disguised as the first Wolf she had killed and using Morgan as a pretend prisoner would be the best way to just walk to the armoury undetected. Being part of the plan was not a choice for Morgan, it was an obligation.

 

Jason searched the kitchen drawers for some knives. He needed knives that were a decent size like carving knives. Unfortunately, there didn’t seem to be any in the regular places. It wasn’t a major concern, Carl had his M4, his Beretta and his knife while Jason had his AKMSU, his Operator and his machete.

He walked back through to the front room and peered out the window again. The chaos was continuing and it was only getting worse as the Wolves continued to kill more and more people as they were being met with very little resistance. Jason growled under his breath.

“At least the horn stopped.” Carl commented as he joined him by the window.

“Yeah, that’s something.” Jason remarked. “We’ve gone from listening to a horn to listening to the chorus of screams.”

Jason checked over his AKMSU before looking back out the window.

“I feel so pathetic, hiding in here.” Jason growled in frustration.

“We need to stay here and protect Judith.” Carl told him, knowing where Jason’s thoughts were going.

“No, you need to protect Judith.” Jason replied. “I should be out there helping.”

“I’m not letting you go out there.” Carl told him sternly. “I’m not letting you out of my sight.”

Jason sighed and closed his eyes, nodding in acceptance. They were in the Grimes household, so it was only fitting that he followed Carl’s rules in Rick’s absence.

 

The group walked through the woods, led by Michonne and Scott while the others followed. Glenn continued to assist Annie by supporting her as she limped along with them, the twist in her ankle quite severe. Around them there was nothing but silence, a good sign given the size of the herd behind them.

“We’re ahead of it, ten minutes, twenty minutes maybe.” Glenn told them, staying optimistic.

“We all keep up the pace, we all get back home.” Michonne added. Their only concern was getting back to Alexandria.

“So, if we don’t, that’s it, huh?” Heath questioned cynically.

“We don’t even know what’s waiting for us!” Sturgess whined in panic.

“It’s gonna be okay.” David responded. “We have walls for a reason.”

“That sound, maybe someone ploughed right through.” Sturgess continued, finding a problem to every solution. “Maybe we’re walking back to nothing!”

David hissed at him to shut up. “My wife’s back there.”

“Mine too.” Glenn added, sharing their concerns. “Look, don’t worry about what’s gone wrong, we’ll figure out a way to make this go right.”

“We’re moving in the same direction everything else is.” Scott finally joined the discussion. “We’re gonna catch up with something.”

“We’re gonna catch up with a lot of things and we’re gonna end them.” Michonne added. “We have no choice. We gotta keep going forward.”

 As the group slowly trudged through the woodland, they could hear the light snarls of nearby walkers. When they came into a more open area they discovered the source, several walkers stood like statues among the trees, waiting for something to get their attention. Glenn handed Annie over to Nicholas and placed his bag on the ground.

“Stay here.” He told the Alexandrians in a whisper. “Don’t shoot unless you have to.”

He pulled out his knife and ran towards the walkers along with Heath and Michonne. Glenn jumped on the closest one from behind and stabbed it in the top of its skull while Michonne sliced another’s head off. Heath used his knife to stab a third walker, the commotion attracting the attention of the other corpses in the area.

The other walkers turned and snarled loudly as they made their way towards the three survivors. The walkers failed in their attempts as each time they got close they received a knife to the head or Michonne’s sword to their face. The other members of the group watched on as the trio fought their way through the pack of walkers.

“Come on.” Scott said to David, unsheathing his knife. “That’s us.”

Scott and David advanced carefully towards the growling corpses and started to attack them, stabbing them in the foreheads, temples and under their chins to end their existence. As they fought the walkers, Sturgess backed himself up against a tree trunk and pulled out his Beretta in a blind panic. He fired two shots just as a walker grabbed him by the shoulders from behind. The first bullet missed the target and the second went straight through Scott’s lower leg, causing him to collapse to the ground in pain as a walker descended upon him.

The gunshots attracted the walkers, so Nicholas and Annie quickly fired at the approaching corpses and shot them all in the head. Sturgess rolled away from the walker on the ground and took off running into the foliage, disappearing rapidly despite the cries from Nicholas for him to stop. Nicholas was beginning to see how horrible he had been in the past as that was exactly what he used to do.

Glenn and Michonne continued to kill walkers swiftly while Scott struggled against two of them as he lay on the ground. David quickly came over and stabbed the one on top of him while Heath killed the one near his legs. Glenn grit his teeth as he realised what had happened to Scott. They may have killed the walker pack they had stumbled upon but Sturgess was gone and Scott could no longer walk. Things were getting harder, just like Rick said. They weren’t all going to make it.

As they contemplated how to deal with Scott’s injury, David let out a sudden scream as a walker they had missed grabbed onto his shoulders and bit into his shoulder blade. David hollered in pain and fear as he tried desperately to fight it off. He managed to push it back as he spun round before stabbing it in the temple. He clutched his shoulder with one hand as the others stared at him with grim expressions. Michonne checked his shoulder and found the bleeding bite wound. There was no way to save him from it. His fate was sealed.

“I know what it means.” David told them, looking back at all the grim faces. “We gotta keep moving, right?”

 

“Mum!” Spencer shouted as he spotted Maggie and Deanna running for the main gate.

“Oh God, Spencer!” Deanna gasped as she stopped and ran towards him. “Thank God.”

Maggie followed close behind as they both ran up to the young man who stood beside the truck that had crashed into the wall. He looked as equally terrified as Deanna did. Deanna embraced her son as Maggie joined them.

“We need to get inside!” Maggie exclaimed. They had to help.

“I can’t go in there. I don’t have a gun, I don’t know how to fight. If I go inside I’ll just be another person who’s gotta be saved.” Deanna explained, regretful that she didn’t let Jason teach her some things before. “The best thing I can do for everyone in there is to stay out here.”

Maggie realised that Deanna was right. She turned to Spencer. “Keep her safe.”

“I will.” Spencer replied before Maggie ran off towards the gate.

Spencer opened the driver’s side door of the truck so that Deanna could hide in there. She hesitated as she climbed in, spotting the corpse that lay slumped between the passenger seat and the floor, the stench of death already starting to waft through the cabin. Spencer closed the door behind her and stood guard while they both listened to the screams from those inside. Deanna felt terribly guilty. It was her fault they didn’t know how to fight back and were relying on the remaining members of Rick’s group to save them all.

 

The engine of Daryl’s motorbike roared loudly as he moved himself closer to the car that Sasha was driving. They had continued leading the front half of the herd as Rick wanted them to, the disgusting sea of death trickling behind them constantly.

“Hey!” Daryl called through the open window. “We gone five miles out yet?”

“Give or take some yardage.” Abraham answered. “You got a reason for asking?”

“Next intersection, I’m gonna spin around and go back.” Daryl explained.

“The plan is to go fifteen more.” Sasha argued, surprised by his sudden desire to abandon them.

“Yeah, I’m gonna change that.” Daryl countered. “The plan’s just gonna have to work.”

“The magic number is twenty. That’s the mission.” Abraham stated with military authority. “That’s making sure they’re off munching on infirm raccoons the rest of their rotten dead lives instead of any of us.”

“If you wanna go we can’t stop you.” Sasha added, gesturing to the herd. “But without you they could stop us.”

Daryl was torn between his two commitments. Rick had trusted him and instructed him with leading the massive herd away and if he abandoned Abraham and Sasha then he wouldn’t be able to help them. As he glanced at a sign advertising Alexandria he thought about the flip side. They had a car that could outrun the herd easily and their home was under attack from some dangerous group with half the herd on the way there as well. He had to help. He was a fighter, not a shepherd.

“Nah, I got faith in ya!” Daryl finally declared loudly as he sped ahead of them.

“Daryl!” Sasha shouted in shock.

“Don’t do it, man!” Abraham yelled after him, sticking his head out the window as the archer shot off down the road.

 

Ron pressed his back against a tree trunk as he tried to catch his breath, cursing with each gasp for air. He had been outside at the worst possible time and had been running away from the attackers since the whole thing started. He could hear screams all around him and could see chopped up bodies and burning bushes. The community was falling apart under the onslaught of this viscous group.

The sudden sound of a blade being unsheathed caught his attention. He glanced behind him to find one of the Wolves with a large knife in one hand. Ron’s blood ran cold as adrenaline shot through his system. He took off running as fast as he could, his arms flailing from the power he was using to force his body forward faster than the psychopath behind him. Another glance back told him that the man was gaining on him. He wasn’t going to get away this time.

A loud gunshot suddenly rang out from in front of him and he heard a cry of pain as the knife clattered onto the paving of the street. Ron curved his run as he slowed down to a stop and turned back to find the man writhing on the ground in agony, clutching his bleeding thigh that had received the bullet. Ron turned to the other side of the street where Carl came rushing out to join him with his M4 in his hands, still aiming at the man on the ground. Jason was close behind, looking out for more of the attackers.

The man on the ground raised his arm out. “Please, man, please don’t kill me, man, please!”

Carl wasn’t sure to make of the man’s begging as he slowly approached.

“Help me, please!” The man begged. “My leg!”

Carl glanced at Ron, unsure of how he felt about killing someone in front of his friend. He knew Ron didn’t understand how the world worked yet and this could cause a huge misunderstanding between them. The man on the ground took the opportunity and grabbed Carl’s leg before grabbing onto the gun, trying to pull it out of his hands. Carl struggled with the man who was surprisingly strong for his lean build.

All of a sudden Jason pulled out his TRP Operator handgun and shot the man in the temple, blood and brain matter spraying onto the grass near Ron’s feet. The man’s body fell limp as his hands let go of Carl’s gun. Jason holstered his handgun as he glared back at the two boys who were staring at him in shock, though for different reasons.

“All of these men die today.” Jason told them as he turned the safety back off on his AKMSU. “Every single one. No exceptions.”

Carl turned to Ron as he got his breath back from the brief struggle. “Go inside. We can keep you safe.”

Ron looked over at the house, his expression sour as he spotted Enid standing in the doorway. Enid looked back in surprise, not knowing what to say or do or how Ron would react. Ron turned back to Carl.

“No.” He growled and marched past Jason in the direction of his own house.

“Ron!” Carl called in concern but he was ignored.

“Head back inside and protect Judith.” Jason told him. “I’ll make sure Ron gets home safe.”

“No, I’m not letting…” Carl tried to argue but was cut off by Jason pressing his lips against his own.

Jason held the kiss forcefully for a few seconds, his eyes glaring daggers at Enid as she watched them kiss. He was sending a message. Carl was his. If she tried anything he would find a way to gut her and make it look like a Wolf did it.

Jason pulled out of the kiss and stared into Carl’s eyes. “I’ll be back. I promise.”

Before Carl could mount an argument, Jason had already started jogging after Ron. He didn’t really care much for the drunkard’s son but he owed it to Carl. Carl watched as Jason jogged off, knowing that the older teen was just using it as an excuse to throw himself onto the battlefield.

“Carl, come on!” Enid shouted from the open door.

Carl growled under his breath, his trust in Jason overpowering his anger as he ran up the steps and back into the house.

 

Michonne led the group onto a dirt path road. There were no signs of the living or the undead which meant they were safe to walk down it for the time being. Regardless of how safe it looked, she kept her sword ready while David beside her kept his shotgun in his hands. Behind them, Glenn helped support Annie while Heath and Nicholas helped support Scott. David continued to reach round and touch the bite under his shirt as they walked down the road in silence.

“Can I take a look?” Michonne asked, noticing his distress.

“Please.” David accepted. He needed to know how bad it was.

Michonne pulled down his shirt and jacket collars to take a look at the bite. The clothes he was wearing had helped prevent the bite from being too severe, with the bite not being very deep despite the area of the wound being caked in a mix of dried and fresh blood.

“Is it bad?” David asked. The worse it was the less time he had to live.

“It’s about what you’d expect.” Michonne answered vaguely. He was a dead man walking.

“Didn’t expect this.” David remarked, referring to everything going wrong.

Michonne watched as he rubbed his middle finger against the gold ring on his ring finger. He was married and was obviously thinking about his wife.

“How long you been married?” Michonne asked, genuinely curious.

“Three months. She wasn’t my wife from before.” David explained with a fond smile.

“How’d you meet?” Michonne continued, feeling increasingly sorry for him.

 “It was early on. Aaron found me, I was alone, lost everything, everyone, even lost myself.” David explained, shuddering at the memory. “I wasn’t crazy, I just gave up on being someone, an actual person. You know what I mean?”

Michonne grimaced in recollection. She had been the same. “I do.”

“We found Betsy on the way back to the community. She still saw me.” David continued. “After I thought I was dead and gone, she was my first friend then she was more, she made me more. Even better than how I used to be. But if I could make it back, I’d want to say goodbye. To tell her, finding her in all of this, that was everything.”

Michonne stared up at him, she understood how they had grown close. Though she hadn’t developed romantic feelings for anyone, Rick’s group had certainly had the same effect on her. She also understood why Jason and Carl were so close, considering how much both of them had lost.

“We need to stop and bandage him up.” Annie told them as she watched Scott limp along with the help of Nicholas and Heath.

“No, we keep moving.” Scott replied, still wincing in agony. “I’m okay.”

“You won’t be if we don’t stop your bleeding.” Annie argued, used to his stubbornness.

“We’ll find a place.” Glenn told them. “We can’t stop out in the open for too long. Come on.”

 

“I didn’t ask for your help!” Ron hissed as Jason finally caught up to him.

“Tough. You’re getting it anyway.” Jason retorted as he stepped over another mutilated body.

“I don’t need your help!” Ron continued to argue as screams echoed around them.

Jason kept his assault rifle ready for any incoming threats. “Yeah, because you were doing so well ten minutes ago.”

Ron growled under his breath, despising the attitude he was receiving from the older teen. Without warning, Jason grabbed Ron’s shoulder and pulled him back, knocking him on the ground. Ron was about to shout in anger but one of the Wolves shot right past where he had been standing after jumping out a window. Jason had seen the guy coming and had pulled Ron out the way.

The Wolf turned around and charged at Jason, his crazed expression giving way to sudden fear when he realised too late that Jason was armed. Jason squeezed the trigger of his AKMSU as the man tried to hack into him with a machete before he could fire. A burst of five bullets shot through the man’s chest and heart, knocking him back on the ground as the blood splatters rained down onto the street. Jason quickly walked over to the man’s corpse and shot him through the forehead to prevent reanimation.

Jason quickly looked around them but for the time being they hadn’t been noticed by any other invaders. He tilted his head as a silent request for Ron to keep moving as they continued down the street towards the Anderson household. When they reached the house, Jason grabbed Ron by the arm and pulled him to the side.

“We don’t know if your family is still alive.” Jason told him bluntly. “So whatever happens, you do as exactly as I say, you got that?”

“I don’t have to do anything for you.” Ron spat back.

“It isn’t for me. I couldn’t give a shit if you died right now.” Jason barked back. “It’s for your family. It’s for you. It’s all about staying alive. Do as I say.”

Ron raised his arms in exasperation. “Fine! So what do you want me to do?”

Jason ignored his rude tone for a moment. “You knock on the door and call on your mum. If no one answers you stand back and leave it to me. Got it?”

Ron nodded half-heartedly. “Sure, whatever.”

“Repeat it back to me.” Jason hissed to make sure.

“I knock on the door, if there’s no answer I leave it to you.” Ron replied with a bored tone.

Jason nodded and kept his assault rifle ready as he and Ron ascended the steps and onto the porch.

 

Jessie sat in the closet with Sam as they silently waited for the Wolf to leave. She continued to aim her gun at the door just in case, her whole body tensing up as the intruder walked right past the door unsuspectingly. Jessie hoped that if they waited long enough the intruder would head back outside and get killed by one of the people fighting back.

“Mum!” Ron’s voice sounded from the front door downstairs. “Mum, are you in there?”

Jessie felt panic grip her as the intruder thundered down the stairs after Ron. She couldn’t let her oldest son get killed by the psychopath inside their home so she unlatched the door and opened it.

“Lock it.” She told Sam who looked at her in terror. “Be brave.”

Jessie closed the door behind her and quietly made her way downstairs.

 

“Okay, you tried.” Jason told the younger teen. “Now you’re coming back to the house with me.”

“I’m not going anywhere with you!” Ron argued. “You think you’re better than us?”

Jason looked around before answering. “Is that what you think this is about?”

“Just cause Rick shot my dad doesn’t put you in charge!” Ron hissed angrily. “He had no right and neither do you!”

“Your father was an alcoholic bastard who beat your family and killed Reg.” Jason spat back, finally losing his patience. “He deserved what he got and then some.”

Ron’s face flared with rage as he swung a punch at Jason. The older, more experienced teen saw it coming and ducked the attack with ease. He immediately retaliated by hitting Ron with the stock of his AKMSU, knocking the teenager to the floor of the porch with a bloody nose.

“Listen here, you fucking donkey!” Jason roared furiously. “I don’t have the time or the patience to put up with your nonsense. Wake up or shut up!”

Just as Jason was about to continue his angry lecture he heard gunshots from inside the house. He raised his gun and tried to peer through the glass panels of the door but he couldn’t see where the shots were coming from. The house fell silent again. Ron stood up and went to open the door but Jason pushed him back. They needed to wait.

Ron was about to argue when loud shrieks and screams erupted from inside the house. It sounded like two women with one of them unmistakably being Jessie. Ron rushed to the door and tried to open but found that it was locked. He fought with the door handle but it wouldn’t move. Jason shoved him aside and shot the lock before kicking the door open, destroying the lock and forcing the door to swing open.

When the two of them ran in, Jason immediately aimed his AKMSU at the first movement he spotted in the front room. Jessie was on top of a female Wolf and was stabbing the other woman in the chest repeatedly with a pair of scissors. Blood splatters decorated the closest wall, Jessie’s hands, chest and face were covered in blood and the Wolf’s body lay in a pool of blood. Jessie let out one last scream as she stabbed the dead woman in the side of the head to prevent reanimation.

“Jessie!” Jason called, prompting the blonde woman to spin around with the scissors still in hand.

“Jason…” Jessie gasped out before jumping to her feet. “Ron!”

“You alright?” Jason asked the stylist as Ron rushed over to his mother.

Jessie nodded. “I’m fine.”

“Okay. Barricade this door behind me and hide.” Jason told them. “Don’t come out until this is over.”

Jessie nodded and started tending to Ron’s bleeding nose, not realising that Jason was the one to have caused it. By the time she looked up again, Jason was already gone.

 

The group led by Michonne and Glenn reached a town at the end of the long road they had been walking along. They were getting closer to home as it was the same town Jason and Daryl had been to the previous day. The town was still deathly quiet without any signs of people or walkers.

“Check to see if these cars work first, see if they can get us back.” Michonne suggested, looking at the abandoned cars in question.

“I’ll stay with them.” David offered, referring to the injured Annie and Scott.

The others agreed with Glenn, Heath and Nicholas relinquishing their support for Annie and Scott so they could help Michonne check the vehicles. The herd was closing in on them now that they were moving much slower than before so they had to find transport quickly.

Glenn, Heath, Nicholas and Michonne all kept the weapons at the ready as they approached some of the cars. Unfortunately for them, every car they tried to start had either a flat battery or no fuel. People had come through and taken the fuel from the cars some time ago.

“Listen, I need to get home but I’m not leaving them behind.” Glenn whispered to Michonne. He was desperate to make sure Maggie was safe but his conscience stopped him from running ahead. “We patch Scott up and we get going.”

“Rick knows when he knows but we’re ahead of the herd, maybe half an hour now.” Michonne replied, understanding his concerns. “We can stop, we can make it.”

Glenn nodded in agreement despite his grim expression and continued searching the other vehicles. Michonne stayed where she was for a moment, hoping that everyone at the community was still alive and were defending the place from whatever was happening. She knew she didn’t need to worry too much about Carl considering Jason would die before letting something happen to him.

“This is half way home, right?” Heath commented to Nicholas.

“Yeah.” Nicholas responded, knowing where Heath was going with the question.

“This is where it happened.” Heath continued, referring to Nicholas’ old team who died on a run.

“I said it at the dealership, me and Aiden didn’t know what we were doing.” Nicholas defended himself, the guilt already breaking him as it was.

“The people on your crew who died?” Heath questioned, wondering if they had known what to do and Nicholas had lied about that too.

Nicholas sighed. “They weren’t afraid. We were.”

Glenn and Michonne walked over to them as Nicholas checked an old delivery van. Just like the other vehicles, there was no fuel or no battery or some combination of the two. None of the cars in the town could be used for transport.

“No luck.” Glenn stated in disappointment.

“We have to stay on foot.” Heath replied, equally disappointed. “Nicholas was here last, he can show us the way.”

Nicholas nodded hesitantly, not feeling comfortable with the responsibility being placed on him. “Okay.”

“Alright.” Glenn agreed and made his way back over to Annie, Scott and David alongside Heath.

Once they had regrouped they started to make their way through the town with Nicholas leading them. The street was eerily silent with the only sounds being the rustling of leaves in the wind and their footsteps on the paved road. Nicholas suddenly stopped and bent down.

“Oh, Jesus.” He muttered as he picked up a hat they all recognised.

“Sturgess?” Scott questioned, earning a nod of confirmation from Nicholas.

“He left us behind.” Annie commented solemnly.

Nicholas shuddered as his guilt continued to ravage his conscience. He had been that kind of guy just the week before, he had gotten Noah killed and had almost done the same to Glenn. Now he understood what it felt like to be the victim of such a cowardly person. It made him feel sick.

 

Bodies littered the streets of Alexandria that were gradually being painted red with blood. People continued to scream and run as the intruders, the group known as the Wolves, killed people and ransacked the houses. They were merciless, crazed and numerous.

Carol walked down the street, disguised as the first Wolf she killed, while Morgan trailed behind her holding the chains in such a way that it looked like he was captured. They had made it past several Wolves and none had attacked from the side-lines so they were off to a good start. They weren’t far from the armoury when two Wolves ran past, a man and a woman. They took one look and were instantly fooled by the disguise.

“Good catch, Aphid.” The man said as he ran past on his way to kill more people.

As they powered on, Morgan turned to his left and spotted one of the Wolves attacking Gabriel. He stopped, forcing Carol to stop as well because of the chains. Carol turned to find out what had caught his attention and watched as Gabriel ended up on his back.

“Come on!” Carol pressed. “Leave him!”

“No!” Morgan answered and took his staff from her before he ran towards Gabriel.

Carol let him go and dropped the chains. She was close enough anyway. She started running towards the armoury and pulled out her revolver when she saw two Wolves come out of one of the houses. They too were tricked by her disguise.

“Hey, Aphid!” One of them called. “Where’d you get the gun?”

Carol took aim and shot the first one in the head and the second in the throat. Two more Wolves came out of the building so Carol shot at them. The bullet missed and her revolver clicked empty, forcing her to run as fast as she could towards the armoury with the two Wolves hot on her heels.

 

The group rushed through the town as fast as they could with the walking wounded. They could smell the herd’s approach in the air and knew they were running out of time to get Scott patched up before they got home. Nicholas led them down an alleyway between buildings but froze when he reached the exit.

In front of them was a small pack of walkers, all of them kneeling on the ground feasting on the corpse of none other than Sturgess. Judging by how much blood was on the ground and how far into his chest cavity their heads were reaching, he had been dead for at least an hour. The feeding frenzy around his corpse was attracting even more walkers to the area.

Glenn grabbed Nicholas’ shoulder and pulled him back as he appeared to have zoned out in horror. The pull was enough to bring Nicholas back to reality and forced him to back up and lead the group in the opposite direction of the feeding frenzy, hoping none of the walkers actually noticed them.

At the end of the alley, Nicholas looked to his right. “The herd’s that way.”

He turned left and froze again. There were walkers both to their right and to their left, seemingly spawning from nowhere as the town started to lose its tranquillity.

“Shit.” He cursed as he tried to figure out where to go. The more time wasted the less chance they had of escape.

“Nicholas!” Glenn hissed, they were counting on him and couldn’t have him freeze up on them then and there.

Nicholas hesitated before guiding them back down the street and into an old pet store. They closed the door behind them, grateful that the windows had mostly been boarded up so the walkers wouldn’t notice them. The air in the shop was thick with the stench of death. Animal skeletons sat in the display cases where they had been abandoned at the start of the apocalypse.

They all kept their weapons at the ready as they split up and made their way down each aisle. They had to make sure the store was safe and secure before they could allow themselves to relax. If the shop was safe they could take a moment to wait for the walkers to pass before leaving, giving them enough time to avoid the herd. They all relaxed when they met up at the back of the store. It was secure for the time being.

“We stay quiet, we patch Scott and Annie up then we get outta here.” Michonne told Heath the plan.

“Those walkers in the alley and down the street, they’re blocking the way outta town.” Heath told her. It felt like they had to deal with obstacle after obstacle.

“We can’t take them on, not in the shape that we’re in.” Michonne replied pragmatically. “We’ll have to lead them away if we have to.”

“Cause that’s been working well lately.” Heath remarked sarcastically.

“I’m trying here.” Michonne retorted, annoyed. “I’m not giving up.”

“Yeah, not yet.” Heath countered cynically.

“Hey, I was thinking, if we can find a way to distract the herd coming here then they won’t make it back to the community.” Glenn whispered to them.

“How?” Heath questioned, the suggestion seemed impossible to him.

“By burning one of the buildings, hopefully more.” Glenn replied, gesturing to his flare gun. “They’ll get drawn to it, they’ll stop here.”

“It’s gonna take some time.” Heath commented, concerned that time wasn’t something they had.

“I’ll do it.” Michonne offered. “You stay with them.”

“It’s my plan, it’s on me.” Glenn argued.

“You have a wife, Glenn.” Michonne argued back. He had more to lose.

“That’s why I’m doing this. You gotta get everybody back.” Glenn replied confidently. “You’re the one who can. If I take too long you just go.”

“I’m not leaving without you. That is not the way this works!” Michonne scolded him.

“I’ll meet you there.” Glenn replied calmly. “If I get stuck here I’ll find some way to show you guys I’m okay. We all have a job to do.”

“There’s a feed store. It’s old, lot of dry stuff inside. It should go up easy.” Nicholas told them. “I’ll go with you.”

Glenn sighed and thought about it. This was going to be a very dangerous plan that could easily end badly, he wasn’t sure he wanted Nicholas going with him for it.

“I can draw a map.” Nicholas suggested, sensing Glenn’s distrust.

“No. You lead the way.” Glenn told him, deciding to give him a chance at redemption. “Just gotta do one thing first.”

Glenn dropped his bag to the floor and unzipped it as he went through the plan in his head. There were hundreds of ways the whole thing could go wrong but he had to try for the sake of his friends and loved ones. He had to try for Maggie, the most important person in the world to him. He took out Hershel’s old pocket watch, the gift he had given to Glenn as a sign of his trust and blessing.

_“If you become a father one day you’ll understand. No man is good enough for your little girl. Until one is.”_

He remembered the trust Hershel had placed in him all that time ago. Hershel had seen Glenn for who he was, the good man he was inside when most of the others only saw a naïve kid. Maggie’s father had set an incredible example for him in terms of wisdom and bravery. He owed it to Hershel to do whatever was necessary to keep Maggie safe.

_“You step outside, you risk your life. You take a drink of water, you risk your life and nowadays you breathe and you risk your life. Every moment now, you don’t have a choice. The only thing you can choose is what you’re risking it for.”_

Glenn knew that the lives of his loved ones were worth the risk. He would set the building on fire, distract the herd and get home safe to his loving wife and friends. He had to. Glenn pulled out the walkie-talkie so he could inform Rick of the plan. If he was going back for the RV he could pick them up after they were done.

 

Rick ran down one of the abandoned woodland roads the herd had passed down earlier. He was closing in on the location of the RV, which was where they had built the wall. Further down the road there were three walkers feasting on the corpse of one of the Alexandrians who had been helping with the plan. As he ran towards them, his radio hissed static before Glenn’s voice sounded from the speaker.

“Rick, it’s Glenn. We’re in a town five degrees east of the green marker. If you get around on Redding in the next twenty minutes you should be good. I think that’s how far we’re ahead of the herd.”

Rick pulled out the small knife he had looted from Barnes’ dead body as he marched towards the walkers, one of the hungry corpses having already spotted him on his approach. Rick stabbed the first walker in the temple and pulled back only to have the blade snap off the handle.

“We’re gonna try and set a fire and distract them. If you don’t see smoke they’re still coming your way.”

The second walker had a machete stuck in its face, the result of a bad swing with the blade. Its face had been split in two but the braincase was largely intact, allowing it to continue living.  Rick held the walker by the collar and grabbed the handle of the machete, pulling the blade out of its face before slamming it back down onto its head, slicing it in two. Rick immediately winced as he felt the blade slice into his own hand at the same time, a fatigue induced mistake. He looked at his bleeding hand before growling as he swung at the third walker and decapitated it. Rick grit his teeth in pain as he clenched his fist, the cut having sliced open his palm.

“I gotta go. Good luck, dumbass.”

Rick knelt down on the road beside the dead body and stabbed it in the forehead with the machete. He took a few moments to catch his breath before he started raiding the man’s body for supplies. Rick grabbed the man’s bag and took his gun, ammo, knife and food bars. Once they were all in the bag, Rick stood up and placed the bag over his shoulder before he took off running again.

 

Gabriel struggled to defend himself against the large man on top of him. The Wolf had him pinned down and brought a knife down towards his throat but Gabriel grabbed the man’s hand, stopping him. They both groaned and gasped as they desperately struggled to overpower the other.

“You’re dead!” The Wolf exclaimed.

Gabriel took a deep breath and pushed the man’s hands away. The Wolf changed the way he held the knife and swung his arm down to stab Gabriel but before he could Morgan knocked the blade out of his hand with his staff. The man winced in pain and turned to Morgan just in time to see the staff strike him in the face and knock him unconscious.

 

Scott shook in pain as Michonne wrapped a bandage around the bullet wound in his leg. The discolouration meant that it was probably infected but all they could do for the time being was stop the bleeding.

“That should keep you going till we get to the infirmary.” Heath commented optimistically. “Annie, I’m gonna figure out a crutch for you.”

“Just leave me.” Annie replied.

“What?” Heath questioned in surprise.

“I’m slowing you down, we’re gonna hit more roamers.” Annie explained. “It’s that simple. Leave me.”

“Leave us. It’s stupid for you guys to wait on me. We’ll all go down.” Scott added, much to Heath’s anger. “Come on man, wake up. You don’t wanna do it now, you do it out there. If we get into trouble again you run and you don’t look back.”

 “No, if we go, we go together. We got each other’s backs just like always.” Heath retorted, glaring at Michonne. “We don’t leave people behind. Not us.”

Michonne glared back. “No one is leaving anyone behind.”

“I’m gonna find something for you, Annie.” Heath told the young woman as he got up and started searching the shelves.

Michonne decided to stand up and follow him over to the other side of the store. She had put up with one too many of his scathing, cynical and sarcastic remarks towards her. She wasn’t going to let him get away with it for a second longer.

“Hey. You have a problem with me?” Michonne began.

“Just looking out for my people.” Heath replied, evading the question.

“And you think that I’m not?” Michonne challenged.

“Look, I heard what Rick said.” Heath told her with a sigh of frustration.

“Which part?” Michonne questioned as she stood in front of him.

“How they wouldn’t all make it, they meaning us and not you.” Heath made his case. “How you should just leave us behind if we can’t keep up?”

“Glenn is out there risking his life for you and for everyone else and I’m still here so I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about!” Michonne hissed.

“Things are gonna get worse and then we’ll see.” Heath retorted with a growl.

“Yeah, we will.” Michonne replied. “Rick said what he said because sometimes you don’t have a choice.”

“That is not how we do it!” Heath argued back angrily.

“Because you’ve never had to do it any other way!” Michonne countered. “You haven’t been through it, not really.”

“Michonne…” Heath began but was interrupted.

“Not like Rick!” Michonne stated, angered by his ignorance. “Rick was out there. I was out there. We know. You don’t. But if you don’t learn you will die, we will!”

“I’ve been doing runs from the start, okay?” Heath argued. “I know what it’s like!”

“Have you ever had to kill people because they had already killed your friends and were coming for you next? Have you ever done things that made you feel afraid of yourself afterward?” Michonne questioned him fiercely. “Have you ever been covered in so much blood that you didn’t know if it was yours, or walkers’ or your friends’?”

Heath was silent. He had never gone through any of that.

“Then you don’t know!” Michonne finished angrily.

 

Carol reached the armoury and pushed open the two large doors just as the first Wolf reached her. The other woman slammed into her from behind, shoving her into the collection of guns. Carol grabbed an M4 assault rifle and thrust it back into the other woman’s stomach before spinning round and firing the gun into her body. The woman’s body shook violently as the bullets tore through her before collapsing to the ground.

The second Wolf, a bearded man, quickly tried to double back as soon as he saw the gun. Carol fired the gun and shot the man in the back twice, causing him to fall against the door before he took off running, adrenaline keeping him going. Carol looked out the window and saw the blood trail, confirming that she had actually shot him.

Carol relaxed and set the gun down against the double door. She walked over to the female Wolf who was gasping for breath as she clung to life on the floor. With one swift movement, Carol stabbed the psychopath in the temple. An odd noise from the door in front of her caught her attention, so she pulled out the knife and made her way slowly towards the door. Carol grabbed the handle and quickly pulled the door open with her knife raised.

“Please don’t kill me!” Olivia pleaded in sheer terror from her hiding spot in the pantry.

Carol pulled down her rag. “It’s okay. Is anybody else down here?”

Olivia remained silent as Carol glanced behind her, checking the door to make sure no Wolves were sneaking in.

Carol turned back round to the large woman. “Olivia!”

“No, no. I’m the only one.” Olivia finally answered as she continued to tremble in fear.

Carol sheathed her knife and grabbed a bag from the hallway. She returned to the gun rack and started filling the big with handguns.

“Come here.” Carol ordered. “Now!”

Olivia hesitantly made her way over to the older woman who was bagging all the handguns that lay on the rack.

“You barricade that door behind me once I leave.” Carol told her before grabbing one of the handguns, a Star Model B. “You know how to shoot a gun?”

Olivia shook her head. Carol handed her the gun.

“Stand here. Finger here. Aim there.” Carol explained, pointing to the doorway. “If one of them comes through that door you squeeze and you don’t stop until they’re on the ground.”

Carol finished her explanation and left the armoury, closing the double doors behind her.

 

Jason squeezed his eyes shut for a moment as he ran through some smoke so that it wouldn’t sting his eyes. One of the trees was on fire with a charred body next to it, the result of another Molotov cocktail attack. He ran further down the street, although he had promised Carl that he would get back to the house he had to help. Jason was outside and he was armed, there was no excuse to not help.

A sudden scream interrupted his thoughts as one of the residents ran towards him. Behind the screaming woman was one of the Wolves who was chasing her with a machete raised in the air. Jason aimed down the red dot sight at the Wolf and fired as soon as the woman moved out the way. He fired a burst of shots into the man’s chest, causing him to crash to the ground with a roar of pain. As Jason walked up to him, the Wolf tried to stand up but the teen simply finished his attack by shooting him in the head.

Jason picked up the man’s machete and handed it to the woman he had saved. She looked at him in confusion as she held the bladed weapon in shaky hands.

“Take this. Go home and lock yourself inside.” Jason told her. “If any of them break in, use this to kill them.”

“I can’t kill people.” The woman protested. “I’m not a killer.”

“Then you’ll die.” Jason retorted impatiently. “It’s kill or be killed. Take your pick.”

Jason watched as she ran towards her house, making sure she wasn’t attacked again before reaching the door. Once she was safe, he turned back to the main street with his gun at the ready as he headed further down the street. After a couple minutes of carefully making his way through the chaos another Wolf stood in his way wielding an axe.

Jason took aim at the man but hesitated when three others approached him to create a circle around him. They had identified him as the biggest threat and knew he couldn’t shoot all of them in the time it would take just one of them to reach him. They each had different weapons, an axe, a spear, a machete and a sickle. Jason held his ground and his aim on the first Wolf as they chuckled to each other. They had the upper hand.

“You’re dead, little man.” The Wolf with the axe taunted as they continued to close in.

“You first.” Jason spat back.

He knew he had to do something. He had to make it back to Carl and he refused to be killed by the psychopaths that had surrounded him. Jason took a breath and decided to throw caution to the wind. He opened fire on the Wolf with the axe, gunning him down with a quick burst of five rounds, catching the man completely off guard.

The other Wolves jumped to action and rushed towards him with their weapons ready. Jason spun to his right and fired his AKMSU with one hand, holding down the trigger so that the gun continued to fire out a steady stream of bullets as he moved. The two Wolves who had been on his right side were caught by the rapid flow of bullets and fell to the ground.

Jason rushed forward towards their bodies just in time to avoid a stab from the Wolf with a spear. He spun round to face the remaining Wolf and fired his gun without realising how close the Wolf was. The blood covered man used his spear to knock Jason’s gun out of his hands, the weapon swinging to his side as it was still attached by the strap.

The man growled angrily as he thrust his spear forward in an attempt to impale Jason but the teen side stepped the attack. Jason grabbed onto the man’s spear and wrestled with him for it. Jason kept his arms loose so that when the man pulled or pushed with the spear he went with the movements and kept his grip easily. The Wolf suddenly used the width of the spear as leverage and pushed Jason up against the wall of one of the buildings, knocking the back of Jason’s head against the bricks. The teen groaned in pain as he fought with the taller man, refusing to let go of the spear or give up the fight.

The man roared with effort before striking Jason in the groin with a powerful kick. Jason doubled over from the pain and in a moment of weakness lost his grip on the spear. The Wolf pulled the spear from him and thrust it towards his face but Jason reacted in time to grab it by the sides again, stopping the stab just in time. The tip of the spear was mere inches from his face and the other man was a little stronger than him.

Jason clamoured as he fought to keep the spear from reaching him. His arm muscles burned and shook from the effort.  He knew he would lose unless he found a way to redirect the attack. With a deep growl he pushed back to force the man to try harder and when he did he swiftly moved his body to the side and let go of the spear. The Wolf thrust the spear into the wall and stumbled forward from the sudden movement. Jason quickly unsheathed his machete and swung it down on the man’s neck, slicing it open before the blade stopped on the bone.

Jason used the machete to force the Wolf down onto the ground, gurgling as he drowned in his own blood, before removing the machete and swinging it down a second time. This time, the blade struck the Wolf’s head and split his skull in two. Jason stood on the man’s face and pulled the machete out of his head before sheathing it again. He leaned against the wall to get his breath back before gripping his AKMSU again. Before he continued on, he made sure to shoot each of the other three dead Wolves in the head to stop reanimation.

 

Glenn and Nicholas ran down one of the many streets in the town, the top exit of which was blocked by a large truck. The further down the street they went the more dead bodies they found, most of which had been walkers. They slowed down when they discovered that one of them, pinned under a car tire, was still moving. It snarled up at them with a ripped open abdomen and only one eye, reaching at them in vain. Glenn pulled out his knife.

“Wait. It should be me.” Nicholas stopped him, his conscience forcing him to explain. “He was on my crew, his name was Will. He was nineteen. We left him behind.”

Nicholas shuddered with guilt as he faced the consequences of what he had done. It had been one of the reasons he had wanted Jason out of the community. Jason was nineteen and with similar hair and the resemblance was too much for him to stomach. Nicholas couldn’t believe how horrible he had been to so many people since the world fell apart.

“You’re not that guy anymore.” Glenn assured him. “Hey! You are here now. You are not that guy anymore.”

Nicholas nodded and Glenn stepped aside. The curly haired man crouched down next to Will’s reanimated corpse and held his flailing arms down with one hand as he stared into his one dead eye. He silently pleaded for forgiveness for what he had done to the poor teenager before he thrust his blade into the walker’s forehead. As he stared down at the corpse he was startled by a loud gunshot which was followed by several more.

“Shit!” Nicholas exclaimed in horror as he whipped round to look in the direction of Alexandria. “Is that home?”

“We need to go, now!” Glenn pressed and started running ahead in search of the feed store.

They both knew that the gunshots would simply draw the walkers towards the community even more than the horn had already done. They were running out of time.

 

Gabriel crouched over the unconscious Wolf who had tried to kill him mere moments before. Morgan was busy tying the man’s hands together as he had already done the same with his legs. He had to remember his mantra that all life was precious, so he couldn’t just kill the unconscious man beneath him.

“How did you learn how to do that?” Gabriel asked, referring to his skills with his staff.

“From a cheesemaker.” Morgan answered vaguely.

Just as he finished tying the man up, he stirred and woke up. Morgan raised his staff and held it near the man’s face in a sign of aggression. The dazed Wolf looked up at the two men.

“Our friends, they’re trapped.” He muttered, much to Gabriel’s confusion. “You need to know. People don’t belong here anymore.”

A loud bang made both men jump as a bullet smashed through the man’s skill, straight through the W on his forehead. Morgan and Gabriel looked up to find Carol standing there with a bag of guns in one hand and a Beretta 92FS in the other. She quickly handed Gabriel the Beretta before reaching into the bag for a Glock, which she handed to Morgan before running off further down the street.

At the intersection of the streets she found Maggie, who called out to her, unsure of whether it really was her under the hooded overcoat. Carol called back to confirm it was her before waving a Smith & Wesson Sigma at Maggie as an offering. Maggie took the gun willingly so that she could help fight the intruders.

“Here.” Morgan said to Gabriel and handed him the Glock.

“I’m…I’m not very good with guns.” Gabriel stuttered out as he held a gun in each hand.

“Me neither.” Morgan remarked before heading further down the street in search of other people who needed help.

Gabriel looked around, unsure of where to go or what to do. He didn’t feel any safer despite the fact he now had two handguns.

 

Inside the pet store, Heath, David, Scott, Annie and Michonne could all hear the gunshots. Heath helped them to their feet as Michonne stood by the window, looking out onto the street.

“Okay, let’s go.” Heath told them as he assisted them. “We gotta go now.”

They watched as the walkers outside started walking past the windows, casting flickering shadows into the shop.

“The ones down the street and into the alley.” Michonne identified them. “They’re getting drawn by the gunfire.”

They all remained silent inside the store as they watched the walkers pass by, snarling and rasping loudly as they did.

“As soon as they’re clear, we head straight for the feed store.” Michonne told them in a loud whisper. “Till then we sit tight. Keep quiet.”

 

Rick panted and grit his teeth with each loud gasp of air he took as he powered down the road. Sweat rolled down his face and glued his shirt to his skin. He clenched his injured hand and tried his best to ignore the agonising throb that came with each heartbeat. Rick roared with exertion as he reached the wall they had constructed, the panels painted red with blood. At the base of the wall was a pile of crushed walker bodies that had been trampled by the sheer size of the herd.

Rick ran past the crushed walkers and ran up a slanted panel that worked as a ramp on the edge of the wall. He made his way over to the other side and rushed up to the RV, throwing open the door and scrambling inside to the driver’s seat. He dropped the bag and his Narinco rifle on the seat next to him and started the engine.

Rick drove with one hand as his left hand continued to throb painfully as blood trickled down his arm. He pulled out of where the RV had been parked and floored the accelerator pedal, speeding down Redding road after the herd. He had to get there as soon as possible regardless of whether Glenn’s plan worked or not. 

 

Jason ran down the street just as he heard a loud scream. Ahead of him one of the residents had just been slashed in the side of the neck by one of the Wolves. The man fell to the ground and dropped a Mossberg 590 Compact Cruiser shotgun. Jason aimed at the Wolf and pulled the trigger only for his AKMSU to click empty.

He cursed and ran towards the bearded man. He couldn’t let the Wolf get a hold of the gun as the only advantage Alexandria had over the intruders was the possession of firearms. Jason ran at full speed as the Wolf picked up the gun and when he turned around Jason tackled him, slamming him against the side of the Chevrolet Suburban that had been used to exile Jason. The shotgun fell to the ground and was kicked under the car as the two men scuffled with one another.

The Wolf pulled out a bowie knife and slashed at Jason, slicing his cheek before slicing at his leather jacket, leaving a small gash on the surface as the teen jumped back. The Wolf tried to stab Jason but the teen pushed the man’s arm out the way as he side stepped but the larger man elbowed him in the chest, knocking him against the car.

The Wolf raised the bowie knife and attempted a vertical stab to Jason’s head but Jason grabbed the man’s wrist and then grabbed his own wrist with his free hand for added support. The two of them grunted and growled at each other as they fought for power. When the psychopath used his own free hand to double the downward force of his stab, Jason moved and let the man’s hands drop down onto the car bonnet. There was the sudden, ear splitting sound of the blade striking the metal.

Jason let go with one of his hands, using one to hold the man’s arm against the car while the other grabbed the man by the hair and pulled him in for a powerful head-butt. The Wolf’s nose exploded with blood as Jason’s head broke it on impact. The teen let go of the man and kicked him in the side, knocking him to the ground. He then dived down and started crawling under the car for the shotgun but was stopped when the Wolf grabbed his ankle.

Jason used his free leg to kick the man square in the nose, hearing another loud crunch followed by a yelp of pain from the Wolf who let go to clutch his face. Jason grabbed the shotgun and made it out on the other side of the car. As he stood up, he turned just as the Wolf jumped and slid himself over the front of the car. The Wolf had been too slow, however, and as soon as he was half way through his slide across the car Jason pulled the trigger of the shotgun and blasted a crater in the man’s chest.

The Wolf’s body flew back and rolled over the opposite side of the car, blood splatters on the windshield and car bonnet. Jason rushed round and picked up the bowie knife off the ground before using it to stab the man’s corpse in the head. He panted heavily from the exertion and pumped the shotgun, ejecting the spent shell so that it was ready to fire again. He winced as the adrenaline wore off enough for him to feel the slash to his face, the blood running down his cheek and dripping onto his jacket.

 

Rosita and Aaron spotted two Wolves inside one of the houses, looting it for items of value to them. They creeped beneath the window and made their way round to the porch. As soon as the Wolves came rushing out of the house, Rosita shot one of them in the head. The other rushed for Aaron and tried to jump over the banister but Aaron shot him twice. The man fell from the banister and crashed onto the ground as Rosita and Aaron looked around for more of them.

 

As Jason made his way through the community, he could tell the chaos was gradually coming to an end. He had spotted someone in an overcoat killing some of the Wolves so he could only assume that it was Carol. He remembered how she had saved them all from Terminus and assumed she was doing something equally incredible.

A scream sounded nearby so he ran towards the source. He turned a corner and peered into a garden where Trisha had been cornered by one of the Wolves. Jason took aim with the shotgun but he wasn’t sure if he was out of range and the spread of the shot could hit Trisha. He hesitated, panic setting in as he didn’t know what to do.

The Wolf raised their hatchet above their head and prepared to kill Trisha in one swift move. Trisha shrieked again from fear but her scream was answered by a bark. Jason watched with amazement as Brodie jumped out of one of the house windows and entered the garden. The chocolate Labrador snarled aggressively before pouncing on the Wolf, his canines ripping into the man’s throat as Brodie shook his head violently.

The man’s body shook just as violently as he tried to fight off the dog but the damage was already done and within moments the man stopped moving. Brodie held the man’s jugular in his mouth for a few more moments to make sure he was dead. Once the dog let go, he barked and rushed up to Trisha, rubbing up against her and licking her face.

Jason entered the garden and picked up the Wolf’s hatchet and embedded it in his forehead. He petted Brodie who welcomed his presence as usual, as if he hadn’t just ripped a man’s throat out.

“Oh Jason, thank God you’re here!” Trisha exclaimed, still shaking in terror.

“I’m not the one who saved you.” Jason replied with a small smile. “Thank Brodie.”

“I know but can you stay with me?” Trisha asked desperately. “I’m terrified of being left alone!”

Jason shook his head. “I can’t, I have to get back to Carl and Judith.”

Trisha was about to argue her case but Jason handed her the Compact Cruiser. She looked at the weapon fearfully, having never used one before she was scared of hurting herself with it.

“There’s nothing to using a gun. Just point, pull, pump, repeat.” Jason explained, showing her the trigger and the pump for ejecting the shells. “You have four rounds left in the gun, so barricade your house and use this if any more of those guys attack, okay?”

“I don’t know if I can!” Trisha responded frightfully.

“You can. Brodie was brave and defended you.” Jason told her, patting the dog in question. “Now it’s your turn. I’ll be back soon, I promise.”

Trisha nodded in defeat and headed back to her house with Brodie staying close by her side, licking the blood off his mouth. Jason waited until the door closed behind them before leaving the garden and heading back into the street.

 

As they waited for the walkers to pass by them, David sat next to Michonne and wrote something on a small piece of paper. He knew his time was running out no matter what happened, he could already feel the effects of the infection in his blood. The fever was starting, making him desperate to see his wife one last time before he died.

He rolled up the paper and handed it to Michonne silently. The samurai glanced down at the paper, taking it from him. She unrolled it and read what he had written.

_Betsy, my love. If you are reading this it’s because I didn’t make it._

Michonne rolled it back up before using the same pen to write on her own wrist. She held her arm out straight so that he could read it.

_You’re getting home._

Michonne handed David his note back, confident that it wouldn’t be necessary because he was going to get to see his wife again. She was going to make sure of it. David pocketed the note and trusted her judgement.

Suddenly, some loud bangs sounded from the opposite end of the pet store. Michonne stood up and looked at the back wall where there was a poster of a dog. David cocked his shotgun and aimed it towards the wall as well. Michonne walked up to the poster and tore it down, revealing a metal door. The loud bangs were coming from the other side of the door.

Michonne swung the door open to reveal two walkers. Both of them had clearly been employees who had trapped themselves inside and had since died, their skin half eaten by maggots. The first walker charged out but Michonne was quick to slice its head in two with her sword, the body collapsing against a shelf and knocking a carrier onto the floor. The second walker lay on the ground and snarled loudly up at her before having its own head cut in two by Michonne’s katana.

“They heard that!” Heath warned as the walkers outside approached the window.

Heath and Annie helped Scott to his feet as Michonne rushed over to the window to assess the situation outside. If there were a few walkers she would just have to lead them away and kill them while the others made a break for it.

“They know we’re in here now.” Heath told them, panicking. “We can’t wait them out. The herd is gonna be here any minute.”

Michonne felt the colour drain from her face as she looked outside. The other side of town was teeming with walkers. The herd had arrived and was quickly overtaking the entire town leaving no chance of escape. If the herd was alerted to their location in the pet store there would be no escape at all.

“They’re coming…” Michonne gasped out as she realised they had to make an all or nothing decision.

They had to move. Annie, Scott, David and Heath aimed their guns at the door while Michonne kept herself to the side. They pulled open the two doors of the pet store and fired their guns at the walkers that had been banging against them. The small pack of walkers collapsed back onto the ground as Michonne took the lead with her sword. She rushed out and swiftly decapitated the three closest walkers.

“Go!” She shouted at the others. “Come on!”

They rushed out of the store and onto the street with their guns raised. The herd was only a few feet behind them, the stench of rotting flesh was overwhelming and the deathly chorus was deafening. The herd snarled as it flooded towards its escaping prey. Half the town was blanketed by the sheer size and density of the approaching herd.

“Where’s the feed store?” Michonne shouted desperately.

“On the other side of town!” David shouted back as he ran.

“We can’t!” Heath added, struggling to run and support Scott at the same time. “We gotta go now!”

The feed store was on the other side of the herd and it still hadn’t been lit. This made them fear the worst for Glenn and Nicholas and left them no other choice but to keep running. They ran as fast as they could while keeping Scott and Annie with them. Suddenly, Annie fell to the ground as she went over her ankle again in her blind panic to escape the advancing wall of death. The others contemplated trying to save her, feeling torn over what they could do.

“Just run!” Annie shouted as she crawled towards them. “Go!”

The others looked on in horror as Annie fired at the advancing corpses until her gun clicked empty. The wall of death reached her as the walkers descended upon her and started ripping into her, tearing chunks of flesh out of her body and splitting her open as she shrieked in agony. The rest of the herd stumbled past the feeding frenzy over Annie’s body, forcing the others to keep running for their lives. The herd advanced towards them like water, gradually covering the entire area as it trickled towards them without any possibility of stopping.

 

“Jason!” Gabriel called from behind some bushes.

Jason rushed over to Gabriel with his TRP Operator in his hands, constantly looking around for any danger. He was surprised to find the priest with two handguns in his hands.

“Your new church isn’t far.” Jason told him. “Stick close to me and I’ll get you there.”

“What about everyone else?” Gabriel asked him as they ran, looking around in an almost paranoid fashion.

“We’re working on that, don’t worry.” Jason answered as they ran past multitudes of dead bodies.

In front of the church was a walker, a resident that had been left to turn by the Wolves. The proof was the W that had been carved into their forehead before reanimation. Jason turned to Gabriel and took the Beretta out of his hand.

“In case you need to later.” Jason told him, gesturing to the Glock. “You should shoot this one.”

“They were a member of my flock, I can’t.” Gabriel stuttered in fear as the walker stumbled towards them.

“And they’re not anymore.” Jason retorted. “You told Carl you wanted to learn, so it’s time to learn!”

Gabriel swallowed thickly and aimed the gun with shaky hands. Jason used his hand to bend Gabriel’s elbows a little and manoeuvre his aim so that it was level with the walker’s head.

“Relax. Wait for it to get a little closer.” Jason told him as they watched the walker approach. “Now pull the trigger.”

Gabriel did as instructed and fired the gun, striking the walker right in between the eyes. The corpse collapsed onto its back as Gabriel shook with adrenaline. Jason hurried him over to the church and placed the Beretta down on the desk.

“Close the door when I leave.” Jason told him. “If any of those thugs try to get in, use the guns. You have more than enough ammo.”

Gabriel nodded hesitantly. He was far too afraid to face the Wolves in any kind of battle and would much rather avoid it. Jason headed for the door but turned to Gabriel one last time.

“Keep your head down and keep quiet.” He told the priest. “This will be over soon, so keep yourself safe. If anyone needs a place to hide, let them in this time.”

Gabriel nodded and closed the door behind the teen as Jason returned to the bloody streets of Alexandria. As Jason made his way down the street he spotted one of the Wolves hacking away at a dead body, trying to amputate all the limbs. The hooded figure who he assumed to be Carol walked up behind the man and shot him in the back of the head with her revolver.

Jason and Carol locked eyes in that moment. She knew he had betrayed her orders of staying in the house but when she saw that he had two guns and his machete, she let it be. He had made the right decision in her eyes and they were almost done. There weren’t many Wolves left alive. She turned and continued on her search for more Wolves while Jason continued looking for people who needed help.

 

Glenn and Nicholas ran down the street towards the feed store. They could smell the approaching herd so they knew they were just about out of time. One flare shot into the feed store would be enough to ignite the entire building and distract the herd for hours.

“It’s just over here!” Nicholas explained as he ran. “We just light it up and we go!”

The two men came to a sudden stop in front of the feed store. In front of them, right where Nicholas had said it was, were the charred remains of a building that had burned down a long time ago. The wooden beams and supports that were left had been burned into coal which sat on top of the foundations. Their plan had just fallen apart right in front of them.

“There’s gotta be another building.” Glenn stated optimistically.

Nicholas turned to look around and felt his blood run cold. The herd had arrived and was already flooding into the streets towards them. The two main escape routes for them were completely blocked by the cannibalistic corpses that continued to shamble towards them.

“We gotta go!” Glenn pressed as Nicholas whimpered in terror. “Where? Nicholas!”

“This way!” Nicholas offered hesitantly, pointing towards an alleyway.

“Come on!” Glenn shouted as he ran ahead of Nicholas down the alley.

At the end of the alley was a dumpster propped against a chain link fence. It was the perfect escape method as they could climb the dumpster and get over the fence before the herd reached them. When he reached the fence, Glenn noticed a side door to one of the buildings. He pounded against it but quickly realised it was locked. He made his way for the fence but reeled back when several walkers slammed against it. The herd was on the other side of the fence as well.

“Dammit!” Glenn cursed as he watched the herd flood down the narrow alley towards them.

He pulled out his Colt MK IV Series 70 handgun and prepared to fight the herd. In the back of his mind he knew perfectly well that they were boxed in with no hope of escape but he refused to give up. Glenn had to make it back home for Maggie and he wasn’t going to let a few thousand walkers stop him.

They both fired their guns at the advancing herd, each bullet destroying the brains of each walker they shot at. Despite their combined effort and excellent accuracy, the herd continued to flood towards them unhindered by the deaths of less than one percent of its population. Glenn’s gun quickly clicked as he ran out of bullets, forcing him to switch over to his knife. He was determined to stab every walker if that’s what kept him alive. Nicholas also pulled out his own knife as they started stabbing and killing the closest walkers to them, trying to be as fast as possible so they wouldn’t be overwhelmed.

 

Jason turned a corner and found two Wolves together. One of them had a man in chains and the other was hacking away at a corpse, though he was struggling with one of the legs as his blade was obviously blunt through constant use. They didn’t have the best resources, that much was clear.

Jason raised his TRP Operator and shot the Wolf who held the man in chains in the head. The other man who had been hacking away at the dead body jumped up and turned round before receiving a bullet straight through the eye socket. Jason didn’t have time for these savages anymore. He wanted them all dead.

“Jason!” Morgan called out, meeting him on the corner.

“Morgan.” Jason greeted as he looked around for any more Wolves.

Morgan looked down at the bodies and shook his head. “You don’t need to kill them.”

Jason glared at him, incredulous. “Of course we do. It’s kill or be killed right now.”

“But you’re not a killer.” Morgan told him. “I can see that. The way you are with Carl and Judith, that’s the real you.”

Jason tilted his head as he checked how many rounds he had left in his gun. “I’m whatever I need to be.”

“Killing them just makes you the same.” Morgan tried to argue. “You don’t enjoy it. It damages you. You struggle with it.”

Jason closed his eyes and held back his emotions before gesturing to the body that was being hacked up. The body belonged to one of his former students when he was still a teacher in Alexandria. A twelve year old boy.

“You see that? That’s what they do. They enjoy the killing and feel no guilt or remorse.” Jason hissed. “The fact that I don’t enjoy it, that it hurts me is proof that I’ll never be like them.”

Jason started to march past Morgan but the peaceful man stood in his way a moment longer.

“Morgan, get out of my way.” Jason growled, glaring into his eyes. “Now.”

Morgan stepped aside and sighed as he watched Jason march further down the street.

 

Michonne and the others rushed through a grass covered space between two buildings. Blocking the way was an old, rusty iron gate that was chained shut. There wouldn’t be time to break the chain and the herd was getting closer to the entrance to the alley. Michonne grabbed a sturdy and empty cable reel holder. She up ended it so that they could use it to climb the gate with.

“You go over first, then we’ll help Scott!” Michonne told David.

“No, they’re coming!” Scott argued. “Just go!”

“We’re doing this!” Michonne yelled back.

Heath stepped up onto the holder and climbed up and over the fence. Michonne and David helped Scott climb over as his injured leg made it much harder to climb. Michonne and David quickly glanced back as the herd flooded into the alleyway and poured towards them. Michonne climbed up onto the gate, followed by David just as the herd reached them. The walkers growled hungrily as they snapped their teeth together in anticipation of their next meal.

The first walkers to reach them grabbed onto both of David’s legs and one of Michonne’s legs, preventing them from climbing by holding them in place. Heath stood on top of two plastic garbage cans so he could help them over but he was relatively powerless from the other side of the gate. David clung onto the gate for dear life, refusing to be dragged down into the river of death while Michonne constantly kicked out, trying to free herself from the walker’s vice like grip.

Heath and Scott pulled out their guns and started shooting at the walkers on the other side of the gate. They were careful not to shoot Michonne or David and hoped that they could kill enough of the relentless corpses to give both of them time to climb over. Michonne growled as she used all her mite to hold onto the gate while she kicked out at the cadavers beneath her. She refused to die like this.

David screamed as the walkers finally pulled him off the gate and down to ground level. They crushed him against the bars of the gate as they immediately bit him all over and tore into him. He shrieked in agony and horror as his shoulders and back were ripped apart, blood pouring from his mouth as the corpses started eating him alive. Fortunately, most of the walkers at the gate focused on the feeding frenzy, giving Michonne space and allowing Heath to shoot the walker that held her in place.

As soon as the walker let go of Michonne’s leg, she quickly scrambled over the fence and onto the other side. There was nothing she could do to save David as he continued to wail in terror. The others watched in horror as his shirt changed from white to dark red as his blood poured out of him. His note to his wife, Betsy, lay on the grass beside him as the walkers continued to feast on his flesh. A walker crushed the note under its shoe as it tried to reach them from behind the bars, the iron hinges creaking with the weight being pressed against the gate.

“We gotta go! We gotta keep going!” Heath told them, shaking in horror. “We don’t have a choice! We don’t have a choice! Come on!”

Michonne and Heath supported Scott between them as they continued down the alley and into a part of town with no walkers. They were close to the woods and quickly made their way to the trees so they could lose the herd behind them as David’s screams faded away.

 

Morgan walked through the community towards the main gate. Things were starting to quieten down but they still had to be vigilant. There was still plenty of gunfire and screams as the violence continued. As he walked, one of the Wolves jogged up to him. It was the blonde Wolf from the woods.

“You.” The blonde man recognised Morgan instantly. “You live here?”

Morgan brandished his staff as four other Wolves joined the blonde one. They all had their weapons ready and were preparing to gang up on him. Morgan stared them down.

“Leave.” He told them.

The Wolf to his right, a woman, laughed before trying to slash at him. He deflected her attack with his staff, causing her to yelp in pain as she dropped her weapon. Morgan spun around and did the same to one of the men who tried to stab him with a knife.

“My people have guns.” Morgan warned them.

Morgan knocked the second woman to the floor and then did exactly the same with the second man. The first two to attack him now stood where they were, wary of approaching him. He was proving difficult.

“Yours don’t.” Morgan added.

Despite how hesitant they were, the first two tried to attack again but Morgan struck the woman in the leg and the man in the face.

“They may be aiming at you right now. Eyes in the scopes. Fingers on the triggers.” Morgan explained, causing the blonde Wolf to look around. “Boom!”

Morgan moved forward suddenly to emphasise his point, causing the blonde man to flinch and show his fear. He was fearful for his life, despite being a psychopath. It was the last test for Morgan. He didn’t need to kill them. They were already too scared to keep fighting.

“It’s gonna happen any second now unless you get the hell out of here and don’t ever come back.” Morgan warned them, knowing Jason was nearby and guessing Carol was too. “If you keep choosing this life, you will die.”

The blonde Wolf shook his head. “We didn’t choose.”

He clicked his tongue as a signal to the others to follow him. They sheathed their weapons and started running towards the main gate. Morgan watched them go but grew concerned when the blonde Wolf picked up a gun that had been lying on the ground next to a body. He stuffed it into his jeans before running for the gate. Morgan chased after them to make sure there were gone before closing the gate behind them.

 

Glenn and Nicholas continued stabbing the advancing walkers but they were running out of space and were about to be overwhelmed. Glenn kicked one of the walkers pack into the crowd, knocking several over in a domino effect before rushing over and climbing up onto the dumpster.

“Up here! Up here!” Glenn bellowed before helping Nicholas climb up to join him.

They stood on top of the dumpster, the walkers’ hands scratching at their boots as the whole thing shook with all the bodies pounding against it. Behind them, the fence shook back and forth as the other part of the herd tried to push it down to get to them. From the slightly higher vantage point, Glenn could see there was no way out. Not without help. As grim as the situation appeared, Glenn knew that if the others were alive he could radio them for help and could have Rick or someone else lead the herd away again. They just had to stay calm and be patient. They would get out of it alive. All hope was not lost.

Nicholas stared down at the decaying faces as they all snarled up at him. The stench made him want to vomit and it was compounded by the horrific injuries and stages of decay that each walker displayed. He watched as they snapped their teeth together hungrily. He had left his old team to die this way. He had left Aiden to die this way. He had left Noah to die this way. Every time he had abandoned people and left them to be consumed by these undead monsters. Nicholas was terrified that karma was about to make him suffer the same fate.

“Nicholas! Nicholas! Hey! Nicholas!” Glenn bellowed, grabbing the panicking man by his shoulders. “Look at me! Hey! Nicholas! Look at me!”

Glenn knew he needed to calm him down and tell him the plan. He could see that fear was getting the better of the curly haired man and was making him lose hope. They could still escape but they had to work together and trust one another if they wanted to live. What Glenn didn’t realise as he stared into Nicholas’ eyes, was that the man beside him had already made his decision.

Nicholas would not die the same way he had let so many others die. Nicholas would rather be responsible for his own fate. He reflected on everything he had done and realised that he had been a terrible person. Glenn had every right to kill him on the night of the meeting but he hadn’t, he had believed there was more to Nicholas. The Asian man had indeed been right and had given Nicholas a chance for redemption so that he wouldn’t be remembered as a coward in his final moments. He appreciated that more than words could express.

“Thank you.” Nicholas said sincerely as they were the only words he could find to express his gratitude.

Glenn was about to question what he was being thanked for but he didn’t have the time. Nicholas suddenly raised his gun to his own temple and immediately pulled the trigger, blowing his brains out and spraying Glenn with his blood. Glenn felt his legs go weak from the sudden shock, that and the weight of Nicholas falling limply against him was enough to knock him off the dumpster and into the sea of hungry walkers.

Glenn gasped as he hit the ground, knocking his head off the concrete which caused him to feel momentarily dazed. Then he realised where he was and what had happened. It had gone very dark because the walkers now towered over him, blocking out the light. He screamed in horror as blood and guts appeared in front of his eyes as the walkers started their feeding frenzy. Nicholas, in his final moments, had lost all hope and by doing so had removed any chance of escape for both of them.  

 

Jason unsheathed his machete and slammed it into the head of a walker. It was another resident who had been left to turn by the Wolves. He sheathed his machete again as the body crumpled on the floor before he headed through the courtyard and up onto Deanna’s terrace. He needed to check if she was alive or not. He opened the door to her living room and peered in.

“Deanna?” Jason called but received no reply from the woman.

Without warning, something heavy slammed into his hands and knocked his gun to the floor. He gasped in pain before noticing the Wolf who had been inside was going for his handgun. Jason dived at the man and grabbed his gun from the floor but the Wolf shoved him out onto the terrace, causing Jason to drop the gun over the banister and into the courtyard.

The Wolf punched Jason in the face twice, causing the slash in his cheek to open up even more as blood splattered with each impact. Jason blocked the third punch with his arm and wrapped it around the man’s arm. He punched the man in the throat, stunning him as he gasped for air. Jason’s punch hadn’t been enough to damage the windpipe but it gave him a moment to unsheathe his machete.

Noticing the machete, the Wolf slammed into Jason again, pushing him over the banister and causing them both to crash into the courtyard. Jason coughed, slightly winded from the landing as he struggled to get to his feet. The Wolf kicked him in the side, forcing him to roll over as he groaned in pain. When Jason opened his eyes he realised he was lying next to his gun and that the Wolf had his machete.

Jason quickly grabbed his gun as the Wolf ran towards him and tried to slash at him with the machete. Jason lay on his back and aimed up at the man, shooting him twice in the chest and once in the head. The Wolf fell back as he dropped the machete. Jason lay on his back for a few more moments just to catch his breath before he stood up again. He collected the machete from the ground and sheathed it again before leaving the courtyard. He didn’t know if Deanna was alive or dead but a Wolf in the house was a bad sign. It was time to return to Carl.

 

Michonne and Heath continued to support Scott as they trudged through the woods towards Alexandria. They had left the herd far behind them in the town and were safe for the time being. The price paid for their survival was the sacrifices of Annie, David and potentially Glenn and Nicholas as well. It was a hard pill to swallow but they were alive and were going to make it home. They were all exhausted but they couldn’t relax until they were back behind the safety of the walls.

They reached a creek that blocked their path. While Heath helped Scott to move along towards the shallow end of the brown stream, Michonne took the moment to look back in the direction of the town. The sky was clear. No smoke which meant no fire. The feed store never got set on fire by Glenn or Nicholas. Michonne felt her heart sink at the realisation that they were also gone.

“There’s no smoke but that doesn’t mean they didn’t make it.” Heath told her. They still could have escaped the herd without setting fire to any buildings.

“The herd is still coming but this creek should slow them down some.” Michonne commented, trying to stay focused on the task at hand.

As she made her way to join them she glanced down at the writing on her wrist. It was the note she had written for David back in the pet store.

_You’re getting home._

Michonne shuddered at the thought of his death. Though he had already been bitten, she had promised herself that she would make sure he saw his wife again before he died. She hadn’t been able to keep that promise. David hadn’t gotten home. He never would. She rubbed it off her skin.

As the three of them slowly made their way through the dirty water, their shoes occasionally getting stuck in the muddy sediment at the bottom of the creek, Heath lost his footing and separated from them. As he regained his balance he looked at his reflection in the water and saw that his face was covered in blood. He didn’t know whose blood it was. Now he understood what Michonne had meant back in the pet store.

 

Aaron walked down the street near the armoury. The community had fallen silent as the threat had faded. They weren’t sure if they had killed all the Wolves yet but the majority had been taken care of. It was a time for double checking the security of the houses and the community itself to make sure none of them were still lingering inside.

He came upon the bodies of three Wolves that Carol had killed and checked them. One of them had been killed with a gunshot to the chest instead of the head, so he lifted the head and stabbed it with his knife to be sure. They didn’t need any of the dead reanimating now that things had finally calmed down. Aaron rolled the body over and discovered his backpack.

It was the bag he used when he was out recruiting, the very same bag he had lost when he and Daryl were trapped in Del Arno Foods. Aaron lifted the bag and sat on one of the steps leading up to one of the houses. He opened the pack and found the envelope with the photos inside. Aaron opened the envelope and looked at the photos, they were in a different order than how he remembered which meant they had used the photos as reference for their attack.

Aaron’s hands shook and his legs trembled as his heart sank with guilt. If he hadn’t been sitting down he would have collapsed to his knees on the spot. They had lost at least twenty of their own and it was his fault. He had dropped his bag at the Wolves’ hideout and as a result had helped lead them right to their doorstep. He was devastated.

 

Rick brought the RV to a stop on Redding road. It was deathly silent in the surrounding woodland, not even the birds were singing. That lead Rick to believe the herd might be close which would mean Glenn would have to be nearby as well. He pulled out his walkie-talkie.

“Glenn, I’m in place by my best guess.” Rick told him down the radio. “You guys make it back yet?”

The radio hissed with static. There was no response. Rick took a deep breath, it didn’t necessarily mean anything.

“Glenn?” Rick repeated but was met with static again. “Tobin, you there?”

Yet again there was nothing but static. Rick felt his heart rate accelerate at the thought of being the only one left. He knew Glenn had separated from Michonne and the others so he had no way of knowing if they were okay. For all he knew they could all be dead and it would be his fault because it had been his plan.

“Daryl?” Rick tried, hoping Daryl, Sasha and Abraham were still alive and responsive.

“I’m here.” Finally came the reply down the radio, the sound of Daryl’s motorcycle engine in the background.

“It won’t be long now. They’re almost here.” Rick explained down the walkie-talkie. “We’ll get them going your way again.”

“How about that, Daryl?” Sasha spoke down the radio. “He’s gonna be coming our way.”

Rick paused for a moment as he heard more gunshots coming from Alexandria. The battle was still going on against whoever or whatever was attacking the community. It filled him with concern but getting the herd back on track was the priority.

“There’s gunfire coming from back home, we gotta sit with it and hope they can handle it. I think they can. They have to.” Rick told them down the radio, thinking of Carol, Jason, Carl, Morgan and Rosita who all knew how to fight. “We keep going forward for them, we can’t turn back because we’re afraid.”

Abraham’s voice sounded through the speaker. “We ain’t afraid.”

“This is for them, going back now before it’s done, that would be for us.” Rick told them as he waited on the approaching herd. “The herd has to be almost here.”

Rick grabbed some tissues from the compartment above his head and pushed them against the cut on his hand. The injury throbbed painfully with the pressure, especially when he fisted his hand to apply pressure to the wound. He would need to go to the infirmary when he got back. He sat and waited, catching his breath as sweat continued to drip off him and onto the floor. He listening to the walkie-talkie but only heard static. He was hoping to hear Glenn or Tobin by now. Rick pressed in the speaker and thought about what to say next.

Suddenly the back door of the RV swung open and the blonde Wolf shot at Rick with the gun he stole. Rick dived into the passenger seat to avoid the bullets, the shots being heard on the radio as he was still clutching it tightly. The gun clicked empty as it hadn’t been fully loaded to begin with. Rick let go of the radio and rushed down the RV towards the blonde Wolf, knocking the gun out of his hands before tackling him to the floor.

From where it sat on the front seat, Daryl’s voice could be heard calling Rick’s name down the radio. Rick tried to start punching the Wolf but another one came in behind him and grabbed Rick by the neck. The larger man managed to pull Rick back onto his feet as he fought to get out of the hold. As he struggled, Rick kicked the blonde Wolf in the head, knocking him unconscious so he could focus on the man behind him.

Rick held the man’s arm so he wouldn’t strangle him, growling with effort before spinning round and slamming the man against the door twice. His grip on Rick loosened, giving Rick the opportunity to spin himself out of the hold and elbow the man in the chest and then the face. The Wolf fell back against the dashboard as Rick pulled out his revolver and shot him in the head. He quickly spun round and shot the blonde Wolf in the head just as he was getting up.

Rick panted as he got his breath back, his body shaking from adrenaline. He never got used to near death experiences and he knew that had been a very close call. He holstered his revolver and stood over the body of the other Wolf. He recognised the W on his forehead, just like the walkers they had seen and the men Morgan had told him about.

Rick leaned down and searched the man’s pocket. He lifted out a jar of carrot baby food and felt the colour drain from his face. It was the same baby food they gave to Judith, which meant the gunfire from before must have been this group’s attack on Alexandria. Rick let out shuddering breaths as he thought about where the baby food could be found. It was either in the store room or in his house. If they had got it from the house then it might mean Judith, Carl and Jason were all dead. It would be the only reason these men got away. Rick was torn. He had to stay for the herd but every fibre in his being wanted to return to the community to make sure his family was safe.

Rick felt a vibration from the back of the RV and heard a dull thud. He looked at the driver’s side wing mirror and noticed three more people sneaking along the side of the RV. They were members of the same group and Rick didn’t know if they were armed or not. He moved as quietly as possible and lifted his Norinco rifle, gently pulling back the charging handle before aiming at the side of the RV. Rick opened fire wildly along the length of the driver’s side of the RV, glancing at the driver’s side wing mirror to make sure he had shot them all once his clip was empty.

Rick put his rifle back down onto the passenger seat and sat back down at the wheel of the RV. He could smell the stench of the herd in the air and the shots he had fired would lead the herd directly to him. He needed to be ready to get them moving when the walkers did eventually arrive. Rick panted from all the exertion and adrenaline as he turned the key in the ignition.

The engine stuttered and spluttered but didn’t start. Rick turned the ignition again but the engine simply stuttered and spluttered back at him for the second time. Rick felt panic creeping through him as he turned the ignition a third time only to have the engine splutter and groan in response. It wouldn’t start. That’s when he heard the rasps and snarls of the approaching herd. He was running out of time. A fourth turn of the ignition gave the same spluttered response.

Rick pounded his fist on the dashboard as he turned the key a fifth time. “Come on, come on, come on.”

The engine continued to splutter and whine at him.

“No, no, no no.” Rick muttered in fear as the engine refused to start for a sixth time.

He felt terror sweep through him as he turned his head to the right in time to watch the first walkers emerging from the treeline. The herd had finally caught up to him and it numbered in the thousands. Rick was in an RV that wouldn’t start, he was tired and had very little ammo and the herd was about to surround him. He had to act fast.

 

Jason opened the back door and stepped inside the house, closing the door behind him quickly. He looked round when he heard movement at the end of the small hallway and found Carl aiming his M4, lowering it when he realised it was Jason.

“Jason!” Carl gasped out in relief.

“I’m fine.” Jason answered with a smile.

As soon as Jason holstered his handgun and began to relax, the back door behind him flew open as one of the remaining Wolves burst in. Taking Jason by complete surprise, he knocked Jason forward and into one of the walls before wrapping some kind of wire around his neck in an attempt to strangle him. Jason’s back arched as he gasped for air, grabbing the bearded man’s hands in an effort to remove some of the pressure.

Carl took aim at the Wolf but the man kept Jason in the way, hiding himself behind Jason’s struggling form and stopping Carl from helping. Jason growled with effort as he held onto the man’s hands and fought with him. The Wolf was trying to lift Jason off his feet and get him on the floor so that the strangulation would be quicker but Jason refused to give up.

Carl never lowered his aim, patiently waiting for an opening so Jason decided to give him one. The older teen kicked against the wall as hard as he could, slamming the Wolf against the opposite wall before twisting himself round. As soon as he did, Carl had the Wolf in his line of sight and fired his M4, blasting a hole in the Wolf’s head. Blood and brain matter splattered over the wall as the body slumped to the floor while Jason collapsed to his knees, gasping for breath.

Carl lowered his gun and was about to make his way over to help when movement in his peripheral vision caught his attention. As soon as he turned to get a better look another Wolf slammed into him, grabbing the M4 and using it to smash Carl against one of the walls. Carl cried out in pain before growling as he wrestled with the psychopath. He refused to let go of his gun, knowing that if he did it would be the end for him.

“Carl!” Jason bellowed as he ran down the hallway and into the next room.

Carl glanced behind the Wolf to see Jason’s approach. The older teen rushed up to the Wolf, adrenaline and protective rage firing through him. No one hurt his boyfriend and got away with it. Jason grabbed the Wolf by the hair and pulled at the long, dark and dirty strands as hard as he could. The force he pulled with was so great that not only did it pull the Wolf’s body back but also ripped a clump of hair right out his scalp. Carl let go of the gun so that the Wolf would lose his balance and when he did, Jason hacked into his chest with his machete.

The Wolf hollered in pain as the blade cut deeply into his chest. Jason pinned him down on the floor with one of his boots and pulled the machete out only to slam it back into the man’s chest. The Wolf shrieked as blood splashed over the walls, floor and their clothes as Jason continued to hack into his chest, ripping him open in several places before finally splitting his skull in two halves with the blade.

Jason took a step back and dropped the machete to the floor, the metal clanging against the wood as he staggered back against the wall. The teen slid down the wall until he was sitting down, panting from the physical strain of the last half hour and the sudden lack of energy that followed the adrenaline rush. He looked up at Carl who was also breathing hard but appeared to be unharmed. Their eyes met. Neither of them said anything right away, they simple stared at one another as they calmed down.

 

Rosita, Maggie, Spencer and Deanna walked outside the wall at the extension where they had planned to plant seeds. It was where Richards had been attacked when the invasion started, having taken Maggie and Deanna by complete surprise. They kept their weapons at the ready in case the battle wasn’t over, even though the community had fallen silent.

“What happened today, that’s what it’s like out there?” Spencer asked Rosita, still in shock.

“Pretty much.” Rosita answered bluntly.

“How do you just live knowing that’s the world?” Spencer questioned, unable to comprehend living such a nightmare every day.

“This group, Abraham and this place.” Rosita replied. “Make sure you got something worth dying for.”

Rosita walked ahead, giving Spencer time to think about what he would be willing to die for. Ahead of them, Maggie walked up to the charred but reanimated corpse of Richards that was snarling up at them. She used her knife to stab it in the temple and end its second existence.

“We’re still here.” Maggie told Deanna. The community had been defended successfully.

“Not all of us.” Deanna remarked cynically.

 

Carol looked down at the body of Shelly Neudermeyer, her rag down and her gun holstered. The Wolves had been taken care of, the community had been defended but many residents had died in the process. Shelly may have been annoying but Carol would never have wished her dead, after all, she had been one of the people she had spent a lot of time with over the last two weeks. She picked up the packet of cigarettes that lay on the grass next to her parted skull.

Carol sat down on the steps of the porch. She hadn’t gone inside yet to see if Carl and Jason were still alive, though she assumed they were. She was glad that Jason had betrayed her orders and had gone outside to fight against the Wolves as there had been over thirty of the psychopaths attacking. Carol opened the packet and pulled out one of the cigarettes, sticking it between her lips. She tried her best to wipe the W off her forehead with her sleeve, no longer needing the disguise and not wanting any association, however false, with the barbaric animals that had attacked the community.

She glanced to the side and noticed that Sam had stamped the banister with the letter A, just like he had been doing for Rick and the others at the welcoming party. Carol didn’t know if he was still alive either. If he wasn’t, that would be yet another child she had failed to protect. First her daughter, then Lizzie and Mika and now perhaps Sam as well. They all looked to her for protection and guidance and she may have failed them all.

She hated the way the world was. It had an unlimited capacity for cruelty and brought out the worst in people. So many people that she had considered friends or family had been lost to the apocalyptic world. Carol herself had been lost to it, she was a shadow of her former self as she had been forced to embrace the monster inside her just to be able to live. For the first time in a long time, Carol felt tears stain her face.

 

Jason and Carl looked out the kitchen window at the street outside. From where they stood they could see the body of the Wolf they saved Ron from. The community was deathly silent with puffs of smoke rising up from the still burning fires and bodies littering the crimson streets. It had been a horrendous, vicious and violent attack but they had survived it.

“Is it over?” Carl asked, glancing back at the hacked up Wolf in the hallway.

Jason nodded, turning to Carl as blood continued to run down his face. “Yeah.”

“You should go to the infirmary.” Carl told his older lover. “That’s a really bad cut on your face.”

Jason smiled but winced when he did. “It’ll heal. I’ve had worse.”

Carl accepted the answer for the time being. Normally he’d be more stubborn and take Jason to the infirmary right away but he didn’t have the energy for it. He put down his M4 on the kitchen counter and walked into the front room.

“Enid?” He called out. He had lost sight of her just before Jason returned. “Enid?”

There was only silence. Jason also listened out for her but the house was as silent as the community outside. Judith was still asleep upstairs by some miracle. Carl looked around before discovering a small sheet of paper lying in front of the front door. He bent down and picked it up.

JUST SURVIVE SOMEHOW

He assumed it was Enid’s handwriting. Carl had made her promise not to say goodbye but it looked like she had decided to leave anyway. She had kept her promise of not saying goodbye. He felt his heart sink. After losing so many people in Alexandria to the Wolves, he had just lost a friend through their own choice.

Jason walked up behind Carl and glanced over his shoulder to read the note. He wouldn’t miss Enid but it did upset him to see Carl so visibly disappointed. Jason wrapped his arms around Carl’s waist and hugged him from behind. The younger teen leaned back into the embrace, seeking the comfort Jason brought to him.

“You okay?” Jason whispered in Carl’s ear.

Carl nodded, his head rubbing against Jason’s chest. “Yeah. What about you?”

Jason left a gentle kiss on the side of Carl’s neck, trying not to get the blood on him. “Just hungry.”

Suddenly, a loud buzzing rang through the house from the kitchen table. Jason reflexively let go of Carl and unholstered his gun before he realised what the ear splitting sound was. It was the timer that Carol had wound up for the casserole. Carl headed back into the kitchen as Jason holstered his handgun and turned off the timer. He then opened the oven and, using a dish towel, carefully lifted the tray out and placed it on the table.

Jason joined him as he closed the oven door. The smell of the casserole made their stomachs churn with appetite. The two teens stared into each other’s eyes again, both of them finally registering their ridiculous reaction to the timer going off. Jason started laughing first, which prompted Carl to let himself laugh. As they laughed, Jason pulled Carl into a tight hug, rubbing his back as their laughter slowly faded into gentle sobs as they grieved the dead.

 

Morgan walked down the street with his staff in hand. He was making one last patrol of the community to make sure there were no Wolves left and no walkers roaming around. Ahead of him there was a walker, a former resident, stumbling towards him with a cut throat. Morgan waited for it to get close enough before knocking it down with his staff and then stabbing it in the head with the end of his staff.

He glanced up at the open door of one of the houses. Most residents had barricaded themselves indoors so an open front door was suspect. Morgan ascended the steps and entered the house, walking slowly and brandishing his staff so that he would be ready for any potential attack.

Morgan walked down the hallway next to the staircase and stopped at the doorway of the living room. Something didn’t feel right. He took another step forward but froze when a loud scream came from the other side, a sickle slamming into the doorframe, having been intended for his head. Morgan smacked the Wolf’s arm with his staff and pushed him against the wall but the long haired man was stronger than him and pushed him back, causing them both to crash on top of the coffee table.

They rolled off the table and onto the floor with the Wolf quickly gaining the upper hand by pinning Morgan down and punching him repeatedly. Morgan managed to grab his fist and pulled him down before hooking him in the jaw, knocking the man off of him so that he could scramble to his feet on the other side of the front room.

When Morgan turned back round he suddenly recognised who the man was. It was the first Wolf he ever met, the strange and somewhat charismatic young man. The Wolf also recognised Morgan in that moment as well, remembering him as the man he tried to kill only to get humiliated and knocked out. The Wolf realised there was a reason for that.

“You can’t, can you?” He asked, understanding that Morgan wouldn’t kill. “You should’ve.”

The man lunged at Morgan who lifted his staff off the floor and tripped him with it. The Wolf slammed into the glass casing of a painting before slumping against the wall as he hit the floor. He tried to use his knife but Morgan knocked it out of his hand with his staff before slamming him back against the wall.

“I’m sorry.” Morgan said as he stood over him before spinning his staff and smacking him in the head.

 

Michonne, Heath and Scott emerged from the woodland and found the burnt buildings they were familiar with. They were the first buildings Michonne saw when her group first approached Alexandria on the main road. As they got closer to the community they realised something had gone terribly wrong in their absence.

They could see the large truck that had ploughed into the base of the watch tower and smashed into one of the walls. The loud horn from earlier now made sense to them as they realised it had been part of an attack on the community. Rising from inside the walls were puffs of grey and black smoke, signalling the presence of fires that had been lit in the community. Michonne unsheathed her sword and held it at the ready, not knowing what they were about to walk into.

 

As Sasha and Abraham continued to guide the front half of the herd further down the road as per the plan, they spotted Daryl emerging from another road. He rode up to them on his motorcycle after turning at the intersection between the two roads and continued to ride beside them as he had been doing before. Rick had already radioed to confirm that he was alive and the gunfire from the community had stopped. Daryl didn’t like not knowing what was going on but he still had an obligation to complete. They had to take the herd out another fifteen miles.

 

Morgan walked through the streets of Alexandria, passing by the mutilated and burning bodies that lay in the streets. They had a lot of cleaning up to do but at least all the Wolves had finally been taken care of. He spotted Carol walking down the street towards him, still dressed in her disguise but missing the hood and rag. She glared at him as she walked past but didn’t say anything. He hadn’t done what was necessary in her eyes. Morgan knew they wouldn’t agree on things so he remained silent and kept walking.

 

**So, chapter 26 is finally finished and is the longest chapter yet. I have been looking forward to writing the Wolves’ attack for quite a while so I hope it has turned out well.  
I felt the need to include all the other stuff that was happening at the same time for those few readers who don’t actually watch the show. This way they understand what’s happening. **

**As usual, leave a review/comment and let me know what you liked/didn’t like.**

**Thanks for all the kudos/votes/favourites/follows/bookmarks etc**

**Thanks to the reviewers of chapter 25: kingcarlgrimes, jar98, The_Man_Called_Madara, Sarah_94, jupav123, Kade, Musicrocksssss, TigerInTheMoonlight & The Sorrowful Deity.**

**Chapter 27 is going to be another big one and could be very dramatic :P**


	27. Who We Are

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alexandria attempts to return to normality after the Wolves' attack. However, the arrival of a massive herd of walkers creates tension among the residents.

 

Jason groaned with effort as he pulled the body of one of the Wolves who attacked across the floor. He and Carl had agreed to clear the bodies out of the house before the blood dried and stained the floor. The body of the man was heavy and the blood made it stick to the floorboards as Jason pulled it along by the legs. Jason’s face tensed with the effort which caused the slash to his cheek to burn as it opened wider.

“That’s not going to stop bleeding unless you go to the infirmary.” Carl told him as he grabbed the dead man’s arms to help the move.

“We can do this first, then I’ll go to the infirmary.” Jason replied with a huff of effort as they made it outside. “A cut to the face isn’t gonna kill me.”

Carl sighed and didn’t bother to respond. As far as he was concerned, stubborn should be Jason’s middle name because the older teen was ridiculously difficult sometimes. He grunted with effort as they worked together to lift the body onto a wheelbarrow where the other body already lay. Jason wiped his brow, smearing blood over his forehead because of the blood on his hands.

“At least we survived.” Jason commented with a loud huff as he relaxed.

“What about everyone else?” Carl questioned, concern suddenly hitting him.

“I’m sure our people are fine.” Jason replied as they headed back into the house. “Theirs, well, I’m not so sure.”

“We need to find out.” Carl insisted.

“And we will when I take the bodies to the graveyard.” Jason answered as the front door opened.

The two teens immediately snapped their vision towards the front door, both of them reaching for their weapons on reflex. They relaxed when they realised it was Maggie who had come by.

“Are you boys alright?” She asked with her thick country accent. “Nobody has seen either of you in a while.”

“We’re fine, just clearing out a couple of bodies.” Jason answered, wincing as his cheek continued to sting and bleed.

“That’s gonna need stitches.” Maggie commented, nodding her head towards the teen.

“That’s what I’ve been saying.” Carl added with a knowing smirk. He had someone on his side this time.

“And when Carol or Rick get back to take care of Judith, I’ll go to the infirmary.” Jason told them, raising his hands defensively.

“I can look after her.” Maggie suggested.

“She’s upstairs.” Carl told her before Jason could protest.

Maggie nodded and headed past them towards the staircase. Jason sighed and looked at Carl who was smirking in victory. He couldn’t help but shake his head and laugh. He wasn’t allowed to win when it came to his health.

“We’ll dump the bodies at the graveyard first, okay?” Jason told him as he headed for the back door.

“Fine.” Carl answered with mock exasperation followed by a light giggle.

 

Jason and Carl walked along the wooden porch and knocked on the infirmary door before entering the house. They looked around, finding the place to be almost identical to how it was when Pete was in charge. The last time either of them had been there was when Jason had hit his head in the fight with Pete.

“Hey!” A female voice called from the far side of the room.

The two boys turned to find a slightly overweight woman with dirty blonde hair and glasses standing by the bed. She dressed casually, blue denim jeans, long sleeved blue shirt and a white t-shirt on top of that. She looked at them nervously but with a warm smile all the same.

“Hi.” Jason greeted slightly awkwardly. “You must be the new doctor, right?”

The woman nodded hesitantly. “Yeah, I’m actually a psychiatrist. I went to med school but couldn’t finish the course because of panic attacks and…yeah.”

Jason raised an eyebrow at her story but chose not to speak his mind. “Right. So, what’s your name?”

“Oh, it’s Denise.” The woman replied, clearly embarrassed by having forgot to introduce herself.

“Well, Denise, I’m Jason and this is Carl.” Jason introduced.

“You’re Rick’s son, right?” Denise questioned Carl, clearly recognising him somehow.

Carl quickly nodded. “Yeah.”

“Everyone knows Rick.” Denise remarked before gesturing to the bed. “Take a seat and I’ll see what I can do about that cut.”

Jason nodded and did as he was told. Carl decided to sit beside him, though kept some distance in case Denise needed the space.

“Is that the only injury you have or is there more?” Denise asked as she rummaged in drawers for medical supplies.

“My back and sides hurt but I’m guessing it’s nothing.” Jason told her, earning a look from Carl.

Carl hated it when Jason didn’t tell him if he was in pain. He remembered forcing Jason to promise to tell him these things when they were on the road after he collapsed from not eating. Jason nervously looked away from Carl, realising he was in for another argument from concern later.

“Well, take your jacket and shirt off and I’ll take a look anyway.” Denise told him.

Carl felt a slight surge of possessiveness that he pushed down. Denise was a doctor, she had to physically examine Jason’s injuries so it was necessary. He couldn’t get angry over it, even if he was usually the only person who got to see Jason’s body.

Jason sighed and removed his leather jacket, then his red shirt and finally his long sleeved black shirt. He piled them on top of one another at the top of the bed, wincing slightly with the movements. The only thing left on his torso was the necklace around his neck, the other half of which was hanging around Carl’s neck under his shirt.

Denise returned and looked at Jason’s back and side. There was some bruising coming up but nothing severe, this was a good sign and meant that no bones had been broken. However, she grabbed a couple ice packs and handed them to Carl.

“Carl, can you place those over the bruises on Jason’s side and back?” She asked of him.

Carl nodded and did as he was told, taking sadistic pleasure out of Jason’s sudden intake of breath when the cold packs were applied to his skin, goose bumps breaking out all over. Jason quickly relaxed as he got used to the cold and let Denise get to work. He winced as she cleaned the cut on his cheek with alcohol on a cotton bud, having to use a few of them due to the wound still bleeding. Stitching the wound didn’t take long, the wound wasn’t too deep and wasn’t too wide either. After a few stitches, Denise was able to tie up the suture and move on to Jason’s other injuries.

“You were out fighting them, right?” Denise asked Jason as she cleaned up his lip the same way.

“Yeah. A couple of them came close to killing me too.” Jason replied almost nonchalantly. “But they didn’t.”

“How do you do that?” Denise asked as she moved onto Jason’s cut knuckles.

Jason thought about her question for a few moments. “You think of something or someone you want to protect. That’s what takes away the fear.”

“What do you want to protect?” Denise asked, dapping his knuckles and earning brief winces.

“I could say this place and the people here.” Jason replied with a sigh. “But honestly, when I was out there all I could think about was the young man sitting beside me right now.”

Carl couldn’t help but smile and blush at the same time. It had been a while since Jason had so vocally outed them to someone they didn’t know.

Denise finished his knuckles and stepped back a bit. “Oh, wait, so you two are…?”

Jason glared at her. “We’re in love, yes. Problem?”

Denise shook her head. “No, of course not. I just, I couldn’t tell. You know, at first.”

Jason’s eyes darted round the room, taking in all the subtle changes she had made to the infirmary along with watching people outside. He hissed as Denise cleaned the small cuts around his neck that had been caused by the Wolf’s attempt to strangle him.

“You know, I am a qualified psychiatrist.” Denise said hesitantly. “If you need to talk, I’m always here.”

“Why would I need to talk?” Jason asked, an almost reflexive defence.

“The tense shoulders, the hyper vigilance.” Denise replied as she finished tending to his wounds. “Those are symptoms, not habits.”

“Paranoia keeps you alive out there.” Jason deflected, uncomfortable with Denise’s prodding.

“You probably have nightmares and pains in your chest.” Denise continued as she took some painkillers out of the medicine cabinet.

Jason grit his teeth as he put his shirts back on. “I’m fine. I’m getting better on my own, thanks to Carl.”

Carl’s look of concern changed to one of pride when Jason’s hand rubbed his back affectionately. He knew he helped Jason but he wasn’t always aware of just how much.

“Look, all I’m saying is, I know what I’m talking about.” Denise defended herself as she handed him the painkillers. “If we talk it’ll be completely confidential.”

Jason hesitated before taking the painkillers. “Thanks.”

Denise smiled. “Try to put something cold on the bruises on and off for the next day or two. After that, it should be something warm. The stitches can come out next week.”

Jason nodded and turned to Carl. “What about you? The guy in the house didn’t manage to hurt you, did he?”

Carl shook his head. “No, I’m fine.”

Jason turned back to Denise. “Thanks for fixing me up.”

“Thank you for protecting this place.” Denise returned the gratitude.

“Carl and I are gonna check things out, make sure everyone is safe and make sure everything is over.” Jason told her as they headed for the door. “Hopefully we won’t have to come in here too often.”

“Hope not.” Denise agreed with a grin as they left.

The two teens left the infirmary, closing the door behind them and walked along the porch together. They stopped at the end of the porch and looked out at the street. There were still bodies lying around and blood stains on the ground but all the fires appeared to have been put out.

“Carl, you should look for Carol. Make sure she’s okay.” Jason suggested, turning to the younger teen. “I’m going to check on Gabriel and the people in his church.”

Carl nodded. It was him who had wanted to check everyone and now Jason was having them do that. The two teens shared a brief embrace before going in opposite directions through the community.

 

Jason knocked on the church door and waited. He heard the sound of the lock turning before the door opened to reveal Gabriel and some of his congregation. A fair number of them had survived and were relieved to see Jason at the door.

“It’s over.” Jason told them. “Alexandria is safe.”

Many of the people there started talking over him, all of them asking him if certain people they cared about were alive or dead. Jason barely knew any of the names so he simply put his hands up and scrunched his face up until they stopped demanding answers.

“I don’t know who is alive and who is dead.” He told them. “All the bodies are being taken to the graveyard so that’s the best place to find out.”

As the congregation flooded out onto the street in search of their loved ones and out of curiosity to see the chaos, Gabriel approached Jason with two guns in his hands. The guns were the same ones that Carol had given to him and Morgan, a Beretta 92 FS and a Glock 17. Neither of the guns had been used since Jason gave Gabriel the quick shooting lesson.

“I won’t be needing these now.” Gabriel told him with a nervous smile.

Jason took the Beretta back but hesitated on the Glock. He pushed it back into Gabriel’s hand.

“Keep that one here in the church.” Jason advised him. “In case anything happens again.”

“But I’m not good with guns.” Gabriel argued nervously.

Jason sighed. “You asked Carl for lessons, right? You want to learn?”

Gabriel swallowed and nodded.

“Then we’ll teach you and then you will be good with guns.” Jason told him. “We all have to start somewhere.”

Gabriel nodded. “Okay.”

Jason glanced outside, he could see some people crying as they identified one of the bodies to be friend or family. He turned back to the priest with a grim expression.

“You should get ready, Father.” Jason told him, addressing him formally. “A lot of people died today. You’re gonna be needed.”

Gabriel closed his eyes in sorrow and nodded. It was a dark day for Alexandria and his services would be needed at the funerals.

 

Back at the house, Carl sat on the sofa as he fed Judith from her bottle. He had found Carol on his way back to the house and had decided to feed Judith while she cleaned herself up. Carol soon descended the stairs in fresh clothes and without any blood on her face or hands. She had also returned to her usual stoic self and sat down on the couch opposite the sofa Carl was sitting on.

“I thought I told Jason to stay here.” Carol raised the subject abruptly. “What happened?”

Carl sighed as he bounced Judith on his knee. “I tried to get him to stay but then we saw Ron being chased by one of those men. We went out to help him.”

Carol listened intently with narrowed eyes.

“I told Ron he could stay here but he refused. He went home instead.” Carl continued. “Jason followed him to make sure he was safe. He stayed out after that.”

“And the blood on the floor?” Carol questioned, glancing over at the hallway.

“When he got back, two of them broke in here.” Carl told her, setting Judith down in her cot. “We fought them off.”

“We were lucky.” Carol commented. She would have to speak to Jason about it.

 

Jason didn’t even have to knock on the front door before a familiar chorus of barks announced his presence. He was checking in on Trisha to make sure nothing had happened to her after he had given her the shotgun during the attack. Brodie was on the other side of the door, barking and jumping up at the window in a desperate attempt to get to him. Jason couldn’t help but laugh at the lovable pup.

The door finally opened and Brodie jumped up at Jason, trying to lick his face. Jason laughed as he petted the dog and bent down so the lab didn’t have to jump up so much. He looked up at the doorway where Trisha stood with the shotgun still in her shaky hands.

“It’s over.” Jason told her, standing up. “We got them all.”

Trisha placed the shotgun down on the table and surprised Jason by hugging him. “Thank God! You’re a hero!”

Jason hesitantly hugged her back. “I’m not. It wasn’t just me who fought them.”

“But you fought them to protect us.” Trisha argued and kissed his undamaged cheek. “Thank you.”

Jason cleared his throat to try and shake the awkwardness of the kiss. He was glad Carl wasn’t around to see that as he was pretty sure not even Brodie could protect her from a jealous Carl.

“Look, Trisha, we lost a lot of people.” Jason told her grimly. “So, it’s not really a time for celebration.”

“I know.” Trisha sighed as one of her hands rested on his chest. “I just want you to be recognised for your heroic actions. Deanna did want to exile you before.”

Jason found the placement of her hand a little odd. “I’m not looking for recognition. I did what I had to do, that’s all.”

“Still a damn sight more than what most of the men here did.” Trisha remarked as her other hand remained on the back of his neck. “And some of them are almost twice your age.”

“It’s not a competition.” Jason commented before turning his head to the shotgun. “If you want, I’ll take the shotgun back to the armoury for you.”

Trisha reluctantly removed her hands from him so she could pick up the Compact Cruiser shotgun.

“You’re still to teach me how to survive.” She commented as she handed him the gun. “Once everything settles down again you should come by and do that.”

Jason checked the gun before resting it against his shoulder. “I will. I haven’t forgotten.”

As he turned to leave, Trisha spoke up again. “You know, if you’re ever at a loose end you’re always welcome to come by for a chat.”

Jason turned back to her with a somewhat suspicious glint in his eyes.

“And I’m sure Brodie would love the company, you know how much he adores you.” Trisha finished with a nervous laugh as the dog in question barked happily.

Jason laughed and nodded. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

 

“Jason!” Michonne’s voice called from the infirmary porch as Jason walked by.

The teen stopped and turned to the samurai as she and Heath walked out to meet him on the street. They had just gotten back and had left Scott in the infirmary with Denise, hoping his leg wasn’t infected.

“We heard about the attack.” Michonne told him. “What the hell happened?”

“A large group, mostly men, with Ws on their foreheads.” Jason explained, looking around at the remnants of the battle. “They climbed the walls and started killing people with Molotovs and bladed weapons.”

“Are Carl and Judith okay?” Michonne quickly questioned.

Jason nodded. “They’re fine. Me, Carol and some others took the fight to them. We were lucky they didn’t have guns.”

“What about everyone else?” Heath asked, concerned for his friends.

“Most people hid in their houses but we lost a lot of people.” Jason explained with a frustrated growl. “They took us by complete surprise.”

“Did Morgan make it back?” Michonne questioned, remembering Rick’s orders.

“Yeah, he was here.” Jason replied. “What the hell happened out there? Where are the others? I thought it was a dry run?”

Heath and Michonne lowered their heads. They had a lot of bad news.

“The quarry broke open so we had to do it. When that truck hit the wall, the sound of the horn pulled half of the herd off the road.” Michonne explained. “We lost people too and Glenn might be one of them.”

Jason rested his forehead against his hand as he closed his eyes. It was too much death for one day and Glenn was a great guy, one of the most trusted members of the group. He may not have spent much time with Glenn but he had nothing but respect for him.

“Where’s Rick?” Jason asked after a long silence.

“We don’t know. He doubled back to get the RV and redirect the herd.” Michonne explained. “But we have no way of knowing if it worked.”

“Daryl, Sasha and Abraham?” Jason asked, his voice shaking slightly. “What about them?”

“They had vehicles.” Michonne told him. “Last I saw them they were leading the front half away.”

Jason nodded. At least those three were most likely safe. Glenn and Rick could potentially be dead as there was no way of knowing for sure. He looked at the pair in front of him, they were covered in blood and sweat. They needed rest and a good clean up.

“Look, you two should get cleaned up and everything.” Jason suggested before placing a hand on Michonne’s shoulder. “I’ll tell Carl.”

Michonne stared at him, her eyes narrow. “Are you sure? You don’t have to.”

“I’m sure.” Jason replied quickly. “You’ve been through enough today. I’ll handle this bit.”

They nodded their mutual gratitude and headed off in different directions. Jason headed for the armoury to put the shotgun back while Heath headed home. Michonne headed down towards the front gate in search of Maggie, she had to tell her the bad news.

 

Jason opened the front door and quickly closed it behind him. He wasn’t sure if there were any gentler ways to explain the situation to Carl. He knew his younger lover could handle the truth, he was a child soldier because of the apocalypse, but that didn’t mean Jason couldn’t sometimes make an effort to soften the blow. It didn’t take long for Carl to rise from the sofa and wrap his arms around Jason.

“What’s wrong?” The younger teen asked, immediately sensing the concern from his older lover.

“Michonne got back.” Jason answered slowly. “I’ve got some bad news.”

Carl’s heart thudded in his chest. His mind immediately rushed to the worst possible news there could be. He tried to mentally prepare himself, the bad news probably meant that his father was dead. It was almost unthinkable, Rick had always appeared to be indestructible, just like Daryl and Michonne.

“My dad…” Carl whimpered. “Is he?”

Jason stroked Carl’s hair. “We don’t know. He could be fine but we have no way to know.”

“What happened?” Carl practically whispered, partially relieved that his dad’s death wasn’t confirmed.

“The quarry broke open and they put the plan into action. That truck’s horn pulled half the herd off the road.” Jason explained as he rubbed Carl’s back. “Your dad went back for the RV to cut them off but it looks like Glenn didn’t make it.”

“And the others?” Carl asked, his voice muffled as he was pressing himself into Jason’s chest.

“Daryl, Abraham and Sasha are using vehicles, so they’re believed to be fine.” Jason explained. “But most of the people who left this morning will never come back.”

“Rick’s came back from worse.” Carol commented from the staircase. “So has Glenn. We just need to wait.”

Jason and Carl separated but nodded in agreement. Carol narrowed her eyes at the older teen before stepping forward.

“Jason, can I speak to you for a minute?” She requested. “Alone?”

Jason nodded and kissed Carl’s forehead before following Carol out to the back of the house. Once they closed the back door behind them, Carol looked around for anyone who could be listening while Jason leaned against the door with his hands in his jacket pockets.

“I saw you out fighting those men.” Carol began. “I thought I told you to stay in the house with Carl.”

“You did but I couldn’t just sit inside and hide while people were being killed.” Jason responded with a glare. “That’s not who I am.”

“You could have got yourself killed.” Carol argued. “And you left Carl alone with Judith.”

“I didn’t. Enid was there with him.” Jason contested. “And you could have died just as easily.”

“You can’t be so reckless.” Carol warned him.

“I wasn’t being reckless. I knew what I was doing.” Jason retorted quickly. “Shane taught me how to shoot and the previous group I was with was led by a soldier. I’m not a kid, Carol. I was needed today.”

Carol stared at him, unsure how to counter his argument.

“I was needed today and I’ll be needed again in the future.” Jason told her. “My priority was keeping Carl safe. I did that by killing as many of those bastards as I could. Carl’s still here and I’m still here, that’s all that matters.”

Jason removed his hands from his pockets and headed back inside the house, leaving Carol outside to think about their short argument. He knew she had the best intentions but just because he took a back seat a lot of the times didn’t mean he wasn’t capable. It was insulting to him for anyone to think otherwise.

 

Deanna clutched the cool steel of the ladder as she slowly climbed up it. The community was almost completely silent, still in shock after the Wolves’ attack. Most people were busy cleaning up the streets, putting out the fires, collecting the weapons and moving the bodies to the graveyard. She ascended the ladder and stood on one of the many viewing platforms they had built around the walls. This one was next to the main gate and allowed her to look onto the abandoned main road that led to the community.

Eerily similar to the inside of the community, the street outside was just as silent as ever. The only sounds and movement were the leaves and branches of the trees rustling in the afternoon breeze. Deanna looked down at one of the panels on the wall, it was the first part of the wall that had been constructed by her husband, Reg. On the panel was a crude commemorative plaque that Reg had made at the time.

PNL #1  
R. MONROE

Deanna touched the plaque and momentarily closed her eyes. She missed him more every day. He had been her soulmate, the love of her life and life without him felt terribly empty. She took comfort in knowing that he was still protecting her with the wall he had built. Had it not been for the wall, things could have been so much worse. Regardless, she still felt the pain of loss scold her heart at the thought of her husband, her son and all the people who had died during the attack. They were all her people, her family and soon there would be more of them dead than alive.

“We got trapped in a town so he went with Nicholas.” Michonne’s voice caught Deanna’s attention.

In the street below her, Michonne stood with Maggie and Rosita as she explained to them what had happened after the herd broke apart.

“He had this idea that if he lit a fire it would stop the walkers from coming here.” Michonne continued. “And I tried to go instead. I wanted to. The fire never got lit and we had to keep going. I’m sorry.”

Maggie brought her hand up to her mouth in a mix of shock and grief. Her husband could quite possibly be dead and there would be no way of knowing for sure.

“He said if he got stuck he would find a way to send us a signal.” Michonne explained.

“A signal?” Maggie questioned rhetorically, wondering what kind of signal could be sent.

“Open the gate!” Rick’s voice suddenly echoed from the main road.

Deanna spun round on the platform and looked down the road that led to the main gate. She immediately spotted Rick coming over the slight hill at the far end of the road. He was running as fast as he could.

“Open the gate!” Rick shouted again.

Deanna’s heartrate increased when she saw what was also coming over the hill. Walkers. Lots of walkers. Rick was running away from a massive herd of walkers and had ended up leading them right back to the community. The smell of hundreds of rotting corpses quickly hit her nostrils and alerted everyone else to the incoming danger.

Deanna watched in horror as Rick ran towards them. He had obviously been running for a few miles as his shirt was dark and stuck to his body from sweat. Perspiration dripped off his head and face as he quickly changed direction to avoid the walkers that reached out to him from the sides of the road. The herd was only a few feet behind him and would catch up once his stamina ran out completely. The herd was massive, the stench was repulsive and the roar was horrifying.

Rick looked up at her as he desperately bellowed again. “Open the gate now!”

Deanna couldn’t. She was frozen on the spot with fear. A herd that size could take down the community and Rick was leading it right to their front door. Suddenly, she was snapped out of her fearful trance when the metallic screech of the gate opening reached her ears. She quickly made her way down the ladder as Michonne and Maggie opened the gate for Rick.

Rick could feel himself slowing down from exhaustion but his legs kept going thanks to the constant flow of raw adrenaline pumping through his bloodstream. He shoulder barged a female walker that was in his way, a decision he instantly regretted as he too dropped to the ground. He scrambled back to his feet and darted between three more walkers as he made the final dash for the gate. Michonne and Morgan guarded the gate for him as he reached it and collapsed against the right side wall as his legs finally gave in from the exertion.

As Michonne rapidly shut the heavy gate the herd slammed up against it. The stench was overpowering as the corpses reached between the bars and clawed the air in a failed attempt to grab the living people on the other side. The walkers snarled and roared hungrily as they snapped their teeth which they were unable to sink into living flesh for the time being. Deanna, Tobin and Bruce stared at the undead army at the gates in horror and amazement. They were now trapped inside the walls. Rick’s plan hadn’t worked.

 

Jason and Carl jumped when the front door flew open as Rick rushed inside the house. He was dripping with sweat with various large blood stains on his shirt and skin. His left hand was also crudely bandaged. His intense breathing seemed to steady when he laid eyes on Carl and Judith.

“Dad!” Carl exclaimed as he ran up and hugged his father.

“Carl! Are you okay?” Rick asked quickly. “Is Judith okay?”

Carl nodded as he broke the hug. “Yeah, we’re fine.”

“Are you alright, Rick?” Jason asked, tilting his head in concern. “You look rattled.”

“Some people tried to kill me, one of them had Judith’s baby food in his pocket and I thought…” Rick stuttered out as he tried desperately to get his breath back. “What happened?”

“A group attacked us, they had Ws on their foreheads.” Jason answered quickly. “They didn’t have guns so we managed to kill most of them. I guess a couple got away.”

“What about everyone else?” Rick questioned quickly, wincing as he clenched his left hand.

“We lost people but as far as we know our people are alive.” Jason answered. “What happened out there?”

“I tried to get the RV to lead half the herd away from here but those men shot it up.” Rick explained as his breathing slowly returned to normal. “I barely got back here alive.”

Jason and Carl looked at one another and then looked out the window at the crowd forming down at the main gate.

“The herd followed you back here.” Jason stated grimly.

“You should go to the infirmary.” Carl suggested, noticing his father’s injured hand.

“Yeah…” Rick trailed off.

“Go. We’ll head down to the gate and help make sure no one does anything stupid.” Jason told Rick with a trusting smile.

 

The remaining members of the community had all gathered down at the front gate. They could smell the walker herd behind the walls and they could hear the snarls, rasps and bangs against the metal. There were hundreds of hungry corpses on the other side of the wall which no longer seemed as strong and secure as it had before. Tobin and a few others had used large wooden beams to reinforce the segment of the wall that the Wolves’ truck had hit before.

Jason and Carl observed the faces around them. The two of them were used to walkers and were used to being in close proximity to them so they were calm. The wall would hold and if it didn’t, they had the rooftops they could flee to as an escape. However, the people of the community, still in shock from the attack earlier, were not looking so calm. Grief stricken and panicked faces surrounded them. Things were looking grim.

“You can hear it. Some of you saw it.” Rick called to everyone as he returned from the infirmary with his hand bandaged. “They got back here, half of them. Still enough to surround us twenty deep.”

Everyone’s faces fell at the news. Terror was seeping through them at the mere idea of the walkers getting inside the walls. Jason furrowed his brow as he watched Rick explain the situation. Half the herd was a lot, if he remembered right that easily put the number in the thousands. That was grim even by his past experiences with large herds.

“Look, I know you’re scared. You haven’t seen anything like this. You haven’t been through anything like this. But we’re safe for now.” Rick continued, one of the few confident people there. “The panel the truck hit seems intact, we reinforced it just in case. Either way the wall’s gonna hold together. Can you?”

The question was met with silence. People were afraid and in shock. Most of them wouldn’t be able to hold it together so it would be the responsibility of those with experience to help them.

“The others, they’re gonna be back.” Rick stated, addressing another concern people had.

“They’re gonna be back.” Rosita repeated with confidence.

“Daryl, Abraham, Sasha, they have vehicles. They’re gonna lead them away just like the others.” Rick explained. “And Glenn and Nicholas are gonna walk back through the front gate after. They know what they’re doing and we know what we need to do.”

Jason rested a hand on Carl’s shoulder. He knew the younger teen was worried about his friends just as much as the rest of them were. They both knew how dangerous the outside world was so they didn’t share Rick’s raw optimism. He was so focused on Rick’s speech that he didn’t notice Ron glaring at them.

 “We keep noise to a minimum. Pull our blinds at night, even better, keep the lights out.” Rick explained. “We try to make this place as quiet as a graveyard and see if they move on.”

“This place is a graveyard.” Francine commented cynically, much to the agreement of the others.

Rick nodded, accepting that what they had been through was awful. He realised that he often forgot that not everyone was used to fighting for their survival.

“The quarry broke open and those walkers were heading this way. All of them.” Aaron spoke to the crowd, feeling the atmosphere was one-sided. “The plan that Rick put into place stopped that from happening. He got half of them away.”

Many of the people looked over at Rick. They had been so consumed by fear at the sight of the herd that they had forgotten it was only half the original number. Had it not been for the Wolves’ attack then all of the walkers would have been led away by Rick’s plan.

“I was out there recruiting with Daryl and I wanted to get into a cannery and scavenge but Daryl wanted to keep looking for people.” Aaron confessed, guilt eating him up. “We did what I wanted and we ended up in a trap set by those people and I lost my pack. They must have followed our tracks. Those people who attacked us, they found their way back here because of me.”

Everyone, including Jason and Carl, were surprised by the confession. As everyone’s shock wore off, Jason could feel the animosity building in the atmosphere. These scared people were looking for someone to blame and Aaron was offering himself up like a sacrificial lamb. He wouldn’t allow it. Jason stepped forward.

“That may be true but you wanna know the truth? This would have happened eventually no matter what.” Jason told them, challenging the safety of their community. “Those people were successful because we weren’t ready for such an attack. We’ve been sitting ducks behind these walls for far too long.”

Jason could feel the angry glares he was receiving from many of the residents while others were shocked by his statements.

“You’re blaming us?” Bruce snarled. “Easy for you to blame us. You didn’t lose anyone you cared about.”

Jason turned to him and glared back. “I could have hid or run but I didn’t. I was out here fighting them. I was trying to save lives, so was Carol, so was Morgan, so was Aaron, so was Rosita. I didn’t see you doing that.”

Jason held his glare for a few more moments before turning back to everyone, looking around at the hurt expressions.

“We lost a lot of people today. Good people who we cared about. They died so that we could live.” Jason continued, his tone soft. “So we owe it to them to learn from this, to change things so that this community will always be protected. Let their sacrifice prevent this from ever happening again. Don’t let them die for nothing.”

Rick nodded as Jason’s speech finished and everyone took it in. It was a lot more heartfelt than he was used to wording things but it was the right message. The solemn silence of the crowd proved to him that this was the one speech that had been well received.

“There’ll be more to talk about.” Rick told them, glaring at Morgan.

Deanna closed her eyes and shook her head in disgust. She was partly to blame for all of it. She had been against arming people inside the walls. She had been totally naïve to proper security. Her people were weak and their community was hardly protected beyond the impressive wall that surrounded them. She slowly walked away from the crowd. She had to get away from them.

“Deanna?” Tobin called, noticing her move away. “Deanna?”

She never responded. She just kept walking.

 

Jessie returned home and sighed as she took in the sight of the dead body lying on the kitchen floor. The female Wolf who had tried to kill her and her family, who forced her to stab the woman to death with a pair of scissors, now lay dead in a pool of blood. Jessie bent down and grabbed the corpse by the legs before slowly dragging it out of the house, the blood trailing behind her.

Fortunately, the graveyard wasn’t far from her house so it didn’t take her long to drag the body up the hill and onto the grass covered square. Fresh graves had already been dug while a pile of Wolf bodies lay in the corner next to a couple wheelbarrows and covered in blue tarp. Jessie scratched her head before picking up a shovel and preparing to dig, there were a lot of graves to fill.

Rick walked into the graveyard carrying a body wrapped in green tarp, one of their own. One of her friends.

“Don’t.” He told her as he set the body down. “We don’t bury killers inside the walls.”

“We aren’t going out there.” Jessie answered with a shake of her head. “So what do we do?”

“We wait.” Rick replied, earning an understanding nod from Jessie.

They had time.

 

Jason waved to Olivia as he and Carl entered the armoury. With the constant threat of walkers at the gate Jason had decided it was time to be more prepared in case the unthinkable happened and the herd somehow got inside the walls. Carl had reloaded his Beretta 92FS and had it holstered on his thigh. He leaned against the wall and watched his boyfriend.

Jason was busy filling two extended magazines with 7.62x39mm bullets for his AKMSU. Although the magazines were large when they were extended, the bullets disappeared fast as he had quickly ran empty when fighting the Wolves. Once the two magazines were full he pocketed them and collected an extra magazine for his TRP Operator, filling it with .45 ACP bullets. The last gun he needed to reload was his Taurus 909 that he always kept in his inside jacket pocket.

“I know the walls will hold against the herd but I’d rather be prepared.” Jason commented to Carl as he finished loading the magazines.

“Yeah.” Carl responded with a sigh.

Jason turned to him as he pocketed the magazines. “What’s up?”

“Nothing.” Carl shrugged and looked out the window.

Jason closed the gap between them and placed both his hands on Carl’s shoulders. He stared into Carl’s eyes, as if he was staring into Carl’s soul. He held his stare for what felt like an eternity before closing the distance and placing a soft kiss on Carl’s lips. Carl returned the kiss just as gently, conscious that Olivia was in the other room and waited for Jason to speak again.

“I know when something’s bothering you.” Jason commented. “You can tell me what it is, you know I won’t judge you.”

Carl sighed and knew there was no avoiding it. “Enid. She’s still out there and now the herd is keeping her away.”

“And you’re worried about her.” Jason finished for him.

Carl nodded and looked down at the floor, the feeling of powerlessness spreading through him.

“I’m sure she’ll be fine until we find a way to get rid of the herd.” Jason tried to assure him but he could tell Carl wasn’t convinced.

“There’s dangerous people out there, just like those people. You know that, Jason.” Carl argued, looking back up at the older teen. “And that’s a lot of walkers. Anything could happen to her.”

“I think she’s smart enough to stay out of sight for now.” Jason commented. “There’s a town not far from here, I went there with Daryl recently. That’s where I’d go if I got stuck out there.”

“How far away is it?” Carl asked quickly.

Jason shrugged. “Couple miles east of here, I think. I didn’t count.”

Carl lowered his gaze as he thought about it. A couple miles wasn’t far and he was sure Enid was smart enough to go there to avoid the herd.

“Besides, we can’t go anywhere with that many walkers at the walls.” Jason added, tucking some of Carl’s hair behind his ear. “Okay?”

Carl nodded. “Yeah.”

 

 “I can’t even make two meals out of this!” Barbara argued.

There was a small crowd standing at the garage entrance to the pantry, all of them squaring up against Olivia as fear had won them over. They were all terrified that the walls would come down because of the herd outside and no longer wanted to respect routines or rations.

“The sauces can be stretched out with some extra water.” Olivia responded to the angry red headed woman.

“What difference does that make if we’ll be dead tomorrow?” The dark haired woman, Anna, spoke up.

Olivia sighed, she was fighting a losing battle. “We have to ration now.”

“I can’t.” Bruce walked up to her. “Can’t spend whatever time I have left watching my family starve.”

“Wait!” Olivia pleaded as the large man stepped past her.

“I’m sorry.” Bruce added before entering the pantry.

The rest of the people followed him. They would take everything they could for themselves so that they and their families would survive before the walls came down.

“Sorry, Olivia but I just don’t see the point.” Kent remarked as he too entered the pantry.

Deanna watched what was happening. It was the beginning of anarchy and she didn’t have the strength to stop it. Olivia looked over to her in desperation before sighing in defeat. Not even Deanna would stand up to them at this point.

“Hey! Hey! Stop! Right now, stop it!” Spencer shouted at them as he entered the pantry. “This stuff is for everyone! We need to make it last if we’re gonna survive!”

“Why don’t you make sure the gate’s closed, Spencer?” Bruce snarled vindictively, referencing the night of the meeting.

“Yeah, that was me. I did that.” Spencer responded. “But that truck outside the walls, it would be inside if it wasn’t for me. I did that too.”

Spencer glared at them all as they stopped grabbing food and supplies to listen to him.

“If I didn’t, maybe we wouldn’t be talking right now.” Spencer continued before challenging the other man. “Where were you, Bruce?”

It was the same question that Jason had levelled at him earlier. Spencer, Jason, Carol, Aaron, Rosita, Morgan and Maggie had all been out fighting the Wolves. No one had seen Bruce do anything. He had been hidden away in his house, hoping that no one broke in. Like a coward.

“Doing this will start us down a road where nothing matters, where no one else matters.” Spencer asserted. “And then we’ll all look back on this moment now as when we destroyed this place.”

Everyone in the pantry thought about what he had said and it was true. The threat had always been just outside the walls but they were all so used to being snug and cosy in their houses that they failed to realise it. Death was always just around the corner, they hadn’t cared before so there was no reason to suddenly panic now. They put everything back and gradually filed out of the pantry.

Spencer turned around to look at the grim expression on his mother’s face. Though she didn’t say anything and was clearly still upset, there was a glimmer of pride and hope in her eyes. All was not lost.

 

Ron sat cross-legged on the grass outside his house, repeatedly stabbing the ground with his knife. Carl spotted him and walked up to him. Jason may not agree with helping Enid but he was sure that Ron would. After all, he had known her the longest.

“Hey.” Carl greeted. “You okay?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” Ron hissed back.

Carl pursed his lips at the response. “Have you seen Enid?”

“Not since I saw her with you.” Ron replied with the same abrasive tone as he continued to stab the ground.

“I think she went over the wall just before the herd came and now she’s trapped out there.” Carl explained, voicing his concerns.

“What makes you think she isn’t dead?” Ron snarled cynically.

“Come on, man.” Carl replied with a sigh. Ron knew her better than that.

Ron sheathed his knife and snorted in disbelief at Carl as he stood up. Carl had some nerve to come to him asking about Enid, given how he had been gradually leading her away from Ron since he arrived. Ron had seen how close they got, the long talks and the understanding nods. They were alike and Carl understood her better than he ever could. She had left him because of Carl and the only thing stopping them being together was obviously Jason. Ron could see Carl was as two faced as his father.

“Look, I’ll go find her. I just need your help.” Carl explained, following him as he walked. “We could climb up…”

“I’m not helping you, Carl.” Ron snapped, turning round to face him.

“This isn’t for me.” Carl argued. “It’s for Enid, your friend.”

“My girlfriend.” Ron corrected him aggressively. “Or I mean cause she was, anyway, right?”

“So, you just wanna leave her out there?” Carl questioned just as aggressively, angry at how no one seemed to care.

“I told her to stop going over the wall. I told her there’s bad people out there.” Ron retorted impatiently. “And that it is stupid and dangerous.”

“Not if you know what you’re doing.” Carl corrected him.

Ron glared at him. “Well, I’m not gonna let you go.”

Carl shook his head and turned around. It was the same response that Jason gave him and he was sick of it. He would do it on his own.

“Carl!” Ron called after him as he followed him. “Carl, you’re not going out there!”

Ron closed the distance between them and grabbed Carl’s shoulder. Carl instantly whipped around and shoved him back with both hands.

“Back off!” Carl growled. He’d had enough.

Ron pushed him back, challenging his anger. Carl rushed forward and shoved into him but Ron caught him, stopping his momentum and turned it into a shoving match. The two boys grunted and growled at each other as they tried to overpower the other. Carl suddenly remembered a couple little tricks that Jason had taught him and decided to put them to good use.

Carl relaxed a little, just enough to allow Ron to dominate the shoving match a little more. As soon as he did, he slipped one of his feet behind Ron’s ankle and then pushed forward as hard as he could. It was enough to tip Ron off balance and send him crashing to the ground on his back. The blonde haired teen wheezed as he hit the ground. Carl glared down at him as he fixed his shirt and turned to walk away.

“I’ll tell Jason and your dad. They’ll go out to find you and then other people will too.” Ron threatened him. “And then somebody’s gonna die and it could be Jason.”

Carl stopped walking and glared back at him. Rick and Jason could survive perfectly well outside the walls. How would Ron know when he’d never been out there? Carl felt a shiver go down his spine as he realised that nothing was certain in the world, that either one of them could die if they went looking for Carl without thinking.

“You saved my life and now I’m saving yours.” Ron answered, looking up at him.

Carl continued to glare before shaking his head and heading home. Ron was wrong. He’d go out on his own and find Enid. No one would die and at least she’d see that one person cared, even if it was just Carl.

 

As Jason finished up a perimeter sweep before heading back to the house, he stopped when he spotted three members of the community painting on one of the wall panels. It confused him so he made his way up onto street level to get a better look without disturbing them. He quickly realised they weren’t painting but were in fact writing and using the wall panel as a memoriam panel. Jason took a moment to read it.

IN OUR MEMORY

DINESH        BOBBY  
JEFFERY       DAN  
CARTER        SAMANTHA  
HOLLY          PARK  
SHELLY        CHARLYNE  
RICHARDS   OHARA  
HELEN          DAVID  
STACY          STURGESS  
MICHAEL     ADRIAN  
BARNES        NICHOLAS

Jason slowly read all the names, giving a few moments of silence for each one. He only recognised a couple of the names, the rest were faceless in his memory but he honoured their sacrifice all the same. When he noticed Nicholas’ name, he couldn’t help but shake his head. That was one man he wouldn’t miss.

Jason paused for thought when another name was written on the wall. Glenn. He thought about the pleasant Asian man he’d known since Terminus. He knew Glenn was a good guy, nobody ever had anything bad to say about him and if he truly was gone then it was a tragic blow for the group. Jason found himself flooded with regret for not getting to know Glenn better. All he knew was that he was Maggie’s husband and he loved Portal.

_“Do you think you’ll ever get married, you know, in the future?” Glenn asked Jason as he searched various drawers._

_Jason stepped over one of the walker’s corpses as he placed some cans in his bag._

_“I thought they didn’t approve of that before.” Jason commented, referring to the debate over gay marriage._

_“The old world is gone.” Glenn answered with a shrug. “So, would you?”_

_Jason thought for a moment as he searched another cupboard. “I don’t see the need really. I’m his and he’s mine. That’s enough for me.”_

_“You still gave him that necklace to match yours.” Glenn pointed out. “You wanted something to represent your relationship.”_

_Jason smiled and conceded with a nod. “Well, I’ll let Carl decide on the whole marriage thing.”_

_Glenn’s face turned serious, remembering how easily he nearly lost Maggie on several occasions._

_“Don’t leave it too long.” He warned. “We never know what’s going to happen.”_

Jason remembered that conversation with Glenn vividly. Perhaps the older man had a point that he should have thought about more seriously. It was odd for Jason, having been in a relationship for years with Kellin, to feel so close to Carl after a couple months and nothing more. The apocalypse had a strange way of stripping away all the nonsense and leaving the core of people exposed. Perhaps making some kind of gesture along the lines of marriage wasn’t so ridiculous an idea after all, even if Carl was young in age he was much older in terms of maturity. It would be another awkward conversation to have with Rick though.

Jason shook his head and decided to leave the thoughts aside for another day. He headed across the street and up the stairs and onto the porch of their house. He was surprised to find Carl sitting on one of the garden chairs brooding while Judith slept in her stroller.

“Hey.” Jason greeted with a lowered voice, conscious of how loud his footsteps were on the wooden floor.

“Hey.” Carl greeted just as lowly, watching the older teen sit himself next to him.

“Ron’s a shit boyfriend.” Carl grumbled as he sank into the chair more.

Jason raised an eyebrow and smirked. “I wasn’t aware you two were an item.”

Carl glared at him but couldn’t help but smile at Jason’s sarcastic humour. “If I was out there like Enid, you’d want to look for me, right?”

Jason’s expression turned serious. “Of course. Not even a million walkers would keep me from finding you.”

“Then Ron’s a shit boyfriend.” Carl repeated.

Jason took Carl’s hand in his own. “Tell me what happened.”

“I asked Ron to help me look for her.” Carl sighed, knowing Jason would disapprove. “We ended up having a fight.”

“A fight? Do I need to have a word with him?” Jason asked quickly, not willing to tolerate anyone harming Carl.

Carl shook his head. “I started it. I just feel like no one cares. I know you hate her so you won’t help.”

Jason raised his other hand defensively. “I don’t hate her exactly but that’s not why I’m not rushing out to save her.”

“Then why aren’t you helping?” Carl asked, a slightly aggressive twinge to his tone.

“Because you’re my number one priority.” Jason explained sincerely, pulling Carl into a hug. “I’d rather wait for those things to leave before looking for her.”

“But what if she needs our help?” Carl argued, leaning into the embrace.

“Then a suicide mission isn’t the way to do it.” Jason replied. “I promise, as soon as there’s a chance to go out looking, I’ll find her for you.”

Carl didn’t say any more. He simply pulled Jason closer to him as they watched the community from the porch.

 

Deanna sat in her study with an A3 sheet of paper spread out on the table in front of her. They were the extension plans she had been working on for the community but at the moment they felt pointless. It wouldn’t matter if they were always coming under attack, always losing people and being generally defenceless. She took a deep breath as pain shot through her chest. It was a pain she had become familiar with since Aiden died. Heartbreak. The pain of loss.

She twirled her husband’s old wedding ring in her hand as she thought about her pain and her broken family. Anarchy was brewing in the town and her once happy family was in pieces. Looking at the wedding ring reminded her of something Reg used to say whenever things went bad. It was his favourite Latin phrase and the meaning of it suddenly hit her. Now was not the time to be defeated but instead to move forward. There would be a life after these problems and she’d make sure of it.

She took a pencil out of the plastic cup she kept her stationary in and started drawing more extensions onto the plans and labelling them. Areas for different crops and vegetables, areas to plant fruit trees, an educational area for medicine, weapons training and other survival strategies. She continued writing down and drawing all the plans that came into her head as her mind was finally clear. Once she was done she wrote down Reg’s Latin phrase at the bottom as a tribute to him.

DOLOR HIC TIBI PRODERIT OLUM.

She smiled at the Latin words until she heard something smash in the kitchen. When she left her study, walked down the hallway and entered the kitchen she found Spencer kneeling on the floor picking up shards of glass. He had dropped the glass and smashed it.

“Spencer?” Deanna questioned in concern for her remaining son.

“Yeah…I…my bad.” Spencer answered with slightly slurred speech as he put the glass shards into the glass and stood up.

“Are you drunk?” Deanna asked with a motherly tone of disappointment.

“Getting there.” Spencer replied and walked over to the sink, placing the broken glass in the basin.

Deanna looked at the case of bottles and food that sat on the kitchen worktop. She recognised the supplies immediately.

“This came from the pantry.” She stated, feeling betrayed by Spencer’s earlier words to the community. “You stole it?”

“I wouldn’t call it that.” Spencer replied as he retrieved a new glass and poured himself another drink.

“So, what you told everyone, that was just bullshit?” Deanna asked him, disappointed.

“No. If they all went in and raided the pantry and everyone knew it, saw it, then that would be the end.” Spencer explained with drunk logic. “But one person? One person that no one ever would know.”

Spencer finished pouring his drink and held up the glass.

“So, why not me? I stopped that little run at the bank, I deserve a reward. One last celebration.” Spencer continued, turning to Deanna. “Cause they were right, mum, and you know it. We’re all gonna be dead real soon.”

Deanna glared at him, her disappointment giving way to frustration. “Dammit Spencer!”

“Me? Now that is some bullshit! You’re the reason we’re so screwed, you made us this way!” Spencer shouted back, slamming the empty glass down. “We were never safe here but you didn’t wanna see that! You didn’t want us to see that! You just wanted to dream! What happened to dad, to Aiden? That’s all you!”

Deanna reeled back in shock and grief. The wounds were still very raw and her earlier optimism had just been crushed by her angry son. Spencer was frozen on the spot, his expression softer as he realised that what he said hadn’t been completely true and was unfair given the circumstances. Despite this, he couldn’t muster the strength to apologise so he just walked away while Deanna packed away the stolen goods.

 

Carl had given Jason permission to go for a walk around the perimeter of the community yet again. He was being very safety conscious but he also needed time alone to sort out his thoughts. As much as he wanted Carl to be happy it conflicted with his hatred of Enid, the girl who had tried to manipulate Carl into kissing her. Jason would never forget watching her do that. He didn’t care what traumatic events she had been through, he hated her attitude and he wasn’t afraid of showing it.

However, he also understood her importance to Carl as a friend he could relate to so he had a duty to Carl to find her. If he could find her on his own then there was always the possibility for an accident to happen. Jason cursed at himself, annoyed that such a thought could casually cross his mind. It may have been something he would do if he was alone or if Carl wasn’t interested in Enid in any way, but he was. It would hurt Carl if something happened to her so Jason couldn’t let his darker desires take control.

Jason trusted Carl. He had to and he had no reason not to trust his boyfriend. The same was true for Carl, he trusted Jason explicitly. Jason smirked in amusement, it was a miracle Carl still respected him so much considering the number of times he had lied to him by now. The lies may have been with the right intentions but lies were still lies. It was more proof to Jason just how special Carl was and how much more relevant Glenn’s suggestion was becoming. Perhaps it was a conversation worth having with both Carl and Rick.

A sudden scream shook Jason out of his thoughts. He instinctively reached for his TRP Operator handgun that sat in the thigh holster as he looked towards the source of the scream. A small crowd had gathered in front of the houses where Jessie stood on the porch. Inside the house, banging on the window, was an undead Betsy. She had killed herself after hearing of her husband’s death.

Jason made his way over but stopped when he saw Jessie take out her knife and slowly open the front door. Betsy’s reanimated corpse stuck its head out, snarling and biting at her as she slowly shoved the knife through its eye. Betsy’s body dropped to the ground and Jessie turned to the small crowd that consisted of Bruce, Denise, Olivia, Barbara, Anna, Tobin and others.

“I used to not wanna see the way things are. It’s not that I couldn’t, it’s that I didn’t want to.” Jessie told them. “But this is what life looks like now. We have to see it. We have to fight it. If we don’t fight, we die!”

Jason smirked as she mirrored Rick’s earlier words. She understood how it had to be, she was changing for the better. Their eyes met and Jason nodded to her in approval before she descended the steps and walked down the street. Jason turned around to continue his perimeter patrol and was startled when he discovered Michonne standing behind him.

“Don’t startle me like that!” Jason hissed jokingly.

Michonne laughed at his reaction. “You okay?”

Jason calmed down and placed his hands in his jacket pockets as they walked together. “Yeah, I’m fine. You?”

“I’m okay too.” Michonne replied, looking ahead of them. “Still seeing things?”

Jason shrugged. “Haven’t in a while, so I guess things are better.”

“That’s good.” Michonne commented with a smile.

“Yeah. Opening up to Carl helped a lot actually.” Jason explained. “I guess I feel more secure having people I can really trust.”

“We’re a family, that’s how it should be.” Michonne told him seriously.

“Yeah, amazing how things change like that.” Jason remarked. “I wouldn’t have believed it three months ago. You know, before I met any of you.”

“You mean before you met Carl.” Michonne corrected him with a grin.

“No, that isn’t fair.” Jason retorted with a grin of his own.

“Yes it is!” Michonne argued, playfully punching his arm. “I’ve seen the way you look at him.”

“So?” Jason countered. “I’m sure someone will look at you like that too.”

“Why’s that?” Michonne questioned, trying to make him uncomfortable for her own amusement.

“You’re strong, independent, loyal, smart, funny and wise.” Jason told her, lowering his voice a little. “Not to mention beautiful. Someone will notice all of that eventually.”

Michonne hadn’t expected him to actually explain his point. He was far more secure than she had originally given him credit for and found herself falling silent before the compliments. She did yearn for someone to see her in a less platonic light but the options were limited in the apocalypse. Michonne also wasn’t sure she could stand being hurt again.

 

Rick stood on the viewing platform closest to the main gate, the same one Deanna had been standing on when he had arrived with the herd. He looked down at the hundreds of hungry corpses as he spoke into his walkie-talkie.

“Daryl, Abraham, Sasha, do you copy?” Rick called but received nothing but static.

“Hey, Rick?” Ron’s voice called from the bottom of the ladder. “Can I come up?”

Rick nodded. “Yeah.”

Ron quickly climbed the ladder and stepped onto the platform. He held his breath momentarily as the stench hit him harder than on ground level. He looked out at all the walkers, all of them snarling and stretching their arms out towards them. It was arguably the most horrendous thing he’d ever laid eyes on.

“You haven’t seen it.” Rick stated, recognising the reaction all too well.

“No.” Ron replied, unable to take his eyes off it. “Enid, she…she used to sneak over the walls, spend time out there. I mean, I don’t know why she just wanted to but I think she went out there after the attack.”

“What? She’s still out there?” Rick questioned in disbelief. What a stupid girl.

“Yeah. We don’t know where she is, you know but she knows how to take care of herself.” Ron explained, earning a suspicious glare from Rick. He didn’t believe it. “And we can’t go out there. Carl wanted to try, I stopped him. I told him I’d tell you if he did and then…I don’t know, I just thought I should tell you anyway.”

“Do you know where he is now?” Rick asked him quickly. He wouldn’t put it past Carl to try something like this.

“Yeah, he’s back at the house. I saw him on the porch with Judith.” Ron answered.

Rick nodded in relief but he needed to talk to his son.

“I can keep guard, if you want.” Ron offered, sensing Rick’s frustration.

“Down there? They’re guarding the place now.” Rick explained. “This is just about keeping an eye out for the others that aren’t back. Looking for a sign from Glenn.”

“Alright.” Ron responded. He could keep watch.

Rick nodded and headed for the ladder. “Thank you.”

“So, I was thinking about what you said back at the quarry and I mean, you’re right, I need to know how to protect myself, my mum, my brother. This place.” Ron asked nervously. “So, can you teach me how to shoot?”

Rick thought about it for a moment. He found it odd that Ron would come to him, the man who had killed his father, instead of someone like Jason. He let it slide and unholstered his Colt Python, opened the chamber and pocketed the bullets before slamming the chamber back into place.

He held the gun out, aiming towards one of the walkers. “There’s your target.”

Ron held the gun and aimed it at the walker. It was heavier in his hands than he expected, causing his aim to move around as he tried to steady his aim by tensing his grip. It wasn’t working.

“Just relax.” Rick advised him, noticing the tension. It was a common mistake.

 

Jason and Michonne rounded the corner onto the street and made their way to the house. As they reached the house they met up with Rick who was walking up the street from the main gate. They nodded to each other in silent greeting as they made their way up onto the porch. To their surprise, they found Carl asleep on the garden chair, a sight which Jason always found adorable. He supressed his urges and shook Carl’s shoulder.

“Wakey, wakey, sleepy head.” Jason greeted him teasingly.

“Hey.” Carl greeted groggily and then noticed Michonne and Rick were there too. “What’s going on?”

Rick glanced out onto the street before pulling out one of the other garden chairs so he could sit at the table opposite his son. Michonne rested herself against the banister of the porch while Jason sat down next to Carl but kept his attention on Rick. The man obviously had something important to say to his son.

“Ron told me about Enid.” Rick stated. “He also told me you were planning on going out there.”

“Because no one seemed to care.” Carl retorted quickly before his father could mount an accusation.

Rick nodded, he could understand his son’s frustration. “Carl, you know it’s too dangerous to go out there right now.”

“The longer we wait the less chance she has.” Carl argued.

“Daryl, Abraham and Sasha should be back soon.” Rick explained calmly. “They’ll lead the walkers away just like they did with the other half.”

“But we don’t know when they’ll be back.” Carl countered in frustration.

“But we know they will be back.” Jason spoke up. “Besides, it’ll be dark soon.”

“If she’s smart, she’ll find somewhere to spend the night.” Michonne added. “Somewhere safe. Almost all the walkers are here so the towns will be safer than usual.”

“When the others get back that’s when we’ll go look.” Rick told his son. “Not a second before.”

Carl bit his lip in frustration but nodded in agreement. It was the only reasonable compromise that could be made.

“We should get something to eat and maybe try for an early night.” Jason suggested, rubbing the top of Carl’s hand. “We should be up early to look for Enid, okay?”

Carl found Jason’s smile to be infectious before nodding. A blind search in the darkness wouldn’t be very successful. A fresh, prepared morning search once the walkers were away would be much more effective as Enid wouldn’t be far away. It was the best they could do for now.

 

Once the sun had set and darkness of night had enveloped the community, Deanna started making her way back to the pantry with the goods that Spencer had stolen. At least this way no one would know the items had been stolen nor that Spencer had been the one to steal them in the first place. She wasn’t prepared to throw her son under the bus for an error of judgement such as that.

She stopped in the street as she tried to listen in on an argument coming from one of the houses. She couldn’t make out many of the words but it seemed to be an argument about the current state of the community. Before Deanna could listen to any more of it, a snarl snapped her out of her thoughts as a walker lunged towards her. She screamed and jumped back, dropping the case of items which the walker then tripped over. As it stood back up she grabbed the top half of the now broken bottle and prepared herself.

“Come on, you son of a bitch!” Deanna challenged the walker. She would fight, not run.

The walker walked up to her and tried to grab her but Deanna stopped it with one hand and started stabbing its chest with the broken bottle. She barked in effort as she repeatedly stabbed the walker in the torso, blood spurting out and covering her face, forcing her to close her eyes. Deanna didn’t stop stabbing it, she would keep going until it stopped moving. She would not lose to a corpse.

She put more force behind the stabs and on the tenth stab the walker fell onto its back. Deanna pinned it down and continued stabbing it in the stomach, chest and neck as it snarled up at her in an attempt to bite her. She kept on stabbing, feeling her arm burn from the exertion and wondering why it still hadn’t died. Suddenly, Rick rushed up to her and stabbed the walker in the head, instantly killing it and revealing to her what she had been doing wrong.

They both looked down at the corpse. The man had been tall with dirty blond hair and had a W scar on his forehead. He had been one of the attacking Wolves from earlier that day. Deanna panted as the adrenaline wore off and the physical exhaustion hit her.

“Carol says she got one of them but she couldn’t find the body.” Rick told her, looking over to a broken panel under one of the houses. “It must have been under there.”

Deanna thought back to a previous argument with Rick that had curiously enough taken place in the same spot they were now standing. It was just after the fight with Pete and Rick was pumped full of adrenaline, frustration and anger.

_“You still don’t get it. None of you do!” Rick shouted at them._

_He looked around at them all before turning back to Deanna, his expression fierce and the revolver still raised in his hand._

_“We know what needs to be done and we do it, we’re the ones who live. You!” Rick shouted, making them jump as he raised the gun again. “You just sit and plan and hesitate. You pretend like you know when you don’t!”_

_Rick glared at them angrily. In the silence of the moment they could all hear Sasha firing her silenced rifle at walkers that were banging on the walls. It acted as a reminder of the ever present threat that existed outside the walls and helped to hammer home Rick’s point even more._

_“We wish things weren’t what they are. But you wanna live? You want this place to stay standing?” Rick continued angrily, glaring at Deanna. “You’re way of doing things is done! Things don’t just get better because you _want_  them to!”_

“I wanna live. I want this place to stay standing.” Deanna told Rick, her voice hoarse from all the shouting.

“You need to lead them.” Rick told her, respecting her authority over the community.

Deanna let out an incredulous grunt of amusement. “They don’t need me, Rick. What they need is you.”

Rick stared back at her, unsure of how he should respond. He just shook his head. Deanna turned to the dropped case of items and started picking them up. Rick bent down to help her put everything back in the case so she could return it all to the pantry like she had originally intended.

“What I wanted for this place.” Deanna questioned him, remembering another old conversation. “Was that really just pie in the sky?”

Rick repeated the same answer he had given then though this time he was sincere. “No.”

Deanna nodded and stood up, picking up the crate with her before she walked off in the direction of the pantry. Rick watched her go, glad to see that she was starting to understand what they needed to do to survive in the world. 

 

Jason and Carl lay in bed together under the covers. As usual, they were spooning, enjoying the feeling of skin against skin as they lay in nothing but their boxers. Jason placed soft kisses on Carl’s neck, shoulder and ear as he rubbed the younger teen’s chest and tummy affectionately.

“No matter what happens, I want you to promise me something.” Jason whispered into Carl’s ear as he continued to place small kisses on it.

“What?” Carl rasped contently as he snuggled himself closer against Jason’s slightly larger body.

Jason grinned against Carl’s cheek as he leaned over to kiss it. “Never forget that I love you.”

Carl grinned at the affectionate confession and turned over to face Jason. “I love you too.”

Jason held his grin as he stared into Carl’s eyes, holding his gaze as he let himself get lost in the blue orbs.

“You’ve got the most gorgeous eyes of anyone I’ve ever known.” Jason told him before kissing him.

Carl closed his eyes and moaned softly into the kiss as he returned it, his tongue teasing Jason’s own for a few moments before they separated.

Jason settled back down behind Carl but held Carl’s hand in one of his own as they spooned. These were the moments in which they were happiest. Alone together, embraced, affectionate and able to be as open and as loving as they wished. No Wolves, no walkers, no threats or disturbances. Just the two of them.

Carl’s hand guided Jason’s to caress down his chest and navel before settling on the growing bulge in his boxers. The previous intimacy had been enough to excite Carl enough to want to do something about it. Jason groaned in Carl’s ear as he rubbed his lover’s hardness through the fabric, feeling his own member hardening against Carl’s backside. The younger teen let out a gentle moan and rubbed himself against Jason’s hardness as his older lover pushed his boxers down.

“What do you want?” Jason whispered huskily in Carl’s ear as he started stroking the solid shaft.

“You.” Carl answered just as huskily, one of his arms reaching into the nightstand drawer.

Jason licked Carl’s earlobe as he increased the pace of his strokes, stopping only to take the condom Carl had retrieved. He resumed his strokes as he kissed Carl’s neck, loving the sound of the younger’s moans and soft gasps. Carl reached back into the drawer for the small tub of lubricant and handed it over to Jason, his breathing deeper as his body responded to the pleasure.

Jason expertly spread the clear liquid onto the fingers of his free hand and bit down on Carl’s neck as he prepared his lover. Carl gasped out at the intrusion but quickly relaxed, his body still semi prepared from the last time they made love. After a few more moments of stroking and preparation, Carl groaned as he felt Jason’s throbbing length slip inside of him.

Jason waited for Carl to adjust to his size again before biting down on the younger teen’s neck as he started to move. It was the first time they had made love while spooning and they both loved it, evident from the sharp gasps from Carl and deep groans from Jason. They knew they had to be quiet but it wasn’t easy, especially when Jason found the special spot inside of Carl.

Carl’s moans grew slightly louder as Jason’s hand resumed its strokes on his shaft while he increased the pace of his thrusts. Both of them knew they couldn’t last as long as usual, there was something more intense and passionate about their love making that night. Jason’s thoughts were on the potential of some form of marriage while Carl’s were on how lucky he was to have met Jason.

Jason thrusted as hard and as fast as he could in that position while his hand matched the pace perfectly. He continued to kiss and bite Carl’s neck and shoulders, moaning loudly in the younger teen’s ear. He was giving himself fully to Carl. No one else would ever have the rights to his heart for as long as he lived. Carl was everything he needed.

Carl gasped out Jason’s name as he spilled into his hand and onto the sheets. As soon as he heard his lover climax, Jason couldn’t last any longer. With a final deep thrust he moaned Carl’s name as he came violently. Jason stayed inside him for a couple of minutes while they panted and got their breath back. Once he did pull out and clean up they quickly snuggled back into each other and let themselves fall asleep. They were content. They were in love. This was it for them.

 

Jessie stood in her garage, looking over some things and enjoying the quietness that the evening brought. The bangs against the walls could still be heard but from her side of the town the crickets were louder. She looked up when Rick stepped into the garage.

“Those bodies by the graveyard, the reason I wanted to wait was…Glenn. We don’t know if he’s still out there. And Daryl, Sasha, Abraham” Rick was hesitant, the worst case scenario becoming more likely in his mind. “I wanted them back by now. I wanted those things gone. I just wanted to wait.”

Jessie nodded in understanding. “You said it could go on a while.”

“I did.” Rick agreed. “And it could.”

“Rick, it already has. They could still be alive.” Jessie told him optimistically. “We’re not moving past that, it’s just, right here, in this moment, this is it. This is what it is.”

“This is what life looks like now.” Rick rasped in response.

“You heard about that?” Jessie questioning rhetorically.

Rick nodded, taking a step forward.

“I wasn’t saying there wasn’t a future.” Jessie explained. “There’s gotta be.”

Rick stared at her in silence. He had the desire to make a move, to finally do what he had been wanting to do since before he fought Pete. Jessie’s husband wasn’t a problem anymore and they had gotten closer over the last few days.

“Tell me there’s more.” Jessie asked of him.

Rick didn’t say anything. He took another couple tentative steps forward, caressed her cheek with his hand before leaning in and kissing her. Jessie was surprised at first but found pleasure shooting through her. She couldn’t remember the last time someone had kissed her as gently and as passionately as Rick was kissing her in that moment. She returned the kiss, allowing their tongues to duel as Rick pulled her closer to him while her hands roamed his muscular back.

They both needed this. This is what their future could be. This was what life could be. This was more.

 

Deanna walked up to the front gate. Through the thick chain-link fence that covered the main gate she could see the silhouettes of the walkers against the moonlight. She could hear them all growling and snarling on the other side of the wall, completely incapable of getting inside despite their numbers. Her husband had built an impressive wall.

She walked up to the fence and slammed her hand against it repeatedly. She listened to the excited snarls and groans from the hungry corpses but observed that nothing changed. The gate didn’t move nor did the walls. The herd, for all its numbers, was powerless against the wall her husband had constructed. Alexandria would survive this. They would rise again.

Deanna smirked at their victory over the undead outside and decided to turn in for the night. She headed back up the street along the perimeter towards her house. As she walked, she failed to spot some blood trickling through the wall where the truck hit that morning.

 

Jason sat up and yawned. He had been awoken by a rather unpleasant dream so he took a few moments to bathe in the moonlight streaming through the window. He liked how quiet it was at night, there was a peacefulness to it, even if there were thousands of walkers banging and snarling at the main gate.

He turned to his right and observed Carl’s sleeping form. The back of his neck was still a little red from Jason’s bites earlier, something he took pride in. Jason loved how peaceful Carl looked when he slept, face relaxed, messy hair covering the pillow. It was in these quiet moments that he truly appreciated how lucky he was to have the boy beside him. Jason would die before he let anything happen to Carl.

Jason reached over to the nightstand and flicked his diary open. He wrote down a few of his thoughts about Carl and how lucky he was before putting the pen down. He turned the pages until he found the two photos he treasured most. The black and white photo of him and Carl that Aaron took, and the colour photo of him and Kellin. Times had changed but his feelings hadn’t.

As much as he still missed Kellin, he felt oddly at peace with it. For the first time since his death, Jason could honestly say he was starting to get over it. Carl had become such a huge part of his life, truly being the only person keeping him going. He loved Carl just as much as he had loved Kellin and they now had a home together. There may be a herd at the doorstep but that would be dealt with. They could survive and be happy together.

Jason smiled and closed his diary before placing it back on his nightstand. He stroked Carl’s hair gently so that it was no longer falling in front of his eyes before sinking back down in the bed. Jason wrapped his arm around Carl and pulled him close, spooning him yet again before allowing himself to drift off back to sleep.

 

It was morning. The walls had held through the night and the herd was still banging against them. Apart from the ever present threat of the herd outside, the community was peaceful. It was a sunny morning with hardly a cloud in the sky. The birds were chirping away happily, ignorant to the danger outside the walls.

Rick walked along the perimeter of the community to check the structural integrity of all the walls. It was what Jason had suggested and had started doing the day before and it made perfect sense. The walls looked secure but there was no way of knowing just how much force and weight they could take against them, though he did trust Reg’s architectural knowledge and skills.

Rick looked away from the wall to his right and spotted Morgan practicing with his staff. It was a morning ritual for the man so that he didn’t lose his impressive skills with the weapon. Something Rick was less impressed with was Morgan’s policy of not killing even the worst kinds of people. It was a flawed philosophy that was going to get people killed and had almost got Rick himself killed.

“Morgan.” Rick called as he walked past.

“Morning.” Morgan greeted with a smile.

“We haven’t talked, we should. A little later, okay?” Rick suggested.

Morgan wore the expression of a guilty school pupil before smiling and nodding. “Okay.”

Rick nodded and continued on past him. Once he reached the section where the truck had hit which they had added support to on the inside, he noticed something slightly alarming. Blood was trickling through one of the small holes in the steel panel. Rick touched it with his finger, noting its cold and slightly drier texture. It was walker blood. They needed to do something about the herd.

He climbed the ladder up onto the main gate’s viewing platform where Maggie stood. He assumed she had probably been there all night, constantly on the watch for any signs that Glenn was alive. Rick understood the emotional torment she was going through but knew how unhealthy it was for her to be in such a state for too long.

“You don’t have to be up here so much.” Rick told her.

“I won’t be. This is the direction he’d come in. If he sends up a signal it’ll be from out there.” Maggie replied before hesitating. “Or it won’t be.”

Rick understood her doubts. “When we go out there it’s never easy, it’s never simple, it’s always a fight. We’ve come back from harder things, from further away. Glenn, Abraham, Daryl and Sasha, they will too.”

Maggie appreciated his optimism but it did nothing to dispel the doubts that plagued her mind and kept her up at night.

“Maybe we don’t wait for them to be back. We should start figuring out how to draw the walkers away.” Rick suggested. “We have some food and water to last us a while and the walls are holding. We can take our time, really think this through. Do it right. Clear it so they can walk right in.”

Maggie smiled back. “I saw Judith in the house the other day. She’s starting to look like Lori.”

Rick nodded slightly but hesitated. It was something he too had noticed about the joyful little bundle that was his baby daughter. However, the constant reminder of his dead wife, who had died because of a wrong judgement he had made, always weighed on his conscience.

“Yeah.” Rick replied, agreeing with the observation.

“Made me happy.” Maggie finished.

“Yeah, me too.” Rick replied lowly as he thought about Lori.

 

Gabriel taped a piece of paper to one side of the gazeebo before doing the same on the other side. It was a notice to let people know that he’d be conducting a prayer circle next to the solar panels at one in the afternoon. As he started to walk away, Rick came by followed by Carl, Jason and Ron. Rick immediately tore off the first sheet of paper as they passed through the gazeebo before tearing off the other sheet as well.

“Dad…” Carl complained but knew better than to push it. Rick still had a problem with Gabriel.

Jason nudged Carl with his elbow and pointed behind them with his thumb. When Carl turned to look he noticed Gabriel placing two new sheets on the gazeebo to replace the ones Rick took down. The priest was stubborn. Carl couldn’t help but smile.

The four of them eventually reached one of the work tables that Rick had previously used to build up the reinforcements for the wall. He set down a Beretta 92FS and a Glock 19 on the table while Jason set down his AKMSU on the table as well. Rick spotted Ron eyeing Jason’s assault rifle and decided to dispel any fantastical ideas.

“Handguns will be a little better for your first go.” Rick explained, pointing out the different components. “Magazine release, slide release, thumb safety.”

“That stuff’s easy, right, dad?” Carl commented with a smirk, earning a look from Ron.

“Yeah.” Rick answered as he slotted in an empty magazine and pulled back the slide. “Empty magazine, empty chamber, see it?”

“Yep.” Ron replied as he titled his head to get a better look.

Rick turned to face the wall for added security, despite the gun being empty.

“Now, if someone’s in front of you and they have a gun…” Rick began.

“You’re gonna be scared.” Carl commented, still smirking under his hat. “You will be.”

Jason knew that this was Carl being angry over Ron’s refusal to help but he didn’t find it helpful to the lesson.

“Your body’s gonna tense, you won’t have time to think, you’re just gonna want to pull the trigger as soon as you get it in front of you.” Rick explained, performing the same tense, rookie motion of aiming the gun at stomach level and pulling the trigger. “But you’ll miss and you’ll be dead.”

“You need to be able to calmly focus. Block everything else out.” Jason added to the explanation. “If you’re calm then your aim will be better. Especially against a moving target.”

Rick pulled back the slide so the gun was ready to fire again.

“You have to get it up to your eye.” Rick told him and demonstrated the movement.

“This way you’ll know what you’re aiming at.” Jason added. “The sightline should always be at eye level.”

“You have to be strong enough to wait for your moment.” Carl also added. He enjoyed flaunting his superiority to Ron.

“Can I…?” Ron asked, gesturing to the gun.

Rick handed him the gun and Ron took aim with outstretched, straight arms. Jason walked around the table and pushed his hands back a little, forcing his elbows to bend.

“Your elbows should always be a little bent, the same way they are when you point or gesture at something.” Jason explains. “Helps with recoil and movement.”

Ron nodded and made sure his elbows remained a little bent as he looked down the sightline with his finger on the trigger.

“Hey.” Rick caught his attention, grabbing his finger and pulling it off the trigger. “Your finger doesn’t touch the trigger until you’re ready to shoot.”

Ron held the gun up at eye level, closing one eye to assist his aim as he made sure to keep his elbows bent and his finger off the trigger. Once he felt comfortable with this stance, he finally pulled the trigger. The gun let out the familiar click of an empty chamber.

“Keep that one with you.” Rick told him. “Get a feel of what it’s like to carry one around.”

“Glocks are a good start too.” Jason added. “They’re lighter than some other models, like Rick’s python.”

“Can I shoot it?” Ron asked optimistically. “I mean, like, down at the walkers.”

 “Not with things how they are.” Rick replied after a couple of seconds. “The walls are strong but we’re lucky the walkers are all spread out. We don’t want to pull them all in one spot.”

“Well, what about target practice in the centre of town?” Ron suggested. “Cause then the sound will spread out in each direction or we could use silencers or something like that?”

“It’s better if we don’t have bullets flying around the centre of town.” Jason commented. “Last thing we need is for you to miss and for someone to catch a stray bullet.”

“Yeah, I guess. And I mean, we probably don’t wanna waste the bullets right now, huh?” Ron replied after a moment of thought. “I just wanna learn more.”

“You will.” Carl commented, earning him another annoyed glare from Ron.

Ron’s glare softened when he realised that Jason was glaring back at him far more aggressively. Jason missed nothing and he would fiercely defend Carl, even from something as simple as a glare.

As Ron walked away, firmly intimidated by Jason’s glare, the older teen picked up his AKMSU and made sure the strap was around his shoulder so the gun could hang at his side. He had opted to carry it with him at all times since the Wolves’ attack and with the pending threat of the herd outside the walls.

“Jason.” Rick called.

“Yeah?” Jason answered, turning to face the man with Carl by his side.

“You helped protect this place yesterday.” Rick explained. “So, I want you at the meeting with Morgan.”

“With Morgan?” Jason questioned, furrowing his brow. “This about his no killing thing?”

Rick nodded slowly. “Yeah.”

Jason nodded. “I’ll be there.”

 

Morgan walked up onto the porch of the infirmary and headed towards the door. When he reached it, he hesitated. What he had planned was risky and he wasn’t completely sure he wanted to involve Denise in it. Rick and the others wouldn’t approve of it. He turned to leave when the door opened.

“Hey, sorry.” Denise greeted him, stirring something in a glass. “I was making…you want some oatmeal?”

“Thank you.” Morgan replied. “I’m okay.”

“You were coming to the door, what’s up?” Denise questioned. “Want me to take a look at your arm?”

“No, I’m not here for…” Morgan hesitated before regaining his composure. “I’m fine.”

“You can tell me if you’re not.” Denise offered.

Morgan nodded. He did trust her.

“Morgan.” Rick’s voice from the street made him turn around. “Can we talk now?”

Morgan nodded in agreement.

 

Morgan felt uncomfortable as everyone sat at the table looked at him. They were in the second house that Rick’s group had been given, allowing the discussion to be more private. Carol sat to his right, glaring at him while Rick and Michonne were directly in front. Jason sat to his left with his hands clasped together on the table, waiting for things to begin.

“What’s going on?” Morgan asked them, the silence becoming too uncomfortable.

“When I was coming back I tried to cut off the herd with the RV, lead the walkers away.” Rick began. “But five of those people with the Ws in their foreheads, they stopped me, they tried to kill me, shot up the RV.”

Morgan stared back, his expression turning grimmer as he realised where the conversation was going. They were the same five Wolves he let out of the community. Rick was glaring at him.

“Now, Carol and Jason say they saw you.” Rick continued. “That you wouldn’t kill those people.”

“Did you let any of them go?” Carol questioned.

“Yes I did.” Morgan answered honestly.

Jason scowled at Morgan. His decision to let those psychopaths live almost got Rick killed and had Rick not killed them it could have allowed for a second attack. He didn’t understand how Morgan could be so stupid and naïve.

“I didn’t want to kill five people I didn’t have to kill.” Morgan defended himself.

“They burned people alive!” Carol spat at him angrily.

“They killed kids, Morgan.” Jason added. “Children.”

“Yeah.” Morgan replied, guilt lacing his tone. “Why didn’t you kill me, Rick? Back in King County? I pulled a knife on you, I stabbed you, so why didn’t you kill me? Is it because I saved you after the hospital?”

“Because I knew who you were.” Rick responded simply. It wasn’t debatable in his mind.

“Back then I would have killed you soon as look at you and I tried. But you, you let me live.” Morgan retorted seriously. “And then I was there to help Aaron and Daryl. Because if I wasn’t there, if they died, maybe those Wolves wouldn’t have been able to come back here.”

Rick thought about it. It was partially true but he also believed Jason had been right down at the gate. It would have happened regardless, it was just a matter of time.

“I don’t know what’s right anymore.” Morgan continued with a shaky voice. “Cause I did wanna kill those men, I seen what they did what they would keep doing. I knew I could end it.”

“Then you should have.” Jason interrupted quickly.

“But I also know that people can change.” Morgan responded, shaking his head. “Cause everyone sitting here has.”

“You say that like those men were misguided. They weren’t. They were monsters.” Jason argued. “Just like the men that tried to rape me, or those people back at Terminus that tried to eat us. Monsters like that should be put down.”

“All life is precious and that idea, that idea changed me, it brought me back and it keeps me living.” Morgan countered desperately.

“I just don’t think it can be that easy.” Michonne commented.

“It’s not easy.” Morgan retorted quickly. The hardest thing was not killing them.

“I wasn’t saying…” Michonne began but Morgan interrupted.

“I know.” Morgan sighed. “And I’ve thought about letting that idea go but I don’t want to.”

“You may have to.” Michonne countered. “Things aren’t as simple as four words. I don’t think they ever were.”

“Do you think I don’t belong here?” Morgan challenged them.

“Making it now, do you really think you can do that without getting blood on your hands?” Rick challenged him in response.

“I don’t know.” Morgan answered honestly.

“We’re not saying you have to kill everyone all the time.” Jason began, trying to appeal to Morgan without being aggressive. “We’re only talking about killing when it is the right thing to do.”

“How do you know it’s the right thing?” Morgan challenged him.

“By judging character. The group, before, didn’t want to kill those people at Terminus but Rick did.” Jason explained. “You know what happened not two days later? They found us and tried to kill us again. So, we ended up killing them anyway.”

Morgan stared back at Jason, knowing that the Wolves fell into the category of being too far gone to do anything with. They wouldn’t change because that’s what they were.

“I heard from Carl, and forgive me for bringing up old wounds, that something similar happened at the prison.” Jason stated carefully, looking at Michonne, Rick and Carol. “With the Governor. He came back, right?”

Michonne closed her eyes at the memory of Hershel and nodded. “Yeah, he did.”

“Not everyone has to be killed.” Jason continued. “But the monsters? The psychopaths? The only sensible way to deal with them is to end them.”

“I don’t know if I can.” Morgan replied honestly.

“You’re a good man, Morgan. Maybe too good.” Jason concluded, standing up. “So look at it this way, what would you rather have on your conscience? The life of one psycho or the lives lost because you couldn’t do what was necessary?”

Morgan fell silent as he thought about that. It was the crux of the argument, they all knew killing wasn’t what any of them probably wanted to do. It was, unfortunately, the smartest thing to do in the post-apocalyptic world.

 

Rick and Michonne stood together on the porch of the house they had the meeting in. No real conclusions had been made during it but at least the air was clearer. They all knew where the stood on the issue of killing people who were a threat to their community. It was time to focus on the threat the walkers posed.

“If we can somehow get outside the walls, get back to our cars at the quarry.” Rick suggested. “We can use them to draw them away.”

“We could set up more watch points, coordinate the fire of guns and flares so we can pull them out in even directions.” Michonne added to the plan.

“We’d need to get all our people on it.” Rick nodded in agreement. “Carl, Jason, Tara, Rosita, Carol.”

“What about everybody else?” Michonne asked, surprised at their exclusion when the likes of Heath and Aaron were capable.

“Well, let’s just keep this to our own for now.” Rick told her as he stood up straight.

“Really?” Michonne questioned incredulously.

“If we had the time to bring the people along, then sure.” Rick argued. “But we haven’t had a chance to catch our breath.”

“Really?” Michonne repeated just as incredulously. “We’re in here together. We’re catching our breath right now. Anything else is just excuses.”

Rick didn’t reply but he nodded after thinking for a few moments. Michonne was right, he was just inventing excuses to exclude the Alexandrians from any plans because he didn’t have the patience to teach them how to survive. At the meeting over his potential exile he had promised to show them how to survive. It was time to live up to that promise.

They were interrupted by Deanna who power walked up to the porch, a spring of optimism in her step despite the grim situation they found themselves in.

“Deanna.” Rick greeted.

“Rick.” Deanna replied as she walked up to them with a rolled up sheet of paper in her hands.

“What’s that?” Rick asked her, curious about the A3 sheet.

“Plans for the expansion.” Deanna explained with a grin.

Rick turned away. “We’ve got a few other things on our plate right now.”

“I know.” Deanna answered, handing Michonne the plans. “These are for what Alexandria can be after this because one way or another there’s going to be an after this.”

Deanna smiled at them both before leaving the plans with them and walking away.

 

Jason and Carl found Gabriel setting things up near the solar panels. He had already laid out a rug on the grass and had his bible ready as well. The two teens walked up to him with Carl carrying a machete identical to the one that was sheathed on Jason’s belt.

“Gabriel.” Jason announced as they reached him. “You wanted to learn.”

“Ah, yes.” Gabriel replied, slightly hesitant. “Is here okay?”

Jason nodded. “Yeah, we’ve got plenty of space here.”

“Like I said, we’ll start with the machete.” Carl told him, handing over the bladed weapon to the priest.

Gabriel held the machete loosely by the handle, lacking confidence with the handling of such a weapon. He wanted to learn but he had no prior experience either so he lacked the confidence.

“You need to hold it in a tight grip.” Carl advised but Gabriel was still unsure.

Jason thought for a moment. “Did you ever do any sport before all this?”

Gabriel looked at him with confusion. “Yes, I sometimes played badminton.”

“Okay, hold it like a badminton racket.” Jason instructed as Gabriel changed his grip. “But instead of swinging side on, you’ll be wanting to swing vertically.”

Once Gabriel changed his grip and had a better hold and command of the weapon, the lesson could begin. Jason took out his own machete and demonstrated three different ways to swing the machete depending on the target and situation. Gabriel did his best to copy them and was succeeding for the most part with only a couple inexperienced errors.

“With the walkers it has to be the head, nowhere else.” Carl advised him, though the priest already knew that much.

“In desperate moments you can decapitate them.” Jason explained, demonstrating a horizontal swing. “But remember the head can still bite when it’s on the ground.”

Gabriel nodded, having seen this a couple of times before he met the group. Back then, the sight of a decapitated head trying to bite him had made him throw up on the spot.

“Once you get the blade into the skull, don’t pull back.” Carl told him. “It’ll get stuck.”

“Stuck?” Gabriel questioned. He wouldn’t have expected it.

“Yeah, it’s a lot harder to get a blade out of bone than it is to cut into it.” Jason explained.

“So you swing through and slide the blade down and out of the wound.” Carl finished while Jason demonstrated the correct motion.

Gabriel attempted the motion but wasn’t confident he was doing it correctly. Jason walked up beside him and held his hand and arm. The teen guided the priest’s arm slowly through each stage of the movement, especially the removal of the blade. He repeated this action a few times, getting faster each time until Gabriel was doing it on his own.

“Very good.” Carl commented. “You’re a quick learner.”

Jason smiled and nodded in agreement. Gabriel showed great potential and could become very skilled in combat with a few more lessons and some more experience. The more people they had in the community who could fight the better. Gabriel, as a priest, had an obligation to protect his congregation so if he could become as dangerous as anyone else in the group then his flock would be safe.

Jason could swear he heard odd creaking sounds coming from the guard tower. It was probably nothing serious, just some broken panels from where the truck crashed. He was going to ask Carl and Gabriel if they heard it but decided just to focus more on the lesson. He would check out the tower later.

 

By the wall panel that needed to be reinforced, Rick set up a make-shift work table and got to work cutting up wood. They needed a firm structure to help support the wall should too much weight be pressed against it after the truck slammed into it. It was hard work and it was time consuming on his own but he didn’t care. As he struggled to place one of the wooden beams, Tobin came up behind him and helped him to steady it. Rick looked at him curiously.

“You looked like you could use some help.” Tobin told him gruffly.

The two men got to work placing the beam and screwing it into place. It was much easier with two people working on it instead of just the one.

“You know, I think we could build up a brace on this thing.” Tobin pondered out loud, his previous work as head of the construction crew serving as experience.

It took them under ten minutes to cut an angle into the top of a pair of wooden beams so they could be set against the wall at a forty five degree angle. It worked well and once secured would offer much more reinforcement than the simple additions Rick had originally been making. As they set the second beam into place, Tobin noticed the blood that had trickled through one of the gaps.

“Don’t mean anything, as long as we keep this up.” Rick told him as he set a nail into place.

“You know, you scared the hell outta people when we first saw you.” Tobin told him with a nervous laugh.

“I know.” Rick replied as he started hammering.

“You scared the hell outta me with that beard, the way you looked around like you were seeing things we weren’t.” Tobin continued. “Hiding around the corners. Turns out you were.”

Rick continued hammering. It was true, his whole group had seen the flaws in the community from the moment they set foot inside the walls.

“Things moved slow here and then things just started moving fast.” Tobin continued. “Too fast. But don’t give up on us.”

Rick could tell he was sincere and there may have been some truth to his words but Rick would believe it when he saw it. For now, they were still the same scared and unprepared people to him.

 

As Olivia sat on the stairs of the armoury and read a book, she heard something fall over in the pantry. She closed her book with a sigh and headed through to discover the contents of one of the shelves had fallen to the floor somehow.

“Crap!” She muttered and set her book down.

As she bent down onto the floor to start picking the items up, she failed to notice Ron slip into the corridor towards the armoury. He quickly rushed inside and searched the counter for the ammunition boxes. He found a box with the same numbers that were on the side of the gun Rick had given him, 9x19mm. Ron quickly grabbed a handful of bullets and slipped back out before anyone found him.

 

After Gabriel had received his lessons and had started the prayer meeting, Jason and Carl had opted to head home. They had left the machete with Gabriel so he could always carry it or at least store it in his church for the times he might need it. They could hear the constant banging of the walker herd against the walls, which gave Jason an idea. As they approached the guard tower where Rick and Tobin were working on the reinforcement, Jason steered them towards the men.

“Hey, Rick.” Jason called as they approached. “Have you got a minute?”

“Yeah.” Rick replied, stopping what he was doing.

“I was thinking, the others aren’t back yet so we should probably start preparing in case they don’t come back at all.” Jason suggested. “I have every faith in them but I don’t want us to be unprepared.”

Rick stared with narrow eyes, waiting for Jason to finish proposing whatever he had been thinking about.

“We need to get that herd away from here but the cars are back at the quarry.” Jason continued. “So, I was thinking of using the walkers at the gate. The bars allow us to cut them open without them harming us.”

Rick tilted his head a little, he had a feeling he knew where Jason was going with this. Carl did too and neither of them liked it.

“I could use their guts as camouflage, drop down on the other side of the wall and simply walk through them.” Jason proposed. “I run along to the quarry or at the very least, the roadblock we put into place, come back and lead them away.”

“No, you’re not going out there.” Carl quickly argued.

“Even if I went looking for Enid?” Jason questioned with a raised eyebrow.

Carl shook his head firmly. He cared more about Jason than he did about Enid and he wasn’t going to let his boyfriend do something so reckless.

“No.” Rick stated bluntly.

“Why not, Rick?” Jason asked, glaring back at the man. “The walkers won’t notice me with the camouflage.”

“They might notice you as you drop down.” Rick countered. “Or you could hurt your ankle when you land.”

“I think we both know I’m too careful for that, Rick.” Jason retorted with a sigh.

“You would be on your own out there.” Rick argued. “You could come across a group. You’d be at their mercy.”

Jason sighed and rubbed his eyes with his thumb and forefinger in frustration.

“It’s too dangerous.” Rick concluded. “We’ll find another way. A safer way.”

“No matter what way you slice it, there’s always gonna be a risk.” Jason replied with a shrug.

“But you shouldn’t take that risk all on your own.” Carl hissed, scowling at Jason for being so willing to sacrifice himself.

Jason was about to speak when they all heard a loud metallic screech coming from further up the street. The four of them turned towards the church to find Spencer hanging on a wire, using it to slowly climb his way from the wall to the church roof. If he fell he would land right on top of the herd.

“What the hell?” Tobin muttered.

Rick took off running towards Spencer with the other three close behind him. He climbed the ladder in record time and made his way onto the watch point as Spencer continued to move himself along the wire, his weight increased by the bag of guns on his back.

“Spencer! Hey! Spencer!” Rick shouted. “Get back here!”

On one of the nearby watch points, Eugene turned his head at the sound of Rick shouting. He quickly noticed the situation with Spencer.

“Tara.” Eugene got his friend’s attention.

Tara couldn’t believe what she was seeing as Spencer continued to make his way across.

“Spencer.” Tara gasped, a sickening feeling in her stomach telling her this wasn’t going to end well.

“Spencer, get back here now!” Rick demanded of him, noticing the hook on the church roof starting to move.

Jason quickly ascended the ladder so he could see what was happening better. They could all hear the metallic groans of the hook pulling on the church roof. It wasn’t going to hold.

“Spencer!” Tara shouted, watching the hook destabilise. “Spencer, move!”

The further along Spencer got the louder the groaning became. He was putting far too much weight on the hook. He looked down at all the hungry corpses that were reaching up at him. The hook let out a sudden, loud groan as the wire bounced from the vibration. Spencer was taken by surprise and felt his legs drop from the wire, leaving him dangling by his arms above a sea of rotting cannibals.

“Go! Get moving!” Rick bellowed desperately. “Hurry!”

“Eugene, have Maggie and Rosita fire their guns up from their posts.” Tara told him.

“Why?” Eugene asked as Tara unholstered her gun.

“Just do it!” Tara barked back as she climbed over the wall, holding on by one hand while her legs rested on the support beam.

“Tara, I cannot in good conscience…” Eugene began nervously.

“Just do it!” Tara bellowed back.

Spencer started moving like Rick told him to, shimming along the wire as fast as he could. However, he continued in the direction of the church and after moving a few more inches the weight was too much. With a loud snap the wire detached from the hook and sent Spencer crashing down against the perimeter wall, landing on his back on the grass. The walkers quickly closing in.

“Spencer!” Rick called, grabbing the wire. “Come on!”

Jason cursed as he watched Spencer scramble to his feet. As Tara started firing at the walkers, trying to buy him some time, Jason took aim with his AKMSU and started to do the same. He used the fore grip to steady his aim and make sure every bullet fired was a headshot on the walkers below as they moved towards Spencer.

Spencer shoved some walkers away from him so that Tara and Jason could shoot them from their positions. He grabbed onto the wire and started climbing the wall while Rick tried his best to pull him up. Tobin ascended the ladder and helped Rick with the wire as some of the walkers had managed to grab onto Spencer’s feet. The young man tried his best to kick them away while Jason and Tara tried their best to shoot the walkers off him.

As soon as one of Spencer’s shoes came off the resistance loosened and Rick and Tobin were able to pull him up faster. Tara and Jason continued to shoot at the walkers below in case he fell again but were glad he was out of harm’s way. Rick and Tobin were starting to lose their strength as their stamina faded and the same was true for Spencer. Tara could also feel herself slipping down the support beam as she holstered her empty gun.

“Grab on!” Michonne called to her, helping the younger woman back onto the platform.

Morgan was next to climb the ladder and assist Rick and Tobin with pulling Spencer up. With his help they managed to raise him another couple feet so he could scramble his way back onto the platform as Jason finally stopped shooting at the walkers. He flicked the safety switch and quickly checked Spencer for bites.

“Tara! You almost died once for these people!” Rick roared over at the young woman.

“What?!” Tara questioned in disbelief.

“What the hell were you doing?!” Rick roared back angrily.

Tara simply raised her middle finger at him. She wouldn’t tolerate him being angry at her for helping someone. Jason was also taken aback by Rick’s anger but knew better than to comment on it in that moment.

“I lost a damn shoe.” Spencer gasped out. “Crap.”

“What was that?” Rick questioned angrily.

“I was trying to help.” Spencer explained. “I wanted to get to a car, draw them away.”

“You ever make a climb like that before?” Rick asked him, bending down as he tried to get his breath back.

Spencer was silent. That was his first time doing something like that.

“You wanna help? Don’t make us come running to save you!” Rick scolded him. “You got an idea, you come to me!”

“Would you have listened to me?” Spencer retorted cynically.

Rick glared down at him. He had thought Jason’s proposed plan had been reckless and ill thought out but at least he voiced it. He had the sense to come to Rick and ask him about the plan instead of just doing it. Spencer had a lot to learn.

 

Carol stood on the porch of the main house, holding Judith in her arms as she watched Morgan enter the infirmary. She stood watch and a couple minutes later he emerged again, heading up the street alone. Carol was about to head back inside when she noticed Denise leave the infirmary with a satchel bag and walk up the street in the same direction as Morgan. Something was going on.

Carol quietly followed them up the street until they reached the corner. She stopped at the corner and watched them as they headed further down towards the holding cell. It was the same room Rick had been kept in after his fight with Pete. Carol knew Morgan had let five of the Wolves leave the community but now she wondered if he had kept one of them in the community with them. It would be treachery if he had.

Carol rushed back down the street to Jessie’s house and knocked on the door. It only took a couple of seconds for the blonde haired stylist to answer it.

“Hi.” Carol greeted her unassumingly.

“Hey.” Jessie greeted, smiling.

“I know you just took care of Judith this morning but they need some help at the watch points after that thing with Spencer.” Carol explained, inventing a lie on the spot. “So, can you take her?”

“Yeah, no problem.” Jessie replied enthusiastically. “Unless you want me to take your shift?”

“No, I like being out there.” Carol replied fairly honestly.

“Even with all them outside?” Jessie questioned, referring to the walkers.

“I can see everything, even inside.” Carol answered.

“Let me just lock these up, just give me a second.” Jessie replied, stepping inside. “Wanna come in?”

Carol nodded and stepped inside the house while Jessie went to the back to lock up.

“Carol?” Sam’s voice sounded from upstairs. “Carol?”

“What, Sam?” Carol responded, starting to lose her patience. “Sam?”

“What happens if you can’t live with it?” Sam asked, referring to their previous conversation about his father.

“I told you, it eats you up.” Carol answered, repeating what she had said before. “Can you come down here? I can barely hear you.”

“The people who came, were they the monsters?” Sam asked, clearly confused. “Did my Dad turn into one?”

“What?” Carol questioned, a little confused herself.

“If you kill people, do you turn into one of the monsters?” Sam asked more clearly.

“The only thing that keeps you from becoming a monster is killing.” Carol replied, though she knew it was a little cryptic for the boy.

After a few moments, Jessie returned and took Judith from her with a smile.

“Thank you for this.” Carol said sincerely.

“Oh yeah, no problem.” Jessie responded, always happy to take care of Judith.

Carol was liberated and quickly left the house. She had to confront Morgan.

 

Jason sighed as he slotted the bullets into the extended magazine. He hadn’t wanted to come back to the armoury but Spencer’s ridiculous attempt to lead the herd away had forced him to waste bullets and cause the herd to group up. At least his idea was far more sensible, even if Rick had completely disagreed with the sheer notion of it.

“Do you still want to die?” Carl asked Jason spontaneously. “Is that what the plan was all about?”

Jason sighed again and loaded the magazine into the AKMSU. “No, that’s not what it was about.”

“Then what?” Carl pressed, looking for an explanation.

Jason walked up to him so they were face to face. “I don’t want you to die. That’s what it’s about.”

Carl felt his bottom lip quiver under Jason’s sincere gaze. “But I don’t want you to die either.”

Jason wrapped his arms around Carl and pulled the smaller boy close against him. Carl immediately reciprocated the embrace, his arms wrapped tightly around the leather jacket. Jason held the embrace for several long moments.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered in Carl’s ear before continuing the hug.

 

Carol tried to open the cell door but she couldn’t remember which key worked. She kept trying the various keys she had, knowing she would find the right one through process of elimination. The next one she placed into the lock turned and opened the door. Morgan was standing behind it, glaring at her.

“Who the hell do you have in that cell?” Carol growled.

 

Jason and Carl walked down the street together. It would be evening soon so they were heading home to get something to eat. The others still weren’t back but at least the walls were still holding. Jason was excited for the next day. He was going to do something special for Carl. He deserved it. They both did.

What neither of the boys noticed was that Ron was following close behind them. His expression was stoic as he glared at the two teens. Ron pulled out his now loaded Glock and held it firmly in his hand. He would have to shoot Jason first since he had the assault rifle strapped to his side. Ron had it planned. He’d shoot Jason in the back a couple times and then shoot Carl in the chest. When Rick came running and found his son bleeding out, he’d shoot the man who killed his father in the head. Then it would be even. Ron’s grip on the gun tightened.

 

Rick continued to hammer away at the reinforcements with Tobin. They were almost done for the day and both men were getting tired from the constant work. Having to save Spencer earlier certainly hadn’t helped.

“Hey, have you seen Denise?” Tara asked, stopping by to check.

“No.” Rick answered, returning to his hammering.

As Tara walked away he had a second thought and stopped for a moment before going after her.

“Hey! Look, I’m sorry about before.” Rick called. “I was just…”

“It was stupid, that we know.” Tara replied.

“I just mean, what you did for him, you didn’t have to.” Rick told her.

“I know.” Tara answered simply.

“You could have died.” Rick stated, confused.

“I mean, I’d like to say I was thinking about it but I wasn’t.” Tara replied with a smirk.

“Is that why you did it?” Rick questioned. “You weren’t thinking about it?”

“No.” Tara replied, confused for a moment. “That’s how it works with us. We’re stuck with each other, right?”

“Rick.” Deanna called, walking up to them. “You saved my son. Thank you.”

“Thank Tara.” Rick dismissed her.

“I already did.” Deanna replied with a smile. “Now I’m thanking you.”

“What Spencer did was stupid.” Rick told her, visibly annoyed.

“I can’t argue that.” Deanna replied. “At least he tried.”

“That’s not the point.” Rick retorted with a frustrated sigh. “I could have tried. There was a chance.”

“How’s that?” Deanna asked, surprised by the revelation.

“When the walkers were going for him it made a gap.” Rick explained. “I could have jumped down, ran, made it out, I could have gotten a car, used it to lead the walkers away. I could have done that and Spencer would be dead.”

“But you didn’t do that.” Deanna challenged. “Why?”

Rick thought for a moment. “Well, I helped save him because he’s your son.”

“Wrong answer.” Deanna retorted with a knowing smirk.

Before Rick could question her on what the right answer was, his attention was stolen by something that the rest of the community had started to notice. Rising from a distant tree line, carried towards the community by the wind, was a collection of several green balloons. Rick recognised them as the balloons they used to mark the regroup point of the herding plan. Maggie quickly came running down the street behind them excitedly, hardly taking her eyes off the balloons as they floated past.

“That’s Glenn!” Maggie cried ecstatically. “That’s Glenn!”

Rick nodded in agreement. It was the perfect signal for him to send up because they all understood it. Glenn was alive and he wasn’t far away either. Their celebrations were interrupted by a sudden loud crack of wood snapping followed by the crash of wooden planks hitting the ground. There was a sickeningly loud groan as wood splintered and the guard tower began to tip over sending everyone dashing for cover.

 

**So the chapter is finally done. I’m terribly sorry for the long wait but I have been super busy with work, life in general, and my YouTube channel as well. I recently edited over 300 videos, so yeah.**

**Anyways, chapter 28 is fully planned out and will be up much sooner, especially after the amazing episode that was 6x09. Jason will be getting a lot of focus in the next chapter as the events will influence him a great deal. I can’t wait to write it :P**

**I hope this chapter was decent enough to earn your collective forgiveness. I’ll be more active from now on, I promise.**

**As usual, leave a comment/review to let me know what you liked/didn’t like and leave your predictions for where things are going for Jason!**

**Thanks for all the kudos/favourites/votes/bookmarks etc.**

**Thanks to the reviewers of chapter 26: RainbowO, Natalie73, jar98, kingcarlgrimes, Sarah_94, ThoUgHT_PurGes, leylinjan, uruark, Hunter, xayylaax, dar, hideyoshinagachika, zackhaev13, Dark.SKY27 and The Sorrowful Deity.**


	28. Over The Edge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The massive herd breaks into Alexandria and overruns the town. Jason promises to protect Carl only to discover that it's a promise he can't keep.

 

The loud snaps and cracks of wood splintering was constant as the guard tower continued to tip towards the interior of the community. Realising what was about to happen, Jason grabbed Carl by the shoulders and threw him to the ground, diving down next to him and covering him with his jacket as best he could. The creaks and groans got louder as the foundations of the wooden tower fragmented. The tower fell into the community, slamming down on the metal wall with a thud that echoed for miles followed by a crash that shook the ground beneath them.

Pieces of debris flew through the air from the impact of the tower crashing into the ground and smashing to bits on top of the flattened wall. A thick cloud of dust erupted from the wreckage and spread into the community, momentarily blocking out the sun and attacking their throats and lungs. Jason coughed deeply as his chest burned from the dust he had unintentionally inhaled, the corner of his right eyebrow throbbed but he ignored the pain as he stood up.

Jason pulled Carl back up to his feet. “Are you alright?”

Carl coughed a couple times as he nodded. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

Jason relaxed, grateful that Carl was unharmed. He took a moment to relax, knowing that had they been any closer they could have been killed as it came down.

“Jason, your eyebrow…” Carl pointed out in concern as the dust began to clear.

Jason brought his hand up to his right eyebrow and touched it, spotting fresh blood on the back of his fingerless glove. One of the pieces of splintered debris must have caught him. It throbbed painfully but didn’t seem too deep a cut.

“I’m fine.” Jason replied. “It’s just a flesh wound.”

He smiled to the younger teen until reality dawned on him. The tower hadn’t been the only danger and for a moment he had completely forgotten about that fact. Jason felt a cold shiver run down his spine when he heard the drumming of slow, uneven footsteps trampling over the metal plates. He looked over at the shattered wall in horror as he watched the herd stumble through the dust cloud. The metallic clangs of the footsteps got louder and more frequent as more and more walkers poured in, rasping and snarling hungrily with bits of wood sticking out of some of them.

Rick looked up in horror as he watched the herd enter Alexandria and start making its way towards him. He quickly scrambled to his feet and ran a few metres away from them to gain some distance. The walkers were slow and easy to kill but there were far too many of them to fight and survive. They had to retreat.

“Everyone! Get back! Get into your houses!” Rick bellowed as he pulled out his Colt Python. “Go!”

Rick shot the closest walker to him, hoping he could distract the herd long enough for everyone to get away. The only way they were going to survive the invasion was by running and hiding. A herd of this size was unstoppable.

Jason unsheathed his machete and Carl unsheathed his knife. They ran towards the solar panels where the herd was flooding in with Ron hot on their heels. They had to get to Gabriel and help him and his congregation get to safety. The prayer group was already running but to their surprise Gabriel was staying at the back with his machete and had already killed a couple of the walkers. One walker was about to grab him but Jason shoulder barged it to the floor before slicing into the head of the one behind it.

“We’ll get you to the church, come on!” Jason yelled.

Carl stabbed a walker in the forehead before running with Jason, Ron, Gabriel and the prayer meeting members towards the church. Fortunately it wasn’t far from the solar panels so they didn’t have much running to do. They made it to the church and threw open the door with the congregation piling inside along with anyone else who was in the street. Once enough people had gone in, Gabriel closed the door behind them.

“I have to help.” Gabriel told them after Jason gave him a confused look.

Jason quickly kicked a walker away from them, knocking it into the oncoming group to slow them down. He nodded to Gabriel and grabbed Carl’s hand as the four of them started running towards the house. The herd was flooding in rapidly and there were hundreds more still to come.

Rick was on the other side of the solar panels and was still firing at the walkers. He took out three in quick succession with well-aimed shots as he kept himself moving away from the walkers and from the others. He could only buy them so much time before he’d need to run for safety too.

“Rick!” Deanna called, rushing up to him amidst the chaos.

“You need to get back!” Rick demanded as he kept himself moving, firing at a fourth walker.

“We need to get back!” Deanna stressed, firing three shots at the oncoming herd with her own revolver before running after him.

All around them the herd continued its invasion, taking over huge portions of the land and sending an eye watering stench into the air as the corpses continued their march towards their prey.  

Further up the street, Carol and Morgan ran away from the holding cell as the herd was rapidly upon them. As they ran as fast as they could, Carol tripped and fell to the ground, slamming the side of her head against the bricks. She shook off the dazed feeling and grabbed the bullets she had dropped, glancing up in fear as the herd advanced towards her.

Once she was back on her feet she ran with Morgan but found the street was starting to get blocked off by the herd. The walkers were closing in around them leaving them no choice but to try and enter the houses to their left. Morgan helped push Carol up the stairs before smacking a walker in the head with his staff. He then used his staff to push one of the walkers back into the crowd before he too ran up the stairs and into the house, slamming the door behind him.

Gabriel was a quick learner as he had already got used to slashing his way through the walkers. Jason, Carl and Gabriel formed a protective circle around Ron who couldn’t attack the walkers head on. He had suggested using his gun moments before but Jason had demanded him not to as it the noise would just attract more of the herd towards them.

Jason slashed one of the walkers in the head, slicing into its skull with ease before pulling the blade out and kicking another walker away. There were too many of them to stand and fight so they had to keep moving, pushing through the herd and only attacking to create a path. He kept his eye on Carl at all times, making sure none of the walkers got too close to him. Jason knew Carl could handle walkers but all it ever took was one bite and he wouldn’t let it happen.

“Rick!” Deanna called as the man knocked a walker to the ground with his revolver. “Look out!”

One walker was about to grab Rick from behind but Deanna got in the way, grabbing it by the collar and placing her revolver under its chin. The walker outweighed her small frame and started pushing her back. Deanna quickly lost her balance as a second walker attacked her so she fired her gun and killed the first one before falling back onto the workbench. She yelped in pain as a couple of the saw blades dug into her leg and side.

Rick quickly grabbed her hand and pulled her up, shooting the second walker that had fallen down with her. The herd was just about to close in on them at this point so Rick held onto Deanna as he forced her to run with him. Deanna gasped in shock and pain as she ran with him, feeling the warm flow of blood start to seep out of her wounds with each movement. There was no stopping the herd.

Maggie was still by the collapsed guard tower. She had started running back towards the watch point she had previously been occupying but the herd was gaining on her surprisingly fast. One walker managed to grab onto her, impeding her movement and slowing her down. She tried to break free but the walker continued to grab and push her until she fell forward onto her knees.

Maggie quickly rolled onto her back and started backing away as fast as she could. She knew she had to get back to her feet or she would be dead in moments. She fired her rifle at the walker that had knocked her down before aiming up at the next two advancing walkers. She killed them with quick headshots and backed away some more as the herd continued to advance. She was going nowhere fast.

She killed a third walker and then heard the click of her gun running empty. Maggie scrambled to her feet and ran for the ladder to climb up onto the watch tower. She made it half way up the ladder before the herd was upon her, reaching up and grabbing at her feet while moving the ladder around as they pressed against it. The ladder wasn’t secure and too much movement would send it crashing down.

Maggie fought with the walkers and kicked herself free before climbing up high enough to grab onto the watch tower itself. As soon as she did the ladder shook violently before it folded up and collapsed into the undead crowd beneath her, leaving her hanging from the side of the watch point. Her muscles burned as she held her own weight, refusing to let go and fall to her death. She roared with effort as she pulled one of her legs up onto the platform, giving herself enough purchase to pull the rest of her body over the edge and roll into the middle of the platform.

The walkers below her crowded around the watch point, reaching their hands up in a desperate attempt to grab hold of their prey. They snarled and rasped hungrily while Maggie lay on her back panting, trying to get her breath back after such a close call. Looking up at the blue sky above her, she watched as Glenn’s balloons floated overhead.

Jason, Gabriel, Carl and Ron rushed through the herd as best they could. The walkers were starting to spread out in all directions making it difficult to simply run away. The continued slicing and stabbing at any walkers that got too close as they headed for the main street. The hungry chorus from the undead seemed to get louder and louder as more of them flooded into the community.

“Come on!” Jason bellowed. “They’re closing in on us!”

As he took the lead of the group he decapitated one of the walkers before shoulder barging another into a group. The herd was gradually forming a wall of rotting flesh around them, making it difficult to move. Carl stabbed a couple more walkers in the head as they got too close to him. Gabriel slashed his machete into the walkers when he could but he was starting to lose his nerve as they got closer and closer.

“Shit!” Jason cursed loudly.

The others looked ahead to find the herd had finally closed around them, boxing them in. They couldn’t fight their way out because any time spent on one side would allow the walkers on the other side to advance. Jason considered his options. He had to get Carl to safety no matter the cost. He sheathed his machete and took hold of his AKMSU. Jason knew if he ran and fired the gun it would create an opening for Carl, Gabriel and Ron to get away but he also knew he would have to stay behind.

Carl noticed him grab the gun and seemed to instinctively know what he had planned. Before he could argue the case with his boyfriend, the walkers ahead of them dropped to the ground as their heads were swiftly sliced apart. Michonne stood behind them with her sword in her hands, blood dripping from the blade.

“Come on!” She called to them.

They didn’t need to be told twice. The four of them ran with her towards the main street, resuming their tactic of striking any walkers that got too close with their bladed weapons. There was a large enough gap at the top of the street so they still had a chance to escape the invading army of undead. Once they broke through a smaller group of walkers they spotted Rick running up the street with Deanna at his side, a sea of corpses closely following behind.

“Rick!” Michonne called, getting the man’s attention as they joined up with him.

“Good, you’re safe!” Rick exclaimed. “Come on!”

Ron stayed by Deanna while Michonne, Gabriel, Carl and Jason kept to the sides. They sliced at any walkers that got too close while Rick and Deanna pointed them out. The street ahead was still clear so if they kept running they could make it to the houses. The herd was behind them and to their right side but the undead were slow and they were fast.

“There!” Deanna called out as Michonne sliced a walker with her sword.

“There!” She called out again, pointing out another walker which Gabriel sliced.

Two more walkers came from the same side which Carl and Jason dispatched with ease. The group stumbled to a stop when a large group of walkers came from the right and blocked the top of the street. The time it would take to kill them would allow the rest of the herd to catch up.

Before they could decide what to do, multiple gunshots rang out as the walkers in front of them dropped to the ground, their brain matter shooting through the air. As soon as all seven of the walkers dropped to the ground they spotted Jessie standing at the top of the street with her gun in her hands.

“Come on!” Jessie shouted. “I have Judith!”

The group ran with her towards her house. They crossed the street in record time, rushed up the stairs onto the porch and shot into the house, slamming the door behind them. Outside, the streets were being overrun with walkers leaving no safe zones outside of the buildings. Alexandria had been overrun.

 

The group rushed up the stairs, led by Jessie while Rick, Michonne and Jason helped carry Deanna up the staircase. Carl, Gabriel and Ron followed close behind as they all knew that it was safer to be upstairs than on the ground floor where the walkers might break in. Jessie shouted quick directions to them and guided them to a spare room with a sofa, the sound of Tiptoe Through The Tulips coming from one of the rooms.

“Go in there!” She shouted to them as she barged into her youngest son’s room. “Sam, I need you to turn off the music and shut the blinds!”

“Because of the monsters?” Sam asked as he watched Rick and Michonne place Deanna down on the sofa.

Michonne knelt down by her side to tend to her wounds while Rick rushed out the room to deal with barricading the house against the herd outside. He watched as Carl and Jason quickly rushed past the door with Carl carrying a crying Judith in his arms.

“You stay up here and you stay quiet, it’s gonna be okay.” Jessie told him quickly, stroking his cheek with her hand.

“Mum…” Sam began, not believing her from the way everyone was acting.

“Honey, just try, just pretend you’re somebody who’s not scared.” Jessie cut him off just as quickly. “Just try, okay?”

“Okay.” Sam replied weakly, nodding.

“Okay.” Jessie responded and kissed his forehead. “I love you!”

Jessie closed the door behind her after rushing out the room. She headed downstairs where Rick and Jason already were pulling the blinds closed and making sure the doors were all locked. The herd outside was massive, filling the streets completely like a dark, rotting river. Any noise or strong light that might catch the attention of even one walker could potentially be a death sentence. Jason knew from experience that in a herd, it only took one walker to be attracted to something for the rest of them to follow. The house wouldn’t survive it.

“That should do for now.” Rick commented, wiping the sweat from his brow now that they had all the doors and windows secured.

“We need a plan.” Jason pondered out loud as they headed for the stairs. “We’re not going to be able to stay here forever.”

“We’ll think of something.” Rick replied as they ascended the staircase. “We can take a moment to catch our breaths and patch up Deanna before we make any moves.”

Jason sighed in a mix of frustration and desperation. The herd wasn’t going to move on for a very long time and the slightest loud noise could bring all the walkers on top of them. He didn’t like it and he feared for their safety should anything unexpected happen.

 

Carol sat on the floor of the house she and Morgan had rushed into. She sat in relative darkness with her head resting against the wall as she listened to the chorus of groans from the undead army outside. Her right brow throbbed with pain as she felt the familiar warm trickle of blood drip from the wound. She had obviously been injured when she fell in the street outside.

Morgan returned from his position by the window and turned on a light, causing her to squint from the sudden change in brightness. She squeezed her eyes shut and rested her forehead against her hand as she tried to will the pain away.

“Let me take a look at that.” Morgan offered, placing his stick on the floor and crouching beside her.

“No.” Carol rejected him quickly, opening her eyes to look up at him. “I’m fine.”

“You don’t trust anybody, do you?” Morgan questioned.

“Some more than others.” Carol answered honestly. She trusted Rick and Daryl. “But you’re dead last.”

Morgan smiled as he stood back up. “Well, at least we’re being honest.”

“I don’t trust you but I never thought you were lying.” Carol told him as he walked back over to the window. “How is it out there?”

“They’re filling the streets.” Morgan answered.

When he turned round, he watched as Carol rose to her feet and attempted to walk, pausing to look warily at the staircase beside her. She wasn’t steady on her feet.

“Hey, it’s probably a concussion.” Morgan told her, rushing over. “You should sit down before you fall down.”

“I am okay.” Carol argued, swaying a little.

“Carol, whatever we have to settle it can wait.” Morgan told her, leaving his stick against the wall. “It has to.”

Carol nodded in defeat and slowly sat back down to rest against the wall again.

 

Rick and Jason reached the top of the stairs and quickly returned to the room where Deanna had been left. Michonne was still tending to her, bandaging the cut on her leg caused by the saw that she fell on.

“How is she?” Rick asked, relieved that they had a moment to catch their breaths.

“No offence to Michonne but whatever she’s doing hurts like a son of a bitch.” Deanna croaked in pain.

Jason couldn’t help but chuckle. “Probably means she’s doing a good job of it.”

“I just finished with the leg and that seems to be the worst of…” Michonne trailed off as she lifted the bottom of Deanna’s shirt.

She had spotted blood on the shirt and had expected it to be another cut from the saw. She felt her blood run cold when the source of the bleeding was revealed to be a bite. Deanna had been bitten when she fell on the saw blade and there was nothing that could be done. The bite was on her side and could not be amputated or removed in any way.

Rick’s own expression turned to horror as he looked at the bite. He thought he had prevented Deanna from being bitten but he had clearly been too slow. The community was going to lose its leader and it was his fault.

Jason closed his eyes and rested his hands on his hips as he shook his head. This was the last thing they needed. No matter what happened now, no matter what plans they came up with, one of them wasn’t going to live through it. Alexandria needed Deanna, she was the soul of the community and now she didn’t have long to live.

Deanna looked at the bite and then at the grim expressions on the others’ faces. She knew what it meant. Their reactions made it crystal clear that there was no hope for her to survive this. Suddenly faced with her own mortality, Deanna rested her head back on the pillows and held back her tears.

“Well…” Deanna groaned in grief and disappointment. “Shit.”

 

Jason and Carl were in the room at the end of the hall. By the design of the bedroom and the size of the bed, it appeared to be Jessie’s room. Carl sat on the edge of the bed and bounced his baby sister on his knee while Jason looked out the window. Outside, the once peaceful streets of Alexandria had been taken over by the undead. The walkers marched through the streets like a river of corpses. The constant chorus of hungry groans sent shivers down his spine.

Jason removed the magazine from his AKMSU and counted the bullets. He was glad he had grabbed the magwell extension as he knew the extra rounds were needed. The gun was fully loaded as were his two handguns, giving him plenty of ammunition to use should it be necessary. When he looked back out at the street, he realised that not even the one hundred and twenty bullets he could fire would put a dent in the herd. They were trapped between walls of steel and walls of death.

“Still wish your dad had let me lead the walkers away like I said I would.” Jason commented with a sigh, resting his arm against the window.

“Why?” Carl questioned as he continued to bounce Judith. “This could have still happened.”

“Yeah, it could have.” Jason replied. “But at least most of the walkers would have been following me instead.”

“But what if something happened?” Carl challenged him. “You could have died out there. Alone.”

“And if I had, then any lives lost from now on would have been saved.” Jason argued calmly. “It would be better than having everyone I care about trapped like this.”

Carl sighed and placed Judith in her cot before wrapping his arms around Jason’s waist from behind, looking out at the street.

“And I’d rather be trapped in here with you than worry about you.” Carl confessed, pressing the side of his face against Jason’s back. “I’m still glad my dad didn’t agree to it.”

Jason let out a shaky breath. “Deanna got bit. She’s gonna die. It could have been you.”

“Or it could have been you.” Carl added, tightening his hold of Jason.

Jason broke the embrace and turned around. He held Carl’s face in his hands and pulled him in for a gentle kiss, feeling himself relax into the kiss just like Carl did. When they broke apart, Jason stared into Carl’s blue eyes and smiled softly, stroking the younger teen’s cheek.

“I’ll make sure you and Judith survive this.” Jason told him. “I promise. Even if I have to kill every single walker out there with my bare hands.”

“I know you will.” Carl smiled and kissed him again.

 

Rick and Jessie looked out the window and onto the street outside. The walkers were grouping together so much that it was impossible to actually see the street. The herd almost looked like one single, shaking creature that lay inside the community. Despite it being half of the original herd at the quarry, it was still the largest herd Rick had ever had to deal with since he woke up in the hospital.

“The fever’s setting in.” Rick informed Jessie about Deanna’s condition. “She doesn’t have long. She knows how it happens, right? All of it?”

“Yeah, she knows.” Jessie practically whispered.

“She’s cracking jokes.” Rick commented, his voice shaky.

Jessie placed her hand on his face for comfort. “Rick, she wouldn’t have run.”

Rick didn’t respond right away. He felt responsible for Deanna’s death and it was a piercing guilt that he was struggling to ignore. If Deanna had just run away she would have been fine, she could have survived this. Instead, she ran over to help him and got herself killed. He had to put things right.

“We have food and water to last us a while. They’re bound to cluster up like that before they move off to one area.” Rick explained to Jessie. He knew what walkers were like. “When they do, I’ll try to get to the armoury, draw them away.”

“With guns?” Jessie asked, unsure of the safety of Rick’s plan.

“With flares. I’ll open the gate and fire them off.” Rick explained. “See if I can get them somewhere. Somewhere that’s not here.”

 

“The plans that you gave Rick, I’ve been looking them over.” Michonne told Deanna as she sat with her. “I get it. They could work.”

“Even now?” Deanna asked, her face slowly going pale.

“Even now.” Michonne repeated with a smile, which Deanna shared. “The Latin in the margins, what was that?”

“It was something Reg used to say when things went really really bad.” Deanna replied slowly, her strength fading.

Michonne smiled back at the dying leader. Despite the terrible situation and the fact that she was slowly dying, Deanna appeared to be in high spirits. She was coming to terms with her impending death and was making peace with herself.

“I’m lucky, Michonne. Working with my family towards a better future is all I ever wanted.” Deanna explained with a weak smile as she reflected on her life. “That’s what I got. I got to do what I wanted right up to the end.”

Michonne felt her lip quiver as she listened to Deanna. Despite the positivity Deanna was radiating, it felt all the more tragic. Spencer was the only family that Deanna had left and because of the walkers, he wasn’t going to be at his mother’s bed side as she died. Her son wasn’t going to get to say goodbye. It wasn’t fair.

“What do you want?” Deanna asked the samurai.

“I want this place to work.” Michonne answered firmly.

“Yes, but what does that mean for you?” Deanna pressed. It was a deeply personal question. “What do you want for you?”

Michonne thought for a moment. She had never stopped to consider what she wanted from life.  “I don’t know.”

“You better.” Deanna told her, not wanting the samurai to die with regrets.

The sound of someone clearing their throat caught Michonne’s attention. She turned round to find Jason standing in the doorway with a grim expression on his face. When Deanna looked up at him he forced a sombre smile as he stepped into the room. Michonne gave a similar smile and grabbed her sword before leaving the room.

Jason sat down where Michonne had been seated and took Deanna’s hand in his own. “Hey.”

“Hey.” Deanna croaked in response.

Jason hesitated for a few moments. “I wanted to apologise for before. I was pretty horrible to you, more than once.”

“Forget it.” Deanna answered with a small shake of her head. “It’s water under the bridge or over the dam or wherever you like to put it.”

“I’m still sorry.” Jason pressed, squeezing her hand gently.

Deanna stared at him for a few seconds before smiling weakly. “Apology accepted.”

Jason nodded, swallowing heavily. “I also wanted to thank you for this place and for letting us in. It’s because of you that Carl and I have had so much quality time together. We wouldn’t have had that out there.”

“It wasn’t just me.” Deanna countered gently. Her husband and many others deserved credit.

“No but you were in charge. You were what kept this place together.” Jason told her. “I’m not sure how we’re going to manage without you.”

“As flattering as it is, that’s bullshit.” Deanna replied with a smile. “You’ll all make this place better, safer than I ever could.”

Jason nodded as he reflected. “When I blackmailed you, you could have stopped me. You could have fought back. Why didn’t you?”

“Because despite our differences I knew then, as I knew when I met you and as I know now, that you are a noble young man.” Deanna answered, taking her time with such a long sentence.

“I wouldn’t say I’m noble.” Jason chuckled incredulously. “Far from it, actually.”

“You are. You’ve always been honest with me.” Deanna answered before challenging him. “So, be honest with me now. Will Alexandria survive this?”

Jason smiled and nodded. “Yeah, it will. We’ll survive and rebuild.” Jason smiled as he nodded. “We’ll make this place better and safer. I’ll see to it personally. For you.”

Deanna squeezed Jason’s hand and shook her head. “Don’t do it for me. Do it for your family. For Carl. For Judith. Promise me.”

Jason nodded slowly. “I promise.”

“Good.” Deanna smiled and let go of his hand.

 

Carl watched as Ron stormed through the house on the ground floor before disappearing into one of the rooms. He heard the door shut as he descended the stairs to check on him. Carl knew Ron would be struggling with the current situation as it was unlike anything he had ever experienced before. He needed support and advice.

“Ron?” Carl called quietly as he opened the garage door.

His eyes scanned the garage. The garage was filled with bicycles, exercise equipment, loose tools and bits of metal along with what looked like engine parts. He didn’t know what half of the stuff was but the sports equipment was far more recognisable. Carl’s eyes finally found Ron leaning over the work bench in the corner of the garage.

“Hey.” Carl greeted as he stepped inside, closing the door behind him. “You alright, man?”

“Enid’s dead, we’re all dead.” Ron croaked, his voice breaking through obvious tears.

“Look, my Dad’s gonna figure something out.” Carl assured his friend. “He always does.”

“That’s bullshit!” Ron retorted, whipping round and squaring up to Carl. “Your dad’s just gonna get more people killed. Because that’s what he does. That’s who he is. Your dad’s a killer.”

Carl glared back at his distraught friend. “So was yours.”

Ron stared past Carl, speechless. He was trying to process all the thoughts flying through his mind like a whirlwind. Rick and his people came to Alexandria and destroyed his previously peaceful life. Rick killed his father and then seduced his mother. Carl stole Enid from him. Jason bullied him and looked down on him. Rick’s whole family just seemed to exist for the sole purpose of hurting him.

Carl could see the pain in his friend’s eyes. “We need to work this out.”

“I’m dead, Carl.” Ron croaked. “My mum is dead. My brother is.”

“No, they’re not.” Carl retorted as Ron walked past him towards the door. “We’re gonna make it.”

“You’re dead.” Ron growled as he locked the door. “You’re dead too.”

Carl watched as Ron pocketed the keys before reaching for his Glock. The crying, the resentment and the remark that he was going to die all suddenly hit Carl. Ron was locking him in the garage and was stupid enough to plan to shoot him. If he did, the gunshot would attract the walkers and get everyone killed.

“We’re all dead.” Ron finished as he turned around.

As soon as he did, Carl slammed into him with all his force, smashing him against the locked door and forcing him down. Ron roared with exertion as he pushed back against Carl, pressing his foot against the door before kicking off and sending them both crashing against a set of metal shelves before dropping to the floor.

Ron dropped the gun but when they crashed into the shelves they had knocked a shovel to the floor between them. Ron grabbed it as Carl scrambled to his feet to create distance between them, his mind racing to remember something Jason had taught him about fighting armed opponents. Carl ducked and side stepped as Ron slammed the shovel down at his head, missing and smashing one of the panels of the glass door instead. The sharp sound of glass smashing instantly attracted the walkers outside. Carl grabbed onto the shovel as well, keeping his arms loose so that he moved with Ron instead of getting yanked around, a small detail he remembered Jason mentioning.

Rick, Jessie and Jason all thundered down the stairs together, all of them having heard the commotion in the garage and the smashing of the window. Rick shouted Carl’s name as the three of them reached the door and found it locked, the sounds of Carl and Ron roaring and growling on the other side.

Jason’s heart pounded in his chest as he tried to work out what was going on in the garage. Had the walkers gotten in or was Ron attacking Carl? There had to be a reason for the door being locked and he needed to find out. Jason pushed Rick aside before shoulder barging the door in an attempt to break it down but he failed. As he heard more roars and banging on the other side of the door he tried to kick the door open, slamming his foot against the lock with a powerful kick that also failed to open it.

Ron suddenly surprised Carl by pushing him against the door again. He used Carl’s loose arms to his advantage and pushed the bar of the shovel against Carl’s neck, causing the other boy to gasp out as he choked from the pressure against his throat. Outside, the walkers broke through the gate and were marching towards the broken glass door now that Carl was in their sights. Carl tried to force the shovel away from him as he heard Jason, Rick and Jessie calling their names.

“Carl!” Rick shouted as Jason kicked the lock again. “Open the door!”

“Ron, open the door!” Jessie shouted as Jason kicked a third time.

“Carl!” Jason bellowed as he kicked the door a fourth time. “I’m coming!”

Jason slammed his shoulder against the door again, cursing in frustration as he tried desperately to get in. He slammed against it a third time, faster and harder than before. He needed to get into that garage. Carl needed him. He was stronger than this. He could break a door. Jason roared as he smashed himself against the door yet again before Rick grabbed his shoulder.

“Back up!” He barked and pulled out his axe.

Rick quickly started chopping the door handle and lock to separate it from the wood. The axe proved to be far more effective than Jason’s brute force as the wood immediately started to splinter as the metal loosened.

Carl roared as he finally forced Ron back and shoved him onto his back on the floor. He quickly looked behind him as the first walkers reached the door and started snarling as they reached in. The corpses tried to reach the boys but were unable to as they pressed up against the door. Carl quickly tried to move the set of metal shelves and use them to block the door but it was a flimsy defence at best.

Ron watched Carl in a daze, his previous adrenaline and bloodlust fading away. He heard Rick chopping away at the lock as it broke apart with Jason barking for him to go faster. He turned to his left and grabbed his gun off the floor, tucking it back into the back of his jeans before scrambling for the door. The door swung open as Rick and Jason stood in the doorway, parting to let him rush past as Carl followed suit.

The wooden supports and glass panels of the side door broke and smashed as the walkers broke into the garage. They quickly flooded the room and marched towards the broken door that was being held shut by Ron, Jessie, Jason and Carl. The walkers pounded against the door, threatening to push it open now that it didn’t have a lock on it.

“Watch out!” Rick barked as he and Gabriel brought a sofa through from the living room.

They rested the sofa against the door at an angle and pushed against it to keep it in place. They just needed to wait for the walkers to get distracted so they wouldn’t pound on the door so much. Rick hoped that the sofa was heavy enough to keep them from forcing the door open.

“We need more and we need to be quiet!” Rick told the others as they wrestled with the walkers.

“I’ll see what I can find!” Michonne replied and rushed off into one of the other rooms.

Rick, Gabriel, Jessie, Carl and Jason remained with the sofa, pushing against it to stop the walkers from forcing the door open and knocking it over. The strength of this group of walkers was impressive and it gave them a terrifying example of what the whole herd could do if it converged on one spot. It would tear the whole house down.

“Hey, what happened in there?” Rick asked Carl as Jason listened intently.

“We were looking for some tools and knocked over a shelf.” Carl lied as they wrestled with the walkers.

“We heard Ronald.” Jessie commented.

“Yeah, Ron saw them break through the gates.” Carl lied again, making it up as he went along. “We had to move.”

“That was an awful lot of roaring and shouting.” Jason remarked cynically. He knew Carl and he knew when he was lying.

“It sounded like you were fighting.” Jessie added, completing Jason’s suspicion.

“Yeah, we were fighting them!” Ron retorted before storming off.

They all watched him go into one of the other rooms to be alone. He was acting strangely, regardless of the circumstances.

“Carl?” Rick challenged. “It’s okay?”

Carl pulled away from the sofa and straightened his hat. “It’s okay.”

Carl rushed off to follow Ron, leaving Rick, Jessie and Jason with the sofa. Rick and Jason shared a glance. Jason knew exactly what Rick’s glare was telling him. He didn’t believe it either.

“I’ll find out what really happened.”  Jason nodded to Rick before backing away and following the younger teens.

Carl opened the door to check he had found the right room before stepping inside and closing it behind him. Ron was at the far end of the room with his back turned to Carl, he looked much smaller and far less harmless than he had been moments before. Carl unholstered his Beretta and aimed it at Ron.

“Listen, I…uh…” Ron stuttered.

“Hand the gun over first!” Carl hissed at the other teen.

Ron froze with fear as the tables had been turned. “Carl, I’m sorry…”

Carl glared at Ron. He wasn’t sorry for trying to kill him. He was sorry that he failed and was now having to face the consequences. He had lost the element of surprise and was scared. Ron was a coward. A violent coward. Just like his father.

“Yeah, I know!” Carl spat back. “Now give me the gun!”

Ron pulled out the gun slowly and held it by the barrel before handing it over to Carl. The young Grimes took the Glock and stuffed it into the back of his jeans, his chequered shirt hiding it from view as he holstered his own gun.

“Look, man. I get it. My dad killed your dad.” Carl told him with a sigh. “But you need to know something. Your dad was an asshole.”

Ron stared at Carl, unsure of how to respond. He wasn’t wrong about his father but it didn’t make it any less painful. Both teens jumped as the door opened and Jason stepped inside, closing the door behind him.

“Jason!” Carl began, putting on the act again. “We were just talking and…”

“Save it.” Jason cut him off with a raised hand. “I’m not stupid.”

Carl cast his gaze to the floor momentarily. He should have known better than to try and lie to his boyfriend, the very thing he had been angry at Jason for doing before.

“Don’t worry. I’m not going to tell the others.” Jason told the two younger teens. “You lied but right now that was the right thing to do.”

Carl looked up in surprise. He expected Jason to create a scene or at least tell Rick the truth. Ron had tried to kill Carl and Carl had lied to protect him. It didn’t make sense for Jason to do the same thing. As he thought about it, Jason crossed the room and squared up to Ron, grabbing the younger teen by his shirt collar.

“I hope you’re listening very carefully because I’m only going to tell you once.” Jason growled, glaring directly into Ron’s frightened eyes. “If you ever try to hurt him again, you best pray something else kills you before I can. Because I’ll make you suffer more than you can imagine. Understand?”

Ron swallowed thickly and nodded rapidly. He half expected Jason to do something to him right there and then. Jason wanted to but with the herd outside he couldn’t risk it. He let go of the younger teen and turned to Carl without saying anything. The two lovers shared a look to make sure they were on the same page. They were. Jason would stay true to his word if Ron tried anything again.

A loud crash from outside brought them back to reality and their current predicament. Carl was the first to open the door as the three of them returned to the front room where Michonne and Gabriel were peering through the curtains at the herd outside. Jessie entered the room, recognising the crashing sound that had come from outside.

“They knocked the sculpture over.” She told them, referring to the metallic owl sculpture she had built.

“All that noise.” Michonne commented, cringing as she watched the walkers stumble closer. “It’s drawing more.”

Carl stood with his gun in his hands, preparing himself in case the walkers started to break in through the window or front doors. Jason stood beside him, keeping an eye on Ron while he gripped the handles of his AKMSU tighter. He knew something had to be done about Ron but the walkers were far more important. He felt uneasy. Something was bound to go wrong.

“Jason.” Rick called quietly as he entered the room.

Jason nodded and walked over to Rick so that they were out of Carl’s hearing range.

“What happened with those two?” Rick rasped, keeping his voice down.

Jason glanced over at Carl and Ron and sighed. He didn’t want to tell Rick right away because the man had more important things to worry about. Yet at the same time he had given Rick his word he would find out the truth and he had. He had to decide who to side with. Carl or Rick.

A sudden loud cry from one of the upstairs bedrooms made everyone jump. Judith was crying for attention and was making full use of her powerful lungs. Jason exhaled a breath he didn’t realise he had been holding. He was thankful for the interruption as Rick’s attention was diverted to his baby daughter.

“I’ll get her.” He told the others before rushing up the staircase.

Jason turned back round to find Carl staring over at him. He could tell the younger teen was trying to work out if Jason had double crossed him and told Rick. Jason slowly shook his head and watched as Carl’s shoulders dropped the concerns that had made them tense moments before.

 

Rick made it to the top of the stairs where he could hear Judith’s cries even louder than before. Sam was still playing the music in his room, so Rick grabbed the door handle with the intention of telling the boy to turn off the music. However, the sudden silence from Judith prompted him to look up. He turned to his left and found the sofa vacant with only a patch of dried blood where Deanna used to be.

Rick’s blood ran cold as he let out a shaky breath. Deanna might have turned already and Judith’s cries could have led her walker-self right to the bedroom. Rick walked down the hallway, trying to be as quiet as possible so he wasn’t taken by surprise. He pulled the axe out of his belt and reached the bedroom door.

Rick gently pushed the door open and felt horror shoot through his body as he spotted Deanna’s body on its knees reaching into the crib. He tightened his grip on the handle of the axe and thrust the door open before rushing towards her to save his daughter.

“No! It’s still me!” Deanna shouted quickly as soon as Rick grabbed her.

Rick let go of her and stepped back, his legs shaking from the sudden adrenaline and the terror of almost killing Deanna in cold blood. He lowered the axe as he panted, sweat running down his face as Deanna did the same.

“I’m sorry.” Rick apologised and stuffed the axe into his utility belt. “I’m sorry.”

“I wanted to see her one last time.” Deanna explained, growing weaker. “I thought I could make it. My legs had other plans.”

Rick draped one of her arms over his shoulder before lifting her legs and carrying her to the bed. He set her down gently and took another few deep breaths, noticing how much paler she had become.

“You and your plans.” He commented with a smirk.

“They’re yours now.” Deanna replied, her breath shuddering as if she was cold.

“From now on someone needs to be with you.” Rick told her, his face grim as they both realised what it meant.

“Yeah…” Deanna sighed, quietly resenting her impending death.

“It can’t be her.” Rick added, looking over at Judith.

“Yep.” Deanna responded with a depressed smile.

“I’ll find someplace else to put her.” Rick told her, preparing to grab his daughter.

“Rick!” Deanna beckoned him back over, pulling out some pieces of paper. “I wrote something for Spencer, for Maggie.”

Rick took the pieces of paper from her and pocketed them. “I’ll make sure they get them.”

“Will you look out for him?” Deanna asked the man beside her, resting her hand on one of his.

“I will.” Rick replied, feeling tears stinging his eyes.

“Will you look out for him like you look out for your people?” Deanna asked, referencing their conversation from before the tower fell.

Rick stared down at her, feeling partly guilty for her not being able to properly say goodbye to her son. He also knew that he didn’t care about Spencer like he cared about his own family. It wouldn’t be right to make a promise he wasn’t going to keep.

“Guess what?” Deanna challenged, sensing his inner conflict. “They’re all your people, Rick. They are.”

“We haven’t had a chance to make it that.” Rick countered. Deanna was still the leader, even now.

“But that’s how it is.” Deanna retorted with a smile. “I didn’t run over to help you out there because I like you, or because I think you’re a good man, a good father, or that you can grow one hell of a beard.”

Rick couldn’t help but smirk in amusement at that final remark. It was one of the first and few amusing conversations they had when he shaved the beard off completely. Everyone had passed some kind of comment.

“I ran over to help because you are one of us.” Deanna finished with a wise smirk. “That’s the right answer.”

 

 “You alright?” Morgan asked as he observed Carol sitting with her eyes closed.

“Just resting my eyes.” Carol answered sleepily.

Morgan rested his stick against the wall and stepped down two of the stairs. He realised that they were above the holding cell, the very place he had wanted to keep Carol away from before the tower collapsed. At least he knew they were secure in the building.

The light that he had turned on earlier suddenly switched off, returning the earlier darkness. He ascended the stairs and looked at the bulb. When he did, he noticed that Carol had disappeared.

“Carol?” He called out in confusion.

When he received no answer, he started slowly making his way across the room. It wasn’t a big building and there weren’t many places to hide. He also knew that Carol wasn’t stupid enough to go outside so she had to be up to something. A sudden movement caught his attention and when he turned to his left Carol slammed into him and knocked him off his feet before rushing down the stairs towards the holding cell.

Carol unlocked the door at the bottom of the staircase and rushed inside the cell with her knife in her hand. The sight that greeted her confirmed her suspicions. Denise was on her knees with an IV bag as she tended to a man in dark clothes with long black hair. On his forehead was the unmistakable W scar. The same man who had attacked Morgan in the house the day before.

“Get the hell away from him!” Carol barked at Denise.

“He’s tied up he…” Denise attempted to mount a defence.

“I said get the hell away from him!” Carol repeated.

Denise quickly scurried out the way just as Morgan descended the stairs and stood between Carol and the Wolf with his staff at the ready. Things were not going according to plan.

“This could have waited. It should have.” Morgan argued. It really was not the time. “Now it can’t.”

 

Jason stood in the front room with the others, Carl, Jessie, Gabriel and Ron, while Michonne searched the other rooms for more furniture that could be used as a barricade. They could hear the walkers outside on the porch, groaning and shuffling incessantly, watching the shadows pass by the curtains. Jason let his AKMSU fall by his side, held onto his shoulders by the strap, so he could place a hand on the back of Carl’s neck. The younger teen instinctively tilted his head back, enjoying the gentle, comforting rubbing Jason’s hand performed on the skin.

It was as they stood there, calm in the middle of a storm, that Jason realised it was too easy, too good to be true. One of the walkers tripped over the remains of the owl sculpture, creating more noise as the metal pieces skid across the wooden porch. The walker itself fell, slamming against the wooden board that covered the hole in the front window. The wooden board vibrated against the window with a sudden dull drumming noise. It was enough to attract the attention of the walkers on the porch. All it took was for one walker to bang against the board and prompt the rest to do the same.

“Shit!” Jason cursed as the board moved and a couple walkers peered in. They knew.

Jason rushed up to the board at the same time as Gabriel and Jessie. The walkers were pushing against the wooden panel which was already quite loose without the added pressure. There were so many walkers on the porch, making it difficult for the three of them to hold the board in place. They were going to get in soon, it was only a matter of when not if.

“Rick!” Jessie shouted for their leader.

Carl and Ron upended the coffee table and stacked it against the window but it provided little assistance to them. The walkers tore down the wooden board and started trying to reach in while continuing to press against the window. The group of living people on the other side were struggling to keep the hungry corpses at bay.

Rick rapidly thundered down the stairs and into the room, slamming up against the window with the others to keep the walkers from getting in. The window shook violently as both sides wrestled with one another as the commotion attracted more and more walkers to the house. The smell was nauseating and the noise of their snarls was deafening.

“There’s just too many of them!” Gabriel exclaimed as he struggled to hold them back.

“Carl, get back!” Jason called as he reached for his machete.

The front door that had been barricaded with several heavy chairs and a dining table was forced open by the herd. The walkers started streaming in from there leaving the group no choice but to abandon the window as well.

“Everyone get upstairs now!” Michonne bellowed as she started slicing the walkers with her sword.

Jason held the line with her, splitting the skulls of the invading walkers with his machete. One of the walkers closed in on him but he shoulder barged it before forcing his machete into its skull. The blade got stuck in the bone, almost causing Jason to topple over as more walkers closed in. He kicked the closest walker back into the group behind it before pulling the blade free with a grunt of effort.

“Jason! Now!” Rick roared from the stairs as the walkers filtered in from two different openings.

Jason backed up to the stairs as Michonne and Rick pulled the upturned sofa away from the garage door and used it to block the staircase. The lower level of the house filled with walkers in record time as the corpses continued to flood in from now three different openings. The walkers tried to pile against the sofa but the hallway was too narrow and the sofa was at a perfect angle which prevented it from being moved. The corpses stretched out their arms at the group as they snarled in frustration.

“I got this one, you get the one behind it.” Rick told Michonne, gesturing to the closest walker. “We’re gonna need at least two.”

Jason, Carl, Jessie and Ron stood on the landing and watched as Rick and Michonne killed the two walkers and manoeuvred them past the sofa. They dragged the corpses up the stairs and past them.

“Stay here.” Rick told them. “You see any of them squeezing through you get me.”

“If any squeeze through I’ll take care of it.” Jason responded, tapping the handle of his sheathed machete.

“You get me.” Rick repeated just as sternly as he dragged the corpse into the room they had originally kept Deanna in.

Jason looked down at the walkers as he stood next to Carl who held his Beretta in his hands in case anything went wrong. He studied the rotting faces of the undead, their teeth snapping impatiently as they stared hungrily up at their prey. All those rotting, frightening faces that used to be living, smiling people. Each walker had a story, had a life before all of this. It was easy to forget they were once people.

“Do you ever feel sorry for them?” Jason asked his younger lover.

Carl shrugged. “Not really. They’re not people anymore.”

“True but they were people once.” The older teen commented. “It’s sad.”

Jason let the silence remain. They were all considering it, all of them reflecting on the people they knew who had since died and turned. It was a sharp pain that never went away. When Jessie followed Rick through to the other room, Jason took a few steps closer to the door so he could listen in on their conversation.

“We’re gonna need bedsheets!” Rick told them as Gabriel and Michonne stood to attention. “Enough for everyone!”

“Bedsheets for what?” Jessie asked, clearly confused.

“We all go to the armoury.” Rick answered, pulling out his knife.

“How?” Jessie questioned, even more confused than before.

“We’re gonna gut these things, cover ourselves with the insides, it’ll mask our smell and make them think we’re like them.” Rick explained as he and Michonne got ready.

Jessie, Ron and Gabriel all looked back at him in a mixture of horror and confusion. The idea of walking through the herd seemed like insanity to them all.

“I’ve done it before.” Rick added, sensing their fears. “We stay calm, we don’t draw attention, we can move right through them.”

“He’s right.” Jason added from the dividing doorway. “I’ve had to do it a couple times as well. It works.”

“They’re in the house, they’re making noise, more are coming.” Michonne added, trying to stress their desperation.

Rick and Michonne started cutting into the walkers, slicing them open to reveal their decomposing organs. The smell was horrifically wretched in the small, enclosed space. Gabriel lurched, close to vomiting while Ron went visibly pale. Jason lifted one of his gloved hands to his face as his eyes watered from the stench.

“Anyone who stays here is gonna die.” Rick told them.

“If they manage to get past that sofa and make it up here we’ll have nowhere to run.” Jason added. “Too many walkers and too little space, we wouldn’t even be able to fight our way out. We need to leave if we want to live.”

“What about Deanna?” Gabriel questioned, reminding them all that she was still with them.

“She doesn’t have long left but she has a gun.” Jason answered. “She can stop herself from turning. If she can’t, then I’ll do it.”

“You don’t have to.” Michonne told him, not wanting him to shoulder that responsibility.

“I know.” Jason responded curtly. “But I can if she needs me to.”

Rick and Michonne shared a look before they started scooping the insides out of the walkers’ chest cavities.

 

“You don’t need the knife.” Morgan said as he stared Carol down. “We can talk.”

“No, this is over.” Carol responded, shaking her head as she held her knife out.

“We can be better than them.” Morgan argued. They didn’t have to kill the Wolf, he was no longer a threat to them.

“We are better than them!” Carol retorted. They weren’t the ones destroying communities and slaughtering the inhabitants.

“Not if we kill!” Morgan barked.

“They made us kill. We had to stop it.” Carol told him, remembering how she, Aaron, Rosita, Carl and Jason had defended Alexandria. “I had to stop it.”

“Where there’s life, there’s possibility.” Morgan argued. “Even if we never let him out.”

“I’d get out.” The Wolf commented, his face pale from the infection he had.

“Even if we never let him out!” Morgan barked over him. “He could know what he’s done, he could know!”

Carol knew the Wolf didn’t have a conscience. It was pointless. “I don’t want to have to kill you, Morgan.”

“You won’t.” Morgan countered calmly.

“I will.” Carol spat back, her voice shaking as she brandished her knife.

“You can’t.” Morgan reaffirmed. “I won’t let you.”

 

Michonne opened the bedroom door and stepped inside, closing it quietly behind her. Deanna was laying on the bed with her eyes closed, her face ghostly pale and her hair damp from cold sweat. The only evidence that she was still alive was the laboured rise and fall of her chest. The samurai placed a hand on Deanna’s arm as she sat down beside her.

Deanna shook as she woke, her breathing coming out in pants from the scare she had just been given. For a moment she had thought Michonne was a walker as she had dozed and had been dreaming. Her breathing slowed down when her eyes landed on Michonne and she realised she was safe.

“What’s happening out there?” Deanna croaked weakly.

“They’re getting in.” Michonne explained. “The rest of us, we’re gonna have to go.”

Deanna’s face fell as she understood the implication. She couldn’t go with them because she was already on death’s door. They were being forced to leave her to the mercy of the walkers and the infection that was destroying her body.

“If you want me to, I’ll…” Michonne began, offering to euthanize her.

 “No. Not ready. Not yet. I will be. Soon. And when I am.” Deanna answered weakly, pulling out her revolver. “I’ll do it myself. It’s my life. From start to finish. Dolor hic tibi proderit olum.”

Michonne recognised the Latin as the same from the plan’s margins. “What does it mean?”

Deanna let out a tired breath. “Someday this pain will be useful to you.”

Deanna stroked Michonne’s cheek as the samurai’s lip quivered, tears stinging the corners of her eyes as she took Deanna’s hand in her own. She hated having to leave Deanna there, having to say goodbye to the leader of the community but there was no other choice.

“Go. They need you.” Deanna told her, smiling.

Michonne nodded and stood up. “Thank you.”

“For what?” Deanna questioned, confused.

“For believing.” Michonne replied. It was the strength of Deanna’s beliefs that had created Alexandria.

“I still believe. I cocked it all up but I figured it out.” Deanna replied, grabbing Michonne’s hand. “What do you want? Now you figure it out.”

“I will.” Michonne answered with conviction. That was one promise she would keep.

“Good.” Deanna responded, smiling again. “Give ‘em Hell.”

 

Michonne returned to the room in the hallway as Rick was helping Gabriel cover himself with the walker guts. They had cut the bedsheets into ponchos so they could all wear them without the risk of them falling off. Jason was helping Carl and in return Carl was helping Jason. The samurai couldn’t help but smile at the pair, they were more alike and more in-sync with one another each day. It was a beautiful thing to watch.

Michonne slipped on her own poncho and started scooping up the guts to cover the sheet. The smell was just as repulsive as ever but everyone was starting to get used to it. Rick had also started covering himself with the rotting organs and coagulated blood. This was their best bet of surviving the horde outside.

“We need to move.” Rick said to Jessie, scooping up some of the insides for her. “You and me.”

Jessie crouched down beside him. “I’ll do it.”

Just as she started covering her own poncho with the innards while Ron looked on in disgust, Sam’s bedroom door opened. The music filled the room and riled up the walkers at the bottom of the stairs as the young boy looked on in absolute horror. He couldn’t even begin to make sense of what he was seeing.

“Mum?” He asked in shock.

“You need to listen to me, okay?” Jessie tried to explain to him. “We aren’t safe here anymore. We need to do this so we can be safe out there, we need to look like the monsters.”

“No, please, no.” Sam begged, terrified at the idea of going outside.

“Yes, Sam, please. Honey, we have to go, okay? We have to, Sam.” Jessie argued soothingly. “Honey, just pretend you’re brave, okay? Just make it all pretend, okay? None of this is real and you’re somebody who isn’t afraid, okay?”

“Okay…” Sam gasped out. He was on the verge of tears and so was Jessie.

Jason watched the two of them, listening to the conversation while studying Sam’s face. He grimaced as he came to a predicted conclusion. The boy had obviously been protected from the world by his mother his whole life. Pete had been an abusive drunk, much like Jason’s uncle, and the marriage had somehow survived past the apocalypse. Jessie had allowed herself and her children to be abused by that monster of a man for who knows how long.

The results of it all were clear. Ron was taking out his anger on Carl, trying to kill him because Rick killed his father. Jason wouldn’t be surprised if Ron wanted to kill him as well, given that he didn’t put up with any of the angsty teen’s behaviour. Then through everything that had happened since with the Wolves’ attack and the herd at the gates, Sam had been allowed to just lock himself away in his room. Jessie’s best encouragement was for him to pretend and maybe he was really good at pretending. But what happened when he stopped pretending?

Jason sighed as he came to the only conclusion that there could be. The young boy wasn’t prepared for the world, he wasn’t prepared in the slightest. He was terrified, immature and naïve. In a few minutes, this frightened child was going to have to walk among hundreds of hungry corpses for what could be more than an hour. Jason didn’t think Sam would make it. The boy was too fragile and it filled him with worry.

Ron was also still at the forefront of Jason’s mind. His erratic and irrational behaviour could flare up at any moment. If he flew off the handle outside in the middle of the herd then they could all be killed. Jason’s hand instinctively rested on the handle of his machete. If anything went wrong he would need to be prepared to kill either Ron or Sam or even both of them. He felt sick to his stomach at the idea of killing a young child but if it kept Carl safe then he knew he wouldn’t hesitate.

“You okay?” Carl asked, his hand finding Jason’s under their ponchos.

“Yeah, yeah. Just getting ready.” Jason exhaled deeply. “For out there.”

“We’ll be alright.” Carl affirmed. “We can do this.”

Jason smiled and gave Carl a quick kiss. “I know.”

 

“I will kill you to kill him.” Carol threatened, her hand shaking as it held the knife. “Because I don’t want anyone else to die!”

“You should kill me.” The Wolf spoke up, knowing he’d finish what he started. “But you’re all going to die. You don’t belong here.”

“You tell me you’re sure.” Carol continued, glaring at Morgan. “You tell me you know how it will happen, how it will go.”

Morgan was about to speak but couldn’t find the words. He had no way of knowing how it would all turn out, if he was making the right choice or not. There was a chance that the man he was defending could change, despite the despicable things he had done before. He could change and be helpful to the group. If he let Carol kill him there would be no way of knowing for sure.

“Step aside.” Carol ordered with a venomous tone. “I’m not asking you again.”

Morgan grit his teeth. He had to take the chance. He swung his stick and disarmed Carol, knocking her knife out of her hand. She quickly threw the keys at him before kicking his staff out of his hands and against his leg. Carol rushed for her knife but Morgan grabbed her leg, forcing her to try and crawl her way towards her knife, stretching her fingers to try and reach it.

Unfortunately, Morgan was larger and stronger than Carol and started to pull her back. She stopped struggling and kicked Morgan in the face, pulling away from his grip and grabbed her knife before scrambling to her feet again. She swung her knife at Morgan but he dodged and grabbed her arms, wrestling with her to prevent her from stabbing him. Carol broke free and wrapped an arm around Morgan’s head but he used one arm to stop her knife while the other grabbed her leg to knock her off balance. As soon as she lost her balance, Morgan used both arms to lift her off her feet and slam her back down onto the floor, knocking her unconscious.

Morgan stared down at Carol’s unconscious form, hoping that he hadn’t done any serious damage in that moment. He barely heard Denise shout to him before a sharp pain exploded in the back of his head and forced him to fall to the floor. The Wolf stood over Morgan with the stick in his hands. It was time to make his escape.

“No!” Denise shouted, attempting to rush towards him.

The Wolf quickly pulled out Morgan’s knife and pointed it at her, a satisfied smirk on his face. Things had worked out in his favour in a way he hadn’t expected. He used Morgan’s knife to cut the cloth that bound his wrists together, smiling at his new found freedom.

“Please.” Denise pleaded. “Please don’t.”

“Don’t what?” The Wolf asked, shaking his dirty hair out of his eyes.

“Don’t kill them. You said they were already dead, you said I was.” Denise argued, trying to appeal to his psychosis. “You don’t need to kill us. Just let us die. Just let us die.”

The Wolf appeared to think about it before picking up the keys and standing up, pointing his knife at Denise as he backed her up against the wall.

“You are so full of shit!” Denise spat at him as she tried to twist away from him.

The Wolf laughed in amusement. “You’re what I like about people.”

“Tara!” Rosita’s voice sounded from the stairwell door.

The Wolf quickly moved himself behind Denise and held the knife to her throat as Rosita, Tara and Eugene entered the room. They all froze when they spotted him, with Rosita and Tara aiming their guns at him while Eugene hung back with his machete.

“Just be still.” The Wolf told them calmly.

“Don’t.” Tara gasped.

“Lower the guns.” The Wolf ordered, though the two women refused to do so. “Lower the guns.”

Rosita and Tara knew it was best to do as he said, they couldn’t afford to have anything happen to the only doctor in the community. They lowered their guns, glaring at the man.

“Good.” He continued. “Slide them over. I want them.”

Rosita and Tara slid their guns across the floor towards him while Eugene slid the machete over. The Wolf bent down and picked up Tara’s gun before standing up straight and aiming the gun at them.

“You don’t need her.” Tara attempted to plead with him.

“No. I don’t.” The Wolf retorted as he made his way forward. “Back. Back.”

The others backed up as he slid past them, holding the gun to Denise’s head as he made his way towards the front door of the holding cell.

“You’re not going to make it out there.” Tara warned him, assuming he didn’t know that the walkers had taken over the streets.

“We’ll see.” The Wolf replied with a laugh as he opened the door and backed out of it.

Rosita, Tara and Eugene watched helplessly as he backed up to the locked door and used the keys to unlock it. He opened it and guided Denise out with him, keeping his pace slow and quiet so they avoided being noticed by the walkers.

 

Jason, Michonne and Carl stood on the landing as Michonne peered down at the walkers downstairs. Most of them were simply standing still, others were shuffling around and the rest were still clawing at the sofa. The density of the herd wasn’t going to get any easier to navigate but they would at least have more space outside.

“We have to go.” Michonne whispered loudly to the others.

Rick and Gabriel came through to peer down at the walkers as well. Ron stood beside Carl, swaying on the spot nervously as his mother and younger brother came through to join them.

“We’re ready.” Jessie told them. “Ron?”

“Yeah.” Ron rasped. Their lives were in the hands of his father’s killer again.

“I’ll get Judith.” Rick told them as he headed back through.

“Rick.” Gabriel stopped him. “I’m not going to give up out there. I will not turn back, no matter what happens.”

Rick saw the conviction in Gabriel’s eyes and nodded. “Yeah, I know.”

Carl and Jason watched Rick walk down the hall to get Judith. Ron took this moment to glare at both of them before looking away again. Jason stared down at the walkers as his heart started to pound a little harder. In a few moments, they would be in the middle of the herd, in the eye of the storm with no way out. He inhaled slowly and deeply, willing himself to ignore the stench of death that was all around them.

Jason turned his head and stared softly at Carl. He couldn’t control the gentle smile that crept onto his face as he admired his boyfriend’s face. Even damp with sweat and a little pale from nausea, he was still the most attractive person he had met during the apocalypse. He was proud to call Carl his. Carl turned his head and met Jason’s gaze, staring back into his eyes with his own bright blue orbs.

Jason thought back to Kellin. His deceased soulmate would have struggled to face such a grim situation. He could imagine him even now, holding Jason’s hand tightly as he swallowed heavily, fearfully looking down at the herd. Kellin would have needed Jason by his side at all times to keep him safe and strong. It was a relief for Jason to know that Carl was different. Carl was a survivor just like everyone else in the group. Carl didn’t need the constant protection Jason felt obligated to provide. Carl was brave and could fight the dead and the living. He would survive this with Jason and the next day they’d be able to celebrate their survival and their love.

“What?” Carl asked after Jason continued to silently stare.

“I love you, Carl.” Jason replied with a wider smile. “And I promise I won’t let anything happen to you.”

“I love you too.” Carl replied, blushing because the others could hear. “And I won’t let anything happen to you either.”

The sound of footsteps on the wooden floor signalled Rick’s approach. He carried through Judith, who was blissfully unaware of the danger they were all in. Jessie lifted Carl’s poncho so that he could take hold of his little sister. Carl had put on a harness under his poncho so his hands would be free while carrying her. The quiet little bundle quickly disappeared under the gut covered poncho.

Jessie checked that her gun was loaded before pulling her own poncho back down. Rick stepped forward and led the descent down the stairs. They walked slowly and quietly as Rick pushed the sofa out of the way and slipped through into the herd. The smell was horrendous and the sight of the walkers so close was terrifying. However, none of the corpses reacted to their presence. They were perfectly camouflaged as they walked through the undead.

Rick took the lead with Carl right behind him. Jason stayed close behind Carl with Jessie, Sam, Ron, Gabriel and Michonne behind him. The front room was packed with walkers from wall to wall in a way that reminded Jason of his busiest clubbing days before the world ended. It didn’t take them long to reach the front door and walk through onto the porch as some of the walkers started making their way upstairs.

In the upstairs bedroom, Deanna lay in the bed and pressed the barrel of her revolver to the bottom of her mouth. She had reflected on her life, thought about her family and friends while reliving her most precious memories. Despite the miserable way her life had to end, it had most certainly been worth it. Her only regret was not being able to relive a single second of it. She smiled to herself, confident that the others would survive without her and that Alexandria would come back from this.

A sudden loud snarl interrupted her thoughts as she herd the walkers thunder up the staircase. Deanna grit her teeth as she used her remaining strength to lift herself out of the bed. She limped over to the door and opened it to reveal the herd of corpses stumbling down the hallway towards her. Deanna lifted her revolver and fired the first shot, striking the closest walker in the head. She smirked and fired again, killing a second walker, causing the others to trip over its body. This was her community and she would defend it to the end. She quickly fired three more consecutive shots, killing three more walkers with expert marksmanship before her revolver clicked empty.

As the rest of the herd thundered down the hallway towards her, she considered closing the door. She didn’t have long to live and they would probably break through the wooden door eventually. She had also used up all of her ammunition, so she had to wait for the fever to finally kill her. The idea of waiting patiently for death to take her made Deanna nauseous. She was stronger than that. Alexandria was her community and she would defend it to the end. As the herd closed in on her she let out one last roar of defiance before they overwhelmed her.

The others stood together on the porch, surrounded by walkers in all directions. The walkers had filled the porch, filled the house and had filled the streets. Alexandria belonged to the undead and the group were in the middle of it all. They all had sweat trickling down their faces as they struggled to contain their nerves. From where they stood, they could hear Deanna’s gunshots and final screams before the soundtrack of the dead dominated the air once again.

Gabriel observed the walkers anxiously. He rarely had to deal with walkers and up until that day he had never really fought them except for two occasions. He trusted Rick and the others, they had taught him how to fight and survive, they had taken care of him and hadn’t killed him like he once felt he deserved. He said a quiet prayer in his mind, asking God to protect him through the upcoming ordeal.

Jessie stared out nervously at the herd. She was another who had very little experience with walkers and never could have imagined doing something as daring as this. However, the fact that they were standing in the middle of a sea of hungry corpses and hadn’t been harmed proved that Rick had been telling the truth. She trusted the man she had come to love and knew she had made the right choice by entrusting her life and the lives of her children to Rick.

Michonne breathed evenly as she stood on the porch among the dead. She was no stranger to walking with walkers as her chained up pet walkers had helped camouflage her in a similar way. She could tell the guts were a much safer form of camouflage so long as they all remained as quiet as possible. They would get through this. She knew they would. They would live and continue Deanna’s legacy as a way of honouring her memory.

Jason closed his eyes as he heard the shots fired by Deanna followed by her final screams of defiance. He bid a silent farewell to her and reminded himself of the promise he had made on her death bed. He opened his eyes again and scanned the herd of ravenous cadavers. He would make sure Carl survived this, he would help retake Alexandria so they could live safely and happily. He turned his head and squeezed Carl’s hand, a silent reminder of his promise on the landing. He wouldn’t let anything happen to Carl.

Carl squeezed Jason’s hand in return and looked up at him. He swallowed thickly but felt protected with Jason and his father on either side of him. He was nervous nonetheless, he had never been in a situation where he was surrounded by walkers before and he knew there’d be no hope of survival if anything went wrong. Carl turned his head and stared up at his father for reassurance.

Rick stared back at his son with a look of determination. He was anxious but he knew they could walk through the herd. He would keep his family safe and they would work together to get the herd out of Alexandria. They would retake the community so that things could return to normal. They could survive this. They would survive this. He was going to guide them through it.

Rick took his son’s hand. Carl kept his other hand clasped tightly together with Jason’s. Jason took Jessie’s hand, who in turn took Sam’s. Ron took his brother’s hand and Gabriel’s. Finally, Michonne took Gabriel’s hand and supported them from the back. Rick took the lead and Michonne took the back, keeping everything controlled and as safe as possible. With one last nod of determination, Rick slowly stepped down off the porch and onto the street. The others followed him, making sure to never let go of each other’s hands as they entered the streets of Alexandria again.

 

The sun was low in the sky as they made their way through the herd. The streets were absolutely filled with walkers, making movement difficult as they had to be really careful so they didn’t draw attention to themselves. The stench of death never seemed to fade, their senses refusing to get used to the pungency of it. The noise was deafening. The constant chorus of rasps, groans, snarls and growls that came from the undead as they meandered in search of their next victim.

It was unnatural to them all to be so close to the walkers. The abnormal experience of walking calmly through a sea of cannibalistic corpses was felt by them all. The horror came from the realisation that all the roamers used to be people at one point. People like them. Living people with memories, thoughts, dreams and loved ones. All of that was forever gone. If souls did exist, there were none among the bodies that shambled around them.

The most striking thing apart from the fetor was the appearance of the dead. Differences in their appearances told stories of who they were and how they died. Their clothes. Some worked in offices. Others were police officers. Many had been survivors. Their injuries. Some were missing arms. Others had gaping, fatal injuries near vital areas and for many the exact cause of death wasn’t clear.

Some of the walkers still looked human, almost living while others had already began to rot into nothing. Lips missing, leaving exposed, grey teeth. Eyes or noses missing as they had been consumed or had simply fallen away over time. Hair falling out the more it got caught on sharp or rough surfaces. A few of them even showed exposed bones, highlighting the supernatural nature of the virus that created them in the first place.

Rick, Jason, Carl and Michonne kept their wits about them. They watched the walkers, looking for openings and any signs that they had been discovered. They reluctantly scanned the rotting sea for familiar faces in case some of the others hadn’t made it. Fortunately they couldn’t recognise any of the walkers. Jessie, Ron, Sam and Gabriel spent most of the time keeping their heads down in an effort to block some of the horror out.

Rick gradually realised that the walkers were absolutely everywhere. His estimation of them being able to surround the community twenty deep had been fairly accurate. There wasn’t a single square foot of land that wasn’t occupied by the walkers, leaving the group with very little chance of guiding the herd back out the gates. They would need to change their plans. Rick slowly guided the others off the street and onto a clear patch of grass close to the lake.

“Alright, new plan.” He told them, keeping his voice low. “Flares from the few guns aren’t enough. Too many walkers, too spread out.”

Michonne and Jason stayed close but had their backs turned to Rick so they could watch the herd and make sure they weren’t noticed. Carl did the same, not letting go of Jason’s hand.

“We’re not going to the armoury. We need our vehicles back at the quarry.” Rick continued. “All of us drive, we’ll need to round them up. We leave, we come back.”

“Okay.” Jessie nodded, trusting Rick implicitly. “But Judith? To the quarry and back…”

Rick hesitated. It would be a difficult trip if they were taking Judith with them, not to mention the extreme danger it would present for her.

“I’ll take her.” Gabriel offered. “Keep her safe in my church until you all lead the walkers away.”

“Can you do this?” Michonne asked, mirroring Jason’s own private concerns.

Gabriel smiled, remembering Jason’s reaction when he had led the walkers back to his church in Georgia. The young man had almost killed him for nearly getting Carl and Judith killed and his anger had been totally justified. It was time for the priest to put things right.

“I’m supposed to. I have to.” Gabriel replied, turning back to Rick. “I will.”

Rick thought for a moment before nodding. Carl stepped closer to them, turning his back to the walkers as he raised his poncho. Michonne and Jason shielded him from the herd as he passed his confused baby sister to Gabriel. Gabriel held her lovingly in his arms under his poncho to keep her quiet as they prepared to move on.

“Take Sam.” Jessie asked of him quickly. She knew how scared her son was.

“No.” Sam quickly retorted. He didn’t want to be separated from his mother.

“Yes, Sam. It’ll be safer.” Jessie told the young boy.

“I’m not leaving you.” Sam argued stubbornly.

“Sam…” Jessie sighed. This wasn’t the time for him to disobey her.

“Mum, I’m not.” Sam insisted. “I can keep going.”

“Sam.” Jessie repeated, doubting him.

“I can keep going.” Sam insisted slightly louder. “Please. Please.”

Jason took a breath as he listened to the argument. The safest place for the boy was at the church, it was close by and would be well barricaded. However, if Sam were to have a nervous breakdown or get scared, then both Gabriel and Judith could die as a result. They couldn’t handle Judith dying, it would be too great a tragedy. Perhaps Jason had been wrong about Sam. Perhaps he could survive.

“Let’s just go.” Sam finished pleading his case.

Jessie sighed. “Okay.”

“I’m going to keep her safe.” Gabriel repeated to Rick. His voice steady. Confident.

“Thank you.” Rick replied. His voice unsteady. Nervous.

With that said, Gabriel walked past them and returned to the herd. He stayed on the grass and walked slowly, keeping his head down and making sure he took the shortest path to the church. He knew he could do this and he would. Jason smirked as he watched him go. Carl had been right when he stopped him from killing the priest.

“Hey, he’s gonna make it, okay?” Jessie told Rick, noticing the nervous expression on his face. “I know it.”

“She’s right.” Jason added, turning round to look at Rick. “He’s one of us now.”

Rick nodded nervously and reached his hand out. “Sam.”

Sam took Rick’s hand, creating a new order for them to walk in as they started making their way to the gates. Jessie took Sam’s hand and then Carl’s. Carl and Jason had never let go of each other’s hands so Jason reached his other hand out to Ron. The younger teen looked at Jason’s gloved hand reluctantly, not particularly wanting to hold hands with someone who had threatened him several times. Jason growled under his breath and forcefully grabbed his hand. Michonne then took Ron’s other hand and maintained her position at the back of the group as they continued on.

 

Tara looked out the cell door at all the walkers out on the street. None of them could see her so it allowed her to observe them in relative safety. She was panicking, however, as her girlfriend had just been forced out there with a murderous psychopath. She had just let it happen and it was eating her up inside.

“We have to try!” Tara argued, insisting that they go after him.

“We cannot go out there.” Rosita retorted. “There are too many of them.”

“Rosita, he’s gonna kill her!” Tara argued back desperately.

“We won’t get to her!” Rosita countered aggressively.

“She needs us!” Tara barked as she marched up to the Latino woman.

“We’ll die. That is what will happen. We have one gun and the streets are filled with those things.” Rosita explained, proving that she cared but she was still thinking clearly. “That man needs her, okay? She’s a doctor, he is sick and I think we’ve seen that he knows how to survive but we need to make sure that Carol and Morgan are okay and then we make a plan. We cannot just go.”

Tara reluctantly nodded, holding back her tears. “Okay.”

“Oh God.” Carol sighed as Eugene helped her up, quickly working out what had happened. “Rosita, I’m gonna need your gun. I’m gonna do a sweep of the brownstone, I wanna see what other surprises are in here.”

“Hey, he’s waking up.” Eugene pointed out as he crouched down next to Morgan.

Morgan patted the back of his head where the Wolf had hit him before sitting up more. He turned his body and scanned the room, quickly realising that Denise and the Wolf were missing.

“Where is he?” Morgan asked them, grimacing from the pain still throbbing through his head. “Where’s Denise?”

“He took her, didn’t he?” Carol asked rhetorically.

Rosita nodded and stood up, handing Carol her gun. The older woman took the gun and left the room, staying true to her plan of sweeping the entire building. Morgan watched her go, knowing that if anything happened to Denise it would now be entirely his fault in Carol’s mind.

“Let’s get you up.” Eugene offered and helped him to his feet.

 

Rick continued to lead them through the herd. The sun had vanished below the horizon some thirty minutes before, leaving Alexandria in darkness as they continued to walk among the dead. The walkers seemed slightly more agitated at night but that could have been a figment of their imaginations brought on by anxiety and stress. They couldn’t get used to the smell or the sound of them.

As he led the group through the walkers, Rick kept his axe in his hand. He didn’t expect anything to go wrong but he preferred to be ready just in case. Jason kept a tight hold on Ron and Carl’s hands, feeling more in control by being the dividing line between them. He hadn’t forgotten that Ron had tried to kill Carl earlier and he’d make sure that was known once the walkers were gone. Carl made sure he kept his eyes on all the walkers that got close. All it could take was a misunderstood touch to set them off. Having Michonne, his father and Jason all close by made him feel a lot safer than he would be if he was alone.

Sam had taken a quiet yet morbid fascination with the walkers. He couldn’t stop looking at their rotting faces. Missing body parts. Blood stained clothes. Torn open skin. Loose or missing eyeballs. Ripped lips exposing infected teeth and gums. Rigid, shambling gaits. Aggressive snarls of hunger. They were monsters.

_The monsters will come and you won’t be able to run away when they come for you._

Carol’s words echoed in the young boy’s mind. She had said them when he had caught her raiding the armoury for handguns. She had threatened to tie him to a tree outside should he ever tell anyone she was there.

_The ones out there. They will tear you apart and eat you up all while you’re still alive._

Sam froze when he saw it. Another walker mixed in with the crowd but this one stood out. It was a child, no older than he was. It staggered away in the opposite direction. That’s what he would look like if the monsters got him. He’d turn into one of them and he’d wander around without a soul just like the rest of them. Just like Carol had told him.

Sam let go of Rick’s hand, quickly getting his attention along with that of the others. Jason narrowed his eyes at the young boy who was frozen on the spot and cursed under his breath. He had been right all along, Sam couldn’t handle being out there in the herd. Jason instinctively let go of Ron’s hand as he rested his hand on the handle of his machete. He tried to prepare himself for what might be necessary.

“Sam?” Jessie questioned her son, trying to get him moving. “Sam, come on.”

Sam didn’t respond. He continued staring ahead at the child walker as he felt tears brimming in his eyes. His legs felt numb from fear. He wanted to be at home in his room. He didn’t want to be out there anymore.

“Come on. Sweetheart? Sam?” Jessie continued. “Sam, come on.”

“Come on, Sam.” Rick attempted. The boy had been doing really well up until this moment.

“Sam, hey, you can do this.” Ron whispered to his brother. “Sam, just look at mum.”

“Honey, you can do it.” Jessie tried to encourage him. “Sam, I need you to come with me.”

Sam cracked. He let out a whine like a terrified puppy as he tried to speak. He tried to communicate his fear to them, to point out the child walker ahead of them. To tell them about Carol’s warning but he couldn’t. His body was shutting down as fear took over and he started to shake.

“I need you to come with me.” Jessie told him. “I need you to be strong.”

“I want to…” Sam choked out in terror.

Jason saw it first. He tried to react. He tried to move. He unsheathed his machete and stepped forward but he was too late. Two walkers behind Sam had heard him and quickly sank their teeth into his right shoulder and the left side of his head. Sam wailed in agony and fear as the walkers ripped into him, blood pouring down his face and body as his knees buckled and he fell to the ground. Jason cursed under his breath and sheathed his machete. There was nothing that could be done.

An ear splitting scream sounded from Jessie as she watched her youngest son get devoured. It was a sight no mother could ever be prepared to witness nor to cope with. She screamed again as tears rolled down her eyes while Ron looked on in an almost catatonic state. He had lost his father and now his younger brother.

“Jessie!” Carl tried to get through to the woman who wouldn’t let go of her son’s hand. “Come on, come with us.”

Jason noticed the walkers were drawing closer, attracted by the feeding frenzy and Jessie’s screams.

“Jessie, I’m sorry but we need to move.” Jason hissed, constantly looking over his shoulder. “We have to go!”

It was too late. Before any of them could say another word a small group of walkers grabbed onto her and bit into her. They all went for the neck and shoulders, quickly silencing her screams as they ripped out her jugular, causing her to drown in her own blood. The walkers forced her to the ground as they started devouring her flesh.

Ron stumbled back in total shock. What little was left of his family had just died in front of him. They were all gone. He couldn’t process it right away. He couldn’t even cry. He just stood there like a statue as the walkers tore his mother and brother to shreds.

Rick shook his head in a mix of horror and disbelief. He didn’t want to believe that the woman he had fallen in love with, the woman he had risked so much to save was now gone. In a few seconds he had lost her and he had been completely powerless. Rick didn’t want to accept that he’d never get to see her face again, that he’d never feel her lips on his again, or that he’d never see her smile or hear her laugh. Everything he loved just seemed to always get taken away from him.

“Dad!” Carl called out to him, drawing the attention of more walkers.

Rick turned and saw that Carl was trying to pull himself free from Jessie’s grip. Unfortunately, upon her death her muscles had tensed to the point where she had a vice like grip on Carl’s hand. Even with Jason pulling Carl with all his strength wasn’t enough to yank him free and as the walkers devoured her the closer Carl got to joining her.

“Rick!” Jason called out as well, growling with effort as he tried to pull Carl free.

Rick looked around at the walkers as they approached his son. The walkers had taken so many loved ones away from him. As he looked down at Jessie’s half-eaten corpse he vowed to never let it happen again. The walkers wouldn’t take his son or anyone else in his family. He pulled out his axe and with a silent plea for forgiveness, he slammed it down onto Jessie’s arm. The limb didn’t sever right away, so Rick slammed the axe down again, slicing into the bone. One more hit. He said a silent goodbye to Jessie and sliced the axe through her arm, cutting it off and freeing his son.

Carl and Jason both fell back on the ground as they had been pulling so hard. Carl’s Beretta fell out of its holster and landed on the grass behind them. Rick kept his axe at the ready as he scanned the sea of corpses along with Michonne. None of them appeared interested anymore except for those taking part in the two feeding frenzies. They were safe for now. Carl and Jason quickly got back up but were confused to see Rick staring behind them with narrow eyes.

The click of a gun safety was enough to make both teens spin around on the spot. Carl’s eyes widened in shock when he saw that his Beretta was now in Ron’s hands and was being aimed directly at Rick. Ron’s eyes were cold. The mixture of stress and shock was too much and he was in an even worse state than he had been in the garage. Jason quickly pulled out his Operator and aimed it at Ron’s head.

“You…” Ron gasped out, glaring at Rick.

Rick was the man who had killed his father. Rick was the man who had led his family out into the herd to die. Rick was the man who had killed his entire family, just like he knew he would. Rick was going to die for what he had done. Then Carl would die for taking Enid from him. Then Jason would die as well. They would all die.

“Put it down or I’ll kill you.” Jason hissed. “I don’t care if every walker hears it.”

“You.” Ron wasn’t listening. He didn’t care. He squeezed the trigger.

Jason was about to shoot him when suddenly Michonne’s sword erupted out of Ron’s chest. She knew he was going to pull the trigger and couldn’t let it happen. Ron’s eyes widened as his arms and legs splayed apart. His finger pulled the trigger and fired the gun but the bullet missed its target. Jason holstered his gun as Ron’s body fell to the ground. Rick nodded to Michonne in gratitude as they all let out a sigh of relief. It was over. They were okay.

Jason turned to check on Carl and make sure he was okay after seeing his friend die in front of him. He froze when he saw blood trickling down Carl’s cheek from under his hat. Rick noticed Jason’s horrified expression and turned to look at his son. He too saw the blood running down Carl’s cheek as the teen lifted his head and looked at his father. More blood poured from the hole where his right eye used to be. The bullet had struck his eye socket.

“Dad?” Carl gasped out weakly before collapsing on the ground.

“Carl!” Rick choked out. He couldn’t lose his son.

Jason stared down at Carl’s lifeless form. Blood had covered his cheek as it ran down his face and continued to pour from his eye socket. The wound itself was horrific. His eye was gone, blood was everywhere and there were sharp bone fragments sticking out of it. As Jason stared at the wound and Carl’s motionless body he felt a cold shiver go through his whole body. His legs shook as his knees threatened to buckle and his face went white as a sheet. Jason grimaced as he swallowed down the bile rising in his throat. His chest felt tight, as if he suddenly couldn’t breathe.

_Jason squeezed his hand tighter. “Nothing will happen.”_

_“How can you be so sure?” Kellin asked fearfully._

_Jason kissed him softly. “Because I’ll always protect you and keep us safe. I promise.”_

Jason let out a shuddering breath as the memories came flooding back to him. He had promised Kellin the same way he had promised Carl.

_“What?” Carl asked after Jason continued to silently stare._

_“I love you, Carl.” Jason replied with a wider smile. “And I promise I won’t let anything happen to you.”_

Kellin was gone now. The worst night of his life came back to him in violent flashes. The rain. The thunder. The dark, cold room where they sat together. Kellin’s bite and his dying wishes.

_“I love you. I love you so much and I always will.” Jason told him, squeezing his hand as his tears continued to fall._

_“I love you too. Always.” Kellin replied weakly. He smiled. That same smile Jason had fallen in love with the first time they met._

_Kellin’s breathing stopped and his grip on Jason finally loosened. He was gone. Just like that, the most important person in Jason’s life, the only reason he had made it this far, was gone. The last person in the world that he was prepared to lose now lay dead in his arms. Jason wailed with grief, his tears falling on Kellin’s lifeless face._

Despite all his promises and best efforts, he had failed. Jason had vowed to never let what happened to Kellin happen to Carl. He had known all the way back when they met that he wouldn’t be able to handle losing someone so close to him again. Jason had insisted that Carl learn to fight, to wield different weapons and think like a survivor. In the end, Ron, the snivelling little bully that Jason had wanted to kill had been the one to destroy his life. In one final act of accidental cruelty, Ron had taken Carl away from him. In a fraction of a second Jason’s world had come crashing down around him.

An inhuman bellow of horror erupted from Jason. It echoed around them as his heart broke into a million pieces, each shard stabbing and cutting his insides. He looked around as the walkers approached him. They were to blame for it. The walkers had taken everyone away from him in some form or another and this had been the last straw. Jason unsheathed his machete and sliced into the head of the nearest walker with a roar of rage. Another walker tried to grab him and received the large blade to the face as a result.

Rick noticed that there was no blood under Carl’s head. The bullet hadn’t gone through his head so there was still a chance he could be saved. He rushed forward and picked his lifeless son up in his arms. Michonne started running in front of him, using her sword to kill any walkers that got in their way as they ran for the infirmary. They had to get Carl to Denise as fast as possible and they wouldn’t let the herd get in their way.

Jason slammed his machete down into the skull of another walker as he kicked another one away, the corpse falling back against its companions. He ripped the machete out of the walker’s skull and spun round to decapitate another one. Any that got too close he quickly kicked them hard enough to knock them on their backs. They wouldn’t take him. He wouldn’t let them. Jason quickly bent down and picked up Carl’s gun and fired it to stop one of the walkers from grabbing him.

Jason threw off his poncho and draped it over the heads of a couple walkers, blinding them and preventing them from biting him as he slashed another in the head. He fired three more quick shots from the Beretta, killing each walker with a perfect headshot. He moved forward, knocking a couple walkers off their feet before shooting another two of them and slashing another with his machete.

When Rick heard the gunshots he looked back in time to see a walker on either side of Jason bite his arms. He cursed and yet again silently asked for forgiveness as he turned around and continued running with Michonne. They couldn’t save both Carl and Jason so they had to choose one. Carl was the most important person in Rick’s life and he was determined to get him to the infirmary and save his life. He wouldn’t let him die.

Jason roared wildly, stumbling as the walkers bit into the sleeves of his leather jacket. Their teeth squeaked loudly against the material as Jason tried to quickly shake them off. When he couldn’t shake them loose, he spun himself around quickly, knocking the walkers off balance and using them to knock the herd back a couple steps. When one of the walkers finally let go, he used Carl’s gun to shoot the other one off him. Jason hacked at the head of the nearest walker and knocked its corpse back as he ran forward. He had to keep moving.

Jason ran through the herd, trying to keep himself to the widest areas as he continued firing Carl’s gun. Each shot he fired struck a walker in the head and ended its existence. Any other walkers that got too close were sliced and slashed with the long blade of his machete. He couldn’t feel the movements he was making, it was like he was running on auto-pilot. His body moved for him as he continued to kill the walkers without stopping for a moment. Jason knew if he stopped he would die. He wasn’t ready to die yet. He had to take vengeance against the apocalyptic world of the undead.

 

Tara looked out the cell door at the walkers in the street. They all appeared to be getting drawn to the gunfire. She shuddered to think who was stupid enough to be firing a gun in the middle of a herd that size. She knew whoever it was had very little chance of surviving. They were just sounded the dinner bell with each pull of the trigger.

Morgan, Rosita, Eugene and Carol had all heard the shots as well. Whoever it was had clearly been putting up one hell of a fight before their gun ran empty, or the more likely and far more grim possibility, they had been overwhelmed by the walkers. There was no leading them away. They were too spread out. A plan of action would need to be put into place to distract the walkers or to kill them, though the chances of such a plan working without fatalities seemed very slim.

“Sooner or later we’re fighting our way out, just like whoever that was.” Eugene commented to Rosita. “I know that you’re fully aware that we will.”

“Yeah, we will. Not you.” Rosita spat back as she also wondered who had just gone down fighting.

“Well, by my reckoning…” Eugene started to put up an argument but was cut off.

“Eugene, come on.” Rosita retorted before walking away from him, leaving him to stare at the blade of his machete.

Upstairs, Carol had finished checking the building and had made sure they were safe and secure inside. She headed over to one of the windows with the hopes of catching a glimpse of who had been fighting the walkers. She sighed as she stared out at a crowded but otherwise calm street.

Carol sat down and rested her forehead against her hand. Perhaps the gunshots had been someone she cared about making a final stand before death. Perhaps the gunshots had been the Wolf and Denise before the herd overtook them. At the thought of that possibility, Carol felt the guilt inside her squeeze around her heart. If she had just killed Morgan then she would have been able to kill the Wolf and save Denise.

Approaching footsteps startled her and caused her to stand up and aim the gun at the doorway. Standing there, stick in hand, was Morgan. The man she had failed to kill. The man who wouldn’t kill, not even the worst people. She inhaled a shaky breath before lowering the gun and turning back to look out the window.

“You had a child, right? A husband?” Morgan asked, finally working out why Carol carried so much conviction with each action. “I didn’t want to hurt you, I just had to stop you.”

“You saved him for you, not us. If it was for us you would’ve…” Carol trailed off, the wounds of her past still stinging her along with her guilt. “I should’ve killed you. I should’ve.”

“You can’t.” Morgan retorted after a few moments.

Carol felt herself shake. He was right. Despite everything she had done, everything that had been necessary, she knew she couldn’t kill him. All the lives that she had taken had been dangerous people in some form. Morgan wasn’t dangerous or evil. He was just misguided and stubborn. Attributes he would no doubt apply to Carol as well. 

The sound of a metal shutter opening snapped her out of her thoughts. She grabbed her gun and rushed out onto the terrace to see what was going on. To her surprise, Carol spotted the Wolf pushing walkers out of the way to clear a path while Denise followed behind.

The Wolf turned and called out to Denise. “Come on!”

Carol took her shot and fired twice, both bullets striking him in the chest. Denise looked up with a shocked expression when she found Carol with her gun in her hands.

“Go!” Carol shouted. They weren’t far from the infirmary. “Go!”

“Go!” The Wolf echoed as he grabbed a walker and pulled it down with him.

Denise ran past him as the walkers tore into his bleeding chest while Carol looked on from her spot on the terrace. She couldn’t shake the feeling that something didn’t feel right about what had just happened.

 

Jason shoulder barged a walker out of the way before side stepping another. He slashed the next walker in the temple with his machete before kicking it away. Another closed in on him but he grabbed it by the throat and decapitated three others that closed in on him, growling loudly at the hungry corpses. He continued to push through the herd, using the one at the end of his arm as a shield to help control them a little better.

Jason slammed the machete into that walker’s skull before kicking the knee of another walker. He chopped off its head with a powerful vertical strike and ducked under the next two walkers so he could get some space. Once he was past them he turned back around and beheaded both of them before making his way towards the van that Eugene had used to save Glenn weeks before.

He slashed and hacked at any walkers that got too close to him as he ran for the vehicle. He needed to create space and put a dent in the herd at the same time. If he stayed on the ground slashing too long he knew he would get overwhelmed and killed. Jason scrambled up on the bonnet and climbed onto the roof. He looked down at all the rotting faces as he sheathed his machete and grabbed the grips of his AKMSU with both hands. He had close to eighty rounds in his assault rifle and he was going to use them all wisely. Jason had to kill the walkers quickly so they didn’t knock him off the van by rocking it too much.

He opened fire on the corpses, making sure each bullet hit a walker in the head. He refused to waste a single bullet. He refused to leave a single walker alive. His failure to act had caused the death of Kellin and now he had lost Carl as well. Jason bellowed furiously at the walkers to get their attention as he kept shooting them, disgusted at the sight of their decaying faces.

 

Aaron opened the door to the infirmary as Denise rushed in. He quickly slammed it behind him and hoped that none of the walkers had noticed. They had been lucky so far as none of the walkers had even paid them any attention for the last couple hours.

“You okay?” Spencer asked her quickly.

“I’m fine.” Denise answered, out of breath from all the running. “How are my patients?”

“They’re doing well, we moved them upstairs just in case.” Heath explained, earning a sigh of relief from Denise.

“Oh my God…” Aaron gasped as he looked out the window.

Outside, running across the grass and heading for the infirmary were Michonne and Rick. Michonne was easily recognisable as she sliced through walkers with her sword while Rick followed her carrying Carl in his arms. They were running as fast as they could throw the maze of undead cannibals.

“It’s the kid.” Heath pointed out. “Is he bit?”

“No.” Denise declared. She remembered hearing screams and gunshots. “I need bandages, top shelf next to the sink, two IVs from the fridge and all the clean towels you can find. Aaron, grab the gurney.”

Everyone did as they were told. Aaron wheeled the gurney into the centre of the room, Spencer grabbed the bandages and Heath grabbed the IVs while Denise rushed over and opened the door just as Rick came thundering in, Michonne hot on his heels. Rick quickly carried Carl over to the gurney and placed him on it.

“Is this a gunshot wound?” Denise asked, needing details immediately.

“Handgun, close range.” Michonne answered as she slammed the door shut behind her.

Rick looked down at his son’s lifeless form. It was the first time he had got a proper look at the horrendous injury he had sustained. His right eye had been completely obliterated by the bullet along with parts of the eye socket, causing bone fragments so stick out and run red with blood.

“Please save him.” Rick croaked out as his whole body shook. “Please.”

Denise started working on him immediately, turning on the light so she could get a better look at the injury and work out what to do.

“That’s gonna draw them here!” Spencer hissed at her.

“I need the light!” Denise retorted as she tried to stop the bleeding.

“Where’s Jason?” Aaron asked Michonne as he prepared to help Denise.

Michonne tilted her head to the gunfire. “He’s still out there.”

“Jesus…” Aaron muttered before being called over by a desperate Denise.

Michonne helped Rick, who appeared to be in shock, by removing his disgusting poncho after removing her own. Rick pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger as damp locks of hair stuck to his face. He had just witnessed his girlfriend and her family die in a matter of minutes and had almost lost his son right after that. He got over Lori’s death but he knew he’d never get over Carl’s.

Rick watched as they went to work. All of them but him. He had led Carl and the others out into the herd. It had been his idea so he was responsible. He shook with shock and could barely understand a word of what Denise was saying as she barked orders to the others. Rick peered out the window from behind the blinds and saw the walkers advancing towards the infirmary.

Then he heard it. The sound of gunfire. The shots were spread out. Precise. They weren’t panicked but instead were being aimed well. Rick realised it was Jason firing the shots and when he squinted he could see gunfire in the distance. Jason was alive and was fighting the herd. Rick glanced back at his comatose son. He had been forced to abandon Jason in order to save his son and had succeeded. He knew that when Carl woke up he’d want to see Jason. Rick owed it to Carl to go out and save him too.

The walkers were closing in on the infirmary, drawn by the light enough to make them ignore the distant gunfire. If the walkers broke into the infirmary then Carl would die. He couldn’t let that happen. He couldn’t let Carl die and he couldn’t let Jason die. Too many people had died on his watch and many of them to the undead freaks that littered the streets outside. It was time to make amends and to stop anyone else from dying. Rick pulled out his axe and opened the infirmary door.

“Rick, what are you doing?” Michonne called in horror. “Rick?”

Rick didn’t answer her. His mind was focused on one thing. Killing every last walker in Alexandria. He was going to finish what Jason had already started.

“Rick!” Michonne yelled as the door closed behind the former sheriff.

 

Rick marched along the porch towards the herd. The walkers snarled loudly as they spotted him and gravitated towards him. With a roar of effort, Rick slammed the axe into the head of the closest walker before kicking it away. He quickly turned and slashed a walker to his right followed by one on his left. The next one he rolled over his body so it fell to the ground before receiving the axe blade to the head.

Rick slashed another walker with the axe before grabbing one by the throat and pushing it back. As he pushed it back he killed two more walkers before slicing the skull of the walker he was holding onto. Rick continued swinging at the walkers as they closed in around him. He had to defend the infirmary and draw some of them away from Jason who he could still hear shooting. Rick was hacking through the walkers at a rapid pace, something that he couldn’t keep up forever.

Inside the infirmary, Michonne was holding Carl steady while Denise worked on his wound. The doctor had been cursing the horrendous injury as it refused to stop bleeding which forced her to take much longer. She was slowly working on some temporary stitches that would give her more room to work and more time to work with.

“Rick’s out there!” Michonne told her in a blind panic.

“Hold on.” Denise told her calmly.

“He needs my help!” Michonne argued.

“Just one more suture.” Denise told her as she continued to work on Carl’s eye.

“He’s out there!” Michonne cried desperately.

“This is his son.” Denise responded, glaring at her. “Give me a second.”

“He’s taking them all on just like Jason.” Aaron commented as he watched from the window. “We have to go get them.”

“What?” Spencer questioned, incredulous.

“We have to.” Heath replied. It wasn’t right for them to stay hidden inside. “This is it.”

Denise finally finished the sutures. “Okay, got it.”

Michonne quickly kissed Carl’s forehead before grabbing her sword and rushing out the infirmary with Aaron, Heath and Spencer. They all slashed and stabbed their way through the walkers as they rushed towards Rick. He was easy to spot, standing in the middle of a large circle of undead freaks. He was about to be overwhelmed.

Rick growled angrily as he pushed a walker back and slashed at another. He was getting tired and wasn’t killing them fast enough. The walkers had boxed him in so all he was doing was delaying the inevitable. He jumped when the head of a walker behind him split apart as Michonne burst through the rotting crowd to help him. Rick nodded in silent thanks as he noticed Aaron, Heath and Spencer also killing walkers.

The five of them quickly formed a circle formation with their backs to each other. This way they could all fight the walkers and only have to worry about the corpses in front of them. There was no fear of being attacked from behind anymore, allowing them to focus and be more precise with their attacks. If the walkers got too close then they simply pushed them back as they killed them. They could all still hear the gunfire from the other side of the community.

“We have to get to Jason!” Rick shouted to them. “We fight our way through!”

Despite their formation and determination, there were still far too many walkers for just five people to fight off. They were doing very well, killing a walker every ten seconds or so but they didn’t have enough people to keep all the walkers at bay. It was only a matter of time before someone got bit.

“Knock them away!” Rick commanded. “Drive them down!”

The sound of a door slamming shut was heard close by and Rick spared a moment to look over in the direction of the sound. Rushing down the street, stabbing and slashing walkers, were Olivia, Bruce and Eric. They quickly joined the formation changing it to an eight person formation. This strengthened their defence considerably and gave the walkers very few gaps to squeeze through. There was a chance.

“We can beat them!” Rick bellowed confidently. “We can beat them!”

The group of eight continued down the street. They kept themselves moving as Rick guided them towards Jason. The gunfire wouldn’t last forever as Jason would inevitably run out of ammo and Rick was determined to get to him before that. He owed a lot to his son’s boyfriend and the least he could do was help to keep him alive. They would get to him and they would kill all the walkers in Alexandria. They would take their community back.

 

Jason continued shooting the walkers that grouped up around the van. He had to shoot faster because the herd kept coming and some of them were rocking the van back and forth making it difficult for him to keep his balance. A carpet of dead bodies surrounded the van courtesy of his previous gunshots. Jason roared at the walkers as he fired ten final shots before his AKMSU clicked empty. He cursed and let it drop to his side before pulling out his TRP Operator handgun.

Jason held the pistol with both hands as he shot at the closest walkers, making sure each time that he shot them in the head. Regardless of how many walkers he killed they just kept coming, some of them tripping over the bodies of their deceased companions. Jason’s handgun clicked empty after he had killed ten walkers, forcing him to eject the magazine and toss it to the ground before slamming in a new one. He was going to have to move.

Jason moved to the front of the van and quickly shot the ten closest walkers one after another, their brains splattering onto the concrete as they dropped dead once again. Jason holstered his gun and slid down the windshield of the van until his feet hit the ground. Once there, he reached into his inside jacket pocket and pulled out his second handgun, the Taurus PT909 he kept for insurance.

Jason held the pistol in his left hand and quickly started firing shots at the advancing walkers. With each shot fired he would rush forward, slashing any other walkers with his machete using his right hand. All the gunfire had attracted a large portion of the herd to his location which was making movement much harder than before. He growled and grunted with effort as he sliced their skulls apart and blew their brains out as he kept moving.

An object on the ground caught his eye. He fired at four more walkers while slashing at another eight as he ran. The walkers continued to snarl and growl hungrily as they continued to advance towards him, their teeth clicking together with desperate bites. Jason ducked under the arms of a walker to pick the object up off the ground before kicking another walker in the knee cap. Once it was down he chopped off its head before spinning round and shooting two more walkers that had got too close for comfort.

Jason sheathed his machete quickly and backed up onto the grass where there were less walkers. The area he was in seemed to have mostly dead bodies which meant the herd was dispersing in another direction. He could have swore he heard distant shouting, like the barking of orders. Perhaps he wasn’t the only one putting up a fight. Jason fired the remaining six rounds from his Taurus before it clicked empty as well.

Jason returned the gun to his inside pocket and took the brief moment he had to grab the object with two hands. The object was Carl’s sheriff hat. It had fallen off his head when he had collapsed and had been left behind by Rick and Michonne. Jason swallowed thickly and glared hatefully at the incoming walkers as he placed the hat on his own head. He would wear it in Carl’s honour as he killed all the walkers that he could.

“Kill me if you can!” Jason hollered at the herd as he unsheathed his machete and his knife.

The walkers snarled as if they were galvanised by Jason’s challenge and advanced towards him. The walker right in front of him had its skull split in two by a vertical strike from the machete while the walker to Jason’s left had its temple stabbed with his knife. Jason pulled both blades out quickly and beheaded two more walkers with his machete before stabbing another in the forehead with his knife. Jason was far from finished.

 

“That’s it!” Rick barked at the group. “We do this together!”

Gabriel stood inside the church and watched the group fighting the herd outside. He bounced baby Judith in his arms as he looked at his congregation and the other residents who had managed to make it to the church. They were all just sitting inside, waiting for the walkers to disappear while Rick and the others were outside risking their lives.

Gabriel shivered as he remembered the screams of his previous congregation. How they had come to him for sanctuary after Atlanta had been bombed only to find themselves locked out by the man who had married them and baptised their children. He remembered how they had screamed and wailed in fear and pain when the dead attacked them. He had sat inside his church and listened as entire families were torn apart.

To their credit, Rick’s group had accepted him and taken care of him despite what he did. Even after all the horrible things he had said to them they kept him around. They kept him safe and refused to kill him even though he had given them every reason to. He wasn’t going to stand by and watch as they suffered the same fate as his old flock.

Gabriel walked up to Anna. “Can you take her?”

Anna nodded with a gentle smile as Gabriel passed Judith to her. “Of course.”

He smiled back before heading towards the front of the church, grabbing his machete off one of the chairs as he made his way to the front door. Tobin watched him in disbelief.

“Gabriel.” Tobin took a step towards him. “What are you doing?”

“We’ve been praying together. Praying that God will save our town.” Gabriel explained to them, smiling confidently. “Our prayers have been answered. God will save Alexandria because God has given us the courage to save it ourselves.”

 

Tara entered the main room after having watched the herd from the front door.

“Guys, it’s thinning out there in front.” She told them.

“We need to get out there.” Carol told them. “Rick’s making a stand.”

“How’s that?” Eugene questioned, surprised at how anyone could stand up to the herd.

“He’s out there fighting them with Michonne and some others.” Carol answered. “It’s time. Up the alley, I’m going.”

Carol handed Rosita her gun back before turning to Tara.

“Denise is safe.” She informed the younger woman.

“Did you see her?” Tara questioned, relief washing over her.

“Yeah, she made it to the infirmary.” Carol replied, glaring at Morgan. “I’m gonna go help Rick.”

“I’m going too.” Morgan declared, gripping his stick.

“I’m with you.” Rosita stated, following Carol out.

“Alright, me too.” Tara breathed out as she prepared herself to fight the herd.

“Right behind you.” Eugene added.

“Eugene, you don’t have to!” Rosita exclaimed, spinning round to face her usually cowardly friend.

“That’s incorrect, I do. No one gets to clock out today.” Eugene answered with conviction. “And Hell, this is a story people are gonna tell.”

 

The walker herd continued to march down the streets towards the commotion caused by Rick and the others. They continued hacking, stabbing and slicing at the undead army that surrounded them, leaving dead bodies littering the streets. Rick cursed under his breath as he realised they had lost track of Jason. Without the gunfire it was almost impossible to find him. Rick could only hope that the young man was still alive.

Rosita, Carol, Tara, Morgan and Eugene emerged from the alleyway to join the others. They dashed in between the remaining walkers, stabbing those that got too close to them as they made their way towards the group. Morgan quickly knocked a walker to the ground with his stick but froze when he saw its face. It was the Wolf he had kept in the cell.

“I’m sorry.” He muttered to the rasping, snarling walker before he killed it.

He quickly followed the others and joined the group. The group was turning into a powerful force of defiance against the herd. Rick continued to guide the group as he hacked at the walkers with his axe. Michonne sliced them into bits with her sword. Aaron, Heath and Eric stabbed them with their knives. Spencer crushed their skulls with the butt of his gun. Olivia, Kent, Bruce, Francine and Gabriel hacked at the walkers with their machetes. Tobin and Barbara were also present as they sliced and stabbed the starving corpses.

With the addition of Carol, Rosita, Tara, Morgan and Eugene to the already powerful group of survivors, the circular formation was proving to work perfectly. No matter how many walkers came at them the stumbling cadavers were pushed back and killed by the eighteen strong defensive formation. There was no chance for any walkers to slip past them and they were making progress against the herd. If they could keep it up they would have Alexandria back.

 

Jason growled and roared as he continued to cut his way through the walker herd. He stabbed a walker in the eye, whipped the knife out and stabbed another in the eye before beheading two more walkers with his machete. His arms burned with exertion as sweat poured down his face from under Carl’s hat. He roared at the walkers as he kicked and pushed them back when they got too close before launching his counter attack with his bladed weapons.

Blood splattered over his chest and face as he ripped the blades out of the softening skulls of the infected. Tears brimmed in his eyes and fell down his face, blurring his vision as he continued fighting the herd with the same aggression as before. Jason cried out in a mix of rage and grief with every powerful strike he delivered to the undead. They had taken so many people from him and he couldn’t handle it anymore.

Jason bellowed as he beheaded a walker and stabbed its companion in the forehead. After Kellin had died from a bite he had been completely alone and lost. Walkers had taken his parents from him, had taken his best friends from him and had destroyed the camp he stayed in before. After he had been stabbed out on the road and nursed back to health in a hospital by some of the kindest people he had met, they too had been wiped out by the undead.

Jason had vowed to stay alone. He had decided to survive for as long as he could until something or someone finally killed him. He had always assumed it would be one of the ravenous undead that would finish him off, just like they had done to everyone else in his life. What Jason hadn’t been expecting was meeting a whole new group of survivors and one special survivor in particular.

He would be lying if he said he didn’t instantly take a liking to Carl, though that initial interest was not romantic in nature. It didn’t take him long to start falling in love with the younger teen because of his kind nature, his optimism and his incredible inner strength. Jason felt he could relate to Carl and be understood by the boy. It had taken him by complete surprise when he discovered that the attraction went both ways.

If Jason were to die tonight, to be overwhelmed and consumed by the herd he was continuing to fight against, he could die content. Although he was determined to kill every walker in Alexandria for what they had done and the pain they had caused, he was at peace with life. The last couple months with Carl had been the happiest they could have been, especially the last few weeks in Alexandria. They had been given the opportunity to be a proper couple and behave like they would have done before the world ended.

Jason would forever be grateful to Deanna and her people for making that possible, along with Rick for allowing the relationship to blossom. He had never expected to be happy during the apocalypse but they had all made that possible, especially Carl. Carl was the best thing to have ever happened to him since the world ended and Jason wasn’t ready to face the world without him. He would pay everyone back by destroying the herd and then he could finally rest. He refused to be without Carl.

The walkers around him continued to snarl loudly as they tried to grab and bite him. Jason grimaced as more blood splashed across his face as he continued hacking them to pieces and stabbing their brains out. Jason kept moving forward, killing every walker that crossed his path while an increasing number of the hungry corpses slowly followed him wherever he went. He would kill them all soon enough.

 

Maggie grit her teeth as she held onto the wooden panels of the guard post she was trapped on. There was a group of at least fifty walkers below her and they kept slamming against the support beams, causing the wooden platform to sway back and forth. Every loud creak made her heart stop for a moment as she expected each one to be followed by a loud crack. It was only a matter of time before the whole thing came crashing down on top of the walkers.

“Hey!” A voice suddenly yelled from the street level.

Maggie peered down as she heard four gunshots and discovered her husband, Glenn, standing among the walkers firing his gun at them to get their attention.

“Over here!” Glenn yelled at the walkers as he continued firing his gun at them, killing any that got too close. “Come on! Here!”

“Glenn!” Maggie shouted, relieved to see her husband alive but all to conscience of the incredible danger he was in. “Glenn!”

“Over here, come on!” Glenn shouted, trying to get the attention of more walkers as he fired shots and punched a walker to the ground.

“Maggie!” Another voice called.

Maggie turned to her right to find Enid climbing up the support beams and onto the dividing column between the wall and the guard post. She carried a long line of fabric with her that could be used to help her climb down the other side of the wall.

“Enid?” Maggie called back in disbelief.

Glenn continued shouting at the walkers below, dashing in between them and shooting any that were too close. He was trying his best to be as loud as possible but the majority of the walkers at the guard post were ignoring him.

Enid walked along the dividing beam as fast as she could being very careful not to fall. If she fell from there she would be killed by the walkers below. Maggie reached out a hand and helped Enid onto the guard post once she was close enough before turning back to watch her husband fight the herd that was closing in around him.

“Just go!” Glenn hollered to them. “Just get over!”

“No!” Maggie shouted back and pulled out her revolver.

Glenn had backed himself against the wall with walkers approaching him from all other directions. He shot the ones that were closing in faster than the rest but he was fighting a losing battle. Maggie fired her revolver and killed one of the walkers but when she pulled the trigger again her gun clicked empty. She cursed as she was forced to watch her husband with no way of helping him.

Glenn shot a walker and shoved another back. He pushed a third walker away before shooting it and then shoved a couple others back. They were rapidly closing in around him and he had nowhere to go. All he could do was keep pushing them back and shooting them in the head as quickly as possible. He knew Maggie had a chance to escape and that was all that mattered to him.

“No! Glenn!” Maggie cried as she banged her revolver against the wood to attract the walkers. “Over here!”

The walkers ignored her. They continued to rapidly advance on Glenn, completely boxing him in and making escape impossible. Glenn pushed another back and shot it before doing the same to another. The next walker he pushed survived when his gun clicked empty, forcing him to pistol whip it instead. He grunted as he pushed them back and pistol whipped the incoming walkers. He could hear Maggie crying his name as the herd overwhelmed him completely.

Suddenly, a loud barrage of gunfire sounded from the top of the front gate. All the walkers around Glenn collapsed to the ground as their skulls exploded under the onslaught of bullets. Glenn covered his head with his arms and slid down the wall into a crouched position to avoid getting hit by any of the stray bullets. He looked up, as did Maggie and Enid, to find Abraham and Sasha standing on top of something behind the gate.

“Can you get the gate? Appreciate it, pal!” Abraham shouted and laughed as he opened fire on the walkers yet again.

Glenn quickly rushed over to the main gate while Abraham and Sasha covered him with their gunfire. He unlocked it and pulled open the large metal gate with a grunt of effort to reveal a fuel truck with Daryl at the wheel. Daryl slowly pulled in so that Abraham and Sasha could help Maggie and Enid off the guard post. Glenn rushed round and got into the cabin of the truck with Daryl.

“What the hell happened?” Daryl asked, shocked to see the place overrun with walkers.

“I don’t know, I just got back.” Glenn answered, panting. “Listen, we can lead some of them away but they’re scattered.”

“Naw, we’ll get them all together.” Daryl replied, already working out a plan. “Won’t have to lead them away.”

Daryl banged his fist against the roof to signal to the others that he was moving before driving off. He drove through the streets towards the lake, knocking over walkers on his way before reaching the lake in the centre of Alexandria. He reverse the truck towards it before pulling the handbrake and getting out.

Glenn, Maggie and Sasha rushed out and started stabbing walkers in the head to defend the truck while Daryl went round the back. He grabbed the fuel line and opened it so it could start pouring out of the tank and into the lake itself. His plan was to set the lake on fire and all the fuel from the truck would help to accomplish that.

 

Jason continued marching forward through the herd, a sizable portion of it following behind him the entire time. He slashed the heads apart of walkers with his machete in his right hand while stabbing walkers in the head with his knife in his left hand. His limbs burned from the constant fighting but he couldn’t stop. There were still more walkers that needed to die. Jason’s clothes were damp with blood and his hair was soaked with sweat, the dampness keeping Carl’s hat firmly locked on his head despite all his rapid movements.

Jason cursed as he roared and growled at the walkers while he cut into them with his machete and knife. His night was supposed to have been spent with Carl. He had planned the whole thing out, they would have dinner on the roof together to reminisce on how they met. He then planned to make love again. The following day was going to be a day dedicated to just the two of them, he didn’t care what anyone said. It had to be just them.

Jason snarled as he beheaded another walker, more blood splashing over his face. He didn’t care how he looked. He didn’t care that his clothes were red with walker blood. All he could think about was how things were supposed to have been. He was supposed to have discussed his future plans with Carl, about what they were going to be for each other. Jason had been thinking about Glenn’s comments about marriage since the day before and they had been starting to make sense to him.

Jason wanted them to be something more than just boyfriends. In the regular world, two months was hardly any time at all and was far too soon to be thinking about anything permanent. This wasn’t the regular world anymore, this was a world where anyone you cared about could die at a moment’s notice. Too many times he had spoken to someone in the morning only for them to be dead by the afternoon. He didn’t really care if Rick approved or not. He wanted to recognise how special his relationship with Carl was.

Jason felt the tears mix with the blood on his face as his chest tightened. None of that was going to happen anymore. Carl was dead, killed by a combination of Ron’s cruelty and Jason’s lack of preventive action. Jason would never be able to express how much he’d be willing to give for a second chance. It was the only thing he wanted. More time with Carl. The one thing he could no longer have. Jason bellowed angrily as he slammed his machete into yet another walker, the group behind him growing in number.

 

Rick’s line of defence were being pushed back. They had reached the other side of the community where Jason had originally gone to, evident by the number of corpses littering the street. Unfortunately he was long gone, leaving Rick to worry that he had been overwhelmed somewhere else and was already dead. All he could do was focus on managing the group and he would focus on finding Jason later.

The vast majority of walkers were coming from only one direction, straight ahead. This allowed the group to focus their assault better as everyone was participating. They slowly backed up until they created a half circle against the wall behind them. This was their last line of defence. This was their final stand against the advancing herd. Bodies littered the ground with many of the walkers tripping over them before being executed by the variety of weapons the group were wielding.

“Back up!” Rick bellowed to them.

They had to back up a bit more and let the walkers that were filtering out of the street spread out. Their assault would be much more effective if the walkers started spreading out in even directions instead of coming at them as one large mass of rotting flesh. Rick knew they were all tired, everyone was struggling to keep up the defence but they ultimately had no choice. This was a battle that would go down to the last man standing if it had to.

 

Jason beheaded a walker before dashing across the street. He ducked and dodged the walkers that reached out with cold arms in a desperate attempt to grab hold of him. On the other side of the street, he stabbed a walker in the eye before rushing down the flight of outdoor steps. He had made it to the armoury and the sizable portion of the herd that had been following him was about to catch up to him.

Jason knew he had to bide himself time to reload his weapons so he quickly knocked the door open and rushed inside. He grabbed the first gun he laid eyes on, Rick’s Norinco Type 56 rifle he stole from Terminus. He checked that it was loaded before rushing back out of the armoury and practically jumping up the stairs to get back onto the street level.

The herd that was following him had grown in size and made it impossible to escape anywhere but back down the stairs. There was at least a hundred walkers closing in on him leaving him no other option but to raise the assault rifle and open fire wildly. Jason screamed angrily as he waved his aim back and forth between his left and right side, keeping it aimed at head height as he continued to squeeze the trigger. The rifle bucked strongly with recoil as Jason wasn’t familiar with the weapon and his arms were tired from all the exertion.

Blood, brain matter and skull fragments flew into the air as the wild barrage of bullets tore through the herd. Some bullets shot through more than one walker due to how clumped together the approaching herd was. The walkers at the back tripped over the bodies of those that had already been killed before also being shot in the head with the assault rifle. When the weapon stopped firing due to lack of ammunition, Jason used it to crush the skull of the closest walker before rushing back down the stairs and into the armoury once again.

Jason threw the rifle down on the floor and grabbed a magazine for his AKMSU, ejecting the old one before slamming the new one in and pulling back the bolt. He let it hang by his side as he grabbed extra magazines for his two handguns as well. Jason breathed a sigh of relief as he finally reloaded all his weapons but his relief was cut short when a pair of stiff, cold hands grabbed his shoulders. Jason cursed and lurched his head forward, hoping he could keep his neck and the back of his head away from the incoming set of rotting teeth.

The walker behind him snarled hungrily as it tried to sink its teeth into his flesh but Jason constantly shook his whole body from side to side as he tried to fight the walker off him. He spun around and slammed the walker against the table but it still wouldn’t let go. When Jason glanced at the window he could see where the walker’s head was so he pulled out his knife and thrust it behind him, luckily stabbing the walker in the eye.

As the body dropped to the floor several more walkers had already poured into the armoury so Jason grabbed the gun closest to his hand, a Heckler & Koch P8, and opened fire on the incoming walkers. Each gunshot resulted in a headshot that dropped the walkers like sacks of cement. Jason dropped the gun and rushed back out the door in time to witness the next group of walkers come crashing down the stairs.

Jason took aim with his AKMSU and opened fire on the walkers at his feet and those at the top of the stairs. The more he fired his gun the more walkers shuffled off the street and crashed down the staircase towards him. They all snarled loudly as they fell and as they reached up to him after having broken their bones on the way down. Jason continued firing at the walkers as they appeared at the top of the stairs before his gun clicked empty yet again. More and more walkers came crashing down the steps so Jason decided to retreat and rush through the armoury and pantry to the other street.

As he made his way up the street the first thing he heard apart from the chorus of undead groans was a dog barking. He recognised the bark as belonging to Brodie and soon discovered Trisha’s house surrounded by walkers. Jason unsheathed his machete and his knife and rushed towards the house. He made short work of the walkers banging on the doors and windows by stabbing them in the back of the head. Once they noticed him, he started slashing them with his machete and shouting at them to get their attention.

Out of the corner of his eye he could see Trisha watching in horror from her bedroom window. The group that had been attacking her house changed course and shuffled towards him while the rest in the street did the same. In order to make sure they didn’t double back, Jason sheathed his knife and pulled out his Taurus to create noise. He shot as many walkers as he could with the gun while carefully backing up, grateful that it held eighteen rounds in a single magazine.

Trisha watched from her bedroom window, biting her knuckle as she watched Jason throw caution to the wind and fight the horde. She struggled to recognise him at first because of the blood covering him and the hat he was wearing which she recognised as Carl’s. Fearful tears fell from her eyes as she watched the herd close in around him. Brodie whined beside her. He had already spent all the bullets in his Taurus and was now using his Operator.

Jason cursed as the chamber of his gun clicked. He holstered the Operator and pulled out his knife again to assist with his machete kills. Despite his grief and the adrenaline providing rage that was still coursing through his veins, he felt panic surge through him. He had been so focused on distracting the herd from Trisha’s house that he had allowed the herd to circle around him and box him in.

Jason grit his teeth as he panted. He wasn’t sure if he had enough energy left to keep fighting or if he could escape from the situation he was now in. The walkers were closing in all around him and he couldn’t kill them all fast enough without getting bitten at least once if not completely devoured. He roared in defiance and continued to hack away at the herd anyway. He would go down fighting.

 

Glenn, Maggie, Sasha and Enid were all crammed in the cabin of the fuel truck while Abraham drove it away from the lake with Daryl standing on top. He stopped when Daryl banged on the roof to let him know they were far enough away. The archer picked up the rocket launcher they had collected on their travels and stood up straight, aiming it at the lake. Daryl pulled the trigger, his shoulder jutting back slightly from the force of the rocket leaving the launcher.

The rocket flew through the air ridiculously fast and exploded on impact with the lake, the fuel in the water instantly erupting into a mass of flames as the explosion rocked the community. The flames soared high above the houses as the fire rapidly spread along the surface of the lake and illuminated the town with a bright flicker of dark gold. The sudden loud explosion and bright light was enough to attract the attention of almost all the walkers in Alexandria. They all turned towards the light as the survivors jumped in shock from the sudden eruption of fire. The walkers began stumbling towards the lake, easily attracted by loud noises and forgetting completely about the people they had been trying to consume.

“Don’t let up!” Rick bellowed and resumed his attack.

The rest of his group did as he instructed. They attacked the walkers with renewed vigour and with greater ease now that the walkers were walking away from them instead of towards them. All the walkers were slowly making their way towards the lake with many of them entering the fiery water, the flames consuming their rotting flesh and burning them to the bone.

Jason quickly realised this was his moment to cheat death and started hacking his way through the walkers that had been behind him. The rest of the hungry corpses were making their way towards the lake so he could afford to ignore them as he stabbed and slashed at the walkers who were still going for him. He couldn’t help but smirk at the ingenuity of the group, whoever had set the lake on fire was a genius and with that distraction they had a solid chance at saving the community.

Jason roared as he killed the last of the walkers that had been attacking him before turning his attention to the ones that were walking away from him. He rushed up behind them and started stabbing them in the heads one after another while slashing and beheading others. This was much easier than the fight for survival he had been enduring for the last hour and the majority of the walkers were completely ignorant to his presence. He ignored the aching of his muscles and kept attacking them.

Glenn rushed through the herd, stabbing the walkers as quickly as possible. He was fighting for his wife and unborn child. Maggie was stabbing the walkers for the same reasons as her husband. Sasha fought the walkers to protect the group and the community they lived in. Abraham bludgeoned the walkers with his rifle so that the group could live, especially Rosita and Sasha. Enid joined the fight as well, recalling what Glenn had told her and fought for her loved ones, Carl, Ron and even Olivia. Daryl stabbed them with expert speed and precision as he fought to keep the group, his only true family, alive.

Within the large line of defence that Rick had formed, Olivia slashed at the walkers to protect her home and the people she cared about. Heath and Tobin also stabbed at the walkers with their knives to protect their home. Barbara, Kent, Bruce and Francine used their machetes and axes to hack and behead the walkers in order to protect their families and their community. Spencer bludgeoned the walkers to protect his home and his mother.

Eric stabbed the walkers so that Aaron could live while Aaron stabbed the walkers so that he and Eric could continue to live in the community. Gabriel slashed the walkers with his machete, desperate to change things so that he never repeated his cowardly past. Eugene also hacked at the walkers to repay the others for all the times they had saved him, now it was time for him to help save them. Tara stabbed at the walkers to keep her friends safe and to keep Denise safe.

Rosita stabbed the walkers quickly, desperate to protect her friends and to protect Abraham. Carol took out her rage on the walkers, stabbing them fearlessly to keep her family alive. Morgan crushed their skulls with his staff so that everyone could continue living in the community. Michonne sliced through the walkers with her sword to keep her family alive, to keep the people who had brought her back from the brink alive. Rick continued to lead the charge with his axe, killing walkers by the dozen so that his son and daughter could live and as a way of avenging Jessie.

Jason remained on the other side of the community and continued stabbing and slashing at the walkers. He was drenched in blood and brain matter just like everyone else but he didn’t care. He kept fighting, desperate to kill all the walkers and take the community back. He was doing it for Carl, to honour his memory and how much he had saved him. It was revenge for everyone he had ever lost to the undead.

Everyone continued fighting through the night. The walker herd seemed to be endless but the large groups were thinning out as more and more bodies hit the floor. All of the residents of Alexandria who had taken the fight to the undead roared and cursed as they slashed, stabbed, hacked, sliced and crushed the walkers. The tide of battle was changing as they held the advantage against the brainless monsters that had invaded their home. They would keep fighting until they had their home back, they would keep fighting until every walker had been eliminated. Alexandria was their home and they weren’t going to give it up without a fight to the death.

 

Three hours later and the community was still enveloped in darkness apart from the flickering light of the fading flames at the lake. The residents continued their assault on the walker herd though the numbers had been lowered to manageable levels. They were able to split up and start checking inside the houses for remaining walkers and double check that all the bodies on the ground were dead for good.

Jason stumbled and almost fell against one of the houses, quickly reaching his arm out to steady himself against the wall. His entire body ached, his muscles burned and his chest was tight, making it hard to breathe. He felt dizzy but he kept going, despite being short of breath and lacking balance. One last walker stumbled up to him, snarling as it did so but Jason lifted his machete with a shaky arm and slammed it down into the cadaver’s skull.

The skull split in two as the walker ceased all movement and dropped to the ground. It almost took Jason with it as he lacked the physical strength to remove the blade from the walker’s head so he simply let go of the handle. Jason took a few more deep breaths in between his desperate pants and rounded the corner.

Jason’s eyes widened as fear shot through him when he came face to face with yet another walker. This one grabbed him by the shoulders and by some super human effort he managed to grab its walkers. The walker pushed all its weight against Jason as it tried to bite his face and managed to knock him back against the wall of the house. Jason’s vision blurred as the back of his head slammed against the building but he forced himself to focus as the walker continued trying to bite him, its teeth snapping together constantly.

It was only then did Jason recognise the walker. The torn open chest cavity, the remnants of a gut covered poncho and messy bloodstained blonde hair revealed its identity. Ron. Jason grit his teeth and growled in a mix of panic and rage as his knees buckled and he crashed to the ground with his back against the wall. Ron’s teeth were inches from his face as he snarled hungrily. Jason moved his left arm and managed to force his forearm under Ron’s chin while his right hand unsheathed his knife.

“You killed Carl!” Jason roared at the undead Ron with tears in his eyes. “But you’re not killing me you little shit!”

Jason thrust the knife into Ron’s temple, the corpse stiffening as it died again. Jason didn’t even bother to remove the knife from Ron’s temple, instead he simply pushed the dead teen off him. The body thudded down beside him as it bled onto the grass. Jason rested his head against the wall as he closed his eyes and panted to get his breath back. He knew he couldn’t stand back up. This was the end for him. In the distance he could hear the fight for Alexandria gradually coming to an end.

Jason pulled Carl’s hat off his head, causing his sweat-soaked hair to fall into his eyes. He shook his head to remove the strands of hair and held the sheriff hat with both hands as he stared down at the front of it. Looking at the hat made so many memories rush through his mind. Memories of his boyfriend. Memories of the boy who saved him from himself. Memories of the one person who was able to make him happy again. Memories of a person who was now gone.

_Jason made it to the top of the stairs just as he heard one of the bedroom doors slam shut. He aimed his gun at the direction of the noise and studied the sight before him. With their back against the door as they tried to catch their breath was a boy. He couldn’t be any older than sixteen. He had a gun holster on the right thigh of his jeans but no gun. His dirty top was blue and grey. His long dark hair whipped out from under the sheriff’s hat he wore but the most striking thing was that he only had one boot on. Before Jason could make any more observations the boy froze as he finally became aware of Jason’s presence. He didn’t say anything. His eyes darted to his gun that lay on the floor, too far away to reach quickly. He stared back at Jason with an intense look of fear in his blue eyes._

_Sensing that the boy was afraid of him, Jason decided to attempt communication but kept his gun aimed at the boy._

_“Hey, kid.” He said calmly. “You okay?”_

_The boy stared at him for a moment, his breath still uneven. “I’m not a kid.”_

_Jason smirked but didn’t lower his aim. “Yeah, well you aren’t a man yet either.”_

_The boy didn’t answer him, unsure of how to respond._

_“What’s your name?” Jason asked him, trying to keep his tone friendly._

_The boy appeared to hesitate for a moment before finally answering. “Carl.”_

When Jason had first met Carl, he would never have even considered them being together a possibility. He had expected Carl to be one of the many people in the apocalypse who he only saw once and then never again. Jason smiled at how wrong he had been and how obvious Carl’s interest in him had been.

_“Is loving someone worth it anymore?” Carl asked, yet another question that came out of nowhere._

_“What do you mean?” Jason asked, slightly stunned by the wording of the question._

_“Well, any one of us could die tomorrow or even tonight.” Carl explained himself, his tone depressingly low. “Won’t love just bring even more pain?”_

_Jason thought for a moment, looking ahead through the windscreen at the campfire. Carl did have a point but he couldn’t accept it to be true. There was always more than one way to look at things._

_“That’s true but it also makes love all the more special.” Jason answered._

_“Michonne told me that love is something you act on.” Carl told him, though his hesitant tone showed he still didn’t fully understand what that meant._

_“She’s right. The people you know could all die tomorrow.” Jason answered, placing a hand on the boy’s shoulder. “How you make them feel before their time comes is so,_ _so_ _important for that very reason.”_

_“So you should love someone even if you don’t have long?” Carl asked, trying to understand Jason’s way of thinking._

_“Absolutely. I’d rather die having experienced love than died without ever knowing what it felt like.” Jason told him, rubbing his shoulder gently._

Jason noticed the dark patches on the hat. The damp spots where his tears had landed. The strongest memory for him was their first kiss. The way their relationship had officially started.

_Carl turned to look at him and realised their faces were quite close together as a result of examining the scars. Jason realised this too and smirked._

_“We’re kinda close.” He teased._

_Jason had meant it as a joke but Carl couldn’t help but blush at the comment. He knew he cared a lot about Jason. It was obvious to most of the group when they had believed him to be dead at Terminus. Michonne, as his most trusted friend, knew that Jason had become very important to Carl. He felt his heart pound in his chest. He wanted something but he wasn’t sure what it was._

_Jason noticed the blush and the slight change in Carl’s breathing. He was suddenly nervous and Jason couldn’t figure out why. Their faces were close together and he had made a light joke about it but now neither of them seemed to want to move._

_“What’s up?” Jason asks quietly, concerned for Carl._

_Carl stuttered, their eyes meeting. He could see the nervousness and pain inside those blue eyes._

_“I…I don’t know.” Carl answered. His face was still red and Jason’s questions weren’t helping._

_Jason moved his face a little closer to Carl’s. They could feel each other’s breath against their faces with how close they were. He was starting to piece it together._

_“Carl?” Jason whispered, not taking his eyes off the teen’s. “Do you_ _like_ _me?”_

_Carl swallowed nervously as his blush intensified. His eyes darted between Jason’s eyes and Jason’s lips. He had never been this close to someone in his life. He had never felt this rush of adrenaline before, it was different from the adrenaline produced by fear or rage. It felt good. There was another feeling but Carl didn’t know how to describe it. Jason’s questioned returned to his mind, realising he awkwardly hadn’t answered it yet. It was an important question. Carl wasn’t sure what his answer was. He was feeling too many new and different things._

_“I…I don’t know.” Carl repeated, his face flaming up with embarrassment._

_Jason felt the very same adrenaline coursing through him. He had noticed how Carl’s eyes darted from his eyes to his lips, how he swallowed nervously and how red his face had turned. He recalled that Carl had never been intimate with anyone in his life. This situation was new to him and he didn’t know how to react. Although he said he didn’t know if he liked Jason or not, Jason took that as a positive reaction. He had to guide Carl through this. He had to make a decision._

_Carl’s eyes widened as Jason closed the gap between them. He felt warm lips on his own. They were soft and gentle. Nothing was forced. His heartbeat accelerated. This was what he had wanted. This was why he had got so nervous. The feeling he couldn’t describe was want. Desire. Jason pulled away slightly and gazed into Carl’s eyes, looking for any signs of rejection. He couldn’t find any._

_“Is this okay?” Jason asked, placing a hand gently on the back of Carl’s neck._

_Carl swallowed nervously again and nodded slowly. He wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do or what he was supposed to say. Jason closed the gap again, connecting their lips just as gently as before._

Jason’s body shook as he cried. He couldn’t hold it in anymore as he felt an emptiness where his heart used to be. When Kellin was dying in his arms he had doubted his ability to survive but he had managed it somehow. This time with Carl was different. It hurt too much. He knew from experience that it was a pain that was never going to go away and Jason didn’t want to feel that pain anymore. He apologised to Carl in his mind as he pulled out his TRP Operator and leaned his head against the barrel.

“Jason, don’t!” A familiar voice stopped him.

Jason opened his eyes, his vision blurred by tears to find Kellin kneeling in front of him also crying.

“You promised, remember?” Kellin pleaded with him. “You promised you wouldn’t.”

“I can’t keep that promise anymore.” Jason argued, tears falling down his face as he panted unevenly.

“Why not?” Kellin asked, holding Jason’s free hand.

“Because the two people I loved most in this world are gone and I can’t do this anymore!” Jason spat, his lips quivering uncontrollably as he continued to cry. “I want to join you both. Please. Forgive me.”

Before the hallucination of Kellin could mount any kind of counter argument, Jason made his decision, closed his eyes and pulled the trigger.

 

When the sun creeped out from below the horizon, Alexandria was a very different place than it had been the night before. The streets ran red with blood. Thousands of bodies littered the ground, making it impossible to walk through the community without tripping over a rotting corpse. A pillar of black smoke rose from the lake as the last flames continued to burn a little longer with charred bodies floating in the water around them. The community had also lost seven members during the chaos.

Michonne walked through the streets with her sword sheathed on her back. The last walker had been killed an hour earlier and peace had returned to the town. Rick had rushed off to check on Carl as soon as he was able to, desperate to know if his son was still alive or not. Most of the others had done the same after hearing what happened to him. Before he rushed off to the infirmary, Rick had asked Michonne to find Jason as he hadn’t been seen for hours. They both feared the worse.

Her heart sank when she finally found him and had her fears confirmed. Michonne made her way up to the side of the house where a bunch of corpses lay on the grass, one of which had Jason’s machete stuck in its forehead and another had a knife sticking out its temple. She felt her legs tremble as she looked at one body in particular, tears welling up in her eyes. How was she going to explain this to Carl when he woke up?

Slumped against the wall of the house, covered head to toe in blood was Jason. His bloodstained hair covered most of his face due to the drooped posture of his neck. She couldn’t tell if the blood was his or belonged to walkers. His arms and legs were splayed out and lay limp. His handgun rested in the open palm of his right hand, the chamber slid back to indicate the gun was empty. Next to his left hand sat Carl’s sheriff hat, stained with dry blood splatters.

After a night of constant walker killing she didn’t have the strength to carry Jason’s body back to the others. Michonne considered waiting before giving everyone the bad news as it was perhaps more considerate to give them time to get over the night’s events a bit more. One thing she could do was take Carl’s hat back and tell Rick what had happened. She understood what had happened with Jason.

When Michonne lifted the hat a hand suddenly shot up and grabbed her wrist. The action was so unexpected that the samurai flinched back in surprise and reached for her sword, expecting the tight grip to be from a walker. However, it couldn’t have been a walker because the grip was from a warm hand, not a stiff, cold hand that was typical of the undead. Looking down she was met with Jason’s bloodshot eyes staring back up at her through his hair. He had dark bags under his eyes and his skin was pale but he was alive.

“I’m not dead yet.” Jason croaked out with a hoarse voice. “So, I think I’ll have that back.”

Michonne’s lip quivered wildly as she grinned, relief washing over her as the tears fell down her face, her hands gripping Jason’s shoulders. She could tell Jason was of ill-health but he was alive and that was all that mattered.

“Don’t get too excited.” Jason remarked just as hoarsely. “I’ll be dead soon.”

Michonne felt her blood run cold. “Why? Were you bit?”

Jason shrugged his shoulders. “Don’t think so but what does it matter? I’ve got nothing left.”

“Yes you do.” Michonne retorted, furrowing her brow at this unexpected pessimism.

“Carl’s dead, Michonne! And I died with him!” Jason barked weakly. “I didn’t survive because I _wanted_ to. I just didn’t die. Luck. That’s all.”

Michonne gripped his shoulders in an effort to calm him down. “Carl’s alive.”

“Don’t try to save me with lies.” Jason hissed, knocking her hands away weakly. “I watched him die.”

“No. You watched him get shot.” Michonne corrected him firmly. “Denise saved his life. Come to the infirmary and see.”

Jason swayed in place, struggling to process the information he had just received. His lover, the person he cared most about in the apocalyptic world, who he had believed to be dead, was still alive. His wish for more time, for a second chance, had been granted by some unseen force. If Jason was religious he would have been thanking God. He nodded slowly.

Michonne wrapped Jason’s arm around her shoulders and helped to lift him to his feet. His muscles felt like they had been shredded completely by the night’s battle. He couldn’t walk unaided and his whole body seared with pain as he stumbled with Michonne’s help. He knew he would need to be seen to by Denise but he didn’t care about that. Jason just wanted to see Carl.

It took the two of them longer than usual to reach the infirmary due to Jason’s lack of stability on his feet mixed with the mass of dead bodies that littered the streets. When they arrived at the infirmary, Jason saw everyone for the first time since the previous day. Barbara, Kent, Bruce, Spencer, Eric, Aaron, Tara, Rosita, Enid, Olivia, Heath, Sasha, Abraham, Carol, Morgan and Gabriel were all resting outside. They were clearly holding a vigil for Carl.

They all stared at Jason with a mix of relief and sympathy. None of them said anything because it wasn’t necessary and they all understood there was only one place Jason needed to be. For a moment, he locked eyes with Enid and although she didn’t say anything he could tell something had changed. She looked at him with genuine concern and sympathy instead of the brash cynicism he had been accustomed to. He made a mental note to speak to her as Michonne led him inside.

Inside the infirmary, Glenn and Maggie were helping each other and basking in their reunion. Daryl sat on the gurney while Denise patched up a nasty stab wound he had on his back. She looked at Jason with obvious concern but Michonne slowly shook her head, silencing whatever the doctor was about to say. She led Jason down the hall and opened the door.

Jason felt his chest constrict tightly around his heart when he saw Carl lying in bed. He had been stripped and cleaned and now lay on the bed unconscious with a bandage wrapped round his head that covered his eye. Rick was slouched back on the chair next to him, snoring softly while still covered in walker blood. Michonne helped Jason round to the other side of the bed and sat him down on the chair.

Jason breathed heavily as he fought to hold back his tears. He didn’t want to cry in front of Michonne for some reason that was as unknown to him as anyone else. He peeled off his fingerless gloves and stuffed them in his jacket pockets before holding Carl’s limp hand in his own. Carl didn’t look peaceful to Jason. It wasn’t the same as when he slept in their bed. Carl’s body was more rigid and the large bandage hinted at the horror of the wound underneath.

“How?” Jason gasped out. It had been a whole question but only one word had come out.

“The bullet hit him at an angle and destroyed his eye.” Michonne explained with a grim expression. “Denise has done the best she could to stitch it up.”

“So, now what?” Jason asked, his voice just a whisper as his body shook.

“Now all we can do is wait.” Michonne answered and left the room without another word.

Jason squeezed Carl’s hand as he looked at the younger teen’s unconscious form. With Michonne out of the room Jason couldn’t stop the flood of tears from streaming down his face as he shook and gasped as he cried. He couldn’t believe Carl was still alive, he couldn’t believe that he had been given a second chance. He was incredibly lucky that he had wasted all his bullets on the walkers or he would have been dead by now and would never have known.

“Carl? I don’t know if you can hear me but if you can I need you to listen.” Jason spoke lowly, staring at his face to watch for any possible reaction. “Please don’t leave me. I know you think I’m strong but I’m not. I’m weak, Carl. That’s why I need you.”

Jason watched as his tears fell on Carl’s limp hand and left damp patches on the bedsheets.

“I can’t do it. I can’t face this world alone, Carl. I can’t survive it without you.” Jason gasped out as he tried not to cry too loud. “You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me, please don’t leave me, Carl.”

Jason bowed his head as he scrunched up his face and let himself cry strongly. His body shook with each gasp for air as the tears streamed down his face. As he recalled all the memories he had shared with Carl, a realisation of what day it was hit him. He lifted Carl’s hand and kissed the back of it.

“Happy two months, poppet.” Jason choked out.

Their relationship had started exactly two months ago. Jason had originally planned to spend the night before and the whole day celebrating it with Carl. Instead, he was sitting at his bedside wondering if he would ever wake up again. It was torture to see him in such a vulnerable state and be absolutely powerless to help him.

“You’re the best thing to ever happen to him.” Rick’s voice seemed to boom in the quiet room. “I’ve never seen him happier than when he is with you.”

Jason looked up at Rick with heavy eyes. “It’s my fault. I knew Ron was trouble. I should have done something.”

“I was the one who took us out there.” Rick rasped back. “It’s not on you.”

“It is. The commotion in the garage was Ron trying to kill Carl.” Jason explained, wiping his tears away with his thumb. “I should have stopped him.”

“You couldn’t have predicted what happened out there.” Rick responded, still grieving for Jessie. “What happened to Sam, to Jessie.”

Jason remained silent. He actually had predicted that Sam would most likely die but Jessie’s hysterical reaction he hadn’t anticipated. He still felt guilty about not killing Ron when he had the chance. If he had, Carl wouldn’t be lying in the bed beside him missing an eye.

“I’m sorry for abandoning you out there.” Rick apologised, leaning forward. “I tried to go back for you but…”

Jason raised his hand. “Rick, it’s okay. You did the right thing.”

Rick stared back at him, trying to gauge his sincerity. He didn’t think it was okay. In hindsight it probably didn’t really matter because Jason had survived. What was done was done.

“Is Judith okay?” Jason asked, realising he hadn’t seen the child.

Rick smiled. “She’s fine. Gabriel got her to the church safely before helping us.”

Jason leaned back in his chair and smiled. “I guess we were both wrong about him.”

“We were wrong about a lot of things.” Rick replied before narrowing his eyes. “You should get cleaned up and have Denise take a look at you.”

Jason shook his head. “I’m where I need to be.”

“You don’t look well.” Rick argued gently. “It’ll only take a minute.”

“No. I’m staying here until he wakes up.” Jason retorted. “And if he doesn’t, then I’ll deal with it. You shouldn’t have to do that, Rick.”

“He could be like this for a while.” Rick pressed. “You need checked out, cleaned up and some food in you.”

Jason smiled softly as he rested his head on his hands as they held Carl’s. “I’m fine, Rick. I’ve been given a second chance.”

After a few minutes the steady rise and fall of Jason’s chest told Rick that he had passed out. The leader was concerned for his son’s boyfriend but at least if anything happened they were already in the infirmary. Rick looked down at his unconscious son and held his open hand.

“I was wrong. I thought after living behind these walls for so long that maybe they couldn’t learn.” Rick whispered to Carl. “But today I saw what they could do, what _we_ could do if we work together.”

Rick couldn’t believe how effective the Alexandrians had been at fighting the walkers with him and his group. The formation they had put in place had worked perfectly. Just over twenty people had eliminated over eight thousand walkers over the course of a few hours.

“We’ll rebuild the walls, we’ll expand the walls. There’ll be more, there’s gotta be more.” Rick continued. “Everything Deanna was talking about is possible, it’s all possible, I see that now.”

Rick glanced over at Jason’s sleeping form. They had all been given second chances. Carl deserved to be safe and to be happy. As the new leader of Alexandria, Rick now shouldered the responsibility to make sure the community was a safe place for his family.

“When I was out there with them and it was over, when I knew we had this place again I had this feeling. It took me a while to remember what it was because I haven’t felt it since before I woke up in that hospital.” Rick explained to his son as he too broke down into tears. “I wanna show you the new world, Carl. I wanna make it a reality for you. Please, Carl, let me show you.”

For the first time since the apocalypse began, Rick felt hope. He knew they could survive and that they could thrive. The residents of Alexandria were ready. They were family now and he knew they could accomplish great things together. All Rick asked for was that Carl would wake up and get to see it happen and get to live it.

Rick’s eyes opened after being squeezed shut due to his tears when he felt movement against his hand. He looked down to discover that Carl’s limp hand had tensed into a light grip that held his father’s larger hand. Rick didn’t know if Carl was awake or not but it was a positive sign that filled him with even more hope than before.

Rick knew things would be difficult. He was also aware that Carl could be unconscious for a while and may not ever make a full recovery but for now his son was alive. They had taken the community back and almost everyone had survived the night. There was hope after all and that was all that mattered.

**So there we go. The chapter is finally done and it is massive. This took a while to write due to the size of it and also because of stuff going on in my personal life.**

**To make up for the long delay, I have a proposition for my readers/fans.**

**The next few chapters are going to cover the 2 month gap between episodes 9 and 10. As 2 months is a long time, I’m asking you to send in the scenes you would like to see. The requests can be as detailed or as vague as you like. The scenes you want to see can be specific events, interactions between specific characters or entire storylines that can play out throughout the next couple chapters.**

**Obviously I do have a general outline for the next chapters, but the more ideas and inspiration I receive the faster I’ll be able to upload them. So send your ideas to me in the reviews/comments, in private messages or to my ask.fm or my Tumblr.**

**Anyways, hope you’ve enjoyed the chapter and can take the time to leave a comment/review so I know what you liked and didn’t like.**

**Thanks for all the kudos/favourites/votes/bookmarks etc.**

**Thanks to the reviewers of chapter 27: Sarah_94, Hunter, jar98, xoneworldx, ThoUgHT_PurGes, hideyoshinagachika, kingcarlgrimes, uruark, Fan, Thewalkingdeadisthebestshow, xayylaax, NukeRose, NicosWriting 87, Dark.SKY27, ElleWatt and SovietSpaceDog.**

 


	29. Nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The residents of Alexandria begin to clean up after defeating the massive herd. However, with Carl bed-ridden and comatose after being shot by Ron, can Jason hold himself together?

The infirmary was quiet. An hour earlier Rick had left to get cleaned up as had many of the other residents. There was plenty of work to do after the battle for Alexandria had concluded. The community was vulnerable as part of the wall had been flattened by the collapsed tower and thousands of bodies littered the streets and houses. There were missing residents, which indicated to the high possibility of fatalities and the bodies all had to be removed to prevent disease. Everyone was going to need to work together to restore Alexandria to its former glory.

The infirmary was quiet. Denise and Tara were enjoying each other’s company after the harrowing events of the previous night. Tara had been convinced that she would never see her girlfriend again after the Wolf took her with him into the herd. She had been even more amazed when Denise had told her the story of her survival. The Wolf had somehow been a good person underneath all his madness and had sacrificed himself so that she could make it to safety. If it hadn’t been for him, Denise would never have been able to save Carl’s life when Rick thundered in with the dying boy in his arms.

The infirmary was quiet. In the backroom where Carl lay motionless in bed, Jason sat on a chair beside him. He had refused to leave Carl’s side, despite his own poor state of health. He was still exhausted as he was unable to sleep, the only times he had been unconscious were the result of passing out. His body ached all over from his overworked muscles and the physical stress of fighting the undead for hours without stopping. He hadn’t eaten or drank anything either, leaving him drowsy and feeble from lack of energy.

“There used to be a greying tower alone on the sea, you became the light on the dark side of me.” Jason sang softly to the comatose Carl, squeezing his hand softly. “Love remained a drug that’s the high and not the pill.”

Jason stopped suddenly when he heard movement in the doorway. He looked up to find Denise standing there with a warm smile on her face.

“Kiss from a rose.” She named the song as she stepped into the room.

“Got it in one.” Jason rasped, his throat sore and raw.

“I’ve been a fan of Seal for years.” Denise explained as she made her way over to the other side of the bed so she could check on Carl.

“I read once that it’s good to talk and sing to coma victims.” Jason explained hoarsely, justifying the singing.

Denise nodded as she checked Carl’s pulse. “That’s right. A lot of coma victims can hear what’s happening around them.”

“I hope he can hear me.” Jason rasped as he gazed at Carl’s expressionless face.

“I hope so too.” Denise added with a reassuring smile.

 

Rick stood on the small stage at the front of Alexandria’s church. He had called everyone to attend a meeting there after the horrific yet victorious night they had. Most of the members of the community were now sat on the pews in front of him, with a few notable exceptions of Denise, Jason, Carl and some of the older members of Alexandria. Everyone else, especially those who had fought the night before were assembled.

The atmosphere was thick and heavy, as if they tension in the air made it harder to breathe. They had won. They had defeated the herd that had invaded their home but in the process there had been losses. It was still unknown how many people had died but known victims included Deanna and the Anderson family. Rick grit his teeth behind his sealed lips and forced the grief away. Alexandria needed a leader. They needed Rick Grimes and he couldn’t show weakness at a time like this. He remembered Deanna’s words vividly in his mind, as they had only been spoken less than twelve hours before.

_“Rick!” Deanna beckoned him back over, pulling out some pieces of paper. “I wrote something for Spencer, for Maggie.”_

_Rick took the pieces of paper from her and pocketed them. “I’ll make sure they get them.”_

_“Will you look out for him?” Deanna asked the man beside her, resting her hand on one of his._

_“I will.” Rick replied, feeling tears stinging his eyes._

_“Will you look out for him like you look out for your people?” Deanna asked, referencing their conversation from before the tower fell._

_Rick stared down at her, feeling partly guilty for her not being able to properly say goodbye to her son. He also knew that he didn’t care about Spencer like he cared about his own family. It wouldn’t be right to make a promise he wasn’t going to keep._

_“Guess what?” Deanna challenged, sensing his inner conflict. “They’re all your people, Rick. They are.”_

_“We haven’t had a chance to make it that.” Rick countered. Deanna was still the leader, even now._

_“But that’s how it is.” Deanna retorted with a smile. “I didn’t run over to help you out there because I like you, or because I think you’re a good man, a good father, or that you can grow one hell of a beard.”_

_Rick couldn’t help but smirk in amusement at that final remark. It was one of the first and few amusing conversations they had when he shaved the beard off completely. Everyone had passed some kind of comment._

_“I ran over to help because you are one of us.” Deanna finished with a wise smirk. “That’s the right answer.”_

“You know, when I first got here I thought our people would always have to protect your people.” Rick began grimly, venting frustration at previous mistakes. “That we’d always have to be your last line of defence against the world outside.”

The Alexandrians stared back at him with confusion and hesitation visible on their faces. This wasn’t the meeting they were expecting to have after saving Alexandria.

“But last night, you stepped up. All of you. You fought to protect your home. We all fought together to protect our home.” Rick continued, allowing his face to display some pride. “You have what it takes to survive. I was wrong.”

There were some proud smiles among the Alexandrians, and even a few smirks from the likes of Abraham and Daryl. Rick wasn’t wrong. The community had turned into an army and had worked together to become an impenetrable wall to counter the walker invasion.

“Last night I saw what we can do together. It’s no longer about your people and our people because you are our people.” Rick smiled, resting his hands on his belt. “We’re all in this together, we’re family and together we can do anything.”

Rick’s expression quickly changed to a far more grim and serious one. Now that he had praised the Alexandrians for their stunning change they could focus on what needed to be done. There was a lot of work ahead of them as the wall had been flattened by the tower while debris and bodies littered the community.

“We’ll split into teams. Sasha and Abraham will guard the gap in the wall while the construction crew work on clearing the debris and rebuilding that section.” Rick commanded of them. “Glenn, Daryl, Heath and Tobin, you’re all with me. We’ll get the vehicles from the quarry and use them to transport the bodies. Everyone else should help pile the walkers by the gate and take our dead to the cemetery.”

“What about the funerals?” Barbara asked, interrupting him. “We have to say goodbye to everyone we lost.”

“And we will tonight if there’s time.” Rick answered gently. “And if there’s not enough time tonight then tomorrow morning will do. We need to secure this place before we can take time to grieve.”

Barbara nodded in silent agreement as did everyone else. As hard as it was to just keep moving forward after the tragic deaths of several people, they knew more deaths would follow if they didn’t fix the wall and clear the bodies. Rick gave a single nod to them all and headed down the aisle towards the door, with everyone standing up to follow him. There was work to be done.

 

Jason sat by Carl’s bed, stroking the younger teen’s hand with his thumb softly. Carl always looked peaceful when he slept but this was different, there was a vulgarity to the picture in front of him. The make-shift hospital bed, the horrendous size of the bandage wrapped round his head and covering his eye. The worst thing was the unnatural stillness with which he lay in the bed. If not for his pulse he could easily be mistaken for dead.

Denise sat in the other room with one of her many medical textbooks open. Tara was busy outside helping to clear the bodies with everyone else. The infirmary was uncomfortably quiet as the two of them sat a room apart from one another. Jason slowly took a breath. He couldn’t stand the silence nor could he stand the questions and doubts that plagued his mind.

“Does it say in any of your books how long he could be in a coma for?” Jason finally asked. He had tried his best to avoid the question but he had to know.

Denise sighed and looked through the doorway at him with pity in her eyes. “No. Jason, you need to understand that his chances of surviving are slim. I know it’s hard to hear.”

Jason stood up and made towards the doorway to confront her about the answer she had just given him. It had been in vague terms and he wanted to see what the textbooks actually said. With each step, however, her message sank in a little deeper before he stopped. He swayed on the spot as he processed what should have been obvious to him. Carl could die. He could simply never wake up and these were his last days with him.

“Are you alright?” Denise asked the young man as he placed his weight against the doorframe.

Jason shook his head and started to speak before his knees buckled and he dropped to the floor. He went straight down, as if he was conscious of hitting his head on anything should he fall forward or back. Denise called his name and rushed over to him, lifting his head off the floor only to find the teen had passed out.

Denise racked her brain for a possible explanation. He had appeared fine over the last couple hours except for being extremely exhausted. She knew he had spent all night fighting the walkers and had managed to get some sleep when he saw Carl alive for the first time. Since then, however, he hadn’t slept, eaten or drank anything. She stood up and opened a cabinet on the other side of the room, retrieving an intravenous bag from it.

 

Outside in the streets of Alexandria, Rick stood by the main gate with Tobin, Glenn, Heath and Daryl. They were well armed and ready to head out to the quarry on foot. Rick gestured to the centre of the intersection just up from the gate.

“We can pile the bodies here. When we get back we’ll reverse the trucks in and start loading them in.” Rick told them. “Once they’re all back in the quarry we’ll light them up, that should buy us time to fix the wall.”

Everyone followed his lead, with Morgan, Eric, Bruce and Kent already working together to start dragging the bodies over to the pile. It was going to take all day and it would require help from everyone to get all the bodies in one spot and into the trucks. As everyone started grunting with exertion as they lifted and dragged the bodies into position, Rick left with the others in the direction of the quarry.

From the gaping chasm in the wall where the tower fell, Abraham and Sasha stood on top of what remained of the Del Arno Foods truck that the wolves had crashed into the wall. The truck itself was a bitter reminder that the wolves had been the real cause of all the death and carnage. If they hadn’t attacked then Rick’s plan would have worked without any problems and no one except Carter would have died. Unfortunately, they had both long since gotten used to the cruelty of the post-apocalyptic world.

Sasha turned her attention to the clean-up going on inside the walls. The construction crew had started by salvaging the wood from the tower as most of it could be put to other uses. Despite the tower having crushed the wall entirely, the general structure wasn’t too badly damaged and the metal sheets looked like they could be used again. There was the slight hope that the reparation wouldn’t be as gruelling a task as they had initially expected it to be.

“Gotta hand it to Rick. His boy’s lying in there half-dead and he’s out leading the charge.” Abraham commented to her. “That man there’s harder than a teen on the blue pill.”

“Do you think Carl will make it?” Sasha asked, still watching as Aaron and Maggie searched the dead for their own.

“If the boy’s half as tough as his father he’ll pull through just fine.” Abraham replied optimistically.

 

Jason groaned as he woke up. His head was pounding and he was disorientated. It took him a few moments to recognise his surroundings as one of the beds in the infirmary. He raised his hand to rub his forehead and felt a twinge of pain in his arm as he moved it. He looked down to find the intravenous drip stuck into his arm.

The more he came to his senses the faster his recollection came together. He hadn’t felt very well all of a sudden after Denise told him Carl might not make it. He had felt his legs weaken and then everything went dark. Jason quickly understood that he had passed out and now was on one of the beds, though how Denise was able to get him into the bed was a mystery. She didn’t look strong enough to manhandle his dead weight like that.

“He’s awake!” Tara’s voice chirped from across the room, catching his attention.

Within seconds, Tara and Denise were upon him. Tara looked him over while Denise checked the IV drip.

“How’re you feeling?” Tara asked him with a friendly smile.

“On a scale of 1 to 10? Shitty.” Jason replied with a shrug. “What happened?”

“You passed out from dehydration.” Denise informed him as she removed the IV. “I needed Spencer’s help to get you into this bed.”

“How’s Carl?” Jason asked, looking towards the closed door.

“No change. He’s stable.” Tara told him as he rolled his sleeve back down and swung his legs over the edge of the bed. “But you need to worry about yourself.”

“I’m fine.” He retorted as he reached for his jacket.

“No, you’re not.” Tara told him, making subtle eye contact with Denise. “You haven’t slept, eaten or drank anything in a day. You’re exhausted and still covered in walker blood.”

“So?” Jason challenged her, making his way for Carl’s room but found his path blocked by both women.

“So, we’ve decided we won’t let you see him until you get a shower, some sleep and some food.” Tara sternly laid down the ultimatum.

“And how exactly do either of you plan on stopping me on your own?” Jason hissed with uncharacteristic venom.

Denise found herself taking a step back but Tara held her ground. “A strong breeze could knock you down.”

Jason snorted incredulously and took two steps forward before Tara shoved him back against the bed. The blood covered teen managed to catch himself before he completely lost his balance and glared at Tara who was scowling at him by this point.

“Cut the tough guy crap, Jason!” She scolded him. “When Carl wakes up he’s gonna need you at full strength. Stop trying to be a martyr and take care of yourself for a few hours.”

Jason scowled back at her. He hadn’t expected such an outburst from Tara of all people. He still couldn’t find it in himself to accept their ultimatum. They had no right to dictate to him when he could see his boyfriend in his time of need.

As if sensing his struggle, Denise spoke up. “If his condition changes you’ll be the first to know.”

Jason studied the sincere look on Denise’s face and the stern yet understanding look on Tara’s. He closed his eyes and let out a deep breath as his shoulders dropped from their tense position. They had a point and he wasn’t proud of himself for how he had just acted. He nodded and headed for the door.

Once he had closed it behind him, he walked along the infirmary porch and out onto the sun-lit street. He raised his hand to block the sun out of his eyes as the sudden brightness burned at his retinas and highlighted the dark bags under his eyes. His muscles still ached with every movement but he did his best to wilfully ignore the pain.

As he stopped to observe his surroundings he could finally see the extent of the walker invasion. Despite being right in the middle of it the night before, he had been fuelled by adrenaline, rage and grief so he had no real sense of scale. He had just wanted to kill every single walker he laid eyes on. Seeing a carpet of bodies in the streets really showed how close they had all been to certain death.

His hand moved from above his eyes to in front of his nose. The stench of death finally reached his nostrils and brutally assaulted his senses. The foulest odour in the air was the rancid smell of burned walker corpses that lay around the lake with some floating in the water. He felt his stomach churn as he observed the putrid corpses and hoped there was some kind of water filtration system in place.

“Look who finally surfaced.” Michonne’s voice rang from his right. “How’s Carl?”

“No change.” Jason answered flatly, lowering his hand as he slowly got used to the reek of rotting flesh. “What’s going on?”

“Rick’s got everyone working to clear the bodies and rebuild the wall.” Michonne informed him. “We can’t afford to relax until this place is safe again.”

Jason nodded in agreement. “Okay, I’ll help with that.”

“Jason, you need to rest and get a shower at least.” Michonne insisted with a sigh.

Jason looked down at his blood stained hands and clothes and shrugged. “No point showering if I’m going to be dragging corpses about and besides, you said it yourself. We can’t rest until all the work is done.”

“Jason, I’m serious.” The samurai tried to argue as the teen grabbed the closest body by the ankles and started dragging it.

“So am I!” He retorted with a grunt of effort as he dragged the corpse, leaving a dark trail of blood behind him.

 

Jason stared down at the corpse as he stood over it. He felt nothing but disdain for the person it once was. The body had been mutilated, the chest cavity torn open and the clothes soaked red with blood. He bent down and pulled the knife out of the walker’s temple, wiping down the blade before sheathing it on his belt. Jason stood up straight and stared down at the mangled corpse yet again.

Ron didn’t have an easy life. Jason did understand that on some level but he felt his hatred overshadow it. Jason’s life hadn’t been easy either but he hadn’t resorted to violence and murder. He hadn’t lost control of himself to that extent. Ron, on the other hand, had tried to kill Carl at least once and had almost managed it when he shot him in the eye. Jason could still see it all so vividly in his mind.

_The click of a gun safety was enough to make both teens spin around on the spot. Carl’s eyes widened in shock when he saw that his Beretta was now in Ron’s hands and was being aimed directly at Rick. Ron’s eyes were cold. The mixture of stress and shock was too much and he was in an even worse state than he had been in the garage. Jason quickly pulled out his Operator and aimed it at Ron’s head._

_“You…” Ron gasped out, glaring at Rick._

_Rick was the man who had killed his father. Rick was the man who had led his family out into the herd to die. Rick was the man who had killed his entire family, just like he knew he would. Rick was going to die for what he had done. Then Carl would die for taking Enid from him. Then Jason would die as well. They would all die._

_“Put it down or I’ll kill you.” Jason hissed. “I don’t care if every walker hears it.”_

_“You.” Ron wasn’t listening. He didn’t care. He squeezed the trigger._

_Jason was about to shoot him when suddenly Michonne’s sword erupted out of Ron’s chest. She knew he was going to pull the trigger and couldn’t let it happen. Ron’s eyes widened as his arms and legs splayed apart. His finger pulled the trigger and fired the gun but the bullet missed its target. Jason holstered his gun as Ron’s body fell to the ground. Rick nodded to Michonne in gratitude as they all let out a sigh of relief. It was over. They were okay._

_Jason turned to check on Carl and make sure he was okay after seeing his friend die in front of him. He froze when he saw blood trickling down Carl’s cheek from under his hat. Rick noticed Jason’s horrified expression and turned to look at his son. He too saw the blood running down Carl’s cheek as the teen lifted his head and looked at his father. More blood poured from the hole where his right eye used to be. The bullet had struck his eye socket._

_“Dad?” Carl gasped out weakly before collapsing on the ground._

Jason felt himself shake with rage. He had seen the warning signs, he had known Ron was going to be dangerous and he hadn’t acted. If he had, then Carl would have been perfectly fine and wouldn’t be lying comatose in a bed, clinging to life. Before he knew what he was doing, Jason pulled his knife out again and stabbed Ron’s corpse in the right eye socket, puncturing the milky eyeball. He pulled the knife out and thrust it back in, repeatedly stabbing Ron’s eye socket as his whole body shook with grief.

He continued to shake as he forced himself to calm down and remove the knife from Ron’s skull. The blade of the knife dripped with blood and brain matter as Jason looked at it. Nothing he did could change what happened and Carl was hanging on by a thread. Jason bellowed and threw the knife at the wall in front of him, the blade embedding itself in the wooden panels. He wiped his eyes with his sleeve and grabbed a roll of tarp that had been laid out on the streets should anyone come across one of their own.

He spread the tarp out on the ground before lifting Ron’s corpse off the ground, grunting at the surprising weight of it before dumping it on the tarp. Jason carefully rolled the tarp around Ron’s mutilated body and tied the ends so that it stayed wrapped around the younger teen. With another loud heave of effort, he lifted the tarp covered body onto his shoulder in a fireman’s carry and started making his way towards the cemetery. He wasn’t sure he wanted to know just how many people had died.

As Jason slowly made his way through the streets, stepping over walker corpses every couple of steps, he watched as everyone did their part to rebuild. Most of the community were dragging walkers down towards the main gate where he could see the faint outline of a body pile being formed. He could already hear the hammering of wood and metal from the construction crew where the wall had gone down when the tower fell. Michonne had been right, there was no time for rest until Alexandria was safe again.

When he reached the cemetery, marked with its conifer trees, he found Aaron and Maggie already there. They greeted him with grim expressions and a subtle nod as he laid the tarp down and unravelled it to reveal Ron’s corpse. Once Jason stood up he saw the half-eaten remains of Jessie and Sam had already been laid out, so he moved Ron so they were all together.

“Who else have we lost?” Jason asked them grimly.

“Lucy, Maya, Pascal and Ted.” Aaron replied, gesturing over to the four other bodies that lay in a line.

Jason looked over at the two men and two women who all lay next to each other. All of their remains were in a similar, grotesquely half-eaten state. He vaguely recognised them but had never spoken to any of them directly. What did surprise Jason was the lack of children apart from Ron and Sam.

“What about the kids?” He asked quickly.

“They’re all accounted for.” Aaron told him with a weak smile. “I guess you made the right call when you taught them how to survive.”

Jason glanced down at the floor and nodded. If only he had done more. If only he had dealt with Ron after the fight with Carl. He should have told Rick what was going on. He should have taken action.

“Jason, have you seen Deanna?” Maggie asked. “Last I saw her she was running from the herd with you and the others.”

Jason felt his face fall at the question, which was enough to tell Maggie all she needed to know. The teen lowered his gaze yet again and let out a shaky breath before finally answering.

“She’s gone. She got bit and there was nothing we could do.” Jason told them, his eyes reddening with the threat of tears. “But she chose to go down fighting. I heard it.”

“Does Rick know?” Maggie asked quickly.

Jason nodded. “Yeah, he knows. He was there.”

Aaron could sense the hurt in Maggie’s tone. “He needs everyone to be focused right now, that’s probably why he didn’t tell us.”

Maggie bit her lip as tears welled in her eyes at the news of Deanna’s passing. “Yeah, you’re right.”

Jason looked at the bodies around them. “We should cover them up. People don’t need to see what little is left of them.”

Aaron and Maggie agreed without a word and started covering the bodies back up in tarp except for their faces when possible. As they worked on that, Jason looked over towards the street and spotted Carol staring over. The older woman may have had a good poker face but Jason could see how upset she was. She must have seen who the dead were.

Carol knew Jason had spotted her but she couldn’t tear her eyes away. She knew she had spotted the unmistakable form of Sam Anderson. The young boy who she had initially tried to push away until she learned of his abusive father. The young boy who was much like her own daughter, Sophia, a person much too kind for the world they now lived in. She had tried her best to toughen him up so he wouldn’t die but just like all the others, Sophia, Mika, Lizzy and the children at the prison, she had failed yet again.

“Carol, you okay?” Morgan questioned, seemingly appearing out of nowhere.

Carol wiped away the wetness from her eyes and walked away from him, dragging a new corpse down the street with her. The last person she was going to speak to was Morgan.

 

“How’s it looking down there?” Abraham called to the construction crew from atop the truck.

Bruce, Francine and a few others were sifting through the debris, collecting planks and panels of wood from the demolished tower while checking the state of the truck. The front cabin had been completely crushed when the tower collapsed.

“Looks like we can salvage the engine and some other parts.” Francine called up.

“The wall collapsed but it looks mostly in-tact.” Bruce added. “The rebuild shouldn’t take us too long.”

“Then get to it.” Abraham told them with a smirk. “Daylight’s burning.”

Beyond the truck, Abraham spotted Jason dragging another corpse down the street. He was easily spotted as he was still covered head to toe in walker blood from the night before. Jason panted from exertion as he reached the pile but found it almost impossible to lift the body onto the pile. His muscles burned and his chest tightened as he tried to find the strength to move the body a little more. He let go of the body and closed his eyes as he gasped for air, struggling to stay on his feet.

“Let me help you.” A voice came from in front of him.

Jason opened his exhausted eyes to find Gabriel in front of him, already lifting the front half of the body off the ground. The younger man was going to protest the need for help but decided to swallow his pride and accept the priest’s help. They lifted the body together with ease and dumped it onto the pile.

“I thought you had died last night.” Gabriel told him. “I didn’t see you with Rick.”

Jason nodded. “Unlike the rest of you, I was that one idiot that fought them alone.”

“I’d call it brave.” Gabriel tried to argue.

Jason shook his head. “It wasn’t. It was cowardice far worse than any you’ve ever shown. You wanted to live and I wanted to die. You were braver than me.”

“Look, Jason. If you ever want to talk about Carl or…” Gabriel began but was quickly interrupted.

“Don’t! Please, just don’t.” Jason snapped before calming down a little. “Not right now. I can’t.”

“I understand.” Gabriel relented, tentatively patting Jason’s arm. “My door is always open.”

Jason smiled momentarily before his expression fell back into grief. He nodded, his eyelids heavy from fatigue before he started walking away. His pace was slow and his gait was uneven. It was obvious to everyone but him that he shouldn’t be out in the streets helping everyone but no one had the courage to tell him otherwise.

 

Birds tweeted energetically in the sunlit trees above them as Rick, Glenn, Daryl, Heath and Tobin ran along the road towards the quarry. It was pretty much a straight path but they had to be quick. Without vehicles they were vulnerable to walkers and people so they had to keep moving fast. The temperature continued to increase as the sun climbed higher in the sky, quickly forcing the five men to sweat enough to make their clothes cling to their skin.

Daryl charged ahead of them by a few meters and slammed his knife into the forehead of an approaching walker. The body dropped to the ground with a thud as the men ran past it. Due to the attack from the herd they were lucky to find the area had a very low walker population. This carried the danger of it being safer for humans and therefore safer for dangerous humans. Abraham, Daryl and Sasha had already told Rick about the men who had ambushed them on the road back. There could always be more groups like that.

They all let out a breath of relief when they made their way over the hill and entered the quarry. The ground was marked by the thousands of shuffled footsteps that had gone past. The most important thing was that all the lorries, the flatbed truck and the pick-up truck were all still there. The three remaining lorries that had originally been used to block the exits had a lot of cargo space for transporting the bodies, as did the flatbed truck.

Rick, Daryl and Glenn each climbed into the cabin of the lorries and started the engines. They would lead the way as they were the largest and most obvious vehicles, should they attract unwanted attention. Heath took control of the flatbed truck and Tobin climbed in the pickup truck. Once they had all signalled to each other that they were ready, they formed a convoy and started making their way back to Alexandria.

 

Jason leaned against the perimeter wall of Alexandria and held the front of his temples with his thumb and forefinger. He closed his eyes and tried to will the dizziness away. There were now several large piles of walker bodies and the stench was overpowering. His muscles were throbbing in agony from over exertion but he kept telling himself to keep going. There was much more that had to be done.

“You look like you could sleep standing up.” Michonne commented as she walked over to join him, her dreadlocks damp with sweat.

“I wish I could.” Jason mumbled in response before lifting his head back up to look at her.

“You should rest, you look awful.” She told him, noticing the dark bags under his eyes.

“Well, we can’t all be beautiful.” Jason retorted as he staggered away from the wall.

“Hey, I’m not joking.” Michonne said sternly, gripping his shoulder. “You don’t look well at all.”

“Tell me something I don’t know.” Jason questioned weakly, sighing as he stared at the body piles.

“He’s going to make it. Carl’s gonna pull through.” Michonne told him firmly. “Don’t give up on him. Don’t even think about what-ifs. He’s going to be fine.”

Jason nodded. “You’re right, Michonne. I don’t know that and neither do you.”

Before Michonne could scold Jason’s pessimism, Spencer came up to them looking rather worried. He was breathing hard from all the hard work.

“Have either of you seen my mother?” He asked them.

Jason and Michonne glanced at each other awkwardly before Michonne answered. “She died last night. I’m so sorry, Spencer.”

Spencer didn’t break down like they expected him to. “I know. I can’t find her body.”

Jason sighed. “I know where it is. I’ll go get it. You don’t want to see that.”

“She’s _my_ mother.” Spencer stressed as Jason started walking up the main street.

“I know, that’s why you don’t want to see it.” Jason called back before he walked out of hearing range.

After a couple of minutes he made it to the Anderson’s house and stepped inside. The windows and doors had all been broken in by the herd. As he looked around he tripped over one of the bodies that lay on the living room floor. He remembered it as one of the walkers he had killed when they had first broken in.

Jason made his way through to the staircase and stood in the hallway. He glanced over to the garage door that hung open. The garage had been where Ron had initially tried to kill Carl and because of some stupid sense of loyalty Jason had chosen not to tell Rick at the time. He should have. Or he should have taken care of Ron when he had the chance. If he had, Carl wouldn’t be lying in the infirmary half-dead.

Jason shook his head and slowly headed up the staircase. He entered the hallway where Sam’s bedroom door lay open, his drawings and toys scattered all over the floor. To his left was the room where they had gutted the walkers to use for camouflage, the two bodies still lying there with their torsos ripped open. Ahead of him on the corridor floor lay five dead walkers, all with gunshots to their heads. Jason smirked when he realised he had been right. Deanna had gone down fighting.

When he entered the bedroom where Deanna had been, he froze in confusion. There were two more bodies lying on the bedroom floor with their skulls crushed. A hockey stick that lay between them told him the story. Even after her gun had run empty, she had still tried to fight the herd. She had been one fierce women when she had stared death in the face. Jason’s eyes scanned the room but he couldn’t find her body. She wasn’t there anymore. There was no way she could have escaped the room so she must have died and turned.

Jason sighed and picked up Deanna’s revolver off the floor. With any luck her body would turn up in the piles outside so that Spencer could have a body to bury. Jason couldn’t imagine not being able to say some kind of goodbye to his own mother. He knew the torment Spencer would go through if Deanna wasn’t found. The noise of footsteps coming up the steps caught his attention as he placed a hand on the handle of his TRP Operator, which still sat in his thigh holster. The owner of the footsteps was Kent.

“Oh! I didn’t know anyone was in here.” Kent began, jumping slightly when he caught sight of Jason. “It’s Jason, right?”

Jason nodded. “Yeah. I’m sorry but I have no idea what your name is.”

“Kent, been here almost since the beginning.” Kent introduced himself, offering his hand to be shaken.

Jason shook Kent’s hand firmly but weaker than he usually would.

“I’ve got a trolley out front if you wanna help me get these bodies out of here?” Kent suggested, gesturing to the bodies lying at their feet.

“Sure thing, we can just toss them down the stairs from here.” Jason commented, grabbing the ankles of the closest corpse.

Kent moved round and grabbed the wrists of the same corpse so that they could swing the body and send it flying down the staircase. It landed with a sickening squishy crunch but it was better than carefully moving the bodies down the stairs one at a time.

“I hear all the kids survived last night thanks to you.” Kent commented as they tossed the second body down the stairs.

Jason shrugged his shoulders and grunted as he lifted the third. “Not all of them.”

“Hey, you helped.” Kent insisted, letting go of the corpse for a moment. “You saved lives. Accept it. Own it.”

“I was on a suicide mission last night.” Jason confessed. “It was Rick and the rest of you who saved this town. That’s where the credit lies.”

“You’re a hero in my eyes.” Kent told him as they tossed the third body down the stairs. “And I know a lot of people who are gonna want to mend broken bridges with you.”

Jason nodded and grabbed hold of the fourth body. He couldn’t accept the title of hero or the achievement of having saved lives. He couldn’t even save Carl like he had promised to on that very landing.

_Jason thought back to Kellin. His deceased soulmate would have struggled to face such a grim situation. He could imagine him even now, holding Jason’s hand tightly as he swallowed heavily, fearfully looking down at the herd. Kellin would have needed Jason by his side at all times to keep him safe and strong. It was a relief for Jason to know that Carl was different. Carl was a survivor just like everyone else in the group. Carl didn’t need the constant protection Jason felt obligated to provide. Carl was brave and could fight the dead and the living. He would survive this with Jason and the next day they’d be able to celebrate their survival and their love._

_“What?” Carl asked after Jason continued to silently stare._

_“I love you, Carl.” Jason replied with a wider smile. “And I promise I won’t let anything happen to you.”_

_“I love you too.” Carl replied, blushing because the others could hear. “And I won’t let anything happen to you either.”_

 

The sound of a lorry’s horn signalled the arrival of the convoy at the gates of Alexandria. Rick’s lorry led the convoy and was the first to pass through the gates before gradually turning itself around at the intersection so that it faced the gate again. Glenn, Daryl, Heath and Tobin parked up outside the gates before getting out of their cabins and heading in to help move the bodies.

Everyone who was there started moving the bodies into the back of the lorry after Rick had opened it. They created a system with two people inside the container and another two loading them in from outside. They quickly started stacking the bodies in the back of the container so that they could fit as many inside as possible. The key to this plan was speed and to reduce the number of trips to an absolute minimum.

The stench of death was even worse inside the lorry’s container but those inside just had to grit their teeth and bare it. The sooner they could get it done the sooner they could breathe fresh air again. As more people joined in on the lifting, the loading became much faster than before and it only took about twenty minutes for Rick’s container to be packed with over two hundred bodies.

Once the container was full, Rick drove it back out of the gates and with the extra space created by the removal of three whole body piles, both Daryl and Glenn were able to drive their lorries inside the gates. Just as they had done with Rick’s container, everyone started loading the bodies into the backs of the lorries as fast as they could while others brought more bodies down to them.

An hour later and they had filled all the lorries and trucks to capacity with walker bodies. It had been Eugene who had calculated their average load and how long it would take them. They were managing an average of eight hundred bodies per trip, which meant they needed to make ten whole trips back and forth from the quarry. They had a lot of work ahead of them.

Jason watched them set off as he brought the small pile of walkers down to the gate with Kent. They quickly unloaded the Anderson house bodies from their trolley before Kent set off to clear more of the houses. Jason stayed where he was for a few minutes to get his breath back and to will away the headache that was pounding his skull. He staggered over to where the wall had collapsed and observed how the clean-up and rebuild operation was going.

It didn’t take him long to spot Morgan struggling to lift a large panel of metal that had broken off the wall when the tower landed on it. He made his way over and grabbed hold of the panel at the opposite end from Morgan, smiling as the older man thanked him for the assistance. They worked together to load it onto the back of one of the pick-up trucks.

Once it was in the back of the truck, Jason leaned against the truck and held his forehead again. His muscles were still in total agony and his head was spinning and pounding. There was still work to do and he could rest later so he tried his best to will away the pain and dizziness.

“Hey, you okay?” Morgan asked him, noticing Jason’s lack of movement.

“I’m fine.” Jason mumbled before staggering and grabbing onto the truck for support.

“Hey, you need to take it easy.” Morgan told him, holding his shoulders to support him. “So sit down before you fall down.”

Jason heard Morgan but he couldn’t really make out what he had said. His vision was blurring and everything he heard was more of an echo than a solid sound. His breath came out in short pants and his whole body started to shake. His chest tightened, making it harder to breathe and he squeezed his eyes shut at the throbbing pain in his head.

When he opened his watering eyes again his surroundings had changed. He was standing on the pathway near the lake. The voices around him had changed to the snarls and growls of the dead and the sky above had darkened. In front of him, with their gun raised and their eyes filled with rage was Ron. Jason looked at him in horror before looking over his left shoulder to see Carl looking back in fear, both eyes wide open.

Jason pulled his gun out of his thigh holster and aimed it at Ron’s head. He kept his finger on the trigger as he challenged the younger teen to lower his gun. He wouldn’t let him shoot Carl. This time would be different. He would do what he should have done last time.

“Drop it!” Jason barked at the crazed teen in front of him.

“You…” Ron muttered lowly, placing his finger on the trigger. “…You…”

Jason stepped to the side and stood between Ron and Carl. He kept his gun aimed at Ron’s head and flicked the safety off. The snarls around them got louder along with distant screams. He could swear he had heard his name shouted in the distance but he ignored it. Ron was not going to shoot Carl this time. Jason was going to put things right. He squeezed the trigger and suddenly everything went black.

There were cries of confusion as Abraham stood over Jason’s unconscious form. He had seen the situation rapidly snowball from his perch on top of the truck. Jason had looked off-balance and unwell, then had some kind of panic attack before pulling his gun on an un-armed Morgan. Despite everyone’s best attempts to reason with the teen he had ignored them and was about to shoot. So Abraham did the only thing he could think of and smacked Jason in the back of the head with the butt of his rifle.

“What the hell happened to him?” Sasha asked from atop the truck.

“Shellshock!” Abraham called back. “Trauma’s making him crazier than a soup sandwich.”

Morgan bent down and started to lift Jason’s unconscious body while Aaron disarmed him. “I’ll take him to the infirmary.”

“I’ll come too.” Aaron added. “We don’t know what will happen when he wakes up.”

Morgan nodded in agreement and lifted Jason in a fireman’s carry before both men started making their way towards the infirmary. It had been a frightening few moments for Morgan as he didn’t have his staff on hand to knock Jason’s gun away. He had been completely at the mercy of the younger man’s hallucinations.

 

_Jason sat by Carl’s bedside. Outside it was dark and quiet as night had rolled in and everyone had retired for an early night after a hard day’s work. Denise and Tara had gone to bed an hour before. He held Carl’s cold hand and thought back to all the things they had been through. He now knew how Carl had felt when he was the one lying in the infirmary after his fight with Pete._

_Suddenly, Carl stirred in his sleep as his one good eye started to flutter open. Jason practically leapt to his feet as his lover wakened, a smile on his face so wide that it almost hurt. Carl’s grip on Jason’s hand tightened and then he made a sound that Jason didn’t want to hear. It was a snarl._

_Jason looked down in horror at Carl’s glazed over eye and finally noticed how cold his hand was. He had been so caught up in his own thoughts that he hadn’t even noticed Carl die. His whole body shook in terror as tears fell from his eyes. He pulled out of Carl’s grasp and backed away, shaking his head in disbelief as Carl crawled over the bed and fell to the wooden floor with a loud thud._

_“No…no…” Jason gasped out weakly, his lips quivering violently and his tears blurring his vision._

_Carl’s body rose to its feet clumsily before staggering towards him, mouth agape to display its sharp teeth as it snarled hungrily at the older teen. Jason backed up until he hit the wall and started to panic, feeling boxed in by the undead corpse of his boyfriend. This was his worst nightmare coming to life. He swallowed heavily. He knew what he had to do._

_Jason grabbed Carl by the neck as he flailed his arms in a desperate attempt to grab him or scratch him. Carl’s jaws clanged together constantly with each failed bite as Jason reached down for his gun and raised it up to Carl’s face. He slid the barrel of the gun into Carl’s mouth and stopped to stare at the horrific scene in front of him._

_Carl’s cold, pale lips rested on the barrel of Jason’s TRP Operator as he continued to growl hungrily at him. Those same lips that had once been warm and coloured with life. Jason could never forget the feeling of Carl’s lips on his own or the taste of Carl on his tongue. Carl tasted as he acted; sweet. It was a unique taste he would never have the pleasure of experiencing again. Nor would he ever feel Carl’s arms wrapped around him or hear his moans of pleasure as they made love._

_“I love you, Carl.” Jason sobbed out. “I know you’d do it for me, so, goodbye.”_

_Jason pulled the trigger. With a quick flash, a sudden spray of blood and a loud bang, Carl’s body fell limp against the older teen. Jason dropped to the floor with him, cradling his lifeless form as he continued to sob. He had been strong enough to continue without Kellin but he wasn’t strong enough to continue on without Carl. Jason knew everyone would understand eventually. He heard Denise and Tara rushing towards the room but before they could reach the door he stuck the gun under his own chin and pulled the trigger._

Jason’s eyes fluttered open as he was brought back to consciousness by hushed voices all around him. He squinted as the ceiling lights attacked his sensitive eyes and lifted his hand to shield them. When he did, he felt a new I.V drip in his arm and sighed. He was in the infirmary.

Jason looked around and found Aaron and Morgan standing by the door with all of his weapons sitting on the table next to them. Morgan had his staff in his hands as well. Denise obscured his view of them as she stood in front of him and shined a light into his eyes, forcing him to blink rapidly and turn away.

“What happened?” Jason asked, rather confused.

“The cut on your eyebrow got infected. You had a fever.” Denise told him as he touched the bandage on his eyebrow. “You hallucinated and tried to kill Morgan.”

Jason groaned and fell back on the bed with his hand on his forehead. “I had no idea, I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright.” Morgan responded calmly. “You’ve been through a lot. We all have.”

“I cleaned the wound and put you on some strong antibiotics.” Denise explained to him. “But your body still needs plenty of bed rest and you need to eat something.”

Jason sat back up and looked outside. The sky outside was a painting of dark red and dark yellow as the sun was setting. He rubbed the back of his neck as a sudden pain shot through it and coursed up to the back of his head.

“How long was I out?” He asked to no one in particular.

“About five hours.” Aaron answered. “Give or take. The funeral session will be starting soon.”

Jason nodded. “How’s Carl?”

“No change.” Denise told him. “And the rules still stand. Until you’ve rested you don’t get to see him.”

Jason sighed loudly but nodded. He knew there was no point in arguing with her since everyone else seemed to agree. He slowly swung his legs over the side of the bed and stood up, pulling the I.V drip out of his arm with a wince.

“Shower. Food. Rest.” Denise told him sternly. “In that order.”

Jason dismissed her with a wave of his hand. “Yeah, yeah. I heard.”

He made his way to the table where his weapons were but Morgan’s staff was raised between him and the table. Jason glared at the black man and then at Aaron who seemed to agree with this move.

“I’d like my weapons back.” He told them firmly.

“Until your fever passes we think it’s safer you stay unarmed for now.” Aaron told him. “Just for tonight.”

Jason wanted to argue but he couldn’t find the strength to do so. He simply sighed angrily and stormed past them, slamming the infirmary door shut behind him. He hated being the outcast.

 

Jason closed the front door of their house behind him. He let out a deep breath he didn’t know he had been holding as he walked into the front room. He felt so empty knowing that he wasn’t coming home to Carl and that he was only home because there was a funeral to go to. Movement caught his left eye as Rick and Michonne rose from where they had been sitting together on the couch.

Michonne closed the gap and hugged Jason. “You had us worried.”

“We heard what happened.” Rick commented. “You okay?”

Jason returned Michonne’s hug with surprising tightness. He didn’t know if she was a mind reader but hugs were what he really needed. He needed comfort and a reason to truly believe that Carl would recover. There was only so much he could take. Rick’s eyes met with his own and in that moment Jason felt like he was being looked at as a son instead of as the boyfriend of Rick’s son.

“No…I don’t think I am.” Jason stuttered out honestly.

Rick nodded slowly. It was the answer he had expected. “None of us are. But we’ll get through this together. We’re family.”

Jason nodded slowly as well. He didn’t want to add too much to the conversation as he could see that Rick was just as distraught as he was. He turned back to Michonne as she let go of him and broke the embrace they had been standing in.

“Get cleaned up and ready for the funeral.” Michonne told him. “You’ve got an hour.”

The teen nodded and made his way slowly up the stairs. He felt his legs shake and his lips quiver as he entered his bedroom. His and Carl’s bedroom. It was so quiet and spacious without Carl there. He was used to finding Carl lying back on the bed reading a book, or snuggled into the covers waiting to be joined.

Jason sat down on the bed and pulled his diary out of the bedside drawer. He opened it up and started writing down everything that had happened in the last day. The more he wrote, the faster the tears fell until he couldn’t write anymore. He remained on the bed, sobbing onto the floor as he held his necklace in one hand. It was supposed to have been his two month celebration with Carl. It was supposed to have been a happy day and a night of love. Instead, he was going to attend the funerals of several people while the life of his lover hanged in the balance.

Downstairs, Rick and Michonne sat back down on the couch as they waited for Jason to get ready. They watched Judith on the baby monitor as the sound of the shower being turned on filled the otherwise silent house.

“I’ve never seen him so fragile.” Michonne commented, referring to Jason.

“Carl is gonna wake up and when he does Jason will come back from this.” Rick told her optimistically. “He’s strong and he’ll make it. He has to.”

“We can’t completely ignore the other possibility, Rick.” Michonne added, hating that she had to be pragmatic all the time.

“I can’t think about that.” Rick admitted, his voice cracking ever so slightly. “Not right now.”

“He’s gonna make it.” Michonne reassured Rick, putting an arm around him.

 

An hour later everyone was gathered round the cemetery. The sky above them was dark and cloudy, befitting the miserable atmosphere inside Alexandria. All of the families and groups in Alexandria were either present or at least represented by some of their people at the funeral, as many of the children were kept home after what happened. Everyone in attendance was wearing their best clothes as a mark of respect to the dead as not everyone had formal black suits to wear.

The sky rumbled with the threat of thunder and lightning as everyone waited for Father Gabriel to begin. At previous gatherings Rick’s group had all stood together and the Alexandrians had done the same but this was the first time they all mixed together. They stood up straight with their hands clasped in front of them as they observed the wooden crosses that marked the graves with each name.

**Deanna Monroe**  
Jess Anderson  
Sam Anderson  
Ron Anderson  
Betsy Kraur  
Ted Brown  
Lucy Williams  
Pascal Balazs  
Maya Ashton

Jason found it hard to look at the graves when Carl continued to lie in the infirmary, potentially fading away more with each passing hour. He had no choice but to hold onto the same faith that Michonne and Rick seemed to have in the younger teen to pull through. Despite being surrounded by the community members while standing between Rick and Michonne, Jason felt very alone without Carl by his side. The sound of Gabriel clearing his throat brought him out of his reverie.

“Here in Alexandria we are a family and it is because we are a family that we are gathered here tonight so that we may say a loving goodbye to our dearly departed.” Gabriel began, his voice and the distant thunder being the only sounds that could be heard. “A couple days ago we lost our beloved Betsy Kraur, wife of David, because she couldn’t be apart from her soulmate. Last night, as we fought to save this town with the strength that God gave us, we lost another eight of our loved ones.”

There was nothing but respectful silence as Gabriel continued.

“It is difficult to celebrate any victory when the price is a void in our hearts that will never be filled. We all believed that there would be more time but there never seems to be enough time anymore.” Gabriel continued. “Deanna Monroe was one such person. She brought us all together and made this community work. It is hard to imagine Alexandria without her.”

Spencer felt awful as he stood and sobbed. The grave was there but Deanna’s body still hadn’t been found. He was crying out of guilt as much as grief as he remembered the terrible things he had said to his mother. They had turned out to be the last things he ever got to say to her and if he could he’d turn back time and change it all.

_Spencer finished pouring his drink and held up the glass._

_“So, why not me? I stopped that little run at the bank, I deserve a reward. One last celebration.” Spencer continued, turning to Deanna. “Cause they were right, mum, and you know it. We’re all gonna be dead real soon.”_

_Deanna glared at him, her disappointment giving way to frustration. “Dammit Spencer!”_

_“Me? Now that is some bullshit! You’re the reason we’re so screwed, you made us this way!” Spencer shouted back, slamming the empty glass down. “We were never safe here but you didn’t wanna see that! You didn’t want us to see that! You just wanted to dream! What happened to dad, to Aiden? That’s all you!”_

_Deanna reeled back in shock and grief. The wounds were still very raw and her earlier optimism had just been crushed by her angry son. Spencer was frozen on the spot, his expression softer as he realised that what he said hadn’t been completely true and was unfair given the circumstances. Despite this, he couldn’t muster the strength to apologise so he just walked away while Deanna packed away the stolen goods._

Rick felt the weight of responsibility fall on his shoulders. He hadn’t officially been made the leader of the community but Deanna had decided on it. She had been a fantastic leader and there was no question of that. However, faced with the threats presented by walkers and other people, the community needed a leader with more battle experience and knowledge to lead them. That leader had to be Rick Grimes, whether he wanted to be or not. He made a silent promise to treat everyone in the community like family, just as Deanna had told him to.

_“Rick!” Deanna beckoned him back over, pulling out some pieces of paper. “I wrote something for Spencer, for Maggie.”_

_Rick took the pieces of paper from her and pocketed them. “I’ll make sure they get them.”_

_“Will you look out for him?” Deanna asked the man beside her, resting her hand on one of his._

_“I will.” Rick replied, feeling tears stinging his eyes._

_“Will you look out for him like you look out for your people?” Deanna asked, referencing their conversation from before the tower fell._

_Rick stared down at her, feeling partly guilty for her not being able to properly say goodbye to her son. He also knew that he didn’t care about Spencer like he cared about his own family. It wouldn’t be right to make a promise he wasn’t going to keep._

_“Guess what?” Deanna challenged, sensing his inner conflict. “They’re all your people, Rick. They are.”_

_“We haven’t had a chance to make it that.” Rick countered. Deanna was still the leader, even now._

_“But that’s how it is.” Deanna retorted with a smile. “I didn’t run over to help you out there because I like you, or because I think you’re a good man, a good father, or that you can grow one hell of a beard.”_

_Rick couldn’t help but smirk in amusement at that final remark. It was one of the first and few amusing conversations they had when he shaved the beard off completely. Everyone had passed some kind of comment._

_“I ran over to help because you are one of us.” Deanna finished with a wise smirk. “That’s the right answer.”_

Michonne had respected Deanna and was always impressed by her strength and leadership. Much like Michonne, she was very good at reading people and the questions she had given to Michonne were some of the most important questions anyone had ever asked her. She had promised Deanna that she would find the answers and make Alexandria work, she fully intended to keep that promise.

_“I’m lucky, Michonne. Working with my family towards a better future is all I ever wanted.” Deanna explained with a weak smile as she reflected on her life. “That’s what I got. I got to do what I wanted right up to the end.”_

_Michonne felt her lip quiver as she listened to Deanna. Despite the positivity Deanna was radiating, it felt all the more tragic. Spencer was the only family that Deanna had left and because of the walkers, he wasn’t going to be at his mother’s bed side as she died. Her son wasn’t going to get to say goodbye. It wasn’t fair._

_“What do you want?” Deanna asked the samurai._

_“I want this place to work.” Michonne answered firmly._

_“Yes, but what does that mean for you?” Deanna pressed. It was a deeply personal question. “What do you want for you?”_

_Michonne thought for a moment. She had never stopped to consider what she wanted from life.  “I don’t know.”_

_“You better.” Deanna told her, not wanting the samurai to die with regrets._

Jason was grateful that he had been able to make amends with Deanna before her death. They had been at one another’s throats for practically the entire duration of his stay in Alexandria. He knew that deep down there had been nothing malicious about it, they were just similar people with completely different views of the world. Who was right and who was wrong no longer mattered, what mattered was that they ended things on good terms.

_Jason sat down where Michonne had been seated and took Deanna’s hand in his own. “Hey.”_

_“Hey.” Deanna croaked in response._

_Jason hesitated for a few moments. “I wanted to apologise for before. I was pretty horrible to you, more than once.”_

_“Forget it.” Deanna answered with a small shake of her head. “It’s water under the bridge or over the dam or wherever you like to put it.”_

_“I’m still sorry.” Jason pressed, squeezing her hand gently._

_Deanna stared at him for a few seconds before smiling weakly. “Apology accepted.”_

_Jason nodded, swallowing heavily. “I also wanted to thank you for this place and for letting us in. It’s because of you that Carl and I have had so much quality time together. We wouldn’t have had that out there.”_

_“It wasn’t just me.” Deanna countered gently. Her husband and many others deserved credit._

_“No but you were in charge. You were what kept this place together.” Jason told her. “I’m not sure how we’re going to manage without you.”_

_“As flattering as it is, that’s bullshit.” Deanna replied with a smile. “You’ll all make this place better, safer than I ever could.”_

_Jason nodded as he reflected. “When I blackmailed you, you could have stopped me. You could have fought back. Why didn’t you?”_

_“Because despite our differences I knew then, as I knew when I met you and as I know now, that you are a noble young man.” Deanna answered, taking her time with such a long sentence._

_“I wouldn’t say I’m noble.” Jason chuckled incredulously. “Far from it, actually.”_

_“You are. You’ve always been honest with me.” Deanna answered before challenging him. “So, be honest with me now. Will Alexandria survive this?”_

_Jason smiled and nodded. “Yeah, it will. We’ll survive and rebuild.” Jason smiled as he nodded. “We’ll make this place better and safer. I’ll see to it personally. For you.”_

_Deanna squeezed Jason’s hand and shook her head. “Don’t do it for me. Do it for your family. For Carl. For Judith. Promise me.”_

_Jason nodded slowly. “I promise.”_

_“Good.” Deanna smiled and let go of his hand._

As Gabriel began to talk about Jessie, Rick found the ache in his heart grow and spread like a cancer. He had been immediately attracted to her from the moment he saw her, standing at the front door with a basket of household supplies. There was an optimism to her that he had found cute and an underlying strength he had found seductive. He quickly found himself caring about her more than usual and had set out to kill her husband so that she would be safe. Unfortunately, he hadn’t been able to keep her safe after her youngest son was killed. The world was cruel and the pain was sickening. However, Rick was still glad that he had spent some time with her before it all fell apart around him.

_Jessie nodded in understanding. “You said it could go on a while.”_

_“I did.” Rick agreed. “And it could.”_

_“Rick, it already has. They could still be alive.” Jessie told him optimistically. “We’re not moving past that, it’s just, right here, in this moment, this is it. This is what it is.”_

_“This is what life looks like now.” Rick rasped in response._

_“You heard about that?” Jessie questioning rhetorically._

_Rick nodded, taking a step forward._

_“I wasn’t saying there wasn’t a future.” Jessie explained. “There’s gotta be.”_

_Rick stared at her in silence. He had the desire to make a move, to finally do what he had been wanting to do since before he fought Pete. Jessie’s husband wasn’t a problem anymore and they had gotten closer over the last few days._

_“Tell me there’s more.” Jessie asked of him._

_Rick didn’t say anything. He took another couple tentative steps forward, caressed her cheek with his hand before leaning in and kissing her. Jessie was surprised at first but found pleasure shooting through her. She couldn’t remember the last time someone had kissed her as gently and as passionately as Rick was kissing her in that moment. She returned the kiss, allowing their tongues to duel as Rick pulled her closer to him while her hands roamed his muscular back._

_They both needed this. This is what their future could be. This was what life could be. This was more._

Michonne glanced at Jason and observed him grinding his teeth in an effort to repress his anger and hatred as Gabriel spoke about Ron. Earlier in the day she had lied for him to Maggie and Aaron who had questioned the disfigurement of Ron’s face. She explained it away as a desperate kill wound that had stabbed apart Ron’s right eye. She knew different. Jason had done that in a fit of vengeful rage long after Ron had died. It was hard for the samurai to see Rick and Jason in so much emotional turmoil over Carl’s condition. She was terrified for her youngest friend as well but she also felt responsible for his injury. Had she killed Ron differently then the bullet may never have struck Carl’s eye.

_The click of a gun safety was enough to make both teens spin around on the spot. Carl’s eyes widened in shock when he saw that his Beretta was now in Ron’s hands and was being aimed directly at Rick. Ron’s eyes were cold. The mixture of stress and shock was too much and he was in an even worse state than he had been in the garage. Jason quickly pulled out his Operator and aimed it at Ron’s head._

_“You…” Ron gasped out, glaring at Rick._

_Rick was the man who had killed his father. Rick was the man who had led his family out into the herd to die. Rick was the man who had killed his entire family, just like he knew he would. Rick was going to die for what he had done. Then Carl would die for taking Enid from him. Then Jason would die as well. They would all die._

_“Put it down or I’ll kill you.” Jason hissed. “I don’t care if every walker hears it.”_

_“You.” Ron wasn’t listening. He didn’t care. He squeezed the trigger._

_Jason was about to shoot him when suddenly Michonne’s sword erupted out of Ron’s chest. She knew he was going to pull the trigger and couldn’t let it happen. Ron’s eyes widened as his arms and legs splayed apart. His finger pulled the trigger and fired the gun but the bullet missed its target. Jason holstered his gun as Ron’s body fell to the ground. Rick nodded to Michonne in gratitude as they all let out a sigh of relief. It was over. They were okay._

_Jason turned to check on Carl and make sure he was okay after seeing his friend die in front of him. He froze when he saw blood trickling down Carl’s cheek from under his hat. Rick noticed Jason’s horrified expression and turned to look at his son. He too saw the blood running down Carl’s cheek as the teen lifted his head and looked at his father. More blood poured from the hole where his right eye used to be. The bullet had struck his eye socket._

_“Dad?” Carl gasped out weakly before collapsing on the ground._

Enid found herself crying for the first time in months. The last time she had cried was when her parents had been eaten in front of her. Now she found herself crying over Ron’s death and how she had lost him. She had cared about him but he was too soft and inexperienced to understand her. She had abandoned him after the Wolves attacked and as a result she never got to see him again. She understood what Glenn had meant.

_Enid and Glenn looked on in horror as the tower collapsed and smashed the wall down. The walker herd that was several thousand strong started flooding into Alexandria with no way of stopping them. While Glenn tried to work out the best way to help, Enid found herself frozen on the spot._

_“This is how it happens and it always happens, Glenn.” Enid told him pessimistically._

_“We’re still here, our friends are in there, people who care about you.” Glenn argued with her. “My pregnant wife.”_

_She turned to the Asian man in horror. His wife was pregnant and was now trapped inside the town with thousands of walkers. He could be about to lose his wife and unborn child yet he wasn’t crumbling. He was standing strong and preparing to fight. She couldn’t understand it. There was no hope for anyone in Alexandria. No hope for Ron, for Olivia, for Carl or for Glenn’s wife._

_“You just gonna run away? Be afraid? Forget about this?” Glenn challenged her angrily. “Just go. But that’s how you lose people even after they’re gone.”_

_Enid watched as Glenn walked away from her with every intention of saving his wife and everyone inside the walls. It was easier to run away but it was harder to live with yourself afterwards. That’s why he never gave up and it was why she shouldn’t either._

Not far away from Enid was Mikey. He stood mostly on his own, shaking as he sobbed at the loss of his best friend, Ron. His hair was much longer than it had been before as he had turned into a recluse since his father died. He was evidently not coping well and something would need to be done to help him.

Carol sighed as she struggled to fight back the tears that threatened to fall. Ever since she had lost her beautiful daughter who had been too timid and kind for the apocalyptic world, she had made it her mission to prevent it ever happening again. She had taught the children in the prison how to use knives and defend themselves but most of them were killed during the Governor’s attack or by walkers in the aftermath. Lizzy and Mika had survived until Mika was killed by her older sister. Mika had been like Sophia, far too gentle and Lizzy had been mentally unstable. One of the hardest things Carol had ever done was kill Lizzy.

When she had reached Alexandria and had been approached by Sam, another kind, gentle and extremely innocent child, she had feared for his safety. Initially she had tried to push him away in the hopes that he’d never become her problem but her better nature got the upper hand. She had done her best to toughen him up but Jessie had been a weak mother in Carol’s eyes. That’s what got Sam killed in the end. Now, Carl was lying near death’s door. Was he going to be the next child in her life to die despite being the only one who learned how to survive? Carol couldn’t bear the thought of it.

_Sam did as he was told, wiping the mess from the counter with the cloth. “Did you like it? Cooking? You know, before?”_

_“Sam.” Carol repeated, silently reminding him that they weren’t talking._

_“We don’t have to be friends, it just doesn’t have to be quiet.” Sam retorted with a sigh._

_Carol thought for a moment. Perhaps she was being too harsh and cold towards the boy when he hadn’t actually done anything wrong. He knew about the stolen guns but not all loyalty had to be bought through intimidation and fear._

_“I was good at it.” Carol explained. “It distracted me, it made me forget when I was sad.”_

_“Sometimes when I get sad I break stuff.” Sam admitted as he continued cleaning._

_“What kind of stuff?” Carol asked him, suddenly suspicious._

_Sam simply shrugged. He didn’t want to go into specifics._

_“You said someone broke your owl statue.” Carol recalled. “Did you break it?”_

_Sam thought for a moment before guiltily closing his eyes and nodding._

_“Why?” Carol continued. “Why are you here?”_

_“Why’d you steal the guns?” Sam shot back._

_“Because sometimes you need to protect yourself.” Carol answered bluntly._

_“Can I have a gun?” Sam asked after a pause for thought._

_“Why do you want one?” Carol asked calmly, making sure not to adversely react._

_Sam shrugged. “It’s not for me.”_

_“Who is it for?” Carol asked sharply but received no answer. “Sam, who is it for?”_

_Under Carol’s intense gaze and with the creeping fear of reprisal should he answer her question, Sam lost his nerve and ran out of the house. He ran too fast to hear Carol calling after him._

After Gabriel had spoken about the remaining Alexandrians who had died during the walker invasion, he opened a book he had found in one of the houses. It was a book of poetry and one poem had stood out to him as a more perfect ending to the funeral than a regular bible verse that everyone would have heard by now.

“Death is not the end,  
For love goes on  
And you will find the evidence  
Long after I have gone.  
The flowers that we planted  
Will blossom without end,  
You’ll find me in their beauty  
As to their needs you tend.  
The books we read together,  
The laughter in the pages,  
Will continue to give pleasure  
To you throughout the ages.  
So do not mourn my passing  
You are not left alone,  
You’ll always find me waiting  
In the places we have known.  
The bond that grew between us  
Will not abate with time,  
It will go on for always,  
I’m yours and you are mine.”

Once the funeral had ended and everyone had said their piece, the crowd dispersed as everyone slowly made their way home. It was dark and there was a chill in the air from the storm brewing above, never forgotten because of its grumbling reminders of thunder. Spencer was one of the few who didn’t leave right away, opting to stay by his mother’s grave a little longer. He wasn’t alone, as Mikey did the same at Ron’s grave.

Rick walked in between Jason and Michonne, his arms against each of their backs as he guided them back to the house. They had all had a long day and they had a lot to think about and process. They were all worried about Carl but they all knew there was nothing to be done except wait. Jason twirled his necklace between his fingers as he silently prayed that Carl’s funeral wouldn’t be the next one he would be attending.

As they closed in on the house, Jason realised how much they felt like a family with the way they were walking. The picture was missing the most important piece, however. Carl. They were soon joined by Daryl and then Morgan. No one said anything right away because there was nothing that needed to be said that hadn’t been said already.

 

“They’ve changed. They’re ready.” Rick commented over the dinner table to everyone.

The clang of cutlery against plates rang out at the dining table in the house as Rick, Michonne, Jason, Carol, Morgan and Daryl had dinner together. Carol had cooked them a large meal of a vegetarian Bolognese, as they had limited access to meat. A family meal together seemed fitting after the morbid evening they had all had.

“To handle walkers, not people.” Carol countered from the other side of the dinner table.

They were currently discussing the change in the Alexandrians that they had witnessed when they took the community back from the dead. They had all had similar feelings about the Alexandrians when they first arrived but they had changed their minds after what they saw that night.

Morgan wanted to say his piece about not needing to kill people but he kept his mouth shut. He was nervous around Carol as nothing had been said about what happened in the cell with the Wolf. He didn’t know if she was holding it as a trump card or was simply not mentioning it because she didn’t feel she needed to. Morgan knew Rick and the others would be furious if they found out about what happened in the cell, especially the fight between him and Carol.

“It’s a start. They’ve shown they can change.” Michonne added. “It’s easier to kill walkers than people.”

Jason thought about her comment. It was very true for different reasons and yet all it made him think about was his inability to kill Ron. He killed undead Ron with ease, but the living and more dangerous Ron had been allowed to live despite Jason’s desire to kill him. His gut instinct had been to kill him and he had ignored it.

“We’ll train them.” Rick suggested. “Teach them how to fight and how to defend this place against anything.”

Jason drowned out the discussion as he looked to his right at Judith’s cot. She was sleeping peacefully after having been fed by Michonne before dinner was ready. He smiled, it must have been a Grimes family trait to look so peaceful when asleep. Judith was fortunate enough to be too young and innocent to even notice her big brother’s absence for the time being. She was lucky.

Jason kept thinking back to that night, trying to work out what he could have done differently. When it would have been an appropriate time to act and deal with Ron. Should he have just shot Ron as soon as he pulled the gun on Rick? Should he have told Rick and the others about the fight Ron and Carl had in the garage? Perhaps he should have simply left Ron to head home on his own during the Wolves’ attack. He would have most likely died. The only other way things would have been changed was if Rick had allowed him to go outside the walls and lead the herd away. If he had done that then maybe Carl wouldn’t have gotten hurt.

“Excuse me.” Jason politely announced to them as he finished his plate.

He didn’t wait for any approval. He got up and left the table, heading up the stairs towards his and Carl’s bedroom. He didn’t want to create a scene at the dinner table so it was easier to be absent than it was to contain his emotions. Jason entered the bedroom and climbed out the window as he and Carl had done many times. He sat down on the roof and looked up at the clouds, the rumble of thunder still echoing across the sky. In the far distance he could see the brief but bright flashes of lightning.

“He’s taking it hard.” Rick commented to them. They all understood.

“We all are.” Carol replied between mouthfuls. “We’ve watched Carl grow up.”

“Yeah but this is different.” Rick thought aloud. “I don’t think Lori and I were ever that close.”

“Carl and Jason have been glued together since the day they met.” Michonne commented with a smile. “And they always will be.”

“A relationship like that is special.” Morgan added. “But difficult with things being how they are.”

“They’re two of the strongest people in this group.” Carol commented. “Maybe even the strongest. They’ll manage.”

Suddenly Daryl was the next one to stand up. He didn’t say anything to anyone and just left the table to head for the stairs. He thundered up them and checked the bedroom. He didn’t see Jason and would have checked the other rooms until he noticed the open window. Daryl slowly made his way to the window and peered outside it until he spotted Jason sitting on the roof with his legs crossed.

Daryl climbed out the window and sat down next to him. Jason glanced at him but the archer said nothing. He pulled out a packet of cigarettes and held it out as an offer but Jason refused with a wave of his hand. Daryl shrugged and pulled one out, sticking it in his mouth before putting the packet away and lighting the cigarette. He let out the first relaxing puff and leaned back, holding himself up with his outstretched arms.

“You need to get your shit together, man.” Daryl gruffly declared, turning to look at the younger man.

“I can’t. I promised to keep him safe and I broke that promise.” Jason replied, his lips quivering again.

“Hey, shit happens.” Daryl argued, annoyed by his weakness. “It ain’t your damn fault and he knows that.”

“I could have done things differently, Daryl.” Jason hissed back in frustration. “I could have killed Ron or…”

“Stop! Whatever happened, happened.” Daryl countered with another puff of his cigarette. “Just gotta accept it.”

“I don’t want to.” Jason muttered in defeat as he lay back to look up at the clouds.

“Don’t matter what you want.” Daryl replied before adding optimistically. “Carl’s one tough son of a bitch.”

Jason couldn’t help the smirk that tugged at the corner of his mouth. “Yeah, he is. You mind sparing another smoke?”

Daryl reached into his pocket and pulled one out of the pack, handing it to Jason. Jason stuck it between his lips and lit the end before passing the lighter back to Daryl. On his first breath of it Jason spluttered and coughed in disgust. He had never smoked before and had vowed to never smoke but with how hopeless he felt the rules no longer seemed to matter. The second puff was a little more pleasant as he allowed himself to lean back again.

“I’ve been lucky, Daryl. That’s my problem.” Jason said, relaxing a bit as the nicotine hit his system for the first time in his life. “I’ve had a love of my life before and after the apocalypse. Kinda appropriate in a morbidly ironic way.”

“Family ain’t about blood anymore.” Daryl commented. After his brother died the group became his family.

“Yeah.” Jason rasped back after another puff. “I hope you meet someone special. You deserve it more than I ever did.”

“Nah, I’m fine.” Daryl dismissed the mere notion of a love life for him.

Jason snorted incredulously. “You say that now because you’ve never felt it.”

“Don’t need to.” Daryl answered curtly.

“Whatever.” Jason responded with a shrug. “You know, I’d give you that hug you need but I’m pretty sure you’d stab me.”

Jason laughed at his own remark after blowing out another mouthful of smoke into the air above him. He knew what Daryl was like. Loyal, strong, deeply caring but also deeply damaged. Daryl didn’t do affection. Jason found it amusing to toy with that from time to time.

The two men fell into a comfortable silence as they lay back on the roof smoking cigarettes together. It was rare for them to spend any time together to bond that wasn’t part of a supply run or simply being on the road. Jason actually preferred the silence to an extent. Everyone was trying to counsel him and it quickly became tiresome. He let himself lower his guard a little as the silence covered them.

 

Denise walked out of the room after checking on Carl. It was early morning and he had survived the night in a stable condition, though there had been no change. Outside, the birds tweeted their morning chorus as she sat down on the sofa in the other room. A few moments later a pair of arms wrapped themselves gently around his neck before a pair of lips were placed softly against her cheek.

“Morning.” Tara greeted groggily.

“Hey.” Denise returned the greeting, turning her head to kiss Tara properly.

“How’s Carl?” Tara asked as she sat down next to her girlfriend.

Denise sighed. “No change, but at least he’s not any worse.”

Tara smiled and scooted herself closer to Denise, snuggling into her like a kitten and resting her head on Denise’s shoulder. Denise rested her own ahead against Tara and couldn’t help the smile that crossed her lips as they enjoyed the quietness of the morning together.

 

Michonne yawned as she entered the upstairs landing. She had just had a refreshing morning shower and had gotten dressed for the day. At the end of the hall, Jason and Carl’s bedroom door was still shut which meant Jason was still asleep. She knew he hadn’t been well but it was still odd to not see him up and around early in the morning.

The sound of Judith’s morning cry beckoned her back into the bedroom. Michonne lifted the baby up in her arms and kissed her forehead before heading down the stairs with her. When she reached the front room she found Rick sitting at the dining table eating a small breakfast before he started the day. There was still a lot of work that needed to be done in Alexandria.

“Morning.” Michonne greeted with a wide smile as Judith cooed at the sight of her dad.

“Morning.” Rick repeated and smiled back.

Rick took a moment to take in the sight before him. A freshly showered, cleanly dressed Michonne holding his baby daughter with a mother’s experience. She was a strong, caring yet independent woman that he could always rely on. Michonne was one of the closest people to him and one of the most trusted as well. A home life with her acting as the mother of his child was an endearing image.

“What?” Michonne asked, breaking him out of his thoughts.

Rick smiled nervously at being caught staring. “You know, she’s probably gonna start calling you mum.”

“That’s fine with me.” Michonne answered, keeping the same grin on her face as she sat down to bottle feed Judith.

 

Abraham made his way down to the main gate. Despite the smirk on his face put there by morning love with Rosita, he felt deflated at the prospect of standing guard for hours again. He was a soldier and it was his duty but keeping watch was always easier when he was with Sasha. He couldn’t deny it was because he appreciated her company and wanted to make it a regular thing. Standing guard with Spencer was not going to be remotely as stimulating as it was with Sasha.

“Abraham!” Tobin’s voice interrupted his thoughts. “Where you going?”

“The lookout.” Abraham answered, straightening up with his rifle in hand. “Someone’s gotta make sure those undead pricks don’t exploit the gaping chasm in our defences and have us for a quiet Sunday lunch.”

“I see.” Tobin rubbed the back of his head. “I was hoping you could come with me and some others to the blockade. We still have wall panels and vehicles there we can use.”

Abraham knew his job for the day was to stand watch but Tobin’s plan sounded far more interesting. It would be even more interesting if Sasha was going to take part as well.

He nodded. “Let’s do it. Someone else can pull the cobwebs out their ass and stand watch while we’re gone.”

“Great, I’ll get the others.” Tobin responded and headed off in search of a few more people who could spare the time to help.

 

Rick entered the armoury, heading past the room which housed all their guns and ammunition as he made his way to the pantry. He needed to make a mental list of things they were running low on for future supply runs. Ammunition would be near the bottom of the list below water, food and medicine.

The shelves of the pantry were still fairly well stocked although they were running low on some of the more preferred ingredients and foods. In their house they were lucky to have Carol, who was the kind of genius with food you’d expect to see winning a television cooking contest. Rick smirked at the image of the battle hardened Carol being shouted at by someone like Gordon Ramsay.

The unmistakable clang of an empty bottle against the hard floor brought him out of his thoughts. The former sheriff made his way to the back of the pantry to find the source of the clang and eventually found a body slumped against a shelf. Scattered on the floor were several empty bottles of different kinds of alcohol. Rick turned the corner and identified the body as Jason.

“When did you get up?” Rick asked, walking round to stand in front of him.

“I didn’t.” Jason slurred out. He had never gone to bed.

Rick’s eyes scanned the empty bottles. “How much have you had?”

“No pink elephants yet so not enough.” Jason rasped as he finished the bottle in his hand.

Rick felt an almost fatherly anger towards the young man. He watched as Jason struggled to his feet, knocking tins off the shelves as he stumbled around with terrible balance. He knew Jason was worried about Carl but this was a totally irresponsible way to deal with it that he would never have expected from Jason. Yet here he was, stumbling over empty bottles in the pantry completely blitzed out of his skull.

“I think you’ve had enough.” Rick hissed, a little more aggressively than he had intended.

“Don’t care what you think.” Jason hissed back as he reached for another bottle.

Rick looked around, considering his options before deciding that he couldn’t let Jason keep drinking. People were counting on them both and they couldn’t waste time with petty arguments and drunken stupidity. He marched forward and pulled the bottle out of Jason’s hands before the teen could open it.

“Give that back!” Jason barked, his speech slurring.

“You’ve had enough.” Rick repeated, louder than he had before. “Carl wouldn’t want to see you like this.”

“Oh, that’s fucking cheap, Rick!” Jason spat back angrily, squaring up to the man. “Considering it’s your fault he’s probably never gonna see anything again!”

“What?” Rick challenged, scrunching his face in confusion at the accusation. He’d die for Carl and Jason knew that.

“Fuck off, Rick! The great leader who didn’t even want to come here in the first place.” Jason spat. “But boy did that fucking change once you clamped eyes on Jessie. You were ready to move in with her!”

“Jason…” Rick growled as an early warning.

Rick was still struggling with Jessie’s death. He had cared about her, loved her and had fought to keep her safe. He had tried his best to protect her but he had failed. The guilt tore him up inside and Jason was now prodding the wound.

“That’s why you tried to save her from Pete. Don’t piss me about with the heroism. You only cared because you wanted to fuck her!” Jason continued his drunken rant. “Sure, Pete had to die, I’d have killed him myself but you killed him over a weak woman.”

Rick glared back at him. It was getting harder and harder for Rick to just listen to the insults. He grit his teeth and titled his head. He cared about Jason and trusted him but right now the teen was pushing his luck.

“Jessie was weak. She couldn’t leave that alky bastard so no wonder Ron was fucked in the head!” Jason spat and slurred. “Because of her Sam was made of fucking jelly. She didn’t even try to change him, just let him sit in his room and draw fucking daffodils.”

“Jason…” Rick repeated louder than before, his patience wearing thin.

“Then you wouldn’t let me lead the herd away from the gates. My plan would have worked, Rick. It fucking would have and we both know it but you were so hell-bent on being right that you wouldn’t let me.” Jason continued, the veins in his neck practically popping. “And what fucking happened? The herd got in and because of Jessie’s shit parenting your escape plan fell apart and Carl got shot!”

Rick glared at him. Many of these things had been completely out of his control and it wasn’t fair to blame them on him.

“Your son got shot and is lying in the infirmary and where are you? You’re out trying to solve everyone else’s fucking problems! You don’t need to be in charge every fucking second of every fucking day!” Jason barked and spat. “You should be at Carl’s bedside. Your son is fucking dying, Rick! He’s fucking dying and you’re not there!”

Rick felt the tension in his throat at the thought of Carl dying. As good a job as Deanna had done it was possible that Jason was right. Rick had so many responsibilities he often forgot that his responsibility as a father should always come first. He relaxed his anger just a little as he finally understood where all of Jason’s anger was coming from.

“Come on, let’s go see Carl.” Rick suggested, trying to defuse the situation.

As soon as Rick approached to try and help Jason walk, the teen shoved him back with both hands.

“Fuck off, Rick!” Jason hissed. “You’re not fucking listening!”

“I think you need to calm down.” Rick tried to reason with him, stepping forward again.

“I said fuck off!” Jason bellowed.

Rick was about to begin another sentence in an effort to calm Jason down when Jason’s fist swung round and struck him in the jaw. His head whipped round from the force of the strike as his head spun from the momentary shock at what just happened.

Rick turned his head back around, his patience finally running out. “You better stop!”

As soon as Rick finished speaking Jason lunged forward again for another angry punch. Rick side stepped this one and pushed Jason away from him, knocking the drunken teen even more off balance than he already was. Rick waited a second to see what Jason would do and growled angrily when Jason turned back to continue his attack. Rick grabbed Jason’s arm, catching the punch before delivering a powerful right hook of his own.

Jason’s head whipped back at the force of Rick’s punch as he stumbled back, tripping over his own intoxicated feet before smashing into one of the shelves. Cans and jars crashed to the floor as Jason’s body broke several panels before collapsing to the floor in an unconscious heap. Rick rubbed his bleeding knuckles, the skin having torn from how hard he angrily hit Jason and tried to slow his breathing. This couldn’t be allowed to go on, irrespective of how Jason felt about Carl.

“Rick!” Daryl’s voice called as he thundered down the hall. “You alright?”

Rick nodded slowly before nodding his head towards Jason’s unconscious form. “Help me get him to the infirmary.”

 

Michonne sat out on the porch of their house with Judith in her stroller. She looked down to the gate where Tobin, Abraham, Heath and some others were returning with various vehicles and the metal wall panels from the herding roadblock. Michonne looked back down at the plans spread out in front of her. They were Deanna’s expansion plans for Alexandria and they could certainly work.

She knew it would take time, of course but all good things did. Since everyone was so focused on repairing the wall it made sense to keep the construction crew busy and have them move on to the expansion afterwards. Michonne cast her mind back to what Deanna had said. She needed to figure out what she wanted from life but it was a difficult thing to do. Michonne had been so focused on surviving that the idea of living the life that she wanted had always seemed like a pipedream.

The more Michonne considered it the more she realised she already had most of the things she could ever want. She had a home, she had a place where she could relax and be safe from the horrors outside. The most important thing was that she had a surrogate family in Rick, Carl, Judith and Jason. What more could she possibly want that would make her life any better than it already was? She did miss having a lover and all the fun that went with it, often catching herself being jealous of Carl and Jason or previously Rick with Jessie.

As Judith woke up and cried for food and attention, Michonne smirked and rolled the plans back up. Her thoughts and plans for a happy future of fun and romance would have to be put on hold for now. Judith was more important.

 

_Rain pelted the window as the thunderstorm raged outside. Bright flashes of lightning illuminated the sky as loud crashes of thunder echoed through the dark clouds. The night was made even darker by the thick cloud cover the storm provided. The humid air and torrential rain didn’t matter to Jason, however, as he was in his room enjoying the company of his lover._

_His father was working all night and his mother was seeing family in Atlanta, allowing Jason to have control of the house. Having control of the house meant having his boyfriend over for some quality time together that wouldn’t be interrupted. As usual, his lover had come to the club to see The White Tigers, the band Jason and his friends Harry, Ryan and Sam had formed, perform some of their songs along with covers of their favourites._

_A few hours later and he was now bouncing to the beat of music in his chair as he and his boyfriend played against each other on a videogame. They were playing one of the Street Fighter games and were having a good laugh as they tried to outplay one another. Their characters were drastically different but the matchup was still well balanced, which was the beauty of the game in question. The two of them sang along to the music Jason had playing out of his computer speakers from his iTunes._

_“_ _I hate to see you fall down. I'll pick you up off of the ground.” Jason sang with the same voice he’d use for the band. “I've watched the weight of your world come down.”_

_He turned to his boyfriend to let him sing the next bit. He took the moment to admire him and how content he looked to be with Jason, which meant a lot even if they were goofing around and singing along to Three Days Grace. Jason always felt lucky when he looked at Carl and remembered that they were actually together. He looked perfect as he sat next to him dressed in torn black skinny jeans and a light grey hoodie, his dark hair reaching his shoulders._

_“_ _And now it's your chance to move on. Change the way you've lived for so long.” Carl sang, though not as confidently as Jason could. “You find the strength you've had inside all along.”_

_Jason grinned, finding himself envious of Carl even though his fashion style wasn’t dissimilar. He wore dark blue skinny jeans and a black t-shirt that clung to him tightly. He knew Carl was always blown away by him but he couldn’t see it himself, not that it really mattered. Carl grinned back as they reached the chorus of the song._

_“_ _Cause life starts now. You've done all the things that could kill you somehow.” They sang together loudly as Jason laced his fingers between Carl’s. “And you're so far down. But you will survive it somehow because life starts now.”_

_Jason pulled him in for a brief kiss which quickly changed into something deeper and more passionate. The slightly older teen smiled into the kiss as one of his hands trailed down from Carl’s neck, down his chest and abdomen until it reached the front of his skinny jeans. Carl gasped slightly and Jason let out a moan of approval when he felt the twitch against his palm._

_“How about we stop gaming for now and just play with each other?” Jason suggested, whispering it into Carl’s ear._

_“Yeah.” Carl breathed out as he felt his face heating up._

_Jason smirked and pulled away. He got out of the chair and turned off the game console and television. He moved the stand both items were placed on so they would have more space in the room, even if it was more space for discarded clothes. Once everything was in place he turned back to Carl._

_“So, ready baby?” Jason asked before he felt his blood run cold._

_Carl stood in the middle of the room, dressed the same way but there was now a hideous wound where his right eye used to be. Blood poured from the shattered eye socket, bone fragments sticking out at disgusting angles as Carl’s face turned pale._

_“Jason?” He gasped out before collapsing to the floor._

Jason sat up as he violently woke up. His eyes scanned his surroundings, searching for Carl before realising that he wasn’t in his bedroom and there was silence instead of music. He calmed down. It had just been a nightmare. Even so, he couldn’t get the terrifying image of Carl’s bleeding eye socket out of his mind. He observed the walls. Plaster walls and no windows. He was in the holding cell. A soft tug on his arm brought his attention to the IV bag that was stuck in his arm. Another one. Jason sighed and leaned back with his other hand over his face.

“Good morning.” A voice sounded from the doorway as some sunlight streamed in.

Jason squinted as his eyes were assaulted by the intense light, making it impossible to see who it was until they closed and locked the door. Morgan. The dark skinned man entered the room with his staff in hand and sat down on a chair.

“Morning?” Jason responded, slightly confused. “How long was I out?”

Morgan rested his staff against the wall and observed Jason. “Over a day. Rick and Daryl brought you in here.”

Jason stared back, still confused as his eyes fought to stay open. He still felt half asleep and his confusion wasn’t helping. He touched the back of his head, which ached with a dull thud and then felt the plasters on his face and eyebrow. He remembered small flashes of an argument with Rick but all of it was blurring together.

“Why?” Jason asked, still confused. “I’m not a threat to anyone.”

“You attacked Rick. You were drunk.” Morgan quickly told him. “Denise patched you up and they brought you here, just in case.”

Jason held his forehead in his hand before pulling the IV out of his arm, wincing at the small sting of pain. He slowly got to his feet with unsteady footing before looking at the door to the cell.

“I need to check on Carl.” Jason announced and took the first step towards the door.

“I can’t let you go just yet.” Morgan answered, stopping Jason in his tracks.

“You gonna stop me?” Jason challenged, turning back to him.

“I have the keys.” Morgan responded, jangling the set of keys in his hand.

Jason sighed and returned to the mattress he had been sleeping on. He sat down with his back against the wall and his knees bent in front of him, resting his wrists on his knees as he stared at Morgan.

“We all understand what you’re going through.” Morgan began. “We’ve all been there and Rick’s struggling too.”

Jason shook his head. “No, I don’t think anyone really gets it.”

Morgan took a breath, straightening his back. “Then explain it to me.”

Jason glared at him for a moment but relented when he realised that Morgan was being sincere. It then dawned on his tired mind that Morgan didn’t know much about him, hardly anything at all in fact. It made sense that he didn’t quite understand what was going on.

Jason took a deep breath. “Before all this, before everything, I was happy, you know? I had a loving family, great friends and I had found the love of my life. You know that feeling when you’re sure they are the one?”

Morgan smiled softly and nodded. “Yeah. My Jenny was the one for me.”

Jason nodded, seeing the pain on Morgan’s face. “When the world changed, I kept him safe. We survived together for almost eighteen months. Then it happened. A herd came through the camp. Some people scattered and got away but most of them died.”

“He got bit.” Morgan stated. It wasn’t a question, he knew how these things went.

Jason grit his teeth and took another breath, nodding. “Yeah. In his side too, so it couldn’t be amputated. He died in my arms. I held him as he faded away until I lost him. I shot him in the head so he wouldn’t turn and after? After that I was alone.”

“You never found your people?” Morgan asked, assuming a large group would meet up again eventually.

Jason shook his head as his voice turned raspy. “No. I was gone, dead to the world. My reason to keep living was gone. I survived like that for six months, just surviving out of habit instead of a desire to live.”

“Then you met Rick and Carl.” Morgan concluded correctly.

Jason nodded. “I met Carl as he was struggling with a walker. Rick was unconscious. Carl and I just clicked, we connected and I don’t know why. I still don’t understand why he fell in love with me like I did with him but he did.”

Morgan smiled. Jason’s face would light up whenever he talked about Carl. It was rare to see that kind of passion and happiness on the young survivor’s face because of all the trauma and pain he carried with him.

“I was finally happy again. He brought me back to life. I was a fool to think it would last because now he’s lying in that infirmary dying and when he dies I’ll be alone again.” Jason continued, his voice cracking as he fought back the tears. “And I can’t live like that anymore. I can’t go through that again.”

Morgan nodded and leaned forward a little. “You won’t go through that again. No matter what happens, you can come back from it. I know you can.”

Jason looked up at Morgan, his face originally having been staring down at the mattress. “How?”

“Because it’s not like before. You’re not alone, Jason. I know how much Carl means to you but even without him you’re not alone.” Morgan explained gently. “You have a family here. Rick, Michonne, Daryl, Carol and even little Judith. No matter what happens, you can go through it with them.”

Jason’s hand shook as he brought it up so he could hold his forehead with his thumb and forefinger. Morgan was right. Jason had been looking so closely at all the similarities between Carl and Kellin that he had failed to pay attention to the huge differences. When Kellin died he had truly been alone but if Carl were to die, he wouldn’t be alone. Rick and Michonne had become family to him along with everyone else.

Realisation hit him hard as he went through everyone in Alexandria. He no longer had any enemies in the community. At worse there were acquaintances but most were either friends or family to him. If Carl died, the community would go on. His membership in that strong family bond the group had formed would go on. He wouldn’t be alone with the dead for another six months. He didn’t have to kill himself either because he had people to help share the pain with.

Regret was the next thing to hit Jason. He had been so stubborn and blind that he had caused a lot of harm in the last couple days. The fever from the cut on his eyebrow couldn’t be helped but he knew he should have had it seen to immediately. He should have rested instead of wallowing in sorrow. The drinking had been the most stupid thing he could have done. Jason was always an aggressive drunk, it was one of the reasons he never touched it. He had though. He had drank a lot and probably had said awful things to Rick before starting the fight.

“You’re right, Morgan.” He mumbled as he struggled to show his face. “I’ve made a complete arse of myself.”

“It’s okay.” Morgan reassured him. “Like I said, everybody understands.”

Jason nodded and closed his eyes, leaning back against the wall again. “I’ve got to put this right.”

Morgan smiled softly. “You should get cleaned up first. Get some food in you, keep your strength up. Then you can put things right.”

“Well, I can’t do any of that until you open the door.” Jason responded, opening his eyes again.

“The door’s open.” Morgan told him. “Always has been.”

Jason furrowed his brow in confusion. “But you have the keys.”

Morgan nodded. “I said I had the keys. I didn’t say the door was locked.”

Jason smirked and whickered before nodding and getting to his feet. Morgan had got the better of him this time but he didn’t have any hard feelings over it. He needed the stern talking to that Morgan had provided him. He headed to the door and turned the handle, discovering that it had indeed been open the entire time. He opened the door and breathed in the fresh afternoon air.

 

An hour later and Jason was sighing as the hot spray of the shower cascaded over his naked body. He closed his eyes as the torrent of water hit his face, thankful that the plasters placed on his injuries were waterproof. The shower felt empty without Carl in there beside him, making the enclosed shower space feel cold and claustrophobic despite the warm spray. He had plenty of fond memories of that shower but the longer Carl lay in the infirmary, the more likely it was that they would be the last memories he’d make in that shower.

Jason turned the water off and stepped out of the shower, wrapping his lower half in a towel as he looked at himself in the mirror. Before he had got in the shower he had spent time shaving as his face had been turning dark with growth. His wet hair stuck to his head and face, reminding him of its length and the growing need for a haircut. With Jessie dead he wasn’t sure who else knew how to cut hair. He shrugged to himself, it didn’t have to be a professional stylist so it didn’t really matter.

He made his way into the bedroom and started getting dressed. The bedroom also felt very empty without Carl in there with him. Usually Carl would be sitting on the bed reading a book or lying on it still asleep. Other times he would be watching Jason getting changed, enjoying the view of his bare skin that he was already very familiar with. This time, Jason was alone in the large bedroom.

Jason finished getting dressed, slipping his clean leather jacket on as he stretched his body. He heard the soft pop and crack of his joints, not used to the stretching after being in bed for a whole day. He felt strong again. When he had come home the first thing he had done was eat and drink a lot of water. His body had badly needed it and after the refreshing shower he felt awake and alive again. His heart still ached with concern for Carl but he was finally ready to face it head-on.

“Hey.” Michonne’s voice sounded from the doorway.

Jason turned to her and gave a small smile. “Hey.”

Jason looked around the room for his weapons before remembering that they had been confiscated. They would most likely be in the armoury. He could feel Michonne’s eyes on him and turned back to her, raising a hand.

“I know. I screwed up.” Jason told her with a sigh. “And I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.” Michonne replied. “These things happen.”

“No, it’s not okay. You and Rick didn’t react like that. Only me.” Jason retorted. “I was stupid and out of line and I’m sorry.”

Michonne nodded gently, seeing the guilt and pain on Jason’s face. She opened her arms. “Come here.”

Jason hesitated before approaching her and accepting the hug. The two of them embraced, resting their chins on each other’s shoulders. Michonne rubbed his back, feeling the young man relax slightly in her arms.

“I know I can be stubborn and difficult but I want you to know that I never take you for granted.” Jason told her, hugging her a little tighter. “After Carl, you were the first to see me. The real me, I mean. I appreciate you and I wouldn’t be here if not for you, Rick and Carl.”

“We’re family.” Michonne replied. “It works both ways.”

“Yeah, you’re right.” Jason responded and broke the hug. “Where’s Rick? I need to put this right.”

“He’s in the infirmary with Carl.” Michonne told him with a smile.

Jason smiled back and nodded. “Thanks.”

 

Jason kept his hands in his pockets as he made his way down the main street of Alexandria. The bodies had all been cleared and the blood had been washed away, restoring the street to its former glory. You would never be able to tell that they had been attacked by a group of psychopaths and then a herd of monstrous proportions.

Jason took a steady breath as he drew closer to the infirmary. He was nervous about facing Rick after what happened. He couldn’t really remember any of the things he had said but he was sure they had been awful. Michonne and Morgan had been forgiving but he hadn’t attacked either of them. He had attacked Rick. No one was perfect or beyond criticism but attacking Rick felt akin to blasphemy.

The sound of the infirmary’s front door caught his attention as he stepped up onto the porch. He looked up and spotted Enid, who also froze as they made eye contact. Jason had forgotten all about her after everything that had happened. His memories of her started to come back in a rush as he recalled how she seemed to be trying to take Carl away from him. He stared at her with narrowed eyes, silently challenging her to say something, anything.

“Hi.” Enid greeted, slightly hesitantly.

“Hi.” Jason repeated with a rasp as he stepped towards her.

“Look, I know you hate me but I get it now.” She told him, surprising the older teen.

“Do you now?” Jason asked, raising his eyebrows curiously.

“He’s everything to you and without him you wouldn’t be here.” Enid explained. “You were scared of losing him. You are scared.”

“Yeah, I am. Look, I didn’t trust you and I’m not sure I even trust you now.” Jason admitted with a sigh. “But Carl wanted us to get along so I’m willing to try.”

“Me too.” Enid replied, surprising Jason yet again. “Especially after this.”

Jason nodded. “Just remember he’s taken.”

“I know. I know you saw what happened in the tree that day but I’ve known he was yours since then.” Enid told him. “He didn’t cheat. I know what happened with Ron and that’s why I had to go. Ron had some of his father in him.”

“I wanted to kill him. Maybe if I had, this wouldn’t have happened.” Jason confessed. “But it doesn’t matter now. What’s done is done.”

Enid nodded. “I’m gonna go now and let you see him. I’ll see you around.”

“See you.” Jason answered and watched as she walked off down the street.

He pulled his hands out of his pockets and opened the door to the infirmary. When he stepped inside he was met with a wary glance from Denise which he responded to with a raised hand and a weak smile. Neither one of them said anything to the other as Jason walked past her and headed to Carl’s room. He took a deep breath, his hand shaking as he reached for the door knob. It was time to face Rick, for better or worse.

Jason opened the door and stepped inside, closing it quietly behind him. He turned around and was met with the unchanging sight of Carl unconscious on the bed. His head was still heavily bandaged, hiding the gunshot wound from view. His torso was naked as before except for the necklace that Jason had given him back in Gabriel’s church. Jason found himself unconsciously pressing his fingers against his own necklace through his shirt.

Next to Carl’s unconscious form was Rick, who was dressed in clean clothes for a change as he sat at Carl’s bedside holding his son’s hand. He looked up at Jason after coming out of whatever thoughts he had been engrossed in and stared at the teen, assessing him with his gaze.

“Rick, I’m so sorry for what I did, for the awful things I said to you. I don’t really remember what they were but I know myself well enough to know they were awful and hurtful and uncalled for.” Jason apologised with a shaky voice. “I was blind, Rick. I was blinded by my grief and my fear. I thought that if I lost Carl then I’d lose everything, just like when Kellin died. I was wrong.”

Rick didn’t say anything right away, trying to be careful with his words. “And how’s that?”

“Because I couldn’t see what was right in front of me. This place, all these people and especially you and Michonne. We’ve become a family unit, all of us and I’m not alone. Even if Carl doesn’t make it I’m not going to be alone.” Jason explained, trying his best to hold back the tears. “Because I’ll still have everyone here. I’ll still have you. I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for your leadership and this family we’ve created and I don’t think I’ve ever shown my appreciation of that, my gratitude.”

Rick nodded and stood up. “To be honest, I don’t know if he’s gonna make it. I can’t see it happening. If he…dies, at least he got to live. He could never have been so happy without you. He’s everything to you and you’re everything to him. That’s what living is now. It’s having family.”

“Family is the most important thing now and without it it’s like you said, we’re just the walking dead. We have to hold onto the hope that he’ll pull through otherwise we’ll spiral into depression like I did.” Jason replied before smirking in ironic amusement. “For the longest time you reminded me of my dad until I realised that I look at you like you are my dad. It might sound silly but all this time of being a family unit…”

“It’s not silly.” Rick interrupted. “I look out for you like I look out for Carl and I forgive you for the other day. We’ve all been there.”

Jason nodded, his lip quivering at the combined absolution and vindication. Just as he had done with Michonne, he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Rick. Unsurprisingly, Rick returned the hug as they stood in their embrace. They were a family come whatever may.

 

A few days passed with little change. Carl’s condition remained stable despite being in the coma. Rick, Jason and Michonne all spent plenty of time by his bedside, always hoping that it would be the last time they would need to before he woke up. That hope was never realised. Every day went by with no change in his condition.

Outside the infirmary, the community was coming back together as everyone else had been hard at work rebuilding Alexandria. The wall was fully repaired with more watch points being constructed with the spare wood from the guard tower. They worked together to find cars and ram sharp spikes through them to create an obstacle course for walkers, keeping them away from the main gate. Rick had used this trick at the Prison and Morgan had used it when he had claimed King County for himself. Outside the front gate, Rick had created a sign for anyone who approached.

**MERCY FOR THE LOST. VENGEANCE FOR THE PLUNDERERS.**

Jason sighed as he walked up the street of Alexandria. He had mended the broken bridges with most people in the community after his outbursts. He knew that he had to speak to Gabriel so that things were okay between them. The priest had proven his worth when he kept Judith safe and fought against the herd. Jason knew he was a changed man and there was a lot left unsaid between them. As he headed for the church, he glanced at the memorial wall.

**IN OUR MEMORY**

**DINESH         BOBBY          DEANNA**  
JEFFERY      DAN               JESSIE  
CARTER       SAMANTHA SAM    
HOLLY          PARK            RON                
SHELLY        CHARLYNE MAYA  
RICHARDS  OHARA         TED  
HELEN          DAVID           PASCAL  
STACY          STURGESS   LUCY  
MICHAEL    ADRIAN  
BARNES       NICHOLAS

Jason bowed his head to the wall in silent respect. They had lost a lot of people in such a short time. The Wolves attack had been the most brutal and despite his best efforts he had been unable to save them all. He hated the feeling of powerlessness the apocalyptic world instilled in him. Especially when the love of his post-apocalyptic life lay comatose in a bed with no way of knowing when or even if he’d wake up.

Jason opened the church door slowly and stepped inside. It was a rare place to find him outside of the important community meetings as he had always avoided religious buildings before the apocalypse. Despite his lack of belief, he did feel a strange sense of comfort wash over him as he entered the building. He closed the door behind him and looked at the far end of the church where he found Gabriel sitting on the first pew on the right.

Jason sighed as he sat down beside the priest, staring at the cross silently. He was no stranger to Christian theology, having been brought up in a largely Christian community. Jason looked at the cross as a symbol of sacrifice, a symbol of being punished for doing the right thing. He could certainly relate to it as he constantly worried about Carl’s condition.

“I know better than to assume you’re praying.” Gabriel opened conversation while also looking at the cross.

Jason let a smile cross his face. “Just thinking.”

“About Carl?” Gabriel asked hesitantly, not forgetting their past conflicts.

“Yeah. I’m terrified that he won’t wake up.” Jason told the priest. “And I keep wondering if I made the right decision that night.”

“You may not be a man of God but you can still be a man of faith.” Gabriel told him. “You can have faith in Carl and in his ability to pull through. He’s stronger than you give him credit for.”

Jason nodded slowly. “Yeah, he is. He’s stronger than I am, that’s for sure.”

“What decision is plaguing you?” Gabriel questioned. “From what I was told, there was nothing that could have been done.”

Jason leaned back on the pew, tilting his head back to stare at the ceiling. “Ron. Before the walkers broke into the garage, Ron tried to kill Carl.”

Gabriel took a moment to respond, shocked by the revelation. “I didn’t know.”

“I did. After that, right after, I wanted to kill him. I knew he would do something else.” Jason explained with a loud sigh. “He wasn’t a bad kid, he was just erratic and dangerous. I decided to trust Carl and I didn’t kill him.”

“And now you’re wondering if killing him would have saved Carl?” Gabriel filled in the gap.

Jason sat up again and nodded.

“Jesus taught us to turn the other cheek because forgiveness takes more strength than vengeance.” Gabriel spoke after a few moments. “You did the right thing, what happened after was all accidental and out of your control.”

“Maybe so but it doesn’t change the fact that Carl’s lying in the infirmary with part of his face missing.” Jason growled in frustration.

“No, it doesn’t.” Gabriel responded. “But perhaps the miracle of it all is that he survived.”

“Maybe.” Jason responded as he stood up, heading for the door. “Thanks, Gabriel. You’re a changed man.”

“Jason.” Gabriel called, standing up as well.

Jason stopped and turned back to him.

“You and Carl taught me how to use a machete, which allowed me to defend this place.” Gabriel explained. “Could you teach me how to use guns? I’m ready now.”

Jason smiled and nodded. “Yeah. I’ll teach you to shoot in a couple days.”

 

Jason opened the door to the infirmary. The main room was empty but he could hear voices coming from the room Carl was in. The voices clearly belonged to Rick, Michonne and Denise.

“His heart rate is steady, vitals are strong and where they need to be. Things are looking good.” That was Denise’s voice.

“But what does that mean, Denise? When is he going to wake up?” That was Rick’s voice.

“I’m not a surgeon, Rick. I don’t know how much damage has been done to his brain.” Denise responded, her voice muffled through the door. “I’m optimistic that he will wake up but not all coma victims do.”

Before Rick could respond, Jason burst through the door. He was met with all their stares, especially Denise’s nervous gaze. She was clearly panicking about how her statements would have been interpreted by Jason, who still wasn’t coping well.

“If you had more medicine, more supplies, would that increase his chances?” Jason asked quickly, staring back firmly.

Denise hesitated a little, her eyes darting from Carl, to Rick and back to Jason. “Well, yes. I can’t guarantee it would save him but it would improve his chances.”

Before any of them could speak, a bit of movement on the bed caught their attention. Carl’s head moved a little before he let out a couple loud coughs. Everyone watched in a stunned silence as his body returned to its silent, motionless state.

“Is he… is he waking up?” Rick rasped, holding his breath in anticipation.

“Rick, I’m sorry but it doesn’t mean anything. He’s not waking up yet.” Denise explained. “Coma victims sometimes have sudden moments of movement, it doesn’t mean anything.”

“You’re wrong.” Jason announced firmly.

“What?” Denise spluttered back.

“You’re wrong. It does mean something.” Jason told them. “It means he’s going to wake up and I’m going to make sure that happens.”

Before anyone could respond, Jason spun on his heels and headed back out the door. He stormed past Tara in the front room and headed for the porch outside. The sun was getting low in the sky, signalling the end of the day and the approach of night time.

As he stepped out onto the street he could hear the rush of footsteps on the wooden porch behind him. In one swift movement, Michonne managed to step herself in front of him and blocked his path. She reached her hand out and pressed it against his chest to stop him from walking and to hold him in place.

“Jason, I know what you’re planning to do.” She told him sternly. “You still haven’t fully recovered. You need to rest more.”

“I can rest later.” Jason retorted. “Carl needs the medication.”

“And it’s going to be dark soon. It won’t be safe.” Michonne told him. “Carl can survive one more night. We’ll go on a supply run with Daryl tomorrow, okay?”

Jason considered arguing the point but under Michonne’s intense glare he relented. He sighed and relaxed, nodding his head in agreement. Going out after dark was just making things unnecessarily complicated and dangerous. He could wait a few more hours before going to check for medication.

It was the next morning, the sun still low in the sky as it illuminated Alexandria with its golden glow as the birds tweeted their morning chorus in the trees. Guard duty shifts were about to be swapped around with Sasha still looking over the front gate from the night before. Near the brownstone buildings, Glenn and Maggie were already up and working together to plant various fruits and vegetables so they could start growing their own food, limiting the need for supply runs.

The construction crew had gathered by the solar panels as Abraham laid out Deanna’s expansion plans on a work table. Francine, Bruce, Tobin and Jake were all gathered around as he explained which sections they were going to work on first. They had a lot of work ahead of them but it would all be worth it once it was done.

Spencer headed down the street towards the main gate. He was going to relieve Sasha of guard duty at the main gate so she could finally get some sleep. As he made his way down the road with his rifle in hand, he spotted Morgan on a spare patch of grass practicing with his stick. Not far from the pacifist was Michonne, who was also getting some morning practice with her katana.

“You two would make a good couple.” Spencer joked as they waved in morning greeting.

Morgan and Michonne eyed each other before looking back at Spencer, a short laugh of disbelief leaving both of them.

“I don’t think so.” Michonne replied with a grin.

Spencer bowed his head in embarrassment, realising he could have been interpreted as racist for saying they would make a couple. He had meant it because of their morning routines but panic over a misunderstanding flooded him and prompted him to march onward towards the front gate.

 

Jason drew his TRP Operator handgun and grabbed the handle of the front door to Louis’ Pharmacy. He took a moment to control his breathing, preparing himself for the possibility of lots of walkers inside. He was glad that Sasha wasn’t as aware of her surroundings when she was tired as he had been able to slip out of the community early. There was no need to pull Daryl and Michonne out of the community for some medicine that he could gather easily enough.

The massive herd they had lured out of the quarry had made it so there were very few walkers in the area. Most of the stragglers had been picked up by the herd and either led away by Sasha, Abraham and Daryl or killed inside the walls of Alexandria. Travelling just before sunrise also reduced the chance of encountering survivors as most would still be asleep. Jason smirked, he hadn’t survived for six months on his own without learning a thing or two.

He opened the pharmacy door and aimed his gun in the doorway. The inside seemed dark and silent, which was typical of the apocalypse but he didn’t trust it. He banged his gun against the doorframe loudly and waited. In the moments that followed six corpses appeared, either rising from the floor or from behind shelves and the counter.

Jason holstered his gun and took out his machete. He banged the blade against the door and backed away as the walkers began stumbling towards him. As the first one reached the doorway he slammed his machete into its skull, killing it instantly. Once its body dropped to the floor the next walker took its place before it too was quickly dispatched by Jason’s machete.

Once all six walkers had been killed, Jason stepped into the dimly lit pharmacy and started grabbing bottles and boxes from the shelves. He didn’t know if any of it would be of any help but the number of walkers inside the building suggested no one had raided it since the start of the outbreak. He stuffed what he could into his backpack before kicking open the storeroom door at the back of the pharmacy. A lone walker stumbled towards him from the back of the storeroom but he quickly dispatched it with his blade.

The storeroom was mostly full with various different bottles and boxes. Jason smirked to himself as he started pouring armfuls of the shelves’ contents into his bag. The backpack was getting heavier and heavier but it didn’t matter thanks to Alexandria not being too far away. Once he was done he would be back at the community within an hour, Denise would have access to more medicine and treatment options and Carl would survive the coma and wake up.

Jason pulled his fully packed backpack back on his back and headed for the door. The supply run had been a success with no delays or problems. Seven walkers were easily dealt with after the ten thousand or so they had all dealt with the week before. He made his way out the front door but froze when he immediately realised he wasn’t alone.

A pick-up truck had parked up on the main road ahead of him. Two men sat in the front, both staring at him through the window while another three stood on the back of the truck. They were all armed to the teeth with a mix of assault rifles and shotguns and they made Jason’s skin crawl. This group was not friendly and were aiming their guns at him, prompting Jason to instinctively aim his AKMSU at them.

“Put the gun down!” The bald man at the back of the truck barked. “If we were gonna kill you we’d have done it already.”

Jason hesitated but decided to play along with their little game for now. He lowered his weapon.

“Good, finally someone who can listen to a goddamn instruction.” The bald man commented to his companions. “Now, slide your weapons over to us. All of them.”

“Why the hell should I?” Jason challenged them, his right hand resting on the grip of his Operator.

A sudden gunshot made him jump as the bullet smashed the pharmacy window to his right. “Because they’re not yours anymore!”

Jason felt his legs shake nervously underneath him. These men meant business and were willing to kill him at a moment’s notice. He instantly regretted coming out alone. He grit his teeth as he pulled off his AKMSU and slid it across the concrete, quickly followed by his TRP Operator and his machete.

“See how easy that was?” The bald man snarled. “Now the bag.”

Jason felt his face contort in anger as he glared at the five armed men. He had no choice but to hand over the medicine. Carl’s medicine. He tossed the bag over beside his weapons with a growl of frustration as he stood defenceless before the five men.

“Now tell us your name.” The bald man demanded. “I’m Seth.”

“Jason.” He introduced himself begrudgingly.

“Well, Jason, you’re looking pretty well kept for being out here.” Seth commented, gripping his SPAS-12 shotgun in his hands. “Looks like you’re holed up somewhere good.”

Jason thought for a moment. He knew Alexandria could defend itself but they didn’t need unnecessary bloodshed so soon after losing people.

“No, not anymore. My camp got overrun.” Jason lied nervously. “I barely made it out alive.”

Seth grinned in amusement before pumping his shotgun. “Bullshit. You’re carrying half the pharmacy in that damn bag.”

“Okay, yes, I do have a camp.” Jason admitted before smirking. “But if you go there you’ll be slaughtered.”

Seth laughed alongside his companions. “Not if you let us in. Because that’s what you’re gonna do. John, go get him.”

One of the men who stood beside Seth jumped down off the truck. He was a gaunt man with dirty black hair and a Heckler & Koch M27 IAR in his hands. He slowly made his way towards Jason, keeping his gun raised at all times in case Jason was foolish enough to try anything.

Jason watched as the man approached. He hated the feeling of helplessness. He had come out early to get medicine that could potentially save Carl’s life, he had acquired said medicine and now a group of well-armed assholes were stopping him from getting home. Jason grit his teeth and clenched his fists angrily. He couldn’t just let them have their way.

A sudden burst of gunfire startled them both. A sizeable group of walkers had appeared from one of the alleyways and the other men had started shooting at them. Jason quickly noticed that John had turned his head towards the gunfire and was momentarily distracted. He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out his Taurus PT99.

In one swift movement, Jason raised his Taurus and shot John in the head before the man could react. He dropped his Taurus to the ground and quickly whipped his hands out to grab John’s M27 before it landed on the ground as well. Once he had it in his hands, Jason fired the gun at the truck wildly, his arms shaking violently from the recoil of the fully automatic burst of bullets. The bullets tore through the men and the truck with splatters of blood, yells of pain and clangs of metal against metal. He continued firing until the gun clicked empty.

Jason dropped the gun and picked his Taurus up off the ground. There was an eerie silence as he stared over at the truck which was now decorated with bullet holes. The two men in the front of the truck were slumped against the dashboard with blood covering the inside of the windscreen. Seth and the final man had fallen over the other side of the truck during the hailstorm of bullets.

Jason kept his Taurus in hand as he slowly made his way over to his bag. He just needed to grab his bag and weapons and get out of the area. As he reached down for his bag a shadow was cast over him from behind and the distinct hungry snarl of a walker reached his ears. Just as Jason spun round to deal with it a bullet blasted through the cadaver’s cranium.

Jason spun back round to the truck to find the third man aiming at him from the roadside, his leg thigh bleeding badly from a gunshot. The man fired again but his gun clicked empty as he had spent all his bullets on the walkers moments before. Jason breathed a quick sigh of relief before panic shot through him as Seth popped up from behind the truck with his shotgun in hand.

Jason spun on his heels and dashed back towards the pharmacy as gunshots echoed around him, the glass of the pharmacy windows shattering around him with each shot from Seth’s shotgun. He slammed the door behind him and charged through the pharmacy towards the back door. With any luck, Seth would chase him inside allowing him to double back on him and get his weapons back.

He barged open the back door and scrambled down the alleyway at the back of the pharmacy, side stepping the stiff grasp of a stray walker as he headed for the connecting alleyway. As soon as Jason reached the corner of the alley he stepped out and felt his heart pound in his chest in fear. Seth stood at the other end of the alleyway with his shotgun already aimed. The bald man roared as he fired more shots from the SPAS-12, forcing Jason to dive for cover behind the wall.

Cold sweat ran down Jason’s face from his wet hair as he tried to control his panicked breathing. Adrenaline was surging through his body making his hands and knees shake violently. He forced himself to think up a quick plan. Seth might assume he tried to run again, which would allow Jason to stay where he was for a few more moments.

The explosion of the stray walker’s skull told Jason that he was wrong. Seth was marching up the alleyway with his shotgun ready and with an unmatched bloodlust. Jason gripped his Taurus in a shaky hand and pressed his back against the wall. As soon as Seth showed his face, Jason was going to blast a hole in it.  

Suddenly, Seth rounded the corner of the alleyway with his gun aimed directly at Jason’s chest. Before Jason could pull the trigger there was the loud bang of a gunshot. Jason felt his body jump in response as Seth dropped to the ground with a hole in his head. The teen held his gun at the ready for whoever fired the shot that saved his life, just in case they were just as much a threat as Seth.

He was shocked when Daryl rounded the corner with his Ruger Speed Six revolver in his hand. He glared angrily at Jason who hadn’t lowered his own gun yet. Jason was still trying to process the fact that he had survived a gunfight against five men, the leader of which had just been executed by Daryl.

“Get that gun outta my damn face.” Daryl growled, pushing Jason’s hands down.

“Are you hurt?” Michonne’s voice sounded from behind him.

Jason sighed. They had discovered he was missing and had come looking for him. “No.”

“You oughtta be.” Daryl snarled as he holstered his revolver. “The hell you think you’re playing at coming out here alone?”

Jason glared back at Daryl before walking past him and heading back down the alleyway. He had to retrieve his bag and weapons.

“Hey! I’m talking to you!” Daryl barked as he got in front of the teen.

Every time Jason tried to step around the archer, Daryl moved back into his way. The long haired man glared at Jason, practically boring holes in Jason’s forehead from his stare alone.

“You know why I’m out here.” Jason spat back as he pushed past the archer to grab his bag.

As Jason picked up the bag and his weapons, the three of them heard the screams of the final man who was being devoured by two walkers. The gunshot wound to the leg had prevented him from escaping their ravenous pursuit.

“I thought we agreed to do this together.” Michonne questioned the teen.

“I changed my mind.” Jason replied. “I woke up before you and decided to just get it done. I did.”

“You were almost killed!” Michonne hissed as they followed Jason onto the main road.

“I had it under control.” Jason retorted. “I appreciate the help and all, but I handled it.”

“You call that handling it?” Daryl shot back.

“Yeah. They’re all dead.” Jason replied with a shrug.

Michonne blocked his path. “You said that we’re a family. Why didn’t you wait for us?”

“It’s because we’re a family. You’re like a mother to him, Michonne.” Jason answered, referring to Carl. “I feel better knowing you’re with him when I’m not. If those assholes hadn’t showed up I would have been half-way back by now.”

“And if we’d have come with you we’d be back by now!” Daryl argued as they made their way over to the car Michonne and Daryl had used.

“Can we just hurry up and get the medicine to Denise already?” Jason snapped at them. “The gunfire will have drawn more walkers and if those guys had friends I don’t wanna be here when they show up!”

Daryl and Michonne both glared back at him. His stubbornness was not helping their disappointment in him in that moment.

 

Rick knelt down at Jessie’s grave. Carl hadn’t moved since the coughing the night before and Daryl and Michonne had gone off in search of Jason. Rick knew he should have been angry at Jason for disappearing in the early morning to get medicine for Carl but he couldn’t find the emotion in him. All he felt was grief and anxiety. He wanted his boy back, that’s all he wanted. It didn’t matter to him what it took to have Carl wake up again.

He stared at Jessie’s grave and felt the lump in his throat forming. He had liked Jessie since the moment he first lay eyes on her and he had wanted to be with her. He had been so close to making her part of his family when the herd finally broke in. It had all happened so fast. Deanna died, then Sam, then Jessie and finally Ron before Carl got shot.

“I’m sorry for failing you.” Rick spoke softly to the grave. “Sam was too young to be taken out there. I’m sorry for not realising not all kids can be like Carl.”

 

Spencer gave a signal to Heath to open the gate as the grey sedan rolled in through the gates. Heath closed the gate behind it as the car parked up and Jason, Daryl and Michonne emerged from the car. The youngest of the trio slammed the car door shut behind him and stormed off towards the infirmary as Michonne and Daryl watched him. They had argued all the way back in the car. Michonne sighed and pulled out the guns they had stolen from the dead men so she could take them to the armoury.

Jason burst through the door of the infirmary, startling Denise and Tara who had obviously been in a romantic embrace. He apologised quickly as he slammed the heavy bag down on the table, taking a breath from the exertion. Denise and Tara quickly started rummaging through the contents, sorting them into different piles as Jason made his way through to Carl’s room. He was relieved but also disappointed to find his lover still comatose on the bed.

 

Jason jumped as the door to Carl’s room opened and closed as Rick stepped into the room. He didn’t remember falling asleep even though he couldn’t have been unconscious for too long. He still had his weapons on him.

“Hey.” Rick rasped as he sat down opposite Jason.

“Hey.” Jason replied, taking Carl’s hand in his own.

“Michonne told me you ran into some trouble out there.” Rick began, leaning forward in his chair. “Alone.”

Jason closed his eyes and let out a breath. He could be honest with Rick. “Yeah, five guys wanted my supplies. Said they weren’t mine anymore. I couldn’t let them have that bag.”

“You could have been killed.” Rick told him bluntly. “They sound like the guys who tried to kill Daryl, Sasha and Abraham on the road.”

Jason blinked tiredly. “Come on, Rick. We all cheat death every time we step outside these walls. That’s what life is now. You know that. I know that.”

“It was still stupid.” Rick rasped, leaning back.

“True but I’m here now with Carl.” Jason replied, casting his gaze back to his comatose lover. “That’s all that matters anymore.”

“Actually, I wanted to talk to you about that.” Rick stated hesitantly. “About what we do if Denise can’t save him.”

Jason glared at Rick out the corner of his left eye as his hand drifted up to Carl’s necklace, his other hand on his own necklace as he rubbed both of them gently.

“We’ve already had this conversation, Rick.” Jason rasped back. “I said I’d take care of it.”

Rick was about to answer when a soft groan sounded from Carl’s lips. Both he and Jason instantly stared down at the unconscious teen as his head started to move along with his arms. He groaned weakly as he moved restlessly.

“Denise!” Rick called loudly. “Denise!”

Denise burst into the room and gasped as she saw Carl moving.

“He’s waking up!” Jason exclaimed, clutching Carl’s hand in his own.

Denise rushed to Rick’s side of the bed and grabbed Carl’s arm as his right hand reached for his bandage as he continued to thrash in the bed.

“Carl, don’t touch it.” Denise told him as she pulled his hand away. “Stop moving so much, it’s okay!”

“Is he okay?” Rick rasped, his eyes red as the tears welled beneath the surface.

“I don’t know yet, I’m sorry.” Denise answered with a defeated sigh as Carl stopped moving.

A few tense moments went by before Carl’s remaining eye started to flutter open. It fluttered for a few seconds before slowly opening, his pupil dilating at the intense blast of light as his eye scanned his surroundings. He struggled to focus as the three blobs above him turned into faces.

“D…Dad?” Carl gasped out weakly.

“I’m right here! You’re okay, you’re safe!” Rick exclaimed as he held Carl’s hand in his own, the tears rolling down his face and dripping into his grin.

Jason felt his whole body shake with relief and excitement as he watched Carl wake up. He had never been religious but for the first time in his life he felt he had received a gift from the Gods above. Jason’s cheeks burned with the massive grin that had plastered itself on his face as he held onto Carl’s other hand.

“I’m here too, poppet.” Jason reassured him. “It’s okay, everything’s gonna be okay.”

“What happened to me?” Carl asked his father weakly.

“You were shot.” Rick told him, wiping away some of his tears. “It’s so good to hear your voice again.”

Carl’s eye squinted as he looked up at his father, struggling to remember getting shot.

“Dad, where’s mum?” Carl rasped out before looking back to Jason. “And who are you?”

 

**And it’s done!**  
**So, I think it’s safe to say I have some explaining to do. I’m really sorry for making everyone wait six months for another chapter. It truly wasn’t my intention and I hope I haven’t lost too many readers as a result. Life has just been so hectic and sort of like Jason at the start of this chapter, I sort of lost a bit of my sanity for a while. I guess you could call it a nervous breakdown of sorts.**  
 **Regardless, I’m slowly pulling myself back together and was able to finally complete this huge chapter. If it isn’t up to my usual standard then I’m really sorry, I had a lot to cover for this chapter and life just butchered my rhythm completely.**

**There’s a couple Easter Eggs in this chapter, as usual and I want to thank everyone who sent in suggestions. They really helped piece together this chapter. I will need more suggestions for chapter 30, so feel free to keep sending in ideas for scenes you’d like to see.**

**Thanks for all the votes/kudos/favourites/follows/bookmarks/subscriptions etc.**

**A special thanks to the reviewers of Chapter 28:** **angelicdamnation, Dark.SKY27, blackenedsoul, Youngblooded, Shiva, Hunter, BluhBluh, Sarah_94, RainbowO, scraphound, Natalie73, Thewalkingdeadisthebestshow, IBmax, jar98, kingcarlgrimes, Fangirlx, leylinjan, xayylaax, webarebaers, WitchingHour, Can'tloginsohere'sthisname, Marlene, Madison, Emma, and all the guests.**

**And an extra special thanks to my close friend, Sam, for helping me create the Saviours scene.**

**I promise to have Chapter 30 up much sooner. It probably won’t be up before the Season 7 Premiere, but it should be up before episode 3. Of course, the more suggestions and feedback I get the faster I can get the next chapter completed.**

**Sorry again. :3**


	30. Trauma

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carl has finally woken up from the coma but is now suffering memory loss. How will Jason react to suddenly becoming a stranger?

 

_“And who are you?”_

The question echoed inside Jason’s head as he stared at the injured teen in the bed. He was aware that Denise was saying something but he couldn’t hear her. His thoughts were so muddled that any noise sounded like he was underwater. Carl Grimes, the brave teen he had been in love with for months had just woken up after surviving a fatal injury. His first words to Jason hadn’t been exclamations of relief or romantic teasing for having been so worried. No, his first words had been a simple question.

_“Who are you?”_

The question, for all its simplicity, was the hardest question he had ever been asked in his life. Jason didn’t know how to answer the question, how to explain who he was or why he was so upset now. Contrary to all of Jason’s doubts and worst fears, Carl had woken up. Unfortunately, Carl had woken up without his recent memory which meant that Carl Grimes, Jason’s boyfriend and reason for living, didn’t know who he was. How could he possibly begin to explain who he was to the teen lying in the bed without freaking him out? Jason couldn’t find the strength to answer such a soul shattering question.

“Is mum here?” Carl’s weary voice brought him out of his reverie. “What happened?”

Jason looked over to Rick and found the man staring at him. Rick knew exactly why Jason had fallen so silent and why there were tears brimming on his eyes. He couldn’t imagine how it felt to be completely forgotten, at least Carl remembered his father. Rick turned back to face Carl and hesitated. He didn’t know what to say or how to begin to explain things.

“Who are you?” Carl asked, turning his head to Denise.

“I’m Denise, I’m a doctor.” Denise explained, far more composed than Rick or Jason. “I’ve been trying to make you better. You were shot.”

“Shot? I was…” Carl’s voice was practically a whisper as he held his head. “Oh God…”

Rick suddenly shot forward and wrapped his arms around his son’s naked torso, pulling him in for a tight hug. Carl was confused and a little stunned by the sudden display of affection, especially when he felt the warm tears dripping onto his back. He slowly wrapped his arms around his father as best he could.

“It’s okay. Things are a little fuzzy right now but I’ll explain everything. I’ll…” Rick trailed off, holding his son tighter. “You’re okay, that’s all that matters now.”

“Dad, can I eat?” Carl asked as they pulled apart. “I’m hungry.”

Rick wiped the tears from his eyes and nodded, looking back to Denise for confirmation. “Yeah, of course. I’ll go make you something.”

“I can get it.” Jason offered, standing up quickly.

Rick shook his head. “Sit, you’ve already helped him today. It’s my turn.”

Jason sighed as he couldn’t find the energy to argue. He nodded and slumped back down in his chair, rubbing his forehead as he tried to make sense of everything. So many thoughts, doubts, concerns and fears were rushing through his mind at a hundred miles an hour. What if Carl never got his memory back? What if Carl didn’t love him anymore? What if they ended up drifting apart after this? What if Carl blamed him or resented him? What if there were complications that Denise couldn’t do anything to fix?

“…help me?” Carl’s voice interrupted his thoughts.

Jason looked up, opening his eyes and realising he was alone with Carl. “What, sorry? I was miles away there.”

“How did you help me?” Carl repeated softly. “My Dad said you helped me today.”

“Oh, that.” Jason responded, sitting up. “I went out on a supply run to get you medicine. We had no idea when you’d wake up.”

“Thanks.” Carl replied, feeling a strange tension in the air. “I know how dangerous it is out there.”

“You needed medicine and nothing, dead or alive, was going to keep me from getting it.” Jason told him, smiling for the first time since Carl initially woke up.

“So, who are you?” Carl asked gently, more aware of the fact he had clearly lost some memory.

Jason hesitated, trying to think of the best answer. “I’m Jason, I’m a friend, a member of the group. You were the one who brought me in.”

“I was?” Carl asked, surprised and then disappointed. “I don’t remember.”

“That’s okay.” Jason replied, holding Carl’s hand gently. “I remember. That’s enough for now.”

“Does Denise help Hershel?” Carl asked, spontaneously. This was one personality trait the bullet couldn’t get rid of.

Jason looked down, hesitating again. He had never met Hershel but he knew enough from what Carl and the others had told him. A great man who was a grandfather to the group, a man who seemed to possess all the wisdom in the world. A gentle man who died violently, brutally decapitated by the Governor. Jason couldn’t drop that bombshell on the teen in front of him.

“How about you relax and let your Dad explain everything after you’ve eaten?” Jason suggested as a deflection. “You’ll give yourself a headache with all these questions.”

Carl’s air of curiosity seemed to quickly deflate. “Okay.”

Jason stood up. “I’ll make sure your Dad’s making one of your favourites.”

“You know my favourite foods?” Carl questioned.

“Of course, I do.” Jason quipped confidently as he made his way to the door.

 

Rick stood out on the infirmary porch, looking out at the streets of Alexandria. He shared Jason’s distress as he felt the weight of responsibility sit on his shoulders, threatening to crush his spine. He was Carl’s father and it was his responsibility to take care of his son and tell him the truth, no matter how devastating. It was a hard pill to swallow.

“Rick?” Denise’s voice sounded as the door opened.

“How is he?” Rick asked, turning to face her.

“He’s fine. He’s eating.” Denise told him. “Jason and Tara are with him.”

Rick turned back round, his face falling to the ground as he continued to struggle with the responsibility placed on him. Carl had lost his memory of at least the past year. So much had happened, so many people had died and he wasn’t sure he could handle putting his son through that heartbreak again.

“Rick, his cognitive skills seem intact and I see no cause for alarm.” Denise explained. “The memory loss isn’t uncommon with severe brain trauma. It could come back on its own.”

“What am I supposed to do?” Rick asked her with a shaky breath.

“What do you mean?” She asked, not following his train of thought.

“A large chunk of his memory is just gone. He doesn’t even know who Jason is for Christ’s sake.” Rick spat out in frustration. “How am I supposed to deal with that? How am I supposed to tell him his mother’s dead?”

Denise fell silent, the implications of Carl’s memory loss finally hitting her. How many other people had Rick’s group lost before coming to Alexandria? How many of those people did Carl think were still alive because of his memory gaps.

“Yeah.” Rick responded to her silence.

The former sheriff paced along the porch with his hands on his hips, looking out at the streets and lake of Alexandria. The late afternoon sun was bright in the sky, a sharp contrast to the dark pit Rick felt he was now in.

“I can’t tell you how happy I am to have him back, to know that he’s alive.” Rick told her. “But to get him back only to turn around and break his heart? I don’t know if I can…”

The sound of the porch door closing interrupted Rick from his thoughts, the man spinning round to see who had joined them. Jason stood in front of the door, his hand still weakly holding the handle as he kept his gaze down towards his feet.

“Is Carl alright?” Rick quickly questioned him. “Did something happen?”

Jason shook his head and finally lifted his gaze. “He’s fine. He’s asleep.”

Rick felt the tension in his shoulders lessen at the good news. He was so worried and stressed that he kept preparing himself for the worst. Like Jason, he too feared that something could still go wrong with Carl’s condition and they’d be back at square one.

“Rick, I’m sorry but I need some time to myself.” Jason told him. “He doesn’t remember me and I don’t know how to deal with that right now.”

Rick nodded slowly, resting a hand on Jason’s shoulder. “That’s okay. I could tell him if you wanted.”

Jason shook his head violently. “No. You have to promise me you won’t tell him. It’s not important.”

“Of course, it’s important.” Rick argued. “You’re important to him.”

“No, Rick. I was.” Jason corrected him. “Until his memory comes back, _if_ it comes back, I’m not important right now.”

Rick was about to argue some more when Denise interjected. “It might be wiser to filter the memories bit by bit so we don’t overwhelm him.”

The group leader let out a deep exhale as he thought about it before nodding slowly. He would keep Jason’s connection to Carl a secret for now. With his nod of acceptance, Jason walked past them and stepped off the porch and onto the street. The teen needed time to think and to process everything that had happened.

 

Rick sat on the chair beside Carl’s bed, his hands clasped together on his lap as he observed his injured son. Carl was a capable survivor of the apocalypse; a young teenager who was efficient at killing walkers and people when the need arose. Yet, lying in the bed with the bandage covering his eye and most of his head, he looked as fragile as a dry leaf that threatened to crumble at the slightest disturbance.

“Dad, how long do I have to stay here?” Carl asked, breaking the sombre silence of the infirmary.

“Denise just wants to keep an eye on you a little longer.” Rick explained with a soft smile. “I’m sure she’ll let me take you home tomorrow morning.”

“That’s right, we live in a house now.” Carl muttered, squinting as some of his memory returned to him. “Is mum there?”

Rick fell silent and hesitated about telling him the truth. He knew there was no way around it as Carl would eventually find out or remember on his own. With a shaky breath, Rick took Carl’s hand and gently squeezed it.

“Carl.” Rick rasped. “Your mother died.”

“Oh…” Carl closed his eyes in disappointment. He hated that he had failed to remember that. “How did she die?”

“She died giving birth to Judith.” Rick rasped, struggling to remain strong for his son’s sake.

“Judith?” Carl questioned, not remembering the name.

“Your baby sister.” Rick clarified.

“What happened to her?” Carl asked, expecting the worst.

Rick smiled. “She’s still with us.”

“Oh… That’s good.” Carl responded. “I think.”

“Carl, are you okay?” Rick asked, surprised by how calm Carl appeared to be. “Aren’t you sad?”

“I don’t think so. I miss mum but even though I don’t remember, it doesn’t feel like she’s alive.” Carl explained slowly, squinting as his head started to ache. “She just feels gone. Most of the people I know feel gone, Hershel, Tyreese, Andrea and Bob are all dead. So are Jessie, Ron and Sam…”

Rick bolted upright at the last three names. “You remember Jessie and her boys?”

Carl shook his head. “I just know they’re dead. They were attacked, weren’t they? I was there, wasn’t I?”

Rick nodded frantically. “Yes, you were! They died just before you were shot!”

“Were they attacked by an animal?” Carl questioned, raising a hand to press against his forehead.

Rick furrowed his brow and shook his head. “No, walkers got in and killed them.”

“I remember hearing an animal, it was a roar like some kind of monster.” Carl explained, leaning his head back against the pillow. “I’m tired, can I sleep some more?”

“Of course.” Rick replied, standing up. “If no one’s here when you wake up, Denise and Tara are in the next room.”

“Okay.” Carl answered, closing his eyes. “I love you, Dad.”

“I love you too, son.” Rick rasped back before leaving the room and gently closing the door behind him.

 

Jason sighed and rubbed his eyes with his thumb and forefinger as he walked down one of Alexandria’s many streets. He headed past the lake, gazing at its calm waters in the hopes they would somehow help to calm his nerves and fears. It was frustrating. Carl was awake and seemed to be well so Jason should have had a spring in his step, should have been celebrating and spending time with his lover. Instead, he was mournfully walking away from the infirmary because he couldn’t handle Carl’s amnesia. His boyfriend didn’t know who he was and it stung his heart like a thousand angry bees. He cynically considered whether it was all part of some cosmic balancing act that prevented him from ever being too happy.

In the distance, he could hear the constant hammering and shouting from the construction crew as they continued working on the wall. There were still many more repairs to make, not just to the wall but also to the houses that had been damaged by the walker invasion. After all of that was done there was still more work awaiting them in the form of the expansion. Regardless of whether Carl recovered his memory or not, he promised himself to help Alexandria as much as possible. If not for Deanna and the community, he wouldn’t have had all the good times with Carl that he had been fortunate enough to have. It was only fair he tried to give back to the community that had given them so much.

A loud bark got his attention as his favourite chocolate Labrador bounded towards him, tail wagging and tongue flailing. He was happy to see that Brodie had survived the walker attack and got down on one knee as Brodie finally closed the distance between them. Jason giggled as he scrunched his face up in response to the violent assault of licks he received from the large pup. He patted and rubbed Brodie’s head and neck as the Labrador’s front paws ended up on his shoulders, threatening to push him onto his back.

“I think he missed you.” Trisha’s voice sounded as she finally caught up.

Jason wriggled free and stood up, flicking his fringe out his eye with a snap of his head. “Yeah, looks like it.”

 “Your hair’s getting pretty long again.” Trisha commented as Brodie darted back and forth between them. “I’m not Jessie, but I could cut it for you if you like.”

Instinctively, Jason was about to say no but he quickly realised he would have been heading home to sit alone. The idea of being alone with his thoughts right now wasn’t a pleasant one and was enough to make him change his mind.

“Yeah, I guess I could use a haircut.” He replied with a weak smile.

 

Half an hour later, Jason found himself sat on the couch in Trisha’s living room, his leather jacket draped over the back of it. Brodie was sprawled out on the rug, dozing off as Trisha came through from the kitchen with two glasses. She handed one to the teen before sitting down beside him.

“So, you were quiet during the haircut.” Trisha began. “What’s up? How’s Carl?”

Jason took a sip of his drink and leaned forward. “He’s awake.”

“That’s wonderful news!” She exclaimed, sitting up.

“Yeah, it is.” Jason replied, looking down into his drink hoping it had answers.

“What’s wrong?” She questioned, placing her glass on the table. “I figured you’d be celebrating instead of moping around.”

“He doesn’t remember me, Trisha.” Jason sighed, rubbing his forehead. “He woke up with amnesia that has blacked out the last year.”

“Oh, hon, I’m sorry to hear that.” Trisha gasped and wrapped an arm around Jason’s shoulders. “His memory will come back, won’t it?”

Jason shrugged. “We don’t know. It might not and if it doesn’t I don’t know what to do.”

“You won’t lose him to amnesia, Jason.” Trisha told him with a motherly tone.

“I might.” Jason mumbled. “He might end up with someone else, or be disgusted with me if I told him what we were.”

“Stop being silly.” Trisha scolded him softly. “He didn’t know you when you met and he fell in love with you, right?”

Jason turned to her and thought about how he met Carl. He remembered the nervous boy leaning against the bedroom door who later spent the afternoon eating pudding on a roof. He remembered how much trust Carl placed in him from very early on and how he defended Jason constantly from any criticism or suspicion. Jason had struggled to control himself around the younger teen when he realised he was slowly falling for him but Carl had fell in love with him rapidly. Perhaps Trisha had a point and he wasn’t going to lose Carl despite the possibility of permanent amnesia.

Jason slowly nodded. “Yeah, you’re right.”

“Of course, I am.” Trisha replied with a cheeky smirk and kissed his forehead.

Jason turned his face quickly to shield the slightly red tint that ghosted across it from view. He stood up quickly and put his leather jacket back on.

“I should probably get going.” Jason commented. “I don’t want to outstay my welcome.”

Trisha stood up with him, gently placing her hand on his arm. “Don’t be silly, you’re always welcome here.”

“Thanks, but I really should get going.” He replied, slowly breaking away from her grasp.

“Jason, what about the survival lessons?” Trisha asked, stopping the teen in his tracks. “You didn’t forget, did you?”

“No, I’ve just had a lot going on.” Jason all but snarled back without thinking. He thought that was obvious. “We’ll start in the next couple days.”

“Okay, I’m looking forward to it.” Trisha replied, finally letting him head for the door.

 

Rick closed the door of the infirmary porch behind him as he stepped outside yet again. He was relieved and eternally grateful to Denise for saving his son’s life. He had his boy back again and although Carl had lost his memory, it looked like some of it was going to come back. They would rebuild Alexandria and make it better than it ever was. They had to. Rick vowed to make sure they were set for the rest of their lives. For Carl.

“Rick!” Daryl’s voice carried through the air from the street as he and Michonne approached the porch.

“How’s Carl?” Michonne asked sincerely, trying to glance through the windows but finding the curtains closed.

Rick rested his hands on his holster and hip. “He finally woke up.”

Michonne’s face split into a grin as tears of joy threatened to escape her eyes.

“What’d I say?” Daryl quipped, turning to Michonne with his arms folded. “He’s a tough son of a bitch!”

Rick smiled in amusement before agreeing. “Yeah, he is.”

“How is he?” Michonne asked, calming down and recalling how serious his injury had been.

Rick glanced down at his feet and took a deep breath. “He seems fine but he’s lost some of his memory.”

Michonne’s smile slowly fell from her face. “How much?”

Rick sighed defeatedly, glancing at Daryl for strength. “Since before Lori died. But some things are coming back, pieces, names, stuff like that.”

“So, it might all come back?” Michonne questioned rhetorically.

Rick nodded before turning back to Daryl. “You good for a run?”

Daryl nodded once. “Sure.”

Rick nodded again and turned back to Michonne. “Carl’s sleeping right now but I need you to look after him for a while. I need to go on a run.”

Michonne furrowed her brow at the former sheriff. “Why do you need to go? What about Glenn? Or Aaron? Or me?”

Rick shook his head. “I just…I need to do this. Please stay with him?”

“He’s lost his memory, Rick.” Michonne scolded him. “He’s going to wake up scared and alone. Why are you leaving?”

“Please, just take care of him while I’m gone.” Rick pleaded with the samurai, holding her shoulders gently until she nodded in acceptance. “Thank you.”

Michonne nodded gently as Rick let go of her shoulders and headed for the front gate with Daryl. She watched the two men walk away for a couple minutes before finally focusing on what Rick had trusted her to do. After thinking about it, she understood what Rick was doing. He just needed a bit of time away from it all, much like Jason did as well. In their place, Rick had trusted Michonne to look after his son. They were a family, after all.

 

Jason headed down to the main gate to check on the construction crew and how the wall repairs were coming along. Abraham was missing from his watch point and had been replaced by Sasha. The sound of hammering rhythmically filled the air as he watched them all work on the wall. They had managed to erect it again and were now reinforcing it in case anything like that were to ever happen again.

“Jason!” Tobin called from one of the work benches. “How’s Carl?”

Jason decided to mask the truth a little, he was tired of discussion. “He’s asleep but out of the coma.”

“That’s great news!” Tobin exclaimed with a smile. “He had us all worried for a while there. So did you.”

Jason rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah, sorry for that outburst the other day.”

“Hey, don’t worry about it.” Tobin reassured him. “After all the times you’ve helped us, you’re allowed to have an off-day.”

Jason nodded as the two men walked over to the work bench where Deanna’s expansion plans lay spread out.

“We’re going to start the expansion soon.” Tobin told him. “You can help us if you want.”

Jason hesitated for a moment before remembering his promise. “I’ll look at the plans and see if I can see anything I can do.”

“Great!” Tobin replied. “I’ll get back to work then.”

Jason nodded in acknowledgement before resting his hands on the bench. He looked down at Deanna’s expansion plans and studied them carefully. He noticed the perimeter markings where they had already expanded beyond the church, which would soon give them two or three new houses. Any patches of land not used for construction was to be turned into farm-land for crops and fruit to grow. Some buildings would be repurposed, showing that Deanna had heard Rick’s message loud and clear about survival.

Thinking about Deanna still stung with pain for Jason. They hadn’t always seen eye to eye and he was glad they had made amends before she died. He felt awful for Spencer, not only because he had lost his mother but also because her body hadn’t been recovered in the clear up. Either the walkers had torn her to bits or she had reanimated and somehow wandered off. Jason hoped that it was the former.

As he continued to study the plans he noticed something written in the margin. He assumed it was Deanna’s handwriting as it had been written with the same pencil as the rest of the plans. Jason had some understanding of French and Spanish but absolutely none when it came to Latin, which frustrated him more. The message had clearly been important enough to Deanna for her to write down and he was too uncultured to understand it.

“Dolor hic tibi proderit olim.” Tara’s voice startled Jason suddenly. “This pain will be useful to you.”

“You speak Latin?” Jason questioned, surprised and stepping aside so she could see the plans.

“Nah, but my aunt was a serious catholic and forced me to learn some of it.” Tara explained with a smile. “How are you coping?”

“I’m starting to get tired of people asking me that, honestly.” Jason replied, glancing back down at the plans to break eye contact.

“Well, you’re gonna have to deal with it because we care.” Tara retorted. “That’s what we do.”

“Yeah, well, you know how I’m doing.” Jason told her, standing straight. “You saw him earlier. I’m a stranger to him.”

Tara surprised Jason yet again by pulling him into a tight hug which he quickly reciprocated, allowing himself to relax into the embrace for a few moments. He knew people cared but sometimes he needed more than just some kind words and looks of concern. Tara seemed to understand that instinctively.

“He’ll remember you but if he doesn’t, you just have to let him get to know you again.” Tara told him without breaking the embrace. “And if you ever need to talk to someone, I’m here, okay?”

Jason nodded and gently broke the embrace. “Yeah, I know. Thanks, Tara.”

Tara held out her fist. “Fist bump?”

Jason smiled and held out his own fist, bumping it against hers. Tara let out a quiet exclamation of celebration at the fist bump before heading over to help with the construction. Jason looked back down at the plans and specifically at the Latin phrase. He repeated it to himself a few times in Latin and in English before grabbing a wooden panel, some nails, a hammer and a couple wood carving tools. He managed to find a marker pen in one of the toolboxes before taking off his leather jacket and rolling up his shirt sleeves.

Jason rested his forearms on the work bench and started writing onto the wooden panel with the marker pen. He took his time, carefully drawing out each letter so they had the same average height and width. He kept glancing at the expansion plans so he copied the Latin down perfectly as he continued to write onto the wood in thick, bold lettering. He put the pen down once he was done and double checked the writing to make sure it was how he wanted it.

As he was happy with it, he grabbed the engraving tools and started digging away at the wood. This required a lot of patience and careful precision as he kept the engraving within the lines of his writing while also making sure it wasn’t too deep or too shallow. Occasionally he had to stand up straight and bend backwards to relieve the ache in his back caused by his hunched over position. He frequently wiped sweat from his brow as it was rather hot standing in the afternoon sun.

Once the engraving was finally done he looked around for some spare paint that no one was using. Fortunately, the wall didn’t need painting and he managed to find two different paint colours, a dark brown colour and a white paint that matches the walls of the church. Jason used a thin brush to paint the letters of his engraving with the dark brown after using a thicker brush to paint the rest of the panel white. Once he was done, he put the brush down on the bench and appreciated his completed work. All that was left was for the paint to dry.

 

Carl groaned as he stirred from his sleep and slowly opened his remaining eye. His eye darted around the room, examining the ceiling, the curtains, walls and finally the woman sitting by his bedside. Her appearance was very distinct, a beautiful face, dark skin, well-kept dreadlocks and an eye-catching katana sheathed on her back in its scabbard. The injured teen searched for her name in his memory, squeezing his eye shut as he tried to find it but kept coming up short. Carl didn’t know her name but he knew that he knew her. The katana stood out to him. He knew someone with a katana, he was sure of it.

“I know you, don’t I?” Carl asked groggily.

Michonne nodded and smiled. “Yeah. I’m Michonne.”

Carl closed his eye for a moment as her name triggered memories. He remembered watching Michonne slice into walkers with her sword like a hot knife through butter. He could remember going to King County with Michonne and his father. She had done something for him there, some kind gesture that had earned his trust. He couldn’t remember what she did but he knew she could be trusted. That was the same day he had shot his father’s friend, the man who lived there with all the booby traps. His name also started with an M. Carl struggled to find the man’s name until it finally came to him. Morgan. The man’s name was Morgan.

He remembered that Michonne had lived at the prison with them. A vision of her kneeling in front of a tank crossed his mind but he couldn’t work out the context of it. His sighed in frustration because he knew that was an important event. Carl remembered laughter and he remembered their talks. He and Michonne would talk a lot and he would tell her things, important things. He had told her something important once but he couldn’t remember what it was. He was sure it was about someone else, he had told her something about someone else. Carl groaned as the more he focused on his fragmented memories the more they seemed to break apart even more.

“Carl, are you okay?” The samurai asked in immediate concern.

Carl sighed and nodded against the pillow. “Just trying to remember.”

“Tell me what you remember and I’ll help fill in the blanks.” Michonne offered, leaning forward a little.

“I remember we met at the prison. You did something for me in King County after we met Morgan.” Carl rambled a little. “I remember you kneeling in front of a tank and us talking a lot. I’ve told you secrets before, I think.”

Michonne smiled at the injured teen. “Your group took me in at the prison. I helped you get a picture of you and your parents in King County. The tank belonged to the Governor. Do you remember him?”

Carl squinted his eye and tried to think. “He killed Merle and…”

Carl’s head pounded as more memories flooded back to him rapidly.

_The Governor was at the prison gates, his militia ready with a tank and several guns all of them ready to kill those who lived in the prison. In front of them, Michonne and Hershel were knelt down on the grass as Rick tried to negotiate with the psycho in front of him. The Governor, not taking no for an answer, pulled out Michonne’s sword and held it against Hershel’s neck._

_“You! You, in the pony tail. Is this what you want?” Rick called out, trying to appeal to Tara. “Is this what any of you want?!”_

_“What we want is what you got. Period.” The man in the tank answered. “Time for you to leave, asshole!”_

_“Look, I fought him before and after we took in his old friends, they’ve become leaders in what we have here.” Rick told them, pointing at the Governor. “Now you put down your weapons, walk through those gates. You’re one of us.”_

_The Governor glared at Rick with his one good eye. The whole scenario was not playing out as he had hoped. Rick was being perfectly reasonable._

_“We let go of all of it and nobody dies. Everyone who is alive right now, everyone who’s made it this far. We’ve all done the worst kinds of things just to stay alive!” Rick pleaded with them. “But we can still come back. We’re not too far gone. We get to come back and I know we all can change.”_

_The Governor slowly removed the sword from Hershel’s neck. The old man smiled to Rick as he realised the leader of their group had indeed been listening to all the things he had been saying. Rick had changed and was actually trying to do the right thing, even with the Governor. The Governor, however, doubted he could ever let go of the past. He doubted any of them could._

_The Governor glared at Rick. “Liar!”_

_With one sudden swing, the Governor sliced into Hershel’s neck with Michonne’s sword, decapitating the old man only half way. Hershel’s head dropped to the side as his neck was sliced open, blood pouring down his shirt as he dropped to the ground. Rick screamed and opened fire on the Governor’s militia. The battle had begun._

Carl gasped and clutched his forehead with his hands. “He killed Hershel…”

Michonne rubbed his back gently. “Yeah, he did. Carl, you don’t have to remember everything at once.”

Carl lifted his head and stared back at her. “How’s Beth? Is she here?”

Michonne’s face dropped as she had to deliver more bad news. “She’s gone. Beth died back in Atlanta.”

_Glenn stabbed one of the walkers that occupied the parking lot in the head while Michonne decapitated another one. There weren’t many walkers and it was wise of them to stick to silent weapons when in the city. They didn’t need a herd descending upon them. Once they made it past the main gates and approached the front door they spotted a figure emerge._

_Rick walked out with his hands by his sides and with puffed up red eyes. His expression said it all. He was upset. Sasha followed behind him, marching out with her sniper rifle with a blank expression as if she was holding back her emotions. Behind her was Tyreese who walked hand in hand slowly with Carol who was still finding it difficult to walk after being hit by a car. Carol still had tears rolling down her face._

_Maggie dropped her gun to the floor as her worst nightmare became reality. From behind Tyreese and Carol, Daryl emerged carrying Beth’s lifeless body. Blood was still dripping from her hair. Jason froze where he was, obscuring Carl’s view of the group. He didn’t know Beth but at that moment he recognised her. He knew that it was her who was being carried in Daryl’s arms._

_“Beth!” Maggie screamed as she dropped to the floor sobbing._

_After all the time spent since the prison was endured. All of the chaos, all of the danger and misplaced hope. Then to be told that Beth was alive and well only to be greeted by her dead body. Maggie fell apart right there where she landed, unable to move as she sobbed uncontrollably._

“Oh…” Carl gasped as the memory came back in a sudden flash.

Michonne kept rubbing his back. “I’m sorry. And you’re right, you’ve told me secrets before.”

Carl smiled weakly. “I knew it.”

Carl’s remaining eye slowly closed as the pounding in his head continued. The sudden flashes from his memory banks along with the effort of understanding them had drained him of energy. Michonne eased him back on the bed and sat by his side, feeling more optimistic about his memory recovery than she did before.

 

Jason stood atop the ladder steps uneasily. He hated ladders and always felt uncomfortable on them. It was strange, as he had gone on many mountain hikes when he was younger and had never feared the heights. There was just something too insecure about ladders to allow him to relax when using them. He wiped more sweat from his brow with his sleeve before using a clamp to hold the sign he had created in place.

Jason hammered in the first nail, penetrating the top of the sign and carrying on through into the wood of the church wall. He continued to hammer nails into each corner of the sign until it hung securely from the wall. Jason slowly removed the clamp, double checking that the sign had been hammered into place properly before finally climbing down the ladders. He stepped back to observe his work.

The white background of the sign blended in with the wall above the church door. The dark brown lettering stood out strongly, spelling out the Latin phrase that Deanna had written in the margin of the plans. Jason smiled. It was a fitting tribute to the former leader of the community and the quote itself said a lot about the group’s ability to survive.

**DOLOR HIC TIBI PRODERIT OLIM**

This pain will be useful to you.

 

Abraham made his way down the darkened corridor of an old office building. Abraham, Rick and Daryl had decided to split up while searching the building due to the size of it. The silent darkness of the building and its offices indicated that there was very little walker activity and almost certainly no human activity in the building. The former solider was not one to take chances, however, so he kept his Colt M16 pointed ahead of him with the iron sight up at eye level at all times. Danger had a habit of popping out when you least expected it.

A muffled noise caught the red head’s attention, forcing him to freeze on the spot as his eyes scanned the corridor for the source. He listened closely in an effort to identify the muffled sound he was hearing. The more he listened, the more he thought it sounded like crying. Walkers didn’t cry but someone sobbing could mean a lonely a survivor was in the building with them.

Not taking any chances, Abraham holstered his M16 on his back and pulled out his combat knife, gripping it in one hand while holding his Beretta 92FS in the other. He moved slowly and silently as he searched for the source of the sobbing before coming across a closed office door. It was a small private office and he could make out the shape of someone through the privacy glass on the door. Abraham took a breath and quickly opened the door, aiming his Beretta at the sobbing person only to freeze in surprise when his eyes met Rick’s.

“Rick?” He asked, closing the door over. “You’re crying?”

Rick looked up at the ginger soldier from where he sat on the floor with his back against the wall. He did his best to calm himself down and wipe away the tears, embarrassment flooding through him from being caught crying by Abraham of all people.

“Yeah…it’s nothing really.” Rick rasped back as he wiped away the tears. “I’m just a little…well, I’m clearly upset. Sorry.”

Abraham sat down on the desk. “After everything, you ain’t got shit to apologise for.”

“Everyone’s always looking at me to be the leader.” Rick explained with a sigh. “I hate for anyone to see me like this.”

Abraham furrowed his brow. “Why? You’re a man, not a damn machine.”

“My Dad gave me the whole “boys don’t cry” speech and I’ve always tried to adhere to that but it’s never really worked out.” Rick continued to explain, gazing at the floor. “Feels like I’m always a few thoughts away from crying, especially after…everything.”

“With all due respect, officer, your father was a dumbass.” Abraham countered. “Boys cry. Men cry. Soldiers cry. You watch a marine burst his emotional sack at breakfast the last thing you think about is calling him weak.”

“That’s war.” Rick retorted weakly. “That’s different.”

“And what the bitch do you think this is?” Abraham answered sharply. “This is survival. This is war and we are soldiers. All of us. So, wanna tell me what’s really peeling your onion?”

Rick took a breath. “It’s Carl.”

“No shit.” Abraham snorted. “After almost losing him…”

“It’s not that.” Rick interrupted. “I’ve reminded him of things, like his mother being dead, but he doesn’t grieve. It’s like he’s moved on because he’s too strong to get upset anymore.”

“Sounds like he’s imitating the idiocy of his father.” Abraham remarked thoughtfully. “Sees you always being strong and thinks he has to be the same damned way.”

“I used to think that but after everything we’ve been through, the things he has seen me do and the things he’s done.” Rick explained. “I’m scared he’s almost too far gone. I had to get him to adapt so he could survive but what if I’ve lost him? What if I’ve lost my boy?”

“You haven’t. You’re here and he’s here. He’s just becoming a man.” Abraham told him sternly. “Listen, Rick. I tried to shelter my family from what the world was becoming and I lost them. Two damn years into this damned shit show of a world and your boy’s alive. Dry your eyes, you’re father of the year.”

Rick didn’t respond right away. He was struggling with the conflicting thoughts that were swirling violently around his mind. Carl wasn’t the sweet, innocent little boy he used to be. He was becoming a man, a fact Rick himself had noted before. His son was a survivor of the apocalypse, capable of killing people and walkers alike. He was always learning from everyone, becoming stronger and better each day and for the last couple months had been defended by his own personal guardian. Jason, the young man Carl himself had found alone in the world when Rick was in a coma. The young man that had come through for them time and time again and who was willing to lay his life down for Carl. Carl couldn’t be too far gone, like Rick and everyone else, he was just becoming the hardened soldier he needed to be.

“Yo! Abraham! You down here?” Daryl’s voice called from the corridors outside.

“In the private office managing my accounts!” Abraham called back to the archer.

“You seen Rick?” The next question sounded.

“He’s with me.” Abraham responded, standing up straight.

“Find anything?” Daryl asked them as he opened the office door.

“Sweet fuck all.” Abraham confirmed with a smirk. “Let’s go.”

 

Jason stood across the street from the infirmary, staring at the building as if the outside walls would give him the answers to the questions he had. He knew Carl was lying in there, still heavily injured and deeply confused about everything thanks to his memory loss. He knew he could go in and just tell Carl everything or at least tell him what he meant to him, how important the younger teen was for Jason’s survival. Jason considered it but his feet refused to move, as if his shoes were made of lead.

Jason had been through so much in the last two years it was a surprise to him that he was still standing. The brutal fights he had endured before the apocalypse, his work at the Big Cat Sanctuary where he could have been killed by one of the animals on any given day and then the outbreak itself. He remembered the chaos and confusion of the first few weeks where no one knew what was going on or who the violent cannibals were. His father had been the one to keep him alive and get him to wise up to what was going on as soon as possible.

After his parents died, he hadn’t been sure if he could keep going. However, with Kellin by his side he had unlimited wells of strength and he had someone to fight for. They somehow managed to survive and encountered Carlos and his group. That group, led by the soldier was their lucky break and gave them time to adapt to the new world. Unfortunately, all good things come to an end and on the worst night of his life, walkers invaded the camp and one of them managed to bite Kellin. Jason would never forget Kellin’s final moments, slowly fading away in his arms.

After losing Kellin, he had assumed his chances of survival would have fallen faster than a burning spitfire yet he continued to live. Survival had become a habit for him, it wasn’t something he consciously worked at anymore. That all changed when he met Carl, the inquisitive and dangerously cute teenage survivor. Their relationship wasn’t forced and Jason never truly pursued the younger teen as he had believed him to be off limits in every single sense. However, fate decided to take a shine towards him and allowed for him to have Carl.

After everything they went through, after all the love they had for one another, Jason had found himself incapable of doing what was right. When Ron attacked Carl, he should have killed the psychotic teen on the spot, walkers be damned. He didn’t, he had trusted Carl’s judgement and not his own instincts. The price of that mistake had been Carl’s near death and horrible disfigurement that has left him with rather severe memory loss. Jason knew he was always going to feel tremendous guilt every time he looked at Carl. Perhaps that was the real reason he couldn’t go inside and talk to him. He knew he’d have to tell Carl that it was his fault and earn his hatred when he looks in the mirror for the first time.

Jason let out a shaky breath as his emotions threatened to overwhelm him. It was starting to get dark as the sun went down, casting red and purple streaks in the sky. From where he stood he could see the front gate opening and heard a car driving in, which presumably belonged to Rick, Daryl and Abraham. Jason shoved his hands into his jacket pockets and headed back towards their house.

 

Denise was true to her word, the next morning she agreed that Carl was well enough to leave the infirmary and go home. There were strict rules surrounding it, however, as Carl was forbidden from doing anything too strenuous or stressful for the next couple weeks and could only take the bandage off to clean it or replace it with a new one. He also had to report back to the infirmary frequently to clean the wound and to do check-ups.

Rick and Carl stepped out onto the infirmary porch, the sheriff hat taking its rightful place on Carl’s head yet again. Between the hat and his long hair, his bandages were well concealed unless he looked straight on at someone. Rick kept one hand on Carl’s back, conscious of how his son was walking on unsteady footing. This became evident when Carl, in an attempt to walk normally, lost his footing on the porch steps and nearly fell if it weren’t for Rick catching him.

“Easy, Carl.” Rick soothed. “Let’s take it slow, alright?”

“I’m okay.” Carl retorted through embarrassment.

Rick let the tone slide and walked with his son. “I was really worried about you, we all were.”

“Dad, if I had died, you would have been okay, right?” Carl questioned softly. “Like, I know you would have been sad but you would have moved on, right? Like I had to with mum.”

Rick froze and stopped in front of Carl, placing his hands on his son’s shoulders so he could stare right into his eye. Carl’s comments shocked him but they weren’t completely unexpected.

“Carl, if I had lost you I would have been absolutely devastated!” Rick exclaimed truthfully. “I could never move on from that and neither could…”

Carl was quick to catch Rick trailing off. “Neither could who?”

Rick shook his head, remembering Jason forcing him to promise. “It doesn’t matter. The point is I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if something happened to you.”

“But I moved on from mum because I’m strong, like she said I was.” Carl countered, somewhat confused. “People die all the time now so we need to always be okay, right?”

Rick shook his head. “That’s not what strength is, Carl. Sadness isn’t weakness so you shouldn’t ignore it. You miss mum, we both do, same way we miss everyone else and that’s okay.”

“Then what makes us strong?” Carl asked, struggling to understand as his head continued to pound painfully.

“Adapting makes us strong. We don’t hide our sadness when we lose people we love but we don’t give up either.” Rick told his son. “We learn from them and we keep living. That’s what strength is. Living with it all and not letting it change you into something you’re not.”

“Oh…” Carl gasped as it started making sense. “So, it’s okay for me to be sad?”

“Of course, it is.” Rick rasped quickly. “Carl, I want you to promise me something.”

“What?” Carl asked, looking back at his father nervously.

“Promise me you’ll let yourself feel things, you’ll be yourself instead of trying to be so damn strong, okay?” Rick asked of him, hugging his son tightly. “Just, be yourself, whoever that is now.”

Carl hugged back and nodded. “I promise.”

 

Jason lay back on the sofa in the living room, glancing out the window from time to time between writing notes in his diary. There were a lot of thoughts and feelings he needed to process and he found writing to be the best method. There were plenty of fond memories hidden within the pages that he used to give himself some relief from the constant turmoil he was going through. He counted his tally marks, he made them every morning since Kellin’s death and the total shocked him. It had been 233 days since Kellin died.

He slammed his diary shut and sat up when he heard the front door open. Judging by the light gasps of acknowledgement made by Michonne and Carol, it was clear who had walked in. Rick had gone to the infirmary to bring Carl home so it had to be them returning. Rick’s rasp of “welcome home” confirmed it. Before he knew it, Jason had catapulted himself off the sofa so he could greet Carl as well.

“Hey.” Jason quickly greeted. “It’s great to see you back on your feet.”

Carl stared in confusion at the greeting. He knew his Dad would live with him and Michonne wasn’t much of a surprise. Carol stood in the kitchen and Daryl was out on the porch so their appearances weren’t a surprise either. Carol and Daryl had been with them since the first camp. Jason’s appearance was a surprise, however.

Carl took his time to study the older teen in front of him. He could take in more details as he wasn’t as groggy as before. Jason stood around Rick’s height, dressed in jeans and a strangely familiar leather jacket, his gun and machete holstered on his thigh and belt respectively. His hair was shorter than last time so he must have got it cut sometime the day before. Carl found Jason’s eyes to be piercing, as if they were staring into his very soul, which was intimidating but also exciting. He was somewhat captivated by the teen for reasons beyond his understanding for the time being.

“You live with us?” He finally stuttered out, conscious of how long he had been silent.

“Is that a problem?” Jason asked, smirking.

Carl felt oddly nervous around the older teen. “No…I just…”

“I know.” Jason interrupted understandingly. “You didn’t remember.”

“Yeah…” Carl rasped out, still staring at him.

“There’s probably gonna be a lot of that for a while.” Jason replied and looked at the others. “How about we have some breakfast, lunch, brunch, whatever, and I’ll try and fill in the gaps?”

 

A short while later and they were all seated at the dining table. Carol sat at the top of the table while Rick and Michonne sat opposite one another. Jason sat next to Michonne and Carl sat next to Rick, both of the teens also opposite one another. Daryl had decided to go on guard duty down at the expansion instead of joining them.

Carl groaned in frustration as he missed his mouth while trying to eat. He was still getting used to having only one eye and the lack of depth perception was really starting to show. Jason didn’t know whether to cry for him or laugh in amusement when Carl knocked over his glass for the fourth time, the glass was fortunately empty after having knocked it over the previous three times. The older teen had the urge to help feed him but he was pretty sure Carl wouldn’t be okay with that even with his memory. He was stubborn that way.

“Now that you’re a bit more up to speed, I can finally get around to how we met.” Jason told the younger teen after Michonne and Rick had explained how the prison was lost.

“Okay.” Carl replied, carefully making sure he didn’t miss his mouth this time.

“Well, your Dad was in a coma and you were out scavenging on your own. You came across this walker that was a bit too strong for you.” Jason explained. “I heard you struggling and came to help you.”

“So, you rescued me?” Carl questioned, feeling embarrassed at having to be rescued from a single walker.

Jason shook his head. “No, you managed to shut it into a bedroom. I met you on the landing and we talked. A little later, we spent the afternoon sitting on a rooftop while you ate this huge can of chocolate pudding.”

“Did I not give you any?” Carl asked, surprisingly annoyed at his past self for not giving food to someone who helped him.

Jason laughed lightly. “You offered to but I refused. I could tell you had been through a lot and you deserved it more.”

“Oh.” Carl simply responded, finding it surprisingly sweet of Jason to have done that.

“That morning, your Dad here wasn’t too happy with me being around.” Jason continued the story. “Stuck his revolver barrel right against my forehead, threatening to kill me if I tried anything.”

“We were alone, couldn’t be too careful.” Rick shrugged when he felt Carl shift his gaze to him.

“And like I said at the time, if I was that way inclined I would have killed you while you slept.” Jason reminded Rick before continuing. “Anyway, later that morning, Michonne found the house we were staying in.”

“So, we’ve all been together since then?” Carl asked, trying to make sense of everything.

“Pretty much.” Jason replied, smiling softly. “We found the others shortly after that at Terminus.”

“Terminus…” Carl repeated the name as his head pounded again, forcing him to hold it in his hand.

“Carl?” Jason and Michonne spoke at the same time.

“Some of it’s coming back.” Rick explained to them. “Denise said this would happen sometimes.”

_Jason made it to the top of the stairs just as he heard one of the bedroom doors slam shut. He aimed his gun at the direction of the noise and studied the sight before him. With their back against the door as they tried to catch their breath was a boy. He couldn’t be any older than sixteen. He had a gun holster on the right thigh of his jeans but no gun. His dirty top was blue and grey. His long dark hair whipped out from under the sheriff’s hat he wore but the most striking thing was that he only had one boot on. Before Jason could make any more observations, the boy froze as he finally became aware of Jason’s presence. He didn’t say anything. His eyes darted to his gun that lay on the floor, too far away to reach quickly. He stared back at Jason with an intense look of fear in his blue eyes._

_Sensing that the boy was afraid of him, Jason decided to attempt communication but kept his gun aimed at the boy._

_“Hey, kid.” He said calmly. “You okay?”_

_The boy stared at him for a moment, his breath still uneven. “I’m not a kid.”_

_Jason smirked but didn’t lower his aim. “Yeah, well you aren’t a man yet either.”_

_The boy didn’t answer him, unsure of how to respond._

_“What’s your name?” Jason asked him, trying to keep his tone friendly._

_The boy appeared to hesitate for a moment before finally answering. “Carl.”_

_“A tally? You mean to keep count?” Carl asked, confused._

_“Yeah.” Jason answered simply._

_“Keep count of what? Days?” Carl asked, trying to make sense of it._

_“Yeah. Days since it happened.” Jason answered, his voice low._

_“Since all this started?” Carl asked._

_“No.” Jason replied softly, the familiar lump in his throat forming again._

_Carl was about to ask what it was. He guessed it would be the fifth killing but he couldn’t assume that. He needed to ask. Just as he was about to, there was a knock on the door downstairs._

_Jason and Carl looked at each other with anxiety before heading down the stairs together as quietly as possible. Both of them had their handguns drawn and were aiming at the door as they reached the ground floor. Rick already had his revolver in his hand and was looking through the eyehole. He turned around and sat back down, his back resting against the door as he grinned from ear to ear, a light chuckle sounding._

_Carl looked at his father in confusion, wondering what could make his dad laugh at a time like this._

_“What?” He whispered anxiously._

_Rick grinned at his son._

_“It’s for you.”_

_Carl considered something. He debated in his mind whether or not he should ask Michonne a question that had been nagging away at him all day. He let out a sight. It wouldn’t hurt to ask, especially after how open Michonne had been with him._

_“How…how do you know if you…you know…like someone?” He asked, hesitant. What would she think of him? She was perceptive so she would either figure out his reasons for asking right away or get the totally wrong idea._

_Michonne couldn’t help but smile. The question had come out of nowhere but it also made sense for Carl to ask. She assumed he had probably never had any relationships because of the apocalypse. If he was asking this now, then that meant he liked someone but the options were extremely limited. She and Rick couldn’t possibly be options, she prayed it wasn’t the case as that would be strange. That left Jason but he was a few years older than Carl and Carl didn’t appear to be gay. Not that it mattered in this world._

_“Well, you enjoy their company. You find them attractive, catch yourself admiring their face or their body.” Michonne explained, not feeling the need to be subtle. “You can be protective of them. You want to spend time with them, to be close to them, touch them, kiss them and other things.”_

_Carl looked down, his hat obscuring his face from view as he thought about it. That did sound about right and would explain the things he saw in movies his mother used to watch. It also explained the actions and connection that Glenn and Maggie appeared to share. So, that’s what liking someone was._

_As Carl stuffed the can back into his bag something caught Rick’s attention. Pinned to the side of an abandoned train cart was a large sign. They all walked over for a closer look as a map was pinned just below the sign. They all read it. Rick and Michonne shared glances._

_“What do you think?” Michonne asked him._

_“Let’s go.” Rick stated, taking the bandage off his hand and tossing it to the ground. “Let’s go.”_

_Jason stood next to the sign and read it one last time._

_TERMINUS. SANCTUARY FOR ALL. COMMUNITY FOR ALL. THOSE WHO ARRIVE SURVIVE._

_“Hey Rick?” Jason called out, causing the trio to stop walking. Rick stared back at him._

_“What’s the verdict?” Jason asked, his arms splayed out and hands open by his sides. “Do you trust me now? Am I allowed to come with you?”_

_Carl looked up at his father’s face. He didn’t think this was still an issue but it obviously was. They were out of the house. They were on the road. Rick had almost fully recovered. Jason wasn’t needed anymore. His heart rate increased. He wanted Jason to stay with them and was mentally preparing an argument should his father say no._

_Rick smiled at the young man and nodded._

_“You’re one of us.”_

Carl slowly opened his eye, not remembering when he had closed it to find Jason, Michonne and Carol all staring at him in concern. His father’s arm was wrapped around him as he too kept his gaze fixated on his injured son, checking for any sign that would indicate something had gone wrong.

“You had a son, Michonne.” Carl rasped as his thoughts started to clear. “I’m remembering things. You lost him. Jason, you lost someone too, someone really important…”

“Andre.” Michonne replied, her lip quivering. “His name was Andre Anthony.”

Jason’s breath caught in his throat at the reference to Kellin before he nodded. “Yeah, I did. Kellin.”

Carl thought about the name Jason just mentioned. He knew that person was important but they weren’t a brother or a friend. Another sharp sting to his head provided him with the answer. Kellin had been Jason’s boyfriend. Jason was bisexual. He had confessed that to Carl one night in the house Michonne found them. Details were starting to come back. Some of those details were extremely interesting to Carl, especially the concept of liking people of the same sex. He had forgotten that was even possible.

 

The rest of the day passed by quickly. Jason had yet again kept away from Carl by helping with the expansion, much like Daryl, Abraham and several others. The walls were being reinforced as they added to the expansion, making sure they would be safer against another herd or an attack from living people again. On Rick’s recommendation, they had changed the walls so the supporting stilts were on the inside instead of the outside. This change sacrificed defensive strength for practicality, as it took away the climbing option the Wolves had used to get inside the walls.

Carl had fallen asleep at the dining table where he had been reading a comic. The comic had been an older one in his collection but he obviously hadn’t remembered what happened and decided to enjoy it once more. Rick and Michonne sat on the sofa together in the living room, keeping an eye on Carl as he slept and looking out the window in anticipation of Jason’s return.

“He’s going to be okay.” Michonne told Rick softly.

“Yeah, I think he will be.” Rick rasped back. “As much as any of us will be.”

“We’re all going to be okay.” Michonne reassured him. “We fought to get this place back and now it’s ours again. We can have a life here.”

“When he was still in the coma, I promised him that I’d change things.” Rick explained to the samurai. “That I’d make a new world for him, one where something like that will never have to happen again. “

“We can make that happen, all of us.” Michonne agreed. “The walkers won’t exist forever and we’re strong enough to defend ourselves against the living.”

“No, listen. I’ve been trying to change things, change the way people think and act, get us working together to make that safer world.” Rick continued. “But the more I think about it, the more I realise that’s a world I no longer belong in.”

Rick knew this confession would seem strange to Michonne but after everything that had happened he found it hard to trust anyone or anything. His son had almost died due to his lack of foresight. How long would it be until another Ron popped up? Someone mentally or emotionally unstable and therefore too dangerous to keep around, no matter how nice they otherwise were. Rick would want them dead, especially in a safe, peaceful world.

“Rick, that’s nonsense.” Michonne argued. “We’ve all done things, that’s why we’re still here. We’re the ones who live.”

“Are you sure?” Rick asked, staring at her. “I feel like I died a long time ago.”

“Death doesn’t affect people like it used to anymore.” Michonne quipped with a small smirk.

The two of them stared at each other for a few moments, listening to the sounds of chatter outside and Carl’s heavy breaths as he slept. They both still had more to say but neither could find the strength to move or speak, as if they were paralyzed by one another. The spell was suddenly broken when the front door opened, sending them both scurrying apart like children caught misbehaving.

“Jason, how’s the expansion coming?” Rick asked, standing up to further distance himself from Michonne.

“As well as can be, I guess.” Jason shrugged, glancing over to Carl. “Has he been asleep long?”

“About half an hour.” Michonne answered. “We were about to wake him.”

Jason nodded. “I’ll help him to his room.”

“You mean your room.” Rick corrected, a subtle nudge to convince Jason to tell Carl the truth.

Jason ignored him, however, and made his way over to the dining table. He grabbed the comic and folded in the corner of the page that Carl had fallen asleep on before placing a hand on his shoulder and shaking him. It took a few strong shakes to rouse the boy from his slumber.

“…Jason?” Carl asked groggily, opening his eye.

“Comfy there?” Jason asked sarcastically.

“Not really.” The younger teen responded, moving his neck which had become stiff.

“I’ll help you up to your bed.” Jason offered as Carl got out of the chair and stood at full height.

Jason walked with Carl to the staircase before taking hold of his arm. Carl felt like protesting but the first missed step cancelled the protest immediately. The two teens headed up the stairs slowly and carefully together. Once they reached the landing, Jason guided them into their shared room. He sighed quietly, knowing that until Carl got his full memory back this room would just be Carl’s room. He couldn’t slip into bed beside him no matter how badly he wanted to.

“Well, here we are.” Jason remarked to fill the silence. “I’m sure you can manage from here.”

“Are you sure this is my room?” Carl asked, looking at the en-suite bathroom and king sized bed.

“Yeah, why wouldn’t it be?” Jason questioned with his hands on his hips.

“This bed is too big for me.” Carl commented. “This isn’t your room, is it?”

Jason shook his head and lied. “No, I have one of the other rooms. Your dad’s room is just down the hall.”

“Okay.” Carl replied weakly. Some nagging thought in the back of his head told him Jason was lying through his teeth.

“I’ll see you in the morning, then?” Jason commented as he headed for the door. “I’m assuming you don’t need any help getting changed or anything.”

Carl felt his stomach flip at Jason’s comment. He was utterly confused by the strange, nerve-racking sensation that flooded through him from such an innocent remark. The sensation was compounded by the strange but subtle tension in the air. There was something Jason wasn’t telling him, he knew it in his bones but he couldn’t find the courage to ask him what it was.

“I’ll be fine, thanks.” Carl finally spoke, making sure he didn’t stutter and give away how nervous he was. “Good night.”

“Good night.” Jason replied, fighting the habit to follow up the statement with a declaration of love.

Jason stood in the doorway a few moments longer as Carl turned around and tried to sort things out. He left his hat on an empty chair and pulled back the covers of the bed. When the one-eyed teen reached down to pull his shirt off, exposing some of the smooth skin underneath, Jason quickly left the room and closed the door behind him. His heart was pounding in his chest. He wanted Carl even more now that he couldn’t have him. He hoped that if a God existed, it would do him the favour of restoring Carl’s memory overnight.

He made his way back downstairs to find the house was dark and quiet. Rick and Michonne had obviously already retired to bed along with Carol, Daryl and Morgan. He cursed himself for lying to Carl about having another room but it would be wrong to go back upstairs and disturb him with the truth. Jason sighed and plopped himself down on the sofa, lying back and resting his forearm on his forehead. He was in for a very difficult time.

 

Jason groaned in his sleep as he rolled over before hissing sharply in pain when his arm caught the edge of the coffee table. His other hand shot out to grab his forearm and clutch it as the pain throbbed through the limb and roused him from his slumber. He opened his eyes slowly, the sudden exposure to daylight momentarily blinding him as his sleepy eyes adjusted. He was uncomfortable and his neck was sore from the sleeping position he had been in.

After a few moments of staring at the ceiling above him, he recalled where he was and why. He had fallen asleep on the sofa because Carl had lost his memory, preventing Jason from sleeping with him as he usually would. He hoped that more of the younger teen’s memory may have returned to him overnight so Jason could stop pretending to be anything less than his other half.

The subtle thudding of approaching footsteps forced the teen to sit up and look behind the sofa at the main room. Morgan stood in the centre of the front room, having frozen upon spotting Jason appear from behind the back of the sofa. The black pacifist had his stick in hand, unknowingly giving birth to an idea in Jason’s mind.

“Morning, Morgan.” Jason greeted with a yawn. “Going out for morning practice?”

“Morning.” Morgan greeted quietly. “And yeah, why?”

“Do you have any spare sticks?” Jason asked, standing up and cracking his back and neck.

“I can make you one, if that’s what you’re asking.” Morgan responded. “But, why do you want to learn?”

Jason shrugged. “I don’t really. I just want to attack something or someone for a while. Figured you could defend yourself in a stick fight.”

“Aikido isn’t about that.” Morgan argued, not wanting Jason to get the wrong idea.

“I know.” Jason retorted quickly. “But this is better than beating walkers to death outside the walls.”

Morgan stared at the younger man for a few moments before finally nodding.

 

Rick and Michonne stood in the infirmary while Denise helped Carl. They had brought him in for a check-up and to allow the young doctor to show them how to clean his wound and bandage. The pair of them struggled and had to avert their gaze when she unwrapped Carl’s bandages and removed the eye-patch, revealing his horrendous wound. Their reactions didn’t go unnoticed by Carl, who also saw the slightly queasy expression Denise always wore when tending to him, though she was far subtler about it. It hurt to have people look at him in such a way.

“Washing the bandage is fairly straight forward.” Denise explained, guiding Rick and Michonne over to the stove where she had a pot of boiling water. “Boil the water and then wait for it to cool to room temperature. Rinse the bandage in the water without stretching it or pulling it in any way then leave it on a clean, flat surface to dry.”

Rick and Michonne nodded as they took notes in their heads so they didn’t forget the procedure. They followed Denise back over to Carl as she carried a pot of lukewarm water with her.

“He’s still got some sutures in so to clean the wound you have to be very careful.” She explained. “Again, boil the water beforehand and add some antibacterial soap for a sudsy mix. Wet the cloth and then ring it out until its damp.”

Denise rung out the cloth as she explained this to them before standing in front of Carl. She gave the teen a hushed warning about how it might sting before she began dabbing his eye injury with the damp cloth. She was extremely careful of the sutures and extremely soft flesh that remained on the interior of the eye socket as she continued cleaning away dried blood and puss from the wound. She was surprised by how silent Carl was, sitting with his other eye closed and responding only with the occasional wince.

“Why isn’t Jason here?” Michonne whispered to Rick, backing up further out of Carl’s hearing range.

“You know why.” Rick rasped. “Carl doesn’t remember who he really is.”

“That’s not an excuse.” Michonne retorted. “He’s in pain. Jason should be here.”

“It might be easier to get Carl to remember him.” Rick commented. “He already remembers a lot more than he did yesterday. He remembers people from before.”

“Maybe Jason should finally remind him.” Michonne argued.

“Give him time.” Rick tried to defend his son’s boyfriend as best he could. “This is hard for him as well.”

“If he doesn’t tell Carl soon then I will.” Michonne threatened. “Carl shouldn’t be going through this alone.”

Rick tilted his head at her in disappointment. “He’s not alone.”

“You know what I mean.” Michonne pressed. “Where is Jason anyway?”

“I don’t know.” Rick rasped back just as Denise declared that she was finished cleaning the wound.

 

The sound of wood crashing against wood echoed by the solar panels of Alexandria as Jason unleashed a wild assault on Morgan. Morgan had crafted a new Aikido stick for Jason to use and was currently blocking and deflecting every swing from the young man. Jason growled as he gripped the stick tightly in two hands and continued to swing wildly, changing direction and angle constantly in an effort to catch Morgan off-guard.

Jason had to admit it, whoever taught Morgan how to fight with the stick must have been brilliant because he couldn’t penetrate the other man’s defences. Jason jumped and swung the stick down vertically but Morgan blocked it by thrusting his stick out horizontally. He then changed angles and pushed Jason’s stick away effortlessly, spinning the younger man in the process. The frustrated novice let go of the stick with his left hand and held it in his right as he spun himself 270 degrees to take another horizontal swing at his opponent. Morgan’s vertical stick blocked this attack too before pushing Jason’s stick away again.

Jason growled as he charged in with more swings. “Fight back, dammit! Fight me, Morgan!”

Morgan refused to fight back right away and continued to block and deflect the vicious assault. “You’ve got a lot of anger. Why?”

“Isn’t it fucking obvious?” Jason roared as he swung faster, keeping himself moving forward and forcing Morgan back.

Morgan didn’t respond and simply continued blocking each strike, each loud clack ringing in his ears as he defended himself expertly. He suddenly took Jason by surprise by ducking under one of his strikes and smacking the younger man in the back with his own stick, sending him stumbling forward.

Jason spun back around and gripped the stick tighter before jumping in with a spear-like jab which Morgan side-stepped. The pacifist expertly blocked the follow-up swing that he predicted Jason would throw out in his ignorance of the art of Aikido. The younger man growled in frustration as he panted for breath, unlike Morgan who was calm.

“I failed him! I broke a promise and for that I should be the one with a hole in my face!” Jason bellowed in self-loathing as he threw out a surprise kick which was also blocked. “He doesn’t even remember me. Why would he? Why would you remember someone who lied about protecting you?”

Morgan narrowed his eyes angrily and countered Jason’s next attack with a firm strike to his side. The younger man snarled and swung repeatedly but Morgan deflected both hits before smacking Jason’s side again. When he tried to attack again, Morgan side-stepped and slipped his stick under Jason’s legs before flicking it up and tripping him, sending him crashing onto his back with a cough.

“You didn’t fail him. Some things are out of your control. It’s not your fault when things like that happen.” Morgan told him, pinning him down with his stick. “You’ve been helping him since then. Helping the community, getting him medicine and taking out those walkers.”

“He doesn’t remember me, Morgan.” Jason rasped, letting go of his stick and holding his face. “It’s so hard being a stranger to him.”

“Then stop being a stranger.” Morgan countered wisely. “Until he remembers you, what matters is how you treat him now. Who you are to him now is just as important as who you were to him.”

Jason was about to respond when a loud bark interrupted them as Brodie bounded over. However, Brodie wasn’t playful this time as he stood over Jason’s body and growled up at Morgan, baring his teeth at the man with uncharacteristic aggression. Morgan understood that the usually playful pup thought he was harming Jason and respectfully backed off, though this didn’t stop Brodie from growling.

“Brodie!” Trisha yelled. “Stop it!”

Jason wriggled out from underneath the Labrador and petted him gently. “Easy, pup. It’s okay.”

The chocolate Labrador looked back and forth between Jason, Trisha and Morgan before the aggressive expression fell. Brodie licked his nose before tentatively walking up to Morgan to sniff him and see if he could be trusted. Morgan kneeled and let Brodie do all the investigating he needed to.

“Sorry about that.” Trisha apologised, catching her breath. “Ever since the Wolves attacked he’s gotten quite protective.”

“It’s okay.” Morgan assured her. “It’s better that way.”

“That reminds me, Jason.” Trisha announced with her hands on her hips. “Are these lessons happening or not?”

“Sorry, Trish.” Jason apologised. “You know how things have been recently.”

“I don’t care.” The older woman retorted sharply. “Keep your damn promise.”

Jason sighed. “Alright, alright. I’ll start them this afternoon but I’ll need help.”

“What do you need?” Morgan was quick to ask, happy to help.

Jason shook his head. “Not you. You don’t have the hardware.”

 

Leaves crackled as they were crushed under booted feet as Jason and Michonne walked through the woods outside Alexandria together. Michonne kept one hand on the handle of her sword, ready to unsheathe it at any time while Jason kept one of his hands on the handle of his machete and the other on his holstered handgun. Stuffed in the back of Jason’s belt was one of the orange flare guns, should anything go wrong while they were outside the community.

The woods were peaceful. The leaves in the branches above provided shade from the merciless heat of the sun and rustled gently in the breeze. Hidden in the trees were the ever-present birds who never failed to sing their daily chorus. It was too peaceful for Jason’s liking as they were out there to hunt walkers. He needed them for his lessons.

“Why won’t you tell Carl the truth?” Michonne asked, breaking the silence as they walked.

“You know why.” Jason responded, referring to what he originally said to Rick.

Michonne stopped walking. “That’s an excuse. Not a reason.”

Jason stopped his own walking and looked over his shoulder at the samurai. She stood in place, one hand still on the katana while the other rested on her hip. He looked around before sighing and backing up, leaning back against a tree trunk before looking up at the birds as they sang above them.

“I’m scared. What if he doesn’t remember and thinks I’m lying?” Jason swallowed heavily as he opened up to Michonne. “Or what if he just falls out of love or blames me for breaking my promise to protect him that night?”

“You really think that after everything we’ve all been through?” Michonne asked him with a disappointed tone.

Jason shrugged. “It could happen.”

“But it might not.” Michonne countered. “You can’t run from something that might never happen.”

“I still broke that promise.” Jason looked back at her. “And that guilt is eating away at me. I couldn’t keep Kellin safe and it looks like I can’t keep Carl safe either.”

“Really?” Michonne questioned in surprise. “And how many times have you saved him?”

Jason furrowed his brow as he stared back at her, thinking. “I…I don’t know.”

“Because you didn’t stop to think about all those times.” Michonne told him firmly. “We’re all to blame for what happened that night but you should know better than to expect him to judge you for it.”

“I knew about Ron.” Jason retorted quickly. “He attacked Carl in the garage. I wanted to kill him for it and I didn’t.”

“You didn’t know what was going to happen.” Michonne corrected him. “You have to stop punishing yourself. You can’t change the past.”

“Oh, don’t I know it…” Jason lamented, looking back up at the tree tops.

“Jason, if Carl’s memory doesn’t come back then you’re never going to be close to him by acting like this.” Michonne argued calmly. “And if his memory does come back, he’ll wonder why you weren’t there for him.”

Jason looked back at her again, slowly realising that she was right. Morgan had said the same thing. If Carl’s memory didn’t come back, there was nothing stopping him simply getting to know him again. Things could possibly turn out almost the same as before.

“Before she died, Deanna asked me to think about what I want.” Michonne continued. “Perhaps you should think about that too.”

“I want Carl to be safe and happy.” Jason admitted, letting out a shuddering breath. “And I want to be a part of that.”

“Then perhaps it’s time for you to start making an effort.” Michonne suggested.

“Yeah, you’re right.” Jason sighed. “Thanks, Michonne.”

Michonne smiled and stepped towards him, ushering him into a comforting hug. They had all been through a lot in the last while and though it didn’t take the pain away, sometimes a gentle embrace did what words could not.

“You know, at times like this I wish my Dad were still here.” Jason mused as they broke apart. “He always knew what to do or say in a situation. I keep hoping that maybe one day I’ll be half the man he was.”

“I think you already are.” Michonne complimented him gently.

Jason was about to respond but he was interrupted by the hungry snarl of an approaching walker. Michonne unsheathed her sword as Jason grabbed some supplies out of his jacket pockets. This was what they had come outside to do and it was time to get to work.

 

The walkers snarled from where they were tied to the support beams of the solar panels. There were two of them, one much fresher than the other. The fresh walker had been a man, probably in his late thirties when he was bitten on his right bicep. It snarled louder than the other one, which was a heavily decomposed woman.

Jason rubbed his hands together as he stood in front of the hungry corpses and addressed his small class for the lessons. The residents in front of him were some of the few people who hadn’t helped defend Alexandria from the massive herd the night Carl was shot. Trisha was probably the keenest among them as the lessons had been demanded by her. Next to her stood Anna, who had taken care of Judith that night. Also, there was Jake, the young construction worker, Denise who had expressed a sudden interest in learning and finally Mikey, Ron’s old friend and his mother, Paula.

“So, today we’re going to cover the basics of killing walkers and living people.” Jason began, glancing between the walkers and his class. “I know they’re scary but they’re only dangerous if you don’t know what you’re doing or are outnumbered.”

This commentary did nothing to shake some of them out of their fearful gazes.

“First thing is first, living people are by far more dangerous. There are more options when it comes to killing them.” Jason explained, feeling a slight pang in his chest. “Blunt head trauma or the severing of an artery is usually enough to kill a person. But you should always finish it with a headshot so they don’t reanimate.”

Jason took a moment to breathe as the pang in his chest started hurting a little more. He stood next to the fresh male walker and pointed out various weak points of the human body with his knife. The thighs, the abdomen, the heart, the throat and eyes. He took the time to explain the different kill methods depending on the weapon they were using.

“In a situation where it is kill or be killed, you cannot afford to hesitate.” He continued. “The Wolves didn’t hesitate to kill the people we knew and loved, so we couldn’t hesitate in killing them.”

“I wish we didn’t have to know how to kill people.” Mikey muttered nervously.

Jason caught his gaze with a glare. “We all wish the world wasn’t the way it is but unfortunately this is life now. You need to get your shit together.”

“Language, please.” Paula interjected sharply.

“Death, walkers, psychopaths, weapons, supplies, shelter, survival.” Jason listed off nonchalantly.

“What are you doing?” The confused mother asked.

“Listing things that are far more important than words you don’t like.” Jason retorted as he walked back over to the walkers. “Can I get on with my lesson?”

Paula’s grumbled silence was the only answer that Jason needed before heading over to the decomposed walkers. He pointed out the head, the eyes and ears as possible attack points. Jason went on to explain that knocking walkers down could also make things easier but the most important things were avoiding their mouths and always attacking the head or neck.

“It’s all well and good telling us this and we could practice but they’re tied up.” Trisha commented, hands on her hips. “Sort of makes it too easy and it’s not the same as out there.”

Jason looked at his students with narrowed eyes and thought for a moment. “You’re right. Knives at the ready, then.”

They all looked at him in slight confusion as they tried to anticipate what he had planned. None of them could have predicted what Jason did next. He unsheathed his machete and cut the ropes that bound both walkers, stepping back behind them as the corpses stumbled towards his students.

“Only headshots kill them, use your knives on their foreheads, eyes or ears!” Jason barked commands at them. “Knock them down if you have to but don’t let them grab or bite you!”

Paula pushed Mikey behind her back as she held her knife up in a shaky hand, watching as the rotting female walker stumbled over to her hungrily, rasping loudly. She was frozen on the spot with terror as Anna had already ran away from them. Suddenly, Jake and Denise were the ones to step up. Denise shoulder-barged the walker, knocking it to the ground as Jake stabbed it straight through the temple with his knife.

“Yes! That’s it!” Jason called, impressed with their teamwork.

A scream turned his attention back to Trisha, who was backing away from the walker as it closed the gap between them. It grabbed her shoulders and pushed her onto her back, winding the school teacher as she fought to keep the snarling corpse from biting her, its jaws snapping at her desperately. Jake and Denise prepared to help but Jason stopped them with a wave of his arm.

“Come on, Trisha!” Jason called, giving her advice. “Hold its neck with one hand and stab it in the head as fast as you can!”

“Help me, for God’s sake!” Trisha shrieked as it continued snapping at her.

“You can do this!” Jason called back. “Now do it!”

Trisha felt her arms burn as the walker’s dead weight continued to press down on top of her. The stench of its rotting flesh was unbearable as it continued snapping at her, staring down with scary, milky eyes. Trisha gasped in terror as the walker dropped lower when she moved her left hand to its throat, holding it in place before she stabbed it in the head as hard as she could. The knife went through its skull with surprising ease as the walker stilled and dropped down onto her. She groaned in disgust as she rolled it off her and stood up on shaky legs, feeling queasy.

“See! I knew you could do it!” Jason praised her, clapping his hands.

Trisha glared at him and swiftly slapped him across the face, surprising the young man. “I could have died!”

Jason rubbed his cheek before pointing down at the walker. “No, you couldn’t have. Michonne and I removed their fingertips and their teeth.”

“How?” Denise gasped in amazement.

“You don’t want to know.” Jason remarked. “Point is, none of you were in any real danger.”

Trisha exhaled slowly, her breath shuddering as she tried to calm herself down. She had truly believed she was moments from death and Jason had done nothing to protect her. In reality, he had lied to them all and had just played a game with them. She straightened herself up and slapped him again before wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him in for a tight hug.

Jason winced as his cheek burned but returned the hug in earnest, rubbing Trisha’s back softly as they stood there. He knew what he had done was a little underhanded but it had taught him who really needed to learn and who needed practice. It was the fastest way to get the job done. He winced again as the pain in his chest returned.

 

The wind blew stray leaves through the streets of Alexandria as the moonlight cast a silver glow onto the community, creating bizarre shadows in corners and on walls. The crickets chirped loudly, replacing the daily chorus of birds that usually interrupted the silence of the community.

Rick stood in the doorway of Carl’s bedroom, observing his son sitting up in bed reading one of his many comics. He had gone to bed hours before but had woken up due to broken sleep. That’s when he had noticed the light under the door.

“Carl, what are you doing?” He rasped softly, stepping into the room.

“Reading.” Carl answered curtly, not looking up from the comic.

“It’s late, son.” Rick commented. “You should try to sleep.”

“I know but…” Carl looked at his father’s tired gaze and realised there was no point in arguing. “Fine. Sorry.”

Carl put the comic back in his bedside drawer and lay down as Rick pulled the covers over him again. He didn’t need to as Carl was old enough to put himself to bed but it gave the former sheriff some comfort in doing things he used to do.

“How’s your eye?” Rick asked. “Did it hurt when Denise cleaned it?”

“A little…” Carl trailed off. “Don’t call it an eye. I don’t have an eye there anymore.”

“Sorry, I don’t know what to call it then.” Rick rasped back.

“It’s a hole. I have a giant hole in my head where my eye used to be!” Carl growled, glaring up at his father. “So, I’m going to call it a hole.”

“I know this is hard for you to deal with.” Rick replied gently. “But I’m just trying to help.”

“You don’t know anything.” Carl snarled as he turned back over.

“Excuse me?” Rick responded quickly, not having heard that tone since the loss of the prison.

“You don’t know how this feels! You don’t know what it’s like to see your face in the mirror and think its gross! You don’t know what it’s like to have people look at you in disgust!” Carl shouted angrily, spinning back round to face his father. “You don’t know how hard it is to read with one eye! Or pour a glass of water! You don’t know anything about what’s happened to me and you don’t know what it’s like to lose your memory!”

Rick was shocked and defenceless. “You’re right. I’m sorry, Carl.”

Carl continued to glare at his father with his remaining eye as the man made his way out of the bedroom and closed the door behind him. Rick leaned back against the door and rubbed his eyes as more tears threatened to make their exit. He just didn’t know how to deal with what Carl had gone through.

“I’ll talk to him.” Jason’s voice sounded from the darkness to Rick’s left.

Rick squinted his eyes as he tried to make out the shape of the younger man on the landing.

“Get some sleep, Rick.” Jason added. “You know he’s not angry at you, he’s just frustrated.”

Rick nodded in agreement and placed his hand on Jason’s shoulder, patting it gently before making his way back to his own room. Jason watched him go before taking a breath and opening Carl’s bedroom door, his bedroom door, and stepping inside.

“Hey.” Jason greeted lowly, just making out Carl’s shape thanks to the moonlight.

“What do you want?” Carl asked curtly.

“To talk.” Jason answered simply, walking over to the bed. “If you’ll let me.”

Carl sat up in bed, throwing the covers off his torso as he switched on the bedside lamp again. Both of them squinted as the sudden light assaulted their eyes. Carl took the moment to look at Jason who stood over him shirtless. In the light, he noticed things he hadn’t before, such as the older teen’s jawline, the scar on his cheek and the cut to his eyebrow that had almost healed. Carl cast his gaze downward, studying Jason’s slim body and taking note of the scar on his abdomen next to the faint outline of his abs. He was convinced he could see scars on Jason’s arm as well.

“So, talk.” Carl commanded, hoping he hadn’t been staring too long.

Jason sat down on the bed and clasped his hands, trying his best to ignore the fact that Carl was also topless and probably wasn’t wearing much under the covers. He hated that something that would usually excite him was now a battle of temptation that he couldn’t allow himself to lose.

“Well, I wanted to know how you were doing.” Jason began, not really knowing where to start.

“How do you think I’m doing?” Carl retorted.

Jason shrugged. “If I knew that, I wouldn’t have to ask.”

Carl sighed, relenting on his attitude a little. “It’s horrible. I look like a freak, like a walker.”

Jason bit back his initial comment, which would have pointed out that Carl would be the cutest walker ever in that case. He waited a moment as he thought about the best course of action. Carl obviously had serious self-image issues because of the injury.

“Could you show me?” Jason asked hesitantly.

Carl glared at him for a moment but Jason’s straight face showed he was serious. The younger teen sighed and with shaking hands started to unwrap his bandage. Jason watched patiently the entire time, noting just how nervous he was about his appearance. Once the bandage was off, Carl looked down to the floor and let his hair fall in front of it.

“I’m up here.” Jason remarked lightly before changing his tone. “It’s okay, I promise.”

Carl hesitated for a moment before finally raising his head to look at Jason, nervously tucking his hair behind his ear so that Jason could see the wound in full. The older teen couldn’t blame Carl for having issues, the injury was horrendous even after a week of treatment. Carl’s eyebrow was gone and the entire eye socket was badly deformed and jagged round the edges. The skin was badly scarred and discoloured while the inside of the wound, where his eye used to be, was a dark crimson sheet of soft flesh.

Carl watched as Jason observed every detail of his wound. The one thing that shocked him was that Jason hadn’t once cringed, winced or looked away. He was completely unfazed by the disgusting hole that had just been revealed to him. Carl took the time to notice other things about the older teen, like his piercing blue eyes and how his arm and shoulder muscles were well defined after surviving in the apocalyptic world. Jason looked strong enough to lift Carl clean off his feet and the younger teen didn’t know why that information was even crossing his mind.

“You don’t look like a walker.” Jason finally spoke, startling Carl. “You look like someone who is lucky to be alive after something so horrible.”

“I remember bits of it.” Carl commented as he started wrapping the bandage back up. “The thing I remember most is the animal that was there.”

“Animal?” Jason inquired, tilting his head.

“Yeah, after I was shot it roared.” Carl explained. “I’ve never heard anything like that before.”

Jason thought back to that awful night. “That wasn’t an animal, Carl. That was me.”

Carl sat up more, the covers sliding past his navel. “You?”

Jason bit his lip nervously and nodded. “Yeah, I thought you died and…”

“And what?” The younger teen pressed, leaning forward.

Jason closed his eyes. “And…it doesn’t matter. Because you’re still here.”

A silence fell between them as they stared at each other. Jason noticed that with Carl leaning forward like that, it would be easy to just lean over a little and capture his lips with his own. He was tempted to just go for it, to do anything that would take away the tension in the room and quell the flipping of his stomach. Jason licked his lips and stood up.

“I should head to bed and let you sleep.” He commented. “It’s late.”

“Jason, wait!” Carl responded quickly, almost reaching for him. “Can you…I mean…could you…”

“Could I what?” Jason asked softly.

Carl felt his face flush with embarrassment and hoped the older teen didn’t notice. He didn’t know why but he felt very lonely and unsafe at the thought of Jason leaving the room. He was enjoying his company.

“Could you stay? At least until I fall asleep?” Carl asked nervously, stuttering over his words. “The bed is big enough and…you make me feel safe.”

Carl’s face fell in disappointment when Jason didn’t respond and headed for the door. He closed the door over before returning to the bed, turning the lamp off and slipping under the covers on the other side of the bed. His side of the bed. It felt extremely bizarre to be in his own bed, next to his boyfriend and yet be forced to act like a stranger. At least the bed was big enough for them to sleep without touching one another.

Jason’s body jumped slightly when a nervously gentle arm draped itself over him. Carl pulled himself in closer so that he could spoon Jason gently, silently praying that the older teen didn’t object to the sudden physical contact. When Jason relaxed, Carl did too. He wanted so badly to feel more of Jason’s body, to trace his hands over the muscles but he knew that it would end in Jason leaving. He needed the older teen, even if it was just for the night.

Jason did his best to control his breathing. It wasn’t easy when he wanted nothing more than to turn around and embrace the younger teen, to kiss him until he was dizzy and to touch him everywhere to show that he wasn’t ugly because of his injury. He wanted so badly for Carl’s hand to feel his chest a little or to make its way down his abdomen to the top of his jeans. Part of him wanted to rub up against Carl while pretending to sleep just to provoke something into happening. Jason kept himself under control, however, as he knew he couldn’t do that until he was sure his boyfriend still loved and wanted him even with the amnesia. He calmed himself and waited for Carl to fall asleep.

 

_Carl glared at his father before standing up and grabbing the revolver from the back of his belt. He aimed it towards the bushes with two hands, the gun heavy in his hands since he was used to his Beretta. The stumbling and breathing got louder until the figure burst out of the bushes onto the train track. Carl dropped the gun to the ground. He couldn’t believe it. Standing in front of them with a cut on his cheek but otherwise unharmed and more importantly, alive, was Jason._

_Michonne lowered her sword and Rick smiled with relief. Carl collapsed to his knees from the shock of it. He couldn’t make sense of it. Jason was alive. He had taken on a group of armed men and somehow came out alive. Jason walked up to the boy and lowered himself down on one knee. Carl peered up at him from under his hat and openly accepted the hug Jason gave him. He could see the shock in the teen’s face and figured a hug was the best remedy._

_The Governor glared at Rick with his one good eye. The whole scenario was not playing out as he had hoped. Rick was being perfectly reasonable._

_“We let go of all of it and nobody dies. Everyone who is alive right now, everyone who’s made it this far. We’ve all done the worst kinds of things just to stay alive!” Rick pleaded with them. “But we can still come back. We’re not too far gone. We get to come back and I know we all can change.”_

_The Governor slowly removed the sword from Hershel’s neck. The old man smiled to Rick as he realised the leader of their group had indeed been listening to all the things he had been saying. Rick had changed and was actually trying to do the right thing, even with the Governor. The Governor, however, doubted he could ever let go of the past. He doubted any of them could._

_The Governor glared at Rick. “Liar!”_

_With one sudden swing, the Governor sliced into Hershel’s neck with Michonne’s sword, decapitating the old man only half way. Hershel’s head dropped to the side as his neck was sliced open, blood pouring down his shirt as he dropped to the ground. Rick screamed and opened fire on the Governor’s militia. The battle had begun._

_Michonne guided Carl’s hands and taught him how to move his arms so he could cut through things with the sword. What Carl hadn’t realised at first was how much skill, strength and stamina it took to use the sword effectively. You had to be in very good physical condition to keep it up for long. Michonne was noting, just as Jason had the day before, that Carl was a fast learner. He was getting the hang of the movements even if they did make his arms burn after a while._

_Michonne turned her gun to the fat man who had stood up and had Carl at knifepoint again._

_“Let the boy go!” Michonne demanded._

_“I’ll kill him! I’ll kill him!” The man yelled in a blind panic._

_Cold steel pressed against the back of his head. Before he could react a gloved hand ripped the blade from his hand and a boot slammed into the back of his knee. The fat man dropped to his knees with the cold barrel of a gun pressed to the back of his head._

_“No. You won’t.” Jason growled furiously and prepared to pull the trigger._

_Daryl finished off the man he was beating with a strong kick to the head._

_Rick took the large blade that had belonged to Joe out from the man’s belt. He glared over at the fat man that Jason held at gunpoint. Carl ran over into Michonne’s arms._

_“He’s mine.” Rick declared. His tone was ice cold._

_Jason holstered his gun and backed away. He couldn’t believe what he was seeing. If looks could kill, Rick’s glare could decimate entire armies._

_Rick marched over to the fat man who held his hands up._

_“Stay back! Please!” He pleaded for his life, standing up._

_Rick grabbed his collar and thrust the knife into the man’s stomach as deep as he could go. Blood erupted from the man’s mouth along with a gargled cry of agony. He screamed in terror and excruciating pain as Rick forced the blade upward and into his chest. Rick was opening him up like a bag._

_Jason stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Carl’s smaller frame tightly. He held him there, taking a moment to take Carl's hat off so he could pull the younger teen closer. They stayed there, locked in an embrace for what felt like hours to both of them. Carl eventually moved his head up to look at Jason’s face._

_“Is that a yes?” Carl asked softly, uncertain._

_Jason nodded and kissed Carl’s forehead. “That’s a yes.”_

_Carl tightened his hold of Jason, pulling them together as closely as he could. His heart felt like it was fluttering in his chest, his legs felt weak and he had a surge of happiness. A feeling that was almost alien to him because of the constant feelings of fear, rage and responsibility he felt every day of his life. This was something warm. Something exciting. Something positive. They both needed it and now they both had it._

_Rick spun around and quickly switched positions with Alex as the sniper fired, the bullet going through the man’s head and sending his body collapsing to the ground. Those who were unarmed ran away as gunfire broke out. Carl and Jason fired back at the other people, forcing them to take cover. Rick fired some shots at the same people._

_“Carl!” He yelled over the gunfire. “Get down now!”_

_Rick led them away in an attempt to run around the corner but someone on the roof shot at them, bullets raining down in front of them. Daryl led them back into the main area, running towards the doors at the far end. Gunshots rained down behind them and then around them, forcing them into the garage._

_A loud gunshot suddenly rang out from in front of him and he heard a cry of pain as the knife clattered onto the paving of the street. Ron curved his run as he slowed down to a stop and turned back to find the man writhing on the ground in agony, clutching his bleeding thigh that had received the bullet. Ron turned to the other side of the street where Carl came rushing out to join him with his M4 in his hands, still aiming at the man on the ground. Jason was close behind, looking out for more of the attackers._

_The man on the ground raised his arm out. “Please, man, please don’t kill me, man, please!”_

_Carl wasn’t sure to make of the man’s begging as he slowly approached._

_“Help me, please!” The man begged. “My leg!”_

_Carl glanced at Ron, unsure of how he felt about killing someone in front of his friend. He knew Ron didn’t understand how the world worked yet and this could cause a huge misunderstanding between them. The man on the ground took the opportunity and grabbed Carl’s leg before grabbing onto the gun, trying to pull it out of his hands. Carl struggled with the man who was surprisingly strong for his lean build._

_All of a sudden Jason pulled out his TRP Operator handgun and shot the man in the temple, blood and brain matter spraying onto the grass near Ron’s feet. The man’s body fell limp as his hands let go of Carl’s gun. Jason holstered his handgun as he glared back at the two boys who were staring at him in shock, though for different reasons._

_“All of these men die today.” Jason told them as he turned the safety back off on his AKMSU. “Every single one. No exceptions.”_

_Carl turned to Ron as he got his breath back from the brief struggle. “Go inside. We can keep you safe.”_

_Carl couldn’t help but giggle as Jason’s hands started rubbing shampoo into his long brown hair. Jason did it as forcefully as he could so he’d constantly move Carl’s head around in a playful manner while at the same time giving his hair a thorough wash. Once Carl’s head was covered with shampoo, Jason made sure to wash his own hair as heavily as possible. Carl opted to help him with it so he could move Jason’s head around playfully in mock revenge._

_Once the shampoo had been in for a couple minutes they rinsed their hair with the ever-welcoming hot spray of the shower head. They were fortunate enough to find a shower scrunchie hanging from the temperature control. Jason took the body wash and poured it onto the scrunchie before he started rubbing his body with it, covering himself from head to toe in the soapy lotion to remove all the ingrained filth on his skin._

_Carl watched Jason wash himself, biting his lip as he couldn’t help but marvel at the sight. It was the hottest thing he’d ever had the opportunity to witness. His heart skipped a beat when Jason closed the distance between them so he could start rubbing Carl’s body clean with the soapy scrunchie. Carl closed his eyes and flushed crimson as his body reacted to Jason’s ministrations, his member rising to attention after being cleaned like the rest of his body._

_Lori lay on her back as Maggie attempted to induce the baby. Unfortunately, the baby didn’t want to come out so they had no choice but to cut Lori open, which would mean sacrificing her life for the baby. They were trapped in the tombs of the prison with walkers roaming everywhere and were running out of time._

_“Carl? Baby, I don’t want you to be sad, okay?” Lori told her young son. “This is what I want, this is right. You take care of your daddy for me, alright? And your baby brother or sister.”_

_“You don’t have to do this!” Carl pleaded, tears falling down his face._

_“You’re gonna be fine. You’re gonna beat this world I know you will. You are smart, you are strong and you are so brave.” Lori told him with a proud smile. “And I love you.”_

_“I love you too.” Carl replied, sucking in a breath as his tears continued to fall._

_“You gotta do what’s right, baby. Promise me you’ll always do what’s right.” Lori continued, holding her son’s hand. “It’s so easy to do the wrong thing in this world, so if it feels wrong don’t do it. If it feels easy don’t do it, don’t let the world screw you!”_

_Lori cried with Carl as she tried to wipe his tears away. “You’re so good, my sweet boy. You’re the best thing I ever did. I love you!”_

_“I love you too!” Carl sobbed in response as she pulled him into a tight hug on the floor._

_“I love you! My sweet, sweet boy, I love you!” Lori continued as Maggie watched on, also in tears._

_One of the Governor’s men, a young man of around eighteen, ran away from the prison and stumbled upon Carl, Hershel and Beth. Carl aimed his silenced Beretta at the boy while Hershel rested against the front of the car, aiming his Glock._

_“Don’t shoot!” The teen exclaimed, holding his shotgun in one hand._

_“Drop the weapon, son.” Hershel ordered him._

_“Sure.” The teen answered, stepping forward. “Here.”_

_The teen continued to step forward, his eyes darting between the three people in front of him as he started angling the shotgun back at them. Carl waited a few more seconds but the shotgun still wasn’t on the ground. He pulled the trigger, shooting the boy in the head. His blood and brain matter splattered in the air and onto the leaf-littered ground as his lifeless body hit the ground with a thud._

Carl shot awake, bolting upright in bed as a cold sweat ran down his face. He gasped for breath, wondering if he had been holding his breath the entire time as he ran a hand through his long hair. He looked around the room. He was in his room. In Alexandria. Nothing bad was happening. It had all been a nightmare of sorts.

He tapped the bed to his left, searching for Jason’s warm body so he could seek some comfort but was disappointed when all he felt were cold sheets. He turned to look and his doubts were confirmed when he found the bed empty. Jason had gone back to his own room after Carl had fallen asleep, which is what they had agreed on but Carl had hoped Jason would stay. He sighed and shook his head as lights danced around his right eye, a hallucination because he knew he didn’t have an eye there anymore. If Jason wouldn’t sleep in Carl’s bed, then Carl decided he would sleep in Jason’s instead.

Carl groaned groggily as he forced himself out of the warm comfort of his own oversized bed and opened the bedroom door. Once on the landing he realised he had no idea which room was Jason’s and he didn’t want to wake up everyone in the house looking for him. A cough in the silence alerted him to someone being downstairs, so he carefully made his way down. He had to be very slow, holding the wall and letting his feet guide him as he couldn’t trust his eye to judge the distance correctly.

When he navigated his way into the living room, which was illuminated by the glow of the moonlight outside, he was surprised to find Jason asleep on the sofa using his jacket as a blanket. Carl noted that Jason slept with his arms folded, which he remembered reading that people who did that were used to sleeping with someone. Jason had told him he had a room so why was he sleeping in the front room? Carl felt himself getting irritated at Jason’s constant lying. Nothing seemed to make sense and though he didn’t have the memory to back it up, he was sure there were truths he wasn’t being told.

Jason groaned as he was shaken awake by someone. He wondered if he had slept in but the darkness in the room told him otherwise. He rubbed his eyes and looked up and to his right at the source of the shaking to find Carl standing over him. Jason was glad that the room was dark enough to obscure the fact his eyes had travelled the length of Carl’s body, as the younger teen stood there in nothing but his boxers. He bit his lip and forced his eyes to focus on Carl’s face.

“I thought you had a room.” Carl commented. “Why did you lie?”

“I didn’t lie.” Jason replied, yawning. “This is a room.”

“It’s not fair that I get a massive bed and you’re sleeping here.” Carl pointed out, annoyed.

Jason rubbed the sleep from his eyes. “Carl, what are you doing up at this hour?”

“I had a nightmare.” Carl answered, feeling embarrassed for sounding like a kid.

“Wanna tell me about it?” Jason asked, sitting up on the sofa and patting beside him to offer Carl a seat.

Carl sat down next to Jason, suddenly conscious that he was almost naked. Sitting next to a topless Jason didn’t help as it brought back some of the images from his nightmare, which he was starting to believe were memories. He couldn’t fathom why he’d be happy and comfortable showering with Jason though, even if the thought of it heated his blood.

“It was horrible. There was this guy, about your age, and I shot him. I remember it really well.” Carl explained with a low voice. “Seeing the bits of his brain, all the blood. He was bad. I knew it.”

Jason tentatively wrapped his arm around Carl’s shoulders. “What else?”

“My dad killed someone in a church, so did you.” Carl continued. “And he ripped this guy open one night because he hurt me.”

Jason rubbed Carl’s back gently, reminding himself to not let his hand wander under any circumstance. He was disappointed that the memories all seemed to be bad ones and that Carl hadn’t remembered anything to do with their relationship.

He sighed. “Carl, those were all memories coming back to you. Not nightmares.”

Carl stared ahead into the darkness of the room. If they truly had all been memories, then that meant he and Jason had been more intimate before than he was aware of. Why would Jason keep that from him though? And why would they be so intimate to begin with? Carl didn’t understand why Jason would be interested enough or want to be so close to him in the first place.

“How about we get some sleep and I’ll fill in the details tomorrow?” Jason asked, rubbing Carl’s back again.

Carl nodded and stood up, letting Jason gently guide him to the stairs. The older teen kept a hold of Carl as they ascended the staircase and made their way into their bedroom. Once Carl was settled down on the bed, Jason prepared to leave and head back downstairs but he only got as far as the bedroom door.

“Jason? Can you stay?” Carl asked, his voice small in the silent void of the room. “Until morning?”

Jason sighed and closed the bedroom door. “Okay.”

The older teen climbed back into the king-sized bed with Carl and lay on his side, getting himself comfortable. Once again, Carl’s arms found him and held onto him so this time Jason reciprocated the action. The younger teen gasped softly when he was pulled close against the older teen’s body but snuggled in calmly. He felt safer and more relaxed with Jason there and he was far too tired to question it. Carl allowed himself to enjoy the company as he drifted off to sleep once more.

 

Jason yawned as he made his way down the stairs, lazily clipping on his thigh holster for his gun and the sheath for his machete. He checked that he had spare ammo in his pockets, a habitual muscle memory at this point, as he made his way down the hall and into the front room and kitchen. In the kitchen, Carl was wiping the counter with a cloth while Michonne swept away the now shattered glass that the younger teen had accidentally knocked off the counter.

“You should see Denise about PT.” Michonne commented as she put the glass in the bin.

“PT?” Carl questioned, not understanding the abbreviation.

“Physical Training.” Jason answered, pulling on his leather jacket. “It’ll help you get used to doing things with only one eye.”

“I can manage.” Carl argued with a huff.

“Never said you couldn’t.” Jason quipped, tossing Carl’s hat at the teen. “Come on, I’ll take you.”

Carl sighed as he followed Jason out of the door and into the street. The two teens walked together in relative silence, occasionally waving at their fellow residents as they passed by. It was a beautiful day with a clear blue sky and plenty of sunlight. It would be a nice day to lie down by the lake or go for a walk in the woods. If Carl had his memory, Jason would have already suggested either one of the ideas.

"You don’t need to baby me so much.” Carl suddenly announced. “I can manage fine.”

“I wasn’t aware I was babying you.” Jason remarked, surprised at the sudden criticism.

“Michonne, my dad, Carol, you. You’re all doing it.” Carl continued, a hint of venom in his tone. “Watching me like I’m made of glass. Like I’m going to break. I’m not and I won’t.”

Jason froze for a moment as they reached the infirmary door. “Carl, we’re just worried about you after what happened. It’s because we care.”

“I know that but you don’t need to act like I’m fragile.” Carl retorted. “I don’t need to be looked after.”

“Are you sure?” Jason questioned, raising an eyebrow.

“Yes!” Carl spat back just before he banged his forehead against the door as he went to open it. “Shut up.”

Jason raised his hands, a gesture to show he hadn’t said anything. He didn’t have to as the small mistake made his point for him. He sighed as Carl closed the infirmary door behind him, leaving Jason outside on the porch. Looking out at the street, Jason spotted Abraham, Daryl and Glenn preparing for a supply run. He smirked. He felt like having a change of scenery.

 

Rick stared out at the small group that he had gathered in the church. Important discussions about the expansion and future plans had to be had. With all the corpses cleared, the walls repaired and the expansion construction underway, it was time to get things organised.

“We’re going to run out of food again.” Rick told them. “No matter how much food Glenn, Daryl, Abraham and Jason bring back.”

He rested his hands on his hips as he spoke to the small crowd. Among the faces were Gabriel, Maggie, Tobin, Bruce, Kent, Barbara, Carol, Morgan and Michonne.

“It’s been almost two years since people stopped making canned food, we’re already pushing past the expiration date on most things.” Rick continued. “The things that are still fresh aren’t the most desirable. Canned fish isn’t supposed to last three years.”

“And last year was a very lean winter.” Maggie commented. “I’m surprised we managed.”

Rick nodded. “We can’t afford to make any mistakes this time. We have to get serious about farming. Maggie, I know you have experience but it can’t just be you.”

“We can ask around, see if anyone else has farming experience.” Gabriel added.

“We’re also gonna need supplies, fertilizers, seeds and everything else we need for this.” Rick continued. “Deanna’s expansion plans have assigned space for farming but we may need more than that.”

“After recent events, some houses are vacant.” Tobin commented. “So, we can use some of the back gardens.”

“That sounds like a zoning problem.” Rick responded. “I’ll ask Abraham to help sort that when he gets back.”

 

An hour later Carl returned home from his physical training with Denise. Initially he hadn’t been very keen on going to it but the nervous woman had been a great help to him. She had even suggested a few simple games that could help that he could play alone or with someone else. He figured Jason would be the best partner for such games and decided he would ask him along with finally confronting him over his lies.

“Hey, Carl.” Michonne greeted him as she worked in the kitchen. “How was PT?”

“Good, actually.” Carl admitted as he took off his hat. “Is Jason here?”

“No, he’s out on a supply run with Abraham, Glenn and Daryl.” Michonne answered. “Anything I can help with instead?”

Carl thought for a moment. He remembered that he and Michonne were close as he had been the first to learn about her son. They had confided a lot in each other and probably knew each other more than most other members of their family unit did. If he trusted anyone to finally tell him the truth, then it was Michonne.

Carl took in a nervous breath. “I keep feeling like Jason’s hiding something from me. I mean, something I should remember but can’t. And I know you know what it is.”

Michonne stared back, resting her hands on the kitchen counter. “You’re right. He is and I do know what it is. He doesn’t want me telling you.”

Carl sighed incredulously. “Why not?”

“Because he’s scared and he’s being stupid.” Michonne replied, smiling. “I won’t break a promise by telling you…”

“Fine, whatever.” Carl huffed and started storming towards the stairs.

“But if you find his diary in his bedside drawer then that’ll tell you everything.” Michonne called back at the teen.

Carl smirked. So, she was being trustworthy enough to help. She was telling him without telling him. He carefully made his way up the stairs. He had a feeling the bedside drawer he was looking for was on the other side of his bed.

 

“Good gracious Ignatius.” Abraham muttered under his breath. “What the dick is this?”

Abraham, Glenn, Daryl and Jason had emerged from some woods into a clearing. By the looks of the large, torn open tents, smashed wooden crates and abandoned military vehicles, it was clear they had stumbled upon a military base. The long grass, rust on metal and skeletal remains told them it hadn’t been used in a very long time. There was an eerie silence to the former base.

The most striking thing about the base was not the abandoned military vehicles or the skeletal remains. The thing that had the four men confused was the make-shift campsite that had been made in the middle of the clearing. The perimeter of the clearing was marked by a schiltron of spears that would impale any walkers that attempted to approach. In the centre was a recently used campfire with human remains scattered about. However, the most disturbing image was what lay between each of the spears.

Between each spear at the front of the campsite were pikes with decapitated heads set on top of them. The heads were active, looking around and snapping their jaws at the men. The dried blood that stained the pikes indicated that the heads had been severed from living people before being placed on the pikes. These were not walkers. This was the work of a psychopath who killed the living and by the looks of the campfire, someone who ate the living as well.

“In pairs, stick together like wet on water and search for supplies.” Abraham told them. “Keep your guard up.”

“Don’t have to tell me twice.” Jason replied as he walked with Daryl. “Last person I want to meet is whoever did this.”

Before Glenn could accompany Abraham, he pulled out his knife and stabbed each of the heads one by one. They may have served as a warning to whoever approached but the campsite looked like it hadn’t been used in days at least. No one deserved to have their reanimated head on a pike forever, no matter who they were. He couldn’t help the cold shiver that ran down his spine at the thought of whoever had killed those people.

 

Carl felt his heart pound in his chest as his head started to throb. He was reading Jason’s diary and had already read through the times he had shared with Kellin, including his death. The interesting parts had started when Carl started being mentioned in the book and with each page a new memory returned. He was feeling slightly overwhelmed but forced himself to keep reading.

_Jason moved his hand to the back of Carl’s neck, placing his fingers strongly against it. This earned a gasp from Carl._

_“Your hand is freezing!” Carl gasped out._

_“Yeah, but it will relax you. Hold still.” Jason told him._

_Jason kept his cold hand on the back of Carl’s neck and sure enough the teen began to relax. After a while he could tell Carl was asleep, the expression on his face having softened completely. Jason retracted his hand and quietly stepped out of the car. He put his hands in his jacket pockets and stared up at the stars and thought about his conversation with Carl. He felt it was a shame that Carl still hadn’t experienced the warmth that he himself had felt with Kellin. It was different to friendship or the love of family. It was so much stronger and more intense. He would give that gift, that experience to Carl if he could but it wasn’t his place and never would be. Jason continued to stare at the stars above, lost in his thoughts._

He was starting to remember how things slowly developed between them. Jason had slowly fallen in love with Carl the more time they spent together. Carl smiled, back then Jason had no idea that the feelings were completely mutual.

_Carl turned to look at him and realised their faces were quite close together as a result of examining the scars. Jason realised this too and smirked._

_“We’re kinda close.” He teased._

_Jason had meant it as a joke but Carl couldn’t help but blush at the comment. He knew he cared a lot about Jason. It was obvious to most of the group when they had believed him to be dead at Terminus. Michonne, as his most trusted friend, knew that Jason had become very important to Carl. He felt his heart pound in his chest. He wanted something but he wasn’t sure what it was._

_Jason noticed the blush and the slight change in Carl’s breathing. He was suddenly nervous and Jason couldn’t figure out why. Their faces were close together and he had made a light joke about it but now neither of them seemed to want to move._

_“What’s up?” Jason asks quietly, concerned for Carl._

_Carl stuttered, their eyes meeting. He could see the nervousness and pain inside those blue eyes._

_“I…I don’t know.” Carl answered. His face was still red and Jason’s questions weren’t helping._

_Jason moved his face a little closer to Carl’s. They could feel each other’s breath against their faces with how close they were. He was starting to piece it together._

_“Carl?” Jason whispered, not taking his eyes off the teen’s. “Do you like me?”_

_Carl swallowed nervously as his blush intensified. His eyes darted between Jason’s eyes and Jason’s lips. He had never been this close to someone in his life. He had never felt this rush of adrenaline before, it was different from the adrenaline produced by fear or rage. It felt good. There was another feeling but Carl didn’t know how to describe it. Jason’s questioned returned to his mind, realising he awkwardly hadn’t answered it yet. It was an important question. Carl wasn’t sure what his answer was. He was feeling too many new and different things._

_“I…I don’t know.” Carl repeated, his face flaming up with embarrassment._

_Jason felt the very same adrenaline coursing through him. He had noticed how Carl’s eyes darted from his eyes to his lips, how he swallowed nervously and how red his face had turned. He recalled that Carl had never been intimate with anyone in his life. This situation was new to him and he didn’t know how to react. Although he said he didn’t know if he liked Jason or not, Jason took that as a positive reaction. He had to guide Carl through this. He had to make a decision._

_Carl’s eyes widened as Jason closed the gap between them. He felt warm lips on his own. They were soft and gentle. Nothing was forced. His heartbeat accelerated. This was what he had wanted. This was why he had got so nervous. The feeling he couldn’t describe was want. Desire. Jason pulled away slightly and gazed into Carl’s eyes, looking for any signs of rejection. He couldn’t find any._

_“Is this okay?” Jason asked, placing a hand gently on the back of Carl’s neck._

_Carl swallowed nervously again and nodded slowly. He wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do or what he was supposed to say._

Carl smiled as his heart ached at the memory of their first kiss and his true first kiss as well. It had been such a perfect and natural moment and one of the happiest he had ever had, especially in the apocalypse.

_Both of them took the moment to bask in the incredible sensation of their unity. After so much time together, so much fighting, surviving and loving, they were finally together. Their bodies matched their hearts. Joined. Carl had never felt anything like it in his life, he felt so full and complete with Jason lodged so snuggly inside him. Jason was panting above him, the hot, vice like nature of Carl’s virginity almost overwhelming him._

_Jason ghosted his lips over Carl’s before capturing them in another soft, gentle lip lock. They stayed like that for several moments, their lips and bodies joined with their hearts pounding in their heads. Eventually, Jason pulled back enough to break the kiss but remained close enough for his breath to caress Carl's skin as he spoke._

_“I love you, Carl.” Jason gasped out, his breathing heavy. “Fuck, I love you so much.”_

_Carl almost felt totally overwhelmed with emotion as Jason’s necklace gently tapped his own. “I love you too.”_

_Jason captured Carl’s lips with his own yet again as he made his first thrust, immediately making the younger teen whimper and making himself groan. Carl was so incredibly hot and tight around him he didn’t think he would last long at all. Jason breathed deeply as he made a second thrust, followed by a third as he picked up a slow and gentle rhythm, easing Carl into the new sensation._

Carl felt himself blush as he read the entry about their first time together. His groin twitched in response to the memory of Jason taking his virginity and making love to him. They had sometimes had sex for the sake of it but they made love far more often. It was an important distinction.

_Jason turned to check on Carl and make sure he was okay after seeing his friend die in front of him. He froze when he saw blood trickling down Carl’s cheek from under his hat. Rick noticed Jason’s horrified expression and turned to look at his son. He too saw the blood running down Carl’s cheek as the teen lifted his head and looked at his father. More blood poured from the hole where his right eye used to be. The bullet had struck his eye socket._

_“Dad?” Carl gasped out weakly before collapsing on the ground._

_“Carl!” Rick choked out. He couldn’t lose his son._

_Jason stared down at Carl’s lifeless form. Blood had covered his cheek as it ran down his face and continued to pour from his eye socket. The wound itself was horrific. His eye was gone, blood was everywhere and there were sharp bone fragments sticking out of it. As Jason stared at the wound and Carl’s motionless body he felt a cold shiver go through his whole body. His legs shook as his knees threatened to buckle and his face went white as a sheet. Jason grimaced as he swallowed down the bile rising in his throat. His chest felt tight, as if he suddenly couldn’t breathe._

_An inhuman bellow of horror erupted from Jason. It echoed around them as his heart broke into a million pieces, each shard stabbing and cutting his insides. He looked around as the walkers approached him. They were to blame for it. The walkers had taken everyone away from him in some form or another and this had been the last straw. Jason unsheathed his machete and sliced into the head of the nearest walker with a roar of rage. Another walker tried to grab him and received the large blade to the face as a result._

Carl felt realisation wash over him as he not only remembered who Jason was to him but also remembered all the things he knew about him. After all their time together he knew how Jason’s mind worked and understood that he no doubt blamed himself for what happened. He was fearful that Carl would reject him or blame him, so he had been keeping his distance. Carl had to stop that. He had to end it as soon as possible. Jason didn’t deserve to go through that anymore.

 

It was getting dark by the time Abraham, Daryl, Glenn and Jason returned from their supply run. They had ended up finding very little as whoever had made the schiltron had raided all the obvious places. Jason made his way into the house and found Rick and Michonne laughing together as they tried to feed Judith before she was put to bed.

“How’d it go out there?” Rick asked, serious for a moment.

Jason shrugged. “Didn’t find much except for evidence of a psychopath.”

“What evidence?” Michonne asked curiously.

“Some cannibal who ate people and put their heads on pikes.” Jason commented. “It was some of the creepiest stuff I’ve seen since the world ended.”

“You weren’t followed, were you?” Rick asked, the community’s safety his priority.

Jason shook his head. “Whoever it was had abandoned that camp days ago.”

Rick shook his head in disbelief. “Hope we don’t run into whoever they are.”

“You and me both.” Jason remarked before looking around. “Where’s Carl?”

Michonne couldn’t help the grin that crossed her face. “He’s upstairs in your room.”

“His room.” Jason corrected.

“Yours.” Michonne retorted as the teen made his way upstairs.

 

Jason knocked before opening the bedroom door where he found Carl sitting back on the bed reading a comic. Comics were easier for him to read with one eye as the pictures helped to tell the story and the speech bubbles had less writing in them. It would still strain him after a while though.

“Hey.” Jason greeted, closing the door behind him.

“Hey.” Carl greeted with a smile, putting the comic aside. “Can I ask you something?”

“Of course.” Jason replied, sitting down on the bed next to Carl.

Carl slipped his hand into his shirt and pulled out his necklace. “You have a similar necklace, don’t you?”

Jason nodded. “Yeah, I do.”

“Can I see it?” Carl asked, staring back at him.

Jason pulled his necklace out of his own shirt and showed it to Carl. The younger teen grabbed the necklace and pulled it closer to him so he could align it with his own. Both teens stared at the necklaces which joined together perfectly, their own heads only inches apart.

“I found them at Terminus.” Jason explained. “So, I gave one to you.”

Carl remained silent for a moment but nodded in acknowledgement as he stared at the necklaces. Eventually, he turned his head so he could look at Jason again, who was still feigning innocence and hiding the truth by staring silently at the necklaces.

“Jason?” Carl teased. “We’re kinda close.”

Jason stared back at him and felt his face flush. They were very close together, within kissing distance in fact. Jason licked his lip subconsciously as he looked at Carl’s own lips and then the one eye that was staring back at him. He was desperately fighting the temptation to kiss the younger teen.

To his surprise, Carl suddenly closed the gap between them and captured Jason’s lips with his own. The older teen froze for a moment in shock before relaxing into the kiss and returning it with vigour. Carl’s tongue was quick to lick at his lips so Jason parted them to grant Carl entry to his mouth, gently moaning as their tongues danced around one another.

Carl gently pulled away. “Is this okay?”

Jason grinned. “More than okay.”

Carl closed the gap between them again, one hand going to the back of Jason’s neck while the other rested on his thigh. Jason kissed back lovingly as one hand played with Carl’s long brown locks while the other rubbed up and down his thigh. Jason’s heart was racing at the exhilaration and relief of finally being able to kiss his boyfriend again. Carl had finally remembered him and he felt like he was on cloud nine.

 

**I want to thank everyone who sent in suggestions. They really helped piece together this chapter. I will need more suggestions for chapter 31, so feel free to keep sending in ideas for scenes you’d like to see.**

**I also want to apologise for the horrendous delay on this chapter. Between my partner’s birthday, Christmas, New Year and moving house, I just haven’t had time to get into the writing mood. This chapter was especially difficult because of all the emotions going on.**

**I know I always say this but the next chapter shouldn’t take as long.**

**Also, share your thoughts. What are Jason’s chest pains? And what about that strange camp site?**

**Thanks for all the votes/kudos/favourites/follows/bookmarks/subscriptions etc.**

**A special thanks to the reviewers of chapter 29: Madison, jar98, Hunter, Lindsey, Ibmax, Marleneiscool, Sarah_94, kingcarlgrimes, Kawaii, Anna Mary, Catie, Sarah, McDanno_and_Rarl_lover, Ron the killer, Jarry, Jane, Wat, Fangirlx, Jaleeamedeiros, Zoey, Sophia, Meek, xayylaax, Jay, Potato, BOI, AYYYYY, Alex, Nahylean, Shiva, Sebastian, Ciel, leylinjan, Video Ginesjima, Ellie, TigerInTheMoonlight, SundayAL, Dark.SKY27, CosmicKitten16, NicosWriting 87 and FEARTHEHIME.**  



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